April 21, 2022 • 38 mins
Things are getting hot… Like 98 degrees! Boy band hunk, Jeff Timmons is in control. If anyone knows a thing or two about the ladies, it’s a musician in a boy band. Let us know your questions - DM us @HowMenThinkPodcast or email us MEN@iheartradio.com!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This
is how Men Thick and I heard radio podcast. Hey,
what's going on everybody. I'm Jeff Timmins and you may
know me from the boyband Degrees. I'm so happy and
thrilled to be guest hosting How Men Think. I'm gonna
answer all your questions and try to help you understand
how Men Think. But first, this is eleven Questions with
(00:23):
Jeff Timmins. So let's get into it. What are you
known for? Well? Uh, mostly known for being a member
of ninety eight Degrees, which has been an amazing run
for me. It's our twenty fifth year. Uh this year
Degrees being in existence. Although it makes me feel really old,
I feel very blessed and fortunate to get out there
and still be performing for such wonderful fans and be
(00:44):
doing this for a living and supporting my family. So
I think all of you a little bit about me.
I love music, of course, that's the obvious thing. I'm
a big family man. I've got five kids, They're all amazing.
I've been very blessed, got a beautiful wife, and you
know I like to work behind the scenes as well.
I'm a big studio guy. Um like to do music
and produce stuff for other people, I mean the tech space.
(01:06):
It's like to keep busy. So who am I in
my personal life? I'm just a guy that likes the
screw around. I don't take myself too seriously at all.
I take other people seriously. But I like to have
a lot of fun, roll with the flow, make people laugh,
and you know, enjoy family and friends and you know,
the little things in life are are very very important
to me. All right. What are three shows that I'm
(01:28):
binge watching. Well, there's a show called Elite. There's a
lot of these Spanish shows that are translated to English
on Netflix that I really love. Elite is one of them.
Money Heisten is another one. And then I've really been
kind of getting my guilty pleasure from the Pam and
Tommy story on Hulu, which I absolutely love. What is
my favorite food? Well, it's kind of a toss up.
(01:50):
I'm a low carb guy, so it's usually meat and
cheese and seafood and things like that. I would have
to say steak and lobster. I'm you know, I like
the finer things in life, so I'd say steaks, steak,
steak and lobster my favorite foods. Tell us about your career, Well,
I have been totally blessed. Uh, it's been a wonderful ride.
(02:13):
I'm from a very small town in Ohio where you know,
a lot of not a lot of people kind of
venture off into the entertainment business. UM. I was inspired
by the group Boys Two Men and wanted to create
a similar group just like that. Um, we didn't have
the Internet and uh things that like like like um,
Twitter and Snapchat and YouTube at our disposal and TikTok,
(02:36):
so you literally had to go pursue your dreams. I
drove with my original band across the country to l
a Um to pursue the dream and got lucky. You know.
We ended up singing backstage at a Boys de Men
concert ironically, and we're fortunate enough to get signed and
we got signed to Motown Records, which is a legendary label. UM,
(02:57):
like Boys Demand Did. We toured the world, we sold
millions and millions of records and we're still around twenty
five years later with great fans that embrace our music
and we enjoy the camaraderie of our brotherhood of getting
up on stage and acting silly and singing songs for
our living. So it's been a blessing. We've got to
perform with Stevie Wonder on a song for Disney's Mulan
(03:20):
with Mariah Carey that went and Joe that a song
that went number one. We got to perform for Michael
Jackson with Usher and Luther Vandrow's anything you can imagine.
We've been fortunate enough to do and and we never
took different granted. So it's been an amazing ride. What's
my biggest fear in life? I think just not being successful.
I mean I think that, uh you know, it's important
(03:42):
for me to always get better every day. Uh, never
settled for mediocrity. I don't expect that of everybody else
that I meet in my life, particularly my beautiful wife
and my kids. But for me, it's always achieving something
new and it doesn't necessarily have to do with monetization
and making money or being famous. It's just getting better
every day. So my fear is to become relaxed and
(04:04):
not be a success or not really have the influence
and impact that I hope to do to encourage others
to pursue their dreams. So the fear of failure is
probably my biggest driver, ah, my biggest pet peeve. On
that note, I despise people that are lazy. I like
people that like to kick back and take it easy,
(04:25):
but laziness drives me absolutely crazy. Absolutely my pet peete laziness.
What makes me most happy seeing smiling faces in my family.
I mean, I think it's really really important. Um. The
world is always, uh, you know, a challenging place to
live in and life is hard, so you know, the
small victories for me or when I see smiling faces
(04:47):
on all of my kids, I see happy faces, and
you know, when my wife's happy, that's always nice. My
ideal Saturday morning, well, you know, Saturday, the day is
kind of blur together. I travel a lot. I'm very
fortunate to do, and um, so Saturdays could be a Sunday,
it could be a Monday. I'm always working, which is
a really very fortunate thing for myself. Um, but you know,
(05:09):
if if you're talking about the weekend, a Saturday morning
would be watching college football. I know that's a boring answer,
but I'm a big sports fan and being from a
small town in Ohio that revolves around football, Massillon, Ohio, Um,
I love watching my college football and I'm just hanging
out with my kids on a Saturday if I'm in
town and if we're all together. But traditionally I'm I'm
(05:30):
watching college football, either with the guys in ninety eight
degrees or even by myself. But that's a that's a
typical Saturday for me. Am, I'm more of an athlete
or our share quarterback. Um, well, I'd like to think.
I'd like to think of an athlete. I but you
know what, I'm just I'm coming to terms with the
fact that I'm not that good of an athlete, so
(05:51):
I'm sort of both. I try to keep in shape.
I wanted to play football collegiately, and of course in
the NFL where I'm from, it's all about that. And
unfortunately I was vertically challenged. I didn't have enough skills,
wasn't good. I mean, the list goes on and on.
But I would say now I've I've come to terms
with the fact that I'm an arm chair quarterback. I
(06:13):
watched you criticize the coaches and throw stuff at the
TV and say they should have any better choices and
all that stuff. But at the end of the day,
I'm just a fan like everybody else. What keeps you motivated? Um? Well,
I have a lot of self motivation. UM. I think
you know, striving to be successful is an important thing
(06:34):
for me, and to get better every day. Like I mentioned, Um,
but my family does you know? I want to be
able to provide for them so they don't have to struggle.
I've been very fortunate, but you know, along the ways
there are high highs and low lows in the entertainment industry.
And if I can prevent anybody in my life, not
just my family, but groups and bands and artists that
(06:55):
I mentor or just people along the way that I
meet in life, if I can um prevent them from
having some of those low lows. Uh, that's very very
motivating for me in life. So that was eleven questions
and now we're going to get right into some of
your phone calls. Hi Meggan, are you there? Hi? Hi?
(07:23):
How are you? I'm good? How are you? Wow? Such
a clear, clean sound coming from your computer. Oh, thank you,
I am using my earbuds. Oh nice, nice, Nice to
meet you too. So do you have a question for
me or anything you want to talk about. I do
have a question for you. Okay, here's the deal. A
(07:45):
guy asked me on a date, and then on the
day of the day, I didn't hear from him. So
I reached out to him like two hours before to
make sure we were on and he bales and says
he has to go to his friend's mother's birthday dinner.
So that seems kind of like a cop out. But whatever,
indeed does seem like a cop out, I don't think that,
(08:06):
you know, I think that obviously you want to follow
up to make sure that the data is still on
and all that good stuff, and and sometimes that kind
of stuff can be awkward. But the fact that he
canceled if it was a different excuse, for example, if
he had kids or it was his own mother, but
it was his friend's mother's birthday, and you know, and
you reached out to him two hours beforehand instead of
(08:27):
him reaching out to you to kind of let him know,
it sounds like he bailed time to move on. Okay,
But see, now here's my follow up though, he just
asked me out on another day, So like, do I
give him another try or am I? Like? Nah? I
think maybe a conversation would be had about why he canceled.
(08:47):
Kind of feel out the vibe on the phone, right yeah,
time call, which you can really kind of tell cues
with people's visuals right lying in the queues there, um,
with the spatial expressions and all that, and maybe saying hey,
I totally forgot, I'm so sorry. I want to make
it up to you, or he says, well, uh, and
(09:10):
he if he does that, obviously a second date, well,
a first second date isn't an effect. I don't think. Okay,
I think that's a good plan. I like that. Thank you.
I'm not a relationship expert, but you know, no, but
that's helpful because I just couldn't even tell, like I
was like, I don't even know how to I don't
know how to perceive with this, like what's your deal?
So that's great. You got to feel the vibe out
(09:32):
on all this stuff for sure. Thank you. Bye bye,
Hey Simona, how are you? I'm good? How are you?
I'm good. I'm enjoying this. Uh, this Q and A
that I'm doing with people that are calling it about
relationship advice. The worst guy in the planet to give advice,
but I'll do my best. What kind of questions do
(09:52):
you have for me today. Well, okay, so my question is,
I'm so, I'm a divorced mom of two kids and
dating kind of sucks right now. Um, I'll have a
great date, and then as soon as my date hears
about my kids, it doesn't go further. Um. So my
question is how far into dating someone should I bring
(10:14):
up my kids? Is there a way to do that
that won't scare them off? Well? Look, I mean anybody
that you want to be with long term, it depends
on whether you're looking for a long term relationship or
you just out there looking to have fun. Right. If
you're out there looking to have fun, you can mention
them later, mention your kids later on in your dating process.
But I think if you're serious about settling down with somebody,
(10:35):
finding the one, I think you got to mention your
kids right away. I mean, with with me, I always
talked about my kids right away, and if that was
an issue, then that was an automatical, automatic X out
for for me. With uh with that, because you know,
obviously my children are the most important thing to me
in my entire life. So if someone is kind of,
you know, getting scared or afraid of you because you
(10:58):
have kids, I mean I say run for the hills.
But like I said in the beginning of the conversation,
if you're just going to have fun and it's not
going to be a long term thing, then it might
not necessarily be a topic of conversation. Okay, all right,
thank you, thanks Semona. Hi, Kate, how are you? Hey? Good?
(11:18):
How are you nice? To be connected with you over
zoom you too, It's really nice to connect. Um. I
guess I could use some advice. Okay, Well, I'll do
my best to give you some advice. I'm not I'm
not I'm not a doctor and expert, but I'll try
my best from life experience to help you out. Okay, Um, well,
(11:39):
here's my scenario. I went on a date, a first
date with a guy the other day. I met him
on just like a dating app and it was a
it was a great date. But he drank a lot
about the date, like a lot, A lot, And what's
a lot coming from a drinker? A lot to mean,
(12:01):
you know, how much? Was a lot? He had two
drinks before the appetizer got there, three before dinner was over,
and two more before the check came, so like seven
drinks and I had to the whole time, so we're
under twelve. No, did he was he? Was he drinking
(12:23):
it like he was needed to drink the booze to
get through the night. Or was he drinking because he
was trying to be social? How was his behavior as
he drank? I mean, there's so many lays I need
to know about this fellow drinking guy that I need to.
I don't want to. I don't want to disparage the
guy or or kind of lead you in the wrong direction.
(12:44):
If he's a nice guy, maybe he was nervous. You
know a lot of times us guys are nervous around
beautiful women like yourself, and you know, afraid that especially
if he's been on the dating scene for a while,
maybe not had that much success like most people don't
um And so that was a way for him to
calm his nerves. But if he's drinking, is almost he
(13:04):
has a problem, and the guy's getting sloppy and he's
fallen all over the place. I mean that's probably self explanatory, right, yeah.
I mean that's the thing that he wasn't mesty, he
wasn't slurring, He was totally fine, Like he needed it
to like self regulate his his nerves or something because
he wasn't drunk, which is also amazing, Like, what kind
of metabolism does he have that he can drink that
(13:26):
much and be fine. He's a pro. Where's this guy lit?
Because that's what what Midwestern people like myself, Dude, there's
nothing to do except for drink um and and talk
about sports. But no, look, I mean, certainly that's a
lot of drinks to having at night. And if he
was getting sloppy, or he was embarrassing himself or you
in the process, you know, obviously you know, there's probably
(13:48):
not a call for a second date there. But if
the guy was just getting through the night and it
was your first was at your first date with the guy, Yes,
it was our first time meeting. I'm pretty laxed with
that stuff. I'd say give the guy a pass, give
him a second date. If the guy is sitting on
a Tuesday afternoon and he doesn't have a job and
he's smashing you know, bush leg draft or you know,
(14:13):
or or bottle jack, I would start to get worried then,
but I think, you know, maybe give him a second
shot and see if he kind of slows it down
the second time around. Or maybe that's just part of
the guy's personality. But you know, it's something to watch,
but not something to be concerned with on the first date.
Just my opinion. Okay, cool, I'll take that and I'll
(14:36):
definitely give him another shot. And you know, I don't know,
maybe I'll call and give you an update again. I
would love it. Right now. I need to know, so
send me a note. I want to find out how
it goes. Alrighty, we'll do Thank you so much. I
appreciate it. Appreciate it alright, by bye bye. Hi, Susan,
how are you? Hi? I'm great, how are you. I'm
(14:58):
doing great. I'm having a lot of fun on with this,
uh this podcast. It's pretty cool, wonderful. So, um, I'm
dating this guy who he's a great guy. He has
two kids and I have three kids, and we're getting
pretty serious and I'm thinking it's time that the kids
(15:20):
met each other. So I'm just wondering, you know, like
what's a good way to introduce them and is there
anything I need to be careful of to ensure it
goes well? Like I'm just I'm a little nervous about
the whole thing, you know, because so far it's been
me and him. It sounds like a great question. And
and look, I've been through this, so I can speak
to what what worked for me doesn't necessarily mean it
(15:42):
works for everybody. Um, but I actually, have you ever
seen how First of all, how long have you been
dating this guy? Like seven and a half months? That's
a long time. I mean that's a that's a pretty
lengthy amount of time. And it probably is time that you,
you know, sort of see how the family members would
interact in there if you're getting started to get pretty
serious about it. Um, you know, I think that with
(16:04):
regards to you know, watching somebody other how the other
person parents? Have you parents their kids? Have you been
able to take a look at how he is with
his kids? Um? Yeah, I mean I haven't, like I
haven't had a lot of time with them either, you know. Um,
(16:26):
but he seems like, you know, they seem to kid
around kind of and like they have a nice They
seem pretty close. Does he talk with affinity for his kids?
Is that like a lot of the topic of conversation.
I know a lot of people, you know, are are
scared and shy away from talking about their kids because
they're afraid that this person that they're gonna date doesn't
(16:46):
like that. But in this case, he's got kids of
his own, does he does he speak affectionately about his
own kids? Oh yeah, oh yeah, definitely. Well look, I
think that's a start, and um, you know, I think
that with me. I saw my wife with her kids,
and I was like, Okay, she's a good mom. She
takes care of her kids, she handles her business, she
(17:08):
disciplines them the right way, they have respect for her,
they're well put together. So that after I saw that,
I thought it would be a good time to introduce
her to my kids, which was, you know, kind of
a difficult thing because I didn't have the easiest of
of divorce process of the divorce process going on, so
it was I was always very nervous about introducing um
(17:31):
my kids to other people, which I didn't forever until
I met my wife and felt comfortable about how she
was with her kids, and they ended up getting along famously.
I mean, uh, And what I was. I travel a lot,
So I was in a certain city that was close
to them, and and her kids were close to to us,
and really we were just out and about and we
(17:51):
went and did an event and took him to a
hotel and they all kind of had a good time,
went swimming and all that stuff. And then you know
that the rest after that was always positive. So they
all got along. You know, they fought a little bit
like any uh, you know family would do. But um,
you know it, are any of them still in the
(18:12):
house or three of them are gone? Three of them
are off to school and doing other things and graduated,
you know, and then we have two left here. So
my my youngest stepson just turned sixteen yesterday. He's still
here and now he's driving and it's gone to buy
in a flash. I've known him since he's three years old.
And then um uh, my daughter's ten. So those are
(18:34):
the only two that are left. And then the other
ones are are all growing up now one and almost
twenty one. So it's been a fun ride. That's so great.
So do you have any suggestions on like like a
things like what kind of setting should we be in?
Do you think for the kids to meet each other?
(18:54):
I think it might be cool, you know what, just
do something fun where they can have fun together, like, uh,
take him to Wet and Wild or go to like
a theme park or something like that that's a good
way kids ice. They can hang out with each other,
they can go run around and and do fun stuff
together and you know, like kids would do if as
if they're meeting friends right as opposed to like some
(19:14):
formal dinner we're like you're sitting across from Yeah, yeah,
I know sister or you know step sisters. So I
think in a fun environment is always a really really
cool way for for young people to break the ice. Okay,
that's a good idea. I'm thinking maybe even mini golf
or something like that. Do people's don't great? Yeah, something
like that bowling mini golf like you know, yeah, I
(19:38):
don't know where you live, but like a small theme
park Disney Went and Wild. Their kids always love to
go to the water parks together, that kind of stuff,
don't car Okay, yeah, no, I think that's a good idea,
good idea. Well, thanks you. I appreciate it, of course,
thank you so much, because, um now you've given me
some um you know, now at least I have some ideas.
(19:58):
Like I before, I was just like I have no,
I can't even I don't know. I've just been nervous,
you know, Yeah, I completely relate and understand. And UM,
I got your email from the producers, so I'll send
you the bill. It's only gonna be a hundred for
this short call. I'm just just playing anyhow. Nice to
talk to you and good luck with all that. Thank
(20:20):
you so much, Thank you. Bye. Hi, it's up late.
Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. How are
you today? Oh? I'm good? Are you? I'm doing great? Um?
So um, thank you so much for taking my call. Um.
I'm so. I'm thirty six. My boyfriend is twenty six. Um,
(20:43):
we've been together for a while. Um. Anyways, we've been
talking a lot about having kids lately and uh. Um,
so I've kids have always been part of my plan
and I feel like my biological clock is ticketing. Um,
and so I really want to get married and start
(21:04):
trying for kids. But when we started talking about it,
he thinks that kids are like four years away for
him at least. But I'm worried that four years might
be too late for me. Should I Should I stay
in this and be patient with him? Or like, should
I try and find someone who's more like in the
line with my timeline? Wow, what a tricky question where
(21:28):
I'd hate to give you the wrong advice on this one.
But how long? First of all, there's some important factors.
You said you've been a long together for a long time.
How long is a long long time? Um? Well it's
been like, well, a long time for me is three years.
The three years He was twenty three and you were
thirty three at the time. Yeah, so three years. It's
kind of a long time. And when you first started dating,
(21:49):
was this any part of the discussion at all that
you would like to have kids? And obviously he knows
you're just a little bit older than him. Um, I'm
sure it's in the back of his mind that you
would probably want to have kids at some point. Um,
did that ever come up in the beginning or all
of a sudden, Did you just spring it on him
that you know what, I think it's time for us
to have kids. Yeah. No, we definitely have had those
(22:09):
conversations since the beginning. It was you know, I would
not have gotten with him in the first place if
he hadn't been someone who have said that he wanted kids. Uh,
it's just that, Um, now I'm realizing, Oh no, this
like age gap, uh might actually be a problem. Well,
this is something you often hear. I mean, look, I
mean there are a couple of different other factors. Does
(22:31):
his career prevent him from being able to put the
time in it that's necessary to be a father. Is
there anything going on with regards to his his professional
life that would prevent him. Does he travel a lot?
Or is he a baseball player or rock star? I mean,
is there something that that keeps this man, keeps him
on the road all the time that he wouldn't be
(22:51):
able to put the time and necessary to be a
good dad. Uh No, No, he works a pretty standard
like nine to six job um in finance. Like he's
very you know, he's he's got his stuff together. Everything is,
everything's in a good place. I think he just feels like,
you know, he's not really you know, he wants to
(23:13):
do traveling and stuff like that, and you know he
feels like there's just a lot that he still wants
to do before having kids. Well, look, I mean there
there are a couple of things. One he has to
respect that you know, you you're having anxiety about your
biological clock. Although that as we know now, there are
things you can do with regards to science that enable
(23:35):
you to carry children and bear them a lot older
than you used to be able to do back in
the day that's available, but he also has to respect
your desire to to do this in a in a
in a natural way. And and so I think, you know,
three years just my opinion, and all of a sudden,
this relationships and I get I get like a d
(23:55):
M on Instagram from this guy who is mad at
me because you broke up with them. Um, no, I
I think that probably time you have that talk with
him and say, hey, look, we've been together three years.
I've invested this time into you. You know me well
enough that this is kind of something that I really
see on the horizon and want to do before I
feel like it's too late or I have to go
(24:15):
through obstacles to make it more difficult for me to
have kids. And I think it's it's definitely worth the conversation. Yeah, yeah,
I'm I guess I'm worried that you know, if I
if for some reason I break up with him, like
that's a no go, then you know, well I just
ruin my chances at all. But I guess we'll we'll
find out. Well, I mean, look, you don't have to
(24:36):
break up with them. But you know, maybe feel it,
feel it out, because sometimes guys will prolong the you know,
they'll they'll just kind of there. There might never be
a time, you know what I mean that they'll say
he wants to have kids and he just enjoys dating you,
which is perfectly fine. But if you have different life
goals for yourself and and and the way you envision
you know, being a mother, and that's not going to
(24:57):
play into his plans, and then maybe it is good
good to cut it short. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, cool, Well,
thank you so much, Thank you appreciated, Bhie, thank you
made to you. Holdine is the and busy man. Oh
(25:23):
I'm so sorry. Let me let me turn that down.
The problem by all means, please play our music at
all times in your house. That's awesome. I had to
go back and it brought back so many memories. I mean,
ninety degrees in rising, it's a classic. I'm loving the
backdrop with the co posters back there, the Moman ruge,
what is that? The aviator? Gladiator? Oh gladiator? Nice, very nice.
(25:47):
Thanks for taking the time to join me today. Of course.
Oh here's my cat right on time. She loves boys
to her name is Pixy. Yes, what a cool name. Hey, Okay,
you can go, let me talk to Jeff. Um, I'm
so excited to me You've been such a huge fan
for a long time. Thank you. I'm totally flattered and
(26:09):
excited to meet you too. I really appreciate it. Yeah,
of course. Um. So I'm just gonna jump in with
my question. Um, So, it seems like, you know, back
in the day, there was like rivalries among the groups, right,
but recently, you know, we see guys from different groups
doing things together, right, like the boy Man Christmas specialty
you were in last year. So aside from maybe just
(26:31):
being like a little bit older and wiser, what do
you what do you think has changed to sort of
encourage those kind of collaborations. Well, here's what's really interesting, Donna,
because we never really had a rivalry with the other
other quote unquote boy bands. I know, it's it's contrary
to popular belief and it's not a it's not a
great hot button for the media, but we really really
(26:53):
had a ton of respect for both the Backstreet Boys
groups we were compared to Backstreet Boys and instinct although
we were un formulated a little bit differently and that
we put ourselves together and considered ourselves a vocal group.
Certainly years later, we're thrilled and honored to be mentioned
in the same company with those guys and you know,
experience in the same sort of journey, the high highs
(27:15):
and low lows that those guys that we had nothing
but respect for them, they had tons of hits, tons
of talent, and we're just great guys to be around
on the road. I mean, like you had mentioned there,
there was the boy band Christmas Special, there was this
thing called back Sync. They had this thing here in
Vegas called the After Party. I'm part of a company,
a group called A T C K with A J
(27:36):
and christ you know. Um, so you know, I I
have an affinity and love and appreciation for those guys,
their journey, their work ethic and just what what type
of great people they are. You know, haven't been in
the business now for twenty seven years, it's anniversary. You know,
you don't really come across people that are really true
and genuine and and great folks to be around. And
(27:59):
to be honest, it sounds like I can't answer, but
those guys are all fantastic dudes. Okay, And because I
just saw Backstreet in Vegas two weeks ago, and now
I have to ask when are we going to see nine? Well, look, yeah,
as I mentioned, it's our twenty fifth anniversary. Thanks for
asking the question. Um, we're thrilled and excited that so
many people are coming out to see us. I mean
we've we've been you know, back since two thousand and
(28:21):
thirteen when we toured with Boys the Men and New Kids,
and since then, I've had multiple tours. The fans are
always there for us. We're gonna be recording some stuff
last week of I want to say May, uh, first
week of May, we're recording some new material, and then
we're gonna be back on the road end of August,
probably into September, and then go through the holiday season.
I don't know that we'll probably do a holiday tour
(28:42):
like we've done in the past, but we will definitely
be on the road, you know, going out there and
uh hitting the pavement, doing some shows for our fans.
Were super excited about it. That's awesome. I'm super excited.
And I just have to say this gift is one
of my favorite Christmas songs. Thank you. I mean you
look the Christmas album I'm proud of all the material
and feel blessed and fortunate and lucky to be a
(29:03):
part of any of it. But I think that the
Christmas music for us, because we're a true court quartet.
I think the fact that we can, you know, arrange
all the harmonies and the vocal stacks that we like
to do. We I feel like the Christmas music is
our best stuff. So I appreciate the compliment. Every year
I have to listen to it, I find it and
I'm like, Okay, I love this song and totally superficially
(29:25):
you're a tiny box, but you look fabulous. I thank you,
very appreciate. I'm trying to keep up with the young bucks.
You know, I'm about to turn forty nine here in
a few days, so I'm trying to try to stay
young and vibrants so we can, uh, we can still
compete in our old age are anti created souls. I'm
right behind you, so don't say old age, please you.
(29:49):
And uh, I appreciate your time down and and asking
me such great questions and the compliments to yeah, no problem.
It's so great to me, you know, I'm I'm so
happy to do it. Thank you, Okay, Hey, how are
you good. How are you I'm doing I'm doing great. Thanks,
Thanks a lot for hopping on with me. Yeah. So,
(30:10):
being in the industry so long, we're all curious to
know what is the one song you wish she never
had to sing? Ever again, that's a good one. You know.
I hate to sound like a corny person, but I
love all the songs I mean, you know, especially the
ones that were hits that you know, people say, oh
my gosh, I'm so sick of singing I Do or
(30:32):
Invisible Man or Hardest Thing or whatever the hit is
or song that we've done. Um, it's actually the opposite.
I used to not like singing some of the songs
that we recorded back in the day in concert, like
Dizzy or the Way You Want Me To, because I
wanted to sing all the love songs and ballads. But
now many years later, those are tempo dance songs. Yeah,
(30:55):
I think that they seem relevant now. So it's the opposite.
I actually like singing more songs then the ones I
don't like. I mean, you know, I wish I had
a different answer and said, oh man, I hate singing
because of you, but I get it. Joked out of
it out of it every time because the crowd responds
differently every time. And you know, look at this point
(31:15):
you mentioned many years, many years later, for anybody to
know any of the lyrics to any of our songs
and back to us. I'm thrilled. That's awesome. My first
concert was actually one of the All That tours of
ninety eight degrees, so I'll never forget. Well, thanks, We're
we're part of the world. Are you in? Where was
that at UM in southern California? It was like before
they tore down the Universal Amphitheater. Yeah, that's right, So
(31:38):
that was And so you got Monica and the Keenan
and kel and n that's fun. Well, I appreciate that. Geez,
that's awesome. Thank you. Yeah, so glad you guys have
all success witching many years ahead. Thank you guys for
having such great anthems. Oh, I appreciate it, and I
love the love. And thanks Joyce. I appreciate they appreciate
(32:00):
the support seriously, Thanks Joyce, what great calls. We're gonna
take a little break and we're gonna get right into
the Q and A. So the question, the first question
is how did I meet my beautiful wife, Amanda. It
(32:23):
was very interesting. So a friend of mine, Jordan's Knights,
who is a member of New Kids on the Block.
He and I had been touring for a couple of
years together as solo artists and having a lot of fun,
and he asked me to be a part of this
thing that he had called he was doing called Jordan's Idol,
and jordan Idol was essentially a basically a version of
his version of American Idol would where fans would come
out and they would sing covers and then a winner
(32:45):
of the contest would get to record with Jordan's and
Jordan wanted me to be a judge. Well, I was
really busy with my kids. I was going through going
through a divorce and only had limited amounts of times
time to spend with my kids. And at that time
I was like, look, I get I have visitation with
my kids. I can't make it. So Jordan was like, look,
you have to be here, please bro do it. So
(33:06):
I drove to l a um from Orange County and
and um, you know, reluctantly went and uh and then
judge this contest and my wife was there, my future
wife was there at a v I P table, and
I thought I was gonna be really, really cool, and
I sauntered up to her like she was gonna know
who I was, and said, hey, you must be one
(33:28):
of Jordan's younger fans. And she was like, no, I'm
in my thirties. You know you're by the way, you're
sitting at my table, and she kind of dismissed me,
which I was kind of like taking her back, and
it was definitely a bruise to my ego. But I
was like, hey, you know, what's your name? And she
told me her name was Amanda, and she really kind
of ignored me, and then her friend said, don't you
know who this guy is. It's a guy from ninety degrees.
(33:48):
So her exact words were, what do you want a cookie?
So I was like, I walked my butt back to
my own judgment judge chair and spent the rest of
the night doing the doing the thing in the contest
and all that. But on my way out she denies this,
but she followed me. On my way out, I was
going home to be with my kids and do their
(34:09):
homework with them, and she said, hey, where are you going.
I said, well, I gotta go home and be with
my kids. And by the way, you didn't know who
I was earlier. And then um, we didn't exchange numbers
at the time, but we exchanged Twitter handles, and so
I immediately d M her and was trying to chat
her up, and I slid into the d M s
and all that stuff. And then eventually I just started
(34:29):
seeing her uh now and again on the road. It
wasn't anything seriously I was taking seriously. I never really
wanted to get married again. I was kind of disenchanted,
disenchanted with relationships. But she was sweet, She really had
her stuff together. She was a good mom, she was impressive,
she didn't rely on me to do everything for her,
(34:50):
and she was just there for me at a very
rough time in my life. So um ended up being
a blessing in disguise that I went to the jordanal
event and she changed my life. The other question is
how did I know I was ready to marry? Well,
you know, look, I again, I didn't think I was
ever going to get married again. I obviously I love
(35:12):
women and and dating is okay, and and you know,
sort of wanted to focus on being a father. But
this person came into my life and completely changed it
around for the better, almost effective immediately. And you know,
I sat there and it kind of was like a
revelation to me. I was visiting her in uh in
l A. She was doing something, she was in the
(35:34):
medical field, doing something, and I visited her at a
restaurant at her hotel, and I thought, wow, you know, um,
this one might be the one. I remember, you know,
going home after hanging out with her and telling my parents, Man,
I think this is gonna be the person that I
end up you know, having a long term relationship with.
And you know, eventually, very shortly thereafter, Um, we got married.
(35:57):
We kind of just fell in love with each other
and life got better with with both of us in
each other's lives, and um, the rest is history totally
changed my life around, all right. So the question is
do men have a one track mind? Can they listen
to women when they're also doing something else? Now, this
is something you want to talk about pet peeves. We
talked about pet peeves earlier, um, and one of the
(36:20):
questions was my pet peeve, mine's lazy people? Well, probably
my wife Amanda's pet peeve is the fact that I
cannot do more than one thing at a time. If
I'm crafting an email in my phone, I am literally
hearing the words as I'm typing them, and she could
be saying, well, you need to take the trash out
or the pool guys gonna come, and I cannot hear
(36:41):
anything else. So one track mind, it's kind of a rough,
rough sort of term for that. I would say focus.
I would say I'm focused on one thing, and I
don't speak for all men. There are other guys that multitasks,
can talk texts and you know, do all kinds of things.
I have to be focused on whatever it is, and
(37:02):
it doesn't necessarily have to do with being a man.
It could be that I have like a d D
and I have to like focus on that because if
I start to focus on a bunch of other things
that I can't pay attention. But in this case, I
would say most men do have a one track mine.
It's been wonderful spending time with you, great calls, great
Q and A. I loved, you know, spending some time
(37:24):
with everybody, and love the fact that twenty five years later,
degree still has fans out there, and it's been a
pleasure and honor for me to spend so much time
with you, you probably learned a little bit too much.
But one last thing I want to talk about is
nine Degrees is gonna be on the road recording some
new music. I have a new song out right now
called Lit featuring Pompeii, debut number one on the iTunes
(37:47):
Dance chart. I'm very, very proud of it. It's been
a blast hanging out here on How Men Think. Thanks
for having me, We'll see you soon. This is How
Men Think and I Heart Radio London Audio Production. Listen
each Thursday on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcast or
wherever you get your podcasts.
We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This
is how Men Thick and I heard radio podcast. Hey,
what's going on everybody. I'm Jeff Timmins and you may
know me from the boyband Degrees. I'm so happy and
thrilled to be guest hosting How Men Think. I'm gonna
answer all your questions and try to help you understand
how Men Think. But first, this is eleven Questions with
(00:23):
Jeff Timmins. So let's get into it. What are you
known for? Well? Uh, mostly known for being a member
of ninety eight Degrees, which has been an amazing run
for me. It's our twenty fifth year. Uh this year
Degrees being in existence. Although it makes me feel really old,
I feel very blessed and fortunate to get out there
and still be performing for such wonderful fans and be
(00:44):
doing this for a living and supporting my family. So
I think all of you a little bit about me.
I love music, of course, that's the obvious thing. I'm
a big family man. I've got five kids, They're all amazing.
I've been very blessed, got a beautiful wife, and you
know I like to work behind the scenes as well.
I'm a big studio guy. Um like to do music
and produce stuff for other people, I mean the tech space.
(01:06):
It's like to keep busy. So who am I in
my personal life? I'm just a guy that likes the
screw around. I don't take myself too seriously at all.
I take other people seriously. But I like to have
a lot of fun, roll with the flow, make people laugh,
and you know, enjoy family and friends and you know,
the little things in life are are very very important
to me. All right. What are three shows that I'm
(01:28):
binge watching. Well, there's a show called Elite. There's a
lot of these Spanish shows that are translated to English
on Netflix that I really love. Elite is one of them.
Money Heisten is another one. And then I've really been
kind of getting my guilty pleasure from the Pam and
Tommy story on Hulu, which I absolutely love. What is
my favorite food? Well, it's kind of a toss up.
(01:50):
I'm a low carb guy, so it's usually meat and
cheese and seafood and things like that. I would have
to say steak and lobster. I'm you know, I like
the finer things in life, so I'd say steaks, steak,
steak and lobster my favorite foods. Tell us about your career, Well,
I have been totally blessed. Uh, it's been a wonderful ride.
(02:13):
I'm from a very small town in Ohio where you know,
a lot of not a lot of people kind of
venture off into the entertainment business. UM. I was inspired
by the group Boys Two Men and wanted to create
a similar group just like that. Um, we didn't have
the Internet and uh things that like like like um,
Twitter and Snapchat and YouTube at our disposal and TikTok,
(02:36):
so you literally had to go pursue your dreams. I
drove with my original band across the country to l
a Um to pursue the dream and got lucky. You know.
We ended up singing backstage at a Boys de Men
concert ironically, and we're fortunate enough to get signed and
we got signed to Motown Records, which is a legendary label. UM,
(02:57):
like Boys Demand Did. We toured the world, we sold
millions and millions of records and we're still around twenty
five years later with great fans that embrace our music
and we enjoy the camaraderie of our brotherhood of getting
up on stage and acting silly and singing songs for
our living. So it's been a blessing. We've got to
perform with Stevie Wonder on a song for Disney's Mulan
(03:20):
with Mariah Carey that went and Joe that a song
that went number one. We got to perform for Michael
Jackson with Usher and Luther Vandrow's anything you can imagine.
We've been fortunate enough to do and and we never
took different granted. So it's been an amazing ride. What's
my biggest fear in life? I think just not being successful.
I mean I think that, uh you know, it's important
(03:42):
for me to always get better every day. Uh, never
settled for mediocrity. I don't expect that of everybody else
that I meet in my life, particularly my beautiful wife
and my kids. But for me, it's always achieving something
new and it doesn't necessarily have to do with monetization
and making money or being famous. It's just getting better
every day. So my fear is to become relaxed and
(04:04):
not be a success or not really have the influence
and impact that I hope to do to encourage others
to pursue their dreams. So the fear of failure is
probably my biggest driver, ah, my biggest pet peeve. On
that note, I despise people that are lazy. I like
people that like to kick back and take it easy,
(04:25):
but laziness drives me absolutely crazy. Absolutely my pet peete laziness.
What makes me most happy seeing smiling faces in my family.
I mean, I think it's really really important. Um. The
world is always, uh, you know, a challenging place to
live in and life is hard, so you know, the
small victories for me or when I see smiling faces
(04:47):
on all of my kids, I see happy faces, and
you know, when my wife's happy, that's always nice. My
ideal Saturday morning, well, you know, Saturday, the day is
kind of blur together. I travel a lot. I'm very
fortunate to do, and um, so Saturdays could be a Sunday,
it could be a Monday. I'm always working, which is
a really very fortunate thing for myself. Um, but you know,
(05:09):
if if you're talking about the weekend, a Saturday morning
would be watching college football. I know that's a boring answer,
but I'm a big sports fan and being from a
small town in Ohio that revolves around football, Massillon, Ohio, Um,
I love watching my college football and I'm just hanging
out with my kids on a Saturday if I'm in
town and if we're all together. But traditionally I'm I'm
(05:30):
watching college football, either with the guys in ninety eight
degrees or even by myself. But that's a that's a
typical Saturday for me. Am, I'm more of an athlete
or our share quarterback. Um, well, I'd like to think.
I'd like to think of an athlete. I but you
know what, I'm just I'm coming to terms with the
fact that I'm not that good of an athlete, so
(05:51):
I'm sort of both. I try to keep in shape.
I wanted to play football collegiately, and of course in
the NFL where I'm from, it's all about that. And
unfortunately I was vertically challenged. I didn't have enough skills,
wasn't good. I mean, the list goes on and on.
But I would say now I've I've come to terms
with the fact that I'm an arm chair quarterback. I
(06:13):
watched you criticize the coaches and throw stuff at the
TV and say they should have any better choices and
all that stuff. But at the end of the day,
I'm just a fan like everybody else. What keeps you motivated? Um? Well,
I have a lot of self motivation. UM. I think
you know, striving to be successful is an important thing
(06:34):
for me, and to get better every day. Like I mentioned, Um,
but my family does you know? I want to be
able to provide for them so they don't have to struggle.
I've been very fortunate, but you know, along the ways
there are high highs and low lows in the entertainment industry.
And if I can prevent anybody in my life, not
just my family, but groups and bands and artists that
(06:55):
I mentor or just people along the way that I
meet in life, if I can um prevent them from
having some of those low lows. Uh, that's very very
motivating for me in life. So that was eleven questions
and now we're going to get right into some of
your phone calls. Hi Meggan, are you there? Hi? Hi?
(07:23):
How are you? I'm good? How are you? Wow? Such
a clear, clean sound coming from your computer. Oh, thank you,
I am using my earbuds. Oh nice, nice, Nice to
meet you too. So do you have a question for
me or anything you want to talk about. I do
have a question for you. Okay, here's the deal. A
(07:45):
guy asked me on a date, and then on the
day of the day, I didn't hear from him. So
I reached out to him like two hours before to
make sure we were on and he bales and says
he has to go to his friend's mother's birthday dinner.
So that seems kind of like a cop out. But whatever,
indeed does seem like a cop out, I don't think that,
(08:06):
you know, I think that obviously you want to follow
up to make sure that the data is still on
and all that good stuff, and and sometimes that kind
of stuff can be awkward. But the fact that he
canceled if it was a different excuse, for example, if
he had kids or it was his own mother, but
it was his friend's mother's birthday, and you know, and
you reached out to him two hours beforehand instead of
(08:27):
him reaching out to you to kind of let him know,
it sounds like he bailed time to move on. Okay,
But see, now here's my follow up though, he just
asked me out on another day, So like, do I
give him another try or am I? Like? Nah? I
think maybe a conversation would be had about why he canceled.
(08:47):
Kind of feel out the vibe on the phone, right yeah,
time call, which you can really kind of tell cues
with people's visuals right lying in the queues there, um,
with the spatial expressions and all that, and maybe saying hey,
I totally forgot, I'm so sorry. I want to make
it up to you, or he says, well, uh, and
(09:10):
he if he does that, obviously a second date, well,
a first second date isn't an effect. I don't think. Okay,
I think that's a good plan. I like that. Thank you.
I'm not a relationship expert, but you know, no, but
that's helpful because I just couldn't even tell, like I
was like, I don't even know how to I don't
know how to perceive with this, like what's your deal?
So that's great. You got to feel the vibe out
(09:32):
on all this stuff for sure. Thank you. Bye bye,
Hey Simona, how are you? I'm good? How are you?
I'm good. I'm enjoying this. Uh, this Q and A
that I'm doing with people that are calling it about
relationship advice. The worst guy in the planet to give advice,
but I'll do my best. What kind of questions do
(09:52):
you have for me today. Well, okay, so my question is,
I'm so, I'm a divorced mom of two kids and
dating kind of sucks right now. Um, I'll have a
great date, and then as soon as my date hears
about my kids, it doesn't go further. Um. So my
question is how far into dating someone should I bring
(10:14):
up my kids? Is there a way to do that
that won't scare them off? Well? Look, I mean anybody
that you want to be with long term, it depends
on whether you're looking for a long term relationship or
you just out there looking to have fun. Right. If
you're out there looking to have fun, you can mention
them later, mention your kids later on in your dating process.
But I think if you're serious about settling down with somebody,
(10:35):
finding the one, I think you got to mention your
kids right away. I mean, with with me, I always
talked about my kids right away, and if that was
an issue, then that was an automatical, automatic X out
for for me. With uh with that, because you know,
obviously my children are the most important thing to me
in my entire life. So if someone is kind of,
you know, getting scared or afraid of you because you
(10:58):
have kids, I mean I say run for the hills.
But like I said in the beginning of the conversation,
if you're just going to have fun and it's not
going to be a long term thing, then it might
not necessarily be a topic of conversation. Okay, all right,
thank you, thanks Semona. Hi, Kate, how are you? Hey? Good?
(11:18):
How are you nice? To be connected with you over
zoom you too, It's really nice to connect. Um. I
guess I could use some advice. Okay, Well, I'll do
my best to give you some advice. I'm not I'm
not I'm not a doctor and expert, but I'll try
my best from life experience to help you out. Okay, Um, well,
(11:39):
here's my scenario. I went on a date, a first
date with a guy the other day. I met him
on just like a dating app and it was a
it was a great date. But he drank a lot
about the date, like a lot, A lot, And what's
a lot coming from a drinker? A lot to mean,
(12:01):
you know, how much? Was a lot? He had two
drinks before the appetizer got there, three before dinner was over,
and two more before the check came, so like seven
drinks and I had to the whole time, so we're
under twelve. No, did he was he? Was he drinking
(12:23):
it like he was needed to drink the booze to
get through the night. Or was he drinking because he
was trying to be social? How was his behavior as
he drank? I mean, there's so many lays I need
to know about this fellow drinking guy that I need to.
I don't want to. I don't want to disparage the
guy or or kind of lead you in the wrong direction.
(12:44):
If he's a nice guy, maybe he was nervous. You
know a lot of times us guys are nervous around
beautiful women like yourself, and you know, afraid that especially
if he's been on the dating scene for a while,
maybe not had that much success like most people don't
um And so that was a way for him to
calm his nerves. But if he's drinking, is almost he
(13:04):
has a problem, and the guy's getting sloppy and he's
fallen all over the place. I mean that's probably self explanatory, right, yeah.
I mean that's the thing that he wasn't mesty, he
wasn't slurring, He was totally fine, Like he needed it
to like self regulate his his nerves or something because
he wasn't drunk, which is also amazing, Like, what kind
of metabolism does he have that he can drink that
(13:26):
much and be fine. He's a pro. Where's this guy lit?
Because that's what what Midwestern people like myself, Dude, there's
nothing to do except for drink um and and talk
about sports. But no, look, I mean, certainly that's a
lot of drinks to having at night. And if he
was getting sloppy, or he was embarrassing himself or you
in the process, you know, obviously you know, there's probably
(13:48):
not a call for a second date there. But if
the guy was just getting through the night and it
was your first was at your first date with the guy, Yes,
it was our first time meeting. I'm pretty laxed with
that stuff. I'd say give the guy a pass, give
him a second date. If the guy is sitting on
a Tuesday afternoon and he doesn't have a job and
he's smashing you know, bush leg draft or you know,
(14:13):
or or bottle jack, I would start to get worried then,
but I think, you know, maybe give him a second
shot and see if he kind of slows it down
the second time around. Or maybe that's just part of
the guy's personality. But you know, it's something to watch,
but not something to be concerned with on the first date.
Just my opinion. Okay, cool, I'll take that and I'll
(14:36):
definitely give him another shot. And you know, I don't know,
maybe I'll call and give you an update again. I
would love it. Right now. I need to know, so
send me a note. I want to find out how
it goes. Alrighty, we'll do Thank you so much. I
appreciate it. Appreciate it alright, by bye bye. Hi, Susan,
how are you? Hi? I'm great, how are you. I'm
(14:58):
doing great. I'm having a lot of fun on with this,
uh this podcast. It's pretty cool, wonderful. So, um, I'm
dating this guy who he's a great guy. He has
two kids and I have three kids, and we're getting
pretty serious and I'm thinking it's time that the kids
(15:20):
met each other. So I'm just wondering, you know, like
what's a good way to introduce them and is there
anything I need to be careful of to ensure it
goes well? Like I'm just I'm a little nervous about
the whole thing, you know, because so far it's been
me and him. It sounds like a great question. And
and look, I've been through this, so I can speak
to what what worked for me doesn't necessarily mean it
(15:42):
works for everybody. Um, but I actually, have you ever
seen how First of all, how long have you been
dating this guy? Like seven and a half months? That's
a long time. I mean that's a that's a pretty
lengthy amount of time. And it probably is time that you,
you know, sort of see how the family members would
interact in there if you're getting started to get pretty
serious about it. Um, you know, I think that with
(16:04):
regards to you know, watching somebody other how the other
person parents? Have you parents their kids? Have you been
able to take a look at how he is with
his kids? Um? Yeah, I mean I haven't, like I
haven't had a lot of time with them either, you know. Um,
(16:26):
but he seems like, you know, they seem to kid
around kind of and like they have a nice They
seem pretty close. Does he talk with affinity for his kids?
Is that like a lot of the topic of conversation.
I know a lot of people, you know, are are
scared and shy away from talking about their kids because
they're afraid that this person that they're gonna date doesn't
(16:46):
like that. But in this case, he's got kids of
his own, does he does he speak affectionately about his
own kids? Oh yeah, oh yeah, definitely. Well look, I
think that's a start, and um, you know, I think
that with me. I saw my wife with her kids,
and I was like, Okay, she's a good mom. She
takes care of her kids, she handles her business, she
(17:08):
disciplines them the right way, they have respect for her,
they're well put together. So that after I saw that,
I thought it would be a good time to introduce
her to my kids, which was, you know, kind of
a difficult thing because I didn't have the easiest of
of divorce process of the divorce process going on, so
it was I was always very nervous about introducing um
(17:31):
my kids to other people, which I didn't forever until
I met my wife and felt comfortable about how she
was with her kids, and they ended up getting along famously.
I mean, uh, And what I was. I travel a lot,
So I was in a certain city that was close
to them, and and her kids were close to to us,
and really we were just out and about and we
(17:51):
went and did an event and took him to a
hotel and they all kind of had a good time,
went swimming and all that stuff. And then you know
that the rest after that was always positive. So they
all got along. You know, they fought a little bit
like any uh, you know family would do. But um,
you know it, are any of them still in the
(18:12):
house or three of them are gone? Three of them
are off to school and doing other things and graduated,
you know, and then we have two left here. So
my my youngest stepson just turned sixteen yesterday. He's still
here and now he's driving and it's gone to buy
in a flash. I've known him since he's three years old.
And then um uh, my daughter's ten. So those are
(18:34):
the only two that are left. And then the other
ones are are all growing up now one and almost
twenty one. So it's been a fun ride. That's so great.
So do you have any suggestions on like like a
things like what kind of setting should we be in?
Do you think for the kids to meet each other?
(18:54):
I think it might be cool, you know what, just
do something fun where they can have fun together, like, uh,
take him to Wet and Wild or go to like
a theme park or something like that that's a good
way kids ice. They can hang out with each other,
they can go run around and and do fun stuff
together and you know, like kids would do if as
if they're meeting friends right as opposed to like some
(19:14):
formal dinner we're like you're sitting across from Yeah, yeah,
I know sister or you know step sisters. So I
think in a fun environment is always a really really
cool way for for young people to break the ice. Okay,
that's a good idea. I'm thinking maybe even mini golf
or something like that. Do people's don't great? Yeah, something
like that bowling mini golf like you know, yeah, I
(19:38):
don't know where you live, but like a small theme
park Disney Went and Wild. Their kids always love to
go to the water parks together, that kind of stuff,
don't car Okay, yeah, no, I think that's a good idea,
good idea. Well, thanks you. I appreciate it, of course,
thank you so much, because, um now you've given me
some um you know, now at least I have some ideas.
(19:58):
Like I before, I was just like I have no,
I can't even I don't know. I've just been nervous,
you know, Yeah, I completely relate and understand. And UM,
I got your email from the producers, so I'll send
you the bill. It's only gonna be a hundred for
this short call. I'm just just playing anyhow. Nice to
talk to you and good luck with all that. Thank
(20:20):
you so much, Thank you. Bye. Hi, it's up late.
Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. How are
you today? Oh? I'm good? Are you? I'm doing great? Um?
So um, thank you so much for taking my call. Um.
I'm so. I'm thirty six. My boyfriend is twenty six. Um,
(20:43):
we've been together for a while. Um. Anyways, we've been
talking a lot about having kids lately and uh. Um,
so I've kids have always been part of my plan
and I feel like my biological clock is ticketing. Um,
and so I really want to get married and start
(21:04):
trying for kids. But when we started talking about it,
he thinks that kids are like four years away for
him at least. But I'm worried that four years might
be too late for me. Should I Should I stay
in this and be patient with him? Or like, should
I try and find someone who's more like in the
line with my timeline? Wow, what a tricky question where
(21:28):
I'd hate to give you the wrong advice on this one.
But how long? First of all, there's some important factors.
You said you've been a long together for a long time.
How long is a long long time? Um? Well it's
been like, well, a long time for me is three years.
The three years He was twenty three and you were
thirty three at the time. Yeah, so three years. It's
kind of a long time. And when you first started dating,
(21:49):
was this any part of the discussion at all that
you would like to have kids? And obviously he knows
you're just a little bit older than him. Um, I'm
sure it's in the back of his mind that you
would probably want to have kids at some point. Um,
did that ever come up in the beginning or all
of a sudden, Did you just spring it on him
that you know what, I think it's time for us
to have kids. Yeah. No, we definitely have had those
(22:09):
conversations since the beginning. It was you know, I would
not have gotten with him in the first place if
he hadn't been someone who have said that he wanted kids. Uh,
it's just that, Um, now I'm realizing, Oh no, this
like age gap, uh might actually be a problem. Well,
this is something you often hear. I mean, look, I
mean there are a couple of different other factors. Does
(22:31):
his career prevent him from being able to put the
time in it that's necessary to be a father. Is
there anything going on with regards to his his professional
life that would prevent him. Does he travel a lot?
Or is he a baseball player or rock star? I mean,
is there something that that keeps this man, keeps him
on the road all the time that he wouldn't be
(22:51):
able to put the time and necessary to be a
good dad. Uh No, No, he works a pretty standard
like nine to six job um in finance. Like he's
very you know, he's he's got his stuff together. Everything is,
everything's in a good place. I think he just feels like,
you know, he's not really you know, he wants to
(23:13):
do traveling and stuff like that, and you know he
feels like there's just a lot that he still wants
to do before having kids. Well, look, I mean there
there are a couple of things. One he has to
respect that you know, you you're having anxiety about your
biological clock. Although that as we know now, there are
things you can do with regards to science that enable
(23:35):
you to carry children and bear them a lot older
than you used to be able to do back in
the day that's available, but he also has to respect
your desire to to do this in a in a
in a natural way. And and so I think, you know,
three years just my opinion, and all of a sudden,
this relationships and I get I get like a d
(23:55):
M on Instagram from this guy who is mad at
me because you broke up with them. Um, no, I
I think that probably time you have that talk with
him and say, hey, look, we've been together three years.
I've invested this time into you. You know me well
enough that this is kind of something that I really
see on the horizon and want to do before I
feel like it's too late or I have to go
(24:15):
through obstacles to make it more difficult for me to
have kids. And I think it's it's definitely worth the conversation. Yeah, yeah,
I'm I guess I'm worried that you know, if I
if for some reason I break up with him, like
that's a no go, then you know, well I just
ruin my chances at all. But I guess we'll we'll
find out. Well, I mean, look, you don't have to
(24:36):
break up with them. But you know, maybe feel it,
feel it out, because sometimes guys will prolong the you know,
they'll they'll just kind of there. There might never be
a time, you know what I mean that they'll say
he wants to have kids and he just enjoys dating you,
which is perfectly fine. But if you have different life
goals for yourself and and and the way you envision
you know, being a mother, and that's not going to
(24:57):
play into his plans, and then maybe it is good
good to cut it short. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, cool, Well,
thank you so much, Thank you appreciated, Bhie, thank you
made to you. Holdine is the and busy man. Oh
(25:23):
I'm so sorry. Let me let me turn that down.
The problem by all means, please play our music at
all times in your house. That's awesome. I had to
go back and it brought back so many memories. I mean,
ninety degrees in rising, it's a classic. I'm loving the
backdrop with the co posters back there, the Moman ruge,
what is that? The aviator? Gladiator? Oh gladiator? Nice, very nice.
(25:47):
Thanks for taking the time to join me today. Of course.
Oh here's my cat right on time. She loves boys
to her name is Pixy. Yes, what a cool name. Hey, Okay,
you can go, let me talk to Jeff. Um, I'm
so excited to me You've been such a huge fan
for a long time. Thank you. I'm totally flattered and
(26:09):
excited to meet you too. I really appreciate it. Yeah,
of course. Um. So I'm just gonna jump in with
my question. Um, So, it seems like, you know, back
in the day, there was like rivalries among the groups, right,
but recently, you know, we see guys from different groups
doing things together, right, like the boy Man Christmas specialty
you were in last year. So aside from maybe just
(26:31):
being like a little bit older and wiser, what do
you what do you think has changed to sort of
encourage those kind of collaborations. Well, here's what's really interesting, Donna,
because we never really had a rivalry with the other
other quote unquote boy bands. I know, it's it's contrary
to popular belief and it's not a it's not a
great hot button for the media, but we really really
(26:53):
had a ton of respect for both the Backstreet Boys
groups we were compared to Backstreet Boys and instinct although
we were un formulated a little bit differently and that
we put ourselves together and considered ourselves a vocal group.
Certainly years later, we're thrilled and honored to be mentioned
in the same company with those guys and you know,
experience in the same sort of journey, the high highs
(27:15):
and low lows that those guys that we had nothing
but respect for them, they had tons of hits, tons
of talent, and we're just great guys to be around
on the road. I mean, like you had mentioned there,
there was the boy band Christmas Special, there was this
thing called back Sync. They had this thing here in
Vegas called the After Party. I'm part of a company,
a group called A T C K with A J
(27:36):
and christ you know. Um, so you know, I I
have an affinity and love and appreciation for those guys,
their journey, their work ethic and just what what type
of great people they are. You know, haven't been in
the business now for twenty seven years, it's anniversary. You know,
you don't really come across people that are really true
and genuine and and great folks to be around. And
(27:59):
to be honest, it sounds like I can't answer, but
those guys are all fantastic dudes. Okay, And because I
just saw Backstreet in Vegas two weeks ago, and now
I have to ask when are we going to see nine? Well, look, yeah,
as I mentioned, it's our twenty fifth anniversary. Thanks for
asking the question. Um, we're thrilled and excited that so
many people are coming out to see us. I mean
we've we've been you know, back since two thousand and
(28:21):
thirteen when we toured with Boys the Men and New Kids,
and since then, I've had multiple tours. The fans are
always there for us. We're gonna be recording some stuff
last week of I want to say May, uh, first
week of May, we're recording some new material, and then
we're gonna be back on the road end of August,
probably into September, and then go through the holiday season.
I don't know that we'll probably do a holiday tour
(28:42):
like we've done in the past, but we will definitely
be on the road, you know, going out there and
uh hitting the pavement, doing some shows for our fans.
Were super excited about it. That's awesome. I'm super excited.
And I just have to say this gift is one
of my favorite Christmas songs. Thank you. I mean you
look the Christmas album I'm proud of all the material
and feel blessed and fortunate and lucky to be a
(29:03):
part of any of it. But I think that the
Christmas music for us, because we're a true court quartet.
I think the fact that we can, you know, arrange
all the harmonies and the vocal stacks that we like
to do. We I feel like the Christmas music is
our best stuff. So I appreciate the compliment. Every year
I have to listen to it, I find it and
I'm like, Okay, I love this song and totally superficially
(29:25):
you're a tiny box, but you look fabulous. I thank you,
very appreciate. I'm trying to keep up with the young bucks.
You know, I'm about to turn forty nine here in
a few days, so I'm trying to try to stay
young and vibrants so we can, uh, we can still
compete in our old age are anti created souls. I'm
right behind you, so don't say old age, please you.
(29:49):
And uh, I appreciate your time down and and asking
me such great questions and the compliments to yeah, no problem.
It's so great to me, you know, I'm I'm so
happy to do it. Thank you, Okay, Hey, how are
you good. How are you I'm doing I'm doing great. Thanks,
Thanks a lot for hopping on with me. Yeah. So,
(30:10):
being in the industry so long, we're all curious to
know what is the one song you wish she never
had to sing? Ever again, that's a good one. You know.
I hate to sound like a corny person, but I
love all the songs I mean, you know, especially the
ones that were hits that you know, people say, oh
my gosh, I'm so sick of singing I Do or
(30:32):
Invisible Man or Hardest Thing or whatever the hit is
or song that we've done. Um, it's actually the opposite.
I used to not like singing some of the songs
that we recorded back in the day in concert, like
Dizzy or the Way You Want Me To, because I
wanted to sing all the love songs and ballads. But
now many years later, those are tempo dance songs. Yeah,
(30:55):
I think that they seem relevant now. So it's the opposite.
I actually like singing more songs then the ones I
don't like. I mean, you know, I wish I had
a different answer and said, oh man, I hate singing
because of you, but I get it. Joked out of
it out of it every time because the crowd responds
differently every time. And you know, look at this point
(31:15):
you mentioned many years, many years later, for anybody to
know any of the lyrics to any of our songs
and back to us. I'm thrilled. That's awesome. My first
concert was actually one of the All That tours of
ninety eight degrees, so I'll never forget. Well, thanks, We're
we're part of the world. Are you in? Where was
that at UM in southern California? It was like before
they tore down the Universal Amphitheater. Yeah, that's right, So
(31:38):
that was And so you got Monica and the Keenan
and kel and n that's fun. Well, I appreciate that. Geez,
that's awesome. Thank you. Yeah, so glad you guys have
all success witching many years ahead. Thank you guys for
having such great anthems. Oh, I appreciate it, and I
love the love. And thanks Joyce. I appreciate they appreciate
(32:00):
the support seriously, Thanks Joyce, what great calls. We're gonna
take a little break and we're gonna get right into
the Q and A. So the question, the first question
is how did I meet my beautiful wife, Amanda. It
(32:23):
was very interesting. So a friend of mine, Jordan's Knights,
who is a member of New Kids on the Block.
He and I had been touring for a couple of
years together as solo artists and having a lot of fun,
and he asked me to be a part of this
thing that he had called he was doing called Jordan's Idol,
and jordan Idol was essentially a basically a version of
his version of American Idol would where fans would come
out and they would sing covers and then a winner
(32:45):
of the contest would get to record with Jordan's and
Jordan wanted me to be a judge. Well, I was
really busy with my kids. I was going through going
through a divorce and only had limited amounts of times
time to spend with my kids. And at that time
I was like, look, I get I have visitation with
my kids. I can't make it. So Jordan was like, look,
you have to be here, please bro do it. So
(33:06):
I drove to l a um from Orange County and
and um, you know, reluctantly went and uh and then
judge this contest and my wife was there, my future
wife was there at a v I P table, and
I thought I was gonna be really, really cool, and
I sauntered up to her like she was gonna know
who I was, and said, hey, you must be one
(33:28):
of Jordan's younger fans. And she was like, no, I'm
in my thirties. You know you're by the way, you're
sitting at my table, and she kind of dismissed me,
which I was kind of like taking her back, and
it was definitely a bruise to my ego. But I
was like, hey, you know, what's your name? And she
told me her name was Amanda, and she really kind
of ignored me, and then her friend said, don't you
know who this guy is. It's a guy from ninety degrees.
(33:48):
So her exact words were, what do you want a cookie?
So I was like, I walked my butt back to
my own judgment judge chair and spent the rest of
the night doing the doing the thing in the contest
and all that. But on my way out she denies this,
but she followed me. On my way out, I was
going home to be with my kids and do their
(34:09):
homework with them, and she said, hey, where are you going.
I said, well, I gotta go home and be with
my kids. And by the way, you didn't know who
I was earlier. And then um, we didn't exchange numbers
at the time, but we exchanged Twitter handles, and so
I immediately d M her and was trying to chat
her up, and I slid into the d M s
and all that stuff. And then eventually I just started
(34:29):
seeing her uh now and again on the road. It
wasn't anything seriously I was taking seriously. I never really
wanted to get married again. I was kind of disenchanted,
disenchanted with relationships. But she was sweet, She really had
her stuff together. She was a good mom, she was impressive,
she didn't rely on me to do everything for her,
(34:50):
and she was just there for me at a very
rough time in my life. So um ended up being
a blessing in disguise that I went to the jordanal
event and she changed my life. The other question is
how did I know I was ready to marry? Well,
you know, look, I again, I didn't think I was
ever going to get married again. I obviously I love
(35:12):
women and and dating is okay, and and you know,
sort of wanted to focus on being a father. But
this person came into my life and completely changed it
around for the better, almost effective immediately. And you know,
I sat there and it kind of was like a
revelation to me. I was visiting her in uh in
l A. She was doing something, she was in the
(35:34):
medical field, doing something, and I visited her at a
restaurant at her hotel, and I thought, wow, you know, um,
this one might be the one. I remember, you know,
going home after hanging out with her and telling my parents, Man,
I think this is gonna be the person that I
end up you know, having a long term relationship with.
And you know, eventually, very shortly thereafter, Um, we got married.
(35:57):
We kind of just fell in love with each other
and life got better with with both of us in
each other's lives, and um, the rest is history totally
changed my life around, all right. So the question is
do men have a one track mind? Can they listen
to women when they're also doing something else? Now, this
is something you want to talk about pet peeves. We
talked about pet peeves earlier, um, and one of the
(36:20):
questions was my pet peeve, mine's lazy people? Well, probably
my wife Amanda's pet peeve is the fact that I
cannot do more than one thing at a time. If
I'm crafting an email in my phone, I am literally
hearing the words as I'm typing them, and she could
be saying, well, you need to take the trash out
or the pool guys gonna come, and I cannot hear
(36:41):
anything else. So one track mind, it's kind of a rough,
rough sort of term for that. I would say focus.
I would say I'm focused on one thing, and I
don't speak for all men. There are other guys that multitasks,
can talk texts and you know, do all kinds of things.
I have to be focused on whatever it is, and
(37:02):
it doesn't necessarily have to do with being a man.
It could be that I have like a d D
and I have to like focus on that because if
I start to focus on a bunch of other things
that I can't pay attention. But in this case, I
would say most men do have a one track mine.
It's been wonderful spending time with you, great calls, great
Q and A. I loved, you know, spending some time
(37:24):
with everybody, and love the fact that twenty five years later,
degree still has fans out there, and it's been a
pleasure and honor for me to spend so much time
with you, you probably learned a little bit too much.
But one last thing I want to talk about is
nine Degrees is gonna be on the road recording some
new music. I have a new song out right now
called Lit featuring Pompeii, debut number one on the iTunes
(37:47):
Dance chart. I'm very, very proud of it. It's been
a blast hanging out here on How Men Think. Thanks
for having me, We'll see you soon. This is How
Men Think and I Heart Radio London Audio Production. Listen
each Thursday on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcast or
wherever you get your podcasts.
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