519: His Story III

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Very old environments. I'm in LA I like your spectacles.
I like these are new what you noticed? They're cute.
You know, it's very popular in the city of Manhattan
to be rocking clear glasses right now. And I said
to myself, I think I could pull it off. So
you got yourself some clear frames. Yeah, I rocked the

(00:22):
clear frames. Are you feeling it? I love it. I'm
out here in Los Angeles, Donald for the Emmy Awards.
I hear, are you nominated? I am nominated Donald um
for a Comedy Director of the Year. I hope you win.
I don't know if I'm gonna win. Joe, Well, you're
very popula I didn't say. I didn't say I know
you're gonna win. I said, I hope. Well, of course

(00:44):
I hope. I and Amanda Clutes and my stepmother, who
are both very big manifests and white boarders. A lot
of the stuff I say to all of you listeners
I got from my stepmother initially, and then Amanda Clutes
is miss Whiteboards. She actually, you know, he's going to
be on Dancing with the Stars and has had Dancing
with the Stars on her whiteboard forever. So I'm just

(01:09):
asking you, Joel, you are a pop culture specialist. Yes,
what are my odds? Pretty good? Because odds are it's
going to go to Ted Lasso. Now, some would say,
sorry to interrupt you, Mike, but some would say, if
there's three directors from the same show, that the vote
could be split. That could happen. But I have a

(01:30):
feeling that he Lasso is really going to dominate the
entire evening. And I don't know. I was trying to
see if there were Vegas bets on these, like the Oscars.
That's a good question. Well, Variety, do you know the
publication variety? I'm familiar the publication Variety said I was

(01:50):
most likely to win. Oh oh, that gives me. Fine.
Here's the thing. I'm very it is no bullshit. I
know everybody says this, but it is freaking exciting for
little oldbe who dreamed of making movies and TV shows
to be one of the people nominated for Comedy Director
of the Year. I'm very, very very honored by that.

(02:11):
Of course, I want to win, but I'm pretty stoked
just to be invited to the party. Dude, this is
how I'm looking at it. Okay, one, yeah, yeah, it's
cool to be invited to the party and everything like that. Yes,
but in my opinion, go ahead, I've only seen the
ted lassos. Your episode by far, out of all of

(02:33):
the two, of the two others besides yours, is the
more important one and the more and the more and
the more creative one, because you're really it's the second episode,
so you're taking what the pilot did and you're taking
what's gonna happen. Okay, So look, it's like the handoff
to the running back boom. Here Zach run with it.

(02:55):
This is the tools I have. What can you add
everything that you everything that you did, you did in that.
Whoever followed also watched your dailies also freaking said okay,
well we're gonna have to add this now. So it's like,
you know what I mean, you kind of have an
edge just because you create help. Look, yes, that's what

(03:19):
I'm trying to say. So you could you give that
coego back in time and could you call just remember
if you do win, If you do win, it's just
like this. If you do win, it's pronounced paison no, no, no, no,
motherfucker faisaison donald fat. I better hear that in a
different out motherfucker. If I don't hear that in the speech,

(03:40):
I'm gonna be so pissed off. Oh my god, it'll
be like when Turk when JD went to Disneyland without Turk. Mean,
it'll hurt my heart, motherfucker. All right, calm down, do
you know, like we all if you're in the arts. Oh,
back to drinking during the podcast. This is a nice
little don't worry, it's only one thirty in the afternoon.
This is a nice little ip a. It's citricy. I've

(04:01):
learned a few things about myself. I learned that I
like my weed citrusy, and I like my beer citrius.
Are you high as well? No, I'm not. I got
a right dude all day. Okay, this is It's like
a Sam Adams at lunch. Remember those commercial Hemmingway boost
as they remember those, Just like you know the Italians
when they make movies, they drink wine at lunch. You're

(04:23):
like them. I love it, unlike anyone out there who's like,
you know what, it's fucking one a clock. I think
I'm gonna have a beer with my burger for lunch.
Very very very British. The English like to to have
a little a beer sometimes at the pub at lunch.

(04:44):
Do you not drink beer anymore? You know? I used
to drink beer a lot. I used to love i
pas and pale als and um I um, I got
off when I kind of gave up gluten. I stopped
drinking beer. Now they do have a real some really
good They would be a brand called Omission has a
great gluten free pale ale um. But I don't really

(05:06):
drink beer anymore because I miss it. Actually, I love
certain beers, but it makes me very bloated and gives
me acid reflux. So I knew that that wasn't the
best for me. That sucks and it makes me burp. Um. Hey, wait,
I want you What did you say right? Oh you're
on your tear about how I should win and how
you want to be thanked. Oh. What I wanted to
say is, you know, if you're a creative person, your

(05:27):
whole life, you've been thinking of, like daydreaming in the shower,
of holding the holding the shampoo bottle, of what you
would say, And um, I never plan it out because
I just think it's that's I don't like when people
get up there and just read a card. So I'm
just trying to think of like you have thirty seconds,
like how would you how would you say all that
you want to say in thirty seconds? It's pretty true.

(05:50):
I love you so much. Everybody else thank you. Imagine Joell,
can you imagine I get up there and go, oh,
my gosh. I want to thank Bill and Jason so much.
This is this is such an honor and the whole
cast and crew. I really want to spend the rest
of the twenty seconds on Donald's phase on better hear
my name? I better hear my name. If you did that,

(06:12):
not only the not only the laughing, not only the laughing,
and from the audience also your fans would go fucking nuts,
Like now, that is a true broke. So you're saying
I should just spend like, skip my parents, skip my team,
just focus on you. I want to spend this evening
talking about a bromance twenty seconds, a romance like no other. Um.

(06:37):
But second, you out there in Hollywood and in the
rest of the world, you could only hope to have
a relationship like my Oh. I should shame the rest
of the community, shame them for not being to our standards.
Don't you think some of our other close friends will
be bummed if I only thank you. No, No, they

(06:57):
won't be No. I think I'll get it. I think
Raid and will get it in Stockholm, I think so
he won't even know. Dude, he hit me up, man,
he hit me up last I guess it was this
morning last night for him, morning for me. And he
was like, I'm in the pub and some dude had

(07:17):
a Stormtrooper ring on and I have the exact Stormtrooper ring,
but mine was given to me by this dude, Richard,
who was the costume guy on kick Ass Too, when
I was in London, and this guy got the guy
that was sitting next to Raid and got his from
a store in London, so they could have got it
at the same store. It was freaking pretty awesome to

(07:38):
want talk to you, to be dressing up your children
for Halloween and such. Yeah, of course, whatever they did
their kids, are they gonna be up their childhood? You
know what I'm saying. Are you gonna dress up alongside them?
I guess it is really my question. You know, my
wife and I have done it to a certain degree. Um,

(08:01):
my kids always crush Halloween, you know what I mean?
Wild or crush is Halloween? What does she want to be?
Has I come up yet or to her it has
You know who she really likes right now is Kamala Harris.
She wrote a letter to Kamala that was so fucking
It was like, Hey, Kamala Harris, my name. I I
just want you to know. I think you're really smart.

(08:21):
I'm smart too. You know I'm smart too. Um jells
holds in her tears in Oh God, am I actually kind?
That's so beautiful? But it was like like she she
she wrote the letter. I can't say it forbade them,
but she wrote a bunch of them. She won't run
to Kamala Harris. She wrote one to a grandmother, to
a g mom to was this a school thing or

(08:43):
just on her own? No, she's just really, she's really
you know, the school that we put our kids in
is really good for them and is teaching them, uh
to express themselves. And she came home she's like, you know,
I'm a writer. You know, my daughter thinks she's a
lot of things. She thinks she's an athlete, she thinks
she is a dancer, she's a singer, and she she's

(09:03):
a writer, you know. But but you know, I am
all for all of that. And the fact that she
came home from school and her teacher has her inspired
and has her wanting to be a writer is really awesome.
And so you teachers out there, look at the difference
you make in a kid's life. Truly, no doubt. All right, Okay,

(09:25):
So I got one other thing that I want to
talk about, speaking of children and stuff like that. Go ahead.
I remember how I was talking about when me and
my wife get together, now it's a party. I didn't
mean like, I don't mean first of all, I don't
mean like we have a bunch of other people in
the room. You mean that Casey is in a phase
where she is meaning you where your libido is occasionally

(09:46):
not you know what I mean, like hould on when
she wants when it's time to when. Look, okay, So
this is what I've learned. Quality, quality and quantity are
two different things. Quality is way better than quantity, all
though I really like quantity. Quality is fire house. Quality

(10:08):
is fire right, And so do you think before you
before you go on, do you think there's anything you've
done to change in such a way that absolutely not,
I'm the worst. I am the worst, like she does
everything when it comes to when it comes dude, It's
like if you had a fucking uh wife, it would

(10:31):
be the same fucking thing. Do you cook, Zach No? Right? Uh?
Do you clean? Zach? No? Okay, right then and there
you and me, well I cook, But right with the
not cleaning part. You and I are exactly alike, exactly alike,
exactly alike. This is an issue with them. Of course

(10:54):
I play with my children. But listen, listen, this is
an issue in relationships. If you don't clean, you are
hate like. This is like if I can I get
up mmmmmm from all the housewives or wives out there
who spend time putting their energy into making their home

(11:14):
spot listen, can I get up mmm? If a motherfucker
don't clean, that motherfucker is an asshole in a lot
of ways. Hello, I'm one of them. I'm just putting
it out there. Okay, So I have done nothing, So
why do you think? What do you what do you?
What do you think has shifted that she's now feeling

(11:35):
you with smidgtioned more and getting a little more naughty.
I don't know what it is, man, Don't suck it up.
I know whatever it is. I'm like, don't fix it,
but I got listen. I'm like, I can't do this
not helping her out with shit stuff much longer, or

(11:55):
I think this wave that sing the shore. Yeah, uh,
it's it's it'll end. Okay, now listen, I'm only in
town till Tuesday. Do you need help with the wirly bird?
Oh my god, dude, the wirly bird. I will wear
my bows back. I will make my I will wear

(12:17):
my bows noise canceling headphones and a sleep mask. What
is the wirly bird? That's the one he talked about
where you with Casey Kiman and said, no, where you
arch like a table? And this is this is this
is something that Scrubs came up with. Um it's mentioned.
Um Sarah, right, Sarah, now that ellis sorry, Elliott, now

(12:38):
that she's in her very sexual phase, tries the worly
watching I was watching Titans, which is a show on
HBO Max. It's a show about all of the superheroes. Uh,
the sidekicks and they become superheroes. Right. They mentioned the

(13:01):
whirlybird on that show. The latest episode they mentioned. Not
only do they mention the Whirlybird sexual way. Probably no,
it isn't a sexual way. This guy is watching two.
This guy is watching two people go at it like
at a peep show, and they say, we'll do the Whirlybird,
but that'll cost you extra, and the girl goes, yeah,

(13:22):
the Whirlybird costs extra. Well, I won't charge you for
my participation in the whirly Bird. So wow, Like Scrubs
was be having some kind of weird like resurges. Maybe
people are starting to reference it more. But the Stephen
Colbert on his show last night mentioned Doctor Acula and
I was like, now, wait a second, that's not your joke. Yes,
the whole doctor Acula bit, but was it Scrubs related

(13:44):
or was he just sort of stealing Dracula Doctor doctor Acula?
And I'm like that Scrubs did it first. Oh that's lame.
I hope he didn't steal that. I hope this is
something that he just came. I don't know if Stephen
Colbert's ever watched Scrubs, but just put it out in
the ether. If you did, dude, that's our ship. Bro. Yeah,

(14:05):
well listen, in this episode, JD invents the go Bro.
He doesn't I wrote that same I wrote the same thing. Alright,
let's get into it. Let's get into a five, six, seven,
eight stories about show we made about a bunch of
doctor nurses stories. So yetta around here, yatoo around here.

(14:40):
I'm not gonna lie to you. I thought we ran
out of comedy. I thought this show was gonna be
I thought this episode was not gonna be funny. When
it started off, I was like, Ah, it's okay. But
by the end of it, I gotta tell you, bro,
I was laughing out loud. All right, But let me
ask you guys something, all right, because I thought this
was a little weird. Now we should mention this is
written by Angela and Thistle, who a very very talented

(15:01):
African American female comedy writer. What did you both as
African Americans think about this whole Cox sort of calling
out Turk on his level of blackness. I thought it
was odd, But maybe I'm wrong. I think that's every like.
I think that's a lot of African American males. Uh,

(15:24):
what's the word I'm looking for. It's not a weakness,
but it's like a worry that they're gonna be treat
that you're not black enough, right, what I mean, So
you're saying it's a real concern. I say it's a
concern for some people. I do believe some people feel like,
you know, um, you know, I'm not I'm not as

(15:46):
connected to the people as I would like to be
to my people as I would like to be, you know,
but at the end of the day, there's no way
anyone can tell you you're not black. It was just,
I know, but wasn't it weird? I mean, it just
felt maybe it was just the maybe it was just
a bit dated, but the idea that I mean, obviously

(16:07):
clearly Cox would never do this today, But it just
felt a little odd that the whole, the whole arc
of you and Cox in this story is him challenging
how black you are. Yeah, but you know what, when
you feel like that, you got to ask yourself, well,
what how much have I get given back to the community?
How much have I, you know, contributed to my people? Yeah,

(16:29):
but I mean in the episode, it's not that I
mean just yeah, it is in a lot of ways.
It is. Turk's whole thing is you know, I'm cool
because I'm black. All the bullshit that you guys have
all the bullshit that white people have, how they've oppressed
black people. God has given us coolness and therefore there's

(16:50):
no way I'm I'm cheese. Dude, your cheese. There's no
way I'm not I'm cheese because I'm black. And well,
what are your thoughts on this? Um for the time period,
it makes a lot of sense if you look at
a white flight where there's a lot of like people
leaving the inner city, right and that becomes like a
black cultural hub them because only black people. I was

(17:12):
raised in the Burbs. I certainly had thoughts like this
of like, where am I black enough? What does that mean?
And and at the end of the day, like coming
out of that decade, though, there was a lot of
people like you just are like, you don't have to
there's how to prove it, there's no you have to clear.
You just get to be black. And that's not so.
I would say yes to your point back, it is dated,
but in that era, it was a very true and

(17:35):
genuine feeling. I remember a kid in my high school
who was very smart and he hung out with all
the white kids and he was um. He would definitely
say that he felt ostracized from some of the other
black kids at the high school. Oh dude, you get
ostracised for being a light skin. And then and and

(17:57):
you know what I mean, like like straight up like
for real man or dark skin, it doesn't matter, man,
It's just prejudice within within our own communities. Man. I
remember my brother. My brother would be like, well, you're adopted,
and I'd be like, why how am I adopted? He's like,
he's like, because look at your skin. You're white, because

(18:18):
because my skin was lighter than his, dude when we
were kids. Men. But the opposite of that is like,
did that guy choose to have any black because there's
like also, you know, I certainly run into black people
who don't want anything to do with other black people,
and that's suspects. That's like what's happening here? And why?
You know? I was looking at my instagram right and
my instagram is me and a bunch of white people.

(18:39):
My wife's white, Zack's white, you know what I mean. Like,
and then and then and then then when I dive
in even deeper, it's like, all right, there are black
men on my page, but the amount of black women
on my page, it's like, my mom, it's like my mom,
and that's pretty much it. I think Taraji's up there.

(19:00):
I got Taragi up there, and then like that covers
a lot of ground, Like it's kind of gets you
a lot of extra like bus Taraji gets you extra points,
of course, but you know what I mean, It's like
when you listen, man, there's no way anyone can ever
question the fact whether I'm black or not. I know
I'm black, you know what I mean, Like kiss my ass, dude,

(19:22):
Like if that if that's your argument, if that's your argument,
well yeah, got white friend and I'm black. Have you
ever had a white person challenge your blackness before? Because
I have, Well that well that it's it's it's just
weird to have that coming from a white person, you
know what I mean? How can you? How? Um? They

(19:45):
basically we're saying that I maybe she's basically like, oh,
well you're not black, And I was like, but both
of my parents are black and I have an afro,
like I just don't know what more unique like I
And then it was weird because then I had I
talk to my friends. I'm like, why is this bothering me?
Because it shouldn't have phased me at all like this
person doesn't know me, Like they certainly don't know anything

(20:06):
about my culture or my history. Um, but I hadn't.
I was I was mad about it. Yeah, you know
what you know, OJ kind of fucked it up when
he said I'm not black, I'm OJ man. He that
kind of fucked up a lot of a lot of
a lot of shit, you know what I mean. It's like, wait,
what did you just say? Dude? It's like, whatever happened

(20:27):
to him? Well? How about this? How about this? He
got black real quick. M It took a minute, but
it did happen. How about that? Um, let's talk about
Optimist Prime the mural. We are very talented painters. I

(20:48):
don't know where j d am mind doing all the worker?
Are you helping? We've we've made a very very beautiful
Optimist Prime mural in the baby's room. I for of all,
If anybody, I just want to put up a little asterix.
If you hear chainsaws. They've decided to take down a
tree next door to me. They started a second we started.

(21:10):
Is it a magical tree? No, it's just right around
the time we hit record. They were like, let's do it, man,
Let's take down the tree. So I apologize, Um, is it?
Is it a green tree? I think it's a dead tree.
I don't think people take down nice trees. Oh okay,
but if you but if you listeners hear chainsaws, it's
my fault. I'm sorry. Um, what were you saying, Optimist Prime. So,

(21:33):
if anybody knows me, you know that I grew up
on the Transformers cartoon. Yeah, g I Joe. Those were
my jams growing up. He man. Also, um, and Saturday,
not Saturday mornings, but after school on Channel eleven w
p i X shout out in New York City. Yeah,
picks picks remember that? Remember pick picks the video game.

(21:55):
Only people who grew up in New York our age
no pick pick picks, picks, picks, picks, picks picks. Um. Anyway,
so Optimist Prime has a you know, a really Uh
it's it. Transformers is a part of my childhood. You know,
who is your favorite transformer growing up? It was See

(22:16):
so cliff Jumper was my favorite transformer growing up. He
was kind of rough. He was kind of like Bumblebee. Uh.
They make him a sucker in all the movies and stuff,
like he gets killed in the movie, but in the cartoon.
He survives in the nineteen eighty six cartoon him Jazz.
Have you've seen every Transformer incarnation. I'm gonna be honest,

(22:37):
some of the Michael Bass well, all of the Michael
Bays stuff. I can't watch anything. It's kind of I
can't do it. I'm sorry, and I'm sorry. I really
find it unwatchable. And there's no disrespect to Michael Bay,
but I think that No, he's clearly a very good filmmaker.
I just don't want to want to watch Metal Fight Metal.
I have no interest in that. Well, you can't even
see the Metal Fight, That's what I'm saying. It's so close.

(22:59):
I just I've said this before. I think it's like
the ultimate example to me of when an action movie's
not working. When I don't even know what the hell's
going on, I can't follow it. Yeah, anyway, So, but
the cartoon, if you watched the cartoon, even to this day,
it still holds up. Not the not the cartoon television
show because that's uh dumbed down version of what the movie,

(23:25):
but the nineteen eighty six cartoon Transformers movie. Well, maybe
if you, if you, if you have kids, show them
in the nineteen eighties. So you can't well you can't
why it's very Violentprian, Oh, it's viry violent and there's
curse words in it. Oh, so it was made for adults. No,
it was made for the kids that grew up on Transformers.

(23:45):
So this is a quick and then I promise you
listeners will get back into scrubs. This is we need
to start scrubs. All I've said is optimist prime. But
so back in the day, Transformers was a big product,
and it had all of these episodes that were on television.
I think it was almost like one hundred episodes at
this point, and they wanted to and it was the

(24:06):
show was made to introduce new toys to the kids.
And so now they have all of these toys and
they're like, we have a whole new line. We're gonna
kill We're gonna we need to erase everything and introduce
this new line. Let's make a movie and do it.
What we're gonna do in the movie, though, is we're
gonna kill off everybody. Everybody that was in the show.

(24:28):
We're gonna kill them off except for you know, a few,
and then we're gonna introduce this new line. They create
the movie. The movie comes out, kids go and see
the movie and cry when Optimus Prime, the leader of
the autobots, is destroyed by Megatron. Cry cry in the theater.

(24:53):
People walk out, don't even finish the movie. It's not
appropriate for kids. So much violence in it, man, so
much violence in it. Now, it's such a fucking awesome
Wasn't there a competitor called Gobots? Still to this day,
I still feel like gobots never got a shot and
they and their transformed their transformation was way more futuristic

(25:17):
like cop tour and uh, what was it? Cyclone? Was
a cyclone or something like that, where he was a
cycle Enough fun transforming robots. Why am I putting the
crib together? You guys are cuddling in bed, and I
because you've got nowhere else to go. I'm got nowhere
else to go. Um. It is funny though, when when

(25:39):
when you hear me on the baby monitor and you're
and you and she's like you go this time, like
I'm the baby. So JD invented the gobro He straps
a camera to a helmet, Yes, to work so he
can watch what what is now? What is the reason
for him? No, he's making it for his mom. Um. Right,

(26:00):
we've never seen Jade's mom ever. No, for some reason, Um,
he's gonna make a video journal for his mom of
what a day in his life is like. Yes, um,
it doesn't last long. We see Kelso stealing ice cream
from the cafeteria, we see uh everyone. H Cox grabs

(26:23):
the camera and says, Um, I'm gonna be I'm gonna
tell your mom that I'm mad at her Uterus for
making you when he goes bad Uterus, bad Uterus, and
then I go she just had up his direct to
me last month. But I'm sure I could edit that
part out. Can I say one thing? I never realized
how much Lonnie was on the show. Also, holy cow

(26:44):
and Linnie. Lonnie's supposed to be a really good basketball
player all of a sudden, that's all bullshit and we'll
get to that when we get all right. But anyway,
the janitor kidnaps me and puts me in the water
tank on the roof, right where I could die. Let's
be honest, Yes I could drown. Yes, Um, this was
an excuse to have the janitor me. I don't know

(27:09):
why I'm out of it. Might be you know, a
k one time Bill was like, I was so fried,
I think, and Bill was like, we're gonna write one
where you're barely in it, um, so you can just
And then clearly I think it may have been because
he was kind of like, we're gonna give you some
days off just to like catch up on rest where
you're not in an episode at all. I'm not, I

(27:30):
mean the fucking water tank about to die. Yeah, it's interesting,
you know, it would have been it would have been
a very cool show to watch. Also if Neil was
the voiceover. The theme of the show is feeling like
you're not you know, uh necessary in yeah, or making
any difference or making any difference in the in the world,

(27:52):
right and they you know the janitor and when I
when you think about it, like the janitor on Scrubs
is a height It's a heightened character because I can't
sit here and say I know that many janitors when
I go to work or when I go when I

(28:12):
was going to school or anything. So it's like, you know,
this character that we're following, even as the ensemble is
it's kind of heightened because we never really get to
know this character in real life, you know, right well,
And also he's a he's a liar, he's a pathological liar.
Well we learned that. We learned that, well, we know

(28:32):
that through five seasons. But in this episode, when you're
finally in his head, he just talks about how much
he loves liar. Yeah, he just fucks with He just
can't tell the truth, right, which really sets up the
fact that so much of the shit he says isn't true.
But then sometimes we see it, like like we see
his squirrel army, like we see the fact that he

(28:54):
makes um that he turned all his tools into eating
things like the drill fork, and we see and we
also find out that he really does want to make
a difference at the place he works, you know what
I mean, Yes, and he and and and in his
mind even just holding the dude's legs down that was
so big for him that he had to tell everybody.

(29:16):
Oh yeah, Neil crushed this episode. But yeah, we should
have of course mentioned the us that Neil Flynn is
just so funny and he should have his own show.
I mean, I know, even in the middle, he was
you know, supporting. I guess, I don't I guess he
was a lead. I don't I don't know, but I
think someone needs to build. I think Neil is developing
a show, uh for for himself to be the lead,

(29:39):
but he should be the leader, but he should be
the lead of entertaining. Yeah, he's he's really good man,
and he's got great comedic timing, better timing, and no
one has better improv skills. And he also brings the
drama at the end of this, I got goosebumps when
at the last beat that we'll get to. Yeah, well,
that's another thing I was going to say, because this
whole episode, it doesn't necessarily you don't see that. I

(30:02):
didn't see that one coming. I didn't see that emotion
at the end coming because you never get emotion from him. Really,
it's just a it's only a smidget of a second
in the whole show, Like in the whole if you
were to look at the whole show, it literally is
a fraction of what the show is. But you still

(30:23):
at the end, you still like, you know, heartbreaking, Yeah,
you know it's a heartbreaking, and we'll just talk about
it now, even though it's the end. Is that he
doesn't even hear the thank you. No, that's what give
me goosebumps all over my body? Is that he still
he still ends the episode in the day not feeling
appreciated at all, when when all the guy wanted to
say the second is computer was up, was thank you.

(30:45):
Yeah it's still moving. Huh. Yeah, So the gentleman has
locked in syndrome. Which there's an amazing movie by the
way about this. What is large, Joel? What was that
movie where the locked in syndrome is your brain is
fully fine, but you can't move at all. And people
can move a cursor. Some people can move a cursor

(31:07):
with their eyes. So he's able to move the cursor
with his eye. Movement attracts his eye movement and so
he can type out or click on words and the
computer will speak for him. Um, there's an incredible movie
made by Julian Schnabel. But what if you can't spell?
If you can't spell, I bet, I bet they would

(31:30):
have just like pages of most common words. Sorry. The
Diving Bell in the Butterfly is an amazing film. I
highly recommend you all, and and I believe it's a
true story, Joel, will you double check? Yeah? Based off
the nineteen nine seven memoir of Jean Dominique. Do you
know this story? It all though? I don't, all right,
and just a short version. It's like the man has

(31:51):
the true story locked in syndrome. And this is before
a fancy computer eye tracking technology, and the only thing
he could do was blink one eye, and he would
have an aid hold up letters and wait for him
to blink, so she would be like a B C.
He'd blink, Okay, it's the letter C. And he learned

(32:12):
to communicate that way. His brain was fully one, but
he could. Um. I think that they learned shorthand to
do it. Um. I don't know, I don't, I don't know.
Watch the movie, it's incredible, Julian Schomblement. But he eventually
wrote a book like that. Wow, he blinked out a

(32:34):
book that's his story. Amazing bestseller obviously. I mean, the
movie is amazing. If you're listening to this, watch The
Diving Belt and the Butterflies. He's died ten days after
the book's publication. Wow. Wow. But but what's incredible is
what's so scary is that people don't know. People assume

(32:55):
his brain dead. Right, He can't move, he can't movie,
he can't communicate, he can can't say no, please, no,
no no. Does he do you feel pain? I don't
remember the specifics, but he's one hundred your brain, his
brain is one hundred. They call it locked insidram because
your brain is his brain was one hundred percent. He
just couldn't communicate at all. Oh that's fucking Then you
feel Then you definitely feel pain. If that's the case,

(33:17):
I don't remember. I don't remember. I'm sure all cases
are different. I don't remember. In his particular case, if
he felt pain, that would be the worst to be. Yeah,
it's a nightmare. Though. It's a nightmare. But that's what's
so cool about the story is that they finally figured
out a nurse I believe was like all he could
do is blink, and they like figured out. So this
gentleman in the in our story, Um, it's it's it's

(33:38):
you know, it's it's a more current day. It's the
two thousands. And he can move a cursor around by
that it tracking his eyes. Um, the janitor has the
voice over and he calls you black Kojack and scary
nurse wife. Yes, and now he realizes that he can
get past anyone with kindness. So we're compliments, right right,

(34:02):
you know, with kindness compliments. Yeah, so he says something
nice about Carla and then he moves on to Kelso
and he's almost free from having to explain where he
was because he wasn't at work, because he has placed
you in the water tower. He's placed JD and water
tower and he's almost free. And Turk asks, hey, where's JD.

(34:31):
I don't know what does he say? I don't know.
I think he went I don't remember. Oh, you know,
but you do the Carlton dance? Yes, now I've never
seen you do the Carlton or you know. I know
Alfonso Rivera is credited for making this dance very famous.
But wasn't it the dance that Courtney Cox did in

(34:52):
the Bruce Springsteen video when she's Molly that's what Molly
Ringwalld did intends And the breakfast Club it's just kind
of I was sorry, that's what I mean. Breakfast club. Yeah,
it's what all white people. Oh, it's the white people dance. Yes,
Eddie Murphy. Eddie Murphy makes it famous enough. Eddie Murphy
makes it famous. And I think, doesn't he make it

(35:13):
famous in Raw? Doesn't he make it famous in raw
with the white ras. That's Deli delirious is red but
the white man's over bit and he does he even
does He's like, y'all got this dance. He even does
the ship all right. Well, Alfonso made it famous, but

(35:36):
uh but I remember Courtney Cox doing it, and that
Bruce Springsteen early early, one of the first music videos
was Bruce Bree Started Fire. It wasn't even a video,
it was just a concert video where he pulls Courtney Cox,
not yet famous Courtney Cox up on stage. Yeah, my Beard,
I say, is definitely the pharmacist. It's taken five seasons

(36:00):
for me to prove it. He at five oh two
if you're following this uh um investigation along with me,
at five minutes and two seconds in, Beard Say is
standing inside the pharmacist window and and working. He's the pharmacist, okay,
or he could just be no checking to see no,

(36:21):
because other times we've researched this, he's been but he's
just he's been in that room before. But bro, he's
mingling back there. This time. He's at the desk. He's
the pharmacist. He's obviously not a very good pharmacist because
he's always wandering around the hospital sometimes he's sometimes in

(36:44):
the ICU. Dude, Yeah, because the pharmacists doing and I know,
I guess too, I guess I don't know. We need
a doctor to answer. Why would the pharmacists be wandering
all over the hospital. Yeah, we're gonna have the pharmacists
come talk to you for a second. Like it doesn't
sound right, doesn't And also like why none of the

(37:06):
prescriptions being filled because the pharmacists is wandering around the
fucking hospital, Like, dude, get in your fucking booth and
fill these prescriptions. Isn't the pharmacists like such is the
pharmacist is something that needs to be disrupted. It's never
a good experience. Do you find that. Have you ever
had an easy nothing was wrong? Everything was quick and

(37:30):
easy at the pharmacy. Now, I just hate when it's
judgmental when like you, they're like, you don't need these pills.
They're when they're handing you the pills and they're like
when they're handing you the pills and they've got that
face like that's when it's like, fuck you, dude, what

(37:53):
are you getting where you're getting judgment? You don't don't
worry about what I'm no. I'm just saying you no,
there's all these things that are disrupting everything. Like on
my street in New York, there's on in my whole area.
There's several different companies that are doing this with the dentist,
because who likes when the dentist it's like the worst experience.
We all know, it's just like weird. They're like now

(38:13):
they're making them like almost like a retail storefront that
looks beautiful and like a new take on the dentist,
and you know, you can make an appointment with the
app And I'm involved in this new company called Modern
Animal that's doing that with the vet. Um. They're saying like, okay,
the vet's just always a hassle. It's like you can
never get in. It smells. It's not that's like old
school building. This is like again retail storefront. You're you're

(38:37):
a member of the club. You can make an appointment
on your app um. Anyway, my point is someone should
do that for the pharmacy because I just think, I
don't know, every time I go to the pharmacy to
get something, it's it's always they're like what they can't
find it, and like they did your doctor call it in?
Yeah he called it and yeah I didn't know I
valtreks for phased on valtracks for phase on. That would

(39:03):
be the worst day of my life ever. I would
be like, what are you doing, mister phase on paging?
Mister phase on? Your valtrek is ready at the pharmacy.
Count I just want It's not I swear the wrong
face on. You must have the wrong pa. There's another
face on here. No, the African Ammerican phase because you're

(39:33):
not coming, because you're hiding out in the magazine aisle.
And she's like, oh, let me get more clear the
African American bearded phase on black guy from Scrubs face.
Five minutes later, she's like, black guy from Scrubs, Your
Valtrex is ready, and did you want the what did

(39:57):
you want the eighty milligram viag because we only have sixty?
Please come to the desk. Would you claim the viagra?
Would you be be well the biagra? Yes, it's mine, I think. Um,
I'll leave that there. Um. What about the janitor riding

(40:19):
a vacuum flying vacuum? That looked good, So we learned
at the viagra The janitor has several inventions in his
in his mind is the straw. That's and also there's
the if something were the spill on let's say the

(40:41):
third floor of the hospital and he was on the
first floor, I need to get there quickly. He has
a vacuum cleaner slash hub crop. It's called the hover hoover, right, yeah,
the hover hoover. And then and then don't you think
for scrubs, for scrubs visual effects which I always think

(41:02):
are cringed. That looked pretty good. It did look good.
I was waiting for him to fly in. He's like
open a window. That would be cool if you flew in.
H did that? We didn't have that kind of budget.
It looked good though. How about Date night with mister Roberts. Uh? So,
Laverne likes to prime the pump by watching the young
men sweat on the basketball. Yes, like up and before

(41:26):
we get to the basketball game. Not only did she
like to get worked up, they roll play in in
in in in actual environment. Yes, she waits at the
bus stop like she's gonna go to the bus stop
and pretend to be a working girl. H yeah, a
lady of the night. Yeah, so god, that could go wrong.

(41:48):
I was I was waiting for the punchline, like they
got arrested and needed to get bailed out. Because isn't
it funny on the live show that when when m
Aloma revealed she only read her scenes, and so when
we were talking about because I don't think LaVerne's above
ground about no, I don't know if I don't even

(42:11):
know if Alona has ever seen the show, because when
we asked her about the above ground food party, I
guess it was it was never discussed and with her characters,
so she's like, what are he's talking about? She she's
never She has no fucking idea, no idea, She has
no idea what the show Scrubs is about. What do
you think the odds are that? What do you think
the odds are that? Other than the pilot? Maybe Alma

(42:32):
watched this single episode. Okay, so this is gonna come on,
This is gonna come on before the show. Well, this
is episode nineteen and so the very next episode, listeners,
who didn't watch the live show, here is the live
show yet? Oh well you're gonna watch. You're gonna hear
the audio from the live show next, listeners, and you'll

(42:53):
hear that Alma um doesn't have any idea about the
above groundpool party because she reveals that she only read
her scenes in the script. She was so sassy. Huh, Yeah,
she was as sassy as her character. Yeah, she was great.
She was one. It was just one, you know. I
really it would be nice to do. And I'm not

(43:15):
gonna say this is gonna happen or anything, but it
would be nice in some way or another to do
another reincarnation of this show, even if it's animated. I
really feel like animated is a great way to you know,
because it feels like Season five feels like The Simpsons

(43:36):
and or Family Guy and or Future Rama and you
know what I mean. It's just like it's so out
there and these characters could get away with so much. Okay,
we'll be right back. Don't go wait where are you going?
We'll be right back. And we're back. And we're back

(43:57):
and we're back up back that thing up, We're back,
We're back. I don't have my sound effects machine. I
didn't bring it from New York City. So everyone who
doesn't like the sound effect, you're getting a break. You're
getting a break if you don't like that's the thunderous
applause of everybody, and we should say, since the next
episode is the live show, you're really gonna like him.

(44:18):
It's special. I was thinking we should do an episode
with just the ladies, that is to say, Chris, Judy, Sarah.
Maybe a holiday themed episode. I don't know about a
live show. I just mean like a like a episode.
Oh hell yeah, I'm also about that life. Okay. Um.

(44:41):
Now has Joanny tor been said before? Because the janitor
introduces himself as doctor Joanny Tour But I don't know
if it's the first time we're hearing that. I think
it's the second, but I could be wrong. I laughed
out loud when he's holding down the legs and he
says this is easy, just like drowning. Yes, yes, yes.

(45:01):
And then when a valid he goes, I didn't see
the demon leave the body? Yes, yes, yes, and this
and and and and and this this right here sends
the janitor because Carlos says, great work, Janitor sends him
on a freaking crusade through the hospital to tell everyone

(45:28):
how useful he was. Yes, he held the legs down
at his moment, the moment they needed him. People who
have no idea who he is, and then our who
is Judy's standing, who we've discussed before as a line
when she says something about, oh, he won't stop talking
about his bragging. And then the guy who's is he

(45:51):
the dermatologist? That guy, No, that wasn't the dermatologist. That's
just some random that was no, no, no, no, I
think it's the guy who plays the dermatologist. If it
was Joelli, Joel will find it out. But any call
back because he was called the most useless person in
the hospital. Oh that's interesting, that's a deep cut. Oh
but anyway, he says, imagine how it feels coming here

(46:12):
and knowing you don't make a difference, And the janitor
overhears that, and we go to break. That's our commercial break.
But then we come back and he's like, yeah, I know,
I know they don't think that way about me. Of
course I'm important. Of course. Well, he sees an opportunity
because he at least finds something he can do, which

(46:33):
is keep them the man with locked in Syndrome company
because the guy can't communicate because his computer has been broken.
He tries to fix his computer and really fucks it
up and avoids the warrant warrant and everything. Yeah. Yeah,
and he introduces drill fork. You can you can drill
and fork, but mostly fork. Okay. Can we talk about

(46:53):
this basketball game and why it's bullshit? Yes, let's talk
about the bullshit basketball Okay. So Lonnie could play basketball
for any fucking school. It is well known that Turk
is a very good athlete. Yes, Why why in this
episode were you and Todd such bad basketball players? I
have no idea. And the way we would beat Lonnie

(47:15):
and doctor Cox is whoever Cox is guarding? You just
play through that person and you just that's how you
beat him. And so it was bullshit. You know. Now
I have a question, did you it feels like you
were triggered a bit um? Did you not like even
your character being beaten at basketball? Not? That's bullshit. It's
not my Lonnie, dude. I played with Mike Holbert before,

(47:40):
oh and Jim and Mike cats Well, I mean, not
enough to fucking dunk on me. He ain't dunking on
me ever, not even in his bed, not even in
his heyday. I could dunk in my heyday, not even
in his hey day. I don't think Mike Hulbert's Michaelbert
is very good. He's a very good basketball player. Him

(48:01):
and his brother are don't get twisted. They're all playing
that Bill Lawrence game. And I don't care what you say.
If anybody has ever played in that game, they know
it's not only a tough game to playing, but it's
a very very rough, rough game to play, and so
you can't be no sucker. So they're good. Joela is
saying that Robert Beckwith is the actor's name, and he
played doctor Johnson here and in My Brother's Keeper. See

(48:24):
if you can assess if if he's the dermatologist. I
think he is. I don't think he is the dermatologist
has been dermatologist has been in more than two episodes,
is all. I'm gonna bet you a a rolled jazz
cabbage cigarette. I got some pretty strong shit. You sure
you want to do that? Yeah, I'm gonna bet you one.

(48:47):
Marky Post who just passed away. Um sadly, but she
is back to play Sarah's very inappropriate mother and is
very funny. She's very funny. She gives Keith kiss. She
says she had a C section, so she's all good
down here. Yeah, she said that she's all her kids
have been c sections, so everything has remained the same

(49:09):
down there. Yeah. Do you think there's women that do
that on purpose? If that's the reason, God, yes, I
absolutely are women. And if that's the reason, thank you. Joel.
Are you allowed to Are you allowed to request a
c section because you want to keep your Especially wealthy

(49:31):
women will schedule there because they want to because they
want to keep I just want to be clear, for
both reasons. For both reasons, because someone so that a
male can enjoy it, No, so that there's not any change.
That's the only thing. That's the reason. Hold on. That's
the reason why the character Elliott's mom says it too. Right, listen,

(49:54):
I've done it so that when you when we do it,
you feel it. It's gonna be so fucking good for you.
That's what she's saying. Yeah, right, Joel's saying that a
lot of women do this for that reason. Is that
what you're saying. I'm not saying a lot of women
do it for that reason, but there are certainly there
are women who a do schedules c sections without necessarily

(50:16):
needing one, and be some do it because they want
their vagina to stay tight, you know, that's what they're about,
the scheduling purposes. Wait, first of all, I didn't know
you're allowed to schedule a C section, but Donald, look
in the chat what Joel just wrote? Okay, so I
owe you a Rolls Jazz cabbage cigarette. Do you want

(50:38):
it tonight? Yeah? I want you to bring it over
yourself and try it with me. No, I can't. We
can't do that. COVID man, you just got in town.
Oh all right, well I've been tested. Actually, have you
going to the Emmys? I don't know if you've known this,
but I'm going to the Emmys. Oh my god, I
heard you. Are you nominated? I am? Um? There are
several of us. All right, so o, marky post very funny.

(51:03):
Oh my god. By the way, not one no insult
to Key and Peel, but you did this joke first.
This is the hilarious Key I told Joe what's up dog?
That was hilarious. That guy sold the shit out of
that joke, the old white man, what's up dog? Yeah?

(51:24):
But what we're talking about, if you're lost, is there's
an amazing Key and Peel sketch where um Obama Jordan
Peel is playing Obama and how he greets white people
differently than black people, and it is so funny if
you YouTube, and I'm sure, but um, it's basically this
joke that that old white man is walking down talking
to the white people one way, and then he sees

(51:45):
Donald and he's like, what's up dog? All right, I'm
gonna say this, and I can say it because Shay
Serrano said it. Turk and Carla the cutest couple and
TV has three period. I don't give a fuck what
anybody says. Man, you can say whatever you want to say.
But the two of them are so cute together, especially

(52:09):
when you know she's comforting him because he feels, you
know that you know, maybe doctor Cox was you know,
in some ways right, and she's like, hell, no, he's wrong,
and you know, he's like, I just, you know, want
to be able to do things when we're married. And

(52:29):
she's like, of course we're gonna do things from Mary.
We'll still be able to go out and we're gonna
go and and go to movies and eat dinner. He's
like really, and she's like, noo, we're gonna have kids.
Don't be stupid. He's like, she's like, but don't worry
about it. Man, It'll be great because we'll still be
able to have lots of sex. And he's like really,

(52:49):
She's like, no, it's your life, dude. I wish Casey
was here right now because the theme song would be
playing right. I even asked her. I was like, do
you want to come on and talk about this today?
And she was like, no, no, we don't have to
talk about it. It's real talk. Man. It's like, I'm
sure everything like I was saying, it's like I said

(53:12):
in the beginning, as you get older, like I still
would love quantity. It's a lot of Quantity is a
lot of fun to me when it comes to sex
with my wife. A quality you can't beat that with
a baseball bat. And that's what those two you know
what I mean. And that's what those two have. Man.
They have freaking something really special. And when they have

(53:32):
these moments like this and the Scrubs shows, it feels
so good and yeah, well it's a testament to you
and Judy. I mean, I got to say you your
chemistry all these years is was so strong. And you know,
if you're not in the business, you might think you
can fake that, but you can't really fake that you can.
Obviously two actors can pretend to like each other. But

(53:56):
there's something about when when chemistry happens like it like
it did between Donald and Judy, that it really it resonates.
People feel it. And I think Judy has this going
for her as well. I think all of us do.
And I think maybe it's because we're character actors on
this show, but we're very lucky because when we work

(54:16):
with other people, we can find a way to have
that chemistry. And that's I think that's what makes really
good character actors, you know what I mean? Like a
character actor is somebody who can come into a scene
and do a scene with someone and the chemistry is
is good and it works that you believe the relationship.

(54:39):
In my opinion, I think that's a that's what you
know is you know, strong something for a character. I
think all of us on the show Scrubs have this
ability to to form a chemistry with whoever we're working with. Well, no,
but I disagree with you that that in this case.
Of course, that's that's what happen, and that's one of

(55:00):
the reasons it went nine years, the chemistry between all
of us. But that doesn't always work for all of us.
In our other endeavors, you sometimes have to pretend that
you really like someone or pretend that you don't want to.
But that doesn't mean you don't have chemistry. For me,
I I equate chemistry with like, I feel so comfortable

(55:21):
with this person and I can totally be free to
perform and not be in my head and not think, oh,
this person's a jerk. That's what I That's what I
equated too, is like, I like them and I love
what they're doing, and they respect me, and they like
what I'm doing, and we just we click, you know.
But then there's it's a relationship obviously, But then there's

(55:43):
the flip side of it and the directors who like
it where the set is kind of chaotic and people
are at odds and hands with each other. Right, you
hate it, but sometimes that makes for great chemistry. I
once was doing a play with someone who was so
possible and U and he said, I I like tension

(56:06):
in the rehearsal room. He said, oh, he said it
was good for he thought it was good for the play.
And I just remember thinking, like, I hate tension. I
want to create a safe space on my sets when
I'm the boss. I create a place like we had
on Scrubs where there's no wrong answer and be free.

(56:27):
And this is and this is, this is a kind
environment for you to be creative. I don't I don't
want anyone feeling on edge and uncomfortable. That's not my style.
So we learned. We learned that Carla, you know, Elliot,
finally has the epiphany she needed to have, that that
Carlo was the one who who helped her become the

(56:47):
great doctor that she is, and Carlo was the one
who saved her ass a hundred times. Well, we should
go back and explain Elliot's storyline in this whole episode,
is that, you know, she'd feel she needs to be
a little bit tougher on her interns because she gets
chewed out in the beginning by Kelso if I'm correct

(57:08):
in saying that your interns mess ups are your responsibility.
So she wants her interns to be the best that
they can be so that she doesn't have to, you know,
feel the brunt on her end. Yes, and one of
her interns because she puts a smiling face after one
of the dosages, it causes the seizure that the janitor

(57:28):
helps with and he believes is an exorcism. I think
that's my favorite. I didn't see, didn't I didn't see
the v outon leave the body. That's the Funnies episode.

(57:53):
And as I said in the end, you know, well
I laughed, Well, I laughed it. Also, this is easy,
like it's a lot like drowning. Someone made me laugh too. Yeah. Well,
if this is the one, I'm right after the other. Yeah. Um.
And then it's very moving, as we said earlier in
the end, when when Cox, you know, it's all proud
of himself because he's the top dog, top alpha doctor

(58:16):
in the hospital, and he opens the computer and and
the man's able to communicate the word thank you, and
Cox is like, oh, you're welcome, and he says, no,
I meant I didn't mean you. I meant him. And
I thought it was such a great choice of Bills
and end or John Inwood, our cinematographer who shot this.
Although I don't think it would have been left to

(58:37):
the director. I'd sure this is a bill decision that
the janitor never hears it, which I just thought was
so such a such a moving choice. Yeah, but he
still made a difference, and he knows. I know, I know,
but he no, he doesn't know yet in a lot
of ways he knows. He did he know me what
to me? What was moving about? It? Is? He never

(58:57):
he never heard it. He doesn't his his ego won't
allow him to not. No, No, I disagree. Okay, Well, hey,
it still was an emotional I've been We've been wrong before.
If I've been wrong, several times, I've been wrong. This
is the third time since I've learned that. You're weell,

(59:18):
do we have a guest today? To all right, We're
gonna sear a quick break on the right back with
a very fun get where are you going? No, I'm
right back and we're all right, Joell, we don't have
Daniel Donald. What do you think the odds are that

(59:39):
Juell will successfully record this guest? Told you I'm not
messing this up? Well't you? Well? You remember what happened
last time Daniel left the recording of the guests to you.
It was horrible and hard, but I learned poor guests
tend to go back to their family, probably collapsed in
the fetal position, crying that they don't break my heart
like this. They d m me and they were like

(01:00:01):
you know, Um, I'm hurting inside. This pain won't go away.
I got a DM from them too, telling me is
if you know Joel some rectifies. Yes, I got someone
saying that they had finally beaten oxycotton and sign and
when Joel sent them right back into it. Oh my god. Okay,

(01:00:26):
that's right, it's fine, Joel. Accidents happened, like not hitting
the record button. I hit record, I just didn't tell
you know what. Listen, who do we got? Who do
we got a right? We don't want to hear it.
We don't let to hear it. Who is it? Who
has it? Got a collar? Talks? You know, like a
bottle maybe talking about the episode. So come on, Joell

(01:00:55):
a will and Man, Hi, guys, hey guys, the program.
We're so happy to have you. You You guys are some
we are Were you honor me? I don't. I don't
have my sound pad, otherwise I'd be hitting you honor me?
But maybe Dan Ladden and post I don't Dan Tank forever? Yeah, yeah,

(01:01:19):
why don't we just do them live? We'll do it live,
Will Tank forever, woll Tank forever. You honor me, You
honor me, you you honor me tang forever, Zach. I
love you, Zach, I love you for say quick talking
about Jo Willies. Yeah, well, for folk's sake, please stop
talking about Jo Willies. O Ye, you're getting you guys
are getting them live. That's the clap sound lamar. Well,

(01:01:48):
and Derek, can you tell the guys what did you
do and why you rode into be on the show? Um? Yeah?
Will do you want to start us off? For you? Mean?
So I'll start us off, Derek, and you're going to
so uh? Zack and Donald? If do you know how
you started a podcast to talk about the show that
you were on and you go back and you rewatch

(01:02:09):
episodes of the show and talk about it. Yeah, I
know about that. So yeah, so well, what we came
up with was rewatching episodes of your podcasting it, oh
my gosh, using it as a shameless plug to try
and get Joel to let us on take Doctors Real friends.
All right, now, does anyone listen to your podcast? We

(01:02:32):
are actually in a lot more countries than you should
have expected. Yes, we have tens of listeners, Zach. We
are very proud of our tightening it. But I'm seriously,
do you do you how many listeners. Do you think
listen to your rewatch podcast of the podcast of the
Rewatches officially called the Past you kind of stolen idea

(01:02:55):
because we were running out of ideas what to do next,
and we're like, why don't we why don't we re
listen to the podcast. So I am I'm going to
throw this out here in Zach. Our first episode was
published February third of this year. Oh, when you have
eighteen plays? We have eighteen plays of the poet? Yeah,
well we should give you We should give you a
plug since how do people took called? Our show is

(01:03:16):
called the Rewatch Podcast Rewatch Podcast and you can find
us on Twitter at RPRP Official. Okay, so there you go.
I think where Joel really started to see us because
we started live tweeting your live shows and the first one,
the first one was a lot more low key, but
we really laid into it. On the second one we

(01:03:38):
got a lot more engagement. Even Christa Miller retweeted, now,
are you guys here? What did you say about us?
Are you guys hard on us? Is there criticism? Because
Donald and I don't hand criticism very well. Oh no,
we love you guys. No, I can tell if you
would do a rewatch of a podcast rewatch. You're probably fans,
but are you guys like is there your critiques? Or

(01:03:59):
you're like, gosh, they really barely talked about scrubs this episode.
We we have, uh, you know, we have some segments. Um,
we we have the Donald phase on, you know what
I mean. Counter. Um, we actually invited a guest who
was on your podcast to our podcast and talk about her.
This is meta. Did she get on? Did she come on?

(01:04:19):
She did? She did? Came on? Was there a great episode?
Get anybody listening to this podcast wanted to get on board?
Got it? Yeah? Dang it? Now you should. That's talking
about That's what I'm taking. I'm a little worried talking
about that. That that that that that That's what I'm
talking about. Woo Tang forever, Woo Tang forever, Woo Tang forever,

(01:04:41):
Zach I love you. Now listen, guys, I'm a little
worried that you're gonna have some of our guests on
again before we have a chance to have them on. Yeah,
you can't second bring back the sex. Stay away from
that sex, that sex couple, that that cuckold couple. There
are all right, but if this who was going to
continue where we weren't getting onto fake doctor's real friends.

(01:05:04):
We were going to try everything in our power to
try and get Ryan Reynolds on before you Oh my God. Also,
we also considered considered so there's a there's like a
Scrubs like Discord and a reddit. We considered going on
to the reddit and being like, is anyone's legal given
Christian name Ryan Reynolds? You come on the podcast so
we can say, hey, Joel, we got Ryan Reynolds on

(01:05:26):
our podcast. Well, I can't believe you took so long
to let these gentlemen come on the show. They've dedicated
their lines to the Cuddy on the show. I like
to build up a little. Yeah, there's a lot of
build up. This might be my new favorite podcast. And
I don't podcast. I don't think Donald's ever listened to

(01:05:48):
another podcast besides this one. This might be my new
favorite podcast. I mean, well, the I was gonna say,
will do you do you want to tell them the
Star Wars thing? We did, Wait, hold on, you did
a Star Wars podcast on our reach, So we made
again in our quest to get Joel to notice us
on Oh my God. Joel, these guys video on Twitter

(01:06:11):
of it's it's the Star Wars opening, but the crawl
is just like it's like episode seven, Joel, Can we
be guests on Fake Doctor? And then it's a whole
like field up about like two Scrubs fans, Derek and
Will trying to beat the existent lad of a pandemic.
Joel was picking a Star Wars Wars. Well, where's your camera?
By the way, what's coming on our Star Wars podcast? Joel?

(01:06:32):
Why are you not showing your face to these men?
Are you shame because you made them? No, not at
all a little unstable, and I just want to make
sure everything keeps going so camera, I know, but these
men might want to see your face since you really
made them struggle. If there she is the woman who
tortured you guys. When is our Star Wars podcast coming out? Yeah?

(01:06:55):
What's happening you guys? You guys will be taking a
break and then my hope is that you will have time.
I am now that you know, Zach will be off
doing his thing. You and I can do our thing.
So oh so you have to let let me explain
to the audience who might be not who might be confused.
I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna do the sound. I
don't want you to, Okay. Joelle and Donald are going

(01:07:22):
to do a new podcast called The Black Side and
it's all things Star Wars from the perspective of two
African American people who are obsessed with Star Wars. Does
that correct your wells at the pitch? Okay? Can you
stop that fucking song now? Um? Do you just think

(01:07:45):
of that in your sleep? Don't you? You just sit
there like dude? All right? Um, we are young? Oh shit?
What they're young? Because he went and that I was
I was doing the original. Oh shit? All right? So

(01:08:10):
I take it that you guys are both mega Star
Wars fans as well. I have been described as a
colossal nerd. So yes, I am a Star Wars Okay,
So I take it you'll be tuning into the Black
Side when when think comes. Yes, I have a question,
and what was your favorite episode there? Young Will episode
of the podcast episode of Star Wars were singing star

(01:08:34):
He's only He's only Star Wars. About your episode your
favorite episode on the podcast that I want to know
about your favorite episode of Star Wars Empire hands down?
Really and you're a young man too. How old you
can I ask? I'm thirty three, thirty three and Empire
hands down, Joel, what's your favorite episode of U of

(01:08:57):
Star Wars episodes through nine, It's definitely Empire, followed closely
by episode seven. Um, sorry, I Force Awakens. I was like,
oh really, t LJ last Jedi eight? Yeah? Yeah, you
see how you see? I want to know do you
want to know mine? Or do you want nobody gives

(01:09:18):
a fuck what your friends. I don't like that. I
don't like the podcast isn't called the Zach Side. Zach.
I love Zach, I love me. So you don't even
need the soundboard anymore. It's better if I just live.

(01:09:38):
Everybody knows exactly what you're doing now so much, dude.
And by the way, I still haven't labeled the thing,
and I have to guess every time anyway. So this way,
this way, I know I'm always going to get what
I want. It's like jazz with a soundboard. That's what
makes it crazy. I know, it's like I'm scatting. Um.

(01:10:01):
Why nobody listening to your podcast? Guy? Um? All right,
so you guys only had eighteen listens on the on
your pilot. I don't think that's very good. We need
to get those numbers up. No, it's not. Well. Originally, Zach,
so we we found your We we've always been fans
of Scrubs, and it was right during like the Lockdowns

(01:10:24):
that Your Guys episode came out, and you know, Derek
and I were just like, you know, we were just
talking back and forth about how like for a while
it was one of like the best things about life
during panos, like every week we had this podcast and
we can watch Scrubs. We can do this. So then
like that just turned in that just morphed into like
we're talking about the pocket, we're talking about fake ackers anyway,
Like let's just record it and we can like we

(01:10:45):
could start doing this to get Joel's intention. You should
go into the face. I don't look at it because
I again, I don't want to read anyone saying that
we suck. But I know that there's a Facebook group
that discusses the podcast. What platform are ye? Yeah, so
we're on Anchor, you guys on iHeart too. Maybe maybe
one day you may need a few more than eight lists.

(01:11:09):
I think, Yeah, you rally your parents do? They don't
have to listen just hit play on their phones. Yeah. Right,
So we're just on anchor right now. Because the other
thing was we didn't want you guys think like that
we were starting our own podcast is like a way
to to you know, like to to build a pocket.
This is all just the labor of love for us.
So we just had it on anchor and we would

(01:11:31):
only seat it out, like we would tweet every episode
and tag you guys in it and then email Joel
and be like, Joel, we made another episode and we're
on Twitter barely. We gave up Twitter for sanity sake.
But um, but Joel, you should be retweeting it because
Joel's miss Twitter's retreated a few of us. So how many, um,
how long do you talk about the the the podcast

(01:11:53):
episode in your podcast episode? So, I mean we typically
run to anywhere between like forty five minutes to a
now or when we after we like cut it up
and everything. Um, but yeah, I mean we I think
the episode that we had done with Brittany went a
little bit longer and that ended up becoming its own
episode apart from the actual you know, recap episode. Yeah,

(01:12:16):
recap episode. I'm worried that they're going to beat us
to the cuckold couple. Can book? Make sure we please book.
They're going to hear this and be like, we need
to choose which one do you want? Well, with all respects,
we're not gonna go with the eighteen listeners. They want
to hear, they want their story heard. I am I

(01:12:40):
feel I feeling after this episode that we put up today,
the numbers are gonna grows. Yeah, your numbers are gonna
grow a lot. I'm gonna just say this right now.
You guys seem like very funny, Yes, funny. What do
you guys do for a little bit? You guys seem
like a I don't want to just assume, but uh, Eric,
you seem like you're a brown man. Uh and Will

(01:13:03):
Will you seem like you are a white man. So
you got your whole you have the whole chocolate and
vanilla guy thing going. Are you guys? Where do you hey,
where do you live? I'm outside of Philly, I'm in Queens,
New York? Okay, and um, and you got the Tri

(01:13:24):
state area thing going? Okay and then um and then
what do you guys really that's Connecticut, Jersey in New York.
But hey, you got it. You know, hey, partner Amtrak
still goes right there, guys, what do you guys do
for jobs? So? I work in farma and uh will
I work in advertising? I do analytics. Okay? Are you

(01:13:45):
a sales rep for Big Farmer Derek? No? No, so
I'm a program manager. Okay, Well we won't hold it
against um. All right, do you guys have a question?
That's why you're here. You worked very hard to get
on the show. Yeah, yeah, so, Uh, Scrubs was originally
on around the time where there were a lot of
other amazing shows that were on. Was there ever any

(01:14:08):
opportunity for like a crossover episode? And if not, was
there any particular show that you would have wanted to
have done a crossover with? Well, just the Arrested thing,
you know we did. I think we told that story
that you know, we we were on opposite networks and
Jason and I were friendly and we got them to
allow us to do that. That was kind of the
closest I think it ever. God, you know, back in

(01:14:30):
the old days, they would like literally the characters would
go on other shows. I mean usually they were like,
you know, the same producer like Gary Marshall, you know,
that kind of thing. Oh no, well when we did Clueless,
when I was doing Clueless and television show Back in
a Day and we were on the same network as
Moitia and oh, we had a crossover episode where we

(01:14:52):
had you know, Mesy on the episode. We had Lamont Bentley,
God rusta Soul. He was on the episode. Uh, and
if I'm if I'm correct, Shar Jackson, Shar it was
Shar Jackson, Lamont Bentley, and then uh, gab Union who
was not on either. My wife, Yeah, yeah, she was
in the episode as well, but that that had nothing

(01:15:16):
to do with like one was the Paramountain movie. Like
it was really odd, but you know it worked. Do
you remember when um um on Scooby Doo they would
have like, was it the Harlem Globe article was just
one of the most recent version of Really Yeah, dude, Yeah,

(01:15:39):
Scooby Doo is my jam That was my favorite kid show,
really my favorite kids I think I think Scooby Doo
is probably like my favorite kids animated show. Yeah, at
the age I was right for it. Yeah, Scooby Doo
is a classic. It really is. All you gotta show
your kids or show your daughter. She'll probably be into it.

(01:15:59):
Donald's were like the version we watch, No, no, no no,
they watch Scooby Doo. They know exactly school, you know,
but not the new ship. I'm sure that they've they've
watched old school Scooby Doo exactly, and I would have
gotten away with it. It It weren't for those damn kids.
Damn kids. But that's in every that's an even in
every in every incarn is an incarnation of ourselves. In
every incarnation of Scooby Doo. They always do that line.

(01:16:21):
Never at least, but I'm not going to watch the movies.
All right, Um, what's your next question, guys? Um our
next question? Uh? It actually has to do a little
bit with something that we've talked about on our podcast,
which is from so we've talked about in about how

(01:16:46):
Bill Lawrence created all of these shows, you know, Spin City,
Ted Lasso, Cougarhound, Scrubs. We believe we have a theory
that this is all within a shared universe, that there
are variants of character. We've already even this in Cougartown,
that there's a variant of Zach that's a delivery man. Well,
I think I think in Cougartown Ted plays Ted right,

(01:17:07):
Oh yeah, that's the link. Yeah, that's the that starts.
So what we're wondering is if if this is all
Bill Lawrence's universe, who has created it? Is he? Is
he a benevolent god? Donald? You're not going to the Watcher?
Is he? Is he he who remains of the of

(01:17:28):
the Bill Lawrence universe? The the I don't think. I
don't think he minds there being variants. I think he
and I think if anything, Bill would enjoy their being.
I don't understand these these sci fi nerd terms you're using.
Can you translate to people that don't play D and D.
So essentially Bill has shown up in Scrubs twice and

(01:17:49):
Ted has shown up in Cougartown as Ted. So there's
so Bill clearly exists in different versions within this universe
that he's created. So how does Bill link all of
this together? How do we think this is all combined
in this world? You're saying that um Lasso is existing
in the same units verse as sugar Town and Scrub

(01:18:13):
like you see that there was a thing I retweeted
a while ago because I do occasionally lurk on there,
and there was some someone who had done a match
for each character of lasts to Scrubs. Did you see that? Yeah? Yeah,
I thought that was clever. Ye, Like, we think it's
it's entirely possible that there could be a flashback in
Ted Lasso season two or three where Roy Kent is

(01:18:34):
like I went to this American surgeon when I hurt
my knee and it cuts to Donald face on its
Chris Turk being like, well, how about this, Let's ask
Bill Lawrence right now. Okay, Well give him the dame
that you coined, you guys, you guys can ask the question.
Go ahead, all right, Bill, Bill, are are our friends here?

(01:18:56):
Derek and Will have a question for you. Go ahead,
Derek and Will Bill. We we believe in what we
have coined the Bill Lawrence Extended Cinematic Universe, or the BLCU,
in which Bill Bill Bill controls all of one shared
universe between the Scrubs, Spin City, Sugar Down, Dead, Lasso, etc.
Is do do you confirm this theory right now? On

(01:19:19):
his podcast? Oh? The people want to know Bill want
to know? You guys think you can just ask Bill,
Like whenever you have something you want to ask Bill, Like,
I'm just here waiting to look. I'll tell you this.
You can because I've got nothing going on, and UM,

(01:19:42):
please ask Bill Moore the Bill Lawrence universe, Um, not
the one that's in my head, the TV show one.
I feel like you left out Clone High because here's
some trivia. The janitor from Scrubs played the janitor m
in Clone High, and if you go back and see

(01:20:02):
what his name was, his name was Glenn and on
the cartoon and that's where we got his name in Scrubs.
The confusing thing about the Scrubs universe, Cougartown, Scrubs, Spin City,
Clone High, hopefully Ted Lasso is that I think Scrubs

(01:20:24):
exists in some shows. So I think Sam Lloyd still
played Ted Buckland on Cougartown, but the Todd was the gardener,
but he still did high fives. And Zach was not
Zach because in Cougartown, j D would never be a
pizza delivery boy, and Busy Fell's character on Cougartown had

(01:20:47):
a Zach Braffe app app in which the app told
you what appetizers was to order. I do like to
believe that there's some kind of system, and I'm working
on it now, and I think it probably revolves a
little bit around uh hopefully you're seeing the scrubs cast
on ted Lasso sometime. If I can make that happen,

(01:21:09):
then it's the multiverse and it works. Uh, miss you
guys talks in I think it would really help help
your case as if I were to have a role
on ted Lasso, as I'm not gonna lie to you
at all, dude, I would love to be on ted Lasso.
And I think they have a rule um in their bible,

(01:21:30):
in the in their show bible that uh that there's
no Americans other than other than other than Beard and Jason.
And that's that's that's fine. I will fucking work on
a bridge. There's the variant of doctor Chris Turk. He's
a British. That doesn't mean that I mean we can't

(01:21:52):
get on the show. But someone someone could say, someone
could reference a famous surgeon named Yeah, I had no
idea that the owner of the team is the freaking
nun shame the shame nun from freaking Game with Thrones.
You want to talk about a glow up has not

(01:22:13):
to humble brag, but I was drinking with Hannah last night.
She is she has the body of Jessica Rabbit. Yes
it does and I was like, I didn't want to
say it, but you did. I didn't want to say it.
You did. She does. I said it to her face.
I said, your body is insane. You're like Jessica Rabbit,
you are so beautiful and she's the sweetest person. And

(01:22:36):
you know that's really her voice singing, because she told me,
I don't know if you saw on her. On her
instant stories, she put her rehearsing the Christmas song because
she had people being like, there's no way that's her,
and she was like, okay, and so she put the
rehearsal video on the insane there's no way that's her.

(01:22:59):
That's to hate, and I hate. It's hard to believe
someone's that beautiful, is that talented and acting and can
also see like who again, just how she's incredible and
she's the most humble, sweet, loving person. You love to
hear it. Yeah, I think she's gonna win this weekend.
I think, I think, I think I have very high

(01:23:21):
I have very high hopes for ted Lasso this weekend.
I'm not gonna lie. By the time this airs, you guys,
it'll have already be long, this will be old news.
But I have high hopes and it'll be interesting. Um,
we're banking episodes for those of you who don't know,
because I'm going to direct a movie and I can't
do a podcast while i'm directing a movie. So that's

(01:23:43):
why we've gotten far ahead. Um, but not only we
should say this, also go ahead, Donald, And it's Donald's
right in the midst of doing Why is it funny?
Why it's always funny. It's always funny, always funny. It's
a class, it's a classic because you're my best friend.
And the joke is, I've forgotten your name learning fuck tits, Sorry,

(01:24:07):
don't Joel's covering surface, fucking shit, pimple, you are a pimple? Okay,
t ears, alright, finish your boring ass story. Good. We're
banking episodes. What and while we're doing it, I'm also
in the midst of creating a television show and so

(01:24:32):
because of that, we might come up short, and so
there might be a hiatus that happened. But that's when
I think y'all can do some of your black side.
You've got real careful, real quick, real careful. I couldn't
remember the name. Oh oh, I don't understand what you're implying,

(01:24:56):
all right, Joel, but if we come up short, because
I'll be making the move, why don't you guys use
the slot with some black side. I was hoping that
we could get maybe the rewatch of the Rewatch. Well,
I don't know. With all due respect to these gentles,
I going to pretend to be Zach and Donald for
a couple episodes, and Rewatch be like, yeah, I remember

(01:25:17):
filming the scene that was on our list of things
to do for this podcast. We were going to like
write a script about like a fake like episode of
fake Doctor's Real Friends and just like have actors like
read as if they were like Zach and Donald talking
about oh yeah, season twelve of Scrubs. I remember that
we actually flew out to San Diego for that one.
You just had a lot of a lot of free time,
and it's a pandemic. We had nothing to do, all right,

(01:25:40):
all right, we just came up with all right, think
it's time for Philadelphia and and Queens New York. Yeah,
favorite segment. Go on, Donald, it's time for It's time too,
but little little time, it's time to fix your Go ahead, gentlemen,

(01:26:12):
you have to have a shared fix your life. Yeah,
we do. We'll take it away. Uh, okay, well I'll
start us off. Guys. Um, so we obviously started this
uh podcast to be invited to come talk with you
guys as guests on your podcast. It worked, It worked.
It must have been on your white board. It must
have been on your white board. Daniel, who's not here?

(01:26:36):
A thunder pause. So admittedly we're feeling today a bit
like the dog that caught the car. Okay, uh, Derek,
you want to yeah? So so what what our fix?
Our fix? Our life question for you is where do
we go from here? What? Like? What should our new
goal be? Now that Well, I think you guys, I

(01:26:57):
think you guys are genuinely funny and charming, and you
have great banter. I think you should keep going with
your podcast. It doesn't need to be about our rewatch
if that becomes like not boring or you're over it,
but or no one's listening to it more importantly, I
don't know, maybe they are, maybe after this plug they will,
but I definitely think but I definitely think you guys

(01:27:18):
have a great banter and you're funny, and you should
make if it's not what you've been doing to get
on the show. You should keep it going with something
else that really interests you. And you love chatting about
with your best friend, right, Donald, and you guys are
in a different state, you know what I mean. It's
a great way to keep in touch with each other.
You have an appointment every week. I don't know how
many times you do your podcast, but you have an

(01:27:40):
appointment every week to talk to each other, you know
what I mean. We might as well stick it out
to see what happens. Bring in some side bring in
some sidekicks like Daniel and Joel. So we actually we
did have a guest. So we had our one guest
who is on your podcast? We had another guest come
on who we found out mid recording not only did
not listen to the episode of Fake Doctors Your Friends,

(01:28:01):
but had never seen Scrubs before. Oh my god, and
we were it was It was pretty funny. We were
just like, why did you choose that guest because he's
a very good friend of ours and let you guys
were starving for guests. Yeah, we were interviewed. It would
be better to interview your cat. Now listen, Why don't
you guys, why don't you guys? Let me ask you

(01:28:25):
something serious question. If obviously you love scrubs and you're
interested in scrubs, what would what's something that you both
share a love for that you wouldn't mind chatting for
hours on end, you know, once or twice a week
about Well, I think I think I know what the
answer the question is gonna be. It's probably gonna be
just TV end or movies in general, just film and cinema. Yeah, definitely,

(01:28:49):
there there's a very big market for that. People are
looking to listen to stuff like that. No, you just
find you got to build an audience listen, Joe. I'll
go ahead say it, Joe, Joel, I should be asking you.
It seemed like you were about to say something. I'm sorry. No,
she's watching Clone Wars in the backroom ridiculous, as were

(01:29:15):
sometimes Joel reacts on the chat, and it's not to
what we're saying. It's to fucking something that happened on
Clone Wars in the backroom. She's watching Rebels. She's watching
Rebels by the way, she's watching Rebels. She's watching She's
watched Rebels nine hundred times, but she still reacts surprised
when Lafal gets saved a beautiful moment. Okay, oh my god,

(01:29:40):
all right, well listen, guys, I think that Uh, it's
really fun. I love doing this with these guys, and
it's something you know, Donald and I obviously have a
shared humor of the surreal experience. That's a very unique
experience to go back and watch something we did for
ten years that we barely remember, um, and we laugh at.
It's our sense of humor. So if I were you, UM,

(01:30:02):
find something that you just love talking about and and
build an audience that way, because because when you really
are passionate about something and you're lit up by it,
it's you know, it's contagious. It's infectious. People love it.
They want to The people that share your love of
whatever films or TV or video games or whatever you
guys are reviewing or talking about, they'll they'll they'll be

(01:30:24):
right there with you. It's just about building community. Now,
if you're famous and you've been on a famous TV show,
you can build a community a lot faster, it goes
without saying, but so you'll build your community perhaps a
bit slower, but that doesn't mean that you won't build
a community and and have a lot of fun doing it,
and I don't. That's that's my advice. Not only that,
I think a lot of people tune into fake doctors,
I hope because they enjoyed the camaraderie Zach and I have.

(01:30:48):
You know what I mean, they are truly best friends.
And so if that if you can have, you know,
if you can have that shine through on your program,
I promise you it. You know it infectious. People do
enjoy listening to two buddies shoot the shit and and
and kindness. Kindness is contagious, they say, And we try

(01:31:08):
to promote kindness here. So even though he is a
fucking shit pimple. Wow, So does that mean that my
pimples when you pomp them, shit comes out? Mother? I
am or I am said pimple? You are, said, pimple
on aund of shit? Oh say I see. So if
there's a mound of shit and there, it's like you

(01:31:30):
remember at the end of Um of Weird Science when
they turned chet into a pile of shit. You're saying that,
I'm like a pimple on the chet. You're the pimple
that pops that. You remember when it spews out he's like,
oh god after he yeah, after? Is that? What is
that what Ched has turned into a pile of shit
or is it just a monster blob? I think he

(01:31:51):
turned into a Do you guys have an opinion on
what Ched has turned into? At the end of Weird Science? Okay,
but that shit makes me laugh so hard? Oh god.
All right, guys, you've been great guests, and uh, and
we hope that your show becomes so big that we

(01:32:13):
have to create a rewatch podcast to get on your show.
So we we were actually going to invite you. Uh no,
it'll never no, no, no no. If you know, we
were going to if you know anyone making a podcast
that wants to make a rewatch podcast of a rewatch
podcast of a rewatch podcast, and we can just keep
this going to infinity. Oh man, just like will well well, no, well,

(01:32:36):
will you've flown too close to the sun. Oh my god,
do you hear that? I don't know. It's like I
think they're moving on to taking out the trunk. He
did it, We did it, but we did it. You're welcome.

(01:32:56):
You guys can stay on because we're gonna end the
show here. That's a funny episode and uh, we thank
you all for listening, and uh and join us next
time for more adventures with fake doctors, real friends. Donalds
one of those numbers people love to hear. Seven eight
stories about show we made about a bunch of doctor

(01:33:18):
nurses and Jannah I said, here's the stories Netel should know.
So yeado around you. Here are gato around you, Here
are swept free. Watch you with mm hmmm.

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Donald Faison

Zach Braff

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