July 9, 2025 • 50 mins
Drew got hit by lightning and it turned him straight. Enya got a wall e chair that has an ipad and a toilet attached to it so she can watch the secret lives of mormon housewives without having to get up to cr*p or eat
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:15):
Hi God, Welcome back to emergency Intercom.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Drew.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Drew is still well. He's off of like a few
meds right now, including like perks oxies. There's that new
one that people rp ten. Is that what?
Speaker 3 (00:37):
I don't know. I don't do drugs.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Yeah, he's off a few things, but he's okay for
the most part. It's just we went we went camping,
and while we were out of state, a storm came
in and Drew was trying to avoid the car because
we had a rental car and he didn't get insurance.
He never gets insurance on our rentals, and he was
running out to make sure hail didn't break the windshield
(00:59):
and he got struck by lightning.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Roll the fucking clip of me getting struck by goddamn lighting. Bro,
This ship is so fucking embarrassing.
Speaker 4 (01:07):
Like it.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
It's not like you need to reframe it. And I've
been trying to explain it.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
It's fucking karma. It's fucking karma for me laughing at
people getting struck by lightning and trees getting exploded. It's karma.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
But three times that's lucky. Now I'm trying to help him.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
It's not lucky.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
That's that is the opposite of it's like, my body
is burned, seventy percent of my body is burned.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Well, I saw on TikTok shop you could get this
really good alo vera for like thirty cents and it's
a gallon, so you should just get that and just
rub it off.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Just shut the fuck up.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
Hello, not cool.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
It's ever since the lightning hit him, he's been acting
so means.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Going fucking fault. This girl's fucking fault. No no, no, no, no,
no no no. Gay guy gets struck.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
By life, becomes incredibly funny, very like, very peaceful, very tranquil. No,
becomes the angriest, almost straighter version of the gay guy
that was there.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Fucking mad too. You would be mad too if your
hair got burnt off your fucking.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Scal All right, let's roll the clip again.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
I think you're just I'm not kidding. You do have
to re like reshape that or like refashionate, reconfigure it
in your mind. God is giving you the lemons are getting.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Struck, dude.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Now, your ears are probably just gonna you wanna hear that.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
It's the sound of your skin cracking.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Okay, you're you know when you like burst your ear
drum and you can hear like.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
I literally have that right now? Is out? What that
is this ear? If I press like my temple, it
feels like it's like the ear drum is going in
and out.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Like it's kind of impressive how you've made your hair
look like one of the hairs styles from like Killer.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Clowns in the face Cynthia, I look like Cynthia. Kind
that too, No, Cynthia from Rugras Guys Wicked Too comes
out in November, and that's.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
Not that far away.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
We're serious.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
You haven't like addressed the elephant in the room.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Inya, hey all, it's something bad happened to his brain.
The idea that the lightning her juice straight is really flick.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
I think that's what it feels like ever since you've
been all wrapped up. It's maybe it's because I'm missing
your gay face, because you just have you have.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
A gay face, you know, I literally don't know.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
You don't.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
No, I don't think you have a gay face. Some
people do have gay face, though you have a bit
of you have, like look at your face, Yeah, if
you look at your face for more than three seconds, And.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
I do think he has gay penis.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Penis can't be.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Big and happy.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Doesn't even make sense.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
No, it makes sense.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Well, we did go camping in Utah, and I am
not kidding. I fully understand how some motherfucker made up
like Mormonism out there, Like I really get it. We
were only out there for like three days, and I
genuinely mind you they don't have as much weat or
smoke as much weat as I put down. Oh boohoo,
(04:42):
nothing's changed. I'm going to rehab soon, but I like
literally get it because being out there, I genuinely felt
like I started to build, like I think I have telekinesis.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
No, it is such a special place and I hate
talking about it because it is like America's best cup secret.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Uta, America's best cup secret.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
No, it really is because everybody avoids it because of
like the Mormonism ship and like the hyper religion, which
I fully understand, but also t is like the pride
in fucking Utah, specifically Salt Lake City and the surrounding
area is honestly so fire like the amount of pride
or flags hanging.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Out your pride flags. I mean.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
The was actually really amazing, Like it really.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
The thing is he's not me.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
I'm not joking. I'm literally not the.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
One time you're expressing game pride in all serious.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
I'm wrapped in fucking gauze fun.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
They were really about their gay ship there. They did
not play granted. Their major city literally looks like if
if I took a Vivands and started my animal crossing
island and then gave up like an hour. Yeah, because
there's like then the rest.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Is like the city is also a fucking bowl and
it's like a smog pit. Like it literally it's dirtier
there than it is in La And it feels crazy
to say, but like like the amount of smog in
the air is crazy. But like also that opens up
another conversation. I literally don't give a shit, Like like
(06:31):
the air quality could be like the worst it's ever been,
Like I literally don't care.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Sur try to try to be normal.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Take it off.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
The look that you just gave me. It was so
like helpless.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
I don't know, Like, well, that's also because like, girl,
let's face it, the air quality is not We're not
getting making in pristine times right now. We're gonna be
like Dan. The air quality in twenty twenty five was
so good, like I can breathe out there. Oh, I
did just order my Wally chair. They're finally they have
(07:07):
the pre order Wally wheelchair.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
Nice.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
The one mine has an iPad in it, a rose toy.
They I was gonna.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Say mine has a dildos. I'm a bottom. Now I'm exploring,
believe it or not. I wasn't before, but after the
lightning all I can't do something. No, it's really really
really expanded things. No, honestly, it's like Popper is like
in a weird way.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Like getting struck by lightning. We should make it a
fat like the hot water.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Challenge hot water challenge job.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Wait, what's the last time challenge?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Job?
Speaker 1 (07:49):
The last time we had a trend like that that was.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Like devious and like making SMaL.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Kind of innocent, because I genuinely do think like I
don't think the person who started hot Water Challenge is innocent,
but I think like the girl I guess the last
time was that girl feeding her dad truros tempo pro
bar lows turos.
Speaker 5 (08:16):
Wow wa Yeah, that fucking bomb blowing up in his mouth.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
It's so crazy, it's really fucking crazy. But yeah, no,
someone needs to make another trend where they make like
mustard gas in their microwave in the kitchen. Actually, someone does.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Not need to say no, because isn't there that guy
who literally terrorizes on There's a bunch of guys who
do it, who like just going on meg and stuff and.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Get kids to put Oh yeah, they put in their
microwave and they explode and they destroy their microwaves. Dude,
My Instagram reels like have been so insane recently, Like
it's literally just like the most evil prank you've ever
seen in your life. Like it's not even funny, it's
just like it's just being mean to people. Like it's
(09:08):
literally like going up to someone and being like, hey,
like would answer answer genuine Hey, would you want to
go to the movie and hang out with me today?
Or would you want one hundred.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
Dollars I'll take a hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
No, no, no, say the friend or say that.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Said answer genuinely.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
I'm gonna say, say you would want to go to that?
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Okay, I'm gonna go with you to the movies.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
And then he goes on and he's like, well, you
fucking loser, like, oh, you want to hang out with
another man? And it's like this poor old soul that
really just wants a friend, and I feel so bad.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
For you craziers. Most of those people, it's not even
about them wanting a fucking friend. It's they see an
iPhone and it's like, at first, it's like, how fucking known?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
That's like, wait, I'm being recorded, I have I know.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I would hate for someone to go to the movies alone.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Yeah, double it or give it to the next person.
Did irreparable damages to society because everyone's now on their
best behavior on camera.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Like, I'm sorry, I'm not doubling it. I'm taking the
hundred dollars. I'm not going to the fucking movies.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
I'm doubling it.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
I'm doubling it.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
Too, doubling it and giving it to the next person. Yeah, yeah, no,
is it cash.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
I'm a giver, so whatever some people are taking.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Baby, he's the gibber and jow.
Speaker 5 (10:20):
He is the.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Tap Are you can you breathe like, are you all right?
Speaker 1 (10:24):
He's fine? Oh my god. Everybody's like all up on
his ship.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Lock.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
I was saying something earlier and I forgot.
Speaker 3 (10:30):
Put a paper under his nose, wake him up.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god, I've
been wanting to talk about this for so fucking long.
I've been wanting to talk about this for so long, y'all.
So we know, me and Timothy Chela May are really
close friends, Like this is like a thing we talk
about all the time, Like we're really close homies. Well,
I went to a birthday party and he was there
(10:54):
and I made him laugh.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
What did you do?
Speaker 2 (11:01):
I had a whole bit about poppers. I think I
had the last vile of poppers in La. By the way,
can I see it? It's in my yettie bag. Oh yeah,
we're making YETI cool again. We're making YETI cool again,
like onto the next Like we're reclaiming yetti, Like, come on.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
Gay people get yetti this year. It's the least we
can give that.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
No, like literally, like let it happen.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Like that's what I'm willing to give you. Guys from
my culture is my YETI. But as I'm not gay,
what you were just talking about being a bottom, I'm.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
More like straight guys can be fucking bottoms. Like Kai
is a fucking bottom and he's straight.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
Yeah, you can be both.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
My dad on the phone recently for the first time,
ever was just talking to me, and like I've been
talking to my family way more on the phone because
I've always been like pretty bad at talking to him
on the phone. And he was like just giving me advice,
and he was talking about my future and he's like,
you know, like any like man or woman you end
up with, And that is the first time he's ever
like said something like that, And I'm not kidding. It
(12:00):
made me laugh, Like it literally just made me laugh.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Like so funny, actually.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Like not you having Like my future to my parents
has always been so unsolid other than the fact that
like maybe I'm a giver, Like there's no other like
solid path for me other than the fact that I'm
a provider in that way. But it's so funny because
I only lend them more and more confusion about my future,
like they're never getting grandkids. No, that's that's why I
(12:31):
think I want to have kids already. Now.
Speaker 3 (12:34):
Oh dude, the X rays came back drew from when
you were at the hospital. Yeah, like, guys, like his head.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Area a piece of ships poop. I thought you were
going to show them this X ray of me. Hold
on my fucking I have to type my passcode and I.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Think it's like it's something that people will respond to
tiktoks with. I think she sounds like a really bad
take or something.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
I thought y'a were going to show them this X
ray that is mine, dude.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Like the way you look from where I'm sitting is
so crazy, Like I just wish you real. It's so
sad that Drew's not real. I have been sleeping in
Drew's bed almost every night still like that.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
It's not a bit anymore. It's like I can't sleep
without any in my room snoring next to me. It's
like growing up, I couldn't sleep at friends' houses if
their dad wasn't snoring because my dad snored so loud
that it would like lull me to sleep. And I
only broke free of that once I moved to LA
And now that Enya sleeps in my room, it's completely
ruined me. I can't sleep without loud, fucking, thunderous snoring
(13:57):
like y'all.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Or like an alcohol who like breaks everything in the crib,
like it's crazy it's bad or no, I don't feel
like it's bad.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Every you are an alcoholic dad that breaks everything in
the crib. I kind of am huh stops around break.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
Things by accident, dude, I am like genuinely just too
heavy handed and like heavy bodied, like I don't.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Remember what I was telling you to telling you and
Ryan about is it's like you need to start moving
intentionally and slowly like and I'm being dead. I'm being
genuine right now, like once you like are aware of
your movements and you.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Move, I just have no patience. No, I genuinely do
believe you. I oh, oh god, god, this is just
like a new post lightning thing. He's just, oh my god.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
He cries all the time. Now.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
No, I did sit in here two days ago and
sob in that blue chair and it's.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Like a picture the vibe of my fucking air up.
That's why it's so weird in this chair.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
I want to see the picture. You look crying crazy.
I've never cried like that in my life.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I was here like fucking maybe you needed that.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
I did, And then I tried to do like the
Indya like cry a photo and it just didn't.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
You look cute but like it's not like me though,
but you look good. I just got blessed. But it's
because I've like I feel like seeing me cry isn't
even that big of like, oh my god, she's crying.
It's like, oh she's sucking.
Speaker 3 (15:30):
Yeah, she's doing it again, she's crying.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Crazy.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
I feel like I just cry so easily.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Okay, actually this is like kind of hurting me. You
had under there, reveal yourself and like move intentionally, ship
off of me, get it out of it.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
No, but that is how I move, no matter like
I And it actually is a comment I've gotten from
partners is like I can be. I am a very
sweet person I can be, but like I just like
I just like run through life, like I literally just
moved through life so quickly. Oh my god. But yeah,
(16:20):
I just like everything must be done immediately and quickly
because if it's if it takes too fucking long, I'm
gonna kill myself. I'm gonna kill everyone I know, and
I'm gonna kill myself out anybody. I would just only
take myself.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Some guy did that to her, and ironically the pussy
looking thing.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
Don't say that, people, I become like yesterday, Kai said
my pussy smell good?
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Oh he did. He literally did stood in the doorway
of our clay room and said it out loud.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
It was crazy weird as a fuck.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
Sorry, if a woman around me is feeling bad about
their pH that damn.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Oh yeah, I should get contacts. I did yell my
pussy stinks.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Yeah, no, it literally does. It's not like fucking tuna
in there.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Like I'm about to phone a friend and call everyone
who's been in my box, and honestly, anonymously, we're gonna
have to like alter their voice so two.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
People clock it.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
I personally, and you think you're a clamjuice.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
I do have to up my body count. I think
that's what's missing from my life. Actually, I need to
go to the doctor and see why I have the
kind of night sweats that literally without so crazy.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
Is everybody night sweating right now? Leave a poll because
there's like whoa leave a comment. Leave a comment if
you night sweat, if you night sweat, because I feel
like everyone is night sweating down right now. And I
don't know if it's just the state of the world
or what, but like some ship is like really going
on in the stars, Like yeah, it.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Might be because every day we wake up to like
ingesting actually the worst most like chat GBT kind of news,
Like it literally feels like somebody's like, what's something that
could happen tomorrow that should.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Have the fabric of society and we'll do it every day?
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Should I wait? Should I show the video of the teleconesis?
My telecnesis I've been practicing on No. I sent it
to you and you didn't respond for hours.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I don't remember it.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
You were probably on fucking drugs when you saw my
teleconesis video, which is crazy because for me to trust
you with like a video of me actually practicing something
that I've been like really honing in on, is fucked up.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
I don't remember this at all. Was I at the wedding? Wait?
Where did you get a gay lesbian app notification?
Speaker 1 (18:47):
Did? I?
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Oh? My god? What the fuck it?
Speaker 1 (18:52):
I'm not kidding. I get so many gay dating app
ads on my TikTok. The only ads that is day
dating for girls. It's like the trans girl of your dream,
meet the lesbian mask of your dream, meet the like
the butch queen of your dream. Oh my god, what
(19:14):
is my phone drawing on?
Speaker 2 (19:15):
Saying to me, cluck it? Well, I stumbled upon something
that I don't think society is ready for, because if
they were ready for it, it would already it would have
already been like a thing that everybody in the world
was talking about. Like remember like that doctor that would
like fuck up people and like give them the worst
(19:36):
plastic surgery you've ever seen in your life, and it
would just be like their whole face covered in staples. Well,
it turns out it was actually really good plastic surgery.
It was just like a day after the procedure and
like the healed photos like kind of looked decent. But
I found something that is the most horrifying thing in
this doctor needs to be jailed. He needs to be
(20:00):
up six feet under the jail. He is fucking evil
for what he does to these people. But oh wait,
this is this is actually so funny. Since we were
on like a three week break, I was like, what
if I don't know how to do the podcast anymore? Like,
and I had like a lot of anxiety about like
maybe I just like forgot how to do it and
I just couldn't imagine myself doing it. And my buddy
(20:22):
was like, well, like just come prepared with good topics,
and I was like, yeah, I've been like writing topics
down for like the last three weeks, and like He's
like okay, well, like, what's your favorite topic, Like, what's
the topic you want to talk about? And I was like, oh,
eye color change surgery, like that's that's my favorite thing.
This is the topic I'm talking about now. But his
response was oh, oh okay, cool buddy.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Well also like it's because not many people would like
to sit around and be like, oh my god, stupid people.
Stupid people. These two people are stupid people. Yes, and
literally improv geniuses here eye color surgery. Boom, I want that,
I Sam.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I want that. But okay, so this is this is
a woman that just got her eye color changed to
click the video. Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no play
clickplate clickplay on the other video is playing, I know,
but click play on that one.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Yesterday I had my eye color changed.
Speaker 5 (21:23):
And you're a physician yourself, so I have a physician, yes,
so you.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
Know all about the inside information on medical procedures.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Okay, this is fucked up because he's not the only
one who needs to pay.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
And the thing is, the thing is is she had gorgeous,
like the most beautiful, like golden eyes I had ever
seen before this, and then they did that to her
and then scroll down one about ready to go in
and get your eye color changed. How are you feeling
pretty excited? It's been wanting to do this for a
long time. Oh wait, this is like a whole fucking video,
(21:55):
so you can see her eyes before and then skip
to the end. What do you think your friends are
gonna say? And their eyes are all like bloody and red,
and like I saw them like two weeked heeled, two
weeks healed post top like versions of it, and their
eyes were still red and they were like, oh yeah,
like my eyes are still scratching. And I'm like, girl,
you got like bunk as lasik and you're gonna have
(22:16):
to start putting big eyedrops in your eyes.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Even do eye color chain surgery? What the fuck does that?
It's literally resent casting new contact.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
It's basically it's basically a contact that they lift the
first layer of your iris up and they slide it underneath.
Because this guy films the whole fucking surgeries, and it
was blowing my mind.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
That's what I've never understood, even back in like doctor
Miami snapchat days.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
How is that allowed you sign consent form? No?
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I know, Like I'm sure I know about like the
legality of them being able to do it in a
way that they don't get sued by the patient. But
I mean, why is your license not being removed? Why
is there an iPhone in the operating room? Why is
the iPhone in the room? Like that's crazy. I don't
want an iPhone near my open body. Like what what
(23:03):
if you fucking dropped your shit in my fucking body?
Like what if you had one of those wildflower a
little like bejeweled things around your eye your cameras and
then when you're like doing the surgery and taking a
video of my fucking intestine, some of the gems fall out.
Speaker 3 (23:16):
Yeah, that somehow gets and I have wold.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Flower gems in my stomach forever. Who's gonna be brave
enough on OnlyFans and let a really hot girl bite
the shit out of their dick just to see what happens.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
That definitely a thing, Yeah, that must happen.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
The dark web.
Speaker 1 (23:32):
Oh never mind, I see, I didn't mean it for
king purposes. I met so that like somebody can like
reap the benefits of like capitalistic ties to that, and
it'd be like, oh, like already has an audience, And
like I was thinking it was more funny, right, not
like the kink wet.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
I got a bidet. I don't know if I told
oh you tried it.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Right, Yeah, No, I sat on that bitch for like
thirty minutes.
Speaker 3 (23:55):
Yeah, but you said it cut you.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
No, the fucking water is so sharp in these bidets.
The water is sharp, like it feels like a serrated
blade is like stabbing my buttthole.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Well, maybe it's like when you don't floss and like
your dumbs are hyper sensitive because you don't technically wipe
or ever like do anything like that. It's more I've.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
Been building my tolerance up to the bidet.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
The only time. No, I guess your buck doesn't get
used ever unless you poop.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Well that's I don't poop. It used to not get used, yeah,
but now it's getting used a lot.
Speaker 1 (24:26):
You're saying it like you're so jealous.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
It's like crazy, I actually don't. I really don't give
a fuck.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
Have there been any points where pies like hit you
up to hang out and there's just like someone else
like not once, they're just someone else's show.
Speaker 2 (24:41):
Theext Kay said gay sex in the morning is not
sexy question mark question mark. Here he goes like I
need to throw up. You're not bagging me bro lo
l as if I would ever fuck you? Loo? Who
said you'd be fucking me? You saggy bottom window this?
Then he said Poke restaurant. I saw last night raw
explosion explosion nasty. You're literally nasty. I want your raw explosion? Wait? Yes,
(25:05):
can I come over right now? Hello? Answer me, I'm close.
True answer, I have a boner answer. Where are you?
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Like?
Speaker 2 (25:11):
Can you drop a fucking pin? Fuck? Fuck fuck emoji? Fuck?
All right, I'm gonna head out. Lol. No, I want you.
I know, not happening, Okay, I don't give a fuck
A middle finger emoji.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
So crazy. It was at one point it was just
me texting him.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
For like an hour. I wish I was joking. It
was like at a wedding, cool whatever.
Speaker 3 (25:46):
We didn't ask, So I really don't give a I
really don't give a fuck. I'm playing around when I
text you that ship at like three am.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Yeah, And then he sent me a couple stretching and
he sent any of.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
That to me too. He's me and you'rew have caught
Kai twice this week sending us these same exact text
and we I was so tempted, if not yesterday, like
two days ago. I wanted to, like both of us
text him the same things and like see if we
could get the same replies out of Kai. And then
I was like, oh, that's kind of mean, because if
you got caught doing that, I think you'd actually be like.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Me texting you both.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
We should stuff to stretch.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
And the picture's crazy, what insert it? But let's look
at my topics. Let's see what I have to talk about.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
Well, I got tagged in this thing that it was like, oh,
this a literature phenomenon of women versus women, and like,
how like most people in our earth, this bitch is
not in this field. But she was just saying she
notices a lot of women say women for women and women.
(27:00):
Are you literally just moaning and groaning at that, like
at the thought of women.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
I'm obsessed with women. So you can continue. Ky really
is obsessed now that you saw you saw my eyes dilate, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
So you go and keep going. I actually am intrigued
by this. Oh.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
She was just talking about how a lot of people
don't know how to differentiate the two, and she wonders
if over time, like yeah, like that will just see
it kind of blend into like we I feel like
there's probably a lot of words like that that we
all just mispronounced and nobody really gives a fuck. Like subconsciously,
we're always mispronouncing.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
Things, and you gotta humber yourself.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Yeah, just like umber yourself and you will continually grow.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Yeah, because everything, everything is coming to frutition soon, Like
it's all coming to frutition.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
The thing is, I feel like we started that joke
between our phone group only because all of us mispronounced
things to each other, Yeah, all the time, because we.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
Know it's all Josiah. It's all Josiah. Like Josiah has
come up with every single one of those except for fruitition.
Fuck what was Rain's like, expondently, Eric, I love expedition.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
But yeah, I got tagged in that a bunch, and
honestly it's kind of fucked up, because, yeah, that's it.
I just can't. I can't pronounce certain things. I'm sorry.
There's so many things that I mispronounced, and I'm trying
my best. I know how to say volume now right
because volume volume, Yeah, volume, did I say it right
(28:40):
the first time?
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Volume said it wrong? At one point?
Speaker 1 (28:44):
Volume, Well, because I Josiah made fun of me for
so long.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
The valuume. Yeah, like valuume anxiety drug.
Speaker 1 (28:54):
But I see, I didn't grow up in the nasty,
fucking uncared for a little disgusting places, y'all. I grew
up and I grew up with parents who taught me
right from wrong, So I wasn't interacting with valume.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
It's actually like a drug for anxiety disorder. So you're
fucked up. Wow, I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
I was really fun.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
I literally don't give a fuck. Bitch. I'm gonna go
on a drive around LA and throw my prozac at people.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
I was.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
I literally think everyone just needs to get on prozac.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Not Actually, I was crying laughing the other day because
like I saw like a video. This isn't why I
was crying laughing, but I saw like a video of
like someone with cancer shaving their head, like their friend
was shaving their head, And I was laughing because I
was like, bitch, if you have cancer and you asked
(29:43):
me to shave your head, do not expect me to
shave mine with you, Like, do not have that because
I do not have that in me. I'm sorry if
that makes me a bad person. But like, don't try
to trick me into shaving my head, Like, do not
do it, and don't expect me to do it alongside
with you. I will shave your head for I will,
but I don't think i'll be buzzing mine.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
You wouldn't shave your head for me, and you will
not be taking off her wig either.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Yeah, I forgot you wear a wag.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
It's a new one.
Speaker 3 (30:12):
It does look really nice.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
You got a new haircut or a new wig cut?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Yeah, I went and got it trimmed because it was
growing weirdly. Yeah, I have a newer wig. I have
like a.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
Very like extensive wig cut at It was a part of.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
My Wally wheelchair pre order, but the wag came earlier.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Wait what my Wally you know? And Wally wig.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
A wig came with my Wally wheelchair. I don't know why.
That's so crazy. It was like a combination deal, but
it was. I don't think they're doing it anymore. So
if you guys try to get it, that's you're not
going to get that combination. It was like one of
those things where the website had a big countdown that
was following you around the website while you look, why
do websites do that? Like can the rear real chill?
The hack out? Like why everything you put in a
(30:54):
car on some sites, it literally it feels like a
fucking bomb is about to go off because there's suddenly
like I think, I think like a timer of twenty minutes,
and I have twenty minutes to buy everything I can
dream of before someone else is gonna buy it. No
one else is gonna buy it right now.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
And something I wonder, if it takes it off the site,
if you put it in your car.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
It takes it out of your car, so like.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
No, no, no, I mean like if you put something
in your car, if it takes it off the site
for twenty minutes so no one else can put it
in their car.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
It gets put on hold, and I'm like ho, but
like imagine having that fuck is hunting me virtually for
the sweater, Like who wants this sweater? That fucking bad
that they're just like watching it on hold and they're
like ooh the second this gets out, like I've never
had something get taken out of my car and like
somebody scoops it up like it's not a fucking in
(31:44):
real life sample cell bitch, it's fucking endless online propaganda
of like resold.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
Did you see the Balenciaga sample sale that a bunch
of people got invited to. There was a Balenciaga sample
sale and it was fucking crazy the price is of
these Balenciaga pieces, and it was it was actually like
really disgusting and eye opening to see, like the up
charge these brands.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Do for this charge for a sample sale.
Speaker 2 (32:10):
No no, no, no no no no no, no, give me.
The pieces were originally four grand and they sold for
sixty eight dollars at the sample sale and I was like, yeah,
and that's like selling them above at costs, I'm sure, which,
like it was o crazy, it was so crazy, it
was greening me the fuck out. And I was like, damn, damn,
(32:31):
damn damn.
Speaker 1 (32:32):
I mean yeah, that's also like when you go to
outlet stores, even like it's crazy, but also some of
that shit even for sample sales. Now, I kind of
wonder if they've like hit the outlet game and a
lot of these brands are just making pieces for that,
because there are some sample sales. Not Valenciaga, I didn't
see that one, but there are some sample sales where
(32:52):
I'm like, the whole point of this is it's leftover
stock and samples like the sample of a product or
like different like and that would be like varying sizes.
Maybe the ND seem is different. Like that's my assumption
of a sample. So why is there like this unseen
product but you have like three hundred of them? That's
(33:13):
not a sample. But I guess a lot of things do.
Like you do have to order in bulk. But I
have a hard time believing that, Like.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
It took three hundred iterations to get one piece right, Like, girl,
they don't give a fuck that bad? Is this funny?
A ran through side? What does it have? Callous is
on his hand?
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Oh that's good. I like that.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
I don't go okay. I said that to one of
my friends and they were like, I don't.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Get it because they just watch right.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
Well, no sides like jerk off blow, they don't do
top or bottom. So callous is on his hand, like
he was jerking off a dick so much he got gallot.
Callis is on his hand.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
But like, wouldn't a side interact in sacks just as
much as like average person, So wouldn't we like kind
of all have callouses.
Speaker 2 (34:03):
No, I'm saying ran through, You're missing the point of
the ran through.
Speaker 1 (34:07):
Yeah, but what about his mouth?
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Like I ran through bottom? Oh he has a loose,
soggy fucking hole or a ran through top. Oh, he
has friction burns on his dick, like oh I ran
through side. He's got calluses on his hand.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Do you think you could actually get callouses from like
jerking off that much? There's no way.
Speaker 3 (34:23):
I mean, I think he and I.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
But I've gotten friction burns on my penis when I
was like thirteen from jerking off like six times in
one day.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
Well, I've gotten friction burns from having too much sex.
But like, wait on your hand on my penis. Oh,
I don't think that's I don't think that's Sadly that uncommon,
especially for people who are having like mid sex at all.
Friction burns are like not uncommon, I don't think. But
like I mean from your hand.
Speaker 2 (34:46):
And I was thirteen and I thought I had STDs
and I literally had never had sex, and I was like,
oh my god, it's over for me. I have herpes
like I have open swords on my penis STD.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
The first boy on the PLA to give himself.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
Well, potted it in my body right right.
Speaker 1 (35:06):
Well, I don't think that really makes sense because you
have to acknowledge the mouth. Oh, I was gonna show
you this song that would work if the side was
somebody who like nobody wants it from God.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
I fucking love Red Bull, y'all. I'm back on Red Bull.
I'm back on my bullshit. I need advice. I got
on or I'm getting on chantics today to stop smoking dick.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
I'm actually so curious if it works.
Speaker 3 (35:33):
Umm, it will it works on my friend it was like,
very very addicted to cigarettes, longtime smoker.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
I don't think I'm ready to quit, like all my
I'm just not there yet, you know, Like I can
recognize problems and I'm very aware of them. It's okay, guys,
calm down.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
I think just a little little less. I think you
should cut your dose in half.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
I know. That's what me and my therapist were talking about.
She was like, you should get CBD jo. It's because
I smoke so much weed. But I genuinely need people
to understand at this point. For the most part, especially
when I'm just like sitting around the house, it becomes
like it's become now the way I used to smoke cigarettes,
which is why I stop smoking cigarettes, because I'm just
an oral fixation person and I genuinely do Kai I
(36:19):
could open his eyes wide as fuck at that.
Speaker 3 (36:21):
By the way, I was excited by Drew's the anticipation
of Drews reaction.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
But I I just love smoking.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Literally, I missed You'll so fucking much.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
You have no idea, Yeah I did, I did, But
it was really nice to not be on my phone
because that's it. I like genuinely haven't been using my
phone the past month, and I think I kind of
want to, like keep to that. I'm back to just
watching tornado videos when I'm on my phone, and that's
good for my brain. It's insightful knowledge, it's intelligent.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
Like there, I have at least like four days a
week where my screen time is just two hours, which
is fucking lit. It's it's probably no, its probably crazy,
but no, I have like three days a week where
my screen time is like less than three hours, like
bordering too, Like it's honestly so lit. But then I
just have my mega dose days where I just get
it all in in one one sitting, one doom, one
(37:22):
doom scroll get all the information in intel.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
Me saying my screen time's been down. Oh wait no,
this doesn't count. So much of it as YouTube and
I listen to Oh kind of man, it's YouTube and
Hulu because I have been binging Mormon house.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
Wise that fucking shit. Why did no one fucking tell
us about that show? I'm actually kind of pissed because
I know that show is good as Secret Lives of
Mormon Wives is a goddamn reality TV show masterpiece. It
is so rotted and gutted and terrible and these like
you can tell like what makes it so good? I'm like,
(37:59):
I really thought about this. What makes it so good
is all of the girls on that show recognize that
they are in a reality TV show and they know
how to make good reality TV. And like people aren't
afraid to be the villain, and like we always need
the villain. Like that's why drag Race sucks right now,
is because everybody wants to be Miss Congeniality. That's why
the new season of Love Island sucks is because everybody's
(38:20):
trying to be like, oh, you're my girl, Like, oh,
I love you so much. Secret Lives of Mormon Wives,
like they're all evil and they know they're evil and
they play up the evil and some of them actually
don't know they're evil, Like Whitney is truly truly an
evil person, which I can like respect because like, well
I just.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Started season two and like I'm not that far in,
but remember your sister in law was telling us that, like,
apparently there's a switch up, like because we started watching it,
because when we went to Utah, I was talking about
Love Island. But I was kind of falling off of
Love Island, which I kind of have been because as
most people know, this season is just like what the
fuck is happening? Like literally, none of y'all like each other.
(38:57):
This is weird, like in terms of coupling, Like I
don't care for any of the couples. Last year I
think genuinely was like a feat of dating reality TV
and it won't be be So I was falling off
and she told us to start Secret Lives of Mormon Housewives.
That show is so good and Taylor, the first episode
(39:20):
is the craziest, Like, girl, what the fuck? And is
It's like being back in Miami and going out with
my family and hearing what everyone's That's why.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
I like it. It's like just family drama.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
It literally just feels like that's Oh he's.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
In prison again for his third du.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
Oh my god, no learn and then when he comes out,
it's like we love him. Like it literally it's so
just like it's not I don't even because I don't
think it's necessarily rotted. Obviously, there are a lot of
parts of it that are rotted, because what the fuck
do you mean? It's just the basis of this friend
group is your online presence together. And I do think
they all have real relationships, but that's a whole other thing.
(40:01):
But it really is just some local shit. That's why
it's good. It's like they're actually Yeah, but I'm curious
if the second and third season are that crazy. But
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Like Taylor, Taylor, like they tried to make her a
fucking villain. Like also, if you haven't watched, like, sorry,
this conversation means nothing to you, but it's very important
to me to have this conversation with ya. Taylor. They
tried to make her a fucking villain. Yeah, And like
she's the realist bitch on that show, Dimmy too.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
She's the most normal I like Demi I really like.
To me, my favorites are Taylor and Macy so far
like those to me are the two girls, And I
fuck with Jen. She's like the hair girl, the hairstylest girl.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Her new salons are crazy too.
Speaker 1 (40:45):
I mean again, I think I'm so obsessed with all
of these women because literally all of them remind me
of people in my family, Like Jen reminds me of
my one aunt who is like he repeating information doesn't
make you the samet but god bless. Like literally that's
like my like everyone in that show with someone of
my family, and I love it and sadly like, I
(41:07):
don't think I'm Whitney, but they're my biggest fears that
I am Whitney.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
Yeah, and Witney.
Speaker 1 (41:13):
Bit I think there are parts, but I think there's
parts of Whitney and all of us because I've like,
I don't know, I think you get to a Whitney
when you let your people pleasing tendencies take a hold
of you and put you on moral high ground, which
I think is really easy to get lost in because
it's just like I'm helping people, I can't be doing
the bobbling boh, like it's like no because you're helping
people for you exactly.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
Also, he has got green aura with flies. You've got
a fly flying around. See, I'm telling you tuna. You
smell the tuna filling up the fucking space.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
Because I actually, I will say, I think I'm the
cleanest and.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
You are the most neurotically clean person I've ever met
in my life. It's actually like annoying how often you
clean yourself, Like it actually affects my day. Sometimes you
don't think, I swear to God, I would tell you, no.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
I know, I don't think, but that's what I'm saying.
It's like, it's actually crazy. Oh fuck, I was thinking
of something. Oh, I have a scab on my head
and I cannot express how happy I am because I've
been picking the fuck out of it and like it
probably will lead to infection, but that's okay, because that's
even better because for me, a wound that I can
pick at and then have to tend to is amazing.
(42:22):
I'm gonna say something else. There's something about my OCD
I like realized, like a thing I do to myself,
But I can't remember what.
Speaker 2 (42:31):
You're fucking weird, realm.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
What the scab feels so good, and you know what
I mean, like I miss bleaching, get crazy burned scabs
from burning my scalp and picking at those scabs. My
birth mom one of the like few things I remember
her saying to me is as like a kid. I
had to have been in like fourth grade and I
was in her closet and I said something, we're in
(42:53):
the roads. No, you know what's crazy.
Speaker 2 (42:58):
I've literally like gay, pen sexual, like trisexual, whatever.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
I've never been in the closet. But you can't make
me not say ship like what like I don't give
a fuck, give me your box, give me your fucking
ill what even call aween? Or I don't want to
say that cock mm.
Speaker 2 (43:14):
Hm, cock and balls, cock and ball torture. We never
talked about cock and ball torture. I love see, maybe
we could have a whole segment. We'll do j O
I CBT, Jake jack offf instructional video and cock and
ball torture.
Speaker 3 (43:34):
I can. I can definitely do the cock and ball
torture stuff because I've done a ton of research.
Speaker 1 (43:38):
You've done a research, but you haven't practiced, so it's
not really a passion because if you like, if it
was I just don't believe in Like, to me, that's
like going to college and studying, but you're not taking
any of that knowledge.
Speaker 3 (43:49):
And can you not say that I have a poster
syndrome about this.
Speaker 2 (43:53):
Does hair spray cause cancer? Does hairspray cost?
Speaker 1 (43:56):
Everything? Does?
Speaker 2 (43:58):
Because for real, like it's gonna happen, like the hairspray
mixed with the foam chair. I sprayed it and it
got all over my face and it's like really freaking
me the fuck out.
Speaker 1 (44:08):
You're fine? Do you know there was somebody who put
gorilla glue on their head like four years ago when
they were fine?
Speaker 2 (44:15):
Wait, what was the outcome of that? Did she have
to pull her hair out? I don't know why did
you get it out?
Speaker 1 (44:20):
I think she had to go like to the hospital
and they use like a mass rape.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
I hate how clowned on she was, Like that was
a very dumb thing to do, Like we can all
recognize that as a society. But like looking back, I'm like,
I mean I've seen crazier shit.
Speaker 1 (44:36):
Yeah, I mean I've done stupid or shit.
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Yeah I put mo Yeah it was pretty crazy. I
take kind of that back. I kind of take that
back like.
Speaker 1 (44:46):
That, like I thought such dumb things. But I really
did get her from the beginning because there's that one
Joe that's like the gorilla or like whatever. It's like
fucking gorilla. So I was like, oh, maybe that's what
she thought I was. But like, does gorilla glue should
just make hair stuff? Yeah, I feel like they would
(45:08):
make me and.
Speaker 2 (45:09):
That might that might really be very confusing for.
Speaker 1 (45:11):
Future actually yeah, and it also might be like a
legal issue, yeah, because the mix up would be crazy.
But you just don't sell the hair glue and helm
depot like no one's going home.
Speaker 2 (45:19):
You know that redhead girl that loves gelling her hair down.
Speaker 1 (45:23):
The one who was in the army.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
Yeah, yeah, that's it. I also love started her own jel.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
I love our new vocabulary. It is like you know
so and so, Yeah, like we are. It's going to
be so confusing in the future because I don't know
that person. I don't know her name, but I know
and I know the room she used to sit in.
You take me to that room. I know my way around.
Speaker 2 (45:45):
I know she started a gel brand, and I know
her carpet is beige, and I know she loves slicking
that damn hair back. Oh hell, no, guys, guys, this
is just temporary. Something else is gonna go here. Maybe
we'll see what happens. But that was really scary.
Speaker 1 (46:09):
That's the second time that's happened when me and kay
first put it up.
Speaker 2 (46:12):
You should take it down before read the studio.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
Because it's gonna crumble and I'm gonna fucking kill myself.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
Guys. Do you like the new studio? I love it?
Speaker 1 (46:19):
Or the new art cover? The cover guys?
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Oh yeah, yeah?
Speaker 3 (46:22):
Is that done already?
Speaker 2 (46:23):
No? No, but she might go here, she might go there.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
She might have to go up here because I think
she might be too big, or she could go here.
Speaker 2 (46:33):
Yeah, say on one of these two shelves too. But yeah,
Enya did her damn thing with the cover, and.
Speaker 3 (46:39):
Then kay Cam is gonna go like right here on
the right to the right of me to get my
good angle.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
Okay, there's no good angle.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Baby, I'm gonna say, because oh you can that good luck?
Speaker 3 (46:49):
No, that's just continue that won't hurt Guys.
Speaker 2 (46:52):
I love gay bars.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
You love gay bars? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (46:55):
I love gayble.
Speaker 1 (46:56):
I know Drew's trying to convince me to go to
a gay bar with him this week, and are I
allowed to go to a gay bar.
Speaker 2 (47:01):
Though, yes you're gay, not that kind.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
Actually, no, that's literally a lie. My taste in men
is like a Twins taste in men. So actually I
shouldn't go to a gay bar because I'll be like, hey, hey, okay,
Well my media of the week is I watched the
Peebee docuseries and that was amazing. I watched the Ali
Willis documentary right after and that was really good. Mormon Housewives, Yeah,
(47:33):
that's what I'm about to do right now and finish
the set. They're the cover art.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
My media is Under Your Spell by snow Strippers, Grins
by Charlie XCX, and twenty four Hours by Sky Ferrara.
That fucking song in your twenty I'll give you all
one more just because I'm a good person. There's like
(48:02):
this little this song is having such a little moment
right now that no one's talking about. But Party for
You by Charlie XCX is a banger.
Speaker 1 (48:11):
What is that?
Speaker 2 (48:12):
It's a small little song. But no, that song is
so good.
Speaker 1 (48:15):
That song at the end of Bottoms I genuinely think
was the best use of a song in this generation
in a movie ever, Like that was the most And.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
At do bottoms or was she just in it?
Speaker 1 (48:31):
I think she wrote it. She co wrote it with Emily.
Who is this number that keeps calling me because I'm
literally not gonna answer, Like you need to leave me
a fucking.
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Voice moment you need Instagram Jazz Lobbyist and then Jasmine
Demo by Jay Paul. Oh that fucking album. That fucking album, y'all,
Oh my god, formative, Oh.
Speaker 1 (48:53):
My music media is nothing in the world by Love
or nothing in the world like Love by Lobby's Pray,
which Drew hates.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
That song really feels like I'm at the Fair in
the nineteen forties. It feels like Cocomon Trees with the hat.
Speaker 1 (49:10):
It's such a good song, but it does make me
feel like what's the b York music video where she's
dancing around the street you fall off single Wow, But
(49:31):
that song reminds me of that, like labby song, Be
Like a Woman by Chris Rainbow, Star of the Story
Part two by Veda, and Favorite Daughter by Lord. Let's
hear it for the Man of.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
Business Conference, It's here for the land Music. Welcome back
to Emergency Intercom. Thank you guys for watching. We will
see you next week.
Speaker 1 (50:11):
Yeah, We're on Wednesdays now, baby, Yeah, we're.
Speaker 2 (50:14):
On Wednesdays now. Surprise. Sorry, mm hmmm
Hi God, Welcome back to emergency Intercom.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Drew.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Drew is still well. He's off of like a few
meds right now, including like perks oxies. There's that new
one that people rp ten. Is that what?
Speaker 3 (00:37):
I don't know. I don't do drugs.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Yeah, he's off a few things, but he's okay for
the most part. It's just we went we went camping,
and while we were out of state, a storm came
in and Drew was trying to avoid the car because
we had a rental car and he didn't get insurance.
He never gets insurance on our rentals, and he was
running out to make sure hail didn't break the windshield
(00:59):
and he got struck by lightning.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Roll the fucking clip of me getting struck by goddamn lighting. Bro,
This ship is so fucking embarrassing.
Speaker 4 (01:07):
Like it.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
It's not like you need to reframe it. And I've
been trying to explain it.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
It's fucking karma. It's fucking karma for me laughing at
people getting struck by lightning and trees getting exploded. It's karma.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
But three times that's lucky. Now I'm trying to help him.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
It's not lucky.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
That's that is the opposite of it's like, my body
is burned, seventy percent of my body is burned.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Well, I saw on TikTok shop you could get this
really good alo vera for like thirty cents and it's
a gallon, so you should just get that and just
rub it off.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Just shut the fuck up.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
Hello, not cool.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
It's ever since the lightning hit him, he's been acting
so means.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Going fucking fault. This girl's fucking fault. No no, no, no, no,
no no no. Gay guy gets struck.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
By life, becomes incredibly funny, very like, very peaceful, very tranquil. No,
becomes the angriest, almost straighter version of the gay guy
that was there.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Fucking mad too. You would be mad too if your
hair got burnt off your fucking.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Scal All right, let's roll the clip again.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
I think you're just I'm not kidding. You do have
to re like reshape that or like refashionate, reconfigure it
in your mind. God is giving you the lemons are getting.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Struck, dude.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Now, your ears are probably just gonna you wanna hear that.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
It's the sound of your skin cracking.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Okay, you're you know when you like burst your ear
drum and you can hear like.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
I literally have that right now? Is out? What that
is this ear? If I press like my temple, it
feels like it's like the ear drum is going in
and out.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Like it's kind of impressive how you've made your hair
look like one of the hairs styles from like Killer.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Clowns in the face Cynthia, I look like Cynthia. Kind
that too, No, Cynthia from Rugras Guys Wicked Too comes
out in November, and that's.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
Not that far away.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
We're serious.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
You haven't like addressed the elephant in the room.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Inya, hey all, it's something bad happened to his brain.
The idea that the lightning her juice straight is really flick.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
I think that's what it feels like ever since you've
been all wrapped up. It's maybe it's because I'm missing
your gay face, because you just have you have.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
A gay face, you know, I literally don't know.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
You don't.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
No, I don't think you have a gay face. Some
people do have gay face, though you have a bit
of you have, like look at your face, Yeah, if
you look at your face for more than three seconds, And.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
I do think he has gay penis.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Penis can't be.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Big and happy.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Doesn't even make sense.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
No, it makes sense.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Well, we did go camping in Utah, and I am
not kidding. I fully understand how some motherfucker made up
like Mormonism out there, Like I really get it. We
were only out there for like three days, and I
genuinely mind you they don't have as much weat or
smoke as much weat as I put down. Oh boohoo,
(04:42):
nothing's changed. I'm going to rehab soon, but I like
literally get it because being out there, I genuinely felt
like I started to build, like I think I have telekinesis.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
No, it is such a special place and I hate
talking about it because it is like America's best cup secret.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Uta, America's best cup secret.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
No, it really is because everybody avoids it because of
like the Mormonism ship and like the hyper religion, which
I fully understand, but also t is like the pride
in fucking Utah, specifically Salt Lake City and the surrounding
area is honestly so fire like the amount of pride
or flags hanging.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Out your pride flags. I mean.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
The was actually really amazing, Like it really.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
The thing is he's not me.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
I'm not joking. I'm literally not the.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
One time you're expressing game pride in all serious.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
I'm wrapped in fucking gauze fun.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
They were really about their gay ship there. They did
not play granted. Their major city literally looks like if
if I took a Vivands and started my animal crossing
island and then gave up like an hour. Yeah, because
there's like then the rest.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Is like the city is also a fucking bowl and
it's like a smog pit. Like it literally it's dirtier
there than it is in La And it feels crazy
to say, but like like the amount of smog in
the air is crazy. But like also that opens up
another conversation. I literally don't give a shit, Like like
(06:31):
the air quality could be like the worst it's ever been,
Like I literally don't care.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Sur try to try to be normal.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Take it off.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
The look that you just gave me. It was so
like helpless.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
I don't know, Like, well, that's also because like, girl,
let's face it, the air quality is not We're not
getting making in pristine times right now. We're gonna be
like Dan. The air quality in twenty twenty five was
so good, like I can breathe out there. Oh, I
did just order my Wally chair. They're finally they have
(07:07):
the pre order Wally wheelchair.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
Nice.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
The one mine has an iPad in it, a rose toy.
They I was gonna.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Say mine has a dildos. I'm a bottom. Now I'm exploring,
believe it or not. I wasn't before, but after the
lightning all I can't do something. No, it's really really
really expanded things. No, honestly, it's like Popper is like
in a weird way.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Like getting struck by lightning. We should make it a
fat like the hot water.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Challenge hot water challenge job.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Wait, what's the last time challenge?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Job?
Speaker 1 (07:49):
The last time we had a trend like that that was.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Like devious and like making SMaL.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Kind of innocent, because I genuinely do think like I
don't think the person who started hot Water Challenge is innocent,
but I think like the girl I guess the last
time was that girl feeding her dad truros tempo pro
bar lows turos.
Speaker 5 (08:16):
Wow wa Yeah, that fucking bomb blowing up in his mouth.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
It's so crazy, it's really fucking crazy. But yeah, no,
someone needs to make another trend where they make like
mustard gas in their microwave in the kitchen. Actually, someone does.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Not need to say no, because isn't there that guy
who literally terrorizes on There's a bunch of guys who
do it, who like just going on meg and stuff and.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Get kids to put Oh yeah, they put in their
microwave and they explode and they destroy their microwaves. Dude,
My Instagram reels like have been so insane recently, Like
it's literally just like the most evil prank you've ever
seen in your life. Like it's not even funny, it's
just like it's just being mean to people. Like it's
(09:08):
literally like going up to someone and being like, hey,
like would answer answer genuine Hey, would you want to
go to the movie and hang out with me today?
Or would you want one hundred.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
Dollars I'll take a hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
No, no, no, say the friend or say that.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Said answer genuinely.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
I'm gonna say, say you would want to go to that?
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Okay, I'm gonna go with you to the movies.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
And then he goes on and he's like, well, you
fucking loser, like, oh, you want to hang out with
another man? And it's like this poor old soul that
really just wants a friend, and I feel so bad.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
For you craziers. Most of those people, it's not even
about them wanting a fucking friend. It's they see an
iPhone and it's like, at first, it's like, how fucking known?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
That's like, wait, I'm being recorded, I have I know.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I would hate for someone to go to the movies alone.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Yeah, double it or give it to the next person.
Did irreparable damages to society because everyone's now on their
best behavior on camera.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Like, I'm sorry, I'm not doubling it. I'm taking the
hundred dollars. I'm not going to the fucking movies.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
I'm doubling it.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
I'm doubling it.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
Too, doubling it and giving it to the next person. Yeah, yeah, no,
is it cash.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
I'm a giver, so whatever some people are taking.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Baby, he's the gibber and jow.
Speaker 5 (10:20):
He is the.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Tap Are you can you breathe like, are you all right?
Speaker 1 (10:24):
He's fine? Oh my god. Everybody's like all up on
his ship.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Lock.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
I was saying something earlier and I forgot.
Speaker 3 (10:30):
Put a paper under his nose, wake him up.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god, I've
been wanting to talk about this for so fucking long.
I've been wanting to talk about this for so long, y'all.
So we know, me and Timothy Chela May are really
close friends, Like this is like a thing we talk
about all the time, Like we're really close homies. Well,
I went to a birthday party and he was there
(10:54):
and I made him laugh.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
What did you do?
Speaker 2 (11:01):
I had a whole bit about poppers. I think I
had the last vile of poppers in La. By the way,
can I see it? It's in my yettie bag. Oh yeah,
we're making YETI cool again. We're making YETI cool again,
like onto the next Like we're reclaiming yetti, Like, come on.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
Gay people get yetti this year. It's the least we
can give that.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
No, like literally, like let it happen.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Like that's what I'm willing to give you. Guys from
my culture is my YETI. But as I'm not gay,
what you were just talking about being a bottom, I'm.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
More like straight guys can be fucking bottoms. Like Kai
is a fucking bottom and he's straight.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
Yeah, you can be both.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
My dad on the phone recently for the first time,
ever was just talking to me, and like I've been
talking to my family way more on the phone because
I've always been like pretty bad at talking to him
on the phone. And he was like just giving me advice,
and he was talking about my future and he's like,
you know, like any like man or woman you end
up with, And that is the first time he's ever
like said something like that, And I'm not kidding. It
(12:00):
made me laugh, Like it literally just made me laugh.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Like so funny, actually.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Like not you having Like my future to my parents
has always been so unsolid other than the fact that
like maybe I'm a giver, Like there's no other like
solid path for me other than the fact that I'm
a provider in that way. But it's so funny because
I only lend them more and more confusion about my future,
like they're never getting grandkids. No, that's that's why I
(12:31):
think I want to have kids already. Now.
Speaker 3 (12:34):
Oh dude, the X rays came back drew from when
you were at the hospital. Yeah, like, guys, like his head.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
Area a piece of ships poop. I thought you were
going to show them this X ray of me. Hold
on my fucking I have to type my passcode and I.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Think it's like it's something that people will respond to
tiktoks with. I think she sounds like a really bad
take or something.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
I thought y'a were going to show them this X
ray that is mine, dude.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Like the way you look from where I'm sitting is
so crazy, Like I just wish you real. It's so
sad that Drew's not real. I have been sleeping in
Drew's bed almost every night still like that.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
It's not a bit anymore. It's like I can't sleep
without any in my room snoring next to me. It's
like growing up, I couldn't sleep at friends' houses if
their dad wasn't snoring because my dad snored so loud
that it would like lull me to sleep. And I
only broke free of that once I moved to LA
And now that Enya sleeps in my room, it's completely
ruined me. I can't sleep without loud, fucking, thunderous snoring
(13:57):
like y'all.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Or like an alcohol who like breaks everything in the crib,
like it's crazy it's bad or no, I don't feel
like it's bad.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Every you are an alcoholic dad that breaks everything in
the crib. I kind of am huh stops around break.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
Things by accident, dude, I am like genuinely just too
heavy handed and like heavy bodied, like I don't.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Remember what I was telling you to telling you and
Ryan about is it's like you need to start moving
intentionally and slowly like and I'm being dead. I'm being
genuine right now, like once you like are aware of
your movements and you.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Move, I just have no patience. No, I genuinely do
believe you. I oh, oh god, god, this is just
like a new post lightning thing. He's just, oh my god.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
He cries all the time. Now.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
No, I did sit in here two days ago and
sob in that blue chair and it's.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Like a picture the vibe of my fucking air up.
That's why it's so weird in this chair.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
I want to see the picture. You look crying crazy.
I've never cried like that in my life.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I was here like fucking maybe you needed that.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
I did, And then I tried to do like the
Indya like cry a photo and it just didn't.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
You look cute but like it's not like me though,
but you look good. I just got blessed. But it's
because I've like I feel like seeing me cry isn't
even that big of like, oh my god, she's crying.
It's like, oh she's sucking.
Speaker 3 (15:30):
Yeah, she's doing it again, she's crying.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Crazy.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
I feel like I just cry so easily.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Okay, actually this is like kind of hurting me. You
had under there, reveal yourself and like move intentionally, ship
off of me, get it out of it.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
No, but that is how I move, no matter like
I And it actually is a comment I've gotten from
partners is like I can be. I am a very
sweet person I can be, but like I just like
I just like run through life, like I literally just
moved through life so quickly. Oh my god. But yeah,
(16:20):
I just like everything must be done immediately and quickly
because if it's if it takes too fucking long, I'm
gonna kill myself. I'm gonna kill everyone I know, and
I'm gonna kill myself out anybody. I would just only
take myself.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Some guy did that to her, and ironically the pussy
looking thing.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
Don't say that, people, I become like yesterday, Kai said
my pussy smell good?
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Oh he did. He literally did stood in the doorway
of our clay room and said it out loud.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
It was crazy weird as a fuck.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
Sorry, if a woman around me is feeling bad about
their pH that damn.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Oh yeah, I should get contacts. I did yell my
pussy stinks.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Yeah, no, it literally does. It's not like fucking tuna
in there.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Like I'm about to phone a friend and call everyone
who's been in my box, and honestly, anonymously, we're gonna
have to like alter their voice so two.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
People clock it.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
I personally, and you think you're a clamjuice.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
I do have to up my body count. I think
that's what's missing from my life. Actually, I need to
go to the doctor and see why I have the
kind of night sweats that literally without so crazy.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
Is everybody night sweating right now? Leave a poll because
there's like whoa leave a comment. Leave a comment if
you night sweat, if you night sweat, because I feel
like everyone is night sweating down right now. And I
don't know if it's just the state of the world
or what, but like some ship is like really going
on in the stars, Like yeah, it.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Might be because every day we wake up to like
ingesting actually the worst most like chat GBT kind of news,
Like it literally feels like somebody's like, what's something that
could happen tomorrow that should.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Have the fabric of society and we'll do it every day?
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Should I wait? Should I show the video of the teleconesis?
My telecnesis I've been practicing on No. I sent it
to you and you didn't respond for hours.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I don't remember it.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
You were probably on fucking drugs when you saw my
teleconesis video, which is crazy because for me to trust
you with like a video of me actually practicing something
that I've been like really honing in on, is fucked up.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
I don't remember this at all. Was I at the wedding? Wait?
Where did you get a gay lesbian app notification?
Speaker 1 (18:47):
Did? I?
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Oh? My god? What the fuck it?
Speaker 1 (18:52):
I'm not kidding. I get so many gay dating app
ads on my TikTok. The only ads that is day
dating for girls. It's like the trans girl of your dream,
meet the lesbian mask of your dream, meet the like
the butch queen of your dream. Oh my god, what
(19:14):
is my phone drawing on?
Speaker 2 (19:15):
Saying to me, cluck it? Well, I stumbled upon something
that I don't think society is ready for, because if
they were ready for it, it would already it would have
already been like a thing that everybody in the world
was talking about. Like remember like that doctor that would
like fuck up people and like give them the worst
(19:36):
plastic surgery you've ever seen in your life, and it
would just be like their whole face covered in staples. Well,
it turns out it was actually really good plastic surgery.
It was just like a day after the procedure and
like the healed photos like kind of looked decent. But
I found something that is the most horrifying thing in
this doctor needs to be jailed. He needs to be
(20:00):
up six feet under the jail. He is fucking evil
for what he does to these people. But oh wait,
this is this is actually so funny. Since we were
on like a three week break, I was like, what
if I don't know how to do the podcast anymore? Like,
and I had like a lot of anxiety about like
maybe I just like forgot how to do it and
I just couldn't imagine myself doing it. And my buddy
(20:22):
was like, well, like just come prepared with good topics,
and I was like, yeah, I've been like writing topics
down for like the last three weeks, and like He's
like okay, well, like, what's your favorite topic, Like, what's
the topic you want to talk about? And I was like, oh,
eye color change surgery, like that's that's my favorite thing.
This is the topic I'm talking about now. But his
response was oh, oh okay, cool buddy.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Well also like it's because not many people would like
to sit around and be like, oh my god, stupid people.
Stupid people. These two people are stupid people. Yes, and
literally improv geniuses here eye color surgery. Boom, I want that,
I Sam.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I want that. But okay, so this is this is
a woman that just got her eye color changed to
click the video. Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no play
clickplate clickplay on the other video is playing, I know,
but click play on that one.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Yesterday I had my eye color changed.
Speaker 5 (21:23):
And you're a physician yourself, so I have a physician, yes,
so you.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
Know all about the inside information on medical procedures.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Okay, this is fucked up because he's not the only
one who needs to pay.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
And the thing is, the thing is is she had gorgeous,
like the most beautiful, like golden eyes I had ever
seen before this, and then they did that to her
and then scroll down one about ready to go in
and get your eye color changed. How are you feeling
pretty excited? It's been wanting to do this for a
long time. Oh wait, this is like a whole fucking video,
(21:55):
so you can see her eyes before and then skip
to the end. What do you think your friends are
gonna say? And their eyes are all like bloody and red,
and like I saw them like two weeked heeled, two
weeks healed post top like versions of it, and their
eyes were still red and they were like, oh yeah,
like my eyes are still scratching. And I'm like, girl,
you got like bunk as lasik and you're gonna have
(22:16):
to start putting big eyedrops in your eyes.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Even do eye color chain surgery? What the fuck does that?
It's literally resent casting new contact.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
It's basically it's basically a contact that they lift the
first layer of your iris up and they slide it underneath.
Because this guy films the whole fucking surgeries, and it
was blowing my mind.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
That's what I've never understood, even back in like doctor
Miami snapchat days.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
How is that allowed you sign consent form? No?
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I know, Like I'm sure I know about like the
legality of them being able to do it in a
way that they don't get sued by the patient. But
I mean, why is your license not being removed? Why
is there an iPhone in the operating room? Why is
the iPhone in the room? Like that's crazy. I don't
want an iPhone near my open body. Like what what
(23:03):
if you fucking dropped your shit in my fucking body?
Like what if you had one of those wildflower a
little like bejeweled things around your eye your cameras and
then when you're like doing the surgery and taking a
video of my fucking intestine, some of the gems fall out.
Speaker 3 (23:16):
Yeah, that somehow gets and I have wold.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Flower gems in my stomach forever. Who's gonna be brave
enough on OnlyFans and let a really hot girl bite
the shit out of their dick just to see what happens.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
That definitely a thing, Yeah, that must happen.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
The dark web.
Speaker 1 (23:32):
Oh never mind, I see, I didn't mean it for
king purposes. I met so that like somebody can like
reap the benefits of like capitalistic ties to that, and
it'd be like, oh, like already has an audience, And
like I was thinking it was more funny, right, not
like the kink wet.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
I got a bidet. I don't know if I told
oh you tried it.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Right, Yeah, No, I sat on that bitch for like
thirty minutes.
Speaker 3 (23:55):
Yeah, but you said it cut you.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
No, the fucking water is so sharp in these bidets.
The water is sharp, like it feels like a serrated
blade is like stabbing my buttthole.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Well, maybe it's like when you don't floss and like
your dumbs are hyper sensitive because you don't technically wipe
or ever like do anything like that. It's more I've.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
Been building my tolerance up to the bidet.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
The only time. No, I guess your buck doesn't get
used ever unless you poop.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Well that's I don't poop. It used to not get used, yeah,
but now it's getting used a lot.
Speaker 1 (24:26):
You're saying it like you're so jealous.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
It's like crazy, I actually don't. I really don't give
a fuck.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
Have there been any points where pies like hit you
up to hang out and there's just like someone else
like not once, they're just someone else's show.
Speaker 2 (24:41):
Theext Kay said gay sex in the morning is not
sexy question mark question mark. Here he goes like I
need to throw up. You're not bagging me bro lo
l as if I would ever fuck you? Loo? Who
said you'd be fucking me? You saggy bottom window this?
Then he said Poke restaurant. I saw last night raw
explosion explosion nasty. You're literally nasty. I want your raw explosion? Wait? Yes,
(25:05):
can I come over right now? Hello? Answer me, I'm close.
True answer, I have a boner answer. Where are you?
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Like?
Speaker 2 (25:11):
Can you drop a fucking pin? Fuck? Fuck fuck emoji? Fuck?
All right, I'm gonna head out. Lol. No, I want you.
I know, not happening, Okay, I don't give a fuck
A middle finger emoji.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
So crazy. It was at one point it was just
me texting him.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
For like an hour. I wish I was joking. It
was like at a wedding, cool whatever.
Speaker 3 (25:46):
We didn't ask, So I really don't give a I
really don't give a fuck. I'm playing around when I
text you that ship at like three am.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Yeah, And then he sent me a couple stretching and
he sent any of.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
That to me too. He's me and you'rew have caught
Kai twice this week sending us these same exact text
and we I was so tempted, if not yesterday, like
two days ago. I wanted to, like both of us
text him the same things and like see if we
could get the same replies out of Kai. And then
I was like, oh, that's kind of mean, because if
you got caught doing that, I think you'd actually be like.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Me texting you both.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
We should stuff to stretch.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
And the picture's crazy, what insert it? But let's look
at my topics. Let's see what I have to talk about.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
Well, I got tagged in this thing that it was like, oh,
this a literature phenomenon of women versus women, and like,
how like most people in our earth, this bitch is
not in this field. But she was just saying she
notices a lot of women say women for women and women.
(27:00):
Are you literally just moaning and groaning at that, like
at the thought of women.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
I'm obsessed with women. So you can continue. Ky really
is obsessed now that you saw you saw my eyes dilate, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
So you go and keep going. I actually am intrigued
by this. Oh.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
She was just talking about how a lot of people
don't know how to differentiate the two, and she wonders
if over time, like yeah, like that will just see
it kind of blend into like we I feel like
there's probably a lot of words like that that we
all just mispronounced and nobody really gives a fuck. Like subconsciously,
we're always mispronouncing.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
Things, and you gotta humber yourself.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Yeah, just like umber yourself and you will continually grow.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Yeah, because everything, everything is coming to frutition soon, Like
it's all coming to frutition.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
The thing is, I feel like we started that joke
between our phone group only because all of us mispronounced
things to each other, Yeah, all the time, because we.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
Know it's all Josiah. It's all Josiah. Like Josiah has
come up with every single one of those except for fruitition.
Fuck what was Rain's like, expondently, Eric, I love expedition.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
But yeah, I got tagged in that a bunch, and
honestly it's kind of fucked up, because, yeah, that's it.
I just can't. I can't pronounce certain things. I'm sorry.
There's so many things that I mispronounced, and I'm trying
my best. I know how to say volume now right
because volume volume, Yeah, volume, did I say it right
(28:40):
the first time?
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Volume said it wrong? At one point?
Speaker 1 (28:44):
Volume, Well, because I Josiah made fun of me for
so long.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
The valuume. Yeah, like valuume anxiety drug.
Speaker 1 (28:54):
But I see, I didn't grow up in the nasty,
fucking uncared for a little disgusting places, y'all. I grew
up and I grew up with parents who taught me
right from wrong, So I wasn't interacting with valume.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
It's actually like a drug for anxiety disorder. So you're
fucked up. Wow, I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
I was really fun.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
I literally don't give a fuck. Bitch. I'm gonna go
on a drive around LA and throw my prozac at people.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
I was.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
I literally think everyone just needs to get on prozac.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Not Actually, I was crying laughing the other day because
like I saw like a video. This isn't why I
was crying laughing, but I saw like a video of
like someone with cancer shaving their head, like their friend
was shaving their head, And I was laughing because I
was like, bitch, if you have cancer and you asked
(29:43):
me to shave your head, do not expect me to
shave mine with you, Like, do not have that because
I do not have that in me. I'm sorry if
that makes me a bad person. But like, don't try
to trick me into shaving my head, Like, do not
do it, and don't expect me to do it alongside
with you. I will shave your head for I will,
but I don't think i'll be buzzing mine.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
You wouldn't shave your head for me, and you will
not be taking off her wig either.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Yeah, I forgot you wear a wag.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
It's a new one.
Speaker 3 (30:12):
It does look really nice.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
You got a new haircut or a new wig cut?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Yeah, I went and got it trimmed because it was
growing weirdly. Yeah, I have a newer wig. I have
like a.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
Very like extensive wig cut at It was a part of.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
My Wally wheelchair pre order, but the wag came earlier.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Wait what my Wally you know? And Wally wig.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
A wig came with my Wally wheelchair. I don't know why.
That's so crazy. It was like a combination deal, but
it was. I don't think they're doing it anymore. So
if you guys try to get it, that's you're not
going to get that combination. It was like one of
those things where the website had a big countdown that
was following you around the website while you look, why
do websites do that? Like can the rear real chill?
The hack out? Like why everything you put in a
(30:54):
car on some sites, it literally it feels like a
fucking bomb is about to go off because there's suddenly
like I think, I think like a timer of twenty minutes,
and I have twenty minutes to buy everything I can
dream of before someone else is gonna buy it. No
one else is gonna buy it right now.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
And something I wonder, if it takes it off the site,
if you put it in your car.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
It takes it out of your car, so like.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
No, no, no, I mean like if you put something
in your car, if it takes it off the site
for twenty minutes so no one else can put it
in their car.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
It gets put on hold, and I'm like ho, but
like imagine having that fuck is hunting me virtually for
the sweater, Like who wants this sweater? That fucking bad
that they're just like watching it on hold and they're
like ooh the second this gets out, like I've never
had something get taken out of my car and like
somebody scoops it up like it's not a fucking in
(31:44):
real life sample cell bitch, it's fucking endless online propaganda
of like resold.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
Did you see the Balenciaga sample sale that a bunch
of people got invited to. There was a Balenciaga sample
sale and it was fucking crazy the price is of
these Balenciaga pieces, and it was it was actually like
really disgusting and eye opening to see, like the up
charge these brands.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Do for this charge for a sample sale.
Speaker 2 (32:10):
No no, no, no no no no no, no, give me.
The pieces were originally four grand and they sold for
sixty eight dollars at the sample sale and I was like, yeah,
and that's like selling them above at costs, I'm sure, which,
like it was o crazy, it was so crazy, it
was greening me the fuck out. And I was like, damn, damn,
(32:31):
damn damn.
Speaker 1 (32:32):
I mean yeah, that's also like when you go to
outlet stores, even like it's crazy, but also some of
that shit even for sample sales. Now, I kind of
wonder if they've like hit the outlet game and a
lot of these brands are just making pieces for that,
because there are some sample sales. Not Valenciaga, I didn't
see that one, but there are some sample sales where
(32:52):
I'm like, the whole point of this is it's leftover
stock and samples like the sample of a product or
like different like and that would be like varying sizes.
Maybe the ND seem is different. Like that's my assumption
of a sample. So why is there like this unseen
product but you have like three hundred of them? That's
(33:13):
not a sample. But I guess a lot of things do.
Like you do have to order in bulk. But I
have a hard time believing that, Like.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
It took three hundred iterations to get one piece right, Like, girl,
they don't give a fuck that bad? Is this funny?
A ran through side? What does it have? Callous is
on his hand?
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Oh that's good. I like that.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
I don't go okay. I said that to one of
my friends and they were like, I don't.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Get it because they just watch right.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
Well, no sides like jerk off blow, they don't do
top or bottom. So callous is on his hand, like
he was jerking off a dick so much he got gallot.
Callis is on his hand.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
But like, wouldn't a side interact in sacks just as
much as like average person, So wouldn't we like kind
of all have callouses.
Speaker 2 (34:03):
No, I'm saying ran through, You're missing the point of
the ran through.
Speaker 1 (34:07):
Yeah, but what about his mouth?
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Like I ran through bottom? Oh he has a loose,
soggy fucking hole or a ran through top. Oh, he
has friction burns on his dick, like oh I ran
through side. He's got calluses on his hand.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Do you think you could actually get callouses from like
jerking off that much? There's no way.
Speaker 3 (34:23):
I mean, I think he and I.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
But I've gotten friction burns on my penis when I
was like thirteen from jerking off like six times in
one day.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
Well, I've gotten friction burns from having too much sex.
But like, wait on your hand on my penis. Oh,
I don't think that's I don't think that's Sadly that uncommon,
especially for people who are having like mid sex at all.
Friction burns are like not uncommon, I don't think. But
like I mean from your hand.
Speaker 2 (34:46):
And I was thirteen and I thought I had STDs
and I literally had never had sex, and I was like,
oh my god, it's over for me. I have herpes
like I have open swords on my penis STD.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
The first boy on the PLA to give himself.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
Well, potted it in my body right right.
Speaker 1 (35:06):
Well, I don't think that really makes sense because you
have to acknowledge the mouth. Oh, I was gonna show
you this song that would work if the side was
somebody who like nobody wants it from God.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
I fucking love Red Bull, y'all. I'm back on Red Bull.
I'm back on my bullshit. I need advice. I got
on or I'm getting on chantics today to stop smoking dick.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
I'm actually so curious if it works.
Speaker 3 (35:33):
Umm, it will it works on my friend it was like,
very very addicted to cigarettes, longtime smoker.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
I don't think I'm ready to quit, like all my
I'm just not there yet, you know, Like I can
recognize problems and I'm very aware of them. It's okay, guys,
calm down.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
I think just a little little less. I think you
should cut your dose in half.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
I know. That's what me and my therapist were talking about.
She was like, you should get CBD jo. It's because
I smoke so much weed. But I genuinely need people
to understand at this point. For the most part, especially
when I'm just like sitting around the house, it becomes
like it's become now the way I used to smoke cigarettes,
which is why I stop smoking cigarettes, because I'm just
an oral fixation person and I genuinely do Kai I
(36:19):
could open his eyes wide as fuck at that.
Speaker 3 (36:21):
By the way, I was excited by Drew's the anticipation
of Drews reaction.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
But I I just love smoking.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Literally, I missed You'll so fucking much.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
You have no idea, Yeah I did, I did, But
it was really nice to not be on my phone
because that's it. I like genuinely haven't been using my
phone the past month, and I think I kind of
want to, like keep to that. I'm back to just
watching tornado videos when I'm on my phone, and that's
good for my brain. It's insightful knowledge, it's intelligent.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
Like there, I have at least like four days a
week where my screen time is just two hours, which
is fucking lit. It's it's probably no, its probably crazy,
but no, I have like three days a week where
my screen time is like less than three hours, like
bordering too, Like it's honestly so lit. But then I
just have my mega dose days where I just get
it all in in one one sitting, one doom, one
(37:22):
doom scroll get all the information in intel.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
Me saying my screen time's been down. Oh wait no,
this doesn't count. So much of it as YouTube and
I listen to Oh kind of man, it's YouTube and
Hulu because I have been binging Mormon house.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
Wise that fucking shit. Why did no one fucking tell
us about that show? I'm actually kind of pissed because
I know that show is good as Secret Lives of
Mormon Wives is a goddamn reality TV show masterpiece. It
is so rotted and gutted and terrible and these like
you can tell like what makes it so good? I'm like,
(37:59):
I really thought about this. What makes it so good
is all of the girls on that show recognize that
they are in a reality TV show and they know
how to make good reality TV. And like people aren't
afraid to be the villain, and like we always need
the villain. Like that's why drag Race sucks right now,
is because everybody wants to be Miss Congeniality. That's why
the new season of Love Island sucks is because everybody's
(38:20):
trying to be like, oh, you're my girl, Like, oh,
I love you so much. Secret Lives of Mormon Wives,
like they're all evil and they know they're evil and
they play up the evil and some of them actually
don't know they're evil, Like Whitney is truly truly an
evil person, which I can like respect because like, well
I just.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Started season two and like I'm not that far in,
but remember your sister in law was telling us that, like,
apparently there's a switch up, like because we started watching it,
because when we went to Utah, I was talking about
Love Island. But I was kind of falling off of
Love Island, which I kind of have been because as
most people know, this season is just like what the
fuck is happening? Like literally, none of y'all like each other.
(38:57):
This is weird, like in terms of coupling, Like I
don't care for any of the couples. Last year I
think genuinely was like a feat of dating reality TV
and it won't be be So I was falling off
and she told us to start Secret Lives of Mormon Housewives.
That show is so good and Taylor, the first episode
(39:20):
is the craziest, Like, girl, what the fuck? And is
It's like being back in Miami and going out with
my family and hearing what everyone's That's why.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
I like it. It's like just family drama.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
It literally just feels like that's Oh he's.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
In prison again for his third du.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
Oh my god, no learn and then when he comes out,
it's like we love him. Like it literally it's so
just like it's not I don't even because I don't
think it's necessarily rotted. Obviously, there are a lot of
parts of it that are rotted, because what the fuck
do you mean? It's just the basis of this friend
group is your online presence together. And I do think
they all have real relationships, but that's a whole other thing.
(40:01):
But it really is just some local shit. That's why
it's good. It's like they're actually Yeah, but I'm curious
if the second and third season are that crazy. But
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Like Taylor, Taylor, like they tried to make her a
fucking villain. Like also, if you haven't watched, like, sorry,
this conversation means nothing to you, but it's very important
to me to have this conversation with ya. Taylor. They
tried to make her a fucking villain. Yeah, And like
she's the realist bitch on that show, Dimmy too.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
She's the most normal I like Demi I really like.
To me, my favorites are Taylor and Macy so far
like those to me are the two girls, And I
fuck with Jen. She's like the hair girl, the hairstylest girl.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Her new salons are crazy too.
Speaker 1 (40:45):
I mean again, I think I'm so obsessed with all
of these women because literally all of them remind me
of people in my family, Like Jen reminds me of
my one aunt who is like he repeating information doesn't
make you the samet but god bless. Like literally that's
like my like everyone in that show with someone of
my family, and I love it and sadly like, I
(41:07):
don't think I'm Whitney, but they're my biggest fears that
I am Whitney.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
Yeah, and Witney.
Speaker 1 (41:13):
Bit I think there are parts, but I think there's
parts of Whitney and all of us because I've like,
I don't know, I think you get to a Whitney
when you let your people pleasing tendencies take a hold
of you and put you on moral high ground, which
I think is really easy to get lost in because
it's just like I'm helping people, I can't be doing
the bobbling boh, like it's like no because you're helping
people for you exactly.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
Also, he has got green aura with flies. You've got
a fly flying around. See, I'm telling you tuna. You
smell the tuna filling up the fucking space.
Speaker 1 (41:43):
Because I actually, I will say, I think I'm the
cleanest and.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
You are the most neurotically clean person I've ever met
in my life. It's actually like annoying how often you
clean yourself, Like it actually affects my day. Sometimes you
don't think, I swear to God, I would tell you, no.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
I know, I don't think, but that's what I'm saying.
It's like, it's actually crazy. Oh fuck, I was thinking
of something. Oh, I have a scab on my head
and I cannot express how happy I am because I've
been picking the fuck out of it and like it
probably will lead to infection, but that's okay, because that's
even better because for me, a wound that I can
pick at and then have to tend to is amazing.
(42:22):
I'm gonna say something else. There's something about my OCD
I like realized, like a thing I do to myself,
But I can't remember what.
Speaker 2 (42:31):
You're fucking weird, realm.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
What the scab feels so good, and you know what
I mean, like I miss bleaching, get crazy burned scabs
from burning my scalp and picking at those scabs. My
birth mom one of the like few things I remember
her saying to me is as like a kid. I
had to have been in like fourth grade and I
was in her closet and I said something, we're in
(42:53):
the roads. No, you know what's crazy.
Speaker 2 (42:58):
I've literally like gay, pen sexual, like trisexual, whatever.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
I've never been in the closet. But you can't make
me not say ship like what like I don't give
a fuck, give me your box, give me your fucking
ill what even call aween? Or I don't want to
say that cock mm.
Speaker 2 (43:14):
Hm, cock and balls, cock and ball torture. We never
talked about cock and ball torture. I love see, maybe
we could have a whole segment. We'll do j O
I CBT, Jake jack offf instructional video and cock and
ball torture.
Speaker 3 (43:34):
I can. I can definitely do the cock and ball
torture stuff because I've done a ton of research.
Speaker 1 (43:38):
You've done a research, but you haven't practiced, so it's
not really a passion because if you like, if it
was I just don't believe in Like, to me, that's
like going to college and studying, but you're not taking
any of that knowledge.
Speaker 3 (43:49):
And can you not say that I have a poster
syndrome about this.
Speaker 2 (43:53):
Does hair spray cause cancer? Does hairspray cost?
Speaker 1 (43:56):
Everything? Does?
Speaker 2 (43:58):
Because for real, like it's gonna happen, like the hairspray
mixed with the foam chair. I sprayed it and it
got all over my face and it's like really freaking
me the fuck out.
Speaker 1 (44:08):
You're fine? Do you know there was somebody who put
gorilla glue on their head like four years ago when
they were fine?
Speaker 2 (44:15):
Wait, what was the outcome of that? Did she have
to pull her hair out? I don't know why did
you get it out?
Speaker 1 (44:20):
I think she had to go like to the hospital
and they use like a mass rape.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
I hate how clowned on she was, Like that was
a very dumb thing to do, Like we can all
recognize that as a society. But like looking back, I'm like,
I mean I've seen crazier shit.
Speaker 1 (44:36):
Yeah, I mean I've done stupid or shit.
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Yeah I put mo Yeah it was pretty crazy. I
take kind of that back. I kind of take that
back like.
Speaker 1 (44:46):
That, like I thought such dumb things. But I really
did get her from the beginning because there's that one
Joe that's like the gorilla or like whatever. It's like
fucking gorilla. So I was like, oh, maybe that's what
she thought I was. But like, does gorilla glue should
just make hair stuff? Yeah, I feel like they would
(45:08):
make me and.
Speaker 2 (45:09):
That might that might really be very confusing for.
Speaker 1 (45:11):
Future actually yeah, and it also might be like a
legal issue, yeah, because the mix up would be crazy.
But you just don't sell the hair glue and helm
depot like no one's going home.
Speaker 2 (45:19):
You know that redhead girl that loves gelling her hair down.
Speaker 1 (45:23):
The one who was in the army.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
Yeah, yeah, that's it. I also love started her own jel.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
I love our new vocabulary. It is like you know
so and so, Yeah, like we are. It's going to
be so confusing in the future because I don't know
that person. I don't know her name, but I know
and I know the room she used to sit in.
You take me to that room. I know my way around.
Speaker 2 (45:45):
I know she started a gel brand, and I know
her carpet is beige, and I know she loves slicking
that damn hair back. Oh hell, no, guys, guys, this
is just temporary. Something else is gonna go here. Maybe
we'll see what happens. But that was really scary.
Speaker 1 (46:09):
That's the second time that's happened when me and kay
first put it up.
Speaker 2 (46:12):
You should take it down before read the studio.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
Because it's gonna crumble and I'm gonna fucking kill myself.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
Guys. Do you like the new studio? I love it?
Speaker 1 (46:19):
Or the new art cover? The cover guys?
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Oh yeah, yeah?
Speaker 3 (46:22):
Is that done already?
Speaker 2 (46:23):
No? No, but she might go here, she might go there.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
She might have to go up here because I think
she might be too big, or she could go here.
Speaker 2 (46:33):
Yeah, say on one of these two shelves too. But yeah,
Enya did her damn thing with the cover, and.
Speaker 3 (46:39):
Then kay Cam is gonna go like right here on
the right to the right of me to get my
good angle.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
Okay, there's no good angle.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Baby, I'm gonna say, because oh you can that good luck?
Speaker 3 (46:49):
No, that's just continue that won't hurt Guys.
Speaker 2 (46:52):
I love gay bars.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
You love gay bars? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (46:55):
I love gayble.
Speaker 1 (46:56):
I know Drew's trying to convince me to go to
a gay bar with him this week, and are I
allowed to go to a gay bar.
Speaker 2 (47:01):
Though, yes you're gay, not that kind.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
Actually, no, that's literally a lie. My taste in men
is like a Twins taste in men. So actually I
shouldn't go to a gay bar because I'll be like, hey, hey, okay,
Well my media of the week is I watched the
Peebee docuseries and that was amazing. I watched the Ali
Willis documentary right after and that was really good. Mormon Housewives, Yeah,
(47:33):
that's what I'm about to do right now and finish
the set. They're the cover art.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
My media is Under Your Spell by snow Strippers, Grins
by Charlie XCX, and twenty four Hours by Sky Ferrara.
That fucking song in your twenty I'll give you all
one more just because I'm a good person. There's like
(48:02):
this little this song is having such a little moment
right now that no one's talking about. But Party for
You by Charlie XCX is a banger.
Speaker 1 (48:11):
What is that?
Speaker 2 (48:12):
It's a small little song. But no, that song is
so good.
Speaker 1 (48:15):
That song at the end of Bottoms I genuinely think
was the best use of a song in this generation
in a movie ever, Like that was the most And.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
At do bottoms or was she just in it?
Speaker 1 (48:31):
I think she wrote it. She co wrote it with Emily.
Who is this number that keeps calling me because I'm
literally not gonna answer, Like you need to leave me
a fucking.
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Voice moment you need Instagram Jazz Lobbyist and then Jasmine
Demo by Jay Paul. Oh that fucking album. That fucking album, y'all,
Oh my god, formative, Oh.
Speaker 1 (48:53):
My music media is nothing in the world by Love
or nothing in the world like Love by Lobby's Pray,
which Drew hates.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
That song really feels like I'm at the Fair in
the nineteen forties. It feels like Cocomon Trees with the hat.
Speaker 1 (49:10):
It's such a good song, but it does make me
feel like what's the b York music video where she's
dancing around the street you fall off single Wow, But
(49:31):
that song reminds me of that, like labby song, Be
Like a Woman by Chris Rainbow, Star of the Story
Part two by Veda, and Favorite Daughter by Lord. Let's
hear it for the Man of.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
Business Conference, It's here for the land Music. Welcome back
to Emergency Intercom. Thank you guys for watching. We will
see you next week.
Speaker 1 (50:11):
Yeah, We're on Wednesdays now, baby, Yeah, we're.
Speaker 2 (50:14):
On Wednesdays now. Surprise. Sorry, mm hmmm
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