Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys
online at Advocateslaw dot com.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Jasmine is on the phone today for a first day
follow up and she's getting ghosted by a dude named Ryan.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
So in a few minutes, we're gonna call him.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
See if he'll tell us why he's ghosting her and
maybe get her another date if she still wants one.
But first, Jasmine, how long has it been since you
heard from Ryan?
Speaker 4 (00:21):
It's been a week, okay, So have you reached out
to him? And that week about how many times do
you think.
Speaker 5 (00:27):
I've reached out to him embarrassingly partly over twenty times?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Yeah, okay, that's a lot. Don't be embarrassed.
Speaker 4 (00:34):
I mean, I mean, I think that we can all
say that that ghosting is definitely happening here.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Then yeah, unless he lost his phone.
Speaker 5 (00:41):
Yeah, but like who can survive without a phone nowadays?
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Totally true.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
What were the twenty texts or calls?
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Like, what did you say?
Speaker 5 (00:52):
Yeah, well, I basically it was it was like more
than twenty calls and then just a text has just
been kind of like kind of just kind of writing
paragraphs only because him and I basically met, we spoke
on this app and then before a meeting, we were
just he was like hyping me up and just it
(01:14):
was almost like love bombing, to be honest, now that
I think about it, and now that I've spoken to
my friends on it, but he kind of promised me
a lot of things, and I guess I was just
being really vulnerable. But before we met, he was telling
me how pretty I was, and we were going to
go to this place and we're going to go to
(01:34):
that place. And then when I met him, he was
so incredible, so like everything I could even ask for
I checked off, Like I don't ever, I don't even
know if people have a check box list. I don't,
but if I were to have one, he's definitely that
that person. And he was witty, which is what I
(01:57):
love so much. Yeah, when we met at this top
bugs bar, and I was just super excited about everything.
He paid for the check of course, you know, like
any gentleman would, and yeah, I asked him if he
was okay after that and absolutely nothing. So before then
before we were the day, everything we're just like so
(02:19):
many checks. It was like a lot. Like I said,
it was like love bombing. And then we go on
to date and it's the greatest time of my life.
And then I was like okay, like you know, I
was going to wait to see if he wanted to
go ahead and give me a call, because that's like
what you do. But he took too long. I was
like hey, like are you okay? And then I was
(02:43):
just like thanks for the night. And then after that,
I've just been like, what's going on?
Speaker 4 (02:48):
So while you were on the date at the restaurant,
it was so perfect, like can you tell us about that?
What were the conversations like, like what did you guys do?
Speaker 5 (02:56):
Yeah, So it was it was like NonStop, like talked
about our future together. He was talking about he was
talking about going to like Papo, going to like like meet.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
His parents say that. I would wonder what was going
on too, But also it'd be kind of flaggy to
hear somebody start talking.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
That so soon. Yeah, did you.
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Do or say anything on the date that may have
I don't know, altered the course of this marriage.
Speaker 5 (03:25):
I mean, I mean maybe I like appeared too eager
because he's like, yeah, like we'll meet like my parents.
I can't wait to show you like my grandparents too.
And I was just like maybe like I said, like,
yes too, Hick, that is a lot.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Yeah, I mean to go that far right, Yeah, And then.
Speaker 5 (03:40):
Now I just think maybe he's like he wasn't attracted
to me or something, and maybe I should have like
warnted certent dress but I don't look basic. But I
was like, I feel like I picked the perfect dress,
like you know, like when you ask like your girlfriends
when you're going out, and I did. Yeah. Now I
feel kind of insecure and just not okay with the
right selection that I even picked on my dress.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
There be anything about you at all.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
I mean, I understand turning to yourself like what's wrong
with me and doing the superficial like clothing and stuff
like that, but there's a really good chance it has
nothing to do with any of that.
Speaker 5 (04:11):
But like, first date impressions are everything too, you know,
like when I like, when you wear like a red
dress that makes a big statement that maybe I should
have just formed that one, and I just I wore
a regular black dress. And I think that like a
guy probably in the first date wants like a red
statement piece dress.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
As a guy who's been on dates before, I don't
think I would care black or red as long as
you're wearing something or not. Abody on where we meet.
But you know, I don't think. Yeah, I don't know
the color of it. But hey, who knows. Everybody's different. Okay, Okay,
plays don't come back. Get your first date follow up.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
Next first Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury
Attorneys online at Advocates Law dot com if you're.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Just joining us for today's first date follow up. Jasmine
is on the phone and she's getting ghosted by Ryan.
So we're about to call him and see if he'll
tell us why he's ghosting her and see if she
still wants another date after she hears the reason. But
things moved pretty quickly. Jasmine, give a real quick recap
for everybody who's just joining us on your situation with Ryan.
Speaker 5 (05:15):
Okay, so I feel like this isn't your regular like
ghost story. I mean, like this guy sent me flowers
before our date. He told me he wanted he told
me we wanted to travel together, that I can meet
his parents, he paid for the bill. Everything was good,
good conversation, and now I absolutely haven't heard from him.
(05:36):
And it went from so many messages of flowers to
my door and now I don't even get a peep nothing.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
I would want to know. Yeah, I would definitely want
to know what's going on. All right, Well you ready
for us to call him?
Speaker 5 (05:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Here we go. Hello, Hi, I speak to Ryan. Please.
This is Ryan Ryan. How are you man? My name
is Jubil from a radio show called The Jebel Show. Hi, Ryan,
whole show's here. I'm Nina. Hi, I'm Victoria.
Speaker 6 (06:14):
Well, okay, what's up?
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Have you ever listened to the show before?
Speaker 5 (06:19):
I have? Oh?
Speaker 6 (06:20):
Cool?
Speaker 3 (06:22):
No, Ryan, we're.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
Calling you because you went on a date with somebody
and you haven't called them back.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Okay, So I'm not sure if you've.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Ever heard a first date follow up before, but that's
the segment where if you go out with someone and
then ghost them, they ask us to call you and
ask why. So we got an email about you from Jasmine. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
do you mind telling us about why you're ghosting Jasmine?
Speaker 7 (06:47):
Well, Jasmine's great, we have a really cool date. She
is attractive, lovely. But you know what I have come
to learn about myself that I am I have a
lot of momentum in the romance department, and I need
to cool the jets more often, and so I have
(07:08):
decided for myself, no matter how good it's going. You know,
as we're texting and talking beforehand, in the first five minutes, irl,
if I don't feel something discernible, it's spark. I got
to cut it off because I've gone down that road
too many times hoping that would come because everything else
seems so good. And then I'm months into a relationship
(07:31):
and want you know, I just I'm too much of
a romantic, so I need to I needed to draw.
Speaker 5 (07:36):
Okay, wait, I don't like okay, okay, sorry, but it's
kind of really refreshing to even hear your voice. But
at the same time, now I'm kind of just like
I'm really just in shock and taken by everything. If
you're such a romantic and all of this stuff, wouldn't
you have been polite to just send me a text
back or call back and be polite, have, you know,
(07:58):
like just and communicate let me know what's going on,
instead of just leaving me out in the dark like that.
That's really disrespectful. I honestly want to like curse your
head off right now, but like I'm not going to
just because I'm actually polite. I don't understand why you
couldn't have just sent a message. You can go ahead
and send flowers before, but you can't go ahead and
(08:19):
send a message after our lovely date that we had
because you didn't feel as dark, right, And.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
That's Jasmine's been. She's on the phone and wants.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
To talk to you.
Speaker 7 (08:29):
I got that.
Speaker 5 (08:31):
You're so much a romantic, Like, what do you mean?
How are you such a romantic? I hope everybody knows
who this guy is and honestly doesn't want to be
with you, because you should be a little bit more
upfront if you're a romantic, have common turtesty.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
My biggest question for you, Ryan, though, is what made
you want to buy somebody flowers before you met them
and talked about family and all those types of things,
and then like what changed in the moment where you
felt comfortable doing that and meeting her in real life?
Speaker 5 (09:02):
Well, that is such a coward move to not even
respond back to me.
Speaker 7 (09:07):
I'm sorry, I'm just I'm also pretty non confrontational and
I don't like ghosting, but it has become a fact
in our generation that that's just how people handle it.
So I thought it was better than me explaining all
this stuff to you about my rule.
Speaker 5 (09:21):
Yeah, but being romantic is being vulnerable and having courage
and all of that. So I don't even think that's
what you are. I think you're actually like a narcissist,
to be honest, if you're going to go ahead and
like this is like, honestly just unbelievable. You shouldn't love
bomb people like that. You shouldn't. You shouldn't do that.
I wish you luck and.
Speaker 7 (09:39):
And somebody I hear its I was embarrassed that I
went so far before we even met, and so I
just know your coward responder like double back from that.
Speaker 5 (09:50):
Okay, Yeah, well I really hope you learn your lesson
and don't pull such a coward and move on the
next person that you try and find a spark with,
because I could mentally mess with people honestly, Like my
friends aren't even enough now, Like having to see a
therapist after this is like where it's leading to, Like
it's a little ridiculous. You should like don't. You can't
do that stuff. I'm trying to find the love of
(10:11):
my life here, the person that I'm supposed to be with.
I think that's what everybody's job is and that's what
they're trying to do, and you're going over here and
then just like, oh, let me just like fake bretend
and love bomb you and all this stuff, and then
just like stop and not talk to you, like what
are you doing with your life as a man?
Speaker 4 (10:26):
Okay, I'm sorry. I have to jump in again really quick, Jasmine.
You're right, you shouldn't be ghosting you and all that stuff.
And if you're in therapy, I think that that's wonderful.
But that's not entirely his fault.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
How I think that, like, what if you were in
my position? What if you were like ghosted like that?
I don't think you understand.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
No, actually I do. I completely understand. I have been
in your position. It's more about the relationship.
Speaker 5 (10:49):
I'm sure. I'm just kind of hurt right now in
the situation, and it's just like I didn't expect him
to even answer.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
I get that. We'll just leave it there, Jasmine.
Speaker 7 (10:58):
I want to be really clear. I think you're amazing.
I had a great time with you. It was it
was me after our date processing this and realizing, you
know what, I had gone too far and I didn't
feel something that I wanted to feel before I proceeded,
and you deserved better communication about that. But that that
those are the facts, and I didn't want to lead
you on or any further whatever.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Ryan, would you like to go on another date with Jasmine?
We'll pay for it.
Speaker 5 (11:23):
I would like to go on another date with you, Ryan.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Oh wait, what you would?
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 6 (11:28):
I would, absolutely you would. Okay, y, yeah, what what?
I'm busy tonight, but I do have a friend who
I swear I just I say, you came to mind,
but we went out.
Speaker 5 (11:43):
I thank you guys.
Speaker 7 (11:44):
Actually I can put you in Tosh I swear.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
No.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Oh that's nice.
Speaker 5 (11:51):
Really okay? Cool?
Speaker 3 (11:53):
All right, Well, thank you guys. Seems like it worked out.
Speaker 7 (11:58):
Thank you, all right.
Speaker 6 (11:58):
Cool.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Jubile's first day follow up powered by the Advocates Injury
Attorney Online at advocateslave dot com.