October 24, 2023 • 14 mins
In this quick episode, I'll show you how to achieve that "perfect" work-life balance. SIKE! There's no such thing. But don't worry, I've got some real-world advice to help you navigate the impossibility of a flawless work-life balance. I'll share the tools that have worked for me, helping you find the balance that suits you best. The more we chat about the challenges of juggling work and life, the easier it gets.
Follow Brenna on social media (@Bren_Hucks) for more great content!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello, my friends, Welcome back to another episode. I am
so excited to talk to you guys today about one
of my number one topics that I got asked when
I'm either on the road or on a panel, and
it's how do I maintain work life balance? Now. The
reason that this is one of my favorite topics is
because it is literally so hard to answer. It is
(00:24):
so hard to do. But I also think that it
is so important to talk about because when we really
get honest about how we are maintaining these quote unquote
work life balances, we can start to feel a lot
better about how we're navigating our own journey. Because here's
the thing, and I firmly believe this. Nobody has it
(00:47):
one hundred percent all together all of the time, and
if they do, they're lying. I refuse to believe it.
So with that in mind, I'm going to share with
you how I maintain a work life balance for my life,
for my family. And one of the challenges that I
have regarding my line of work is it is so
(01:10):
rare to have a consistent schedule. So if you have
a consistent schedule, I feel like it might be a
little bit easier to schedule out time with your family
or hold those boundaries of unplugging. But with my world,
I don't have that, and so I want to share
with you guys how I navigate being a mom, doing
the podcast, social media, traveling for snowboarding speeches, all of
(01:35):
the things that I'm doing. How do I navigate that
with being a happy, healthy mom and also a happy
healthy wife. That is also a challenge is maintaining a
relationship with your partner. So anyway, how can we have
it all? I think the biggest thing that I have
(01:55):
done in my life to be okay and to feel
confident with me my work life balance isn't necessarily being like, oh,
I'm going to do twenty five percent mom in today
and sixty five percent work and whatever. For me, the
biggest thing that has helped my life is learning to
(02:16):
be okay with the choices that I have made. So
whether or not my choice was to be home all
day with my kids or I had to go travel
for a speech for a few days and I missed
out on something really great, regardless, I know that I'm
okay now, my kids are okay. Now we're both going
(02:40):
to be okay, and the choices that I make they
were the best for me and my family at that time.
I feel like it's easy to say, like, oh, it's
you know, you choose your heart, and I believe in
that one hundred percent. But choosing your heart still hurts.
But for me, it's an active process in learning to
(03:03):
just accept and own those choices that I've made. In
one way that I've done this is I call my
hats like I have my mom hat, my podcast hat,
my social media hat, my speech hat, my athlete hat,
and where whatever it is that I'm doing, like right
now podcasting, that is my hat. I'm not thinking about
my training. I'm not thinking about social media. I'm not
(03:24):
thinking about being a mom right now, I am thinking
about podcasting. And at the end of the day, when
everything is said and done, I put on my mom
hat and I'm not thinking about podcasting. I'm not thinking
about social media. I'm not thinking about being an athlete.
Right now. My mom hat is on and that's where
I'm at. And for me, that has been the biggest
like change with my athletic career, because I mean, you
(03:47):
have to be on, like I can't think about anything
else when I'm in a startgate, because that's not going
to be good for my performance. So what I have
done is like okay, boom, when I'm in a starting date,
I'm athlete hat and so that has helped me kind
of maintain boundaries for what I can take on or
(04:08):
put on my plate in that moment. But I will say,
there are times where I drop the ball and I
mess up or I'm you know, not where my brain is,
not where it's supposed to be. I'm maybe being a mom,
but I'm thinking about, oh my gosh, a million bajillion
things I have to do. And there are days where,
(04:30):
oh my goodness, three four days, it gets ahead of
me and it gets and then I start to get
stressed out and I burnout or whatever it is. But
one thing that I have learned to really I don't know,
I guess be okay or whatever, just not beat myself
up and be in shame, is how do I recover?
(04:51):
Like I already know, I've already accepted, I allowed myself
to accept and to know that sometimes I'm going to
get it wrong. I'm going to drop the ball, I'm
going to get stressed, I'm gonna get anxious, I'm gonna
mess up. And instead of trying to fight that, and
instead of being better than that, and instead of beating
myself up because I didn't do whatever I needed to do,
ask myself, Okay, how can I best recover from this situation?
(05:14):
How can I get back on track? If you're listening
to this and you're not a parent, and you're like, Okay, uh,
this is great, Brenda, but I'm not a mom, I
feel like this goes for anything in life. It doesn't
have to be parenting. It could be relationships with friends.
It could be you know your animal, that you have
your pet and holding space for making sure that that
your animal has a good life. Whatever it is, like
(05:36):
work life balance is so real for so many of us.
I know that even just maintaining a household as a
single person, as a family, whatever it is, that requires
a lot of time, energy and effort. And that is
another thing where it's like, what is what needs to
be done? What is my standard of living? And then
what routines can I build around it? So like my struggle,
(05:59):
especially right now, just we're in the thick of life.
I'm traveling all the time, my husband works like it's
a lot, it's busy, and I'm like okay. Well, yeah,
there are gonna be days where I think my house
is absolutely filthy, and that's gonna be okay, and I
will clean it the second that I have the time,
and that's my routine. I'm like, all right, it's gonna
be a little messy, we're gonna pick up what we
(06:20):
can at night, and then one day a week or
who whatever time allows, I'm gonna deep clean it. And
that's it. And that's the cycle, and it works for us.
And I think there's so much pressure on doing it
all and having it all, being it all, But when
you really step back and you say, okay, but like
what is realistic for me? Like what do I need
to do? And like doing that and being okay with it,
(06:43):
I think is the most important thing. I saw this
video and I cannot remember the woman, and she was
telling us about like cycles and being okay with those cycles.
For instance, laundry cycles, like okay, you have your dirty clothes,
they go in the basket, they go in the washer,
dry you put them away, you wear them. They go
in the basket, they go in the washirt, dryer, put
(07:04):
them away, wear them basket And it's a cycle of
clothing it's not all meant to be done all the time.
There are places that it lives within that cycle, and
that's where they belong. Like trying to say that you're
gonna have all your laundry done all the time is
just unrealistic because you're gonna wear them, you're gonna put
them away, you're gonna wash them, you're gonna dry them,
you know what I mean. And I feel like I've
been looking at my life in you know, zooming out
(07:27):
and seeing other ways that that cycle exists, and that's cleaning,
that's emails and whatever it is, Like, I have that
cycle and it works for me. And if it doesn't
work for me, then how do I recover? How do
I fix it? How do I get into a new routine,
how do I get into a new habit, And how
do I recover when it all goes to hell? Because
it probably will. Speaking of recovering, speaking of cycles, one
(07:50):
thing that is really real in my life right now
is these transitions. We all are gonna have transitions in
our life, whether that's a career transition, a life transition,
a life alteringperience, transition, your kids transition. Navigating transitions are
a natural, normal part of life, and we're so lucky
that we get to do them because that means we're
growing and changing and shifting. However, with all transitions, I
(08:13):
mean comes growing pains in my opinion, and all those
things that worked for you once no longer work for
you anymore. And one thing that really really helped me
though I still have to work on it. I want
everyone to know I'm still working on all of these things.
Like you, it's always a work in progress. That's a
part of my cycle in life is I'm always trying
to be better and do better, and everything is always
(08:35):
a learning experience. But anyway, one thing is like these
transitions and also just being in the season that I'm in.
I have an aunt who came into our life later
as when I was an adult, and she was telling
me about how she had to wait she had kids
young like me. Now she's in her sixties, and she
(08:57):
showed me, like, be in the season that you're in,
because it'll come. What you're looking for will come, you know,
And that that has really it's been hard, especially with
social media and you have access to how everyone else
is doing in life, and you feel less than or whatever.
But that is something I have been leaning into significantly
(09:18):
is being like, well, the season of life that I
am in right now is I am mom, I am
I've got two little kids. It goes so fast. I
have you know, I want to have those relationships, I
want to have those memories, but I also want to
have this career that I dream of and I want
(09:39):
it all right now, yesterday. And when I get stuck
in that pattern of trying to be the best at
whatever it is I'm doing all the things I'm doing,
I start to burn out. I'm not taking care of myself.
My boundaries are blurred. I am when my kids are whole,
(10:00):
I'm thinking about the things I should be doing with work,
And when I'm at work, I'm thinking about all the
times that I missed out home with my kids because
I'm fighting that season of life that I'm in right now.
The season of life that I am in is mom
to two little girls who are not going to need
me the same way in ten years, maybe not even
in five years, and so challenging myself to stay put,
(10:28):
to be where I am now is difficult. But I
know that it's going to change. We're going to transition.
I'm going to have more time for my careers. I'm
going to have less time as a mom, like and
that is so beautiful and so sad, and I'm like, oh,
it's difficult. But at the same time, like when you
(10:50):
allow yourself to be in that season and to write
out those new transitions, like that work life balance helps
so much because you know it's not forever. You know
this heart is not forever, or at least that's what
I tell myself and I remind myself of, especially when
I'm traveling and for snowboarding or for speaking, and I'm like, man,
(11:12):
I'm missing out so much on my kids. I know
A am going to be back home and be the
part of my life right now. What I prioritize is
when I'm home, I'm home. And yeah, I could be
more ambitious, I could be networking, I could be doing
all the things when I'm home, but I would rather
be with my children and savor those sweet special moments.
(11:32):
And so all of this to say is wherever you
are in life right now and whatever season you're in,
it's going to change. And when we can accept where
we are and be in it, it makes that work
life balance, It makes all of that a lot easier.
I agree, it is easier said than done. It is
(11:53):
a constant work in progress. I am constantly talking about
it with my therapist. But I have noticed a signal
significant improvement in my quality of life the moment that
I leaned into whatever season I was in, And so
it all depends on what hats I have, and one
day that mom hat is going to be less used,
and that's so sad, but also I'm so blessed that
(12:16):
I got to wear it, even for however long I did.
I think I want to keep this up so pretty
short and sweet because there's not really a whole lot
to it. I feel like the more that we beat
this into our heads, the more complicated it is. But
it doesn't need to be. Really. I feel like a
work life balance is all about choosing your heart, learning
(12:39):
to be okay and accept the choices that you make,
learning where to give, when to give you're all, and
learning to accept what season of life that you are
in and knowing that it's going to change. You're going
to pivot. Seasons change, and it's beautiful and it's exciting,
(13:00):
but it doesn't mean it's easy. But I feel like
the more we lean into where we are in this moment,
the easier it is when things shift and when things change.
And so I just wanted to thank you guys so
much for being a part of this episode with me today.
I would love to hear from you, leave a comment
or DM me on Instagram what stood out the most
(13:23):
to you. And if you guys would be so kind
to leave a review or a star on my podcast,
that would be greatly appreciated. I love just showing up
and getting to share with you guys how I've navigated
gold medal wins with being a mom and an amputee
and a cancer survivor and oh my goodness, whatever other
(13:46):
hats I have. My hat closet is full. But I'm
really really excited and blessed to just you get to
show up and share with you guys, because that's where
my passion's at and that's where my heart's at. So
thank you for being a part of that, all right,
and I will see you guys on the next episode.
fIF
Hello, my friends, Welcome back to another episode. I am
so excited to talk to you guys today about one
of my number one topics that I got asked when
I'm either on the road or on a panel, and
it's how do I maintain work life balance? Now. The
reason that this is one of my favorite topics is
because it is literally so hard to answer. It is
(00:24):
so hard to do. But I also think that it
is so important to talk about because when we really
get honest about how we are maintaining these quote unquote
work life balances, we can start to feel a lot
better about how we're navigating our own journey. Because here's
the thing, and I firmly believe this. Nobody has it
(00:47):
one hundred percent all together all of the time, and
if they do, they're lying. I refuse to believe it.
So with that in mind, I'm going to share with
you how I maintain a work life balance for my life,
for my family. And one of the challenges that I
have regarding my line of work is it is so
(01:10):
rare to have a consistent schedule. So if you have
a consistent schedule, I feel like it might be a
little bit easier to schedule out time with your family
or hold those boundaries of unplugging. But with my world,
I don't have that, and so I want to share
with you guys how I navigate being a mom, doing
the podcast, social media, traveling for snowboarding speeches, all of
(01:35):
the things that I'm doing. How do I navigate that
with being a happy, healthy mom and also a happy
healthy wife. That is also a challenge is maintaining a
relationship with your partner. So anyway, how can we have
it all? I think the biggest thing that I have
(01:55):
done in my life to be okay and to feel
confident with me my work life balance isn't necessarily being like, oh,
I'm going to do twenty five percent mom in today
and sixty five percent work and whatever. For me, the
biggest thing that has helped my life is learning to
(02:16):
be okay with the choices that I have made. So
whether or not my choice was to be home all
day with my kids or I had to go travel
for a speech for a few days and I missed
out on something really great, regardless, I know that I'm
okay now, my kids are okay. Now we're both going
(02:40):
to be okay, and the choices that I make they
were the best for me and my family at that time.
I feel like it's easy to say, like, oh, it's
you know, you choose your heart, and I believe in
that one hundred percent. But choosing your heart still hurts.
But for me, it's an active process in learning to
(03:03):
just accept and own those choices that I've made. In
one way that I've done this is I call my
hats like I have my mom hat, my podcast hat,
my social media hat, my speech hat, my athlete hat,
and where whatever it is that I'm doing, like right
now podcasting, that is my hat. I'm not thinking about
my training. I'm not thinking about social media. I'm not
(03:24):
thinking about being a mom right now, I am thinking
about podcasting. And at the end of the day, when
everything is said and done, I put on my mom
hat and I'm not thinking about podcasting. I'm not thinking
about social media. I'm not thinking about being an athlete.
Right now. My mom hat is on and that's where
I'm at. And for me, that has been the biggest
like change with my athletic career, because I mean, you
(03:47):
have to be on, like I can't think about anything
else when I'm in a startgate, because that's not going
to be good for my performance. So what I have
done is like okay, boom, when I'm in a starting date,
I'm athlete hat and so that has helped me kind
of maintain boundaries for what I can take on or
(04:08):
put on my plate in that moment. But I will say,
there are times where I drop the ball and I
mess up or I'm you know, not where my brain is,
not where it's supposed to be. I'm maybe being a mom,
but I'm thinking about, oh my gosh, a million bajillion
things I have to do. And there are days where,
(04:30):
oh my goodness, three four days, it gets ahead of
me and it gets and then I start to get
stressed out and I burnout or whatever it is. But
one thing that I have learned to really I don't know,
I guess be okay or whatever, just not beat myself
up and be in shame, is how do I recover?
(04:51):
Like I already know, I've already accepted, I allowed myself
to accept and to know that sometimes I'm going to
get it wrong. I'm going to drop the ball, I'm
going to get stressed, I'm gonna get anxious, I'm gonna
mess up. And instead of trying to fight that, and
instead of being better than that, and instead of beating
myself up because I didn't do whatever I needed to do,
ask myself, Okay, how can I best recover from this situation?
(05:14):
How can I get back on track? If you're listening
to this and you're not a parent, and you're like, Okay, uh,
this is great, Brenda, but I'm not a mom, I
feel like this goes for anything in life. It doesn't
have to be parenting. It could be relationships with friends.
It could be you know your animal, that you have
your pet and holding space for making sure that that
your animal has a good life. Whatever it is, like
(05:36):
work life balance is so real for so many of us.
I know that even just maintaining a household as a
single person, as a family, whatever it is, that requires
a lot of time, energy and effort. And that is
another thing where it's like, what is what needs to
be done? What is my standard of living? And then
what routines can I build around it? So like my struggle,
(05:59):
especially right now, just we're in the thick of life.
I'm traveling all the time, my husband works like it's
a lot, it's busy, and I'm like okay. Well, yeah,
there are gonna be days where I think my house
is absolutely filthy, and that's gonna be okay, and I
will clean it the second that I have the time,
and that's my routine. I'm like, all right, it's gonna
be a little messy, we're gonna pick up what we
(06:20):
can at night, and then one day a week or
who whatever time allows, I'm gonna deep clean it. And
that's it. And that's the cycle, and it works for us.
And I think there's so much pressure on doing it
all and having it all, being it all, But when
you really step back and you say, okay, but like
what is realistic for me? Like what do I need
to do? And like doing that and being okay with it,
(06:43):
I think is the most important thing. I saw this
video and I cannot remember the woman, and she was
telling us about like cycles and being okay with those cycles.
For instance, laundry cycles, like okay, you have your dirty clothes,
they go in the basket, they go in the washer,
dry you put them away, you wear them. They go
in the basket, they go in the washirt, dryer, put
(07:04):
them away, wear them basket And it's a cycle of
clothing it's not all meant to be done all the time.
There are places that it lives within that cycle, and
that's where they belong. Like trying to say that you're
gonna have all your laundry done all the time is
just unrealistic because you're gonna wear them, you're gonna put
them away, you're gonna wash them, you're gonna dry them,
you know what I mean. And I feel like I've
been looking at my life in you know, zooming out
(07:27):
and seeing other ways that that cycle exists, and that's cleaning,
that's emails and whatever it is, Like, I have that
cycle and it works for me. And if it doesn't
work for me, then how do I recover? How do
I fix it? How do I get into a new routine,
how do I get into a new habit, And how
do I recover when it all goes to hell? Because
it probably will. Speaking of recovering, speaking of cycles, one
(07:50):
thing that is really real in my life right now
is these transitions. We all are gonna have transitions in
our life, whether that's a career transition, a life transition,
a life alteringperience, transition, your kids transition. Navigating transitions are
a natural, normal part of life, and we're so lucky
that we get to do them because that means we're
growing and changing and shifting. However, with all transitions, I
(08:13):
mean comes growing pains in my opinion, and all those
things that worked for you once no longer work for
you anymore. And one thing that really really helped me
though I still have to work on it. I want
everyone to know I'm still working on all of these things.
Like you, it's always a work in progress. That's a
part of my cycle in life is I'm always trying
to be better and do better, and everything is always
(08:35):
a learning experience. But anyway, one thing is like these
transitions and also just being in the season that I'm in.
I have an aunt who came into our life later
as when I was an adult, and she was telling
me about how she had to wait she had kids
young like me. Now she's in her sixties, and she
(08:57):
showed me, like, be in the season that you're in,
because it'll come. What you're looking for will come, you know,
And that that has really it's been hard, especially with
social media and you have access to how everyone else
is doing in life, and you feel less than or whatever.
But that is something I have been leaning into significantly
(09:18):
is being like, well, the season of life that I
am in right now is I am mom, I am
I've got two little kids. It goes so fast. I
have you know, I want to have those relationships, I
want to have those memories, but I also want to
have this career that I dream of and I want
(09:39):
it all right now, yesterday. And when I get stuck
in that pattern of trying to be the best at
whatever it is I'm doing all the things I'm doing,
I start to burn out. I'm not taking care of myself.
My boundaries are blurred. I am when my kids are whole,
(10:00):
I'm thinking about the things I should be doing with work,
And when I'm at work, I'm thinking about all the
times that I missed out home with my kids because
I'm fighting that season of life that I'm in right now.
The season of life that I am in is mom
to two little girls who are not going to need
me the same way in ten years, maybe not even
in five years, and so challenging myself to stay put,
(10:28):
to be where I am now is difficult. But I
know that it's going to change. We're going to transition.
I'm going to have more time for my careers. I'm
going to have less time as a mom, like and
that is so beautiful and so sad, and I'm like, oh,
it's difficult. But at the same time, like when you
(10:50):
allow yourself to be in that season and to write
out those new transitions, like that work life balance helps
so much because you know it's not forever. You know
this heart is not forever, or at least that's what
I tell myself and I remind myself of, especially when
I'm traveling and for snowboarding or for speaking, and I'm like, man,
(11:12):
I'm missing out so much on my kids. I know
A am going to be back home and be the
part of my life right now. What I prioritize is
when I'm home, I'm home. And yeah, I could be
more ambitious, I could be networking, I could be doing
all the things when I'm home, but I would rather
be with my children and savor those sweet special moments.
(11:32):
And so all of this to say is wherever you
are in life right now and whatever season you're in,
it's going to change. And when we can accept where
we are and be in it, it makes that work
life balance, It makes all of that a lot easier.
I agree, it is easier said than done. It is
(11:53):
a constant work in progress. I am constantly talking about
it with my therapist. But I have noticed a signal
significant improvement in my quality of life the moment that
I leaned into whatever season I was in, And so
it all depends on what hats I have, and one
day that mom hat is going to be less used,
and that's so sad, but also I'm so blessed that
(12:16):
I got to wear it, even for however long I did.
I think I want to keep this up so pretty
short and sweet because there's not really a whole lot
to it. I feel like the more that we beat
this into our heads, the more complicated it is. But
it doesn't need to be. Really. I feel like a
work life balance is all about choosing your heart, learning
(12:39):
to be okay and accept the choices that you make,
learning where to give, when to give you're all, and
learning to accept what season of life that you are
in and knowing that it's going to change. You're going
to pivot. Seasons change, and it's beautiful and it's exciting,
(13:00):
but it doesn't mean it's easy. But I feel like
the more we lean into where we are in this moment,
the easier it is when things shift and when things change.
And so I just wanted to thank you guys so
much for being a part of this episode with me today.
I would love to hear from you, leave a comment
or DM me on Instagram what stood out the most
(13:23):
to you. And if you guys would be so kind
to leave a review or a star on my podcast,
that would be greatly appreciated. I love just showing up
and getting to share with you guys how I've navigated
gold medal wins with being a mom and an amputee
and a cancer survivor and oh my goodness, whatever other
(13:46):
hats I have. My hat closet is full. But I'm
really really excited and blessed to just you get to
show up and share with you guys, because that's where
my passion's at and that's where my heart's at. So
thank you for being a part of that, all right,
and I will see you guys on the next episode.
fIF
Host
Brenna Huckaby
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Are You A Charlotte?
In 1997, actress Kristin Davis’ life was forever changed when she took on the role of Charlotte York in Sex and the City. As we watched Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte navigate relationships in NYC, the show helped push once unacceptable conversation topics out of the shadows and altered the narrative around women and sex. We all saw ourselves in them as they searched for fulfillment in life, sex and friendships. Now, Kristin Davis wants to connect with you, the fans, and share untold stories and all the behind the scenes. Together, with Kristin and special guests, what will begin with Sex and the City will evolve into talks about themes that are still so relevant today. "Are you a Charlotte?" is much more than just rewatching this beloved show, it brings the past and the present together as we talk with heart, humor and of course some optimism.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.