Faith over fear

Drew is the last gay guy on the planet to find out about lattes, Enya broke sobriety with Ozempic and Ky messed up badly

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:18):
Bad back in better. Well, it's bad. I feel so
far away from you today because you're not sitting on
my lap.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Yeah, we were so close last year.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
I'm honestly glad we're not doing that again this week
because you were like overheating my body, like.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
I already over I've been running hot recently.

Speaker 1 (00:36):
I think since I started taking SSRRIS and abusing marijuana. Like,
I'm just like, my body is overheated forever. And that's
the part I'm willing to pay for, like my body.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
And you have you picked a rehab yet?

Speaker 2 (00:46):
No, No, don't passages in Malibu.

Speaker 3 (00:49):
Those episodes are going to go crazy in the rehab.

Speaker 1 (00:52):
I'll let us do episodes in rehab.

Speaker 3 (00:54):
They take your phones away.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
We'll fly in a drone. Yeah, and we'll have like
MIC's magnetic mics, who's we.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
You don't have to go with me if I'm go
on rehab, it's a solo journey.

Speaker 2 (01:07):
No, I'm going to fucking rehabit.

Speaker 1 (01:09):
I'm never going to rehab rehab. See what's crazy is
there was like a pocket of artists that because I
was being personally affected by the opioid epidemic, any artist
that was outwardly going through addiction genuinely affected me in
a way that I don't understood.

Speaker 2 (01:31):
It was so real for me, I like fully.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
Like, holy, this ship gets outside of these four walls.

Speaker 2 (01:36):
I didn't fully grasp like what it meant for an
artist to go to rehab or a celebrity to rehab,
but I knew that it was bad and it would
affect my mood for the week, like it would it
would ruin my mind.

Speaker 1 (01:51):
I was like actively partaking in a household where I
was a child, and I understood like what it meant
for someone to disappear into rehab, like literally like that,
like having that and then knowing because it's like, it's
that fucking serious bitch, like Demi posting on Facebook that
she was in rehab.

Speaker 4 (02:09):
It's that fucking serious bitch, Like the day I remember
so clear.

Speaker 1 (02:15):
Like also, if you're wondering why I'm wearing glasses, a
lot of people I know have been like overly talking
about the wrinkles in their face, and I've been like
now looking at my own, especially because like people online
are so crazy and you're so used to seeing the
beauty filter and like botox, like literally everyone has botox.

(02:35):
I am a purist in the only sense that I
have had no medical work done. And it's not out
of any reason of thinking I'm better. It's literally one,
I think I'll be the the test dummy who goes wrong.

Speaker 2 (02:47):
You're the murder.

Speaker 1 (02:47):
Yeah, I'll be the murder because every like cosmetic thing
I've ever gotten done has gone wrong. And Two, I'm
too lazy. I can't even go to the doctor, Like
I can't even get myself to like right, I mean
ozembic doesn't count ye ozembic.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
No.

Speaker 1 (03:04):
But I don't take it. Everybody takes it for like
the weight thing. I've literally go back. I've said this before.
I take it because it gives me a high something
in the chemical and I don't work because where are
you supposed to put it?

Speaker 2 (03:14):
Also, I take it for the dementia Alzheimer's effects, well,
because it clears.

Speaker 1 (03:21):
It gives you like a clear mind now and sure
brain fog, dementia, whatever they want to call it, it's
going to like hurt me later from the other.

Speaker 2 (03:29):
Also, I don't put my own No, no, it makes
it better.

Speaker 1 (03:31):
Oh it makes it better.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
Yeah, Oh good, thank god.

Speaker 1 (03:33):
I put it in my almost like I kind of
treat it like an epidural, like I get between a
spinal cord and that's where I put my ozembic. I
can't believe people are really stabbing themselves.

Speaker 2 (03:46):
It's gonna be me with steroids.

Speaker 1 (03:48):
Oh just cut yourself in starf like if you're that
fucking desperate.

Speaker 3 (03:51):
But I was diagnosed with a fat penis, so I
have to take it for that.

Speaker 2 (03:54):
Oh that's uh.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
What were we talking about before that?

Speaker 2 (03:57):
Demi Lovato rehab?

Speaker 1 (03:58):
Oh yeah, oh my god, I remember that where I
was when he like her Facebook was updated with her
location and that she was okay, but she was in rehab,
and the tabloids were right. I was at like my
dad's girlfriend's house at the time, and like she had
a daughter who's like sixteen, And this had to have

(04:19):
been when I was like ten or eleven, and me
and my sister were watching Gorilla's videos and then my
like my dad's girlfriend's daughter came in the room. But
she was like my like, I'm just gonna refer to
her as my sister, like my stepsister coming. She was like,
oh my god, cause she knew I didn't have Facebook,
Like I was too little to have Facebook in my face.
But also she knew that. I was like tapped in,

(04:41):
Like I got home from school and the news was
going in, Like where's the news?

Speaker 2 (04:46):
The news in the media, that's what I've been talking about.

Speaker 1 (04:49):
I got home from school and I wanted to know
what was happening on my block. I was like, I
will know absolutely right now, what is happening in my city.
Debbie Lovato was a part of the conversation shit and
she updated me. And I remember going and I remember
the picture or like the post, and I remember the room.
I remember like I remember it all too well, like

(05:11):
I feel like Taylor Swift.

Speaker 2 (05:13):
Like the version of that for me was Charlie Sheen.

Speaker 1 (05:16):
Whlie talk about Charlie Sheen.

Speaker 2 (05:19):
Yes, because Two and a Half Men was on my
TV all day, not because I wanted to, but because
I was forced to watch with that demographic, yeah exactly,
and that like that whole arc was like like probably
the biggest pop culture moment in my life, like winning
like all of that ship like that was special, like

(05:39):
that I remember, we need something like that. Should we
do that? Should we be the ones that like lose?

Speaker 1 (05:43):
I mean I feel like people view us like that,
Like Charlie Sheen was viewed as a piece of shit
drug addict. And now I guess, oh sue me like
me too, nothing whatever, So that I am kind of
in my Charlie Sheen a bit.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
But yeah, Charlie Sheen, Charlie Sheen. Oh I didn't listenab.

Speaker 1 (06:01):
I couldn't listen to Amy rest in peace. I couldn't
listen to Brittany, like I didn't have like a Brittany
or like an Amy phase growing up, because like they
were so in the news as like women with mental
illness and drug abuse. So I was like, Okay, I'm
turning on the TV to not think about my mom.
I don't need to see my mom on TV, Like

(06:22):
I don't want that. So I didn't like listen to them.
But I can't think of anybody as of recent.

Speaker 2 (06:26):
Aaron Carter did he not writer Ben a Flack Eminem.

Speaker 1 (06:34):
Okay, but see now the problem is everyone's on drugs?
To everyone? Does that make sense? I'm like this list
is like.

Speaker 2 (06:40):
Everyone is on drugs. It's really really fucking crazy.

Speaker 1 (06:44):
I mean everyone is on drugs. Also because it is
insane how many people are like just not sober any
waking moment. Because I I personally this is me personally,
I consider like SSRIs and stuff not being sober because
I'm like that is like really to me, like so
because I'm like, these are medicines I pick up and

(07:05):
literally on the bottle. It's screaming at me that like
my vivans may disrupt how I drive.

Speaker 2 (07:13):
The fuck Like well, yeah, viavans is like a controlled substance,
but like.

Speaker 1 (07:18):
An SSR, Yeah, it's controlled as fuck. I can't get
the shit over the counter. It's controlled to me the
fuck I can't instacart it. I gotta go off and
like beg a pharmacy to give me an SSRI so
I don't kill myself Like they're like, oh we ran
out everyone. Everyone's on the kill themselves drugs now, Like no,
it's not. No one is sober. I've not met a
single person who is like sober, but I guess I have,

(07:41):
like I've been infected by like straight edge mind people
and like, to me, I kind of do agree with
that though, but I guess I agree to me, like, oh,
don't claim sober if you have caffeine pumping through your blood,
Like I don't give a fuck. You're not sober, You're
a meth head. You're like your level one meth head.
It's like when you first open up four and for
the new season, Caffeine is the box they give you.

Speaker 2 (08:04):
Yeah, caffeine is the real gateway drug, y'all. I'm like,
I'm finally starting to see the vision. Like I've been
like anti coffee, like for.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
Last gay guy on the planet to find out about No.

Speaker 2 (08:17):
Literally, I like I've been very like, no, I don't
need that shit. I've drank a coffee a day at
least maybe even two for the last like week and
a half. I really really really it's special, Like I
drink two SIPs and I get lifted to a plane
of existence that like I feel like I literally just

(08:38):
did coke, Like it's crazy, Like I literally love that shit. Also,
I did coke when I was sixteen, so I don't
know what like it feels like now, but like a.

Speaker 3 (08:46):
Seventh grader talking about coffee, I know that sounds like.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
Also, we have to keep in mind he doesn't finish
any of these coffees, like not once it gets to
like about here, and.

Speaker 2 (08:58):
Then it's done well because by this in I'm like
I turn into a shell of a human being. I
like lock into this like plane of existence that like
literally like I feel like I'm living in silent Hill,
Like it's just like my I'm bug eyed. Like I
was talking about it with Inya yesterday, Like I was
driving like fucked up on coffee, and I was like,
this is it's actually making me a list.

Speaker 1 (09:18):
Is my point being proven or no? So state your
mind is completely I agree.

Speaker 2 (09:23):
This is this ship is like the heaviest drug.

Speaker 1 (09:25):
Talked to me before my coffee. You're sound a lot
like an alcoholic to me, like you're gonna get the
shakes and starts screaming.

Speaker 2 (09:32):
Literally the way people like react when they don't have
coffee in the morning is legitimately freaky.

Speaker 1 (09:37):
It's like is a drug, Like to me, caffeine is
a drug?

Speaker 2 (09:41):
Well no, that's that is like a common.

Speaker 1 (09:43):
Okay, So it's you're not sober. Ho you're at the
office tweaking off that pho. It's actually the weirdest email
I've ever seen.

Speaker 4 (09:51):
Bitch sober the fuck it Like you're tweaking good, but
but I don't think anybody is sober.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
Also like, well, I'm high on life, so like I'm
not sober.

Speaker 1 (10:07):
I'm high period.

Speaker 2 (10:09):
Actually whatever, the opposite of higa is on life. That's
what I am.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
I'm degrading from.

Speaker 2 (10:15):
Yeah, this, this life is beaten my ass. Yeah, but
it's only going to get better from here.

Speaker 1 (10:21):
No, Yeah, me or her, I have to choose one,
fuck you fuck yeah.

Speaker 2 (10:29):
I'm addicted to eating, munching on box.

Speaker 3 (10:33):
I'm an eater, and I have to go to rehab.
Also that whatever.

Speaker 1 (10:38):
You only need to go to rehab when you found
yourself a surplus, no in a surplus of the substance,
yearning for the substance versus having it. That's when you
go to rehab. You're battling your own demons.

Speaker 3 (10:53):
I'm eating so much. My doctor is a word I'm
gonna od.

Speaker 1 (10:57):
Oh. I never finished why I have these stupid fucking
glasses on one. I haven't had my scene glasses for
like four or five days, which I don't care because
like I genuinely don't give a shit, like what, I
don't do anything anyway.

Speaker 2 (11:12):
It's affecting my life, though, So you need to find them.

Speaker 1 (11:14):
Yeah, Because I can't drive.

Speaker 2 (11:15):
I literally have to drive her around everywhere. I'm her
little chauffeur. I drove us to and from Santa or
San Diego, which honestly, I love driving. I love driving, Like,
am I the only person that loves driving?

Speaker 1 (11:32):
You kind of do sound like a seven year old
who like got switched with an adult body sometimes, Like
I love coffee, I love driving, Like that's your vibe.

Speaker 2 (11:40):
No, like that coffee, Like I'm not kidding, Like I
literally thought I was gonna kill us. Like there were
moments where I had zero thoughts in my head and
I was like, oh, I don't want to feel like this,
Like I don't. I want this out of my body.
I want to piss this out. Also the way your
piss smells after drinking a cup of coffee, it's disgusting.
The way your mouth tastes, just like a tune of milth. No,
like the way your mouth tastes after drinking coffee. Like

(12:03):
you bitches are fucking freaks, because like this shit is disgusting,
Like I want it out of my mouth now.

Speaker 1 (12:09):
You literally eat the most cynogenic food the world has
to offer for breakfast, Like you don't, and you fall
asleep without brushing your teeth. Pretty talk to me about
taste in your fucking mouth, Poe.

Speaker 2 (12:22):
Don't even play in my fucking face right now, I
am a neurotic freak about my mouth.

Speaker 1 (12:28):
No, but you do knock out all dude.

Speaker 2 (12:30):
You're like I brush my teeth every single time. No
matter what I brush my faceline, I can't.

Speaker 1 (12:36):
I literally get the simple task like brushing. It's like, Oh,
if someone said I don't shower, I'm not gonna be
like I shower every day. Oh, I'm wearing these stupid
glasses because I don't have my seeing glasses and without
something on my face, I will stay forever scrunching my eyebrows.
And yesterday, for the first time in a long time,

(12:57):
at the end of the day from like squinting and
I already make a lot of like rude faces naturally,
so I scrangched my eyebrows a lot yesterday. The indentation
down my forehead when we got home from being in
the car and me trying to look out the window
all day.

Speaker 3 (13:13):
I've never noticed any wrinkles on your face.

Speaker 1 (13:16):
To be honest, thank you.

Speaker 3 (13:21):
You're welcome.

Speaker 2 (13:22):
That was nice.

Speaker 3 (13:23):
That was nice.

Speaker 2 (13:24):
I did kind of. I didn't mean it to come
off as mean, but like I was taking pictures of you,
and I was like, stop throwing your brow because you
were like scowing you really.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
Dude, I just naturally, that's how. But also because I
don't have my glasses, like it's.

Speaker 2 (13:37):
Just before my glasses.

Speaker 1 (13:41):
But I'm never gonna get botox, like that can't that
can't be a thing.

Speaker 3 (13:44):
I'm gonna get it. I know.

Speaker 2 (13:46):
I kind of want to get it too.

Speaker 3 (13:47):
Let's go get it, Let's get I want to go.

Speaker 2 (13:49):
I also want to drive to Mexico City, not Mexico City.
I want to drive to Mexico And I want to
give people big bear hugs with testosterone gel and like
it gets on your skin and then you grow like
patches of like body hair in those spots are like
when you're sleeping in you, I'm gonna lather you and testosterone, Joe,
when you're like in bed next to me, and I'm

(14:09):
gonna dose you full of test It's gonna be awesome.
I'm gonna force transition you. What's the first thing you
would do if you woke up as a man.

Speaker 1 (14:20):
Kill myself? I would. I'm not kidding all fucking day.

Speaker 2 (14:24):
Well, that's not an option.

Speaker 1 (14:25):
I wake up in the body of a straight guy,
like ay.

Speaker 3 (14:28):
Straight this guy.

Speaker 1 (14:29):
Yeah, dude, I don't know. I'm gonna do fucking uber
deliveries and make sure that nobody says meat at the door.

Speaker 2 (14:37):
You don't want to be seen. I don't want that
picture of the girl like in the floor of her
tub screaming, Like when an uber delivery like knocks on
the door and won't drop your food off, and it's
like a fuck.

Speaker 1 (14:54):
That's even the idea of being seen. You know what
the original fantastic for when the guy gets turned into
the thing and he's like checking up on his gorgeous
wife and being a little freak in the bushes in
a trench coat. That would be me living in the
white sis straight guy's boy for a day. I would
want to see my friend and yearn for their love,
but I would never want to interrupt their livelihoods with

(15:16):
my presence.

Speaker 2 (15:17):
If I woke up a woman, I would I would
buy a gun because men are scary.

Speaker 1 (15:26):
I want a gun, I do, I do, But I
think I'd kill myself on like a weird day, Like
if I woke a feeling weird and then someone called
me or left me a stupid voicemail or a text,
or like called me in the middle of something important,
I would kill myself.

Speaker 2 (15:41):
Yeah, y'all won't let me buy a gun because you're
scared of what I'll do with it.

Speaker 1 (15:45):
Yeah, Also, like it's that and.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
It'll just be used against me. Someone will like break in.

Speaker 1 (15:52):
And if I'm being so honest, and I'm not saying
this because I feel the same way for me, because
I don't think you'd actually do something to yourself because
you live with people and you have common decency in
that respect. Not to say that people would kill themselves
with people present in the house, you know what, Like
you do what you gotta do, Like that's a different conversation,

(16:13):
but I don't think you would do that. I would
be more concerned if someone just getting to it before
you use it, because you've talked so many times about
how you like grabbed a knife and you'd' even hold
on to it for self protection measures. When that guy
came into the old apartment and broke in, you just
threw it back and the like to not even keep
the knife. He could have literally just and that's exactly

(16:35):
what would happen with the gun.

Speaker 2 (16:36):
No, I would blast someone away.

Speaker 1 (16:42):
No, I think I would kill myself with it, But
like not even and I don't mean that in like
a sad way and literally, just like I I my
like brain rests more in suicidal ideation just because that's
naturally like myself bringing like that. That is just like
that's the base of it. Like I talked to my
therapist about it. Don't fucking pity me. I'm almost thirty.
I'm fine, but like that's just where I live. And like,

(17:07):
I don't know, I think I would really get into
like even if someone just like made me annoyed and
I like I was, like, you pissed me off so bad,
I'm gonna shoot myself. Like I could see myself just
grabbing it out of boredom honestly and playing with it.

Speaker 2 (17:22):
Next the next conversation. Next, I think we need to
hit up nardwar about the Epstein list.

Speaker 3 (17:30):
Yeah, he's gonna he's gonna get to the bottom.

Speaker 2 (17:32):
I could figure that. Yeah. I think just the way
he like speaks to musicians and finds dirt on musicians,
I think he could find the Epstein list.

Speaker 1 (17:43):
What does he have war like.

Speaker 2 (17:48):
At autism?

Speaker 1 (17:49):
Oh yeah, but do you think like I I sometimes
I can't tell if he's like playing up a character,
if that's him, like what.

Speaker 3 (17:57):
I don't think he's I don't think it's a character.

Speaker 2 (17:59):
I think he's just that.

Speaker 1 (18:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (18:01):
I think he's probably leaning into his quirks.

Speaker 1 (18:05):
That seriously makes me so happy.

Speaker 3 (18:06):
Yeah, it's cute.

Speaker 1 (18:08):
Yeah, Nard war, Well, he's not going to expose the
Epstein list, because then who does he have left to interview?

Speaker 2 (18:15):
Clock. No, I've been in some freaky ass rooms, y'all.

Speaker 1 (18:27):
I'm hitting people. I don't give a ship like. I
am such a weird.

Speaker 2 (18:31):
The way Kai was just looking at Enya was insane.

Speaker 3 (18:35):
No, we're not going to do this.

Speaker 2 (18:36):
It was like he was falling in love.

Speaker 3 (18:39):
I wasn't.

Speaker 1 (18:39):
Falling in love falls so much deeper.

Speaker 2 (18:42):
That was crazy. I've never seen someone look at someone
like that before.

Speaker 3 (18:46):
I wasn't. I was just listening. She was saying something funny,
and I was laughing and smiling at it. It was funny.

Speaker 1 (18:52):
How long have you had that shirt?

Speaker 3 (18:54):
This is I've had my whole shirt for three years.

Speaker 2 (18:57):
I like that shirt on you.

Speaker 3 (18:58):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (18:58):
Yeah it's a good shirt.

Speaker 3 (19:00):
Yeah. I like the silhouette that it creates on my body.
Gives me an hour glass silhouette.

Speaker 2 (19:06):
Falls on your body like a six foot two, one
five pound skater boy with a size twenty six waist.

Speaker 3 (19:15):
Okay, yeah, the perfect body. Oh. Also, me Andrew went
to high mat and we worked out together.

Speaker 2 (19:19):
Oh my god. Yeah it was freaky. And we also
like posed in the mirror like we were.

Speaker 1 (19:25):
Like, you guys are like really the dance you guys
do with each other in this lifetime is genuinely amazing
to witness, Like.

Speaker 2 (19:35):
One day it'll happen, and like it's hint five ten years.

Speaker 3 (19:38):
It's gonna happen in six years. I genuinely feel that.

Speaker 2 (19:41):
I think, I think it's gonna be cool. We'll be
we'll both be caught at a low moment.

Speaker 3 (19:45):
Yeah, it'll be very low moment, but it'll be beautiful
and horrifying, like when two eagles come together and they
plummet towards.

Speaker 2 (19:51):
Oh they like locked hass they make spin down.

Speaker 3 (19:54):
And if they don't bust, they die.

Speaker 2 (19:57):
They hit the ground, and true will rise from the
ashes like a phoenix.

Speaker 3 (20:01):
Yes, we will bust. We will be busting.

Speaker 2 (20:03):
We will be busting.

Speaker 3 (20:05):
Me and Drew are going to try for it.

Speaker 2 (20:07):
Will be the first.

Speaker 3 (20:08):
We're gonna keep trying.

Speaker 2 (20:10):
And you are the girl.

Speaker 3 (20:15):
Yeah that's been established.

Speaker 1 (20:16):
I think the girl. And who's the boy.

Speaker 3 (20:19):
I'm the girl, I.

Speaker 1 (20:21):
Said, between me and Drew, you're so caught up in.

Speaker 3 (20:23):
Your fantasy, very self centered. I forgot, Uh, you're the boys.

Speaker 1 (20:29):
Yeah, I'm not kidding. That's like kind of my like
thing is when I.

Speaker 2 (20:32):
Like like the like feeling that gave you being called
the boy. It made you feel so good. I think
we need to look into that.

Speaker 1 (20:39):
No, actually it's like awful. I can't believe I've done
this to myself, Like.

Speaker 2 (20:45):
We need to explore that.

Speaker 1 (20:46):
Oh, that's so annoying in every right, I've gotten my
wish to be Like I.

Speaker 2 (20:51):
Just got gender euphoria from being called a girl. Loki,
I'm not even.

Speaker 1 (20:55):
You do you do yearn for like you yearn for
the practices and gets to partake in.

Speaker 2 (21:01):
Yeah, I want to be one of the girls so bad.
Like I watched It's complicated and like all of the
girls sitting around the living room like eating really yummy
food and just shit talking their partners. Like I will
never be able to do that because I will be
the partner being shit talked because I'm a straight man,
and my wife will be with her girls. But the

(21:27):
but no, no, no, I un ironically, un ironically, I
want to like be like a middle aged woman so bad.
I think that would be so fun.

Speaker 1 (21:37):
That's funny. Middle Aged women I think are like the
most saw after by serial killers and murderers.

Speaker 2 (21:43):
Exactly, bitch. At least I don't have to do it myself.

Speaker 1 (21:46):
What's cool about being a woman is every single year
of my life I'm a part of an awesome statistic.
It's just like literally, like do I want to be stabbed, raped,
or like pushed off a cliff more? It's like, depending
on my age, pushed.

Speaker 2 (22:01):
Off a cliff low key, it would be kind of
fun going down.

Speaker 1 (22:04):
What were we watching yesterday that someone got oh, we're
watching that show high Potential. Some one's tap dancing on
the roof and got pushed off, Like I'm not kidding.
Just now, I was like, was that real?

Speaker 3 (22:13):
Yeah, Josiah's gonna die.

Speaker 2 (22:16):
He's gonna be tap dancing, which one of us is
pushing him.

Speaker 3 (22:21):
It's just gonna be Hi, It's gonna be me.

Speaker 1 (22:25):
No, because it's me. It's me Josiah. Were the ones
tap dancing you're trying to solve with the murder you
killed Josie, I think the whole thing. I'm sorry to
spoil it if you're watching episode two, season one of
High Potential. But I think the whole spoiler is somebody's
Scott in his trunk and like followed them up and

(22:46):
meant to kill the other person. I was up for
a long time last night kind of damn.

Speaker 2 (22:51):
Yeah, Me and Bed, like Me and Bed went to India.
Me and Bed went to in yat like fucking ten
thirty last night. It was crazy.

Speaker 1 (22:58):
Me and Django went into bed Jenga.

Speaker 2 (23:03):
I miss you, Brian, Brian Colberger. Yeah, can we go
back this? Hi? Ti Matt No, Oh my god, I
think kaya is so fucking upset. I want to That
is my fault, though, That is my fault because I
made very big plans for all of us to hit.

Speaker 3 (23:23):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (23:23):
Yeah, keeps doing By the way, Drew keeps telling people
that I'll be going out with them, and then he
comes also comes up to me like last minute, it's.

Speaker 2 (23:31):
Like you said yes, you said yes.

Speaker 1 (23:33):
I always say yes. I say yes to everything. I
can't say no. I don't have that kind of like yeah, sure.

Speaker 3 (23:40):
No, don't do that. Please don't do that.

Speaker 1 (23:42):
Oh he'd be jealous because you would not look back
after getting some head from me. I would be literally useless.
Kai would be like anybody who got stuck with that
fucking Spotify.

Speaker 2 (23:54):
God bless the brigs. That's so funny you mentioned that
because I just saw like like a carved detailing video
with one of those inside the car, and it had
like a sunburn on it, like the sun had like

(24:18):
burned a hole into the screen and like he was
cleaning it with like a steam wand and I was like,
did he do that with the string? I already, Yeah,
it's brigged, but it was free. It was free, so
like I'll give it to Spotify.

Speaker 3 (24:30):
Okay, yeah, it was free, and like that thing didn't
wasn't that the name for that product? The thing?

Speaker 2 (24:37):
I think you might be right.

Speaker 3 (24:38):
They needed something weird where they kind of knew that
it was trash or something. I saw gonna.

Speaker 2 (24:43):
Did anybody actually touch one of those? Because was it
made of garbage?

Speaker 1 (24:46):
I don't know. I'm not kidding. I really wanted one, though.

Speaker 2 (24:49):
I did. I mean, and also my car like already
has that.

Speaker 1 (24:54):
My car didn't have that at the time, or mine
had car Play.

Speaker 2 (24:57):
But it was Spotify car play thingy yeah, Spotify car thing. Yeah,
Spotify bricked the car thing so I hacked mind. Yeah,
jail break the car thing? Can you play Dune Doom
on the car thing? Doom done? Oh the movie no
Doom Doom Doom Doom.

Speaker 1 (25:17):
Tickets for something?

Speaker 3 (25:20):
What?

Speaker 2 (25:22):
Oh that's what monster trust?

Speaker 1 (25:24):
Oh yesterday, remember when you Milisien Derby bitch? Can you
fucking let me speak?

Speaker 3 (25:28):
Let her speak?

Speaker 1 (25:30):
Oh my god, we have to talk about the movies.
You have to talk about the movies. Kai your movies
experience experience like you, me and Josh, how we all
got bullied by the AMC Century fifteen malt.

Speaker 3 (25:43):
Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (25:45):
Also, I booked a movie ticket to Century City, AMC bitch.
Three minutes before my movie started, the water pipes burst
and flooded the whole fucking theater. And they gave me
a refund from my A list membership zero dollars.

Speaker 3 (26:00):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (26:01):
They were like, here's your refund and it was zero dollars. Like,
don't even fucking tell me that ship. But what happened?

Speaker 3 (26:06):
Oh yeah, we went to the movies and then and
you tried to bring she went to what was that?
She got like a three course meal at dent Tiphung
with like the most garlicy ass green and then she
tried to like bring it into the theater and the
guy was obviously.

Speaker 1 (26:22):
Like, I care about what I put in my body.

Speaker 3 (26:25):
And then I brought skinny pop because I because I
don't want to eat the unhealthy popcorn at the theater.
And then since I was you.

Speaker 2 (26:33):
Were so gay. It's crazy. It is so sho, you're gay.

Speaker 1 (26:39):
We have to back up, by the way, because I
showed up with Josh, Me and Josh rode together. I
showed it with Josh. I had my bag of did typhong.
It was passed, and in my head, I'm just like,
well the dent'tiphung is in this mall, bitch, it's my leftovers.
It's like eight pm. I was just gonna be like,
it's my leftovers. I won't eat in there.

Speaker 3 (26:57):
It was five bocks.

Speaker 2 (26:59):
I know, because when Ya goes to DENTI Funk, she
orders the whole goddamn menu and never finishes it.

Speaker 1 (27:05):
Okay, well yeah, she.

Speaker 3 (27:07):
Was stuffing bow buns into her pocket.

Speaker 1 (27:14):
I go to go in and the guys like, you
can't bring food in here, and I said it's leftovers,
and he said no, you have to put it in
your car. And then I was like no what. So
I just turned around and I went outside, and I
opened up and I started like shoving these string beans
in my mouth because I'm just like, okay that I
can't sneak in there. But I'm smart enough that I

(27:35):
thought about this. I had a game plan in a way,
because I got buns instead of I usually at dumplings.
I was like, oh, buns I could put in my pocket.

Speaker 2 (27:44):
Sow lung bow into your pockets and then bursting like
fucking discharge pustu.

Speaker 1 (27:48):
Literally like a weapon, like.

Speaker 2 (27:52):
Throwing it at the screen. Wait. No, people are ultimately
good because you can just throw like soda, like sodaes
that the screen in the movies if.

Speaker 3 (28:00):
You do not see the Minecraft movie trend or people
are like bringing bombs into the chicken jockey scene. But yeah,
and you put a box of like the dessert bow
buns into her like the back of her waist, like
the waistband like a gun of my dan.

Speaker 1 (28:15):
You know, I had a zip up on, so I
put my zip up on.

Speaker 5 (28:19):
Wait, so you sat on them, No, bitch, I put
them here, and then I put two buns in my pocket.

Speaker 2 (28:25):
You should have put them in your boobs. Ow, how
was that any different.

Speaker 1 (28:33):
I don't know what if he was like can I
check you?

Speaker 2 (28:35):
And can I grab yours?

Speaker 1 (28:39):
But when I was walking back in, we were with
Kai and he had his fucking skinny pop and I
was finishing one of my buns, and the look look
this man gave me was like I was literally bringing
a fucking machete into the movie theaters, Like I might
as well have literally been shropped down because he thought
I was.

Speaker 2 (28:58):
The drop down, Like fit, what do you mean?

Speaker 1 (29:04):
Okay, sorry, keep going, But yeah, then Kai, I had
not here for the rest of it because then Kai
gets stopped.

Speaker 2 (29:14):
God he does like my worst Fuck.

Speaker 1 (29:16):
That's the thing I will give you credit for because
I should have done the same thing, which is he
stood up for himself because like plenty of people walking
in here with food, which we'll get to later, but
like I just go in because I'm hot, like I
literally got back ship hold me.

Speaker 2 (29:31):
I gotta get.

Speaker 3 (29:35):
Smuggled like three thousand calories of Chinese like literal heat.

Speaker 1 (29:40):
Like the chicken buns are so good, but they when
they pop open, like I need to go because like
I'm like, there's a sight.

Speaker 2 (29:49):
Wait what happened with Kai?

Speaker 3 (29:52):
I was I was really confident because I've gone before
and whenever if they do say something, I'm like, I
have severe allergies, which is technically true, and they're like, okay, fine,
but I think because I was with you, he was like,
these people are really sketchy, so I'm not.

Speaker 2 (30:07):
They're sneaking in guns inside a bout buns like.

Speaker 1 (30:10):
You need to be there. I was like, okay, keep.

Speaker 3 (30:13):
Going, and then he called the manager over. No way,
because I was like, it's not going to get to
that point, like it's two bags small bags of popcorn,
and the manager comes over. He's like, absolutely not, You're
not fucking bringing that in here, because he definitely he.

Speaker 2 (30:26):
Was agro immediately.

Speaker 3 (30:27):
Was notified of our group of friends for sure because
of Enya, like she was. She was like a you
know someone that they number.

Speaker 2 (30:36):
The cameras are like following her through the So then
I left the theater with no ass and no boobs
and walked in with giant knockers in an ass. They
know those bow buns are in there, babe, you did
not get a bbl in the back.

Speaker 1 (30:49):
Also with the kind of zip up that the pockets
are kind of tight, and you could see that there we.

Speaker 2 (30:55):
Could wait wait wait wait, oh my god, bbl albun.

Speaker 1 (31:01):
What's the l lesbians?

Speaker 3 (31:04):
Yes, So then I gave Josh. I gave Josh to
the bags of popcorn when he got to the other
side of the line, and then he went up and
then he got stopped.

Speaker 1 (31:14):
Also, I did see this.

Speaker 2 (31:16):
Part, so all three of them got stopped. Yeah, oh
my god, that's my worst fucking namemare, dude, were there
people behind you?

Speaker 3 (31:23):
There are so many people.

Speaker 2 (31:24):
Oh my god, dude, there.

Speaker 3 (31:25):
Were people with like rotisserie chickens hidden in their fucking bags.
Because when we were in the movie.

Speaker 1 (31:30):
Oh yeah, because we Also I did see his popcorn,
like your popcorn, like I because I went I went
up and I was like, fuck it, I'm gonna get
a soda because I like, I'm not stupid. I knew
I couldn't bring a soda from Didn't Die Funk into
the theater. So I go to get a soda and
like I'm waiting at the top of the stairs, I
just see Josh like picking something up, and like I

(31:51):
see the manager come over to Josh and he's like
goes like this to him, and then Josh start he hey,
got me, like dude, and we're all.

Speaker 2 (31:59):
Just wait, why did he drop the fucking bag of pop?
Oh my god?

Speaker 3 (32:03):
And then so I got it and I and then
I looked and the manager was just looking at me
directly in the eyes, and he was like pointed out
the trash, and I was like okay, and I like
walked over to the trash and then kind of like
walked past it, and he was like, no, third in
the fucking.

Speaker 2 (32:15):
Trash, Oh my god.

Speaker 3 (32:17):
And I was like, I've never experienced a movie theater experience.

Speaker 1 (32:20):
It was really high school. It was kind of fun.

Speaker 6 (32:22):
But then, oh, bitch, your lucky naked gun changed my
mood because when we were sitting down, not one, not two,
but three fucking motherfuckers came into the movie theater with didn't.

Speaker 1 (32:33):
I I funk bags literally just like they did not
fuck with our vibe.

Speaker 2 (32:40):
Honestly fair, I don't believe why I'd be there.

Speaker 3 (32:44):
You don't like us.

Speaker 2 (32:46):
When have I ever liked y'all?

Speaker 3 (32:49):
When I was clapping your ship, that is nothing you're saying.
When I was rearranging your guts, you didn't enjoy it.

Speaker 2 (32:57):
When you were pressing on my stack so you could
feel it.

Speaker 3 (32:59):
And getting the triangular pillow and putting it under your
lower When I pulled out the pebble m it's a vibrator. Yeah,
I know.

Speaker 2 (33:10):
Okay, Well, this is something very special that happened that
I don't think y'all will understand, but I know there
are people out there that will get this. But there's
this gay couple on Oh what the fuck? No, there's
this gay couple on Instagram called probably this and they

(33:32):
like buy homes and remodel them and they're they're an
interior design couple and like they've been together for twelve years.
They wrote books, they built this empire of a business together.
They are like gold standard for like gay relationship. At
least they like appear.

Speaker 1 (33:50):
You're talking about. Are they on TikTok too?

Speaker 2 (33:52):
Yeah? Yeah. One of them's bald, one of them's not. Well,
they just post the most. I'm not. It is the
scariest video I've ever seen. Like it is the scariest
fucking video I've ever seen in my life.

Speaker 1 (34:05):
It was babies after seeing the cappuccina.

Speaker 2 (34:08):
Baby's ever seeing Bart the dragon bitch. But this video
they might have deleted it because like when I saw it.

Speaker 1 (34:17):
We're people not happy, like were people in the comment
saying like it's scared them too because.

Speaker 2 (34:22):
It Oh my god, they deleted it.

Speaker 1 (34:23):
Holy shit, wait let me see because I need to
see this.

Speaker 2 (34:26):
They deleted it. That's crazy. But yeah, I'll show you them.
I'll show you them after. But basically they posted this
video of them, Like.

Speaker 1 (34:40):
I was gonna say, I literally feel like our audience
for the first time, and I understand their gripes about
not seeing it because the fact that your iPhone is
in your hand and you won't let me look at
the face.

Speaker 2 (34:48):
It's just like throwing me off that they deleted it.

Speaker 1 (34:52):
Yes, like this is real time reporting right now.

Speaker 2 (34:57):
I'm like literally shakingre's.

Speaker 1 (34:59):
The news in the media. Choose the news of the
media for this random.

Speaker 2 (35:04):
Couple probably this video. Okay, so again, this is the
scariest video I think I've ever seen in my entire life.
Like if if you keep up with them, like you understand,
like how earth shattering this is. Like I've been watching
them for the past like four or five years, and
like they're they're cute, Like they're a cute couple. They randomly,

(35:28):
out of the fucking blue uploaded this.

Speaker 3 (35:31):
Sure we broke up.

Speaker 7 (35:37):
It's been a privilege doing twelve years together as like partners,
and for ten years sharing that online with everyone.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
And look at the pain behind his eyes. This dude
already has a boyfriend. This dude got cheated on. The
bald Guy got cheated on and decided.

Speaker 7 (35:59):
It feels both that it's like silly to have to
do this and also like kind of necessary.

Speaker 2 (36:03):
Yes, like the dumbest video.

Speaker 7 (36:07):
I think I could imagine this belongs in my journal,
not like out there.

Speaker 2 (36:12):
Yes, I want you to.

Speaker 3 (36:16):
Know on single.

Speaker 7 (36:19):
We're really lucky to be on great terms and to
respect each other so much and to still have so
much love for each other.

Speaker 2 (36:25):
He's like to cry, did the worst parts coming?

Speaker 7 (36:29):
If I need you to build something for me, I'm
probably still gonna call you. You're gonna pay me, Okay,
Oh my god. If you're watching this on TikTok, Matt
will be leading that account. If you're on Instagram, you're
stuck with me.

Speaker 2 (36:43):
Oh my god, Oh my god, I just put this together. Matt.
The Bald guy owns the TikTok account, and then the
black shirt guy owns the Instagram account. He deleted it
off the Instagram, but Matt kept it up on fucking TikTok.
Oh my god, wait, I really I need to find
someone that knows these two. You want to follow, Matt,

(37:04):
it's at matter motto. I'm gonna take a second to
like lick my wounds and be like, what the just happened.
I'm really like grateful too. I've had you in my life.

Speaker 7 (37:18):
I'm proud of what we've done, and I'm proud of
what we're doing right now.

Speaker 2 (37:24):
The fucking fist bump, the fist bump at the end
of the video is so fucking scary. A twelve year
relationship ending with the fucking fist bump and like having
to reluctantly like fist bump your partner that probably just
like ruined and completely destabilized your life, like something sinister happened.
And like when I saw that video, it was so so,

(37:47):
so so so scary for me, Like I was like,
oh my god, like it really can just like come
to that like whoa dude, I I can't.

Speaker 1 (37:55):
I can't really destabilizing. Oh I really feel bad for
Bold guy. Yeah, I mean I feel bad for like
anybody who has a public relationship because like, although you
put yourself in that position, it is so gnarly to
have to navigate that, especially in the circumstance like that.

Speaker 2 (38:11):
Also, like black shirt Guy is what I'm gonna call him,
because I don't know his name. I think it might
be Bo, question Mark David. But he is absolutely fucking destroyed.

Speaker 1 (38:25):
He should he should have came with a different vibe,
like exactly from one. And I am saying this, I
need everyone to know, like I'll admit my rights and
I'll admit my wrongs like I got a black shirt onto.
I've been there too. Literally read the fucking room like
you are you're gonna call to get something built.

Speaker 2 (38:47):
Don't say that like chill, We're gonna be best friends forever.

Speaker 1 (38:50):
Back up back.

Speaker 2 (38:52):
Oh ho, back the fuck up?

Speaker 1 (38:55):
Oh fuck? That video is so hard to walk.

Speaker 2 (39:00):
Yeah, it's so scary, and like I've been like, oh.

Speaker 1 (39:03):
What are we doing to ourselves? Poor guys?

Speaker 2 (39:06):
Like no, I feel bad for both of them, but.

Speaker 5 (39:10):
Well I feel bad for both of them because that's
also the bald guy for the past like two months
has been posting like ripped like hot shirts photos.

Speaker 2 (39:22):
I think they live in South Carolina? What gay people
live in South Carolina?

Speaker 1 (39:27):
A lot of gay people. I'm not kidding it weirdly,
is like a lot of the gay people in my family.

Speaker 2 (39:33):
South Carolina super close to DC. Is it like a
train right away because the DC gays are scary.

Speaker 1 (39:39):
I don't know. I just know that North Carolina and
South Carolina in my head, there's a lot of gays
there because a lot of the women who are gay
in my family, Slash who I grew up with, like
ended up there.

Speaker 2 (39:51):
Question Mark Western and Kaylin are both very gay people
and they're from South Carolina.

Speaker 1 (40:01):
They're gay.

Speaker 2 (40:03):
Yeah, oh, welcome in. Yeah exactly. Well.

Speaker 1 (40:08):
I also I'm here as like a like a chaperone. Yeah,
that's why I'm in here. You're moderating, Yes, I'm the
mode of the Thank God.

Speaker 2 (40:17):
I went to Joshua Tree to see the Percy meteor
shower and it was meteor show. Yeah. Yeah, the Percy
Jackson and the Lightning Thief meteor shower.

Speaker 4 (40:25):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (40:25):
That shit was fucking crazy. I told you to come
like six times, I know, but I had, but my
Airbnb host was kind of being like, do not bring
any uninvited, unknown guests into the house, and like he
was being like very crazy about it. Yeah, Joshua Tree
was beautiful. I saw thirty meteors in an hour, which
is fucking crazy, and a couple of them had like

(40:47):
three second trails that left like shimmer behind. It was
so fucking crazy, so gorgeous. I made thirty which I.

Speaker 1 (40:57):
Was watching ninety Day Fiance while you were watching that.

Speaker 2 (41:00):
None of my wishes came true, Not a single one
of them came true.

Speaker 1 (41:04):
You literally what was that like three days ago?

Speaker 2 (41:06):
Yeah, but you're only bitch.

Speaker 1 (41:08):
You saw three thirty meteors and wanted thirty wishes.

Speaker 2 (41:11):
Yes, thirty lbs. It was probably more like twenty five meteors. Actually,
I took like a seventeen minute video so I could
like hear the because it like it really like it
triggers something so fucking primal in your body, where like
you just make sounds like you don't speak, You just
like make like oohs and alls like a fucking cave man,

(41:31):
Like I don't know, it was cool.

Speaker 1 (41:34):
Oh I wish I saw that.

Speaker 2 (41:36):
No and literally know and gives a fuck about me
and telling my meteor trees meteor shower story.

Speaker 1 (41:40):
No, I do love it. The closest I got to
that is when I went to like a lake and
there was a random metior shower, and I saw a
few shooting stars, but like or maybe when I was
with you and your mom, No way we saw one.

Speaker 2 (41:52):
We saw one. Yeah, we went we saw a meteor
shower in my front yard when you came to Texas
when we were like fifteen.

Speaker 1 (41:58):
Yeah, and we see one in Osha tree.

Speaker 3 (42:01):
I think they were shooting stars because there's like always
We saw a couple from the front yard right right, y'all.

Speaker 2 (42:11):
Remember the Faith over Fear tattoo cover up? No, oh
my god, faith over fear. This woman had faith over
fear tattooed on her neck right here, and you just
faith over fear. And she went to a tattoo artist
and was like, honestly, like I want this covered up.
I'll let you choose anything anything you want, like whatever

(42:32):
you are the best at, Like, I'll let you cover
up this fucking tattoo. Bitch. This is the faith overfear tattoo.
Like not bad, like just not the vibe anymore. Why
did she cover it up with a fucking rainbow cupcake?
That looks like shit, It looks like a juggalo painted it,

(42:54):
Like girl, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 (42:58):
That looks like a like the girl like in middle
school when it was like back in my day, when
it was rare to see in middle school or smoking anything.
But the only middle schooler in seventh grade you knew
who was allowed to smoke weed would draw something like that.

Speaker 2 (43:11):
That is the meanest thing I think anyone's ever done
to a human being, that is, And it's big as fuck,
Like it's huge, and you can still see faith over
fucking fear in the fucking cupcake.

Speaker 1 (43:22):
Oh you cared, like girl, dude, what the fuck? Okay?
But also like to this lady, she had to put
a stencil down or did you let her free hands?

Speaker 2 (43:33):
I think I think she was, like I don't. I
want it to be a surprise, because they did. There's
a video of their review. I can't find it anywhere.
But like, no, I've drawn that cupcake in seventh grade before,
like that exact cupcake, But like, what is going on
with Like.

Speaker 1 (43:47):
Wait, you boy in middle school drawing cupcakes?

Speaker 2 (43:59):
I love my little pony, Guys, I love my little pony.

Speaker 1 (44:03):
I loved care bears.

Speaker 2 (44:05):
They knights.

Speaker 3 (44:07):
Oh broni broni bronie.

Speaker 2 (44:09):
Jibbroni fucking JIBBRONI. I don't know, maybe we should look
that up. That might be like bad for me.

Speaker 3 (44:16):
This broni. Yeah, I think that was just the thing
that people in the nineties would like, say.

Speaker 2 (44:20):
You fucking gibbroni? Is it like you done?

Speaker 3 (44:22):
Let me look up? Is jibebroni problematic? The word jabbroni
can be considered problematic depending on the context and intent
of its use. It's an insult. The primary definition of
jabbroni is foolish, contemptible person, or a loser.

Speaker 2 (44:38):
Okay, so both Ya and Kai are jibbroni.

Speaker 3 (44:41):
Okay, Well it's problematic according to Google. So you need
to apologize now.

Speaker 2 (44:47):
Guys, y'all know Tan mom, you know I've been mentioning
her a lot. Well, I found out that she has
a book, and I bought the book and the title
of the book is called The Color Tan.

Speaker 3 (45:06):
That's insane.

Speaker 2 (45:07):
It's really, really, really fucking crazy. It's really good, and
it's like fucking it's it's quite literally the worst book
I have ever cracked up in my life. No, it's
what do you mean.

Speaker 3 (45:18):
You cracked it open?

Speaker 2 (45:19):
I fucked it, y'all. Don't fuck your books. I fuck
for knowledge. I'm a sapio sexual. I massage your mind,
not your bajinie guys. Instead of a wet t shirt contest,
we need a wet mind.

Speaker 1 (45:35):
Contest, you wet book contest.

Speaker 2 (45:38):
Wait, did y'all know that there are fleas that if
they bite you, they make you allergic to me? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (45:47):
Okay, I can't lie though. My stomach is literally tossing
and turning. So I'm gonna go shit, and y'all are
gonna have to sit for like ten minutes.

Speaker 2 (45:53):
And you had to take a ship and you went
and took a dump.

Speaker 1 (45:57):
And it was successful. It was awesome, it was healthy,
it was amazing. I got to use my phone, which
did give me a passing thought, and I wiped my
phone down with an alcohol wipe after because I'm neurotic
like that. But I did find myself really grossed out
at the idea of all of us carrying our phones
into bathrooms and shit all the time. And I don't

(46:17):
think anybody cleans their phone at.

Speaker 2 (46:19):
The hotel in San Diego the past few days, I literally,
like for some reason was like so like germ freaked out,
Like I don't know if it was just like the
amount of like I was just thinking about the amount
of sex that was like happening in that room, and
it was like grossing me out crazy, Like laying on

(46:41):
that zebra print couch was a lot for me.

Speaker 1 (46:45):
That's you projecting. You're projecting about like having sex on
a bunch of random things.

Speaker 2 (46:51):
Yeah, I have sex all over the place.

Speaker 1 (46:53):
Yeah that's like, do you care if I say that
you like Drew mention that one time he's had like
a thing with someone where like the whole running gag
was like we fucking every room that you're fully just
projecting that.

Speaker 2 (47:05):
I think it's funny. I think it's hilarious.

Speaker 1 (47:08):
I mean, I agree with you, it is hilarious, but
it is crazy we just share rooms like that as humans,
Like it's fine it. Have you seen that fucking plane
that they'll take you up in the sky and let
you fuck in the back of it. Oh yeah, Like
get a grip again. If your hobby is sex.

Speaker 2 (47:24):
Whoa something is seriously all that's not good. You know,
while you were while you were taking taking your big fat,
stinky dump, Kai was taking one at the same time,
which I thought was really special and cute. But yeah,
I was scrolling. I was scrolling on Instagram, just chilling
and I found this swingers couple and I was like,
I watched like six of their videos while y'all were

(47:45):
like doing y'all's thing, and that is so interesting. It
is so fascinating to me.

Speaker 1 (47:52):
Yeah, I mean I'm pro swingers. I just like get
that out of my face and they'll talk to me.

Speaker 2 (47:56):
No. Yeah, they were like talking about like going to
the bar to hit on married cup, which happened to Kayette.

Speaker 1 (48:02):
Yeah, well kay is in a married couple. He's a
random guy.

Speaker 3 (48:06):
Yeah, I got hit on. I forget what happens.

Speaker 2 (48:09):
Just they like came up to you and they thought
you were hot.

Speaker 3 (48:12):
Oh yeah. But then oh, the one guy said that
we weren't gay.

Speaker 2 (48:16):
Oh yeah. We were like, oh, we're gay together, and
then he was like, y'all are not gay. I can tell.

Speaker 3 (48:20):
I was trying to get out of it, so I
started hooking up with my god.

Speaker 2 (48:24):
He started making out on the dance floor.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
I immediately started bouncing off all.

Speaker 2 (48:27):
Kissed me and Drew No, I don't let him.

Speaker 3 (48:31):
He's spit in my mouth. That's about it as close
as it gets.

Speaker 7 (48:37):
Girl.

Speaker 2 (48:38):
Me and and you had a very special moment in
the car ride down to San Diego.

Speaker 1 (48:42):
Oh, Yeah, it was sweet.

Speaker 3 (48:43):
It was sweet.

Speaker 2 (48:44):
It was just for us.

Speaker 3 (48:46):
Sorry.

Speaker 1 (48:46):
Yeah, we were talking about like how we've changed, oh,
because we were talking about how I used to be
way more angry, but being friends with Drew kind of
taught me how to place my anger in a way
that doesn't like endanger me.

Speaker 2 (49:03):
And I like how to say no, And I learned
how to say no through you. No No, how about this?

Speaker 3 (49:10):
No No, that's very poetic. You guys kind of completed
each other a little bit.

Speaker 1 (49:15):
Yeah, that's what we're talking.

Speaker 2 (49:18):
People. Really fuck.

Speaker 1 (49:22):
Well. Honestly, I think that was a sign. That was
a sign for the universe. The universe was saying, yeah,
keep that to you guys, like that's for us.

Speaker 2 (49:29):
Mm. The camera died right when we were saying that,
so like we're keeping that to ourselves. That's the universe
speaking to us to keep it to us. But yeah,
we are soulmates. I don't think people realize, like truly
truly realize that we complete each other. And it takes work,
even even in moments of frustration and anger, because.

Speaker 1 (49:49):
We still disagree all the time. On a daily basis,
I feel like we disagree.

Speaker 2 (49:55):
I think what it is is we figured out how
each other communicates, and we figured out what's worth talking
about and what's not worth talking about. And I think
that's literally the key to any relationship.

Speaker 1 (50:10):
Also, it is the thing of I we don't argue
so much because it's like you're saying, I can recognize
when something is just pushing it there, and it's very
rare that line is crossed, and then when it is,
it's resolved so quickly. But for the most part, it
is just like.

Speaker 2 (50:23):
We've never had something that We've never had something that
hasn't been resolved within an hour, like yeah, and it's
it's literally just like fucking.

Speaker 1 (50:34):
Just eat it. No, you just fucking eat it. And
then someone would ease like I don't know. It's like
you have to figure out what to eat. It's hard
to figure out your diet, but you've got to figure
out what's eating.

Speaker 2 (50:45):
And we all have a hunger period. So let's just
feast together.

Speaker 3 (50:51):
Wait, yeah, let's feast first, feast.

Speaker 2 (50:55):
First, we feast hot ones.

Speaker 3 (50:57):
Yeah, it's important to learn the language that you're partner
is speaking, Like, for instance, I learned with Drew. He
speaks Morse code of the clapping noises of me bouncing on.

Speaker 2 (51:09):
It are there, you're gonna say something like genuine Can
you say something genuine about me? Kai, I'll say something
genuine about you. I think you're like really really really intelligent.
I've like had some of the most like intellectually stimulating
conversations in my entire life.

Speaker 3 (51:25):
Yeah, I think that you're a genuinely very magnetic person
and people are truly attracted to you in a way.
And I don't even mean sexually, I mean like or wise.
That is very rare.

Speaker 2 (51:36):
Yees say one about Enya and Inya. You say one
about Kai.

Speaker 3 (51:42):
Yeah, there's a perfect ten. Okay, do one about me.

Speaker 1 (51:47):
I'm trying to think, like seriously, let me think on this.

Speaker 3 (51:52):
Mind. Friend, you're being three words.

Speaker 2 (51:54):
Inya is ten dime piece on sex pot but no,
But to me.

Speaker 1 (52:00):
A dime piece is way more than a batty because
it's true, someone the dime and then someone's a baddy.

Speaker 3 (52:07):
Likes like, someone will get degraded from status of a
dying piece if they have a mean, ugly personality.

Speaker 2 (52:15):
Did I have a twink death? I think I had
a twink death, like way before I was supposed to
have a twin.

Speaker 3 (52:20):
Death, premature twint death.

Speaker 2 (52:24):
But I was a fucking twink like bitch. I was
like drinking pinky drinkity Starbucks drink in my car with
like Arctic monkey shirts on.

Speaker 1 (52:35):
Like there's levels to this ship, though, Like there's really
levels to this ship. Because at the time, yeah, you
were twinkie, but twink was in demand for the straight girls.
It was actually kind of like the straightest thing to do.

Speaker 2 (52:51):
It was like gab It really was like literally metrosexual
corn France. Yeah, yeah, my god. I had the biggest
crush on Connor.

Speaker 1 (53:02):
I was gonna say, out of all those guys, I
was like, way, way, way, way, way, way, who's this one.

Speaker 2 (53:08):
I didn't recognize it was a crush until like five
years ago, but like I was observed. No, he's fine
shit still and he's like fucking like mine and his
own goddamn business, like doing whatever the fuck he does now,
and I respect the fuck out of that. Like he
made his bag, got his house and does what like walks,

(53:28):
like he goes on walks. Like that's so fierce.

Speaker 1 (53:30):
That's so fierce. But like, yeah, that was the thing.
To be gay was to be sought after by women,
Like I said, the most gay of my teen life
to men I thought were gay. I literally like it.

Speaker 2 (53:45):
Was just like you didn't they got your assad.

Speaker 1 (53:48):
He really just didn't know who was gay and who.

Speaker 2 (53:50):
Was lying, Like Danya would send me unsolicited nudes all
the time. I'm I'm joking, I'm joking.

Speaker 1 (53:57):
I actually wish no I would have done that to
you because like I want you. But see, that's why
I'm saying you were gay guys. Yeah, but I but
I think.

Speaker 2 (54:06):
I was in love with you in a different way. Yeah,
That's what I'm.

Speaker 1 (54:08):
Saying, is I think I still was because I will
never forget Weston asking me. I think Weston was the
first person to ask me just straight up, or maybe
it was another like little guy. It was Weston, but like,
well he's a little guy in the fence, like he's
like way younger than Yeah, he was like a jit,
like he was a child. So I was like, very
I'll never forget it because I was so shocked by

(54:30):
like a young person at being so straightforward. But he
was like I was tangenting on to him and maybe
Kaylin about how much I liked Drew, and then they
were like I wasn't saying anything about the way you
look or like being attracted to or anything. And then
they were like, but would you kiss him? And then
I was like like I think yeah, like but like

(54:51):
for me, it felt more so like isn't that what
you're supposed to do, like next, like that's the next move,
but the idea of actually doing it, I was like, no,
I know, like it's never Yeah, it's never been the
thing other than when I came on to you.

Speaker 2 (55:02):
But that was because I, oh my gosh, that was
so lit.

Speaker 1 (55:05):
I think we bleeped that out.

Speaker 2 (55:07):
We might have bleeped it out.

Speaker 1 (55:08):
Yeah, because I was like so embarrassed.

Speaker 2 (55:09):
And Ya, Like I was laying in bed in another
person's hotel room and Enya literally got on top of
me and straddled me and started like kissing my neck
and like literally like trying to like get in, get in.

Speaker 1 (55:23):
Get in it.

Speaker 2 (55:26):
Yeah, it was my thing and it was fucking lit,
Like it was so lit, like I love being desired.

Speaker 1 (55:30):
Were other people in the room, Yes, I decapped, Wow,
that's crazy, yeah, weird weird times, Yeah.

Speaker 2 (55:37):
But I fucking love that shit. That's like my favorite.

Speaker 1 (55:39):
So when you first Also, the thing was when we
we bleeped it out on the episode, because when you
told me, I have no recollection of it. Like, I
fully trauma blocked that because I think I was like.

Speaker 5 (55:49):
That and that was bad.

Speaker 1 (55:52):
And I didn't remember it, so I wanted to block
it out because.

Speaker 2 (55:54):
Like, but I very easily could have been like get
the fuck off.

Speaker 1 (55:57):
No, but no, it's not even that, Like I.

Speaker 2 (55:59):
Let it happen becase as I was like girl, like yes, yes,
get yours queen.

Speaker 1 (56:05):
That is so amazing, Like yeah, and now I don't,
I have no pull. I can't do stuff like that ever. Again. Yeah,
what's crazy is like with people who I was like
sexually attracted to and ship, I wait, y'all never.

Speaker 2 (56:21):
Said the nice thing about each other.

Speaker 3 (56:23):
And yeah, I genuinely think you're one of the funniest
people I've ever met.

Speaker 2 (56:26):
This episode. You have been fucking on you this fucking episode.
You've been saying some of the most advanced jokes I've
ever heard in my.

Speaker 3 (56:37):
Serious You have like a it girl beauty, which is
like a very rare beauty. I do think and hers
the most boring thing about her because she's the boring thing.

Speaker 2 (56:48):
Yeah, but.

Speaker 1 (56:50):
I think this is literally a side for us to saw.

Speaker 2 (56:54):
This is genuine need and you just trying so hard
to out of complimenting kai.

Speaker 3 (57:01):
I was gonna say, but you know what I'm saying,
as far as girl beauty.

Speaker 2 (57:04):
Goes, she's got a special beauty.

Speaker 3 (57:06):
Yeah, your turn in you. I wasn't done.

Speaker 2 (57:10):
I said one thing and you you also.

Speaker 3 (57:12):
You also you have a lot of very good outfits.

Speaker 1 (57:16):
Thank you.

Speaker 2 (57:18):
You have to give me to now you gave me one.

Speaker 3 (57:20):
Dude, Come on, You're I'm constantly complimenting you.

Speaker 1 (57:24):
I know podcast is talk about wanting to fuck you.

Speaker 2 (57:27):
That doesn't count. I'm kidding.

Speaker 1 (57:33):
My compliment kai Is.

Speaker 2 (57:36):
Just say it.

Speaker 1 (57:37):
No, I'm trying to think of how to word it,
like I'm actually somebody who I think about my words period.
I guess Actually no, I don't like literally have, but
in this moment, see how I learn, and I changed
my compliment to kai Is. I am a very harsh person,
and when I met you, I feel like I was

(58:00):
very against your existence because I just did not know you.
And you are one of the very few and rare
cases that not only have you proved me wrong about
your character, but like I genuinely feel like, despite your
age and everything, you genuinely are constantly like so open
to changing and like your biggest thing is wanting to
just like be in a room and be of use,

(58:23):
whether it's like comedically, emotionally, intellectually, like you just you
are a useful human being by nature. And you're very
nice and sweet.

Speaker 3 (58:33):
Thank you. That is very sweet.

Speaker 2 (58:35):
All right, that's so cute.

Speaker 1 (58:40):
Ah, And I mean, oh my god.

Speaker 3 (58:46):
You have really nice hair, which I really you know,
I know, I know that's like more of a shallow thing,
but you know that.

Speaker 2 (58:51):
That's like big, No, that's major for me.

Speaker 3 (58:53):
You have really nice hair, and it's like it has
like a nice texture to it.

Speaker 1 (59:00):
For cod.

Speaker 2 (59:02):
What else, Well, Kai's just a genuinely good person.

Speaker 3 (59:05):
Oh you know what, I actually do always think about
this with you. You're a very multi dimensional person. And
I remember when I first met you, I was like
blown away by the like diversity of interests you had
that were very real, and I was like, I truly
have no idea the depth to this person. Where you know,
sometimes like you'll meet people and you'll be like I

(59:27):
kind of know like what the limits of like what
they're interested in, or like what the areas of what
they're interested in. I was like, very I think you're
one of the first people I would. I would consciously
be like, I'm excited hanging out this person because they
have such a wide variety of interests and like on
very different ends of different spectrum.

Speaker 2 (59:48):
That's something I pride myself on. Yeah, I has never
done harm in his life.

Speaker 4 (59:53):
Oh oh, what does that mean?

Speaker 1 (59:58):
The camera keeps cutting out. I'm just gonna keep talking
because like, just put a blank screen, bro.

Speaker 3 (01:00:04):
I think I'll give us two minutes.

Speaker 2 (01:00:05):
But yeah, Kai has never done any bad thing in
his life. He only had He's well meaning and has
good intentions with every single move he makes.

Speaker 3 (01:00:13):
Thank you, that's very sweet.

Speaker 2 (01:00:15):
And that was this episode of Emergency Intercom. Thank you
for watching. I watched It's complicated. It was that so
fucking good, really really funny. Maybe cry.

Speaker 1 (01:00:30):
I don't know if it made me cry.

Speaker 2 (01:00:31):
No, it didn't. It didn't make me cry.

Speaker 1 (01:00:32):
It might have made me cry.

Speaker 2 (01:00:33):
I wanted to cry.

Speaker 1 (01:00:34):
I think I cry at every movie I watched.

Speaker 2 (01:00:36):
Though, Mmm, like, you're just an emotional person.

Speaker 1 (01:00:41):
You just I'm practicing. I practice for my manipulation, manipulation, manipulation.

Speaker 2 (01:00:48):
God that my psychic said manipulation And she was in
the song is the skin of My Yellow Country Teeth.
Oh my gosh, so good.

Speaker 8 (01:01:00):
My music is Hose Be Mad by Cash Copain, Daisy
Jane by America, Jerkin' by A mil and The Sniffers
Swaying by j T.

Speaker 2 (01:01:17):
That's it, beautiful, guys. I just want to say thank
you for tuning in.

Speaker 3 (01:01:23):
And mine is the Rick and Morty meal for McDonald's.

Speaker 1 (01:01:26):
I are they for real still on about that ship.

Speaker 3 (01:01:32):
My media is the session sauce the ses sauce meme
on Reddit

Speaker 1 (01:02:05):
Three