June 6, 2024 • 47 mins
Andra Day is an American R&B and soul singer, songwriter, and actress. She is the recipient of various accolades, including a Grammy Award, a Children's and Family Emmy Award, and a Golden Globe Award, along with an Academy Award nomination,
In this episode we discuss Andra’s album 'Cassandra' and the theme of love in a multifaceted way, She emphasizes the importance of vulnerability, self-reflection, boundaries, and exploring the connection to God. Andra also shares intimate backstories from her role as Billie Holiday, how It impacted her personal life and the spiritual connection she felt with Billie during the production. We also learn about her favorite song from the album and how it changes during different times of her life. The early inspirations on her voice, artistry, and the theme of abundance in the album.
Connect: @DeviBrown @AndraDayMusic
Learn More: AndraDay.com
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:27):
Take a deep breath in through your nose. Hold it now,
release slowly again, deep in helle hold release, repeating internally
(01:02):
to yourself as you connect to my voice. I am deeply,
deeply well. I I am deeply well. I am deeply
(01:30):
I'm Debbie Brown and this is the Deeply Well Podcast.
Welcome to Deeply Well, a soft place to land on
your journey. A podcast for those that are curious, creative,
and ready to expand in higher consciousness and self care.
(01:53):
I'm Debbie Brown. This is where we heal, this is
where we become. Today we have oh my gosh, extra extra,
extra extra special guest, huge fan. I actually was like
vibing to the album the whole week getting ready. So
we are going to dive into all the things extra
special guest. Grammy Award winning singer, songwriter, activist, and acclaimed
(02:17):
actress Andrew Day has been bearing her heart on the
world stage four years. She was initially best known for
her twenty sixteen Grammy nominated Rise Up, which amassed over
one billion streams and an r IAA triple platinum certification,
and she has performed alongside everyone from Stevie Wonder to
(02:38):
the Obamas to Nick Jonas Alicia Keys. In twenty twenty one,
her feature acting debut in the Lee Daniels directed biopic
The United States Versus Billie Holiday, in which she starred
as Holiday herself, earned a Golden Globe for Best Performance
by an Actress in a Motion Picture Drama and a
nomination for Best Actress at the Oscars. She also won
(03:01):
a Grammy Award for Best Soundtrack Visual Media and BET
Award for Best Actress. Since the film, she hasn't slowed down,
making appearances at the Golden Globes, The View, The Tonight Show,
and The Daily Show, among others. What's more, Andra continues
to support causes close to her heart and has worked
with Give Directly, Public Counsel, and the Biden Harris Administration,
(03:23):
to name a few. Her most recent studio album, Cassandra,
is a soulful and timeless body of work that captures
the artist essence and admitable vocals. Welcome to the show, thank.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
You, Wow, look the whole time? Who wrote that bio?
They may have that stuff up. No, it's actually really cool.
Sometimes you hear it back and you're like, wow, it's
pretty amazing.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
It's pretty amazing. And I mean, like some of the
things that stand out. I mean, God, okay, let me think,
because I have so many ways that I want to
wind through this conversation because I think the thing that
becomes so apparent, especially when you hear that album, but
definitely when you just hear the sound of your voice,
the word is like depth.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Oh wow, thank you, Like depth, like immediate depth.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
And it's like even to see an experience of it's
like your feature debut and you're Oscar nominated and you
go for Globe winning like that is wow.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Thank you, thank you so much. And Emmy Emmy, which
you're not gonna lie to you. I did not know
we had until what was it two years after what
I was talking to somebody about it. I think it
was like in an interview too that I can and
saying you and you got you're close to any guys,
Like no, I'm not. I was like, Brammy and a nomination.
They're like, we have an Emmy too, and I was
(04:38):
like no, They're like, yeah, you do. I was like what.
I was like, this is a crazy way to discover that.
So is a friends and family Emmy. I think for
a show that we uh. I think it was the
view was it the Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was like,
that's pretty cool. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Wow. So I have been enjoying your album, Cassandra just
came out, so it's available, go get it, go get it,
and I have really been sinking into it. And the
thing that was like really powerful to me is I'm like, oh,
this whole album is a spiritual journey and.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Love, absolutely absolutely, of all different kinds God different love,
divine love, godly love, love for myself, love with other people,
and all the bumps and all the things along the way.
It's one hundred percent that. Yes, I love that. That's
what you picked up for me. Yeah, that makes me
so happy.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Every every song and every like all the themes I
was feeling from each song, I was like, oh wow,
I'm being led and like being walked through this, you know,
this kind of labyrinth of love and all the different
all the different ways that you can experience it.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
Absolutely, that's quite the undertaking as a singer, as a songwriter.
How did love become the vision for this and especially
in such like a multifaceted way.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
You know, it's so interesting, Like you said, it's it
can be a challenge, it can be an undertaking, but
I I think if you the truth of the matter is,
I feel like life is actually that you know what
I mean. So it's funny. I think that if you're
present and you are open, you know what I mean,
and you're willing to actually share those things. You know,
(06:15):
there's something we talk about, like I'm a person of faith,
and there's something we talk about which is like a testimony,
which is just your life. It's your story. Like people
always want to tell people what to do and all
the things, but it's like it's actually your life that's
probably the thing that's the most influential people. And so
I think that, like, you know, if you're willing to share,
because it's a really scary thing to do, I think
to be vulnerable and to be open. But I think
(06:35):
if you're willing to share, then life, you know, no
matter what you do, whether it's music or any type
of visual media or painting or movie telling or storytelling,
you know, movies. I think if you're willing to be
open and you're willing to be candid and share and
show all of the good parts and the ugly parts,
and you kind of end up just taking people on
a jail. Like I feel like we're all on this
(06:56):
really big love journey, you know what I'm saying, And
that's for me. Starts with with God and you know,
God's love for me, mind for God, and then my
love for myself, you know, which has been the harder
part of the journey, I think. And then my love
for other people and there's for me. So it's it's interesting,
it's I think the hard part about it isn't necessarily
(07:17):
crafting it. I think it's being overcoming your fear to
be vulnerable enough to actually talk about these things, you know,
and then it kind of crafts itself a little bit.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
You know, and talk about it in the sense too
of it being in service too, because I think there's
a difference like when artists create with love as the inspiration,
because you can be talking or creating with love from the.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Wounded capacity, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
And then you can be creating about love from like
the wisdom path, which is I'm on the other side
of it, and so I understand the layers and I
can share it.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
With you, yes, one hundred percent. And actually, and while
I think both can be useful, you know what I'm saying.
I think sometimes sometimes and someone's in the midst of something.
You just need to hear someone in the midst of something.
But I think the tool, when it's used as a tool,
it is in service of right because even when you're
in the midst of something, if you hear some music
(08:13):
or a piece of something someone going through the same thing,
it's still as helpful because it makes you go, I'm
not the only one. And sometimes that's the little nugget
that you need to be like, oh, there's a way,
you know what I mean. This isn't this particular thing
I'm dealing with, or this pain or heartbreak or whatever
it is. It's not I'm not isolated here, you know
what I mean. This is not unfamiliar. But to speak
(08:33):
to what you were talking about, I think for me,
it's interesting that you say that because I'm very much
like that. And I was actually talking to another artist
for and like not too long ago, and she's like
that too, where we both were like, I can't really
write or necessarily create when I'm in the midst of it,
Like I have to just go through it, you know
what I mean. It's so hard, and my hat's off
to people who can do that, but I need I
(08:55):
don't even necessarily need to be fully out of it.
But I need to have gained some siety, right, I
need to have gained some clarity. I need to when
I can start to see, you know again, my relationship
with God. When I can start to see myself and
that person more clearly, that's when I can start to
talk about it, you know what I'm saying, Like literally
right on the heels of where I'm like, Oh, this
(09:18):
is what this was for, you know what I mean,
this relationship, it might not have lasted forever, but it
was meant to teach me about boundaries, or it was
meant to teach me about myself and how I move
in relationships, or where I've been selfish or where I've
been too lenient, you know what I mean. And so
I am definitely that way. It is in service of
like I have to reflect in order to actually speak
(09:39):
about it and sing about it. And so I think
for me it helps because you know then, like you said,
you're speaking from a place of hopefully from a place
of learn, you know, learney, and like revelation and understanding,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
It's interesting because, like in meditation, the goal of where
you're always trying to to What you're pursuing when you
meditate is to come into the role of being the
silent observer, the observer of self and everything around you.
And like, that's what I hear and what you're saying
in your process. It's like I've observed it. I have
(10:16):
a grasp of it now, and so I'm speaking to
love from less of this like personalized happening to me
space and where I'm standing on the outside of me,
and it's like, ah, this is what's going on. It's
actually holistic, you know what I mean. So it's really yeah,
and I think that that because there are many facets.
You know, when people talk about love issues again, it
can just be a person at verse relationship.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I'm like, oh, the array of love, right, you know
what I mean, how multifaceted it is. I think can
be missed if you're only talking about it, like you said,
from the wounded in the midst of it perspective, you know,
And a lot of the healing comes from not even
the love of that relationship, but you know, the self
love the God. I mean for sure you know.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
That from that standpoint too. I'm so curious because you know,
I definitely feel and hear and see the deep connection
to God, to source, to love itself. And I think
it's really powerful to approach it in the way that
you did. Like everyone, we look at love sometimes as
this this thing, this outward experience, or we think that
(11:26):
it's so compartmentalized, like it's like that's romantic love. But
this is the love I have for my child, and
this love I have for myself, and my love is
love like love is love. It is prismatic, it is
you know, all encompassing. But I'm so curious because it
one of the things and I'm going to read this specifically.
It's like this project examines every iteration of love, lost, gained, rekindled,
(11:51):
interpersonal and with a higher power. Tell me about how
you experience all of that. How did you approach kind
of unpacking it and how do you feel it?
Speaker 2 (12:02):
That's really good. Oh that's a good question. Ooh, that's
good because it was gonna make me, you know, like,
let me take a second think about this. Now, how
do I experience that? Uh? It's interesting because I also think, okay,
how do I experience it? Like you said, love is
(12:23):
a lot of things, Love sometimes is simply as also
growth as well too, you know what I mean. That Like,
I think that's where but I think for me personally,
so I'll just talk about for me, love definitely starts
with my relationship with God. It starts with my my
just experiencing love and actually receiving it, you know what
(12:44):
I mean, which is in a way that's actually unconditional.
You know what I mean. There's something that we hear
all the time that says that God's love is unconditional.
God's grace and mercy is are new daily, you know
what I mean. They never run out you know, as people,
of course, we run out with finite, you know what
I mean. But I when I learned to accept it
and receive, and that's when my self love comes in
is also like accepting and receiving that, like this love
(13:06):
and this well of love that you have is not.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
Going to reun dry.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Because I struggle with that. I'm kind of like, yeah,
but I messed up here and I did this, and
so I do and I've my whole life, I've dealt
with that, you know what I mean. And it's interesting
because in this season, with this album, is the first
time I'm being like, wow, I'm really loved. Like I'm loved,
I'm intentional, I'm purposed, you know what I'm saying to
be here, and so it really really starts there. And
(13:31):
so I've made tons of mistakes in my life, you know,
and I've gotten and I'm getting to a point of
learning to like forgive myself and love myself because again,
there is a constant love that I do have in
my life. For me, everybody has different whatever their sources whatever.
For me, that is God. And then from that place
(13:51):
of learning to love myself, I'm like, oh, so now
I can actually see how to love, you know what
I'm saying like other people, and learn how to have
grace and like Marcie and understanding and like to try
not to deal with people from the seat of offense.
Does that make sense? You know what I mean? It's hard,
It's for sure hard. We're gonna do it, you know
what I mean at times, But even in that, it's
(14:14):
like I don't have to do it perfectly, like you
know what I mean, try to that's my desire, That's
what I want. But to understand, like, oh, now, in
my life, I want to be a safe place for people,
you know what I mean now in my life, like
I want people to be able to be truthful and
be comfortable and be vulnerable and all the things, because
nobody is. I hate even when the term nobody's perfect
because it's so far away from what weir you know
(14:35):
what I mean, We're not, you know, Like, but it's
like there's something. It teaches me how to love people
and how to treat people and how to value them.
If you don't value them, you can't really love them.
But when, because of my relationship with God, when I
see every person I walk into a room with like like,
you know, all of us are made up of vibrations, right,
(14:56):
I was talking about this the other day. Down to
an atomic level, sub atomic level, we are actually made
up of sound, which is crazy because for me, you
hear like God spoke. Right. So then when I can
walk into a room and I can look at everybody
like while you're actually the vibrating voice of God, of
love itself, the source of love. Like, then even if
(15:17):
I'm mad at you, I still got to treat you
with respect and treat you differently, you know what I mean,
Like I have to walk with honor. So that relationship
with love has really taught me how to love myself,
which is still a process, and how to love you know,
other people and not deal with them out of their
issues are my issues, but like their inherent value, you.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Yes, Yeah, so that's definitely a very interconnected.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Thing for sure. Yes, And that is that's the Journey's
that's the journey for sure.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
Yes, Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Especially like what I'm hearing and what you're saying, it's like,
no matter what's happening, extending dignity to every being.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
One hundred percent of you. Absolutely absolutely, And I think
just it's just it's hard because life gets hard, you
know what I'm saying, life, you're way heavily like. But
I think when you can, like you said, see people's
inherent value and understand that everybody is going through something,
you know what I mean, then I think it Oddly enough,
(16:18):
people look at it as like, oh, you're just letting
people off the hook, and like it actually frees you
right yourself, you know, so you kind of can walk
around with a little bit even if you frustrate, you
have a little bit more peace because it's like this
isn't a foreign thing, like we're all kind of dealing
with these things.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
You know. Yeah, it's so powerful to say that because,
as you said, life is challenging. Yeah, also by design.
Yeah's exactly right. You've got to make it to heaven.
Why are we in heaven now?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Yeah? And this idea is like I always have this
the phrase. I always think about this phrase all the time.
The gold is refined in fire, like it is purified
and made beautiful and perfect, and this beautiful, amazing thing
through fire, you know what I mean. So yeah, yeah,
it's definitely hard, you know what I mean. So, like
you said, having just patience and grace and understanding with
people and look at them based on the value not
(17:07):
their stuff, you know what I'm.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
Saying, And like the bigger stories that are at play
just about like our absolute activity and everything is refined
in relationship.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yes, for sure, absolutely that is so. So you're great.
This is a great way to come to work. I
was like, why do I have the coded places? I
love it here we're in the area. What's your favorite
song on the album? Oh? Okay, so that changes all
the time. It depends, Yeah, it depends on but I
think one of my favorite songs on the album pretty
(17:41):
consistently is nervous. It's a song called Nervous. Yeah, I
really really love that song because I I initially wrote
it for women, right, you know what I mean, Because
there is this thing that happens when you're a woman,
especially when you're standing in your power, you know what
I mean, where it's like all of these weird narratives
to well, women will take over women as also like
(18:03):
they might, but who care? You know what I mean?
Who cares? Like and they do, but who cares? And
so it's this idea that it's like a woman standing
in her power is really threatening, right, you know what
I mean? And then as I was finishing the song,
I'm realizing, I'm like, this applies to everyone. Everyone standing
in their power can be feel threatening to someone or
feel you know. But there's it's like this idea that
(18:25):
it's like the colonization mentality, right, you know, you have
something that's so powerful and it's influential, and instead of
me receiving it, you know, and being blessed by it
the way I was intended to, now I need to
sort of colonize it, control it and suppress it and
all the things. Whereas like and why because of fear
because it makes us uncomfortable. You as a woman standing
in your power, as a person of color, standing as
(18:47):
a queer person standing in your power makes people uncomfortable.
But the truth is we're not meant to be comfortable,
you know what I mean. So it's like there's this
idea that like we might be, but likes people say,
blocking our a blessing is trying to suppress someone else's
whatever that thing is, whatever that power is, as opposed
to being like it's supposed to make you uncomfortable because
(19:09):
it's designed to grow you, you know what I mean.
So it's like it's like a system, like you said
at play, that we miss because we're too busy trying
to get comfortable, and that's not how we're designed to be.
I don't think you know what I mean. So yeah,
that's why that's so good.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Yeah, that's so good, especially in this day and age.
Like it's so deep because in this day and age,
especially as we're being like equipped with different like language
and understandings, right, Like, people are very hyper aware of.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Their triggers, right right, Yes.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
And you know there is this kind of thing happening
where it's it's about having boundaries and not getting triggered.
And it's like, no, no, you're supposed to get triggered. Yeah,
some things are supposed to trigger you. Yeah, it's not
about like insulating yourself and staying away from all the
trigger because like, yes, exactly, Oh you're triggered investigated.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Yeah, that'd be with it. Yeah, that's the interesting thing.
And I'm like, even in this discovery of like boundaries
and now and how they can be good, but it's
also a part of that discovery is that like, yeah,
the boundaries I'm discovering that are good, aren't boundaries meant
to keep me safe and protected and locked in this
da da da. There are certain boundaries that go, hey,
some things are are antithetical to my growth into my
(20:18):
path and to my purpose, or they're just simply not
for me, you know what I mean. So the boundaries
are more about creating a lane rather where you're growing
and as opposed to creating a box, you know what
I mean. So it's like I agree with you, You're right,
there's this very like it seems like self care has
become like just be calm all the time, you know
what I mean, or just just you know, be comfortable.
(20:39):
Like you said, have all these boundaries be locked in,
be safe? Da da da. But you're right, like agreed,
we're not supposed to be growth it becomes is an
uncomfortable thing, you know what I mean. It's not comfortable
for our baby's bones to be stretching and growing it,
you know what I mean. Like, so it's kind of
like that idea that like, yeah, self care isn't just
(21:00):
and also safety is I'm one of those people that
believes like the idea that like, Okay, I found the
box where I'm safe and all the stuff. It's a
little bit of a facadey, you know what I'm saying,
like like.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
So, yeah, I agree, what's performance? What's hyper vigilance? And
what is like exactly, God, that is so so, so
so good, And it's just you know what you're speaking to.
It's like that multifaceted feeling approach. It isn't meant to
be peace. I tell people all the time, I go to.
Speaker 2 (21:30):
Rage rooms like right, spend money to break stuff? Right,
Yeah exactly. I haven't gone yet. I actually really want
to try that. Who where we just I think I
was just talking about it with some star Thos people
on that couch. So that's why we have a girl
studio today. We're a bunch of beautiful, wonderful women. Also, no,
(21:50):
I haven't tried one of those yet. You've been to one?
Oh my god, I want to try it. I really
want to go.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Yeah, I've been sacred rage. Yes, we have to let
ourselves be everything. And it's like that this idea of
bypassing and just coming to peace. I'm not going to recommend.
I don't know what you've been through. You might need
to release a lot of stuff. Absolutely, I agree, but yeah,
I'll give you the details.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
Yeah, okay, I'm gonna check it out.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
A really cool experience. Like you go into this room.
You have like a mask and all this stuff, and
then you can put on your own music, and you
have a clock for however much time, and they bring
you this box full of all this breakable stuff.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I love it, old electronics.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Dishes, porcelain, and they give you a bat and they
give you a crowbar. I'm going in like the first
time you do it. The first time I threw it,
I was like, oh my gosh, ah, like you know,
and you're like, you know, it's kind of broken. You're
like okay, and the next thing, it's like I'm throwing
(22:51):
stuff in there, crowbar like a bat, like just going
love that.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I agree, we do have to get it out, you
know me absolutely.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
Deeply well, and your huge starring debut as one of
jess the most iconic figures in history and musical history
and civil rights history. Yes, Billie Holiday, this movie was
(23:29):
so heavy. It was incredible. You were phenomenal, you fanomal
But the layers of it, right, Like, it's like one
obviously the layers of racism, but then the layers of pain,
black pain, black woman pain, how we pacify ourselves, and
(23:52):
then also like mistreatment and manipulation and love like that
was so striking to me, how every man she fell
in love with was incredibly unsafe for her.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
One hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Yeah, what kind of toll did this role take on
your spirit?
Speaker 2 (24:12):
It's so a I'm so glad you were able to
kind of see all of that, you know, because that
is that's a conversation and it's a really hard conversation
for black women and for women of color to have,
right you know what I mean, It's because it's sort
of like this idea that like don't talk about your
pain or your experiences. Like within the community, it's almost
like we have to be a monolith in order to
(24:33):
get over this hill in order. But I think that
healing is from the inside out, you know what I mean,
And we need to be able to everybody needs to
have their space to express, you know, because that was
a huge thing that was I think one of the
things that probably stuck with me the most about her
person and playing her was the relationships. It absolutely affected
(24:54):
my real life relationships really and I definitely I was
in one for four years that I lost, you know
when I when I came out because I was it
was just this need to be loved and validated. It
was so deep. But you can imagine being a black
woman in the thirties and the forties is just like
no one loves you, right, you know what I mean.
And then what you were forced to accept like Billy
(25:16):
did as love is truly abuse, abuse in its most
pure form, you know. And that's the thing the only
use your clips one hundred percent, like mental, the emotional,
the fabsolutely ravages before even any of the physical. All
of that that robbing you of your piece, you know
what I mean. But as a black woman, during that time,
(25:37):
It's like, well, I'd rather take this little nugget of nothing,
that's a teeny bit of affection wrapped in a whole
bunch of abuse, because where else am I going to
get it from, you know what I mean. So that
need and that instant gratification taking whatever, for sure permeated
my life, you know what I mean. That definitely became
(25:57):
a part of kind of how I was moving, you
know what I mean. I don't think I really realized
it as much until later, you know, because I was
still in it, and you know, there's a lot of things.
I mean, playing Billy first of all, I want to
say that, like working with Lee and working with Tasha
and that cast was just one of the greatest experiences
(26:18):
in my life. But being her was really one of
the greatest experiences in my life. I really loved loved
being her. You know. There was just such an unhinged
kind of bravery and fear, and everything felt heightened, Everything
felt so much more urgent everything. You know that by
the time I flew back and landed in LA it
(26:38):
was just like being at an airport was the was
like worst viewing because I was just like, what is
the point this is so, like, you know what I mean,
was the point of all this? What is important about this?
What are we? So I will say that, you know.
And then so there were really great ways that she
impacted me, and then there were ways that were harder,
Like I said, in love and in relationships, it's hard
(27:00):
to find like my grounding, you know, kind of my
delibrium again, but I will say that, like, I think
what helped me a my relationship with God is what
helped me right, relationship with the Lord and I. One
of the things was realizing that like instead of trying
(27:23):
to figure out, Okay, wow, I just went through this
insane thing for years and now I got to get
back to who I was and function exactly how it was.
It was impossible, you know what I mean. So I
spent two years trying to figure out that that's actually
not what I'm supposed to do. And God really like
got to hold me and was like, hey, you were
supposed to be grown by this, you were supposed to
be changed by this experience.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Let's get rid of some of the bad stuff and
some of the negative stuff, some of the talks of
things and let's but keep the things that are supposed
to make you who you are for this season. Had
you not done this movie, well, how had you not
played her and connected with her so deep, I would
not be prepared for whatever it is that's laid out
for me in this season. So wow, that really helped.
It definitely changed me some ways good, some ways really
(28:09):
really rough because I felt all of her anxiety and
her pain and her fight. But then I realized, oh,
I needed to feel that so that I could be
prepared for everything that's coming up. So in a lot
of good ways too, you know.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
My goodness, I can really imagine, Yeah, I can really imagine.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
It feels like her life does not feel like I
was saying this earlier. I was like, doesn't feel like
I was, doesn't feel like memories of a movie set.
Right when I leave here, I'll remember when we were
on set and the lights and the moment that we
had and the genuineness of our But I will remember
all of the you know, hey, great, this was a
great interview, with great conversation to great and with playing
(28:53):
her for such a long time, it's like sometimes I
was getting mixed up the memories of my life and
hers because it just kind of felt like life memories,
you know what I mean. So it was she has
that much weight to her, Like she really has that
much weight to her. It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
There are so many places I want to take this
kud I love it.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
I love it. I love it. You're so great.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
I'm like, oh my god, because I jet Oh god,
I can just imagine like the kind of existential crisis
that that can really submerge you in, and you even saying,
you know, being in that experience of and then you
exit this portal, this different reality that you're existing in
and you're at the airport. Wa shodnt.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
People do human things and it's very normal and there's
nothing wrong with what they're living their life, you know
what I mean. But you're almost I'm not gonna lie.
I think when I landed, I was as I was
flying over into the city, I didn't like it and
like the way it was looking, you know, I was
flying back to LA I got to the airport and
I was kind of angry at people, you know what
I mean, Like, but I didn't realize how much of
(29:54):
that was sort of a chip on my shoulder from
living because here's the thing. We filmed the movie for
September to December. We were there for four months, right,
which four months doesn't seem like a long time, except
that I had been preparing for since the end of
twenty seventeen. So it was like the last part of
latter part of twenty seventeen, all of twenty eighteen, all
(30:17):
of twenty nineteen, all of twenty twenty because we had
to do pickup shoots and all that stuff too, and
then we started the pressing promo one in twenty twenty one.
So it's like, that's four years of like and in
the pandemic, and the pandemic hits, and so it's like,
now you're locked inside and you're which I can't I
still can't tell if that was the isolation of it
was better or worse, because I don't know that I
(30:37):
would have been ready to be very submerged in just
the hustle and mustle of people and daily life. So
I don't know, but it was. But it was four
years of being another person, you know what I mean.
So I think that's when everything starts to come to
you're like, oh, you know. There was such an urgency
to her life every day that felt like I was
(30:57):
really lacking when I got to mine, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
Wow, Wow, it's just so deep, it's so heavy, it's
so much.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
You feel her for sure, Yeah, do.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
You feel like spiritually did you feel like her presence
with Oh?
Speaker 2 (31:15):
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
It's funny. We actually had a dream, he had a
dream about her the last few days of filming, you
know what I mean, And she was getting into a cab.
She cussed in him about something and then she was
but she was happy with what we were doing, you
know what I mean. But that was one of the
things we used to say. We were sort of like,
if Billy's happy is she's not like, oh, you did
great and good for you guys. She's probably cussing you out,
(31:39):
you know what I'm saying, and like whatever. But I
absolutely felt her presence. And it's funny because my acting
coach would say something, she knows that I was a believer,
and so she would pray for me and pray over me,
and then we would talk about checking into the Billy dream, right,
you know what I mean, the life. And it's funny
because I was like, and it wasn't until this movie
that I was like, you know as a like there's
(32:00):
like there's different things that you think, you know what
I mean about different things, Okay. And it wasn't until
this movie that I discovered this scripture that was like
talking about how we that we do tap in with
what's called like the cloud of witnesses, like people, our ancestors,
people who came before us that have passed on and
we're allowed to tap and they're allowed to tap us
and all that stuff. I was like, wow, that must
(32:21):
be what that is and was because it was very
like it's weird again. Like I said, it's not necessarily
like feeling her. It was just being her, if that
makes sense, you know what I mean. She stepped in. Yeah,
So it didn't feel like it was like, oh my gosh,
I feel her super perwered. It was just kind of
like whoever I was, I felt like that's who to me,
(32:45):
felt like that's who's that was her, you know what
I mean? That was the person in the vessel and
the presence, And I loved it. It was a ride.
It was a ride because she's actually hell of fun,
you know what I mean, Like she's really fun. She's
definitely crazy, but like she's for sure shot out. You know,
I always think about this, like I think that our
(33:07):
mentality of people right on this side of the generation
we go right, we have our pillars are Maya Angelous,
who just like you know, have elevated you know, almost
a sainthood, and like you know, but then I think
about people in Billy's time when I read her, you know,
bio and I just spent time as her. And then
I read about someone like Maya Angelo writing about Billy Oliday.
(33:29):
And there's a story Maya tells her son very fondly
all the time, and she told her son how she
was performing at a club one time and she was
singing it. Billy was in the club with glasses on,
and this is her health had very seriously deteriorated by
this point time. But nobody cusses out may Angelou because
who does that, right, you know what I'm saying, But
like if you came from a different era, in a
(33:49):
different time. She tells the story about how she was
in a club singing and she got sunglasses on. She
has a moved, She's chainsmoking the entire time, and then
all of a sudden, Maya's singing and did all stuff
and Billy jumps up and she's just like, shut that
bitch up. I was like, oh my god, there's just
certain things you read were and then when you're connected
(34:10):
to her, right, I was like Bally, not by her,
but to her at the time, it was just like
she was the biggest and she had all of this
other stuff going on in her face. But may when
she explained the stories she said, Billy went off and
she said, shut that bitchup. She sounds like my mother,
and everybody's like, what is happening right now? And then
all of a sudden, she gets really insecure because everyone's
(34:31):
looking out, so she runs into the bathroom. Maya runs
in after her. She was like, you know, and she
said she saw somebody who was really hurt and broken,
and she kind of took her glasses off and she
looked at her and then she said, you see all
those people out there clapping when you said my name,
and make says yeah, you know what I mean. Basically,
they're just she's like says something along the lines, and
they're just excited to see a train wreck like a junkie.
(34:53):
You know what I'm saying. It's really interesting, Like she
she has such this crazy spirit you know what I mean,
definitely experienced it and felt it, and I very very
much love this woman like she my can and myself
and my you know what I mean. So yeah, wow
for sure. But it's like who cusses on my stock?
You know what I mean? Like, I'm from a whole
(35:15):
different side of this era, you know, National Treasure, treasure,
that's just like but you hear those stories and you go, wow,
this was a different thing we were talking about and
dealing with at the time, you know what I mean. Oh, God,
bless her, God bless her absolutely, God bless her soul
for sure.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
Last question, when I hear a voice like yours, especially
like especially on Rise Up, I don't even know how
this question needs to come out. I guess I'm just
curious about your response.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
But now I'm very very clo.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
You're one. I mean, you just have an exquisite voice.
Speaker 2 (35:53):
It's so thank you, thank you, so beautiful, but it's.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
So invocative and like your voice, the healing I hear
in your voice is the fact that like you can
hear emotion process through it as you sing to something,
which includes like hearing sometimes the ache, right hearing the pain,
hearing the pull like I feel like I hear the
(36:18):
stretching of growth in your voice, and I'm just so curious,
like how it's always been your voice? Yeah, so how
does that interplay with your artistry? Like did you always
know you were kind of designed to sing deeper songs?
Because this isn't a voice for silly songs, right, Like,
this isn't.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
A voice I love for like not right not in
my head. They're so funny. My team is so funny
and truly crazy, a petty out and hot talking about here.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
This isn't a voice for j just like singing simple
silly things like this is a voice to make people
feel And I'm just curious how you experience that or
how you how that influenced you, especially as you were
growing up, coming into the voice, coming into the songwriting.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
Yeah, that's a really good question. Wow, And thank you
for saying that so much. Thank you, thank you. You know,
I will say I think that the process, it was
a process, right, you know, Like, and to be honest
with you, that's most of the time I'm saying silly,
stupid stuff most like, I get it all out. I
feel like in life when I'm talking with like friends
(37:23):
and family, and joking with them. It's always dumb stuff.
Like I did an interview. Have you heard of the scene?
You know Judith Hill by the way, you should definitely,
oh God, would you would absolutely love her? She is
you would love her? Okay, well, she's one of my
closest friends ever. But we crack up laughing because people
always ask us. I think they think that our conversations
are always very, very deep, and they are. They are
in the sense that, like, she's also a believer too,
(37:44):
so like we literally spend time in fellowship and like
praying and worshiping and in the Word and studying and edifying.
We do do that. But when it comes to music
and all, it's like her and I literally talk about
dumb things all the time. It's like you need the
to be able to turn your brain off sometimes and
other people. So anyway, I was saying that to say
(38:04):
that I spent a lot of time doing dumb things,
but I need an outlet, you know what I mean.
But I think even musically, you know, it's interesting because
it was a journey. It was a journey to accepting
my voice. First of all, I didn't like it because
I didn't like the tone it's super brassy, and I'm
just like ew Like sometimes I'm like, who's gonna like
(38:25):
like this? Like this right? You know what I mean?
That's what it sounds like to me sometimes. But I
will say part of the reason I love Billy is
because it is her artistry that helped me accept my voice.
Like I was introduced to her at the age eleven,
and it was her artistry and her voice that helped
me accept my own. Because there's a clip of her
speaking about her own singing voice and she says, you know,
(38:47):
because people alway say, well, she didn't have much of
a ray, and she didn't have she wasn't unaware of
these things. Like she was just like, yeah, it doesn't
do too much. My voice goes up a little bit,
comes down a little bit, but it's my voice. You
really like it or you don't, you know what I mean.
And so her stand and that was one of the
most influential things I'd ever heard or you know, because
I was like, wow, okay, you know, instead of trying
(39:08):
to before it was like these singers who I wanted
to sound like and sing like and all these things.
Then with her, it was like, oh, I want to
do my thing, you know what I mean, the way
she did her things. So she really helped to empower
me in that way, right, And so it was a
process of accepting my voice. And it's really interesting. I
don't think it was ever a moment that I was like, hey,
(39:28):
my voice is meant to do powerful things and to
be powerful and all. I think it just I mean,
I'm just a prayerful person, you know what I'm saying.
And I think when I really like well as what
I say was like probably in like later twenties, when
I kind of like gave my life back to Christ,
gave my life to that, then that prayer and how
(39:53):
I impact people became intentional, you know what I'm saying.
And so it was almost it's sort of inadver certainly
happened that it happened to be on serious things and
happened to be kind of a place of testimony, a
place of reflection because I just singing from a real
place of like pain or like desire or growth or
(40:14):
you know. So honestly, I can't even say that I
crafted it and was like, oh, yes, I want to
do just serious things happened to grab my attention, like
you know, even when things comes to ability, like hearing
strange fruit and knowing what she sacrificed for that, Like
that mattered to me, you know what I mean, hearing
the weight of like people my mother's own. When I
(40:34):
think of my mom and her own story of survival,
I'm like, WHOA. Like it changed the way I looked
at her, the way all the stuff that used to
annoying me became things that I was like, Wow, I
really admire you, Like that's not you just getting by
this youth thriving. Like So, I don't know, those things
just mattered to me, And so I think what happened
is that inadvertently that made its way into the music,
(40:57):
you know what I mean. Yeah, So I don't know
that it was really a place. It just as your
person develops, I think, like I said, if you being
authentic and present, then I think your artistry develops, you
know what I mean. So I think that's kind of
how that's a good question. She drew. She was like,
we're going in here. I'm not staying up here. You're
gonna do that for your other interviews. We're going here
(41:17):
and we're going into the room. Okay, Oh wow, you're
so amazing to talk to you, by the way, thank you, likewise.
Speaker 1 (41:29):
Likewise deeply well. At the end of every show, I
invite our guests to share a little bit of like homework,
soul work is what I call it, so that as
everyone hears the show, they can spend the week till
the next episode integrating.
Speaker 2 (41:50):
I love that. So that can be like a.
Speaker 1 (41:51):
Practice or even a journal prompt or just a quote
a thought you'd like to leave everyone with to kind
of savor for the next week.
Speaker 2 (42:00):
Oh okay, okay, you know what I'll do. Actually, this
has kind of been like the theme of the album,
so it actually works, you know what I mean. It's
not a shameless plug. This actually works.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
But it is in stores now. Castra No.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
One of the things on my record, like you know,
is that's why there's themes of like in the artwork.
There's SAMs of desert and there's seams of water. There's
a place it's called Cherif because Cherith is a scriptures
called in scripture, it's called the brook Cherit, which is
it means to cut away or the place of isolation,
and it's where God brought the prophet Elijah to fill
(42:36):
him up, you know. What I mean, drink water from
the brook. I will command the birds to bring you
bread and meat. He went empty, he went completely empty,
but everything he needed he had, you know what I mean,
to prepare him for his mountaintop moment. So I'm examining
in life. I think we walk around often walk living
life from a place of black. You know what I mean.
We're not enough, we don't have, we are less than.
(42:58):
And it's funny because even the most empowered of us,
that thought will creep its way and it will find
you know, yeah, and we really you know, I think
about we were talking about this the other day, the
scripture where God said it is finished, like we really
were created, Like you are a whole, complete, incredible work
and the only one of your kind, incredibly valuable. So
(43:19):
like I think the homework thing would be like. And
that's one of the themes for the album. I'm on
this journey, as you said, and I want people to
go on it with me, but to try choosing your
One of the things I say is believe the things
that God says about you and not the things that
like people or society or your own self doubt says
(43:40):
about you. Because you need to be in a place
of lack to consume, right, So am I say believe
the try living each day conscious of like believing the
things God says about you, which is you are fully,
fully loved and desired, you know what I mean? Because
that's a big thing. Like we're like, yeah, we know
we're loved, but I want to be one to we're
(44:00):
desired and we're are loved and that you absolutely have
everything you need. So I'm kind of looking at the
album like, what does it look like to live life
truly from a place of abundance versus a place of
black What does it look like if I walk every
day going like I have everything I need in here
and in community, Like because there's something crazy about the
(44:22):
fact that all of us exist in this time and
have linked up and met, you know what I mean? Like,
so to walk through each day this week and each
moment this week conscious of the fact that, like you
have been given and blessed with every single thing that
you need, the people, the community, da da da? How
does that change the way you approach things? I got
to get money from this person, da dada, as opposed
(44:42):
to Oh, I've I have a cameraman sitting right next
to me. I have a psalm, you know what I mean?
You have everything you need in yourself, in your community,
like spending the week in each moment. Whenever you feel
like I'm not enough, I don't have enough. I need this,
I need to consume. Let that thought process change to
like I have been blessed with every single thing that
I need everything, Like, how does that change the wain
(45:04):
we approach? So I would say, that's.
Speaker 1 (45:05):
The week's homework is that was gorgeous teaching.
Speaker 2 (45:09):
Yeah, it was so beautiful. That's a really good segment.
I love that. I love it here never I'm not
leave it.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Andre Day, thank you so much for joining us. Cassandra
is in stores now, in stores that's so outdated. That's
such an outdate, right.
Speaker 2 (45:27):
No worried. I love our virtual stores and UV stores y'all.
Speaker 1 (45:32):
Open your phone, get to Apple, right but I know
like there's even CD stores like right right for sure,
but still cute, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
So the record the vinyl will be out at some point, y'all,
just don't there's a few people cut my head off
about it were coming. Thank you so much for thank you,
thank you, bless you, thank you, thank God, bless God,
bless you to thank you. It's not misday.
Speaker 1 (45:59):
The content for presented on Deeply Wells serves solely for
educational and informational purposes. It should not be considered a
replacement for personalized medical or mental health guidance and does
not constitute a provider patient relationship. As always, it is
advisable to consult with your healthcare provider or health team
(46:19):
for any specific concerns or questions that you may have.
Connect with me on social at Debbie Brown. That's Twitter
and Instagram, or you can go to my website Debbie
Brown dot com. And if you're listening to the show on.
Speaker 2 (46:33):
Apple Podcasts, don't forget.
Speaker 1 (46:35):
Please rate, review, and subscribe and send this episode to
a friend. Deeply Well is a production of iHeartRadio and
The Black Effect Network. It's produced by Jacquess Thomas, Samantha
Timmins and me Debbie Brown. The Beautiful Soundbath You Heard
That's by Jarrelen Glass from Crystal Cadence. For more podcasts
(46:56):
from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app or where however you
listen to your favorite shows.
Take a deep breath in through your nose. Hold it now,
release slowly again, deep in helle hold release, repeating internally
(01:02):
to yourself as you connect to my voice. I am deeply,
deeply well. I I am deeply well. I am deeply
(01:30):
I'm Debbie Brown and this is the Deeply Well Podcast.
Welcome to Deeply Well, a soft place to land on
your journey. A podcast for those that are curious, creative,
and ready to expand in higher consciousness and self care.
(01:53):
I'm Debbie Brown. This is where we heal, this is
where we become. Today we have oh my gosh, extra extra,
extra extra special guest, huge fan. I actually was like
vibing to the album the whole week getting ready. So
we are going to dive into all the things extra
special guest. Grammy Award winning singer, songwriter, activist, and acclaimed
(02:17):
actress Andrew Day has been bearing her heart on the
world stage four years. She was initially best known for
her twenty sixteen Grammy nominated Rise Up, which amassed over
one billion streams and an r IAA triple platinum certification,
and she has performed alongside everyone from Stevie Wonder to
(02:38):
the Obamas to Nick Jonas Alicia Keys. In twenty twenty one,
her feature acting debut in the Lee Daniels directed biopic
The United States Versus Billie Holiday, in which she starred
as Holiday herself, earned a Golden Globe for Best Performance
by an Actress in a Motion Picture Drama and a
nomination for Best Actress at the Oscars. She also won
(03:01):
a Grammy Award for Best Soundtrack Visual Media and BET
Award for Best Actress. Since the film, she hasn't slowed down,
making appearances at the Golden Globes, The View, The Tonight Show,
and The Daily Show, among others. What's more, Andra continues
to support causes close to her heart and has worked
with Give Directly, Public Counsel, and the Biden Harris Administration,
(03:23):
to name a few. Her most recent studio album, Cassandra,
is a soulful and timeless body of work that captures
the artist essence and admitable vocals. Welcome to the show, thank.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
You, Wow, look the whole time? Who wrote that bio?
They may have that stuff up. No, it's actually really cool.
Sometimes you hear it back and you're like, wow, it's
pretty amazing.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
It's pretty amazing. And I mean, like some of the
things that stand out. I mean, God, okay, let me think,
because I have so many ways that I want to
wind through this conversation because I think the thing that
becomes so apparent, especially when you hear that album, but
definitely when you just hear the sound of your voice,
the word is like depth.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Oh wow, thank you, Like depth, like immediate depth.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
And it's like even to see an experience of it's
like your feature debut and you're Oscar nominated and you
go for Globe winning like that is wow.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Thank you, thank you so much. And Emmy Emmy, which
you're not gonna lie to you. I did not know
we had until what was it two years after what
I was talking to somebody about it. I think it
was like in an interview too that I can and
saying you and you got you're close to any guys,
Like no, I'm not. I was like, Brammy and a nomination.
They're like, we have an Emmy too, and I was
(04:38):
like no, They're like, yeah, you do. I was like what.
I was like, this is a crazy way to discover that.
So is a friends and family Emmy. I think for
a show that we uh. I think it was the
view was it the Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was like,
that's pretty cool. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Wow. So I have been enjoying your album, Cassandra just
came out, so it's available, go get it, go get it,
and I have really been sinking into it. And the
thing that was like really powerful to me is I'm like, oh,
this whole album is a spiritual journey and.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Love, absolutely absolutely, of all different kinds God different love,
divine love, godly love, love for myself, love with other people,
and all the bumps and all the things along the way.
It's one hundred percent that. Yes, I love that. That's
what you picked up for me. Yeah, that makes me
so happy.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Every every song and every like all the themes I
was feeling from each song, I was like, oh wow,
I'm being led and like being walked through this, you know,
this kind of labyrinth of love and all the different
all the different ways that you can experience it.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
Absolutely, that's quite the undertaking as a singer, as a songwriter.
How did love become the vision for this and especially
in such like a multifaceted way.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
You know, it's so interesting, Like you said, it's it
can be a challenge, it can be an undertaking, but
I I think if you the truth of the matter is,
I feel like life is actually that you know what
I mean. So it's funny. I think that if you're
present and you are open, you know what I mean,
and you're willing to actually share those things. You know,
(06:15):
there's something we talk about, like I'm a person of faith,
and there's something we talk about which is like a testimony,
which is just your life. It's your story. Like people
always want to tell people what to do and all
the things, but it's like it's actually your life that's
probably the thing that's the most influential people. And so
I think that, like, you know, if you're willing to share,
because it's a really scary thing to do, I think
to be vulnerable and to be open. But I think
(06:35):
if you're willing to share, then life, you know, no
matter what you do, whether it's music or any type
of visual media or painting or movie telling or storytelling,
you know, movies. I think if you're willing to be
open and you're willing to be candid and share and
show all of the good parts and the ugly parts,
and you kind of end up just taking people on
a jail. Like I feel like we're all on this
(06:56):
really big love journey, you know what I'm saying, And
that's for me. Starts with with God and you know,
God's love for me, mind for God, and then my
love for myself, you know, which has been the harder
part of the journey, I think. And then my love
for other people and there's for me. So it's it's interesting,
it's I think the hard part about it isn't necessarily
(07:17):
crafting it. I think it's being overcoming your fear to
be vulnerable enough to actually talk about these things, you know,
and then it kind of crafts itself a little bit.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
You know, and talk about it in the sense too
of it being in service too, because I think there's
a difference like when artists create with love as the inspiration,
because you can be talking or creating with love from the.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Wounded capacity, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
And then you can be creating about love from like
the wisdom path, which is I'm on the other side
of it, and so I understand the layers and I
can share it.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
With you, yes, one hundred percent. And actually, and while
I think both can be useful, you know what I'm saying.
I think sometimes sometimes and someone's in the midst of something.
You just need to hear someone in the midst of something.
But I think the tool, when it's used as a tool,
it is in service of right because even when you're
in the midst of something, if you hear some music
(08:13):
or a piece of something someone going through the same thing,
it's still as helpful because it makes you go, I'm
not the only one. And sometimes that's the little nugget
that you need to be like, oh, there's a way,
you know what I mean. This isn't this particular thing
I'm dealing with, or this pain or heartbreak or whatever
it is. It's not I'm not isolated here, you know
what I mean. This is not unfamiliar. But to speak
(08:33):
to what you were talking about, I think for me,
it's interesting that you say that because I'm very much
like that. And I was actually talking to another artist
for and like not too long ago, and she's like
that too, where we both were like, I can't really
write or necessarily create when I'm in the midst of it,
Like I have to just go through it, you know
what I mean. It's so hard, and my hat's off
to people who can do that, but I need I
(08:55):
don't even necessarily need to be fully out of it.
But I need to have gained some siety, right, I
need to have gained some clarity. I need to when
I can start to see, you know again, my relationship
with God. When I can start to see myself and
that person more clearly, that's when I can start to
talk about it, you know what I'm saying, Like literally
right on the heels of where I'm like, Oh, this
(09:18):
is what this was for, you know what I mean,
this relationship, it might not have lasted forever, but it
was meant to teach me about boundaries, or it was
meant to teach me about myself and how I move
in relationships, or where I've been selfish or where I've
been too lenient, you know what I mean. And so
I am definitely that way. It is in service of
like I have to reflect in order to actually speak
(09:39):
about it and sing about it. And so I think
for me it helps because you know then, like you said,
you're speaking from a place of hopefully from a place
of learn, you know, learney, and like revelation and understanding,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
It's interesting because, like in meditation, the goal of where
you're always trying to to What you're pursuing when you
meditate is to come into the role of being the
silent observer, the observer of self and everything around you.
And like, that's what I hear and what you're saying
in your process. It's like I've observed it. I have
(10:16):
a grasp of it now, and so I'm speaking to
love from less of this like personalized happening to me
space and where I'm standing on the outside of me,
and it's like, ah, this is what's going on. It's
actually holistic, you know what I mean. So it's really yeah,
and I think that that because there are many facets.
You know, when people talk about love issues again, it
can just be a person at verse relationship.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I'm like, oh, the array of love, right, you know
what I mean, how multifaceted it is. I think can
be missed if you're only talking about it, like you said,
from the wounded in the midst of it perspective, you know,
And a lot of the healing comes from not even
the love of that relationship, but you know, the self
love the God. I mean for sure you know.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
That from that standpoint too. I'm so curious because you know,
I definitely feel and hear and see the deep connection
to God, to source, to love itself. And I think
it's really powerful to approach it in the way that
you did. Like everyone, we look at love sometimes as
this this thing, this outward experience, or we think that
(11:26):
it's so compartmentalized, like it's like that's romantic love. But
this is the love I have for my child, and
this love I have for myself, and my love is
love like love is love. It is prismatic, it is
you know, all encompassing. But I'm so curious because it
one of the things and I'm going to read this specifically.
It's like this project examines every iteration of love, lost, gained, rekindled,
(11:51):
interpersonal and with a higher power. Tell me about how
you experience all of that. How did you approach kind
of unpacking it and how do you feel it?
Speaker 2 (12:02):
That's really good. Oh that's a good question. Ooh, that's
good because it was gonna make me, you know, like,
let me take a second think about this. Now, how
do I experience that? Uh? It's interesting because I also think, okay,
how do I experience it? Like you said, love is
(12:23):
a lot of things, Love sometimes is simply as also
growth as well too, you know what I mean. That Like,
I think that's where but I think for me personally,
so I'll just talk about for me, love definitely starts
with my relationship with God. It starts with my my
just experiencing love and actually receiving it, you know what
(12:44):
I mean, which is in a way that's actually unconditional.
You know what I mean. There's something that we hear
all the time that says that God's love is unconditional.
God's grace and mercy is are new daily, you know
what I mean. They never run out you know, as people,
of course, we run out with finite, you know what
I mean. But I when I learned to accept it
and receive, and that's when my self love comes in
is also like accepting and receiving that, like this love
(13:06):
and this well of love that you have is not.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
Going to reun dry.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Because I struggle with that. I'm kind of like, yeah,
but I messed up here and I did this, and
so I do and I've my whole life, I've dealt
with that, you know what I mean. And it's interesting
because in this season, with this album, is the first
time I'm being like, wow, I'm really loved. Like I'm loved,
I'm intentional, I'm purposed, you know what I'm saying to
be here, and so it really really starts there. And
(13:31):
so I've made tons of mistakes in my life, you know,
and I've gotten and I'm getting to a point of
learning to like forgive myself and love myself because again,
there is a constant love that I do have in
my life. For me, everybody has different whatever their sources whatever.
For me, that is God. And then from that place
(13:51):
of learning to love myself, I'm like, oh, so now
I can actually see how to love, you know what
I'm saying like other people, and learn how to have
grace and like Marcie and understanding and like to try
not to deal with people from the seat of offense.
Does that make sense? You know what I mean? It's hard,
It's for sure hard. We're gonna do it, you know
what I mean at times, But even in that, it's
(14:14):
like I don't have to do it perfectly, like you
know what I mean, try to that's my desire, That's
what I want. But to understand, like, oh, now, in
my life, I want to be a safe place for people,
you know what I mean now in my life, like
I want people to be able to be truthful and
be comfortable and be vulnerable and all the things, because
nobody is. I hate even when the term nobody's perfect
because it's so far away from what weir you know
(14:35):
what I mean, We're not, you know, Like, but it's
like there's something. It teaches me how to love people
and how to treat people and how to value them.
If you don't value them, you can't really love them.
But when, because of my relationship with God, when I
see every person I walk into a room with like like,
you know, all of us are made up of vibrations, right,
(14:56):
I was talking about this the other day. Down to
an atomic level, sub atomic level, we are actually made
up of sound, which is crazy because for me, you
hear like God spoke. Right. So then when I can
walk into a room and I can look at everybody
like while you're actually the vibrating voice of God, of
love itself, the source of love. Like, then even if
(15:17):
I'm mad at you, I still got to treat you
with respect and treat you differently, you know what I mean,
Like I have to walk with honor. So that relationship
with love has really taught me how to love myself,
which is still a process, and how to love you know,
other people and not deal with them out of their
issues are my issues, but like their inherent value, you.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Yes, Yeah, so that's definitely a very interconnected.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Thing for sure. Yes, And that is that's the Journey's
that's the journey for sure.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
Yes, Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Especially like what I'm hearing and what you're saying, it's like,
no matter what's happening, extending dignity to every being.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
One hundred percent of you. Absolutely absolutely, And I think
just it's just it's hard because life gets hard, you
know what I'm saying, life, you're way heavily like. But
I think when you can, like you said, see people's
inherent value and understand that everybody is going through something,
you know what I mean, then I think it Oddly enough,
(16:18):
people look at it as like, oh, you're just letting
people off the hook, and like it actually frees you
right yourself, you know, so you kind of can walk
around with a little bit even if you frustrate, you
have a little bit more peace because it's like this
isn't a foreign thing, like we're all kind of dealing
with these things.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
You know. Yeah, it's so powerful to say that because,
as you said, life is challenging. Yeah, also by design.
Yeah's exactly right. You've got to make it to heaven.
Why are we in heaven now?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Yeah? And this idea is like I always have this
the phrase. I always think about this phrase all the time.
The gold is refined in fire, like it is purified
and made beautiful and perfect, and this beautiful, amazing thing
through fire, you know what I mean. So yeah, yeah,
it's definitely hard, you know what I mean. So, like
you said, having just patience and grace and understanding with
people and look at them based on the value not
(17:07):
their stuff, you know what I'm.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
Saying, And like the bigger stories that are at play
just about like our absolute activity and everything is refined
in relationship.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yes, for sure, absolutely that is so. So you're great.
This is a great way to come to work. I
was like, why do I have the coded places? I
love it here we're in the area. What's your favorite
song on the album? Oh? Okay, so that changes all
the time. It depends, Yeah, it depends on but I
think one of my favorite songs on the album pretty
(17:41):
consistently is nervous. It's a song called Nervous. Yeah, I
really really love that song because I I initially wrote
it for women, right, you know what I mean, Because
there is this thing that happens when you're a woman,
especially when you're standing in your power, you know what
I mean, where it's like all of these weird narratives
to well, women will take over women as also like
(18:03):
they might, but who care? You know what I mean?
Who cares? Like and they do, but who cares? And
so it's this idea that it's like a woman standing
in her power is really threatening, right, you know what
I mean? And then as I was finishing the song,
I'm realizing, I'm like, this applies to everyone. Everyone standing
in their power can be feel threatening to someone or
feel you know. But there's it's like this idea that
(18:25):
it's like the colonization mentality, right, you know, you have
something that's so powerful and it's influential, and instead of
me receiving it, you know, and being blessed by it
the way I was intended to, now I need to
sort of colonize it, control it and suppress it and
all the things. Whereas like and why because of fear
because it makes us uncomfortable. You as a woman standing
in your power, as a person of color, standing as
(18:47):
a queer person standing in your power makes people uncomfortable.
But the truth is we're not meant to be comfortable,
you know what I mean. So it's like there's this
idea that like we might be, but likes people say,
blocking our a blessing is trying to suppress someone else's
whatever that thing is, whatever that power is, as opposed
to being like it's supposed to make you uncomfortable because
(19:09):
it's designed to grow you, you know what I mean.
So it's like it's like a system, like you said
at play, that we miss because we're too busy trying
to get comfortable, and that's not how we're designed to be.
I don't think you know what I mean. So yeah,
that's why that's so good.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Yeah, that's so good, especially in this day and age.
Like it's so deep because in this day and age,
especially as we're being like equipped with different like language
and understandings, right, Like, people are very hyper aware of.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Their triggers, right right, Yes.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
And you know there is this kind of thing happening
where it's it's about having boundaries and not getting triggered.
And it's like, no, no, you're supposed to get triggered. Yeah,
some things are supposed to trigger you. Yeah, it's not
about like insulating yourself and staying away from all the
trigger because like, yes, exactly, Oh you're triggered investigated.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Yeah, that'd be with it. Yeah, that's the interesting thing.
And I'm like, even in this discovery of like boundaries
and now and how they can be good, but it's
also a part of that discovery is that like, yeah,
the boundaries I'm discovering that are good, aren't boundaries meant
to keep me safe and protected and locked in this
da da da. There are certain boundaries that go, hey,
some things are are antithetical to my growth into my
(20:18):
path and to my purpose, or they're just simply not
for me, you know what I mean. So the boundaries
are more about creating a lane rather where you're growing
and as opposed to creating a box, you know what
I mean. So it's like I agree with you, You're right,
there's this very like it seems like self care has
become like just be calm all the time, you know
what I mean, or just just you know, be comfortable.
(20:39):
Like you said, have all these boundaries be locked in,
be safe? Da da da. But you're right, like agreed,
we're not supposed to be growth it becomes is an
uncomfortable thing, you know what I mean. It's not comfortable
for our baby's bones to be stretching and growing it,
you know what I mean. Like, so it's kind of
like that idea that like, yeah, self care isn't just
(21:00):
and also safety is I'm one of those people that
believes like the idea that like, Okay, I found the
box where I'm safe and all the stuff. It's a
little bit of a facadey, you know what I'm saying,
like like.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
So, yeah, I agree, what's performance? What's hyper vigilance? And
what is like exactly, God, that is so so, so
so good, And it's just you know what you're speaking to.
It's like that multifaceted feeling approach. It isn't meant to
be peace. I tell people all the time, I go to.
Speaker 2 (21:30):
Rage rooms like right, spend money to break stuff? Right,
Yeah exactly. I haven't gone yet. I actually really want
to try that. Who where we just I think I
was just talking about it with some star Thos people
on that couch. So that's why we have a girl
studio today. We're a bunch of beautiful, wonderful women. Also, no,
(21:50):
I haven't tried one of those yet. You've been to one?
Oh my god, I want to try it. I really
want to go.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Yeah, I've been sacred rage. Yes, we have to let
ourselves be everything. And it's like that this idea of
bypassing and just coming to peace. I'm not going to recommend.
I don't know what you've been through. You might need
to release a lot of stuff. Absolutely, I agree, but yeah,
I'll give you the details.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
Yeah, okay, I'm gonna check it out.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
A really cool experience. Like you go into this room.
You have like a mask and all this stuff, and
then you can put on your own music, and you
have a clock for however much time, and they bring
you this box full of all this breakable stuff.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I love it, old electronics.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Dishes, porcelain, and they give you a bat and they
give you a crowbar. I'm going in like the first
time you do it. The first time I threw it,
I was like, oh my gosh, ah, like you know,
and you're like, you know, it's kind of broken. You're
like okay, and the next thing, it's like I'm throwing
(22:51):
stuff in there, crowbar like a bat, like just going
love that.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I agree, we do have to get it out, you
know me absolutely.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
Deeply well, and your huge starring debut as one of
jess the most iconic figures in history and musical history
and civil rights history. Yes, Billie Holiday, this movie was
(23:29):
so heavy. It was incredible. You were phenomenal, you fanomal
But the layers of it, right, Like, it's like one
obviously the layers of racism, but then the layers of pain,
black pain, black woman pain, how we pacify ourselves, and
(23:52):
then also like mistreatment and manipulation and love like that
was so striking to me, how every man she fell
in love with was incredibly unsafe for her.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
One hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Yeah, what kind of toll did this role take on
your spirit?
Speaker 2 (24:12):
It's so a I'm so glad you were able to
kind of see all of that, you know, because that
is that's a conversation and it's a really hard conversation
for black women and for women of color to have,
right you know what I mean, It's because it's sort
of like this idea that like don't talk about your
pain or your experiences. Like within the community, it's almost
like we have to be a monolith in order to
(24:33):
get over this hill in order. But I think that
healing is from the inside out, you know what I mean,
And we need to be able to everybody needs to
have their space to express, you know, because that was
a huge thing that was I think one of the
things that probably stuck with me the most about her
person and playing her was the relationships. It absolutely affected
(24:54):
my real life relationships really and I definitely I was
in one for four years that I lost, you know
when I when I came out because I was it
was just this need to be loved and validated. It
was so deep. But you can imagine being a black
woman in the thirties and the forties is just like
no one loves you, right, you know what I mean.
And then what you were forced to accept like Billy
(25:16):
did as love is truly abuse, abuse in its most
pure form, you know. And that's the thing the only
use your clips one hundred percent, like mental, the emotional,
the fabsolutely ravages before even any of the physical. All
of that that robbing you of your piece, you know
what I mean. But as a black woman, during that time,
(25:37):
It's like, well, I'd rather take this little nugget of nothing,
that's a teeny bit of affection wrapped in a whole
bunch of abuse, because where else am I going to
get it from, you know what I mean. So that
need and that instant gratification taking whatever, for sure permeated
my life, you know what I mean. That definitely became
(25:57):
a part of kind of how I was moving, you
know what I mean. I don't think I really realized
it as much until later, you know, because I was
still in it, and you know, there's a lot of things.
I mean, playing Billy first of all, I want to
say that, like working with Lee and working with Tasha
and that cast was just one of the greatest experiences
(26:18):
in my life. But being her was really one of
the greatest experiences in my life. I really loved loved
being her. You know. There was just such an unhinged
kind of bravery and fear, and everything felt heightened, Everything
felt so much more urgent everything. You know that by
the time I flew back and landed in LA it
(26:38):
was just like being at an airport was the was
like worst viewing because I was just like, what is
the point this is so, like, you know what I mean,
was the point of all this? What is important about this?
What are we? So I will say that, you know.
And then so there were really great ways that she
impacted me, and then there were ways that were harder,
Like I said, in love and in relationships, it's hard
(27:00):
to find like my grounding, you know, kind of my
delibrium again, but I will say that, like, I think
what helped me a my relationship with God is what
helped me right, relationship with the Lord and I. One
of the things was realizing that like instead of trying
(27:23):
to figure out, Okay, wow, I just went through this
insane thing for years and now I got to get
back to who I was and function exactly how it was.
It was impossible, you know what I mean. So I
spent two years trying to figure out that that's actually
not what I'm supposed to do. And God really like
got to hold me and was like, hey, you were
supposed to be grown by this, you were supposed to
be changed by this experience.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Let's get rid of some of the bad stuff and
some of the negative stuff, some of the talks of
things and let's but keep the things that are supposed
to make you who you are for this season. Had
you not done this movie, well, how had you not
played her and connected with her so deep, I would
not be prepared for whatever it is that's laid out
for me in this season. So wow, that really helped.
It definitely changed me some ways good, some ways really
(28:09):
really rough because I felt all of her anxiety and
her pain and her fight. But then I realized, oh,
I needed to feel that so that I could be
prepared for everything that's coming up. So in a lot
of good ways too, you know.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
My goodness, I can really imagine, Yeah, I can really imagine.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
It feels like her life does not feel like I
was saying this earlier. I was like, doesn't feel like
I was, doesn't feel like memories of a movie set.
Right when I leave here, I'll remember when we were
on set and the lights and the moment that we
had and the genuineness of our But I will remember
all of the you know, hey, great, this was a
great interview, with great conversation to great and with playing
(28:53):
her for such a long time, it's like sometimes I
was getting mixed up the memories of my life and
hers because it just kind of felt like life memories,
you know what I mean. So it was she has
that much weight to her, Like she really has that
much weight to her. It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
There are so many places I want to take this
kud I love it.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
I love it. I love it. You're so great.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
I'm like, oh my god, because I jet Oh god,
I can just imagine like the kind of existential crisis
that that can really submerge you in, and you even saying,
you know, being in that experience of and then you
exit this portal, this different reality that you're existing in
and you're at the airport. Wa shodnt.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
People do human things and it's very normal and there's
nothing wrong with what they're living their life, you know
what I mean. But you're almost I'm not gonna lie.
I think when I landed, I was as I was
flying over into the city, I didn't like it and
like the way it was looking, you know, I was
flying back to LA I got to the airport and
I was kind of angry at people, you know what
I mean, Like, but I didn't realize how much of
(29:54):
that was sort of a chip on my shoulder from
living because here's the thing. We filmed the movie for
September to December. We were there for four months, right,
which four months doesn't seem like a long time, except
that I had been preparing for since the end of
twenty seventeen. So it was like the last part of
latter part of twenty seventeen, all of twenty eighteen, all
(30:17):
of twenty nineteen, all of twenty twenty because we had
to do pickup shoots and all that stuff too, and
then we started the pressing promo one in twenty twenty one.
So it's like, that's four years of like and in
the pandemic, and the pandemic hits, and so it's like,
now you're locked inside and you're which I can't I
still can't tell if that was the isolation of it
was better or worse, because I don't know that I
(30:37):
would have been ready to be very submerged in just
the hustle and mustle of people and daily life. So
I don't know, but it was. But it was four
years of being another person, you know what I mean.
So I think that's when everything starts to come to
you're like, oh, you know. There was such an urgency
to her life every day that felt like I was
(30:57):
really lacking when I got to mine, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
Wow, Wow, it's just so deep, it's so heavy, it's
so much.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
You feel her for sure, Yeah, do.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
You feel like spiritually did you feel like her presence
with Oh?
Speaker 2 (31:15):
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
It's funny. We actually had a dream, he had a
dream about her the last few days of filming, you
know what I mean, And she was getting into a cab.
She cussed in him about something and then she was
but she was happy with what we were doing, you
know what I mean. But that was one of the
things we used to say. We were sort of like,
if Billy's happy is she's not like, oh, you did
great and good for you guys. She's probably cussing you out,
(31:39):
you know what I'm saying, and like whatever. But I
absolutely felt her presence. And it's funny because my acting
coach would say something, she knows that I was a believer,
and so she would pray for me and pray over me,
and then we would talk about checking into the Billy dream, right,
you know what I mean, the life. And it's funny
because I was like, and it wasn't until this movie
that I was like, you know as a like there's
(32:00):
like there's different things that you think, you know what
I mean about different things, Okay. And it wasn't until
this movie that I discovered this scripture that was like
talking about how we that we do tap in with
what's called like the cloud of witnesses, like people, our ancestors,
people who came before us that have passed on and
we're allowed to tap and they're allowed to tap us
and all that stuff. I was like, wow, that must
(32:21):
be what that is and was because it was very
like it's weird again. Like I said, it's not necessarily
like feeling her. It was just being her, if that
makes sense, you know what I mean. She stepped in. Yeah,
So it didn't feel like it was like, oh my gosh,
I feel her super perwered. It was just kind of
like whoever I was, I felt like that's who to me,
(32:45):
felt like that's who's that was her, you know what
I mean? That was the person in the vessel and
the presence, And I loved it. It was a ride.
It was a ride because she's actually hell of fun,
you know what I mean, Like she's really fun. She's
definitely crazy, but like she's for sure shot out. You know,
I always think about this, like I think that our
(33:07):
mentality of people right on this side of the generation
we go right, we have our pillars are Maya Angelous,
who just like you know, have elevated you know, almost
a sainthood, and like you know, but then I think
about people in Billy's time when I read her, you know,
bio and I just spent time as her. And then
I read about someone like Maya Angelo writing about Billy Oliday.
(33:29):
And there's a story Maya tells her son very fondly
all the time, and she told her son how she
was performing at a club one time and she was
singing it. Billy was in the club with glasses on,
and this is her health had very seriously deteriorated by
this point time. But nobody cusses out may Angelou because
who does that, right, you know what I'm saying, But
like if you came from a different era, in a
(33:49):
different time. She tells the story about how she was
in a club singing and she got sunglasses on. She
has a moved, She's chainsmoking the entire time, and then
all of a sudden, Maya's singing and did all stuff
and Billy jumps up and she's just like, shut that
bitch up. I was like, oh my god, there's just
certain things you read were and then when you're connected
(34:10):
to her, right, I was like Bally, not by her,
but to her at the time, it was just like
she was the biggest and she had all of this
other stuff going on in her face. But may when
she explained the stories she said, Billy went off and
she said, shut that bitchup. She sounds like my mother,
and everybody's like, what is happening right now? And then
all of a sudden, she gets really insecure because everyone's
(34:31):
looking out, so she runs into the bathroom. Maya runs
in after her. She was like, you know, and she
said she saw somebody who was really hurt and broken,
and she kind of took her glasses off and she
looked at her and then she said, you see all
those people out there clapping when you said my name,
and make says yeah, you know what I mean. Basically,
they're just she's like says something along the lines, and
they're just excited to see a train wreck like a junkie.
(34:53):
You know what I'm saying. It's really interesting, Like she
she has such this crazy spirit you know what I mean,
definitely experienced it and felt it, and I very very
much love this woman like she my can and myself
and my you know what I mean. So yeah, wow
for sure. But it's like who cusses on my stock?
You know what I mean? Like, I'm from a whole
(35:15):
different side of this era, you know, National Treasure, treasure,
that's just like but you hear those stories and you go, wow,
this was a different thing we were talking about and
dealing with at the time, you know what I mean. Oh, God,
bless her, God bless her absolutely, God bless her soul
for sure.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
Last question, when I hear a voice like yours, especially
like especially on Rise Up, I don't even know how
this question needs to come out. I guess I'm just
curious about your response.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
But now I'm very very clo.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
You're one. I mean, you just have an exquisite voice.
Speaker 2 (35:53):
It's so thank you, thank you, so beautiful, but it's.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
So invocative and like your voice, the healing I hear
in your voice is the fact that like you can
hear emotion process through it as you sing to something,
which includes like hearing sometimes the ache, right hearing the pain,
hearing the pull like I feel like I hear the
(36:18):
stretching of growth in your voice, and I'm just so curious,
like how it's always been your voice? Yeah, so how
does that interplay with your artistry? Like did you always
know you were kind of designed to sing deeper songs?
Because this isn't a voice for silly songs, right, Like,
this isn't.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
A voice I love for like not right not in
my head. They're so funny. My team is so funny
and truly crazy, a petty out and hot talking about here.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
This isn't a voice for j just like singing simple
silly things like this is a voice to make people
feel And I'm just curious how you experience that or
how you how that influenced you, especially as you were
growing up, coming into the voice, coming into the songwriting.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
Yeah, that's a really good question. Wow, And thank you
for saying that so much. Thank you, thank you. You know,
I will say I think that the process, it was
a process, right, you know, Like, and to be honest
with you, that's most of the time I'm saying silly,
stupid stuff most like, I get it all out. I
feel like in life when I'm talking with like friends
(37:23):
and family, and joking with them. It's always dumb stuff.
Like I did an interview. Have you heard of the scene?
You know Judith Hill by the way, you should definitely,
oh God, would you would absolutely love her? She is
you would love her? Okay, well, she's one of my
closest friends ever. But we crack up laughing because people
always ask us. I think they think that our conversations
are always very, very deep, and they are. They are
in the sense that, like, she's also a believer too,
(37:44):
so like we literally spend time in fellowship and like
praying and worshiping and in the Word and studying and edifying.
We do do that. But when it comes to music
and all, it's like her and I literally talk about
dumb things all the time. It's like you need the
to be able to turn your brain off sometimes and
other people. So anyway, I was saying that to say
(38:04):
that I spent a lot of time doing dumb things,
but I need an outlet, you know what I mean.
But I think even musically, you know, it's interesting because
it was a journey. It was a journey to accepting
my voice. First of all, I didn't like it because
I didn't like the tone it's super brassy, and I'm
just like ew Like sometimes I'm like, who's gonna like
(38:25):
like this? Like this right? You know what I mean?
That's what it sounds like to me sometimes. But I
will say part of the reason I love Billy is
because it is her artistry that helped me accept my voice.
Like I was introduced to her at the age eleven,
and it was her artistry and her voice that helped
me accept my own. Because there's a clip of her
speaking about her own singing voice and she says, you know,
(38:47):
because people alway say, well, she didn't have much of
a ray, and she didn't have she wasn't unaware of
these things. Like she was just like, yeah, it doesn't
do too much. My voice goes up a little bit,
comes down a little bit, but it's my voice. You
really like it or you don't, you know what I mean.
And so her stand and that was one of the
most influential things I'd ever heard or you know, because
I was like, wow, okay, you know, instead of trying
(39:08):
to before it was like these singers who I wanted
to sound like and sing like and all these things.
Then with her, it was like, oh, I want to
do my thing, you know what I mean, the way
she did her things. So she really helped to empower
me in that way, right, And so it was a
process of accepting my voice. And it's really interesting. I
don't think it was ever a moment that I was like, hey,
(39:28):
my voice is meant to do powerful things and to
be powerful and all. I think it just I mean,
I'm just a prayerful person, you know what I'm saying.
And I think when I really like well as what
I say was like probably in like later twenties, when
I kind of like gave my life back to Christ,
gave my life to that, then that prayer and how
(39:53):
I impact people became intentional, you know what I'm saying.
And so it was almost it's sort of inadver certainly
happened that it happened to be on serious things and
happened to be kind of a place of testimony, a
place of reflection because I just singing from a real
place of like pain or like desire or growth or
(40:14):
you know. So honestly, I can't even say that I
crafted it and was like, oh, yes, I want to
do just serious things happened to grab my attention, like
you know, even when things comes to ability, like hearing
strange fruit and knowing what she sacrificed for that, Like
that mattered to me, you know what I mean, hearing
the weight of like people my mother's own. When I
(40:34):
think of my mom and her own story of survival,
I'm like, WHOA. Like it changed the way I looked
at her, the way all the stuff that used to
annoying me became things that I was like, Wow, I
really admire you, Like that's not you just getting by
this youth thriving. Like So, I don't know, those things
just mattered to me, And so I think what happened
is that inadvertently that made its way into the music,
(40:57):
you know what I mean. Yeah, So I don't know
that it was really a place. It just as your
person develops, I think, like I said, if you being
authentic and present, then I think your artistry develops, you
know what I mean. So I think that's kind of
how that's a good question. She drew. She was like,
we're going in here. I'm not staying up here. You're
gonna do that for your other interviews. We're going here
(41:17):
and we're going into the room. Okay, Oh wow, you're
so amazing to talk to you, by the way, thank you, likewise.
Speaker 1 (41:29):
Likewise deeply well. At the end of every show, I
invite our guests to share a little bit of like homework,
soul work is what I call it, so that as
everyone hears the show, they can spend the week till
the next episode integrating.
Speaker 2 (41:50):
I love that. So that can be like a.
Speaker 1 (41:51):
Practice or even a journal prompt or just a quote
a thought you'd like to leave everyone with to kind
of savor for the next week.
Speaker 2 (42:00):
Oh okay, okay, you know what I'll do. Actually, this
has kind of been like the theme of the album,
so it actually works, you know what I mean. It's
not a shameless plug. This actually works.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
But it is in stores now. Castra No.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
One of the things on my record, like you know,
is that's why there's themes of like in the artwork.
There's SAMs of desert and there's seams of water. There's
a place it's called Cherif because Cherith is a scriptures
called in scripture, it's called the brook Cherit, which is
it means to cut away or the place of isolation,
and it's where God brought the prophet Elijah to fill
(42:36):
him up, you know. What I mean, drink water from
the brook. I will command the birds to bring you
bread and meat. He went empty, he went completely empty,
but everything he needed he had, you know what I mean,
to prepare him for his mountaintop moment. So I'm examining
in life. I think we walk around often walk living
life from a place of black. You know what I mean.
We're not enough, we don't have, we are less than.
(42:58):
And it's funny because even the most empowered of us,
that thought will creep its way and it will find
you know, yeah, and we really you know, I think
about we were talking about this the other day, the
scripture where God said it is finished, like we really
were created, Like you are a whole, complete, incredible work
and the only one of your kind, incredibly valuable. So
(43:19):
like I think the homework thing would be like. And
that's one of the themes for the album. I'm on
this journey, as you said, and I want people to
go on it with me, but to try choosing your
One of the things I say is believe the things
that God says about you and not the things that
like people or society or your own self doubt says
(43:40):
about you. Because you need to be in a place
of lack to consume, right, So am I say believe
the try living each day conscious of like believing the
things God says about you, which is you are fully,
fully loved and desired, you know what I mean? Because
that's a big thing. Like we're like, yeah, we know
we're loved, but I want to be one to we're
(44:00):
desired and we're are loved and that you absolutely have
everything you need. So I'm kind of looking at the
album like, what does it look like to live life
truly from a place of abundance versus a place of
black What does it look like if I walk every
day going like I have everything I need in here
and in community, Like because there's something crazy about the
(44:22):
fact that all of us exist in this time and
have linked up and met, you know what I mean? Like,
so to walk through each day this week and each
moment this week conscious of the fact that, like you
have been given and blessed with every single thing that
you need, the people, the community, da da da? How
does that change the way you approach things? I got
to get money from this person, da dada, as opposed
(44:42):
to Oh, I've I have a cameraman sitting right next
to me. I have a psalm, you know what I mean?
You have everything you need in yourself, in your community,
like spending the week in each moment. Whenever you feel
like I'm not enough, I don't have enough. I need this,
I need to consume. Let that thought process change to
like I have been blessed with every single thing that
I need everything, Like, how does that change the wain
(45:04):
we approach? So I would say, that's.
Speaker 1 (45:05):
The week's homework is that was gorgeous teaching.
Speaker 2 (45:09):
Yeah, it was so beautiful. That's a really good segment.
I love that. I love it here never I'm not
leave it.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Andre Day, thank you so much for joining us. Cassandra
is in stores now, in stores that's so outdated. That's
such an outdate, right.
Speaker 2 (45:27):
No worried. I love our virtual stores and UV stores y'all.
Speaker 1 (45:32):
Open your phone, get to Apple, right but I know
like there's even CD stores like right right for sure,
but still cute, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
So the record the vinyl will be out at some point, y'all,
just don't there's a few people cut my head off
about it were coming. Thank you so much for thank you,
thank you, bless you, thank you, thank God, bless God,
bless you to thank you. It's not misday.
Speaker 1 (45:59):
The content for presented on Deeply Wells serves solely for
educational and informational purposes. It should not be considered a
replacement for personalized medical or mental health guidance and does
not constitute a provider patient relationship. As always, it is
advisable to consult with your healthcare provider or health team
(46:19):
for any specific concerns or questions that you may have.
Connect with me on social at Debbie Brown. That's Twitter
and Instagram, or you can go to my website Debbie
Brown dot com. And if you're listening to the show on.
Speaker 2 (46:33):
Apple Podcasts, don't forget.
Speaker 1 (46:35):
Please rate, review, and subscribe and send this episode to
a friend. Deeply Well is a production of iHeartRadio and
The Black Effect Network. It's produced by Jacquess Thomas, Samantha
Timmins and me Debbie Brown. The Beautiful Soundbath You Heard
That's by Jarrelen Glass from Crystal Cadence. For more podcasts
(46:56):
from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app or where however you
listen to your favorite shows.
Host
Devi Brown
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