422: My Big Move with Bill Lawrence

On this week's episode, Turk struggles to digest Carla and JD's betrayal. In the real world, Bill returns to his podcast with all kinds of shenanigans. Buckle up, this is a wild one.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Okay, I gotta tell y'all something real quick. Everything that
I've done up to this point, as far as slimming down,
has been diet and you know, way of life and
everything like that. I haven't really necessarily been working out.
I haven't worked out for a while. While doing the pilot,
I did a little bit of yoga, but not a lot.
I haven't worked out, i'd say in about a month

(00:22):
and a half. Okay, I worked out all last week.
How do I go? When I tell you pain, That's
what I'm talking about. But it's a good pain. No.
This shit is like the type of pain where you're like,
I don't know if I want to work out again.
Pain like I can't straighten my arms, My arms are stuck,

(00:45):
Like do you don't want to go from zero to
one thousand? Brothers? I went from zero to one hundred
like a fricking idiot. And Biden, by the way he
heard himself working out, he's got like I've totally messed
up a shoulder from from pushing too hard. Let me
say right now, is slow. It does not feel good
at all. I thought I was taking it slow. Apparently

(01:09):
I needed to go slower. Did you see the thirsty
pictures I sent you, dude. My wife was like, what what?
What's he trying to say? Is he trying to fuck
you with something? You want to put them on Instagram
because they would be too thirsty? No, I think you
should put them up there. Man, well you got anna,
but I sent him to my girl obviously, but I didn't.

(01:29):
I also want to show off to my friend what's happening.
So I sent him to you and you were like, Okay,
this motherfucker looks like I'm not gonna say the rock,
but Rock Junior pebble a pebble. Yeah, he looks like
like the pebble. Dude, he is ripped. He's ripped. Dude.
Don't skip leg day though. I know, I know, I know,

(01:50):
don't skip them legs. But I hate when people I
show them a good picture and they and they look
for something to criticize. Yeah. I don't have big legs yet,
so that's it. Mind day. I'm just saying, keep the symmetry, man,
because you've got good symmetry right now. No, No, I know,
I agree. I'm the standard guy who always is more
interested in his upper body and then and then you
look uneven and I'm gonna I'm gonna get them like SI.

(02:11):
Don't forget man, because you've always had good symmetry. Keep
it going, thank you. And I'm about to wrap my movies,
so I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna keep going because
I'm really aspired, I'm feeling good. I'm about about being
in shape and my new diet. I'm gonna keep it
going right on. Yeah, I'm not gonna lie to you guys.
I ate cheese. Oh boy, Okay, there's a lot worse

(02:34):
things to eat, but I'm just saying I had some
cheese the other night. The pizza came and I ate
some cheese, and I was like, I eat cheese. I
haven't tasted a good vegan. IU still eat some cheese.
I'm i one. Maybe one day I'll be full badass vegan.
But right now, vegan cheese don't taste good. That's the
I know. Should we invite William in? Is he here? Yes? Oh? So,

(02:56):
everybody exciting news. We have your favorite guest, Bill Lawrence
back on podcast and m everybody loves uncle Bill and
uh and let's bring him in because we always bring
in Bill early because he's the rare guest that gets
the pre theme song attention. Mm hmmm, Ladies and gentlemen,
give it up. And Bill Laura America is where are you? Bill?

(03:27):
And the time we just clapped for you to join
the show? How many shows have you sold that I
like it? Hey, don't you can't let me be Sarah Chalk, man,
I gotta start my recording. Okay, don't be Sarah Chunk.
By the way, Sarah Chalk. Great news. Her show got
a second season high back from season two. And we

(03:48):
love Sarah Chalk and we're so happy about that because
she not only loves the show and loves doing it
and loves all the fan love for it, but she
really wants to live in Canada and just happens to
be a show that shoots in Canada, and so it's
win win for her in Vancouver. Is what I heard?
And groovy I think van groovy. It's what they said.
By the way, I'm also supposed to By the way,
I miss you all so much, Daniel Donald, Bill, this

(04:12):
is the this is the Family Feud Crew right here?
I know? Does it air? Joel? I'm so they sent
it to me and I forgot June thirteenth, Fast and
next time. What happened? Right? No, no, no, no no no
no no, But guys, please mark your calendars right now.
You're on your phone or you're at your computer. June thirteenth,

(04:35):
Family Feud, and this is the dream team right here.
Uh it's yeah, I tune in to see it was
so embarrassing for us. This is a group. I think
people will like that. I think people like seeing that.
I think. And there's some amazing shills, Bill, I'll send you.
They sent me some stills to to approve. And did
you look at them, Donald, or did you look at them? Yeah?
I looked at him. I wasn't care. I don't care,

(04:57):
just post No. They were sending him to see we
approved them. But I can care about it proving though.
I thought they were all amazing. Yeah, I was like,
these are still of us on Family Feud. This is amazing.
I want all I gotta love a lot of love
to pass out too. I'm told to tell Donald Faizon
from Brett Goldstein, who was a writer and plays Roy
on ted Lasso, that a movie called The Wave was

(05:17):
very good. He just watched it. Donald, and Justin Long
and Zach, I thought your episode of Solos was really,
really good as cool. Thank I wonder if any of
these three watched did you guys? Oh shit, I really
meant to god, Bill, dude, I did watch all the time. Bill,

(05:39):
you don't and that second episode. Bill, you don't have
this experience because people love your ship. But I make
something and three of my best friends here don't watch it. Yeah,
but in their defense, in their defense, in their defense,
it is thirty minutes. Yeah, but you you, I think
in rightfully so because I do it to you. You often,
I would say, text or informed me a lot to

(06:01):
remind me that I haven't watched it yet. You probably
don't do that to that I do. He has I
just get we just get tagged. I have people on
my dms that write, Zach, that was amazing. I can't
believe you. I'm crying my eyes out. I can't believe
your friends won't watch it. I'm asking them to watch,
like I'm like a Maudlin documentary series. I was texting

(06:24):
Donald and Joel about it, and Joel's like, I don't
think I can get there on this one. I don't
think I can do it. I'm like, why, Wow, Anyway,
if I'm gonna watch, I'm gonna watch it eventually. It
took you some time. It took you several years to
watch Remember the Titans. I don't believe that you're Donald
right away by and I'll watch anything that Joel does

(06:45):
and Donald right I'm the only person watches everything right
away because I don't believe that it's retaliation for not
watching Titans. I just think you're no, it's not retaliation.
It's just that you understand why I haven't watched it yet.
Ship comes up, things happen, you know. That's how you
guys know this isn't visual thing. But Zach right now
has what my wife calls sad body. Let's switch to

(07:13):
something you guys did watch, and that is Bill. I
just want to say, I'm so happy for you. Um.
I know I've said this before, but I have to
keep saying it because ted Lasso is just everywhere. It's still.
There's this little boy in my movie. He must be
eight years old, and he's so he found out that
I directed an episode and I thought eight would be
too young to love the show, but he put a

(07:33):
believe sign on my trailer. Oh that's awesome. I'm just
gonna wear ted Lasso flag while Zach talks not big deal.
You know, you know what they're saying now, They're saying
that ted Lasso is bigger and better than Scrubs. Now,
this is this is what people are telling you. They're
like those people. I don't like them either. They can

(07:55):
kiss the ted Lasso. We already know he's not gonna
go h eight point five. These are these shows. All
these things don't have to compete. None of this. Yes,
all bills achievements don't have But I'm just saying, no,
you thought. Listen, you hit it big with Spin City,
then you hit it big again with Scrubs, and then
you've gotten even bigger with ted Lasso. Man like this,

(08:16):
It doesn't happen like this for most people. As people,
there's like a hit and then everything after is like, oh,
it was good, but it wasn't no, or it wasn't
there about his new thing that it isn't even announced yet,
I can't I can't talk about it mention here. Its
officials going to get announced, Bill, because I want the

(08:36):
exclusive on this, probably in the next week or two,
and then I'll come on and tell you guys about it.
Be Yeah, well we love you, Bill, and I'm so
proud of you and I guys, I really you're everywhere
and I all these articles. I don't want to jinx you,
but I'm not superstitious. All these articles are like Lasso
is gonna sweep the Emmys. So you know it's weird though,
So he was trying to have his two promotional stuff
for all that. You guys both had to do that

(08:57):
a lot before, and the show is so the end
to this is of that. Like, so it's really hard
because like the whole premise of the show is you
don't care about winning and losing. It's how you play
the game and you know how you treat each other.
So it all feels disingenuous. But um, I promise not
Zach always gives me shit, you guys, if I pretend
not to care, if I'm good at pretending not to care, Yeah,
I promise that Bill. Bill is genius at many things,

(09:19):
but acting is not his best thing. And amazing act
when when he acts, when he acts like he doesn't
give a fuck about awards, it really shows through. Um, now,
what about merch Bill, because everyone including this little boy
want jerseys and stuff like, Yeah, it took me forever,
but uh, it's like the first place I get to
say about Yeah, I think there's there's initial stuff that'll

(09:40):
come out and be available right when the hopefully right
when the trailer comes out, which is a few weeks.
Trailer already come out. The official trailer for season two
comes out in like three weeks, and then and then
all the cool like name kits and like with like
official you know, Premier League type kits come out in September. Well,
they'll be stuff. I'm surprised if club teams all of

(10:02):
a sudden start having jerseys and stuff like that that replicate. Uh,
there's already so much merch on Etsy and I know,
by the way, So that's what happened. I wanted to
make this little boy's day, and I went on and
you have I knew that you guys didn't ever merch yet,
and I went and like, Etsy's just covered with it.
But that's non official. So what I did was I,
even though he's eight, I gave him the sweatshirt that

(10:23):
you had given me because I was like, well, I
love this little boy. He's so sweet and he's like
and uh, and I just wanted to make this day.
I get his name, he should probably send me like
fifty bucks. It's not a big deal that you have
a sad body. I'm joking around. Of course, I'm glad
you gave it to him. That's super cool. I'll put
my shoulders back. I'm sad that I'm sad that Donald,

(10:46):
Joel and Dale didn't watch Solos. But okay, um, so
I'm sorry. No, it's all right, it's all right. You
have other things to do. By the way, I have
a great thematic I have a a great thematic thing
for this episode. I'm gonna talk to you guys about
when you get gone, but I wanted to know how
everybody's lives is going to miss you all. It's been.
It's very good to see you all. Thinking of Donaldistakes.
I golfed for the first time like eight months yesterday

(11:06):
is holy cow. Congratulations on that one with me is
like as a golfer, Bill, you're a teds guy. Bill
does everything the well, you know what Donald, that they
just reopened you know the VA over in Westwood, the
Veterans thing. They have unbelievably beautiful nine whole course that
no one goes to in the veterans area there. It
was really cool. I went there with a. Probably Dotti

(11:28):
plays that all the time with his buddies. It's all
punch and put thing. But it's fun. Yeah, he loves it.
It's beautiful. You know, you've graduated to real courses. You're
the real deal now and I see your videos and stuff.
Now it's fun. It's a lot of fun. If asking
about my life, it's like a roller coaster right now.
Are you allowed to talk about what happened or not? Yeah? Absolutely,
I mean the whole world knows about it. Well, the

(11:49):
craziest thing talk about it? Yeah, sure, why not? So
the day that shows are announced, I get a call
at like ten forty five and it's my agent and
he's like, yo, you're called as soon as you get this.
And I'm like, oh shit, it didn't get picked up.
Like that's the when when not when your whole team
doesn't call you, you know right away it didn't get

(12:10):
picked up. They only want to all be on the
call when it's good news, right, And so I call him.
He's like, so, look, the show didn't get picked up
and it's being reworked. And immediately I was like, oh,
did I get recast? And he was like, no, you
didn't recast. And I was like, all right, great, cool,

(12:30):
great news. So heartless. Well, Bill, you can give him
a pep talk, because this shit happens all the time,
all the time. But it's a very good sign. And
I mean, Bill, I mean you you know better than me.
But isn't it an extraordinary sign that they want to
reinvest another like nine thousand shows have this success story

(12:50):
of getting kind of replatformed and reimagined. They're currently it's
already picked up making How I Met Your Father for
the second time, and this one going right on to streaming,
and they made the first thing happen to Game of Thrones.
There's an original Game of Thrones out there with different
completely different people in it. There's a Scrubs out there

(13:12):
with by the way, with just doing it, they went
on to do good things anyway. That's why we use
their name because they both still had great careers. I
you know, it's it's it's really interesting though, because we
put a lot of work into it and it was

(13:32):
and genuinely thought that you know, the uh, the network
would love it. And at the end of the day,
they loved the characters, and they loved the formula idea,
and they love the cast. They're not changing the cast. Yeah,
but something was missing, they said, and they wanted to
and they want to rework it, which is, well, there's
no better there's no better thing like when they when

(13:54):
you think about it, when they if you go remake
Game of Thrones, you've learned so much from a test
audience and from just your own eyes, go here's what works,
here's what doesn't work. Now we can, I mean you have.
It's such a rare position to be and to go
make something with so much new information, and so I'm
sure they tested your thing and said this doesn't work.
This does work. Obviously they love the cast. Let's keep

(14:15):
the cast, and you're gonna they're gonna go into production
with so much new information. I think it's a blessing
in disguise. Absolutely, remember that it's an imperfect business. Or
what if you thought you guys made the first one
with great care and all that, you don't know that
it wasn't great. It's just so weird because no one
can tell, you know. And I don't mean this to
be vindictive or anything. It's like, but it's out there too.

(14:39):
Like one of the stories of Ted Lasso is Jason
Saidakis and I went to every streaming site and it
wasn't a bidding war. No one bought it except Apple.
I mean, and I'm not doing it now to go
like ha ha, you know, but it's um and people
wanted to like it and they're nice people. And I
know people at different companies and they still was pass pass, pass,
pass pass, And you know, it's just kind of hard

(15:02):
because you're asking people to roll the dice on guessing
how people are going to react to something, and that's
kind of in exact science. You know, there's a reason
why breaking bads on AMC because every other place passed.
It's so you know, it's part of the game. It's
the weirdest part is, by the way, we could all
watch the original Game of Thrones and go this is awesome.
But well, we talked. We talk about that a little

(15:23):
bit on the black Side when it does come out,
but we talk about how you know, Rogue one and
Solo are two not your solos act but Solo and
Rogue one are you know? Does that mean you're gonna
watch it now? But you said my title, yes, do
you think we should use downald our connections to Christ

(15:44):
and phil to get to see all the scenes that
they directed of Solo before they were there's a whole movie.
Apparently they directed a lot. Yeah, I would love it's
probably amazing movie. That's what's funny and snarky, and yeah,
you know those guys, man, it's a different tone and
we're used to in that world. Well your buddies with them,
you probably could get access to say, hey, guys, let's

(16:04):
get super baked and watch. They got mad at me once,
and I think lovingly mad. We had to do a
Qune high panel for something because we all still love
that show and they are so lovely and diplomatic. Because
someone there's a time when everybody was immediately going like
what happened with Solo? How do you feel about so?
And uh? And just because I love them, not because
I was trying to be mean, but I'm like, I

(16:25):
hope the new Solo is awful, and I hope it
absolutely shits the bed, and I hope everybody. I wish
Chris and Phil's version was out, because that's what I think.
And then they were like, dude, you just kept this
thing going in a way around Yeah, think about them,
I mean think about that. I mean what that must

(16:45):
have I mean not that obviously they don't have any
trouble with self esteem, I imagine, but think about what
that must have felt like to them, Like you're directing
the biggest franchise in the world and you get replaced.
That's oh but you know, you know what. But here's
the thing. You know what came after they got replaced
by Solo Spider Verse, one of the dopest superhero movies

(17:06):
in the history of superhero movies. Yea, so good, you
know what I mean? Like your favorite, right, one of
your favorites. That's my favorite spider Man movie. That's one
of my favorite Superman that superhero movies. That and for Ragnaratte.
I hear they're making Are they making a black Superman movie?
There's ears been confirmed. There's there's two black super there

(17:27):
are two black Superman. I think we need to set
start doing your audition tape. His name is Michael B. Jordan. Dude,
come on with it. It's gonna be it's gonna come on.
If it's gonna be anybody that's my favorite com by mom, buddy.
If it's gonna be anybody before me, it's gonna be
Michael B. Jordan. If you come over to my garden.
We can dress you up and do audition videos. I'll

(17:50):
cables to make you fuitionition. Listen to it for fun.
Michael Jordan's tape isn't gonna have him rigged the cables.
I will if we if the three of us, you
know that this week could make people, says, I will
work my butt off writing and funding a super I'll
right and fund of Superman scene. I don't even know
what exists. Back will direct it. We'll use good effects,

(18:13):
and we'll let's just do it one that may not exist.
Now that we have Bill's budget, we can go huge
with it. We can go crazy huge with it. It
remind me, It reminds me of funny Bill story. Right,
So Amanda includes his little boy Elvis Nick and Amanda's
little boy, Elvis is obsessed like many boys where I
believe your son was to be Donald with trash trucks. Yes,
and everyone that we all love this little boys. We're

(18:35):
all buying them trash trucks, and the trash truck toys
keep getting bigger and bigger and bigger. Everyone's trying to
out trash truck. And of course, because I guess this
is a little boy thing. There's a zillion trash truck toys.
And Bill's over and the kid's over and he's playing
with the trash truck and I'm like, this is my
entry into the contest. And Bill takes one look and
he turns to Amanda goes, I'm going to buy him
an actual trash truck. That kid's life. He would be

(19:04):
so happy if that happened too. He would just sitting. Dude,
that boy's beautiful. Says that when the when they have
the when they when they hear the beeping noises of
the trash trucks, his face lights up and he sprints
to the door to go watch them do their thing.
But I remember Rocco had like a trash truck birthday,
kig right, Donald, Yeah, he loved trash trucks and for

(19:26):
a really long time we had to buy him little
tiny trash cans and it couldn't be the same color.
That had to be like a blue, a green, and
a black one to represent you know, recycling track all
that stuff, right, And he would walk around and so
the trash truck that he had, the lifter, broke, so
we had to buy him tongs so he could pretend

(19:48):
he was lifting the trash truck and dumping the trash.
In Christmas, his grandmother, my mother, bought him a bunch
of shredded paper from her office, Like it was like
a bunch of shredded sides. And he took that thing
in my house for like at least two weeks until

(20:09):
Casey was like enough with the motherfucking trash was littered
with shredded paper all over the place. It was all good,
but Casey wasn't having it at the end. But it
was such a like the love of trash trucks that
kids have. It's it's amazing. It's no you know. Mandy
was telling me that in the trash truck cab, the

(20:29):
drivers have all these drawings from children because they love
trash trucks so much. It's so sweet. They can't help it.
It's like one of the coolest things ever to them.
And and I was we were like, wow, Rocco really
loves this. He's taking a really long time in this phase.
And they were like, and somebody said to us, it's
because he's trying to figure out how they work. How
does the arm work, what's that sound for, why does

(20:51):
it deep when it's backing up. How come he can
hear it all the way from down the block? You
know what I mean? House, This dude has his legs
up on the coffee table with his little snack watching
YouTube videos of trash trucks. That was Rocko, and we
would have to put on like the hour and a
half version of it, and all it is a show him.

(21:11):
She wants to show him. I'm fucking a normal kid show.
And he just wants to watch videos of trash trucks
all around the world, right, and it has to be
specific ones too. The arm, I mean the arm obviously
cool part, you know, always one right? All right, Bill,
we do not want you to count us in. We're
begging you not to count us. Don't you join Bill?
You want to do it. I want to do it.

(21:32):
Stories about show we made about a bunch of domes
and nurses said the stories yeadoo around here? Are yeadoo
around here? Who is Bonnie psycho Wits? Bill? She wrote

(21:58):
this episode. Bonnie psych Wits is a young comedy writer
married to Mike psych Witz, who I wrote with on Friends,
and she wrote on for Gary Goldberg for a good
period of time, And so I had known her for
a while, So how did that work? Just explain to
people on the business that occasionally a writer outside the
normal writers room will write a script. What's that about.

(22:20):
Back in the old days with network shows, especially when
there'd be twenty two to like twenty six episodes, you
would sometimes assign a couple of freelance scripts out because
there are ways for writers that kind of you know,
we're still you know, kind of trying to find their
way onto a staff to make some money and find
an in into the guild and to help insurance and
all that stuff. And you know, is the equivalent of

(22:41):
the old days? Is that not a thing anymore? Yeah?
Nowadays it's it's almost the same price to have a
staff writer, you know what. They change the system a
little bit so that like when you see a staff
writer on a show, they don't get paid for the
scripts even if they write one. Staff writers And so
I think the Guild was trying to create a situation
that it was almost the same price to have a
daff writer for six or eight weeks, so they get

(23:02):
the experience of being on a staff as it was
to give some of the freelance script. Got it. I
never knew that. And I believe this is Victor Nelly's
first episode. Do you know if that's the true or not.
You should check it out. But he became a regular
on this. He's a good looked at it for me.
He's a very good dude, and he's a very good director.
And um, I don't think it was his first episode.
I think his first episode was the one where we're

(23:23):
at the funeral and uh, George, not the famous funeral,
George Wallace. Funeral George Wallace. Yeah, George Wallace imagining someone's
funeral and you imagine yourself being dead, fooling everybody so
that you could, uh George Wallace, like the party all
the time, it's you imagining your funeral. That was That
was a Victor Victor Nellie episode. I think that was

(23:44):
first for those of you. This is four twenty two
and we're flashing back to the moment where Carla and
I kiss. Now, in rewatching the kiss, you do see
that lips are parted. Lips are definitely it looks it
does it's not. It doesn't look innocent and all times
are not pursed. Bro, it does not look innocent at all.
You guys are drinking a deal. It's like as a

(24:06):
pruder tape, You're like, okay, let me look, Oh no,
did you say as an accident? And she's giggling and
you're both supposed to be hammered. You seem to enjoy
it too much as actual actor actress though, I mean
the real people. I feel like the real j D
and the real Judy enjoyed it. Well. Listen, I gotta
say I we talked about this last week, um, and
I was very upset watching it because I was like,

(24:27):
I would never This is Victor's first directing episode, so
Bill and I Bill, you weren't here last week. But Donald,
we're very upset watching this kiss because it just felt wrong,
even this many years later. But um, but no, as
you rewatch it, it wasn't just a purse lip kiss.
There was there were there were opened lips. There was
no tongue, but the lips were the lips were open.

(24:47):
But I was like a lip sandwich, layers of a
lip sandwich. You look, it's soap opera. It's a it's
why it's a it's a. It's a metaphor for I
feel this where this episode comes in time and when
where your podcast is right. It was just so interesting
because it's it's like the halfway point, you know what
I mean for this show, and on the one hand,
we knew what we were doing and there's a lot

(25:08):
of funny stuff. On the other hand, you know, I
felt like this is right where the show was teetering
a little bit. We could have easily gotten tired, you
know what I mean, because we had done I think
we had done almost eighty something episodes of the show
by now, you know, and yeah, exactly and that. But
instead that, you know, I felt like everybody kind of
reinvigorated themselves the fifth season and went absolutely bat nuts crazy.

(25:30):
So the so it's season it's a very is a
very good one, I remember. But it's a lot of pressure,
don't you guys feeling the pressure on your podcast right
now in terms of if you go along, go along,
go along? You know, this is what's so interesting. When
you used to do shows for nine years, you reach
a point that you know how to do it, you're
doing it well and people enjoy it. But it's very
easy to get overly comfortable and complace it right, and

(25:52):
so then you have to go, do we either mix
it up or do we reinvigorate. Yeah, well, we're trying
to do that in a sense because we also love
the four of us love doing it so much, and
we see obviously there's a there's an end to it,
and we go, well, that's why we've been folding in
some interviews here and there, because we we all kind
of want to find a way to keep doing. We
jokingly say we're gonna do a rewatch podcast of another show,

(26:12):
but I think you should do a rewisten podcast of
the original podcast. I think you should go back. I
think you re listen to this and then evaluate each
episode and where you're getting. I don't know. I like,
I think we have fun when we really I mean,
I know it's sort of everyone's doing it, but we
really do like enjoy interviewing people that are super interesting

(26:35):
and and maybe maybe we'll do our own version of that.
I don't know, to be determined. We also we have
to think about it for four more seasons. So I
also think I would love watching you guys do a
rewatch podcast of a show that neither of you is on.
We're on in case you have different opinions and stuff
like that. I still let's rewatch the Office because there's
already been a rewatch podcast, but Donald doesn't want to

(26:58):
do that, and I want to do a different world
Old Man or something like that that such area try
to do that well. I mean, I could joke about
dramas all day. I think it has to No, No,
I think I think it's the obvious thing is it
has to be a show with an overlapping fan base
the Scrubs like Community or something where it's where it's
the people that listen to this and love Scrubs, you know,

(27:22):
feel the same way about another show, and we you know,
then they then they all stay tuned. That seems logical,
and we should do short lived shows so each season
is like we should do like Parker Lewis, can't lose
development what I mean, Yeah, shows that were really good.
But we could do comedies we grew up with, like
you know, Eddie Murphy movies of the eighties. You know,
Oh my gosh, I could talk about I could talk

(27:43):
about Eddie Murphy all day long, you know that, buddy?
All right, we let's keep going. So Christa and that Wow,
I wrote down. I wrote down the words lucky Man, Bill,
I wrote down between your bosoms ma'am made me happy.
He looks fantastic. I don't know if I could. I

(28:04):
think my wife has an amazing body, but I don't
know if I would show it off to everyone. Yes,
you'd be proud of that. Well there was that one time.
You're right, well, your wife is on Your wife is
very sexy and um, and I think he would be
proud to see. There was that one time. I do remember,
but I was shit facing drunk, and yeah, there was
that one time. But yes, look Krista. To give Krista props.

(28:27):
She's so shit you know about she's so game for
anything man, and her willingness to poke fun of herself
and this thing, and it really made me laugh and small.
But the crazy thing is she doesn't look old at all.
I know, she looks hot. She looks hot as balls.
That dude's freaking. That dude's gay. That's why that's funny.
What's funny is I assume he's supposed to be like
the son of the next neighbor, but it looks like

(28:48):
he lives there alone for some reasons like Tom Hanks
in Big Why does this child live across the hall
from that? Um? And uh he but anyway, he calls
her mam, which spirals her out because she does not
like being called ma'm uh. You know I liked in
the very next scene. And you guys got to tell

(29:09):
me if you remember if she had better memories about
this being on set. I think this is one of
the last times that Ken Jenkins did his own stunt.
And he does his own fall and I do two
of those two and yeah, and he did what I do.
He does the what I do at a much younger age,
which was hurl. I mean, you have a map, but
you're still hurling yourself into the air and landing on

(29:30):
your back and uh. And he went for it, he
really did. I really like the next line too, because
then the janitor says, well, I've got you here, sir.
Right after the janitor is waxing the floors, and then
when because he wants a new uniform, he's taught and
he has drawings of the uniforms. I don't know if
you guys noticed a weird This is just for you
film geeks. There's like a there's a weird focus thing

(29:51):
on when the janitor is presenting his uniform ideas. Did
you notice that at all? I focuses on Ken's ear,
not the janitor. I didn't notice it. I I just
liked we did this a lot writing wise on this show.
And I can give you guys other examples. At one
point we were going to show all the pictures he drew,
and then we're like, it's funnier if we don't show them,
and people are just wondering drew, and we told Neil

(30:16):
to make stuff up because one of them was, that's
just a kangaroo sometimes I drawed kangaroo. Well, uh yeah,
so the janitor really wants to wait, we're skipping. One
other joke kindled the ground at the as this same
thing of the sign. It kind of reminded me of

(30:36):
when Scott Harris fell and they put the white tape
around where he fell and it stayed there for like
like it stayed there for like eight seasons. Scott Harris,
for the audience, was one of our assistant directors. And
I guess he fell and then the grips outlined his
body like he had been murdered with white tape. Yeah.
I think he broke something. He messed up his he

(30:58):
know he had he had a concussion. Yo. Okay, So
the first time. This is one of the best, Like,
this is one of the He's one of my good friends,
and so I can clown him a little bit and
he won't get upset about this season. I guess it
was season two. We're doing a basketball scene and we're
shooting around, and Bill would come to set whenever we

(31:19):
did basketball scenes and play around and play ball, and
you know, we'd let the extras play and everything like that,
and we'd always you know. But then it got time
to where we had to shoot and I was dunking
because we lowered the rim a little bit, and I'm
dunking and Scott said something stupid to me, something like
if it were a higher you couldn't do that. And
I said something like, you couldn't do that right now.

(31:41):
And I passed him the ball and he made the
face like I got this, and he dribbled and went
one two and blew his knee out. Three days later, Yeah, yeah,
out for the rest of the season. For the rest
of the season done. He didn't work on the show,
but the whole scenes is heard out, how's your how's

(32:02):
your leg? Zach? You got chopped on how's your a?
Bit by a Rot Wilder um if, oh my god,
what yes, do what everybody now? I'm fine. Um, it
was a it was a stunt with the dog. The
dog was trained to hold a throw blanket off of me.
And it's not the dog's fault. Um. The dog was

(32:23):
a beautiful dog and well trained. Um. But in the
joke is that I'm wrestling with the throw with the
dog and the blanket got pulled too close to my
arm and the dog just chopped down on my side. Zach,
Zach set me u screenshots of it, and it is
it's good and gross. Yes, well you got to see

(32:44):
my boxers. I'm sorry. Okay, it's okay, it's okay. Don't die, dude,
how do I show you this? That's just you're gonna
get it. You're gonna get it. Hey, oh oh my
chop that bruise too, jesus, Oh my god. That's a
chump getting bit by a rot while it hurts right.

(33:05):
Oh fuck, I'm so sorry that happened. I'm glad, you're okay.
I had to be immediately be like because the kids
were there. I didn't want the kids to be scared,
because again, it wasn't the dog's fault and it's you know,
it's basically a stunt gunner rye and shit happens. But
I was like holding it together, holding it together, and
I was like, I need a quick break. And then
they got all the kids out of the room and
I'm like, but I wanted to go. I was crying

(33:27):
on the inside. What does the dog have more scenes
in the movie or now? Um? The dog had seen
the next day and I was like, it was like
I was mad at it. We like we were like
we like had we like looked at each other and
then looked away from each other. No, again, it wasn't
in interrupting Bill on the show. Bill still interrupted interrupting

(33:53):
Bill Um quick question, Uh did Zach talk about getting
bit and buy a Rottwoerd today? Yeah, but only a
little bit, not of time. He was he was sad
about kay Um. Follow up question, follow up questions, Bill's
answer to bring it up on his own or Bill,
this is for you. Did you have to prompt him

(34:15):
about it? Um to set up this joke. I was surprised,
but I had to actually ask him about it because
I thought, you love makes sense. Actually it was probably
pretty painful, all right, Uh, Zach Donald Love the show? Bill,
you're killing it. Thanks. Oh my god, you are so ridiculous.

(34:40):
I love that you ended your own interruption by a
compliment of yourself. Who's the best thing ever? Oh my god,
you are so ridiculous. All right, we're gonna bring on.
I know it's gonna break right back. And we're back.

(35:12):
We've lost Donald. Oh my god, you're ridiculous. All right,
we're back, We're back. We're back. Yeah, we're back. Oh
my gosh, i'd say is mix it up a little bit.
That's why you get paid the big bucks. You're funny show.
Oh gosh, um, yeah, I get pit by Rotwader. But

(35:34):
I'm okay, and I can cross it. I can cross
it off my bucket list bit by Rottweader. Yes, Oh
it's fun um. So Jordan decides to boat TX her
face and Chris did a very funny job. Like literally
the only things that it doesn't even her lips don't
even move, it's just her teeth. She's like, and can
ask you guys a question, by the way about this

(35:56):
you and YouTube because it's Chris. What I said before,
She's game for all this stuff. When I asked her
to do it, She's like, you know that what happens
to all women on all shows is whether it's true
or not. Is true, A little is not true, a lot, whatever,
it is your main Internet traffic. What you hit forty
is work done? Picture of her face? Tire? Look at
her cheeks here? Yeah, and do you guys get these

(36:17):
guys to people do it to men and they say old,
that's true. They just did it too, that's true. That's true. Clearly,
he clearly did something. Something happened, something happened to him.
I mean, come on, I don't know what it was,
but something happened there. I mean, so interesting. If he
loves it, he loves it to each of their own. Hey,
but no, Donald and I you know, I just I

(36:39):
just I just shake my head at this point. But
whenever I post a picture of myself, someone be like, oh,
you got old, it's so sad. Or Donald gets taught
you they say he's tired, tired. I'm tired all the time.
But that was when I was smoking a crap ton
of weeks. Yeah, you do your skin, so you're probably
a little sleepy. Yeah. Well, now did he know he
because he because he stopped smoking so much? Is he
looks I stopped smoking period. Dude, I did you really? Yeah,

(37:00):
smoke weed right now, and I don't drink right now.
I've had a couple of drinks here and there, but like,
for the most part, I'm a sober man. I'm about
to hit four months no booze. My daughter said she
is California sober, which I did not know, but apparently
amongst the kids means weed only. Really no booze. That's great.
Oh my god, imagine doing that at twenty years old.

(37:21):
That's very advanced. Good for her. She just say, she
just said that. She's like, it made me happy because
you know, it's always scary to think, I mean, any
of your kids out there drinking, you know. But uh yeah,
she said, anytime I drink, I feel shitty the next day.
And she went to go home and go to bed
and h why bother. Wow, that's very very, very very

(37:43):
mature at twenty years old, because I was the opposite.
But I feel dude, I love the mornings now. I
never thought i'd be a morning person. So this is
just a disclaimer out there for all of you listening.
We're not telling you that you need to be sober
or say this or people fill our Instagram with like,
don't tell me what to do. We don't give it right,

(38:05):
you are. Everybody that likes this podcast needs to stop
drinking the point no point pound cloth. I do have
to say, though, pound your white cloth. Yeah, go have
your hot girl summer and pound. You know what I've
done is an old guy. I just cut it down

(38:25):
to two days a week tops, you know what I mean?
And because never having the silly couple of drinks that
go nowhere and just make you feel like shit the
next day. That's my big I just I just don't
you know it's it definitely is uh in my forties thing.
I noticed that I'm just less tired with you know,
and I'm not I'm not like full on like I'm
sure this summer I'm gonna have some drinks. I just
mean that, like, I noticeably feel better without drinking every

(38:47):
day or every other day. Anyway. Back to the show, right, guys,
let's talk about how JD says I can't use lip bomb.
I always end up eating it whatever. When I was little,
I used to spread it on cracking um. That is disgusting, gross.
I don't know where the hell you came up with that. William.

(39:09):
But dude, there's a lot of funny jokes in this man.
When I go, you kissed my wife? You know what?
That was inspired by? No, you shit on my house,
can't buy me love? Do you remember that? Yes? So
the way I say you kissed my wife is very
similar to how uh friends you fuck my wife? No? No, no,

(39:33):
that's a different cadence right there. Sorry, sorry. I liked
that Donald. I liked that Donald was able to Turk
was able to tell JD to sit on the floor
calmly in anger, and JD just does sit on the um. Now,

(39:53):
when the girls kissed to do it? Did you cut
away from that on purpose? Built because you didn't show it? Yeah,
we cut away on a person. It was just going
on pert one across the world. Did you have to
cut away with it like a sensory thing? No? No,
Look it was what I said before. It's like we
started to become enamored with and it also with Elliott
and the fantasy that they's got, the sexual fantasy that
guy Josh Randall has is we always think it's funny.

(40:16):
We got obsessed with jokes that the audience doesn't get
to see, and they just imagine like so in this
one it was just say you remember it was um
the drawings that you don't get to see. The janitor
changes off camera a number of times. I think one
of them. Zac says, who gets a tattoo of a mop?
He has a secret mop tattoo? Yeah, and then and
then it was uh, Judy and uh, I mean and

(40:39):
Carlo kissing. Yeah, well so they're kissing and we don't
see it, thanks a lot, Bill and um, and they
cut to Todd down in the cafeterias about to eat
a giant, very fallic hot dog, and he says, something
wonderful is happening. Yeah. I love that he's got a
giant ballicot dog. Because later when the janitor says, and
that's supposed at least right surgeon, right, So the janitor

(41:05):
has waxed everything, no matter where Kelsa goes. He waxed
the counter. That was funny, and the phone that was
really funny. We did a good job of of shooting
uh some of these site gags. I laughed and then up, Um. Yeah,
by the way, I watched Girls five EVA. Have you
seen him? It's it's it's very Scrubs esque funny. It's

(41:28):
Funny and John Inwood shooting it, our our cinematographer who
shot our whole show. He became a good director. Good
Donald Uh Deonte kisses uh Johnny's hand. Yeah, that's what
makes me laugh so hard. I didn't know that says
you have a god complex. He's like, no, I don't.

(41:51):
I didn't recognize him without his puka shell choker. But um, um,
so the janitor we learned has the tattoo of up
as Bill said, and um what about that fantasy the
turk has where I just I started making it with
Judy and I put her legs up. I put the
legs I'm Judy as performers are having too much fun.

(42:13):
I want to hear Donald's take on it, but I
don't think it's said in the script that he puts
her leg over fun. Remember when Sarah was dressed as
a naughty nurse. What we're talking about, we want something
different right now, And we were joking around like it
felt like kissing my sister. This doesn't look like you
guys felt like you were kissing. This looked like some

(42:34):
pent up sexual energy that you had. Judy is fine
as hell and was happy to pretend to make out
with her. Let's put it that way, but putting her
leg up, I'm sure in the script didn't say he
then puts her leg but I did not write. I
did not write he then grabs her leg and puts
it over his own soul. But it was funny though

(42:56):
it was funny. Um, what about yes? So then Todd
goes that color really brings out your package with the janitor.
So the janitor is all thrown out of whack because
no one finds him scary in it is it is
uh an rip uh moment. But my favorite version of

(43:18):
it is seeing Sam Lloyd not terrified by the janitor
for a and h He's got his orange tie. That's
the best one. He gets punched. At the end, he goes, oh,
I'm going home because Kelso has done the research. The
yellow makes people angry and the janet and Sam Lloyd
gets keep getting punched because he's wearing a yellow time

(43:41):
just in the same arm. Um. I saw a moment
we jumped over that remind me how funny Sarah Chalk
is because she talks about being a teen girl and
that's the age that your breasts grow, and then she
casually says not always symmetrically. Spoiler aler, is that really
a thing I wondered to breast grow a set? Yes?

(44:05):
It was really not. Always that's funny, Sarah, Sarah really is.
So it was really funny in this episode. Oh, she
was so good at it. She blamed his curls. You know,
John that um Carla's sucking on my fingers. Yeah, that

(44:27):
got that got See what I'm saying, and that's my face.
But I'm in ecstasy. Yeah. I laughed really hard at that.
I've got my eyes rolled back in my head and
I'm like, and my lips are moving. Yeah. By the way,
it's when it pans over to you and finds you.
I did not expect that and had forgotten that joke.
There's two jokes I had forgotten I wrote down, and
they're both in a row. One is I had forgotten

(44:49):
that when she was sucking your fingers, we'd reveal your
eyes up in your head. And then the other one
that I forgot, which is right after that the act
break is Donald gets mad at you guys in the
cap materia, and when we come back, the whole cafeterias demolished.
Donald goes Obviously I overreacted in the world of the show,

(45:11):
Turk took the time to destroy the entire cafeteria. Cafeteria, Yes,
everybody's gone, And Zach, you casually have a tomato slice
on your forehead. Still I'm still trying to calm him down.
It's just like this, he's not obviously made it on
my forehead. Obviously, I obviously I got out, I got

(45:31):
a little out of control. No no, no, no, no, no, no,
You're fine. I mean that must have taken twenty minutes.
I mean, you really raged. We were like the home
that really made me. But again, another one of those jokes.
This is the point that we would stumble onto something
the writer's room and go, this is funny, let's try it.
But it's like the sixth joke in this show that happens.

(45:52):
You don't get to see it happen, you know what
I mean, You just get to imagine what happened. And
what about However, but I tell you Carla that I
had sex with Tuns turks family housekeeper, and then she
was she was buffing the nightstand, and then she just
kept that shit had me rolling too. That had me rolling,
and then the speech in between that had me rolling

(46:13):
where you guys are talking about who's gonna take the blame,
and you're like, thank you for you know, you tell
her thank you for taking it. She goes get out
of here. All you're gonna do is God, And then
you guys gonna be fine. He's and you're like, get
out of here. All you're gonna do is have sex
with him. And if I have sex with him, he'll
probably just end up even matter at me. No, dude.
It was the funny part about it was that I'm like,
he'll probably like, like there's anything, there's a chance I

(46:35):
could go either way. If I fuck him, it could
go either way, but most likely I'm leaning I'm leaning
to him being matter right. That was very funny. Now,
so normally when someone is a magazine in a TV show,
you folks not in the business, you not only don't
get the rights to the real magazine because you don't
have the rights to the pictures and everything. So they
have these fake magazines. So the teenage girl in this,

(46:55):
if you look at the magazine, all right, it says
totally teen on the front, right, but done on the back.
There's all these faces and they're just they're just scrambled
like no one the time, Like you could have bought
stock art of like licensable pictures of teens, like, but
they just That's what I'm telling you this is that
this is right when the show was teetering on are
we gonna mail it in? Or are we gonna were
still one in the prop department, no offense mail done

(47:17):
it because all they did we just scramble the teen's
faces on the back of the magazine I was mailed
it in. Is that what you're saying, don't he'll do
it first. He'll be like koolaid out of nowhere. Oh yeah,
I love our prop department. I just think it's funny
that the Teen Magazine wasn't the most believable prop ever made.

(47:37):
I will tell you guys that what I'm so appreciative
of you two and everybody because these are the episodes.
When I go back and watch him, I'm like, all right,
we've kind of done a story like this before, and
we're not breaking new ground with this stuff writing wise,
but the performers are so good. It's still you know,
just talking about donaldon when we come back from the
break or Zach, I bet you kept on Buffing wasn't

(47:59):
really we'll have to see, you know what I mean?
And uh uh And then for me right after that
because I remember this. Um. We wrote in the script
that Neil Flynn walks around with that weird camera you
know what, it's called zacht is on his face. Yeah,
there's different names for it, but it's actually mounted to

(48:20):
to Neil. Um and that was really clever. I'm assuring
that was a Victor Nelly thing, right or is that
you're right? Yeah? But what was it for me? Is
the inspiring part? Is all it said in the script
was Neil walks around reacting to people that aren't afraid
of him and just watching what he was riffing as
he can't because they were all extras. They would you know,
they did that, Victor did that explained to people that
there's no way he could have done those at the

(48:40):
same time, Victor, you know what I mean? Right? So
so that what you do is that you know, and
you've seen this in certain films before, but you're the
way to mount the camera to someone's body and uh
and uh and and we had never done a look
like that in five in four seasons of Scrubs, So
it's cool. It's a testament to Bill that a director
comes in and goes, hey, I have anna of the
bar way, how to do this sequence? Are you down

(49:01):
with it? And he's like, yeah, go for it, and
you know, it was kind of a unique way to
say to just show the janitor's changed perspective and just
watching him do happy birthday, all right, whatever, and once
you keep moving. Just watching Neil react to no one
is one of those inspiring moments that you guys all
have in this episode. Then it was come on, get happy?
Is that what it was? Yeah? And uh, the only

(49:22):
one that was scripted was stopping at Jordan, you know,
because it the director had to go and Jordan, who
has no expression, and then you'll just shakes it off
and keeps moving. Um. But the point is, you guys
are all so good. When you get a show that
lasts a long time, I don't know if I'll happen anymore.
It's the actors and actresses that carry it through the
middle when the writers get a little punch drunk and

(49:43):
then hopefully they kind of get reinvigorated, which I think
we really did well. Bill. I got to say, you know, um,
one thing you really set the you know, you set
the table with our ability to do this, and I'm
doing it on on Cheaper by the dozen now and
it's so fun. It's like we always get the words
as written, not of respect for all the hard work
you guys put in, and then if we have an idea,
we do it. Sometimes it's not nearly as funny. Sometimes

(50:06):
you just strike gold and it's funnier and um, it's
such a fun way for comedic actors to work. It's
so freeing. I love it well. It enables you to
kind of lean on each other too, especially when you're
in that grind of having to do twenty six episodes
a year or something. You know, I was one. This
was one of those years where we did more than
twenty two episodes too. I think so, I think, so
I'd have to check I have it right here. We
did twenty five. Oh, that is a lot. That's a

(50:29):
lot of TV. That's pretty much the whole year, almost man,
a lot of collision. Favorite a week off after three
to catch up writing wise. Yeah, and sometimes favorite memories
of the show are when you when we would come,
when you'd come to the set and we'd rehearse, and
we'd and we'd just make it better wed whether it
was your joke or our joke, or some funny blocking
or the director's idea just going this was already funny,

(50:52):
and we just made it ten times funnier. That was that.
That was the most fun I ever had on the Unscrubs.
I loved it. Um that's I missed those things too.
Still look at this stuff and I go, we could
have done better as right? You know what? It struck
me in this one. We should have called back rolling
your victory dance Coach? So funny did that come from?
I was laughing. It's so funny, By the way, all

(51:16):
we had to do this is what This is why
streaming is so cool. You didn't do this in network
because hopefully people like that, Hopefully he went on to
do other stuff, whoever that actor was, and they aren't
around your world. In a streaming version of Scrubs, uh,
Rolling the Victory Dance Coach, you would have had this
one scene and then a year later, when you did
a great victory dance impromptu as you did in the show,

(51:36):
you would cut to uh, you know, just the other side,
and Rolling would be there going like this, pumping his army.
But do you remember what the genesis of this was.
I don't even remember that actor at all. No, but
he was funny. He was very funny, and he go,
I go, thanks, Roland. One day, I'll get it. He

(51:57):
was just helping out with your victory dance set up. Um,
and then Jerk we find and then Donald, we finally kissed. Yeah,
but it was an awkward kiss. I think it might
have been our first and only kiss. I have we
ever really, I think our lips have never really held
togethers have touched, tips have touched. We docked, we've docked,

(52:18):
but I don't think that we um know, yes, we've docked. Donald, Yeah,
but like like, but I don't think we've ever kissed.
It was also disingenuous because you said this is all
it was, and that's not what it was. No, it's
right because there was open milk lip sandwich. There was lip.
You say, open milf lip sandwich. No, well she is now,

(52:40):
but it was lip lip lip lip, you know what
I mean, A lip stack, like a stack of pancakes.
That's right. And then my my last two jokes, we
should have done that. My last two jokes were I'm
going home from Sam just made me laugh so hard
that but you were the last one to hit him
too with the karate hit. By the way, he's not

(53:04):
mad at you. He knows it's again. I'm going on,
why did I write down boobies boobies boobies? Who says,
is that's where Donald uh St slept with the he
slew with a stripper at that time at boobies Booby
and Donald says that was you. You're like, yeah, but
I gave her your name. I really, I really love
the name of the strip club. Was Booty the worst

(53:25):
strip club ever? No, it would be a great name
for a strip club. I know what you get Tampa
in Tampa. The last joke I had was the janitor
talking to birds, and I didn't understand it because why
isn't he trying to kill these things and stuff him?
The only squirrels only into squirrels. He's only in the
squirrel My last joke, and that is it. I didn't

(53:46):
know if I liked at the beginning, when you were
thinking about the progression of relationships, you know what I mean?
I thought it was a little because we didn't shoot
it great. Remember, we had to kind of speed up
and slow down when you're like, yeah, when a couple
of meats a couple of this, couple of that. Then
I thought of the circus for summer reason, there's a
clown and dead juggling is too surreal, but I liked
those though I wish it was fantasy. I wish it

(54:07):
was a fantasy, but I loved the call back at
the end when you go to Donald quit acting like
some weird cowboy and he goes cowboy. You go, I
don't know, I just popped into my head and there's
no reason cowboy onoto Bill, why is there? Why is
there a fully dressed cowboy in the hospital. You probably
got hurt at the rodeo, man, by the way, the

(54:27):
rodeo and wherever we live. When we scripted it, I
think we probably thought it would be just a dude
with jeans and cowboy boots and the cowboy hat. But
that was a full cowboy. That was full cowboy. He
had everything. He went full cowboy. Um, Joel, do you
have a guest here? Here? We're gonna hearing a quick
break and when we come back, we'll be back with
the guests, and le Bill Lawrence would be right back,

(54:53):
and we're back, and we're back now, Daniel, can you
play the new song live? Because I really do like
to hear it. Oh? Yeah, absolutely, saw you have a
new song that that intros the guests, written by our
friend and supporter Travvy Wabby and the way Donald you
didn't reply to my sort of rough drafts of a
of a Casey theme song. I like the idea of

(55:14):
a Casey theme song. It's just you didn't like my
rough draft. No. I thought it was fire. You didn't reply,
you didn't say it. I want to lay down the vocal. Cool,
who's gonna sing that? It's me? I want Donald to
sing it? Okay, Charlotte saying the interrupting Bill thing. I'm
gonna have Charlotte Andrew Watt produce it yet produced Charlotte

(55:36):
doing it. But wait, Joel, will you coordinate please? Donald
singing the new track that I wrote Travvy Wavy can
produce it, but that I wrote for Casey's coming to
give a parental advice. Okay, Bill, here is a new
Travvy Wabby track to introduce our guests. We got a so,

(56:01):
you know, like a maybe talking about the episode. So
come on, let's get the show wait for us? Oh,
I like that. Yeah, hey, is that trumpet? I think
it's a thing on it with trump trumpet with one

(56:24):
of those things you put on the end of look cool.
I like that. That's great. Travy Webby, thank you, and um,
let's bring our I like how it there's a subtle
dig in there. It's like and maybe talk about the episode.
I no I noticed that. Bring on the guests, please,
ladies and gentlemen, give that up. Shall and Jose Welcome

(56:49):
to the show, guys. Um, we're so happy you're here. Um, Joel,
give us an introduction to how you chose these two
lovely people. Yeah, of course. Okay, So we had a
big conversation last week. I wasn't sharing who that wasn't

(57:12):
was going to respond to the request of people who
have slept with their partners best friends, but our listeners
did not. There was literally a tsunamia, people being like, yo,
I did it or it happened to me? Um, And
so you know, Michelle wrote in sharing her story and
I was like, we have to get her on the
podcast to talk about this. All right, So listen, guys,

(57:38):
if this is a way to have Zach Ordonald tell
me that they hooked up with Chris at something. No
crossing the line, Zach, you are crossing the he knows
I've had a few erotic dreams. Oh my god. Um,
so wait, guys, we're so glad you're here reminding you.

(57:58):
If you didn't hear last week's episode. Uh, JD and
uh and Carla hook up. They just kiss um. But
we were talking about, Oh my gosh, it's so horrible.
How could a friendship ever recover from that? And I
jokingly said to Joelle Well, I said on the air,
I wonder if there's a couples that would come on
and talk about that. And then Joelle's email got filled
with people that had, oh you got to hear my story,

(58:20):
my story, and she selected Michelle and Joseph. So, guys, go,
how did it happen? What went down? Well, first, I
feel honored that the email is flooded and I got picked.
I guess it was my septic line. But by the way,
we had such good humor about this already. It's just
a tip of the hat to you outstand it. Okay, Michelle,

(58:41):
how did it happen? What happened? So? Um, Obviously we've
all been in quarantine for the past year and Um,
his best friend was kind of in our bubble. He
recently went through a divorce right as quarantine was getting started.
He was really lonely, so like we just we scooped
him up into our arms. We've known him for ten years, like,
you know, come in. You know, every week he would
come over and you would just hang out, and you

(59:05):
know there lots of alcohol was consumed. Everything that's happened
has been sober. Let me just say that. Um, but
we just kind of realized that there was a little
bit of a spark there. And my husband and I
have been married for ten years. We've known each other
for seventeen years. We met in high school. We have

(59:25):
literally been the only people we've ever been with. Do
you guys grow up together? Like same town, same it,
forever and ever and ever type of thing, pretty close
like a town over very small Midwestern towns, so very
Midwestern sensibilities on a lot of them. And you guys,
you just said you you ran by it. But you
two have only been with each other, correct, Okay, all right,
well okay until recently, but we should have like a

(59:49):
Jerry Springer kind of show into Wait, but this doesn't
sound Jerry springerish. This sounds more like the what was
the movie The Big Chill? Was that? The one where
they're all hanging out in the cabin together. Yeah, that's
a great movie. Yeah, wonderful. Okay, Donald, Donald Zack, do
you see that? Just keep moving further back. Bill's getting

(01:00:14):
in the bathroom soon, all right, Michelle, gone ahead? Okay,
I love it. Um. We actually met on a blind
date at a high school dance and never looked back.
So we've been the only ones, you know, and we
are totally in love and still are two kids, and
they're upstairs and I'm surprised they haven't killed themselves, Sir,

(01:00:34):
killed each other while we were waiting for you guys.
So we've been waiting so long. She's actually fucked two
of my friends. I'm talking about my build out. Look
at Bill, Bills, Bill's leaving you get him. I knew
this is gonna make a Bill uncomfortable. First of all,

(01:00:56):
you guys are so evolved that you can't even talk
about like this. But I continue because I'm on the
edge my seat, So um if I can interjact real
quick too, And this isn't anything bad, but like, we
do have two kids, young kids, Um, and you have
really faced the brunt of the quarantine with them. So
for the last year, you've been working from home, and

(01:01:17):
we kept our kids home for the majority of the pandemic,
So not only being able to interact with any adults
whatsoever besides each other, you were also with two children
eight year old and a five year old twenty four
to seven, Oka or Joseph, You're already way, You're already
way to understanding, all right, Michelle, But I don't understand

(01:01:43):
a headspace there because I was able to kind of
like my job. I was able to get out and
that I wasn't like going and winding and dining people
or anything, but at least I had other human interaction,
whereas like, I can see how you're craving something that
isn't being Michelle continue please, Um, So I had I

(01:02:04):
started to have these feelings like what if, like life
is so short, like I we are going to be
together forever? Like I was just curious, and so I
actually approached him and we had many many conversations about it. Um.
He was a little hesitant first, understandably because I'm great
and he didn't want to lose and I, I mean

(01:02:27):
I think it goes without saying I'm much other person.
I'm sorry, Bill is now hiding under a flag ahead.
Oh wait, so when you say you approached him, you
mean you mean you mean Jack? You your okay, get crazy?
So this is a different takes of turn. You ask
permission from Joe to experiment? Okay, yes, yes, I said, um,

(01:02:51):
you know, I have these feelings and like I was
going to put myself out there and ask this other
person and they could possibly say what are you? Are
you crazy? Like why would I do that? Um? So
after many talks, we said yes and like just open
communication about the whole thing. So I asked the other
person and he's like, heck, yeah, yeah, that's that's the

(01:03:14):
only thing I could have predicted about this whole thing.
This other guy, I'm like, would you be interested in
kind of no strings attached hook up and you're not
gonna believe this, you know, me being attractive and and
she said yeah, I'm like no, wait, Joseph, this is
your friend too, So you did he did you? And
he talking out like you're I'm gonna give you permission

(01:03:37):
to have sex with my wife. You know we have
we have like an unspoken bond. I feel like, like
I've known this guy for a long long time, and
I this sounds really weird, but I think of him
as more of like a brother, So maybe that gets
into a weird family tree. Is a wreath type of
situation here, but it was we made Bill Lawrence uncomfortable.

(01:04:04):
By the way, this is going to be in Ted
Last though, season three. So all right, so continue, How
did it go down? I mean, you don't have no,
you don't have to be graphic, but tell us it
will not be details. Don't don't know details, But I'm saying,
how okay you can without telling his details? How did
the night itself go down? Like? How does it happen?
And I might marge in the aftermath too, is if

(01:04:26):
the afterwards of it? Yeah, okay, all right, Like was
Joseph in the house? Did Joseph threw out for beers?
Like what happened? So let me preface this by saying
that this friend comes over every week. Still he was
just up last night. We stayed up till three o'clock
in the morning, listening to music and just hanging out
like has not affected the friendship whatsoever. Um, So basically

(01:04:46):
the arrangement is every other week I go over to
our friend's house. He's single. I go over there, we
hang out, do whatever, um, and then I come home
and oh, it's an ongoing it's an ongoing thing. Oh yeah,
Oh so I have a question. Are you guys? I
mean question, are you guys perhaps swingers? I mean that's

(01:05:08):
a very common thing. No before this, like if anyone
were to like find out and a few people know,
but not many. But like I am, as he said,
we have very Midwestern sensibilities, Like we grew up very traditionally,
and like this is not anything that was ever in
the ballpark, like, but I feel like as we got older,
like we kind of matured, you know, like sexually and everything.

(01:05:32):
Well you've got more experimental and stuff, and like we've
been together for seventeen years, so like you know, now Joseph,
the old Joseph. The obvious question is are you allowed Yeah,
Joseph is a two way street? Are you allowed to
do that? If they're get that? And is there a
way that Zach Donald and I can make that happen
for you? Well, now I find out that I'm allowed to.

(01:05:53):
But you never asked before? If you never saw on
the table, Joseph, you never thought to ask, Okay, I'm
gonna do this for which is which most men I
am assuming or couldn't do. But you never thought to ask,
will I be allowed the same luxury we did. We
did talk about that. That's part of the conversation, and

(01:06:13):
he does have permission. I don't have any really good
friends that you would want to. It has to be somebody.
It has to be somebody that you guys both know,
is what you're saying. It can't be just some random
I mean it could if he wanted to. I would
want to know who it is, um, and be open
about it. I like, I don't think that this would

(01:06:34):
evolve into like just meeting somebody in a back alley.
But we've got some people that he has crush out.
We've got our eye on a couple of people. No,
not really, UM, where's flow? You know? Got interesting people? Okay? No, wait,

(01:06:57):
So I just I just I'm speechless. But I we've
all seen those of us who aren't swingers. I've seen
documentaries and stuff on TV, and this seems to me
and like an open sort of relationship where there's a
bit of an agreement. And I just wonder if that's
what you guys have segued into. It sounds like it
to me, right or no. I mean it's a fairly

(01:07:18):
recent development, like the past couple of months, And part
of it is the experimentation. Part of it is the person,
you know, the friend Like I'm you know, I would
never at this point at least to be like, hey,
I met somebody, you know, I've known them for a month,
Like I'm going to go off and do this thing
with them, Like there is still that very deep friendship

(01:07:39):
with this person who I'm very good friends with two
So it's just like it's totally a friends with benefits
type of situation. Joe, You're able to still see him
and be like, hey man, how you doing. Yeah? Yeah,
I mean it really hasn't changed our relationship, you know,
like we've always we've always been close. In fact, when
you mention it that you wanted to do this, I

(01:08:02):
was like, do you want me there? Yeah? It would
you have wanted to have been there if she said yes?
I mean maybe for moral support, like like a high five,
Oh my god? Or do not understand this generation. I'm

(01:08:27):
don't understand this generation. This is a very rare I mean,
I don't mean listen, I don't know anything about this
kind of world. I certainly don't could not handle this.
I know you two couldn't handle this. The only way
if I if, by the way, the only way that
anyone would hear the story of me hooking up with
my wife's friend would be on date line and they
would be doing Yeah, they would be trying to figure

(01:08:49):
out what happened to Bill Lawrence. At the end, they
would go, why is all the carpeting removed from Christen's
card trunk? And why I'm just too jealous? And I
would just get in my head about it. Even if
even if I was allowed to do the same thing,
I think I'm just too jealous for that kind of thing. Well,
you guys seem to communicate in ways that young couples

(01:09:10):
often don't, which is fairly impressive. But have you've never
been a jealous guy before in your life? Are you
not a jealous person? I only recently got hot, so
hap I like, I don't see myself as like a
typical elfha male type of guy. And like when when

(01:09:31):
this whole topic was broached, there was my gut reaction
was like I should be really pissed off about this
because that's what guys do in this situation. Yeah, there's
a gender norms or whatever. Yeah, And I'm like, well,
how much of that is my actual feeling and how
much is it what I'm supposed to do? And we
talked about this, and I was like, people like in movies,

(01:09:54):
people and relationships over this, Like people kill each other
over things like this. But it's like, but like, I mean,
other than the shock of first hearing it, I was like,
you know, it's fine, It's it's just sex, you know, like, yeah, um,
that's all. But I mean, but I mean, the human
heart is fragile, uh, and you have to be very

(01:10:15):
confident that you're not being very very confident. My fear
would be Joseph that you know, the obvious that she
would start to develop a more feelings for him, or
that they're having better sex or you know, I would
I would just Well, now that you bring that up,
I think I do have a couple of questions. I
don't want to I don't want to ruin your guy situation.

(01:10:37):
I'm joking. We we we talked about all that, you know,
in a lot of it came down to what my
initial objections were all about me how it made me feel,
and it became more of like I didn't want this
because of my own ego, and you had told me, like,
this is completely not about you, This is about me

(01:11:00):
as in you and it once I understood that that
it wasn't like I was or you were missing something
from me. It was something that you were giving to yourself,
I guess I understood it better. Yeah, And I will
say like through all of this, like I feel like
our relationship has gotten deeper on another level, Like there's

(01:11:22):
this trust that we have and we've always had it,
but like the fact that you were able to take
a step back from yourself and you know, see what
I wanted. And I have always been a giver, like
I take care of our kids endlessly. I take care
of everything. I think like he he would be dead
if I left, is part of it. I'm very reliant.

(01:11:47):
So I will say that, you know, it seems that
it could help prolong I mean, on the plus side
of it could be prolonged your relationship because you clearly
love each other very much and you don't want to
there's not that desire to to be unfaithful because it's
all out in the open. You've you've you've spoken about it.
I mean that would let's see. I just I don't know, man,

(01:12:10):
my lungs got tight thinking about it. What do you
have to say about this? Um? You know? I feel
like if it's what you if you guys have come
to an agreement and you both are understanding, you know,
who is anybody to judge? You know what I mean?
This is your life, this is your marriage. What makes
you happy is what makes you happy. So absolutely, if

(01:12:31):
this is something you guys are both agreeing on, that
you both agree on, go for yours. Man, I will
say this. My wife would fucking murder me if I
stepped to her and was like, yo, So let me
just say this. I'm doing a show with this girl

(01:12:52):
and she's The good news is she's great. Great's awesome.
I might just have Chris, so listen to this episode
of the podcast. Is so happy this couple sounds. Honestly,
one of the things that made me really excited to
come on here is like this is a new thing

(01:13:13):
for us, and like we talk about it like it's
you know, it's it's evolving, and like, you know, I
feel really good about it. But you don't hear people
talk about this stuff. And you know, if someone listens
to this and be like, hey, like this is a
good example, like it can work because, like you said,
in movies and in shows, you you know, the best
friends leaves with the life and then things fell apart.

(01:13:35):
I don't think. I don't think what you guys are
doing is out of the is an ordinary. There's a
whole bunch of people that live this way. But also
another thing is you didn't do it. You didn't cheat,
You spoken exactly, exactly, and you came to an agreement
without um, you know, going behind the other person's back,

(01:13:58):
which which betrayal is is so horrible. It's such a
horrible feeling. So you didn't betray each other. You were
open about it, and it just just so happens. You
you married a man who was who was open to it.
That that that is a that is a different thing.
Um means you're probably a good match you too. Yeah. Absolutely,
I do feel like Joseph should have his chance, though,

(01:14:19):
but I don't want to suck anything else. He absolutely can.
We have we have joked about Joseph looked through her,
looked through all her friend photographs. Can you say an
automatic return guest visit when if Joseph ever, Oh, you

(01:14:41):
know how much stress that's just put on? This feels
I feel like LORI. If it happens for Joseph and
he enjoys himself, we'd be willing to pay for them
to go out with it. He said, yes, go on
date if you guys pay for it. Feels it feels
very um fragile. I don't want to fuck up the

(01:15:03):
thing you have. You guys have, guys got a pretty ecosystem.
I think Joseph should come back on. You should both
come back on when Joseph has had his turn, and
we'll check it. Do you guys have any questions for us? Or? Oh?
We do? I totally forgot about the question. Go ahead,

(01:15:26):
go ahead, we're going along, so maybe just do one
question and then it's a great question. Okay, good, So
Zack and Donald, besides scrubs, what is your favorite thing
that the other person has been involved in, like a show,
a movie. Besides, I'm not allowed to talk about what
Zach's involved in that I really really enjoy because it's well,

(01:15:48):
you can pick something else other than the top secret project.
I um I I guess I'm gonna pick an obvious one.
I'm sorry, but I know. The joke on here is
that it took me forever to watch Remember the Titans,
but when I finally did, I was genuinely blown away
by Donald's acting in the movie. I thought, you know,
I know Donald mostly as a comedian, and I love

(01:16:10):
him as a comedian comedic actor, and of course he
is some comic relief in the movie, but I just thought,
watching I was so proud when I watched him go
toe to toe with fucking Denzel Washington, probably one of
the greatest live not probably definitely one of the greatest
living actors there is, and I was blown away by
how good he wasn't that movie. Ever, So when I
first met Zach, you know, we joked that I didn't

(01:16:31):
read Garden State, but there are some other scripts that
were well, two scripts that he gave me that I
read that we won't talk about on the show, and
I just I'm I'm amazed. First of all, I'm amazed
by how bright Zach is like when it comes to
business and when it comes to creating things. He's, in

(01:16:52):
my opinion, him and Bill are like they freaking blow
my mind every time. And the things that they the
things that they think about, and the goals that they
you know, come you know, come at things with always
blows my mind. But Zach is an amazing storyteller. He's
an amazing storyteller. From writing it to directing it, he's
amazing at it. And and solos You're gonna be blown away. Now,

(01:17:18):
I haven't watched it yet. I haven't watched it. You guys,
watch it. What's going to thank you? See there we go?
Maybe shotguard. Maybe you can watch you when you're at
what's his name's house. But I feel like I feel
like I'm a very lucky person to have these two
in my life, because you know, I'm getting to the

(01:17:40):
point now where I am starting to create things. And
to know that I have two best friends that I
can be like, yo, can you just look at this
and just tell me if I'm headed in the right
direction is a great comfort for me. So wow, that
was a good question. And we love you for a
great answers, man. And and we're going to work work

(01:18:02):
with Bill again one day on something because we three
of us are a good are a good trio. There
was a cool surprise one going now, Zach, Yes, there's
a top secret one that is in development. Donald probably
doesn't even know how juicy it currently is. All right, listen,
we uh that you guys. I think you might win
Best Guests. This was amazing. Want us to fix the life?

(01:18:25):
They fixed it already on there. The only thing they
need fixed is that it's Joseph's turn to equal things out.
Um uh, you guys, you're amazing guests, and I really,
in all honesty, no joke, I'm so impressed with how
mature you are about this and how you found a
way to make your marriage exciting. And kudos to you
and Joel. Very good guests, finding awesome guests, candid and

(01:18:48):
by the way, nobody gets to see people like we do.
You can tell you guys really love each other. So
it's yeah, it was fun talking to and for the audience.
You should know. Just to make this even more bizarre,
they're both very good looking, right, I mean, these are
these are fine looking people. All right. I thought we
could end today with with Josh Raidens song because it's
in the episode Don't Look Away, which is a great song,

(01:19:08):
and as you all know, we're only allowed to play
songs of our friends like the Charlotte Lawrence and the
Josh Raiding. Um, but Donald, anything you want to say,
you know, uh, it's been it's I thought this was
a great episode, very fighting. Thank you Bill. Yeah, I
want to thank Bill for coming on the show. For sure. Man,
I missed it and I got to see these two.

(01:19:30):
This is awesome. Michelle and Joseph one love Zach. Michelle
Joseph are symbolic that they were here. When I said,
this is like your halfway point and so to me,
you guys, it's come back with you. Look as the
owner and creator of this podcast, who I think they

(01:19:51):
had a great choice in hiring you guys. Originally, when Danel,
Joel and I decided to go with Zack and Donald,
one of the things talked about was going, if we're
going to do this many episodes of this show, right
at the midway point, that's when you juice it up
and add energy and kind of reinvigorate. I felt you
guys doing it today both with these guests, and that
was very savvy to have. I mean to have interrupting

(01:20:13):
Bill when Bill was on that well, I don't know
how we ever returned from guests like these like, we
gotta have something insane story. The guests some insane story. Now,
this has got to be more and more crazy. This
is awesome. Okay, we invite you to send us here
insane story. Yes, if you have an insane story that
can compete with these two, we really want to hear it.

(01:20:34):
All right, Thank you, everybody. Please check out Solos unlike
my three best friends on here and very good. All
you got to watch is the Anne Hathaway episode. It's
thirty minutes long. I'drect and check out the Anne Hathaway
thing of Solos and John Donald because I'm gonna watch.
Is it called Wave or the Wave? You injustice? The Wave?
The Wave? Wave is a feature film with our friend
Donald Fay is on it and my friend just watching it.

(01:20:55):
So it's great, all right. And here is Josh radon
Move Don't Look Away by as Reflection, the Windows Perfection. Look,
can you see things? I can be the graves of

(01:21:16):
the past, moments don't last like you got to vote days,
don't see my way what I want to day? But

(01:21:38):
don't you do love? No one knows true and not
even get you my show that I love like beleft,
don't go anymore? Stars like spawn sun. I'm blind to

(01:22:01):
the only one who knows what to say. Say it today.
It stands like a way break for my life in
the sound a simple blow wand today, don't do my man.

(01:22:38):
No one knows true, not even let you my shot.
Ain't that I'm know I beleft. I don't go more.
You can't see me now, all those games you play.

(01:23:06):
I can't know you. No, I even more day because
I want to tell you. Don't look away if you do,
not me. No one knows truth, not even you. You

(01:23:28):
let your mind shore hate that I've known I happened never.
Don't look away. Don't alay if you do not no
one knowing you, not even you, let you my shot. Half,

(01:23:49):
don't gray, don't alay, do not man. No one knows youth,
not even that, even you, that even you, not even you,

(01:24:11):
not even you.