February 9, 2023 • 43 mins
“There are so many types of love. So why do we only want to talk about the type of love where you have to put your mouth on somebody? There's other loves where you don't put your mouth on anybody.”- Dulcé Sloan
“It's the one time a year, outside of an anniversary, where you can really flex on the person that you love. It's an opportunity to just be like, "Oh, I can take you to the next level, girl." - Josh Johnson
Is Valentine’s Day a celebration of romantic love or all types of love? Find out this week on Hold Up with Daily Show correspondent Dulcé Sloan and writer Josh Johnson.
Click here for Dulcé’s tour dates: https://www.dailyshow.com/dulcesloan
Click here for Josh’s tour dates: https://www.dailyshow.com/joshjohnson
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Asked someone who got engaged on Valentine's Day. It's corny
and ship because when you asked me, I was excited.
At the same time, I was like, nigger, really Valentine's
Uh huh, what a basic ass move is this? Wow?
(00:23):
Welcome everyone to hold up the show. That's a whole
lot about it, very little. I am one of your
co hosts. My name is Josh Johnson, and I am
joined by those love you could could do do je
(00:51):
So you're just not gonna say what you do at
all already? Oh yeah, it's those like so cresparted for
the Daily Show. I do the voice of honey Bee
on The Great North. I produce Lavo Sharpe's One Woman's show,
Don't Reach in the Bag? Um, I get residual checks.
What else do I do? My mom doesn't work, She's
got two phones. It's great. Um, I'm a cat lover
(01:14):
because dogs are booted. Okay, Well, I'm very happy for you.
And this show is where you and I debate topics
that people need to be discussing all the time. We're like, oh,
this government thing, NATO. People don't know what NATO is.
(01:34):
People don't know some people know what NATO is. Like
we can at least the Peter with NATO know what
NATO is. You know how many people all right Nato?
I think at least a handful some people know what
NATO is? Yeah, but like what's Unesco? What's the world?
(02:02):
W the G eight? What do they do? This is
why we have this show so we don't have to
talk about serious things like that. You know, and the
G five is And I can tell you it's not
a plane. It's just regular, you know, everyday things that
we feel passionately about that people actually do know about.
(02:23):
You know. Today's Today's is close to our hearts in
in a in a figurative and a literal sense. Today's
topic is Valentine's Day? Romantic can you be? Or is
it not? How sad can you be? I February? So
(02:44):
doun't say tell the people which what you landed on?
So for Valentine's Day, I feel like that it shouldn't
be only on the romantic code, right, I don't think
it has to be only I just think that it is.
But I don't think that was what it was for originally. Well, no,
that's not true, it was for that originally. I'm saying
(03:06):
that there are so many types of love, so why
do we only want to talk about the love. Well,
you have to put your mouth on somebody, there's other loves.
You don't put your mouth on anybody. Oh yeah, yeah,
I see what you mean. I mean I landed on
the romantic side just because I think that it's the
one time a year outside of an anniversary where you
(03:30):
can really flex on the person that you love. It
it's birthday, well know what I mean? Those are just
like those are for everybody. So anybody that you have
in your life that's close to you, you should be
getting a Christmas present, but you don't have. Yeah, you
could flex on Christmas. I'm just saying, it's like this
is a romantic one. This is like the don't hand
(03:53):
on February. There's Alexus December to remember because it's your
buy your love when alexis for Christmas? Right, because they
want your flex hard. Ain't no car companies coming up
during the Valentine's Day, Like, hey, body's fine wines for
the Valentine's or you know what is it, Hey, don't
(04:15):
steal that for me. Don't steal that for me. Don't
do that. Yeah, there definitely are now now that you
said it, now that you've given it to them on
an audio platter, thank you so much. And just your ears,
I know, like for like my mom, every one Valentine's
Day would give me and my brother presence because it's
(04:38):
about the lou My mom did something similar. Yeah, your
mother is the first person who loves you, right, yeah,
and she's your first Valentine and everything. I get you.
But I'm just saying that now as an adult, you know,
Valentine's Days is an opportunity two just be like, oh,
I can take you to the next level girl and see.
(05:02):
But what Valentine's They does that it leaves out the
single people. It makes them said like, if you don't
think I cry to a Valentine's Day, you're at your
damn mine. I'm with you. I'm with you. I'm not
saying that you use it. This is what I this
is what I've even said this in stand up before.
For every couple that posts like a selfie of them
(05:24):
on Valentine's Day with like the chocolates and the flowers
and all this stuff like that, and oh my gosh,
he proposed whatever you should legally have to also post
one of you fighting like that, like that should also
because that's the reality. It's like, you know, there's a
there's a day where you're nothing but killing it and
there's a day where you want to kill each other.
(05:45):
That's just normal life, right, Because as someone who got
engaged on Valentine's Day, it's corny and ship Compluteing asked me,
I was excited at the same time, I was like, nigger,
really Valentine's Uh huh, what a basic ass move is this? Wow? Okay,
(06:13):
I mean, I said, yes, it was still a corny
but I mean but also after a month I broke
off the engagement and a month after then I broke
up with him completely. What I'm saying is that she
was corny. She was corny. I think it makes more
people sad than it does happy, is what I personally believe.
Like you think so yes, because like every year on
Valentine's Day, I give out Valentine's to my friends. I
(06:35):
go and find like the little kid Valentine's used to
get in like elementary school, or I'll make something. I
go to Michael's and get like the little like uh
the little craft kits and make like a little like
Valentine or something, or I go to the dollar tree,
like you know, I did it for you at work
one time I came up look gift back and see
do I make one for everybody? No? Yea, So now
(06:57):
I have to like do some fun ones because I
made some valent lines in lockdown, not like no, when
we're still working at home, and I made some shout
out to Cricket for sending me a cricket joy um.
And I was making them and I was making like
shaker ones, and they weren't coming out the way I
wanted them to. And I was afraid to send them
to people because because they take them by of the envelope.
(07:17):
And then then I glitter all over their house and sidebar,
have you seen the video of the girl whose boyfriend
cheated on her and she threw glitter all over his
fucking house? No, like she And it wasn't like the
little things of glitter you get like the like when
you were a kid. This is like restaurant seasoning size
(07:40):
containers of glitter. And she went through every room in
his house and the carpet too, and she had various
kid bottles with her various colors, and so I'm talking
about she went in the bed and went through the sheets,
letter in the tubs, so unnecessary, all the things. Now,
(08:03):
I don't think. So it's just like I get it,
I get it, then leave, then leave and not not
really she she left. She left later what I said,
And I saw a quote that said, uh, she broke
nothing but destroyed everything. Yeah, I mean, if you like,
(08:24):
here's the thing glitter in his deviled eggs. Yes, that's hilarious,
Like glitter in the kitchen means glitter and all the food.
I'm with you. I mean, this is a man. It
was a he's a white man's house, and she wouldn't
like she threw glitter in the refrigerator. But it was nothing.
But it hit nothing. Yeah, just hit the catchup bottle.
It just hit egg catchup bottle and two cans of
Coca Cola and a six pack of here because it
(08:46):
was a white man's house. I'm not to say that
they don't. But he's also an early twenty so he
survives off of cereal. Um. Busting out windows, yeah, going
full carry underwood yeah, yeah is a felony. Uh if
you cheat on somebody, should you sunk up their ship?
I don't know, right, someone cheats on you, I guide
(09:08):
you on me to funk up a ship. No, because
I know he's still a worthless human being. Time got
back at him for me. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
But like the moment, in the moment, yeah, I wanted to.
The thing is the way the reason that happened sucked
me up so bad? Is that the story you're getting
retold to me because like, oh, I felt guilty. I
(09:30):
was lying the last time I told you what happened. Actually,
this is what happened. And I'm like, every time I
started moving past it was like it was crazy. Every
time I was like, I was like, okay, I forgave
him and I started moving past it. He Actually that's
not the way it went down. This is how it
went down. I'm just like, bro, shut up. Yeah yeah,
(09:51):
I mean, if anything, that's the glitter of that's like
the glitter of like memory, you know, right, But it's like,
why are you antagonizing me? I got us completely off
task like I usually do, because we were talking about
like cheating and stuff like that, because I got proposed
(10:12):
to Valentine's Day? Corny ass bullshit. Yeah, do you think
that with Valentine's Day? How about this? They're there are
gestures that I think I agree or like very corny.
I think that, um Like, I'm not saying everyone should
make their Valentine's Day a secret, but I do think
a lot of it is uh is best left to
(10:35):
like the couple that's in it, because what you end
up doing is in sharing your love, you end up
showing people how like unsettling y'all are? Do you know
what I'm saying. It's like the thing in high school
where the girl I was walking on all the balloons
with the guys walking on all the stuff. Or it's
(10:55):
like a couple who like they they do way too
much on Valentine's Day. Yeah, so I think it's a
romantic holiday and I think that that to me, it
makes sense. Like even when I've been single, I've been like, Okay,
well good for them, you know what I mean. But
I think that it also does give the opportunity for
(11:15):
people to really show off that they might be out
of their minds. I mean, I think every day is
an opportunity that you were out of your mind, and
if you're not using every day an opportunity to show
people m that you're out of your mind. Okay, are
(11:35):
you living your best life? I are you reaching your
full potential as a human being? Are you doing the work?
Are you being the best you for you? Are you
asking real questions? Right now? I can't tell anymore. I
(11:59):
mean the first one was a little wild, and then
they just got progressively more insane. I just saying that
in my life I've spent I'm thirty nine years old,
so there have been like thirty eight thirty nine Valentine's
(12:21):
Days in my life. One through fifteen, I guess can't
count because I was a child. One through doesn't count,
so one through doesn't count. So I'm talking sixteen to
thirty nine, right, twenty three years right out them, twenty
three years, I've probably had maybe five good Valentine's Days
(12:47):
if I had one at all, five good ones, okay, five,
just five, and gently just five. Had the opportunity to
experience of Valentine's Day with a significant other, so I
don't have to experience the frame of reference. Um, and
I'm trying to sound like a hater, but I also
(13:08):
wanted to be like, you know, in the spirit of transparency,
there's nothing, there's something there's an intersection. There's a really
beautiful intersection where, um, I don't know, let me, let
(13:28):
me figure out the best way to describe this. Where
people take sort of office see like rhetoric or or
like office language, and they incorporate either that or incorporate
that into blackness. That makes for beautiful turns of phrase,
(13:48):
like like really, like do you do you see what
I mean? Because in the spirit of feels very like
a CEO was about to tell you that we're out
of money, right, but when you said transparency, there was
something that was like that was like, yeah, I think
that this is what corporate America has been missing. It's
just a black woman at the top of Like, in
(14:10):
the spirit of transparency, I want to let all of
you know that you no longer have jobs, you know,
because right now the emails read very cold. They don't
read with that sort of uplifting Sunday morning gospel, no
warmth type of vibe, no warmth right, yeah, and that's
why I laughed so hard at in the spirit of
(14:31):
parents see for me, in the spirit of I feel
like it's a black thing, and then transparency is the
work thing. Okay, yeah, but you see that's what I mean.
I'm like, I don't know which thing is, but they're
they're they're molding together. The melding up things, Yes, is
in the spiritful transparency. Also, it's also the name of
the group chat of Um all of us on me
and my friends with the Bahamas, not with you. I
(14:53):
always said one text I was I was in the thing.
I didn't go to the Bamas. And I remember I
I said what text of Everybody was like, it's a bit, Josh.
I wanted to be like, yeah, I know. I was
trying to help. I was like, Josh did good, Josh
did good. Everybody was like, no, you are here. It's
(15:14):
a bit. I'm like all right, And I was like,
we don't have to do like that. I was sitting
by the pool and y'all had to my friend like that,
sitting there drinking. JAD like, hey, you have to do
my friend. I think I'm not trying to sound like
(15:35):
a hater, but I just spent so many Valentine's Days just,
you know, not enjoying it. There was other people enjoyed it,
and I think a lot of people feel that there
is a pressure. I also know if you first there's
also a lot of times where I've I've met someone
(15:55):
like right before Valentine's Day, that's my favorite, like two
three weeks way to close. Like when I met the
mechanic it was like the end of January, and he
did give me a card. In the front of it said, um,
I like you, and then we opened the insid and
(16:16):
it's all your fault, which is very much him. Um
may no longer have it. I ripped it up and
throw it away. But but it is a cute card.
It's in the moment in on Valentine's Day twenty two
thousand seven. The sentiment was enjoyed by the following year
(16:40):
and the stubbs the point of years he had a
great way of not being very dependable around that holiday.
But that is neither hither nor thither. Um. I will
say that there does seem to be a convenient Uh,
there's a kind venient type of argument or trip, like
(17:08):
something tends to happen. Sometimes broke dudes will start an
argument with you before Valentine's Day so they can use
the excuse to not get you anything, and then, you know,
very conveniently reconcile after the holiday, leaving them to therefore
think that they are not responsible for giving you anything
(17:32):
for Valentine's Day. I think it just like us a
lot of pressure. Like there were a couple of comics
for this one. I was like, he said, if it
wasn't for me giving him something, it was five years
in a world that I gave him something a Valentine's
Day and it was the only thing you ever got,
he said. He said he always looked forward because he said,
he said, I knew if I didn't get anything, I
knew I would get a card from you, m hm,
(17:53):
which I always thought was nice because it's like it
was very sweet. Yeah, because it's like some people don't
get things and it's like it's we want to act
like that's like, oh, it doesn't matter, but it's like
it does make you sad. Yes, it definitely can make
you sad in in that comparison, but I guess I
also say that there is something to like having having
(18:18):
a thing that like My initial point is I think
that Valentine's Day can and deserves to be romantic because
it's a it's an extra thing outside of uh, your
anniversary or birthday or just cause that can be you know,
a nice night out or like an opportunity to do
(18:42):
something nice for each other. The the overall um projection
out to the world is where I think both to me,
makes people sad, shows people off that they're crazy, and
creates a weird uh level of comparison, even between couples.
So the way that I'll admit that Valentine's Day can
(19:03):
be toxic is, um, there was this time my buddy
was out to a dinner with his girlfriend. Right, this
is like and it was one of those um, what
do you call it? It was. It was one of
those prefixed menus for Valentine's Day. So it's nothing but
(19:25):
couples in the restaurant, right, another couple couples right, old
old hall a bit everything, right, but in the middle
of dinner service, which is pretty much nine pm, So
everybody that came in an eight that that might be
about to leave, everybody that's getting there at nine, and
people walking in for their nine thirty, this dude gets
on one knee and proposes to his girlfriend and just
(19:50):
ruined Valentine's Day for everybody else left in the restaurant,
because think about it, it's like you got her a
little bracelet or whatever. This dude got her commitment, and
you just gotta sit there for the next hour to
have be like, so do you like your fish? He
ruined everybody else's romantic evening. That's how my friend described it.
(20:15):
He was like it sucked all the air out the
room because every dude in the room was like, God, dang, like,
why you gotta do that? You can't do that outside.
You gotta do it in the middle of different Yeah,
like yes, absolutely, just staring like all right, abrace, it's nice,
it's not a rain. But also there's probably some women
(20:38):
in there would be like, God, I hope he doesn't
do that to me. Now I'm with you. I mean
he can't. Now imagine if you're the third person to
propose in the same restaurant and one night, how embarrassing
that ship would be. That would actually be wild. Is
like I also have something to say, might as well
keep clapping? Do it? Sucking spartacus hmm. I saw this
(21:03):
name and this guy like was like in the middle
of the mall right, and he bit down on one knee.
So you see him bent down on one knee, but
he's holding the ring in one hand, but his he's
hold the ring in his head is down and then
you see the girl walking away, right, So she obviously
(21:26):
said no m and then the caption read she could
have just said yes and changed her mind later. She
didn't have to embarrass someone's son in public like that.
And then the next comment was like the next comment,
but I think it was like some woman going, first
of all, fuck you. This is more of a the
(21:49):
toxic mindset that we have towards women, because it's just like, so,
you wanted this girl to say yes to him, to
trick him. So a group of people didn't. So the
group a straight dingers, Yeah, he's either gonna be embarrassed
now or embarrassed later. Right, didn't hear her say no?
It was like someone else said, It's like he probably
embarrassed her because now she has to tell him no
(22:12):
in public. Yeah. Like this is the thing where it
just like we're just it's like that was someone's first
reaction to singing this because oh my god, she embarrassed him.
I'll even pitch you this, right. I think we should
keep Valentine's Day romantic. That's my side of the argument.
But I do think we should take some of the
(22:32):
mystery out of proposals because too many people, too many
people are over here being proposed too wrong or doing
proposals wrong. It's like depending on who you're with, because
a proposal is different than a relationship. There are some
people that are very quiet and very personal that would
actually love a huge gesture, and then there's people there
in the opposite, there are people who were like, maybe
(22:53):
they're in the public eye or whatever, so they want
their their moment like that to be very personal and intimate. Right,
I think guest thing is done because people people don't
play with guessing anymore. So it's like I think that
there needs to be a conversation. It may not even
happen that year. I don't even think it should happen
to me. Obviously it should not happen in the same
(23:13):
week as you're going to do it. But even if
it happens in the same year, I think there needs
to be a conversation way ahead of time of like
what do you think about you know, proposals, or what
do you think about this type of proposal or whatever,
because then you at least get a sense because now
if somebody's embarrassed, that's on them because they told you
that's the type of thing that they liked. Yeah, I
(23:35):
did see something online where someone was like eat her
and her significant other talked about like, this is the
kind of ring I want ring. I want to take
the mestry out of it. You want to be happy,
tell us what you want about the number of people
that have been proposed to that are walking around with
(23:55):
a ring they didn't want ugly ring, but you don't.
You're supposed to ask because someone's mom or someone's friend
and all the other ship. But you got a ring
you didn't want. You got a big gesture and you
didn't want one, or you got a little gesture and
you want a big one. You know. It's uh, I'm
fully with you. There should be no photographer that hot. Yeah,
(24:17):
I think. But also it's like because when I got proposed,
so I didn't know it was coming mm hmm. But
I start proposed in a bedroom. So but I also
feel like this this is my thing. You got proposed
that I didn't have a shirt. I did mine offense,
(24:43):
neither did he. That would be wild if he came
into the suit that you don't have a shirt. He
was like, I'm wearing a bra right now? What are
you doing it's crazy? Um No. I think that a
lot of the guests work can be taken out by
genuinely just having all that communication ahead time. I know
(25:06):
it takes some of the mystery out of it, which
is fun for people. But I also think that a
you you either if you want to live in mystery,
you're gonna have to accept the fact that sometimes you're
gonna get something that's not gonna be the way you
want to get it right. Like yeah, when when people
(25:27):
want their birthday to be spontaneous but they give no direction,
it's like, I I hope you like whatever I got,
because the best you know. I think there has to
be more conversations because like a man I was seeing
recently asked me to marry him, like within the past year,
(25:47):
but there was no ring mm hmm, and we were
just casually eating. I do feel like depending on the
type of person or pending on their age, it stops
being less of a proposal and more of just floating ideas.
(26:08):
Because that's what it sounds like happened in your Yeah,
that's kind of he was like, what if we got married,
we should get married. I was like, that's not why
I am here. Well, to be fair though, since that
that still leaves the room to do a proper proposal.
That was him floating the idea. So now if you're like, oh,
(26:31):
I think we could get married, like now, he knows
to do it later. But then it was like I
was like ah, and he was like I want to
marry you, and I was like, okay, we should get married.
All right, retract my previous statement. Yeah, he didn't stop
saying words I thought. Initially I thought he stopped at
(26:56):
that part, and I was like, oh, well then now
you just gotta wait for the countdown until he does.
But it also I was like, I'd only known him
for a month. Yeah, but you can't. Can't blame people
for the effect you have on them. You don't know
the other dude, I knew him for three months. Yeah. Hey,
(27:17):
sometimes people just dive in. Don't question it. I get it.
But it's like, bro, I'm with you. It seems quick
if I say to you more than once, Hey, I'm
just having fun. M h, we're just having fun. I
don't think we're having I don't think he heard what
(27:37):
I was saying. Yeah, but that's more I will say
a lot of people do that though. That's a that's
a huge thing that people have. No matter we always
talk about communication and stuff, some people will actually communicate.
They'll look you in your eye and tell you what
they want and what they need and the other person
just does not receive it. And so so then you
you get into a situation of like, what do you
(27:59):
mean not office is going somewhere. It's like I said
a long time ago, that we're just chilling and then
they and then they have a reaction to it, and
you know what I mean. So, yeah, you can only
you can only control what you do. You know, truly,
you can lead a horse to water, but you can't
make them that proposed to you you don't want to.
(28:25):
I think that we should open up Valentine just to
be like about all kinds of news because thing is Valentine.
There is a celebration of romantic love, right, Okay, Yeah,
when do we celebrate the other kinds of love? Because
I think most people interact with wrong romance, non romantic
(28:46):
love more maybe then you do the other loves. Yeah,
I think you're right because you're you're you, You're a
mom daughter for your whole life. Whereas you're in and
our relationships. I agree with that completely. I just think
that there are days for those other relationships, like Mother's Day,
(29:08):
Father's Day, like Christmas, like you know, even even depending
on your belief system, Easter, you know, like people people
do all there's all about love. It's all about love.
But I'm just saying some people give their friends gifts
on Easter. Some people don't. Who gets gifts on Easter.
I'm not even saying I do. I've just heard of it.
(29:29):
Grown adults are given grown adults gifts on Easter, I guess, so,
I mean it's it's something. It's something I've seen very
very rich people do, so not this is not a
regular thing. I'm just saying it happens. Should I start
giving out time Easter baskets? Just give out peeps to
your enemies from my enemies. There was a comic the
(29:54):
other day that called me his enemy. He's called me
his arch like. He was like, he's like he's Nemesis,
like the Nemesis. And I was like, I don't think
I don't care about you enough to be your nemesis.
I don't even arch my eyebrows when I see you
affect me in no way. I mean, honestly, I think
(30:14):
he just wants to suck me. But it's like, um,
He's like, yeah, you have my nemesis, and I was like, Nigga,
I don't know your last name. You know it. There
are some people, there are some people in this world
that stay in a sort of adversarial lane to their
(30:38):
intended loves. Yeah, I would never Yeah, they more, you
know it. It starts on the playground. It's like it's like, oh,
I think you have cooties. Now they don't finish the sentence.
They're like, I want those cooties, you know. But I
think even even into you know, adulthood, there are some people,
(31:00):
but I hate and grown men do this because it's
a form of nagging, this form of aggression, and what
they don't like is to be met with their aggression
with aggression. It's their aggressive You're supposed to go, nigga,
you are not cute enough. If you're gonna come at
somebody with the nagging thing, you have to know what
(31:23):
lane you are in. You have to know what your
reflection with your faces. You need to know how the
account for your face was set up before you start
coming up to people and doing this nagging ship because
what they don't expect is for you to come back
just it's oh, this is what we're doing, sir. I
(31:44):
was born for this, For this, I'm gonna hurt your
fucking feelings. This nigga said, I look the deadness face
and said how I don't know your last name? When
our friends went damn. I do feel like if the
abe you're in and of itself is negative, it actually
doesn't matter what their face looks like. Oh that's not true.
(32:09):
That's not true. That's not true. What listen if they
because the thing is, if they truly don't know what
they're doing and they're just being truly fucking annoying and negative,
then you're right because it'll make them look less attractive.
If you would have just walked up to me and
said hello, if you put it up this dude that
(32:36):
walked up to you and said hello, paramore, I'd be like, Oho, this.
They gotta give vocabiniers in your back pocket. Come on, buddy,
this they can seemed bridged. Okay, This man enjoys masterpiece
the alright, this man reads a book or three shook
(33:00):
speare that Shakespeare come through. This man is trying to
make the Beast with two backs? You hear me, I
wanna learn about it. I cannot wait, so people google
the Beast with two backs? Um shame speare reference reader.
But but yeah, so that's why I was like, I
think there needs to be more situations we can celebrate
(33:21):
our hands a loop mm hmm, because a lot of
people haven't had great Valentine's Days. And also it's okay,
you got your Mother's Day, you got your Father's Day.
There's other parts of a family. M hmmm, where's your
cousin day? What's your grandparents Day? I guess grandparents get
honored as parents technically get parents. Grandparents tend to also
(33:45):
fall into the mothers and fathers because grandparents get to
double dip because there is Grandparents Day. But we don't
even have shipped for that. Yeah, like not an easy thing,
but we do have a day where if you remember,
you get them something. I didn't know. I don't wonder
where they put Mother's Day and Father's Day when it is.
(34:08):
I wanted to give it enough time apart, Well, why
isn't it made? I guess June didn't have anything. Yeah,
you don't want bankrupt people? Oh yeah, I guess, but like,
how come Father's Day is in September? I don't know.
I mean Father's Day already doesn't really get much to it.
(34:29):
We don't get done. It really is like sad to
watch it really does bumming. I'm not even a dad
and that that bumby out for real, Like it's just
And the funny thing about it is that, like when
you um when you see people complain about it online,
(34:51):
there's always somewhere this like, uh, well moms do all
this other It's like, yeah, that's why everyone respects their
day like this. This is literally just a conversation about
how dad's just get old ties hub caps, like just
whatever was laying around is what you give your dad
(35:11):
is usually something fix. Definitely take your mother out to eat. Yeah,
one Mother's Day do you have? How many dads get
sweaters that they already have the same pattern of Also,
Father's Day is in June? Where the fund did you
get this sweater? Where did you get this sweater? Which
means it's an old sweater. We all know it's an
old sweater because you couldn't give it to him at Christmas?
(35:34):
You you bought two sweaters at Christmas. You gave him
one and then you saved up till Father's Day. Because
that's how little you care about Father's Day. This is
the question. A lot of people don't even call. A
lot of people are like, a right, honestly, that's his fault.
If no one calls, he barely he wasn't a good father. No, no, no,
(35:59):
because if you don't be a better father. No, no, no,
because because if you forget to call your mom a
Mother's Day, that's always all you. Right, Like, if you
forgot to call your mom on Mother's Day, people will
be like, clearly she's not a good mother. It'd be like,
what's with you? Yeah, yeah, So if you don't call
(36:21):
your mother and Mother's Day, you're an asshole. If you
don't got your father and Father's Day, he wasn't a
good dad. It's like, but what if this, if this
is a same family, how is this possible. I'm not
saying it's impossible, but like, come on now, you can't
tell me you you you grew up. This is the
only time we blame anything on men. Is fathering, Like
(36:43):
you didn't do it. It will be wild too, especially
if you did a good job. You'll be there at
everything and then they don't call and this like why,
I guess you didn't grind hard enough. It's like she's
I went to all the games. I don't think what
else is I supposed to do? You don't forget your
dad and if he comes to all the games? No,
some people genuinely I I don't think, like, look, whatever
(37:07):
is not my battle. I'm not saying poor bad, poor bad.
I'm literally just saying the level to which people don't
appreciate when they have a good dad. You know what
I mean, Because let's let's be let's be for real.
If there's a lot of trash dads out there, that
means the good ones should actually have more shine. You know,
I think we celebrate the good ones. What serena dad?
(37:31):
That's that's it. That's that's really Tiger Dad. Like I
don't know, Joe checks see, I'm trying to list only
good dads. Right now, you're still like a um yeah.
(37:54):
By Helen high Water, that clearly his tactics worked truly,
which is the logic that white people use where it's like,
how can you say black people are are having a
hard time? Look at this one black person who yeah
to step on to get where they are. Black people
(38:16):
need to be doing great. Look at Beyonce. She's just
had a whole concert and Dubai and I'm like, bro,
most people don't even know what the Dubai is. Also,
I don't even know any other Beyonce's So that's the
worst analogia. On the radio in Atlanta whose name was Beyonce?
But I couldn't figure out if that was her radio
(38:37):
name or her birth name. Yeah. See, it's it's tough.
It's like, out of the one that I know exists,
she's doing very well. Oh yeah, do you know what
I mean? Like, that's why it's like you should never
make that comparison. We at the show. I want to
kick it to you, the listener. You the listener, you're
(38:58):
the listener. How do you, hey, Comeric, how do you feel?
Don't let her get closer to you than may don't
don't don't let that work. Okay? How do you feel?
What are your feelings? How do you feel? Valentine's Day
is a hard time for a lot of people, including me.
So I understand it could be a nice day or
(39:20):
could be a sad day, you know, but you have
to figure out for you, how do you feel. Is
it that Valentine's Day should be about romantic love or
should be about all of their loves like your friends
and your puppet dog and your mama and your aunties,
your cousins, you know, is it a whole thing? We're
(39:40):
just like, hey, here's a person that I have a
sexual time with, or should be about everybody that you know?
And so yeah, just tell us thank you. Yeah, so
just hit us up. Let us know. Why are you
thinking faces? I don't connection with I'm just I'm saying
I feel like this is I feel like this was
a tactic. Camera you got closer to the camera than me,
(40:02):
and then and then you were using the sweet voice
and stuff, and I think, okay, but also getting closer
even you even did that hey hey hey, pulling them
closer to you like I'm not right here. That's why.
That's why I did right here. Use I can't get
close while you get close. That no, no, no to
(40:26):
for us both to get close. It's just abrasive. Listen,
you didn't get close because you didn't have a heartfelt
message for the people. What are you talking about? A
heartfelt message for the people? All right, Look, if you
love your boot if it's you and your boo all day. Okay,
if you if you roll with the person that you love. Look,
(40:46):
if you love, If you love the person that you love,
you want to spend balentire's day with them, and you
just want to be proud of your love, then go
ahead and let us know in the comments. And I'm
even closer. The Dulce say was so maybe I'm bore right.
How about that I'm closer to the bike, closer to
the camera on myself. No no, no, no, no no,
this is what you wanted. Okay, that's not what I
(41:10):
wanted at out. That was not genuine an art valt.
He was an alien alien, an alien one attack. Okay,
well look you're not an attack. You listen when this
comes out on YouTube, you can see this area fifty
one close up. You gave everybody I can like stuff
(41:33):
is my fault when you told me to do it,
You're like, no, no, no, you you should get close,
be closer. Thank god, I told you to look up
because you was happening. You were close, but you were
looking down. It looked even more while Okay, so that
what you helping me was the Okay, yes, if you
(41:54):
were trying to make a valid point. I wasn't gonna
let you not use the tools. So this is for
the future. But if you want to come see me,
do stand up in person. On March tenth and eleven,
I'll be at the Kansas cy Improv. You can get
your tickets at the Improv. And then after that, I'm
gonna be in Fort Collins March thirty one and April one.
(42:17):
You can go to their website Comedy Fort Collins dot
com or just check out the link that we provide.
So I me will be at the Dr Grin's Comedy
Club and Grand Rapids, Michigan February to the twenty bit.
I don't know why I'm using my announcer voice, but
I think that all help dig into your Brenz is
(42:40):
what my dates are going to be. So yeah, that's
my most and then I'm gonna be at Last Seattle
March three and the fourth. Yeah, So let us know
if you feel like that Valentine's Day should only be
focused on people who are in a relationship who enjoy
a pre six menu um or do you want it
(43:05):
to be for everybody? Oh my god, did I just
all lives matter of Valentine's Day. Maybe y'all have a
great rest of the day and a great weekend. God
damn it, this has been hold up. We've covered conscious
rap versus club bangers, bars versus body wash, diners versus
(43:27):
waffle houses, all sorts of things. What else should we
be talking about? We want to know from you. Let
us know, drop us a comment or hit hold up
on social At the day we show
Asked someone who got engaged on Valentine's Day. It's corny
and ship because when you asked me, I was excited.
At the same time, I was like, nigger, really Valentine's
Uh huh, what a basic ass move is this? Wow?
(00:23):
Welcome everyone to hold up the show. That's a whole
lot about it, very little. I am one of your
co hosts. My name is Josh Johnson, and I am
joined by those love you could could do do je
(00:51):
So you're just not gonna say what you do at
all already? Oh yeah, it's those like so cresparted for
the Daily Show. I do the voice of honey Bee
on The Great North. I produce Lavo Sharpe's One Woman's show,
Don't Reach in the Bag? Um, I get residual checks.
What else do I do? My mom doesn't work, She's
got two phones. It's great. Um, I'm a cat lover
(01:14):
because dogs are booted. Okay, Well, I'm very happy for you.
And this show is where you and I debate topics
that people need to be discussing all the time. We're like, oh,
this government thing, NATO. People don't know what NATO is.
(01:34):
People don't know some people know what NATO is. Like
we can at least the Peter with NATO know what
NATO is. You know how many people all right Nato?
I think at least a handful some people know what
NATO is? Yeah, but like what's Unesco? What's the world?
(02:02):
W the G eight? What do they do? This is
why we have this show so we don't have to
talk about serious things like that. You know, and the
G five is And I can tell you it's not
a plane. It's just regular, you know, everyday things that
we feel passionately about that people actually do know about.
(02:23):
You know. Today's Today's is close to our hearts in
in a in a figurative and a literal sense. Today's
topic is Valentine's Day? Romantic can you be? Or is
it not? How sad can you be? I February? So
(02:44):
doun't say tell the people which what you landed on?
So for Valentine's Day, I feel like that it shouldn't
be only on the romantic code, right, I don't think
it has to be only I just think that it is.
But I don't think that was what it was for originally. Well, no,
that's not true, it was for that originally. I'm saying
(03:06):
that there are so many types of love, so why
do we only want to talk about the love. Well,
you have to put your mouth on somebody, there's other loves.
You don't put your mouth on anybody. Oh yeah, yeah,
I see what you mean. I mean I landed on
the romantic side just because I think that it's the
one time a year outside of an anniversary where you
(03:30):
can really flex on the person that you love. It
it's birthday, well know what I mean? Those are just
like those are for everybody. So anybody that you have
in your life that's close to you, you should be
getting a Christmas present, but you don't have. Yeah, you
could flex on Christmas. I'm just saying, it's like this
is a romantic one. This is like the don't hand
(03:53):
on February. There's Alexus December to remember because it's your
buy your love when alexis for Christmas? Right, because they
want your flex hard. Ain't no car companies coming up
during the Valentine's Day, Like, hey, body's fine wines for
the Valentine's or you know what is it, Hey, don't
(04:15):
steal that for me. Don't steal that for me. Don't
do that. Yeah, there definitely are now now that you
said it, now that you've given it to them on
an audio platter, thank you so much. And just your ears,
I know, like for like my mom, every one Valentine's
Day would give me and my brother presence because it's
(04:38):
about the lou My mom did something similar. Yeah, your
mother is the first person who loves you, right, yeah,
and she's your first Valentine and everything. I get you.
But I'm just saying that now as an adult, you know,
Valentine's Days is an opportunity two just be like, oh,
I can take you to the next level girl and see.
(05:02):
But what Valentine's They does that it leaves out the
single people. It makes them said like, if you don't
think I cry to a Valentine's Day, you're at your
damn mine. I'm with you. I'm with you. I'm not
saying that you use it. This is what I this
is what I've even said this in stand up before.
For every couple that posts like a selfie of them
(05:24):
on Valentine's Day with like the chocolates and the flowers
and all this stuff like that, and oh my gosh,
he proposed whatever you should legally have to also post
one of you fighting like that, like that should also
because that's the reality. It's like, you know, there's a
there's a day where you're nothing but killing it and
there's a day where you want to kill each other.
(05:45):
That's just normal life, right, Because as someone who got
engaged on Valentine's Day, it's corny and ship Compluteing asked me,
I was excited at the same time, I was like, nigger,
really Valentine's Uh huh, what a basic ass move is this? Wow? Okay,
(06:13):
I mean, I said, yes, it was still a corny
but I mean but also after a month I broke
off the engagement and a month after then I broke
up with him completely. What I'm saying is that she
was corny. She was corny. I think it makes more
people sad than it does happy, is what I personally believe.
Like you think so yes, because like every year on
Valentine's Day, I give out Valentine's to my friends. I
(06:35):
go and find like the little kid Valentine's used to
get in like elementary school, or I'll make something. I
go to Michael's and get like the little like uh
the little craft kits and make like a little like
Valentine or something, or I go to the dollar tree,
like you know, I did it for you at work
one time I came up look gift back and see
do I make one for everybody? No? Yea, So now
(06:57):
I have to like do some fun ones because I
made some valent lines in lockdown, not like no, when
we're still working at home, and I made some shout
out to Cricket for sending me a cricket joy um.
And I was making them and I was making like
shaker ones, and they weren't coming out the way I
wanted them to. And I was afraid to send them
to people because because they take them by of the envelope.
(07:17):
And then then I glitter all over their house and sidebar,
have you seen the video of the girl whose boyfriend
cheated on her and she threw glitter all over his
fucking house? No, like she And it wasn't like the
little things of glitter you get like the like when
you were a kid. This is like restaurant seasoning size
(07:40):
containers of glitter. And she went through every room in
his house and the carpet too, and she had various
kid bottles with her various colors, and so I'm talking
about she went in the bed and went through the sheets,
letter in the tubs, so unnecessary, all the things. Now,
(08:03):
I don't think. So it's just like I get it,
I get it, then leave, then leave and not not
really she she left. She left later what I said,
And I saw a quote that said, uh, she broke
nothing but destroyed everything. Yeah, I mean, if you like,
(08:24):
here's the thing glitter in his deviled eggs. Yes, that's hilarious,
Like glitter in the kitchen means glitter and all the food.
I'm with you. I mean, this is a man. It
was a he's a white man's house, and she wouldn't
like she threw glitter in the refrigerator. But it was nothing.
But it hit nothing. Yeah, just hit the catchup bottle.
It just hit egg catchup bottle and two cans of
Coca Cola and a six pack of here because it
(08:46):
was a white man's house. I'm not to say that
they don't. But he's also an early twenty so he
survives off of cereal. Um. Busting out windows, yeah, going
full carry underwood yeah, yeah is a felony. Uh if
you cheat on somebody, should you sunk up their ship?
I don't know, right, someone cheats on you, I guide
(09:08):
you on me to funk up a ship. No, because
I know he's still a worthless human being. Time got
back at him for me. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
But like the moment, in the moment, yeah, I wanted to.
The thing is the way the reason that happened sucked
me up so bad? Is that the story you're getting
retold to me because like, oh, I felt guilty. I
(09:30):
was lying the last time I told you what happened. Actually,
this is what happened. And I'm like, every time I
started moving past it was like it was crazy. Every
time I was like, I was like, okay, I forgave
him and I started moving past it. He Actually that's
not the way it went down. This is how it
went down. I'm just like, bro, shut up. Yeah yeah,
(09:51):
I mean, if anything, that's the glitter of that's like
the glitter of like memory, you know, right, But it's like,
why are you antagonizing me? I got us completely off
task like I usually do, because we were talking about
like cheating and stuff like that, because I got proposed
(10:12):
to Valentine's Day? Corny ass bullshit. Yeah, do you think
that with Valentine's Day? How about this? They're there are
gestures that I think I agree or like very corny.
I think that, um Like, I'm not saying everyone should
make their Valentine's Day a secret, but I do think
a lot of it is uh is best left to
(10:35):
like the couple that's in it, because what you end
up doing is in sharing your love, you end up
showing people how like unsettling y'all are? Do you know
what I'm saying. It's like the thing in high school
where the girl I was walking on all the balloons
with the guys walking on all the stuff. Or it's
(10:55):
like a couple who like they they do way too
much on Valentine's Day. Yeah, so I think it's a
romantic holiday and I think that that to me, it
makes sense. Like even when I've been single, I've been like, Okay,
well good for them, you know what I mean. But
I think that it also does give the opportunity for
(11:15):
people to really show off that they might be out
of their minds. I mean, I think every day is
an opportunity that you were out of your mind, and
if you're not using every day an opportunity to show
people m that you're out of your mind. Okay, are
(11:35):
you living your best life? I are you reaching your
full potential as a human being? Are you doing the work?
Are you being the best you for you? Are you
asking real questions? Right now? I can't tell anymore. I
(11:59):
mean the first one was a little wild, and then
they just got progressively more insane. I just saying that
in my life I've spent I'm thirty nine years old,
so there have been like thirty eight thirty nine Valentine's
(12:21):
Days in my life. One through fifteen, I guess can't
count because I was a child. One through doesn't count,
so one through doesn't count. So I'm talking sixteen to
thirty nine, right, twenty three years right out them, twenty
three years, I've probably had maybe five good Valentine's Days
(12:47):
if I had one at all, five good ones, okay, five,
just five, and gently just five. Had the opportunity to
experience of Valentine's Day with a significant other, so I
don't have to experience the frame of reference. Um, and
I'm trying to sound like a hater, but I also
(13:08):
wanted to be like, you know, in the spirit of transparency,
there's nothing, there's something there's an intersection. There's a really
beautiful intersection where, um, I don't know, let me, let
(13:28):
me figure out the best way to describe this. Where
people take sort of office see like rhetoric or or
like office language, and they incorporate either that or incorporate
that into blackness. That makes for beautiful turns of phrase,
(13:48):
like like really, like do you do you see what
I mean? Because in the spirit of feels very like
a CEO was about to tell you that we're out
of money, right, but when you said transparency, there was
something that was like that was like, yeah, I think
that this is what corporate America has been missing. It's
just a black woman at the top of Like, in
(14:10):
the spirit of transparency, I want to let all of
you know that you no longer have jobs, you know,
because right now the emails read very cold. They don't
read with that sort of uplifting Sunday morning gospel, no
warmth type of vibe, no warmth right, yeah, and that's
why I laughed so hard at in the spirit of
(14:31):
parents see for me, in the spirit of I feel
like it's a black thing, and then transparency is the
work thing. Okay, yeah, but you see that's what I mean.
I'm like, I don't know which thing is, but they're
they're they're molding together. The melding up things, Yes, is
in the spiritful transparency. Also, it's also the name of
the group chat of Um all of us on me
and my friends with the Bahamas, not with you. I
(14:53):
always said one text I was I was in the thing.
I didn't go to the Bamas. And I remember I
I said what text of Everybody was like, it's a bit, Josh.
I wanted to be like, yeah, I know. I was
trying to help. I was like, Josh did good, Josh
did good. Everybody was like, no, you are here. It's
(15:14):
a bit. I'm like all right, And I was like,
we don't have to do like that. I was sitting
by the pool and y'all had to my friend like that,
sitting there drinking. JAD like, hey, you have to do
my friend. I think I'm not trying to sound like
(15:35):
a hater, but I just spent so many Valentine's Days just,
you know, not enjoying it. There was other people enjoyed it,
and I think a lot of people feel that there
is a pressure. I also know if you first there's
also a lot of times where I've I've met someone
(15:55):
like right before Valentine's Day, that's my favorite, like two
three weeks way to close. Like when I met the
mechanic it was like the end of January, and he
did give me a card. In the front of it said, um,
I like you, and then we opened the insid and
(16:16):
it's all your fault, which is very much him. Um
may no longer have it. I ripped it up and
throw it away. But but it is a cute card.
It's in the moment in on Valentine's Day twenty two
thousand seven. The sentiment was enjoyed by the following year
(16:40):
and the stubbs the point of years he had a
great way of not being very dependable around that holiday.
But that is neither hither nor thither. Um. I will
say that there does seem to be a convenient Uh,
there's a kind venient type of argument or trip, like
(17:08):
something tends to happen. Sometimes broke dudes will start an
argument with you before Valentine's Day so they can use
the excuse to not get you anything, and then, you know,
very conveniently reconcile after the holiday, leaving them to therefore
think that they are not responsible for giving you anything
(17:32):
for Valentine's Day. I think it just like us a
lot of pressure. Like there were a couple of comics
for this one. I was like, he said, if it
wasn't for me giving him something, it was five years
in a world that I gave him something a Valentine's
Day and it was the only thing you ever got,
he said. He said he always looked forward because he said,
he said, I knew if I didn't get anything, I
knew I would get a card from you, m hm,
(17:53):
which I always thought was nice because it's like it
was very sweet. Yeah, because it's like some people don't
get things and it's like it's we want to act
like that's like, oh, it doesn't matter, but it's like
it does make you sad. Yes, it definitely can make
you sad in in that comparison, but I guess I
also say that there is something to like having having
(18:18):
a thing that like My initial point is I think
that Valentine's Day can and deserves to be romantic because
it's a it's an extra thing outside of uh, your
anniversary or birthday or just cause that can be you know,
a nice night out or like an opportunity to do
(18:42):
something nice for each other. The the overall um projection
out to the world is where I think both to me,
makes people sad, shows people off that they're crazy, and
creates a weird uh level of comparison, even between couples.
So the way that I'll admit that Valentine's Day can
(19:03):
be toxic is, um, there was this time my buddy
was out to a dinner with his girlfriend. Right, this
is like and it was one of those um, what
do you call it? It was. It was one of
those prefixed menus for Valentine's Day. So it's nothing but
(19:25):
couples in the restaurant, right, another couple couples right, old
old hall a bit everything, right, but in the middle
of dinner service, which is pretty much nine pm, So
everybody that came in an eight that that might be
about to leave, everybody that's getting there at nine, and
people walking in for their nine thirty, this dude gets
on one knee and proposes to his girlfriend and just
(19:50):
ruined Valentine's Day for everybody else left in the restaurant,
because think about it, it's like you got her a
little bracelet or whatever. This dude got her commitment, and
you just gotta sit there for the next hour to
have be like, so do you like your fish? He
ruined everybody else's romantic evening. That's how my friend described it.
(20:15):
He was like it sucked all the air out the
room because every dude in the room was like, God, dang, like,
why you gotta do that? You can't do that outside.
You gotta do it in the middle of different Yeah,
like yes, absolutely, just staring like all right, abrace, it's nice,
it's not a rain. But also there's probably some women
(20:38):
in there would be like, God, I hope he doesn't
do that to me. Now I'm with you. I mean
he can't. Now imagine if you're the third person to
propose in the same restaurant and one night, how embarrassing
that ship would be. That would actually be wild. Is
like I also have something to say, might as well
keep clapping? Do it? Sucking spartacus hmm. I saw this
(21:03):
name and this guy like was like in the middle
of the mall right, and he bit down on one knee.
So you see him bent down on one knee, but
he's holding the ring in one hand, but his he's
hold the ring in his head is down and then
you see the girl walking away, right, So she obviously
(21:26):
said no m and then the caption read she could
have just said yes and changed her mind later. She
didn't have to embarrass someone's son in public like that.
And then the next comment was like the next comment,
but I think it was like some woman going, first
of all, fuck you. This is more of a the
(21:49):
toxic mindset that we have towards women, because it's just like, so,
you wanted this girl to say yes to him, to
trick him. So a group of people didn't. So the
group a straight dingers, Yeah, he's either gonna be embarrassed
now or embarrassed later. Right, didn't hear her say no?
It was like someone else said, It's like he probably
embarrassed her because now she has to tell him no
(22:12):
in public. Yeah. Like this is the thing where it
just like we're just it's like that was someone's first
reaction to singing this because oh my god, she embarrassed him.
I'll even pitch you this, right. I think we should
keep Valentine's Day romantic. That's my side of the argument.
But I do think we should take some of the
(22:32):
mystery out of proposals because too many people, too many
people are over here being proposed too wrong or doing
proposals wrong. It's like depending on who you're with, because
a proposal is different than a relationship. There are some
people that are very quiet and very personal that would
actually love a huge gesture, and then there's people there
in the opposite, there are people who were like, maybe
(22:53):
they're in the public eye or whatever, so they want
their their moment like that to be very personal and intimate. Right,
I think guest thing is done because people people don't
play with guessing anymore. So it's like I think that
there needs to be a conversation. It may not even
happen that year. I don't even think it should happen
to me. Obviously it should not happen in the same
(23:13):
week as you're going to do it. But even if
it happens in the same year, I think there needs
to be a conversation way ahead of time of like
what do you think about you know, proposals, or what
do you think about this type of proposal or whatever,
because then you at least get a sense because now
if somebody's embarrassed, that's on them because they told you
that's the type of thing that they liked. Yeah, I
(23:35):
did see something online where someone was like eat her
and her significant other talked about like, this is the
kind of ring I want ring. I want to take
the mestry out of it. You want to be happy,
tell us what you want about the number of people
that have been proposed to that are walking around with
(23:55):
a ring they didn't want ugly ring, but you don't.
You're supposed to ask because someone's mom or someone's friend
and all the other ship. But you got a ring
you didn't want. You got a big gesture and you
didn't want one, or you got a little gesture and
you want a big one. You know. It's uh, I'm
fully with you. There should be no photographer that hot. Yeah,
(24:17):
I think. But also it's like because when I got proposed,
so I didn't know it was coming mm hmm. But
I start proposed in a bedroom. So but I also
feel like this this is my thing. You got proposed
that I didn't have a shirt. I did mine offense,
(24:43):
neither did he. That would be wild if he came
into the suit that you don't have a shirt. He
was like, I'm wearing a bra right now? What are
you doing it's crazy? Um No. I think that a
lot of the guests work can be taken out by
genuinely just having all that communication ahead time. I know
(25:06):
it takes some of the mystery out of it, which
is fun for people. But I also think that a
you you either if you want to live in mystery,
you're gonna have to accept the fact that sometimes you're
gonna get something that's not gonna be the way you
want to get it right. Like yeah, when when people
(25:27):
want their birthday to be spontaneous but they give no direction,
it's like, I I hope you like whatever I got,
because the best you know. I think there has to
be more conversations because like a man I was seeing
recently asked me to marry him, like within the past year,
(25:47):
but there was no ring mm hmm, and we were
just casually eating. I do feel like depending on the
type of person or pending on their age, it stops
being less of a proposal and more of just floating ideas.
(26:08):
Because that's what it sounds like happened in your Yeah,
that's kind of he was like, what if we got married,
we should get married. I was like, that's not why
I am here. Well, to be fair though, since that
that still leaves the room to do a proper proposal.
That was him floating the idea. So now if you're like, oh,
(26:31):
I think we could get married, like now, he knows
to do it later. But then it was like I
was like ah, and he was like I want to
marry you, and I was like, okay, we should get married.
All right, retract my previous statement. Yeah, he didn't stop
saying words I thought. Initially I thought he stopped at
(26:56):
that part, and I was like, oh, well then now
you just gotta wait for the countdown until he does.
But it also I was like, I'd only known him
for a month. Yeah, but you can't. Can't blame people
for the effect you have on them. You don't know
the other dude, I knew him for three months. Yeah. Hey,
(27:17):
sometimes people just dive in. Don't question it. I get it.
But it's like, bro, I'm with you. It seems quick
if I say to you more than once, Hey, I'm
just having fun. M h, we're just having fun. I
don't think we're having I don't think he heard what
(27:37):
I was saying. Yeah, but that's more I will say
a lot of people do that though. That's a that's
a huge thing that people have. No matter we always
talk about communication and stuff, some people will actually communicate.
They'll look you in your eye and tell you what
they want and what they need and the other person
just does not receive it. And so so then you
you get into a situation of like, what do you
(27:59):
mean not office is going somewhere. It's like I said
a long time ago, that we're just chilling and then
they and then they have a reaction to it, and
you know what I mean. So, yeah, you can only
you can only control what you do. You know, truly,
you can lead a horse to water, but you can't
make them that proposed to you you don't want to.
(28:25):
I think that we should open up Valentine just to
be like about all kinds of news because thing is Valentine.
There is a celebration of romantic love, right, Okay, Yeah,
when do we celebrate the other kinds of love? Because
I think most people interact with wrong romance, non romantic
(28:46):
love more maybe then you do the other loves. Yeah,
I think you're right because you're you're you, You're a
mom daughter for your whole life. Whereas you're in and
our relationships. I agree with that completely. I just think
that there are days for those other relationships, like Mother's Day,
(29:08):
Father's Day, like Christmas, like you know, even even depending
on your belief system, Easter, you know, like people people
do all there's all about love. It's all about love.
But I'm just saying some people give their friends gifts
on Easter. Some people don't. Who gets gifts on Easter.
I'm not even saying I do. I've just heard of it.
(29:29):
Grown adults are given grown adults gifts on Easter, I guess, so,
I mean it's it's something. It's something I've seen very
very rich people do, so not this is not a
regular thing. I'm just saying it happens. Should I start
giving out time Easter baskets? Just give out peeps to
your enemies from my enemies. There was a comic the
(29:54):
other day that called me his enemy. He's called me
his arch like. He was like, he's like he's Nemesis,
like the Nemesis. And I was like, I don't think
I don't care about you enough to be your nemesis.
I don't even arch my eyebrows when I see you
affect me in no way. I mean, honestly, I think
(30:14):
he just wants to suck me. But it's like, um,
He's like, yeah, you have my nemesis, and I was like, Nigga,
I don't know your last name. You know it. There
are some people, there are some people in this world
that stay in a sort of adversarial lane to their
(30:38):
intended loves. Yeah, I would never Yeah, they more, you
know it. It starts on the playground. It's like it's like, oh,
I think you have cooties. Now they don't finish the sentence.
They're like, I want those cooties, you know. But I
think even even into you know, adulthood, there are some people,
(31:00):
but I hate and grown men do this because it's
a form of nagging, this form of aggression, and what
they don't like is to be met with their aggression
with aggression. It's their aggressive You're supposed to go, nigga,
you are not cute enough. If you're gonna come at
somebody with the nagging thing, you have to know what
(31:23):
lane you are in. You have to know what your
reflection with your faces. You need to know how the
account for your face was set up before you start
coming up to people and doing this nagging ship because
what they don't expect is for you to come back
just it's oh, this is what we're doing, sir. I
(31:44):
was born for this, For this, I'm gonna hurt your
fucking feelings. This nigga said, I look the deadness face
and said how I don't know your last name? When
our friends went damn. I do feel like if the
abe you're in and of itself is negative, it actually
doesn't matter what their face looks like. Oh that's not true.
(32:09):
That's not true. That's not true. What listen if they
because the thing is, if they truly don't know what
they're doing and they're just being truly fucking annoying and negative,
then you're right because it'll make them look less attractive.
If you would have just walked up to me and
said hello, if you put it up this dude that
(32:36):
walked up to you and said hello, paramore, I'd be like, Oho, this.
They gotta give vocabiniers in your back pocket. Come on, buddy,
this they can seemed bridged. Okay, This man enjoys masterpiece
the alright, this man reads a book or three shook
(33:00):
speare that Shakespeare come through. This man is trying to
make the Beast with two backs? You hear me, I
wanna learn about it. I cannot wait, so people google
the Beast with two backs? Um shame speare reference reader.
But but yeah, so that's why I was like, I
think there needs to be more situations we can celebrate
(33:21):
our hands a loop mm hmm, because a lot of
people haven't had great Valentine's Days. And also it's okay,
you got your Mother's Day, you got your Father's Day.
There's other parts of a family. M hmmm, where's your
cousin day? What's your grandparents Day? I guess grandparents get
honored as parents technically get parents. Grandparents tend to also
(33:45):
fall into the mothers and fathers because grandparents get to
double dip because there is Grandparents Day. But we don't
even have shipped for that. Yeah, like not an easy thing,
but we do have a day where if you remember,
you get them something. I didn't know. I don't wonder
where they put Mother's Day and Father's Day when it is.
(34:08):
I wanted to give it enough time apart, Well, why
isn't it made? I guess June didn't have anything. Yeah,
you don't want bankrupt people? Oh yeah, I guess, but like,
how come Father's Day is in September? I don't know.
I mean Father's Day already doesn't really get much to it.
(34:29):
We don't get done. It really is like sad to
watch it really does bumming. I'm not even a dad
and that that bumby out for real, Like it's just
And the funny thing about it is that, like when
you um when you see people complain about it online,
(34:51):
there's always somewhere this like, uh, well moms do all
this other It's like, yeah, that's why everyone respects their
day like this. This is literally just a conversation about
how dad's just get old ties hub caps, like just
whatever was laying around is what you give your dad
(35:11):
is usually something fix. Definitely take your mother out to eat. Yeah,
one Mother's Day do you have? How many dads get
sweaters that they already have the same pattern of Also,
Father's Day is in June? Where the fund did you
get this sweater? Where did you get this sweater? Which
means it's an old sweater. We all know it's an
old sweater because you couldn't give it to him at Christmas?
(35:34):
You you bought two sweaters at Christmas. You gave him
one and then you saved up till Father's Day. Because
that's how little you care about Father's Day. This is
the question. A lot of people don't even call. A
lot of people are like, a right, honestly, that's his fault.
If no one calls, he barely he wasn't a good father. No, no, no,
(35:59):
because if you don't be a better father. No, no, no,
because because if you forget to call your mom a
Mother's Day, that's always all you. Right, Like, if you
forgot to call your mom on Mother's Day, people will
be like, clearly she's not a good mother. It'd be like,
what's with you? Yeah, yeah, So if you don't call
(36:21):
your mother and Mother's Day, you're an asshole. If you
don't got your father and Father's Day, he wasn't a
good dad. It's like, but what if this, if this
is a same family, how is this possible. I'm not
saying it's impossible, but like, come on now, you can't
tell me you you you grew up. This is the
only time we blame anything on men. Is fathering, Like
(36:43):
you didn't do it. It will be wild too, especially
if you did a good job. You'll be there at
everything and then they don't call and this like why,
I guess you didn't grind hard enough. It's like she's
I went to all the games. I don't think what
else is I supposed to do? You don't forget your
dad and if he comes to all the games? No,
some people genuinely I I don't think, like, look, whatever
(37:07):
is not my battle. I'm not saying poor bad, poor bad.
I'm literally just saying the level to which people don't
appreciate when they have a good dad. You know what
I mean, Because let's let's be let's be for real.
If there's a lot of trash dads out there, that
means the good ones should actually have more shine. You know,
I think we celebrate the good ones. What serena dad?
(37:31):
That's that's it. That's that's really Tiger Dad. Like I
don't know, Joe checks see, I'm trying to list only
good dads. Right now, you're still like a um yeah.
(37:54):
By Helen high Water, that clearly his tactics worked truly,
which is the logic that white people use where it's like,
how can you say black people are are having a
hard time? Look at this one black person who yeah
to step on to get where they are. Black people
(38:16):
need to be doing great. Look at Beyonce. She's just
had a whole concert and Dubai and I'm like, bro,
most people don't even know what the Dubai is. Also,
I don't even know any other Beyonce's So that's the
worst analogia. On the radio in Atlanta whose name was Beyonce?
But I couldn't figure out if that was her radio
(38:37):
name or her birth name. Yeah. See, it's it's tough.
It's like, out of the one that I know exists,
she's doing very well. Oh yeah, do you know what
I mean? Like, that's why it's like you should never
make that comparison. We at the show. I want to
kick it to you, the listener. You the listener, you're
(38:58):
the listener. How do you, hey, Comeric, how do you feel?
Don't let her get closer to you than may don't
don't don't let that work. Okay? How do you feel?
What are your feelings? How do you feel? Valentine's Day
is a hard time for a lot of people, including me.
So I understand it could be a nice day or
(39:20):
could be a sad day, you know, but you have
to figure out for you, how do you feel. Is
it that Valentine's Day should be about romantic love or
should be about all of their loves like your friends
and your puppet dog and your mama and your aunties,
your cousins, you know, is it a whole thing? We're
(39:40):
just like, hey, here's a person that I have a
sexual time with, or should be about everybody that you know?
And so yeah, just tell us thank you. Yeah, so
just hit us up. Let us know. Why are you
thinking faces? I don't connection with I'm just I'm saying
I feel like this is I feel like this was
a tactic. Camera you got closer to the camera than me,
(40:02):
and then and then you were using the sweet voice
and stuff, and I think, okay, but also getting closer
even you even did that hey hey hey, pulling them
closer to you like I'm not right here. That's why.
That's why I did right here. Use I can't get
close while you get close. That no, no, no to
(40:26):
for us both to get close. It's just abrasive. Listen,
you didn't get close because you didn't have a heartfelt
message for the people. What are you talking about? A
heartfelt message for the people? All right, Look, if you
love your boot if it's you and your boo all day. Okay,
if you if you roll with the person that you love. Look,
(40:46):
if you love, If you love the person that you love,
you want to spend balentire's day with them, and you
just want to be proud of your love, then go
ahead and let us know in the comments. And I'm
even closer. The Dulce say was so maybe I'm bore right.
How about that I'm closer to the bike, closer to
the camera on myself. No no, no, no, no no,
this is what you wanted. Okay, that's not what I
(41:10):
wanted at out. That was not genuine an art valt.
He was an alien alien, an alien one attack. Okay,
well look you're not an attack. You listen when this
comes out on YouTube, you can see this area fifty
one close up. You gave everybody I can like stuff
(41:33):
is my fault when you told me to do it,
You're like, no, no, no, you you should get close,
be closer. Thank god, I told you to look up
because you was happening. You were close, but you were
looking down. It looked even more while Okay, so that
what you helping me was the Okay, yes, if you
(41:54):
were trying to make a valid point. I wasn't gonna
let you not use the tools. So this is for
the future. But if you want to come see me,
do stand up in person. On March tenth and eleven,
I'll be at the Kansas cy Improv. You can get
your tickets at the Improv. And then after that, I'm
gonna be in Fort Collins March thirty one and April one.
(42:17):
You can go to their website Comedy Fort Collins dot
com or just check out the link that we provide.
So I me will be at the Dr Grin's Comedy
Club and Grand Rapids, Michigan February to the twenty bit.
I don't know why I'm using my announcer voice, but
I think that all help dig into your Brenz is
(42:40):
what my dates are going to be. So yeah, that's
my most and then I'm gonna be at Last Seattle
March three and the fourth. Yeah, So let us know
if you feel like that Valentine's Day should only be
focused on people who are in a relationship who enjoy
a pre six menu um or do you want it
(43:05):
to be for everybody? Oh my god, did I just
all lives matter of Valentine's Day. Maybe y'all have a
great rest of the day and a great weekend. God
damn it, this has been hold up. We've covered conscious
rap versus club bangers, bars versus body wash, diners versus
(43:27):
waffle houses, all sorts of things. What else should we
be talking about? We want to know from you. Let
us know, drop us a comment or hit hold up
on social At the day we show
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