Ep. 364 Compromising Kinks

This week the ladies are playing SOLO, and start with trying to cut down on the cussin’. After the catch up, Weezy gives us a little “tip” on how to save money on parking tickets while taking back shots. The heauxdearve this week not only gets into compromising kinks, but also into those who love the “unalive”. The ladies then get into being touch starved & the importance of a cuddle buddy. Finally they touch on the benefits of a casual partner and much more!

SUNDAY, MAY 5TH 2024 EartH Theatre!
London, England. We are coming for our final show!
So get off your fanny, spend some quid, and come see the bloody show mate!
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SUN MAY 26TH
TwoGether Land!
We are coming to Fair Park in Dallas, Texas!
https://twogetherland.com/

SATURDAY, APRIL 27TH 2024 BLACK EFFECT PODCAST FESTIVAL
Atlanta, Georgia! The ladies join the rest of the Black Effect crew and are going in RAW.
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Become a Patron at http://Patreon.com/whoreibledecisionsFollow the hosts on social media Weezy @Weezywtf & Mandii B @Fullcourtpumps and follow the Whoreible Decisions pagesInstagram @whoreible_decisions
Twitter @whoreiblepodDon’t forget to tag #whoreibledecisions or @ us to let us know what you think of this week’s episode!Want some Whoreible Decisions merchandise? GET YOURS NOW AT http://WHOREHIVE.COM

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Guess what decision We're about to make?

Speaker 2 (00:04):
Horrible decision?

Speaker 1 (00:08):
How do everybody?

Speaker 3 (00:09):
We are the Horrible Decisions Podcast and we are going
to be in Dallas, Texas Memorial Day weekend, which is
a Sunday. We're gonna be headlining the two Togetherland Festival
and you bitch is better than I.

Speaker 1 (00:17):
How no motherfucker work on Sunday? Call out?

Speaker 4 (00:20):
Ho?

Speaker 5 (00:21):
I mean you can do that. But also it's a
three day weekend. They have Monday off. We will see
you guys in Dallas, Texas at the together Land Festival.
Make sure you get your tickets now. We will be
live on the podcast stage. That's May twenty six. Get
your tickets now at togetherland dot com.

Speaker 1 (00:40):
Hey guys, welcome to another episode of four Blad. This
is yours.

Speaker 3 (00:46):
I'm your girl, Mady b aka dead Beach. Hi, everybody,
welcome back for another episode.

Speaker 1 (00:51):
I'm weezy. We are in the studio today with no guests.

Speaker 5 (00:54):
Ooh, I know y'all happy, Go ahead and play with
y'all pussy now, beach.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
Uh you looking at me like that? Okay? Okay, well
if you at word, don't play with yo pussy.

Speaker 3 (01:04):
By the way, speaking of work, I have had people
like on set be like, oh, you're a podcaster, what's
your podcast called? And the second they click on something
like we curse so much in the forty first forty
five seconds, I'm like, I can't imagine how y'all feel
when your headphones die.

Speaker 1 (01:21):
I mean, do we just curse right now? Go ahead
and play with Joe pussy beach.

Speaker 5 (01:30):
Birth though, yeah, see's anatomy pre and bitch is a
female name for a dog, so both of those are
technically yeah, it's giving signs.

Speaker 1 (01:41):
Noah, Okay, you're right.

Speaker 5 (01:44):
I think that we should. We both recorded a lot
the next time we in the studio.

Speaker 3 (01:48):
You're worse than me, I'm gonna work on it is
Mandy worse than me? Who curses one?

Speaker 1 (01:52):
Thank you? Thank you? I like, well, who would you say?

Speaker 4 (01:59):
What? Ho?

Speaker 1 (02:01):
Whoa? I feel like it's here the oh there. I
really don't think that you say.

Speaker 3 (02:05):
Nigga a lot when we have a white guess and
it's and it advites you. I don't think there should
be a nigga I wanna say nigga counter, not the
not the nothing you are. No, I was gonna say
a nigga counter. You know what a nigga counter. I
don't think we need a nigga. A nigga clock on
how many nigga times you got. But I'm just saying,

(02:26):
we have white guests and you say nigga, I'll be saying.
They're like, okay, I'm not gonna lie. I only catch
myself as it's coming out. Then I'm just like, fuck,
I already said it, So I'll be.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
Thinking of not to say that.

Speaker 5 (02:34):
When we was with Julie Ginger and he was like,
cause these niggas, I was like, now she'll say it back.

Speaker 1 (02:38):
So here's the thing I do.

Speaker 5 (02:39):
I do do what it little tis because they talk
a little bit too comfortable, and if they say the
ship next to us, we're gonna have to clot the ass.

Speaker 1 (02:46):
Actually, now that i'm thinking about it, puck their butts,
I'm gonna try not to curse. I say it, okay.

Speaker 3 (02:52):
So like the volume in which I say nigga in
front of white people is really up to their proximity
to other niggas. For example, Rory, I don't get scared
about saying niggas with Liz Goldwyn. I give her one
or two, okay, because I'm just like, I know your
other friends they like, and I'll be like, I'll let
me cho. But when I'm real passionate about something and
I'm like about to cry and we talk about Man

(03:13):
or South, I'll be like, you no niggas just and
she don't care obviously because she too. But with Rory,
I feel like you listen to like music every day.

Speaker 1 (03:21):
Mall be like no, no, no, no no no, So
it's okay. I mean, Julian definitely can't say nick.

Speaker 5 (03:25):
For me. It's really hard because not I only fuck
with niggas. Like if I'm talking about men, there ain't
no cracking, so they know I'm not gonna start naming
all the words.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
That we call people of other ethnicities.

Speaker 5 (03:38):
However, I only deal with one, and these niggas be
pissing me, y'all.

Speaker 3 (03:43):
He motherfucker, So I know he just said we shouldn't
be cursing too much. Okay, I'm not cursing for the
rest of the If you've never heard of our show,
it's actually about to be fair. It's about decolonizing king
for niggas. But you're allowed in here to listen, and
we appreciate your subscriptions because.

Speaker 1 (04:01):
You know what it pays our nigga.

Speaker 5 (04:02):
Bills and so hopefully, uh, you support us with our
book coming out. I kind of wanted that to be
our ketchup. Oh, I'll put nigga in one chapter. That's
the wait, Really, you're limiting the use of nigga in
our book.

Speaker 1 (04:14):
No?

Speaker 5 (04:14):
No, I literally I thought that you let me thought
that's why we really wanted a black author so she
could comfortably get our voices across the paper.

Speaker 1 (04:23):
Well, I'm I'm.

Speaker 3 (04:24):
Writing mine out where like she's just editing, but like, uh,
I will read you a little part of mine. So
I literally put Beard Bay in scissors scissors scissors in
a group chat. I'm actually going to read you guys
a text. So I forget a lot of shit. And
I was like, damn, I don't want to lie because
it's not like I'm lying, it's just how I remember something.

(04:44):
So this is how I started a text to them. Hey,
I know this sounds kind of crazy, but I'm working
on writing this book with Mandy, and I wanted to
fact check with y'all because one of the chapters is
all about my threatfle They wrote, Lol, Okay, I said,
all right, here, there we go.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
Happy Tuesday. Everybody did I.

Speaker 3 (05:02):
Eat the come out of scissors or did you pull
it out and I licked it off of her pussy? Sorry,
can't remember, Oh my god, he said, definitely, I pulled
out out of her pussy and put it in your mouth.
Out of body experience. I could have passed out from that.
My body was nutting. And also add this in your book.
You turned into a senior citizen after you come. Tell

(05:23):
the people that.

Speaker 5 (05:26):
And then he said you should also add in that
time that when you did, you started petting her.

Speaker 1 (05:31):
And then she said, bitch, are you petting me?

Speaker 3 (05:34):
You ain't in this, no mo, because see when I come,
it's like I pass out and you're like, I was
trying to do this to let them niggas. No, I'll
still I rubbed a titty like in a circular motion,
like I'm still in it. We still a ah. But
here's one of the things that I wrote. And this
is when I was like, oh, this is so like Black.

(05:54):
Literally there's a chapter where I wrote, now mind you,
and in parenthesies, I'll put nigga shit like Black should
to say.

Speaker 1 (06:01):
Oh, that's the only time you're going to put in
the book. No, no, no, In the parentheses.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
I'll read you something I wrote. Finally we get to bed,
beard Bay immediately kisses her. I can't remember if it's
their first kiss or not, but I could remember I
was not needing to be involved. I felt everything that
her body could be feeling, excitement, pleasure, nerves, this strange
way of feeling connected to her and making me feel
very healthy and safe. I even remember her peeking her

(06:25):
eye open as a way of making sure I was
looking and feeling comfortable.

Speaker 5 (06:28):
But this nigga, on the other hand, that's a second
count already was just happy to be an m mofucker.

Speaker 3 (06:34):
I will say he's consistently one of the most sexy
guys in the room, but it was still his first threesome.
And I love watching a nigga on his knees serving
a bitch. Oh sorry, two niggas three, that's three.

Speaker 1 (06:45):
It within ten, all right, So maybe I should break
it up. It's giving Mandy chapter. Well, actually, no, my
work on this book has been hard. H You started
with the pain chapter. No, bitch, put those as.

Speaker 3 (07:03):
Last many Mandy and I, by the way, just calling
like some of them are hard to so we say,
oh these are painful, these are nice.

Speaker 1 (07:08):
So when I say.

Speaker 5 (07:10):
There's there are certain chapters that I literally went through
and I put last last last, have to work through
my therapist with this. One of the ones that I
actually felt comfortable working through brought a lot of anxiety
to me. So, uh, I am doing a chapter on
my abortion, which is why I hit you up and
me with my friends we've been talking about, uh, just

(07:32):
all of our experiences with abortions lately, but basically for
this chapter specifically, not only is my experience included, but
I did an interview with my mom and maybe a
day and a half after my abortion, it never happened.

(07:54):
Me and my mom never revisited it, We never talked
about it. It was never a conversation, and so for
this book specifically, I interviewed her to see how she
felt about me coming to her and how I said,
how she remembers the day that I told her walking
with me into the clinic and I had to relive

(08:17):
kind of my abortion all over again that I haven't spoken.
So I interviewed my mom. We ended up speaking a
lot about not only that experience with me, but her abortions,
one being with my dad. So there was a lot
about relationship I didn't know one was with my dad

(08:37):
and it was at the end. It was literally the
abortion that she had knowing that. I mean, well, I
don't know if this is going to make the book,
and I mean, I'll share a little bit of it now.
But basically her that abortion with my dad was because
she knew she could no longer stand the abuse with him,
and so she had the abortion right before we ended

(08:58):
up in a shelter because she had to get away.

Speaker 1 (09:00):
No, I don't want to cry.

Speaker 5 (09:00):
It's been a lot. And then this was the first
time I asked my friend who gave me the money
for my abortion. I interviewed her, and it's just like,
there's so much about my past that I just put behind.

Speaker 1 (09:14):
Me and shout out to Kita, love you. We're still
friends to this day.

Speaker 5 (09:21):
I called her and I remember we literally relived our friendship.
We weren't that close because I felt like she stole
my best friend from me in high school because we
went to different high schools after middle school. Shout out
to Ali and us having the conversation. I had never
asked her what that money meant to her. She was
my only friend at the time that had a job

(09:42):
and she literally sent me the money that she made
at Coldstone And so this was my first time. My
abortion was right before me going into junior year.

Speaker 1 (09:53):
Did you ever pay her back? Did you? Guys say?

Speaker 5 (09:54):
I paid her back immediately, which is which is what
I found out. She was like, we never talked about
it again. All you kept saying was you'll pay me back,
and you pay me back, but we never discussed it.
And mind you, she and this is how listening back
to it, my abortion was only five hundred dollars, she said.

Speaker 1 (10:17):
I called and was like, I got a hundred. My
mom didn't have nothing.

Speaker 5 (10:20):
She maybe gave me like three hundred dollars, and she
was like, at the time, that was like fifty thousand dollars.

Speaker 1 (10:24):
Yeah. So, like the.

Speaker 5 (10:27):
Conversations I'm having around what's going in this book are
hard because I realized having an abortion that young, all
of my friends having an abortion that young, We all
know we had abortions, and we don't really talk about it.
And to know that I literally have not had the
conversation with my mom or one of my friends who
even helped me pay for it was brought a lot

(10:52):
of anxiety to me. To even hear it because it
was what I feel like, to this day, my mistake.
It's also funny because I had to relive that day
I was with you is with that motherfucking gang banger nigga.

Speaker 1 (11:06):
They got locked up, and so I'm abortion with that.

Speaker 5 (11:11):
So I'm just like this this book therapeutically, if that's
even a word.

Speaker 1 (11:17):
Uh, has been a lot on me.

Speaker 5 (11:19):
I'm recording my therapy sessions with my with with my
therapist for this book.

Speaker 1 (11:26):
But that doesn't feel invasive. I mean I ask everyone,
so as you're giving the by the way, we should
explain why you're recording them. I mean, I'm recording them
for a multitude of reason.

Speaker 5 (11:36):
We have a book editor, well, we have a book editor, yes,
But for me, I've been in therapy for three years.
I am very much in the present and plan to
be a better person in the future. I cut off
from everything that doesn't fit well. My trauma response and

(11:59):
defense mechan is removing myself. I recently had a conversation
with my therapist that was so uncomfortable because in writing
about this book, I keep referring to my past self
as she she did, like, it's.

Speaker 1 (12:13):
Not even me.

Speaker 5 (12:15):
And so I'm having this outer body experience, trying to
realize that she is me, that's actually my experience. And
I keep referring to myself in past tense like it's
a whole other person because either my decisions, I don't
like them. And that's why I told you with writing
this book, it was going to be really important for
me to not fully be prideful of all the things

(12:39):
I've done, because I'm not happy of the decisions and
such that I've made all the time with every man
every time I lay down the things, you know, within
my family dynamic. And so it's like really been interesting
getting through this. So I love that we've got into

(13:00):
a place where we both like can agree to kind
of what we want to share in this book. But
this process heavily weighing on me, from the divorce of
my last podcast to dealing with this, to dealing with
the Internet, to dealing with the comments, Like it has
been just heavy because it's.

Speaker 1 (13:18):
Been a lot.

Speaker 5 (13:19):
It's been a lot, like literally from possibly trying to
reach out to my cousin about like his sexuality because
that's a part of my antal sex story, like I'm
getting into I'm Jamaican anal sexty you gay, And now
I'm in a place where a bit chy'all love a boodle,
like literally being able to see my transgression of just

(13:40):
who I become and having to really sit with things
that make me uncomfortable. It's it's been a really good experience,
a really heavy experience. But I'm like hoping that y'all
like this book and y'all buy it, y'all go see
us on tour next year.

Speaker 3 (13:54):
I mean, I'm only in the erotica stages of the book,
which is kind of scary, Like you just kind of
even scared me talking just now. One of my chapters
is about an our word story and mine was very violent.
And he's a popular person in the industry and not anymore.
I'm sure I'm making more money than him, but he

(14:15):
was once upon a time. And it's crazy because, like
I remember hitting up Charlemagne and I told him who
it was, and I was like, should I not include
that this person was famous that did this to me?

Speaker 1 (14:28):
Oh, you got to include that, And he was.

Speaker 3 (14:29):
Like, well, a lot of you at that age because
what I was telling him about a little bit, And really,
I think the reason I went back to that hotel room,
and that experience happened to me was probably because he
was famous, right, I'm nineteen twenty.

Speaker 1 (14:43):
I think it was nineteen.

Speaker 3 (14:44):
But yeah, like that young dumb girl shit like, I
don't know the power in saying no now is so
easy to me.

Speaker 5 (14:55):
And you don't understand though, the power dynamics either of celebrity.

Speaker 3 (14:59):
Like because remember I asked for help, right, but we
and they didn't help me because of who he was.

Speaker 5 (15:04):
We've talked about. I shared both of my stealthy experiences
on this pod. You know who one of them was.
One of them was the other one. I'll tell you
when we're done. Both of them were rich, famous celebrities,
and I even recalled not feeling violated because Okay, they

(15:26):
got the money, I'll get the plan B. And also
I didn't know stealthy was a violation or an assault
or some because I consented to have sex with you
with protection you pulling it off later. Of course I
didn't consent to that, but also in my mind though
it was violating to not feel violated in the moment

(15:48):
because of who it was.

Speaker 1 (15:48):
Have you ever confronted them? No? I did, did you? Yep?

Speaker 3 (15:54):
Wanted to talk to him about it got influenced by
another one of his rap made and.

Speaker 1 (16:01):
He acted like I was tripping.

Speaker 3 (16:02):
I think he said I was tripping that he was like, yeah,
I feel like if I saw him now, I might
spit on him. But I really just kind of pity him,
I guess, because like I know, I'm not the only person,
because one of his bandmates told me that he'd heard
it before, and he told me that in confident. Wow,
not confidence to me that she put me up. But nah,

(16:25):
I think the craziest part about my story and y'all
read in the book, is that I literally ran out
of the room ask for help, and when he came
behind me, he was like, Yo, she's drunk and I
asked a woman for help. That's the crazy thing about
some of these And I'm like, damn, I do have
to include that he's a famous person that you do.
But the thing that's difficult about it is people will
tell you or act as though you're, you know, searching

(16:47):
for this clout within this thing. Bro, a famous nigga
doing that to me is not going to make her
break my career or this this story or this book.
But I do think and I kind of empathize now
with some women that choose to come out. I guess
I always have, but like I realize, like, damn, you
kind of want to release it, and it is a release,
but I haven't got to that part of the book.

(17:07):
I mean, I'm at this super juicy, nasty part of
the book right, Like I'm talking about how I was
sucking come off my fingers from scissors, how wet she was,
how we would go in the bathroom when beard baby
was sleep and we would dish about the threesome, like
just fun shit I've never talked about. And also what
makes this book even crazier is like I'm falling in
love with someone while writing this book and experiencing new things.

(17:29):
I'm like, I don't know, I just it's weird because
I just I thought it would be more about like
my release from like old bane and realizing I'm in
this empowering moment, and now I'm just like, oh girl.

Speaker 5 (17:44):
We wrote this proposal when I was still witnessed nigga.
The chapters that are last last are with him. I
hate that I have to talk about a fun time
with someone that I hate.

Speaker 1 (17:56):
No, like I've been able to give that Yes, I've
released in two years.

Speaker 5 (18:03):
Well in I guess before we get intoarve vanilla shit,
because bitch, I got outline and we're gonna stick to it.

Speaker 1 (18:09):
This was in your outline. It was it was I
want to ask you, how do you remember.

Speaker 5 (18:18):
And enjoy or relive or try to think back to
good moments with people that ended up hurting you so badly?

Speaker 1 (18:26):
I forgave myself. Listen, Old Bay is a dope person.

Speaker 3 (18:33):
He's fun. I have fun memories with him. He definitely
violated my trust and my loyalty, but I forgave myself
because I just was like, there were so many good memories.

Speaker 1 (18:44):
He'll change, He's great. We're such a fit.

Speaker 3 (18:47):
Who am I gonna meet that also has money too
and can travel the world with me? Boom next week,
bitch anyway, just saying like these niggas and my new
nigga's finer and more connected to me and my body
and spiritually able to like understand that.

Speaker 1 (19:03):
He needs to fill me up. I was so surface
level with Old Bay.

Speaker 3 (19:06):
I was having so much fun with this person that
like I just kind of thought it'll work itself out.

Speaker 1 (19:13):
But I forgave myself. That was the thing. I spent
so much time in therapy. This is not a projection.

Speaker 3 (19:19):
Yelling about this nigga being mad and feeling not jealous
but just well, yes, jealous that he could move on.
He moved on with someone else and she's beautiful and like,
I'm sure she's great, and I was jealous that she
could possibly be getting a version of him that I
didn't see.

Speaker 5 (19:38):
But I forgave myself because I should have left that
nigga a while ago. I think that's my problem. I'm
so upset with him, but now I'm like upset that
he's not here. That's my problem. I think that that's
why you should be happy. I know, but that's where
I'm having the difficulty. I'm not interested, like I'm still
where are we? I'm literally almost a full year out

(20:01):
of this fucking relationship and I'm not.

Speaker 1 (20:05):
I don't feel at all any further in.

Speaker 5 (20:09):
Feeling empty without him, Like I still as much as
he hurt me, there's so much that I missed about
how he made me feel or the feelings of those things.
And we'll get into that for the horrible decision, because
it's kind of where I've been, but we'll get to
it to it anellowship of this week. I wanted to

(20:30):
have fun with this just.

Speaker 1 (20:30):
A little bit, oh, because we argue about dre a
few weeks ago, and.

Speaker 5 (20:33):
This is some well, this one isn't. This one isn't
current events because bitch, fuck that shit. Y'all are getting
current events out of me. But this one comes from
spiritual word. Uh. And this is actually funny because I
wanted the room, if anything, we could talk and open
up the floor to y'all with how y'all are using
your dick outside in these streets?

Speaker 1 (20:53):
You bless you?

Speaker 5 (20:55):
I felt another one coming. A new study says that
five percent of American are now having sex to save.

Speaker 1 (21:03):
On heating bills.

Speaker 5 (21:04):
Five percent made surging utility costs.

Speaker 1 (21:08):
Let me, let me get, let me get the thing.

Speaker 5 (21:11):
As for a recent report by New homes Mates, forty
six percent of the thousand Americans surveyed are finding it
challenging to cover their bills, and approximately a quarter ought
to wear additional clothing, while over a third have decided
between heating and buying groceries to stay warm. Five percent

(21:33):
are engaging in intimate activities huh, while two percent are
actually just choosing to drink liquor, because y'all.

Speaker 1 (21:40):
Know that should make you hot.

Speaker 5 (21:43):
For a more lasting solution, the report found that sixty
percent of homeowners made energy saving upgrades to their homes.
This included sixteen percent who upgraded their windows twenty two
percent who adopted their thermostatched, which is great because clearly
they have money. But basically, women, couples or singles are
choosing instead of putting on the heat and raising their

(22:04):
utility bills, to just bite the motherfucker over and have
some sex.

Speaker 3 (22:08):
I've done some dumb shit to like, I'll tell you
the dumbest thing that I've done.

Speaker 1 (22:12):
Please share, audience, save to save money.

Speaker 3 (22:17):
So you probably heard me mention my nigga drives, my
street has cleaning on, like I think it was Wednesday
from midnight, midnight to three am. He was like, damn, bro,
I should just park and get the ticket. The ticket's
gonna be a hundred dollars whatever. I was like, or
we can go out for three hours and save the
money that you would have got on the ticket because
we're already drunk, so we only gonna get two drinks

(22:39):
when we go to Buns or whatever spot.

Speaker 1 (22:41):
We're gonna be straight.

Speaker 5 (22:42):
Wow, I actually thought you were gonna say, dumb, let's
just fucking the car and then you can move it.

Speaker 1 (22:48):
I literally thought, oh, I'm gonna tell you what they do.
Still spent money, not a honey for the ticket. So
this is what I've been doing lately. So couldn't find
a spot.

Speaker 3 (22:58):
The other night we went to this party and he
was like like, damn baby, I was called.

Speaker 1 (23:01):
It was raining. He's like, let me double park. Kiss
you can really the lower he SAIDs.

Speaker 3 (23:05):
A wild place. So then you know, pussy was out
look at juicy and you could see his car from
the window.

Speaker 1 (23:12):
Bitch. We was fucking just like this, waiting for the
cop to come, just waiting for whatever. Fuck. I was like,
oh did the police? No, no, you're not getting your ticket?
Oh out And he was.

Speaker 5 (23:22):
Unting out the window for a parking police safer. He
watched that pussy, and I watched for the police. I'm
not playing with speaking of the police, I.

Speaker 3 (23:31):
Just want to say a lot of cops know who
we are, and it's a very uncomfortable situation.

Speaker 1 (23:35):
Is this happened to you when a girl when you
were in jail?

Speaker 5 (23:38):
Wait, calm down, Oh sorry, that mean wo bitch whoa,
it was what you just said. I'd like to share
my personal story here.

Speaker 1 (23:44):
Have you cheered my toes like me a few weeks ago?

Speaker 3 (23:46):
I'm like, let me talk about tell you what the job?

Speaker 5 (23:50):
No, bitch, I actually, uh have met quite a few
cops and it's crazy because I like him in a uniform.
Sobe blue lives matter just as much as blue balls.

Speaker 1 (24:02):
Oh many way? Is that bad?

Speaker 5 (24:05):
Way?

Speaker 1 (24:05):
Okay? Sorry, that was a bad joke, y'all work. We're
comedians here. There's a comedian in my slash.

Speaker 5 (24:10):
So in my splash, my slash, I'm a media host,
personality producer, comedian. Comedian allows me to offend everybody. I
had to add it.

Speaker 1 (24:21):
Okay, babe, it was a bad joke. Sorry, So tell
us about this motherfucker cop. So no, no, no, I'm just
saying that. And I think I mentioned it to you.

Speaker 5 (24:30):
During my December stint on the dating app that should
go unannounced, I matched with a nigga who was in
the academy and I was so ready because you know,
I already had a firefighter.

Speaker 1 (24:43):
I said, ooh, the next will gonna be a cop,
different uniform. I'm hype. I actually love a.

Speaker 5 (24:47):
Man in uniform. But it just wasn't working. Uh, it
just wasn't It just wasn't working. But the cops that
I've met on the out, y'all listen to the pod
by the way, because y'all stopped me on the train,
y'all stopped me on the corner. I didn't have at
least three four cops be like.

Speaker 1 (25:03):
Like your show me like what you're doing.

Speaker 5 (25:05):
I have a lot of women come up to me,
women cops. Do you think it's weird that cops listen
to us?

Speaker 1 (25:11):
No, I mean, no one's ever come up to me.
That's not.

Speaker 5 (25:13):
But I ain't gonna hold you any any career that
has an extensive overtime pay full of pores because you
could always just say, babe, I'm working like lawyers, cops, doctors.

Speaker 1 (25:30):
Like, I don't know, want to be a horror to
listen to the show? No, No, you don't. I'm not
even a horror and I do this.

Speaker 5 (25:34):
Show so so in your slash liars there, Okay, gotcha?

Speaker 1 (25:39):
Actually, do you want to know how much about Hawaii?
Am so? For this Hawaii trip?

Speaker 3 (25:44):
We're like looking up shit, trying to figure out where
we're gonna go, right, And I was like, yo, I
just want us to have a really relaxing time, Like
I don't want to party. Maybe we'll look for like
a little black in Oahu group and we'll do one
little aprob thing we go to. Baby. He was like, yeah,
I want to wake up really. Plus we're gonna be
six hours. Let's relax girl. Somehow I stumbled upon a
sex party on a yacht in Hawaii the day we leave,

(26:06):
and I was like.

Speaker 5 (26:07):
Oh, no, y'all gotta say the next night. Yeah, yeah, no,
you just have. I was like, hey, I know that
we were talking about relaxing.

Speaker 1 (26:13):
How am I gonna lie? And this is now?

Speaker 3 (26:15):
You just have to let them know for research purposes.
I literally said, I think I should charge this to
the car. I was like, oh, bitch, yep.

Speaker 4 (26:23):
No, no, no, no, no, Now if you want to fly
me to Hawaii on the business so that I too
can experience this for research now, I just feel like
they don't need.

Speaker 1 (26:35):
To be charging me because I'm gonna plug them. But no.

Speaker 3 (26:37):
We literally had to extend the fucking little car, extend
the saying, and I was like, yeah, I really feel
like I should be doing this. It's very difficult when
you're like trying to be good, not try, because the
horror comes out of you, you know, like where horror,
the horror, horror, horror.

Speaker 1 (26:55):
It's really bad.

Speaker 3 (26:56):
Like I literally can't look at women in pilates or
you yoka, Like.

Speaker 1 (27:01):
It's like, so you sexualized women.

Speaker 5 (27:05):
I'm horny because there's a war even side of me.

Speaker 1 (27:10):
Bro, has anyone ever done a happy baby position? You
know what? This is? No go ahead? You just want
to work your ass?

Speaker 5 (27:17):
No no, no, no, no, no no, Like, oh wait, you
really when you you can't do it in it?

Speaker 1 (27:22):
Like is it? Is it a squirt? Is that? Why? Oh? Bro?

Speaker 5 (27:26):
You miss how nasty y'all? She this happy baby and
you basically stretch.

Speaker 1 (27:31):
Your Oh yeah, I ain't gonna lie. I only look
at bitches when they dog e yo, pussy crowd crowding cow?
What are this everybody? And like that's the point, It's like,
what the fuck?

Speaker 3 (27:42):
This ship is so horrish and sexual that, like I
just want to know if I'm in a yoga class
of fifteen bitches, you telling me nine ain't thinking the city.

Speaker 1 (27:51):
I'm thinking, I ain't gonna hold you. They have to
look good. I don't know you could be ugly and
I still think about it. Oh my god, all right, listen,
ugly people.

Speaker 3 (28:01):
To have hot sex. I like, gang, you never watch people.

Speaker 5 (28:08):
Oh I'm not gonna lie literally and I've said it
too much times on here. Now I literally be like,
oh you so fine, Oh you're so fine, Oh you're
so fine. I literally come up of how good they look, bitch,
and if they ugly, I'll be like, this doesn't work
for me.

Speaker 1 (28:21):
Okay, bitch, I'm gonna start sending you. I'm gonna start
sending you videos so you can see these niggas be fun. Yep.
The way these motherfuckers keep getting me to subscribe today,
only fans just gonna look at the body.

Speaker 4 (28:33):
No.

Speaker 1 (28:33):
The only thing I can't do is a bad wig.
No no, no, well I girl in South Africa. I shouldn't
have paid her that wig.

Speaker 5 (28:39):
With men and they have to look so good that
I can imagine them being my partner Hardwig hard life,
because I was like, ooh baby, take that, ooh baby,
give that, ooh baby, and I'll be acting like the
man is my man and I'm watching him in action
with another man. This is where my mind goes. I
am I am directing okay, but anyways, let's to get

(29:00):
into our hoar dirve.

Speaker 1 (29:02):
Not for this.

Speaker 5 (29:03):
It's kind of blending vanilla shit with a hoar dirve.
I want your advice for this, give me a sex
tip for this advice.

Speaker 1 (29:12):
South. After admitting that she reported her husband.

Speaker 5 (29:17):
To the police because of his creepy sexual kink, a
woman has asked for clarification on whether or not she
was in the wrong.

Speaker 1 (29:27):
Was the King? I'm about to get to it, because
you know, I like a better knife.

Speaker 5 (29:30):
So a woman has been urged to pack up her
things and leave her spouse after she shared that his
sexual kink made her feel uncomfortable and she had reported him.

Speaker 1 (29:38):
To the police. Bab dl, do I know the King?
You know the King? It's not baby diaper And based on.

Speaker 5 (29:46):
Where we kind of draw the lines with our fantasies,
this is why I wanted to ask this question, especially
based a couple of weeks ago on yours.

Speaker 1 (29:54):
South. Oh my god, hold on, let me get to it.
She says.

Speaker 5 (29:58):
I told him it makes me very uncomfortable, but I
went along with it for a short period of time
because he said it's the only thing that can get
him off now.

Speaker 1 (30:08):
But I just couldn't continue.

Speaker 5 (30:09):
With it anymore as it was making me fear for
my life. His kink is essentially waterboard to have me
to pretend to be dead and lifeless. The woman revealed
that this sexual preference was a recent change, and hiss
caused her to question her husband's mental state. Okay, he's
also been getting a lot more angry and aggressive with
me later lately, she adds. Wanting to get help for him,

(30:33):
the woman decided to report him to the police so
they could speak to him and he could get some
professional help. However, thing's backfired, with the husband, of course,
threatening her before she went to the authorities.

Speaker 1 (30:44):
Oh if she ends up dead, well well I don't know.

Speaker 5 (30:48):
But for this specific one, we've talked about the R
word kinks. We've talked about kidnapping kinks. I've also played
this with my ex in terms of the R word.
For the sex tip this week, I wanted to ask
you and both of us can do this together, Ay,
what would be a sex tip to communicate to your

(31:09):
partner that you can't help but judge them for their
kink and also, though you want to please your partner,
if you're uninterested in their kink.

Speaker 1 (31:20):
What should you do.

Speaker 5 (31:21):
So, I think that we've opened up the dialogue to
have people want to try a whole bunch of new things.
And clearly, as you're with somebody, maybe they're kinks and
fetishes change over time. How would you communicate a partner
coming to you with a kink that actually makes you uncomfortable,
especially because she did say she played.

Speaker 1 (31:40):
Into the kink a few times.

Speaker 3 (31:42):
So I think that the scary thing about this because
with mine, with the butter NIGHTE situation, I told him
I want this, okay, well, I want you to scare.
I told him I wanted to feel scared. I want
to like you know, it was a feeling that you wanted.

Speaker 1 (31:54):
Yeah, okay.

Speaker 3 (31:56):
With this specifically, I'm trying to think what would I say,
because I would definitely offer a suggestion, like, for example,
someone told me they wanted me to play dead nick kink,
I'd be like, that makes me feel really unsafe, but
I would do a pillow princess thing.

Speaker 1 (32:12):
Okay, but hello, hello.

Speaker 5 (32:16):
It's weird because I remember role playing where I specifically
wanted to be so intoxicated that I consented prior and
told him I'm going to act like I can't consent
h And so though I was so intoxicated, I wasn't lifeless,

(32:37):
but I absolutely was like acting so inebriated that you know.

Speaker 1 (32:41):
And now I like to be woken up with Dick
like I like to be faked. Well that too.

Speaker 5 (32:45):
And again, if he's saying that this is his kink,
you would say that you would just flat out say
this makes me uncomfortable and I can't do this for you.

Speaker 3 (32:54):
If if for the one that she's talking about to
play dead, I don't like.

Speaker 5 (32:58):
That, okay, because so let's not What about something else
that makes you uncomfortable like scatt maybe Okay, then I
would probably offer pe.

Speaker 1 (33:08):
So you would just offer something to kind of compromise.

Speaker 3 (33:10):
So like I do think there's a compromise in everything.
For example, like my fantasy would be two guys, right.

Speaker 1 (33:18):
But you're done.

Speaker 3 (33:19):
I know I ain't gonna beat but I've definitely had
the dirty talk of it. Oh yeah, I've had the
fingers in my mouth like you wish another digues in
your mouth like I've had that. Yeah, And so I
think that there's things of like compromise with everything, and
I never want my own desires. Excuse me, let me
say that my boundaries to be violated. Like I'm my

(33:42):
year of no bro right. I love saying though it's
my favorite thing. I think I say it a lot
for work. Me to say it a lot for so
you beget a lot of notes form me. You want
to grab a drink? No, you know, like you want
to record this? No, I say no to you too.

Speaker 5 (33:56):
Ye saying no to each other and I think like
it's a lot of cows over you. No no, no
no is such a It's something we are scared to say.

Speaker 1 (34:05):
And I'm so glad that we are both comfortable.

Speaker 5 (34:07):
I thought you were trying to give you a high five.
No yea for me, I'll be honest with you. I
think this is the thing when it comes to kinks, fetishes,
or how you and your partner have chemistry in the bedroom,
it's really important for you to also come to the
realization that this may not be your person.

Speaker 1 (34:26):
I think that calling the cops is a.

Speaker 5 (34:28):
Lot and unless you know that Nigga be going to
the cemetery to smoke some blunts and maybe that Nigga
lent no no, no no, I get that, but that's
that's outside of the bedroom. That's outside of the bedroom.
I'm talking about this.

Speaker 3 (34:44):
If a man has been violent with you and then
when you as fuck, he wants you to play dad bitch,
that go to Gaelpaho, Okay, I'm scared. I I don't
want me to play daddy. He wasn't cussing me out
and hitting me. Maybe I'd be like this, ain't that scary?

Speaker 1 (35:00):
Oh? You telling me you get bothered.

Speaker 5 (35:01):
With me and then we want me to be angry
and aggressive. That doesn't say that he's been beating her ass.
So to me, though, that's where I'm taking that out
of the bedroom. It's not It doesn't say that he's
been doing that in the bedroom. So to me, that's
where we're separating our desires and the behaviors in the bedroom.

(35:22):
Clearly a relationship you shouldn't be with a man who
you feel.

Speaker 1 (35:25):
Unsafe with period. We talked about the same.

Speaker 5 (35:27):
Yeah, but to me, this is literally leaning into the
kink because our minds go crazy. There's bondage. But you
just had a butt of night to your throat crazy.
Iw I ain't here for it. Like I've got conversations
with men who were like, you can't say, I that's
it ain't for me y'all could do it. And if
a man came to me ew my yam. Okay, yuck,

(35:49):
it's yuck, my yam. But you ew though that's what
I'm saying, you didn't say yuh. Well, because I don't
like blood. I don't want you to act like you
about to stab me. I talked about my Okay, what.

Speaker 3 (35:57):
It wasn't periods sex, bitch, because I'm gonna tell you
right now we don't have our salt for a moment.

Speaker 5 (36:01):
But well, I'll say that there was someone that I
was once interested in having sex with, and as soon
as he let me know that his kink was knife,
plate and blood, you have go find you a partner
for that. I literally was not interested because A that's
my boundary. I can't fulfill you. But I'm also not
gonna have sex knowing that I'm not gonna fulfill you.

Speaker 3 (36:22):
And also, like to be fair, if the knife play
was him actually wanting to see blood and it wasn't
like this fantasy play.

Speaker 1 (36:27):
Would that have been different for you? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (36:29):
Okay, because to me, we're in this uh, I'm blind.
Photo's just pretend land seeing the blood, the slicing.

Speaker 1 (36:36):
I don't. I can't do that, okay.

Speaker 5 (36:38):
So basically your suggestion, though overall, would be if you
don't feel safe with this person, if you can't please
this person, leave this person.

Speaker 1 (36:48):
No I think that. Okay, that's not true. That was
my advice. I said, leave them.

Speaker 5 (36:53):
If this thiga got a cake, that make me uncomfortable
so much so that I'm judging you and thinking to
call the police because I think you need.

Speaker 1 (36:59):
Professional Oh, I'm gonna leave you. Why can't we just
not do that part of sex? Though?

Speaker 5 (37:05):
Boom, you have a look. I'm like you like to peg,
So if you can't peg a nigga, he's supposed.

Speaker 1 (37:13):
To leave you.

Speaker 5 (37:13):
Well. No, To be very clear, then he was open
knowing that that was my kink and he was not interested.

Speaker 1 (37:19):
But if it was a hard no, you would have
left him. He would no, no, no. But his compromise was
to allow me to do it to someone else.

Speaker 5 (37:26):
So if if you don't have the wherewithal to let
your partner go enjoy this kink with someone else, that's
a whole different. I assume this to be a monogamous relationship.
Pegging was a hard note for my ex, but he
was open to allowing me to do it.

Speaker 1 (37:42):
With someone else.

Speaker 5 (37:44):
So it's not like I was kept from my from
my kink or my pleasure at all. There wasn't a
boundary put on what I wanted to enjoy with this.
It sounds like, bitch, I gave you a little bit now, and.

Speaker 1 (37:57):
That's okay for there to be boundaries.

Speaker 3 (37:58):
Maybe you just did not have anything as crazy, and
I agree this, there's boundary.

Speaker 1 (38:02):
Can I take over your horder with my foot job?
That shit was really fun?

Speaker 5 (38:08):
Look at you wanting to bleed into my outline. No,
you should have followed your own outline. I want to
get into the horrible decision. All right, we don't have
to talk about my foot job. Good, all right, we'll
save it for another episode. We're gonna get in to
the horrible decision because.

Speaker 1 (38:23):
Maybe, yeah, the niggas that want to pay for feet,
they are in here. Pete. I want to you having
a man in lifting your legs this many times? Babe?
You trying to show plus to the YouTube.

Speaker 3 (38:36):
I did see something recently that was like, if you
got a nigga, how many thirst traps can you do?

Speaker 1 (38:40):
And I was like, wait, I was who said it?

Speaker 3 (38:42):
It was conversation with Zoh and he like, sent me something,
and he'll send me some of the clips. But I
saw like, are thirst traps allowed if you're taking first off?

Speaker 1 (38:49):
If you find everything a thirst? Hello, bitch.

Speaker 3 (38:55):
Gonna be like he controlled niggas being hungry. I really
be at the beach, babe, They're going to be starving
for me.

Speaker 5 (39:01):
I could literally have my face beat it be a
selfie and my lips look like it could wrap around.

Speaker 1 (39:05):
They dick. I can't help that. They won't it. These
lisps be looking volumptuous way and do your petty lives
for drama. Don't see the thing is you have to
do that. You better calm the fuck down.

Speaker 5 (39:21):
You see what I mean? You see why I can't
take her serious breath? And look everybody laughing? Why y'all laughing?
I don't like seeing all his teeth in the background producers.

Speaker 1 (39:34):
Honestly, it's just honestly shot the bro I'm gonna tell you.

Speaker 5 (39:38):
It's only funny because I feel like I'm not keeping
up enough.

Speaker 1 (39:43):
So whenever someone else told me better, I'm be like,
what what do you mean?

Speaker 4 (39:49):
Me?

Speaker 1 (39:49):
Want to call me and to be like, hey, how's
the weather, just so she can tell me. Sometimes I
don't even be doing that. But I love other people'
dramas the crazy thing, but.

Speaker 5 (39:56):
I don't be when I tell you I don't have drama.
That's why I watch, you know, drama. I don't know
what y'all talking about. I ain't got no drama. This
is why I like reality TV. I'd be like, ooh,
they lives. There's so much more drama food than mine.

Speaker 1 (40:09):
I ain't got no drama. What is this noise you're making?
That drama is subjective and I ain't got a bitch.

Speaker 5 (40:17):
You literally just say I really going on the internet
drama that was a couple of weeks ago. If we anyway,
we're not gonna do this. I ain't got no drama
because you know what's crazy. I don't think about nobody,
So no more pain. You kind of look like her
to with his little outfit. You could be on stage.

Speaker 1 (40:38):
Somehow like Mary. Don't do this.

Speaker 5 (40:40):
You look like the boots and is First off, sorry,
first off, these boots ain't high enough to be married.

Speaker 1 (40:45):
That's true. They gotta go above my knee.

Speaker 5 (40:47):
But you can figure it out, all right, speaking of
you might be able to pitch your little foot job thing.

Speaker 1 (40:53):
No, I'm not that. No, you might be able to No, Okay,
that's fine. Put up bread brendon, y'all. Make sure you
get your tickets now.

Speaker 5 (41:07):
May fifth, we are at the Earth Theater in London's
and we made this a specific request to be in
London on the weekend so that are are all of
our euro people can come and see this.

Speaker 1 (41:19):
We want our whole Europe.

Speaker 5 (41:22):
And Europe pull whatever, all the black people that live
over there, just take that another fucking Eurostar and come
and see us.

Speaker 3 (41:29):
We're gonna be there May fifth. We are having a
whole new show, one that you didn't see. This is
a part of the Climax tour. So even if you
were on the Climax Tour and you need a little trip,
it's gonna be warmer, it's gonna be fun.

Speaker 1 (41:38):
Come through and see ag that's right.

Speaker 5 (41:41):
Make sure you head on over to hohrehive dot com
and get your tickets now. So for the horrible decision
this week, I want to lean into being touch starved,
which I've been talking about a lot. I talked about
it on Patreon like a month ago. Oh shit, sorry,
not the bird. It was like gonna be through a
a banana which you haven't sent me. I don't appreciate.

(42:02):
Calm down, Calm down, we gonna giddy, We gonna giddy.
Uh So, being touchstarved is also something I'm dealing with,
not only in therapy, but this podcast and where the
fuck I am in my fucking life.

Speaker 4 (42:14):
And.

Speaker 5 (42:16):
Oh my god, it's giving I changed because if y'all
go back to the fucking beginning of this podcast, I
talk about fucking niggas, did not kissing them, fucking.

Speaker 1 (42:26):
Niggas, ad not cuddling, doing all.

Speaker 5 (42:28):
Of those things, And since my relationship, that's been something
I now realize I am completely yearning. It ain't even dick,
even though I got the one nigga, which hopefully I
get my round three, But I don't crave at all

(42:49):
sex as much as I realize. I'm crying to my
therapist saying that I want to cuddle, that I want
to hug, that I want someone to massage me, and
not one that I pay for, but one that's a
little bit more intimate. I think we talked about on
our Patreon that I found intimacy and watching a TV
show with somebody and how much I missed that, and

(43:12):
so I don't I could say it's getting older. But
the things that I crave now from a man is
so different than just the sexual desire to be with one.
It's feeling respected, it's feeling cared for, it's feeling loved,
it's feeling protected, it's feeling safe, all those things, And
I realized that a lot of those things come with

(43:33):
intimacy and everything that has nothing to do with actual
dick and pussy. No vagina, no nothing. That's why I said,
maybe you get to talk about your foot job, because
maybe that's intimate. Maybe that don't count of sex. But
job sound like a job, not really sick well to me. Actually,
this is something interesting. The foot job, which I won't go.

Speaker 3 (43:53):
Into detail with us because I stopped trying, was how
sex was about to start. And then we were both like,
maybe we shouldn't come, Maybe we should hold it for
our vacation. Like we're gonna be on vacation for a week,
we're gonna be ten days as long. That's the longest.
The longest we've been together was a week. And he
literally was like, bitch, you don't annoy me.

Speaker 1 (44:12):
This is crazy. He don't call me bitch, but that's
really my day. But Yeah, we have to go between
LA to Hawaii back to LA leaving from New York.
It's a lot. So we talked about holding it.

Speaker 3 (44:21):
He was like, yo, people go there for their honeymoon, Like,
let's fucking hold this calm girl was crazy, literally like
my foot.

Speaker 1 (44:27):
I thought his dick was gonna break, that's how heart
he was.

Speaker 3 (44:29):
But say all that to say, I realized how intense
the intimacy gets when you aren't having sex. We went
to d C a few weeks ago. I met some
of the whore Hive. They were great. Shout out to Marjorie.
I hope that's her name at the lysle Long story short,
we had a forty five hour make forty five minute

(44:51):
makeout session and he told me he thought it was
the best sex we ever had, And I was like, really,
He's like, yo, it was such a build up for
me touching you, looking at you, kissing you, talking to you,
listening to the music in the bacts Like, it was
so much of a build And I think that type
of shit when you don't have sex, it's like it
almost makes the sex not that big a deal.

Speaker 1 (45:12):
Right, You definitely need a cuddle, buddy, girl.

Speaker 5 (45:15):
It's so crazy because the word need is something I'm
battling with now because of all the trauma associated. We
can need touch, and I realize, though I do I
need it, why don't you just do it with a woman? Well,
so can I tell you? Oh my god, I hate
that you brought that up because I was just in
my fucking therapy. It's a sair when I tell you,

(45:37):
I absolutely love and adore my friends. They've been now
joining me on tour. They've been like, bitch, what city
we go into next? Because I get to fly people
in now and shit has camped and I feel like
I'm on tour with my friends and I love it.
I'm in a space where I realize love my homegirls
to death, love intimately or not intimately, love fucking women.

Speaker 1 (46:02):
I have zero desire to date.

Speaker 5 (46:04):
Women, not dating man, no even being intimate, Like, oh,
I don't want that with a woman. I enjoy eating
slim pussy, rubin on a titty, kissing you with a
man in the I sparke cuddling friends before. Yeah, but
that's an I still want a man right now. I
want that from a man.

Speaker 3 (46:20):
So I was going to make a comment about the
touch starve Yes, but I think you may need to
try out to just surprise yourself. The dude I was
dating two years ago, Dreamville dude, he said to me
during the pandemic, he was.

Speaker 1 (46:35):
So stuck to his computer.

Speaker 3 (46:36):
The company we worked for is when we were all
participating in during the pandemic.

Speaker 1 (46:40):
I feel like you don't have to give any more details.

Speaker 3 (46:43):
No, no, no, I was just going to say, I feel
like there wasn't a person that didn't almost crash this company,
right because of how much And he said, I didn't
get to leave my computer and I went to get
a stretch, and he was like, I didn't even realize
the person that touched me, like how much my body
felt full, like I needed to be touched. I think there,

(47:03):
it's easier said than done because you're associating all of
that with a person that you love in a romantic way.
Some touch can happen, bro, and I think you should
explore it. And I think with try just try to
survive yourself with central massages, with maybe some.

Speaker 1 (47:18):
Cuddling with people that you know you won't fuck.

Speaker 3 (47:22):
Just that touch point, Like it's like when you hug
someone that really needs a hug, like you don't realize
you need a hug until you get one.

Speaker 5 (47:28):
So that's the thing. I don't want to pay for
a massage, I know. Oh and it's open now, so
he back on the schedule of my to go see him.
But oh, bitch, flood iron baby is open. Uh huh,
don't be looking. Don't say, don't be going to get
a masta. Oh Ben should fiel his massages? Oh yeah, yeah,

(47:51):
let me bish when he put my leg up, baby.
But even that, I realized that I want someone to
spend the night. Oh like, I want the intimacy of
those things without of course without sex, but I don't
want to have to pay for it. You know, I
ain't paying for Dick. I don't want to pay for
Enemacy is a goddamn it. I just want somebody that

(48:11):
I actually like to be around me, to cuddle, to
lay up with, to fucking enjoy.

Speaker 1 (48:17):
And that's it.

Speaker 5 (48:18):
So being touch starved is where I'm just like, damn,
I actually do need a person before we get to
homell because I wanted to. I wanted to share with
you guys the potential effects of a woman who is
touch starved. And I mean it could be you could
become a murderer. But I wanted to go through these

(48:40):
things because where we may feel like we don't need
a partner, we don't need nobody, especially in this modern
woman era of super independency and codependency being such a
bad word associated with relationships. I realize how much I
need intimacy from someone that I'm not only attracted to,

(49:03):
but someone that I feel safe with. So it's not
a stranger, it's somebody that I genuinely like to be around,
which is hard because you niggas be a niggas. Anyways,
Things in which can be affected if you are not
getting intimacy. The first one is low self esteem, loneliness,
a lack of emotional connection. This one might be why

(49:25):
the fuck I will celibate, decreased libido, increased stress, which
that's not surprising. My word that I'm also working through
in therapy right now, Resentment, a communication gap of course, infidelity,

(49:45):
a negative body image, and for those of you in
a relationship or in a marriage, this is actually where
I know we talk about fucking money. A lack of
physical intimacy is one of the leading causes of divorce,
and of course it's because it leads to not only resentment,
but sometimes in fidelity sometimes because that's a real connection, right,

(50:07):
and it's needed as human beings. Okay, hey Jesus Mohammad Allah,
I don't know all the love you hate it.

Speaker 1 (50:15):
I don't know why, you know.

Speaker 5 (50:16):
I'm mad that it got wired that way because now
I'm dependent on another human being for this, Like what
aliens that bring them? Damn bitch, I'm waiting. But we'dn't
been wired this way by our creator to actually need
someone else. And in my super independence as a woman
and a part of me that actually felt strong and

(50:37):
saying I don't need no man a, I'm like, fuck,
I really fucking need this person to make me feel
this way. And it has so many connections, so so
many other things.

Speaker 3 (50:51):
I'm gonna say this because I think you and a
lot of people need to hear it. Saying you need
connection is okay and very healthy. That's why we, you know,
replace friendships sometimes a partners. Like maybe you're watching a
show or a movie with a friend because you're single
right now, or you're taking trips with a friend because
you're single right now, like just because you need Like
it's just we have to live our lives. And do,

(51:15):
and I think that is the thing that we're not doing.
At least I could speak for myself because I was
becoming so angry with my ex for the reason that
I was single, that I couldn't just enjoy anymore. And
like the openness I had for people was so close
because I was so mad. That is the final phase

(51:36):
of grieving in a breakup. I think, Okay, it's like
my self worth. I'm not really speaking about you, but me.
My self worth was becoming so attached to him and
me thinking you talked about a friend that said they
couldn't be around you because they were you know, uh,
partnered or whatever, And like for me, I had felt
that I wasn't feeling worthy because this person was gone,

(52:00):
which is crazy because when we see single women we
kind of pity them. Not we society pities them. She
could have left a terrible person, right, you know, there's
so much power in that antally unhappy people are we
seeing in relationships. I was unhappy at the end, not
for the full part of my relationship or even even
more than half of my relationship was great, but I think.

Speaker 1 (52:19):
That like.

Speaker 3 (52:21):
The weight of the word need makes people feel like
they're giving up their own power, but it's okay. Like
living your life until it happens is the number one priority.
I literally wrote in this book yesterday or journal, excuse me, yesterday,
I was reading some of the things with the person
that I'm dating, how happy and how I couldn't believe

(52:44):
what was happening to me was like I really had
just focused so much on my own personal joy day
to day instead of being angry. Literally, I mean maybe
the first eight things I wrote about I want someone alternative.
I talked about wanting someone that looked like Lenny Kravitz,
wro wrote it down it was crazy. And then the
one of the final things I wrote was a man
that makes me feel so sure of my place in

(53:04):
their life. And on the next page I wrote about
the things that I wanted for myself and that what
it's tired of myself doing. And the thing that I
wrote was, I'm so tired of feeling like it's my fault,
like I get chosen over. I get so tired of
feeling like I made a choice in my life that's
keeping me from a partner.

Speaker 1 (53:25):
And I used to think, not horrible podcast. I was
about to say not horrible, but just.

Speaker 3 (53:29):
Like my freedom, my personality supersedes horrible. Right, I've always
been this girl. Yep, before I had a podcast, I
might talk about sex and with everybody. Right, that used
to scare me and like, ooh, is that why people
don't want to end up dating me?

Speaker 5 (53:43):
Bro?

Speaker 3 (53:44):
We are exactly where we're supposed to be, and the
people we meet celebrate that, and they'll match that and
make that feel that energy feel increased and like purposeful.

Speaker 1 (53:53):
So like it's really about knowing that you're in the
right place. Bro.

Speaker 3 (53:58):
Timing is everything, Like it's so everything. You're gonna meet
a nigga because it's just happening to me right now.

Speaker 1 (54:06):
This is count number like sixteen, what for the N word?

Speaker 3 (54:12):
We both send each other a concert that we wanted
to go to. It's elsewhere, Like same time. He was like, yo,
you really like mine and I was like, bruh, I
can't believe I met you right now? What if I
met you two years ago and you're with your ex
and I couldn't have you and I realize like, oh,
we're meeting people that say, oll day meeting the person
he's with. What if you met that bitch a month before?

(54:34):
Right or he couldn't have been with her, He wasn't
ready to be with her. He went through therapy, like
we are so much in timing, Like the people were
supposed to be with they're going through their face. You're
going through therapy for when Nigga that you end up
meeting seventeen count seventeen, he may like he may count
you just said I said sixteen times.

Speaker 1 (54:52):
Oh okay, okay, nigga.

Speaker 3 (54:54):
He might really dislike equality that you are working through.
If you met him today, you would he would not
be able to be with you.

Speaker 1 (55:02):
I mean, you know what I told you. That's why
I'm revisiting uh oh oh from okay.

Speaker 3 (55:10):
But that's what I'm saying right Like the person that
you're looking for, there may be something they need to
get over. There may be maturity levels they need to reach.
Like I really have a strong belief that like there's
a divinity and timing and I just believe that you're
not our love but my life.

Speaker 1 (55:23):
Can I ask you?

Speaker 5 (55:24):
Then maybe you're a lot more emotional than me, So
I feel like you need a guy way more than you. No, No,
when I say emotional in regards to your ability to
hop in and out relationships with people that you feel
safe and comfortable and move forward with. And I ask
you this because in terms of intimacy, how do you

(55:44):
find or request this? So this is my issue right now.
So I got the little nigga that you know y'all
saw each other at that event at one time, you know, the.

Speaker 1 (55:52):
One I told you. So, I have.

Speaker 5 (56:00):
Mitch, the one I just sucked his dick and didn't
get oh, okay him okay. So even with him, right,
we know that we have this. It's not a relationship.
We have casual sex and we enjoy each other. We
talk damn there every day, but it doesn't go beyond
us talking about how we can't wait to fuck each

(56:22):
other the next time we see each other. So, because
it's so casual, before we wrap out of here, this
is my home mail and I would like your advice
on it. I am having casual sex with somebody while
also craving intimacy. This person I do not want to
be with, but this person I truly enjoy being with

(56:42):
when we're together. However him yes, However, in the times
that we're together, and we talked about it all have
my own rooms sometimes all the time, and we kind
of enjoy what we've already created. However, I need fucking intimacy.

(57:04):
How do I communicate to someone who I've already created
a casual sex relationship with that I might want us
to stay in the same room and cuddle, that I
might want to wake up next to him, that I
might want kisses on my forehead, and that I don't
really want much else but in the time that we're together,
because it it literally were never together, like we'll be

(57:25):
together for like two days straight. How do I request
intimacy from a casual sex.

Speaker 1 (57:30):
Is such a home mail question. I'm sure a lot of.

Speaker 5 (57:32):
People I know, I know, and and by the way,
we have men in the room. So intimacy with a
casual sex partner. If any of y'all have any advice,
please come to the mic.

Speaker 1 (57:44):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (57:45):
So this is an interesting thing because this was a
topic that came up in my relationship because when I'm
away and I'm in LA and you know, something may
happen with him and someone else. That was actually one
of my hard nos. Oh no sleepovers, know this, know that.
And he was like, yo, like I know what you're saying.
He's like, not that he didn't agree He's like, I
don't really date like women that are like bottom tier

(58:07):
of bitches, like these girls definitely are used to men
being able to give them a little bit more.

Speaker 1 (58:14):
I can't run through one of these day I can
get more like it. But I think he meant.

Speaker 3 (58:17):
More like, I can't just run like when you're a
girl of I hate to be like Kevin samuelsy, but
like a certain stature of status or whatever, like you
can't run through a bitch and dump and dub her
like right Like He's like, yo, I might have to
do a little song and dance here with this bitch.
And he's like understanding certain things. I'm like, well, I
don't really care. This is my thing right now.

Speaker 5 (58:36):
She just called me a bottom tier bitch, which is crazy,
but I'm ana keep talking.

Speaker 1 (58:39):
No you, no niggas, don't just run through you. Mandy,
the nigga flew your mouse. But that's what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 (58:44):
I can get the first class, first off, with no question.
I get the first class. I get the room with
the rits I get. I'm talking about a girl that'll
be so desperate for dick they just let you do anything.

Speaker 1 (58:55):
But that's the thing, and maybe it's treat you any time.
Maybe it's a love language thing.

Speaker 5 (58:59):
I'm telling you the first plus the gifts, the treatment,
the games, like all of that means nothing because bitch,
I want you to rub my forehead.

Speaker 3 (59:07):
Right, And I understand because that's a real thing, right,
even for me, like when dating other people, like I'm
sure that nigga don't like when they can take me
to you know what I mean? But anyway I would
say you need to I don't know. I'll tell you
what I think you should do in this situation, but
I'll tell you what you need to moving forward. Okay,
stop being the cool girl. Okay, you are.

Speaker 1 (59:30):
I don't want to be much more with him.

Speaker 3 (59:31):
Hold on, you're being the cool girl to where guys
feel so comfortable that they don't feel like you have
an issue with this because you're cool, okay, and that
and that friendship that you build and that cool girl
connection kind of, he don't think he's mistreating you at all, right,
you don't, of course he doesn't, because you're the cool girl.

(59:53):
I'm not really scared to be vulnerable. Your vulnerability has
been an issue for you. It's your safeguard for your heart, right,
I don't give a fuck, and so it.

Speaker 1 (01:00:04):
Looks like a crying, whiny bitch.

Speaker 5 (01:00:06):
I don't think it's crying your whiny because you're not
about to be crying winey when you when you say
what I think you should say?

Speaker 1 (01:00:11):
Okay, what should I say? We've been fucking for a minute,
and while.

Speaker 3 (01:00:15):
I say where we're at, I'm at the point where
I need a fake boyfriend when we're around each other.
Need you to be my little fake man. I'm hungry,
I need to watch a show. I need a little
kiss her too. I don't really think my pussy can
get his wet if I don't got a fake boyfriend.
Not a fake boyfriend, and you let him know exactly
what you need. The fake boyfriend is one a cool

(01:00:35):
girl joke. It's not being like I need intimacy and
I need my hair stroked.

Speaker 1 (01:00:40):
And you don't have to go there. You can make
it very light to where he'll understand. Can I ask you, Wolf,
that was good?

Speaker 5 (01:00:47):
You wouldn't be thrown off or felt like a girl
was lying like she wanted more.

Speaker 1 (01:00:52):
But she's gonna joke about the fake boyfriend need, it's
definitely gonna pop in my mind.

Speaker 6 (01:00:57):
But if I can believe that you can really stay
with it and it's not going to bleed over it
and be complicated.

Speaker 1 (01:01:02):
And I think he trusts me my ability.

Speaker 3 (01:01:04):
And also wait, wait, wait saying remember hold on before
you talk at it. I said, I understand where we're
at and that we aren't pursuing more.

Speaker 1 (01:01:14):
That's how you started, how I started. Okay, I feel
like that's such a trap.

Speaker 5 (01:01:19):
It's a trap because do you feel like as as
women and maybe most men, once you include the intimacy
that a woman does.

Speaker 7 (01:01:27):
Start just yeah, it's like fantasizing, like I know, romanticizing. Okay, romanticizing.
That's kind of like, at least on my side where
I've grown as a lover or I guess a partner.
I try not to even make that a possible belief.

Speaker 1 (01:01:41):
That's my thing.

Speaker 3 (01:01:42):
I think that we need to be very clear though
in that Mandy, it's tired of the transaction.

Speaker 1 (01:01:48):
Yeah, so don't use that word either. I'm in therapy
right now.

Speaker 3 (01:01:51):
No, but that's that is a word you should be using.
Like it's a little too transactional for me, right?

Speaker 1 (01:01:56):
Are you not even paying me?

Speaker 5 (01:01:57):
I want to see him, he wants to see me
doesn't money, right, it's an exchange.

Speaker 1 (01:02:01):
But I'm not fully getting what I want.

Speaker 5 (01:02:03):
But here's this is why I ask for the men
listening a woman comes to you and it's like, I
enjoy just fucking you, but I want the boyfriend girlfriend
treatment does with that scare either together.

Speaker 3 (01:02:16):
When you're together, it's not even like you're asking him
to check on you on how your day was, if
are you feeling good?

Speaker 1 (01:02:21):
You want me to send your soup? No, when doing that,
I'm just saying like, I don't think you're asking for a.

Speaker 5 (01:02:28):
Lot, you know, Okay, So as men me asking for
us to maybe be in the same room, the cuddling,
that's not asking for a lot. I love it all
on Wolf look a little talking to the mic like.

Speaker 1 (01:02:41):
You know how to buy.

Speaker 6 (01:02:41):
You can be committed to it if you can be
honest about it, because the real truth is people who
they positions in relationships and who positions Yeah, so if
you can stay committed to it and really make deliver.

Speaker 5 (01:02:52):
On that and just be like, nigga, you only gonna
be my boyfriend but thirty six hours because he wants
it to to be honest.

Speaker 1 (01:02:58):
I wants it to that transactional shit for niggas.

Speaker 3 (01:03:00):
It's tough, and I even think a lot of men
can compartmentalize.

Speaker 5 (01:03:04):
I can't, right, but now you surpride myself as a
woman of being able to compartmental and you probably are
driving me.

Speaker 1 (01:03:11):
I do think you need to say it on the phone, Okay.

Speaker 5 (01:03:14):
I mean we talk every day, oh every single day.

Speaker 1 (01:03:19):
Oh but like, hold on, we've been talking. Kid.

Speaker 5 (01:03:21):
He be posting his little outfits and I'd be like, damn,
you look good, but that'll be like our conversation.

Speaker 1 (01:03:26):
I think you're correctly when I say I talk to
him every day. I just be letting him know he
looks good.

Speaker 5 (01:03:30):
He'll let me know I look good, or we talk
about there's a touch point, yeah no, or we both
get drunk and I'll wake up and I'm like, nigga,
why did you hit me at four a m.

Speaker 1 (01:03:37):
We're not even in the same city, and.

Speaker 5 (01:03:38):
He'd be let I got lit last night and I
was thinking about what we like.

Speaker 1 (01:03:42):
So we we've been doing a little bit.

Speaker 3 (01:03:44):
Honestly, and I think he's gonna receive this badly, Okay,
like you, that's a lot of talking. He's even super cash,
like very cash, so I think, yeah, I think get
on the phone.

Speaker 1 (01:03:55):
So can I be honest? You've never talked on the phone.

Speaker 5 (01:03:59):
We don't talk on the phone until I'm like landed.
Uh see soon we only talking. We don't talk on
the phone. We text, but I'm not a phone person.
I talk only until eleven am. I don't talk on
the phone with nobody. All of my friends on I
don't talk.

Speaker 3 (01:04:13):
You have this conversation on the phone, and okay, either
it's a glass of wine. Either late night we maybe
call him and you know, tease it a little bit
so it doesn't feel super heavy.

Speaker 1 (01:04:22):
But I think fake boyfriend's a fun way to say it.

Speaker 3 (01:04:25):
And then even if you want to be honest and
be like yo, I just don't have that many partners
right now, niggas, So I can't just pull up on
you to suck dick and leave, like make it.

Speaker 1 (01:04:32):
I would even make a job like I ain't getting paid.

Speaker 5 (01:04:34):
I like being around you, be like hanging no, because
then he might just offer me money.

Speaker 1 (01:04:37):
Look at you. I hate bad advice. I like what
you said. She was doing good. Goddamn I was joking.
But anyways, guys, I guess you might take that serious.

Speaker 5 (01:04:46):
Jesus and he might be like, well, what you need, bitch,
and just might pay me? And now I don't get
into bitch. No, okay, this is dick.

Speaker 1 (01:04:53):
I want for free. God damn it be fine.

Speaker 5 (01:04:56):
Anyways, y'all, thank y'all for tuning in to another episode.
If y'all to support us more and get more episodes
like this, we're Risolla shooting the shit, talking the shit,
join us over on our Patreon that is patreon dot
com backslash Horrible Decisions. I don't like that you just
did that, bitch. Anyways, make sure you subscribe. Make sure

(01:05:17):
you also follow us on social media to see where
you could see us live in a city.

Speaker 1 (01:05:21):
Near Hurry up, I gotta bee all right, this has
been yet another episode of horrible decisions.

Speaker 5 (01:05:26):
Bye, hey guys. We are part of the second annual
Block Effect Festival in Atlanta, Georgire.

Speaker 3 (01:05:35):
It's gonna be a wild and brand new show that
you didn't see last year. We're so excited to be
back with our atl family and our blacktech family.

Speaker 1 (01:05:42):
That's right.

Speaker 5 (01:05:43):
So the date is Saturday, April the twenty seventh. Make
sure you head on over to block effect dot com
and get your tickets.

Speaker 1 (01:05:50):
Now, see that once in a blue some in home zooms.

Speaker 5 (01:05:55):
So I mean I've been honestly, and you do this
a lot. We are never gonna please everybody.

Speaker 2 (01:06:01):
Some niggas is.

Speaker 5 (01:06:02):
Like so happy, like they feel like it's content that's
back in the studio, and others.

Speaker 2 (01:06:08):
Are gonna want home.

Speaker 5 (01:06:09):
When I tell you, I'll be reading them comments and
maybe I just know we're not gonna please.

Speaker 2 (01:06:13):
All of y'all for nothing.

Speaker 3 (01:06:14):
Behind if people like you, know, I get that you
get to have a peek in because we would never
never get to do real.

Speaker 5 (01:06:20):
Episodes like at Home or anything like that was COVID,
so you kind of feel like you got a peak
or something a little different. I can get the allure
to it, Like I haven't really paid for bonus content
in a minute, but when I did, I did enjoy
feeling like I had something that you wouldn't give the
regular public. So if that doesn't work, then we'll just
start doing nuts. You will start doing news vide you.

(01:06:44):
I did also want to apologize to some of the patrons.

Speaker 2 (01:06:48):
Bitch don't know what happened to the town hall.

Speaker 5 (01:06:50):
So for the one hundred and fifty four people that
were in there this month, congratulations se.

Speaker 2 (01:06:57):
Y'all for being able to join us. You got some
tea a whole budget seat, babe.

Speaker 5 (01:07:01):
When I tell you, I was looking everywhere, and I've
been recording, like first off, been using zoom. We've been
doing town halls now for years. Never locked like one.
Just it just didn't show up anywhere. I looked on
my laptop, my desktop. I asked you to look.

Speaker 2 (01:07:16):
I even shout out to Barry.

Speaker 5 (01:07:18):
Barry did some research and was trying to like see
where it could be. So he was helping me, and
I was like, bro, I can't find this shit fucking anywhere, and.

Speaker 2 (01:07:27):
So not mind you.

Speaker 5 (01:07:28):
When we were done, it said it was loading. Not
sure where the fucking went. Maybe our zoom updated in
the middle. Nonetheless, y'all will be getting this bonus episode
this week. But we don't have to react to anything again.
If y'all were on the town hall, y'all on the
townof you weren't you weren't. I got Easter just passed,
so you wanna. I mean, it's April Fools today and

(01:07:51):
I took a pregnancy test and it's negative, and that
I want to say last year on April Fools, you
did too. This is like becoming a recurring thing.

Speaker 1 (01:07:58):
No, no, no, there's no way.

Speaker 5 (01:07:59):
But Lamball was the that was two years I thought
that was I thought that was that Angel cool though.

Speaker 2 (01:08:06):
The April fool episode, Oh they're plan B one. No,
that was the New Year's episode.

Speaker 5 (01:08:12):
The pregnancy test though, I swear you came in here
and did that on an April Fools before.

Speaker 1 (01:08:18):
I can't. Maybe I was joking, but no, I really
took one this morning.

Speaker 5 (01:08:22):
Bro, When I tell you, I've been feeling so sluggish,
I don't know what I got. I just feel like
that's not be concalled just talking about don't know what
I got. I feel like I can't I don't feel sick.
I just feel like I can't do anything because I
don't think we six feet away.

Speaker 1 (01:08:35):
But I think my body's run down. Some travel like
that's a real thing.

Speaker 2 (01:08:38):
Oh yeah, No, I've been traveling every week. And if
y'all are.

Speaker 5 (01:08:43):
Watching war J Cole today, because I will be at
dream Bell and Bitch I met as fuck and listen,
I'm gonna tell you all about my little hypocrisy.

Speaker 1 (01:08:51):
Right.

Speaker 5 (01:08:52):
Woke up this morning, was hoping it was an April
Fool's joke. It's not Chris Brown will no longer be
a dream bill and they replaced him with fucking fifty.

Speaker 3 (01:09:00):
And I just don't understand who didn't Usher was a
replacement for someone else last year?

Speaker 2 (01:09:07):
Right?

Speaker 5 (01:09:07):
No?

Speaker 2 (01:09:07):
I think it was Usher and Drake. They were always
that like about Coachella.

Speaker 5 (01:09:10):
Here, no there, there's always some sort of replacements going on.
Let me tell you what they did. So they replaced
Chris Brown would fit the scent, and they replaced money
Law one Hunt show.

Speaker 2 (01:09:22):
Now here's the thing, und nigga findest book.

Speaker 5 (01:09:26):
When I tell you though, when I listen to him,
my ears hurt, Like I want to like him because
he's so fine. Hopefully the sound is bad. I would
like to ride his face.

Speaker 1 (01:09:34):
I love watching him and his girl, and I like
their content.

Speaker 5 (01:09:37):
Oh they got he got a girl, And honestly, yeah,
I thought him in. Gloss was just like fuck friends.
They were laying in the bed and she was like,
you like me as you like. But Gloss was like,
that's her nigga, but not her nigga. If you posted
in you in the bed and you cut it off,

(01:09:57):
that's your nigga.

Speaker 2 (01:09:58):
But they've been doing that is not your nigga just
because you hosting girl.

Speaker 5 (01:10:02):
No, look at all the little dots that be up
in bed with niggas posting the day in the.

Speaker 1 (01:10:06):
Bed with these niggas.

Speaker 2 (01:10:08):
If you post only if he await my nigga asked me.

Speaker 1 (01:10:11):
When he was like, he was like, what did he
say to me? We had a conversation.

Speaker 5 (01:10:16):
You want to be introduced on the but like we
had a conversation about it, and I was like, Yo,
I'm like a really consensual poster.

Speaker 1 (01:10:23):
Like even my homegirls there's a picture.

Speaker 5 (01:10:25):
I think they won't like like I'll ask, but I
was like, you know, I do feel like it's time
for you to get a leg in there. And he
was left and he was like, yeah, like every time
maybe you post me, it's like a new tattoo, like
you got.

Speaker 1 (01:10:34):
One on this side, on this side.

Speaker 2 (01:10:36):
And then I'm like no, because there's gonna be a.

Speaker 5 (01:10:38):
Bit that's like I know that Africa absolutely, I know
that calf and then I'm gonna be sitting there crying
like did you fucker yesterday? No?

Speaker 1 (01:10:47):
So I feel like it's just a no for me.
I really don't. And also my homegirl got me so
convinced