EP 429: Essence Fest 2025 (Ft. Kandi Burruss)

Mandii and Weezy are back with a wild new episode featuring Grammy winner and TV powerhouse Kandi Burruss! The duo kicks things off with a hilarious Essence Fest 2025 recap, including Mandii nearly getting robbed by some aggressive studs and the thrill of becomingNew York Times best sellers. Then, it's a live sit-down with Kandi to talk about balancing motherhood, marriage, and the real tea behind the ladies’ new book, No Holes Barred. 

OUT NOW “No Holes Barred: A Dual Manifesto Of Sexual Exploration And Power” w/ Tempest X!
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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Decisions Decisions.

Speaker 2 (00:01):
I don't think you should say decisions decisions.

Speaker 3 (00:03):
It sounded like you was talking to cursing. You definitely
say to welcome.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
Welcome to the new podcast.

Speaker 1 (00:09):
Oh wait, you want to say together Decisions Decisions.

Speaker 4 (00:14):
Welcome everybody to a very, very very special edition of
Decisions Decisions.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
I'm your girl, Mandy V.

Speaker 1 (00:24):
Hey, everybody, welcome back to Decisions Decisions. My name is Weezy.
We are so excited to share this episode with you.
If you've never listened to Decisions Decisions and you only
know Candy, this is a very fun show where we
destigmatize kink. We talked about dating, relationships, sex history, but
today Candy's episode is really more focused on motherhood, parenthood,

(00:46):
being a boss woman, just her her journey throughout entrepreneurship,
and she gave some really good financial tips. So we're
excited to get into that with y'all. But before we do,
we got to reconnect this sessas best well.

Speaker 4 (00:59):
By the way, y'all, we are gonna work on bringing
Candy on to sit down for a real Decisions Decisions episode,
she said, But we can talk about she said, with us. Yeah,
y'all know you know, we are now rebrunded, so working
with you know, just bigger entities. They was like, don't
be going up on stage talk about no sucking deep,

(01:20):
So we leaned away from that. But when I say Candy,
her energy was amazing, y'all. I told her about my
story going to Mexico picking up a couple, and her
jaw drops and I was like, Candy, not me making
your jaw drop. But it was really interesting, even her
hearing my story about being a unicorn in Mexico from

(01:42):
the book, because.

Speaker 2 (01:44):
She was like, I'm hearing your story, but I'm.

Speaker 4 (01:47):
Realizing me and Todd would be the couple in this
so being picked up by a girl on vacation, she's like, ooh,
I can't wait to read the chapter. But really definitely
hoping that we get Candy back on the podcast soon.
But yeah, we'll start with the recap of essence Fest,
and before we start, we want to give a really

(02:08):
really big shout out to Black Effect Network, Heller, Gilead Sciences,
Black Women in Health, whose booths we were at on Friday,
as well as essence Fest in general. This was our
first time being at essence Fest.

Speaker 1 (02:25):
And ooh and so much of the recently expected. Like,
so shout out to Gilead for buying books for attendees
of Essence. They paired us with Black Women's Health Initiative
and they were so much fun. So fire, I know
we're definitely going to work with them again. Like, I
really liked everything that whole brand was about, all of
their staff. But let's talk about the arrival of New Orleans.

(02:48):
What did you see besides fedoras and fans. Oh, I'm
not gonna lie. Here's here's my overall consensus, right, and
I have a few takeaways. My overall consensus is that
I never want to be referred to as an aunty
ever again, because if Essence is the aunty Fest, I
have another sixty years before I become an aunty. I

(03:11):
saw everyone that was one hundred and two years old,
and I was like, oh, where are the millennials.

Speaker 4 (03:18):
When I hear aunty like and shit like that, I
think it's like thirty five and up.

Speaker 3 (03:24):
So I was expecting to see.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
Well, Aunty is not thirty five.

Speaker 4 (03:28):
Bro, Unty is thirty five. They did a whole breakdown
on the internet. Aunty is thirty five and up. And
so I was like, definitely looking for younger people. I'm
not gonna lie. It took me two days to spot
a yn. I was looking for the yn. It took
two days.

Speaker 2 (03:44):
I did not see a Yn until Saturday morning.

Speaker 4 (03:48):
But overall, overall, I will say my favorite thing about
the weekend by far was the food. I think that
New Orleans has is it is probably top three, one
of the best spots in the US to get food,
and they have their own cuisine, and I was so

(04:09):
glad to just have crawfish and fucking oysters. And I
think I had red beans and rice three different ways.

Speaker 2 (04:18):
Like, I had a great time. I was outside.

Speaker 4 (04:24):
So went to a mayor's gala on Thursday night, followed
by Club Quarantine with djd Nice.

Speaker 1 (04:33):
What was your favorite of that of the weekend?

Speaker 4 (04:36):
Okay, my favorite event at the weekend okay for me honestly.
And we'll get into like our work portion, but I
wanted to start out with the wildness of me actually
enjoying essence before we get into all the work parks.
I have a story and it's the random story, y'all.
It made me feel like I was in the metaverse.

(04:56):
I was in some other universe, because what the fuck?
So Saturday night. Saturday night, we completely finish all of
our obligations, all of our duties, and I'm like, bitch,
I just want to be outside. So in my mind,
I was going to be crawling on Bourbon Street, drunk

(05:17):
at fuck, swimming and pissed, because that's what Bourbon Street is.

Speaker 3 (05:21):
It's full of piss on the ground.

Speaker 4 (05:22):
And I was just like, I'm ready to block out
where New York Times bestsellers. I was ready to just
celebrate it because we hadn't really had the chance to
celebrate because we got the announcement on Wednesday and then
we were in New Orleans by Thursday. So anyways, I
end up meeting the first night that I arrived Spectacular

(05:42):
from Pretty Ricky.

Speaker 3 (05:44):
So we knew on each other.

Speaker 4 (05:45):
From online and in passing, and so I'm leaving to
the gala, run into him. I'm like, I know, I'll
see you again, see him again Friday. So Saturday, he
hits me like, what are y'all doing tonight? Do you
wanna slide to the to the club with me? And
I'm like sure, So I ask my homegirl, who's with me?
Mind you, she's celebrating her thirty seventh birthday and New

(06:07):
Orleans is like one of her favorite cities that she
hasn't been to since pre Katrina.

Speaker 3 (06:11):
So I'm like, bitch ollo.

Speaker 4 (06:13):
So so we we link up with Spectacular and the
club appearents time keeps getting pushed back. So y'all we
go to a bar maybe three blocks away from the hotel.
Y'all know, lie, I love that my friend lives in
LA and can keep the scene.

Speaker 3 (06:35):
Y'all.

Speaker 4 (06:36):
Spectacular was about to get lined up. There was these
bitches trying to like rob his ass, and my friend
was like, she spoke girl.

Speaker 2 (06:44):
There was two girls.

Speaker 4 (06:45):
Just standing behind him on the phone, and so my
homegirls in front and peeping these girls and they're just
standing at the bar, not ordering nothing, but on the phone.
So I go inspecs here and I'm like, uh, my
friend thinks like these girls are about to try to
so I say, let's go sit down where.

Speaker 3 (07:03):
No one can be behind you.

Speaker 4 (07:05):
So girl, as we go sit sit down, these two
stub bitches pull up and sit at the end of
our table and I'm like, now.

Speaker 3 (07:14):
There, now there's four.

Speaker 4 (07:16):
But he was about because this nigga had all his
goddamn jewelry on he was bedazzled, Nigga had on diamonds,
and I'm like, we are still in the Orleans, sir.

Speaker 3 (07:26):
So anyway, we.

Speaker 4 (07:27):
At the table and I'm like, I think these sub
bitches is here to rob you. So I look, mind
you now his security guard slash assistant is peeping, and
I'm like, I ain't gonna hold you. I don't want
to stay around to see how.

Speaker 2 (07:42):
Bold they are. I said, we need to go, bitch.

Speaker 4 (07:45):
As we get up and go tell Jazz we're leaving, bitch,
I hear one of the bitches say, stand there. I said,
oh no, bitch, we out of here. When I tell you,
we don't even wait for it to go plate for
my homegirl's food, I say, bitch, let's get the fuck
up out of here.

Speaker 3 (07:59):
So anyway we leave.

Speaker 4 (08:02):
We start zigzagging down the things because I'm like, let's
just go back to the hotel. These roads are blocked.
Let's just go back to the hotel so we can
go to the club.

Speaker 3 (08:11):
So boom, why.

Speaker 2 (08:15):
We're still with Spectacular, So we go because.

Speaker 4 (08:17):
We're going to the club with him. So we're like,
let's just go back to the hotel. Let's head to
the club. Okay, so we get in the car and
by this time, clearly because we stopped at a couple
of bars, my friend has been drinking mind You. We've
been playing it in the room since we ran into

(08:38):
him on Thursday. We've been listening to her favorite song
on the Blue Stars album, which, if you guys know,
because which, if you, if you know, you know is.

Speaker 3 (08:52):
A classic album to me.

Speaker 4 (08:54):
So we are in a car on the way to
the club and my homegirl shout out to Jasmine, decides
to start singing her favorite records on the Blue Stars
album Too Spectacular. Let's be very clear, she starts singing
his songs to him. So she goes to start singing

(09:16):
aj nothing but a Number, and talks about how problematic
the song is today. But she goes you say, hey.

Speaker 3 (09:25):
Hey, mind you.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
She's grinding, She's singing this goddamn.

Speaker 4 (09:28):
Song, and then out of nowhere, she yells, I'm a
young man, but my dick grown up and literally starts
rapping the first verse, but literally emphasizes I'm a young man,
but my dick grown up.

Speaker 3 (09:44):
And I'm like, oh my god, she is.

Speaker 4 (09:48):
Singing down this pretty ricky song, and all I could
do is smile because my friends are my friends and
they are their unique selves. And this one, bitch, we're
already in the car going to the club with this niggas,
so I'm like you Jazz. It was funny because we

(10:09):
started singing like grind on me and all this stuff.
And I even admit, I tell him, I'm like, listen,
I say, that album to me is such a classic.

Speaker 3 (10:18):
I've talked about it online.

Speaker 4 (10:19):
I said it's my favorite, and I said, what's crazy
is not too many men put it on their sex playlist.
And he ended up sending me to my phone one
of his sex playlists, and I was like, I said,
not too many men put it on sex playlist, But
I said, anytime I am in bed with somebody and

(10:40):
a pretty ricky song comes on, I stopped and just
know you a nasty niggle. Mind you, that album came
out before I was even hunching.

Speaker 3 (10:49):
But baby, that is the album. So anyways, we.

Speaker 2 (10:53):
Get to the club.

Speaker 4 (10:55):
I didn't announce it yet because this is where we
got into the metaverse of it all.

Speaker 3 (11:02):
Y'all. We get to the.

Speaker 4 (11:02):
Club and we leak up with who we're walking into
the club with. So, y'all, I am now with my Homegirl, Spectacular,
his homeboy, and Keith Sweat and his entourage. We into
the club with Keith Sweat, who's performing. It's like one
point thirty in the morning, and I'm like, bron am

(11:26):
I young?

Speaker 3 (11:27):
Where you said?

Speaker 1 (11:29):
What I would think? Like?

Speaker 3 (11:31):
What is the crowd like?

Speaker 1 (11:32):
Because Spectacular and Keith Sweat, it's essence best mind you?

Speaker 3 (11:36):
Spectacular.

Speaker 4 (11:36):
I think just is friends with Keith Sweat, so he's
not on the fire or anything.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
No, no, no, no, no no. So we go to the club.

Speaker 4 (11:44):
Keith Sweat is set to perform, and I'm like, what
is life? I'm walking into the club with goddamn a
member from Pretty Ricky and.

Speaker 3 (11:52):
Fucking Keith Sweat.

Speaker 4 (11:54):
So me and my homegirl are the only bitches at
the table. Mind you, it's like fifteen dudes. So we
get approached, y'all. We get approached to do something that
I can't believe I did at the grown age of
thirty four, But I obliged because I was like, this
is fun.

Speaker 2 (12:12):
Were we were, girl, let me finish a story. We
were I'm just guessing and having fun.

Speaker 4 (12:18):
We were set to literally go around the club and
select bitches to bring to the stage for Keith's Sweat
and I'm like, bro, I am thirty four years old,
literally about to go scope the.

Speaker 2 (12:33):
Scene for bitches for a sixty three year old Keith Sweat,
and I'm like, what is life?

Speaker 4 (12:41):
So anyways, we rummaged the club, we bring some bitches
up on stage. It's Essence Fest, so it definitely wasn't
giving options like a Miami or a New York here
in LA, but we did our due diligence. We had
a good time. I ended up getting one of the
girl's numbers because she was so cute. So then I
ask her because Keith Sweat is now performing and clearly

(13:03):
I brought bitches on stage that I thought was cute too,
So I'm shooting my shit with one of the ones
that I really like. I'm like, by the way, how
old are you? She says, she's twenty seven years old.
I said, do you even know this man on stage?
And she admits she doesn't. She said, I think some
of these songs my mom listens to. I said, you

(13:24):
know that gentleman right there with the dreads and she
knew spectacular from Loving Itmpop And I'm just like, wow,
we are literally in the era of where our generation
is probably the last to really know how great pretty
Ricky is, but also to realize that the generation that
is now outside also does not know Keith Sweat.

Speaker 2 (13:46):
I was like, Wow, okay.

Speaker 4 (13:50):
This is a generational era type of event where there
could be someone so young that they don't know a
mega superstar who has been him for the last forty years.

Speaker 3 (14:03):
Mind you.

Speaker 4 (14:04):
So I called my mama because I sent her a
video of Keith Sweat. She was like, oh, you have
the best seed in the house. I said, Mom, I've
been tasked to bring bitches to his table. Why my mama,
Why miss Tammy? Y'all said, Now, why you ain't facetimed me?
I could have been a bitch for Key Sweat. I said,
So you were gonna get to New Orleans and ten minutes, Mom,

(14:24):
I'm like, my mom's still wanting to gyrate on Keith
Sweat after all these years.

Speaker 3 (14:29):
I found to be hilarious.

Speaker 4 (14:30):
But to me, that was my most real type of
night to where I was like, Wow, I'm partying with
someone I grew up loving. I'm parting with someone my
mom grew up loving. But I definitely know his songs
and it was just a good ass, black ass time.
I had a really good time. So that was probably

(14:51):
my favorite night of essence. Wheezye, what was your favorite
moment outside of work?

Speaker 3 (15:02):
I guess for you.

Speaker 1 (15:04):
So for me, I was really exhausted with our book tour.
Like the day before I had just flown in. So,
as you guys now know, we're New York Times bestsellers.
I got to host a really dope book signing in
La Reparations Club. Shout out to them. We did two
black owned bookstores, Uncle Bobby's and Pheeley and Reparations Club
was your store, black owned Atlanta and now.

Speaker 4 (15:25):
The store in DC was also black owned. And yeah,
the store in Atlanta was also black owned. It was
forty fourth and third bookseller. Shout out to them. They're
on the campus of Filman and Moorhouse Medical Center. So
and then I think the store that we did in
New York was woman owned. So we did request indie

(15:45):
stores that were black owned, queer owned, and or woman owned.
So we accomplished that for the entire first week.

Speaker 1 (15:52):
That was really exciting. Like La was so vibe. So
two hours before getting into hair and makeup, on out
about our New York Times bestseller I got to tell
my mom in front of everyone. It was really special,
and also got some info on just a New York
Times bestseller period. I mentioned this to Manny when we
were in New Orleans Shan was hosting. She's like, damn girl,

(16:17):
I didn't even get that. She's like, you know who
else didn't get that. She was like, Drake had a book,
he didn't get that. Like I saw a comment on
one of Charlottagne's videos that were like, everybody's a New
York Times bestseller. I literally replied, and I.

Speaker 3 (16:28):
Was like, oh, you do it.

Speaker 4 (16:30):
Like not only that, Tempests alerted me for you guys
who aren't aware, point zero one percent of authors are
New York Times bestsellers. I think there's only about five
hundred people out of the millions of authors that actually
have the title. And so it's a really really big deal,

(16:53):
like the way that our artists want to win Grammys
and like, you know, like actors when Tony's and Emmys.
The New York Times Bestseller Award in title is like
the Krem Dela Krem of authors outside of getting into
like politary awards type shit. But yeah, it's a huge deal,

(17:14):
and not many people get it at all.

Speaker 1 (17:15):
It's a huge deal, and I think for us to
have received it after having such a tough week with
bookstore stuff. As you can hear on our Patreon episode
on the town Hall, it's super juicy over there.

Speaker 3 (17:27):
It was just dope.

Speaker 1 (17:27):
But beyond eating food, I think so a few things
happened that I wanted to chat with you about because
I think it'll be a really cool conversation for everybody
that listens. And I would love to know everybody's top five.
So we always see the memes when someone's like me,
five minutes into being drunk in a city, I can
move here. So I had been creating a list in

(17:49):
my head of places I could live forever. I've always
said that New Orleans was my favorite city in the
country because I don't think, and I repeat this so much,
there's anything else that is that has that much consistency
or culture native to that city. Now, everyone that's listening,
y'all are in New York and Texas somewhere else and

(18:09):
screaming at me, hear me out. The sound of New
Orleans is unique. The taste of New Orleans is one
spread around the world, and I truly believe It is
a place where everyone almost assimilates to the culture, the accent,
and I generally don't see that when it comes up
to different ethnic groups. New York is the best city

(18:32):
in the world, right, nothing the top New York. You
can go to any fucking country in the world by
just a walk through Queens. But there's something about New
Orleans that's so unified and special that I just love it.
So I made this list, and I wanted to see
if some of the cities could be the same for you,
or at least one. So these are places I want
to live or have my forever home. Number one for me.

Speaker 3 (18:57):
Is New York.

Speaker 1 (18:59):
My forever is priced about eleven million dollars in the
Greenwich Village. It's a townhouse. It is literally how I
would love to live in New York. Living in New
York in your dream home is literally impossible for anyone
I know that's not a billionaire, fuck millionaire nigga.

Speaker 3 (19:15):
Two La.

Speaker 1 (19:17):
I could find my dream home for a million dollars
in La. La. Got some beautiful landscape, beautiful views, nature,
good weather, and there's enough black people there for me.

Speaker 3 (19:27):
Paris I love.

Speaker 1 (19:30):
I think it's got some of the best black scene
in Europe, fashion, capital, food, impeccable. I just love it.
And number four is now New Orleans for me.

Speaker 3 (19:41):
Here's why.

Speaker 1 (19:43):
I haven't felt so at home by every single person
that I met that was in hospitality. You know how
you can get attitudes of time you pull up to
a motherfucking spot and everybody just met. I just felt
so at peace at home in New Orleans. It reminded
me why I love this place. And I started going
Magazine Street, one of the most famous streets to New
Orleans outside of Bourbon in the French Quarter. Nine hundred

(20:06):
thousand dollars for a fucking three story home, and I
was like, oh, bruh. Then my last one is Mexico City,
and y'all already know I think I'm Mexican, so I'm curious.
So a lot of this for me. Obviously, I can't
afford my dream home in New York today, but I
really thought about all the factors of this shit and
where I could be happy, where I can find community,

(20:27):
cities I could live in where I have no friends,
but I can make some just cities that feel like home. Art, food, culture, la. Sorry,
I ain't got the food, but y'all are good at
everything else. But yeah, I really want to know, what
do you think those five are for you? I know
for sure I don't have five.

Speaker 4 (20:47):
New York great would be New York would be where
my dream home is New York, and I would want it.
Actually in Columbus Circle, overlooking Central Park.

Speaker 2 (20:59):
That's my happy my happy place. I probably went there.

Speaker 4 (21:05):
I used to live like three stops from Central Park
when I was in Long Island City, and so for
me being able to overlook the park, be able to
ride the scooters, some of my favorite restaurants are over there,
I would just say there.

Speaker 2 (21:20):
I mean clearly, I'm in Atlanta now.

Speaker 4 (21:22):
This is my third time living in Atlanta in my life,
where my community is. This is where people I've went
to high school with, these are where. This is where
my best friends are. Other than that, I.

Speaker 2 (21:32):
Just like traveling. I think I really liked the Bay.
If I had to just add a third, oh wow,
I really liked the Bay. But I still haven't been
there enough.

Speaker 4 (21:43):
I fucking y'all know how much I loved the Bay
just from All Star Weekend this year.

Speaker 2 (21:48):
Other than that, I am very fucking American.

Speaker 4 (21:53):
I lived in Singapore for six months and was miserable.

Speaker 3 (21:58):
I don't like yours.

Speaker 1 (21:59):
That might have been culture shock.

Speaker 2 (22:01):
No, I mean I don't like Europe. I don't like y'all.
I don't like accents.

Speaker 4 (22:05):
And although we're dealing with the Orange man in office,
I've literally said it when when my friends are like, ooh,
let me figure out where I'm gonna go live, I'd
rather just put up with here.

Speaker 3 (22:15):
It's it's what I know.

Speaker 4 (22:17):
I fucking I'm real like bitch, I'm typical American, like
I don't like I like it immersing myself into other cultures,
but I wouldn't want to live there.

Speaker 1 (22:31):
I don't.

Speaker 3 (22:32):
I don't.

Speaker 4 (22:33):
I've never gone to another country, and I've been to
a lot. There's there's countries where I'm like, ooh, I
could have done another couple of days here, but I've
never been anywhere and been like ooh, I could see
myself living here.

Speaker 1 (22:47):
Was gonna say something that was a big factor for me.
I forgot to mention after this New Orleans zillo a
little starch. I did I hit my boyfriend. He's like, nah,
bro DMV gotta be on that list. I'm like, you
know why, It's not because of the weather. New York
is the only place in the world I will sacrifice
not being warm.

Speaker 3 (23:06):
And it's okay.

Speaker 4 (23:07):
Actually, now that you say that, d C is the
only city that I go to where I start. Look,
you say, you've said it on the spot.

Speaker 3 (23:14):
I love I love d C.

Speaker 4 (23:16):
The only thing is DC for me would have to
be It's unfortunate I would have to change careers.

Speaker 3 (23:24):
Like I think.

Speaker 4 (23:25):
The only thing that always like puts me into reality
about DC because I've wanted to move to DC.

Speaker 2 (23:31):
Is that it is very government.

Speaker 4 (23:33):
It is very political, it is very corporate, and so
for me, there's no creativity there that would allow me
to flourish in podcasting, television, film, radio.

Speaker 2 (23:45):
It's unless I.

Speaker 3 (23:46):
Do the news.

Speaker 4 (23:47):
So for me, that's what always slaps me back into reality.
But for me, it's New York. Like I love New York,
but yeah, I would want to New York or New York.
To me, I don't care what anyone says. Period is
the best city in the.

Speaker 3 (24:04):
World that's in the world.

Speaker 1 (24:06):
When you are traveling, it almost feels like you got
this little stamp of approval because they know, like, hey,
maybe you've never been to Bali before, but you're in Indonesia.
You've heard of this country because you live in New York,
You've seen other types of Asians.

Speaker 3 (24:20):
You know.

Speaker 1 (24:21):
When I lived in Florida, and I think many of
us can attest to this as we grow and get
older and mature, Asian people were Chinese people to me
because I had no other viewpoint until I started to
get older and be around other people. Now my friends
are mixed with Koreans, Hi, Vianna me, Like, we just
simply don't know. And that's not even this prejudice thing.

(24:42):
You're just kind of dumb sometimes like there's not enough.
And I'm not saying that all Floridians are dumb. We
have to do our own due diligence, but for the
most part, when you're in this place that's just kind
of locked to its own thing. The thing I'm really
blessed for, I believe, is getting to learn so many
different Caribbean and you know countries. I feel so well
versed in Latin and Caribbean countries from living in Florida.

(25:05):
But when I moved to New York, I was meeting
people I never met from Africa, Congolese, Sierra Leonian like
Gail and I very rarely met people like that.

Speaker 4 (25:15):
For me, it was for me it was the top
hats and the curls h Brooklyn, the skirts.

Speaker 3 (25:22):
Passed the Way Miami. I had never seen.

Speaker 4 (25:26):
I had never seen what is it hasidic juice, juice,
and so to learn about their community. They have their
own hospital, their own buses, and I had just never
seen them dressed like that.

Speaker 2 (25:38):
Maybe it's too hot in Florida, I don't know. I mean,
I'm just saying it wasn't why I.

Speaker 4 (25:43):
Got to New York, that I actually got to see
them in their community, like.

Speaker 1 (25:50):
For anyone that doesn't know. They're in Williamsburg, which is
also of the most hippy neighborhood in the fucking world.
So that should be funny. I've been learning.

Speaker 4 (25:59):
I was listening to Around the Way Curls shout out
to Shanti and Antonette, and they said that New York
City has the biggest population of Jews outside of Israel,
like in the world.

Speaker 2 (26:13):
So it was I mean, New York is just incredible.

Speaker 4 (26:16):
I mean, y'all know, if you've read No holds Bard
in some capacity, Weisy and I both have like love
letters and thank you to the City of New York.

Speaker 2 (26:25):
For our journey of sexuality and all the things.

Speaker 4 (26:31):
Actually, one moment, I just want to add to this
because this platform is so big. One of the biggest
things that I am disappointed in in the last week
from social media to people who did not even attend
Essence Fest is almost the need and urge to discredit

(26:58):
talk shit talk down to our black.

Speaker 2 (27:04):
Events are black institutions.

Speaker 4 (27:07):
And I've seen this happen anytime BET Awards comes out.
We saw it with Ruth's picnic. I've seen it happen
withinvest past. I just had this conversation with Troy from
invest from EYL. I don't understand the need and desire
to constantly tear down the things that we are creating

(27:30):
for our own community. And we understand the DEI has
recently been taken out of We understand that Target was a.

Speaker 3 (27:39):
Part of Essence this year.

Speaker 4 (27:41):
That deal probably took place a year ago before we
knew that they removed DEI. To me, it's unfortunate we
are in a place where we constantly want bigger budgets
given to us. We constantly want to show up or
have others respect what we're creating and what or building
When our own people are dismantling it. I'm going to

(28:04):
insert a clip here of someone who is able to
express this far better than I am. But I want
you to take heed the next time you get on X,
the next time you get on Twitter, the next time
you get on Spill, the next time you get on Instagram,
the next time you get on any social media app
to talk down on a black institution or event.

Speaker 2 (28:25):
I want you to consider this.

Speaker 4 (28:27):
And I'm gonna insert this clip and this gives exactly
my sentiments on how everyone has chose to trash this
year's Essence Fest. And I just really implore specifically our
listeners to take heed in the energy that you were
putting out into the universe about our own black.

Speaker 2 (28:44):
Institutions and events. And so check this clip out.

Speaker 5 (28:48):
You just got back from Essensfest, and I've seen a
lot of the online commentary, and I think that there's
one important distinction that we need to make early and often.
That is the distinction between feedback and fellowship. Some of
you just seem to be in love with the idea
of providing negative feedback. I've even seen feedback from people
who weren't actually even at the event. I will remind

(29:10):
us it is important for us to protect our stuff.

Speaker 3 (29:13):
Now.

Speaker 5 (29:13):
Look, nothing is perfect, and there are always opportunities to improve,
but the spirit in which we do that is super important.
Feedback often is about just critiquing the product. Fellowship protects
the product. Feedback is transactional, where Fellowship is transformational. These
sort of distinctions are the things that I deeply encourage

(29:34):
us to be thinking about as we're talking about one
of the very important institutions that we have in our community.
So much economic impact, so many people have been provided
jobs that ordinarily wouldn't have had them. And again, while
I understand there are always opportunities to improve, the spirit
in which we continue to have these very public discussions
about things that ultimately are important.

Speaker 3 (29:56):
To us has to stop.

Speaker 5 (30:00):
I love us and I know that you do too,
but the spirit in which we have some of these
discussions has to change. Congratulations to the Essence team on
having what was an amazing experience. It's very difficult to
pull off such large scale events. I cannot wait to
come back to continue to participate in what is an

(30:21):
institution inside of our community, and I hope that you
will join me in doing the same and supporting all
the other great activations and experiences that we have going
on throughout the country. Let's encourage them, yes, to be better,
but to do it again in a spirit that makes sense.

Speaker 3 (30:37):
See you soon.

Speaker 1 (30:44):
Well, guess what, speaking of sexuality, even they don't get it,
but Candy Coder Knights was so good and she literally
was like, oh, I'm the broddlem with y'all, Like, we're
doing this again. So we are going to make sure
to bring Candy Coder Knights out of retirement for a
good horrible mix one day. But for now, enjoy listening
to the interview from Essence Fest featuring Candy bed.

Speaker 4 (31:07):
Now, y'all, we do have a very special guest coming
out here. I don't know how we've been able to
keep it a secret all weekend. I think every time
we went somewhere, Weezy was like, can I share who
were talking to? Can I share who were talking to?
And I just fan growed out. So hopefully we really
dive into how she's become the boss that she is,
how she navigates being a mom, how she never.

Speaker 1 (31:29):
You said why, I didn't even know you were gonna
give that away? Was that too much?

Speaker 3 (31:34):
Look you said, what? Oh wait, y'all already know, oh.

Speaker 1 (31:39):
So we can day well, Dania, we really genuinely are
excited to talk to this person because I think not
only as lovers of watching her grow on her show,
watching her family, we really get to respect this woman
as an entity herself. And I think that's the most
exciting part about the conversation today, is like we got
all these juice details about the tea and the surface

(32:02):
level stuff, but it's like this person wasn't just a housewife.

Speaker 3 (32:05):
They're really a boss.

Speaker 1 (32:07):
Yeah, And the premise of this show that she's become
such an icon of is for women that we're supposed
to sit at home and watch the kids.

Speaker 4 (32:13):
And we know that ain't no candy. That is not candy.
So without further ado, do we want to bring.

Speaker 3 (32:19):
Her own any y'all.

Speaker 4 (32:20):
Ready for Candy to join us on the stage.

Speaker 3 (32:23):
What's up, Y'alljello? Everybody, Hi, y'all doing okay? It's nice.
We gonna give.

Speaker 1 (32:34):
Candy some compliments, and once we do, I want to
hear it. Hell yeah, ain't that dress sparkly?

Speaker 3 (32:40):
Ain't she looking fly? Period? Be our favorite?

Speaker 6 (32:47):
Congratulations y'all I being a best seller?

Speaker 3 (32:50):
Thank you?

Speaker 4 (32:52):
By the way, the song that she came out to.
Y'all is celebrating its twenty fifth year anniversary.

Speaker 3 (32:59):
Oh yeah, this year, this year.

Speaker 1 (33:01):
Uh huh, kids and songs the same age.

Speaker 3 (33:05):
That is crazy.

Speaker 1 (33:07):
And also thank you for congratulating us. But I'm trying
to reach you like you.

Speaker 3 (33:10):
I want some Emmy's next. Come on, let's go.

Speaker 1 (33:14):
You know, when we were prepping for this interview, So
to interview someone that you're aware of, you normally don't
have to do googles because you can just interview them
about the things you enjoy, I was.

Speaker 3 (33:24):
Like, I ain't know ef I know. Oh yay.

Speaker 4 (33:29):
She started, She said, oh, fella does this, Candy does this,
Candy does this?

Speaker 1 (33:34):
I said, uh huh.

Speaker 4 (33:35):
Because I'm a Bravo girly, so I know your whole discography,
your whole iad your whole everything.

Speaker 1 (33:40):
Now you know what's embarrassing about me all, So I'm
not a Bravo girly because you know, you got to
pick a side. I'm a TLC. I like, I want
to see someone who's six hundred.

Speaker 3 (33:49):
Pounds and losing it.

Speaker 1 (33:50):
I want to see an African man with a fat
white lady getting married. That's what I want to see.
I need to see desperation that.

Speaker 4 (33:58):
Well, we're gonna have a little bit of fun before
we get into the conversation with a quick fire, really
easy ones. Don't don't be thinking too long the first
thing that comes to your mind. Oh, okay, Candy so
Boom favorite franchise outside of atl.

Speaker 3 (34:15):
I don't. I'm not even gonna lie to you. I
don't really watch I.

Speaker 1 (34:18):
Said, I don't know even if it's the memes, I
don't watch it either.

Speaker 6 (34:21):
But okay, here's the thing. It was a couple that
I watched when they first started. Okay, so I'm gonna
give it to potmy.

Speaker 1 (34:28):
Okay, I like that answer. I like that answer. Okay,
this one I love because I feel like this is
a really interesting question. Andy decides to take a year
off to keep being a dad, just enjoying his life.
Who is your chosen guest host for the reunion?

Speaker 3 (34:48):
Guest hosts?

Speaker 4 (34:48):
Yeah, like, who sits in place of Andy? If you
could have anyone else hosts?

Speaker 3 (34:52):
Y'all? Period?

Speaker 6 (34:55):
Like listen, I feel like anybody that's going to make
hold much accountable, like make them actually answer the questions
and when you know they lion.

Speaker 3 (35:05):
Call them out for it. Yeah.

Speaker 6 (35:07):
Yeah, they gotta be somebody that's actually gonna keep them.

Speaker 1 (35:10):
Accountable because he said, you said that ain't happening.

Speaker 3 (35:13):
It'd be a lot of lies on the show.

Speaker 1 (35:16):
You know what, I want, bring Wendy out of retirement,
get Wendy Williams. Oh, I would.

Speaker 3 (35:23):
Like that, Wendy. They might need to take Wendy off
the stage.

Speaker 4 (35:26):
I would like that. That would be crazy. Now I
have another question for you. What's more fun touring with
Escape or going on housewives vacations?

Speaker 3 (35:39):
You know both is tough?

Speaker 6 (35:42):
Okay, So I would say now that lately with my
group Escape, we've been on the same page.

Speaker 1 (35:49):
Okay, but you know.

Speaker 6 (35:52):
Unfortunately we haven't been. We've been torn with not all
of our members. But in this past year or two years,
I don't know, I guess two years has been. Uh,
this is the longest we've ever gone without arguing.

Speaker 3 (36:10):
That's crazy.

Speaker 6 (36:11):
I was having a conversation with my girls just a
couple of months ago, and I was like, can y'all
believe we haven't had any arguments?

Speaker 4 (36:18):
Candy, I'm gonna tell you now you just jinx sits
Me and Weezy do the same thing when we go
on tour, we haven't argued and in the next city were.

Speaker 3 (36:26):
Going on nine days and night arguing. You know what
it is?

Speaker 1 (36:29):
We we not only it's not like we just tour together.
We spend every week, two episodes a week, constantly on calls.

Speaker 4 (36:37):
This is the bulk of our business. So we'll just
be like, uh huh, one little thing.

Speaker 3 (36:43):
I thought you got French fries. We just start fighting.

Speaker 1 (36:46):
But I would love to also dig into you about
the healthiness of talking about disagreements.

Speaker 3 (36:51):
Okay, all right, So oh, I.

Speaker 4 (36:55):
Just had one last question and then we're gonna get that,
and it's not this question. I'm gonna go off screen.
What's harder being a wife or being a mom? I
asked that question to Gia Casey and her answer was
very interesting.

Speaker 1 (37:09):
You're a mama, thrum.

Speaker 6 (37:11):
Well, you know what, that's a hard question too, because
it's tough either side. But what I'm realizing is I
feel like it's tough for being a mom to a
twenty two year old, and it is to young kids. Okay, Now, Riley,
she used to be so easy.

Speaker 3 (37:31):
When she was little.

Speaker 6 (37:32):
Now she'd be making me want to hit butter sometimes,
Like you know, it's so different it's like, you know,
they want you to be there for them emotionally, but
then she don't want to talk to you. And it's
like if you don't do something for her that you
do for the little kids, oh you short favoritism and
doing all this stuff. But then in the next second,

(37:55):
it's like, she won't even answer my phone call.

Speaker 3 (37:58):
I just be wanting to snatch her. Riley.

Speaker 1 (38:01):
Sorry, I appreciate that because I'm so tired of parents
acting like they don't get mad at their kids and.

Speaker 3 (38:08):
Just go through ebbs and flows.

Speaker 1 (38:10):
I heard an interview with Kenny Barris where he said,
right now, my favorite kid is my youngest one, but
it used to be this one.

Speaker 3 (38:17):
I was like, damn, that's so honest.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
I'll say you even saying how difficult it was.

Speaker 4 (38:23):
I saw a recent episode so Riley's now on her
own show on TV, and I thought it was amazing
how you showed up for her with handling the microaggressions
that she's receiving on the show. Like hearing that phone
call and hearing you be a mother but also a friend,
but also like tell her what the world is actually
like was so good to see, Like, even for.

Speaker 3 (38:43):
Reality TV, it was so dope. Well, I think Riley did.
She does a good.

Speaker 6 (38:48):
Job of defending herself and speaking up for herself because.

Speaker 3 (38:52):
Look at who hermummy is, William.

Speaker 6 (38:55):
But I mean, you know, of course I'm gonna be
there for my daughter. I really want to be on
a plane.

Speaker 3 (39:01):
But my daughter, like, we probably said more than that
than what they show. But it was like, oh, how
is he?

Speaker 6 (39:10):
He was like, you know, we could send your brother,
your cousin Patrick up there. They the same age, They
the same age. Hey, yo, that's real Atlanta. You know
Candy in the gang. If y'all remember Patrick, Yet.

Speaker 3 (39:24):
He's not to be played many a big dude, Candy said.

Speaker 1 (39:28):
They cut that part out the questions we're gonna ask us.
Everybody in this audience is gonna be getting a free
copy of the book. We both broke up the book
into pleasure, pain, progression, and power. So we're gonna start
with questions about pleasure since we talk about Todd.

Speaker 4 (39:42):
Yes, so I want to ask you. You and Todd
have built a relationship in the public eye. What's been
the secret sauce to keeping your marriage intact both at
home and in business? Because you are also working with
him and then you raise a family together. So what's
a sauce to like balance that out?

Speaker 6 (40:02):
Well, I al would say communication. We spend a lot
of time together and keep it fun.

Speaker 3 (40:09):
You know, you keep it fun.

Speaker 1 (40:10):
That means, look at y'all, what do we wear?

Speaker 3 (40:15):
You said, what do we wear?

Speaker 1 (40:16):
We put something on to keep it fun?

Speaker 3 (40:18):
What we doing? Candy?

Speaker 5 (40:19):
You know what?

Speaker 6 (40:19):
That is kind of crazy because I need to step
my game up and put in the outfits on. Okay,
I mean those type of outfits because he'd be like, okay, really,
you're not gonna like that's how you gonna come up
with your.

Speaker 3 (40:33):
With your mindy on your head. That is hilarious.

Speaker 4 (40:37):
I just went on a date the other day and
he literally I said, oh, I got to do my makeup.

Speaker 1 (40:41):
He said why, I said, no, no, no, no, no no, I.

Speaker 3 (40:43):
Want to dress up. It looks cute.

Speaker 4 (40:44):
A date is an event now, so maybe y'all could
like start dressing up for like date night.

Speaker 6 (40:49):
Well, yeah, I could dress up for that, but he'll
he'll still complain about that because he'll tell me, Okay,
let's go somewhere, and I'll say, well, do you want
me to keep my flat on? You want me to
put on my heels. Oh, you can keep on your flash,
you can keep.

Speaker 3 (41:00):
On your flats.

Speaker 6 (41:01):
But then if I go out with my girls and
I got my heels on, Oh, you don't never.

Speaker 3 (41:05):
Do that for me?

Speaker 4 (41:06):
Why why is that a thing?

Speaker 3 (41:10):
Like wait a minute, you just said you need me
to put the heels on.

Speaker 1 (41:13):
But whatever, you know what I'm thinking about, just because
I feel like as we get older, nights.

Speaker 3 (41:18):
At home are just like what we want to do.

Speaker 1 (41:21):
Now when you're at home and you need like just
a day long, what's the thing that you want to
do at home? Is it nothing? Is it a stupid
TV show? Is it being on the phone gossip?

Speaker 3 (41:33):
Being like?

Speaker 1 (41:34):
What's your thing when you at home?

Speaker 6 (41:36):
I like just catching up on my favorite TV shows
or watching a new series.

Speaker 4 (41:41):
Your friend just said Instagram. You just scrolling on your Instagram.
I would scroll for a hour or two. But I
do what I like watching scripted series. So yeah, man, Todd,
that's we love setting up catching a series and just watching.

Speaker 1 (41:59):
What's your favorite snack when you're watching TV?

Speaker 3 (42:03):
My favorite snack? What's it do you do?

Speaker 1 (42:05):
Do you do it in the bed, because I might
have a snack in the bed.

Speaker 3 (42:08):
Yeah, cheese?

Speaker 6 (42:10):
Crackers, Like, but you know when you I like crackle
barrel extra sharp cheese and you slice it yourself and put.

Speaker 3 (42:16):
It on y'all, like y'all mind ate crackers.

Speaker 4 (42:19):
That's that's her. That's hers too. We've known each other
twenty years.

Speaker 3 (42:23):
That's my snack. What crack it out?

Speaker 1 (42:26):
Jesus crackers loootery BG ghetto.

Speaker 4 (42:29):
Now going into pleasure, but bringing it into business. What
does pleasure look like for you as this entrepreneur? Is
it the deal closing moment, the creative process, or the
payoff when you get the chick.

Speaker 3 (42:44):
We can't say all of the above.

Speaker 1 (42:46):
Do they have different feelings though.

Speaker 3 (42:48):
Like, yes, totally different feelings.

Speaker 6 (42:50):
Like I love when I come up with a good idea,
you know, if I know I know something is gonna bump,
especially like if I'm writing a song and I'm like,
oh yeah, this's gonna be.

Speaker 3 (42:59):
This it he like.

Speaker 6 (43:01):
I love that to create it. I hate the part
of recording.

Speaker 3 (43:07):
It takes too long.

Speaker 6 (43:08):
You know, even though I can finish it real quick,
I still be like, Okay, I want whatever is.

Speaker 3 (43:13):
In my head to immediately be here. But so the.

Speaker 6 (43:17):
Creating, you know, coming up with it, and the payoff
at the end to see the enjoyment of the people.

Speaker 3 (43:25):
So let's say if we did you know, one of
our live.

Speaker 6 (43:28):
Performances, and I see when you know what the people
react to and what people want to be a part
of that.

Speaker 3 (43:36):
Yeah, I think the.

Speaker 1 (43:37):
Deal closing is like, ooh, that one's the one that
give me a little.

Speaker 4 (43:42):
You've made a lot of songs, a lot of songs.
Is there any song where today you're like, I can't.

Speaker 3 (43:48):
Believe it's this big.

Speaker 1 (43:49):
I can't believe people still sing it. I didn't what song.

Speaker 6 (43:54):
All of them, but no, but what I'm I mean,
I would have to say, you know, like no scrubs
obviously the biggest one, and the fact that people keep
sampling it and making new songs.

Speaker 1 (44:04):
She said, ex sampling. I'm a clear it.

Speaker 3 (44:06):
I appreciate it.

Speaker 6 (44:08):
But it's surprising because it's like, you know, that was like,
you know, just a saying and me and my homegirls
used to say talking about dudes, and.

Speaker 3 (44:18):
Then now the whole world be saying it. No, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 (44:20):
No, you think it's a surprise.

Speaker 4 (44:22):
The scrubs are still out here, that's why they're still
singing it.

Speaker 3 (44:25):
I just watched Stress girl.

Speaker 1 (44:27):
You see these flags, listen flagged all.

Speaker 4 (44:29):
The scrubs I just watched waiting to excel, like maybe
a couple months ago as an adult, I said, we're
still dealing with the same.

Speaker 3 (44:37):
Stuff about thirty years later.

Speaker 1 (44:39):
Yeah, it's crazy.

Speaker 6 (44:40):
It's just a you know, it's like a blessing to
be able to go to a karaoke bar and to
see a couple songs that I wrote that's in the
book because we always gonna see Buggebo and those scrubs.

Speaker 3 (44:51):
Or Bills Bill's Bills.

Speaker 1 (44:52):
Oh way, those scrubs is my favorite karaoke song, and
I always come out like I'm about to kill it,
you know what. You when someone come up a karaoke like.

Speaker 3 (44:59):
Can they can they not sing? I'll be like, hey, y'all,
I'm from New York.

Speaker 1 (45:04):
Niceis here?

Speaker 3 (45:05):
Everybody I was over.

Speaker 6 (45:07):
I even see it, like even overseas, like I see,
don't think I'm not in a karaoke book.

Speaker 3 (45:12):
Oh yeah, to me.

Speaker 1 (45:13):
I just like songs where I don't have vocals, y'all.
I just talk, that's it. I can't sing.

Speaker 4 (45:20):
So if I feel like it's just say enough to
where I sound all right, that's what That's what all
of them songs get to me.

Speaker 6 (45:26):
So I think a lot of people don't recognize is
we love our And I've written for big singers like
Whitney Houston, and I've written for you know, people who
just do kick cool singing like CLC.

Speaker 3 (45:40):
You know what I mean.

Speaker 6 (45:42):
But people don't realize it's not normally like Witney Houston
is Whitney Houston. But if we're talking about a majority
of the singers, the ones that really really be blowing
up is the ones who just got a unique tone
and a song that regular people can sing along with.

Speaker 1 (45:57):
Oh I'm regular for you know the good.

Speaker 3 (46:00):
We don't know it's the truth. I mean, people talk
about j Low as much.

Speaker 6 (46:04):
As they want, but she got a gang of records
that she could do a whole concert for an hour.

Speaker 3 (46:09):
Everybody gonna be.

Speaker 1 (46:10):
SI cause we all sound like Jake.

Speaker 4 (46:12):
So I'm gonna tell you right now, I don't speak
no Sage, but every time I.

Speaker 3 (46:14):
Hear it, he killed that movie. Okay, you get my point.

Speaker 6 (46:19):
It's like it's I mean, I could just go down
the list of and be like, it's the songs that
people can just sing along with or that they can
relate to. So for me, okay recently it ain't out yet,
but and artists from Africa sent me in one of
their songs and was like, hey, you know, I want

(46:41):
you to put a verse on here.

Speaker 3 (46:43):
I was like, all right, dope.

Speaker 6 (46:44):
But my train of thought when I was listening to
the verse, I mean, you know, the like, okay, how
I'm gonna come with it? Right, I'm like, I need
to have like it's the second verse. Her first part
company was very at and then you know they always
have something to make you want to do a little dance.
In the second part, I'm like, okay, and they had

(47:05):
brought that energy in it. I was say, okay, the
second verse has to come in with energy, and each
part of the verse has to feel like a hook.
Everybody's gonna have to be able to sing each section
you get them. So for instance, using a song that
you would know, like just using no scrubs. If you say,
if I say no, I don't want to show number no,

(47:26):
I don't want to give you mine. See you can
sing along with me, right, But that's not the hook.
That's the pre chorus or the B section. So for me,
the type of writer I am, I like to write
multiple hooks. In a song, so every section feels like
everybody why.

Speaker 1 (47:42):
It's stuck on? We do not go to music school.
I didn't know what you were saying, but that was
a good. That was good.

Speaker 3 (47:48):
I was like, okay, you want to get into the
pain section. I mean, and I explained it to where
you understood it. Look, got it.

Speaker 1 (47:56):
We gotta took us to school. Funny that you just
taught us that cause. The question I have for you
to end this section was, if it wasn't entertainment, no TV,
no music, not really creative, what would be candy in
an alternate universe's job? What would you be doing every
day for a living?

Speaker 3 (48:13):
Ooh okay.

Speaker 6 (48:15):
If people have asked me before, if I never made
it in music or entertainment, what would I've done?

Speaker 3 (48:22):
So?

Speaker 6 (48:23):
When I was younger, I said, if I don't make it,
in my dream, I really wanted to be a performing
arts teacher because I love I want.

Speaker 3 (48:33):
To always do something that is creative.

Speaker 6 (48:36):
With what I love, and I love kids or whatever,
and I love being creative and coming up with stuff.
So I feel like I would feel fulfilled. And I mean,
being a business person I am. We probably would have
still had we probably would have DoD the performing arts thing,
and then we probably have our own performing arts company
where we do shows and put on performances outside.

Speaker 1 (48:58):
We just want you to be simple, lady.

Speaker 3 (49:00):
Dang, now you've got a bottom of life. It's just
not simple. Okay. When I was real little, I said
I wanted to be an accountant or a lawyer.

Speaker 1 (49:11):
Before we were talking about relationships.

Speaker 3 (49:13):
Girl. Okay, now we're digging into Moore.

Speaker 6 (49:16):
I knew that it was possible to do what you
love for a job.

Speaker 3 (49:20):
Or a living.

Speaker 1 (49:21):
That is so dope.

Speaker 3 (49:22):
We're gonna get into pain.

Speaker 4 (49:24):
And I want to bring up a little bit because
I know we have a lot of moms out here,
and I want to know what's been some dating advice
that you recently had to give Riley because she is
in her twenties now. And then also, how does that
differ from.

Speaker 3 (49:38):
You have sons like you have boys?

Speaker 4 (49:41):
Be the difference between how you give dating advice to
both of them?

Speaker 3 (49:45):
Okay, so a Riley, Ah.

Speaker 6 (49:49):
So I right now. But first of all, Riley don't
really want to hear what nobody got to say.

Speaker 3 (49:56):
Neither do we. We don't listen either. We thirty four.
She's pretty private.

Speaker 6 (50:01):
She doesn't really like I'm an open book, I say whatever.
She doesn't want to tell all her business, so she's
even secretive sometimes with me. But I would say that
I was overjoyed that she broke over her last situation
and the current situation.

Speaker 3 (50:18):
I really like him. He's really nice.

Speaker 6 (50:20):
And I always feel like you need to date somebody
who motivates you to be your better self, and I
think she met somebody that does that. Sometimes people could
just add on to the BS. You know, if you
know you being lazer, you know you not really just
doing what you're supposed to do, then you can match

(50:41):
up with somebody who they kind of on that, and
then you find yourself more in a salump yep. But
then sometimes you meet somebody that you know, when you
feeling into something, they bring up your energy like uh
huh uh, come on, let's do this.

Speaker 3 (50:54):
You can get it together.

Speaker 6 (50:54):
This you should be looking at this, you know, bringing ideas.

Speaker 3 (50:57):
To the table.

Speaker 1 (50:59):
I like this. We had a question we actually asked
on a podcast when we were debating a bit. We
watched this clip of a woman controversial take, and she
said women need to date a man better than them
to be able to respect them they need someone more
in alpha, like women need someone better. Better is subjective

(51:20):
in order.

Speaker 3 (51:20):
To be able to respect them, respect.

Speaker 1 (51:23):
Have a fulfilling relationship, we need to see someone better.
Maybe it's fitness, maybe it's wealth, maybe it's creativity. And
it's controversial and messed up as it was. I understand
why she said it. What do you think about that
sentiment that we need to date someone who's better in
something than we are.

Speaker 6 (51:42):
Well, I think there's another I think that's good that
I guess have somebody that's better and something that you are.
But I think the issue is that most people equate
that to me, he has to have more money than
you do. That's the part that I don't necessarily agree
with because the reason why I say that is because
a lot of times right now in today's society, women

(52:04):
are making more than men and you are limiting your
dating pool. If you just sitting there thinking like, oh,
if you don't make more in the me and and
we not gonna it's not gonna work. First of all,
respect should be had no matter what level a person
is on. So let's not debate respect on money. But secondly,

(52:25):
when I tell you somebody can motivate you in a
way and help you turn up ten times what you
were doing, you know what I mean. And then, unfortunately,
I'm going to say this for myself. I'm not saying
it for everybody else. I felt like in.

Speaker 3 (52:37):
My past, you know, I you know, I dated a
lot of people we see girl. We wrote a book.

Speaker 6 (52:47):
Meaning I dated people who had way more money than
me and more success to me, and I dated something
that just was kind of cool.

Speaker 3 (52:54):
It's some movie broke though.

Speaker 6 (52:56):
The issue is some women feel like, why would you
let that man go if it's a guy who had
a lot more money and success. And the issue was
he didn't care about my success. He didn't care about
me being successful. He only cared about himself. So I
remember one time when I was one of my group
when we was much younger, and we was going through

(53:18):
issues and I knew we were breaking up, and I
was starting to panic, like, oh my god, what am
I gonna do? And I was like, Okay, we need
to get more in the studio, be writing. I need
to be figuring something out. He was like, oh you good,
I got you. You don't have to be worrying about
going to the studio. Why you feel like you got
me in the studio.

Speaker 3 (53:34):
No, no, no no.

Speaker 6 (53:35):
If I would have been listening to him, child, I
would have ever did no scrubs me and Tiny wouldn't
the guy in the studio and did that, which would
have never went led into you.

Speaker 1 (53:45):
Know what he's doing right now every time he dating
somebody and they turned.

Speaker 3 (53:49):
The TV on.

Speaker 1 (53:49):
Oh oh I knew her before she was he love that?

Speaker 3 (53:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (53:54):
But so anyway, my point, no, I'm not cutting you off,
I'm sorry, but my point is just like it would
have I would have been more focused on catering to
him and what he wanted to do than to building
up myself. So you gotta find somebody who's equal parts.
You know, you gotta respect them obviously, and they're also

(54:17):
understand that you are just as important as they are
and building each other up.

Speaker 1 (54:23):
I agree.

Speaker 4 (54:24):
I want to keep it in pain, just for one
more conversation, because rejection is a thing, right in dating
and in business. A lot of us don't know how
to kind of receive a no. And we had a
really good conversation back in the back, but I want
you to kind of share a story where you were
told no in business and you persevere or pushed through
and kind of still found a way.

Speaker 3 (54:46):
Oh, I know is nothing. I always I know is nothing.

Speaker 6 (54:52):
I always tell my kids all the time. I'd be like,
so what, what's a no? You can't be afraid of
a no? Like people are you always are so fearfull
of rejection or no? Okay, if they say no, so what,
go on to the next person or figure it.

Speaker 3 (55:08):
Out, try it again. But don't let that no crush you.

Speaker 6 (55:12):
Don't let it stop you from doing your goals or whatever.
And I think that's so important to instilling our kids
to have the confidence to be able to accept a no,
respect it, and keep it pushing. You cannot let somebody's
no deter you and your movement.

Speaker 3 (55:30):
I just be like, fear equals failure.

Speaker 6 (55:33):
If you are afraid of knowing you ain't gonna do nothing,
you might as well get set on into being just
mediocre if that's what you want.

Speaker 3 (55:41):
If you scared them nos, you know what I mean.

Speaker 4 (55:43):
I want to ask both of y'all, what's harder to
hear a no in a romantic situation or a no
in a business situation. In a romantic situation, saying you
ain't gonna blow my ego uh, oh, really, I was
going a business. A knowing business is because I pride

(56:05):
myself on my work.

Speaker 1 (56:07):
A man telling me no, solf I talked to his friend.
What we talk about now, bro?

Speaker 4 (56:14):
Somebody tell me they're not available until tomorrow, and be like,
he thinks, I'm ugly?

Speaker 3 (56:19):
What okay? So to me, business knows are to be expected.

Speaker 6 (56:25):
You always gonna get a knowing business until you find
the right business partner or the right business situation.

Speaker 4 (56:31):
So to me, a knowing business is like an whatever kitty.
I like saying no to men. Let's keep those available too.
In Romantics, they got a book called The Power Yes,
the Power of No, the Power of Saying No. So
listen my mom.

Speaker 6 (56:46):
She had said that she had gave me a book
when I was a teenager with a section that was all.

Speaker 3 (56:52):
About the power of saying no because she feels like,
and I guess it is true.

Speaker 6 (56:59):
Sometimes I go above and beyond for everybody around me,
and I hate to say no or disappoint the people
around me. Right, so I end up putting myself in
a messed up situation sometimes trying to work it out
for everybody else. And then sometimes you be saying yes
to something you know from the jump you really didn't

(57:21):
want to do. So what I did learn from that
book and I still hold truth and I believe in it,
even though I don't.

Speaker 3 (57:27):
Always stick with it.

Speaker 6 (57:28):
Let's just say a friend, I ask you to do
a favor.

Speaker 3 (57:32):
It says by this book, you're.

Speaker 6 (57:35):
Supposed to say no first, like say, for instance, that
I tell you, hey, is it possible next month that
you host an event for me? And then you be like,
you know, you been like, you be like, okay, what
happens a lot of times sometimes we be like the
whole times we be.

Speaker 3 (57:53):
Up there regretting we told them.

Speaker 6 (57:54):
Yet, man, why I tell them I was gonna do this?
Then you be trying to figure out how you gonna
get out of it? How can you agree, not realizing
you made the situation worse by saying yes.

Speaker 3 (58:07):
To something you really didn't want to do.

Speaker 6 (58:10):
So basically, if you cancel on them, now you really
disappointed them and you put them in a bad situation.
So what it says is say no first, and then
when you get a little bit closer to the time,
you realize, oh, I really don't have nothing on my schedule.

Speaker 3 (58:24):
I'm really not doing anything. I can do this for them.

Speaker 6 (58:27):
You can always go back and say, hey, did you
ever find somebody to do that for you?

Speaker 3 (58:32):
Because if you still need me, I got you.

Speaker 6 (58:34):
They would appreciate that more than you agreed to doing
something that you didn't want to do and then pull
out on them later.

Speaker 1 (58:41):
We gotta test this theory out.

Speaker 3 (58:43):
Oh, I are not.

Speaker 6 (58:44):
Going to do it out on them later you show
up not really wanting to do it.

Speaker 1 (58:49):
See now I feel like I'm doing it wrong.

Speaker 4 (58:51):
A few weeks ago, someone said, hey, girl, can you
help me move? And instead of saying no, I said,
did you call anybody else yet?

Speaker 3 (59:01):
Anyway? I did it?

Speaker 4 (59:02):
But see I should have said no. All right, we're
gonna move into our progression. And this is just a
personal question that I wanted to ask anyways, So this
is this is my question. You got into Broadway. So
your production company has been a part of Othello, The Whiz,
the Piano Lessons, Thoughts of a Colored Man. For me,

(59:23):
Othello has my favorite white and my favorite black. It
has Dinzel Washington and Jake Gillhall. I need to know
what it was like whose decision it was to cast
both of those two.

Speaker 3 (59:34):
People in Othello.

Speaker 1 (59:37):
Passed how hard it was. Okay, Dizel is Denzel.

Speaker 6 (59:42):
Okay, So first of all, that was an amazing experience
to be a part of.

Speaker 3 (59:48):
At Denzel brought the opportunity.

Speaker 6 (59:52):
Oh so he back when we were doing the piano lesson.

Speaker 3 (59:57):
His son was starring in our show and he was talking.

Speaker 6 (01:00:01):
So basically we would see Denzel's some time, you know,
because he was a part of what's going on as you.

Speaker 3 (01:00:08):
Know, the whole production. So he became cool with Brian Morland, who.

Speaker 6 (01:00:15):
Is also my mentor and our lead producer, and he
told Brian that he wanted to do come Back on Broadway,
and he wanted to do Odello in particular, so it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:25):
Was his idea, okay. And then from there it.

Speaker 6 (01:00:30):
Was just a short list of, you know, people that
he would possibly want to work with, Jake being the
first one.

Speaker 3 (01:00:36):
And Jake immediately.

Speaker 1 (01:00:38):
Said yes, Jake was the first one on his list.

Speaker 3 (01:00:41):
Yeah, oh wow.

Speaker 6 (01:00:43):
I mean, you know, you have to have a couple
of people in mind, but yeah, do we.

Speaker 1 (01:00:46):
Get to know one Jane and Tato Ryan Gosling who
was the other cute white.

Speaker 4 (01:00:51):
Boy almost Yeah, yeah, I'm not I didn't know, I'm
not going there.

Speaker 1 (01:00:56):
Yeah, you know with what we've been able to watch
your journey. I think something that would really be helpful
for all of us if there's a small piece of
financial advice that maybe was given to you or something
you've learned along the way, Because I find that my
biggest advice I give to people is I had a
real broke mindset of I'm not putting money away in

(01:01:19):
my four one K line, I need to keep what
I got.

Speaker 3 (01:01:21):
I was very scared to let money.

Speaker 1 (01:01:23):
Go in my young net keeping what you got though,
but not when you're younger, you don't necessarily make the
greatest decision. You don't want to see the money leave.
You feel like, all right, well I need money for XYZ.
You really have to learn how to budget. So that,
to me is the thing that I tell everybody. What's
a piece of financial advice you could offer to all
of us today that you think would be helpful no
matter where you're at in your financial journey.

Speaker 3 (01:01:44):
How ot are you? I'm thirty four? Okay, all right?

Speaker 6 (01:01:49):
So I would say I started putting my money into
investments heavy in my twenties and and I look at
that money as it doesn't exist.

Speaker 3 (01:02:04):
So yeah, So meaning once it's put away.

Speaker 6 (01:02:08):
Whether you put it away, your sayings, the four one k,
whatever investment you put it in, that money does not exist.

Speaker 3 (01:02:15):
And when it goes up and down, don't touch it.

Speaker 6 (01:02:19):
Because you at an age that he eventually is going
to go back up. I've seen him, you know, the
market drop and then everybody panic it.

Speaker 3 (01:02:27):
Oh my god, oh my god.

Speaker 6 (01:02:29):
Don't touch it, you know, and then you have to
manage the rest of the money you get. So I
was always I feel like I was better with money
in my younger years than I am now, to be honest,
I used to really like budget to the very penny
in my as a teenager, and I used to read
like finance books and stuff like that, so that, you know,

(01:02:51):
hoping I ain't gonna be broke one day like a
lot of entertainers do.

Speaker 1 (01:02:55):
So she said, y'all scrub too.

Speaker 3 (01:03:02):
No, it'd be a lot of broke entertainers and.

Speaker 1 (01:03:05):
It'd be sad to see because it's sad.

Speaker 6 (01:03:07):
Girl move out in the mansion. Just got a nice
little luxury apart all. So it's multiple things. I feel
like it's so many things we could do on finance,
But I'm trying to figure out where to begin.

Speaker 3 (01:03:17):
Okay, I don't know. I think what you said was real. Yeah,
you put it away and you don't touch it.

Speaker 6 (01:03:22):
The other thing, and I told them on the stage yesterday,
is just simple things to stop yourself from being a spender.
You have to have bank accounts at two separate banks.

Speaker 3 (01:03:35):
You need to have your spending money account at one
bank and you can put your cash chef on that one.
Don't put your.

Speaker 6 (01:03:41):
Bill money and your savings money at that same bank.
So if you ever overdraft, like let's see your account
go low, they can't overdraft into your savings period at out.
They can't overdraft into your bill money and take that out.
It's in two separate banks. So definitely do that other thing.

(01:04:03):
You know, you gotta always live below your means if
you are saving. I hate what people talking about. Oh
I have this idea, but I don't have that. You know,
I don't have the money to get it started. Well,
you've been talking about that idea for years, honey. How
much have you saved towards it. It's like we forget
a little bit as up to one day be a

(01:04:24):
lot of bit. You know what I'm saying for you,
you need to begin in one of those life as.

Speaker 3 (01:04:30):
Oh stuff, I'm doing good now, Candy day.

Speaker 6 (01:04:33):
You need to get one of them life insurance investment
policies right now, y'all.

Speaker 1 (01:04:36):
When I did that life insurance and I had to
do my little blood test, I was like, oh, they
want to make sure I'm not on the road to death.

Speaker 3 (01:04:43):
That it was crazy for me. And I tell you, like, learning.

Speaker 1 (01:04:46):
About how you can borrow against life insurance was very
helpful for me as well.

Speaker 6 (01:04:51):
And it protects you if somebody sue you one day,
they can't sue your life insurance.

Speaker 1 (01:04:55):
Oh oh, she's feeling all the tea. Good to know,
good to know.

Speaker 3 (01:04:59):
I want to too many things and we get sorry
we start talking about money. We're gonna go too far.

Speaker 1 (01:05:04):
You know, here's a simple question about money. You were
talking about, you know, making sure you was budgeting back
in the day. Is there a broke meal that you
add from back in the day that you still like
to eat?

Speaker 3 (01:05:14):
Yes, ramen noodle.

Speaker 6 (01:05:17):
That's how all us you know, for your little meat thing,
and sometimes you dice that thing up, put some whatever,
you put.

Speaker 3 (01:05:24):
Some meat in there. It's a whole meal. I love it.
I love it.

Speaker 1 (01:05:28):
I want to ask a question.

Speaker 3 (01:05:29):
Real cheese my favorite.

Speaker 1 (01:05:31):
But oh no, I put all of that in mine.

Speaker 4 (01:05:32):
I put capers in mind, Guardley, I'll be making it
all like fancy.

Speaker 1 (01:05:37):
I do the little jelly egg. You like when you
do the little jelly egg.

Speaker 3 (01:05:40):
Now you're mixed, aren't you.

Speaker 4 (01:05:42):
We're not gonna do this, do this and m and
they said capers. I like capers.

Speaker 3 (01:05:51):
Hey, we a lot.

Speaker 1 (01:05:52):
We could be part of assence.

Speaker 3 (01:05:53):
That's how we mixed enough.

Speaker 4 (01:05:55):
A lot of us believe that legacy is left with
your children. However, you have things that are going to
outlive you, your children, their children. What does legacy look like
for candy birds? And how do you want people to
remember you?

Speaker 1 (01:06:11):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (01:06:15):
Well, I want people to remember me as a woman
who always well that I always looked out for people.
That I accomplished a lot, but I brought people along
the way, every step along the way, and uplifted other
people to also be successful. And they're a lot for

(01:06:38):
my community. I try to make sure my kids are
doing good. And yeah, I always go against the grain.
I live outside the box. I mean, yeah, we do too.

Speaker 3 (01:06:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:06:50):
Now, while we're in these final moments of the power section,
and I'm truthful I like that dependent, Like I'm dependable.

Speaker 3 (01:07:01):
So you asked me to do something, I do it.

Speaker 6 (01:07:03):
So back to the thing about telling people know, I
always end up being a person to be like, damn,
I want to tell them that, but I still come through.

Speaker 3 (01:07:09):
I don't leave people. Can we shoot our shot?

Speaker 1 (01:07:13):
Can't he? When you in New York, You're gonna do
an episode of Decisions Decisions with us?

Speaker 3 (01:07:18):
Sure, y'all. Listen, y'all.

Speaker 6 (01:07:21):
I was scared to come out here the day because
I was like, Oh, what they gonna say about Wait,
what are they gonna say?

Speaker 3 (01:07:27):
They has me on the blogs by the end of
the afternoon.

Speaker 1 (01:07:31):
Honestly, I think we would for us when when you
interview someone you love. I think a lot of problems
with shows today is they want this gotcha moment, let
me stump you, let me have this moment. I would
rather an amazing time with someone I care about, say, like,
I want to know that they want to come back.
I want to know they feel celebrated, Like your.

Speaker 3 (01:07:49):
Energy was good. It was.

Speaker 1 (01:07:50):
This ain't about a gotcha moment.

Speaker 4 (01:07:51):
We were like so honored to just be able to
have this conversation with you here at Essence Fest, Like
it's incredible.

Speaker 3 (01:07:57):
Sure, and I'm gonna have to break.

Speaker 6 (01:07:59):
I'ma have the red candicoat and Knights back just so
I could bring y'all on.

Speaker 4 (01:08:02):
Yo, y'all see y'all miss Candicote and Knights because.

Speaker 3 (01:08:05):
We do listen.

Speaker 1 (01:08:07):
Yeah, some questions for you, Okay, So the power question
I've got for you. I think when we see people
with money and fame and beauty and status, that's power.
What's been the most powerful moment in your life?

Speaker 3 (01:08:24):
Whoa the most powerful the thing that made you feel
like I'm that.

Speaker 6 (01:08:33):
I feel like I had a few moments in my
life that stood out to me because I mean, every
moment is important for different reasons. But I feel like
when I was the first woman to win the NAACP
Songwriter of the Year for the Rhythm and Soul Words,

(01:08:57):
I was shocked first of all, because I was like,
no other woman has done it.

Speaker 3 (01:09:00):
I was like wow. But I think that kick.

Speaker 6 (01:09:03):
Started in me something to be like, Okay, I always
like to be the first. Now I like, well, I
don't like to be the first, because I feel like
it should get so a point where that's not taboo
for women or black women or black you know, for
it to be the first.

Speaker 3 (01:09:20):
But if somebody got to be the first, it's gone.
Let it be me. I'll take it. I read away.

Speaker 4 (01:09:26):
We acted like, let me make first New York Times
best sellers.

Speaker 3 (01:09:29):
I don't care who wrote a book. JK.

Speaker 4 (01:09:31):
Rowland, the Oprah, we did it.

Speaker 6 (01:09:35):
I love that for y'all. I think that is so.
I've never written a book, and people always like, oh,
you should write a book, you should write a book,
And I'm like, I don't even know what it would
be about because I'm in so many y'all will help.

Speaker 3 (01:09:46):
You would y'all read Kendy's book.

Speaker 1 (01:09:49):
Hold on, wait, let's get a little quick survey. If
Candy wrote a book, what would you want to read about?

Speaker 3 (01:09:58):
Oh help you girl.

Speaker 2 (01:10:00):
Sex, loving, money, Candy period.

Speaker 3 (01:10:04):
We want to talk about today.

Speaker 1 (01:10:05):
You got one finances okay, last one?

Speaker 3 (01:10:09):
You got one?

Speaker 1 (01:10:10):
You said, finances don Jeon Honey, sex Dongeon Honey and
sex son. You said, forgetting a bunch of shee girl.
All right, we'll be the co authors. We will have it.

Speaker 3 (01:10:22):
I love it now.

Speaker 4 (01:10:23):
Well, Candy, thank you so so so very much for
joining us on stage.

Speaker 3 (01:10:28):
Y'all give it up for Candy.

Speaker 4 (01:10:29):
Y'all thank you, and we are really, really really excited
to see what else you have coming out next.

Speaker 3 (01:10:36):
Thank you so much.

Speaker 1 (01:10:37):
Is there anything that you could tell us, like anything?

Speaker 3 (01:10:39):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (01:10:39):
Yes, So my husband and I, y'all, we've been producing
movies and stuff. We have two more movies that are
about to come out. I can't well the one that
just posted a link on my story, I mean in
my bio and it's in Todds bio. It's called Don't
Bring y'all Mantle Atlanta.

Speaker 1 (01:11:00):
No you are ye wait, we should host a screening, bro,
Don't Bring.

Speaker 3 (01:11:09):
You are gonna love this movie.

Speaker 6 (01:11:12):
It's starring Mel Monga is in it, Bamby's in it, Michael.

Speaker 3 (01:11:19):
Easily that Bolo's in it.

Speaker 6 (01:11:23):
Now, I know y'all thinking that it's gonna be some
It's gotta be some wild stuff, but it's not as
wild as you made.

Speaker 3 (01:11:31):
Well, yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 6 (01:11:32):
You don't see the trailer right now, I would say,
go to Todd his Instagram page Todd t O D
D one sixty seven in the Bodo just click the
links so you can sign up to be.

Speaker 3 (01:11:45):
The first to get see the trailer. You'll find from it.
I get my phone.

Speaker 1 (01:11:51):
I'm so excited for that.

Speaker 4 (01:11:53):
Once again, y'all give it up for candy First, y'all

Speaker 3 (01:12:01):
Conducts is simple reduan doing between the deep