Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Timothy Shamalamadinga. I believe he's Jewish New Yorker, went to
LaGuardia High School next door to the high school that
I graduated from, Martin Luther King High School. But he's
been doing press, He's been on ESPN giving college score predictions,
he's giving hip hop interviews, and he's just fun, totally
(00:24):
comfortable with himself, totally comfortable in his skin, totally comfortable
being a movie star. Doesn't take himself too seriously, but
also can talk about things in a very serious way.
He seems like a really good kid, this shamalamading Doung.
And I also feel like, based on some of his interviews,
(00:46):
shamala Ma Dingung must listen to the im Rapper Stereo
podcast because I heard him talking about sick Fox and
I heard him saying Shamalamadingung. Not that no one ever
called him Shamalama ding Dong in his life, because I
was thinking I invented Shamalama ding Dong so and then
I was thinking, no, if you're Timothy Shamalay, other people
(01:09):
probably has said Shamalama ding Dong. Boom have no fear
of the Iron rap Port Stereo podcast is here BIGINNI
Boom have no fear that I Am Rapaport Stereo Podcast
is in the place to be Today's banging, brand new
(01:32):
I Am rap Report Stereo Podcast. Timothy Shamalama ding Dong.
Timothy Shama Lay is defining articulating what it means to
be a movie star on a list movie star in
twenty twenty four and beyond, and does Timothy Shamalama ding
(01:53):
Dong listen to the Iron rap Port Stereo Pocket Plus.
Are we having an NFL overload? There was games on Christmas,
Christmas is on a Wednesday. We all love the NFL,
but is enough enough? And there are more sightings of
alleged UFOs over the Bronx. Are UFOs flying over the BX?
(02:15):
All that and more on a high flying, hard hitting
holiday Iron rap Ports Stereo Podcast coming up right now,
Myles Jordan A Ki The Bleach Brothers aka the Dust
brother Start this puppy with Trump, real nice signey. Start
this puppy of a Trump, real lowd but most importantly,
start this puppy off with something real funcky. This is
the im Rapperport Stereo Pucks. By next fucking go Baby Boom,
(02:43):
have no fear of the Iron rap Port Stereo Podcast
is here, Biggity Boom, have no fear. The im Rapoport
Stereo podcast is in the place to be. Huh. Welcome
to the Iron Dome of Disruption. Welcome to the Ziggity
Zone of derupt. My name is Michael Rapperport aka the
Inflamed Ashkenazi aka the Sultan of Sniff aka the Raging
(03:09):
Bullshitter a k a. The Gringo Man Dingle aka mister
New York Boom. Iron rap Port Stereo Podcasts coming live
and direct from the gloom Toumbe gloom Tomb gloom Tube
version tray, the third iteration of the gloom Tomb. Of course,
(03:31):
the o G gloom Tombe still exists gloom Tube number two,
no moss, but the gloom Tune number three is in
the place to be. This is the Iron rap Port
Stereo Podcasts. Hope everybody's feeling real good. Hope everybody's feeling
really safe. Hope everybody is feeling really sane. Iron rap
Port Stereo podcast coming live and diggity direct. And as
(03:57):
you could see, we are in the broadcasting business live
looking real good. One of the things I'm very very
concerned about when we are broadcasting the im rapp Per
Stereo podcast is I hate lint. I like og lint
(04:17):
brushes and I hate lint. I know a Cameron, Cameron
and Mace. They have their show, it is what it is.
Their show's dope and Cameron's always brushing his hair. I'm
gonna always be brushing off the lint because when you
have a black shirt on, I can't stand when I
see myself and there's lint. And I like the og
(04:40):
I don't like the tape lint brush. I like the
og lint brush. Hope everybody's having a good holiday, I
really do. Hope everybody is finding time to relax. Hope
everybody is finding time to chill. Hope everybody is, you know,
enjoying their family. Hope your family is not driving you
no nuts. Hope you're eating, Hope you are sleeping, and
(05:04):
I hope you are rinsing and repeating doing it all.
I'm rap Port Stereo podcast is in the place to be.
I would be remissed if I didn't tell you that
I have shows booked in February at the American Comedy
Co February sixth, seventh, and eighth and I'll be in Ihladelphi, Philadelphia,
(05:28):
Valentine's Day at the Filmore, Philadelphia at the Fillmore on
the fourteenth, Philadelphia at the Fillmore on the fourteenth, And
I got a bunch of other shows up. All tickets,
all information is available at Michael Rapaportcomedy dot com Michael
Rapportcomedy dot com. But I'm performing in San Diego. I
love that club. That's a dope club, that's a that's
(05:50):
like a club environment. People are right in front of you,
you could feel them, they could feel you. And I've
had great shows at the American Comedy Club in San Diego.
So I'll be there the sixth, seventh, and eighth, And
like I said, Valentine's Day illadelf Philadelphia on the fourteenth. Anyway,
(06:12):
I am Rapport Stereal podcast. What can I say. I'm
waiting to hear what the Young Shooter has to say
about the new Bob Dylan Timothy Shamalama ding Dong movie
Timothy Shamalama ding Dong is reinventing, not reinventing. He's inventing.
He is inventing. He is showing the world what it
(06:38):
means to be a modern day movie star, a movie
star in twenty twenty four. The days of the koi shy, unavailable,
unrelatable movie star are done. You must get out there
and sell. Timothy Shamalama ding Dong. I think he's twenty
(06:59):
five four years old, twenty five years old, great actor,
good looking kid. This Shamolama ding Dong good. I don't
know whether to fuck him or fight him. Timo, that's
what they call him, Timo. The ladies call him t Mac.
No disrespect to the great Tracy McGrady, the og t Mac.
(07:21):
But Timo, Timothy Shamalama ding Dong is an A list star,
blossoming and showing and writing the handbook on what it
means to be a movie star in twenty twenty four
and beyond. And I say this because you can't not
(07:43):
do press. Leonardo DiCaprio has done so little press, and
he's earned it. He came from a different era. Even
Ryan Gosling, he's a little bit more accessible than Leonardo,
But Leonardo came from that, you know, Marlon Brando, which
came to Robert de Niro, which came to Sean pen
which you know, we don't do talk shows, you know,
(08:04):
me and you see me when you see me on screen,
that's no longer gonna work. And Timothy Shamalama ding Dong
grew up in the social media age, and he is
embracing social media to sell his movie, The Bob Dylan
Film A Complete Unknown, which somehow Someway is attempting to
make Bob Dylan chic and cool in twenty twenty four. Personally,
(08:28):
I think it's impossible. No disrespect to Bob Dylan, to
the great James Mangold, who I worked with in Copland.
I don't think even Timothy Shamalama ding Dong will be
able to make Bob Dylan cool or chic in twenty
twenty four because I think that Timothy shamalamading Dong is
more cool. He's certainly better looking, he's cuter, he's more likable,
(08:53):
he's more relatable than Bob Dylan ever was, or ever
will be. No disrespect to Bob, disrespect to a Bob
Dylan who's Jewish. Timothy shamalamadinga I believe he's Jewish. New
Yorker went to LaGuardia High School next door to the
high school that I graduated from, Martin Luther King High school,
(09:16):
but he's been doing press, he's been on ESPN giving
college score predictions, he's giving hip hop interviews, and he's
just fun, totally comfortable with himself, totally comfortable in his skin,
totally comfortable being a movie star, doesn't take himself too seriously,
(09:37):
but also can talk about things in a very serious way.
He seems like a really good kid, this Shamalama ding Doung.
And I also feel like, based on some his interviews,
Shamalamadingung must listen to the im Rappor Stereo podcast because
I heard him talking about Sick Fox and I heard
him saying Shamalama ding dong, not that no one ever
(10:01):
called him Shamalama ding dong in his life, because I
was thinking I invented Shamalama ding dong so and then
I was thinking, no, if you're Timothy Shamalay, other people
probably has said Shamalama ding dong to you. But Miles
Jordan's played the clip of Timothy Shamalay quoting what I
think is I am rap Porty Stereo podcast. Sick fucks
(10:22):
Eric Foley? Fuck?
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Is Eric Foley?
Speaker 1 (10:24):
You played Eric Foley a dead body? Oh shit?
Speaker 2 (10:29):
And that's true, shit, Eric, that was my first gig,
Law and Order with Anthony Anderson and Jeremy cisdofans dot com.
Poor Eric, Hey, Yeah, Eric Foley got murdered. You know,
I got murdered a lot as a child, ten year old,
eleven year old tweveny thirty. I think there was something
about the sick fucks in New York casting that thought
(10:50):
this kid would look get slaughtered.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
There you have it. You you answered the question, do
you guys think Timothy Shamalay is listening to the Iron
rap Port stereo pockets? I wouldn't be surprised. Who doesn't
listen to the That's really the question is who doesn't?
What movie stars, modern day, past day or present don't
(11:14):
listen to the Iron rap Port stereo Pockets? But I
would love to talk to Shamalay because he loves acting,
he loves the Knicks, and apparently allegedly he used to
play ball. Apparently allegedly he used to play ball, And
a word on the street is that he's got game.
You know, for an actor, he's got game. Anyway, I'm
(11:36):
waiting for the Shooter, Young Shooter Dean Collins to give
his full review of the Bob Dylan film A Complete Unknown, which,
like I said, I'll watch it when it comes out
on video, but I unfortunately, I'm not going to the theater.
Even though I love James Mangold and he did the
Ford Versus Ferrari. He of course did Copland, he did
(11:58):
the incredible fucking Walk the Line with Joaquin Phoenix who
destroyed playing Johnny Cash. He was incredible. Reese Witherspoon, they
were excellent in that. But I will not be going
to see that movie in the theaters because I just not.
(12:18):
I'm just unfortunately, I'm not. I'm one of those people.
It sucks. It sucks. But Shamalama ding Dong is really
making a good presentation for going to see that. I
just hope that people don't watch him on social media
more than they watch his movies, particularly this one, which
again he's supposed to be great, and it also is
(12:39):
supposed to be a great film podcast. I'll tell you what,
I've kind of had enough of. Not that I've had enough,
(13:01):
but I'm overwhelmed with the NFL. I am overran overwhelmed
with the NFL. NFL used to be Sundays, you get
your football Monday you get your Monday night game, and
then occasionally you get a Thursday night game, and then
they made Thursday all day, every day Thursday Night Football,
and those games, historically they stink. And then you'd get
(13:25):
a Thursday game during Thanksgiving, and if it lined up correctly,
you get a game on Christmas, but only if it
lined up correctly. Those days are over, and let's not
forget that the NFL is an extremely violent sport. I
remember the way my body used to feel when I
(13:47):
played football up until I was thirteen. I played tackle
football up until I was thirteen, and my body would ache.
And I say, young boy, I'm talking about like it
would ache on on Sunday we played the game Saturday,
it would ach on Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. You'd start
to feel like yourself. We're talking about non football playing
football players. Can you imagine how an NFL offensive lineman,
(14:12):
a running back, a wide receiver, a linebacker's body feels.
And you're shortening the amount of days that they have
rest to stuff games almost five days a week. This
past week, I mean it was insane. You had game Saturday,
(14:33):
you had games Sunday, you had games Monday, and then
you had to have a game during Christmas and people,
it's just it's a lot. And I'm a diehard football fan.
I love watching the games. But you got the games
all over the place, and they weren't that good. The
games actually sucked on Christmas, and you got Beyonce performing.
(14:56):
She's coming out on white horses doing songs. I never
heard them. Not that I'm a big Beyonce fan. I mean,
I don't want any beef with the with the with
the Beehive, the Beyonce fans. Shit, I don't know who's worse.
The Ariana Grande fans, the Lady Goga fans, the Swifties
(15:17):
they've proven themselves former noble, or the Beyonce fans, the
Swifties and the Beehive. I don't want smoke with the
Swifties or the Beehive. Said it once, said it many times.
I once took on the Grande's, the Grandets, whatever the
fuck Ariana grands fan. They came after me, and they
(15:38):
came after me hard. I sniffed around a beef with
Janet Jackson fans, and these fucking lunatics. They pushed and
they pushed, and they still they'll still pop up. I
remember what you said about Janet. I'm like, I'll still
say it again. She hasn't had a song of relevance
in thirty years. No disrespect, I love jan I work
(16:00):
with Janet. Just because you're a sick Janet Jackson fan
doesn't mean you have more respect or adoration than I do.
You're just a sick Oh. The reality is she hasn't
been popping in twenty something years. Again, she might not
want to be popping. She might be done trying to
(16:21):
pop in twenty twenty five. But to be clear, I
don't want any smoke with Beyonce fans, the Beehive or
the Swifties. But I will say I watched her on Netflix,
which is a paint I love. Everybody loves Netflix. Everybody
loves Netflix. Netflix and Chill, Murder Doc and Chill. We
(16:41):
all love Atypical. I am. Currently they are streaming Atypical
on Netflix. They're also streaming the entire series of prison Break.
I believe I'm in season four or season five prison Break,
Agent don Self. Every time I go through customs, someone
(17:02):
will say prison Break and I go special Agent don Self, like,
I know what you do, and you know what I
do so love. I love Netflix. I love working for Netflix.
I'm a subscriber, YadA, YadA, YadA. I'm not sure they
have the live event situation all figured out. I was
(17:24):
watching these Steelers play, and you're turning the game on,
and it's like, do you want to watch from the beginning,
and it's taking you to the beginning, and at one
point I thought I was caught up, and then I'm
getting alerts on my phone that the score is different
than what I'm watching. And then I turn on the
Ravens game and again it's like, do you want to watch?
(17:45):
I just I want to be able to turn on
the game and be at the beginning of the game.
And if I want to go backwards, cool, But when
you turn on a sporting event, you want to go
right to where it is. If it's the third quarter, Netflix,
we want the third or seven minutes and twenty three
seconds left in the third quarter. We don't want to
have to dip and die. It's already a paint in
(18:07):
the ass. It's already a paint in the ass that
we have different sports on different apps. It's even more
of a pain in the ass that we now have
NFL on Amazon we have NFL on Netflix. We're gonna
soon have NFL A Sunday is gonna be spread out
all over the place. You can't just click click. You
(18:28):
gotta click. You gotta click click, click, and then micro
apper once you get another TV. I don't want I
don't I don't want another TV. I don't want to
watch the game on my computer and watch the game
on the TV. I don't want to watch the game
on the computer and the game on the on the phone.
I want to be able to watch the game while
I'm watching the game, and I want to be able
to click the channel and go right to the real
(18:49):
time part of the game. I don't want to do
you want to sit there and watch the pregame? Why
would I want to watch the pregame? Pregame ain't that important.
Nobody gives a fuck about the We want to watch
the game. It's the third court wedding into playoff time.
Go fuk about what Kay Adams and them are talking about.
But like I said, you know, we had Beyonce two
(19:11):
bad football games, and just give me a break, give
us all a break. We have to we have to
figure this out. It's too much. There's so much competitive,
great football going on. I have been knocked out of
both of my fantasy football leagues and it was painful.
It hurt. It hurt to see other people participating while
(19:35):
I'm on the sidelines. I don't even know who is
participating for the Stern Show Fantasy Football Championship. I could
care less. I could care less. And in my money
league it was I took a beating in my money league.
I took a beating in my money league. But there's
(19:59):
there's two too many sports on too many different apps,
and it is going to take away from the viewing experience.
It's already taken away from the viewing experience, and you're
worried about ratings and this, that and the third. You
got Beyonce on one game, you got Christmas NBA games
on ESPN and ABC. It's just all over the place.
(20:21):
It's all over the place. And you know, everybody's betting,
which is great. And obviously the people that are going
to watch the games the closest are people who have
money on the games. Let me tell you something, if
you got money on the game, you don't give a
shit about the apps. You'll figure it out. But the
majority of people just want to watch the ball game.
I just want to watch Lamar Jackson, just want to
watch Patrick Mahoon boy. I just want to watch the
(20:44):
Steelers crash and burn. I want to watch it all.
But like I said, on Christmas Day, you had NFL
and you had NBA, and Christmas was on a Wednesday.
I'm like, what the fuck is going on Wednesday night football?
I don't care if he got Beyonce, no disrespect or not.
(21:07):
Normally Christmas is for the NBA and even Lebron James,
the great Lebron James, Who's yo. I don't know who
they were playing, maybe with Sacramento. He caught the ball
on the post, spun and then dunked it on a
motherfucker with two wins. I'm like this, this is a
(21:28):
forty year old man doing that shit. And we're not
at the rec League. We're in the NBA. He caught
the ball in the post, drop stepped like James Worthy
in his prime. James Worthy had one of the ill
has drop steps ever caught the ball. I think he
a team shaked James Worthy drops him and then gammed
(21:49):
it on somebody at forty. But he said after the
game's yo, I love the NFL, but Christmas is our day? Like,
what are we trying to do here? Beyonce again, no
disrespect to the beehive. What else is going on? Uh?
(22:24):
The UFOs, the unidentified flying objects, they're all over the place.
They got them all over the place. Everybody's freaking out. Now.
They got him in the Bronx, they got him in
New York City. They were allegedly spotted over Central Park.
(22:45):
Everybody's freaking out. Nobody's really talking about it. Nobody's giving
any the answers on where and what and who is
manning these UFOs. People are saying there's drones. People are
saying there military said it once, I've said it many times.
(23:05):
I don't believe in UFOs. It's twenty twenty five. For
all intentsive purposes, it's twenty twenty five. You're in a UFO.
You're actually in a UFO. Show yourself, you probably got weapons.
Show yourself. I was just in Miami. I'm at the
(23:28):
beach looking out into the water. I'm like, this is
a perfect this is a perfect spot for some unidentified
flying oddy of some spacemen to come down in a
flying saucer on some et shit show themselves. First of all,
women walking around thong bikinis all over the place down
(23:50):
there in Miami. Don't you want to see? Don't you
want to get out of your your little flying saucer
and see what's popping in Miami? Pose yourselves. They say
they're smarter than everybody down here on planet Earth. They're
more advanced than everybody down here on planet Earth. They
should certainly be able to show themselves without problem, without
(24:14):
a problem. O. I don't believe it until I see it.
It's twenty twenty five, and I said, I've seen the
crup dusting, I've seen all the videotape. What I haven't
seen is one of these little green cock sunkers get
out of their flying saucer and show us what they got,
show us what they We got a lot of shit
(24:36):
going on down here. We got Lebron James Taylor Swift,
we got Timothy Shamalama Ding Dong, We got all kinds
of things down here of interest. Kendrick Lamar, the Kendrick Lamoar,
Drake Beef's going on. We got Jake Paul versus Mike Tyson,
all sorts of exciting shit. We had an incredible presidential election.
(25:03):
Show us what the fuck you got, your little green
unidentified flying object, little fucker's you. I don't think there's
been any ufoes over Jersey. I don't care what they're
screaming out in the Bronx about you. These are drones now, now,
these are drone Now. People are playing games they know like, oh,
(25:26):
you can make it on America's next Top video. You
can make it on you know, one of these shows.
You get on TMZ, your videotape, your friend doing the drone,
you do the lights, you put some special. I need
to see it, Okay, I need to see it. Maybe
maybe they are real and they're like watching Earth like
(25:47):
it's a reality TV show. Who the fuck knows, But
I need to see it to believe it. Personally, I
don't think it's real. I don't believe in UFOs. I
don't believe in spells, spooks, vampires. I don't believe in
any of that shit. I don't believe in any of
that shit. I need to see it to believe it. Enough,
(26:09):
enough is enough. If you're really really about that life,
show us what you got, Show us what you got
your little flying saucer UFO green Goblin close encounter with
the third kind ass motherfuckers. We need to see you
(26:30):
come down here. You're so smart, you're so advanced, you're
so powerful, you should be able to, you know, show
yourself and then fly off to wherever the fuck you're from.
Where you're from, Pluto, Saturn, Mars. Nobody knows. Nobody knows
because it's not true. It is actually not true. So
(26:50):
much is going on in the Middle East during Hanukkah.
We're almost at four hundred and fifty days since October seventh,
and the hostages, seven of whom are American. There are
(27:14):
seven American hostages. Seven Americans are still in Gaza, seven
American hostages. There are five five men over eighty years
old in Gaza. There are ten women in Gaza. The
entire Bebis family is still there. And they are saying, now,
(27:38):
you know, there's so much talk about a hostage deal,
hostage deal, hostage deal, and Hamas is saying now that
the possibility of a hostage deal is less than it
was a couple of days ago. They have no accounting,
they have no actual accurate accounting and location and verification
(28:00):
of what hostages are alive. They have no accurate accounting,
verification of what hostages are actually alive. Yet Yet, and still,
every single time there is an airstrike from Israel, they
know exactly how many people are dead. They know exactly
(28:25):
how many journalists are dead. They know exactly how many men,
women and children are dead. They know exactly how many
people are dealing with starvation. Yet they have no accounting
for the hostages that they took, that they kidnapped, that
they stole fifteen months ago. When five journalists get shot
(28:55):
and killed, they have that information right away. And it
always turns out that the journalists terms. Let me make
sure we all understand journalists ain't journalists. Doctors ain't doctors,
teachers ain't teachers. Civilians ain't just civilians. In Gaza, nothing
is what it seems to be. In Gaza, everything is
(29:17):
a fucking lie. The greatest day in the history of
Gaza was October seventh. That's why they celebrated like they
won the NBA title. That's why they celebrated like they
won the Super Bowl. They murdered, they raped, they burnt,
they kidnapped people on October seventh, and four hundred and
(29:40):
fifty days later, you don't have an accurate accounting of
where the people are unfucking believable. And to add insult
to even more injuries. This morning, and eighty three year
old Holocaust survivor, an eighty three year old woman was
stabbed in cold blood. And eighty three year old woman
(30:02):
was stabbed to death in cold blood by some savage animal,
some savage animal while she was leaving her retirement home.
And I want to be clear that this person is
not a martyr. I want I want this this person's
mother and father. I want this person's person. I want
(30:27):
this animal, this savage, this mutant, this demon. I want
your parents to understand. If they're listening, and I don't
know why they wouldn't be listening. Everybody listens to the
Iron rapp Per stereo podcast. Your son is not a martyr.
Your son is not a hero. He's a waste of life,
A waste of life. You stab to death in cold blood,
(30:49):
in broad daylight, an eighty three year old woman. You
know how violent that is. You know, sick and twisted
and hateful you have to be to do that. Anyway,
I'm praying for these people. I am praying for the
release of these hostages. Every single day anyway. Miles Jordan
(31:13):
ak The Bleach Brothers aka The Dust Brothers. I'm gonna
get out of here. I really hope everybody's having a
great holiday. Make sure you stay safe, make sure you
stay sane, make sure you stay disruptive. I'm coming to
San Diego in February the sixth, seventh, and eighth of February.
I'll be in Philadelphia Philadelphi the fourteenth, February fourteenth. I'll
(31:37):
be in Stanford in February, Stanford, Connecticut at the American
Comedy Club the twenty eighth, first and second. Come see
me Live. All tickets, all informations available at Michael rappaport
coomedy dot com. Telling Friend to telling friend about the
world's most disruptive podcast. Miles Joan aka The Bleach Brothers
AK The Dignity Dust Brothers. Take me out of it something
(31:58):
real nice. Take me out of it with something real loud,
but most importantly, take me out it with something real
funk and say, I am rap ports the real punk is.
I'm out