Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys
online at Advocates Law dot com.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Jasmine is on the phone today for a first date
follow up and she's getting ghosted by a dude named Ryan.
So in a few minutes, we're gonna call him see
if he'll tell us why he's ghosting her and maybe
get her another date if she still wants one. But first, Jasmine,
how long has it been since you heard from Ryan?
It's been a week, okay, So have you reached out
to him? And that week about how many times.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
Do you think I've reached out to him? Embarrassingly? Probably
over twenty times.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Yeah, okay, that's a lot. Don't be embarrassed. I mean,
I mean, I think that.
Speaker 4 (00:36):
We can all say that that ghosting is definitely happening here.
Then yeah, unless he lost his phone.
Speaker 3 (00:41):
Yeah, both, Like who can survive without a phone nowadays?
Speaker 5 (00:45):
That's true.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
What were the twenty texts or calls?
Speaker 5 (00:50):
Like, what did you say?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
Yeah, well, I basically it was it was like more
than twenty calls and then just a text. Has just
been kind of like I kind of just been kind
of writing paragraphs only because him and I basically met
we spoke on this app and then before a meeting,
we were just he was like hyping me up and
(01:13):
just it was almost like love bombing, to be honest,
now that I think about it, and now that I've
spoken to my friends on it, but he kind of
promised me a lot of things, and I guess I
was just being really vulnerable. But before we met, he
was telling me how pretty I was, and we were
going to go to this place and we're going to
(01:34):
go to that place. And then when I met him,
he was so incredible, so like everything I could even
ask for I checked off, Like I don't ever, I
don't even know if people have to check box list.
I don't, but if I were to have one, he's
definitely that person. And he was witty, which is what
(01:57):
I love so much. Yeah, when we met at this
top bugs bar, and I was just super excited about everything.
He paid for the check of course, you know, like
any gentleman would, and yeah, I asked him if she
was okay after that and absolutely nothing. But before then
before we were the day, everything we're just like so
(02:19):
many checks. It was like a lot. Like I said,
it was like love bombing. And then we go on
this date and it's the greatest time of my life.
And then I was like okay, like you know, I
was going to wait to see if he wanted to
go ahead and give me a call, because that's like
what you do. But he took too long. I was
like hey, like are you okay? And then I was
(02:43):
just like thanks for the night. And then after that,
I've just been like, what's going on?
Speaker 4 (02:48):
So while you were on the date at the restaurant,
it was so perfect, Like can you tell us about that?
What were the conversations like, like what did you guys do?
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Yeah, So it was it was like NonStop, like talked
about our future together. He was talking about he was
talking about going to like Papo, going to like like
meet his parents.
Speaker 5 (03:09):
That's superad.
Speaker 4 (03:10):
Yeah, that I would wonder what was going on, but
also it'd be kind of flaggy to hear somebody start talking.
Speaker 5 (03:16):
That way so soon.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
Yeah, did you do or say anything on the date
that may have I don't know, altered the course of
this marriage.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
I mean, I mean maybe I like appeared too eager
because he's like, yeah, like we'll meet like my parents.
I can't wait to show you like my grandparents too.
And I was just like maybe, like I said, like, yes,
too quick.
Speaker 5 (03:37):
That is a lot to go that far, right, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
And then now I just think maybe he's like he
wasn't attracted to me or something, and maybe I should
have wanted the parent dress, but I don't look basic.
But I was like, I feel like I picked the
perfect dress, like you know, like when you ask like
your girlfriends when you're going out, and I did. Yeah.
Now I feel kind of insecure and just not okay
with the right selection that I even picked on my dress.
Speaker 5 (03:59):
Well not be anything about you at all.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
I mean, I understand turning to yourself like what's wrong
with me and doing the superficial like clothing and stuff
like that, but there's a really good chance it has
nothing to do with any of that.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
But like, first date impressions are everything too, you know,
like when I like, when you wear like a red
dress that makes a big statement that maybe I should
have just formed that one, and I just I wore
a regular black dress, and I think that like a
guy probably in the first date wants like a red
statement piece dress.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
As a guy who's been on dates before, I don't
think I would care black or red as long as
you're wearing something or not pretty on where we meet.
But you know, I don't think. Yeah, I don't know
if the color of it, but hey, who knows. Everybody's different. Okay, Okay,
plays on come back, get your first day follow up.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
Next first Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury
Attorneys online at Advocateslaw dot com.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
If you're just joining us for today's first date follow up.
Jasmine is on the phone and she's getting ghosted by Ryan.
So we're about to call him and see if he'll
tell us why he's a ghosting her and see if
she still wants another date after she hears the reason.
But things moved pretty quickly. Jasmine, give a real quick
recap for everybody who's just joining us on your situation
with Ryan.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
Okay, so I feel like this isn't your regular like
ghost story. I mean, like this guy sent me flowers
before our date. He told me he wanted he told
me we wanted to travel together, that I can meet
his parents, he paid for the bill. Everything was good,
good conversation, and now I absolutely haven't heard from him.
(05:36):
And it went from so many messages of flowers to
my door and now I don't even get a peep nothing.
Speaker 5 (05:45):
I would want to know. Yeah, I would definitely want
to know what's going on. All right, Well, you ready
for us to call him?
Speaker 3 (05:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (05:52):
Here we go, Hello him. I seeking to Ryan. Please.
Speaker 6 (06:06):
This is Ryan, Ryan.
Speaker 5 (06:07):
How are you man? My name is Jubil from a
radio show called The Jebel Show. Hi, Ryan, whole show's here.
I'm Nina. Hi, I'm Victoria.
Speaker 6 (06:14):
Well, okay, what's up?
Speaker 5 (06:16):
Have you ever listened to the show before?
Speaker 3 (06:19):
I have?
Speaker 7 (06:20):
Oh? Cool?
Speaker 2 (06:22):
No, Ryan, we're calling you because you went on a
date with somebody and you haven't called them back. Okay,
So I'm not sure if you've ever heard a first
date follow up before, but that's the segment where if
you go out with someone and then ghost them, they
ask us to call you and ask why. So we
got an email about you from Jasmine. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
(06:42):
do you mind telling us about why you're ghosting Jasmine?
Speaker 8 (06:47):
Well, Jasmine's great, we have a really cool date. She
is attractive, lovely. But you know what I have come
to learn about myself that I am I have a
lot of momentum in the romance department, and I need
to cool the jets more often. And so I have
(07:08):
decided for myself, no matter how good it's going. You know,
as we're texting and talking beforehand, in the first five minutes, irl,
if I don't.
Speaker 6 (07:18):
Feel something discernible its spark.
Speaker 8 (07:21):
I got to cut it off because I've gone down
that road too many times hoping that would come because
everything else seems so good. And then I'm months into
a relationship and one you know, I just I'm too
much of a romantic, so I need to I needed
to draw.
Speaker 3 (07:36):
Okay, wait, I don't like okay, okay, sorry, but it's
kind of really refreshing to even hear your voice. But
at the same time, now I'm kind of just like
I'm really just in shock and taken by everything. If
you're such a romantic and all of this stuff, wouldn't
you have been polite to just send me a text
back or call back and be polite, have, you know,
(07:58):
like just and communicate let me know what's going on,
instead of just leaving me out in the dark like that.
That's really disrespectful. I honestly want to like curse your
head off right now, but like I'm not going to
just because I'm actually polite. I don't understand why you
couldn't have just sent a message. You can go ahead
and send flowers before, but you can't go ahead and
(08:19):
send a message after our lovely date that we had
because you didn't feel as.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Dark, right, And that's Jasmine's been. She's on the phone
and wants to talk to you.
Speaker 6 (08:29):
I got that.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
You're so much of a romantic, Like, what do you mean?
How are you such a romantic? I hope everybody knows
who this guy is and honestly doesn't want to be
with you, because you should be a little bit more
upfront if you're a romantic, have common turtesty.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
My biggest question for you, Ryan, though, is what made
you want to buy somebody flowers before you met them
and talked about family and all those types of things,
and then like what changed in the moment where you
felt comfortable doing that and meeting her in real life?
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Well, that is such a coward move to not even
respond back to me.
Speaker 6 (09:07):
I'm sorry, I'm.
Speaker 8 (09:08):
Just I'm also pretty non confrontational and I don't like ghosting,
but it has become a fact in our generation that
that's just how people handle it. So I thought it
was better than me explaining all this stuff to you
about my rule.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Yeah, but being romantic is being vulnerable and having courage
and all of that. So I don't even think that's
what you are. I think you're actually like a narcissist,
to be honest, if you're going to go ahead and
like this is like, honestly just unbelievable. You shouldn't love
bomb people like that. You shouldn't. You shouldn't do that.
I wish you luck and and somebody I.
Speaker 8 (09:41):
Hear it, desmon, I was embarrassed that I went so
far before we even.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Met, and so I just know your howard.
Speaker 6 (09:48):
Responder like double back from that.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Okay, yeah, well I really hope you learn your lesson
and don't pull such a coward and move on the
next person that you try and find a spark with,
because I could mentally mess with people honestly, Like my
friends aren't even enough now, Like having to see a
therapist after this is like where it's leading to, like
it's a little ridiculous. You should like, don't you can't
do that stuff. I'm trying to find the love of
(10:11):
my life here as a person that I'm supposed to
be with. I think that's what everybody's job is and
that's what they're trying to do, and you're going over
here and then just like, oh, let me just like
fake pretend and love bomb you and all this stuff
and then just like stop and not talk to you,
Like what are you doing with your life as a man?
Speaker 4 (10:26):
Okay, I'm sorry. I have to jump in again really quick, Jasmine.
You're right, you shouldn't be ghosting you and all that stuff.
And if you're in therapy, I think that that's wonderful.
But that's not entirely his fault.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
How I think that, like, what if you were in
my position? What if you were like ghosted like that?
I don't think you understand.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
No, actually I do. I completely understand. I have been
in your position. It's more about the relationship.
Speaker 5 (10:49):
I'm sure.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
I'm just kind of hurt right now in the situation,
and it's just like I didn't expect him to even answer.
Speaker 5 (10:55):
I get that.
Speaker 6 (10:56):
We'll just leave it there, Jasmine.
Speaker 8 (10:58):
I want to be really clear. I think you're amazing.
I had a great time with you. It was it
was me after our date processing this and realizing, you
know what, I had gone too far and I didn't
feel something that I wanted to feel before I proceeded,
and you deserved better communication about that.
Speaker 6 (11:15):
But that that those are the facts.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
And I didn't want to lead you on or any
further whatever.
Speaker 5 (11:20):
Ryan, would you like to go on another date with Jasmine?
We'll pay for it.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
I would like to go on another date with you, Ryan.
Speaker 5 (11:25):
Oh wait, what you would? Yeah?
Speaker 7 (11:28):
I would, absolutely you would. Okay, yes, yeah, what. I'm
busy tonight, but I.
Speaker 8 (11:39):
Do have a friend who I swear I just I say,
you came to mind, but we went out. I think
you guys are actually I can put you in Tosh,
I swear.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
No.
Speaker 5 (11:46):
Oh that's nice.
Speaker 3 (11:51):
Really okay? Cool?
Speaker 5 (11:53):
All right, well that you guys. Seems like it worked out,
Thank you, all right? Cool.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Jubele's First Date follow up powered by the Advocates Injury
Attorney Online at Advocateslaw dot com.