suffering is inevitable

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Drew and enya went to the high school musical high school then came back to la and got crossfaded

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:17):
This is our block pass called emergency inter Call.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
Welcome.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
Drew took me to a gay bar last time, and
then he crashed.

Speaker 2 (00:25):
Out on me.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
You hit him?

Speaker 3 (00:28):
He almost did.

Speaker 2 (00:29):
He wanted that.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
We've gone a bit with the term if he didn't,
did you hit him?

Speaker 2 (00:35):
Why? I just didn't like it didn't feel right in
the moment because I could tell he wanted it.

Speaker 1 (00:42):
Oh, I've been there. Yeah, what was the crash out?

Speaker 3 (00:45):
I just started screaming at me.

Speaker 2 (00:47):
Yeah, Like I was screaming gay slurs at him. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (00:52):
I was like, dude, what the it's you know, it's funny?

Speaker 2 (00:55):
Is our friend? Uh? That came up in the cowboy hat.
Texted my other friend and was like, hey, like did
I hear KAI say that Drew is by lmao? And

(01:16):
I was like, what's fucking funny about? What's funny about
the potential of me being by? Like? What what is
so silly about it?

Speaker 1 (01:25):
I really can't get on his case because that's me
as fun.

Speaker 2 (01:27):
I'm like like, I actually.

Speaker 1 (01:29):
Like I am sorry, Like I am, I'm like, okay, girl,
Like rolling my eyes is not real because first of all,
it's just gluttony. Call it what it is. And then
second of all, it's like.

Speaker 2 (01:42):
Drew just no, I mean also Kai is by famously
famously Yeah, but I just only hook.

Speaker 3 (01:49):
Up with girls.

Speaker 1 (01:50):
Yeah no, I mean that's brave. Still, it's still to
take up space is still very brave.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
No, and the bike lot.

Speaker 3 (01:58):
I don't take out that much space. I don't take
that much.

Speaker 1 (02:01):
Oh yeah, Like so I I agree with him. I
would laugh. I would laugh at the assumption that you're
by and like, I'm sorry, I can I hate that.
I can think of people who like it just makes
me laugh because I'm like, did I.

Speaker 2 (02:13):
Hear Kai Drew is by l M A O.

Speaker 3 (02:17):
L and he got his across? Okay, that's good.

Speaker 2 (02:24):
Yeah, because he's gay also.

Speaker 1 (02:28):
Damn okay, Like, well, maybe it was coming from a
place that like there's a girl who wants to like,
but this guy is famously do go after you?

Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yeah? True, Like I just have that like like feminine
quality to me that girls are attracted to, like I'm
very emotionally intelligent, Like I hear them, I listen to
them like I love women.

Speaker 1 (02:52):
Yeah. Basically, what you do is you become gay guy
struck by lightning and you're you're you're doing what they
called like act of listening when you're being responsive in
the middle of it. But you're like, right, right part,
No exactly.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
It's your boyfriend that that part.

Speaker 3 (03:11):
One time I caught Drew being like, I'm gay, let's
go try on bras at them all.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
You caught him doing that?

Speaker 3 (03:18):
Yeah, he was just telling girls like, oh, I could
just tell you like if these bras like.

Speaker 1 (03:23):
Going with girls.

Speaker 2 (03:25):
I hate that he brought that up, but like one
of my like RIZ tactics is bringing girls to Victoria's
Secret and playing with their boobs in the changing room.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
Do you like, do you act like he used to
work there or something.

Speaker 2 (03:39):
You're just like, no, no, no, I'm just like I'm
a boob connoisseur, Like I can look at your I
can see your boobs are what a quadruple d an
F No.

Speaker 1 (03:54):
I was thinking, like, h, I'm up in the ruse.
H exists, Yeah, everything exists. Don't question anything now, like seriously,
and it's not AI, It's real.

Speaker 2 (04:04):
It's literally real.

Speaker 1 (04:04):
The girls with the biggest booze you've ever seen on
walking down a hallway. That's real.

Speaker 3 (04:09):
That the thing that I see on my phone is real.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
It's actually so true. That's so true there was. I
saw this music video recently and one of the girls
had like the biggest knockers I've ever seen, Like.

Speaker 3 (04:21):
What was giant which what was the name of the video?
What was the name of.

Speaker 2 (04:25):
Clap your Hands by Edward Skeletricks Kai Stop. But she
had the biggest do hunger rugle as I've ever seen,
Like they were giant, like literally ginormous, And I was like,
there's no way, Like I cannot believe that those are real,
Like there's absolutely no way. And then it turns out
I think they're a breastplate, but I can't tell for sure,
but like in my head, I was like, oh, I

(04:45):
like one.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
I actually it's that big.

Speaker 2 (04:48):
I want big booms.

Speaker 1 (04:49):
That would be so painful. Also, like, just like the
shirt situation, like when my boobs were bigger, I think
there are some people who are just born to have
big boobs and then some people who like it genuinely.
Is a misplace meant in like a misjudgment because I
don't think I was ever meant to have boobs as
big as my boobs were, Like I always felt like
like a bar wench at every weighting moment, I just

(05:11):
felt like a bar wunch.

Speaker 2 (05:12):
I felt like a He deleted the video, which the
skill big Boob One.

Speaker 1 (05:22):
Probably because it went against guidelines because.

Speaker 2 (05:25):
They weren't out. They were in like a bikini, and
I hate that the woman that a woman's body is
sexualized in.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
That way and it's being shadow man.

Speaker 2 (05:33):
Yeah, like it's really giving, Like girls should be able
to show their boobs and nipples.

Speaker 1 (05:38):
Like to me, Drew crashed out last night and also
yesterday with me. He crashed out before that because we
had a stressful day and then decided because of that. Actually,
we just decided we were going to drink like day drenk.
Like we were like, we just need to day drink
because we have access to a pool. That is what
a pool was for.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
Yeah, oh my god, I forgot about we.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
E's got a double shot Margarita.

Speaker 2 (06:02):
Mind ju y'all. I'm like, I'm low key like an
alcoholic now like period, Like I love alcohol, Like I'm
like alcohol is so good and fun, like I love
that shit.

Speaker 1 (06:15):
Drewid me keep calling I guess like I'm more of
a drug addict than you are an alcoholic. You're not
a true alcoholic girl.

Speaker 2 (06:21):
No, I literally still have like one drink a week, like,
but that's just really shocking for me.

Speaker 1 (06:27):
I know. That's why I was saying to him yesterday
when you start talking about it, I was like, dude,
you we are both the same where when we start
engaging in something, we have to make it public known
because we're like, this is bad, This is bad.

Speaker 2 (06:39):
I shouldn't be touching me. You know it's bad. Keep
me in check.

Speaker 1 (06:42):
Also, not only that, it's just literally because we for
real don't do shit, like we're literally just permits for
the most part, which I am trying to change because
I think last twenty twenty three, I think I was
really good at being social, and then the beginning of
twenty twenty four, like March hit, the darkness.

Speaker 2 (07:02):
Came, the Darkest coming too.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
To bring back everything that like the light.

Speaker 2 (07:10):
Is coming to bring back everything the darkness.

Speaker 3 (07:13):
Did you just whisper the Darkness game under your breath?

Speaker 2 (07:16):
No?

Speaker 3 (07:17):
He did.

Speaker 1 (07:18):
He didn't. Did you do that? Why?

Speaker 2 (07:21):
Why would it be crazy if I did?

Speaker 3 (07:23):
It's just insane.

Speaker 2 (07:24):
I didn't. I didn't actually say that.

Speaker 3 (07:26):
You didn't. You just said it came, the darkness came. Yeah, Oh,
I thought you were talking.

Speaker 1 (07:30):
About being depressed on his phone, still looking for that
fucking music. But he's gone phone right in his face. Bro,
like it's two inches from his space. Those glasses on.
Are you near sighted or far sighted? Why do you
never take off your glasses?

Speaker 3 (07:44):
I'm near sighted and I have problems with association and
if I don't have my glasses on.

Speaker 2 (07:49):
Yeah, that was fucked up.

Speaker 3 (07:50):
But also I think I look handsome in though.

Speaker 2 (07:53):
No, you look really good. You really do? You look
really good in glasses, Like it's really they're fitting.

Speaker 1 (07:59):
Oh but yeah. Basically, now me and Drew are back
to being social, which means we're people who like are
terrified all the time and neither of us know how
to navigate in situations. So we were by the pool
and I got our first drinks and then Drew was like, oh,
they were doing last call.

Speaker 2 (08:15):
We got a double Margarita by the way, and I
hit the joint. Oh my god. I really am like,
oh my god, like hearing it out loud, like I'm
really crashing out.

Speaker 1 (08:24):
I was looking at my notes before I came in here,
and I was like, oh, let me see what I
had written down to talk about, and that was it,
and was like, oh my god, Drew, I got Drew
crossfaded as fuck loll and I was like, that's my
brag of the week, Like that's.

Speaker 2 (08:37):
I'm like, well broke my sobriety.

Speaker 1 (08:40):
It is so fucking awesome. I love when Drew. Also,
to be fair, I don't ever ask you to smoke, Like,
actually I asked you to smoke with me all the time,
but you've only ever smoked when one. I like haven't
really asked, and Drew will randomly like get the courage
to do it, and it literally it feels like both
of us lock in and I'm just like I know
what I need to do, which is just exist here
with him and act like that didn't happen and don't

(09:02):
comment on it and just exists with him and be
funny he he ha ha. And we were having such
an awesome time.

Speaker 2 (09:08):
No, it was literally a blast, Like we finished the
double margarita double and it was fucking rancid, Like it
was the nastiest fucking thing I put in my body ever.
And then I go into my little snack bag and
I pulled out chips and sour airheads and like there's
all of these like yummy little things, like oh my god,
I love like I literally love a snack and I
was just like snacking crazy. But the macarons, macaroons, macarons,

(09:32):
what is it? Macarn macrooms, macaroons, Pigma micron. Only artists
will get that one.

Speaker 1 (09:39):
Wha.

Speaker 2 (09:41):
But I like pulled those out. I pulled those out,
and like the one I ate was legitimately like the
most vile, like cursed mush like it was raspberry and
like I love raspberries, but like.

Speaker 1 (10:00):
Under UV eleven and like eighty degree heat for an hour.

Speaker 2 (10:04):
Yeah, but like raby, all.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
Were fucking nasty.

Speaker 2 (10:07):
Also, the coffee one was good. But anyways, we're getting
off track. We're getting off track, but I'm like, wait,
like should we get another one? The guy comes around,
He's like, oh, last call, last call, last call, and
we're like yeah, we shouldn't. And then like we kind
of sit in silence for a second. We look at
each other and we're like went and wrong, my gosh, Like,
let's get one more. So I like hobbled, like literally

(10:28):
hobbled back to this fucking like pool bar.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
Because I'm too scared to go because I'm the one
who said no to him. And then I was like
I can't go up early.

Speaker 2 (10:38):
And so I'm like literally like stumbling, like like it's
so embarrassing because I'm like literally high.

Speaker 1 (10:43):
He's literally just cross faded for the first time ever.

Speaker 2 (10:47):
And I like set the two cups on the bar
and like there's like a moment of silence and like
I was waiting for them to like ask me, like
this hit the conversation. Like I was sitting there and
I was like we were like staring at each other,
was almost like intimate in a way, and like I'm
standing there and he it wasn't, No, it was not.
It was like the opposite.

Speaker 1 (11:06):
And then I'm just like, two, this guy's too.

Speaker 3 (11:09):
I was in it for you.

Speaker 2 (11:12):
I get like nervous, and so I start like I'm like, hey,
you get like another drink and and he's like I say,
but I say it loud, like I say direction, but
I like mumble like crazy, and he's like what, like
what are you saying? And these people are notoriously like
mean as fuck, Like broh.

Speaker 1 (11:31):
Was that fucking chateau? They're fucking mean there, They're sod.

Speaker 2 (11:34):
Their haters, they're ups, and like I mumbled, I love it.

Speaker 3 (11:37):
Did I ever tell you when I got destroyed by
like a really hot gig guy that worked at a
bar at Cafe Mogador. When I got breakfast, I was
with Mason. We were at it was like really busy,
we're eating at the bar, and I got like a
like a huge breakfast.

Speaker 2 (11:52):
You literally weren't so like, don't like I don't know
what you're making.

Speaker 3 (11:55):
This is true, stop doing that. I was like, so
I ate the whole thing really quickly because I'm on
this medication where I have to eat a lot hungry,
and I ate it maybe like four times as fast
as this was.

Speaker 2 (12:08):
Like like recently, like a year ago, a year ago, okay.

Speaker 3 (12:13):
Okay, but I was on it was a different medication
was it also had a side effect where I have
to eat a lot. Of course all of my medications
weirdly had this side effect. But I ate the whole
like pancakes, eggs, bacon, really fucking quickly. And then the
guy at the bar was like, wow, you ate that
really fast. And he was like a really hot, like

(12:36):
six four, very muscular gay guy, and I was like,
I just got destroyed by this. I just looked down
at my feet.

Speaker 2 (12:44):
I didn't something like that happened to you recently too,
where you were like we were talking about something like
in someone like like confronted you like in that way,
and it was like really off putting for you. But
like you just give that energy off.

Speaker 3 (13:03):
Like that kind of off people sometimes I do.

Speaker 2 (13:05):
People like see me and talk to me like that's like,
which I'm actually really happy about. Like I think I
just have very kind eyes. Like not to brag or anything,
but like people just come up and talk to me
like like not even like in like a hitting. It's
not even like they're hitting on me. It's literally just
like people come up and talk to me or ask

(13:26):
me for directions, and I'm like, bitch, I don't know
this fucking city. Like like that type of conversation, which
I love.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
I love You're also good at carrying mundane conversation. It's
like a Southern thing.

Speaker 2 (13:38):
I think, Like I've been so bad about it recently,
Like I've been so in my head when I talk
to people. It's so bad. Yeah, sorry, you got bodied, Kai.

Speaker 3 (13:47):
No, It's totally fine. I needed that. Also, do you
remember when I smoked weed in Miami?

Speaker 2 (13:51):
Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. I
will literally I will literally never smoke weed with Kai
ever wait what you do.

Speaker 3 (14:02):
I genuinely never smoke weed. I think I've probably smoked weed.
I've taken like one hit and this is this is
the this is the time that I smoked we over
the last four years. And I remember we were in Miami.
Andrew was like, you should just like smoke weed, fuck it,
And I was like, no, I get really weird when
I smoke weed, and I get stressed out and I

(14:22):
basically have all of the parts of me that I
hate are like turned up times ten when I smoke.
That's how I feel. And he was like, I love you,
I'm your friend. Like I'll just you know, we'll just
hang out. It'll be fine. I took the smallest hit
from whatever, was it, like a pen or something. Yeah,
and then I just go dead silent and I sit
down on the bed. And then you guys are like
doing stuff, and I'm like, I should say something. I

(14:44):
should say something, so I don't want to weird them out.

Speaker 1 (14:46):
So I was like, it be fair, very valid situation
to go wrong. The hotel room they're talking about is
this hotel and Little Havana, Miami, but it's literally it's
just like a really tiny kind of like capsule hotel situation,
and they were in a room with like four bunk beds.

Speaker 2 (15:07):
No, two bunk beds for people.

Speaker 1 (15:09):
Two bunk beds for people. It was just like smell.

Speaker 2 (15:14):
It was terrible.

Speaker 1 (15:15):
You're to hear to hear, and then everything else was either.

Speaker 2 (15:18):
Bed wall or desk.

Speaker 3 (15:21):
It was just four guys.

Speaker 2 (15:23):
And they were so fucking messy. Oh got it drove
me absolutely, But it.

Speaker 1 (15:28):
Was it was you, Lucas, Josie.

Speaker 2 (15:31):
No, Josie, Josh I think was in there, Josh Kai. Yeah,
I think it was us.

Speaker 3 (15:37):
For maybe Finn was he not in.

Speaker 2 (15:39):
That room, had his own room, Okay, but it might
have been No.

Speaker 3 (15:45):
Yeah, I think it was just Lucas because a Ryan was.

Speaker 1 (15:48):
There on that trip and I.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
Was not staying with you all. Was Christian there?

Speaker 3 (15:52):
Okay?

Speaker 2 (15:53):
Then yeah, it was just as four.

Speaker 3 (15:55):
So after a while being silent, boys, oh, I should
say something to be social and inject myself into the conversation.
So I was just like, what are we doing next?
And Drew was like, oh, I don't know. I think
we're gonna go to this place. I'm like, okay, well,
like what time are we doing that? And then like
should we get ready now? Like is that in fifteen minutes,
I just start going through the itinerary of just being

(16:17):
like very anxious.

Speaker 1 (16:18):
Started becoming like OCD adjacent because I'm just like controlling
every next time.

Speaker 3 (16:24):
Exactly in my head. Yeah, exactly. It was like grasp
me for some level of control reality. Yeah, And like
I think I was trying to be like, oh, how
can I contribute to the situation.

Speaker 2 (16:36):
That's like literally why I don't smoke weed? Yeah, it's
literally I.

Speaker 3 (16:39):
Overthought at so many levels and then you Drew literally
was like kai, you should never smoke weed ever for
like twenty minutes.

Speaker 2 (16:48):
Also, like the thing is like it was like the
most persistent like like stream of consciousness like questions I've
ever had in my life. Like it was like literally
like five hundred questions and five minutes like like it was.
It was wild. I've never experienced anything like it in my.

Speaker 3 (17:10):
Life because my tolerance is also zero. Yeah, I have
a baby, I don't think so.

Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yeah, I think I was.

Speaker 3 (17:19):
That's like when you weren't really drinking or smoking.

Speaker 1 (17:22):
Yeah, I think on your birthday you didn't even really
drink because I remember at dinner, the whole dinner fiasco,
and you weren't drinking.

Speaker 2 (17:29):
Oh yeah, wait, like when I had the allergic reaction.

Speaker 1 (17:34):
No no, no no, but yeah, you weren't drinking at
that time. I'm thinking of your birthday dinner because that
was the same trip, because remember we did like a
birthday dinner thing. I think it like Mandolin, Oh, I
love Miami, Miami is we should go back to Miami
and I'll smoke you out.

Speaker 3 (17:51):
That sounds great. I would love that.

Speaker 1 (17:52):
We'll do.

Speaker 2 (17:53):
Like. Also, the episode we recorded out there is really
cute and wholesome. Oh yeah in the car yeah, and
that was like, is that the first time you were
on camera when we like know, the first time he.

Speaker 1 (18:03):
Was on camera was in the Flea episode.

Speaker 2 (18:05):
The episode yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

Speaker 1 (18:08):
Because we had no choice.

Speaker 2 (18:09):
Everyone was like, who the fuck is that that in
the back?

Speaker 3 (18:13):
Could I remember the Miami episode because O Ryan put
her head on my shoulder and that was the first
time that a woman had touched me in eight and
a half years, and I just blacked out. Anyway, this
is cool.

Speaker 2 (18:31):
Blacked out on video and I watch it, he watches it.

Speaker 1 (18:34):
Right, saved tabs. Whoever has a clip of that on
their TikTok y'all need to go through to see who
saved it and see if Kai's in there. Oh my god.
Actually I saw there's a re upload account that's like
re uploading ship that you've posted, and this made me
laugh so fucking hard.

Speaker 2 (18:51):
Fuck.

Speaker 1 (18:52):
I hope it's in my legs. I hope. I didn't
unlike it because I realized it was like a reupload account,
and I didn't.

Speaker 3 (18:57):
Want to think that that's just me.

Speaker 1 (18:59):
I thought it was you too, because.

Speaker 3 (19:00):
It's just they spelled my name like one letter wrong
or something. Yeah, guys, if you're listening to this, that's
not me. That's an impostor.

Speaker 2 (19:07):
And in Bosters among Us among Us.

Speaker 3 (19:10):
A bunch of comments were like, you've already posted these.
You're reheating your own nachos. I was like, dude, this isn't.

Speaker 2 (19:17):
Me reheating your own najas.

Speaker 1 (19:21):
You think you're funny, but.

Speaker 3 (19:23):
You thought of TikTok that I made. It's funny. You
should pull that up.

Speaker 1 (19:25):
Oh I can't find it. It's you literally playing with
your food.

Speaker 2 (19:29):
Oh it's the chicken wings one. Yeah, I love that.
How much meat is left on the bone.

Speaker 3 (19:40):
I forgot about this one that's like when I first
downloaded cap cut.

Speaker 1 (19:45):
Yeah, I love cap cut. I love cap cut.

Speaker 2 (19:48):
I was literally just talking about that yesterday, like how
much you love cap or when I was at the gym,
like how much you love cap cut it you might
be giving someone a titorial me. Yeah, I'm not that good. No,
you're good.

Speaker 1 (20:01):
I'm good when I'm like the kind of high that
I'm watching something like my field there. Yeah, my best
cap cuts happened if I'm watching a show, because I
think that's when like the stand in me comes out,
like yeah, and I like my last ones are like
I made, like, ah, I wonder if I have it.
I have Carrie from Sex in the City where when

(20:22):
she wore that stupid fucking hat, I have a good
cap cut.

Speaker 3 (20:25):
Which one I feel like she wears a lot of well.

Speaker 1 (20:27):
When she wore the stupid hat and was like in
Dore with the thing in her mouth.

Speaker 3 (20:31):
Oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (20:32):
Also, speaking of the stand in me, like I went.

Speaker 4 (20:37):
To a family cup in your ass, I went to
a comedy show for this comedian that like I didn't
realize like how obsessed I was with him.

Speaker 2 (20:54):
Has that ever happened to you? Like, I literally like
went to the show and I was like, oh, like
this is like a peer, like this is a friend,
Like I'm gonna buy tickets to support one he puts
on like one of my favorite comedy sets I've seen
in a very long time. Like it was so tight,
it was so funny, Like I was like crying laughing
the whole time. But then like we hung out after

(21:16):
and he would like tell me stories like that happened
to him, and I was like, I know this from
a TikTok he posted four years ago and never I
didn't want to say that because like that's so fucking creepy,
but like legitimately, like I was interviewing him because like
I I am like a fan of his, and it
was like freaking me out kind of.

Speaker 1 (21:34):
I mean, no, you watched me do that with the
girl your mom? Uh, your mom Ashley.

Speaker 2 (21:40):
Oh yeah, the shoes and shit. Uh.

Speaker 1 (21:44):
We were leaving the Vogue eBay Vintage Market with Colin
and we ran into her and I spoke to her
and her sisters.

Speaker 2 (21:52):
She had the shoes or you had the shoes.

Speaker 1 (21:54):
Someone had shoes. I don't I don't really remember, but
I literally spoke to her as if like she was
a longtime friend, but really all that meant was my
dumb ass was like spewing things about her to her,
and then we walked away and I was like, no, I.

Speaker 2 (22:09):
Literally I literally did that. I wasn't spewing it, but
I was like, oh, like I like it was like
you about.

Speaker 1 (22:16):
To act like you didn't know what he was saying,
Like oh.

Speaker 2 (22:19):
The first thing I fucking told him after his show
was like, no, like I'm like a huge fan, Like
you don't understand, Like I'm a really big fan of yours,
Like I watched this weird, obscure interview you did on
another podcast that like no one is talking about, Like
I'm like, I'm obsessed with you. And then the friend
I was with was like you literally told him like

(22:42):
you were a fan, and I was like, God, I
don't give a fuck. Yeah, if I'm a fan of someone,
I'm gonna let them know like what that is.

Speaker 1 (22:48):
I will literally always tell someone that, Like I won't.
That won't be the first thing, but the second somebody
who I admire and I'm around them and their shit
comes up, I I'm not about to act Oblivias. I'm
my girl, You're the goat, Like what like you have
to say something nice also like don't be a fucking

(23:09):
nerd bitch. Come on, that's about to tell him.

Speaker 2 (23:12):
That you're a fan.

Speaker 1 (23:13):
And now when he does the fuck a fan challenge, boom.

Speaker 3 (23:17):
Yeah, you're probably on the top of the list.

Speaker 2 (23:20):
The top of the list.

Speaker 1 (23:22):
Unless he has a boyfriend or something.

Speaker 3 (23:23):
I'm sorry, guys, I uh I got caught.

Speaker 1 (23:26):
Again doing what like sankeybox?

Speaker 2 (23:31):
Oh my god? Yes, yes, I hate the whole role
in like under one minute. Let me see your son?
Can I see your chop?

Speaker 3 (23:46):
Oh my god? So I don't know that people are
recording this ship when I do it.

Speaker 2 (23:53):
Yeah, I don't know that.

Speaker 1 (23:56):
Yes, why don't you just like go on.

Speaker 3 (23:58):
Like fifteen and a month probably on average, it's not
like one video is fifteen grand.

Speaker 2 (24:03):
It's just four videos.

Speaker 3 (24:05):
There's a lot of videos.

Speaker 2 (24:06):
Four it's four.

Speaker 3 (24:08):
Sure, let's say that there's four.

Speaker 2 (24:10):
Wait the first one you were asking to see her
dirty sock.

Speaker 3 (24:14):
Right, I think that's what it was.

Speaker 2 (24:15):
Yeah, and like she held it up and you mounted.

Speaker 3 (24:18):
What did he say?

Speaker 2 (24:19):
I forget?

Speaker 3 (24:19):
Or what did I say?

Speaker 2 (24:20):
He was like, Gorge, can I see your sock? And
he like show He's like, oh, like my god, I'm
like I don't king shame. I'm like, get both of y'all,
get yours. Yeah, as long as he's not being fucking
creepy in the streets, like I don't give a fuck. Yeah,
he's going to enjoy that chop stick. Yeah, enjoy that

(24:42):
chop stick.

Speaker 1 (24:42):
Yeah. Literally, Like that's the kind of depravity that I'm like,
fuck it, Like, literally, you.

Speaker 2 (24:49):
How do you get to that money?

Speaker 1 (24:51):
Like that?

Speaker 2 (24:51):
Over what happens?

Speaker 3 (24:53):
Dude? I don't know. I think about it all the
time because guys, it's not actually me. Good, that's a
this is an ongoing joke on the pata. It's not me.

Speaker 2 (25:01):
You can't back out of it now, bro.

Speaker 1 (25:03):
Yeah that's like what that's you?

Speaker 3 (25:05):
Okay, So let's just say hypothetically, I didn't have this kink.
I don't understand how people get that. I don't like
the sock thing. Yeah, I don't understand that.

Speaker 2 (25:15):
Like what it's confusing me is that's what I was
just about to say. That's what I was just about
to say. It's like it's three thousand miles away and
he's like moaning at chopsticks and like cinnamon rolls.

Speaker 1 (25:27):
That's what confuses me because I'm like you could quite
literally go on to yelp and go through a few
photos and I'm sure you would see like food so good.

Speaker 2 (25:35):
Here's maybe it's like like the false sense of connection,
like it like is giving a girlfriend vibes for him
because it's like tailored to him.

Speaker 3 (25:44):
I'm not always just like, how much does nurture versus
nature play into this? How much of kinks are just
embedded into your genetic code?

Speaker 2 (25:52):
Because I think I think all the kinks are like
born I don't really, yeah, I think I think they're
literally like something not you're not born with your kings.
I think like something happens in your like adolescents or
like when you're Yeah, it's more of a factory.

Speaker 3 (26:08):
I think so too. I think so too.

Speaker 1 (26:10):
But I'm like, he wasn't allowed to like do laundry
and dishes growing up, so now he's like, I'm sad.

Speaker 2 (26:20):
His mom wouldn't let him do the dishes.

Speaker 1 (26:22):
Yeah, because he's a man and he grew up in
like a really like oh, like the women do the dishes. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (26:28):
My cheese moo, Yes, that's the word that I always
use to describe.

Speaker 1 (26:32):
My cheesemo cheese moo. Yeah. I do think I think
some fun shit happens to you and then you're just
like kind of weird and you have to deal with it.
But like say, Lovey, just don't be fucking crazy. At
least he's like paying bread to literally see garbage. It's
kind of lit, and I bet he's postmating her that food.

Speaker 5 (26:51):
I would put the fact that she didn't even buy,
which is fucking lit, like what she's getting paid to
literally sit in her crib and watch Love Island and
then just FaceTime and show her garbage.

Speaker 3 (27:02):
Some people are so freaky and I'm I feel like
that's a whole DLC to life that I don't have access.

Speaker 2 (27:08):
I was gonna say, like, it also feels like, I
mean they live among us, like they're literally among us,
and like it. They're so good at keeping it DL
well because it's like like the freak is like DL
as fuck, Like I don't know how they do that,
Like that's what's like, that's what.

Speaker 3 (27:27):
I didn't even know that there were other positions besides
mission missionary until recently I had to show them a
whole new world.

Speaker 1 (27:34):
I was gonna say, I feel like it's really because
people either have hobbies that are normal or they make
sex their hobby. And I think a lot of people
make sex their hobby and they don't even realize it's
their hobby. I'm like, if that is, if it is
something that is not a necessity, that is taking up
all of your time, and it is your only source

(27:55):
of pleasure, that is a hobby, and you're not even
good at the hobby. Happy you hoes aren't good at
the hobby. Like practice jack of all trades, master of none, ass.

Speaker 2 (28:06):
Bitch, jack off, masturbate, jack of all trade, jack off
all the trade. Yeah, oh my god, Oh my god,
jack off all the trade, masturbate of none.

Speaker 1 (28:20):
Of masturbate never no, no, no.

Speaker 2 (28:23):
Jack off all trade, masturbait of none, nuns, and.

Speaker 1 (28:32):
Masturbate to none, Like you're jacking them all off, but
you're not masturbating to any of them.

Speaker 2 (28:36):
Yeah, I guess that works. I feel like there's a
better there's something, there's something there for masturbate to know.

Speaker 1 (28:42):
Card made up affair. We were talking about how like
when you meet straight people, like a lot of straight
people who only know other straight people, and so Card
was specifically saying this, like he has to like indoctrinate
them into interesting things like because he's like straight people
are awesome, but it's just it's like hard because also
what we're talking about being the interesting thing is like

(29:04):
how are they going to know that sokrda saying please
be calm because of like a video. You just breathed
like that.

Speaker 3 (29:12):
What like what I think you might be a mouth breather?

Speaker 1 (29:17):
Funny because I I think I am a mouth breather.
I am No, you're not have your mouth?

Speaker 2 (29:25):
Oh my god, what the fuck was that? Kuy?

Speaker 1 (29:29):
It's crazy how I start talking for longer than a minute,
you start making noises and then you tell me to
tate my mouth shut.

Speaker 2 (29:36):
That's crazy, cauy, I'm.

Speaker 1 (29:38):
The one who interrupts everyone, right, right, No, I really did.

Speaker 2 (29:42):
Right. I hated the last episode because I spoke the
whole fucking time.

Speaker 1 (29:46):
We go back and forth like that.

Speaker 2 (29:48):
I hate it, though I love it. No, no, no,
when I talk, I mean yeah, I hate my voice.

Speaker 3 (29:54):
I hated the last episode because I was collapsing in
upon myself like a black hole, and I just wasn't
a person. I wasn't a person that episode. I was.

Speaker 1 (30:04):
I'm never a person. I'm not kidding, like I'm not present,
Like oh, I have a really good memory. I have
an amazing memory. A week from now, I will be
able to tell you my week front to back. But
I don't live in the present, like I'm like too panicked.
So yeah, if that makes you feel any better, I'm
not here now.

Speaker 3 (30:23):
I think my closest equivalent of that is if there's
a photo taken of me and I see it. I
have so much dysmorphia for that photo up until around
three months and then I'm like, oh, I recognize that
as me. So I don't know if that's related, but
I feel like it might be. I don't know.

Speaker 1 (30:40):
Yeah, I feel like I've never seen I feel like
every photo I've seen to myself, I feel like I
look like a different person and it freaks me out.

Speaker 2 (30:48):
It is freaky. Oh, but the same thing happens to me.

Speaker 1 (30:52):
But you're just bad.

Speaker 3 (30:54):
You are bad.

Speaker 2 (30:56):
No, I'm not.

Speaker 3 (30:57):
You're sexy, you're hot, your head.

Speaker 1 (31:03):
Straight. Men go to Sicard as cucumbers and leave as pickles.
Let that marinate that far.

Speaker 2 (31:10):
That's really good kind of go to Sicard.

Speaker 1 (31:13):
I wish we had Raven glasses on in the moment
we came up with that, because it was very like Wow,
it was amazing, Like it went like it genuinely went
like back and forth.

Speaker 2 (31:23):
Like when you told me that at the pool, I
was literally like that might be the most genius thing
I've ever heard.

Speaker 1 (31:29):
I mean, granted, your state at the pool was also
the same state of mind that out loud loud as
fuck after eating the first airhead went nobody is talking
about the best thing on the fucking plane.

Speaker 2 (31:41):
That is like really a conversation that people aren't having.
That's like really frustrating to me. Is like sour airheads,
like the new sour airheads.

Speaker 1 (31:47):
You've been trying to push this, Like I know, I will.

Speaker 2 (31:50):
Push this agenda for it as long as possible until
it catches on. The sour airheads are like so good.

Speaker 1 (31:56):
There's more chemicals in them.

Speaker 2 (31:58):
Yeah, it's a new picture acid. Yeah is so good.
There's three new flavors. It's the ones that in you
threw at us. Oh yeah those are those are this our.

Speaker 3 (32:08):
I'm block to that until you said it. Yeah, I'm sorry,
And now I have a kink where I have to
shove airheads in my head.

Speaker 2 (32:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (32:15):
Citr acid is a really underrated and I.

Speaker 2 (32:19):
Love when it feels like my enamel is melting off
my teeth, Like I can like do this and like
my teeth have like a different grit to them.

Speaker 1 (32:25):
I hate that feeling. That's why I don't drink the
red bull. I like can't finish a coke or something
all at once because that like a string gent feeling
all my teeth. But also I like, question, do y'all
do this? I go to the bathroom every time the
culture question for the culture. Why can Arianna, Nikki Beyonce
and everybody be a slut and I can't? That's essentially

(32:49):
what she was saying, Like no, like.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
Baseline, yeah, snap part fuck.

Speaker 1 (32:56):
What was I saying? Oh, I go in the bathroom
after I eat every time I eat, and it's because
I have to wash my hands. I have to wipe
my mouth. And I was saying this to somebody and
they're like, oh, I'll take like the paper and literally
put my finger around it and like take a napkin

(33:17):
and like rub my feet or my fear.

Speaker 2 (33:21):
Yeah, what the heck you mean your teeth? Your freaking feet, bro,
your feet are not in your Sorry.

Speaker 1 (33:26):
I looked at Kai. Then I got scared and I
had to remember if I had socks, and shoes on
because he's like close looking.

Speaker 3 (33:33):
I took one photo one time.

Speaker 2 (33:35):
Run the clip.

Speaker 1 (33:39):
I wipe my teeth. Do you ever do that? Or no?
Have you ever done that? Why not?

Speaker 2 (33:45):
Because I'm not a fucking weirdo.

Speaker 1 (33:47):
That's I feel like that's hygienic.

Speaker 2 (33:49):
No, it's it's hygienic, but it's like hygenic to like
a degree that I just can't stand behind, Like I'm
fundamentally like an unhygienic person. Like I don't believe, Yeah,
you're you're clean.

Speaker 1 (34:00):
I know, I'm joking, like I was gonna say, you're
like hygienic, but.

Speaker 2 (34:06):
I'm I'm normal. I'm like literally just a normal.

Speaker 1 (34:10):
Well you don't wash your hands after you pee a lot?

Speaker 2 (34:13):
That I literally I will stand on this till the
day I die. If I had dirty dick, dirty used dick,
I would wash my hands, But my dick and balls
are spotless and clean.

Speaker 1 (34:25):
That's like that.

Speaker 2 (34:25):
And I don't touch urine. I literally don't touch.

Speaker 1 (34:27):
Urine when you touch the handle.

Speaker 2 (34:29):
Like I flush with my foot. I'm not even kidding.
I flush with my foot. Not here obviously, but when
I'm out.

Speaker 1 (34:36):
In public, Like I just really can't like, you can't sit.

Speaker 2 (34:38):
Here and find selfish to flush with my foot because
other people touch that handle.

Speaker 1 (34:42):
I've thought about it, but in public, I'm like, why
would you be putting your hands.

Speaker 3 (34:45):
There's some bathrooms that you walk into and you're like,
I'm supposed to flush.

Speaker 2 (34:49):
Yeah, Like it feels illegal to like my ears are ringing,
someone's talking about me.

Speaker 1 (34:53):
If that's not the vibe, I'll usually just take paper
towel and like, yeah, cover my hands.

Speaker 3 (34:59):
Well, speaking of the bathroom, this is what week three
of me having my bidet, and it's amazing. It feels
really good to sit on that.

Speaker 1 (35:07):
Thing like shot at your butt and it hurts.

Speaker 2 (35:09):
No, it like it gives you like fissures on your asshole,
Like it literally cuts your like buttthole over.

Speaker 1 (35:14):
It likes it because it gives him a real reason
to scratch, to scratch his ass in public.

Speaker 3 (35:20):
Now. I like the pressure because it cleans it thoroughly,
and I fuck with that.

Speaker 1 (35:26):
I actually think that's amazing that you're hygienic in that way.

Speaker 3 (35:28):
Yeah, it's And I've also started to use it even
when I don't have to ship. I'll just sit on
there when i'm feeling bad.

Speaker 1 (35:36):
Yeah, that's you're just like when you're in a sad mood,
you just spray your ass with water.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
It's like I actually I was going to say, like
thirty percent of this is real, Like it's not. When
you're sad, you just like sit on it.

Speaker 3 (35:53):
And I have caught myself procrastinating on work that I
have to do by like being like getting my probably dirty.

Speaker 1 (36:01):
I really can't get on you because what's the what's
the process?

Speaker 2 (36:05):
I would what's the process after using a day? Because
that's what Like I funk with a bidet. I love
a biday, but like my soggy bottom, like with paper
to toilet.

Speaker 3 (36:17):
Paper to just wipe your butt, just.

Speaker 2 (36:20):
Like half to take them. It's one plied toilet paper
and my fingers break through and I start fingering my
asshole because like.

Speaker 1 (36:26):
Well, that's why you have to wash your fucking hands.
You should be washing your hands.

Speaker 2 (36:30):
I don't want to be touching my asshole when I'm
in the bathroom.

Speaker 1 (36:33):
You should probably wash your hands before. Like a lot
of times if I'm out in public, I will wash
my hands before I use the bathroom.

Speaker 2 (36:40):
Wait, and yeah, I think you're completely missing the point.
Like I actually enjoy as in a public toilet. Bitch.
I was at I was out and about. I was
doing my thing. Okay, I was with my buddies and
we were all just like talking in a circle and
we're just kiki. It's actually it's actually it's actually the

(37:04):
guy that it was like our guy said that you're
by a. I was like talking to him and I
was talking to my other friend and we're just like
laughing boots whatever, and then.

Speaker 3 (37:22):
Laughing boots whatever, laughing boots. Also the way holding the mic,
I know, it was really.

Speaker 1 (37:33):
Like, it's good, it's erganomic. But I've never seen anybody
hold it like that.

Speaker 3 (37:39):
Homophobic.

Speaker 1 (37:40):
Yeah, well no, when your foot was up, it actually
made sense because it was like this balancing act. Now
it just looks stupid. Now I am going to be
homophobic stupid.

Speaker 2 (37:53):
But I we were just like talking in this dude
that's like like tweaking off something like literally like spazzing
out here.

Speaker 1 (38:03):
This guy came up for another drink.

Speaker 2 (38:07):
Yeah, tweaking of something. He walks up and he's like,
does anybody have like does anybody have any like blow?
And we're all like no, and he's like, can I
have a lighter? Like can I have a cigarette And
we're like no, and he's like, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay,
you're handsome, you're beautiful. Then he points to me, I'm

(38:29):
not kidding, and he says, you're and then just walks away.
I'm not kidding. I didn't say a fucking word to
this man. But he goes, you're handsome, You're beautiful. Your gowns,
ball gowns, beautiful, beauty, beautiful, beautiful gowns. Gown.

Speaker 1 (38:47):
Wait, so did you know him?

Speaker 2 (38:49):
No, no, idea, none of my friends knew him either.
He just like pulled up and just like sneak dissed me.

Speaker 1 (38:54):
And honestly, you should have in that like moment seeing
if you could get a whole old of laced coke
and then give it to him any o DS and
then he will literally learn to never do that.

Speaker 2 (39:06):
That's that is good.

Speaker 3 (39:07):
I have.

Speaker 2 (39:08):
I have been putting fintanyl in coke recently, and to
teach people lessons.

Speaker 3 (39:13):
That's really smart.

Speaker 2 (39:15):
Yeah, I feel like it's I feel like it's gonna
like clean trend. I think yeah, I think people like
are gonna stop doing coke soon.

Speaker 1 (39:23):
Oh my god, brou I think like I thought people
did stop for a while. Yeah, it did for like
five years, but it's a procession sign. I feel like
it's literally you know. You know how in two thousand
and eight, all the music was.

Speaker 2 (39:34):
Like we're gonna go crazy, We're gonna drink in the club.
We're gonna drink in the club, like we're gonna.

Speaker 3 (39:42):
Did see a statistic that was like people are gen
Z's drinking more now than they were?

Speaker 2 (39:48):
And then like literally like four years ago, it was
like gen Z had like the lowest drinking.

Speaker 1 (39:54):
I mean to be fair, like is it most of
gen Z now above the legal drinking?

Speaker 2 (40:00):
So like, finally, what does that mean?

Speaker 3 (40:05):
What do you say?

Speaker 1 (40:06):
Like are you happy people get to drink or like
you hoping to like see like twenty one year old drinking?

Speaker 2 (40:12):
I love one year old. Don't make me drink a lot.
That's like literally my vibe.

Speaker 1 (40:18):
No, that's me. But it's smoking and nobody smokes with me.
And everybody gets mad that I talk about smoking so often.
Sorry that you're so used to doing it that you
don't have to like tell anybody about it, But like
it's still not normal that I.

Speaker 2 (40:30):
Do that all the time. I literally was never like
like I cried laughing when that guy just looked at
me with silence after complimenting everybody I was with, like
and it then, Oh that I fucking forgot about this then,
Like me and my friend was we were talking about
it like after and like we were just like I
was like, do you know that guy? And he was like, no,

(40:50):
I don't know who that is, Like none of us
know him. And I was like, whoa. He's like he's
on one and we like turn around and he's like
doing like like crazy shit in this circle behind us.
But we didn't realize that how close he was. And
like we're just talking about it, and I like retell
that story and I'm like, yeah, he like literally just
called me ugly and nasty and disgusting without saying a

(41:10):
fucking word. It was hilarious. Well, five minutes later he
comes back by and he's kind of like mellowed out
and level, and he was like, hey, I just wanted
to say you're like really cute, by the way, and
like you're handsome and you're beautiful, but like you're really cute,
and so he made up for it, like he made
up for it later and like he was just so
scared that, like he like actually hurt my feelings. But

(41:31):
I was like, no, like it's really hard to hurt
my feelings because I will just monetize it on my podcast.

Speaker 3 (41:37):
Yeah, you see a paycheck every time I get.

Speaker 1 (41:40):
You see trauma, I see chit ching ching ching.

Speaker 3 (41:43):
Hold on, no, don't.

Speaker 1 (41:48):
Okay, I almost just kissed you.

Speaker 2 (41:50):
I know I almost kissed you too. But we have
to say I've gotten really good at physical touch.

Speaker 1 (41:54):
Right, yeah, he has, he has. I what did I say? Oh?
He his physical touch you to feel like if a
doll came to life, Like if a doll just learned
it and they didn't have joints yet.

Speaker 2 (42:08):
So these movements like I knew, like the I knew that,
like you wanted that and like required that for like healing,
because you would do it to me like when I
was down bad. So I was just like, oh, this
is something like she would want done to her. So
like when I was like rubbing your glitterius when you
were sad, like it was awkward for me.

Speaker 1 (42:30):
No, but like a really good job for your first time.

Speaker 2 (42:32):
That was like my eight hundred billionth time. Let's get it.
I mean it.

Speaker 1 (42:36):
We said we would restart because it hadn't worked time before.

Speaker 2 (42:41):
No, But like when I would like touch you, I
was I just didn't know how to do it, and
I like we would be like this far apart on
my bed and I would just be.

Speaker 1 (42:48):
Like, ironically you would do that, like I'd be like
sitting and that's so sad to be fair, when I
started giving you guys physical effects, and at first, I,
if anything, I felt like a perverb because like our
group wasn't physically affectionate at all for the most part,

(43:10):
like kind of but like we weren't. Like we've definitely
as we've all grown older, we'd become more like likely
to like hold each other and like grab each other
for a hug. But like when I would first start
doing it, I remember like when of y'all would be
sitting crying and I would like always like go up
and like just like grab one of them, and then
like while they're talking, and I always do that, like

(43:30):
I always grab people like that, and then it does
cross my mind that like.

Speaker 2 (43:36):
Wait, also, it was like in the car, like you
moaned when I touched you yesterday when we were.

Speaker 1 (43:41):
Driving, because you've gotten so good at it.

Speaker 2 (43:43):
Yeah, like I'm not even kid, I'm not even.

Speaker 1 (43:45):
Kidding so low that now it's like.

Speaker 2 (43:47):
I literally did this move. I was just like pat, Pat, Pat,
and it was like and it was like, oh wait,
like that was so good.

Speaker 1 (43:57):
No, it wasn't that. It was you, I have really
bad pain right here, and you like grabbed my back
or something. He like rubbed you rubbed a finger into
my back and it felt really good and I did
let out of it.

Speaker 3 (44:08):
And I do remember that you have on better at
physical touch because after he'll actually cuddle with me. Where's
four before you would just get up and immediate.

Speaker 2 (44:20):
I would roll the tarp up. You could roll the
tarfaup bose you down with.

Speaker 3 (44:27):
You would have one. He would be on grinder with
his phone, and then you'd just be spraying indiscriminately in
the corner. And then and then you would get me
a fucking uber pool home.

Speaker 1 (44:39):
Oh my god. I feel like I used to be
in an uber all the time. But that's when we
first moved here, and like we actually had like stamina
to be outside. I want to be outside again. But
like also now it just sucks. The only thing that
is annoying about being somebody who wants to be social
and getting older and by no means are we all whatever?

(45:03):
I have become so picky. I think that's really the
real reason I don't go out as much anymore. Is
I am so picky because I'm like, I am not
gonna fucking torture myself to be in a random ass
bar with bitch. Like what, like I want to go
like dancing somewhere cute.

Speaker 2 (45:21):
I want to dance. I want to dance so bad.
We should all go dancing, like for real, for real,
Josiah needs it bad, like Kai and I were talking about,
like we want to learn how to dance, like unironically,
like I just want to like feel my body and move, like.

Speaker 1 (45:35):
Let's go on Friday I dance. I feel like I'm
the only dancer left.

Speaker 2 (45:39):
Also, like the thing is dan though I loved Wait,
what was I gonna say? Oh, completely derailing the conversation,
Like I don't know why this thought. Oh no, like
dancing high school musical but like we went and visited
the high school music Yeah we did, and we didn't
talk about it. But like in Utah they filmed it
in Salt Lake City at like East High School or

(46:01):
something like that, and then or more it's really really crazy.
It's like actually the school, just the.

Speaker 1 (46:16):
School and people fucking go there. Bro, like we met
we met somebody who went there, like we were.

Speaker 2 (46:23):
At Alta to East.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
I spoke a joint in front of East High. I'm crazy,
I don't go fuck I oh Me and Drew. We
were role playing super Super Super Super Super seniors.

Speaker 2 (46:37):
Yeah, I mean there's a few more supers in there.

Speaker 1 (46:41):
Super super super Super Damn are you Are you gonna
go to your high school reunion?

Speaker 2 (46:47):
Yeah? I was literally like thinking about that like a
couple of days ago because I was like, wait, like
that's very soon soon, But no, I will absolutely not.
I will not be going.

Speaker 1 (46:59):
What I think I gonna go to mine. I feel
like mine is gonna be fun.

Speaker 2 (47:02):
No, yours will be lit as fun.

Speaker 1 (47:04):
It means a card. We're talking about it, and we
were like, wait, we kind of need.

Speaker 2 (47:07):
To like, no, that's gonna be fun because people like
will have fun, like grand Berry, Texas, like everyone has
like kids.

Speaker 1 (47:16):
No, literally literally, yeah, there are people from my class
who have kids and stuff, but they're still fun. People
from Miami. So I guess like Miami is just like different,
But I think it'll be fun also I think means
a card or planning on like doing the first ever,
like you know the Nationals cheer teams. We're gonna do

(47:38):
the first ever just like duo team of it, and
we're still figuring out the songs on the rotation. But
right now it's funck. I have to ask him what
exactly it was? Yes, and by Rihanna, by Arihanna and
then but every transition is gonna be the real transition.

Speaker 2 (48:01):
Who is transitioning?

Speaker 3 (48:03):
No, she was talking about something else. Oh, sorry, continue, No.

Speaker 1 (48:08):
That was kind of it. As I was going, I
was like, actually, this is.

Speaker 3 (48:10):
I'm sorry about my buy friend.

Speaker 1 (48:13):
You're what.

Speaker 3 (48:15):
My bye friend?

Speaker 1 (48:16):
That's what that is.

Speaker 3 (48:20):
I didn't get invited to my reunion?

Speaker 1 (48:24):
Do you have to get invited?

Speaker 3 (48:25):
I don't know because I didn't get it. I didn't
hear about it, but I don't even know if it happened.
And I also don't know if a college.

Speaker 1 (48:33):
I get invited. I can't imagine who from my school
would reach out like yeah, how does that?

Speaker 2 (48:37):
It's always it's literally like one person that like is like,
oh we should do this, and then yeah, they like
message you on me and.

Speaker 1 (48:45):
The carter are going to be the people and do
like a crazy pep rally like I want a concert
like like that would be fun. That would be We're
gonna get a DJ Chipman to perform arm ecstasy. Uh
was it Brian Mode Trick Daddy. It's gonna be a

(49:08):
whole lineup. It's gonna be crazy tricks. We're going to
get JT and Young Miami back together.

Speaker 3 (49:13):
WHOA, that's exciting.

Speaker 2 (49:14):
I would love that.

Speaker 3 (49:16):
The last time I was in my hometown, I drove
by my Bye. Imagine you as my therapist. Gay guys
started as you drove, Let's talk about that part.

Speaker 2 (49:31):
Let's talk about that.

Speaker 3 (49:32):
Pussy yeah, recounting your sexual traumas that has been through.
I drove by my My my middle school, and I
got hit by such a such a potent wave of
nostalgia that I slept the rest of the day at
my parents house. It was really weird. I was like,

(49:54):
this is fucking crazy.

Speaker 2 (49:55):
Do you like nostalgia? Oh? You hate it?

Speaker 3 (49:59):
I don't. I think it's it's like a squarely melancholy feeling,
which I do think part.

Speaker 2 (50:05):
Of I really I don't know if I kind of
love nostalgia because I love being sad but it like
makes me so yeah, its oh god, I wonder what
like the evolutionary advantage of nostalgia's is just like memory,
Like like that's a good question.

Speaker 1 (50:21):
I like kind of. I don't think we need nostalgia
as much as like it's being used.

Speaker 3 (50:28):
Now, Like I don't weaponize.

Speaker 1 (50:30):
It's literally a problem. But I've also never been because
I'm not somebody who I wish I was better, because
I do have friends who are really good at documenting everything,
and they're like super obsessed with nostalgia. Sorry, Drue is
topping Chai off.

Speaker 3 (50:49):
And it actually feels pretty good this time. Okay, Oh
well that one was on my prostate, and you know
I like that.

Speaker 2 (51:04):
Bring up prostates right now? You know you can't bring
up prostates right now, y'all.

Speaker 3 (51:10):
Do not bring up prostates.

Speaker 1 (51:11):
I need something to go back and track all the
times during a mental health crisis. Drew Phillips has publicly
talked about a disease that he has, but he doesn't have.

Speaker 2 (51:23):
Guys, my drat bladder, my dra My data isn't planing,
my bladder isn't draining properly.

Speaker 3 (51:30):
Wait, what do you mean?

Speaker 2 (51:31):
I can't I can't finish peeing when I go pee.
And this happened to me in like January, and then
it just went away and I didn't think anything of it,
didn't go to the doctor, and then this happened, and
I was like, Oh, I need to get this shit
looked at. So my oh my fucking god, my doctor
was so creepy, y'all. I, oh my god, my doctor

(51:52):
was a fucking weirdo freak bitch. And I like kind
of was obsessed with it.

Speaker 1 (51:55):
I know you are, because he's gone back three times.

Speaker 2 (51:58):
Yeah, well, no, they keep schedule appointments because they think
I have cancer Hodgkins lymphoma as he said, which also
I'm like, that's what I was saying, Like a doctor
should not even even if there's like an inkling inside
of them, they should not say that to a patient. Ever,
he was like he did like a lymph node screening,
and he like ran through all my things and he

(52:20):
was like, could be Hodgkins lymphoma, Like let's get you
in tomorrow. And I was like, oh my god, what,
oh my god. But I like, like, I know this
is like probably illegal, Like I don't know, like, but
like he was really fucking weird from the jump, like
really weird. Like he like looked at me, and within
like five minutes he was like kind of sneaked tossing
me and he was like listen, like like in my office,

(52:42):
like we treat like all types of kids around your
age and like like like people that live on our bridge.
And he like held his hand out and pointed at
me like no, literally he was like insinuating that, like
I was like a home almost kid, and I looked
at my outfit and I was like, girl, what the fuck?

(53:03):
Like I was wearing like a nice ass outfit, and
like he was like he was like you can really
trust me because we treat like all types of people
like you. And I was like, what the fuck is happened?
Like literally what is happening? And like there was a
very clear switch, like you know when a doctor asks you,
are you like suctually active? Yes? Man or woman? Man,
there's like always there, there's like this brief hesitation. Literally

(53:24):
his was like oh cool, and like he moved on,
but then he started getting fucking weird and creepy, like
he was not probably.

Speaker 1 (53:31):
H'm telling you you could possibly have like essentially terminal
cancer like.

Speaker 2 (53:34):
With this no, he was like a could be hodgkinsling Filma,
but like that's like the best cancer to get because
like there's like a ninety ninety percent like success right now.
I was like like in that moment when I was
watching this man, like you know how actors every once
in a while they're like I met this person, and
I like the entire role was like fulfilled, Like I
knew how I was gonna act based off this person,

(53:56):
Like this person is my muse. Like I was like,
if I was an actor, this would have been a
fucking gold mine. He was so bizarre, but like like
I like I don't know how to describe it.

Speaker 1 (54:07):
Like he kept trying to doctor curse.

Speaker 2 (54:10):
But he kept trying to like prove himself to me,
like prove his like coolness and prove his like intelligence,
and like he would be like I'm not gonna speak
doctor speak to you, like I'm gonna like I'm gonna
like lay it how you want. And then he'd like
go on this like really long, weird winded like hyper
medical terminology like just like the just something I literally
would never understand, Like even if I went to fucking

(54:33):
college for like five years and I'd be like what
and he was like, oh, sorry, sorry, but he kept
trying to like prove how smart. I literally.

Speaker 3 (54:42):
Sounds like like two children in a trend whip.

Speaker 2 (54:45):
No, it literally was giving that, and I think what happened.
I was like started psychoanalyzing him. And I was like, one, like,
we're in this giant medical building and he's on the
fourth floor and it's all doctors above him, and they
all perform surgeries and shit. And he made it very
clear to me that he did didn't do surgery. So
I think he's like a little insecure about his place
in like the medical space. And like he went on

(55:07):
this like also long winded tangent about like the medical
equipment he uses and how like in this building, like
we have the best equipment like all the other doctors
doctors that come to me for like medical testing. And
I was like, dude, whoa, this is like this was crazy,
but yeah, the the fuck? Oh he literally on my computer.

Speaker 1 (55:29):
He literally is just the underdog. He's you got trapped
in a room with like the Anthony Fantano of music critiques.
It's like everyone comes to me and nobody gives a fuck. Apparently.

Speaker 2 (55:41):
No, that's literally like it was.

Speaker 3 (55:42):
It was like the Anthony Fantano of doctors.

Speaker 1 (55:46):
Yeah, like he's like, oh, I I'm no like established critic,
but it's funny how everyone wants to know my score,
Like that's not guid inlab. I don't think Anthony Fantano
has ever talked like that, but if I was him,
that's how I would talk. So I'm kind of projecting
onto that person. Yeah, and I've actually never seen a
full video posode.

Speaker 3 (56:04):
I was thinking about Anthony Fantano the other day because
I saw he gave an album a bad review, and
I was like, this is kind of a scary job
to have to honestly give music and so entire subcultures
and like insane fans bad reviews and objectively give it
a number and be like this is a bad thing.

(56:26):
And I'm like, that would be really scary to have
that job.

Speaker 1 (56:30):
I think, I don't know, I would be much more
inclined to talk about things I liked than the things
I don't like, because I'd be terrified pretty consistently.

Speaker 3 (56:38):
Like, I don't know if I agree with a lot
of his takes, but I feel like he does have
his own integrity, which.

Speaker 1 (56:44):
Which is cool, which is really what like I think
a critiques job when it's something that subjective is is
like take your information and like make sure like that's
your opinion.

Speaker 3 (56:55):
Yeah, but I'm like, at any one point, this guy
probably has like half a million people that have lost
their minds, that like.

Speaker 1 (57:01):
Want to kill And at any one point, the worst
man you've ever liked and had a crush on was
a watch every fucking revas.

Speaker 2 (57:11):
Entire music personality off of Anthony Fantana's like top five albums.

Speaker 1 (57:18):
We aren't becoming more gay people are realizing they have
been gay, and.

Speaker 2 (57:24):
That is a sign of a recession.

Speaker 1 (57:27):
No, that's a sign of a gay man. Is why
are you obsessed with another man's playlist essentially.

Speaker 2 (57:33):
With the amount of gay people is a recession indicator?

Speaker 3 (57:36):
Really? Does that spike before housing crisis? Yes, guys were
at an hour, So.

Speaker 1 (57:43):
Whoa, I have to cut everything I just had for
the last.

Speaker 3 (57:46):
Thirty minutes for the last thirty minutes. Yes, you're saying
so much funny, So no, I'm kidding. Okay, good? I
hate that. No, no, no, no, don't do that. I
don't like that.

Speaker 1 (57:57):
Oh wait, I think I found my Carrie edit. I
did this one sucks. I think this is one of
my first audits.

Speaker 2 (58:07):
I mean, enough many and my big hat, Like, was
that like supposed to be chic or was it supposed
to be silly?

Speaker 1 (58:16):
I think it was supposed to be like sexy and
silly question mark, but like, I don't really know, because
something about the fashion world is they actually don't fucking
play around about weird hats and like specifically like a
top hat, like a very structured like I don't know
why that's there's so many more hats. I don't know why.

Speaker 3 (58:34):
That's the It was really sad about the New Sex
and the City is I personally am like I don't
think that the outfits and wardrobe is great in the
New Sex and the City, but it's so good and
like so much of the original show, and I was like,
it's really sad to see some of the fits that
they're pulling.

Speaker 1 (58:54):
I never finished Sex in the City past season five
because I can't lie. I was like enough enough enough. Yeah,
I was just like fucking get over it.

Speaker 2 (59:02):
Oh my god, wow.

Speaker 1 (59:06):
Which is I'm sure I missed a lot, but I've
seen like two of the movies.

Speaker 3 (59:10):
The movies aren't even cannon in my opinion, but they're funny.

Speaker 1 (59:15):
They are really funny, and that's kind of all that matters,
if you ask me. I'm trying to see if I
have any more like cap cuts than I want to
like show and tell, because oh wait, I posted my
Nathan one.

Speaker 2 (59:31):
That's fine shit, that's literally fine shit giggling and kicking
my fing literally giggling. Imagine him making you laugh like
when y'all are just in.

Speaker 1 (59:42):
I don't think he could actually make me laugh that hard.
If I'm being so honest, I think he would actually
make me incredibly uncomfortable.

Speaker 2 (59:47):
Actually, I agree, I think he would scare the fuck
out of me.

Speaker 1 (59:50):
I don't think. I don't think that's someone I actually
want to be around. Most of my like crushes and
people I find attractive are people I want absolutely nothing
to fucking do with, and I don't believe they should
be like in my life.

Speaker 2 (01:00:05):
Then why am I here?

Speaker 1 (01:00:06):
Because I use you like a sex object. That's different.
I don't have a crush on you, that's true, My fire,
it burns in my my clitteress.

Speaker 3 (01:00:16):
Yeah, Drew's going through because Drew.

Speaker 1 (01:00:17):
Gave me HPV and BB.

Speaker 3 (01:00:21):
That's not cool.

Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
That's dirty, dick.

Speaker 1 (01:00:24):
We can't stop giving each other bb because neither of
us wants to stop hooking up and neither of us
wants to stay on antibiotic.

Speaker 3 (01:00:30):
They call me Kai Big Perfect Penis new Man.

Speaker 2 (01:00:36):
Yeah, we gotta we gotta go, Yeah, we gotta go.
We're losing it right right.

Speaker 1 (01:00:42):
My media of the week, We're not friends.

Speaker 3 (01:00:47):
That was sexy, right.

Speaker 2 (01:00:48):
No, No, we keep trying.

Speaker 1 (01:00:50):
Though, Okay, okay. My media of the week is Shoot
the Mood by Judy suky And and Pale Shelter Tears
for Fears one on one, Hauling Oats every Oh Daylight

(01:01:11):
by Lancy.

Speaker 4 (01:01:13):
And then the Day likely gains it up off phone
because in the day.

Speaker 1 (01:01:18):
And Baby Pink by Kamelokobeo.

Speaker 2 (01:01:21):
My media is music is My Hot Hot Sex thirty
one hundred million by Soldier Boy. Music is My Hot
Hot Sex is CSS Machines Dream by Nobu Katsu Takamori.
And then what song was I listening super earlier that

(01:01:43):
I was like, oh eventually by Tame and Paula.

Speaker 3 (01:01:48):
Oh, that is a good one. That is such a
six so easy to shoot on Tam and Paula. But
some of those songs are.

Speaker 2 (01:01:53):
Really Yeah, it's like he's just like a victim of
like oversaturation and popularity, but like he he's really good.

Speaker 3 (01:02:01):
Did you know that it's just one guy?

Speaker 2 (01:02:02):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:02:04):
I didn't know about Time and Paula until Rihanna did
a cover of their song and then I was hanging
out his song.

Speaker 2 (01:02:10):
It's one guy, same fucking difference.

Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
I don't give a WHOA.

Speaker 2 (01:02:17):
Like AFX Twins is one person.

Speaker 1 (01:02:19):
That's there are two people.

Speaker 2 (01:02:21):
No, bye guys. We signed to iHeart yay, Oh right, I.

Speaker 1 (01:02:26):
Forgot about that. Also, if you haven't noticed, I'm sure
you have. On our cover it has a little iHeart
logo and that's because we signed to iHeart, which is
insane because I grew up listening to the radio. And
the reason I do this is because I wanted to
be on Elvis Durant in the morning show. That was
my dream. My dream was actually to take Elvis's job.

(01:02:47):
But luckily enough, annoying people online liked me, and iHeart
now likes me.

Speaker 2 (01:02:52):
So now expects some major changes. Everything is gonna change,
like this everything gone being change. Yeahah yeah, those are
going to be flipped different.

Speaker 1 (01:03:05):
Yeah, it's gonna be Kai and his sister next week.

Speaker 3 (01:03:09):
Yeah, it's gonna be me and myself ready for that. No,
but we joke around. But there's gonna be a CAKM.
We're just figuring out the what resolution I want it
to be? Imax?

Speaker 2 (01:03:18):
Yeah, he wants it projected on the back wall.

Speaker 1 (01:03:21):
What's it called?

Speaker 2 (01:03:22):
Projector projector mapping?

Speaker 1 (01:03:24):
Projector mapping kai onto like random toys.

Speaker 2 (01:03:27):
Wait, that's actually genius.

Speaker 3 (01:03:29):
But yeah, I guys about KAK. I got the emails
of the production team. I've been emailing them a lot.
I actually got their phone numbers, and I found their
instagrams and I d M.

Speaker 2 (01:03:41):
Yeah, I don't DM the women on the I Heart crew.

Speaker 3 (01:03:43):
No, it was at three am. I don't think that
they saw it.

Speaker 1 (01:03:46):
So what did you say?

Speaker 3 (01:03:48):
Hey, what's up?

Speaker 1 (01:03:49):
Why wouldn't you just say it was for work? Why
would you like?

Speaker 3 (01:03:52):
I want to freak them out.

Speaker 1 (01:03:53):
I think a bad habit I've had since we signed
up iHeart is I keep texting people once the work
day is over, and only when the worked it's over.
So usually I like email everybody back around six PM
and I just blast their emails all night, so their
phone is all the counters like, but it's really useless
questions like oh my god or not even questions. I'm

(01:04:14):
like so excited we're with you guys now, and then
no response because like they responded the first one hundred times.

Speaker 2 (01:04:19):
Yeah, yeah, but we're super excited threading a lot of
value to our show, so we're like, I know, we're
like really, we're we're keen on showing you the future
of emergency dot com because we have some big, big plans,
big things coming. All right, thanks for listening.

Speaker 3 (01:04:38):
By ye three