Secure with Our Insecurity

The guys waste zero time getting personal with sex, guilt, and when they're going to call you.

Brooks and Gavin talk about commitment and the right time to have kids.

And, the guys reveal unknown "bathroom habits" and  let you in on men and their secrets.  Is it TMI?

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
This is how men think with brooks Like and Gavin
to grab and I heard radio podcast. Here we go
how men think? Round two? This is brooks Like with
my dude, the smiling guy right here, and I'm Gavin
the girl. I haven't said anything and you're laughing. What's up, buddy,
I'm just thinking about what this round is going to
turn into. YEA, according to the last show, I just

(00:24):
never know what I'm gonna walk into. We have an
interesting first topic, but first we got Dmitri got Rick
and we've got Ryan here with us. And Dimitri has
fired up about something. He has a burning topic. We're
not We're not sugarcoating this one. We're getting into the
heat right now. What is it, buddy? Here's the thing.
Our producer Amy came to us, she said on an
email and said, how do you guys, how do you

(00:45):
finish off going to the bathroom? So I said, and
I said, well, what do you mean? I said? She said,
when you're sitting down? I said, if this is the
way I'm thinking, I said, I used toilet. We're talking
about number two yea as much as any And she said, okay, well,
here's the thing we'd like to try new products. And
and I'm reading and I said, and she said, we

(01:07):
we have some white bees that you can use instead
of in lieu of toilet paper. And I said, And
before I could even say what I had to say,
Ryan and Rick responded and they're like, we'll try him.
So I don't know that that's something there, guys, apparently
some deep seated thing like I don't know. I'm I'm
old fashioned. There's toilet paper. There's been no need to

(01:27):
change it. So I've used it, so that's what I do.
But these two were clearly having trouble there and wanted
to delve in to try something new. So my understanding
is that you guys receive some of these these flushable
wipes and and give it a go. It's a flushable
wipe of white one called dude wipes, dude white more

(01:52):
likely to try. Dude wipes are pretty good, you know.
I And thank you Dmitri. I I kind of you know.
I had always seen him in the bathroom always we
go to Alaska, we go fishing, they are always up there,
and I never used him, and I was always like,
I wonder why, Like and I'm a very sort of
particular guy. When going number two, Um, I build before

(02:17):
you sensing a new song coming on here, I build
what they call it Texas top hat, I believe, which
is basically, does anybody know what anybody know what this is?
So you make hats and out we're living. It's a
Texas top hat. You basically take the toilet paper and
you put it over the toilet seat before you go

(02:38):
and sit down, even at home. At home, I just
got a brand new toilet. Why I used it because
your kids on the seat. I like the warmth, it's soft.
It's just a very nice place to kind of rants.
And then if you ever run out, maybe diapers are

(02:59):
more of you. Well, if you ever run out of
the toilet paper, you always know you have, you know
about four or five maybe eight different Probably that's probably
why you run out, because you already used eight of them. Dude,
if you're in a bar and you like have to
go for some reason, you want to build a little
nest on the thing. Fine, but you're building a nest
on office's home in college. Does not matter. I've I've
been building it for a long time. It takes a

(03:25):
stop hat. So when the dude wipes came up, I
was raised my hand. I'm like, I gotta do this,
not to put him down. I already have that method sealed.
But he sat down. I was like, you know, I've
seen these things and I want to try it. Well,
you know, get down there, go and I start pulling
out the dude wipes and I'm sitting there and I'm
kind of like, oh, this is a little weird. It's

(03:47):
not as comfortable. I actually did not like him as
much as I thought I would. I thought it would
be you know, clean, swift, good, ready to go, but
it was small, wet, just not a skiss comfortable as
I would have liked, you know, sort of like this
conversation not as comfortable as I would have liked. Where's

(04:07):
the food get here? I can't believe that you do
it at home, though. I get it when you're in
a public place, you don't know who's been on that seat,
but like it's you're doing it for warmth at home
another other thing I do, you know, so like like
right before the toilet, there's like drips of p or whatnot,
So I'll pull the toilet paper or a paper from

(04:29):
you know, from previous maybe at the office or in
a public restaurant or whatever, and I'll wipe that down
and then slide that to the corner and then build that.
I got a bathroom at my house. You mind coming
over in my place for a little while. Do you
have like a handy belt on that you come into
every stall with that you have like apparatus and sprays.

(04:50):
I feel like he's gonna end up on her. He's
getting enough on like shark tank with some sort of
bathroom invention. I'm afraid I'm gonna be in a bathroom
one time and I'm here knock at the door, and
it's gonna be rick Like. I have some wipes if
you need, I'm here for you. But I will share
an experience I did go to I go to Tokyo
quite a bit for work, and they obviously are kind
of the king of the day's and all of the
you know, the high end toilet seats. And I built

(05:12):
my little Texas and I was sitting there and I
was like, I don't even need to put the Texas
top hat on because this seat is warm. Yeah, there's
You probably stayed in some of these hotels, like traveling
hotels that have cleaner Oh yeah, they're dynamite those. Yeah,

(05:33):
the button. Someone comes by and thanks you for staying
at the hotel and they wipe you for you. Correct, correct, Yeah,
I don't. I have yet to stay at a place
where that exists. But so, yeah, so I tried the wipes.
I actually wasn't a big fan of it. It was
a little small in the hand as I like, kind
of the you know whatever, and uh, it was a
little moist and not as good as I like. So

(05:53):
that is it because you have large hands? It maybe yeah, maybe, Okay,
right now, second, you're hung up on it. So after
you use this thing, the wet thing, do you follow
it up with the dry thing or do you just
in this swampy That's a great question. Yeah. No, I
did not want to walk out of there and still

(06:15):
kind of have the otherwise. Otherwise you gotta go to
the hand dryer and just kinda back back it up
against it. So he has a hair dryer in his belt.
That Ryan. What are your thoughts on experience like deals
with some of my neuroses, Which is the first thing
I said to Amy, as I said I'm reading the back,

(06:36):
are these definitely fleshable? Because if I ruined my plumbing
at my house and I have to get a plumber
in here. That's going to be an issue. It's not
worth it to me. She assured me that I'm being
neurotic and it's all good. The bigger thing for me,
I have a friend who swears by them, which is
partly why I jumped at the opportunity to have them
sent to me. And he said. The analogy he gave

(06:56):
me was like, look, if you got mud on your arm,
would you use a dry paper towel to get it off?
Or would you use a wet paper tality could agree more?
And I thought that was a relatively astute observation. Mud
or dry mud wet by nature. There's no such thing
as dry mud. Dry mud is dirt that just blew

(07:17):
your mind, wipe it off, and mud you gotta get
the mud off, but then you gotta cleaning something, and
a dry piece of paper is not going to clean.
So so just saying, my so have you been? Are
you converting? Now? Are you a dude? Way? You never
really asked me my opinion, I thought, okay, right now, okay.
The one thing I was gonna say is when you're

(07:39):
in a public the time you would need it most
for me is not when you're at home. It's when
you're in an away toilet, and when you're in a
way toilet. If you're in an office environment, the last
thing you're gonna do is get up from your desk
and walk down the office corridor with the dude wipes
in your hands. So so you advertise to everybody in
the office that you're going to drop a deuce in

(07:59):
the through them. So I think I would need a
travel size, pocket friendly Fannie pack. It's something that you
could slip into your pocket and be discreet when you
go out there, or if this catches on, restrooms will
just supply them. Well, that's the thing that sounds like
toilet paper kind of monopolizes the whole thing. That's that's

(08:21):
maybe you're in on shark tank. Correct, that's right, Fannie pack,
a dude white dispensary for restaurants in airports. Someone's gonna
steal that. Giving a percentage of that coming. You've got
Mark Cuban written all over it. I'm sure you can
get it at the duty free. Dude. What's that? What's

(08:44):
that line from anchor man? This really escalated quickly, all right,
I haven't tried it. I don't know. I don't know
if I'm willing to try it, but I think it's
more prominent I've heard. I actually was listening to podcast
where they were talking about this the other day, So
I think it's actually more prominent than we probably know. Yeah,
I guess the argument would be, you shower with water, right,

(09:06):
you're cleaning yourself off with something wet. Nobody get clean
something wet. Correct. You don't just put a towel on
your body, So that would be the argument. I'm a believer.
I'm staying, Danielle, can we get can we get Gavin
some dude wipes? And I don't want him right now? Now? Well,

(09:27):
and then you can try him out. We're gonna on
the show. We're gonna test a lot of products, so
I appreciate you stepping up to this one right here. Hey,
it's Brooks like and it is how men think we
have Gavin, Dmitri, Rick and Ryan. We're we're taping this
right now in Oakland, California, where we're away from Los Angeles,

(09:47):
and Ryan is away from his wife and the two
year old boy and the baby on the way, and
he's dealing with a little bit of guilt. Let's get
into this. So look, we're wearing it all out here,
are we not. It's just not this. I was this
is a safe place because because I'm getting a look
from Gavin that is like he doesn't approve of this,

(10:11):
and it's very off. Let's call it a safe place
from now. I was told to judgment free zone, but okay,
call it a safe place from now. Tell the story
and then we'll decide out. Okay. So, so I had
an issue and have an issue currently, which is that
I have about five hairs unibrow hairs that continue to
grow back. Then my wife is like, this is a
bad look, like she would pluck them because she said

(10:32):
it's a bad look. And eventually she gave me as
a gift a laser treatment in l A. I went
to this this laser clinic, went and sat in the
waiting room and there are about fifteen women getting bikini
line lasers. I was the only guy. Luckily, this Armenian
guy with like a sweater vest of chest hair came

(10:53):
in after me. But I have gotten one procedure done
of laser on my in between my eyebrows. Amazing, dude,
I have one like black one. My hair is brown
and I have one black one that just grows right
there and have to like pluck it up. It doesn't matter,
it's one had just pluck it. What do you because

(11:16):
the rest of your life, Like if you can just
do away with it and be done with it, it'll
never grow your you know what. I actually would do
a laser on. I'd like to actually do it on
the back of my hair so when I get a haircut,
it stays clean whole time. So maybe like next time
I get a haircut, I'll go somewhere and get it
laser anywhere you recommend? Where'd you go? Was it good?
You're looking for a place you cut? Place you do

(11:40):
they do? Do? They do the back? Yeah? They do everything.
I mean they When I walked in, they the guy
that was behind me, they had like an industrial sized
laser beam thing like but for me, it took literally
ten seconds like five zapps and I was out. Really
can't think. Can they come into it? Like, I don't
want to truck down to a laser place? What do

(12:02):
you that's what are your laser at? First? What are
you laser in? I don't know. I got a few
strangely things on my shoulders. I guess I could take
care of it, but I mean I don't. I'm not
a I don't feel like I need to do it,
But I guess if it never grows back, but what's
to say it won't go back right next to it? So, Gavin,
do you have have you ever plucked any hairs on

(12:23):
your grab? It's perfect right here, very funny. Uh probably,
I'm sure I've done this before, but nothing comes out,
you know, at the center between my eyebrows. But um,
he's looking for a laser that grows hair. Be So
here's a question. Well, we all know that fashions change, right,

(12:45):
styles change. It's always a moving target, essentially culturally speaking,
music fashion change, religions change, politics, ex change. What if,
somewhere down the line, let's say it's within our lifetimes,
Anthony Davis, it becomes in readibly attractive to have a
couple of hairs in between your two eyebrows, and you're like, damn,
I wish I could get those back. What are you

(13:06):
gonna do about that? The technology will already exists, like
to get a hair transplant and have them plugged in.
Think about the people that reverse it. Think about the
people that threw something away, buddy. Somebody threw away an
old album, right, obviously not one of yours. They throw
away an old album, someone bought it on eBay and
may or sold it on eBay and made a fortune. Right.

(13:27):
So to Gavin's point, all of a sudden, it's like,
this is the hottest thing to have a unibrow. It's
not going to be Anthony and Anthony Davis from the NBA.
That's what makes them attractive. Oh, I didn't say it was. Well,
I'm assuming that's where you're going. Okay, But women do
it like on their arm everywhere weekly. The same be

(13:51):
said for them. But what if their car stalls in
a cold climate and they need to grow that hair
back and there they are freezing? Do you do a
lot fear in your life? Like you live a lot
of hope, a little bit of everything? Gentlemen, you I
love your hypothetical, dude. I love that we went from
from Ryan's eyebrow, who was stalled car in Minnesota. You

(14:14):
never know. Let's say you're at the Mall of America
and it's a giant storm. I wish, I wish I
could grow hair stuck that morning. Man, Let's talk about
another issue that you raised, Ryan, UM, set this one
up for us. We're talking about and this is I

(14:35):
think a real issue for men and women. Um, you
call it man guilt. Can you explain to Ustin to
our listeners what man guilt is. I think Rick is
the expert in this territory, but I will tell you that, Yeah,
there's an element of whenever I go away and my
wife is home with go away on work or like

(14:58):
vacation or well to very astute question, thank you, Uh,
I would say when you go away. When I go
away and work, the man guilt is lessoned because I
am away for work and I'm earning money for the
family and and and all that. But if I go
away on pleasure with buddies, then the man guilt is
that much more because she's home taking care of our son,

(15:21):
you know, dealing with the brunt of of motherhood essentially,
while I'm off having a good time. So you have
to kind of temper the when you were laying back
how things are going, it's I feel guilty saying like
I'm having an amazing time. Can't lie to her and
say it sucks. I can't wait to come home, and
I knew you were going to be the one time

(15:42):
here and can't you do that? I think, yes you can?
And have you done that? I've that's gonna add to
his guilt if he's now lying to it. He's away
and he's lying, that's just gonna Do you feel better
about your relationship by lying with her by saying I'm
having a bad time versus you worried that she's going
to be almost jealous of you for having a great

(16:04):
time and therefore sparing her the competitive sort of angst
regarding you having time off from the interesting thing is
I bring this on myself. If I were to tell
her I'm having an amazing time, she would genuinely be
happy that I'm having an amazing time and making them great?
What do you feel so bad about it? So? Why
why do you do that? Because I feel guilty that

(16:27):
she's at home not having a great time? So about
her is about you? Is about her not having a
great time or that you're having a great time? I
don't think my brain can comprehend with that. Can I
tell you? I used to have I used to have
this man guilt, and what I finally came to a
point where I realized if I didn't do these things,
if I if I felt bad when I went away

(16:48):
for work, or if I went away from my buddy's
birthday and we went to Vegas or whatever it is
and I felt bad about it, or if I didn't
go for some reason, which I think is a mistake.
To not do those things. I think you need to
give your family, at your work, your friends, the best
version of yourself. And if you stay home and you
don't do these things, then you're gonna be grumpy. You're
gonna be the you're not giving your wife. Then then

(17:08):
you're gonna be like, you're gonna have more fights in this.
The thing is give her the opportunity to do it,
to let her say, hey, listen, go away, have fun
with your friends, have a weekend or whatever it is.
Let her do it, to show her that there's nothing
wrong with it. And then when you do it, it's
it's okay because because you're sharing now, and it's like
and she needs it just like you need it. If
you don't do these things, you're not gonna be the

(17:30):
same with your wife. You're not gonna be the same
with your kids. There was a time where um, I
hadn't gone away, and then I started traveling for work
a little bit and my my, you know, kids were
like whatever, my my, my, you know. Youngest was like,
I don't know. She's a small girl, she's like two
one and a half. Of the time, she didn't really
she paid more attention to my mother in law and

(17:50):
my wife and I went away to New York for
a week for work, and I came back and she
has been daddy's a little girl ever since. And it's
like there's a dynamic that changes. Sometimes you have to
mind people what they have or what they're, what there is,
and you have to be the best version of yourself
and bring that back because that's gonna chave you if
you don't go and it gets stay on on this
that then then you're not helping anybody. You've never have

(18:11):
been times that I've gone away when when milestones occur
in my with my son that I'm away for when
it's like he's now taking his first steps or he
said his first word, and that's that makes you feel
tremendously guilty. I get I understand that. Yeah, that makes sense. Well,
don't go away on his birthday? Yeah, trip on Yourn's

(18:35):
actual birthday. How do you know if you missed it,
that it happened at all and it wasn't a ploy
to make you feel that you work so suspicious. That's
that's deep because his wife to him that, how do
we know? It's weird? Because when I got home, my

(18:56):
wife had told me he had taken his first steps
and he was not walking, and she said he just
decided not to walk anymore. It's yeah, you're right, You're right.
Can I nailed it? You nailed it? Trust she has
the video proof. The other thing I think about the
guild is like you're vested with that person, that relationship,

(19:19):
whether it's a work relationship or a marriage or a
friendship or whatever. And if you walk away or technically speaking,
or you're going on a trip or whatever, you're breaking that.
You know, maybe it's with a team, or maybe when
you left hockey, or maybe it's whatever that is, Like
maybe you felt I don't know the circumstances, but maybe
you're like I feel guilty, you know, signing that contract

(19:41):
with the such and such team, right, you know, like I,
But but reality is is to Dmitri's point is you
do need to do things that make you a healthier
person and a help and a happier person. And I
think overall that will make the whole situation dynamic better.
So I agree with you. I exactly agree with what
you said and what Dmitri said. So when I was

(20:01):
released by the l A Kings, I was playing in town,
finally living at home. My wife and I had done
long distance for three and a half years. I was
playing hockey in d C in Toronto. She's living in
l A. So we've done a long distance like that
for three and a half years. Finally I'm playing in
l A for the King's life is amazing. I'm playing
hockey and at home. Then the King's released me and

(20:21):
I had a decision to make. Do I want to
go somewhere else again and be away from home and
continue to play hockey, or do I want to stay
at home? And I chi it was my decision. My
wife was like, I support you, and whatever you want
to do. You want to go to Carolina, you want
to go to Florida, wherever you want to go play.
I support you. You know, I love you and I
want you to have the career that you want. So

(20:43):
I support you and God bless her for that, and
I made the decision I do not want to be
away from my wife. As much as I wanted to
play hockey, which is at an all time high, it
just got better every day. My desire to be with
my wife was on a daily basis, was greater than
my desire to play hockey. It doesn't discount my desire
to play hockey. UM. So I do agree with that

(21:05):
that um and it was my decision. I wanted to
be with her, So I'm at peace with that decision.
But I also agree with what Dmitri said in a
little bit of that you can't miss somebody if they
don't leave, you know, so like missing somebody in a
relationship is a powerful thing. Like if I'm gone for
a couple of days, my wife misses me, and I
miss my wife, and that's an attraction to come back

(21:25):
home to so and I also want to have a
fantastic time while I'm here with you guys. Come home
and share some energy and stories with her, and she
sees this. This, this lights me up. And also that
distance from each other makes us gravitate towards each other.
So if you don't go, as Demitri said, if you
don't leave. Amy's ready to pipe in on this. What
is it? I think men feel guilty when they're being

(21:51):
selfish because you're taught don't be selfish, don't be selfish,
don't be selfish. But being selfish isn't always bad. So,
especially in the workplace, you sometimes feel guilt over making
certain decisions because you're looking out for number one. But
sometimes it's okay. And I'd love to hear what you
guys think about that. I agree with that. I I'm

(22:12):
an advocate for people to be selfish in their life
as far as what makes them happy. Now, that doesn't
mean step on people, that doesn't mean hurt people, that
doesn't mean but it means you have one life to
live here in charge of it. Nobody else is going
to do it for you. Something that's going to fulfill
you and light you up by all means, go do
it please. And I hate when people turned down the

(22:32):
thermostat on their life to accommodate other people. And especially
if you have a the right partner, maybe there's a
litmus test for the right partner in your life. Is
Ryan If you go away and you said I had
the most amazing time babe, this is awesome, and she says,
that's awesome. When I tell me more, I want to
hear all about it. That's the right partner. If you
have somebody that says, how dare you be away? Blah
blah blah, that's maybe the wrong partner for you. That's

(22:55):
how I look at it. My wife and I we
travel a lot for work, both of us um and
celebrate the opportunity to go and do these things that
each of us have the greatest life we could imagine,
and we support one another in doing it. But we
are being selfish in a way by doing it, but
we are connection is strong enough and we communicate well
enough that it's not an issue. You guys, what do

(23:17):
you think? Yeah, that makes sense. I mean I agree.
I mean, you're here, You've got four kids at home,
you're here. What's what's your wife thinking? We're in Oakland
right now. It's and that was the thing. It's like,
I said, hey, listen, I'm going up to Oakland. Um
we're gonna do the podcast from up there. And she said, okay, great.
She's very supportive. In fact, the night before I left,
she had to go to Colorado or something. So you know,

(23:39):
we told the kids it's you know, mommy's away tonight
and I'm here and then tomorrow night I'm gonna be away,
and it's like and you know, that's just that's the
way it is. And I think you have to be
supportive of each other. And when you don't, when you
start having whatever jealousy like, oh, you went to visit
too for your friends, you know, birthday or whatever. If
you have jealousy about somebody, about your partner having fun
and doing stuff that makes I'm happy, then that's not

(24:01):
that's not a healthy relationship. And there's an issue. There's
a deep, you know, underlying issue there. If you're if
things that make your partner happy don't make it doesn't
make you happy that they're happy, that's that there's a problem.
I can't give you a perspective of someone who doesn't
have children. Yes, sir, let's have it. Not married um,
single man. Yeah, you want me to put that out

(24:22):
for I'll put that out for it for you body,
very single, very eligible. But it's gonna be about a
woman missing you in every city. No, it's not about that.
It's it's for me. Uh. When I think about this conversation,
I hear. Your perspectives are all valid, They're all important,
right to each of you. That are important. Uh as

(24:43):
the person who doesn't have a family, Um, it's important
to me as well. Uh for I guess from this
sort of preventative angle which has been so here, I am.
I'm a I'm an adult, I'm not married, I don't
I don't have children. But I think a large part
of me delaying that game in my life essentially that

(25:03):
that element of what I would consider what makes it
a full life is that I know what my job
entails and the amount of travel that it entails, and
I always felt like I wouldn't have time for that.
And so I until I feel like I have time
for that. Uh as far as fatherhood is concerned, um,

(25:24):
I've always felt like I won't be ready for that.
And so you know, I'm somebody who grew up in
a lower middle class household. Um my dad was a
prison guard, my mom was a dtox specialist, and so
you know, we didn't have really money, but my dad
was there every day. So until I feel like I
could match that, which I may not be able to

(25:47):
ever do, because I mean, like I mean, if you're
read the Odyssey, right, So so sort of how it
sort of sums up this this uh, this life challenge
of of of a young man to try to try
to live up to the image of his father, which ultimately,
as we all know, is the impossible in so many ways.
The stories that you hear from a lot of dads.

(26:07):
Of course, not not all dads are great, but a
lot of guys who grow up knowing their fathers, they
paint this picture of their father that is absolutely and
you can't master it, you can't possibly live up to it,
I'm sure, the same way that some women with you
their mothers. And so because I felt like I wouldn't
be able to live up to that and be the
father my dad has been for me, uh, it's made

(26:28):
me sort of put that on the back burner and
in a lot of ways sort of put that element
of life on hold, because even though you guys are
celebrating great lives and full lives, I hear the struggle
that you have and and it's something that I understand
is valid, valid, uh level of anks for for anybody.
You know that in six situations. But to that point,

(26:49):
not that I'm telling you run out and get married
and have kids. But keep in mind, I don't think
when when my dad for everything he meant to me
and everything that I that, I think he was such
a great dad and he did this, and I don't
think he ever sat there and thought, oh my god,
I'm being this is look at me, I'm being a
great dad. I've got it all put together. I'm here
all the time. Listen. I like, I don't think that

(27:10):
I'm always there for my kids. I try and be
as much as I can. But when I see them,
I know that they don't. They don't look at me
and think, oh, he's never around. He's I don't think
my dad was ever like, look at me. I got
it all figured out. This is the perfect the perfect
situation just fell upon me. So keep that in mind
when you're like, I want to make sure that I'm
there for your kids. You'll be there, but it doesn't

(27:30):
mean constantly being there. So can I gab I ask
you a question because this is coming from somebody who
my twenties to thirties, I was intensely devoted to my
career as an athlete, didn't have the capacity or composure
to welcome a relationship really into my life. So I
know what you're talking about. Um, that switched when I
met and I actually switched personally in me a little

(27:53):
bit once I hit about UM, I developed a little
more composure and growth personally, and I met my wife
just at the right time in my life. But in
your life, what do you think that looks like, that
moment where maybe you do have that capacity to bring
on a serious relationship and a potential life partner or kids.

(28:15):
Do you have an idea of what that might look like?
Given your career as an artist, a traveling artist touring, UM,
you know, I sort of fantasize about what it could
look like, what it should look like, you know, sort
of like these uh I think we've all been sort
of brought up on these uh the with these these

(28:36):
these romance novel versions of what perfect looks like. And
as we all know, it's simply entertainment a lot of
those stories and they are the life is imperfect. But
we all sort of have been told what perfect should
look like, at least in many different versions of what
perfect should look like. UM. So of course I have

(28:57):
all of those those fantastical con steps of what it
should look like, right, but what it could look like.
Are two different things right and what it should could
look like? Do you think this should look like? Is
limiting you a little bit? Like trying to fit something
into this? So and so I've gotten and as you know,

(29:18):
about a year and a half ago, my mom had passed,
and so that sort of just sent everything just spinning,
you know, for me, just absolutely spinning. Um. So it
became much more sort of a reminder of of, uh,
you never know when it's going to happen, you know

(29:39):
what I mean, like how long your life is going
to be in these things? So it's some elements of
me or think sees sees the moment go out and
just have the greatest time and go crazy or whatever.
And of course there's an other element, which is you
know you're not going to be here forever and have
a family and make something in you know, the image
of yourself, of your father, of your mother, etcetera. So

(30:01):
I have an idea of what it like I said
it should look like, but this sort of, uh, the
the the high wall of what what what you're up
against in in in s like um, just speaking from
personal experience, I'm actually excited for you and I'm excited
to get to know you more and follow your journey. Um,
and it's gonna be surprising when it think when it

(30:22):
does happen, it's gonna be surprising and awesome. I never
thought I would marry an American girl. I thought the
rest of my life, i'd go back to Canada. I'd
live back in Saskatchewan. Um, maybe coach hockey back there,
something like that. Now I'm living in Los Angeles doing
a podcast with you guys, married to an American girl
who is a dancer, an artist, where I was a

(30:43):
sports guy. I mean, it's amazing. I once had a
good friend tell me, if you want to make God laugh,
tell him your plans, and and it was so true.
It ranks so true. I thought I had my life
laid out, this is the way it was gonna go.
And then one day somebody walked into my life. Julianne
walked into my life and changed everything. So, UM, be open.
My only advice to you would be open to things

(31:04):
that you aren't seeing. Um. I thought my life was
going one way, and man, did it go the other way.
And I'm so grateful for that. Said yeah, well, said,
so we're in agreement. We should all go to Vegas. Rick,
you call Ryan's mom wife and let her maybe ye
get Vegas. But a horrible time you're having with us

(31:28):
in Vegas. The one thing I do want to add
to that is my brother, who's five years older than me.
He kind of paved the path for myself and my
sister and whatnot and kind of set the bar pretty highs.
But I had kids a lot earlier than he did. Um.
He has a three year old now. But I felt
like as we were going getting into the age that

(31:50):
we are now, he was sort of always concerned about
lining up his ducks. You know. He was like, I
gotta make enough money, I gotta have the right house
I got, you know, or whatever. Um. And I think
once he had the kid, he was kind of like, oh, okay,
good like. And I kept telling him like, dude, just
do it, like, don't worry about it. You know, like

(32:10):
you don't know what the kids, you know, you don't
know how that's gonna work for you know. I mean,
it's a whole Once you have that child, it's a
whole another deal. It's a whole another ball game, you know,
especially between you and the kid and you and your wife,
you know, and whatnot. And so there's all these new dynamics,
but it's like, you know, I want to just encourage him,
like don't wait and go like have one because it
is really the best thing ever to have a kid,

(32:31):
a girl, boy, whatever, you know. And it's it's, uh,
you know, it's you never know what life's gonna wright you.
You know, I think that's to Brooks's point, it's cool
right on, This is how men think. And on this
show we have opened it up to your to our listeners,
will always have it open to our listeners. We want
to know questions, insight, comment from you guys. You can

(32:55):
email us at men at I Heart radio dot com.
And we have a question right now. We're gonna call
this segment is really like ask us anything. We're an
open source for you guys, men and women, ask us anything.
But we're going to call it a little more of
a fun name. Um. That's what he said is what
we're gonna go with for this segment. So Danielle, our producer,

(33:15):
has a question for us. All right, So this comes
from Jessica, and Jessica is asking from a man's perspective,
how are you guys affected by a woman's kind ecological?
Oh my god, rewind. This is from Jessica and she
is asking from a man's perspective, how are guys affected

(33:37):
by a woman's kindacological? Oh my god, sin ecological. I
can't do the word. Oh my god. Okay, gin ecological? Okay, Okay,
here I know, I got okay. This is from Jessica
and she is asking from a woman's perspective, how are

(33:59):
you guys affected by a women's issues such as endometriosis,
p MS, etcetera. I'll touch on the endometriosis when my
wife openly has admitted and has endometriosis. UM, God, bless
her heart. She does a lot of UM trying to
raise awareness for women to find out if they have it.

(34:20):
And I think it's a last episode. I believe one
in ten women have endometriosis. And can you explain what
that is? UM? I really don't know. I should have
more UM, but it it essentially can make getting pregnant
naturally a little more difficult. That it's something to do
with UM. Oh, Eastern's got it, Easton has it. It
can be siss on the so she does have siss

(34:42):
on over that. I don't. I'm not I don't know
how much I want to get into this exactly. And
my wife has it too. Um. And first of all,
it's incredibly difficult to get diagnosed. Yeah, the hell of
the time finding a doctor that knew what it was.
It's it sists on your uterus, and it causes intense pain. Um,
just all kinds of discomfort. She had to have an
like an incision and some was that lacroscopic surgery. Yeah,

(35:05):
to to have them remove it. They just can come back.
It's horrible. So and and it can be unpleasant or
uncomfortable during a course. Um. But for me, I mean,
I love my wife. This is nothing. This has no
bearing at all on our relationship or on like I
understand that her body. She didn't choose to get it,
she didn't do anything to get it. She has indometriosis.

(35:27):
We move forward with it. So we've done. We talked
about it last episode. We did uh IVF and froze
some of her eggs in case we do have trouble
getting pregnant naturally. Um. But fully accepting of my partner
of my wife, absolutely love her and we'll move forward
and whatever comes our way in life comes our way.
So for me, that's a non issue. May I be
so bold and ask the question that women all want

(35:50):
to know. But it's a bold one for you guys.
Do you care about period sex? Would that stop you?
This is one for Gavin, gav buddy, and tell the truth.
That's what this is. So tell the truth. So if
it's a no, we can handle it. We can handle it.

(36:12):
Thank you, Gavin. I think Dmitri, Okay, here's the thing
I'm not. I'm not again, I've done it. Um. I
think it's more preferable to be to the very beginning
or the very end of the period cycle. Um. But
you know, I think it's a good thing when you're
with someone that that regardless of the time, you guys

(36:34):
kind of want to be together. So if it happens
to be in the middle, then you know, you know
what to deal with it. I mean, obviously something. I
think that. So just so we can educate them, Daniel,
will you jump in here. It's not the middle you want.
The middle is the worst part. But I tell you
Day one is pretty light. I said, the beginning or

(36:55):
the end Day two and three, nobody wants to be
doing it. But day like four or five, you barely
would know. I mean, this is supposed to be it's
not as comfortable from a man's perspective, it's it's does
not the sensation is not as enjoyable. Yeah, from my

(37:18):
perspective is that the time of the month when men
should be planning their fishing trip. Oh, we'll look you there,
I gotta buy. What do you guys say? Personally? I mean,
from the beginning of when I first met my wife,
there's nothing that grosses me out. So it's like, it
is what it is. There's there is literally nothing that

(37:41):
could gross me out a thousand percent. We can find
something it goes I'm saying with respect to my sex
life with my wife, like, there's not I've never been
grossed out by any of that. It's like a fact
of life, and it is what it is. And I
can't agree with Brooks though. It's a total different sensation,
is what I you know, it's it's not not the same, so,

(38:01):
you know, quite frankly to me, it's a no, you know,
I'd rather wait the whatever you're waiting anyway, I will
say this, I don't know if I'm wrong on this one,
but and maybe we need producer Danielle or producering me
to wait in on this. I feel like towards towards
the end or maybe after you guys feeling a little
bit more of it. Are you feeling like you kind
of want to You're a little friskier two days before.

(38:22):
It's like whoa, And then the problem is we're actually
friskier during the days you don't want to do it.
It's really weird. It's like it's God's punishment maybe because
it's like that's when we really want it, but we
don't want to do it because do you know what
I'm saying? Because I don't want to do it on
those days, like when I look at the calendar and
I know I got like a vacation with somebody, and

(38:45):
you literally go, can you bleet me? Because you're so
bummed that the calendar just screwed you? And so we
don't want to do it either. I don't know. I
can't from the calendar. I get my wife and I
did long distance for three and a half years, and
sometimes it just lined up like that just because those

(39:06):
are the only days that we could make work with
my schedule or her schedule. UM, So I get it
that it's um that being said, I mean, you know
it's it's not my first choice. Um, but I've, as
Demitri said, have done it and um, but it's also
just a great time to get some damn good sleep
to you. Like, just just get some good sleep in there. Okay.

(39:30):
So the second question we have is from Amy Pass,
and our question is how come when we text you
three questions you only respond to one of them? We
prioritize the most important. I don't know, we can't figure
all three out. I mean, why are you sending three

(39:56):
rapid questions? Like why don't you just if you pick
a question, ask it and then we'll answer it. And
like why is this like the lightning round? Like send
us a question, we'll answer, Like pretend your text is
a conversation, Amy, you're a horrible texter. You will write
hey in the text, next, got next, a question next,
and it's like just hey, slow it down, think it through.

(40:19):
Ask us a question and we'll answer, and then ask
the next one. But if you sent three questions, it's
like it doesn't seem genuine, like do you really want
the answer? You're just trying to like, I don't know,
we'll give you an answer, but that's that's a lot,
so you want one at a time. Can you guys
talk about this to texting versus phone calls because we
want the phone calls, but it seems like you guys
prefer texting. What's everybody's thoughts on that. I have a

(40:40):
capacity to handle like three phone calls and five text
messages a day. That's about Yet then I'm on overload.
Um I honestly, I honestly like FaceTime most often, Like whatever,
whenever I call you, Amy, it's I FaceTime you because
it's just like, hey, it's an easy way to punch in,
punch out versus like texting, and just I don't have
a capacity to do that. I actually like the phone call.

(41:03):
I enjoy FaceTime more. It's like, hey, how are you?
There's my question? What's up? Okay? What are you doing?
A great piece that because you're handsome, but no one
wants a FaceTime to get the FaceTime coming in and
you're like, this is the last thing I want is
for them to see me right now. Face is I don't.
I don't give a deal on FaceTime. He's like, he's like,
my favorite facing timing is a lot. It's a commitment,

(41:26):
Like what if I see a FaceTime coming first time,
like that's a pocket FaceTime. They did not mean to
face You're like looking in the mirror, like if it's
it's not your birthday, I'm not FaceTime and yet what Yeah?
I am I alone in this? Are you FaceTime? The
majority of the people you don't even know? I would
FaceTime I FaceTime. Probably out of ten phone calls, seven

(41:49):
of them would be faced that. What do you do
when when when you travel, because you travel more than
probably any of us right now. Mostly text? Yeah, mostly text.
But I find that if it if it's at all
any kind of if it's any kind of intimate, like
if you if you're like having a situation, if you're dating,
trying to date somebody or whatever, the text is a

(42:11):
horrible way to go because everything's lost some translation and
and you have to put a phone call it. Yeah
you know what I mean? FaceTime? Do you FaceTime? Not much?
I don't. I don't face time much, um, just because
it's like kind of pain to FaceTime. I don't want
to have to look at the phone, you know, not
to mention forget about role. If you accidentally roll your

(42:32):
eye on FaceTime and you're done. If you make the
wrong facial expression, you're done. Um yeah, what you got buddy? Right? Also,
you know what else, if you're face timing, it's hard
for you to it's hard for you to text while
you're having a conversation. But you're not. That's the point

(42:55):
of that's the point of talking about. You got something
to do. Man, you gotta get back to people like yeah,
it's so so then just look at it like like
like I gotta go, I got stuff, I gotta I
gotta go. I'll talk to you soon. Okay, it goes.
If I'm FaceTime and it's no problem, you can be
sitting out. Does FaceTime have cause with people? Yeah? I

(43:16):
mean I'm going if I'm face If I'm FaceTime and
that girl, how can I text other ones? That's not
what I'm saying. That's comfortable. The guy has been married along.
That's the issue. That's that's me here and the rock stars.
The star says, if I'm FaceTime and how can I text?
So then the follow up question of that is do
you ever cross text? That is a fear? Isn't it

(43:40):
the cross text? But you could do that in any occasion.
I've done that for sure. I have. I have. I
had a teammate once that accidentally cross text and you're
talking about intimately, oh yeah, and accidentally and then blamed
it on me like I was a scapegoat, but never
told me and so then I got confronted about it
and I was like yeah, and then like I just

(44:03):
I just took a bullet. I took a bullet because
I figured something was up. And then like a couple
of minutes later, I was like, I saw my buddy.
I was like, what is this and he's like, oh,
I forgot to tell you. I'm like, dude, I tell me.
Have you guys seen the Fire Festival documentary so you

(44:24):
know that Ovin Sorry, you gotta watch it, but you
know the eavy On water guy. Come on, guys, I've
seen both documents, the Avian water. He was gonna, you
know what to get the water? Yes, So I was
trying to tell no. He walked into the hotel. I
was at a hotel. He walked in. I freaked out.

(44:45):
I got so excited as I started texting people like
friends and I texted, he's here, and I sent the
egg plan emoji with the water to the wrong person
to like a seven year old professional man. I started.
I started pouring. So you cross text anybody else in

(45:12):
our community, any listeners out there, If you have a
great story, that's what I want to get out. If
somebody out there has a fantastic story of cross texting,
send us an email or do you have one, Oh, Danielle,
I think a lot of women can relate to this.

(45:33):
But when you're texting a guy, let's say I'm just
I'm dating somebody, I'm texting that guy. I will text
my girlfriend to ask what I should respond with the guy. However,
it's happened so many times before where I've screenshot at
a conversation and sent it back to the guy instead

(45:54):
of sending it to my friend and he's like, why
did he just screenshot our conversation? Like hurt? But that
happens is so many people, is so many of my before.
So this is something I really want your honest opinions on.
And I know you're gonna want to give the politically
correct answer, but if you can give the real answer,

(46:15):
I have no interest in. So there's a girl I
follow on Instagram, so she doesn't shave at all, not
any not legs. For some reason, it's really hard for
me say the word armpit, but I'm just gonna say
it not armpit. That's a struggle to say that word
legs nothing. And what I think is interesting is any
time she shows that on her Instagram, women criticize it

(46:38):
or kind of make comments, and then other women come
on and defend her, and it's this big sort of thing.
So I'm wondering, as you, five men, what do you
really think? Like, what do you really think about that?
I think I mean, Gavin gave an example when I
was talking about lasering my eyebrows. If she ever gets

(46:59):
caught in a blizzard outside the Mall of America, she's
gonna need that hair for warmth. She's she's resourceful. Could
be a regional thing. Does she live in Canada? No?
Is that common in Canada? She lives in California. Because
I think women are going to email us at men

(47:19):
at I Heart radio dot com. No matter what you
guys say. Think you're gonna lose lose here because I
think they're gonna be irritated by you if you don't
say it's okay. But I want you to be honest.
I'll give it a shot. This is Rick speaking, Here's

(47:41):
the thing I think. Listen, I think everyone should do
what they want. Okay, if that's what she wants, and
if she is with someone or isn't with something and
they're fine with it, then that's fine. I mean, the
fact that she's posting it, she's inviting the comments. Okay,
me personally, I trim. I trim what I want to
trim because makes me more comfortable. So if she doesn't

(48:01):
want to trim, that's up to her. And if whoever
she's with, whoever her partner is, that's fine. But unfortunately,
once you go posting it, you're inviting the comments. So
I don't know what her responsive, she has problems with
all the comments, or if she's fighting back or clapping
back or whatever. But the thing is, once you do that,
you're you're kind of inviting it. So my my thought
on this is if it makes you feel good and

(48:25):
in your own world you're happy with it, then do it.
But if you're doing it and then putting it out
there and getting mad at people for commenting about it,
then that's on you. This is a topic for Professor
to graw In on. Thanks Doc. My opinion on this
um single Man's opinion the single guy, Well, I guess

(48:48):
I have a general question, which should be does she
get her hair cut on her head? And what does
her hairstyle look like? And it's just a short haircut,
has more to makeup. She's very, very pretty. It's just
that's something she doesn't want to do for whatever different reasons.

(49:10):
But as men, are you, I'm just gonna really cut
to the chase. Are you more attracted to a woman
that does? Or do you care? See you're all I
am more attracted to someone. Has anybody been with someone
who has not? This thing to me as a man

(49:31):
is to look at a woman who looks so opposite
of anything masculine. Um, that's what I find sexy. So
I already have body hair. I feel like I have
that part covered. But now she has no hair and
her whal body but a little patrick here that doesn't

(49:54):
grow on my face. I may say that's totally different
than me, but you know, for me, I'm not looking
for somebody who has any any esthetic at all reminiscent
of my looks, and I'm just looking for the absolute opposite.
I yeah, I agree, I have no interest in that.
That's my opinion. Um, body hair, not attractive, not physically

(50:20):
attractive to me in what I want to see on
my partner. My wife, um, looks very feminine and to
me that's very very attractive. Yeah, we're here to give opinions, right, Well, No,
here's the thing. They can have their own perspective. When
that first came up, you asked what we thought of it,

(50:41):
and so I said, if she wants to do what
she wants doing it. But if you're asking me some
point blank, if I find that attractive, I don't. So
I agree with Gavin Burton, and I think everybody here,
um yeah, it's like that's not what mentally, what I'm
accustomed to and what I think of, and therefore doesn't
trigger an attraction to me. So if someone were to
come to me and say, hey, look at me, I
haven't shaved my armpits and my legs, I say, well,

(51:02):
that's not that I don't. I'm sorry. That's great for you,
but I do not find that attractive. And I think
there's a lot of things that they may look at
us and be like, oh my god, like that guy's
got you know, short hair, or that guy has long
hair that's disgusting, or he has blonde hair or black hair,
no hair or chest hair as a societal and political

(51:23):
statement is the difference. No, not at all. And that's
what I think. Yeah, it's like that. It is no doubt,
it's an open window into but we don't know that.
And I think Amy is just kind of like, do
you guys like it or don't? That's that's how I'm interpreting.
We don't know that she's doing that. But she's posting
a photo on Instagram with her arm up showing the thing,
so she's not high, she's not not calling attention to it.

(51:47):
I think she wants her to be a conversation like this.
It's an old conversation. Has anybody ever been with somebody
that that was like that, that has not chosen to shave,
whether it's arm, pits or legs. When I was a teenager,
I went to a to a Woodstock reunion kind of thing,

(52:08):
you know, because I grew up near the original woodstock location,
right uh near Yaser's farm, And of course they'd have
these revivals every year, you know, celebrating woods the nineteen
sixty and anally stuff, so you know, all the hippies
and the faux hippies, and people who just like are
not hippies, but they would you know, the by ten
dollar ted eyed t shirt walk around right all there.

(52:31):
And of course there's a lot of girls there who
you know, we're teenage girls, twenty year olds, you know
what I'm saying. I was like sixteen at the time,
and there are a lot of girls in that that
age range. We just you know, we're that kind of
those kind of girls. You know, um, you know, fire
pits and drum circles and that whole thing. Everybody smelled

(52:51):
like but chuli, you know what I mean. And so
there are some cute girls out there. I mean I
had a ball um but you know, um, but I
can't say encountering that little underarm goate was a highlight
of my teenage years. You know. So you've been there, Yeah,

(53:15):
I seen it. I was about sixteen. Boy. So when
we've when we flipped back through your picture book, there's
not you in an underarm groate and like smiling. That's
that's looks like I have two heads of hair. Okay,
So we have a question from Tiffany and she is asking,
what are you insecure about on your body? Let too many,

(53:44):
too many muscles, on my on my being the perfect shape.
The twelfth ab muscle protrudes too much and it hurts
when I bend over. My abs are so pronounced. This
is everyone. His face was awesome. Really starts to hurt,

(54:04):
Like everyone, we get it. You work out, well, you start,
you started, buddy, what do you all dive in? Because
I mean, you know, what the hell, I'm forty five,
great hairs and sort of fat, and I don't really care.
I mean, the reality is great. Both thanks a lot

(54:27):
of appreciate that, you know what. I joked about him
since we got together. But like I, you know, I
am kind of self conscious about my chin and the
third one more so than the second one, but the
first one I really want to keep around. So the
fifth one kind of leads right down into like the
stomach area. It kind of all it's good, like when
you're in the sun and then you get up and

(54:48):
there's just like all the way across it's good. Yeah,
it's nice. But that's what we asked Rick for the
thing that he feels most sensitive about it, and we
started beating on the You guys are nice, that's it.
But I do think about you know, It's like I
kind of mentally beat myself up about working out and
and like not that I'm focusing on that particular area,

(55:10):
but I think as an overall mentality of saying, hey,
I need to go work out today, or you know
because of X, Y and Z, or I look in
the mirror shave or whatever, and it's like I need
to take care of that. Um, are you active right now?
Like are you? Are you very inactive? Actually you've seen
those elephant seals, right, That's kind of what I feel

(55:30):
like every once in a while when I look in
the mirror. But um, I know it's not the case.
Does it change if you become very active or somewhat
active somewhat? Yeah, yeah, somewhat. So then you have the
power to think about you know. And then you get
the other side of it where your wife or was like, hey,
well you know you can take care of that, and
it's like I may, I am taking care of it.
I'm going to the gym every day or or whatnot.

(55:51):
But she's like no, no, no, you can like go
and get it frozen off or sucked out or however
you want to do it, you know, And I'm like, no,
thank you, I'm not into that, hm, anybody else I'm
self conscious about a little bit of everything, you know,
maybe that's what you know. Like I'll give you an example, right, So,

(56:15):
uh so last week I went to the dentists and uh,
you know, I just I had going because I had
a feeling I needed done. And so they're doing that
and I'm like, hey, you don't mind whiting in my
teeth a little bit? They're like, no, certainly not. I
was like like three D shades lighter, like as white
as you can get these things, like like whiter than

(56:37):
my pupils, you know, and and like because I need
to do because I never go in the sun, so
I look like, you know, a ghost, you know. It's
like a cross between like a ghost and like somebody
with jaundice. So so like if I don't know, yeah,
so if I don't care if my teeth, you know, yeah,
then if they're not really white, then you can't tell

(56:59):
that look white at all, because you know, what they're
up against is like this, so instead of tanning, you're
just whiteing your teeth oddly, the sort of the translucent
color that I have. And so because I hate going
to the sun, you know, because when I was a kid,
I was a lifeguard and I had to sit on
that damn chair all day long. Man, And I said, man,
I mean I would, I would. I was like hoping

(57:20):
somebody would go under just so I could cool off,
you know. And so you know, so so in there,
you know, I was like, yeah, just make these things
as white as damn possibly, you know. And then they're like, okay,
we've gotten pretty wet. I was like, hey, why you're
in there? Um while you're in there, yeah, like yeah,
because you know that stuff in your mouth. I was like,

(57:41):
how long would it take you to straighten these things out?
You know? And they're like, well, what do you mean?
I said, well, you know, I had left, you know,
and uh And they're like, yeah, I mean we could.
We could do a couple of things, you know. I said,
maybe like some of those invisil line or I had
braces when I was a kid, but I didn't want
to wear the retainer because they looked too straight. I

(58:03):
looked like wimpy because they were too straight, and I
kind of wanted to get them a little crooked again.
But now they're like a little gangly, you know, so
now I want them straight as could be. You know
this is how man thing right. I was like, I
can't look if it looks too good, then I'm gonna
look like a pretty boy in this. Somebody will mess
with you and then you know, like get him a

(58:24):
little crooked, you know. And so now I'm an adult,
you know, I'm like, I mean, I want my tea
straightened out again. You know, why did I why did
I wear my retainer? Come play some hockey? But they
come play some hockey. Man. I lost my front four
te four times. See that? Do you have implants? They

(58:44):
broken half? So they just they broken half. They broken
half like vertically and half or like a cross like across.
How do you do that? The first time I lost them,
I was twenty three, just got high sticked, but just
a stick just took him right. I came to the bench,
pulled up my mouth guard front forward, just broken half.
And then after that then hockey players a really good

(59:05):
dentist um, and then they filled them me and they
put all like fake bottoms on them, and then after
that they got I lost them twice in two weeks.
One time one was of the puck, one was of
the stick from a teammate in practice, and then I
lost them one more time. So you wanna you wanna
you want to fix up your teeth? Buddy? The game
you keep playing after that happened, Yeah, it's actually yeah,

(59:27):
it's it's fine. You don't really feel it. Did you
find this the other halfs on the I know they're
just in your mouth guard. They come out in your
mouth guard, you pull your mouth guard out, and they're
just stuck in there. Did anybody make a really comment
you afterward? Like, hey man, you want to get some
dinner to night? Can you Some guys like hey, can
you open this here out there? Can open this spirit

(59:49):
for me? But yeah, you want you want some teeth adjustment,
my friend, come play some home all right, I can
do that. I can't do that, but it'll be good
for my mouth, I suppose. I mean, I uh, you
know when I started losing my hair, and when I
was like, I wasn't thrilled about it, but then uh,
it came to a point where it's like it's seen. Obviously,
it's there's a lot more common now. And once I

(01:00:10):
think I shaved it and just went with it, I
was fine. So that doesn't bother me anymore. But if
I don't keep myself. Like right now, I'm trying to
get back in the shape. But if I don't keep
myself in shape, the last place that that fixes itself
on my body if I'm working out is like my
side and my gut, my stomach. So if someone walks
up and hey, man, what's up and they hit you
on the side, I automatically I'll miss the next sentence

(01:00:33):
that they say because I'm all I'm thinking about is
oh man, they hit my side. It's not like where
I wanted to be. So I feel that though, like
if I don't. If I if I'm on vacation for
like a week, because I'm used to training like seven
days a week, and if I'm on vacation for like
a week, I feel soft and I hate it. Just

(01:00:53):
it's the grossest feeling to feel soft, which I don't like. Um,
So I get back train hard and I noticed a
change in my body too. You just feel a little softer.
It just looks a little different. But also for me,
it's um upper body. I'm a legs in My sport
is a legs and lung sport, but that's what you
train an explosive single leg power to be a hockey

(01:01:15):
player lungs to skate all day and you don't spend
a lot of time on upper body. So in relation
to my legs, my upper body are is small um
and weak compared to my in relation to my leg strength.
So for me, I'd like to develop more upper body.
I don't think I have a very big upper body
my self consci I think that's a half for oh

(01:01:40):
the half horse at the center? What did you call it?
A menatort cent centaur? I hit you on the side earlier,
sprain through things, impose your head. I love the Brooks,

(01:02:02):
just that the Brookshire works out like what eighteen at
twenty four hours a day goes. Yeah, when I go
on vacation, I get soft. It's like for what it's just.
But if you're if you're so like honestly as an athlete,
you're so in tune with But I don't know, maybe
it happens to what do you got? You gotta there?
I got a minute tour? This guy's going off the

(01:02:23):
cliff here? Can I see what you're you're talking about? This?
What do you call the is that the one center?
I don't see how either of these I don't okay, Well,
It's like, yeah, yeah, that is Brooks. That's Brooks on vacations.

(01:02:50):
Can we post on our Instagram a picture of a
centaur with Brooks's face? Oh, I'm sure if somebody in
our community will do it. Oh God, here they come.
I just want to be honest here. Um. You know,
I we just shared a little bit about what we
were self conscious about, and you know, obviously working out
and doing physical exercise. You know, we were talking about

(01:03:11):
my chin and being forty five and chins. Excuse me,
thank you Ryan. Um. But what I wanted to know
really from you guys and some of our listeners was
what motivates you to to get to the gym, be
on time, get there every time, you know, work your
upper body Brooks? Um, you know what is the motivating

(01:03:33):
factor when you've already played a sport, when you already
have the kids and you're you're already out on too.
You know, you come back from a from a concert
or whatnot, Gavin, you know, are you gonna go work
out afterwards or you're gonna work out the next morning
or you know? Right, So I'm curious to know what
the motivating factors are to do to to do that
I that's probably the question I get asked the most

(01:03:55):
in my life is how do you stay motivated and
what motivates you? Um? Honestly, for me, it's well, it's
been about athletics. My whole life was about Okay, I
want to become the best hockey player I possibly can be.
That that was my whole goal. So I trained sports
specific What in the gym directly translates to on ice peak,

(01:04:16):
on ice performance. That was my motivating factor for thirty
some years. Um. Now it's about I want to compete
in CrossFit. But um so that's why I'm working on
other things that are not sports specifically developing more upper
body power. Um. But for me, if I don't work out,
if I don't train like my I turned my whole

(01:04:36):
you guys probably seen on my Instagram if you follow me,
my whole garage is a gym. It's my home Jim Heaven, um,
and I'll train. I'll bounce back and forth in and
out of that from eight to five every day. Um.
I have a workout app, open gym training programs if
you guys wanna, if you need something to train at
home or at your gym. Um, this is my passion
in life. This is something that fulfills me. And honestly,

(01:05:00):
my head would blow off if I didn't train in
a day or two days. Like, I just have so
much energy I need to get out, and I think
if I didn't do that, It's one it's fulfilling for me.
I can do it by myself for four or five
six hours. You can probably sing or write or like
music by yourself all day, right, So this is fulfilling
for me. So it's it's sort of a gift in

(01:05:22):
that regard um. But also I think I would go
crazy if I didn't get that energy out. I think
my wife would probably divorce me in a week if
I wasn't able to work out like for me right now.
I mean, I was doing waterpool for a long time,
and they're a couple of years ago. I was training
pretty hard for a World Championship thing and Hungary and
and we went and did all that, and ever since then,
I've just been and we remodeled our house or whatnot.

(01:05:43):
But I've just been very kind of stagnant and just been,
you know, and almost enjoying it to the fact where
I'm like, you know what, I don't have to do
that today? Like cool, Like I'm gonna stay home and
enjoy my coffee or whatever, not go to the gym
at six o'clock or go swim at five am. Um.
And now what I'm really struggling with is getting on
that horse, and without forcing myself, I think I can

(01:06:03):
help you here. So and for our listeners too, because
this is so if if working what would on a
scale of one to ten, what would working out or
right now be to you? A three? Four? Like how
excited would you be to do it? Or like what
would so you're three? So a lot of a lot

(01:06:25):
of people listening to this probably are a three. So my,
how we how do we get this? Because if something's
attend to you, you're like, I want to do that.
That's so attractive, that's so that's so much fun to me.
So if training for you right now is a three, well,
if we add great music, that might make it a four.
If you do it outside in the sun here in California,
might be a five or six. If you do it

(01:06:47):
with a good friend, might be a seven. If the
gym is really close to your house, maybe that's an eight.
If you put a challenge to it, Hey, I'm gonna do.
I want to be able to do a five k
or a half marathon by July or August. Well, now
you have a purpose to it, and you're like, I'm
gonna raise money. Can can you sponsor me to do this?

(01:07:08):
Now you have a purpose. Now maybe there's a motivation
outside of yourself. Now maybe it's a nine or a
ten and you're like, damn right, I'm going to do this.
Could be you want to be healthy, you want to
live to your ninety years old, to be around for
your grandkids. That could be a motivation. But there's many
ways to turn it from a three to a ten,
and I would look at some of those ways for
our listeners. What are those ways in your life? Who
are those people in your life that can help elevate

(01:07:31):
it so that it's something that you gravitate towards versus
something you resist against. Tell you a funny story about
working out in good music. So I try and work
out as much as i can, because one, I get
embarrassed if I'm out of shape. But also what you
were saying earlier books for for me, part of what
I do is about quick thinking and stuff like that.

(01:07:52):
And if I'm out of shape and stuff I have.
My I just get sluggish and my thinking slows down,
and you know, it doesn't work. So I started working out.
I was like, okay, there, I want to try and
work out every day, and I can't do. I don't
have a time between work and the kids and everything
to do so much every day. So I bought one
of those Peloton bikes, and I was like, at the
very least, I'll do a ride every day, which I

(01:08:12):
did last night before we left to come here. I
hadn't done it yet. So I did a ride at
like ten o'clock at night, and I got up and
I had to catch a flight this morning. But I
did a ride this morning. But as I was riding
this morning, I'm doing this thing, it's like, all right,
I gotta get up to Oakland. And so I don't
know if you know Peloton. There's a screen there and
it's almost like you're in a live class and the
instructors talking and stuff like that. Sometimes they are alive too,

(01:08:33):
but instructors like, all right, this next one's really gonna
knock your socks off. She goes. I just love Gavin
Degra's voice. Yeah, And so listen if this isn't a sign,
that's the part where I would have turned that screen off. Dude.
This has been another This has been a powerful episode.

(01:08:55):
I think this is our best episode. This is one
of the top two episodes. That's one of the top
two we've ever done, certainly the most recent one. Um
but gavic Well said, I'm about at jokes, buddy, just
wrap us, get me up, great man. Hey, well, listen, fellas.
It's an honorably here to be honest with you. After

(01:09:18):
meeting you, guys, I walked in. I thought it was
gonna suck, but she surprised me, so thanks for having me. Hey, guys,
it's Brooks and one last thing before you take off.
We want to know your thoughts, feedback, insights, and questions
for us on this show. Send us an email at
men at I Heart radio dot com and follow along

(01:09:40):
with us on Instagram at how Men Think podcast and
we'll see you back right here next week for the
next episode.