July 28, 2025 • 54 mins
This week Mandii & Weezy are going solo again! Mandii kicks things off with her thoughts on Othello on Broadway. After that, Weezy unpacks the stress of making birthday plans. They also break down “The Fajitas Paradox” (yes, it’s a thing), showing up in a completely different fit, and share a powerful excerpt from their New York Times bestseller No Holes Barred, diving into what a healthy relationship really looks like. Things take a wild historical turn as they explore ancient fertility rituals and ask: were Greek gods actually real? To top it all off, the ladies share their favorite kind of nut — and it’s not what you think.
OUT NOW “No Holes Barred: A Dual Manifesto Of Sexual Exploration And Power” w/ Tempest X!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say
decision decisions. It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty.
You definitely say to welcome, welcome to the new podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Oh wait, you want to say together decisions decisions.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
How are sow?
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Welcome to decisions Decisions and scene.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
I'm your girl, mandyb I'm weezy, and all I want
to know is did you meet Denzel?
Speaker 1 (00:23):
I didn't get to meet Denzel, and I was so sad.
But let me.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Tell you how to hold everything in me to not
literally lean forward and go like this, because that's how
close I was to the stage. I had an inner
moment of being like, Okay, bitch, this is what you
work hard for. Because I was so excited to be
able to go see Othello when it was on Broadway
(00:48):
and literally my seat was bb I will say I
was mad though, because uh, I got so scared last
year with going to the hospital and having a kidney
infection that I had to the bathroom daring Act one
and bitch because I was second row and they entered
through the orchestra, No, bitch, I couldn't go back to
my seat. So Act one thirty five minutes. I watched
it on a thirty two inch TV downstairs by the bathroom,
(01:12):
but I got Act two is the best act anyways, but.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
It was you know what the line came they let
you go. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
No, the actors were entering through the orchestra, so so
like because they were doing that, they couldn't have people.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
If you were orchestra and bitch you got up, you
couldn't where it's the five hundred.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Oh by the way, I want to give a little
tip to anyone if this happens again.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
It's no longer on Broadway. Ended on June eighth, But
if you guys.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Want to see a Broadway show and the ticket seemed
to be a lot, if you have the ability for
someone to just go to the box office and by
the ticket.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
I paid four ninety nine for my seat. I literally
at it was with me.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Right after I bought it, I went on step hub
to see that same row eight eighty six. So I
literally saved almost four hundred dollars by getting my ticket
at the box office.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Ticket master got the feed.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Y'all gotta just say okay, now, oh, I did want
to say, uh huh.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
If y'all listened to.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
The cinema where we talked about sinners.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
I felt the same, a bitch need the subtitles or
was a.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
Little upset that they didn't speak in modern day English.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
How would they do the subtitles in a flame?
Speaker 3 (02:26):
Well, bitch, I don't know what there's there's a they
got listening assistance and shit. I was like, can if
I could have had something to where it was broken
down in like modern day talk? So here was my
thing about the show. Denzel phenomenal. He was way better
on this than he was the Gladiator. Like on Gladiator,
I felt like, Nigga, you and Rome while you sound
(02:48):
like you from Brownsville, Like I felt like he didn't
even try to sound like I felt like we didn't
even try to sound Roman, bitch.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
But he sounded very Shakespeare.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
However, the show took place in modern time, which was confusing.
So set design, they wore US marines like costumes and
stuff like that, but then the props were very dated.
And then in one of the things, he was like,
I'm gonna put you on a plane. So I'm like, bitch,
are they in Venice and Cyprus and Shakespearean times or not?
(03:18):
Like there was a confusion a little bit for me there,
but Jake Jillhome, I ain't.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Gonna hold you.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
It looked it looked heavy as I don't know, maybe
it ain't. I know he say he don't watch his legs,
but he did. Yeah, he came out and say he
didn't watch his legs, and I was like, I watched him.
For him, it looked heavy. I will say that I'm
a hood boger and I'm embarrassed to say, so Othello.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
For those of you who don't know.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
The reason also outside of Denzel and Jake as to
why I wanted to see this play on stage is
not because I'm as Shakespeare buff, but one of my
fever films. And y'all are just gonna laugh at this
at this point at my film selection is OH based
on OH was based on Othello?
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Look it up, y'all.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
It's with Makai Fifer and Julia Styles and so because
and instead of them being like General's bitch.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Makai Fifer is the star basketball.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
But so it was giving like Hamilton, how it's old
in time but new school, like it felt like it
shouldn't have Like I'm like like if these no, I
loved it.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
I didn't say I didn't like it. I just think
that the set design was odd. And I'm like, if
we and modern times make these niggas speak more English,
like not Shakespeare in English, but like English English. So literally,
as I'm watching it, did you go by yourself? I
went by myself? Absolutely? And it was dope because the
lady next to me was probably like seven or eighty.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
She was like, I go to place all the time
by myself. Which movie? Yeah, I loved it.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
So for those of y'all who don't know othello, I
want to give it to y'all in like a urban take, okay.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Because I felt so ghetto daring.
Speaker 3 (05:06):
Act two is when all the drama takes place, and
so I'm watching it like, oh no, she didn't like
I'm literally like scary movies.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
I'm gagged.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
I'm gagged. And so basically you got a general, a
black general, which was Denzel. So Denzel marries this girl, Desdemona,
who's like the daughter of someone really high up right
in the game, let's say that really high up. So
(05:38):
this black general marries marries her without telling her father
or anything. So the father find out and it's like, now,
why you married this nigga without telling me who the
fuck is this. So anyways, we meet them in a
setting where the father finds out and they are in
the middle of something professional, war wise, work wise, whatever.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
But basically we I met with Iago. Iago is looking to.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Become second in line after after Denzel's character Othello like
comes down. So Iago's like his right hand man, Iago
like doing everything loyal, trying to kind of brown nose
his way to take Othello's position.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Well a little did this, Nigga.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
No.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Othello was like, yeah, no, I'm giving a job to Cassius.
So Cassius is next in line.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Iago med as fuck cause he's like, bitch, I should
be next. So Iago, who's who you think is loyal?
Who Othello believes to be his friend is? So is
so angry and upset at Othello for not choosing him
to be next in line.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
That bitch.
Speaker 3 (06:46):
He started putting little things in his ear, like yo,
bitch sleeping with Cassius. And so we're in this like
play where Othello's like, no, not my woman, Cassius. Cassius
didn't do that to me, mind you. Cassius over there
fucking on a little woman of the night. He got
a hold, Jezebel, a little hope or whatever. Basically, Iago
(07:08):
start setting little things, put some shit in Cassius's room.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Othello finds out.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
He's like, there's no way that would end up in
his room without my woman leaving it there. By the way,
Mandy is saving you guys five hundre dollar because I
didn't know we gonna get the whole poll.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
No, it's Shakespeare. No, this ain't no spoiler. It's it's Shakespeare.
So like it's it's everywhere, Like I'm just telling y'all
if you can't understand Shakespeare in English, like me, just
the tea. So basically, then Denzelle's heartbroken, like Cassius, you
betrayed me.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Iaga, Like what you want to do?
Speaker 1 (07:45):
You want me to go kill that nigga?
Speaker 3 (07:47):
So then Iago set up to go kill Cassius because
now he feels like this is a way for him
to get the job that Cassius is about to get.
So bro, he gonna send one of his niggas to
go kill Cassius. He believes Cassie got murked bitch and
did it. But Othello don't know that yet. All O'thello
know is I can't have no Hoe as a.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Wife, Othello is Denzel, so bitch. Next scene, Othello pull
up to the room his bitch sleep. He kissed her
because he's like, bitch, you got to go. So she
wakes up and it is literally telling him, bro, I
ain't fucking Cassius.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
You sitting here acting like I cheated on you.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
I didn't cheat on you. I don't know why you
think I cheated on you. He said, bitch, you lying.
You got to go, so bitch, he literally kills that bitch.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Literally. You see her like so Othello like, yeah, I.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Ain't dating no Ho, you got to go kill her
as literally he kills her.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Bitch.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Come walk in his homeboy like sorry, I know we
put the hit on Cassius, but that nigga ain't die.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
And he's like, well, I just killed my fucking wife.
So a lot of fuck Cassius. Bit y'all did my job.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
How you ain't doing your job? Uh huh. So the
friend of the wife comes in and it's like.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
No, not my best friend. How you kill my best friend?
Fuck nigga, Oh I'm coming for you. Start yelling at
motherfucking Othello and Othello, like your friend was a house.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
She had to go.
Speaker 3 (09:20):
Next thing, you know, he brings up the thing that
got left in the room that Iago placed in Cassia's room,
and the friend was like, nah, I took it.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Mind you.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
The friend is Iago's bitch, So she's like, no, I
took I took that thing.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
She really didn't cheat on you. You just killed my friend.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
And she starts saying all the ways in which she like,
actually did this and is now realizing Iago did it, bitch.
Iago walk over to her, slice her neck.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
Bitch, you talking too much. You got to go.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
So then the arms come in and it's like Iago,
this fuck nigga, we know you set up to kill Cassius.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
You just killed this bitch. They have him in chambers,
bitch now like he's trying to get out. It looks
like the Chicken man. He's trying to get out.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
So everybody's in the scene now and Denzel realizes he
about to go to jail.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
He about to lose his little his little things.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
Cassius is about to take over, and he's like, you
know what, I just killed this bitch. Y'all gonna talk
about me. I'm about to be disbarred now from and
that's not even disbarred. What is it when you get
taken out.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Of the army? So he kills himself, bitch, yes, discharged.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
So he's literally like every which way that I have
been an honorable man will now be ruined. I can't
live on this earth as an unhonorable man, dishonorable man, whatever.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
And he's like, who kill himself? So, bitch, you literally
watch it.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
It's like damn, everybody did and in scene and I'm
just like, damn, I know I remember watching oh, and
it's why I enjoyed it so much.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
And I was like the same way. We have the
same tropes.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
With like the secretary who fucks with the man and
tries to kill the wife because she now wants to
be the wife role. Like y'all know the Beyonce movie
that we've seen in thirty different renditions. I'm like, I
don't know if it's on two b, I don't know
where it's at, But I want to know why we
haven't seen more renditions of modern.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Day Othello's no dude.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
That ship was That ship was a tent like and
it reminded me. It reminded me of like the books
and and things that I used to read that had
sex love betrayal, and also at the same time, how
you literally could see something and completely miss it and
get it wrong because of your own peripheral vision to
(11:47):
a not believe somebody. I think like, it was literally,
it's a tragedy. It's it's it's literally a tragedy. Shut
the fuck up, Edden.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
It's literally a tragedy. But as I was watching it,
I was like, ooh, t this nigga line.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Oh, this bitch really ain't cheating, but she'd being accused
of cheating, and then this nigga so heartbroken, you gonna
kill her. I was like, I need, I need more
of this, and so maybe I just need to read
some more books.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
Come out so you could understand centers. No, no, no
old English was no.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Let's be very clear.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
In my head, I'm like Denzel macay Pfeiffer does does Madino?
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Does the Dino? Whatever? Does the Mona?
Speaker 3 (12:26):
That's Julia Stiles diss the White Man with the Dark
Hair in the movie.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
I'm literally watching it and only know what's happening.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
I'm watching it actually like the tele novella, it's given espono,
it's given a language I don't understand.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
I think you probably just need to watch more old
movies because or like medieval times, because I was struggling
in the middle the middle of Game of Thrones and
then it went away.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
Now I can watch anything like that.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
There's different languages, there's different like at the accent different like,
so once you watch it, it's like understanding Southern people. Once
you down there, you start getting it, baby. But I
like it, like I don't think I like Shakespearean lingo.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Like actually, like for.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
The way that he was talking, and it was like, Bro,
you just said all the words to say nothing bitch.
I was like, we could have cut this down of
like two sentences instead it was like three paragraphs.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
It's so crazy how actors memorize all that shit. What's
crazy about you? Seeing Othello last night? My friend had
a birthday party last night and in Walks there was
more like celebrities there. Jeremy o'harris walks in and the
best play I've ever seen with slave play.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
And he didn't know he was.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
She had a party and a rooftop in Central Park,
and I could tell he didn't know was somebody's birthday party.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
He was just chilling. I was like this right, and
she's like, I mean, is he going to take a picture?
And You're like, how do you know Jeremy and her?
She's like who that? And I was like, you don't
understand who is it? So he's seeing my face and
I'm like, jagged, bitch, did you see him?
Speaker 4 (13:55):
I think I did see him. Yeah, oh my god,
later in the night.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Yeah with the fro. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Bro Let me tell you writers, directors, filmmakers, they're about
to become the new ship.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
I just found out.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I'm going to a party on Friday and Writing Coogler's invited.
I'm trying to figure.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
Out my speech. I'm not gonna bring it up unless
it just so happens.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Will I have too many cocktails to where I say
you can rob trains and play.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
I hit him with that line that what am I.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
Gonna do is everybody gonna bring it up? Am I
just gonna be the one that don't bring it up?
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Am I gonna like play cool and try to be like,
la bitch, My nigga is gonna be there, So it's
not like I'm trying to fuck. How am I gonna
let this person know? I think you made one of
the best movies of all time.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
You can just say that.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
No, I don't want bring it up or do like
your rendition of sinners.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
No, I gotta wash up what you mean?
Speaker 4 (14:38):
Oh my god?
Speaker 2 (14:40):
Okay, So I want to talk about birthdays really quick.
This girl throws a birthday party my homegirl, Gabrielle.
Speaker 4 (14:48):
I'm sorry, I'm not mad at him laughing. It was
just a birthday. Yeah, I love this.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
It's a ketchup.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Yeah, so birthdays. Friend throws a party for thirty first
birthd day on a roof. She calls me this morning,
and I'm sure she would repeat this story, but I
think it's the same old tale as time. And I
want everybody who's got a birthday coming up to hear
this story and let you know you got a chill.
I was like, how is your night? Because I took
(15:16):
her mom home and my mom home. She said, girl,
I am so tired. I will never do a birthday
party again. I don't want to do this. At one point,
I wanted to lock myself in the bathroom. I was
talking to too many people. Yeah, I cannot believe I
put myself through this. I'm like, damn, I'm so sorry
to hear this because you looked beautiful. All your friends
(15:38):
are there supporting you. I hate that you feel like this.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
She's like, next year, I don't even I just want
to do a trip with my friend. Maybe two, maybe three.
Maybe I need to go myself. Like she was like, overload.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
What is the thing? Is it that we don't have
anything else to celebrate when we get older? Why is
it that we keep planning these fucking things with all
these people? Birthdays become so fucking stressful. I felt so
sorry for this morning, Nandy. I literally was like, oh
my god, you want to go to lunch? No, I
want to go sweet, I don't need anything.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
It's like the exhaustion of hosting.
Speaker 4 (16:09):
A lot was going on.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
I mean I've been said this, Yeah, like most of
the times, I don't want to know my birthday Like yeah,
he literally literally I I So. I pulled up on
Eden's birthday and he wasn't DJing.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
You weren't you weren't working that night. I literally just
dj No, he wasn't eve DJing, but he just had everyone.
He had everyone pull up.
Speaker 3 (16:29):
So and this was during fashion week and I was like, oh,
Edit's birthday, let me make sure I'll pull in and
I pull in, and I think maybe as soon as
I got there is just when the flood of his
friends came in, and I remember going to the bar like, Eden,
what do you want to drink? As soon as I
ordered he we did our shot literally immediately, literally and
I was only there for like fifteen maybe twenty minutes.
(16:53):
He looked at me and was like, because everyone came
at the same time, everyone was like happy birthday. And
then everyone started bringing him shots.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
And he said, help me. It was bad, and I
saw his face. It's a terror. Why do we do that?
Speaker 4 (17:07):
I mean, she looked like she was having fun too,
but I understand the sense of being overwhelmed. There's too
much attention is a thing.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
Doubt.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yeah. She even said at one point, like every time
I wanted to dance, I took a picture, somebody was
taking a picture with me. I was like, babe, mind
you Gabrielle's model, Like this is her job to take photos.
She said, so many times I just want to dance,
but you know you're really hosting. You're making sure everybody
else is having a good time. I feel so big
(17:39):
because when she was on a hunker plane and I
was like, girl.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Almost another one everybody has a better time at your
party than you.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
I mean, it's not even on the dance floor the
whole time.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
It's not even just birthday parties.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Though I hear this a lot as the sentiment around
weddings like that the wedding is essentially for everyone else
to celebrate, like the reception the wedding, and it's not
really about the couple.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
It's about let's be very.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
Clear, everyone there is gonna judge the venue, the food,
the DJ, is the bar open, and is it top
shelf or not? Like everyone makes it about them and
so it in turn becomes a party for everyone else,
and it normally isn't fun like I think that. And
I just saw a statistic about even how many couples
(18:25):
end up actually having sex the night of their wedding,
and it's a very low percentage because they're both.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
No, it wasn't not low, but it was low enough.
I think we talked about it horrible it was. It
was in the fifty or something, so it wasn't that low,
but it really wasn't as much as we think.
Speaker 4 (18:39):
Whenever I do consultations for DJing weddings, and I actually
got one coming up in May, right, I tell them.
I'm like, congratulations, I'm glad it's a special day, but
I know it's going to be stressful because at the
end of the day, it's really for everyone else. It's
all the pictures they take the bride in the groom, barelead,
especially the bride because it's they're specially they trying to
have the dress on everything like that, and outfit's a
lot exactly, and then the speeches and then the drinks.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
It's so crazy guys are bringing up weddings.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Because after she vented for like fifteen minutes with me,
the next thing out of her mouth, this girl's not engaged.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
She said, eloping is going to be great. That's what
she said.
Speaker 2 (19:12):
Because the next thing you think is, oh, I'm not
gonna be able to do this. Like I'm gonna tell you.
It really showed me how much we throw parties for
everyone else and we want to get our people together.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
It's too much.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
Like this year on my birthday, mine kind of went
the other way. So I got a big ass fucking
house for all my friends to come.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
Christ.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
This is what I think people should do on their birthdays, right,
I'm like, just get the house and bite people on
the trip, they buy the ticket.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
I did that for my thirty thing. Still Nope, I'll
never do it again.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
So it was five bedrooms, Me and my man Kill
and her husband Andre, It was Vannie and I think
Mea and her husband. Just a bunch of friends, right, girls,
didn't you know about end a trip? It was too
Andre got book for an event, Vinnie had.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
To go viewed his mom. Everybody was like and it
was real life shit plans we had for months, you know.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
I know I felt bad. I did all this booking
my thirtieth birthday. I have friends travel from the Carolinas, Vegas, London, Atlanta,
two from Vegas, one from and went from Miami.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
There was I think seven of us.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
We fly into Mexico during a hurricane. House gets canceled,
boat gets canceled.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
And now they know how I am. Guess what.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
They all land right before me. And so because they
all know how I get in my anxiety, they all
come together and are trying to find us another house
because Mexico is trying to send everyone to a fucking
stadium like on some bunker down type shit I mean,
And so literally we ended up going shopping. We end
up still doing the boat, but the waters were still choppy.
(20:47):
But literally dinner, dinner, reservation, everything, what.
Speaker 4 (20:51):
You got on a boat?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
No?
Speaker 1 (20:53):
No, no, no. Two days later, wait no, the hurricane passed.
It came and passed.
Speaker 4 (20:58):
I still wouldn't got down on a boat for another week.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
Nigga. I was in Mexico. How would that be out
We're from Florida. Those Yeah, a hurricane. You go out
that night, Let's be very clear. I'll say, let's be
very clear. A party.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
We we got through the night hurricane passed. I look outside,
I said, also, little a couple of branches on it.
Speaker 1 (21:18):
We could have win.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
I literally was real. Florida, Like, bro, they's so extra.
They always do this when hurricanes come.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
It ain't even that serious.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Oh, speaking of birthdays, I was literally thinking, okay, so
this whole thing's going on right. My boyfriend for his
birthday that week, we're going on a cruise. I was like, oh,
he's never done one. I've done a munch with my
family back in the day.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
This will be cute. From La Easy. Something came up
with my job. They're very big gigs.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
One of the days we've bet on the boat, and
I was like, you know, what if we were married.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
He would tell me.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Do this gig like that's how much money it is.
He would be like, bitch, are you out of your mind?
So I called him, I told him what was going on.
He was like, listen, I feel like you want to
do so much for me because I do so much
for you. I need you to understand this type of
man I am. I'm gonna tell you again. We can eat,
we can sit in the hotel room. I can be
(22:22):
right there while you do this event, even if it
was on my birthday. You have got to stop overthinking
these big events in life. And like I realized, my
love language is gift giving so much that sometimes it's
not translating because the way that I'm like to be
shown up for what he's doing is the same thing
I'm doing. Is that how many times I tell you
(22:45):
we can do nothing, we can go to eat, we
could go see a movie, Please stop thinking so deeply.
And I was really feeling guilty because number One, when
we plan something for someone or when we're trying to
do a.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
Gesture, it really is about them.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
However I do at the same time, and this could
be something that's totally wrong and it's semi related to
your ex partner with throwing you the birthday party. I
want you to know I'm doing this for you and
I want you to really feel my love from this,
almost more than my brain can even think.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Are you enjoying this? I want you to feel it.
I guess it could.
Speaker 2 (23:25):
It's selfish, but it's like I don't know how else
to show up sometimes because I am such a pleaser.
And it was just this whole conversation of like, bitch,
you wear cancel a vote and we just doing dinner.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
Now I didn't. I found out a way to move
the event, but I say this.
Speaker 4 (23:39):
To say move the event.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Yeah, I was like, figure out another time to do it,
and I charge them less money. But basically what I
was gonna say was like, anyone that's planning for a friend,
anyone that's planning an event, you really do have to
sit and ask maybe you're not super selfish in that
story you told us you said your ex was.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Like, what about what I wanted to do? Those words
feel selfish?
Speaker 2 (24:01):
Maybe I'm not saying those words, but am I actually
being selfish? And we really got to sit with ourselves,
like are all the grand gestures you're making, and all
the plans you're trying to make actually not something that
person wants. And I haven't really sat with myself in
a while and thought that because I'm just trying to
be a mirror of what he's doing for me. I mean,
I do think that there's a difference from gifting your
(24:24):
partners something that hasn't been discussed and giving your partner
something they literally said they didn't want verbatim.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
True, Like, there's power in listening to a partner and
even if you can't afford or get them exactly what
they ask for, to give them something they literally said
they don't want because you've never done it, or it
would make you feel good, or it's a way that
you feel like you could show your love is selfish.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
And yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
Think that showing your trying to make grand gestures to
show your love is selfish.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
I think not listening is. Yeah, But that's.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Where where I thought about your exing the party, because
I'm like, oh, this is an interesting tie because mine
isn't rooted in the narcissism, but it is rooted in
me people pleasing. So it's like these two different things,
and you I could have really have shown up and
been doing something that someone's like, this is too much.
So I just realized, you know, throughout this whole thing
with a birthday conversation all that like.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
I've been doing too much. I've you doing too much.
A lot of times. I even do too much of
my parents.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
There's times where I take my mom's shop and are
we doing all these extra things? You'd be like, what
is it my fucking birthday?
Speaker 1 (25:30):
And I don't know what that is.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
I wonder if it's an only child, Oh my god,
please like me shit. But yeah, I'm starting to see
it just show up a lot.
Speaker 4 (25:38):
No, I mean, I feel like, I mean, don't I
guess the way I'm analyzing it, what you're saying, does
it sound like like me. It's more like I'm trying
to make a grand gesture.
Speaker 1 (25:47):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
I don't see it as And also, it's this thing
of life. Why are we doing all this shit for
someone that's just happy. Even if it's a homegirl and
you're planning something great for her, she might have been like, bitch,
we could have went anywhere. It's that type of shit.
It's just kind of like it's not always needed. So
I want to say that to say keep shit?
Speaker 4 (26:05):
Can I can I go on the opposite room. Have
you guys done the fijidas thing? You guys talked about
this man to make shit say the whole thing filling everybody.
So so there was a whole thing on social media
at one point talking about how you don't take too
much attention from the birthday person on their birthday. An example, right,
you go to a Mexican restaurant. I don't care whichever
(26:27):
one you guys go to. The point is the com
you see the you see the menu, there's tacos ares
burritos that ethos A discussed the etctera. You are the
birthday girl. Damn, I don't want to put you in
this for fuck it, the birthday girl. We easy orders
fajitas on that event. Now what happens when you get
the fieta?
Speaker 1 (26:47):
Everybody looks at you because it's smoking, and say.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
By looks at you because it's smoking. Now the internet
was split. Do you order the fijitas if it's not
your birthday?
Speaker 1 (26:56):
Yo? What just because the attention? Ye niggas need to
go to therapy. I ain't gonna hold you. Get the
fuck out of here.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
First off, if y'all know me, y'all know that Mexican
is the bottom three worst cuisines in the world.
Speaker 1 (27:11):
You are hate Mexican food.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
So y'all will never see me at a Mexican restaurant
for a celebration. But for me, I think, let me
take it away from the Mexican restaurant, so that I
what's an equivalent. The equivalent would be you're good dress,
so you would know the equivalent would be you are
the birthday girl. There is a theme for how y'all
(27:33):
should all dress, and someone decides that even though they
received the theme, they're going to show up in whatever
they want to wear, which in turn it's what they wanted.
They're just not listen, you know, and so they get
all the attention. Now for everyone at the table, it
don't matter how good the birthday girl is dressed, which
(27:54):
we said, we're all white, and you got on fucking
pattern or black or red maybe red, you know what
I mean, like to stand out shah, And that I
think is that's what I would say, is that's someone
that maybe shouldn't be there. To me, you ordering fajitas
just because it's sizzle pop and everyone I.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Mean, I see it's like in a what's the word
not an analogy? Yeah, it is like it's just I
get it though, because to me it's it actually is
a good outfit if it's your birthday. And let's just say, yo,
bitch got out fit and she got.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Her hair bust down and the makeup done.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
You just kind of like, oh my god, I thought
it was all about me. Bitches be getting like that,
And I saw something online to let me know.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
I love boy.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Bitches be like what they don't want their homegirl to
show them out fun their day. There is a wedding
theme saying the theme is show up the bride. My
homegirl did this for her wedding in Mexico City, Gila.
I walked in and I was like, why does everybody
look this good? She's like, oh my god. I teld
everybody like, I mean, purple, pink, green, the designs ship symmetrical,
(28:54):
sticking out.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
You know what that is? That is a bitch that
ain't insecure like to me.
Speaker 3 (28:58):
To me, also, someone out be hell subjective. I've had
friends I don't like how they dress at all, so
they show out. Is not my show out? And if
you bet that I pulled up and you like my
fit and I'm just better than you.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Bitch. You should have had a solace. I don't know
what it's. Here's one. I don't what about the homegirl
that you call your friend? What you wearing to night?
I wear jeans.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I can remember jeans. I'm cute, not as social up
in a tight dress. But you know I was gonna
put these damn jeans and take top phone. I changed
my mind because I didn't like how the jeans fit me.
Speaker 4 (29:32):
So you feel deceived.
Speaker 1 (29:34):
No, I just want to like, Oh, you should have
seen it. It's so funny. Shut it.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
No, I don't like when I step out with one
other person. If it's a few of us, it's fine.
If you're really dressing in heels and I'm wearing sneakers.
But you could have told me this. No, this was
actually funny.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
This just happened me and my homegirls Shanna shout out
to Shauna. We went to Barmargo Barmargo on my little spot.
So we go out, and we had already gone out
like three or four times before then. And sometimes I'd
be me my stun attire, I'll be dressed down. But
every time we went out. She likes to get caught up.
She's a mom, and she's like, bitch, if I'm coming
(30:09):
up in the city, I'm gonna be cute. So what's
crazy is we go to Barbargo and she's like, okay, girl,
I will pull up.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
I decide because I know this bitchman to be dressed up.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
I put on my little fucking top four heels, I
put this little flour dressed on a dress to wear.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
I showed my my boyfriend and he was like, I
didn't even know you owned anything like this. What the fuck?
Speaker 3 (30:29):
So I shows each I show up and I'm dressed
up and she said, now, bitch, why you all dressed up?
Speaker 1 (30:35):
I said, bitch, because you already dressed up. And I
felt bad that I don't be mad at yo.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
She came dressed down and she was like, bitch, I
dressed down because I knew I got to meet which'all asked.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
So's a deal unless we playing sneak.
Speaker 3 (30:48):
I guess that's different at thirty at thirty five, depending
on where we're going, we need flat no dress, dress
for dress for the occasion, Like, bitch, you might be
going to bad. I got a boyfriend, and if I
don't want to dress up. I'm gonna dress with what
makes me comfortable. Me and my friends actually now do
not ever have conversations about, well, what you're wearing, because
(31:11):
everyone has their own styles. Nine times out of ten,
I ain't gonna like half the ship my fraywhere.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
To me if we're going casual, because I do think
like if we're gonna show up casual together, like if
me and my girl, if it's a Friday night we're
going to club. If we really gonna be casual, let's
be on a ship together, beach, Let's do the crop
top and the cargo jeans together.
Speaker 4 (31:29):
Switch it up.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
Oh, you know, my best friend twist her ankle, and
I knew that hole was gonna be wearing flats for
a while.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Well, bitch, I'm wearing heels. Doc my friend I wear bitch,
lost a broke the fuck Anyway, let's get to our
no host Bart.
Speaker 3 (31:46):
If you haven't yet, guys, make sure you purchase no
host Bart to do a manifesto of sexual exploration and
power and join us on tour NHB tour dot com.
We are bringing the pages, took the stages in a
city near you. We are making it so different than
any live show you've seen before, but you were still
getting all of the horrible Okay.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Are we taking a page? Are you picking it? No?
Speaker 3 (32:10):
I am reading an excerpt. Okay, this comes from my chapter.
Why don't they just call it a vacuum? So this
is the chapter around my abortion. It's in the pain
section of the book. My mom says she wishes she'd
had this conversation with me earlier, and that it wasn't
in the form of a trauma bond. No one had
(32:32):
talked to her either, so this was part of our
familial cycle. She said she would have talked to me
earlier about the consequences and results of the actual birds
and bees.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
But here's the issue. The problem is a cyclical one.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Before she got pregnant at fifteen, no one had ever
talked to her about sex either. Those were from different generations.
My mom and I both remember being told very little
at school. She didn't have planned parenthood or any resources
at the time. In Newport, Ritchie, Florida, where she grew up.
I remember a sex ad class where we, and when
I say we, I mean the young women were told
(33:07):
by our teacher to abstain from having sex the boys
were going to be boys and the girls were going
to say angelic virgins. Somehow, math is my strong suit,
and I remember thinking about how it would work in
real time that math was not mathing. We were told
not to have sex because we would either A get pregnant,
B get HIV or some other sexually transmitted disease that
(33:31):
would make you filthy or see all the above. Well,
I was battling the multiple choice selection, and here I
was being a pregnant. I wanted to ask both of
you if there is any conversation, and I know this
may be a difficult question for you because she's no
(33:51):
longer here, but are there any conversations that you wish
you had had specifically with your mom regarding sex or
sex sooner that maybe came up later.
Speaker 4 (34:03):
I think no, no, because there typically For me, it
all came from my father as a man that I
swear the birds in the bees conversation was five seconds
that month with your dad. Yeah, and your mom never
had it, which everything I've learned in terms of sex
is from the entering.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
How are you? Oh? Wow? They had you. I wonder
if this had to do with.
Speaker 4 (34:24):
Age thirty, because it's my father's sixty.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
Okay, oh wow, so even later on we're a little
bit more mature.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
They definitely knew themselves more sexually. Yeah wow. And it
was still like five seconds and that which is.
Speaker 4 (34:35):
But but I don't condom condom? Yeah basically that's really what?
Speaker 1 (34:40):
Right?
Speaker 4 (34:40):
Yeah, like basically that just wear a condom or don't
get people pregnant.
Speaker 1 (34:44):
I'll be honest with you.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
My mom even knowing I was having sex because I
had to come and throw a positive pregnancy test on
the bed. I had wished that, and and that happened
when I was just about to turn sixteen. And for me,
that was definitely the age where instead of me being
(35:07):
told to go to the other room or anything like that,
it should have been where when her friends was over,
my aunties were over and conversations were being had because
a lot of my mom's friends and my aunts was dating.
Speaker 1 (35:21):
They weren't.
Speaker 3 (35:22):
Like again, I didn't grow up seeing healthy marriages or
people in long standing relationships.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Like my aunt wasn't with my uncle, my mom wasn't
with my dad.
Speaker 3 (35:30):
Her friends were all single bitches out you know, they
go on a playpool to find some niggas, and so
I wish just the conversation about how sex doesn't really
make someone like you happen.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
And I do wish that I knew.
Speaker 3 (35:45):
The trauma that my mom experienced with sex, with dating,
and specifically her decision to have an abortion. I wish
that conversation came without the need to trauma bond with
each other. I would have liked to known my mom
a little bit more or as a woman and not.
Speaker 1 (36:02):
Just a mom personally. What about you?
Speaker 2 (36:07):
I mean, I talked to my mom talked about sex
so early, and I'm sure we'll dig into this convo
when we interview her tomorrow, but something that's just coming
to my mind. It's interesting because like a lot of
my homegirls talk about their mom with dating experiences and
I can't relate because she was married. But the interesting
thing is, I think it's very reflective. I saw my
(36:27):
mom in her dating. Technically, every single day all I
saw was my mom and is wife, you know what
I mean. So even though I knew her as an
individual person, I think it's probably what shaped me to
be the type of person I am because she was
such a wife. Being a housewife, that's your job. Every
single day, you're showing up like that, you're being that
type of person.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
Like. It was a weird thing too, because when I.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Got older and started dating men, my homegirls and I
have of course had relationship talks. When I started dating
romantic relationships, you talk a lot more about like my
mom was saying, you know, et cetera. I didn't realize
how jaded I was to single mom. It's pain like
just because the dating experience as a mom, a kid
(37:14):
sees it completely. They're watching it, they're viewing it like
that never happened to me. I don't really know what
my mom was like in according stage when I never
really asked much about like when they met. I also
don't really know what kind of happens when she's heartbroken
or sad.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
They were in a marriage the whole time. I never
saw those phases.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
So everything I learned about that shit is just through
conversations through friends. So that's even and your parents were married, right, yeah,
so like, yeah, that's something.
Speaker 3 (37:42):
Yeah, my experience seeing that it was interesting because through
writing this book, I you know, I got to really
learn my mom more and her relationship with men, and
I remember getting so fucking mad at her and I
snapped at her as an adult now. I remember asking
her like, who, if any of the partners that I
(38:05):
know of over the past thirty years did she feel
like was her favorite or the best or the one
that she wishes lasted? And the name of the person
that she said to me calls so much trauma as
a child, like basically in their breakup, he threatened to
(38:27):
share something that led my mom to try to commit suicide,
and it like I don't want to cry with it.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
I was so mad at her.
Speaker 3 (38:36):
I said, that's the nigga, And I said, you're pathetic,
and I said, I want you to take it to therapy.
Speaker 1 (38:42):
This man that.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
Maybe you're remembering how he maybe made you feel. But
the person that at the end tried to literally ruin
our family and did somewhat like brought a lot of
things out to where you literally almost like you know,
and I had to witness that, and I was so
upset and I was like, oh, I'm sorry, this is
something recent, and I was just like, in terms of
(39:05):
the conversations with my mom about like what healthy relationships
could look like, it frustrates me that at thirty five,
I feel like I'm teaching her how to date and
value herself more and seek out a partner that's worthy
of her. And I just feel like it's in reverse
(39:27):
now because I've had this show for the last eight
years and I've been able to learn myself and I've
gone to therapy. My mom is just what is now
in therapy for the first time in her life at
fifty five.
Speaker 2 (39:38):
I think, and I mean even now we see your
mom isn't even really wrong for probably thinking it, because
we now know sometimes those highs and loads of relationships,
you really keep in mind the good yeah, you want to,
you want to, so it's almost more prevalent than the
good guys. She probably passed over that maybe you thought
about because no, no.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
No, no, let's be very clear. They all suck. Oh well,
I like that's why I was like, which which one
was the best?
Speaker 3 (40:06):
And what's crazy is the one that I liked the
most as an adult he was an alcoholic. He was
an alcoholic and a gambler. So although he was fun
and he was caring and we really like enjoyed his
presence because he was a lot of fun with my mom, financially,
he was in debt because he would either drink or
(40:27):
gamble all his money away, and so from an aspect
of he was always a great person to be around.
As an adult standpoint, he wasn't great like And it
sucks that me. Looking through the history of my mom,
I don't see any any quality in her decisions of dating,
but in talking to her as an adult and recognizing
(40:49):
the traumas of her with her stepdad, I just see
how much has passed down and what we see. A
lot of us only know what we don't want, which
is why I always say I grew up knowing I
didn't want to nigga like my daddy, but I didn't
grow up with an example of a man that I
Actually that's an example of a man.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
I do the opposite to men.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Actually, yeah, my ex said all the time, my dad,
it's like he's just pinnacle, fuck you, fuck you like
my dad.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
This, my dad this.
Speaker 2 (41:16):
And it was crazy because maybe towards the end of
my relationship not old baby, but another ex said, this
man that your dad is is so not realistic to
today's time, and it's not realistic to even the man
you're looking for. That when you compare, it's frustrating. My
dad doesn't really drink. My dad doesn't go out that like,
(41:38):
I would love someone social. I've literally said on this podcast,
I won't date someone but don't drink. And so just
thinking about it, I'm like, oh, I really am comparing
to the man that I'm not even looking for. My
dad is super chill, doesn't really care. I like someone
a little more hyper and more extroverted. Like it's crazy
because I didn't know how much I was setting a standard.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
So it's like when they really are, it's all daddy issues.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
At the same time, maybe my daddy issues may look different,
but the fact that I compared every man, it's fucked up. Oh, well,
my dad does this, he takes care of the house.
He would never let my mom do this. Like, meanwhile,
teamwork is such a normal part of twenty twenty five.
Let's be honest about the economy here. I don't even
want to be a housewife. But yet in the same breath,
I'm telling you I shouldn't be doing this because my
(42:22):
dad would never let me do it. Like, it's almost
crazy that the first impression of dating and men all
comes from this one man.
Speaker 1 (42:30):
It sucks, oh for you. Yeah, I've viewed a lot
of fun.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
No, but even in the opposite way, the impression of
men in a negative way or positive.
Speaker 1 (42:37):
That's it.
Speaker 3 (42:45):
I do want to skip reaction air for this episode
and do and get just a little bit more into
the decision's decisions because I want to have more fun
talking about it. I think it's been really fun to
teach you guys the historical kind of ways in which
certain things around sex started. And this week, y'all don't
(43:09):
make fun of me for the last one, because y'all
know I don't believe it, but we getting into it.
We were talking about fertility rituals, the so sex soil
is sacred?
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Did you so before fertility clinics?
Speaker 3 (43:22):
And again, because I've spoke about talking to my friends
about navigating their biological clock and all these things, I
wanted to get into what people were doing before they
could go and literally get tested and to see if
they could have babies or not. So before fertility clinics,
people turn to sex magic, moon phases in sacred dances.
(43:43):
That's you're real to help the babies come the moon
phases real, bitch, you believe it.
Speaker 1 (43:50):
I'm gonna tell you how I know. Read the love chapter.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
Okay, yeesh, it's scary Also, what do you mean, so
what do you know about moon phases being tied to
fertill like just.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
But all are different stages of ovulation heightened fertility like
it's crazy because we don't talk about it much anymore
because we have so many other options. But the moon
phases were like the number one resource back in the
olden times on when it was prime and optimal to
get pregnant. And our period also is connected to the
moon as.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
Well, even though we all have different cycles. Yes, interesting,
goddamn very interesting there is.
Speaker 1 (44:30):
Don't believe it's not the oh Freddian cycle.
Speaker 2 (44:33):
I believe not to be a hotel because I learned
this watching nineteen Keys clip. It was a nigga talking
meant to be very hotel.
Speaker 1 (44:41):
Oh no, no, no, I thought this motherfucker is bullshit.
Speaker 2 (44:46):
He wasn't saying it was somebody out on them like
this nigga sounds stupid talking about pussy and furies, and
I was like, oh, I guess not. Well, let's start
as long as you got a coofie on off of
the talk shit.
Speaker 1 (44:54):
But some of it be good, some of it don't.
Let's start with the with some historical hot spots.
Speaker 3 (45:00):
Now, y'all know, we'd be liking to take y'all around
the world, no passport needed. So in ancient Mesopotamia, it's
always over there. Where is Mesopotamia? That's a real place. No,
it was, It don't exist no more. I think it
is the Roman or greeklan. Sorry, we're gonna let y'all
know where y'all at. It's a bottom of Mediterranean seat
(45:22):
in the Persian Gulf.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
Iraq, Iraq, Yeah, bitch, it exists in a bombs cataline empire.
Speaker 1 (45:33):
That was all it.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Today Mesopotamia is actually known as present day Iraq, So bitch,
we in Iraq.
Speaker 1 (45:41):
Uh this only time y'all gonna be able to go there,
all right?
Speaker 3 (45:44):
So the goddess Inana's high priestess would perform sacred sex
rituals with kings to ensure a fertile kingdom. This was
called called heroes gamos. So basically I think it's heroes
or none. No, I'm saying the game, look.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
At me making the Spanish it probably.
Speaker 3 (46:09):
And yeah, so I guess now here's the thing. Were
goddesses real things? The goddess, yes, would perform sacred rituals.
Goddesses was real? I thought gods and goddesses was fake.
Speaker 2 (46:23):
They're humans that became much like a you could say,
like a prophet. Then Aphrodite is real. They made statues
after them. They were real though, Yeah, real people.
Speaker 1 (46:33):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (46:34):
Hades and Zeus was real people. Yes, But Sidon he
was he was in the ocean.
Speaker 1 (46:40):
He wasn't real real.
Speaker 2 (46:41):
You gotta think, for example, no, I need you no, no,
For example, Moses and the parting of the Red Sea.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Now that's a Bible person, let me get it, let
me cook.
Speaker 2 (46:49):
People say, even though that sounds crazy that he did that,
it was really a low tide sol all of the
Poseidon ship, all of the Aphrodite shit.
Speaker 1 (46:58):
These gods and goddesses, they were humans. They was not humans.
Speaker 4 (47:01):
Ever, assertion that Greek gods are non real supported by
archaeological elements evidence excuse me, comparative monology. The Greek gods,
as depicted in mythology are not considered to be literal,
spiritual beings that existed in the physical world. By monitor.
Speaker 1 (47:14):
They was not in the physical world, that was not human.
Speaker 4 (47:17):
However, they are viewed as powerful, symbolic.
Speaker 1 (47:20):
Symbolic they simples. They're not she said they were humans.
Speaker 3 (47:23):
At one point this is given my chicken wing. I
think my chicken wing. Take bit, no, I think this
is that was Hades and Zeus was not real Hercules.
Speaker 4 (47:33):
Wings all the time.
Speaker 3 (47:34):
I believe it and thought the wing was a toe.
Don't don't do that. That's just an anatomy that I
got wrong. You would see here.
Speaker 2 (47:42):
You thought a chicken wing and collucting on this day camera.
Speaker 3 (47:47):
B I just said it. It is kind of a toe.
It's just the finger. Then, bitch, I got the wrong.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
I believe they were real, and I believe these books
and all this Google ship makes us wants us to think.
Speaker 1 (47:57):
It's faith.
Speaker 3 (47:57):
And you can now join Weezy's call at weezysct dot
com just like I think and real. All right now,
y'all know we had to take it over to Egypt
and the Pharaoh, which the pharaoh.
Speaker 1 (48:09):
Was an actual human being. This is.
Speaker 4 (48:13):
Now, I don't think anything's real.
Speaker 3 (48:15):
The pharaoh was real, that was a real. This one
is crazy, y'all of Egypt. This one is crazy. And
this is how I guess he wanted to boost fertility
around Egypt. The pharaoh was expected to ejaculate into the
Nile during a fertility festival to.
Speaker 1 (48:32):
Bless the lamb bitch.
Speaker 3 (48:35):
I want to know who had to watch it or
if he did it in silence or he poured it
from a cup like well.
Speaker 1 (48:39):
I think it was probably a kink because you know
the grinks was freaks. No, you wished me in Egypt
not Greece.
Speaker 4 (48:44):
Well all of them A good question. They also the
jar directly, like.
Speaker 1 (48:50):
Did he have to nut immediately? Or did was it
just his ferm? That was maybe everybody watched it.
Speaker 3 (48:56):
No, he said it he was expected to ejaculate into
the nile, So I feel like he had to nut
into the river. This is crazy, y'all. Okay, So northern
Celtic tribes, how do we get here? For the fertility
of this Bonfires and beltane orgies were common. People believe
sex during these rituals would ensure abundant crops and healthy livestock.
Speaker 1 (49:20):
So basically they threw a whole orgy.
Speaker 3 (49:23):
Where people assumed that during this moment, as we're having
sex and essentially everything around us would be fertile, so
the livestock would grow, plants would grow, and that I
would inseminate you at the same time, because we're in
belief that this is corn.
Speaker 1 (49:41):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (49:42):
I wonder if there's something that they used to do
with taste. Just imagine you're like, hey, how do I
know if my seaman's any good? If it's salty, it's this.
If it's sweet, it's this. How do you know what
healthy semen was back then? It can't just be consistency.
Speaker 1 (49:58):
You probably had to eat it.
Speaker 3 (49:59):
I'll say my thoughts, My thoughts on that is that
nut consistency. While yes, there's healthy and unhealthy, I do
also think it's subjective of what's healthy.
Speaker 1 (50:12):
No, no, no, of.
Speaker 2 (50:13):
What someone back then would assume it to be, because
it would be based on what you enjoy.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
I know people like different nuts like you do. I
like different nuts.
Speaker 3 (50:22):
I think i'll guarantee you since you like bukaki and
shit like it and cream pies, the consistency and weigh
in which you like nut is probably different than I
like nut.
Speaker 1 (50:31):
And this is y'all getting horrible decisions at this point.
Speaker 3 (50:33):
But I think we're late enough into the shel to like,
what is your your choice of not consistency? Okay, so
let's talk about Wait, we might ask you what your
nut consistency is.
Speaker 2 (50:43):
Yeah, it's I like a volume shooter or I like
a drip down shoot. Sometimes I like it to shoot
right up and then it just drips down the dick.
Speaker 1 (50:51):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (50:53):
I like to see it go from super thick white
to get runny a little bit, and then if I
pick it up to eat it, I like to be
able to still see the white.
Speaker 1 (51:01):
Don't clear up too quick. I still need white see.
Not that I'm racist. I ain't gonna hold you.
Speaker 3 (51:08):
I I like just enough nut to where I feel it.
Speaker 2 (51:14):
But no, I don't like a lot of nut. I
like one moment. I like just enough to be like, ooh,
you can't. I don't like volume. I don't want it
to be like a puddle.
Speaker 1 (51:26):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (51:27):
I also don't like it too thick. I like it
to kind of be like, like, what's.
Speaker 1 (51:31):
The point in a little bit of squirt? Might as
well pee? No, that's how I feel. Might as well
nut cool?
Speaker 3 (51:36):
So to me the law, I like it, And I
also like it clear anything white, maybe because I associated
with a yeast infection and I know it's not the same.
I don't like super white shit like even okay, you
know I watch gay porn.
Speaker 1 (51:48):
You want clear nuts? Oh, I'm not gonna lie when
I watch gay porn.
Speaker 2 (51:53):
If there's too much white stuff coming out the asshole
onto the dick, I'm like, oh, it's too mess isy, yucky.
Speaker 1 (52:01):
Don't know why it's so much white sulk, because that's
the louver colored to make a hunt. I don't like it,
so I won't.
Speaker 3 (52:06):
I will turn off a video if if the dick
turns white from this.
Speaker 1 (52:11):
Well, now that we've taken you to Egypt, everything we should,
I don't like it. No, no, no, no, no, hold on,
hold up, let me finish, Let me finish. I have
two more places.
Speaker 3 (52:18):
So Japan Shinto tradition phallic festivals, y'all know, phallic means
penis or penis like shapes like Kanamara Matsuri celebrated fertility
with giant penis shaped floats.
Speaker 1 (52:36):
By the way, y'all, this is still celebrated today.
Speaker 3 (52:38):
I've not been to Japan yet, and I think for
research purposes, maybe the businessness can cover half of my trip.
Speaker 1 (52:44):
Since it's for research, I'd.
Speaker 3 (52:45):
Love to go be able to film these giant penis
shape floats. Last one in West Africa and Yoruba religion
Yoroba Thank you, Aba, fertility dances and offerings to Osha,
Goddess of Love and fertility.
Speaker 1 (53:06):
I'm a hotel though, don't you know.
Speaker 3 (53:10):
By the way, they continue still today in Nigeria and
diaspora communities, but there are still fertility dances and offerings
to this goddess as a way to.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
It's afrobast basically that hope.
Speaker 3 (53:28):
These rituals made fertility communal joyful and spiritual, with women
often seen as life bringers rather than passive vessels. So
they celebrated the female bodies, their ability to carry the
acknowledgment that there was a womb there that brought life
into things, and so it was a way to celebrate
(53:49):
women is not just things to bend over and fuck.
Speaker 1 (53:52):
And get your net off.
Speaker 3 (53:54):
But yeah, so that is the history of fertility in
some of the rituals that have been used over time.
Speaker 2 (54:02):
Well, I will make sure to try my fertility dance
tonight in the club.
Speaker 1 (54:06):
I'm staying far away from all this shit, y'all.
Speaker 2 (54:10):
Head on over to patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions
if you want more sex than just me and Mandy
talking about the kind of com and that we like.
And also NHB tour dot com. Come and check us
out in a bunch of cities. I was gonna name them,
but we had no time.
Speaker 1 (54:25):
A whole lot. It's a lot. It's a lot. Make
sure you get your tickets, make sure you support us.
Speaker 3 (54:29):
Thank you, and also make sure you subscribe to our YouTube,
our social pages, keep up to date with everything we
have going on.
Speaker 1 (54:36):
And once again, thank you so very much for tuning in.
Speaker 3 (54:40):
I'm gonna blend it for this outra for listening to
horrible decisions decision by
Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say
decision decisions. It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty.
You definitely say to welcome, welcome to the new podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Oh wait, you want to say together decisions decisions.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
How are sow?
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Welcome to decisions Decisions and scene.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
I'm your girl, mandyb I'm weezy, and all I want
to know is did you meet Denzel?
Speaker 1 (00:23):
I didn't get to meet Denzel, and I was so sad.
But let me.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Tell you how to hold everything in me to not
literally lean forward and go like this, because that's how
close I was to the stage. I had an inner
moment of being like, Okay, bitch, this is what you
work hard for. Because I was so excited to be
able to go see Othello when it was on Broadway
(00:48):
and literally my seat was bb I will say I
was mad though, because uh, I got so scared last
year with going to the hospital and having a kidney
infection that I had to the bathroom daring Act one
and bitch because I was second row and they entered
through the orchestra, No, bitch, I couldn't go back to
my seat. So Act one thirty five minutes. I watched
it on a thirty two inch TV downstairs by the bathroom,
(01:12):
but I got Act two is the best act anyways, but.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
It was you know what the line came they let
you go. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
No, the actors were entering through the orchestra, so so
like because they were doing that, they couldn't have people.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
If you were orchestra and bitch you got up, you
couldn't where it's the five hundred.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Oh by the way, I want to give a little
tip to anyone if this happens again.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
It's no longer on Broadway. Ended on June eighth, But
if you guys.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Want to see a Broadway show and the ticket seemed
to be a lot, if you have the ability for
someone to just go to the box office and by
the ticket.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
I paid four ninety nine for my seat. I literally
at it was with me.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Right after I bought it, I went on step hub
to see that same row eight eighty six. So I
literally saved almost four hundred dollars by getting my ticket
at the box office.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Ticket master got the feed.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Y'all gotta just say okay, now, oh, I did want
to say, uh huh.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
If y'all listened to.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
The cinema where we talked about sinners.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
I felt the same, a bitch need the subtitles or
was a.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
Little upset that they didn't speak in modern day English.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
How would they do the subtitles in a flame?
Speaker 3 (02:26):
Well, bitch, I don't know what there's there's a they
got listening assistance and shit. I was like, can if
I could have had something to where it was broken
down in like modern day talk? So here was my
thing about the show. Denzel phenomenal. He was way better
on this than he was the Gladiator. Like on Gladiator,
I felt like, Nigga, you and Rome while you sound
(02:48):
like you from Brownsville, Like I felt like he didn't
even try to sound like I felt like we didn't
even try to sound Roman, bitch.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
But he sounded very Shakespeare.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
However, the show took place in modern time, which was confusing.
So set design, they wore US marines like costumes and
stuff like that, but then the props were very dated.
And then in one of the things, he was like,
I'm gonna put you on a plane. So I'm like, bitch,
are they in Venice and Cyprus and Shakespearean times or not?
(03:18):
Like there was a confusion a little bit for me there,
but Jake Jillhome, I ain't.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Gonna hold you.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
It looked it looked heavy as I don't know, maybe
it ain't. I know he say he don't watch his legs,
but he did. Yeah, he came out and say he
didn't watch his legs, and I was like, I watched him.
For him, it looked heavy. I will say that I'm
a hood boger and I'm embarrassed to say, so Othello.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
For those of you who don't know.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
The reason also outside of Denzel and Jake as to
why I wanted to see this play on stage is
not because I'm as Shakespeare buff, but one of my
fever films. And y'all are just gonna laugh at this
at this point at my film selection is OH based
on OH was based on Othello?
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Look it up, y'all.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
It's with Makai Fifer and Julia Styles and so because
and instead of them being like General's bitch.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Makai Fifer is the star basketball.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
But so it was giving like Hamilton, how it's old
in time but new school, like it felt like it
shouldn't have Like I'm like like if these no, I
loved it.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
I didn't say I didn't like it. I just think
that the set design was odd. And I'm like, if
we and modern times make these niggas speak more English,
like not Shakespeare in English, but like English English. So literally,
as I'm watching it, did you go by yourself? I
went by myself? Absolutely? And it was dope because the
lady next to me was probably like seven or eighty.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
She was like, I go to place all the time
by myself. Which movie? Yeah, I loved it.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
So for those of y'all who don't know othello, I
want to give it to y'all in like a urban take, okay.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Because I felt so ghetto daring.
Speaker 3 (05:06):
Act two is when all the drama takes place, and
so I'm watching it like, oh no, she didn't like
I'm literally like scary movies.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
I'm gagged.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
I'm gagged. And so basically you got a general, a
black general, which was Denzel. So Denzel marries this girl, Desdemona,
who's like the daughter of someone really high up right
in the game, let's say that really high up. So
(05:38):
this black general marries marries her without telling her father
or anything. So the father find out and it's like, now,
why you married this nigga without telling me who the
fuck is this. So anyways, we meet them in a
setting where the father finds out and they are in
the middle of something professional, war wise, work wise, whatever.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
But basically we I met with Iago. Iago is looking to.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Become second in line after after Denzel's character Othello like
comes down. So Iago's like his right hand man, Iago
like doing everything loyal, trying to kind of brown nose
his way to take Othello's position.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Well a little did this, Nigga.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
No.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Othello was like, yeah, no, I'm giving a job to Cassius.
So Cassius is next in line.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Iago med as fuck cause he's like, bitch, I should
be next. So Iago, who's who you think is loyal?
Who Othello believes to be his friend is? So is
so angry and upset at Othello for not choosing him
to be next in line.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
That bitch.
Speaker 3 (06:46):
He started putting little things in his ear, like yo,
bitch sleeping with Cassius. And so we're in this like
play where Othello's like, no, not my woman, Cassius. Cassius
didn't do that to me, mind you. Cassius over there
fucking on a little woman of the night. He got
a hold, Jezebel, a little hope or whatever. Basically, Iago
(07:08):
start setting little things, put some shit in Cassius's room.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Othello finds out.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
He's like, there's no way that would end up in
his room without my woman leaving it there. By the way,
Mandy is saving you guys five hundre dollar because I
didn't know we gonna get the whole poll.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
No, it's Shakespeare. No, this ain't no spoiler. It's it's Shakespeare.
So like it's it's everywhere, Like I'm just telling y'all
if you can't understand Shakespeare in English, like me, just
the tea. So basically, then Denzelle's heartbroken, like Cassius, you
betrayed me.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Iaga, Like what you want to do?
Speaker 1 (07:45):
You want me to go kill that nigga?
Speaker 3 (07:47):
So then Iago set up to go kill Cassius because
now he feels like this is a way for him
to get the job that Cassius is about to get.
So bro, he gonna send one of his niggas to
go kill Cassius. He believes Cassie got murked bitch and
did it. But Othello don't know that yet. All O'thello
know is I can't have no Hoe as a.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Wife, Othello is Denzel, so bitch. Next scene, Othello pull
up to the room his bitch sleep. He kissed her
because he's like, bitch, you got to go. So she
wakes up and it is literally telling him, bro, I
ain't fucking Cassius.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
You sitting here acting like I cheated on you.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
I didn't cheat on you. I don't know why you
think I cheated on you. He said, bitch, you lying.
You got to go, so bitch, he literally kills that bitch.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Literally. You see her like so Othello like, yeah, I.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Ain't dating no Ho, you got to go kill her
as literally he kills her.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Bitch.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Come walk in his homeboy like sorry, I know we
put the hit on Cassius, but that nigga ain't die.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
And he's like, well, I just killed my fucking wife.
So a lot of fuck Cassius. Bit y'all did my job.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
How you ain't doing your job? Uh huh. So the
friend of the wife comes in and it's like.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
No, not my best friend. How you kill my best friend?
Fuck nigga, Oh I'm coming for you. Start yelling at
motherfucking Othello and Othello, like your friend was a house.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
She had to go.
Speaker 3 (09:20):
Next thing, you know, he brings up the thing that
got left in the room that Iago placed in Cassia's room,
and the friend was like, nah, I took it.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Mind you.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
The friend is Iago's bitch, So she's like, no, I
took I took that thing.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
She really didn't cheat on you. You just killed my friend.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
And she starts saying all the ways in which she like,
actually did this and is now realizing Iago did it, bitch.
Iago walk over to her, slice her neck.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
Bitch, you talking too much. You got to go.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
So then the arms come in and it's like Iago,
this fuck nigga, we know you set up to kill Cassius.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
You just killed this bitch. They have him in chambers,
bitch now like he's trying to get out. It looks
like the Chicken man. He's trying to get out.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
So everybody's in the scene now and Denzel realizes he
about to go to jail.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
He about to lose his little his little things.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
Cassius is about to take over, and he's like, you
know what, I just killed this bitch. Y'all gonna talk
about me. I'm about to be disbarred now from and
that's not even disbarred. What is it when you get
taken out.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Of the army? So he kills himself, bitch, yes, discharged.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
So he's literally like every which way that I have
been an honorable man will now be ruined. I can't
live on this earth as an unhonorable man, dishonorable man, whatever.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
And he's like, who kill himself? So, bitch, you literally
watch it.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
It's like damn, everybody did and in scene and I'm
just like, damn, I know I remember watching oh, and
it's why I enjoyed it so much.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
And I was like the same way. We have the
same tropes.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
With like the secretary who fucks with the man and
tries to kill the wife because she now wants to
be the wife role. Like y'all know the Beyonce movie
that we've seen in thirty different renditions. I'm like, I
don't know if it's on two b, I don't know
where it's at, But I want to know why we
haven't seen more renditions of modern.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Day Othello's no dude.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
That ship was That ship was a tent like and
it reminded me. It reminded me of like the books
and and things that I used to read that had
sex love betrayal, and also at the same time, how
you literally could see something and completely miss it and
get it wrong because of your own peripheral vision to
(11:47):
a not believe somebody. I think like, it was literally,
it's a tragedy. It's it's it's literally a tragedy. Shut
the fuck up, Edden.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
It's literally a tragedy. But as I was watching it,
I was like, ooh, t this nigga line.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Oh, this bitch really ain't cheating, but she'd being accused
of cheating, and then this nigga so heartbroken, you gonna
kill her. I was like, I need, I need more
of this, and so maybe I just need to read
some more books.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
Come out so you could understand centers. No, no, no
old English was no.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Let's be very clear.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
In my head, I'm like Denzel macay Pfeiffer does does Madino?
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Does the Dino? Whatever? Does the Mona?
Speaker 3 (12:26):
That's Julia Stiles diss the White Man with the Dark
Hair in the movie.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
I'm literally watching it and only know what's happening.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
I'm watching it actually like the tele novella, it's given espono,
it's given a language I don't understand.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
I think you probably just need to watch more old
movies because or like medieval times, because I was struggling
in the middle the middle of Game of Thrones and
then it went away.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
Now I can watch anything like that.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
There's different languages, there's different like at the accent different like,
so once you watch it, it's like understanding Southern people. Once
you down there, you start getting it, baby. But I
like it, like I don't think I like Shakespearean lingo.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Like actually, like for.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
The way that he was talking, and it was like, Bro,
you just said all the words to say nothing bitch.
I was like, we could have cut this down of
like two sentences instead it was like three paragraphs.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
It's so crazy how actors memorize all that shit. What's
crazy about you? Seeing Othello last night? My friend had
a birthday party last night and in Walks there was
more like celebrities there. Jeremy o'harris walks in and the
best play I've ever seen with slave play.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
And he didn't know he was.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
She had a party and a rooftop in Central Park,
and I could tell he didn't know was somebody's birthday party.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
He was just chilling. I was like this right, and
she's like, I mean, is he going to take a picture?
And You're like, how do you know Jeremy and her?
She's like who that? And I was like, you don't
understand who is it? So he's seeing my face and
I'm like, jagged, bitch, did you see him?
Speaker 4 (13:55):
I think I did see him. Yeah, oh my god,
later in the night.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Yeah with the fro. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Bro Let me tell you writers, directors, filmmakers, they're about
to become the new ship.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
I just found out.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I'm going to a party on Friday and Writing Coogler's invited.
I'm trying to figure.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
Out my speech. I'm not gonna bring it up unless
it just so happens.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Will I have too many cocktails to where I say
you can rob trains and play.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
I hit him with that line that what am I.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
Gonna do is everybody gonna bring it up? Am I
just gonna be the one that don't bring it up?
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Am I gonna like play cool and try to be like,
la bitch, My nigga is gonna be there, So it's
not like I'm trying to fuck. How am I gonna
let this person know? I think you made one of
the best movies of all time.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
You can just say that.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
No, I don't want bring it up or do like
your rendition of sinners.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
No, I gotta wash up what you mean?
Speaker 4 (14:38):
Oh my god?
Speaker 2 (14:40):
Okay, So I want to talk about birthdays really quick.
This girl throws a birthday party my homegirl, Gabrielle.
Speaker 4 (14:48):
I'm sorry, I'm not mad at him laughing. It was
just a birthday. Yeah, I love this.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
It's a ketchup.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Yeah, so birthdays. Friend throws a party for thirty first
birthd day on a roof. She calls me this morning,
and I'm sure she would repeat this story, but I
think it's the same old tale as time. And I
want everybody who's got a birthday coming up to hear
this story and let you know you got a chill.
I was like, how is your night? Because I took
(15:16):
her mom home and my mom home. She said, girl,
I am so tired. I will never do a birthday
party again. I don't want to do this. At one point,
I wanted to lock myself in the bathroom. I was
talking to too many people. Yeah, I cannot believe I
put myself through this. I'm like, damn, I'm so sorry
to hear this because you looked beautiful. All your friends
(15:38):
are there supporting you. I hate that you feel like this.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
She's like, next year, I don't even I just want
to do a trip with my friend. Maybe two, maybe three.
Maybe I need to go myself. Like she was like, overload.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
What is the thing? Is it that we don't have
anything else to celebrate when we get older? Why is
it that we keep planning these fucking things with all
these people? Birthdays become so fucking stressful. I felt so
sorry for this morning, Nandy. I literally was like, oh
my god, you want to go to lunch? No, I
want to go sweet, I don't need anything.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
It's like the exhaustion of hosting.
Speaker 4 (16:09):
A lot was going on.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
I mean I've been said this, Yeah, like most of
the times, I don't want to know my birthday Like yeah,
he literally literally I I So. I pulled up on
Eden's birthday and he wasn't DJing.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
You weren't you weren't working that night. I literally just
dj No, he wasn't eve DJing, but he just had everyone.
He had everyone pull up.
Speaker 3 (16:29):
So and this was during fashion week and I was like, oh,
Edit's birthday, let me make sure I'll pull in and
I pull in, and I think maybe as soon as
I got there is just when the flood of his
friends came in, and I remember going to the bar like, Eden,
what do you want to drink? As soon as I
ordered he we did our shot literally immediately, literally and
I was only there for like fifteen maybe twenty minutes.
(16:53):
He looked at me and was like, because everyone came
at the same time, everyone was like happy birthday. And
then everyone started bringing him shots.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
And he said, help me. It was bad, and I
saw his face. It's a terror. Why do we do that?
Speaker 4 (17:07):
I mean, she looked like she was having fun too,
but I understand the sense of being overwhelmed. There's too
much attention is a thing.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
Doubt.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yeah. She even said at one point, like every time
I wanted to dance, I took a picture, somebody was
taking a picture with me. I was like, babe, mind
you Gabrielle's model, Like this is her job to take photos.
She said, so many times I just want to dance,
but you know you're really hosting. You're making sure everybody
else is having a good time. I feel so big
(17:39):
because when she was on a hunker plane and I
was like, girl.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Almost another one everybody has a better time at your
party than you.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
I mean, it's not even on the dance floor the
whole time.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
It's not even just birthday parties.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Though I hear this a lot as the sentiment around
weddings like that the wedding is essentially for everyone else
to celebrate, like the reception the wedding, and it's not
really about the couple.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
It's about let's be very.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
Clear, everyone there is gonna judge the venue, the food,
the DJ, is the bar open, and is it top
shelf or not? Like everyone makes it about them and
so it in turn becomes a party for everyone else,
and it normally isn't fun like I think that. And
I just saw a statistic about even how many couples
(18:25):
end up actually having sex the night of their wedding,
and it's a very low percentage because they're both.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
No, it wasn't not low, but it was low enough.
I think we talked about it horrible it was. It
was in the fifty or something, so it wasn't that low,
but it really wasn't as much as we think.
Speaker 4 (18:39):
Whenever I do consultations for DJing weddings, and I actually
got one coming up in May, right, I tell them.
I'm like, congratulations, I'm glad it's a special day, but
I know it's going to be stressful because at the
end of the day, it's really for everyone else. It's
all the pictures they take the bride in the groom, barelead,
especially the bride because it's they're specially they trying to
have the dress on everything like that, and outfit's a
lot exactly, and then the speeches and then the drinks.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
It's so crazy guys are bringing up weddings.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Because after she vented for like fifteen minutes with me,
the next thing out of her mouth, this girl's not engaged.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
She said, eloping is going to be great. That's what
she said.
Speaker 2 (19:12):
Because the next thing you think is, oh, I'm not
gonna be able to do this. Like I'm gonna tell you.
It really showed me how much we throw parties for
everyone else and we want to get our people together.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
It's too much.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
Like this year on my birthday, mine kind of went
the other way. So I got a big ass fucking
house for all my friends to come.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
Christ.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
This is what I think people should do on their birthdays, right,
I'm like, just get the house and bite people on
the trip, they buy the ticket.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
I did that for my thirty thing. Still Nope, I'll
never do it again.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
So it was five bedrooms, Me and my man Kill
and her husband Andre, It was Vannie and I think
Mea and her husband. Just a bunch of friends, right, girls,
didn't you know about end a trip? It was too
Andre got book for an event, Vinnie had.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
To go viewed his mom. Everybody was like and it
was real life shit plans we had for months, you know.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
I know I felt bad. I did all this booking
my thirtieth birthday. I have friends travel from the Carolinas, Vegas, London, Atlanta,
two from Vegas, one from and went from Miami.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
There was I think seven of us.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
We fly into Mexico during a hurricane. House gets canceled,
boat gets canceled.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
And now they know how I am. Guess what.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
They all land right before me. And so because they
all know how I get in my anxiety, they all
come together and are trying to find us another house
because Mexico is trying to send everyone to a fucking
stadium like on some bunker down type shit I mean,
And so literally we ended up going shopping. We end
up still doing the boat, but the waters were still choppy.
(20:47):
But literally dinner, dinner, reservation, everything, what.
Speaker 4 (20:51):
You got on a boat?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
No?
Speaker 1 (20:53):
No, no, no. Two days later, wait no, the hurricane passed.
It came and passed.
Speaker 4 (20:58):
I still wouldn't got down on a boat for another week.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
Nigga. I was in Mexico. How would that be out
We're from Florida. Those Yeah, a hurricane. You go out
that night, Let's be very clear. I'll say, let's be
very clear. A party.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
We we got through the night hurricane passed. I look outside,
I said, also, little a couple of branches on it.
Speaker 1 (21:18):
We could have win.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
I literally was real. Florida, Like, bro, they's so extra.
They always do this when hurricanes come.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
It ain't even that serious.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Oh, speaking of birthdays, I was literally thinking, okay, so
this whole thing's going on right. My boyfriend for his
birthday that week, we're going on a cruise. I was like, oh,
he's never done one. I've done a munch with my
family back in the day.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
This will be cute. From La Easy. Something came up
with my job. They're very big gigs.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
One of the days we've bet on the boat, and
I was like, you know, what if we were married.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
He would tell me.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Do this gig like that's how much money it is.
He would be like, bitch, are you out of your mind?
So I called him, I told him what was going on.
He was like, listen, I feel like you want to
do so much for me because I do so much
for you. I need you to understand this type of
man I am. I'm gonna tell you again. We can eat,
we can sit in the hotel room. I can be
(22:22):
right there while you do this event, even if it
was on my birthday. You have got to stop overthinking
these big events in life. And like I realized, my
love language is gift giving so much that sometimes it's
not translating because the way that I'm like to be
shown up for what he's doing is the same thing
I'm doing. Is that how many times I tell you
(22:45):
we can do nothing, we can go to eat, we
could go see a movie, Please stop thinking so deeply.
And I was really feeling guilty because number One, when
we plan something for someone or when we're trying to
do a.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
Gesture, it really is about them.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
However I do at the same time, and this could
be something that's totally wrong and it's semi related to
your ex partner with throwing you the birthday party. I
want you to know I'm doing this for you and
I want you to really feel my love from this,
almost more than my brain can even think.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Are you enjoying this? I want you to feel it.
I guess it could.
Speaker 2 (23:25):
It's selfish, but it's like I don't know how else
to show up sometimes because I am such a pleaser.
And it was just this whole conversation of like, bitch,
you wear cancel a vote and we just doing dinner.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
Now I didn't. I found out a way to move
the event, but I say this.
Speaker 4 (23:39):
To say move the event.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Yeah, I was like, figure out another time to do it,
and I charge them less money. But basically what I
was gonna say was like, anyone that's planning for a friend,
anyone that's planning an event, you really do have to
sit and ask maybe you're not super selfish in that
story you told us you said your ex was.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Like, what about what I wanted to do? Those words
feel selfish?
Speaker 2 (24:01):
Maybe I'm not saying those words, but am I actually
being selfish? And we really got to sit with ourselves,
like are all the grand gestures you're making, and all
the plans you're trying to make actually not something that
person wants. And I haven't really sat with myself in
a while and thought that because I'm just trying to
be a mirror of what he's doing for me. I mean,
I do think that there's a difference from gifting your
(24:24):
partners something that hasn't been discussed and giving your partner
something they literally said they didn't want verbatim.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
True, Like, there's power in listening to a partner and
even if you can't afford or get them exactly what
they ask for, to give them something they literally said
they don't want because you've never done it, or it
would make you feel good, or it's a way that
you feel like you could show your love is selfish.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
And yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
Think that showing your trying to make grand gestures to
show your love is selfish.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
I think not listening is. Yeah, But that's.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Where where I thought about your exing the party, because
I'm like, oh, this is an interesting tie because mine
isn't rooted in the narcissism, but it is rooted in
me people pleasing. So it's like these two different things,
and you I could have really have shown up and
been doing something that someone's like, this is too much.
So I just realized, you know, throughout this whole thing
with a birthday conversation all that like.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
I've been doing too much. I've you doing too much.
A lot of times. I even do too much of
my parents.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
There's times where I take my mom's shop and are
we doing all these extra things? You'd be like, what
is it my fucking birthday?
Speaker 1 (25:30):
And I don't know what that is.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
I wonder if it's an only child, Oh my god,
please like me shit. But yeah, I'm starting to see
it just show up a lot.
Speaker 4 (25:38):
No, I mean, I feel like, I mean, don't I
guess the way I'm analyzing it, what you're saying, does
it sound like like me. It's more like I'm trying
to make a grand gesture.
Speaker 1 (25:47):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
I don't see it as And also, it's this thing
of life. Why are we doing all this shit for
someone that's just happy. Even if it's a homegirl and
you're planning something great for her, she might have been like, bitch,
we could have went anywhere. It's that type of shit.
It's just kind of like it's not always needed. So
I want to say that to say keep shit?
Speaker 4 (26:05):
Can I can I go on the opposite room. Have
you guys done the fijidas thing? You guys talked about
this man to make shit say the whole thing filling everybody.
So so there was a whole thing on social media
at one point talking about how you don't take too
much attention from the birthday person on their birthday. An example, right,
you go to a Mexican restaurant. I don't care whichever
(26:27):
one you guys go to. The point is the com
you see the you see the menu, there's tacos ares
burritos that ethos A discussed the etctera. You are the
birthday girl. Damn, I don't want to put you in
this for fuck it, the birthday girl. We easy orders
fajitas on that event. Now what happens when you get
the fieta?
Speaker 1 (26:47):
Everybody looks at you because it's smoking, and say.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
By looks at you because it's smoking. Now the internet
was split. Do you order the fijitas if it's not
your birthday?
Speaker 1 (26:56):
Yo? What just because the attention? Ye niggas need to
go to therapy. I ain't gonna hold you. Get the
fuck out of here.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
First off, if y'all know me, y'all know that Mexican
is the bottom three worst cuisines in the world.
Speaker 1 (27:11):
You are hate Mexican food.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
So y'all will never see me at a Mexican restaurant
for a celebration. But for me, I think, let me
take it away from the Mexican restaurant, so that I
what's an equivalent. The equivalent would be you're good dress,
so you would know the equivalent would be you are
the birthday girl. There is a theme for how y'all
(27:33):
should all dress, and someone decides that even though they
received the theme, they're going to show up in whatever
they want to wear, which in turn it's what they wanted.
They're just not listen, you know, and so they get
all the attention. Now for everyone at the table, it
don't matter how good the birthday girl is dressed, which
(27:54):
we said, we're all white, and you got on fucking
pattern or black or red maybe red, you know what
I mean, like to stand out shah, And that I
think is that's what I would say, is that's someone
that maybe shouldn't be there. To me, you ordering fajitas
just because it's sizzle pop and everyone I.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Mean, I see it's like in a what's the word
not an analogy? Yeah, it is like it's just I
get it though, because to me it's it actually is
a good outfit if it's your birthday. And let's just say, yo,
bitch got out fit and she got.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Her hair bust down and the makeup done.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
You just kind of like, oh my god, I thought
it was all about me. Bitches be getting like that,
And I saw something online to let me know.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
I love boy.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Bitches be like what they don't want their homegirl to
show them out fun their day. There is a wedding
theme saying the theme is show up the bride. My
homegirl did this for her wedding in Mexico City, Gila.
I walked in and I was like, why does everybody
look this good? She's like, oh my god. I teld
everybody like, I mean, purple, pink, green, the designs ship symmetrical,
(28:54):
sticking out.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
You know what that is? That is a bitch that
ain't insecure like to me.
Speaker 3 (28:58):
To me, also, someone out be hell subjective. I've had
friends I don't like how they dress at all, so
they show out. Is not my show out? And if
you bet that I pulled up and you like my
fit and I'm just better than you.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Bitch. You should have had a solace. I don't know
what it's. Here's one. I don't what about the homegirl
that you call your friend? What you wearing to night?
I wear jeans.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I can remember jeans. I'm cute, not as social up
in a tight dress. But you know I was gonna
put these damn jeans and take top phone. I changed
my mind because I didn't like how the jeans fit me.
Speaker 4 (29:32):
So you feel deceived.
Speaker 1 (29:34):
No, I just want to like, Oh, you should have
seen it. It's so funny. Shut it.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
No, I don't like when I step out with one
other person. If it's a few of us, it's fine.
If you're really dressing in heels and I'm wearing sneakers.
But you could have told me this. No, this was
actually funny.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
This just happened me and my homegirls Shanna shout out
to Shauna. We went to Barmargo Barmargo on my little spot.
So we go out, and we had already gone out
like three or four times before then. And sometimes I'd
be me my stun attire, I'll be dressed down. But
every time we went out. She likes to get caught up.
She's a mom, and she's like, bitch, if I'm coming
(30:09):
up in the city, I'm gonna be cute. So what's
crazy is we go to Barbargo and she's like, okay, girl,
I will pull up.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
I decide because I know this bitchman to be dressed up.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
I put on my little fucking top four heels, I
put this little flour dressed on a dress to wear.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
I showed my my boyfriend and he was like, I
didn't even know you owned anything like this. What the fuck?
Speaker 3 (30:29):
So I shows each I show up and I'm dressed
up and she said, now, bitch, why you all dressed up?
Speaker 1 (30:35):
I said, bitch, because you already dressed up. And I
felt bad that I don't be mad at yo.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
She came dressed down and she was like, bitch, I
dressed down because I knew I got to meet which'all asked.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
So's a deal unless we playing sneak.
Speaker 3 (30:48):
I guess that's different at thirty at thirty five, depending
on where we're going, we need flat no dress, dress
for dress for the occasion, Like, bitch, you might be
going to bad. I got a boyfriend, and if I
don't want to dress up. I'm gonna dress with what
makes me comfortable. Me and my friends actually now do
not ever have conversations about, well, what you're wearing, because
(31:11):
everyone has their own styles. Nine times out of ten,
I ain't gonna like half the ship my fraywhere.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
To me if we're going casual, because I do think
like if we're gonna show up casual together, like if
me and my girl, if it's a Friday night we're
going to club. If we really gonna be casual, let's
be on a ship together, beach, Let's do the crop
top and the cargo jeans together.
Speaker 4 (31:29):
Switch it up.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
Oh, you know, my best friend twist her ankle, and
I knew that hole was gonna be wearing flats for
a while.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Well, bitch, I'm wearing heels. Doc my friend I wear bitch,
lost a broke the fuck Anyway, let's get to our
no host Bart.
Speaker 3 (31:46):
If you haven't yet, guys, make sure you purchase no
host Bart to do a manifesto of sexual exploration and
power and join us on tour NHB tour dot com.
We are bringing the pages, took the stages in a
city near you. We are making it so different than
any live show you've seen before, but you were still
getting all of the horrible Okay.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Are we taking a page? Are you picking it? No?
Speaker 3 (32:10):
I am reading an excerpt. Okay, this comes from my chapter.
Why don't they just call it a vacuum? So this
is the chapter around my abortion. It's in the pain
section of the book. My mom says she wishes she'd
had this conversation with me earlier, and that it wasn't
in the form of a trauma bond. No one had
(32:32):
talked to her either, so this was part of our
familial cycle. She said she would have talked to me
earlier about the consequences and results of the actual birds
and bees.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
But here's the issue. The problem is a cyclical one.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Before she got pregnant at fifteen, no one had ever
talked to her about sex either. Those were from different generations.
My mom and I both remember being told very little
at school. She didn't have planned parenthood or any resources
at the time. In Newport, Ritchie, Florida, where she grew up.
I remember a sex ad class where we, and when
I say we, I mean the young women were told
(33:07):
by our teacher to abstain from having sex the boys
were going to be boys and the girls were going
to say angelic virgins. Somehow, math is my strong suit,
and I remember thinking about how it would work in
real time that math was not mathing. We were told
not to have sex because we would either A get pregnant,
B get HIV or some other sexually transmitted disease that
(33:31):
would make you filthy or see all the above. Well,
I was battling the multiple choice selection, and here I
was being a pregnant. I wanted to ask both of
you if there is any conversation, and I know this
may be a difficult question for you because she's no
(33:51):
longer here, but are there any conversations that you wish
you had had specifically with your mom regarding sex or
sex sooner that maybe came up later.
Speaker 4 (34:03):
I think no, no, because there typically For me, it
all came from my father as a man that I
swear the birds in the bees conversation was five seconds
that month with your dad. Yeah, and your mom never
had it, which everything I've learned in terms of sex
is from the entering.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
How are you? Oh? Wow? They had you. I wonder
if this had to do with.
Speaker 4 (34:24):
Age thirty, because it's my father's sixty.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
Okay, oh wow, so even later on we're a little
bit more mature.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
They definitely knew themselves more sexually. Yeah wow. And it
was still like five seconds and that which is.
Speaker 4 (34:35):
But but I don't condom condom? Yeah basically that's really what?
Speaker 1 (34:40):
Right?
Speaker 4 (34:40):
Yeah, like basically that just wear a condom or don't
get people pregnant.
Speaker 1 (34:44):
I'll be honest with you.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
My mom even knowing I was having sex because I
had to come and throw a positive pregnancy test on
the bed. I had wished that, and and that happened
when I was just about to turn sixteen. And for me,
that was definitely the age where instead of me being
(35:07):
told to go to the other room or anything like that,
it should have been where when her friends was over,
my aunties were over and conversations were being had because
a lot of my mom's friends and my aunts was dating.
Speaker 1 (35:21):
They weren't.
Speaker 3 (35:22):
Like again, I didn't grow up seeing healthy marriages or
people in long standing relationships.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Like my aunt wasn't with my uncle, my mom wasn't
with my dad.
Speaker 3 (35:30):
Her friends were all single bitches out you know, they
go on a playpool to find some niggas, and so
I wish just the conversation about how sex doesn't really
make someone like you happen.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
And I do wish that I knew.
Speaker 3 (35:45):
The trauma that my mom experienced with sex, with dating,
and specifically her decision to have an abortion. I wish
that conversation came without the need to trauma bond with
each other. I would have liked to known my mom
a little bit more or as a woman and not.
Speaker 1 (36:02):
Just a mom personally. What about you?
Speaker 2 (36:07):
I mean, I talked to my mom talked about sex
so early, and I'm sure we'll dig into this convo
when we interview her tomorrow, but something that's just coming
to my mind. It's interesting because like a lot of
my homegirls talk about their mom with dating experiences and
I can't relate because she was married. But the interesting
thing is, I think it's very reflective. I saw my
(36:27):
mom in her dating. Technically, every single day all I
saw was my mom and is wife, you know what
I mean. So even though I knew her as an
individual person, I think it's probably what shaped me to
be the type of person I am because she was
such a wife. Being a housewife, that's your job. Every
single day, you're showing up like that, you're being that
type of person.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
Like. It was a weird thing too, because when I.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Got older and started dating men, my homegirls and I
have of course had relationship talks. When I started dating
romantic relationships, you talk a lot more about like my
mom was saying, you know, et cetera. I didn't realize
how jaded I was to single mom. It's pain like
just because the dating experience as a mom, a kid
(37:14):
sees it completely. They're watching it, they're viewing it like
that never happened to me. I don't really know what
my mom was like in according stage when I never
really asked much about like when they met. I also
don't really know what kind of happens when she's heartbroken
or sad.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
They were in a marriage the whole time. I never
saw those phases.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
So everything I learned about that shit is just through
conversations through friends. So that's even and your parents were married, right, yeah,
so like, yeah, that's something.
Speaker 3 (37:42):
Yeah, my experience seeing that it was interesting because through
writing this book, I you know, I got to really
learn my mom more and her relationship with men, and
I remember getting so fucking mad at her and I
snapped at her as an adult now. I remember asking
her like, who, if any of the partners that I
(38:05):
know of over the past thirty years did she feel
like was her favorite or the best or the one
that she wishes lasted? And the name of the person
that she said to me calls so much trauma as
a child, like basically in their breakup, he threatened to
(38:27):
share something that led my mom to try to commit suicide,
and it like I don't want to cry with it.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
I was so mad at her.
Speaker 3 (38:36):
I said, that's the nigga, And I said, you're pathetic,
and I said, I want you to take it to therapy.
Speaker 1 (38:42):
This man that.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
Maybe you're remembering how he maybe made you feel. But
the person that at the end tried to literally ruin
our family and did somewhat like brought a lot of
things out to where you literally almost like you know,
and I had to witness that, and I was so
upset and I was like, oh, I'm sorry, this is
something recent, and I was just like, in terms of
(39:05):
the conversations with my mom about like what healthy relationships
could look like, it frustrates me that at thirty five,
I feel like I'm teaching her how to date and
value herself more and seek out a partner that's worthy
of her. And I just feel like it's in reverse
(39:27):
now because I've had this show for the last eight
years and I've been able to learn myself and I've
gone to therapy. My mom is just what is now
in therapy for the first time in her life at
fifty five.
Speaker 2 (39:38):
I think, and I mean even now we see your
mom isn't even really wrong for probably thinking it, because
we now know sometimes those highs and loads of relationships,
you really keep in mind the good yeah, you want to,
you want to, so it's almost more prevalent than the
good guys. She probably passed over that maybe you thought
about because no, no.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
No, no, let's be very clear. They all suck. Oh well,
I like that's why I was like, which which one
was the best?
Speaker 3 (40:06):
And what's crazy is the one that I liked the
most as an adult he was an alcoholic. He was
an alcoholic and a gambler. So although he was fun
and he was caring and we really like enjoyed his
presence because he was a lot of fun with my mom, financially,
he was in debt because he would either drink or
(40:27):
gamble all his money away, and so from an aspect
of he was always a great person to be around.
As an adult standpoint, he wasn't great like And it
sucks that me. Looking through the history of my mom,
I don't see any any quality in her decisions of dating,
but in talking to her as an adult and recognizing
(40:49):
the traumas of her with her stepdad, I just see
how much has passed down and what we see. A
lot of us only know what we don't want, which
is why I always say I grew up knowing I
didn't want to nigga like my daddy, but I didn't
grow up with an example of a man that I
Actually that's an example of a man.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
I do the opposite to men.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Actually, yeah, my ex said all the time, my dad,
it's like he's just pinnacle, fuck you, fuck you like
my dad.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
This, my dad this.
Speaker 2 (41:16):
And it was crazy because maybe towards the end of
my relationship not old baby, but another ex said, this
man that your dad is is so not realistic to
today's time, and it's not realistic to even the man
you're looking for. That when you compare, it's frustrating. My
dad doesn't really drink. My dad doesn't go out that like,
(41:38):
I would love someone social. I've literally said on this podcast,
I won't date someone but don't drink. And so just
thinking about it, I'm like, oh, I really am comparing
to the man that I'm not even looking for. My
dad is super chill, doesn't really care. I like someone
a little more hyper and more extroverted. Like it's crazy
because I didn't know how much I was setting a standard.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
So it's like when they really are, it's all daddy issues.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
At the same time, maybe my daddy issues may look different,
but the fact that I compared every man, it's fucked up. Oh, well,
my dad does this, he takes care of the house.
He would never let my mom do this. Like, meanwhile,
teamwork is such a normal part of twenty twenty five.
Let's be honest about the economy here. I don't even
want to be a housewife. But yet in the same breath,
I'm telling you I shouldn't be doing this because my
(42:22):
dad would never let me do it. Like, it's almost
crazy that the first impression of dating and men all
comes from this one man.
Speaker 1 (42:30):
It sucks, oh for you. Yeah, I've viewed a lot
of fun.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
No, but even in the opposite way, the impression of
men in a negative way or positive.
Speaker 1 (42:37):
That's it.
Speaker 3 (42:45):
I do want to skip reaction air for this episode
and do and get just a little bit more into
the decision's decisions because I want to have more fun
talking about it. I think it's been really fun to
teach you guys the historical kind of ways in which
certain things around sex started. And this week, y'all don't
(43:09):
make fun of me for the last one, because y'all
know I don't believe it, but we getting into it.
We were talking about fertility rituals, the so sex soil
is sacred?
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Did you so before fertility clinics?
Speaker 3 (43:22):
And again, because I've spoke about talking to my friends
about navigating their biological clock and all these things, I
wanted to get into what people were doing before they
could go and literally get tested and to see if
they could have babies or not. So before fertility clinics,
people turn to sex magic, moon phases in sacred dances.
(43:43):
That's you're real to help the babies come the moon
phases real, bitch, you believe it.
Speaker 1 (43:50):
I'm gonna tell you how I know. Read the love chapter.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
Okay, yeesh, it's scary Also, what do you mean, so
what do you know about moon phases being tied to
fertill like just.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
But all are different stages of ovulation heightened fertility like
it's crazy because we don't talk about it much anymore
because we have so many other options. But the moon
phases were like the number one resource back in the
olden times on when it was prime and optimal to
get pregnant. And our period also is connected to the
moon as.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
Well, even though we all have different cycles. Yes, interesting,
goddamn very interesting there is.
Speaker 1 (44:30):
Don't believe it's not the oh Freddian cycle.
Speaker 2 (44:33):
I believe not to be a hotel because I learned
this watching nineteen Keys clip. It was a nigga talking
meant to be very hotel.
Speaker 1 (44:41):
Oh no, no, no, I thought this motherfucker is bullshit.
Speaker 2 (44:46):
He wasn't saying it was somebody out on them like
this nigga sounds stupid talking about pussy and furies, and
I was like, oh, I guess not. Well, let's start
as long as you got a coofie on off of
the talk shit.
Speaker 1 (44:54):
But some of it be good, some of it don't.
Let's start with the with some historical hot spots.
Speaker 3 (45:00):
Now, y'all know, we'd be liking to take y'all around
the world, no passport needed. So in ancient Mesopotamia, it's
always over there. Where is Mesopotamia? That's a real place. No,
it was, It don't exist no more. I think it
is the Roman or greeklan. Sorry, we're gonna let y'all
know where y'all at. It's a bottom of Mediterranean seat
(45:22):
in the Persian Gulf.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
Iraq, Iraq, Yeah, bitch, it exists in a bombs cataline empire.
Speaker 1 (45:33):
That was all it.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Today Mesopotamia is actually known as present day Iraq, So bitch,
we in Iraq.
Speaker 1 (45:41):
Uh this only time y'all gonna be able to go there,
all right?
Speaker 3 (45:44):
So the goddess Inana's high priestess would perform sacred sex
rituals with kings to ensure a fertile kingdom. This was
called called heroes gamos. So basically I think it's heroes
or none. No, I'm saying the game, look.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
At me making the Spanish it probably.
Speaker 3 (46:09):
And yeah, so I guess now here's the thing. Were
goddesses real things? The goddess, yes, would perform sacred rituals.
Goddesses was real? I thought gods and goddesses was fake.
Speaker 2 (46:23):
They're humans that became much like a you could say,
like a prophet. Then Aphrodite is real. They made statues
after them. They were real though, Yeah, real people.
Speaker 1 (46:33):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (46:34):
Hades and Zeus was real people. Yes, But Sidon he
was he was in the ocean.
Speaker 1 (46:40):
He wasn't real real.
Speaker 2 (46:41):
You gotta think, for example, no, I need you no, no,
For example, Moses and the parting of the Red Sea.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Now that's a Bible person, let me get it, let
me cook.
Speaker 2 (46:49):
People say, even though that sounds crazy that he did that,
it was really a low tide sol all of the
Poseidon ship, all of the Aphrodite shit.
Speaker 1 (46:58):
These gods and goddesses, they were humans. They was not humans.
Speaker 4 (47:01):
Ever, assertion that Greek gods are non real supported by
archaeological elements evidence excuse me, comparative monology. The Greek gods,
as depicted in mythology are not considered to be literal,
spiritual beings that existed in the physical world. By monitor.
Speaker 1 (47:14):
They was not in the physical world, that was not human.
Speaker 4 (47:17):
However, they are viewed as powerful, symbolic.
Speaker 1 (47:20):
Symbolic they simples. They're not she said they were humans.
Speaker 3 (47:23):
At one point this is given my chicken wing. I
think my chicken wing. Take bit, no, I think this
is that was Hades and Zeus was not real Hercules.
Speaker 4 (47:33):
Wings all the time.
Speaker 3 (47:34):
I believe it and thought the wing was a toe.
Don't don't do that. That's just an anatomy that I
got wrong. You would see here.
Speaker 2 (47:42):
You thought a chicken wing and collucting on this day camera.
Speaker 3 (47:47):
B I just said it. It is kind of a toe.
It's just the finger. Then, bitch, I got the wrong.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
I believe they were real, and I believe these books
and all this Google ship makes us wants us to think.
Speaker 1 (47:57):
It's faith.
Speaker 3 (47:57):
And you can now join Weezy's call at weezysct dot
com just like I think and real. All right now,
y'all know we had to take it over to Egypt
and the Pharaoh, which the pharaoh.
Speaker 1 (48:09):
Was an actual human being. This is.
Speaker 4 (48:13):
Now, I don't think anything's real.
Speaker 3 (48:15):
The pharaoh was real, that was a real. This one
is crazy, y'all of Egypt. This one is crazy. And
this is how I guess he wanted to boost fertility
around Egypt. The pharaoh was expected to ejaculate into the
Nile during a fertility festival to.
Speaker 1 (48:32):
Bless the lamb bitch.
Speaker 3 (48:35):
I want to know who had to watch it or
if he did it in silence or he poured it
from a cup like well.
Speaker 1 (48:39):
I think it was probably a kink because you know
the grinks was freaks. No, you wished me in Egypt
not Greece.
Speaker 4 (48:44):
Well all of them A good question. They also the
jar directly, like.
Speaker 1 (48:50):
Did he have to nut immediately? Or did was it
just his ferm? That was maybe everybody watched it.
Speaker 3 (48:56):
No, he said it he was expected to ejaculate into
the nile, So I feel like he had to nut
into the river. This is crazy, y'all. Okay, So northern
Celtic tribes, how do we get here? For the fertility
of this Bonfires and beltane orgies were common. People believe
sex during these rituals would ensure abundant crops and healthy livestock.
Speaker 1 (49:20):
So basically they threw a whole orgy.
Speaker 3 (49:23):
Where people assumed that during this moment, as we're having
sex and essentially everything around us would be fertile, so
the livestock would grow, plants would grow, and that I
would inseminate you at the same time, because we're in
belief that this is corn.
Speaker 1 (49:41):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (49:42):
I wonder if there's something that they used to do
with taste. Just imagine you're like, hey, how do I
know if my seaman's any good? If it's salty, it's this.
If it's sweet, it's this. How do you know what
healthy semen was back then? It can't just be consistency.
Speaker 1 (49:58):
You probably had to eat it.
Speaker 3 (49:59):
I'll say my thoughts, My thoughts on that is that
nut consistency. While yes, there's healthy and unhealthy, I do
also think it's subjective of what's healthy.
Speaker 1 (50:12):
No, no, no, of.
Speaker 2 (50:13):
What someone back then would assume it to be, because
it would be based on what you enjoy.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
I know people like different nuts like you do. I
like different nuts.
Speaker 3 (50:22):
I think i'll guarantee you since you like bukaki and
shit like it and cream pies, the consistency and weigh
in which you like nut is probably different than I
like nut.
Speaker 1 (50:31):
And this is y'all getting horrible decisions at this point.
Speaker 3 (50:33):
But I think we're late enough into the shel to like,
what is your your choice of not consistency? Okay, so
let's talk about Wait, we might ask you what your
nut consistency is.
Speaker 2 (50:43):
Yeah, it's I like a volume shooter or I like
a drip down shoot. Sometimes I like it to shoot
right up and then it just drips down the dick.
Speaker 1 (50:51):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (50:53):
I like to see it go from super thick white
to get runny a little bit, and then if I
pick it up to eat it, I like to be
able to still see the white.
Speaker 1 (51:01):
Don't clear up too quick. I still need white see.
Not that I'm racist. I ain't gonna hold you.
Speaker 3 (51:08):
I I like just enough nut to where I feel it.
Speaker 2 (51:14):
But no, I don't like a lot of nut. I
like one moment. I like just enough to be like, ooh,
you can't. I don't like volume. I don't want it
to be like a puddle.
Speaker 1 (51:26):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (51:27):
I also don't like it too thick. I like it
to kind of be like, like, what's.
Speaker 1 (51:31):
The point in a little bit of squirt? Might as
well pee? No, that's how I feel. Might as well
nut cool?
Speaker 3 (51:36):
So to me the law, I like it, And I
also like it clear anything white, maybe because I associated
with a yeast infection and I know it's not the same.
I don't like super white shit like even okay, you
know I watch gay porn.
Speaker 1 (51:48):
You want clear nuts? Oh, I'm not gonna lie when
I watch gay porn.
Speaker 2 (51:53):
If there's too much white stuff coming out the asshole
onto the dick, I'm like, oh, it's too mess isy, yucky.
Speaker 1 (52:01):
Don't know why it's so much white sulk, because that's
the louver colored to make a hunt. I don't like it,
so I won't.
Speaker 3 (52:06):
I will turn off a video if if the dick
turns white from this.
Speaker 1 (52:11):
Well, now that we've taken you to Egypt, everything we should,
I don't like it. No, no, no, no, no, hold on,
hold up, let me finish, Let me finish. I have
two more places.
Speaker 3 (52:18):
So Japan Shinto tradition phallic festivals, y'all know, phallic means
penis or penis like shapes like Kanamara Matsuri celebrated fertility
with giant penis shaped floats.
Speaker 1 (52:36):
By the way, y'all, this is still celebrated today.
Speaker 3 (52:38):
I've not been to Japan yet, and I think for
research purposes, maybe the businessness can cover half of my trip.
Speaker 1 (52:44):
Since it's for research, I'd.
Speaker 3 (52:45):
Love to go be able to film these giant penis
shape floats. Last one in West Africa and Yoruba religion
Yoroba Thank you, Aba, fertility dances and offerings to Osha,
Goddess of Love and fertility.
Speaker 1 (53:06):
I'm a hotel though, don't you know.
Speaker 3 (53:10):
By the way, they continue still today in Nigeria and
diaspora communities, but there are still fertility dances and offerings
to this goddess as a way to.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
It's afrobast basically that hope.
Speaker 3 (53:28):
These rituals made fertility communal joyful and spiritual, with women
often seen as life bringers rather than passive vessels. So
they celebrated the female bodies, their ability to carry the
acknowledgment that there was a womb there that brought life
into things, and so it was a way to celebrate
(53:49):
women is not just things to bend over and fuck.
Speaker 1 (53:52):
And get your net off.
Speaker 3 (53:54):
But yeah, so that is the history of fertility in
some of the rituals that have been used over time.
Speaker 2 (54:02):
Well, I will make sure to try my fertility dance
tonight in the club.
Speaker 1 (54:06):
I'm staying far away from all this shit, y'all.
Speaker 2 (54:10):
Head on over to patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions
if you want more sex than just me and Mandy
talking about the kind of com and that we like.
And also NHB tour dot com. Come and check us
out in a bunch of cities. I was gonna name them,
but we had no time.
Speaker 1 (54:25):
A whole lot. It's a lot. It's a lot. Make
sure you get your tickets, make sure you support us.
Speaker 3 (54:29):
Thank you, and also make sure you subscribe to our YouTube,
our social pages, keep up to date with everything we
have going on.
Speaker 1 (54:36):
And once again, thank you so very much for tuning in.
Speaker 3 (54:40):
I'm gonna blend it for this outra for listening to
horrible decisions decision by
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