Season 8, Episode 13 with Johnny Pemberton

Anna and Nick are joined by Johnny Pemberton to talk season 8, episode 13 of Below Deck.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Deckheads, a production of IR Radio. Welcome to
Deckheads with your hosts Nick can Anna, broadcasting from the
bottom of the boat below below deck. Whoa horny all
ya talk all the time. I'm having a party. We're

(00:21):
shoveling cold to keep this show afloat. I love cocaine.
We're off the map in international waters. I need some drama.
Me hide that cocaine. Never in my nose. Just see
you know. I'm in an open relationship below deck wo

(00:44):
me Deckheads? Hi, Nick, how are you you? Hey? Anna?
What's going on? Sorry about last week? But I was
in jail okay, so I wasn't gonna tell anyone, but
I was arrested or exposing myself um at a Walmart. No,
my my mask was off, and I tried to explain

(01:07):
to them I'm immune because I had it. I showed
him some articles from Science Today and he did not
buy it. I went to jail, where I was given
a mask made from human skin. Nice. This is dark.
So we are here to talk about below deck season eight,
episode thirteen, and I guess nixt very very surreal week

(01:31):
last week, um, when which he wore a human surreal
It's a normal week for me. You know this, I
just got caught this time. Yeah, that's right. Well, we
are joined by a great guest who we didn't know
was a deckhead until I think literally last week when
they they two thousand elevens New Faces of Comedy. Yes, yes,

(01:53):
at the Montreal Comedy Festival known as Just for Laughs. Yes, yeah,
the son of Zorn himself. We got him. Everybody wanted him,
They said, does this guy watch below deck I said,
there's no fucking chance. He's too cool. But okay, guess
what it is cool to watch? Well? Yeah, well, I

(02:16):
mean you might know him from his show live to
tape or from his streaming platform, his own he made
this platform, uh, Twitch dot tv, slash just my Nipples.
We are joined by Johnny Pemberton. Hi, Hi, thanks for
joining us on this um true boat ride. Did you

(02:38):
guys turn on the cabins? Uh? Oh no, okay, why
are you asking me? She's just you don't have you
should be a self starter. Just go ahead and do it. Well,
we live just so annoyed with Elizabeth. I'm sorry in
one of the guest cabins, like I didn't. You're not
supposed to be in the guest cabin. You know, we're
not allowed to leave the built. Look, I'm getting restless.

(03:03):
We live in below the below the bottom of the deck,
in the guest cabin. Did you sleep in the guest cabin, Johnny? Yeah?
So what That's what I'm begging her to say this
whole episode I did. Guess what. There's a week left,
you dumb bitch. What I am waiting? Did you see

(03:31):
the first season of OZ the build up to this,
like to him? You know, um murdering the Nazi at
the end or a spoiler. Let's Francesca and Elizabeth, right,
they're gonna kill each other? Got bad? Well, I think
Elizabeth needs to step up and just take her in

(03:52):
the worst way because this is getting to a point
where it is just inappropriate, how annoying, like just inappropriate
to my well being, how annoying Francesca has gotten over Elizabeth.
I have a theory, what is it? I think that
Francesca can't say it, but she's jealous that that Elizabeth
has uh sexual relationship on the boat because she because

(04:15):
Francesca wants to have a little bit of a pleasure.
Mommy needs some pleasure and she's not getting it. And
she's she's jealous of Francesca, so she's ratcheted up counter
she sucked way before Elizabeth was getting it in. She did,
but it's become worse since then. I'm more petty, more petty.

(04:39):
I was hoping that Rob would like make her come
and that it would get better, but Rob was too
busy being like, I am sorry, I've never spoken aloud
outside of Gold. Why does her Francesca just like fucking like, hey, hey,
come to my cabin tonight. Just tell Rob to come
over and get it done because she wants like stick

(05:00):
mulating conversation, which she's not going to get from like
a Gold boy. She just she's on TV and she
doesn't want anyone to think she's not a good girl,
so she's not going to be sexually aggressive. But I
think that Francesca, I think what gets her off sexually
is being rude to Elizabeth. And I think that Elizabeth

(05:23):
no one on earth would put up with how Francesca speaks.
No one, not a single person on the boat. I
can't think of anyone in the history of Belood. So
you think Francesca is like uh told on Chis and Ross,
she's like Elizabeth. You dumb bitch, do your job, and
then she runs into her bathroom and like Jill's off

(05:44):
real quick. Yes, she plays it off like she's sick,
and she's like, oh, I'm so shake Can you take
the cabbins? Need to be done? If you're not done?
Oh my good, that's my agent, that's my age. Sorry
all right. So we ask our all our new guests
three questions at the top of each episode, and the

(06:06):
first one is how long have you been watching Below Deck?
Like what was the first? And the second is how
did you get so sexy? But we'll start. I started.
I was trying to get sexy, and I was like,
what's the show that's Surrey sexy? It takes us on
a boat a lot of water at the rich people,
beautiful people, and I started watching Blow Deck. I probably
started watching it how I don't know how long has

(06:28):
been around two years, three years, it's been on ten years?
No one hasn't Are you serious? This season eight? It
started filming, um, I think and started airing A two
or I don't know when I started watching it, but
I definitely have watched many many seasons of it. I've
watched I know Captain Sandy, I know the I've watched

(06:50):
Blow Deck sailing. I know amentimate with all the things
that Kate as does as a chief stew and offer
personal things she's gone through. I know everybody there is
to know when they show that, when they showed the
whole Bravo, like all the people watching from past seasons,
I know each and every one of them. Okay, and
by the first name, what has been your favorite season

(07:13):
that you've ever seen? You know what I gotta say, Ship,
This is tough because I feel like these past maybe
four episodes of this season have been some of the
best Blow Deck I've ever watched. Huh, because the stuff
with Rachel to me, like Rachel is such such an
insane character that I feel like they've never had someone

(07:34):
go like you saw Captain Lee's face. He was like,
you're saying this stuff. She's a fucking She's like the
true loose cannon and they never had such a loose
cannon before. She's never true had any consequences. I bet
she has on the show. Yeah, she's a nightmare every

(07:55):
day and no one ever says, hey, Nick, she's a
damn good though. Okay, I good chef. I think he
let her rip some farts all over the galley. I
don't care. Ripping farts is the least other worries you know. Actually,
I remember I loved Ben a lot all the season

(08:15):
with Ben is a chef, just his voice. I was
a big fan of his voice and the way he
would get drunk. Do your bend impression, Nick Um, oh, behay,
I can't do it right now. I can't. He has
a very specific acts like Austin Powers kind of vibe
to him. You just can't put. I can't do it

(08:36):
right now because he has a weird way he Johnny Um,
I have an idea for a show I wanted to
run by you right now. Yeah. So it's a spinoff
of Below Deck Got It, and it's called Oops All Chefs.
Everybody on the show is a chef and they gotta
do everything. They gotta serve if they gotta run the boat,
do the slide, but they have to delegate between them

(08:59):
and they're all all the head of department. It would
be like Lord of the Flies. The boat would burn
down to the water line on the third day, no problem, guaranteed.
The funk. What would happened is is that the primary
would take over as the Captain sure, they'd have to
to save their own lives. Yeah, I would like to
offer a counterpoint that at one point, I believe season

(09:20):
four a regular below deck, we had a chef Matt, who,
if you guys were calling Nick, got a cameo for
me for my birthday from but he sad caesar salad
guy with cheddar. He put cheddar cheese on everything, which
just annoyed the ship out of me. Up, his specialty
was a chicken caesar salad that was specialty, and he

(09:43):
served it to everybody who came on board. Oh my god,
you know what this is? Actually before I started watching,
Oh wow, Well, he when he needed too, was able
to come on deck and like help out the deck hands,
like he knew better than and that season notoriously had
bad deck hands, like they just couldn't get anyone good,
like everyone was green. And he at one point just

(10:03):
walked out and like very simply did something that Captain
Lee needed that the deck hands couldn't do. And then
she's like went back to cooking, and it's like, okay,
So some of these chefs know what's up. They've been
on boats long enough to know how to like handle
their ships. So you never know. Oops, all chefs might
be actually well run motor yacht. Okay, can't wait. I
can't wait for the conversation between chefs when they when

(10:24):
they tell when they try to figure out who does
what job. Gosh, someone's got to be pure murder. Yeah, pure.
I think Rachel would. I don't know, like Rachel would
do a good job because she's I think she has
a probably a genius level. I Q. I think she
might be the captain. Yeah, she's like cue, she's probably cute. Actually, god, well, Okay,

(10:50):
our final question before we start recapping this episode is
who has been your all time favorite cast member on
this show. I mean, it's just so I hate having
to say this, but I really feel like, just because
I can't believe how fucking insane Rachel is, I feel
like she has she's pulled forward right now. She's currently
in the lead from my favorite cast member just because

(11:13):
of her absolute fucking nightmarish insanity. Yeah. No, she's gone places,
No one's gone. Yeah, she's I didn't think you could
do that. I just thought like you couldn't like to
tell Captain Lee to funk off is just so it
was incredible watching that I felt like I was I
was holding my breath and to eat her couonter. Yeah,
she has no I watched on the After show last night.

(11:34):
She has zero qualms about anything going on on the show.
She does not give a ship about her behavior. She
just goes like, well that's me. You're like, okay, I'm
very wealthy. Now, yeah, she's a buddha or she has
some uh, she obviously has some type of personality disorder.

(11:54):
Oh well, when they were like, do you feel bad
that you went on that stage and like took over
and tried to sing, She's like, no, everyone loves karaoke.
It's like, okay, well that was clearly not everyone loves dirty.
The greatest sign of all is people who say they
don't have hangovers. That is the instant anytime someone says that,
you know, like, oh, I think it's because she just

(12:19):
doesn't stop drinking. That and also because she is a
bipolar alcoholic probably is what it is, so she doesn't
really feel emotions like people. Interesting. Well, that's my theory
at least. I think it's just a just a strong,
just strong personality, a strong woman who's just incredibly confident

(12:43):
um and potentially the type of person who um would
kill you and think about it. All right, let's get
into has anyone seen her boyfriend lately, Vincenzo, Little Vincenzo,
her little man that she always emphasizes how small he is. Necessarily, No,
he's not been heard of nowhere on her Instagram either,

(13:05):
So geez, No, Moss. He went swimming down the down
the street in Venice and never returned bye bye. I'm
sure he's fine, but I do that. I can't imagine
that they broke up because she loved alright, I go by, hello.

(13:26):
I don't think he's I don't think they've broken up
because based on how she speaks about him, like she
seems like she fucking loves him. I think he's going
to destroy him, the way that Adele destroyed her husband, Simon.
I don't know anything about that. Adele the singer. What
do you remember what you're talking about? No, I don't

(13:47):
remember it at all. He was like at the Grammys
for her two big albums ago they had well, I'm
telling you they had this big, They had this you know,
WorldWind Romance. They were the talk of the down and
she quit music famously to focus on her relationship with
this man, and then you know, two years later she

(14:09):
comes back with another hit album and she's skinny and
he's gone. Oh, I didn't even know those things. Well,
shout out to a Dell funk men. Okay, no offense,
you guys. Uh So, Season A, I'm not a man.
I'm not a man. You're a little boy. Here you
all right? Season A, Episode thirteen. Uh. We continue with
James telling Rob in front of Elizabeth how he follows

(14:29):
a bunch of birds on Instagram, and that's why you
go on Instagram, baby, to follow chicks. Okay, birds birds,
big big birds, little birds. Wants to flip around once
it can fly. His last girlfriend was a big bud ostrich.
Oh and she cheated on him, and now he has

(14:51):
intimacy issues? Would you, Johnny, what I was an Ostrich?
What I know I would not have effects with an Ostrich.
Is that because you're in a relationship or it's because
of there's not a world where I would have sex
When I let an ostarch have sex with me, yes,
but I would not have sex. I would Oh they
could bury their heads. Ye, go ahead, Barry. Well, we

(15:16):
learned that the reason James is trying to hurt Elizabeth's
feelings is because he has no emotional intelligence and because
he's upset at her for not sticking up with him
when Rachel was like actively talking ship in front of
his face, just being like, this guy sucks, Elizabeth. He
fucking sucks. Okay, look at his fucking face. He's trash.

(15:37):
And James and Elizabeth, Elizabeth is, she's got problems. You
don't know what you mean. He's so great, Like Elizabeth
should have just kicked the chair off under Rachel and
everyone want have laughed and then like, oh my god,
this woman is was wasted. She had it coming. That
would actually said. She pulls her aside, like let's talk
about this, let's talk about this. She's think your energy

(15:59):
is all over the place, and I just want to
make sure that like you get that, like me and
James are having a relationship. I would love to see
her responding to trolls on Twitter. Oh my god, just
trying to see where you're coming from. No, shut Elizabeth,
Please don't go on Twitter, don't go on social media.
Don't read the comments. Now I get there. They're contractually

(16:20):
obligated to hang out with her at dinner, right, that's
the only reason they didn't leave the table. The producers
are like, you're not getting your Rachel bonus. Maybe bus Okay,
this was okay. My my least favorite times of the
show is when Ashe and Francesca are talking about how
they're just so alike. They're just so alike. They don't

(16:44):
believe in rest. They want to die working. Oh my god,
so alike. I love that your boss, you have your
force to bond with your boss over how much you
want to work for her. Yeah, with my first in Australia,
we just love working. It's so great running from something

(17:05):
from home. Clearly I'm tough, fucking handled. I just stopped
eating or the rest. It's the only thing you can
do is risk to stop eating. They have done both.
What are you talking about. That's not how you get better.
Stop eating, honey, have a soup. Yeah, you starve a
cold and feet of fever. Yeah, that's crazy. Actually, I

(17:26):
think it's the most boring person who's ever been on
the show. Well, she's also like a snake. That's the
worst part, this snake. It's like sen snake so much.
But I guess if I think about it now, maybe
she is. She's always like she's being a dick to
Elizabeth behind her back, and then also just like reporting
back to Francesco about everything. Ah, you guys, we call

(17:49):
that a snitch. Yes, she's definitely an I was saying
my least favorite character ever on Belowjack, here we go,
it's Malia. Oh fuck genuine narc and her obsession with
maritime law. Go fuck yourself. Okay, no, what cares? Yeah, Malia,
I used to comment on Instagram all the time. I've

(18:12):
stopped doing that stance. I say, teacher, and you forgot
to give us homework. That's hilarious. She never responded, of
course not. I don't even know. I wouldn't even notice
if she did, probably, but sorry, I had to bring
that up. I think is um, she's kind of doing

(18:32):
the best that she can in the circumstances. Imagine if
the only two people you saw all day were Elizabeth
and Francesca, and then you had to just ride in
between that you the least of my worries would be
being a snitch at that point. I'm just trying to
stay alive. Yeah, but she definitely lean leans heavily towards

(18:53):
Francesca's side, like she hates every time. Why would Elizabeth power,
except that of crystals in she's just dumb, but she's
like so nice. And crystals in her tips. Yeah, she
keeps us she keeps crystals in her bra. Yeah, that's right,
she does. I forgot about that. To keep the energy.

(19:13):
The third nipple they call it. That's good. That's good.
That's merch for her, that idea over let's marriage. Oh, merchandise. Okay,
jameson got you can you know? He also had never
heard of a cannoli? What I give him? Okay, on

(19:36):
that because he's English. They don't know shit about anything
like that in England. Yeah, okay, they're like they're relegated
to like a separate ward. That's true. Well, okay, So
the doctor shows up to see Elizabeth and Rachel and
ashe won't see the doctor because that's I don't know,
because she's arout back. Yeah, and Elizabeth gets weird when

(19:57):
the doctor asks if she's having sex, which I was like, bro,
you're an adult, just say yes. And then she asks
if you ties. She was just very proud of it. No,
she was like, yeah, I guess you could say I'm active,
and then the doctor and then she asked the doctor
if you ties are contagious, which is what do you

(20:18):
what do you even? I don't even are they on
the boat did get it? I've never had one. No, one, Jesus,
every no, every there was multiple t It was just
Izzy and uh is he and Elizabeth got U T
E S. I'll tell you. Elizabeth got a U T

(20:41):
I because she fucked James and then didn't go Peah
and had kidney. Yeah, she had a double kidney infection
which probably led to her U T I. So no,
I don't think. I don't think Izzy rubbed her couch
on Elizabeth's coach and gave her a U T I's

(21:01):
not going to stop me thinking about it. Well, anyway,
the doctor is a real sport about She's like, no, no,
of course not, of course, it's not you fucking did
you make it? Shows unique because it's the only horny
guy perspective of a Brad Brabo show that exists, only one.
There's none other. Man is he though best character? Oh?

(21:25):
Is He's the best. He's like the only person a
few people ever on the history of the show that
I've seen who's like sort of a decent, normal person
who doesn't like flip out about dumb shit and does
flip out about the right things. What a weird person
to have to have cast to cast like someone who's
incredibly stable and like has like an interesting background. Yeah,

(21:49):
it's like at one point paralyzed but then found her
way back and then it's just like Francesco's a count
and you're like yeah. And also like doesn't talk about
it all the time, like she mentions it never. She's
never like, oh I have a problem because of my
Epstein bar. Oh my Epstein bar, Oh my Apstein bar.
Never heard it once. Never, and everyone else like you know,
Elizabeth would just spend the whole season being like, my

(22:13):
boss is so mean. But she like the first episode
she's like, my boss sucks. I want to go work
on the deck crew. Yes, she's like a real out.
She is what you could just go do it? And
then she left and then she did that so well
that she gotta in the season. Bravo was like, God,

(22:33):
damn this, this is not a good hire unless it's
like they like that because it makes everyone else seems
so much more crazy, because is he's just like, do
you know so well adjusted? Yeah? I think she's going
to come back as a boson sometimes I hope so,
I I hope so well. Yeah, so the doctor thinks

(22:53):
Rachel has gastro enteritis, which is like, yeah, because all
she does is drink, she's fucking killing herself. I didn't
think about that. That's true. That's probably a big uh
component to that. Yeah, it's probably not doing what'd you
say and then just scoop butter into her mouth. Yeah,

(23:15):
be a different expensive proteins. Yeah, well, she needs therapy
to get hydrated. And it's like, yeah, bitch, I could
have told you that you're not you don't get hungover
and then everything all the talks and stay in your
body and then you're slowly have like bubble cuts or
whatever she called it. Two bags too? I would, I would,
Oh my god. You know, people talk about what you

(23:36):
do with a ton of ton of money. IVY therapy
once a week would be the ultimate. Imagine how hydrated
every week you just get hooked up while you watch
a football game or something. What about a blood bag
like Peter Thield just you know, carry one around. Well,
that that would be my next step. That's my next
step in two thousand twenty three, I'll be having a
blood bag. You would have great skin. Probably call it's

(24:00):
blood bag. That's that's from mad Max. I think this
like Nicholas Holt is a blood bag. He's just a
guy that there's like slaves that they carry around they
take their blood. Yeah, I forgot about that. Um, Rachel
says all her ship is liquid, which I'm like, cool,
thank you, Rachel, thank you. I was not curious. It

(24:23):
might just be p honestly, Yeah, I mean she's like
my dog, let's take a quick break. We'll be right
back after this and we're back. Sorry I said the
dog thing because my dog has been having really bad diarrhea. Yeah,
did you switch the food? Yep, there you go. That's

(24:46):
all it is. Right. Yeah, it's been a situation, but
you know what, he's getting better. So it takes about
two weeks. Yeah, just a little poopy boy. Okay, So
remember that like weird texting guests that's like into a
we learned that like ashes like kind of into him
as well and getting all like flustered talking to him,
and I'm like, who is this guy? I told my wife,

(25:10):
I was like, he looks kind of like a walking phoenix,
in which case I got punched in the arm because
it's like, you know, because the guy looks like walking
phoenix if he just got hit by a truck. Yeah,
it's kind of like the shirtless guy, the doughe who
consists on drinking Crown on the rocks all the time. Yeah,

(25:30):
and like a college student rents. Did you see that
people had truly's yeah it might have been. Yeah, that's
so sad. I can imagine having that much money and
having that bad taste and you're not even having a
white claw. It's the worst version of it. Everything about

(25:51):
it's sad. There's been like there's been like maybe one
or two charter guests ever that have actually been proper
wealthy people who act like it and they also have
the taste of you know what I mean. It's always
like this weird thing of like this weird mix of
like rednecks with money or like just like the trashest
people ever money. It's like aggressive new money who are like, yeah,

(26:16):
well it was like last the last charter was like
the people at the beginning they just wanted to drink
champagne the whole time, and it's like that's just champ
you just want champagne. Champagne's fun to cheers with but
it's not like an all day, everyday drink, not as
you live in the region of France where it's made.
Yeah shamba, Yeah, like come on, yeah, you got to

(26:38):
drink it straight from the ground, from the root. You
basically have to go harvest the root, break it open
and like squeeze out the champagne. If if you've got grapes,
it's too late, that's how you've gotten too far. You've
sucked up the juice, the root juice, and that's where

(26:59):
champagne or originally um comes from. You'll see there's little bubbles,
do it. Chim haag chim pag. Yeah. Well, okay, Rob
thus okay, this the thing is like Rob who's kind
of a weirdo is but it's like truly one of
the most interesting people who's ever been on this show.
Everything about him, he's like, I hunt for gold, I

(27:20):
live in the forest. My brother zipped me up in
a suitcase and left me in a park. Has zero games. Yeah,
I can't speak to women, no idea where he is,
doesn't know how to dance, very confused all the time.
Loves yeah, loves James to a point of kind of
a weird connection where you're like, okay, dude, we get it.
But that is also like I had a dog named

(27:42):
Kaya Rocky Filofel McClary face. Yeah, okay, dude. I feel
that he was teed up to make that comment about
is he's promotion just so he has some sort of
spark at all. You know, that's kind of right in
a way, like it doesn't really mean that much at all. Yeah. Yeah,
they just put some music behind it made it seem

(28:04):
a certain way. Yeah. Rob has no nuance in his speaking,
so you know, he can say anything. It would sound
like with the right bad music, it sounds like he's
either being triumphant or fucking dastardly. I do want to
say Rob said that one thing when he was talking
about him and Francesco first started flirting. He said, Francesco's
giving off some really steamy vibes. And that's the most

(28:27):
like anything that's ever come out of his voice. He's
the cringe. He's the pitome of cringe. I feel bad.
I would. I just want like something to happen to
him so he can have some game at all. Will
be so nice. I don't know if anything will, but
he will go back to his sailboat searching for gold
or whatever he does. And I don't know if he'll

(28:47):
ever be on this show again. I don't think so
it doesn't bring enough to the table except for he'll
never be on any show again until it's the local
news because he's been revealed as the blue eyed killer.
Oh my god, I can blue eyes. I don't know.
That would be pretty interesting if he did, right, that
would be like, wow, he's got blue eyes. Yeah, water, yeah, Okay.

(29:11):
I don't know what James plan here is because I
don't get like what James humor is. But he's basically
being weird and making jokes about Ash covering for Elizabeth
in their hookups because she isn't feeling well and does
with Elizabeth. That's what he's doing it. He's funking Elizabeth
and a Ash is so dense. She doesn't understand what's
going on. Ash can do is go like smile. I

(29:36):
don't get it. And Elizabeth's like truly being like torn
up by it, and she says, I don't play games. Okay,
I don't play games. I don't play games because I
don't understand the rules. Right. But like the weirdest part
is she actually goes up to Ash and it's like, um,
I just like, can you guys just tell me if
you're like flirting, if there's something going on? And Ash

(29:58):
is like, what what do you mean? Yeah? Like no,
I was just like, yeah, Elizabeth, he's clearly fucking with you.
Do you think they're going to hook up though, because
they kind of teas that a bit, didn't they. I
pray at night before I go to bed, I sit
down and I pray to God that they hook up,

(30:19):
that Ash Leane and Rock and James hook up. Yeah,
just for the just for the drama. Yeah, I think
it would be incredible because you know, eventually Elizabeth has
to break. If we go through this whole season and
Elizabeth doesn't break, it's all it's all from, not like
break like start crying. Yeah, No, she has to have

(30:41):
a meltdown and go ape shit on everybody. She's gotta
tell Rachel off, she's gotta tell Francesca off, she's gonna
tell Ash thing off, she gotta tell James off. And
I think that's all she has to tell off. But
I'm you know, if you get a little Captain Leean there,
I wouldn't be mad. Captain Lee would probably love it
at this point, but yeah, sure it off gold chains on.

(31:02):
I didn't think that was something someone would say. I've
never heard that before my damage seventy five years. I've
never heard someone say, take a slide and blow it
up inside your hands. He's here in a lot of
first this season, didn't. I feel like they were kind

(31:22):
of teasing that James and Elizabeth, we're gonna get fired
for sleeping in the guest room. Though, yeah, that's it's
too late. They won't fire them. They just want to
make it, make it a hubbub, right and make it
like a to do that. It happened. All I had
to say it was yeah, yeah we did. Sorry, Yeah,
it won't happen again. Yeah, they got that, Like it's like, uh,

(31:44):
there's footage of of Elizabeth carrying a bag somewhere, but
they could just be switching rooms, like actually, we think
it's better if you and James share a room. Even
when James, even when um Eddie talked to Francesco, he
was like, oh unless you as from Redhanded, nothing you
can do remember that. Yeah, and he doesn't care. I

(32:06):
just wish Elizabeth ask me, ask me, did you sleep
in a guest room last night? Did you and James
sleep in the guest room? Um, do you have any
proof of this? Okay, asked me if I slept in
the guest room. Have you slept in a guest room?
What sleep? Have I slept in a guest room? Yes? No? Oh?

(32:29):
Dare you okay? Have you slept in the guest room,
Francesca God, get on my face? Yeah? Oh ship all right?
Asking me ask me that's that's good. Have you slept
in again? Did you sleep in the guest room last night? No?
But I know for a fact that you did last night,
and that is the only reason you've come down here
to accuse me. I've talked to every single person on

(32:50):
this boat, the people who charted the boat, all the
way up to the captain, and everyone says you slept
in there. Oh my god, frances sleep. I'm sorry, Francesca, Um,
you can take your Okay. Yeah, I'm sorry, Elizabeth, Elizabeth,
I'm sorry, Lisabeth, I'm I'm oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Elizabeth.

(33:11):
I'm sorry about that. I heard from Ash landed he'd
stepped in the end. Didn't know if it's true. Even
though we've got these fans running about twenty four hours
and died as loud as hell. If you don't get
out of my face, I'm gonna start throwing tip rocks
at you with a force. I want to hear Elizabeth
start talking like, yeah, you get the funk out of
here because I came up. My daddy's a big fucking

(33:33):
guy in Jesse. He works in the waste management. So
you need to don't talk to me like that. If
I want to suck James, I suck James. Okay, what
the fun you want them all about it? If if
you hadn't just told me you've been watching as a friends,
I would have guessed it. Yeah, her dad does seem
intense though. Her dad, he's just a New York lawyer
and he's just looks so buff, and you're like, oh boy, James,

(33:59):
you want you can? Are you? Um? I also like
to show always says that she had a great childhood,
nothing wrong, and really, mhm great. Yes, my whole family
was at the Capitol on January six. But I had
a good a good child that had a good childhood.
It was good, had a good time. Yeah. So Elizabeth
finally confronts James about the joking with Ash and he

(34:20):
says he flirts with everyone, nothing has changed. It just
a joke. Elizabeth's not convinced, but she keeps going back
and forth if James deserves another chance. But then I
guess she decides he does and gives him a cannoli
That gets her in trouble with asshole Francesco. Of course, God,
that scene right there, that scene was probably the most

(34:42):
I've ever hated Francesca. She like pops down, like leaning
on the stairs. It's like, just fucking get bent. Yeah,
She's like, what are you guys doing? They're like which
just she like stopped talking. Stop. James pops up though
it seems like they're so guilty, shoots up straight. I've

(35:03):
never seen anything happened so quickly. You were seeing like
dogs get caught like doing like bad stuff to look
on their face. It's just that one every day. Yeah
you do okay, yeah, my dog, my dog is so
good now she doesn't do bad stuff. What the fuck? No,
I was just pretending, Okay, my dog doesn't do bad stuff. Now, Okay,

(35:23):
my dog has diarrhea. My dog actually never used to
even Anna's dogs bad. My dog is diarrhea, doesn't mean hey, whoa, whoa,
whoa Diarrhya don't mean bad. No one is a bigger
apologist for Anna's dog. Annis dog is incredible, thank you.
It's just gay. His stomach is sensitive. I'm Elizabeth's dad.
His stomach is sensitive. He's got it. You't organic, otherwise

(35:47):
he's gonna die. Yes, she was at the Capitol. But
he's got a yout organic in prison. Otherwise he will die.
Great child he he got organics, a great childhood. Those
tattoos made of organic in it was a sword that
goes into his dick. She's got to be from Long Island, right, Elizabeth.

(36:08):
It seems like I don't really know that stuff, though,
I don't know about the East Coast. If that's a
that's in Turner question, Nick, I don't know. She's probably
from York. You know, it's fucking disgusting people like you
always think everyone with an accent is from a cool place,
or like a desirable location where there's the high rents

(36:30):
and big houses and great careers. But a lot of
times they're just from York. Yeah, it does feel like
maybe Elizabeth kind of hides her New York accent a little,
but sometimes it comes out here. Maybe yonkers yonkers. Well,
Eddie talks to Captain Lee about promoting easy to lead
deckhand because, in Captain Lee's words, she's no cream puff.

(36:56):
Yah yah, she's no cream puff. Like what does that mean? Stuff?
It's just like, hey, hard on the outside, soft on
the inside. No, no good for lead deck handing. The
man is so so bereaved that he like can't do
anything he used to normally. Do you know what I mean?
The guys like got such a bug up his ass

(37:19):
understandably right, Yeah, he used to wear shirts way more. Yeah,
but now watch the point. Look, these are my nipples.
I do want to say that. On the after show,
when they asked him about Dolores jumping off the boat
and then the tender, he was like, wow, she's got
her all. She's got p f ds. I saw that,

(37:42):
and Andy Khan was shook. He was like, whoa, whoa,
whoa whoa. And if you don't know what p f
d s mean, it's personal, which he was referring to
her tits being big. He said that about my balls.
So I'm he is, after all a sea captain. He

(38:04):
is quite literally a sea captain. But I was always
gives me about the show is when you hold these
people to a standard that traditionally is like, these are
the worst people in the world. For hundreds of years,
the people you would describe with having low morals and
low characters are sailors. I mean it's like it's like

(38:27):
a euphemism. Yeah, drunk like a sailor, curses like a sailor,
like all that stuff, grizzled as a sea captain, and
all these people. Technically they are just sailors. Yeah, and
they all live in Florida, which is like another aspect
of that, Like, I don't know about you, um anyway,
So yeah, is he the non cream puff is promoted

(38:49):
to lead deck hand, and then a few quick hits,
Rachel says she shipped her pants in traffic ones because
of course, of course, Rachel, I would expect nothing less
done that, you know, the New York equivalent on the subway.
I never have. Well, you were very famously not from
the East coast. Yeah, but I've also been and I've

(39:10):
lived here for a long time. I've been in traffic. Yeah. Well,
traffic is different because you can get out of your
car and you can't where you gonna go, where you're
gonna go, to the bathroom just in a bush. M
well bush, this is this is the desert, this is
the semi arid. You know what, if you need to
go bad enough, any business or private home is a

(39:32):
potential bathroom. Let's drive at home. But not in New
York though. You can't do that in New York City. No, no,
you can't do that New York City. And you can
only do it here if you have a blue checkmark.
I find it easier to go to the bathroom New
York City than is California, because you can go to
any restaurant in New York and just walk in and
go to the bathroom. I mean, I think that they

(39:52):
are equally problematic, but yes, it depends fully on who
you are as right you need something. At one time
I got an argument with my brother and his fiancee
because we stopped at the side of the road in
this place in Minnesota called some sort of like Burger house.
There's a place people snowmobile to basically, and I was like,

(40:16):
I need to use the bathroom, Like they're not gonna
let you. I'm like, yes, they I'm not gonna ask
to use the bathroom. I'm just gonna walk in go
to the bathroom. They're like, they're not gonna let you.
They're not gonna let you. I'm like, watch, I'll bet
you a thousand dollars. I go in the bathroom. Money.
I walked in, just looked around, walked to the bathroom,
used it, and walked out. That's the kind of that's

(40:39):
all you need to do. I um always in New
York was just put headphones in. Yeah, and then people
can yell at you and you know I didn't hear you,
and there's no one's going to shove the pea back
in you exactly, and the cops aren't coming. Yeah, call
the cops. Captain Lee, Captain Lee, call the cops. She
jumped off the boat. That's maritime law. Another interesting thing

(41:03):
that happened that was coronavirus related was Eddie was holding
a bottle of sanitizer and said, I'm gonna start selling these.
These are about to He's about to fly off the shelves. Well,
he didn't know how unlikable that move was. Yeah, so
this is something about that. The coronavirus stuff in the
show is so interesting to watch now when they talk
about like, oh there was there's seventy nine cases in
New York, Like, isn't that crazy just to think like

(41:26):
how much? Yeah, and deaths a day. Yeah, we're like
we're still counting in episodes. Are gonna be crazy? Oh yeah,
I think yeah, Well that's Eddie literally says, thank god
we're on the islands. It's like, yeah, you're safe for
five minutes, bro, Like that's he's going to hit the
islands for sure. He did. Yeah, I thought he did

(41:48):
say that. I thank god we're on the island. You
know what? He was actually wrong because it didn't hit
that bad there at all. Oh really, yeah, I don't
have the numbers in front of me. I was looking
at him because I'm like, how do I get the
funk out of this? The worst place in the world
right now? Alright, how do't we get out of the
place where you can't get vaccinated? All right? It is

(42:09):
officially the next day, Johnny, I tell everybody this, just
get the coronavirus. The comfort I have, you know, mentally
is incredible. What about your spouse though, Well, she didn't
get it, and she got five negative tests, last of

(42:30):
which was yesterday. Um, and so uh, I wish she'd
already had it. You're probably both super tasters. Man, I
bet you are look it up. But this is what
I'm saying. It's like, now I've I'm invincible. I see
people having down the streets with no masks. I laugh.
I laugh at them. I take off my mask and

(42:51):
I laugh. The strain is supposed to be a lot wild.
There's just be careful out there, Nick, while they're like,
how like more fun? It's supposed to be stronger. How
can it be stronger though it doesn't make sense evolutionarily
wise for the virus. I don't know, man, that's what
I'm reading. I'm reading it's the next train you need
to double you think we are. No, that wasn't about

(43:13):
the next train. That was just about if Auci was
asked like, would it be better if you double masks?
And he's like, well, you know, I mean just think
about it for two seconds. If one mask works, wouldn't
two masks work better? But I don't think that would
just that had anything to do with like the new
I think he was just like, we should be doing
two masks forever. But I think they did a study

(43:36):
that said that two masks were kind of the equivalent
of an N ninety five. Yeah, oh, I can dig
it all right. Well, uh, it's the next day asked,
says she's still not feeling well. Um, and it's like, yeah,

(43:57):
well you didn't see the doctor when they were there,
so it makes sense that you're still not feeling well.
Was that was that, Rachel? I'm a I've got a
lot of poop coming out of my but I refused
your knowledge. Yeah, that's that's facts. But also she this

(44:18):
was random aside. She's like, I like this Texas guy,
but it will never work because he lives in American
and I live in Australia. And it's like, yeah, bitch,
I wasn't worried about your relationship with this dude that
you may be have spoken to three times on camera.
Ashley is just NonStop the dumbest, most boring thing you
can say. Yeah, well so pretty Johnny. You forgot to

(44:40):
mention that, Yeah, she is well. Um. I always think
it's interesting because Francesca is so hard on Elizabeth but
never acknowledges her own like funk ups, like she's like
fucking up breakfast and Rachel's pissed in her and like
radioing her and Captain Lee can even hear about it,
and he's not happy, and yet it's Elizabeth's fault. Can

(45:02):
I say something very terrible? Okay, have you noticed that
Francesca seemingly is unable to wash her hair? Interesting? Do
you think it's very greasy? It looks just like at
all times it looks like she doesn't She doesn't have
bad hair, right, she has a decent, nice head of hair.

(45:22):
But it seems like at no point in time does
she ever do any type of normal type of hair care.
You see and literally every person who's ever been on
the show, like they brush it maybe or they watch
it because you're got, you're on TV. Sometimes I'm just like,
like you must be. It just looks like she's like

(45:43):
living on the streets or something sometimes, but she's the
chief stew Well. I don't know if you were called
I haven't noticed that. I'm not. I'm not. I guess
I'm not a hair guy. I think I'm a hair guy.
And I just noticed that, and I'm like, how does
she I don't. It seems to be like, you know,
maybe one in five times it looks like she's uh

(46:03):
done something to it, but otherwise it's like it's just
like messy and all everywhere and stuff. It just kind
of ridiculous for someone whose job is supposed to be
the head of the interior hospitality. You know, he's supposed
to look look nice and presentable and clean and sleek
and all that kind of stuff. You know what I
mean called that Kate as Well had like an issue showering.

(46:25):
She never wanted to shower, that's true. But she also
but she didn't have an issue with like putting herself together,
though she always liked looked very presentable. Interesting, I'll have
to keep looking out for that. I haven't noticed it
as much. Wow, this is really like I've hung myself
out to dry here with this. We gotta talk about
it Friday Night Lights. And while we were watching Friday

(46:47):
Night Lights, Lyrah kept talking about Tim Briggan's hair and
how he never washed it and how distracting it was,
because it's like, even though you're like a poor Texas
high school kid on a TV show, you're an actor
on a television show. Everybody else's hair looks incredible. Why
have you not washed your hair for five seasons? Maybe

(47:08):
that's something they chose to do with him as his character,
because if if an actor doesn't want to wash their hair.
You just put fucking dry shampoo in there and fix
it up. Yeah. So um, the guests are having interesting
conversation where they're like, we don't understand why coronavirus is
going to affect people's money. Oh my god. That was
the That was so sad. Yeah. I was like, oh,
you're about to be the people who are like fighting

(47:31):
like businesses being closed down. Oh boy, It's so funny
to watch all these people who were like, I mean,
it's not any different than you and I Like, if
you heard conversations that I had in February March, I
must have sound like an absolute idiot compared to what
we know now. But it's funny to see this. These
people are all white power. This yeah, the power of

(47:53):
bleach to kill germs on contact. Well yeah, and you
know Sklee Francesco as being an asshole to Elizabeth for
asking a question, and she's almost like She's like, I'm
trying to do breakfast service and you're distracting me. It's like, bitch,
you already fucked up breakfast service. Stop making dude. That
was I saw that. I kind of stopped. I felt

(48:16):
like so bad for her because it's like Elizabeth about Elizabeth,
and she's always okay, mission maybe kind of dumb and
kind of diet see airheaded, but she's always very always
very polite and always speaks in a way like okay, sure,
thank you sorry. She's never she's never aggressive or mean
to Francesca at all. But Francesca, it's almost like they

(48:36):
have this weird like relationship where that's like a dominous
sub where it does feel like they're acting in a
scene together and they both learned their lines and everything
separately and they're like, this is how I'm gonna play it.
I like I'm gonna and then they get together and
they both refused to change anything about their performance. Yeah. Well,

(48:58):
the guests are leaving, they were happy with their trip whatever,
Ashes complaining about her stomach, but also refused to see
the doctors. So, in my opinion, stop complaining. You had
your chance to see the doctor. And Rachel shows off
her model walk for Ash and Elizabeth and then reveals
that she was on America's Next Top Model season three,
but Tyra told her she wasn't serious about it. Did

(49:20):
you guys know that going into this or no? Yeah,
I saw it on the after show pretty early. On
that's just Rachel's like some sort of a genius in
some weird way. Yeah. Well, on the after show, she
literally said she just did it because it was something
to do, which to me is like you tried out
for like an elite modeling reality competition show because it

(49:40):
was just something to do. Yeah, she's nuts, man. Yeah.
I mean she obviously like tried to get on this show.
I mean she wants to be on television, sure, but
I feel like this show she's actually like good at
what she's doing. Well, sure, but you know, maybe she's
a great model. I think people it's always funny when
people show their model walk, like there's anyone on earth

(50:02):
who couldn't do it, But I think people can't. I
can't do it. I can't do it. Well, I mean
I've tried. I tried. I was on America's Next Model
That's Tops the first season two six, and I tried
really hard. I just couldn't keep my head. I was
doing a lot of back and forth and I got uh,

(50:23):
I got kicked off four back and forth. They said
I didn't usually fall down when I tried to. I'm
a big, a big follower a fall model. My model crutches.
Why would they want a guy who falls model? I
thought that was a niche, but evidently it's not. I
was berated for it, and I'll never go back. I'm

(50:48):
gonna be a Boston now. I'm sorry to hear that.
Let's take a quick break. We'll be right back after this,
and we're back. So basically, it's tip meeting time and
Captain Captain Lee is happy with everyone. We learned that

(51:08):
they got a seventeen k tip. Apparently not good enough.
I feel like they're where if you got four dollars
you do a backflip? Yeah, but now you want you
know this? This this crew is a little bit greedy,
aren't they? Yeah? And then especially like is he's mad

(51:32):
about it? Is he you got hired for a different job.
You should feel lucky you're still on the boat. Yeah, yeah,
Well can I not do the job you hired me
for and flew me here to do? No? Well, the
thing is just the food was great, the starbus was great.
They had a great time. I think everyone needs to

(51:54):
stop up. If we can do that get to this
last charter, then we're gonna have a good season. And
I want to end on a note. So let's go
clean up the speech. That's right. So he got I
got a plane ticket home. Capitalleens like we're gonna go
adopt a beach day and do a beach clean up,
and everyone's happy except James was like can I drink?
And everyone's like, shut the fuck up, James, James, you're

(52:16):
a big guy. I'm sure you've got a big old
hob down there. But we're going to clean up the speech.
We're a good job, and then you can fuck Elizabeth
go back and have sex in the guest room. No problem,
as long as you ask. Yeah, James do. I don't
have a problem with it. She's okay with him. What
if I got stuck in that boys, you can escape it? Help?

(52:39):
Oh god, I'll be terrible. Help I'm stuck here, Help
me help. I need my breakfast and my little little
mug a cereal with his coffee, my little mug. Thank you. Yeah.
So they head out to this program called Adopt a
Coastline and they pick up a bunch of trash on

(52:59):
a beach and everyone shocked how dirty the beaches and Antigua.
And it's as if like they're not aware of like
associated hitting golf balls unto the ocean. Well, apparently I
looked those up. Those golf balls are biodegradable. That they
Thank god, I'm so glad to hear that, actually, because
I used to hate that. I see them like, what
the fund is wrong? Remember we'd always like talk about
how it was just like hitting a fish in the

(53:20):
head and then just sitting there. When are they biodegradable?
You can just say things they oh no, that years. Also,
how much do those costs to make biodegradable golf balls?
That can't be cheap? I'm sure it's not. Are surprisingly cheap.

(53:43):
I just thought there's like an industry where people go
retrieve them and sell them bag and then. But buying
new golf balls is like involved. That's not true. If
I bought golf balls recently, I got like four for
three dollars. Yeah, if you if you care about if
you're like a you can spend a lot of money
on golf balls. Well, I'm just saying you don't have to.

(54:06):
If the ones you're out into the ocean, you're probably not.
But if you're gonna go, if you're gonna play, play
at the top of your game. Max fly Max fly
Balladas like the core. It costs like twelve bucks a
sleeve of three at least. This is like years ago.
I remember wanting to buy something like when when I
was a child golfer Okay, go on, I just remember

(54:31):
them being incredibly expensive. I was like, what the fund
these costs? How much is are golf balls? Yeah? Also, okay,
I do want to point out that they're like how
could Antiqua have so much trash on it while ignoring
very clear divides within cities, which is like, yes, you
guys hang out in the fancy rich people area, but
there's other parts of cities that exists that are disregarded

(54:53):
because they are like the lower income areas. I just
want to point that out. These people are the worst.
Because Eddie literally goes he gives this whole speech. He's like,
we're out here really destroying our beaches and the coral
reefs and whatnot, and you know what, that could really
destroy the yachting industry. And it's like, bitch, that's not
the point. We don't give a shit about the yachting industry.
It's our planet, the Earth in general, Like what do

(55:16):
you mean, Like God forbid, the yachting industry goes away?
Good speech by Eddie. I think Eddie was uncomfortable making
that speech. He seemed like he was, Uh, can I
Can I be done? Now? Can I be done? Can?
I mean? He isn't even in the yachting industry industry.

(55:38):
He's on a show called Below Decks. That terrible news
for you. Um, a lot of these people are no
longer in the yachting industry. They just are on this
television show, namely The Captain's Oh yeah apparently and Captain
Sandy do no longer are just are boat captains for

(56:01):
a living. They just they have like they're just professional
rich people who have like investments in restaurants and stuff. Yeah,
I don't know that. How do you know that? Tell
me more? Well, I've been doing a show a Bubblo
Deck every day for a year, and OK, I learned
a lot of things it. Yeah. Um, he does appearances

(56:22):
and he's owned twelve restaurants. He doesn't he doesn't currently
own twelve restaurants, but he buys and sells them as
part of some group. I assume he's also a staunch
Donald Trump supporter. No, he's not easy. Yeah, he liked
a tweet that he said he always says he's not political. Yeah,

(56:45):
that was what he said when he was confronted by
liking this tweet about people on a plane to go
to the capitol and it was he was like, now
it wasn't me. Don't even talk about it. I don't
talk about politics. He's like, yeah, but you liked this
tweet and me, but it's a person you follow. It's
this like conservative whatever social media person Florida. He's a

(57:10):
rich person who lives in Florida. I don't know. I
do know a lot of time in Florida. And you're
a Trump supporter. Now he's not the president anymore. Oh no,
are you serious? He's not. Well, I was wondering why
CNN went off the air. He's not the president. So
James text you, gives Elizabeth a you up text at

(57:34):
eleven pm, and then they go hook up in the
guest bedroom and we hear oh yeah, oh yeah. I
do love that aspect. And we get to hear the
sex in these episodes. Finally they're delivering yeah yeah yeah,
and her response always oh yeah, oh yeah. But anyway,
it's the next day. So that's what sex sounds like.

(57:55):
Oh yeah, oh yeah, it sounds like this every time.
Could you imagine were we were all in long time
relationships and could you imagine your partner enjoying it still? Yeah?
I could. That would be what they're like. Imagine right,

(58:15):
imagine this is this is a recording from my bedroom?
Is that right? Yeah? Oh? And that wave that is
natural la the wave no one else. You have a
picture of a giant wave behind you. Well, I can
tell you this. I didn't vote for Trump, but I'm

(58:37):
not happy to see him go. I didn't vote for
him only because I was on Charter at the time.
I think the election was probably stolen, but we don't know.
So we're gonna have to just get through this Charter everyone,
and I have friends who told me that it's stolen.

(58:58):
Let's just get through this, okay, guys, good tip. I
wonder if you ever says stuff like that on Charter.
But also if you saw his Instagram. He posted a
photo from getting vaccinated and he's like, I'm getting vaccinated, guys.
I believe in it, and so does my lovely bride
Mary Anne. Yeah, but Republicans want to get vaccinated just
as much as Democrats do. All the bullshit's done once
they realize just nice to know they need something. Okay,

(59:21):
let me take my victories where I can. Okay, man, Sandy,
I bet Sandy is a big time I heard she is,
and she sometimes I turned on Sandy. I usually like her.
Me too. Same. That's the problem with women in entertainment.
There's less longevity because you people turn on him. I
didn't turn on her, turn on her. I just uh

(59:44):
don't find her. I don't. I just can't suffer her anymore.
You didn't break a bottle and then shove it in
her direction. I didn't send her a voicemail. Yeah, so
Eddie promotes easy to lead decan in front of Rob
and shame she outed Malia. That was when she turned
Oh yes, that was bad. Okay, so is he's dead hand?

(01:00:05):
Officially Rob agrees that she's good at her job, but
he says that she doesn't need a little title, and
he calls it cute, which I'm like, Wow, is this
like the most sass we've ever heard from him? Yeah?
Who knows if it's real or who knows if he
is being controlled by a producer like a puppet. Hard
to stay with him. Sometimes Francesca told him to say
it's cute, which just say it's cute. She doesn't like

(01:00:28):
Iszy because he called her a twat earlier. I said cunt,
But like Ezzy, what do I say? She's got my job,
but I love it and I wanted it. What do
I say to And then she's like, just tell her
she's cute. That's what I would want to hear. God,
He's like, you're cute, and then he gets punched square
in the face by Izzy, who's probably stronger than him.

(01:00:49):
So ash is still complaining about her stomach and Francesca
finally insists she go get a grocie the doctor and
then she comes back and she literally says it's a
food issue. So I got a muscle relaxant for my stomach,
and I'm like, what is that. It's just like, yeah,
I want to know what sort of way the way
that Ashley confused what was said. I'm sure Ashley just
did not understand anything because she's too busy, like watching

(01:01:12):
a bird fly or something. Yeah, but I feel like
there's something that was not too come come across correctly.
It's food stuff. It's like I thought you haven't been eating.
I really hope next episode that it's like this food
thing needs to pay off. It needs to be like more.
They have to have like camp a bach or something terrible.
But I don't think they do do that. I need
to find out that the water has been poisoned or something. Yeah,

(01:01:35):
Elizabeth like put a crystal in it, and I was like,
it was like a poo crystal. Elizabeth puts soap and
bleach and she's like, I thought I didn't know. Oh
that's the smell poistening everybody for three weeks. Oh no,
not I get. She's so like another boat. I killed

(01:01:57):
everyone another boat every time. I hope we hear about something.
I just want something to payoff from the sickness, you know,
it feels like just dragging out. Just bubble guts, baby,
I love. Actually I love when Rachel said bubble guts.
I thought that was really chill way of saying my
stomach herds. But anyway, uh is He makes fun of
James hooking up with Elizabeth and the guest cabin, and

(01:02:19):
that leads to ask snitching on Elizabeth to Francesca Um,
which is like not good because Francesca always needs Ammo
to come after Elizabeth and she's like dying to fire her.
And then Francesca says, sleeping and a kiss kibbin is
not authorized unless okay, by the captain old the chief
stew and it's like, shut up, you loser, who cares?

(01:02:41):
Did you see her smiling? There was one point during
that when she learned about it. I swear to god,
she's fucking smiling. Oh yeah, because she was like interesting,
finally something all can nail this bitch to the wall
with Captilay. Captain Lay snipped in a GISs kibbin. She
just I think we should far into half a new
crew the last three days of charter. So you want

(01:03:05):
me to go online right now? Make about calls? At
this point in season, it's gonna be hard to find
anyone worth disappointing machines and it's not worth it. What
if we fire Rachel and who comes on? Mila? Well,
I don't have what do you want me to do?
Do you want me to serve? I can do it?
His flip burgers. That's it, the grief of the captain. Yeah.

(01:03:29):
So James and Robert being difficult with Izzy because she's
the lead deack hand and that's what women go through, okay, baby,
And you never want to deal with a James or
Rob who's in love with a James. But anyway, it's
the next charter meeting with Captain Lea Francescotti Rachel. We
learned that the Queen of Versailles is coming back a
k Jackie Siegel, and this time she's bringing Yeah, she's

(01:03:51):
bringing her husband, David Siegel, who's a notoriously evil piece
of ship. Yeah. Oh he's uh, he's guy who um
is the dominant force behind time shares in this country. Well,
that's you can share time at a place in the
Bush presidency and so he uh like invented the aggressive

(01:04:17):
tactics have you know, every time you win a you
win a trip somewhere and then you're got to go
sit through a timeshare presentation. All his all his idea.
Where's your time share in Boca? I have one in Bocca,
and I have two in Tampa, and I have one
in that too. I have won a Hilton Head. I

(01:04:38):
just couldn't go to Tampa once a year. I gotta
it's too much to see because people are so popular
now with the Tampa Bay Buccaneersn't Tom Brady then my
parents live in Sarasota, I get it. Yeah, great place,
a lot of lightning. Nick, were you able to get
the likes and dislikes of Jackie and David? Oh, yeah,
for sure. Well they're actually return guests, right, so there

(01:05:01):
was no picture of their likes and dislikes that, but
I do have the cover. Jackie and David Siegel primary
charter guests from Windermere, Florida or Versailles, owner of Westgate Resorts,
this piece of ship and his philanthropist wife. Her philanthropy

(01:05:27):
is donating to a house she'll never live in. Jackie,
also known as the Queen of Versailles, gave herself that name.
Have brought together family and friends for an unforgettable Caribbean vacation, unforgettable.
They do this forty times a year. I guarantee you
they won't remember this two months from now. It's not
even the first time from this show, and it's just um,

(01:05:51):
I guess advertising for her philanthropy office. She's previously chartered
in the med and she and David are dostrange years
to lavish vacations and extraordinary service. Tell me more. Joining
them is David's son, Steven, executive at guests where You'll
never guess Westgate Resorts yes, he got the job. I

(01:06:15):
don't know how, but he got it. And his wife, Janessa,
she's to stay at home mom. Finally someone who's not
lying about what they're up to. Two of David and
Jackie's children are there, twenty year old David Jr. In
nineteen year old Daniel best friend. Blah blah blah. Anyway
they're here, of rich will be a boring episode. I think, well,

(01:06:38):
we'll see, we we we learned. They want hard boiled hallopenio,
pickled quail eggs, which I've never heard of, ribby, and
then like one guy just wants cheese, peach at Pizza
angel here, Basta sliders. He just wants like normal childhood food. God,
I'm so hungry right now. One guy. It's the big
millionaire billionaire piece of ship. Right. Rachel knows. She's like,

(01:07:01):
I know what he wants. He wants baby food. But yeah,
they want to swim with marine life and they want
all the water activities. Mokka uha. Yes, like they're going
to bond over their loss of their children, which should
be interesting. Captain Lee is emotionally unavailable. He's gonna leave
once he starts to cry. Well, that ship's really raw

(01:07:21):
for him. I like don't understand why they keep forcing
him to talk about it on this show, because I
mean they have I I'm surprised they definitely held back
on talking about it because they want you to not
know why he's so surly until later on. You know,
this happened two years ago. I mean they've already they
already produced an entire season after it happened. I didn't

(01:07:44):
know that, well May this is the second entire season
they produced. I thought it was more recent than that,
he says it. He says in the episode that it
was a year ago, so we know that this is
pre coronavirus. Right. So Francesco spyling about Elizabeth and James
sleeping in a guest cabin and she finally confronts Elizabeth

(01:08:04):
about it and basically loses her mind on her and
she can't be professional, and Elizabeth's trying to like not
answer the question, and Francesca says, I've had enough of you,
and it's like, dude, you bring lame is fuck. Elizabeth's
trying to be like, yeah, we fucked, and then I
went to my bed, basically like whatever. We're just trying
to have some privacy, all right, Johnny asked me if
I slept in there? Have you slept? Did you sleep

(01:08:26):
in a guest cabin? Yes? So no, it's simple sleep. Now,
I didn't do a lot of sleeping. Bitch. What did
you do in that? Did you spray everywhere? Yeah? And
guess what did you cut the walls with that special
essence you have? James, spout is spray all over the walls?

(01:08:51):
Why would you do such a thing? I'm chart how Dad?
So I don't know? Elizabeth answered for this, James, James, James, James,
please explain our Stafia. I want to be Can I

(01:09:11):
have an idea? How would you clean up that beach
while acting up your cabin? You don't smell your your
wretched excrements. You've sprayed. I almost had the guest primate cabin.
You're foul o different stinch puffing out your anal glands?
How do I know your Francesca's like, Queen Elizabeth? This
is my Francesca. Hello, I'm I never brushed my hair?

(01:09:36):
How dare I never brushed my hair? Someone do it? Fall? Mhm, Well,
I didn't shampoo my own hair, neither Dreson brush your
hair brush it? Fran She's a piece of work in herself.
The way she reacts of like Elizabeth like, I'm just

(01:09:56):
trying to be professional and talk to you. Elizabeth's like
friend shows because like, yeah, you're not professional at all,
and it's like, bro, you're screaming. You need to chill
the funk out. Uh. That's where the episode ends there.
It was, Yeah, it's time for boat facts with Nikki Tas. Okay, guys,

(01:10:20):
you know we all see these people zip zapping around
the world on these luxurious yachts, and sometimes you see
some more famous yachts, you know, back in the background
and they'll they'll do a special. Everyone will come out
and be like, look it's the ex Caliber or whatever.
But here's my question to you. Okay, how many years

(01:10:41):
does this type of yacht remain operational? Oh? Am, I
supposed to guess right now? Yeah, I guess, uh, twenty
five years. Okay, now what do you say? I would
say fifteen years? Typically? Uh, these boats, Uh, they're designed

(01:11:05):
lives tend to be between five and twenty years um
and then thirty like if the yacht is really well
looked after. But but outside of that, it's not saying
that older yachts don't exist, but there there. You know,
it's like it's like seeing a car from the fifties
on the road. You know that that everything in there

(01:11:26):
has been replaced. Interesting, So that's for yachts. Also, cargo
ships that sail in the ocean can have a lifespan
of twenty to thirty years, and sail boats thirty to
forty years. Okay, that's all right. Thank you for that

(01:11:49):
wonderful boat fact. I didn't know that that was interesting, Johnny.
Thank you so much for doing this show and recapping
season A episode thirteen with us. Where can people find
you and follow you? Well, if you try my name
and the Google search engine, you're gonna have a lot
of results. Okay, you can do the image search. You
can see a lot of pictures of me. There's one
of them I hate, and you'll know which one that
is because it's gonna be one that looks really bad. Otherwise,

(01:12:12):
you know, just to Google that. You can check me
out on Twitch. I'm there a lot, Oh I see
which one? Just my nipples on Twitch, or you can
just stretch my name Johnny Pemberton on Twitch and come
join me. Why ride out the Apocalypse? It looks like
Brendan Walsh made this photo of you, which one? Oh god, well,
I mean, who knows. The more you click it, the

(01:12:33):
more it becomes the photo that people want to see. Okay,
well it's the one I don't Nobody ever uses a
photo of me taking after two ten, so well go
look at that. You can follow us the Deckheads spot
on Instagram and Twitter. Leave us a five star review
if you feel so inclined. I'm at Anna host seeing
Nick is at Nick's Turners, and uh, we'll see you

(01:12:56):
on the next episode. We're all gonna hop on this
little tiny boat and get the hell out of here.
Why Deckheads is a production of I Heart Radio. For
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(01:13:17):
favorite shows.