619: My Cold Shower

On this week's episode, everyone is being rejected sexually and thus showers in "cold water" to starve off their desire. In the real world, we talk to a robotic surgeon and Zach explains what it's like directing superstar, Harrison Ford. 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, I miss you guys. No, you don't, I really do.
I've been thinking a lot about you, have you while
you were hanging out with Harrison Ford. I have been
hanging out with Harrison Ford. You guys, it's pretty insane.
So you've been thinking about us while you were hanging
out with her. My nephew, I find that hard to believe.
I sent my picture. I sent my nephew a picture
of me directing Harrison Ford, and he said, this is

(00:25):
what do you call It? Was like a bad guy
in a movie, like the Origin story? Yeah, villain's story.
Yeah yeah, so wrote my nephew wrote, this is Donald's
villain origin story. Oh my god. I love him for
that because he's absolutely he's fun. Oh that's how it happens.

(00:47):
I gotta tell you the funniest thing. So I'm i'm,
i'm I'm directing this show with Harrison Ford and Jason
Siegel and I'm having so much fun. But I drive
on the Warner Brothers lot and everybody's got COVID. But
by the way, yeah, that's not what I was gonna say.
But there's been like a spike La Counties, like kind
of we'll have to put masks back on inside again.

(01:09):
But it was in the news that like, like one
of the major hotsputs was the Warner Brothers lot. We
just remember shooting, so obviously we're being so strict about
masks and testing and everything. And anyway, I'm driving on
the Warner Brothers lot, which, for those of you who
don't know in Hollywood is is you know, you see
it actually in the beginning of Warner Brothers movies they
show all those giant airplane hangar looking things. It's a

(01:29):
very special place. It's where they've been making one of
the places they've been making movies since the thirties, where
it all began. Every stage has a listed on the
on a plaque outside the door, all the movies and
TV shows that have been filmed there. And it's just
I'm kidding me. Is still geeked out every single time
I'm working on one of these lots and I drive on,
I pull into the gate and the guard says, welcome back,

(01:51):
mister Braff, I really love you. On Bill's podcast, Russ's
fucked up, man, It's hilarious what I'm backhanded compliment. No,
he was being silly. He's a fan and he listens.
You know, honesty, this is Bill's podcast. What I really
think about it, I mean, it's our podcast, but we

(02:12):
talk about pretty much everything Bill Lawrence on this. It's
all Bill all the time. Yeah. Well, I'm working with
him and I'm having so much fun. He's so good
at what he does and he's so funny. And Jason
Segels so cool. Couldn't be a nicer fellow. That's oh yes,
love to hear that. And Christ's in it and she's hilarious.
But of course the big story is Harrison Ford, who

(02:33):
said my name like for the first time, and I
was like, oh my god, he knows who I am?
How long did it take your name? Well, like day
one and two? You know, I was just, you know,
I think they're all um. He's getting used to the
idea that on series TV, the directors different every week,
so I think that, like, you know, he's never done
that before, right, And so at first I think he

(02:55):
was a little like, you know, he's super warm and
kind obviously, but he I think he's just a little like,
you know, this is weird. The director changes every week
kind of vibes That's what I felt. But then you know,
I think I'm pretty good at it, and he I
think since that actually he told me so much so
he started learning my name and then he was like

(03:17):
the best thing to happen the other day. It was
like one thing to be like, um, you know, is
this where you want me? On mark? But it was
another like the other day. He asked me like a
like a like an acting note. He was like, Zach,
do you think it's more like Zach? Do you think I?
And I was like, oh my god, he knows my
name and it appears to me he's acting. He's asking
me an acting question. Were you able to Yeah? It

(03:39):
was like about should I play it more? Do you
think it's better more like this? Or should I be?
Or do you think the character is more like this?
And I'm like, oh my god, we're not just talking
blocking now, we're talking like performance. This is amazing. It's
so cool, man, it's so cool. Do you want it?
The funniest shit there was a character that they ran
I think randomly named Luke, just like like a someone
he references and I didn't put two and two together,

(04:02):
but he's like, which one of you is Luke? I
was like, oh, one god, he said Luke. He said Luke,
and then at a certain point you forgot the name.
He goes, what's his name? I go, you know the
name Luke, and everybody laughed. It's just so crazy. I mean, like,
there aren't that many movie stars anymore, you know what
I mean. He was one of the last movie stars.

(04:23):
There's one movie star. One moviem Cruise, No Tom Cruise,
that's Tom Cruise. O Tom Cruise. Did you see Tom Gun?
Did you seem seen it? But it just beat Titanic.
It's it's it's paramount's biggest movie of all time. That true.
He's the one and only seven hundred million just domestically. Yeah,
he's Have you seen it? No? But everybody tells me too,

(04:44):
I haven't seen it. I seen it. I would and
saw it, and I was like, I'm not gonna lie.
I would and saw with hate in my heart as
I'm walking into your heart because I'm like that first
movie so cheese, dude, come on, it's bad. It's like,
doesn't I mean, my wife loved my wife That's the
only time I've seen it too. My wife loves it.

(05:05):
She grew up on it. My wife's like if I
got Casey up here right now, she'd be like, oh
my god, right she could. She probably start crying talking
about how much she loved Top Gun as a kid,
you know what I mean. Right. So she's been begging
me to go, and I'm like, I don't want to
see that ship. There's no black people in Top Gun.
There's no fucking you know what I mean, Like I'm

(05:25):
going down the list of hate, you know what I mean.
And she goes, come on, let's just go, and I'm like,
no way. So her friend takes her to see it. Right,
her girlfriend takes her to see it, and she comes
back and she's like, Babe, I go to see all
I went and saw a Guardian too, the Galaxy with you.
I go to see all your bullshit, you know what
I mean? This is one thing. She's like, I saw it,

(05:48):
I'm willing to see it again. Please come with me
to see top So I'm walking into the movie like
she threw her she threw guilt at me, you know
what I mean. So I don't want to watch this right. Oh,
he really loved it, audience. He's covering his eyes. He

(06:10):
really loved it, Zach. It's one of the best movies
ever made. Dude, cereal like no bullshit, like no bullshit,
Like I don't know how to explain. I don't know
how to explain because look, I'm a Tom Cruise fan,
but I'm the guy that only sees his movie movies once.
I don't go and see Tom Cruise movies over and

(06:31):
over again. For some reason, that's just not for me.
This there's only a couple of them. Risky business. I've
seen way more than once, you know what I mean. Uh,
and I think maybe cocktails I've seen twice, but you
know what you know, but everything else one time. This movie,

(06:54):
I can't wait for it to come out on streaming
so I can watch it over and dude, it is
so it's so good. It's so good, all right, dude,
Like Tom Cruise is a true movie star man like
I clowned for so long. It's amazing, you know, because
because he's he's the longevity he's had and he's kind

(07:17):
of like the last one standing that can that can
still do that solely on his name. I mean Auntie
top guns of property that people remember from from growing up.
But I mean it's just he's just he's like the
last standing bona fide. Did you see the trailer for
the next mission. Impossible. No, holy fuck, dude. Yeo, this

(07:38):
shit looks crazy, dude, this shit looks crazy. Dope, Like,
I can't. I'm sitting there and I'm like, oh my god,
it's caught up to me. Let me tell you something
that I loved that you wouldn't have thought. I loved
Winning Time. I knew you'd love that. I loved it.
And you know the best part about you know, the
best part of that. First of all, you know, the

(07:59):
best part about Winning Time for me is I don't
know the end. So I was joking. I was joking
with Jason Siegel, who's one of the stars and who's incredible,
and all the all the performances in that show are excellent,
every single actor, and Would Wood Harris isn't there. Yeah, yeah,
he plays. Oh he's gonna win an award. He's incredible.

(08:21):
He does a great job in it. And Tracy Letts
and and of course John c. Rally. Anyway, I loved it.
But the funny thing I was joking was Jason Siegel
and Bill Lawrence, both big sports fans. I was like,
the funny thing for me watching is I don't know
the ending. So I'm so caught up in it, and
I find myself like alone in my house when they
when they beat Boston U and like my arms are

(08:42):
going up in the air like I'm alone, and I'm
like cheering from my from my gus. No idea. And
then Jason was like, you know when we went in
the end, and I was like, spoilers. I was like,
He's like, oh, most people know that, but I'm telling
you the audience if you're not. Obviously, if you're a

(09:04):
sports fan, you gotta watch it. But even if you're
not a sports fan, Um, it's incredible and you won't
you won't know how it unfolds. Um, and that obviously
they're going to continue with because it's so good. I'm
nineteen eighty, What do ye do? Seventy nine? It was
seventy nine? No, I think they won an eighty. I
believe seventy nine. Eighties? So what year just Jordan, do
you know what year he comes into the picture. He's

(09:26):
a few years later. Oh, because I'm interested now, I mean,
I know they're I know they're going to continue. Would
be interesting to know if if they go right after
or if they jump a few years and wait till
Jordan comes into the mix. Well they should go right
after because the story, that's what's up four. Oh, there
you go. I didn't know that Larry Bird was such
an asshole to him to magic and this is based

(09:48):
on a true story. Come on now, No, but I
think I think that they've said, and Bill told me
that they've they've since become obviously in the years since
they become friends, and they um and and Larry acknowledged
that he was a Jerry that's what Bill said at least.
Well look, okay, so here's the thing, here's what I understand.
A lot of this we can't like because I understand it. Uh,

(10:11):
Jerry West is a little upset about how he definitely
doesn't definitely doesn't how he's portrayed in this. I think
he comes off fine to be he comes, but in
the beginning, you're like, this is the worst person in
the world and on the planet, right, And I don't
think anybody wants to be portrayed is that? But uh,
you know, from everything that from everything that I understand

(10:32):
and watching sports through my eyes, obviously, Uh, he what
he's done for the Laker organization, the Memphis organization, like
he's brought in like Kobe Bryant is by far. You know,
that's him, Shack organizing the deal to get shocked to La.
That's him so he can keep the story going for

(10:54):
a long time. Oh man, dude, he's he's, he really
is the reason why the town and pool and that
like his his his eye for talent when other people
can't see it is amazing, Like he could tell you
who's going to be good and who's not gonna be
all you gotta do want to be a Laker fan
as the eighties get As the eighties go on, you'll

(11:14):
see this man like people like Kurt Rambis comes in
and plays for the Lakers, and you're like, who the
heck is this guy? A happy When Daryl Dawkins appeared
at the end as a seventy six er, Yeah, because
you know, as I've told you before, he was he
was all I knew about basketball, and my dad would

(11:34):
drag me to go see the nets. But then you know,
he's he's, uh, he's portrayed in the end. Wait before
we maybe want to be a Laker fan though, dude,
I really, like I realized if you're if you know
all the stories, I mean that it's gonna sound idiotic
to people who love sports, But bear with me. If
you know all the soap opera and you know all
the drama and you know the everyone's unique stories, I

(11:58):
can totally understand how you be so invested and excited
about it. Okay, So for the few point times in
my life where I've gotten to hang out with NBA players,
like on a chill level, it's been with I've been
invited to Jerry Buss's suite and got to sit next
to him and Magic Johnson before he passed away. Wow.

(12:21):
And then one time I got to hang out I
was hanging out with Leo and Jerry Buss in uh
in the lounge that the Laker lounge. That he's really right,
So he continued it going at Staple Center. Yeah, and
its team. Now I've been at a forum and stuff
like I was. I've seen him play at the forum

(12:41):
when they were at the forum too interesting back in
the day before they moved, before they moved to I've
been out in LA for a while. Bro. No, I
didn't know what year they moved to the Staple Center
or whatever it's called. Now it's called a Bitcoin Arena
or something. Anyway, both times I made an ass out
of myself. One time I was trying to be like,

(13:02):
you know, in the mix because they brought up money,
and I was like, oh, yeah, let's talk about money.
And I could tell that everybody was like, you dumbass,
this is Jerry Buss. What do you do? This in
your head's analyzing him in my mind, that's what I thought.
And then the other time. Then the other time I
was like, well, because look it's true, Jerry would make

(13:23):
it so and this is this is just from the
little bit of experience that I had and watching the
show when you went and hung out, it really did
feel like that where there were just like a lot
of beautiful women around. There was a lot of food,
a lot of drink, and freaking you're watching basketball and
you're having a great time. Right. He created that environment,

(13:44):
He created like the Playboy mansion meets sports. Yeah, and
he did that successfully. And watching this and watching this
show and watching John c Riley play this guy who's
so like on the urge of failure, really like this
whole time, all it takes is just a little bit,

(14:05):
just that one straw. We're just waiting for that one straw,
But especially if you don't know the outcome of the story.
If you know the outcome of the story, everything's gonna
be all right, right, everything until until until Jason Siegel
ruined it for me, gave me spoilers, right, He's like,
they're not really spoilers, right, But if you don't but
if you don't know, but if you do know, just

(14:27):
watching like, dang, they had he had this much going
against him. I didn't know it was that close. If
he would have lost that game, if they didn't win
the championship. Yeah, and Kareem going in at the out
at the end, and the person of all the actors
who I think are unknown to most people. I've never
seen them before, but the gentleman playing Kareem and the

(14:48):
gentleman playing Magic, and they're so good. There's so dude,
do you know the dude playing bus to dude playing
freaking West. All of them would like you said, at all, Man,
like amazing, that's amazing. What's gonna win the award? Man?
He's fucking heat. And that last episode when he does
that monologue about his childhood, I'm getting goosebumps thinking about it.

(15:11):
It was so good. Did he can nominate it. No,
I think it will be next year, but um right,
you well I don't believe. So I don't know. All
I know because because the Emmys just came out, just
came out, it would be okay. Anyway, all I know
is this, it's been up. I thought he he would
get nominated for this. But anyway, all I know is this,
if they do another season and they skip ahead, okay, Well,

(15:34):
if they skip ahead, I think they're doing a disservice
because there's something really special about Magic Johnson and Larry
Bird after that season. Uh and and and uh them
developing their friendship. There's something really dope about the Boston
Lake or rivalry and but not just that, just the
two of them, and you gotta build on that. You

(15:55):
gotta build on it. I'm thinking, like I was just thinking.
The very little I know is that, like at a
certain point, Organ comes into the mix, and that's gonna
be really interesting too. Well when Jordan comes into mix,
HIV comes in in a mix too, like well they
end this, they start this, remember talking about them getting diagnosed. Yeah,
like Jordan, should we get in Absolutely, we could totally
get in the show. I just want to say one thing.

(16:16):
Eat these balls, zachn eat these balls Zach five, six, seven, eight.
Stories about show we made about a bunch of nurses,
said the stories. Never so yeadoo around here, yeadoo around here.

(16:45):
How are you, man? I'm good, man, I'm good. I
miss you, I miss your face. You look good. I
feel like I've been run over by a truck. Dude. Why, well, first,
I'm smoking some of the best weed you've ever smoked
in your life. Why two, man, these kids, it's summertime
and it's real in the field, and the tricks that

(17:06):
we were using in the beginning are no longer tricks.
They become habits and they can't be habits. Or this
kid or both of these kids are going to go
back to school not prepared for the grades that they're
going into, and so we're it's a crunch time mode
now because we're at the end of the year, at
the end of summer and uh, it's been a lot

(17:26):
of fun, but preparation for the school year has begun.
Oh you mean you mean like they gotta they gotta
do like a homework or what do you mean, like
you know, just like just like yeah, behavior wise, training
the brain to get ready to go back to school.
You know, Rocco's going in the third grade. That's a
big deal. Man, Things get real at that age, you

(17:47):
know what I mean. Homeboys comes home, you know. And
so I saw them, I saw them both kicking ass
on the basketball court. Well, they're good at sports, you know, Roco.
Those videos you posted, Roccos killing it, dude, Dude Wilder, Dude,
I love Rocco Rocco guy game, and I've seen it.
But I just can't get over the fact that my

(18:07):
daughter is the smallest one on her team. She's you know,
very very like, very very shy, you know, when meeting people,
like I took her to the Zombie three premiere and
when she met all of the stars. At first, it
was like taking her on a ride to Disneyland where
she didn't want to get on and didn't. After it
was over, she was the best ride ever and wanted

(18:27):
to put again and again and again right right right,
and so like doing basketball is kind of the same thing.
Where you would think she'd get on the court and
she'd be afraid to play, and at first she was,
but once she got in there, like now, we can't
get her off the court. Unless she's extremely tired and
she goes hard, dude, and she could get She's aggressive

(18:51):
and I would have never expected that from Wilder, but
she's like extremely aggressive, like the if the ball is
near her, she's going for it. And it's really it's
it's amazing to watch you created two little minimes. Well,
I didn't play basketball growing up. I was a theater guy,
you know what I know. But you love basketball. So
it's just as sweet that they that they love it too,

(19:13):
and you can share that. I'm trying to keep them
away from theaters. One of Like, it's really interesting because
it's happened with your daughter. Your daughter is a performer.
I know I got to send you to videos from
dance camp, but she's such a performer. There's no way
that girl is not going to be a dancer or
an actress or something. Yeah, we'll see. All right, let's
talk about the show Scrubs. Everybody Elliott says, yes, my

(19:35):
cold shower. Now. One of the funniest things about the episode,
mistake wise, is obviously none of us wanted to really
get in a cold shower, so you can see a
giant red mark on all of our chests when we're
supposedly taking a cold shower, is especially mine. It was
a set shower, you know, so they bring in like
a hot water tank. But I remember, I'm laughing at

(19:55):
every time they cut to me, is a giant red
spot in the middle of my chest, and I'm like,
that's not a nice cold shower, bro, that's a hot shower. Um.
Director by John Inwood, who is our cinematographer for almost
every single episode of Scrubs, and he directed this one.
He didn't, And Elliott says yes. Well, Eliot says yes,

(20:17):
but then the ring doesn't fit and she's just livid.
And then the fricks come, here, come the fricks. Just
put the mother fricking ring on my mother fricking hand.
Frick frick on a stick with a brick frick first
sounds really bad, even though it's just frick. Um. Yeah.

(20:40):
So Elliot was pissed because she's been she's been wanting
this moment for her whole life, and she had it
all planned, and she planned what she was gonna say, yes,
oh my god, yes, and when the finger, when the
ring doesn't fit her finger, the whole thing's ruined. And
Keith offers that the opportunity that she can replan the
whole thing. Okay, I gotta call Casey because this is

(21:00):
my life. Okay, play the song down, come down here.
I don't know nothing about the schools'll tell me what
to do these kids and that's what to do this. Yeah,
you did do that. Okay, Now let me set this
sec Zacha love Zacha love za za za zach zach

(21:24):
I love you. Hey, will you plan your own proposal?
What happened? So look, let me set the story. Let
me set it up. She and I had been dating
for a long time when we first met. Yeah, when
we first met, I said, she said to me. Sorry,
She said to me, look, I don't want to get
married and I don't want to have children, and so

(21:45):
check right, oh check, let's go home and yeah yeah okay,
yeah yeah, I was like, check, let's go do it
right anyway. Cut two, We're now dating for seven years,
seven years at this point, and she's now on that
shit or get off the pot. I wanted a baby.

(22:07):
I didn't want to get married, but I wanted a baby, right,
And then we tried to have a baby and it
was not working right. So my doctor was like, you
should pick up a hobby, and so Donald said, why
don't you plan a wedding? Oh? So I was like, okay, now,
don't even try that ship. I don't even try that ship.

(22:29):
So I was like, oh, don't try that shit. I
needed to take my mind off of getting pregnant and
focus on something. So I said, we have a little
wedding in the little backyard. Wedding in your backyard's act. No,
that's not how this happened. I started working on that. No,
but thanking. I didn't want to get married, but I
wanted a ring, right, So I knew exactly what I wanted.

(22:53):
And so look, so I'm like, I'm gonna get her
a ring, But in my mind, I'm like, I'm going
to Tiffany's to get this ring out, get her a
ring from Tiffany. She's and I tell her I'm gonna
get a ring from Tiffany's. And she's like, what don't
you freaking do that? Well, because in my mind I
knew I'd get a ring from Tiffany's and I won't
get nothing else. She said, don't spend too much money

(23:16):
on the money, Like, let's be let's be practical, all right,
let's go on the ring hunt. Let's go on the
diamond hunt. So she and I go to different places
and we go looking at diamonds. We went to every
diamond store. We learned about diamond learned about diamonds, learned
about clarity and everything. And so finally we find this

(23:38):
guy named Jason right, yeah, Jason Hills. Yes, give him
a shout out, love, you give him a shout out,
and somehow convinced him to give us this really big
diamond for a certain amount of money. I'm not gonna
say how much it is. My god, this is what.
Off the side roads and onto the freeway. He's like,

(23:59):
when do you want it delivered? And what did you say? Case,
I don't know. You were like, I have a bunch
of things that I have to do on this day.
Can we have it by whatever day? It was that yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
And you're like and I'm like, all right, bet. So
that day comes, She's like, I'm gonna wait at home. No,

(24:23):
you're wrong. Yeah, we were supposed to go pick it up.
We were supposed to go pick it up. And I
came home and I was like, you need to be showered.
We're meeting him at two o'clock. I want my ring.
Before they closed, he said he's going out of town
and won't be back for six days. And I'm like, nope,
we're coming today. I want this ring today, right. And

(24:44):
so you were running late, you were showering. I was
pissed off because you were taking your sweet ass time
in the shower and I was downstairs and join at
the house. Yes I was, And then you said, oh
my god, I gotta find my phone. You ran down
in the garage and I'm pissed off. And then you
come back in through the studio at the Willow Glens

(25:04):
and you opened you hand me the box, and I'm like,
you ain't got this ring without me. She's making up
number you don't remember. That sounds kind of romantic. I'm
going to accept that. I'm apt that's exactly how it happened,
because down on one knee you came into the house.
You came running into the house like this is it here?

(25:25):
Oh maybe I just stood over him coming out of
the garage. And I don't remember if he got down
on one knee. All I remember is that he opened
the box, and part well before you opened the box,
part of me was pissed off. This fucker went and
got this ring without me, and I didn't get to
proof it first, like this is my ring regardless, Like

(25:47):
I wanted to make sure it look good before we
took it, and so I'm pissed off kind of. And
then he opened the box and I remember the box
had a fucking light in it. Yeah, and the ring
was finished, whoa And I was like, and it was
the bigger diamond. Oh you didn't know that, no, because

(26:09):
we had two diamonds to choose from. And I was like,
I think I'll be happy with that with this size. Really,
you know, I'm like, I do like that big one,
but I know we can't afford that big one. But
I got the big one, yes. And then the best
part to the best part, I got the big one,

(26:30):
the best part. He was like, I love you. I
love you, and I was like, oh my god. I
was like, can I go show my friends? And I
left and went over to Jessica's house and all my
friends came over and I and I left Donald on
the couch to pass out, and I didn't come until
midnight that night. So romantic. He was so mad at me.

(26:50):
All Right, we gotta get on the show. Thank you,
We love you, We love you, love you. Love that story.
Everybody likes a little ass play dude. All right, Um,

(27:11):
everybody does like a little ass play Zach. But we
have to talk about the TV show Scrubs. Donald, well,
that has something to do with it, all right, I did.
That's a very sweet story. Um. So everyone throughout the
episode has fantasies about what it would be like if
they were married to Elliott, and yours is by far
the funniest. I laughed out loud. You play like a
preppy guy with the sweater around his and she says, um,

(27:36):
I'm jumping ahead, but she says, keep an eye on Lupita.
I think some of the silverware has gone missing. Now
let me ask you a question, do you think? And
then you turn around and you see this beautiful Latina
woman and a maid's outfit and bent over in a
maid's outfit, and Donald turcos, I'll talk to her, and

(28:01):
then you reveal that it's Carla, and he picks her
up and they go upstairs to make out, and he's like, damn,
I'm having fantasies about my own wife. That's it's been
so long since we had sex. Yeah, let me ask
you a question. In that fantasy that this is gonna
get a little weird. Do you think that Turk and
Lupeta Carla. Do you think she's using him for the

(28:26):
fact that he is rich and married and she's just
trying to, you know, get that money, or do you
think she's in love with him and they're going to
create the like in the timeline of Turkey Carla meant
to be even in the dream. This is such a
weird No, I think that Lupeta is truly in love
with Turk and uh and they're gonna run away one day. Well,

(28:49):
that's the whole joke of it, is like he's supposed
to be having a fantasy about another woman, but he's
fantasizing about his own wife. Okay, I'm gonna say one
more thing. I do fantasize about my own eye. I know.
That's why you guys are so sweet together. It's funny.
I get the joke and everything like that, But in
real life, like well, speaking of real life, much like
your character, a Turk needs sex and she she has

(29:10):
not given sex because she's not in a very long time,
because she's post had a baby and she's not feeling
it yet. Yeah, and um, and Turk is dying because
he really needs to be satisfied. Yes, we learned that
Tod hasn't been late at all. You think that he's
a prolific, but he holds up a zero and goes
When the Jenner asked him, help woman, how many times

(29:32):
he's had sex this year, he goes, Bagel, Well, I
want to go back because we didn't talk about this.
Everybody is really not concerned, but sad for JD that
he didn't get the girl right. He's acting like he
doesn't care, and he's acting like he and for the
most part at this point he doesn't care. One of
the favorite of my favorite lines is pretty girls end

(29:54):
up don't end up with the ugos, and he goes, no,
he goes, pretty girls end up with the ugos Only
in the movi. Yeah, only in the movie. And when
he goes sadly, the Kelso says it to me, sadly,
it's only in the movies where the pretty girl ends
up with the ugo. Yeah, yeah, thanks a lot, Bill,
Leonard Leonard one. It's very funny where he's like, let

(30:17):
me tell you about loss. Yeah, Leonard Leonard holds up
his hook and says, I know about loss Um. Yeah,
everyone's feeling bad for for j D. But j D
is seemingly obsessed for the bulk of the story with
trying to have sex with Kerry Russell's character. But he
doesn't really want to have sex with her. He's being
pressured into having sex with her by his best friend

(30:39):
because his best friend, well he's been pressured inn avosex
with hospital. Yeah, all the men learned that she had
a threesome in college, which is three girls. Yeah, he goes,
you go damn, and all the men hit their table,
which was funny, and then you go, I go, was
it two guys and a girl or a devil's threesome?

(31:00):
She said, three girls? And then I had to pick
the drinks off the table for you to go damn.
So she invites me to the hotel. This is a
bit um bizarre. I mean, it's fine that she just
wants to kiss, but it's it's a little bit bizarre
that she says, hey, come review a hotel room with me,

(31:22):
and Okay, so this is where we're at. Okay, so
this is where we're at now. If it was a
dude and the dude was like, come review a hotel
with me. We'll have a bunch of fun. Hey, let's
test out the bed and all of that stuff. You
wouldn't think anything of it. But because it's a hot chick,
like you know what I mean, Like this, this is
actually coming from the guy. This is coming from the

(31:42):
guy who thought the animation, because this is like a
very mixed signal situation. And now I'm trying to because
what situation where you zone's like, come review a room
with me, please? But is it really? But is it? No? No, no,
this this woman this was like twenty years ago or
if not more. Really, I had no money. Let me
just tell you sorry. I had no money. Never dive

(32:03):
in my name. And I knew a beautiful young woman
who we were We were sort of hanging out, and
she had this deal where she would review hotels and
she her thing was that she had to go stay
in the hotel and use all the services and and
she would invite me when she had the night like
she had to do having to do room service, she
spa and I was broke. It was like the greatest

(32:25):
thing ever. She most definitely um wanted to also hook
up UM, so good. Yeah, that makes sense. Didn't say
it seems right. But if your buddy was like but
but if your buddy was like, Yo, dude, I got
a fucking hotel. Let's go hang out and that ship after,
we'll use all the amenities, maybe go to the casino downstairs,

(32:45):
We'll do all of that shit. Are you expecting to
fuck your buddy? Was I making on them at the
bar the other day? She's talking about macking and there's
no touching too, so that's pretty much stage kissing. Also,
like that's what, that's what. But that's where she was.
But she was. She was so upfront about it too.

(33:07):
It's nothing, all it is. It's all we're doing is kissing.
All we're doing is kissing. The minute you make a sound,
the minute you start touching me, the minute you start
doing all of that stuff. We're not in this anymore.
I could play that she shit. I think anybody could
play that game. It's if the boundary is if I
if you go, we stop right. That's the impetus for

(33:29):
the whole episode is that he endures it. But he
needs a cold shower because he's so turned on. I mean,
he's making out with the beautiful Carrie Russell. But she
told him from the gate, right, But that doesn't mean
that his peep isn't gonna get right. But my point is,
I don't think she's I don't think she's sending mixed
signals because she's not sending into him. She doesn't even
recognize him. She thinks she's she's the other guy, right, exactly,

(33:52):
exactly exactly. That's funny. When I go look at me,
what is the Egyptian? Right, He's like huh. And then
later you're and then they specifically, they specifically gassed and
they found someone who kind of looked like me but
was different. But by the way, Donald, I think you
mistaken from me. Yeah, one point, I'm talking. He doesn't

(34:14):
even have any laughter in his eyes. Um, let's take
a break. When we take a break, and we'll be
right back with more Scrubs, rewatch podcasts, fake doctors from friends, guys,
everybody likes a little ass play, don't even act like
you know, and we're back all right. This yields one

(34:40):
of the wackiest fantasies in all of Scrubs history. Well,
which one, because there's a winter Wonderland? Okay, the janitor one.
But let's go back and just talk about the janitor
one with Elliott, because they say something at the end
when they're like, these aren't our kids, so that they
kidnapped these kids, and the Janitor's fantasy guests they've kidnapped
all these children and made them wear and doctor outfits,

(35:06):
and he mentions the fact that it would be tricky
to get all those tiny clipboards and tiny brooms, and
then at the end that they aren't aren't kids, which
which leads the viewer to infer that they are kidnapped
shoulders stolen kids. Yes, oh my god, that's the janitor's

(35:27):
fantasy for his Okay, that was pretty that was pretty
whacky to me, but nothing. I think this is the
most stoner fantasy, one of the most one of the
pumpkin thing and your testicle growing. Yeah, this one, um is.

(35:49):
I jump into the bed and for some reason, it's
a winter wonderland. Yes, but in that winter wonderland. Carrie Russell,
what's your character's name? I keep calling her Charity Melody,
thank you? Is a is a mermaid? Turk arrives. Let's
just let's just stop there. I don't know how to

(36:12):
have sex with her. Because no one's ever brought up
since Splash, this hasn't come up. How how do they
have sex? Although in Splash when she's on land, she's
a woman, So what they have to go to land
in order for Tom Hanks's character? I think so. I
don't think that they're having sex underwater. No, they're not.
There's no way he goes to when he goes to
visit the family and everything at the end Splash two,

(36:36):
Slash two. If they did, I know Tom Hanks stayed
away Tom Hanks and you can imagine, you can imagine
like meatballs too, they might have made um, they might
have made a Splash too without Tom Hanks and put
it believe. But it's like Aquaman, Dude, It's like Aquaman,
and that it all takes place underwater in her in

(36:56):
her neighborhood. Oh, that just sounds like something he's gonna drown.
Back then, like, let's just be honest, man. Anyway, he
can't fail. Back when we used to actually film movies
underwater right before CG. Anyway, Yeah, remember that there's that movie,
um the Abyss. No, there was one with Liev Schreiber

(37:17):
and Dustin Hoffman and Morgan Freeman. Where they're all underwater?
There were, but remember like, uh, what was the one
where uh, Sam, can you look up the one I'm
talking about? Um? He gets eaten by the shark? Deep
Blue deeps is the one with Lee? What's the one
with Liev Schreiber and um and and Dustin Hoffman and

(37:40):
maybe more and maybe it's either Morgan Freeman or Sam
Jackson one of them. I remember it was like Deep
Star six? Was there like a deep Star six Deep
Blue c What was the one with the Samuel Jackson
isn't it? Sam Jackson is in the one with the
shark deep Yeah, Deepest Deepest Bluish my Hat is like

(38:03):
a sharks fin Is that the one? Cool Jason? Yeah?
He has the sound track? Yeah, he plays the chef.
This is the movie has a bird a polly always
Samuel Jackson that I'm thinking about. Yeah, yes, Sam Jackson's
and that too. Yeah, I think that's all underwater Deepest

(38:23):
Blush my Head is like a sharks fins. You didn't
like it. I only saw pieces of it. I couldn't
believe it existed. That good dud. Yeah, when I was
a kid, shit dudeki me man, that was fire to me.
Man at one point. At one point, els like on
the kitchen table or some shit like that, floating with

(38:45):
the bird, trying to save the bird from the sharks.
That so the sharks get into the into it's like
a it's under it's like an undersea of station, right, yeah, man,
and the sharks get in there. Yeah, and the sharks
get in because they're intelligent. Here was it just part
of No? No, that's just the soundtrack. He's the chef
in the movie. Such a good movie. Man. When I

(39:06):
was a kid, I usually think that was so good.
I was a kid. I was actually an adult, but yeah,
I don't think it was as long ago as he's
being a kid. Anyway, JD can't figure out where to
have sex with the murm woman and you you point,
and she goes, that's well, I show up out. He
shows out of nowhere as a goat goat turk playing
a playing a what would that be a what is

(39:28):
a pan flute? Is that? I think it's that called
a pan flute? Joel, can you look that up? It
is because of Peter. Now you're a part part man.
That's probably it's probably a name for that mythological beast
it's like a minotaur but a goat. I looked it up,

(39:49):
you guys, it's the Oh sorry, I didn't read them
today I find it. Yeah, it's like a minotaur but
a goat, but I prefer to call it goat turk, Like,
wasn't it wasn't that what Fawn was in the Lion,
the Witch and the wardrobe. That's why I'm that's who
we're making a play on. Well, then goes the then

(40:11):
precedes some dialogue that is pretty amazing. She's that's a
gill and you go, yeah, it is, it is, And
I go, go Turk, that's my mermaid, and you go,
my bad. It's so stupid. It's so such a good joke.

(40:34):
Come on, man, it's amazing, but it's so stupid. I
love it. It's so that's a well, it's so bad.
That's such a good joke. That's a good dad joke.
It's a great dad joke and a very surreal thing.
Yeah all right, So, um cold shower, we learned that
the two senior citizens have syphilists, which is a real thing.
Even at the time of the airing, I'm sure we

(40:55):
had the stat right that STDs because of um drugs
like Sallis and UH and viagra. Seniors can now have
sex a lot longer, and at least when this show aired,
the stat was three rise in SCD amongst seniors. Um,
because they're all banging in nursing homes. I'm gonna say

(41:16):
something right now. I hope this is true. It is true.
I hope this is true. Yeah, why not? Why? I
hope that when Casey and I are in the home
sixties and seventies and our kids aren't taking care of us,
because you know they're not gonna don't say sixties. I
think this is supposed to be like eight even though
even though for some reason the woman is supposed to

(41:38):
be in the sixties, I think it's it's reads more
accurately like eighties. Well, listen, whenever it is. I'm just
saying this. I'm in an old age home. You're not
in an old age home at sixty normally, Jo scrubs
you are. I guess for some reason they decided to
make that woman sixty. I don't know why, but she
was sixty eight. Okay, But whatever it is, when I'm

(41:58):
in whenever it is, and Casey and I God willing,
please healthy, live still together. I hope, I pray that
we are banging like those two. I'm a feeling you won't.
I'm a feeling you won't need sattist or viagra. I
think you'll you'll probably still be going strong. I hope
and I pray you're right on that one as well.

(42:21):
Todd Enters wearing a Gulf T shirt. Yes, kudos does
forgetting a Gulf T shirt on NBC in prime time.
Do you think NBC knew at the time. I think
he didn't. They had no idea what a Gulf T shirt. Many,
just like all the radio stations didn't know. Skeet skeet,
skeet man. He said, I hear there's a he said,

(42:41):
I hear there's a steel Magnolian room nine. He really
is open to any and all types of partners. Yeah,
I thought the end was bar scene was really moved.
I found myself with a big smile across my face.

(43:02):
It was my wife didn't see the My wife didn't
see the first part where she said she was planning it.
I had to explain that to her and when she
saw it, and Elliott does the oh my god, yes,
I mean yes, oh my god, yes, and she goes, oh,
and I said, well in the beginning of the show,

(43:23):
but Sarah still out of it even though the audience
knew was coming. And it was really sweet. I love
the way it was filmed and um. And then of
course it ends with Jad with tears in his eyes
and he realizes that he doesn't have any feelings for Melody,

(43:43):
that seeing this makes him realize he still has feelings
for Elliott. And it ends with him in a in
a cold shower. Oh, it was really clever. Oh'm sorry,
I'm skipping one of the most important beats that you
finally come around to JD's fantasy of what would be
like to Elliott and he's so happy and love and
he says, I love you. I'm so happy that you're

(44:04):
my wife. And it's the simplest of fantasies. Also, like
all the other fantasies were so elaborate, like Cox kills
Elliott you know, also sits across all down a law
table I hate yeah, I know, um and all Judy Judy,
Carla makes out Yeah Carla, what do they say that, Like,

(44:24):
let's just get wine and go shoe shopping or something. Yeah,
and then we can have we could have sensual something like,
you know, cuddly sex and yeah yeah, and then yeah,
tender sex or something like that. Good episode. Very good, yeah,
very good. Well, we have a guest today, we do
all right, We're gonna take a break, everybody, and when

(44:45):
we come back, fuck your sound effects machine. We're gonna
have a guest and it's gonna be fun and laughter.
We'll be right back for what you're trying to get
it all right out? Yes, go ahead? Donald, tell us

(45:08):
about her caller. You organ you. I think this is
the first time you've organized the caller when it came
into the group shot. I I double checks to make
sure I was in the right text chain. Yeah, but
Donald organized today's caller. Go ahead, Donald. So we went
to the z I said it earlier. We went to
the Zombies three premiere. We took the kids, We took
the girl Wilder, she loves the movie. And so while

(45:32):
there we found out that the lead of the movie
is actually Cameron Mannheim's son, Milo Mannheim. And we found
this out because Cameron came up and introduced herself to
us and offered, you know, would you like to meet
to my kids? Would you like to meet my son?
He's the star of the movie, and in doing so,

(45:53):
she introduced me to her nephew, who's a surgeon who's
a fan of Scrubs who actually listens to the podcast.
But he does something that's pretty unique, like he's like
a I don't know what it's exactly called. It's like
a robotic technician or something like surgeon. Yeah, let's find
out what it is. You can talk show, dude, you know,

(46:16):
like a BA spoke some jazz maybe talking about the episode.
So come on, let's get the show. Give it up.
But Noah, Si, I know. H Hey, Zach, Hey, Donald,

(46:39):
Welcome to the podcast, sir, welcome, Welcome. It is such
a pleasure to be here. It's really a pleasure to
meet both of you, guys. I'm just sorry we meet already. Bro.
I can see the whole story on how we met man,
and you just made it look like we didn't meet.
Calm down on the show. He means on the show. Donald,
that's correct, on the show. Now, I'm just so happy
that you're a real You're a surgeon, correct, I am

(47:01):
a real surgeon and you listen to the podcast, which
makes me very happy. Anytime I stumble across people in
the real world that listen. I'm so excited, but particularly
a real surgeon. We're lucky to have you on the show,
and thank you for listening. Well, thank you guys so much.
You know, growing up, you know, everyone has um you know,

(47:22):
certain shows that kind of give them guidance into what
they're supposed to do. And when you apply for medical school,
one of the things that caution you against is saying,
you know, I watched this medical trauma and that got
me involved. And Scrubs was the show that I had to,
you know, bite my lip and say I didn't watch
this and it didn't influence me into going into medicine.
It must be kind of interesting for you, guys, because

(47:43):
there must be a lot of people like me watching
your show growing up. You know, uh, somehow gotten pushed
in that direction because of you too. Yeah, we run
into that all the time, and well when we always
feel so honored that that we did that or you know,
indirectly we did that, and I have to say, it's
just it's just we keep hearing for years we've heard

(48:04):
and I hope you'll attest that this is true that
of all the medical shows, even though Scrubs was the
most bizarre and wacky that it's the most medically accurate
of what the lifestyle is like in terms of training
in residency and the interactions that happen. That's absolutely true.
I mean there's, uh, there's far more or less you know, uh,
sex in the broom closet and scrubs and far more

(48:26):
you know interdepartmental dynamics, and there isn't say, you know,
Gray's anatomy. Err So, um, I absolutely if you're saying
there's no sex in the broom closet, in in uh,
in the real world, you know, maybe I did not
do residency right, simp take simptake simptells, simp take. Tell

(48:50):
us what you're what you actually do, Donaldson, You're a
you have a specialty in the heart in the cardiac world,
so it's it's not cardiac. I do robotics, So I
do robotic variatric surgery, and robotic surgery is an extension
of laparoscopic surgery. There is a I know that your
character Turk talks a lot about doing laparoscopy at different

(49:11):
points during the show, and when you guys were filming scrubs,
robotics really hadn't come into its own as a field
yet and so it's the sort of the next evolution
of laparoscity. And so when you're doing laparoscopic surgery, you
make small incisions in people's bellies and you stick instruments in,
you blow up their abdomens, you have room to operate,
and then you basically have multiple graspers or cutting devices
to do your operation. With the robot, you attach those

(49:33):
devices to a you know, a robotic machine that allows
you to both see in three dimensions, magnify your motions,
and then the instruments are significantly more complex, so you
have many more degrees of freedom in terms of how
you move, and so the learning curve is much faster
and you can be significantly more precise. And so I

(49:54):
knew pretty early on when I saw the robot for
the first time that this is how I sort of
wanted to participate the medical field and be a surgeon.
And I was able to, you know, through a pretty
circuitous path, achieved that. I initially wanted to be a urologist.
Um and uh, you know, they do kidneys and then
you know, penile reconstruction and that kind of thing. Um.
But because they were the first doctors that really use

(50:16):
the robot, And since then the robot has become uh,
you know, embraced by multiple other fields, including what I
currently do now, which is bariatrics, which is weight loss surgery,
and it's just going to continue to grow. Um there's
a second, just one second. So weight loss surgery mean
tying off stomachs. So uh, there's multiple types of weight
loss surgeries. So there's surgeries where you just remove a

(50:38):
portion of the stomach and that helps people both eat
less and then has some hormonal effects. And then there's
a variety of weight loss surgeries where you essentially replumb
the GI tract and move around portions to the intestine
to have you know, less intestine to absorb food. You
can treat things like diabetes. Patients who under go bariatric
surgery have significant health improvements and all kinds of problems

(50:59):
like hypert engine diabetes, and it's also been shown to
improve cancer risks. So it's about to say popular, I
was about to ask you, Okay, if you're able to
rearrange and shorten the intestines and stuff like that, how
would this do against intestinal cancer and colon colorectal cancer

(51:19):
and stuff like that. So the actual surgery itself isn't
really what reduces cancer risk. It's the weight loss that
goes along with it. And so we just we know
that patients who suffer from obesity, as their BMIs get higher,
there are higher rates of cancer associated with that, and
so by reversing that, we're able to bring those rates

(51:40):
of cancer down. And that's kind of a newer benefit
that we're just showing. And has we come out in
some of the more current research. Are people still doing
the thing where they tie off the stomach or has
that become less common? Well, there's a lap band, isn't
it called lap band? So I was wondering wake about.
The lap band was very popular in about twenty ten.
I don't know if you remember driving around Lost Angelists
at that time, but everywhere you look there was a

(52:02):
billboard for you know, lose the weight um and I
just remember learning that people could actually eat, like through
it right or like push it off or something. So
that's one of the problems with the lab band. It
had two major issues. One is that you're putting a
foreign body into the around the stomach, and so it
can slip, it can erode, it can cause problems like
reflux or nausea. And the other problem is that the

(52:23):
mechanism it works is it's just supposed to reduce your
appetite by constricting the stomach. Most other bariatric surgeries have
some component of hormonal changes associated with them as well.
So for patients who had the lap band, they could
lose a certain percentage of weight, but many had problems
and many gained it back. Um. Probably about thirty or
forty percent of patients who had them did well, and
we're really happy with their results, but a lot of

(52:44):
them ended up getting second surer. So that's not so.
That's sorry, darn onemore, that's so that's not in favor
anymore now. It's now it's reducing the size of the
stomach or the large intestines. So bariatric surgeries an area
where lots of people have very strong opinions, And so
there are people who was still be doing the lap
band um, but it's being done with far less regularity
that was done ten years ago. The most common sleep

(53:07):
surgery to marathis called the sleeve gastrectomy, where you stample
off about eighty percent of the stomach. But people are
also doing things like gastric bypass and other types of
bypass surgeries as well. Go ahead, don wow, what's the
one that's there's one that it wasn't the lap band?
That's I know a few people died from trying to

(53:30):
us Yeah, yeah, through surgery. Um was the lap band
is the one that's really dangerous though also there's a
risk in doing any of this obviously, but that was
the one that I don't want to freaking get in trouble.
I don't want to get sued by lap band. Well, good,
we got a surgeon here. You can answer your question.
Go ahead. So the lap band was relatively safe the

(53:53):
more the mortality wasn't really the big problem. It had
to do with either eroding into the stomach slipping. Bariatric
surgery is a long history of trial and error, and
early on people would the first surgeries, they basically bypassed,
you know, eighty five percent of the intestine and plugged
the remainder the intestine back in and only gave you
aout one hundred centimeters to absorb, and patients had all

(54:15):
kinds of nutritional deficiencies. The probably the most dangerous surgery
that's being currently done in America, not that it's dangerous,
but that it has the most possible side effects is
called the duity'll switch, and you're basically removing about half
of the intestine further down and so you don't have
that to absorb, and if you don't take the appropriate vitamins,

(54:37):
then patients can have massive nutritional deficiencies that can be fatal,
and so some of those have come into the news.
But in general, bariatric surgeries, if you have a good
program and you follow along with you know, a good nutritionist,
are very safe. Do you think robotics are going to
be used in more and more surgeries. I mean we'll

(55:00):
come to a point where everything's done through a small
incision and robotics. I think there's always going to be
room for open surgeries. There are many times where things
are too stuck, or you just don't have the robot
available where that or it's absolutely necessary to know how
to do that. Right now, across all fields, people are

(55:21):
using the robot for elective surgery, meaning not for emergencies,
and slowly we're finding ways to do more emergence surgeries
that way. But there's always going to be a need
for someone who knows how to make a big bin
line incision and stop bleeding or take their control contamination.
That being said, I think the robot's going to continue
to grow. Some of the major barriers to entry are

(55:44):
cost and then training of personnel. So the system itself
costs about a million and a half dollars, and then
you know there's about two or three hundred thousand dollars
a maintenance a year, and it requires a whole set
of training, not just for the surgeons who do it,
but for everyone else in the o R to know
how to exchange the instruments and maintain the system, and
so it required you know, it's those are major barriers

(56:07):
to entry, but at the same time, you can be
so precise, and the operative experience is so excellent that
there's been a real push to adoption and they're sorry,
how long do you think until it's doing the procedure itself.
That's I'm thinking about like autopilot and a plane, where
where the pilot is taking off and then he's hitting

(56:30):
on a pilot because you know, the robot's gonna he's
gonna monitor the robot, but the robot's gonna fly more
accurately than a human being ever could um. Obviously with
the monitoring of a human being. Well, do you think
something analogous will happen in the surgery world where where
you're saying like, hey, hey do this, but I'm gonna
I'm gonna watch you to make sure you don't suck up.

(56:50):
But but your but your accuracy as a as a
computer could be better than a humans ever could. I
hope that doesn't really happen in the next thirty years
because that might be of my career, but it's it's
gonna happen at some point. So they've already created robot
that can do things like close skin together better than
any human can. Um. The thing with surgery is that

(57:12):
it's not so much about the technical skill, although that's
absolutely essential. It's every single thing you do is a
separate decision, and making those decisions requires lots of expertise.
And so I think it's going to be a while
before we have a robot that can go in interpret
someone's in natity, find out what the problem is, uh,

(57:32):
and then execute the right series of steps in order
to do it. I may be able to tell a robot,
you know, close this incision here and then walk away.
But I feel I think, yeah, exactly, but I think
I'm probably secure over the next twenty or thirty years.
But you do believe that's that's that's nanotech is on
a horizon, bro. It has to be that's what has

(57:55):
to be. Well, I'm thinking. I'm thinking little tiny, little, tiny, tiny,
tiny tiny, like the Inner Space, like Iron Man. Do
you remember Inner Space? I do remember Interspace one of
my favorite movies ever, A great movie. Dennis Quaid, Did
you Go Inside? They shrink him down, so it's just
like a miss frizzled situation. I'm pretty well versed, but

(58:17):
I have not shrink. You're way shrink. They shrank Dennis
Quaid down to the size of a freaking molecule almost,
and inject him into Martin Short. Yeah, and wackiness ensues.
That's when it all goes. All craziness happened. Listen. That's
where and Meg Ryan met Short. Do you watch the Boys?

(58:43):
Do you watch the Boys? I've seen Dennis Quaid's son
The Boys. Yeah, that's Meg Ryan's son too. Guess where
they met when making Inner Space? It all comes full circle. Noah, well,
there we go. You're bringing it back. Martin Short is
so funny. I've been watching Only Murder, Only Murder in
the Building. Oh yeah, Zach I started it and it's
so good. It's fun right, but Martin Short like he

(59:06):
just I just cut to him and I laugh. I
just find him so funny. Did you ever see Three Amigos?
Of course you've seen three Amigo I've seen three amideo
scrap film. And did you ever see the Santa Claus
three where he plays Uh, he's yeah, he's Jack Frost.

(59:29):
Well I'm liking I'm liking Only Murders in the Building
and he's very funny. It took me twenty five years
to realize that The Santa Claus was a fun Yeah. Yeah, yeah,
yeah yeah if you were twenty five years old when
you found out. Huh. I watched the movie when I
was swelled, and twenty five years later I was like, oh,
Claus things, yeah, and you're a doctor, right yeah yeah,

(59:54):
well thank you? No, no, do you have any questions
for us? Oh? Yeah, even qu for us. I'd love
to ask you guys a couple. So one of them
has to do with my favorite thing about the show,
which was your relationship with each other and sort of
your romance. Um, how how did you guys decide to
sort of uh, you know, focus and highlight on that

(01:00:15):
so much, given that at the time that wasn't something
that was emphasized in pop culture. I think it was.
It was a combination of Bill had written it, you know,
based on French his friendships, um, and then Donald and
I took it and ran with it. Um. You know, Bill,
it's funny. I was just working with him this week
and now he's become a hugger. You know. It took

(01:00:37):
twenty years. He wasn't even he wrote these characters, but
like he'd still like stick out his hand and like Bill, no,
we're hugging, and um, So I think he created these characters.
And then the magical thing happened that Donald and I
really truly became as close as the characters in real life.
And then he just started taking stories from our own
life and making them that and we would improv you know,

(01:00:59):
as it was easy easy for us to improv as
the guys because they were very similar to who we were. Yeah. Yeah,
Turk and JD definitely broke down a lot of my
own homophobia issues, you know what I mean, like having
to do a lot of the things that we did. Definitely,
you know it's all Look, I love you no matter what.

(01:01:21):
If your life was on the line and I needed
to do something to save you, I would do that
for you. I'm so confused. You put your penis in
them if they needed it for their Absolutely, that's what
I would coding. He's coding we needed giant cock is
signed him. You would do that for you. Yeah, in

(01:01:42):
a heartbeat, Thank you baby, and doctor? Does that ever
come up in the medical field quickly, meaning a penis
in someone's re I mean, as I said, I didn't
spend very much time inside the you know, the broom
closets residences that experience. They just wondered if there was
any situation that you are where like quick, we need

(01:02:03):
a fallus in his rectum. Well, I can tell you
that my second day of residency. So you know, I'm
forty hours in, I walk in, I'm on call, and
my senior goes, I've got to wrectum for you to disimpact.
So literally, like I walk into work and twenty minutes later,
I've got um, you know, ankle or I guess, you know,

(01:02:23):
like wrist deep and some guy's asked trying to take it,
you know, dis impact some constipated stool. Yeah, okay, that's
what I was going to ask you. So what do
you give me notice plugs? Yeah? Like how does that work? Like,
so you got to go up there and you got
to be professional. How do you not in your mind say,
oh my god, I'm one fisting this dude. Yeah, Like
that's more like wearing him like a hand puppet, right, Like,

(01:02:43):
how do you not? How do you not? That's the
first thing. And then two, I'm actually pulling his dudoo
out of him? Now is it a dudoo clog? Is
that the problem? Like there's too much dudo in its clog?
Whether impacted, they have a they basically have a stool
ball that's so horror stoolball out there rectum so it's
too big, and then you take it. You have to

(01:03:04):
reach in there and pull out the stoolball. You basically
turn your finger and they're like it becomes a popsicle.
You kind of do you ever? Do you ever? Do
you ever like try and swish it like a three
to the garbage? I can't say that I have the
rules of dis impaction though art you're never supposed to

(01:03:25):
make eye contact with the patient. Once you start um
because it could be sexual. If you live you're looking
at each other, it could be sexual. I mean, it's
already awkward for them, it's kind of awkward for you.
As you were saying, you're doing everything you can to
maintain your professionalism. That's what I'm trying to say. Like
you're being the doctor, you have a license to you

(01:03:45):
have a license to see things that you wouldn't necessarily
see normally, like like one, the inside of people, right,
you wouldn't normally get to see those things that too.
Always found it awkward when your doctor's like, all right,
let me see your stuff. Now, I know they're being
professional and automatically I'm like, yeah, sure, here's my ship,

(01:04:06):
there's my jump, you know what I mean. But truth
in the truth of the matter, we're so caught up
in it in other situations, like I would never do
that in front of you know, a bunch of people
out of nowhere, because I don't want to. You're prepared.
You know when you're gonna get your physical that you're
gonna at some point drop your drawers and at some
point bend over and let him digitally penetrate you. Yes,

(01:04:31):
do you know that I have to have my first
colonoscopy doctor, and I I've never had after forty five, right,
So exactly, they moved the guidelines up five years. So
Donald Donald has had his. But I'm talking to the doctor.
I'm talking to him before because he's I haven't had
it yet. I think it's coming up this week. And

(01:04:53):
he says he's asking these questions and he goes, I'm
gonna do an endoscopy as well, um, for X y
Z reasons. And I thought I was being clever and
I said, don't use the same camera. And he said,
do you know how many people make that joke? And
I was like, oh, I thought I was being original.

(01:05:14):
Well was courtesy? You couldn't give me a courtesy? Laugh? Doc?
You know, well, you know it's um, it's always a
scary experience for your first time. Uh. The one thing
that you know you should take solace in is that
it's July. So that means there's gonna be a whole
fresh new crop crop of interns and residents starting. So

(01:05:36):
you know you maybe someone's first colonoscopy. No, no, no,
he well maybe assisting, but I know the guy who's
doing it, he's he's going to be operating the camera. Okay,
now they give you propo phil right now. I was
that I remember um coming out of because I have
had an endoscopy before and I was weaking. I couldn't

(01:05:57):
stop talking. Does that happen a lot and people are
coming out of pro feel like speaking? Well, yeah, I
had that, h know I'm talking about Like I was
just talking. I was like, doct, this feels so good,
Like what is this drug? Like? Okay, so then he
doc told me that Like I don't know if he
was joking or not, but he said maybe it wasn't
propo phil, but he said, this is the drug the
CIA used to use, see I used to use on
people because they just couldn't stop talking. They were just

(01:06:19):
like this spilling their guts like I don't so they
may have been using a different drug on you. It
might have been ketamine. And people tend to often speak
when they when they come out of kenemine polls um.
I was in a dude, he put me in a khole.
Probably went out parting. I remember telling him. I remember
I couldn't stop talking. I was like, Doc, this feels

(01:06:40):
so good, Like would you ever want to like hang
out with me in my breasts. So you know those
things you can think back that you said that in
like you cringe. Well, on my list is like on
whatever drug, can't stop talking, asking the doctor to bring
this drug and hang out with me and my friends.
Oh dude, I said somebody I said I have for

(01:07:00):
my colonoscopy. I have one of the most cringeworthy uh
statements ever said to a doctor on the drug. On
the drug, before the note, before the drug, before the drug,
the rug. He's about to put the drug in me,
and I look at him, I go, tell me when
you put it in, because I want to feel it. Cringe, cringe,

(01:07:22):
meaning I want to be high for that split. I
want to feel the high. Second it does feel great,
but before I'm in dharma dar arm, before I go
there freaking. But I gotta say when I felt it
for the endoscopy. There's like a split a couple of
seconds where you're like, oh, this must people like heroin
or feels like or something, because this is amazing. And

(01:07:45):
then I was like, tell me, I remember saying that
to him, and then after saying that, being like, damn,
I sound like a fucking addict, and he's like, it's
in you and I was like, yeah, it is um
all right, we gotta wrap it up. Donald Phaison, No, Noah,

(01:08:07):
You've been an amazing guest. Thank you for educating us.
Everyone go get your colonoscope. If you're if you're forty
five and above, and if you're lucky before the robots
take over, yeah maybe if well, if you're unlucky and
you get lucky enough to have a surgeon like Noah
and his robot and his R two unit, yeah, operate

(01:08:27):
on you do you name it? Did you name the robot?
So the robots way we work are named after the
Wally movie. So we have Evie and Wally. There's there's
two of the robots. I love that movie. Great movie actually, Wally, Wally, Eva, Wally.

(01:08:48):
All Right, everybody, thank you for tuning in. We love
you so much. And jva Za any last thoughts, Donald
phaise On, Wally Joel, any last thoughts? No, have a
great Oh wait, I do want to say something, Okay,
go ahead. Wait, So somebody asked me, can is there

(01:09:10):
a place where you can find the sheet music for
I'm no Superman and I'm coming to use Zach because
you have a relationship with the band laz Lobang. If
we could find a way to get that out there, maybe,
you know, that would be kind of cool. It would

(01:09:30):
be kind of interesting to hear different people's interpretation of
I'm Superman, but the but with the actual uh, the
chords or the piano music. I think they will be
looking for the piano, all right, I will I will
inquire about that and remind hey, I want to talk
to you about, um, some of a Llama Day's music

(01:09:51):
because I got you. I think I might I might
be able to put it in a scene I'm in
which I just directed call them up. Um. All right, fans, friends, guests,
we love you, have a beautiful week. We'll see you
next time. Five, six, seven, eight. Stories about Sure we
made about a bunch of doctor nurses in the Canada

(01:10:14):
who learned him. He said, here's the stories Ntell should know.
So gather around you.