Season 8, Episode 1 with Miles Gray

Anna, Nick and special guest Miles Gray talk season 8, episode 1 of Below Deck.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Deckheads, a production of I Her Radio. Welcome
to Deckheads with your hosts Nick and Anna, broadcasting from
the bottom of the boat below below deck whoa, I'm horny,
all ya talk all the time. I'm having a party.

(00:21):
We're shoveling cold to keep this show afloat. I love cocaine.
We're off the map in international waters. I need some trama.
Me hide that cocaine. Never in my nose. Shut see
you know I'm in an open relationship below deck wo

(00:44):
me what Deckheads? Hey? Everybody? Anna? My voice just went
out in a terrible Hi. Nick, Hi, are you anna?
We've done it? Yeah, we did it. I'm on our
of the days of fourteen episodes of Yes, Yes, we
can see our families again. No no, no, no, now weekly?

(01:05):
Can you believe it? I know? And we have a
very shul girl. I was hoping we could do one
of those things that I love in podcasting, where you
talk for one hour without introducing the guests. No. No,
well that's why you get two hosts. Okay, we have

(01:27):
a guest. It's back. I haven't been right months. I
know I haven't. The thing is, we don't I take
it back. Hold on, hold on, hold on, what you're wrong?
It's good to see you. Alright, guys, we have a
great guest today to talk about the new season of
Below Deck regular season A, and we're talking about episode
one and this guest he's one of my best friends

(01:50):
out of necessity. He he hosts a podcast with my
other best friend who never responds to my texts or
calls or emails, because you know what, that's what best
friends do. They ignore each other. And I learned exactly Nick,
That's what I've been telling you. Oh, I just excited

(02:11):
to me surrounded by the Have you ever gotten a
text back? No? Never, You're undeterred every time. Well, that's
what best friendship is. Well, anyway, so this this gem
of a best friend. He hosts the daily site. Guys.
He hosts our sister podcast four twenty Day Fiance. Yes,

(02:32):
that shows about ninety day fiance. If you love reality TV,
you will love these shows. The almost landed. It where
joined by Miles of Gray. Who's that you welcome? Thank
you for having me. I'm what it's like. Below Deck

(02:54):
is a show I watch a lot and I actually
never talked about. So it's nice to be here. Yes, well,
you not talking about Is it such a secret for you?
Why is it a secret for me? Yeah? Oh, I
don't know, you know, I think I just had that.
I didn't. I wasn't picking my friends well, you know,
just around a bunch of people that didn't know how
to talk about the seafaring ways of captain's sandy and

(03:16):
what's the other one's name? Rick? Oh, Glenn, Glenn, same Vie,
same Vibery. There might have been a Rick somewhere in there.
Glenn is the sailing one, right, Yeah, yeah, Glenn makes
cookies in the off season, and then during sailing season.
He um, he captains a ship, and he um, he

(03:39):
always must be tethered to the boat for fear of
blowing away in the wind. That's a that's a that's
a pretty reasonable fear. I would say, yeah, sure, below deck,
I think um flies a little under the radar. It
doesn't get the same press as a ninety day fiancee
or a housewives, But I feel like the audience is huge, right,
Like that's the true silent minority or silent majority, where

(04:02):
it's just like everyone's like, oh yeah, I know. Below
It's like there's a really good chance and if you
watch other reality shows, you kind of probably with below
deck at some level because it's like, I think it
serves this thing of being messy sometimes as a reality show,
but also like the sort of you know, like paras
social relationships you you build with like people in a
different class than you, and you're like, oh, that's sick. Oh,

(04:24):
I wouldn't act like that if I was on a y'all,
I would be so well behaved and so grateful. But yeah,
it's got it all. I love. Yeah, a nation that
pretends not to watch a show that now has three
different versions of it, right, I know it's but it's
so good because when you get boats, uh, you get
views uh, and then you get like characters like Captain

(04:48):
Lee who say things like I'm gonna drag my Dick
threw a bunch of broken whiskey bottles before I do that,
And you're like, what, dude, why would you say that?
And it's great but he doesn't. Well yeah, and they
let it. They let it in so much like imagine
being the editor of this show, and every time he
says whiskey bottles, your instinct is to be like, well, like,

(05:10):
I gotta take that out. He said too much, and
the producers are like, no, that's all he ever said,
isolate that. See this man's dick, it's so fun. His
dick must be so fun. How many fucking broken whiskey
bottles has he looks? Looks like a possums nose? Okay,

(05:36):
questions a possums nose, bloody because they's some straight possum
facts right here. Because your eyesights so poor, they use
their nose basically to fucking make sense of the world.
So that ends up being the thing that interacts with
fucking screen doors, jagged wires, fences, traps. So yeah, that's
why possums got the messed up grill fun. All right, well,

(06:01):
my man with the possum fact. There we go, straight
possible fact. I know, we we got to give him.
I don't have any possums. Here, we go deal with
the here, how about this, we're technically opossum is actually
in the U S possum facts with miles of greg
because it was sniffing because it's nose. Yeah, hell yeah,

(06:21):
there we go proboscis tips. All right, enough about possums. Okay,
I've come up with some questions for our guests. Nick.
This is this new segment. We are going to try
what the new segments? Yes, Unfortunately I forgot to co
with a fucking hear who this yeah segment for you,
it's called what Yeah? This is what the four? So

(06:47):
I just have a few questions. First of all, how
long have you been watching Below Deck? Wow? For me,
I've been. I think I've seen almost I think every
season of Did you See Sailing? Yeah, I want saying
it's like it's weird. I don't know, it's it's it's
such a low effort show for me to watch, like

(07:09):
when and it was like, oh, yeah, like we're gonna
do the episode blah blah blah, Like I don't know,
Like I don't know if you're gonna watch them, Like
I watched that ship when it's like within forty eight
hours of it coming out, like it's like it anchors
my Monday somehow. Yeah. But yeah, like I don't know.
I think it was because in the beginning, I think

(07:29):
when did it start like to like ten years ago? Almost? Yeah,
they started filming in two thousand and eleven, but it
didn't start airing I think to like two Okay, So
I was still like in the midst of like being
awfully broken out of work and like living at my
mom's and just like being like I'll literally escaped to
a reality world of boats. Uh, and then also being away, Yeah,

(07:54):
I was like and then like talking about these people,
like these people don't know, like they're not a millennial
who just got crushed by the session. Oh and they're
out here party on the yacht like it's all good.
So like part of it, like I don't know, help
kept kept me alive through hate. It serves, it served
me many purposes. But yeah, I've pretty much. I would
say maybe there's a couple of seasons of Sandies seasons

(08:16):
where I maybe missed one or two, like where some
of the drama I didn't quite connect for me, But
I think that was when I was working. Okay, that's
my next question. What do you think has been your
favorite season? M oh m hmm. I don't know. They're
all kind of like they all kind of hit the same,
you know, like they'll have moments that I really enjoy

(08:38):
about each one. Like the last season was just like
all the fucking narking that was going on from Aliah
and Ship, Like I hated that, but I loved it
too because I'm like this, yo, let her fucking let
her vibe with her you know, prescription pa, she doesn't
have a prescription before and her CBD pen or whatever

(08:58):
the funk it is, uh or that other season where
like that fake ass chef got caught out that Yeah,
that's it's always a Captain Sandy season that the chef
doesn't come through. Yeah. I felt bad for what was
his name, cookei Keko Keko. He He was clearly such

(09:19):
a like it was he was so transparently privileged, like
in the way he'd be like, yeah, you know because
my chef when I was a little boy, taught me
how to cook this food, Like fool, what are you
talking about? Also, we all love Kiko, but his job
is to cook for a Russian oligarch, like nephew of Putin.
He's just on Putin's boat getting paid by Putin's evil money.

(09:43):
Is that what he does? Now? Yeah, that's what he
did before the show like that, that's that's I'm not
used to this because I just cook for one guy.
Oh wow, that's tight. Honestly, Kiko Coke, you fucked up, bro.
You shouldn't have left that that oligarch you found yourself
on a boat where your self esteem took such a hit,

(10:04):
and all he could do is plays guitar, and he said,
he goes. He says that, he says, when you take
a chance, you take it because he's from Brazil, so
you know Brazil, Um, you either get kidnapped or you
take the chance you have. So that's what he did.
You either get kidnapped or you escape. Yeah, and uh yeah,
I loved his stories always like my family because his

(10:25):
English was so broken and be like my family. We
had a paint store and then the paint store got robbed,
Like what happened? What's And he's like and then my
father was broke and you're like, what is the Like
I need more details? Key, how much money was in
that till you got to use a bank? You know
how it was? I don't know, but he was like,

(10:46):
you know how it is. And then everyone stole from
him the paint and you're like, what is happening? What
kind of paint was it? I mean, what the fun
like that? I don't know lots writing on this paint
store or maybe he was describing an art gallery terribly.
Yeahs robbed, flip think your paint stuff your paintings. But

(11:07):
then he's like, but don't worry, my parents made it back.
And you're like, where I need the details, Kiko. But
oh the other thing that got me about that season
was what's homegirl's name from South Africa? Barbie? Or what's
her Bugsy? And she how she was loving saying webs
so she could never say it right. She's like, this

(11:27):
is ourgos Manchemos, You're gonna love it. Oh, and this
is from the chef DC is weros Manea And You're like,
it's tough for her to think with all of those
accessories on her head just dragging. I think she can
hear like radio frequencies because she's just pulling in the
like I think's basically a ham radio to her head

(11:50):
at this point. All right, Actually, for my last and
final question before we end the show, who has been
your favorite cast men throughout all the series? Eyes? Someone
who like I think I would just be able to
like hang out with. Maybe Asha. She's Asha's just like

(12:12):
so laid back, like to the point where she's always like,
what the fund is up with everybody? And that's how
I feel. So I relate to Asia the most, probably
fucking get it on a level. I couldn't have expected
this show enough where I'm like, man, funk that person, Like,
oh they're too uptight, Like they're too serious about this.

(12:33):
I think Asia has the perfect balance of like she
puts in a good shift, you know what I mean,
but she also doesn't take that ship personally. But then
she's sensitive to like in the right ways, like nobody
wants to get yelled at by some fucking chef who's
having a who's just on one and being like gas
lit by some assholes. So you know, I feel Asha.
I think she has her head in the right place,

(12:54):
and she just feels like the most relatable of like
someone who's like, yes, I am on a reality show
where everyone is so unreasonable, yeah, and it's so full.
I don't know. Oh my god, I need to touch
his body. He wasn't even like them. I'm sorry. I

(13:18):
didn't know where to put my hand. I love She's
my absolute favorite person that's ever been. No one can
fit more syllables into a word than I, even with
her own name. I said the guy Sha gives Pelaysia
love it. The only other answer I would have accepted
for favorite cast member is horsecock David from the first

(13:42):
season horse Cock. That's right up his porn and he
has a huge dick, like, oh yeah, you can check
that out. We should link to it. Put that in
the chat real quick. He's saying he's a tripod, dude, No,
he's got to And he did like he was in
the military. I think Marines maybe, I don't know, but

(14:04):
he did a lot of like military porn, like the haircut,
like and then like a huge, huge dick, but such
a great guy, like I really like his name is David.
I really liked him. What's my ms? Oh my god,
all right, let's get into it. So, yeah, Below Deck,
season A, episode one. Guys, we're back, baby, it's a

(14:27):
new season there finally. Oh wait, you're dropping horse in
the chat. Horse in the chat, Horse in the chat.
Oh my god, Oh god, I haven't looked at it.
So it hits the same man, it's so you know,

(14:50):
it's too early. I don't even know, like a joke, like, yeah, yeah,
I dropped in the chat. I don't know why, Like
I reverted to some like perverted fourteen year old kid,
like dude, look at this on Rotten dot com. Uh,
And I think so, dude, there's nobody that doesn't want
to see anybody's anything. The war horses. That really caught
me off guard. Okay, sorry, guys, back at porn, I

(15:17):
guess so, dude, al right, I love more porn in
the Zach's head just creeped into view. Oh horse cock
horse Cox in town. Yeah, a stable hold on God,
that really fucking it's the same man, It's just so intense.

(15:40):
Say that again. Alright. So, yes, it's a new season.
They're finally back in the Caribbean. I don't know if
you guys realized they had to leave the Caribbean for
a while because of Hurricane Maria. Yes, Mariah, Yeah, yeah,
they haven't been able to keep back until they could rebuild. Yeah,
but they're in Antiqua, I believe. Now. So the show

(16:01):
starts on February. They've dated it so you have a
sense of coronavirus. So it starts February. That's the first day.
M hmm. Okay, now we're in it. We're in the corona,
all right. I'm just gonna go over. The cast and
crew are real quick. So we have Eddie. Eddie is back. Wow, Eddie,

(16:22):
it's been a while. I can't. I have no emotions
of what about Eddie, like when it's like Eddie's but
I don't know. I think this is the other thing.
You guys have watched everything fairly recently, and like I
have not seen season one since it first aired, you
know what I mean, Like I have not revisited. You
probably didn't even recognize that cock. No, I didn't. It

(16:45):
took me a second. It took me a good forty
five seconds straight staring until I realized, wait, I know
that guy. Yeah, like so so like when I saw Eddie,
I was like, oh yeah, but I felt like what,
I don't know? He wasn't. I didn't his first I
should of me was like, oh here we go. Eddie's
bos this season, Eddie one, Eddie is like a Jim

(17:05):
Carrey wanna be He fucked Rocky in the laundry room
and then denied. Eddie is always doing bits bulk calling Eddie,
you know, and but that's that's Eddie, Like he's just
like whoa. What's incredible is that Eddie is not even

(17:30):
the only Eddie this you know, there's a female Eddie
this season. Rachel the chef is the female Eddie. She's
like why incredible. I can't wait. I'm gonna this charter
in the mouth. Rachel all right, um, sorry, that's a captain.
That's a captain. Lee line right, I'm gonna this charter

(17:51):
in the mouth. I'm gonna drag this charter through ten
miles of broken dicks. That's broken dicks. That's the thing
I'm learning is in the after show, there was sounded
like there was some tension. Eddie was implying there was
tension between him and Rachel, which makes me think Eddie
doesn't like when there was a second Eddie came up

(18:11):
two class clouds. Uh well, anyway, apparently took five years
off and now he's older and wiser, but it's still
the same guy, which I'm like, Yeah, which you are
is you're a jokester. You love to be the center
of attention, but the second you look like a fool,
you turn on everyone. Mm hmmm, So, Miles, you're not
familiar with how we last saw him hooking up with

(18:33):
everybody's favorite Rocky and then denying it in gaslighting her
in front of everyone, and he just looked so yeah,
it was one of the worst looks. That's so, yes,
I remember that. I think that's maybe why I didn't like.
I think I had like cauterized that part of my

(18:56):
heart for him when I was going on like, Yo,
that's a whack ass fucking move. Be like, no, dude,
I don't know what's funhed on, Dude, she's a liar, Dude,
she's captain. Bro, she's captain. That's all cap right there. Yeah,
not on television. Disgusting, and that's why he left. He
decided not to go do the show again, but then
has come back to be made a fool again. I

(19:18):
can't wait. Ah, yeah, okay. We also have a new
chief stew, Francesca. She seems intense. She's from Australia. I
don't know, she's like right drive on attention to detail
and it's like, yeah, we'll see, honey, we'll see. Yeah.
See cut to like that clip of her just crying
robe and I was like, what, I thought you were
a hard ass, but we're all sensitive. Chief. You can

(19:40):
tell she's the chief stew because she's the oldest blonde
and that's that's apparently what a chief stew is on
this show. Yeah. It's almost like, yeah, the same like
visual cues of like a like how Hollywood treats actresses
sort of like, Okay, now, now you're more of a
chief stew vibe when I look at you. Yeah, I

(20:01):
don't think you'd be playing just a normal stewardess. Yeah,
Rachel is chef. She says, she's really laser focused in
the galley, but outside of the galley she is Eddie.
So she's ace ventral. Do not go in there, my
galley ship in the sink. Honestly, please, somebody stopped me.

(20:25):
She's she takes a different approach than most of the
other chefs. I mean, yes, she's angry and upset right
about stuff that is not on boat, but she wants
to bring it on and then yell at other people
about how she lost her bag very specifically my Louis Batton. Okay,

(20:45):
you know it had my Louis Batton, and I don't
know you, I know, like, okay, so now the only
thing I can glean from my first interaction with you
is you are very superficial and tied to your material items.
But not even that. It's like clearly she kind of
reminded me she has like a I need your keys
right now. Yeah, that's the only thing, Like why weren't
your keys out You're in a different country. Also, what

(21:06):
is the number one rule of airports? Don't leave your
ship out. Yeah, she's like one of those people who's
like professionally has their ship together, but the outside of
like work, they would like to leave the oven open
and burn their house down, you know, like her whole
when she's being like, uh, and then I left my

(21:28):
bag and then I came back and everything was gone,
and you're like, yeah, yeah, that's how it works. Yeah,
you somebody saying, Okay, that's an opportunity right there, this
like space person is going to leave there Louis Vuitton
bag and like Mercedes key out. It's almost like she's

(21:49):
been like, hello, everyone, I'd like to advertise that probably
a lot of valuable ship over here. I'm gonna place
this like I don't also understand how there was an
insert shot when she's describing what was taken from her
and a little Louis baton while it's like took that photo. Yeah, alright, Yeah,

(22:13):
she's gonna be interesting. I'm looking forward to her plot line.
All right, let's go over the rest of the cast.
So James the dead Hand, this guy is going to
be a ship show. He's like, Papal pre judge me
and think I'm will play it, but I'm a flu
I don't even know the guy. I'm going to be
the one getting kicked out of the clubs. Yeah, I

(22:34):
was like, okay, Elizabeth is the spiritual stew. She's like,
I'm just trying to get in touch with everything that's
like mystical and I'm like, you're annoying. I can't feel it.
Which one is that one that's the American? Yeah, she's
the second stew I believe, I don't know. At one
point she says, now must day, Okay, that's not my vibe, right,

(22:54):
is giving me more orgasms? She said. She's the one
that says she's the walking deaf nition of t M
I uh and and by walking she means like slow
walking because apparently she's one of the slow stupids. She's
a she's definitely on turtle mode. Yeah. Then there's Avery,

(23:14):
who's a dead hand, who's why why I even talk
about him? He's out of here. And then there's Shane,
who I Shane's a fucking fool. I don't know who
this fool things he is. He's another dead hand. He's like,
I'm a SoCal surfer. But you know what, I'm not
a stoner. I'm actually an environmentalist at it. Whoa, I

(23:37):
was like environmentalist. That's like what me and my friends
would joke when we'd be smoking. We would be like,
we're environmentalists. I was like, you just called yourself a stoner,
especially when you're calling someone out on their like shells
that they're like, you're like, whoa, whoa. I hate to
like suck it up over here, but like you're not
supposed to take those shelves. I mean I get it, Like, yeah,
if you're not supposed to that, yeah, you let him know.
But like that, you definitely have so cal stoner, like

(23:59):
super hippie vibes. You can't call yourself an environmentalist when
you're that stupid, because then you just you give a
bad name to environmentalists, people who are like making their
lives work the environment. He can't a stupid person can't
adopt and he issed that they did not earn in college. Well,
apparently went to UC Berkeley, so yeah, he's got family money.

(24:21):
Never mind, you can go to UC Berkeley and not graduates.
The vibe of someone who has never had to like
sweat before. That's true. Well, I just can't wait till
we get to the straws. Well that's the thing. It's
like he reminds me of someone who would like be
standing on the corner with a clipboard trying to get
your attention, you know, and you're like, so like, hey,

(24:42):
I got a second for the environment. I'm like no,
I mean plus like not what? Okay? Who want to
who you with? All right? Thanks a lot, man. So
I'm working with a sustainable nonprofit right now. Like we're
trying to figure out how to take like a decomposed
like cshelves and like turn them into like decorative like
gardening stuff. So you like this is this is a
business fool. Yeah, right now we're just trying to get

(25:03):
money to rent a garage. Yeah that's cool, that's cool.
That's cool. Um. Also, you got that you just hit
me with like five I don't know whatever did I
can hit my dad up anyway, exactly, all right there
on my Sienna, which we've seen this boat before, Mamma, Yeah,
I guess they like this one. Mm not my favorite. Yeah,

(25:26):
I don't know why they switched boats. Honestly, what do
you mean to mix it up. The boats. We don't
care what the boat looks like. I wish I knew
the boat, you know, and I knew secret rooms like oh,
like the guests did yeah, like the guests this time.
Remember when he came to like, oh my friends there,
and I was like, okay, you're so good with your money.

(25:48):
Your friends regularly pass out on this yacht. Imagine trying
to hang out with this guy. It's a fucking panic
attack to it. That's the other thing I don't understand.
When I watched this show. I always like, these people
are fucked up and I I don't even want to do
with them. And then I'm like, but let me watch
from Afar, Like it's like this fucked up menagerie of
like wealthy or people who are just burning through money.

(26:10):
That's why we're watching. Were like, I would never do
you guys ever do thought experiments on how we would
be on on the Well, we actually do live on
the yacht, and we brought from the yacht guy. Yeah
you're zooming in, but we we are on the I
mean as guests, though not as people who are just
kind of barnacling away for a free passage. Oh you

(26:32):
mean the upstairs footsteps. Yeah, what if you're a footsteps person? Footstep? Wow,
I've never imagined cowering, right. I'm you know, it's like
I don't have any money, sure, but I am very particular.
Like when I go to a restaurant, I there's like,
you know, fifteen point checklist that if you don't do it,

(26:55):
I'm like, what this place needs to be shut down?
A right? This seems to be burned. You don't need
to have money to know how it's supposed to be done, right,
But you're saying so you would be very particular on
this for sure, dude, Like what what would be a
thing if you had to have it on the yacht?
Like you know, like everyone's like everyone drinks espresso martinis

(27:17):
for whatever. I think because they can't bring cocaine on
the boat, so they feel like that's the closest thing
or they do and they just they're good about hiding it.
Uh yeah. No. The kind of thing that I would
get really upset about is if like they brought out
food with no utensils and then they just like sat
there and then it was like minutes and I'm just
staring at food with the utensils I would flip out, dude,

(27:42):
would you would you do the thing where you're passive
aggressively just start eating the just you know, food, like
with your bare hand and be like, oh, I'm sorry,
I didn't I thought this was Viking dinner night. I
would take handfuls of it and throw it at my
guests so they could eat it too. All right, you know,
on that note, let's take a quick break. But look,

(28:03):
I don't know, man, They're just footsteps to me. We'll
be right back, and we're back ship because there's just
footsteps to me. Well, anyway, so Eddie shows up first.
Apparently he's been in Baltimore at a harbor tug. I

(28:23):
don't know what any of that means. Oh for sure,
I used to live outside of Baltimore, so did work.
I've never heard of that. Oh okay, well, Captain Lee
is m I a oh no, this is this is
the equivalent of a park job, Miles. On this show.
Once an episode there is a big cliffhanger, you know that,

(28:47):
like they are not going to be able to park well,
and then it comes back and guess what, buddy, they
fucking nail it. Yeah, every time, And then that this
Captain Lee injury is the of of a of a
scary parking job. Yeah. Thing, It's like as if we
haven't seen the promo, like we've seen we know he's fine,

(29:11):
you know, there's yeah, we know this season didn't just
end abruptly because Captain Lee couldn't do it. Also, yeah,
apparently he fell in the shower. He busted a couple
of ribs. He may need surgery. Uh, He's sitting in
a wheelchair with all his gold jewelry on. He loves
his gold jewel baby looked like a like a Filipino

(29:33):
tennis pro with his like matching Adidas outfit and his
gold I was like, this is my homies uncle right here.
But his whole thing. It almost felt like the producers
told him, like you're saying Nick to create more tension
than they're needed to be like where he was almost
like I don't I don't need fucking surgery kidding me.
It's like, yeah, but police Captain Lee, like this will help,
like just to create a little bit more dramas, like

(29:55):
I'm not fucking hurt, you know, because he seems like
a toxic enough old guy. He probably does need surgery. Fine,
but like his whole his like now that you say that,
his energy almost felt like He's like, can you just
please say maybe you need surgery because it's such a
hard cut to them him just like walking on. He's like,
it turns out I didn't like the later my favorite.

(30:17):
It was just him in the chair and be like,
I didn't get how did he fall in the shower
and bust ribs like the physicality of that is wild
to me. I think it had something to do with
his lovely bread, if you know what I mean. Oh okay,
well mary Anne wasn't there, so how would that make sense?
It's just a video call, okay, okay, I pad up

(30:40):
in the shower. Not a good idea, not good, not good.
Damn things are loader proof is a full pirate now,
I know so much so that when Myles does the offrecial,
he closes one eye. Sometimes there's certain voices that I
do I need to close that eye to get it out.

(31:02):
Well it works, that's my tell. When his real voice,
he's closing one eye. Well. Francesco shows up next. She
says she takes her job too seriously, and she says,
you must think like a guest and everything must be
perfect and meticulously placed. Uh and apparently she's been working
on yachts for the last five years in the med Now,

(31:24):
my question to y'all is will she be better, just
based on first impressions than Hannah or Kate? Better in
what way? Just like a Chief stew Is she going
to bring more to the TV? Oh? Yeah you think so? Yeah.
I don't think she's there because she's the best Chief
stew I think she's hold on, wait, she's been doing

(31:48):
it five minutes, five years, five minutes. Whenever stew Is
pulled up being like, oh, yeah, I've been on this
set for four and a half years, you know what
I mean. So it's like, well, you know, like my
Chief Stewis, you should we have at least a decade
in you know what I mean? Uh? So, I don't
know it Also just I was more just consumed by
the fact that so many of the Chiefs twos are

(32:09):
like Aussies or Kiwis or South African And that's what
I thought. I thought they were trying to bring in
a new Hannah for this this uh series. But when
are you gonna be able to see yourself on this show?
What do you mean? This is the least diverse show
on television, hands down. Oh absolutely. I mean I remember

(32:30):
what was the how many seasons ago there was the
actual like black woman on there was Brianna or Simone,
yes Simone, and I was just like, bro, this is
I was like, I felt so bad for her. I'm like,
this is not this is not the place for Yuma,
and like these people aren't completely unaware of how like
one note, this entire crew and culture is and like

(32:51):
her having to navigate that was awful. I don't know.
I mean when I see myself on this show as
like you know, being part of Johnny Damon's ENTOURAI, oh yeah,
that's you know what I mean, That's what I'm That's
what I'm trying to get into. Because Johnny Damon looks
like he's a fucking nightmare. He looks like a great

(33:11):
guy until about nine PM. He's one of my favorite guests,
I think because he seems pretty down to earth like
and how he acts like other than like the food
needing to be like extra hot for him, Like he
seems fine, like he's not like no, not like I
think he's like morally, but like I don't know if

(33:33):
I could keep up because it looks like then he
reaches this other mode. He has that vibe where it's
like almost where I get scared him, Like dude, you know,
like there's people your party with and like you try
and keep up with, and you're like, I'm gonna die
because this person, this person is is just on some
other ship. That's how I feel. Like, That's why I'm like,
it's a night Like it would be a nightmare to
like be part of his entourage if you cannot just

(33:55):
drink you know, three points three fits to the head already.
Well I agree with that, and I think I'm the
majority of the guests who come on the show are
like that, And I think it's very dangerous for people
who drink this much to be on boats. Oh yeah,
I'm a surpriser, aren't like awful like leg breaks and
isn't it crazy? I mean Ashton almost lost Ashton or
the other looks like, yeah, almost lost his leg because

(34:19):
that rope got tied around. But yeah, it's surprising, like
just on reality shows in general, how few people die
while filming. They're always dying later. Yeah, we two reality
show deaths this week. Yeah, one a guy from sixty
Days in um who killed it on sixty Days in

(34:41):
I love that show, but he was like one of
the best, you know, any like kind of like fit
in really well. But he's like a former marine. There
are so many marines on that show. But um, yeah, anyway,
he killed himself. And then the chick who got third
place on American Idols, Nicki mciven Brain and You're is
m at forty two. But she was also premier like uh.

(35:04):
She had also been previously on Dr Drew's Celebrity Rehab
in two thousand eight, so I don't know what her story.
She was great. She was like the rock star one
on American Idol. Mhm, al right, well that's a great
r I p R people. Yeah, alright, So we meet
Avery Elizabeth James is he and Shane James is like,

(35:28):
I wouldn't kick France just get adam our bid and
it's like, you're a creep dude who's kicking people out
of bed. Why would you bring her into your bed?
Well you would suck her and then you'd be like
get lost bird. Yeah, I don't share them all. Bit
of a night. Let me call you an ube. Has
that ever happened to you? Guys? No, I don't ever
leave my house. Have ever been kicked out? Yeah? Yeah

(35:49):
all the time? Oh ship, Sorry, yeah, no one wants
to be near me. I'm not even talking like a
romantic and you're like, hey man, can you go? I'm
all right, or like I'll be at the rest, Like,
hey man, you might finishing that outside all right. Sorry,
I used to having guests. I don't know what questions

(36:13):
they're too sad to ask, Hey man, are you a loser? Yeah? Anyway,
back to the show Elizabeth. Yeah, she has four and
a half years of experience on yachts, um doing yoga
or whatever. Okay, now Avery. Avery is interesting to me
because I don't even know if we just spent any

(36:34):
time on Avery. Because the backbone of this debt crew.
He's the one guy who Eddie's going to be able
to turn to to make sure all the parking goes good, right,
because it's either like the English fuck Machine or surfer
Stone Kebab who's like not even gonna be fucking around
Like it's yeah, I feel bad that guy is not

(36:56):
even good at his own interests. There's no way he's
going to be good at this. Yeah, Like the preview
of Shane like just jumping into like the ocean all awkwardly.
He's you're not even good at being like a fucking hand. Yeah, yeah, no,
this is Eddie is fucked because guess what Avery leaves.
But anyway, we learned that he loves yachting and he

(37:17):
can't imagine doing anything else. And he says he's been
on his own since he was sixteen, and he's from
a very dark place because he left school and he
wasn't speaking to his family and he found yachting and
yachting saved his life. I think he's the new Kyle
if he had stayed. Remember Kyle, the one who was
like a street performer. He was like British, He had

(37:38):
the trans fiance dot com. Yeah, yes, you keep giving
his email out to everyone. His email was on his
CV that they showed, So I say, Kyle on him.
Nick is constantly telling people his email. Well, but he
reminds me of like a Kyle figure. Dark past, but

(38:00):
great personality, nice guy. Yeah, good heart gets arrested for
robbing a club. Later on, he got he got he
got arrested for robbing eight k from a club or something.
I don't know. And then yeah, the whole, the whole,
the whole season. He's like, Um, it's all about how

(38:20):
in love he is with his girlfriend, and then he
like proposes to her at the end, and then right
afterwards like he leaves her whatever. Then maybe he's just
in it for the you know, for the airtime. You
know you hate to see those ones. Yeah, well I
was like on Shark Tank that happen. I don't know
if you watched Shark Tank a lot. But every time

(38:41):
a product comes in and they're like, we want a
million dollars for one percent of our company, and they're like,
you're not here for a deal, you're here for exposure.
Go funk yourself, Get the funk out of here. But
I like this. You can put a kickstand on anything. Yes,
here is my million dollars. So you and you call
it the horse cock. Yeah wait, hold on, this is
these are just pictures of your penis, sir. Alrightmail dot com. Alright, Yeah,

(39:13):
so we learned that Izzy has been around boats her
whole life, but she was too cheap to pay for
a holiday, so she started working on boats. I guess
that's a way around it. Shane is just dilly dallying
around and lost on the boat and he's like, I'm
pretty new to yawning, but I went do you see Berkeley?
And I've been out of college for a year and
everyone was getting these jobs at Google and Apple and

(39:34):
I was like boats, um, and then yeah, and then
he's like, I've never been on a yacht like this before,
And I'm like, how do they get these jobs? Like
how do you get a job like this? You just
show up? It seems like it no one has ever
done anything. Most seasons there's at least a crew member
and at least one stew that has never right or

(39:58):
you like, how do I were this into a cup?
They're like, what have you never poured a drink before? Like,
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hold the champagne bottle
vertically when I was pouring. Yeah. Well, he lets Eddie
know right away that he's green, and Eddie's like being
pretty amazing. Eddie's being decently chill about it. But I'm like,
Eddie is so funny. Eddie's fucked. Eddie's fucked. Was Avery

(40:22):
the one that was cosy? Like, yeah, I was seconds.
I was second deckhand on a hundred And they're like,
oh you, oh wow, Okay, so this guy knows what's up. Yeah,
I think it was. And then Eddie was like being
all like, oh yeah, you know what you're doing. And
then it's like he leaves and Eddie's like, no, your grandma, man,
you're sucking leaving me in the trenches here, ye asshole,

(40:45):
tell your grandma to take me with her. Hey, man,
you might as well just take me with you too. Man.
At this point, it's a grandma. Oh wow, some real
lieutenant governor of Texas there. It's like, maybe she needed
to die and keep the economy going. What's the someone
who hasn't had a grandparent in over two decades? I yeah, okay,

(41:11):
it's been a while. Yeah, well anyway, Francesca. Francesca says
she likes to be her chief stew. Balance is to
be a mom and a hard ass. But Elizabeth says
that she's used to working with militant chief stews who
are mean, but she believes in being aligned and she
really feels energies and vibes and she's like, I think

(41:32):
Francesca has pure intentions And I'm like, oh, she's going
to slap you across the face, okay, like you have
you never seen this show. Due Home girl is asking
to be scammed like with that kind of talk, Like
that's the kind of thing where you're like, oh, you're
a mark, like going to get branded with branded with

(41:52):
your own stage. You're branded with your own stage. She's
taking the vow good. I mean she yeah, her and
Rachel will kill it together being robbed across this world. Yeah,
I just I Elizabeth has I don't know, there's something,
but she reminds me of like the kinds some like

(42:13):
women I would date, like right after college, where you
think like you're like you also have the universe figured out,
and then like you meet somethings like yeah, it's just
like I really feel your intentions and your vibes. I'm like, yeah, yeah,
yeah for sure, Like I love this too a mom
about the universe mom. And then they're like, oh you
have anger problems. It seems like you really see me.

(42:35):
I love being seen. Thank you. That's oh yeah, well,
I don't know if um, yeah he really robbed, would
have like he had like the vibes of like a
ghost of a Viking. Well that's okay. Someone tweeted at
us that on Reddit. They called him a Civil War
ghost yeah, dude, he whatever it is, he has a

(42:59):
strong guess ghost vibes like not even like her ghost,
you like of an apparition, a specter. He's got this
thing where he's like, I have left my human form,
so what even matters? Anyway? It's Nick. Hey, Rob, how
have you been Nick? I have a joke for you.
Oh incredible, I've been missing your joke. Why did the

(43:23):
tomato plush? Why because it saw the salad dressing. Okay, Rob,
we've heard that one. Have your Yeah, I've blown it. Rob.
You're Rob. You're bleeding from your nose terribly right now.
It's because Jess hit me. Rob's the only person who

(43:46):
could date Jess, because you know she's going to burn
your house down, uh and try to kill you. But
since he's a literal ghost like you could just she's
getting the bum into that deal. I'll tell you that.
Then that's already dead. Rob, get the funk out of here.
This is not your season. Yeah, I get some new jokes. Sorry,

(44:07):
I'll leave until if rehired to do the crossing, he
might be keptain. He just vanished into a puff of
vape smoke. Well that's Rob. Yeah, it's CBD. Alright, so
good excited, we'll get that off this boat a CBD. Alright,
so um is he says she hasn't banged anyone for

(44:29):
a while, so she's basically humping the beds while making
that she was throwing it back. Yeah, is he is? He?
Come on? Now? Is you is? Or is you ain't
going to throw it back in front of me like that?
Like somebody knows how to get screen time. Well, she
wasn't too worried when the bidet squirted her on the face.
She was like, yes, queen, Well it was that thing
where she wasn't sure how to play it for camera

(44:51):
almost and she was like, oh, I just took a
mouthful of bidet water too, Like do I start dry
heaving or do I kind of be gets nothing? Yeah? Yeah,
just like takes out her of toothbrush. Is just startspreshing
your cake. It's clean water, all right, don't give me

(45:12):
this ship. No you're not. They're not shooting your asshole
with dirty water. Yeah, well, you just help the nozzles clean. Well,
there's no clean nozzles anywhere. That's a really nihilist again,
take a good look filthy. So that's why you gotta
drink it no matter what do you sink right now?
Pull out the screen and tell me what in every

(45:33):
three weeks? Shut up, I take it out all the
time because I put them in my bowl with disgusting
all right. So James says yachting isn't a career for him.
He's just he had a flat, make money and party
and I'm like, I like that. Yeah. Shane says he
has a girlfriend, which is boring. So whatever, I don't

(45:53):
trust myself, man, stupid. What do you like a predator?
What does that even mean? Bro? I just you don't
understand how much how much I get thrown at me. Bro,
it's wild, dude, like that life call me Jorge Passada
the way I'm just catching balls left and right, dude,
just coming at me like crazy. There's no way he

(46:14):
has a girlfriend. That wasn't a sorority, that was hers fraternity.
What did you say from the nineties? From the nineties,
he said he's getting thrown at him And I made
a stupid MLB reference to the nineties, to the glory
days of the Jenkies. We don't play sports hair seven rings. Bro.

(46:34):
The chef arrives. She had all her ships stolen when
she was at the airport and yeah her louis vaton No.
But yeah, she's been a chef for fourteen years and
um yeah she seems good at her job and a
goddamn fool the rest of her life. Yeah, like it's
I know, it's it's a it's like a pilot episode,

(46:55):
you know, so we can't get into all the characters.
I just I want I want more of this chef,
like chef's dude, they make a break. This season nothing
was like those episodes with Mila. Yeah, I just god,
I love a crazy chef, and we fucking got one.
It's pure chaos because Mila was like pure confidence, like

(47:15):
a confidence woman, a con artist, you know, just came
through like oh yeah I got this, Oh yeah, no problem.
Cut to like trash coming out, and you're like, what
the fuck you had the gall to even put this
ship out, like honestly, yeah, absolute, Like that's that's the
fucking confidence. Yeah. I said on my CV I was

(47:36):
an artist. And she's like putin will not accept you
in your gay boy behaviors and you're like, oh yeah,
oh I forgot about that was showing her like ultra
conservative as were like this is all bad, like Siberian,
homophobic mountain woman, like get the fun out of here?

(47:58):
Y Well, anyway, Oftenly comes back to the boat and
he says, no hugs. His ribs are killing him. It
only hurts when he moves and breeds, but other than
that he's fine. But he feels like he's been wrapped
in a bedsheet and beaten with a ball bat. Suck
it up, Suck it up, cream puff. Okay, boy, do
we know what month? This is? February? Far oh, February. Okay,

(48:21):
so it's in the middle. This is se what I'm
dealing with. Miles, and I listening, I'm saying I know,
I've I've heard, and so I you know, once we
transition Nick off this show, I think we'll actually have
the podcast we've been Wait a second, guys, sorry, I'm
recording a different podcast in another room. Well, anyway, they
have a staff meeting. My favorite part of the first

(48:44):
episode we have. They have the staff meeting and we
meet the boat ghosts. Yea, sir, here, everybody drink. We
have engineers Mario and Zach and first officer John. God
where where where do they hide? I don't know, man,
But I don't even hear their wedsteps, They put them

(49:05):
away in a room that they refused to acknowledge, and
then they only come out when an alarm goes. Those
are the people who are actually working. We call them
the boat ghosts because like are they Yeah, and they
show up and be like, oh my god. This whole
time he's like, I gonna do some paperwork for this
for this CBD pair, They're like, hold on, let me

(49:28):
get out the binder CBD. Let me look that up.
It's like, what's this binder? It's a list of ikey
drugs that you can't bring on a boat. Yeah. So yeah.
In the staff meeting, we hear the classic don't embarrass me,
no male intimidation, respect only whatever. Wouldn't it be funny
if the boat goes this season? We're more were like

(49:52):
completely green. We don't. I don't know that goes wrong. Yes,
No one's going to even teach us how do stuff
because we're not allowed to be at camera. Yeah I
don't know. Oh no, Like I was renting jet skis
out on the beach and then this producer asked if
I wanted to what comes yacht? I don't know. Yeah,
I was just pulling straws out of turtles noses, and

(50:16):
I was just cutting turtles open and taking the plastic
out of them and then throwing them back on the water. Yeah.
I was complaining at the airport check in about the
baggage fees. So the completely unrelated thing. And a producer
I went to be work as a boat ghost and
I said, sure, I was just stealing this lady's purse
or Louis And I was just trying the keys in

(50:38):
every lock until I figured out, like, we're always sweating
in front of Rachel. What's the deal man? Oh no,
do you guys? It's like weird. You never want to
talk to her, like is there something going on? No? No, no, no,
not at all. Yeah. So Captain Lee gives Francesco the
rundown and he's basically like, don't bother me or talk
to me ever, like that's captain style of captain. He's

(51:01):
just like, I don't have a want to babysit. If
I see your face, you're fired. Well, remember, Captain Sandy
is just like, come to me about everything. I'll help
micromanage everything. Captain Lee, hey man, don't even acknowledge him
as the captain. Leave him the funk alone. Just bring
him his goddamn cereal and his coffee and his mug.
That says Captain Lee on it that that Mary Anne

(51:24):
made at her pottery barn, or at her pottery her
color re mind class pottery barn. She has a barn
and back where she does pottery. But anyway, yeah, Captain
Lee's style of running a boat is to not acknowledge
anything until he gets called out about it at the reunion,

(51:46):
and then he'll be like, oh, weird, I wasn't aware
that a bunch of men bullying all the women, really,
and then he's like, if you could excare his may
and then he leaves when he gets a question to hard,
I don't need this crap. It's like, okay, typical fucking
toxic dude behavior. It's like, oh, really can't handle it
when you're being confronted with your own ship. Yeah, but anyway,

(52:09):
he says, Francesca has got some big shoes to fill.
It took a long time to get to the level
of trust where me and Kate were at. Also, you
didn't fire in my crease and my pants correct. It's like, dude,
please stop, which is you know you have to the
way he dresses of the crease going all the way
up to his couchie hole. What is that? Is that

(52:31):
a look? I don't know? Fu fu pleats and ship. Also,
like my legs are too big most of the time,
Like with slacks, I wear that the pleats vanish around
mid ship because my leg is, you know, testing the
strength of the fabrics very high up my leg. So
I don't like pleats usually be a thing. People wild
be like, oh, you iron your pants are and I'm like, no, man,

(52:53):
these pants. I don't have time to get bigger pants tailored,
so I will fit in these ones, and my legs
are blown the pleats out. I'm sorry. Can we move on?
Is a wedding that would? I don't know if I did,
but you know, I guess I'll wear that honor probably
if that's the case. Yeah, I'm from the knee down. Yeah,
you might want to get like just bigger pants if

(53:14):
you want the crease to But then I'm like Michael,
like I might were a boot cut, you know, or
like I've I've worn something where it looks like that.
But it's just that my legs, you know, I'm just
got them thick thighs. So I rocked it. I rocked
the pleat, you know, like fleet from the shin down. God,
I don't. I just can't picture your thick ass thighs.

(53:35):
A lot of people can't pickture a lot of things.
Most people are used to seeing me from the neck up.
Will you send me a link, I'll drop the horse thighs. Horse,
we got horse thies. Okay, yeah, so franch Okay, this
is weird to me because Francesca says that she used

(53:56):
to work in a vent. For a second, does that
mean you have a big butt the tiniest but Miles
has a little like what did you call it? But
like I like, I have like a mom but I
carry a lot of my weight in my legs. Actually,
well that means you're strong, good center of gravity. Yeah, yeah,

(54:19):
yeah exactly. Lyra and I we we refer to one
reality show as big Butt. That's the name of it,
and that's what we call it whenever we see it's
like back with big butts back? Which one is that?
And it's uh the profit Oh, Marcus Lamonis, he has
the biggest but in reality television because it's not you know,

(54:41):
it's like you know, you're not expecting it if you
just see it. He doesn't have big butt vibes. But
then if you look at his butt, you're like, what
the fun And he mentions it sometimes, but he usually
it's like when an actress gets pregnant on a sitcom
but her character is not pregnant. They have to like
hide it behind stuff, right, So he's always like behind
the table, you know. Yeah, Like there's always like a

(55:03):
long buffet behind him, like sandwich. Wait, I need to
see his butt. Oh check it out. Yeah, maybe I'll
drop it in the check drop in the chr. But
Marcus Mona's horse ass well, okay, so I'm curious. So

(55:23):
Francesca says she worked in event management with high profile
magazines in Sydney, but then like, why did she leave that?
What sounds like promising job to be like a glorified
made I don't want to travel the world, you know,
when you're yachting it up. I don't know, like I've
that's interesting that even I've never even tried to enter
the mind of someone who's on this show, because typically

(55:44):
it's either like they're actually Yahdi's and it's cool that
they could also be on TV, or their people just
want to be on TV. That's a valid point. Let's
take a quick break, will come back and finish this
episode out, and we're back. So have our first charter
meeting with Captain Lee, Francesca, Eddie, and Rachel. And then

(56:04):
classic very intense guest Charlie Walters is coming on board.
And he was the gay guy who was into Bruno
and season four for sure. On his itunary requests, it's
got one of my favorite lines, um and it says
Charlie would love to see dolphins. Yeah, alright, so I

(56:31):
have oh wait, wait real quick. He was also the
guy that Josiah was scared of, remember, because he had
all this like trauma from like being bullied by other
gay men by the tough gays. Yeah, by by Jim
Gays or whatever, Jim Gays. Oh like they go to
the gym. I thought you meant like Jim. Oh yeah.
Well anyway, it turns out they all has got a

(56:51):
big giant butt too, right right, all right, give us
their likes and dislikes. Alright, So I just have the
front page from Charlie and the itinerary request. But Charlie
Alters l a California. Charlie is a successful pr consultant
in sports and entertainment. He has been working hard planning
an event in Tokyo for the upcoming Olympic Games. What
is important and he failed? And he hopes to use

(57:17):
this vacation as a fun way to get inspiration from
his friends and the crew to put towards his plans. Okay,
it's gonna steal his friend's ideas. Joining Charlie and his
boyfriend Katos Carlos, who is I can't I can't read
it very well. I'm taking a picture of the TV y'all,
who is sales and marketing rep for a fitness company.

(57:39):
Also joining our Starveronica who knows a great friend and
fitness instructor, Jamie, who runs a notable commercial production company
and is helping Charlie produce content for the event in Dukyo.
We get it. Jerry, a business investor, uh, some guy
something who works in production finance, and Lexie who has

(57:59):
been working in something I can't read anymore. But then
the itinerary requests we got. You know, Charlie wants to
see the dolphins. They must have a reliable life jacket
as somebody's not a good swimmer and actually wants a
jet ski and snorkel. I don't know, it doesn't matter. Well, yeah,

(58:21):
so they want keto and vegan, they want an international
themed dinner on the first night and the Neon Carnival
theme party. Are words that bring chefs to their knees.
Usual usually not unless you're fucking mouths like Rachel is.
Apparently Rachel when she'sn't doing yachting. She's a private chef.

(58:41):
I your vedic practitioner in Monaco and she studied in
India for three months. Now, what's an ir vedic practitioner?
I believe it's Vedic? Okay, well what is that? It's
like a like a holistic healing thing I your to like,
I don't know, like people. It's like a its own

(59:02):
form of holistic medicine. I believe that she she like
cures or helps heal people through food. Sure. Fuck yeah.
In Sanskrit it means the science of life. Oh yeah,
so yeah, it says professionals of additional training and pathology
and disease management. Beyond that of whatever these professionals diet
and more. It's everything using diet in lifestyle to help

(59:24):
promote healthcare and help have you guys looked at Charlie's Instagram. No,
oh my god, give it to Olympic Chaz. He has,
he says, founder of gold Meats Golden dot com. I
went to the website dead link. It's not a real website.
Olympics and enthusiasts and joyalist. He misspells his journalist Olympic Chaz.

(59:48):
This is all he talks about. Yeah, I'm like, bro,
you know, I mean, I guess there'll be an Olympics
because people are losing. Yeah, he's a journalist. If you're
going to read that as the French you are ared list,
that's hilarious. A lot of followers, Oh yeah, I mean
he's he's always partying, joined or less. That's what the fuck?

(01:00:11):
Um Okay, yeah, let's dud. It's basic. Basic. He just
like he loves face paint. How many do you have
a picture with Simone Biles because Charlie does. I know,
he's just he's just like an Olympic I have a
picture with Simone from below deck. He's like a gold

(01:00:32):
medal ho you know, he just like once He's like
if you got a gold medal, Charlie's they're looking to
flick it up with you. One time. Yeah, I guess
he just does all the marketing for Olympia. Yeah, because
he's like kicking with Michael Phelps and ship whatever. I
don't know. I'm giving way too much energy to Charlie.
So I'm always curious to know what the guests are

(01:00:53):
really about, because like being on a show like this
is like another form of like patting your ego or
like your image in a certain and almost like what
the fund is really going on with you? Like, who
are you actually? Well? Here is with beach volleyball players? Wow? Okay,
oh yeah, this show is like it's like a commercial.
These people are doing for themselves a lot of the time,
and half the time, like they don't even end up

(01:01:14):
like looking good. On the other side, you're like, oh
my god, I think you've lost Almost never they wear
shirts with their brands on them, and then you know
which brand to avoid. It's perfect. The only guy I've
ever liked is the termite guy, the tur white guy.
All right, guys, it's the next day. It's a storybook. Yeah.
So Rachel's the female Eddie and she's showing everyone her

(01:01:37):
camel toe camel at a camel cow. She's like fifty
I could kick just from a far glaring at her
like that's my bit, I'm the only one with caramel
yes and l cheerleaders is my bit. Eddie hates her?

(01:02:02):
Oh I did learn in the after show that Eddie
and do you guys remember Parker from sailing? Eddie and
Parker grew up together. Now if that doesn't explain everything
you need to know about Eddie and Parker? Whoa okay,
um where wherever? You know? And that like talk about

(01:02:22):
how privileged he was, that camp farm thing, that the
cult that he grew up and remember like he was
like my parents ran a summer camp and that's what
I grew up doing, being a summer camp cancelor all
the time. And I'm like, you were in a cult.
I feel like I'm forgiving me. I don't learn the
people's names until the third episode. Usually who's um the
Flighty kid? The crew doesn't doesn't know anything. Shane. I

(01:02:46):
wouldn't be surprised if he grew up there. Oh yeah,
oh for sure, for sure. He looks like he just
grew up like on a like a little yacht in
like Marin m He probably did stool yeah, like go
to like Saucelito, like, I don't know, it's like world more,
that's what I'm about. Well, yeah, yeah, these are some
so cow references that are too deep. A yeah, that's

(01:03:09):
like up there, that's for that's for l Anna Hosnie
either yeah, no, he definitely Yeah. So Shane apparently he's like,
I'm a big morning guy. Embody is temple and I
like to wake up and meditate and really set the
flow state for the day and have my pressed that
I don't even know what he says. But Captain Lee's
like watching him do yoga on the deck and he's like,

(01:03:29):
he's fucking kids my back. You should try some yoga
might feel a lot better. So first red flag about Izzy.
She takes thirty two minutes to bring Captain Lee his breakfast,
which is just pouring cereal in a bowl. You want
to do it right? Though, No, it wasn't. Didn't They clarify, like,

(01:03:51):
wasn't she like, isn't his breakfast something? It's like it's this,
it's it wasn't. He was like yogurt or something, and
like it involved some manner of chopping. No, it was
like cheerios. He likes like wheat cheerios or something. It
seems like the bowl that was presented to him. Look,
I had like a bunch of cut up watermelon ryans
or something. You know. I got a question, what's wheat cheerios?
I don't know. Remember she's like cheerios and then someone

(01:04:12):
else's like wheat cheerios or something. That's how he stays healthy.
There's no wheat cheerios. I don't know what they say.
They're all wheat, aren't there. Yeah, I think it's just
that's just cheerio. It's cheerios, or it's honey nut cheerios.
You know, if there are crunch are an insane number
of cheerios, apple cinnamon cheerios, cheerio. You weren't gonna go further.

(01:04:37):
I don't know them. Well anyway, Captain Lee, well he
got his breakfast whatever, and he's like, I'm so happy
I can have a Boston who knows what he's doing
because I had to deal with Nico and Channel or
Nate sucked in Ashton, which a woman manipulator. Dash. Why
I'm so happy I have Eddie back. M hm. Well, anyway,

(01:04:59):
it's not we it's oats whatever, cheerios. Oh my god,
this guy. You don't get healthy by just adding to
your cereal. Cereal is packed with sugar. Mm hmm. All right.
We got um cheerios and honey. We got cheerios toasted coconut.

(01:05:20):
We got banana nut cheerios, dude, or the coconut with banana.
I feel like it would be a real tropical treat.
What you gotta do is get different boxes. Yeah, make
your own concoctions, man. Yeah, anyway, you're you're a giftuned
to cheerio talk. We got chocolate cheerios, We got peut

(01:05:42):
butter chocolate cheerios. We got very berry cheerios. We got
peach cheerios. The things over time, right, these aren't I
don't think those are on the shelves right now, are they? No?
But I think last time I looked at cheerios, there
were like six or seven different cheeros. Love to see it.
They're rocking it alright, Alright, sorry guys. So Elizabeth says

(01:06:04):
that she this she wants us to be the first
charter where she doesn't fall in love with somebody, which
is clear she's going to fall in love with like
James or something, and he's gonna like put in her butt. Yeah,
So the guests arrive and with one look, you already
know that they're going to be incredibly high maintenance because
they're already like hitting on James. Is he more red flags?
She's taking ten hours to make an espresso shot, which

(01:06:26):
I'm pretty sure you just put the little thing in
there and you press make. Who's a group? I literally
wrote in my notes, how do I know more what
to do than this bitch? Like maybe it's because you
are in charge of an office. Well that I'm not

(01:06:46):
in charge of an office. I'm more is I think
it's because I've watched every single one of these episodes
in the span of like eight months, so I understand
what the job is for the most part. Like that
you can make an espresso martini right now, just like
you within two seconds. I just know that, Like you
put the little pod in the thing, like everything's automated.
Now they do that on purpose to make everything quicker

(01:07:09):
because your job is so hard. But she's like, oh,
come on, come on, just work man, Oh come on,
I better get the other one going to just like okay, well, anyway,
the guests are company. Nobody said anything. You just said
to put it in the press the button. It's just
coming out. It's more powder. It's just like fuck it,

(01:07:31):
all right? Is he just just bust them open and
mix them with water yourself, like emptying the little espresso?
Oh no, the machine put a hole in mind espresso?
Get another one? Well out of espresso pots. They're taking
so long that the guests are starting to complain, and
Charlie basically comes up and it offers to help Iszy

(01:07:51):
make drinks, and of course Francesca is not happy, and
it's like, is he all you do is just radio
people and be like, hey guys, get someone who get
the sun screen? All right, I'm making drinks. Charlie, I
really insist that you do not help. But you know what,
is he She's slower than Molesses anyway. Is He says
she regrets working as a stew now, and she doesn't

(01:08:11):
want to work with all these extra guests and her
extra chief stew and it's like, yeah, bitch, this is
the job, like you. That's the whole idea, is like
terrible human beings come on and you have to wait
on them hand and foot. I like that. It was
first day. She's like, okay, now I regret I know, well, Anyway,
Elizabeth seems good at her job. But we'll see Rachel's

(01:08:34):
a big old nerd apparently, and she's like cooking is
like a pezza he and then she leaves her spatchel
out and gets stolen and uh, but the guests seem
to like her food. Shane rolls through with a bunch
of paper straws and he gets rid of all the
plastic ones because he's an environmentalist, and he says he
rolls everywhere with paper straws in his bag because that's it.

(01:08:57):
But also he drives a hummer and he rolls. This
is not going to fly. Nobody wants paper straws. We
all know plastic. The big problem with plastic is not
through straws. There was just a picture of a turtle
once and that's what happened the straws. And we all

(01:09:19):
know Starbucks spend more plastic on their tops, their straws tops,
than they did when they had straws. There was more
plastic in the world. This is not the angle. And
you cannot go on a millions dollar yacht and start
throwing around paper straws. Is gonna get stabbed. Higher up,
start at the stop, at the industry level, not at

(01:09:41):
the consumer level. Papers are not very physically they don't
stay after a while. The best type of straws that
I've used other than plastic are the bamboo straws are
actually good. I actually liked those more too, because it
feels like I'm in like Swiss Family Robinson or some
ship where you're like, oh ship, I'm using bamboo as
a straw and then you kind of chew on it
at the end. Yeah, but I still use Twizzlers. Ah,

(01:10:04):
you legend every day flow. Yeah, I'm like on a hike,
I got my water bottle. God, it melted in the bottle.
I guess it's really hot up anyway. The guests are
on jet skis, and of course every time they're like,

(01:10:28):
oh no, all these drunk people are using the jet
skis high speed watercraft under the influence, and then every deckhead, deckhead,
every deck hands like stressed out the whole time, and
it's like, this is what it is. You're letting drunk
people use motorized vehicles in the water, Like what did
you think was going to happen? And the funniest thing

(01:10:50):
is when they're trying to get the I don't know
what they're trying to do do. They're trying to get the
jet ski back to the boat, and Eddie falls in
the water and then like helping him up and he's like,
get off, I may that's Eddie. That's Eddie in a nutshell.
He's all good vibes until he looks like a fool
and then he's piste and he's like dignities out the

(01:11:11):
window and he leaves for five years. Yeah, well, you
know he spent years just being like the second I
get on that boat, I'm gonna look so fucking cool
when I get back on there, I'm not gonna make
any mistakes, right, And then episode one, just like that
other girl, this was a mistake. Yeah. Well, the thing
is he actually kind of made himself fall in the water,

(01:11:33):
like he didn't have to like grab onto the boat
and try and hold on, Like he could have just
stayed on the jet ski and tried to come back in,
but instead he just decides to like fall in the
water and then get upset when someone tries to help
him in. Eddie's gonna keep an eye on Eddie this season,
all right. Last thing that happens is um Avery learns

(01:11:55):
his grandma's not doing well, and he decides he has
to leave, and he tells Captain Lee and cath and
he's like, I understand, what makes sense because he's a
doctor and he's the only one who can cure her. Right.
So anyway, Avery is the only good deckhand and Eddie
is low key tripping, which I think is funny. I'm like, yeah,
fuck you, Eddie, and then Avery bounces and he's like
I feel bad, but like I have to go, and

(01:12:17):
then he leaves and Captain Lee is like, oh my god.
Then he's like fuck and that's where the episode ends. Uh.
Good times. Yeah, it's time for boat facts with Nikki Tase.

(01:12:40):
You have eight minutes and then we have to hop off.
So eight minutes. What if I needed eight minutes for
a boat fact. I've done a boat fact in five
seconds before the word this. Uh. This is from double
r Underscore from Apple podcast reviews. Get it we have
boat fact. So there's a bunch of praise. I'll skip it.

(01:13:03):
It's mostly for me, okay, and she says, uh, I
have a boat fact about a very cool kind of
boat I just learned about. House Boats are not usually
works of art so much as utilitarian pontoons, which I've
never seen this level of shade thrown on a houseboat.
This person is coming for houseboats. Fuck. But in the

(01:13:27):
Kerala region of India, the Ketavallum style houseboats drift through
the waters with ornate thatched roofing, beckoning tourists aboard. The
design dates back to three thousand BC and was originally
used to transport spices and passengers along trade picks. Look
up a pick for the full effect. Okay, there's a

(01:13:53):
there's the wiki. There's the pickies in there. The pickies
on the wiki. Oh those are beautiful. So anyway, yeah, houseboat.
I didn't I don't think of houseboats as like actually
functioning as boats like go places. Especially you see like
those documentaries of like nice houseboats. You're like, bro one
wave and you're fucked, Like it's just going to topple over.

(01:14:14):
And I just got my brand new TV A damn it.
That's a very nice houseboat. I like that. So it's like,
I don't know, it's a bigger houseboat. The the etymology
kett who means to tie and valent means boat, So
the two together, uh, you know, it's like tying boats together.
I mean it doesn't look like there's multiple boats tided together,

(01:14:35):
but they're just it's just a larger a larger structure. Um,
but they're nicer. They're so nice and they're very ordinate,
and that's like what it is. It's like it's like
taking something shitty and making a gorgeous like when guys
really pimp out their bicycles. You know, it's like, I know,
you're just riding around town on a bicycle. It's got

(01:14:56):
a lot of gold on it. You probably could have
afforded a car. Oh no, these a gold handlebars fourteen
grand mama, Like what the fuck? I live on them?
Looks like gold chain link anyway, check check them out.
There about a hundred feet in length, or as they
would say on below deck a thirty three boat there

(01:15:16):
uh thirteen feet in the middle, and the materials that
go into making them are bamboo poles, coconut fiber ropes,
bamboo mats, carpets, carpet and uh yeah, I don't know,
it's really crazy. It kind of looks it's kind of
like the vibe of like like an ant farm. M

(01:15:38):
I like that there's there's two story ones like you
could really like upper deck like that's nice. Yeah, some
of the like the interiors, they look like super nice. Well,
thanks so much, Nick. That was a great boat fact
for our first weekly show. Really shout out to the
reviewer who left that. Hey, guys, you can also leave
a five star review with a boat fact that would

(01:15:59):
be amazed sink. Oh all right, myles, thanks so much
for joining us for inaugural weekly episode. Please tell tell
the listeners where they can find you and follow you,
and you'll just check out the Daily Zeitgeist if you
don't and if you're If you don't done, don't or
check out four twenty Day Fiance. If you watch niney
day Fiance, it's me Sofia alexandro is getting high talking

(01:16:20):
about ninty day Fiance. Uh and then Twitter and Instagram
and miles of gray there it is hell. Yeah, you
joy to talk to. Thank you so much. It's always
a pleasure to talk to you all. Yes, thank you.
H Yeah. You can leave us a five star review.
You can leave four twenty Day Fiance a five star
of you. You can leave a boat fact for them,
You can leave a boat fact for us, and you

(01:16:41):
can follow us a deckheads pot on Instagram and Twitter
and email us an leave Miles boat facts on the
Sports twenty Fiance Apple podcast. Yeah, take the ward to
take the reward of the reviews, and please please send
those boat facts over if you do receive them, Nick
really needs them. Uh yeah. Follow. You can email us
at Deckheads podosymail dot com. I'm at anna host need

(01:17:02):
Nick is at Nick's turners. We got merch on t
public baby Master of Beaux Fax T shirt. You could
have it, you could have it all all right, we're
out of here. Miles, please step onto the motor boat
please and I'm on all right, and we're out of here. Bye.

(01:17:27):
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