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March 14, 2025 60 mins

In life, we often say less is more and that "more" is the abundance that comes from making space for what truly matters. And when simplicity comes your way, expect that money will follow. In this episode, Jen and Jill bring the science behind simplicity, how it shapes our money habits, and ways to embrace it in everyday life.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Episode four ninety three is Episode two ninety two, The
science behind how simplicity impacts your money.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to
save money, embrace simplicity, and liver a your life. Here
your hosts Jen and Jill.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen,
my name is Jill, and today we are talking about
simplicity and how it impacts your money Cognitively. We have
talked about minimalism and how that kind of affects your
finances physically and mentally, and so today's is about simplicity.

Speaker 3 (00:53):
We love talking about simplicity.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
We do.

Speaker 3 (00:56):
Many of our episodes are about this, and rather than
just record another episode, we figured we just play you
an oldie but a goodie.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
This is one of our most popular episodes from twenty
twenty three, and since so many people loved it, then
we say why create recreate the way?

Speaker 3 (01:13):
Because here's the thing. Our cognitive bias towards complexity will
continue to be there. So to be encouraged and motivated
towards simplicity. To choose simplicity, we're going to need to
keep having those reminders. Otherwise we're going to keep choosing
complicated and chaotic.

Speaker 1 (01:30):
But before we get too deep in the weeds and
make this introduction too complex, this episode is brought to
you by studies. Studies show the people who piecemeal information
from various sources can be successful, but they are typically
more stressed. Anecdotal evidence shows that getting step by step
information from a trusted source makes learning much easier and enjoyable.

(01:53):
In cite Frugal The Journal of Frugal Friends twenty five,
that's why we want to create a simple and affordable,
comprehensive frugal personal finance course. That sounded like a complicated
way to say, we want to make a personal finance
course that centers around the five pillars of frugality, so

(02:16):
good stewardship of your money, time, physical spaces and natural resources,
and number five your food. So this personal finance course
is now in pre order and we are gauging interest
to see if this is something you want and also
to see how you want it. Do you want more
of an education on frugality or do you want more

(02:40):
of an education on the perferal things around personal finance
like retirement, investing, insurance with a more frugal slant to
all of them, and so we're going to design the
course around the people who buy it in pre order.
It is available for pre order for one more week.

(03:02):
You can get more information and pre order at Frugal
Friends podcast dot com slash frugal Home.

Speaker 3 (03:08):
Super excited about this. I think it's a way we
can simplify values based spending for people.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
Yeah, and it goes. It's essentially if you've read our
book by what you Love without going broke, this would
be the next step. So we're going to have next
steps on the podcast. But we wanted to create something
that is not piecemeal, that is step by step and
enjoyable from a trusted source.

Speaker 3 (03:37):
But let's get into this podcast episode.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
Yes, let's not waste any more time. If you're looking
for a good episode to queue up afterwards, Episode four
sixty two about willpower and self control. Also the recent
one we just did about minimalism and your financial wellness.
Very good ones to q Okay, let's get into it.

Speaker 3 (04:01):
This first article comes from happiness dot com and gives
us six reasons that simplicity is beneficial, like six key
benefits of simplifying your life, and we're going to go
through all six. I think I agree with all of them.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
Wow, I know that's great. Yeah, yeah, that's very rare
that we agree with all of the ones on a list,
so good job Happiness dot Com, I too agree with them.
So the first one is to simplify, to learn more
about yourself. So when we did our spending makeover live

(04:42):
in January, one, if not the hardest thing everyone said
was actually figuring out your core values. And we think
finding what you value is essential to spending money on
things you love and saying no to the things that
you don't, and that really that is really hard. It's

(05:03):
a simple thing to say, it's an easy thing to say,
but when you are so used to focusing on other
people and other things, it can be hard to focus
on yourself in the ways that it matters. And so
when you simplify, you really do give yourself more space

(05:25):
to learn about yourself and to learn about those values
and develop values based spending. We were when I was
researching for this episode, I found an article on Psychology
Today that wasn't like a list, so it wasn't really
great for the purposes of the show, but it was

(05:47):
like of a woman who is Jewish by heritage, but
not by practice, and decided one weekend that they would
her and her son would observe the sabbath, like the
tradition told you a sabbath that has gosh. I think
she said, like fifty different rules, and she's like, I
never observed it because the rules seemed so restrictive and

(06:08):
just seemed like deprivation. And what she found when she
followed all these rules, they were essentially forcing her to simplify.
It was forced simplification, and it almost felt indulgent, and
that she had the space where her mind would normally
just go to her phone, or if she had a question,

(06:31):
it would go to Google, or she would call her mom,
like all these things that she normally used to distract
her brain. She had to just sit with herself.

Speaker 3 (06:40):
Yeah. I don't think we often give ourselves the space
to do that, and we don't have to. There is
so much that can take up our capacities and energy
and attention. And there is something within at least American culture,
of a hierarchy of value. The busier you are. I
think there's a lot of movements pushing against that, but

(07:03):
it's still ingrained in us. Like if you're busy, that
means you're important, and so that what that then does
and can lead to is not much time for process
or reflection or enjoying the simple things in life, the
beauties that are all around. But it's so much stress, overwhelmed, fatigue.

(07:25):
But then we just keep keep going without even thinking about, well,
what's causing this and what could shift and what do
I actually want? And I really appreciated how the author
pointed out too in the beginning, before they even got
into these six steps, just what they're noticing this in
themselves as they age, which I can relate to as
I'm getting older, I think that there is this draw

(07:49):
pull attraction to wanting less, wanting opportunities to exhale, wanting
to know more about myself, the environment in which I
can from which I think you also see like a
lot of people leaning into figuring out their ancestry or
being more interested in the culture in which they came from,

(08:10):
which I think is a really beautiful process that can
happen as we age. I also like how they reference
this aim at simplicity. It's not new. This is one
of those ancient paths that many religious groups and cultures
will follow, like from the monastic orders in the Middle
Ages to modern day Amish people or Quakers. The simple living,

(08:35):
the simple life is essential to some of these practices,
and you know, we can take what works for us
and leave behind what doesn't. But I think it's also
really interesting and helpful to recognize that there are some
practices that humanity has engaged with over the decades and

(08:56):
centuries that is just good for humans. And so when
we talk about simplicity, it's across the board of schedule
and within our lives and just creating space to exhale.
So all of that said, there's like, there's so much
foundation I think to lay here. But then the so
now skipping to number two, that a simpler lifestyle what

(09:19):
we're talking about here, can lead to improved relationships, and
they reference an essay by Amy Tai at Zioli. You
were voluntary simplicity is what this essay is about, and
how in that quest to push against the acquiring of

(09:42):
material possessions, we are often more likely to focus on relationships.
And so when spending excessive time on social media, being
occupied just being by being busy, oftentimes our relationships those
actually around us can suffer. And so when we read
do those things. It frees us up to spend more

(10:03):
time with friends and family. But then they also reference
when we give space for a pause and margin and
we're experiencing more time with friends and family. It can
also lead to a bit of editing of friendship groups.
I have a good friend who was recognizing in her
own life kind of taking inventory and keeping a pulse

(10:26):
on how do I feel after engaging with each of
these friends shout out to Ashland. She was describing that
she was starting to notice that with like some hangouts,
it was leading to like anxiety afterwards, and sometimes she
felt like so filled up and really like like life
was poured back into her. And I know we've said

(10:48):
this before. It's not as if we don't have any
relationships that have some form of like depletion or need
surrounding them, but at least intention with very life giving relationships.
But like, you're not going to create that pause unless
you've got some of that curiosity and you've cleared some
space for yourself to say, how did that interaction make

(11:09):
me feel? What is this group of friends providing to me?
How is this going to benefit my life? Even long term?
I think it's a great thing to be focusing on.
But we're not going to be able to do that
if we're just so cluttered.

Speaker 1 (11:23):
Right, it's so easy, like you leave someone and you
immediately will get on social media or thinking about okay,
what's for dinner, what's the next thing, and we fil
phil fill our heads. Yeah, every single moment that we
don't give the opportunity even for like uncomfortable thoughts. Yeah, like, yeah,
that's so interesting. So this next one is that simple

(11:48):
living boosts your bank balance.

Speaker 3 (11:51):
Oh more alliteration.

Speaker 1 (11:53):
Yeah, so this one actually does have a study according
to a UK study from twenty eighteen which question two
thousand people, which one thousand is my minimum for including
survey results. He said, money worries affect forty percent of
the population. And so if you simplify, And I think

(12:13):
that article really that I that I read yesterday really
made me think about the indulgence of simplicity, that we
we don't want to deprive ourselves, right, and so sometimes
simple living, minimalism, what have you, they are not the
same thing, but they can be equated with deprivation, as
can saving money, but really giving yourself over to the

(12:39):
luxuriation of it, like all of the the indulgences that
simplification and minimalism and this stuff can provide. It just
takes a mindset shift of Like this woman sitting in
her house, like she got to read through so much

(13:01):
more of a book than she would have because she's like,
when I read, I think I should be writing. Because she's,
you know, writing for psychology today, obviously she's like, I
feel guilty and I should be writing. But when I'm
you know, doing the Sabbath, I can't write, so I'm
forced into further self care. Almost.

Speaker 3 (13:20):
Oh that's so true. Like just to sit and listen
to music feels indulgent, but there is something very simple
to that, and it can clear up mind space and
create rest.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
Yeah, and so we when we're creating, like we're when
we're focusing on the indulgences and the luxuriation of simplicity, you're.

Speaker 3 (13:44):
Done with it.

Speaker 1 (13:44):
I am Now we don't have to rely on spending
money to fill those gaps, which we so often do
when we feel like we need to treat ourselves. But
there are other ways to treat yourself that almost feel
like guilty. You feel guilty about yeah doing.

Speaker 3 (14:05):
Yeah, Oh that's so true. Number four on here is
living a simple life is great for your health, and
they reference a study from twenty fourteen, which is just
on the cusp of my standards for research studies that
they're fifteen years older, newer, so we're right there, which

(14:25):
is crazy. Twenty fourteen oh Man Okay published in the
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology where they found a
link between materialism and they define that as valuing possessions
and money, and they're that connection to poor physical health.
And another team from Knox College in Illinois also found

(14:47):
an even stronger link between materialism and engagement in risky
behaviors that could damage physical health, like drinking, alcohol, smoking,
drug use. And so then they're kind of saying it
makes sense then that in the reverse of that, having
a more non materialistic attitude could lead to more positive

(15:08):
health outcomes, which I think is wild. But I've also
been thinking recently and having conversations with people about just
some of the trueness. I'm making up my own word too,
of that concept of more money more problems, and money

(15:28):
isn't the issue, like it's what we do with it.
But I think that there is this principle where the
more that you have, whether it's money or resources. The
more responsible you are for those things, and there's a
weight and a pressure, whether realized or unrealized, of what
am I now going to do with these things that

(15:49):
I've been entrusted with the goal of frugality is to
be good stewards of that. But if we've not created
space for mindfulness and intentionality, I think sometimes that can
lead to that subconscious, not realized weight and responsibility that
leads to some of those risky behaviors like Okay, well
I've got this and I'm not putting much thought into

(16:11):
like what am I going to do with it? And
this is what the world is telling me is good
and helpful and will be effective and efficient for my life,
And then it leads to some of this. I mean, yeah,
some of the craziest behaviors come from the wealthiest people.
So there is like there is a phenomena here.

Speaker 1 (16:31):
We're looking at you, old Justin Bieber.

Speaker 3 (16:35):
I don't know, I'm even thinking like the billionaires. I
think that there's just something too. You just have an
absurd amount of money and okay, I know that, like
no billionaires are like listening to our podcast, but like,
you know, thinking of that on a smaller scale that
the more that that's the focus of our time, energy

(16:56):
and efforts, there is this strong link between then maybe
not making the best decisions. If our aim is just
collecting everything I can possibly collect and having all the
luxurious materials in my home, then that type of mentality
could lead to risk your linse.

Speaker 1 (17:18):
Yeah, it's the materialism mentality, not necessarily the income mentality.
Exactly when I was writing my first book, The No
Spend Challenge Guide, I came across a study and at
this point it probably falls outside your your time limitsover
we're ald, but it studied a group of people who

(17:40):
had a lot of clutter in their homes, like border
like borderline hoarders, and then just the like on the
same spectrum to all to people who didn't have a
lot of things in their homes. And they found that
the people who had a lot of stuff in their homes,
like the spectrum kind of correlated to less emphasis on health.

(18:03):
So the more stuff they had in their home, the
less they tried to be healthy. Interesting, So that was
another way that I found simplicity, like in your stuff
really does help because we all know that health is
wealth and Obviously being healthy does save you money in

(18:26):
the long run too, just for practical reason.

Speaker 3 (18:29):
I mean, I just don't have a lot of stuff
on my own because I don't want to dust a lot.

Speaker 1 (18:32):
Oh I hate cleaning. Yeah, I had to Oh my gosh,
I had to change the sheets on my bed more
than once in a month. And I am pregnant too,
So like it was just like I can't have too
many beds in this house, Like you can have too
many bedrooms.

Speaker 3 (18:50):
Technically, don't they say you should change your sheets every
two weeks?

Speaker 1 (18:53):
Okay, we had this conversation before. We don't have to
hide it, we truly are we. Oh yeah, I'm like
every two months. But I think the stand there. So
we talked about this. You said every month, and now
you're saying every two months. Fishing I'm starting.

Speaker 3 (19:11):
Okay, we're getting more and more into the true.

Speaker 1 (19:13):
We're gonna move on before you reveal anything else you
don't want to. So number five is simplistic. Living means
increased focus, which is so true. The more we have
to focus on, the more we will just not focus
on anything. And that's like we think we need to

(19:34):
have all of these plates spinning at the same time.
But the more you have, you're gonna focus on none
of them, not even one of them, is going to
get your full attention. And this is why we talk
so much about prioritizing and not trying to balance. Balance
is a myth. Prioritize what's important to you, when it's

(19:56):
important to you, change, switch it up as you need to,
but prioritize focus, and that means you're probably not going
to be able to work on ten things at once.
So simplify your goals, simplify your schedule, your activities so

(20:16):
that you can have reasonable priorities and be able to
focus on them as needed.

Speaker 3 (20:23):
And the last one on here, number six, Living a
simple life helps the environment. There is a symbiotic relationship
between simple living and being good stewards of the space
that we take up. As we are more content and
need less, we consume less, which means less waste. I

(20:46):
think a big industry where we consume a lot. The
industry itself utilizes a ton of energy and we often
throw away is fashion and clothing, and so when we
are not buying so much fast fashion, then we're not
contributing as much to the textile industry, which is one

(21:08):
of the biggest polluters, and it's just it just leads
to then more sustainability as we're not consuming and throwing away.
And again we've mentioned it before, it's kind to then
like the we're not then taking advantage of people either,
Like there's there's both the environment, there's the workers, there's

(21:28):
all of it. Paying fair wages is a part of
this equation. So there's so much interconnectedness between what benefits
us also benefits others. And when we can find that
beautiful intersection, what an amazing thing.

Speaker 1 (21:45):
Yes, and most of these that we read out do
have like studies associated with them, so if you're interested
in those, definitely check out the article. It will be
in our show notes.

Speaker 3 (21:56):
In this next article that we're going to go through
is how to Simplify your life and spend less And
it came from Jen she wrote it. Yeah, you're talking
about it Modern Frugality. It's her blog.

Speaker 1 (22:14):
It's so I read other articles because I didn't want
to be the person that uses their own article.

Speaker 3 (22:23):
But I'm here for it.

Speaker 1 (22:24):
It was the best one, you know, like it was
and maybe it was the one that said what I
wanted to say the best exactly.

Speaker 3 (22:33):
So there's tons of tips in here. We're each going
to go through three of our favorites, and I'm going
to pick first because I feel like you've got the
upper hand on this one. Oh wow.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (22:44):
The first one is to declutter your home. We've already
kind of identified this one already. But the less physical
clutter that you have in your home, the more focused
that you can have, the less you have to less
time and you have to spend on maintaining and cleaning
and replacing and fixing, and all of that saved time

(23:09):
and money can lead to increased contentment, which then leads
to less spending, which then leads to you being able
to spend your time how you want to spend it.
So decluttering. I know that we're all different. There's definitely
a spectrum of what is the most beneficial for each
one of us, what simplicity looks like, what minimalism looks like.

(23:33):
But for me, at least, I can speak for my
own experience. When my space is free of just clutter,
the more I'm able to yeah focus on my task
at hand, get into my work, not be as distracted,
and not even feel as stressed or overwhelmed, even if
I have a lot on my schedule. If my physical

(23:56):
space isn't as cluttered, then I feel more a to
engage with whatever my obligations or responsibilities are that day.
So just here's your encouragement. It can be a lot
of work at first, but once you put in the
big effort, its maintenance after that, and it can make
such a huge difference.

Speaker 1 (24:16):
Yeah, And one of the studies that we didn't cover
that the last article reference did state that participants in
their study who had less clutter were able to focus
better on tests. So that's just another like science reason
that having less physical stuff affects your mind and also

(24:41):
affects your ability to make financial decisions, make spending decisions.
We don't think so much about that, But the more
clutter we have in our space in our mind, of course,
the poorer our decisions are going to be. Financially.

Speaker 3 (24:57):
Yeah, the more clutter we have in our finances, the
less likely we are to want to look at it
because it feels overwhelming. But even simplifying the way that
our spending and finances and build pay process looks like
can also make us feel more competent and at ease
in the way that we're navigating that aspect of our lives.

Speaker 1 (25:17):
Yeah, the next one for me, and this is one
that's hitting me really hard right now personally, So you're
a little vulnerable before well, social media. I very much
dislike social media. I really hate participating in it. I

(25:40):
really hate consuming it and creating it. I think it
can be really helpful, but I think it's few and
far between that it's helpful. Ninety five percent of it
is mind numbing entertainment, things that distract us from what's
going on in reality, and then like five percent of

(26:02):
it is very helpful content. So like, there is good
stuff out there on social media. Like I would never
say that that everything is trash, but so much of
it is and not trash, it's just so distracted, and
it is clutter. It is clutter, it's mind clutter, and

(26:25):
so decluttering your social media, fasting from social media, whatever
you feel like you need to do to get out
of social media, is going to help you simplify other
things in your life by just simplifying that one thing,
Like what's the one thing that's going to make other

(26:47):
things down the line easier or unnecessary. I really think
minimizing social media is one of those things, because then
you're minimizing ads the cause you to spend. You're minimizing
seeing like your friends have new things that you want.
They're not even trying to sell you. They just are
having it, but you see it and then you want it.

(27:09):
So it minimizes that aspect, But then it also minimizes
just the habit of just picking up your phone and
ignoring what's going on and like consuming social media. And
that's so much of what I do that it's very
hard to strike a balance between like having a job
like this where people want to see your face, right,

(27:33):
and it's like good, this is how I make the
you know, the bit of money that I do make,
the big bucks that I do make. So it's hard
to like strike that there is no balance. I'll just
say there's no balance with me between like trying to
show my face.

Speaker 3 (27:54):
It's like all or nothing. Like sometimes it is heavy,
it's all on, like we recently started dating, and then
other times it's like, I don't know, we're on a break.

Speaker 1 (28:06):
Yeah, So that's how I feel about social media. So
if you don't see me on social media, that's.

Speaker 3 (28:12):
Why I know. Oh likewise, but yeah, we're just in
a process of simplifying, you know, Yeah, that's what's happening.

Speaker 1 (28:21):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (28:21):
So the third one that I do love, just related
to simplicity is number three, getting out of debt. I
know we talk about this a ton, it's one of
the biggest things we discuss when it comes to this podcast.
But when we look at this from a lens of simplicity,
I have to agree as well, and you reference in

(28:41):
this article, it doesn't just mathematically make sense, but is
also a mental and emotional weight lifted. Now we recognize
this is a long journey. This isn't like a declutter
your home this weekend getting out of debt. For many
of us, this is a long haul decision that will
often take years. So there's a lot that needs to

(29:04):
go into that, but it does lead to freed up
mental and emotional space, freed up finances, and just ability
to now make decisions for investing for retirement or having
maybe a little bit more discretionary income, or just not
worrying that much anymore. And that is an incredible benefit.

(29:26):
So that's a great way to simplify as well.

Speaker 1 (29:30):
Yeah, and something I feel like I want to point
out is that lately we've been getting a lot of
questions about consolidating debt, which does have the benefit of simplifying, right, So, like,
what we're talking about is simplifying, but I think it's
over advertised because it's advertised is a way to save

(29:52):
on debt, but in reality saves you very little on debt.
It just moves debt around. It makes you think you've
done something because you have simplified the problem. So that's
not a bad thing, but you need to know what
you're getting into. And like, we don't typically recommend debt
consolidation because while it does simplify what the debt looks like,

(30:15):
it is adding a level of complexity to your actual
financial practice. So it's not like a simplification of you know,
when you pay off your smallest loan, that debt goes away.
So this is one of the one of the benefits
of the debt snowball is that you can simplify what
your debt looks like or what your bank accounts look

(30:38):
like more quickly. So it's a quicker simplification process. Even
though maybe it costs at a little bit more mathematically,
it does give you that simplifying part quicker, And so
we would probably say do that instead of consolidating debt.

(30:58):
If that's what you're thinking thinking about, not that's helpful.

Speaker 3 (31:02):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (31:03):
My next one is number four. We're not going to
go through every single one of them.

Speaker 3 (31:08):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (31:09):
What just happens upfront is what I did. Uh So
number four is learn to say no and that that's
going to offend something you're talking to me. No, I'm
not like you know, you know how to say no,
but some people don't. And I think I grew up

(31:30):
watching these people. So in my adult life I say
the first line. I am the type of person who
says no first. I always say no first, and then
I take time to think about it and whether I
want my to change my answer to yes.

Speaker 4 (31:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (31:49):
So some people would say, Jen, you should just say
let me think about it first.

Speaker 3 (31:55):
Do too much on the other instrum.

Speaker 4 (31:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
So so maybe I wouldn't recommend becoming me, but a
lot of people start with lead with yes, just out
of insecurity wanting to be a people pleaser. Oh, this
is a perfect example. So last week I took like
a Girl's trip with our friends Caroline Wensel Alison Baggerley

(32:19):
inspired budget. Alison is a gem of a person and
a people pleaser, and so there. I can't even remember
what it was, but like, I think I was maybe
road raging for a second. And I won't repeat what
I said.

Speaker 3 (32:36):
But we don't have the explicit rating, right.

Speaker 1 (32:40):
Alison was like, oh, I was like I always like
give these people the benefit of the depth or no. No,
it was a social media thing. It wasn't road rage.
Somebody was trying to like manipulate, to manipulate her, I'll
just say that. And she knew it too, she knew it,
but she just wanted to give them the benefit of

(33:02):
the doubt, even though she knew what they were doing.
She just wanted to say yes, yeah, because she wanted
to give them the benefit of the doubt. And you know,
she's just a gem of a person, right, Saying no
to people who are trying to manipulate you does not
make you any less of a gem. Yeah, that's what.

Speaker 3 (33:23):
You're working out. I mean, it sounds like the radical middle.
Whether you find yourself on one extreme of leading with
no or leading with yes. Is that Let me think
about it, and either side could choose that pathway, just
to give yourself space just a pause to identify, is
this something I want to engage in, and I think,
I mean, it sounds like a great way of living

(33:45):
for Allison to just be a gem of a person.
Like then everybody likes you and everybody we all do.
But if it hurts you, I think that's where it's
time for some reevaluation. If you are always saying yes
at the cost of yourself and your own well being,

(34:08):
then that's where we need to kind of identify some
different patterns and relating.

Speaker 1 (34:13):
Even if it doesn't always end up in you being
a stressed, overtired people pleaser, if it's resulting in that
more often than it is resulting in you being filled up,
there's an issue because there are a lot of important
things that you have to do that aren't going to
fill you up, but they're important, so we have to

(34:33):
do them. So if you're doing things for other people
that are draining you as well that you don't have
to do, those things need to be cut out of
your life. And it's not always it's typically not people
trying to manipulate you. It's typically really well intentioned people
that really see that you would be a good fit
for something and it's a good opportunity. But sometimes you

(34:57):
have to say no to good so that you can
pursue great And so you have to really either say
no or say I'll think about it, yeah, to really
give yourself time to figure out is this good or
is this great?

Speaker 3 (35:12):
And that's what leads to simplifying our schedules, which I
think for many of us is where we all need
the most work of how do I continue to kind
of rain myself in from the vortex of busyness that
will suck us in. I do think there needs to
be active, intentional, perpetual awareness of the vortex of busyness.

(35:38):
It will always want to suck us in and own us,
so that saying no is what leads to some of
that more simple schedule. I am going to jump all
the way to the bottom of this. I'm done going
in order is plan a simple menu? Ugh, I could
not agree with this more and probably because you wrote

(35:59):
it and I like and our friends. But I think
when it comes to activities that we have to do daily,
like food, this is also where we can experience a
lot of overwhelm and fatigue and can lead to the
convenience purchases of eating out or ordering takeout, which isn't

(36:20):
always the friendliest for our budgets or our money if
it's not something that's been planned for, and so I
think one way to get around that is to really
simplify what we're going to eat at home throughout the week.
That doesn't mean that it's bland or not fun or inedible,

(36:41):
just simple like pairing down the number of ingredients that
you need. You can still reuse and repurpose ingredients, but
making it easier or more accessible for yourself will cut
down on the amount of times that you feel like
you need to eat out. It will have the decisions
already made for you, so there's less of that decision

(37:01):
fatigue and usually can lead to lower cooking times not
taking up as much of your space and energy. For
me personally, I think one of the ways that I
do this is I'll change up a lot of what
we'd eat for dinner, reusing ingredients, but my breakfasts and
lunches from week to week will look very similar. Like

(37:23):
a breakfast for me, it's two options. It's going to
be a smoothie or some eggs and toast, and that's
fine because I know I'm still going to get variety
that day. Lunches I'll have two to three options on
hand in any given week, so I feel like I
have options, but it's not complicated. I'm not reinventing all

(37:43):
of the time and then changing up week to week
what the dinners are going to be. Again, still doesn't
have to be complicated, but I found the simpler that
I can keep it, the more likely I am to
eat at home and stick with it. Sometimes it's really
fun to try the new thing and make a new
you'll every single night just to like keep our palettes tantalized.

(38:06):
But that's not gonna last long. There's no longevity in that,
and we're not going to experience the benefits of simplicity
in that way.

Speaker 1 (38:14):
Absolutely. I hate that I have to pick just one
more from the list because it's like.

Speaker 3 (38:21):
My people can go check it out. Yeah, you're artically
check it out.

Speaker 1 (38:24):
There's some like okay, so there's some really concrete, practical tips,
but I'm gonna go with one more non concrete one.
And I know you guys hate that, but here I
am five is focus on one thing at a time.

Speaker 3 (38:39):
I left that for you. I'm like, I did not
steal her one thing that is through and through she
has trademarked I am.

Speaker 1 (38:47):
I am obsessed with the concept of and it's essentially
the just the concept of prioritizing to choose, be intentional
about the things that you are working on, the financial
goals that you are working on, the life change goals
you are working on. Be intentional and work on one
at a time. Making small changes and working on one

(39:09):
thing at a time is not sexy. We do not
want to have gradual growth and change. We love a
good overnight success and that's just not reality. It's just
not like if your New Year's resolution was to lose
ten pounds, payoff debt, and have a smoothie every day,

(39:31):
how's that going for you? How is that going for you?
I am sure not well. But if your New year's
resolution was just I want to want to drink eighty
ounces of water every day, that's it. No other goals, nothing.

Speaker 3 (39:45):
Doesn't mean you're not doing anything at all. It's just
not taking up the majority of your focus.

Speaker 1 (39:50):
Right. It's like one choose one thing that can help
multiple other things. So like just keeping on the water.
I know that's not financial, but water can help you,
you know, get your cravings under control, so it'll help
with food. It can help you get your hormones and

(40:11):
your water weight fluctuations under control, so it helps with that,
it helps with so many other different things. Yet it
is one thing. It is just one thing, and it's
much easier to do than focusing on all these big,
higher level goals. So, yes, your goal may be to
pay off debt, but what are the actions that are

(40:33):
going to take you to get there? Okay, think about
those and then pick one to focus on at a
time and really dig into it until you feel like
you've mastered it and you can move on. Yes, that
is focusing on one thing at a time, and that
is what's going to move the needle. We can't all

(40:54):
be overnight success stories. If it happens, cool, but don't
plan for that. Don't plan to be an overnight success story.

Speaker 3 (41:02):
And really, the journey is so much more, oh my god, yeah,
than the destination when you are.

Speaker 1 (41:10):
When you become an overnight success you miss out on
all the learning and growth that the journey provides. So
it's really you miss out on a lot. So plan
to be average, play to be normal.

Speaker 3 (41:22):
Do you know what my very average one thing is,
to the exclusion of all other things, This is the
one thing, nothing else, but whereby doing we we we
we gain so much.

Speaker 1 (41:36):
But I think it was an overnight success. I mean
it's a wonder thing.

Speaker 3 (41:40):
This one is the like the destination, the journey. The
bill of the week.

Speaker 2 (41:56):
That's right, it's time for the best minute of your
time week. Maybe a baby was born and his name
is William. Maybe you've paid off your mortgage, maybe your
card died and you're happy to not have to pay
that bill anymore. That's bills, bffalo bills, Bill Clinton.

Speaker 3 (42:13):
This is the bill of the week.

Speaker 4 (42:16):
So find feet from Scotland. This month, I cleared my
online banking overdraft for which I was being charged monthly.
Transferred the violence to zero percent credit card, so now
I can peel off my credit card without the monthly
charges I was getting. Will I was in my overdraft,
I was being charged thirty pound a month, which will
now just go off to paying off that date.

Speaker 1 (42:36):
Thanks. Isn't it so interesting when you start to look
at your finances and you find things that you don't
want to find, like you're being charged thirty dollars a
month for overdrafting. That's crazy. But now Katie, you took
you were brave, and you went in there like Meredith.

(43:00):
I envisioned that you are like Mereda because I like
Disney and you just went in there and you said
no more transferring it. And now I'm gonna use this
thirty dollars a month to pay off my credit card.

Speaker 3 (43:14):
Yes, well done, Katie from Scotland. Jen is being quite imaginative.

Speaker 1 (43:20):
I don't even know where Scotland is where that movie
takes place, and I'm so sorry. If it's not Yeah,
here we go.

Speaker 3 (43:27):
It's Irish. Maybe she was Scottish. Okay, we're gonna figure
that out, Katie, but mostly we're focused on you. And yeah,
how you paid off your credit card? You no longer
got these overdraft fees happening, So just well done. What
do you got, Jen, She.

Speaker 1 (43:43):
Is voiced by a Scottish actress. Huh, it's from obviously
a made up place. So we're gonna say, We're gonna
say Scotland. Okay, we're gonna go to Scotland. You went, Katie.

Speaker 3 (43:56):
For sharing a Hill of the week. If you all
listening want to share your bill if it has anything
to do with like a Disney movie character, sliceing and
dice and some overdraft fees or paying off credit cards,
or or your name is Bill. I don't know how
many times I have to say this. Visit Frugal Friends

(44:16):
podcast dot com slash Bill, leave us your bill.

Speaker 1 (44:20):
No, it's time for I don't think I have to
get any more vulnerable because I already got vulnerable. No, no, no.

Speaker 3 (44:32):
It doesn't work that way. You chose vulnerability, this is
now vulnerability.

Speaker 1 (44:38):
Okay, So what's something in your life that has been
hard to simplify? And I think you should go first?

Speaker 3 (44:48):
Uh huh. I feel like did you write this question
or was this a goldie question?

Speaker 2 (44:53):
Is me?

Speaker 3 (44:56):
Oh, my schedule? This is so vulnerab because I would
love to say that I'm just like crushing simplicity, and
maybe I'm doing that in my possessions and just like
getting rid of things, But I'm not crushing it my schedule.

Speaker 1 (45:14):
The nicer you are, and the more of a gem
of a person you are, I think, the harder it
is to simplify the schedule.

Speaker 3 (45:23):
The thing about it for me is I don't think.
I don't feel as though I am just bending to
the will and needs of others. There is a true
tension for me. We were talking about this even before
we hit the record button today where I want a
lot of things, it is mostly a me problem where

(45:43):
I want all of the things. I want rest and
opportunities to explore my hobbies and things that are life
giving to me. And I want to grow this business
and pursue other types of career, and I want to
host people, and I want to hang out and I

(46:04):
want to build community, like I just want all the things,
like I want to say yes to it all, not
because I feel like I'm play cating someone or something.
It just truly is what I want to do. So
that has been and potentially will be a forever and
always thing to navigate of still sincerely keeping a pulse on. Okay,

(46:29):
but what is going to be best for me? What
is this going to cost me? Not just monetarily, like
what will this cost me in my energies and capacities?
What will that potentially steal from something else? Like if
I choose to go all out just in the social world,
then there is a cost benefit analysis to that. There's

(46:53):
an opportunity cost then that means projects aren't getting done
at my house, or if I go all in on projects,
that means community is not being found. So it's there
is such a tension, and I'm sure there's plenty of
people listening who like want to collect all the things.
You just want to do it all and it's all
so appetizing and appealing and fun and enjoyable. So really

(47:17):
deciding how do I want to spend like the twenty
four hours that's been allotted to me and creating some
space to keep a pulse on how is this impacting me?
Was that? Was that a good choice? Or would I
want to shift or morph that in the future. Yeah,
I'm not there. I don't know that I have or
will be there.

Speaker 1 (47:37):
Yeah, I don't think, especially because your value is so
like very much aligned with what you were just saying,
Like to be healthy in your values creates like the
perfect schedule, but nobody's perfect or perfectly healthy. Yeah, so
it's always something that you'll have to keep a pulse on.

Speaker 3 (47:58):
I think I have also, I'll just say this and
then I'll be done in case it's fruitful for anybody else.
But I think I've realized that I had a narrative
going that go Go Go go go was not good
for me, mostly because of what I think is talked
about like just being busy isn't isn't good? And I

(48:20):
would partially agree with that, but then to also realize
maybe that narrative is what's mostly unhelpful, Like I love
spending time with people that is actually life giving. What
if that's a form of rest for me? Where I
might have this very like mono idea like of oh,

(48:43):
this is what rest is. It's only sitting down in
complete quietness reading a book, That's what rest is. But
to come to realize that might be somebody's rest, but
for me, my rest can look different, and usually for
most of us, we've got a lot of different forms
of rest. So I think it's been taking a lot
of the pressure away from myself the things I put

(49:06):
on myself to say this might feel like a lot,
and maybe others would look on the way that I
live my life or spend my time as like that's
just too much. But it might be too much for
that person and what's valuable for them, But for me,
it's okay and it's not hurting me, and if anything,
there's aspects of it that are life giving. So that's

(49:29):
been a whole other kind of realization and mostly helpful
for me. To not just get bummed that I filled
my space and time with people and things that I
really enjoy. That can be Okay, that's lovely, that's great.
What about you get vulnerable?

Speaker 1 (49:46):
Well, I mean, I'm gonna is it a cop out
to say the same the social media thing again? No
do it, because that really does plague me. I was
off social media entirely for about three months, and then
people kind of convinced me to get back on. They're like,
it's free marketing for your podcast and your business, and

(50:08):
we're going for a book deal and every publisher wants
to see you're active on social media. Like it's just
so sad.

Speaker 3 (50:19):
I feel like I hear this from you, Like there's
always there's a cycle of yeah, I'm leaving it, this
is good for me. Then you get into some mastermind
group and they're like, you're shaming you into getting back on,
and you're like, I know that they're right, and you
do crush it. You post some really great stuff. You're funny,
you're a gem, you're witty, you're insightful, You've got a

(50:41):
lot to give. And I think that's especially in this
space right where there's like a business connected to it.
That's a big component. There's got to be a radical middle.
And we're partially now getting into business meeting here. Yeah,
we'll find.

Speaker 1 (50:54):
The radical We will have to find the radical middle. Yeah,
so that's that's kind of where I'm at. I just
I don't have strong enough boundaries or self discipline to
not get sucked into it. It is for sure, like, yeah,

(51:16):
I am, I could be more disciplined, but also I
can give myself grace for just being not perfect. Yeah,
so that's where I'm at.

Speaker 3 (51:29):
Agreed, Listening back to that.

Speaker 1 (51:37):
Lightning round about being stressed to be on social media
one hundred percent still a struggle, Still still a struggle.
I think we're getting closer to a radical metal. It's
so weird to hear, like we were trying to get
a book deal and yes, that was important we had

(51:59):
to do. We had to, Yeah, like it was not
an option, and it did impact our activity on social
media did impact the book deal we got, and we
got a good book deal. And so now yeah, and
it's still one of those like when we talk about
the one thing, what's one thing you can do to

(52:21):
make all other things easier or unnecessary? Social media kind
of ties into that I think we've decided YouTube is
that one thing for us this year, because it makes
social media easier and it is an integral part of
our growth.

Speaker 3 (52:39):
I think part of our radical middle that we've found
in social media is me taking on some of the
social media management. To everyone's full shock and surprise, you
are the one.

Speaker 1 (52:54):
That initially did the Frugal Friends podcast Instagram. In those
early days, you made a great for every episode.

Speaker 3 (53:01):
Oh that's right. You started it right.

Speaker 1 (53:05):
And now you're You're just coming home, is what it is.

Speaker 3 (53:11):
I still can't stand Instagram, but if I'm gonna do it,
this is the best case scenario for it. I actually
prefer to engage with Instagram as Frugal Friends than I
do on my own personal accounts. I say, not one
who's just posting whatever. I really like giving helpful and

(53:35):
entertaining content. So when I've been able to come at
it with that framework and lens, it has really lowered
the barrier to entry for me.

Speaker 1 (53:44):
Yes, and I have enjoyed taking our YouTube videos and
making those into reels because that is very easy for me.

Speaker 3 (53:55):
I love that. Look at us forget we find the
radical metal.

Speaker 1 (54:00):
We find it in community. Oh, I think we don't
find it in isolation.

Speaker 3 (54:05):
A great Thank you all so much for listening to
this podcast. Thank you also for reading our book, maybe
even listening to our book because it is an audio
format and those of you who have read the book
have been leaving such kind reviews, so we've been wanting
to give some space to reading the reviews of our book,
like this one from Jack one p thirty five stars says,

(54:29):
an absolute gem of a book that's focused on spending.
I love this book so much. It's a breath of
fresh air from other personal finance books. The focus is
not on budgeting or baby steps, and instead is on
understanding values and all of the things that trigger spending.
If you already have your budget, this book is the
next step to think more about spending habits. It's worth

(54:51):
coming back to reread and reference Jen and Jill's words.
The writing is non judgmental. For a reminder when I'm
struggling with shopping. One of the biggest takeaways retail therapy
can feel like the one thing we can control when
things are chaotic. Also check out their podcast for Cool Friends.

Speaker 1 (55:08):
Yes, thank you so much.

Speaker 2 (55:09):
Jack.

Speaker 1 (55:10):
The funny thing is that so many people have said
that the book is shamefree and non judgmental. That those
are some of the words Amazon has used in the
biggest like what people say most shameful, judgmental, but yet

(55:31):
every other word or shame align with that, right, Yeah,
it's powerful, helpful, values based spending shaming.

Speaker 3 (55:42):
Yeahs like, oh, they're probably saying it's non shaming.

Speaker 1 (55:45):
It's hilarious. Thank you so much, Jack, Thank you for listening.
Thank you for reading the book. If you have not
gotten your copy of Buy What You Love without going broke,
please head to buy what youlovebook dot com. We also
have directions on there for requesting it at your library.
So and if you have, please leave a rating and

(56:08):
review for the book on Amazon good Reads, review for
the show on Spotify or Apple. All of it helps
us and spreading this message to more people.

Speaker 3 (56:19):
See you next time.

Speaker 1 (56:20):
Bye. Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni.

Speaker 3 (56:36):
Okay, Jen, I figured it out. Oh would you figure out?
I'm sitting over here with a smelly shirt. Oh, yeah,
shirt smells.

Speaker 1 (56:46):
I can't smell it.

Speaker 3 (56:47):
That's very good. Yeah, I think you'd have to be
as close as my noses to my shirt to smell it.
But I am constantly getting whiffs of something, and then
I really First of all, I didn't realize where the
smell was coming from. Then I realized it's my shirt.
And now I'm like, why does my shirt smell? And
I think I have come to the answer. So this

(57:08):
is actually like an elongated sports brawl that I'm wearing.
And during the hurricanes, we stayed with friends who were
not in a flood zone, but they have a part
of their property that becomes like a little pond when
it rains a ton, And before the winds got really bad,

(57:31):
we went swimming in the water that becomes a pond.

Speaker 1 (57:37):
On my face has changed from intrigued to alarmed.

Speaker 3 (57:44):
Alarmed, yeah, and then so it was like a bathing
suit top for me. Then then we showered, rinsed off
the top in the shower, but left it at their house,
didn't remember to pack it back up with us when
we moved our whole lives back into our home after
the hurricane, and then didn't get this shirt back from

(58:07):
them until at least two months later. I did wash it,
but I'm thinking it sat so long in pond water
or like the remains of pond water, that it is
still holding on to the stench of it despite having

(58:28):
been washed. And this is now the first time that
I'm wearing it realizing, Yeah, it didn't, it didn't wash out.

Speaker 1 (58:36):
Because of you're all natural.

Speaker 3 (58:40):
Washing going for the Yeah, maybe maybe maybe the length
of time is to blame. Maybe my homemade laundry detergent
is to blame. I'm gonna go with length of time.
Sitting in pond water.

Speaker 1 (58:57):
I'm just thinking, like I wouldn't let my children and
swim in pond water like.

Speaker 3 (59:04):
Just ever under any circumstances.

Speaker 1 (59:08):
I mean, it's a They make those to be like
those little retention ponds, and so there can't be good
stuff pulling up in there like throughout time, and then
it just pools in and it's all gross, and then
the rain comes and just softens it so you can't

(59:31):
see it. It's all still in there though.

Speaker 3 (59:34):
Well it wasn't. It wasn't. There was no water in
it before the hurricane, right, so I could just see
the bottom. I could see it. What was there grass? Look, listen,
I didn't stay in the water long. It was a
quick little The world is crumbling around us, but you

(59:54):
know what, we can swim in this two feet of
water over here.

Speaker 1 (59:58):
For two feet? Oh yeah, you do.

Speaker 3 (01:00:02):
We just like sat there for a minute.

Speaker 1 (01:00:06):
All of this seems so bizarre to me.

Speaker 3 (01:00:10):
When the world is grumbling around you, Jen, you take
what you can get. Listen, you took videos hold on
in the midst of a hurricane, sitting on the front
porch just watching pumpkins float by. I did, and that
was taken what you could get, just the simple pleasures
of life.

Speaker 1 (01:00:29):
There is so much different me noticing something funny and
taking a video of it and.

Speaker 3 (01:00:36):
You noticing an opportunity.

Speaker 1 (01:00:38):
For fun noticing two feet of standing water and walking
into it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:44):
Yeah, okay, yeah, it is a choice I made.

Speaker 1 (01:00:48):
I'm glad you're now.

Speaker 3 (01:00:50):
I am still experiencing the consequences because this shard smells
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