November 12, 2025 • 19 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Let's go ahead and play our first voicemail and see
what they have to say.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Good morning, Mandy is the fifty a Free Jersey, big
fan of you and Bazy from Horrible to Station. So
I wanted to call because my question was, as someone
who's fairly knew to dating in relationships, how should I
start doing that in my daily life? Most of my
(00:35):
school career was mostly being in education, so I've never
really had a chune to see. I'm actually twenty seven,
and I haven't had any type of special experience, so
that's always something I'm stressing about when it comes to
starting to actually really date. So, as somebody who started
(01:00):
real relationships in their thirteen how should I start with
being twenty seven, not having really any relationship experience at all,
no dating experience in those sexual intimate experience as a
twenty seven year old, how should I do with that?
For my stuff? Thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Not the shade in the voicemail talk about since you,
you know, didn't have your real relationship until thirty, how
do I date this?
Speaker 3 (01:32):
I actually really like this question because I think that
there is.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
A misconception but a lack of knowledge around how to
properly quote unquote date. Right, So, just to recap, you
are finally interested in dating at the age of twenty seven,
you focus mostly on your school career in your early twenties,
and you have not had any sex.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
I would be curious if it's just not pressing.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
If you are a sexual and that's not something that
is important to you, I would be like, these are
questions I would ask if this was live. But you
having no dating experience and no sexual or intimate experience
I think doesn't necessarily have a huge impact on how
to step your pinky toe into quote unquote dating.
Speaker 3 (02:27):
And here's why.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
I feel like where we like oftentimes as women is
being able to just enjoy the company of a man,
and so I think labeling things as dating makes it
a lot more than sometimes what it is.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
So say you get yourself on dating apps.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
I'm not sure where you currently work, but I would
actually start practicing dating by literally just hanging.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Out with men.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
I think that that is very important to know how
to do without feeling the nerves of what the expectations
normally come with in terms of dating. Right, So, find
a friend that you either work with, go on the
dating apps, and say that you're just looking for friends.
I know that they have that feature on Riya. I
(03:20):
think Hinge and a lot of the I would say
all tender. Personally, from what I hear right now, tender
is just a hookup thing. And so for me, hopping
on maybe apps like Bumble, Hinge in places where maybe
people are just looking to hang out with other people, right,
that's how I would start it. I would go on
(03:43):
the apps. I would maybe see if you could hang
out with men specifically outside of work.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
And I'm saying men because that's what I assume here.
By the way, again, because you haven't.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Had sexual intimate experience, you may be attracted to women.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
I'm not sure.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
And so for me, dating looks like going out with
strangers and knowing how to break the ice, knowing how
to ask questions about them and share experiences about yourself
that you want them to know, having a good time.
I think that movies and dinner are fucking boring. It's
(04:23):
probably why I don't like to date. I don't know
if y'all remember twenty two year old. I met him
first at a bar. That was just to make sure,
you know, we both got to see each other in
person real quick. Went and grabbed a quick drink. The
second time we went out, Bitch, we went at throwing,
literally and it was really fun because we got to
(04:46):
kind of be in competition with other groups, which made
it less terrifying, and then we got to literally have fun.
We were competing against other people as a unit, and
then we got to compete against each other at the end.
It left us to not have to have all of
the stressful conversations like kids, long term goals, life goals,
(05:12):
relationship goals, traumas, like.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
The conversations that often become like.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
A little awkward or lean into sex early on, weren't
had because we were out having fun.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
So that would be like my number one advice to
you is just to find people to go out with.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
Don't pressure yourself in calling it a date. Don't be
pressured in only hanging out with men or women that
you are physically attracted to, because I think you have
to practice, and I think going out and seeing what
you enjoy yourself is a way to weed out like
(05:57):
people that'll come later down the line and waste your time.
So think of the things that you enjoy doing, whether
it be outdoor activities indoor activities like I said, and.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Practice, that's the.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Thing that I realize in terms of me not having
a relationship later on, maybe I was like really figuring
it out in real time because I hadn't had those
early on relationships.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
So for mind, you you're twenty seven, I.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
Want you to know beat you not old, this is
the time And twenty seven is such like a really
good age because you should be I assume, out of
school now in your career, and this is where you
get to have the fun with dating because the men
your age and even a little bit older, the niggas
in a thirties ain't settled yet either. You're still navigating life,
(06:57):
you're still kind of figuring it out. You don't have
kids yet, so you have the freedom to kind of
like do things on your time. And I think that's
that's great. I think that you having the fear of
not having sexual experience right now doesn't even need to
be an issue. I really don't think it needs to
(07:19):
be an issue because you shouldn't be dating to fuck.
You should be dating to figure out yourself, what you like,
what you're actually looking for in a partner in all
the things, and then in terms of your sexual intimate experience.
Take that on your time maybe and do it with
(07:40):
somebody worth it and guess what I need to gonna
hold you.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Even when you lose that virginity, he still may not
be worth it.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
In like hindsight, right, you may think, ooh, I want
to give it up to him, and it still may
be not the person that you wanted to give it to.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
Just going to it knowing that. I think we have
to go into sex and dating with.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Realistic lenses, and sometimes we don't because we're fucking growing
up with the Disney dreams of someone coming in and
being our night in shining armor.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
So that would be my advice.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
I really hope that you do, and I would love
for you d let me know how it goes, Let
me know, would love to know when you go on
your first.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
Three hangouts, call them hangouts.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Go on your first three hangouts. Please please please send
it back in and let me know how it went
your thoughts. Maybe we could do that thing live and
see if my advice ended up helping you. Just got
a little taste of the horrible decisions Patreon, but why
it's up there? Tap in for the full uncut and
way Naster episodes over on Patreon. Go to patreon dot
(08:52):
com backslash Horrible Decisions and unlock all the messyt wild
stories and bonus content you won't hear any where else.
And now here's You've Got Decisions if you would like
to have us answer your questions if you have a
terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible throatfle guess
(09:12):
what You've got Decisions, You've Got Decisions ay or Hive
really excited for you to check out this week's You've
Got Decisions, which comes as an exclusive over on the
Patreon If you didn't know, not only can you get
Horrible Decisions episodes, but you can also get bonus episodes
like this one Mandy on the Hotline, where I take
(09:35):
your voicemails and.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Give you the real Check it out. Check it out,
Check it out.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
We are gonna get now into a You've Got Decisions
slash homemail.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Y'all.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
If you want to send your questions in, please please
please send your questions in to Decisions pod at g
dot com.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
We will read them aloud, give you our.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
Unofficial experted goddamn advice, and hopefully.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
You take it or you take it with a gran
of salt. One or the other. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Now this one is quite quite interesting. This letter reads
different type of race play. Now, before we get into this,
I do want to give you guys the actual and
official definition of race play.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
All right. Race play typically refers to sexual.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Roleplay involving themes of racial stereo types or power dynamics.
It can involve scenarios where one person embodies a racial
stereotype while the other takes on a dominant or submissive role. However,
it's important to note that race play is a controversial
topic due to its potential to perpetuate harm stereotypes and
reinforce historical power and balances. Now we know about this
(11:05):
with black and white, but this one was interesting because
it's leaning in to something that's not so black and white. Now, Hi,
I am one of your twenty nine. I love that
we went up from twenty seven. I am one of
your twenty nine white listeners. However, I'm mixed and also
have Mexican so it depends on the day what I am.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
That's crazy because bitch Biracials do not operate that way.
It's not how it works.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
So I guess you you probably look more white because
the fact that you're referring to yourself as a white
listener and just not really a knowledging that you're Mexican
until you told.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Me in parentheses kind of crazy. However, I.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Am getting married to an Indian guy very soon. He
is in his early thirties. He isn't super experienced actually,
but it's eager to always learn or try, but can
be shy, etc. Now I am by and I love
(12:10):
this man, but I want to try a lot and
experiment with him. The reason I mentioned race play was
that there is a lot of cultural differences between us
and familial expectations, etc. It feels like I want to
introduce him to different things, but I'm not sure how.
We've gone to sex stores, watch spicy videos together, but
(12:32):
how do I get him to expand his curiosity? He
always makes comments that it's because I'm white that I
want to try something more exciting, or mentioned fantasies that
traditional quote unquote Indian girls don't do that slash mention
that I think he wants to have fun and experiment.
(12:52):
But I wonder if he thinks that because I'm half white,
he's attributing my sexual desires to just being able to
quote unquote do it. Sometimes it feels like he tries
to do dirty talk, and it's in regards to me
being white. I know he loves me, but I also
know that his friends make comments about him marrying a
white girl.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
Again, I'm super Mexican. Please help. Thanks.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
By the way, she refers to herself at the end
as the confused biracial bisexual girl, you sound real confused.
Speaker 3 (13:26):
Okay, a few things here, girl.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
If they talking about if they making fun of him
marrying a white girl, you can't say you super Mexican
at the end when in the very beginning you mentioned
yourself as a white listener and then said you have Mexican,
but it depends on the day.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
Gir, are you white? Stap it, stab it.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
I don't think you embrace or dive into your Mexican
or Latino's side enough at this point, Gir, are you white?
The fact that he's also attributing your sexual desires and
fantasies to being white is very interesting.
Speaker 3 (14:09):
I also I also am curious as if this is
the person you should marry.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
And here's why. I think that you both have lacked
a lot of conversation that needs to be had before marriage.
You're leaning into your cultural differences. But I think what
you need to lean into is your sexual differences. And
(14:38):
this isn't just culturally. Him thinking that you're just curious
and wanting to be a free coat and nasty because
you white, and him saying that traditional Indian girls don't
talk this way, don't have these thoughts, don't have these desires.
That would be a red flag to me, because I
wonder if he would like a traditional partner. Him comparing
(15:04):
you to the women and his culture should be alarming
out the gate. The fact that when he does do
dirty talk, it's adding your whiteness to it that should
be a red flag.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
I genuinely I don't know. I would say, before.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Y'all dive into the acts of sex, you need to
give this man a questionnaire. I think you need to
give him the BDSM questionnaire. I think you need to
give him. There's quite a few questionnaires online and I'm
going to probably see if I can add a few
for this episode specifically. But I think that what you
(15:52):
need to do is lean more into this person as
a partner, not just in marriage and not just emotionally.
But Baby, this might not be a sexual match.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
For you.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
I'm also curious if he's leaning into traditional Indian girls.
Nothing in here expresses his thoughts on your sexuality. Is
he okay with the fact that you're bisexual when you
say that you're super experienced sexually and eager to add
more things into the bedroom?
Speaker 3 (16:26):
Bitch?
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Did you bring up that you want him to eat
two couchies? Did you bring up that you want to
eat coochie in front of him or without him? Like,
in what elements of your bisexuality have you had this
conversation with him? If he's bringing up how traditional Indian
girls are, because I don't know if traditional Indian girls
are just out here.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Eating Indian cuchie. I just don't know.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
And I think that that's what you need to goddamn ask.
Outside of that, I would, I would, I would. I
don't know when you're getting married, And again, this would
be a question if I was able to ask you live.
But there is a lot of things that seems to
be missing in terms of what you truly expressed to him,
(17:08):
what he's actually comfortable with. And I think that y'all
need to have that conversation around your boundaries and what
that look like because it's given. Not only are you
confused by racial bisexual, but I think that you're heavily
confused on where this relationship essentially could end up without
(17:31):
the right conversations that need to be had.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
And I'm gonna leave it there.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
I ain't gonna hold you, I'm not gonna say your name,
but I would love you to write in and let
me know what the conversation looked like around your sexuality
with him and what his boundaries are, what are his
hard nos? Because I'm wondering if his hard nos and
(17:57):
boundaries would actually make you not want to be married
to him or in a long standing relationship, if in
fact it's going to limit your sexual fantasies, desires, and
what you essentially see your sex life as being. You're
only twenty nine, he's in his early thirties. This is
(18:18):
something that can change over time. But I'd be curious
as to your comfortability with walking down the aisle without
all of these questions answered. Again, if you want to
send in your questions, send it to decisions pod at
gmail dot com. Send in your voicemails to nine seven
(18:40):
three nine three to two zero two to SELM. I
think we're gonna give you guys this week, maybe another BTS.
So you got Manny on the hotline, go throw some
BTS on the timeline hopefully this week for y'all. And
I'm just like, you know, really loving you guys, really
(19:02):
excited about the content that we're going to be giving
y'all this month, specifically because you know, anyways, guys, thank
you guys for tuning in to another Mandy on the Hotline,
Thank you guys for sending in your questions, and hopefully
I'm able to help y'all live a better emotional, sexual,
(19:25):
liberated laugh.
Speaker 3 (19:27):
All right, y'all, peace, I want to hear more.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Head on over to patreon dot com backslash w h
O R e ibl E decisions, See you over there,
Let's go ahead and play our first voicemail and see
what they have to say.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Good morning, Mandy is the fifty a Free Jersey, big
fan of you and Bazy from Horrible to Station. So
I wanted to call because my question was, as someone
who's fairly knew to dating in relationships, how should I
start doing that in my daily life? Most of my
(00:35):
school career was mostly being in education, so I've never
really had a chune to see. I'm actually twenty seven,
and I haven't had any type of special experience, so
that's always something I'm stressing about when it comes to
starting to actually really date. So, as somebody who started
(01:00):
real relationships in their thirteen how should I start with
being twenty seven, not having really any relationship experience at all,
no dating experience in those sexual intimate experience as a
twenty seven year old, how should I do with that?
For my stuff? Thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Not the shade in the voicemail talk about since you,
you know, didn't have your real relationship until thirty, how
do I date this?
Speaker 3 (01:32):
I actually really like this question because I think that
there is.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
A misconception but a lack of knowledge around how to
properly quote unquote date. Right, So, just to recap, you
are finally interested in dating at the age of twenty seven,
you focus mostly on your school career in your early twenties,
and you have not had any sex.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
I would be curious if it's just not pressing.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
If you are a sexual and that's not something that
is important to you, I would be like, these are
questions I would ask if this was live. But you
having no dating experience and no sexual or intimate experience
I think doesn't necessarily have a huge impact on how
to step your pinky toe into quote unquote dating.
Speaker 3 (02:27):
And here's why.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
I feel like where we like oftentimes as women is
being able to just enjoy the company of a man,
and so I think labeling things as dating makes it
a lot more than sometimes what it is.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
So say you get yourself on dating apps.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
I'm not sure where you currently work, but I would
actually start practicing dating by literally just hanging.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Out with men.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
I think that that is very important to know how
to do without feeling the nerves of what the expectations
normally come with in terms of dating. Right, So, find
a friend that you either work with, go on the
dating apps, and say that you're just looking for friends.
I know that they have that feature on Riya. I
(03:20):
think Hinge and a lot of the I would say
all tender. Personally, from what I hear right now, tender
is just a hookup thing. And so for me, hopping
on maybe apps like Bumble, Hinge in places where maybe
people are just looking to hang out with other people, right,
that's how I would start it. I would go on
(03:43):
the apps. I would maybe see if you could hang
out with men specifically outside of work.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
And I'm saying men because that's what I assume here.
By the way, again, because you haven't.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Had sexual intimate experience, you may be attracted to women.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
I'm not sure.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
And so for me, dating looks like going out with
strangers and knowing how to break the ice, knowing how
to ask questions about them and share experiences about yourself
that you want them to know, having a good time.
I think that movies and dinner are fucking boring. It's
(04:23):
probably why I don't like to date. I don't know
if y'all remember twenty two year old. I met him
first at a bar. That was just to make sure,
you know, we both got to see each other in
person real quick. Went and grabbed a quick drink. The
second time we went out, Bitch, we went at throwing,
literally and it was really fun because we got to
(04:46):
kind of be in competition with other groups, which made
it less terrifying, and then we got to literally have fun.
We were competing against other people as a unit, and
then we got to compete against each other at the end.
It left us to not have to have all of
the stressful conversations like kids, long term goals, life goals,
(05:12):
relationship goals, traumas, like.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
The conversations that often become like.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
A little awkward or lean into sex early on, weren't
had because we were out having fun.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
So that would be like my number one advice to
you is just to find people to go out with.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
Don't pressure yourself in calling it a date. Don't be
pressured in only hanging out with men or women that
you are physically attracted to, because I think you have
to practice, and I think going out and seeing what
you enjoy yourself is a way to weed out like
(05:57):
people that'll come later down the line and waste your time.
So think of the things that you enjoy doing, whether
it be outdoor activities indoor activities like I said, and.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Practice, that's the.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Thing that I realize in terms of me not having
a relationship later on, maybe I was like really figuring
it out in real time because I hadn't had those
early on relationships.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
So for mind, you you're twenty seven, I.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
Want you to know beat you not old, this is
the time And twenty seven is such like a really
good age because you should be I assume, out of
school now in your career, and this is where you
get to have the fun with dating because the men
your age and even a little bit older, the niggas
in a thirties ain't settled yet either. You're still navigating life,
(06:57):
you're still kind of figuring it out. You don't have
kids yet, so you have the freedom to kind of
like do things on your time. And I think that's
that's great. I think that you having the fear of
not having sexual experience right now doesn't even need to
be an issue. I really don't think it needs to
(07:19):
be an issue because you shouldn't be dating to fuck.
You should be dating to figure out yourself, what you like,
what you're actually looking for in a partner in all
the things, and then in terms of your sexual intimate experience.
Take that on your time maybe and do it with
(07:40):
somebody worth it and guess what I need to gonna
hold you.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Even when you lose that virginity, he still may not
be worth it.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
In like hindsight, right, you may think, ooh, I want
to give it up to him, and it still may
be not the person that you wanted to give it to.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
Just going to it knowing that. I think we have
to go into sex and dating with.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Realistic lenses, and sometimes we don't because we're fucking growing
up with the Disney dreams of someone coming in and
being our night in shining armor.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
So that would be my advice.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
I really hope that you do, and I would love
for you d let me know how it goes, Let
me know, would love to know when you go on
your first.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
Three hangouts, call them hangouts.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Go on your first three hangouts. Please please please send
it back in and let me know how it went
your thoughts. Maybe we could do that thing live and
see if my advice ended up helping you. Just got
a little taste of the horrible decisions Patreon, but why
it's up there? Tap in for the full uncut and
way Naster episodes over on Patreon. Go to patreon dot
(08:52):
com backslash Horrible Decisions and unlock all the messyt wild
stories and bonus content you won't hear any where else.
And now here's You've Got Decisions if you would like
to have us answer your questions if you have a
terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible throatfle guess
(09:12):
what You've got Decisions, You've Got Decisions ay or Hive
really excited for you to check out this week's You've
Got Decisions, which comes as an exclusive over on the
Patreon If you didn't know, not only can you get
Horrible Decisions episodes, but you can also get bonus episodes
like this one Mandy on the Hotline, where I take
(09:35):
your voicemails and.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Give you the real Check it out. Check it out,
Check it out.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
We are gonna get now into a You've Got Decisions
slash homemail.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Y'all.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
If you want to send your questions in, please please
please send your questions in to Decisions pod at g
dot com.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
We will read them aloud, give you our.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
Unofficial experted goddamn advice, and hopefully.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
You take it or you take it with a gran
of salt. One or the other. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Now this one is quite quite interesting. This letter reads
different type of race play. Now, before we get into this,
I do want to give you guys the actual and
official definition of race play.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
All right. Race play typically refers to sexual.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Roleplay involving themes of racial stereo types or power dynamics.
It can involve scenarios where one person embodies a racial
stereotype while the other takes on a dominant or submissive role. However,
it's important to note that race play is a controversial
topic due to its potential to perpetuate harm stereotypes and
reinforce historical power and balances. Now we know about this
(11:05):
with black and white, but this one was interesting because
it's leaning in to something that's not so black and white. Now, Hi,
I am one of your twenty nine. I love that
we went up from twenty seven. I am one of
your twenty nine white listeners. However, I'm mixed and also
have Mexican so it depends on the day what I am.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
That's crazy because bitch Biracials do not operate that way.
It's not how it works.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
So I guess you you probably look more white because
the fact that you're referring to yourself as a white
listener and just not really a knowledging that you're Mexican
until you told.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Me in parentheses kind of crazy. However, I.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Am getting married to an Indian guy very soon. He
is in his early thirties. He isn't super experienced actually,
but it's eager to always learn or try, but can
be shy, etc. Now I am by and I love
(12:10):
this man, but I want to try a lot and
experiment with him. The reason I mentioned race play was
that there is a lot of cultural differences between us
and familial expectations, etc. It feels like I want to
introduce him to different things, but I'm not sure how.
We've gone to sex stores, watch spicy videos together, but
(12:32):
how do I get him to expand his curiosity? He
always makes comments that it's because I'm white that I
want to try something more exciting, or mentioned fantasies that
traditional quote unquote Indian girls don't do that slash mention
that I think he wants to have fun and experiment.
(12:52):
But I wonder if he thinks that because I'm half white,
he's attributing my sexual desires to just being able to
quote unquote do it. Sometimes it feels like he tries
to do dirty talk, and it's in regards to me
being white. I know he loves me, but I also
know that his friends make comments about him marrying a
white girl.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
Again, I'm super Mexican. Please help. Thanks.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
By the way, she refers to herself at the end
as the confused biracial bisexual girl, you sound real confused.
Speaker 3 (13:26):
Okay, a few things here, girl.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
If they talking about if they making fun of him
marrying a white girl, you can't say you super Mexican
at the end when in the very beginning you mentioned
yourself as a white listener and then said you have Mexican,
but it depends on the day.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
Gir, are you white? Stap it, stab it.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
I don't think you embrace or dive into your Mexican
or Latino's side enough at this point, Gir, are you white?
The fact that he's also attributing your sexual desires and
fantasies to being white is very interesting.
Speaker 3 (14:09):
I also I also am curious as if this is
the person you should marry.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
And here's why. I think that you both have lacked
a lot of conversation that needs to be had before marriage.
You're leaning into your cultural differences. But I think what
you need to lean into is your sexual differences. And
(14:38):
this isn't just culturally. Him thinking that you're just curious
and wanting to be a free coat and nasty because
you white, and him saying that traditional Indian girls don't
talk this way, don't have these thoughts, don't have these desires.
That would be a red flag to me, because I
wonder if he would like a traditional partner. Him comparing
(15:04):
you to the women and his culture should be alarming
out the gate. The fact that when he does do
dirty talk, it's adding your whiteness to it that should
be a red flag.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
I genuinely I don't know. I would say, before.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Y'all dive into the acts of sex, you need to
give this man a questionnaire. I think you need to
give him the BDSM questionnaire. I think you need to
give him. There's quite a few questionnaires online and I'm
going to probably see if I can add a few
for this episode specifically. But I think that what you
(15:52):
need to do is lean more into this person as
a partner, not just in marriage and not just emotionally.
But Baby, this might not be a sexual match.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
For you.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
I'm also curious if he's leaning into traditional Indian girls.
Nothing in here expresses his thoughts on your sexuality. Is
he okay with the fact that you're bisexual when you
say that you're super experienced sexually and eager to add
more things into the bedroom?
Speaker 3 (16:26):
Bitch?
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Did you bring up that you want him to eat
two couchies? Did you bring up that you want to
eat coochie in front of him or without him? Like,
in what elements of your bisexuality have you had this
conversation with him? If he's bringing up how traditional Indian
girls are, because I don't know if traditional Indian girls
are just out here.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Eating Indian cuchie. I just don't know.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
And I think that that's what you need to goddamn ask.
Outside of that, I would, I would, I would. I
don't know when you're getting married, And again, this would
be a question if I was able to ask you live.
But there is a lot of things that seems to
be missing in terms of what you truly expressed to him,
(17:08):
what he's actually comfortable with. And I think that y'all
need to have that conversation around your boundaries and what
that look like because it's given. Not only are you
confused by racial bisexual, but I think that you're heavily
confused on where this relationship essentially could end up without
(17:31):
the right conversations that need to be had.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
And I'm gonna leave it there.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
I ain't gonna hold you, I'm not gonna say your name,
but I would love you to write in and let
me know what the conversation looked like around your sexuality
with him and what his boundaries are, what are his
hard nos? Because I'm wondering if his hard nos and
(17:57):
boundaries would actually make you not want to be married
to him or in a long standing relationship, if in
fact it's going to limit your sexual fantasies, desires, and
what you essentially see your sex life as being. You're
only twenty nine, he's in his early thirties. This is
(18:18):
something that can change over time. But I'd be curious
as to your comfortability with walking down the aisle without
all of these questions answered. Again, if you want to
send in your questions, send it to decisions pod at
gmail dot com. Send in your voicemails to nine seven
(18:40):
three nine three to two zero two to SELM. I
think we're gonna give you guys this week, maybe another BTS.
So you got Manny on the hotline, go throw some
BTS on the timeline hopefully this week for y'all. And
I'm just like, you know, really loving you guys, really
(19:02):
excited about the content that we're going to be giving
y'all this month, specifically because you know, anyways, guys, thank
you guys for tuning in to another Mandy on the Hotline,
Thank you guys for sending in your questions, and hopefully
I'm able to help y'all live a better emotional, sexual,
(19:25):
liberated laugh.
Speaker 3 (19:27):
All right, y'all, peace, I want to hear more.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Head on over to patreon dot com backslash w h
O R e ibl E decisions, See you over there,
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