January 6, 2022 • 41 mins
You won't be Dancing in the Dark because Gleb Savchenko is here to answer all your dating questions!
Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This
is how men thick and I heard radio podcast. Hey guys,
I'm lips up Chenko. You know me as a professional
danswering boreographer danswer with the stars and I am stuper
happy to co post and be a guest host. Um
on how men think? I'm gonna be answering all your
(00:24):
questions and the the main like, the fascinating question is
that how men think? So let's get started. Producers put
me in the hot steed and I have to answer
all of these eleven questions that are in front of me,
and let's start a question number one? What are you
known for? Tell us about yourself what I'm known for.
(00:48):
I mean, I'm hot Russian professional board dancer and dancer
with the stars. That's what I'm known for. But I'm
also a girl that I have two beautiful daughters living
just turned eleven yesterday actually, and I have a lot
who's four years old. Um, and you know my life
is around them and dance and that's what I've pretty
(01:10):
much like known for. And um yeah, who are you
in your personal life? Who am I in my personal life? Oh?
What does it mean? Mean? Like I don't even know
who are you in the person? Like I think, um,
you know I am, you know, I'm a dad. Number one.
(01:32):
I think I'm I've been. I'm dreaven always to be
a better person every day. I come from nothing. Uh
and I'm in Hollywood living literally in American dream Like
if you would like it would have more time, like
I would tell you, like my whole life story, which
is I think it's pretty crazy, but um yeah, I
(01:54):
just I'm just just a regular normal guy with two
kids saying go and you know, trying to trying to
teach celebrities to chat to walk. What three TV shows
are you binge watching right now? That's a good one, Um,
the three D TV shows? So I would say number one.
(02:15):
I'm still like it's an older show, but I think
like if someone like I haven't watched it as the
money has, I'm obsessed with the show. I think it's
an incredible show. The recent one that I just watched
is with Game also Super Sick, Like I love that show.
And the one that I just started watching is The Made.
(02:37):
I think it's like a pretty like a intense show
that kind of like actually, you know, see what's going
on with like people with other people like where they're
going through. You know what I mean is it's like
it's a really beautiful shot at and produced. I think
it's a really good show. What is your favorite food?
What's my favorite food? What's my favorite food? I think pizza.
(03:07):
I love pizza like I love any kind of pizza.
I think I can eat pizza every day. Um yeah,
that's like my favorite food. I know it's really bad.
It's like super healthy. And I supposed to represent like
a health and wellness and I was like pizza, you know,
so yeah, I love pizza. Tell us about your career. Okay,
(03:31):
my career. Um, look, my career is pretty crazy. I
you know, I grew up a mom originally from Moscow, Russia.
Grew up with mom and dad, and they kind of
put me in the dance gas and I started, you know, dancing,
and by the age of thirteen fourteen, I knew it
(03:54):
was gonna be my career. Like in my culture is
like if you do something for a specially for parents,
and they probably put me in dance colleges because they
wanted to keep me off the streets and like you know,
for kids to do something, but then they push you.
They push you so hard that it becomes your you know,
like it becomes you know, something that you do, and
then you have to do it great and you have
(04:17):
to put all your energy into it. And I danced
with all my life and then then moved to different
country a lot via I dance there with a girl
represent the country for a couple of years. Uh. Came
back to Russian kind of at the age of seventeen eighteen,
I realized I was like, I don't really want to
do dance anymore, Like there's like, you know, I only
(04:39):
spend money because there's no like price, uh money for
the competitions, and that was like a Russian champion at
that time, Like you always have to travel on your
with your own expand you have to take lessons, you
have to buy coustomes, buy shoes, so it becomes like
an expensive hobby. So it doesn't give you unless you teach.
But and with teaching, like in Russia, like you can
(05:00):
to really make anything. So I was like, I gotta
do something. So I became a fitness dance fitness instructor
in one of the fitness centers in Moscow, and one
um kind of mine and she came up to me
after the class. She was like, have you ever tried modeling?
And I was like, no, never tried modeling. She was like,
I'm gonna take you to model agency. So she brought
(05:20):
me to model agency. I uh, I started doing modeling
and became like super successful. Like I was like on
every cover of the magazine in Russian doing music videos
and with this, and like I was like, oh my god,
like I'm gonna be the next breath pit. But for
me to become an ex breath pit, I have to
(05:41):
move to America, you know what I mean. So I
was like great, So I moved to America and I
lived in New York for about three years. I did uh,
I did modeling, and I kind of keep myself going.
I was doing UM still talking they studio UM, and
(06:02):
that's actually the time when dance start. As you just
started to remember in on the time score that they
build this huge glass box where me and my partner
were like promoting this we'll start of this new brand
new TV show where UM coming up. What's your biggest
fear in life? Heights? I'm afraid of heights. I'm like
(06:24):
super scared of heights. What makes you the most happy.
I think just the time with family and kids, and
like what makes me most happy is the positive people,
the energy, you know, like every person has its own energy,
and you know, I just love being around good people
(06:45):
with good energy and interrupt and just have this good
vibe that look like makes me super happy. What's your
biggest pet? Peeve um? I'm like I have like a
major O C D. Like I hate when someone washes
the dishes and they don't like wipe the sink around,
(07:06):
like if they if I could see like splashes of
water around the sink, that frets me out, like I
can't do it, and here like I can't like it.
That's like Scott now like like if I stay here
on the floor, was like, what is your ideal Saturday morning?
Oh my god, what's my ideal Saturday morning? Listen? Simple
(07:32):
sipping a champagne on the boat and central pain. I've
never done this, but that will be ideal on Saturday morning.
Are you more of the athlete or the armchair quarterback?
I'm more than I'm more an athlete. I'm super active. Yeah.
And lastly, what keeps you motivated? What keeps you motivated?
(07:54):
Never never being satisfied with with it's always like it's
weird because and that's like something that I think it's
either um like uh like a cultural thing or the
way we've been like I've been brought up. It's like
(08:16):
it's not being negative, but it's not being satisfied hundred
percent because so you think like, oh you can like
I always can do better, right, so like you can
do better than like you could have like even like
sometimes like let's simple example, right, like we we do
with dance performing dance right, and dance goes great, We've
got great scores on the show or something, but then
I look at the video like and I'm never ever
(08:39):
satisfied like, oh, that was awesome, you know, Like I
told myself to do that because I'm working with someone
who's never danced before. So I have to be positive
and be like, oh that was great, you know, like
actually when I look at it, even for myself, I'm
like this one could have been like this one could
have been better. So that keeps you motivated just to
be better in junior, you know what I mean, Like
(09:01):
with everything I do. Alright, guys, so we're gonna take
a quick break and when we come back. I'm gonna
answer all your questions. Hey guys, and Ashley from the
Almost Famous podcast, It's that time of year where drama
fills the air. The Bachelor is back with an all
new season premiering January three. There's a new host, Jesse Palmer,
(09:24):
and a brand new Bachelor, Clayton. Clayton is a Midwest
boy that has that great smile, nice teeth, and he's
really tall as let's call it what it is, he's
a beefcake. Okay, Well, Clayton seems to be a good
guy though, and he can't wait to find love, get married,
and have kids. And he believes more than anything that
(09:47):
his future wife is on this show. It sounds like
a fairy tale but also a bit of an emotional
world coaster, because Clayton tells three different women he's falling
in love with him. Technically, he told one, I couldn't
be more sure that I'm falling in love with you,
and another one, I'm falling in love with you, and
the third one, I am in love with you. You
(10:10):
don't miss a thing. It's your years of over analyzing
everything that guys say. But his heart is in the
right place. But other parts of him as we find
out what he admits to two different women that he
was intimate with both of them. Yeah, I don't think
it's gonna go over well, we'll be breaking down at
all on the almost famous podcast Ben is Married Now
(10:32):
Well Ashley's a mom will change our opinions of what
we think is acceptable single behavior. Good question find out
on the almost Famous podcast on our Heart Radio and
wherever you listen to podcasts. Al Right, guys, let's get
(10:54):
to our first caller and uh yeah, here we go. Hi.
My question would be, Um, do men ever learn to
communicate better on their own? To communicate that? I think, yeah,
hundred percent. I think it's all about self improvement and
if he I think, for it depends on the person again,
(11:17):
but for me personally, I think over the years, like
I've learned a lot of things, you know, and it's
not you know, you want to improve yourself and just
be better for the person that you're with, you know
what I mean. I think it's like super important, um,
not just to just to communicate, you know, and listen,
(11:39):
like always try to like listen that you know, whoever
is in front of you trying to tell you something.
You know, um, and let the person speak and like
try to like understand, not like stand like be stubborn
like no, no, like you know, but like try to
understand what this person is trying to tell you, because
(12:01):
it's you know, it's important to hear. It's important to hear,
and it's important to listen. That's how you can, you know,
improve yourself otherwise to just being like super closed off.
And you know what do you think, Emma, you agree
with me? Yeah? But does that come in part with
(12:24):
growing with your partner? Do you think like a man
could understand how to communicate with a girl better without
having their partner instruct them or get criticism from them. Well,
there's the situations, right, there's situations like give me an example, right,
(12:44):
let's stay with dating, right, and you want to go
somewhere for Christmas and I don't want to go somewhere
for Christmas? Right, So what do we do talk about exactly?
We talk about it, and we decide and let listen,
(13:05):
you tell them your opinion why you want to go there.
Like they'll be like, listen, maybe we'll go to you know,
to a lake or something, or go to Mexico or
something like that. So it's it's all about the conversation.
I think people need to have a conversation and be
able to hear each other, do you know what I mean?
(13:26):
So like putting yourself on that person's place and be like, well,
I understand where they come up, unless there's like a
ridiculous like you know, so, I mean that makes sense.
I guess it also depends on the stage of where
you are in a relationship. If you guys are together
or just beginning to talk, well, I think it doesn't matter.
(13:48):
I think if you if you're married for fifteen years
or you just start dating. Do you know what I mean?
It's it's always gonna be something like, but it's just
a different like how you're saying. It's a different stage
of the conversation, do you know what I mean? But
there's always that you have to always me. If you
don't like something, tell me and I'll be like no, no, no,
like or I'll be like okay, cool, yeah, like okay,
(14:11):
I'll whatever. But thanks for calling. I appreciate your good question.
Thank you appreci All right, here we go the next color. Hannah. Hi, Um,
my question is I'm wondering if it is considered a
red flag if you talk about an ex boyfriend or
girlfriend on a first date. I mean, it depends how
(14:40):
you talk about it, do you know what I mean? Like,
so I went on a date, uh, and I actually
had a conversation with the girl who I'm actually seeing
now on the first day. We talked about my action.
I've been married for fifteen years, but I'm we're super
cool now have to divorce. But I think it's not
(15:04):
It depends on if you're positive and you're genuinely nice
person and you're like, it's not like unless you're like
shooting on someone, then that would be like, oh, that's
so weird. Like if he talks about her like that,
like what he's going to talk about me or something
like that, that's you know. I think it depends on
the person really, But what do you think I think?
(15:25):
I mean, I think I've been on dates in the
past where they ask if I've been in relationships before,
and I've always been hesitant to answer yes or no
because I don't want them to think I'm talking about
my ex boyfriend too much. I tell you this straight on.
You gotta be you gotta be straightforward, You've gotta be honest.
And if he's okay to that, he's cool because then
(15:45):
you can take it to the next level or whatever.
But if you're like trying to hide something or not
to say something or choose the words how you say,
that's already not like a real thing because you're trying
to like cater like to someone who you're know I
really are you know what I mean? You always have
to be yourself and just be like, Yo, I've been
(16:05):
on twenty five thousand dates did not work. Hopefully you're
the one because I like or something. Just be super
cool yeah, and be like I think personally, you know
what I mean, if we're going the date and they'll
be like okay, Hannah, how many relationships serious relationships have
you had in the past. I'm asking like four four
(16:31):
How that was the last relationship? How long was your
last relationship? Six months? Six months? Why would you guys
break up? Just what some red flags? I think on
his part and maybe my part, we just weren't a
good match. Well, you see, for me, if I would
be on the date with you, that's not like a
(16:51):
straightforward answer, Like I know, it's there's a lot of
personal stuff, but eventually, like I would want to know
what was the red flags, because then me coming from
like a genue, like a good you know, like a good,
like a like a you know what I mean, like
being me like I would wanna maybe I don't make
(17:12):
those kind of mistakes or something like that, Like there's
always you know, just honest, so they know, because like
life is too short. Why do I want to waste
now with someone that is not telling me the truth
of trying to be who not they're not really are
or whatever, because then it's like, you know, there's no point. No,
(17:36):
that's that's great advice. I'm definitely gonna gonna remember that.
Thank you so much. Thank you, thanks for a question.
Have a nice day you too. We got the next question. Hi,
Hi tomorrow. It's so good to me. You nice to me.
It's too Um well i'll jump into my question. I
(17:58):
don't know how much time I have, so I'll get
right in. Uh dating, of course. Um, it's all about dating.
The older I get, the harder it is, the more
I'm confused at how forward I should be with men,
especially on a first date. So I'd love your take
(18:18):
on how much you think I guess women should put
out there with what their needs and wants in a partner,
especially on the first date or two, right, So I
think it really depends on the person. So do you
I want to go and have nice dinner in the
conversation with someone, or do you want to go and
(18:41):
get play? Do you want to have a good time
and go to a movie? And because well, because I'm
just saying how it is, you know, we're all humans.
We'll all want to have sex, we all want to eat,
the world all want to sleep, you know, so like
what's your intention? I think if you're like stupid, straightforward,
then they're like, yo, you don't want to do that
(19:03):
because that will be like, oh my god, like does
she do that with every single guy that she goes
on a date with. But then at the same time,
they're like there's always a moment during that evening or
dinner over drinks where you kind of like you feel
that moment where like that's the time where I'm either
like taking it to a different like level if you again,
(19:26):
if you like that, right, but a hundred percent agree
with you, Like it's so freaking hard when you get
older to like to because eventually it's not about like
and I think I'm just speaking for myself, I don't
know how other guys like, they're different, Like some of
my friends are like stay single, you know, like have
(19:49):
like you know, blah blah blah, Like you know, do
you think? And for me, it's not about this. It's
all about the good vibes. Like if I have a
good vibe with the person and like we're just you know,
chilling and it's all like really really connected, that's a
very different so and like the sex is just becomes
an addition to that, right, But I think, yeah, again,
(20:13):
it's what you want. What do you want? Well, I mean,
everyone tells me to stay single, so I'm like, but
as I'm dating, I'm like, this is fun and I
exactly like you said, I want to be able to
um enjoy it and have a friendship and see where
that leads. But then I'm also thinking, okay, do I
(20:34):
tell them I actually want to see how far this goes.
I'm looking for a life partner. So does that scare
the person at the get go? Um? You know it's not.
I think depends what It depends what this person wants.
You know, this person wants just to have fun, and
you'll be like, Okay, cool. We can have fun, right,
(20:57):
but then you know, yeah, yeah, then it's not meant today. Yeah,
just take it, take take a step by step, you
know what I mean. And but always always think about
like also like don't waste your time, you know what
I mean. If you see he's like a player, like
you know, you know, he's like one day he's with you,
(21:19):
and then you call him, he doesn't pick up the phone,
and he knows. He like there's like like I know,
something like making up stories be like oh yeah, like
I'm so sick because he's out in the movies with
his friends. So he doesn't really value you as you
know that much. So for him, you are as just
a fun moment like fun, you know, so then you listen, cool,
(21:41):
see you later. Hard to get into that guy's mind,
but I know we have to trust it's actually not
We're we're very primitive, Like we're very primitive. We're not
like very complex. You guys are more complex. Girls are
more complex. You're like overthinking, you're in your head. You
create that like it's like a moment like I and
(22:02):
I've noticed that it was like there's like a little
thought of something. You create this huge story with like
row to the left road to what if he did this?
Oh my god. And then it's actually like just because
my phone was on silence and I was driving and
I wasn't parking my car in the garage, and that's it. Yeah, yeah,
(22:25):
don't overthink it. Well, thank you for that. Thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you. Good. Okay, all right,
I see you too. Hello, Hi, good. I love the
art behind you. I love it so much. How are
(22:45):
you doing today. I'm doing great. I'm better now that
I'm talking to you. Thank you. I feel the same way.
So I'm supposed to just ask the question, is that
how we do it? Yeah, ask me anything, not really,
But because I'm a counselor, I feel like, um, the
(23:07):
stigma about counseling and therapy is like even deeper when
it comes to men's health. So my question for you is,
I guess maybe a little bit selfish for me to
help connect with men, but what do you think that
we as counselors can do to kind of bridge that
gap and and let men know that this is a
good place for them to be, you know, like maybe
(23:29):
content to put out there or just kind of ways
to cater to the the problems that men have so
that it looks attractive to go to counseling and get
that help. I'm dunk counseling twice. But I think the
(23:49):
way it's been done it was very and that was
like something that when uh, we both were trying to
save about the marriage, it was like I would say,
three years ago, oh uh and uh it was just
done in a very weird way because I wasn't to
her and uh, I remember I was literally during the day,
(24:11):
like we did it like twice a week. I had
to go in the audience, like when there's no like
there's no audience in the theater, it's just to be quiet,
like it's an empty theater, it's dark, and my ex
wife would be in the room with a person, you
know what I mean. So it was pre COVID, so
it felt like it felt like because we're trying to
(24:33):
figure it out, like we were trying to figure it
out us, what's happening, you know what I mean. And
it felt to me that the you know, that person
was like almost on her side, like they were trying
to like figure it out me instead of figured out us.
So I think for me at that moment was very
unfair because you know, I'm a human too. I have
(24:55):
my voice, like I wanna, I have my opinion, and
no one it's perfect. So it's not like you do
everything right and I do everything wrong. Let's fix me
for you a lot, right, So to me, it felt
that I was kind of like I just gave up,
was like, listen, there's no point doing it because it
just doesn't work, Like I don't want you to fix
(25:16):
me because we need to fix us. You know, it's
it's not you know. So it was harder for me
to open up, right, let's put it this because I
felt that was like a very different, different thing. But
I think for the man, I think it's a good
thing to be able to share and be like be
(25:39):
completely vulnerable. But not a lot of guys can't do
that because we're tough, you know, where the guy like
where you know, like, but at the same time, we're
very soft where you know, we have that soft side
like and I'm sure every single person has, you know,
like when there's a baby is born, like we're like,
oh my god, there's like you know, we do have that.
(26:01):
So I think it's it should be just like a
normal thing just to be like, guys shouldn't be scared,
to be vulnerable and be open and be just real
because no one's judging. Really, So it sounds like it's like,
you know, just knowing that it's a it's about getting
to know you, you know, more than having to fix you.
(26:25):
Is that well, I think it's I think a person
needs to get to the point where he says, like,
I'm actually ready for therapy. I actually want to go,
like I need it myself, Like I need to talk
to someone. But everyone is so different. We're all like
we're also different, you know what I mean. There's not
(26:46):
like the same people ever. So I think it's really
depends on the person. But to actually to talk someone
of like being hurt and like because I always wanted
to have that person like a third perspective looking at
my life, looking at my situation from aside and be
like this is what you need to do. Because people
(27:10):
are professional, like you are your professional in your craft,
like you study all of this and like there's like me,
I have no clue and you think about it like
I can teach you about a rundle walk and how
to tangle, but I can't figure out the problem because
it's actually depends how you look at it, and they're
the keys, like their tools to fix it. Right. So
(27:32):
I think for for God to just be like open
to too open to help, you know what I mean,
because I think it's important. I think every single person
needs help. Every single one needs help. But to realize
that and phase that and deal with that, you have
to get to that point, I think. So I think
(27:59):
I feel for me like I'm trying to reach people
before they get to the point because right now, I mean,
to be honest, the suicide rate is twice as high
for men that it is for women. So it's kind
of like, how do we reach men before they get
to that, you know, desperation point? You know, how do
we like kind of get you to want to go
(28:21):
to counseling before? And you know, I think it's what
you said before, the tough guy thing. I mean, I
know that that exists. And the men that I do
work with, I mean, once I get them in the door,
we're good, you know, like it's they they love it.
It's great, you know, being able to be exactly like
you said, open honest, knowing that I'm a neutral third party.
(28:41):
I'm literally just here like, whatever your problem is, I'm
here to help you with your problem. I don't care
what other people say, but I feel like it's hard
to try to convey that so that men are looking
for it and saying, hey, I want to be heard.
Let me go to a counselor so that I can
be heard. Right, I mean, it's really hard, It's really hard.
(29:05):
So Vanessa, thank you for a question. Thank you so much.
All Right, you guys, So that was our last failer
of Vanessa was flash of talking to her. She was awesome. Um,
it was a very deep conversation. But we're gonna take
a little break and when we come back, we're gonna
do with a cute and so glad. We had a
(29:31):
bunch of our listeners d MS email us, UM, a
bunch of questions for you. So are you ready? Yeah,
let's do it. Let's get to it. Okay. The first
question is gleb, you give off a very sexy vibe.
How do you do that? Is there a secret? Is
that something you learned or we're taught it's just my
(29:51):
hair flip seem just joking, I mean, sexy vibe? How
do you know? You know? Why? Don't know? It's just
first of all, First of all, whoever asked that question?
I really appreciate that. Thank you, um stop stop stop.
But I don't know, it's just thanks mom, and that
(30:14):
I guess, like you know, I always try to like
look after myself, like I work out and I tried
to eat healthy, and you know, it's just I think
sexy is not just the look, but also how like
how you feel about yourself, you know what I mean,
(30:34):
and just how you like carry yourself. I don't know, Honestly,
I'm really shy to answer to this question because I
don't like I'm like, I don't think I'm like sexy.
But anyone thinks what makes a woman sexy? What attracts
you the most? And what's the first thing you notice
what makes the woman sexy? I think it's an I
(30:57):
think it's an attitude, you know. I think it's at
the way she cares herself. Um. And also I think
the conversation, like the intelligent woman and a nice conversation.
I think it's super sexy. That's like what for me,
(31:19):
like I would be really attracted to um, smile, eyes, legs.
When do I introduce my new boyfriend to my kids?
When do you think it's the right time to do that.
One is too soon, not just for my kids, but
for my new boyfriend. Is it overwhelming for the man
(31:41):
to meet the children? Wow? Okay, So it's funny because
I went on a date with my current girlfriend. I
went on a date. It was the fourth of July
and on the fifth of July, master daughter. But for me,
as I have already two girls, so it's kind of
(32:02):
like a normal thing, like she's a single mom, she
has a daughter, and like the next day went to
grab some actually pizza. Um, it's I think for kids,
like it's like it's like like you might be a
little confused, but like if you explain, now, that's my
friend and whatever. Here's the thing. I think if it's
(32:23):
something that you're not sure about and you don't think that,
oh he's this guy is gonna stick around, like you know,
maybe it's not very serious or whatever. If you don't,
if you're not sure, don't do it. If you're sure
that you know you really like this person, this person
really likes you and you know he's just a good guy. Um,
(32:46):
it's okay. And I think it's to actually talk and
be like super straightforward saying like, oh, I have children,
Like I have a kid's never hide it ever, because
then the moment he finds out, like myths later that
you have a kid, then you'll be like what the ha,
Like you should have told me that on the first day,
(33:07):
you know what I mean. So but now this I
think everything is like social media. So like if you're
if he goes on your profile and you have pictures
with you, don't like he already knows that you have children,
you know, like he'll he'll be a cool You'll feel
the you know, you'll feel the energy from me, like
if he wants to talk to continue talking to because
(33:28):
he doesn't mind that he likes it that your mom.
The same thing for a guy too, you know, like
there are a lot of I mean, forgot maybe it's
a little different, but for a girl, yeah, I think
just you'll feel like I think each person individually will
feel when it's the right time. That's my opinion. What
(33:51):
are the challenges of dating as a single dad? Oh
my god, as a single like, I mean, it's just
kind of scary to be out there and like date
because you know, you know, like I don't want to
waste my time and I think it's like you never know.
(34:14):
It's like a like you go on the date, it's
like a box of chocolate. Like, you know, I've been
married for a fifteen years, so I've never like really
dated until like really recently. Uh and you know, I've
went on a few dates. And he was like, you
never know who you're gonna get, Like you remember that
moving forwards dump like when you have the box of
chocolate katies and like you pick and you never know
(34:35):
what's inside. That's exactly what you're getting. Like and then
I thought, like I was like I went to like
this expensive restaurant, like and I'm sitting with a person
and I'm like not having a good time and not
because there's something wrong with her, like she's beautiful and whatever,
but is there's no connection you know what? Even like
(34:57):
why am I wasting my time? Like you know, I
could have been home with kids and you know, uh,
be with them and spend time with them. So like
there were moments like I kind of dated, dated, dated,
and then I stopped for like two months and like
I didn't do anything, you know what I mean, because
I felt like such a waste of time and it's
(35:18):
you know, it's it's but at the same time, you
have to try otherwise you will never find out, do
you know what I mean? So it's like, yeah, so
it's a really deep question, guys. Really, I have no
idea how I answer it. Is when should you become
Instagram official? Do you guys even care about being Instagram official?
(35:44):
I think when you know, it's like when you know
it's right, you know it's right, you know. And I
don't remember exactly at the time, but I was always
kind of like, you know, it's like I'm dating this girl,
like you know, like and it's cool. So like there's
nothing like I don't need to hide anything, do you
know what I mean? Like why would I want to hide?
Like that's my life, you know, And that's like that's
(36:05):
my Instagram, that's my social media. I can both whatever
I want there, so and that's part of my life.
And you know, I just don't remember. It was like
a few months in, I guess something like that. Everyone
asks why do men cheat? But what do you really
(36:25):
think is a boredom with your current partner or are
there signs that things with your current wife or girlfriend
are over? Well? I think whoever thinks that everyone cheats
is wrong. Not everyone cheats. Uh, And again, cheating might
(36:48):
be a very different in a very different form. It
doesn't necessarily have to be like, uh, go and sleep
with someone you know. It could be you know, a connection,
It could be an attraction, it could be thoughts, it
could be something else, you know, and I guess, I guess.
It's like it's a hard relationship, was a really hard
(37:11):
work because you always need to be open and always
needs to not get sucked into like daily routine, especially
like when the young especially happens a lot like when
the young parents when they're like when there's just a
newborn baby, Like wife is at home, she's going on
like after pregnancy depression. He's working hours at work, he
(37:34):
comes back home. Everything is just a mass. There's like
diapers everywhere, and like he's like, oh my god. So
besides that, you have to both of you need to
like find it's kind and spend time together and just
dedicate that time to each other and kind of almost
like take that step back how you were when you've
(37:56):
met two you know, to have that because then in
the moment you lose and you know, she might like
the guy might not be because you know, like it's hard,
like especially with kids, like you have one life, you
like have this like period of your dating dating dating
(38:17):
that you get engaged, super excited, you're in love, you're
in love, and then you get buried. Like there's a
huge party, you know, on holiday, everything is amazing. That
you get pregnant and then nine months and there's a
baby and this whole world that you had before crashes.
But then you still work through, Like I think, I mean,
(38:39):
this came super bad, Like it's not doesn't crash. It's
a beautiful thing to everybody. But what the baby comes
with it, Like, it's a lot of it's a lot
of work. And if you don't have help like in
nanny or grandparents or something, it's really hard. So I
think just be like always open with the and if
(39:00):
you don't if you don't have something, if you're not
satisfied with something like so coovide, you know, and then
figure it out and if it doesn't work, don't waste
your time. If it doesn't work, don't waste your time
because you have your only one life that has given
to you and it's so precious for you, and don't
do it for the kids. Does things together for the kids,
(39:21):
because kids gonna grow up, they're gonna leave, and they're
gonna be even happier if the parents are happening, because
you know, we create our own happens. Okay, last question
for you. Do you think men change or are you
essentially the same guy you were in high school? And
if you have changed? How I think every single person
(39:46):
changes with age, with time, we all change. We all
have different values in life. We all learned, we become wiser,
we become you know, more experienced in life. We we
deal the situations differently. How like you know, different situations.
When you were in college, you do situation the same
(40:07):
situation that you know in one way, and now you
would do it a different way just because you're already
more experience in life. I think we're all changed. Is
just the word that you need to do on yourself. Uh,
that is important, and but you have to really go
with your gut feeling which you really want. And that's
(40:28):
I think really important for every single person. Like if
you lie to yourself and doing something that you really
don't want to do, eventually, it's not gonna work, you know,
So if you don't feel it, just don't do it.
You know what I mean, You guys, thank you so much.
(40:50):
The time is up, I gotta go, but thank you
for listening. I had a blast. It was a lot
of fun talking to you, answering all your questions. Uh.
You can find me on Instagram, webs of Chenko Official,
on Twitter, lebt under Sports of Chenko UM and also
come see me on tour. Were you going on tour? UM?
(41:13):
Starting Jor the seventh in Richmond, Virginia and we're going
all the way through March twenty seventh of March, the
last shows in California. So UM. Anyway, lots of love.
I had a blasting to thank you for having me,
thanks for listening to How Men Think, and I heart Radio.
(41:33):
London Audio Production
We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This
is how men thick and I heard radio podcast. Hey guys,
I'm lips up Chenko. You know me as a professional
danswering boreographer danswer with the stars and I am stuper
happy to co post and be a guest host. Um
on how men think? I'm gonna be answering all your
(00:24):
questions and the the main like, the fascinating question is
that how men think? So let's get started. Producers put
me in the hot steed and I have to answer
all of these eleven questions that are in front of me,
and let's start a question number one? What are you
known for? Tell us about yourself what I'm known for.
(00:48):
I mean, I'm hot Russian professional board dancer and dancer
with the stars. That's what I'm known for. But I'm
also a girl that I have two beautiful daughters living
just turned eleven yesterday actually, and I have a lot
who's four years old. Um, and you know my life
is around them and dance and that's what I've pretty
(01:10):
much like known for. And um yeah, who are you
in your personal life? Who am I in my personal life? Oh?
What does it mean? Mean? Like I don't even know
who are you in the person? Like I think, um,
you know I am, you know, I'm a dad. Number one.
(01:32):
I think I'm I've been. I'm dreaven always to be
a better person every day. I come from nothing. Uh
and I'm in Hollywood living literally in American dream Like
if you would like it would have more time, like
I would tell you, like my whole life story, which
is I think it's pretty crazy, but um yeah, I
(01:54):
just I'm just just a regular normal guy with two
kids saying go and you know, trying to trying to
teach celebrities to chat to walk. What three TV shows
are you binge watching right now? That's a good one, Um,
the three D TV shows? So I would say number one.
(02:15):
I'm still like it's an older show, but I think
like if someone like I haven't watched it as the
money has, I'm obsessed with the show. I think it's
an incredible show. The recent one that I just watched
is with Game also Super Sick, Like I love that show.
And the one that I just started watching is The Made.
(02:37):
I think it's like a pretty like a intense show
that kind of like actually, you know, see what's going
on with like people with other people like where they're
going through. You know what I mean is it's like
it's a really beautiful shot at and produced. I think
it's a really good show. What is your favorite food?
What's my favorite food? What's my favorite food? I think pizza.
(03:07):
I love pizza like I love any kind of pizza.
I think I can eat pizza every day. Um yeah,
that's like my favorite food. I know it's really bad.
It's like super healthy. And I supposed to represent like
a health and wellness and I was like pizza, you know,
so yeah, I love pizza. Tell us about your career. Okay,
(03:31):
my career. Um, look, my career is pretty crazy. I
you know, I grew up a mom originally from Moscow, Russia.
Grew up with mom and dad, and they kind of
put me in the dance gas and I started, you know, dancing,
and by the age of thirteen fourteen, I knew it
(03:54):
was gonna be my career. Like in my culture is
like if you do something for a specially for parents,
and they probably put me in dance colleges because they
wanted to keep me off the streets and like you know,
for kids to do something, but then they push you.
They push you so hard that it becomes your you know,
like it becomes you know, something that you do, and
then you have to do it great and you have
(04:17):
to put all your energy into it. And I danced
with all my life and then then moved to different
country a lot via I dance there with a girl
represent the country for a couple of years. Uh. Came
back to Russian kind of at the age of seventeen eighteen,
I realized I was like, I don't really want to
do dance anymore, Like there's like, you know, I only
(04:39):
spend money because there's no like price, uh money for
the competitions, and that was like a Russian champion at
that time, Like you always have to travel on your
with your own expand you have to take lessons, you
have to buy coustomes, buy shoes, so it becomes like
an expensive hobby. So it doesn't give you unless you teach.
But and with teaching, like in Russia, like you can
(05:00):
to really make anything. So I was like, I gotta
do something. So I became a fitness dance fitness instructor
in one of the fitness centers in Moscow, and one
um kind of mine and she came up to me
after the class. She was like, have you ever tried modeling?
And I was like, no, never tried modeling. She was like,
I'm gonna take you to model agency. So she brought
(05:20):
me to model agency. I uh, I started doing modeling
and became like super successful. Like I was like on
every cover of the magazine in Russian doing music videos
and with this, and like I was like, oh my god,
like I'm gonna be the next breath pit. But for
me to become an ex breath pit, I have to
(05:41):
move to America, you know what I mean. So I
was like great, So I moved to America and I
lived in New York for about three years. I did uh,
I did modeling, and I kind of keep myself going.
I was doing UM still talking they studio UM, and
(06:02):
that's actually the time when dance start. As you just
started to remember in on the time score that they
build this huge glass box where me and my partner
were like promoting this we'll start of this new brand
new TV show where UM coming up. What's your biggest
fear in life? Heights? I'm afraid of heights. I'm like
(06:24):
super scared of heights. What makes you the most happy.
I think just the time with family and kids, and
like what makes me most happy is the positive people,
the energy, you know, like every person has its own energy,
and you know, I just love being around good people
(06:45):
with good energy and interrupt and just have this good
vibe that look like makes me super happy. What's your
biggest pet? Peeve um? I'm like I have like a
major O C D. Like I hate when someone washes
the dishes and they don't like wipe the sink around,
(07:06):
like if they if I could see like splashes of
water around the sink, that frets me out, like I
can't do it, and here like I can't like it.
That's like Scott now like like if I stay here
on the floor, was like, what is your ideal Saturday morning?
Oh my god, what's my ideal Saturday morning? Listen? Simple
(07:32):
sipping a champagne on the boat and central pain. I've
never done this, but that will be ideal on Saturday morning.
Are you more of the athlete or the armchair quarterback?
I'm more than I'm more an athlete. I'm super active. Yeah.
And lastly, what keeps you motivated? What keeps you motivated?
(07:54):
Never never being satisfied with with it's always like it's
weird because and that's like something that I think it's
either um like uh like a cultural thing or the
way we've been like I've been brought up. It's like
(08:16):
it's not being negative, but it's not being satisfied hundred
percent because so you think like, oh you can like
I always can do better, right, so like you can
do better than like you could have like even like
sometimes like let's simple example, right, like we we do
with dance performing dance right, and dance goes great, We've
got great scores on the show or something, but then
I look at the video like and I'm never ever
(08:39):
satisfied like, oh, that was awesome, you know, Like I
told myself to do that because I'm working with someone
who's never danced before. So I have to be positive
and be like, oh that was great, you know, like
actually when I look at it, even for myself, I'm
like this one could have been like this one could
have been better. So that keeps you motivated just to
be better in junior, you know what I mean, Like
(09:01):
with everything I do. Alright, guys, so we're gonna take
a quick break and when we come back. I'm gonna
answer all your questions. Hey guys, and Ashley from the
Almost Famous podcast, It's that time of year where drama
fills the air. The Bachelor is back with an all
new season premiering January three. There's a new host, Jesse Palmer,
(09:24):
and a brand new Bachelor, Clayton. Clayton is a Midwest
boy that has that great smile, nice teeth, and he's
really tall as let's call it what it is, he's
a beefcake. Okay, Well, Clayton seems to be a good
guy though, and he can't wait to find love, get married,
and have kids. And he believes more than anything that
(09:47):
his future wife is on this show. It sounds like
a fairy tale but also a bit of an emotional
world coaster, because Clayton tells three different women he's falling
in love with him. Technically, he told one, I couldn't
be more sure that I'm falling in love with you,
and another one, I'm falling in love with you, and
the third one, I am in love with you. You
(10:10):
don't miss a thing. It's your years of over analyzing
everything that guys say. But his heart is in the
right place. But other parts of him as we find
out what he admits to two different women that he
was intimate with both of them. Yeah, I don't think
it's gonna go over well, we'll be breaking down at
all on the almost famous podcast Ben is Married Now
(10:32):
Well Ashley's a mom will change our opinions of what
we think is acceptable single behavior. Good question find out
on the almost Famous podcast on our Heart Radio and
wherever you listen to podcasts. Al Right, guys, let's get
(10:54):
to our first caller and uh yeah, here we go. Hi.
My question would be, Um, do men ever learn to
communicate better on their own? To communicate that? I think, yeah,
hundred percent. I think it's all about self improvement and
if he I think, for it depends on the person again,
(11:17):
but for me personally, I think over the years, like
I've learned a lot of things, you know, and it's
not you know, you want to improve yourself and just
be better for the person that you're with, you know
what I mean. I think it's like super important, um,
not just to just to communicate, you know, and listen,
(11:39):
like always try to like listen that you know, whoever
is in front of you trying to tell you something.
You know, um, and let the person speak and like
try to like understand, not like stand like be stubborn
like no, no, like you know, but like try to
understand what this person is trying to tell you, because
(12:01):
it's you know, it's important to hear. It's important to hear,
and it's important to listen. That's how you can, you know,
improve yourself otherwise to just being like super closed off.
And you know what do you think, Emma, you agree
with me? Yeah? But does that come in part with
(12:24):
growing with your partner? Do you think like a man
could understand how to communicate with a girl better without
having their partner instruct them or get criticism from them. Well,
there's the situations, right, there's situations like give me an example, right,
(12:44):
let's stay with dating, right, and you want to go
somewhere for Christmas and I don't want to go somewhere
for Christmas? Right, So what do we do talk about exactly?
We talk about it, and we decide and let listen,
(13:05):
you tell them your opinion why you want to go there.
Like they'll be like, listen, maybe we'll go to you know,
to a lake or something, or go to Mexico or
something like that. So it's it's all about the conversation.
I think people need to have a conversation and be
able to hear each other, do you know what I mean?
(13:26):
So like putting yourself on that person's place and be like, well,
I understand where they come up, unless there's like a
ridiculous like you know, so, I mean that makes sense.
I guess it also depends on the stage of where
you are in a relationship. If you guys are together
or just beginning to talk, well, I think it doesn't matter.
(13:48):
I think if you if you're married for fifteen years
or you just start dating. Do you know what I mean?
It's it's always gonna be something like, but it's just
a different like how you're saying. It's a different stage
of the conversation, do you know what I mean? But
there's always that you have to always me. If you
don't like something, tell me and I'll be like no, no, no,
like or I'll be like okay, cool, yeah, like okay,
(14:11):
I'll whatever. But thanks for calling. I appreciate your good question.
Thank you appreci All right, here we go the next color. Hannah. Hi, Um,
my question is I'm wondering if it is considered a
red flag if you talk about an ex boyfriend or
girlfriend on a first date. I mean, it depends how
(14:40):
you talk about it, do you know what I mean? Like,
so I went on a date, uh, and I actually
had a conversation with the girl who I'm actually seeing
now on the first day. We talked about my action.
I've been married for fifteen years, but I'm we're super
cool now have to divorce. But I think it's not
(15:04):
It depends on if you're positive and you're genuinely nice
person and you're like, it's not like unless you're like
shooting on someone, then that would be like, oh, that's
so weird. Like if he talks about her like that,
like what he's going to talk about me or something
like that, that's you know. I think it depends on
the person really, But what do you think I think?
(15:25):
I mean, I think I've been on dates in the
past where they ask if I've been in relationships before,
and I've always been hesitant to answer yes or no
because I don't want them to think I'm talking about
my ex boyfriend too much. I tell you this straight on.
You gotta be you gotta be straightforward, You've gotta be honest.
And if he's okay to that, he's cool because then
(15:45):
you can take it to the next level or whatever.
But if you're like trying to hide something or not
to say something or choose the words how you say,
that's already not like a real thing because you're trying
to like cater like to someone who you're know I
really are you know what I mean? You always have
to be yourself and just be like, Yo, I've been
(16:05):
on twenty five thousand dates did not work. Hopefully you're
the one because I like or something. Just be super
cool yeah, and be like I think personally, you know
what I mean, if we're going the date and they'll
be like okay, Hannah, how many relationships serious relationships have
you had in the past. I'm asking like four four
(16:31):
How that was the last relationship? How long was your
last relationship? Six months? Six months? Why would you guys
break up? Just what some red flags? I think on
his part and maybe my part, we just weren't a
good match. Well, you see, for me, if I would
be on the date with you, that's not like a
(16:51):
straightforward answer, Like I know, it's there's a lot of
personal stuff, but eventually, like I would want to know
what was the red flags, because then me coming from
like a genue, like a good you know, like a good,
like a like a you know what I mean, like
being me like I would wanna maybe I don't make
(17:12):
those kind of mistakes or something like that, Like there's
always you know, just honest, so they know, because like
life is too short. Why do I want to waste
now with someone that is not telling me the truth
of trying to be who not they're not really are
or whatever, because then it's like, you know, there's no point. No,
(17:36):
that's that's great advice. I'm definitely gonna gonna remember that.
Thank you so much. Thank you, thanks for a question.
Have a nice day you too. We got the next question. Hi,
Hi tomorrow. It's so good to me. You nice to me.
It's too Um well i'll jump into my question. I
(17:58):
don't know how much time I have, so I'll get
right in. Uh dating, of course. Um, it's all about dating.
The older I get, the harder it is, the more
I'm confused at how forward I should be with men,
especially on a first date. So I'd love your take
(18:18):
on how much you think I guess women should put
out there with what their needs and wants in a partner,
especially on the first date or two, right, So I
think it really depends on the person. So do you
I want to go and have nice dinner in the
conversation with someone, or do you want to go and
(18:41):
get play? Do you want to have a good time
and go to a movie? And because well, because I'm
just saying how it is, you know, we're all humans.
We'll all want to have sex, we all want to eat,
the world all want to sleep, you know, so like
what's your intention? I think if you're like stupid, straightforward,
then they're like, yo, you don't want to do that
(19:03):
because that will be like, oh my god, like does
she do that with every single guy that she goes
on a date with. But then at the same time,
they're like there's always a moment during that evening or
dinner over drinks where you kind of like you feel
that moment where like that's the time where I'm either
like taking it to a different like level if you again,
(19:26):
if you like that, right, but a hundred percent agree
with you, Like it's so freaking hard when you get
older to like to because eventually it's not about like
and I think I'm just speaking for myself, I don't
know how other guys like, they're different, Like some of
my friends are like stay single, you know, like have
(19:49):
like you know, blah blah blah, Like you know, do
you think? And for me, it's not about this. It's
all about the good vibes. Like if I have a
good vibe with the person and like we're just you know,
chilling and it's all like really really connected, that's a
very different so and like the sex is just becomes
an addition to that, right, But I think, yeah, again,
(20:13):
it's what you want. What do you want? Well, I mean,
everyone tells me to stay single, so I'm like, but
as I'm dating, I'm like, this is fun and I
exactly like you said, I want to be able to
um enjoy it and have a friendship and see where
that leads. But then I'm also thinking, okay, do I
(20:34):
tell them I actually want to see how far this goes.
I'm looking for a life partner. So does that scare
the person at the get go? Um? You know it's not.
I think depends what It depends what this person wants.
You know, this person wants just to have fun, and
you'll be like, Okay, cool. We can have fun, right,
(20:57):
but then you know, yeah, yeah, then it's not meant today. Yeah,
just take it, take take a step by step, you
know what I mean. And but always always think about
like also like don't waste your time, you know what
I mean. If you see he's like a player, like
you know, you know, he's like one day he's with you,
(21:19):
and then you call him, he doesn't pick up the phone,
and he knows. He like there's like like I know,
something like making up stories be like oh yeah, like
I'm so sick because he's out in the movies with
his friends. So he doesn't really value you as you
know that much. So for him, you are as just
a fun moment like fun, you know, so then you listen, cool,
(21:41):
see you later. Hard to get into that guy's mind,
but I know we have to trust it's actually not
We're we're very primitive, Like we're very primitive. We're not
like very complex. You guys are more complex. Girls are
more complex. You're like overthinking, you're in your head. You
create that like it's like a moment like I and
(22:02):
I've noticed that it was like there's like a little
thought of something. You create this huge story with like
row to the left road to what if he did this?
Oh my god. And then it's actually like just because
my phone was on silence and I was driving and
I wasn't parking my car in the garage, and that's it. Yeah, yeah,
(22:25):
don't overthink it. Well, thank you for that. Thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you. Good. Okay, all right,
I see you too. Hello, Hi, good. I love the
art behind you. I love it so much. How are
(22:45):
you doing today. I'm doing great. I'm better now that
I'm talking to you. Thank you. I feel the same way.
So I'm supposed to just ask the question, is that
how we do it? Yeah, ask me anything, not really,
But because I'm a counselor, I feel like, um, the
(23:07):
stigma about counseling and therapy is like even deeper when
it comes to men's health. So my question for you is,
I guess maybe a little bit selfish for me to
help connect with men, but what do you think that
we as counselors can do to kind of bridge that
gap and and let men know that this is a
good place for them to be, you know, like maybe
(23:29):
content to put out there or just kind of ways
to cater to the the problems that men have so
that it looks attractive to go to counseling and get
that help. I'm dunk counseling twice. But I think the
(23:49):
way it's been done it was very and that was
like something that when uh, we both were trying to
save about the marriage, it was like I would say,
three years ago, oh uh and uh it was just
done in a very weird way because I wasn't to
her and uh, I remember I was literally during the day,
(24:11):
like we did it like twice a week. I had
to go in the audience, like when there's no like
there's no audience in the theater, it's just to be quiet,
like it's an empty theater, it's dark, and my ex
wife would be in the room with a person, you
know what I mean. So it was pre COVID, so
it felt like it felt like because we're trying to
(24:33):
figure it out, like we were trying to figure it
out us, what's happening, you know what I mean. And
it felt to me that the you know, that person
was like almost on her side, like they were trying
to like figure it out me instead of figured out us.
So I think for me at that moment was very
unfair because you know, I'm a human too. I have
(24:55):
my voice, like I wanna, I have my opinion, and
no one it's perfect. So it's not like you do
everything right and I do everything wrong. Let's fix me
for you a lot, right, So to me, it felt
that I was kind of like I just gave up,
was like, listen, there's no point doing it because it
just doesn't work, Like I don't want you to fix
(25:16):
me because we need to fix us. You know, it's
it's not you know. So it was harder for me
to open up, right, let's put it this because I
felt that was like a very different, different thing. But
I think for the man, I think it's a good
thing to be able to share and be like be
(25:39):
completely vulnerable. But not a lot of guys can't do
that because we're tough, you know, where the guy like
where you know, like, but at the same time, we're
very soft where you know, we have that soft side
like and I'm sure every single person has, you know,
like when there's a baby is born, like we're like,
oh my god, there's like you know, we do have that.
(26:01):
So I think it's it should be just like a
normal thing just to be like, guys shouldn't be scared,
to be vulnerable and be open and be just real
because no one's judging. Really, So it sounds like it's like,
you know, just knowing that it's a it's about getting
to know you, you know, more than having to fix you.
(26:25):
Is that well, I think it's I think a person
needs to get to the point where he says, like,
I'm actually ready for therapy. I actually want to go,
like I need it myself, Like I need to talk
to someone. But everyone is so different. We're all like
we're also different, you know what I mean. There's not
(26:46):
like the same people ever. So I think it's really
depends on the person. But to actually to talk someone
of like being hurt and like because I always wanted
to have that person like a third perspective looking at
my life, looking at my situation from aside and be
like this is what you need to do. Because people
(27:10):
are professional, like you are your professional in your craft,
like you study all of this and like there's like me,
I have no clue and you think about it like
I can teach you about a rundle walk and how
to tangle, but I can't figure out the problem because
it's actually depends how you look at it, and they're
the keys, like their tools to fix it. Right. So
(27:32):
I think for for God to just be like open
to too open to help, you know what I mean,
because I think it's important. I think every single person
needs help. Every single one needs help. But to realize
that and phase that and deal with that, you have
to get to that point, I think. So I think
(27:59):
I feel for me like I'm trying to reach people
before they get to the point because right now, I mean,
to be honest, the suicide rate is twice as high
for men that it is for women. So it's kind
of like, how do we reach men before they get
to that, you know, desperation point? You know, how do
we like kind of get you to want to go
(28:21):
to counseling before? And you know, I think it's what
you said before, the tough guy thing. I mean, I
know that that exists. And the men that I do
work with, I mean, once I get them in the door,
we're good, you know, like it's they they love it.
It's great, you know, being able to be exactly like
you said, open honest, knowing that I'm a neutral third party.
(28:41):
I'm literally just here like, whatever your problem is, I'm
here to help you with your problem. I don't care
what other people say, but I feel like it's hard
to try to convey that so that men are looking
for it and saying, hey, I want to be heard.
Let me go to a counselor so that I can
be heard. Right, I mean, it's really hard, It's really hard.
(29:05):
So Vanessa, thank you for a question. Thank you so much.
All Right, you guys, So that was our last failer
of Vanessa was flash of talking to her. She was awesome. Um,
it was a very deep conversation. But we're gonna take
a little break and when we come back, we're gonna
do with a cute and so glad. We had a
(29:31):
bunch of our listeners d MS email us, UM, a
bunch of questions for you. So are you ready? Yeah,
let's do it. Let's get to it. Okay. The first
question is gleb, you give off a very sexy vibe.
How do you do that? Is there a secret? Is
that something you learned or we're taught it's just my
(29:51):
hair flip seem just joking, I mean, sexy vibe? How
do you know? You know? Why? Don't know? It's just
first of all, First of all, whoever asked that question?
I really appreciate that. Thank you, um stop stop stop.
But I don't know, it's just thanks mom, and that
(30:14):
I guess, like you know, I always try to like
look after myself, like I work out and I tried
to eat healthy, and you know, it's just I think
sexy is not just the look, but also how like
how you feel about yourself, you know what I mean,
(30:34):
and just how you like carry yourself. I don't know, Honestly,
I'm really shy to answer to this question because I
don't like I'm like, I don't think I'm like sexy.
But anyone thinks what makes a woman sexy? What attracts
you the most? And what's the first thing you notice
what makes the woman sexy? I think it's an I
(30:57):
think it's an attitude, you know. I think it's at
the way she cares herself. Um. And also I think
the conversation, like the intelligent woman and a nice conversation.
I think it's super sexy. That's like what for me,
(31:19):
like I would be really attracted to um, smile, eyes, legs.
When do I introduce my new boyfriend to my kids?
When do you think it's the right time to do that.
One is too soon, not just for my kids, but
for my new boyfriend. Is it overwhelming for the man
(31:41):
to meet the children? Wow? Okay, So it's funny because
I went on a date with my current girlfriend. I
went on a date. It was the fourth of July
and on the fifth of July, master daughter. But for me,
as I have already two girls, so it's kind of
(32:02):
like a normal thing, like she's a single mom, she
has a daughter, and like the next day went to
grab some actually pizza. Um, it's I think for kids,
like it's like it's like like you might be a
little confused, but like if you explain, now, that's my
friend and whatever. Here's the thing. I think if it's
(32:23):
something that you're not sure about and you don't think that,
oh he's this guy is gonna stick around, like you know,
maybe it's not very serious or whatever. If you don't,
if you're not sure, don't do it. If you're sure
that you know you really like this person, this person
really likes you and you know he's just a good guy. Um,
(32:46):
it's okay. And I think it's to actually talk and
be like super straightforward saying like, oh, I have children,
Like I have a kid's never hide it ever, because
then the moment he finds out, like myths later that
you have a kid, then you'll be like what the ha,
Like you should have told me that on the first day,
(33:07):
you know what I mean. So but now this I
think everything is like social media. So like if you're
if he goes on your profile and you have pictures
with you, don't like he already knows that you have children,
you know, like he'll he'll be a cool You'll feel
the you know, you'll feel the energy from me, like
if he wants to talk to continue talking to because
(33:28):
he doesn't mind that he likes it that your mom.
The same thing for a guy too, you know, like
there are a lot of I mean, forgot maybe it's
a little different, but for a girl, yeah, I think
just you'll feel like I think each person individually will
feel when it's the right time. That's my opinion. What
(33:51):
are the challenges of dating as a single dad? Oh
my god, as a single like, I mean, it's just
kind of scary to be out there and like date
because you know, you know, like I don't want to
waste my time and I think it's like you never know.
(34:14):
It's like a like you go on the date, it's
like a box of chocolate. Like, you know, I've been
married for a fifteen years, so I've never like really
dated until like really recently. Uh and you know, I've
went on a few dates. And he was like, you
never know who you're gonna get, Like you remember that
moving forwards dump like when you have the box of
chocolate katies and like you pick and you never know
(34:35):
what's inside. That's exactly what you're getting. Like and then
I thought, like I was like I went to like
this expensive restaurant, like and I'm sitting with a person
and I'm like not having a good time and not
because there's something wrong with her, like she's beautiful and whatever,
but is there's no connection you know what? Even like
(34:57):
why am I wasting my time? Like you know, I
could have been home with kids and you know, uh,
be with them and spend time with them. So like
there were moments like I kind of dated, dated, dated,
and then I stopped for like two months and like
I didn't do anything, you know what I mean, because
I felt like such a waste of time and it's
(35:18):
you know, it's it's but at the same time, you
have to try otherwise you will never find out, do
you know what I mean? So it's like, yeah, so
it's a really deep question, guys. Really, I have no
idea how I answer it. Is when should you become
Instagram official? Do you guys even care about being Instagram official?
(35:44):
I think when you know, it's like when you know
it's right, you know it's right, you know. And I
don't remember exactly at the time, but I was always
kind of like, you know, it's like I'm dating this girl,
like you know, like and it's cool. So like there's
nothing like I don't need to hide anything, do you
know what I mean? Like why would I want to hide?
Like that's my life, you know, And that's like that's
(36:05):
my Instagram, that's my social media. I can both whatever
I want there, so and that's part of my life.
And you know, I just don't remember. It was like
a few months in, I guess something like that. Everyone
asks why do men cheat? But what do you really
(36:25):
think is a boredom with your current partner or are
there signs that things with your current wife or girlfriend
are over? Well? I think whoever thinks that everyone cheats
is wrong. Not everyone cheats. Uh, And again, cheating might
(36:48):
be a very different in a very different form. It
doesn't necessarily have to be like, uh, go and sleep
with someone you know. It could be you know, a connection,
It could be an attraction, it could be thoughts, it
could be something else, you know, and I guess, I guess.
It's like it's a hard relationship, was a really hard
(37:11):
work because you always need to be open and always
needs to not get sucked into like daily routine, especially
like when the young especially happens a lot like when
the young parents when they're like when there's just a
newborn baby, Like wife is at home, she's going on
like after pregnancy depression. He's working hours at work, he
(37:34):
comes back home. Everything is just a mass. There's like
diapers everywhere, and like he's like, oh my god. So
besides that, you have to both of you need to
like find it's kind and spend time together and just
dedicate that time to each other and kind of almost
like take that step back how you were when you've
(37:56):
met two you know, to have that because then in
the moment you lose and you know, she might like
the guy might not be because you know, like it's hard,
like especially with kids, like you have one life, you
like have this like period of your dating dating dating
(38:17):
that you get engaged, super excited, you're in love, you're
in love, and then you get buried. Like there's a
huge party, you know, on holiday, everything is amazing. That
you get pregnant and then nine months and there's a
baby and this whole world that you had before crashes.
But then you still work through, Like I think, I mean,
(38:39):
this came super bad, Like it's not doesn't crash. It's
a beautiful thing to everybody. But what the baby comes
with it, Like, it's a lot of it's a lot
of work. And if you don't have help like in
nanny or grandparents or something, it's really hard. So I
think just be like always open with the and if
(39:00):
you don't if you don't have something, if you're not
satisfied with something like so coovide, you know, and then
figure it out and if it doesn't work, don't waste
your time. If it doesn't work, don't waste your time
because you have your only one life that has given
to you and it's so precious for you, and don't
do it for the kids. Does things together for the kids,
(39:21):
because kids gonna grow up, they're gonna leave, and they're
gonna be even happier if the parents are happening, because
you know, we create our own happens. Okay, last question
for you. Do you think men change or are you
essentially the same guy you were in high school? And
if you have changed? How I think every single person
(39:46):
changes with age, with time, we all change. We all
have different values in life. We all learned, we become wiser,
we become you know, more experienced in life. We we
deal the situations differently. How like you know, different situations.
When you were in college, you do situation the same
(40:07):
situation that you know in one way, and now you
would do it a different way just because you're already
more experience in life. I think we're all changed. Is
just the word that you need to do on yourself. Uh,
that is important, and but you have to really go
with your gut feeling which you really want. And that's
(40:28):
I think really important for every single person. Like if
you lie to yourself and doing something that you really
don't want to do, eventually, it's not gonna work, you know,
So if you don't feel it, just don't do it.
You know what I mean, You guys, thank you so much.
(40:50):
The time is up, I gotta go, but thank you
for listening. I had a blast. It was a lot
of fun talking to you, answering all your questions. Uh.
You can find me on Instagram, webs of Chenko Official,
on Twitter, lebt under Sports of Chenko UM and also
come see me on tour. Were you going on tour? UM?
(41:13):
Starting Jor the seventh in Richmond, Virginia and we're going
all the way through March twenty seventh of March, the
last shows in California. So UM. Anyway, lots of love.
I had a blasting to thank you for having me,
thanks for listening to How Men Think, and I heart Radio.
(41:33):
London Audio Production
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Therapy Gecko
An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.