Scooters, Scrapes & Syphoned Gas: A Dominican Reality Check

What happens when a chill scooter ride in paradise turns into a full-body skid on a busy Dominican street? On this episode of IDKMYDE, B Daht breaks down the crash, the unexpected kindness (and gasoline), plus 3 Useless Facts about scooters, traffic laws, and helmet habits in the DR that might make you think twice before hopping on two wheels abroad.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
I was hat and didn't know it alls. Welcome back
to I didn't know. Maybe you didn't either, the podcast
where the facts are random, the lessons are real, and
your host is currently walking around like an old man
in church shoes. Two size is too small. I'm beat
I and today we're talking scooters in the Dominican Republic. Yeah, scooters,

(00:24):
the tiny motorcycles of bad decisions. Now, before I get
into how I became the human swiffer on a dr street,
let me hit you with three of the most useless
facts you'll never need a day in life about scooters
in the dr. Your first random fact, the Dominican Republic
has one of the highest traffic accident rates in the Caribbean.

(00:44):
I'm talking Mario Kart on Rainbow Road levels of danger.
Folks drive like stop signs or decorations, and tourists we
pull up thinking we're on vacation. Nah, bra, you just
step into the fast and the frugal. Your second useless fact.
Over sixty percent of those crashes involve scooters and motorcycles,
which makes sense because they're everywhere.

Speaker 2 (01:06):
Folks rods scooters.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
With no helmet, one hand, three passengers and a mattress
on their back.

Speaker 2 (01:11):
This's a fact.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
I saw a whole family of six on one scooter
all at the same time. Meanwhile I'm on my little rental, like,
how do you start this again? And your third useless fact,
helmets are required by law, but people wear them like
seat belts in the nineties, only when they feel like it.
Sometimes folks rock them just to get past the police checkpoint,

(01:32):
then take them right back off like they hot. And
when crashes happen without that helmet, it's usually not just bruises,
its funerals.

Speaker 2 (01:41):
So those have been your three useless facts.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
The Dominican Republic has one of the highest traffic accident
rates in the Caribbean. Over sixty percent of road accidents
they're involve motorbikes and scooters. And while helmets are legally required,
enforcement is well kind of optional. So now that we
got your three ustas facts done, question, how did I
go from renting scooters with my friends to ending up

(02:07):
in the er on the resort. I didn't know. I
didn't know.

Speaker 2 (02:14):
I didn't know. I didn't know. I didn't I didn't know.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
I didn't know.

Speaker 2 (02:20):
I didn't know.

Speaker 1 (02:22):
Tobom I'm in the dr minding my business, just trying
to feel the breeze. Forget about American stressors. My bro
Chuck says, look, I can rent us scooters for the
day thirty five dollars. I said, I'm with it. No training,
no tutorial, just vibes and bad judgment.

Speaker 2 (02:38):
Now.

Speaker 1 (02:38):
The first day I had the baby scooter because I
knew that I wasn't well versed on riding scooters. But
after a full day of scooter riding to the beaches,
to the mountains, all through the neighborhoods, in and out
of traffic on the highway, by day two I said,
I'm ready onus that I'm ready, give me the good one.
I want the one that looked like a motorcycle. And
we took off of day two. But day two we

(03:00):
want it to be a little bit more adventurous. So
instead of just riding around, put the playa checking out
the beaches and the scenery there. My partner Tevin was
in Santiago. I said, how far is that? Our God said,
forty minutes on the scooters. I said, let's do it.
So me, Chuck, money Bag Mafia, and Marky Mark follow
our guide over to Santiago, Dominican Republic. Day two was

(03:23):
way more crazy than Day one. In and out of traffic,
U turns around buses, all through the neighborhoods, wapping up.

Speaker 2 (03:30):
Kids and strangers. It was a vibe.

Speaker 1 (03:32):
We're five minutes out from Santiago Beach at a stoplight,
and the stoplight is counting down four, three, two. Everybody's
reving up their engines. When I look ahead of me,
it's nothing but asphalt as far as I can see.
We about to race. I hear the engines reving up.
When that joint got the zero, everybody took off. I'm

(03:55):
looking left, I'm looking right. I'm looking left, I'm looking right.
What I'm not doing is looking right in front of me.
When I finally do, I see a speed bump less
than five yards away. I immediately know I have to
slow down, but instead of me hitting the left back break,
I hit the right front brake immediately tosses me twenty.

Speaker 2 (04:17):
Yards in the air. That's when I was in the
arms of an angel.

Speaker 1 (04:22):
Hit the ground, rolled four or five times up under
and on top of the bike, rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling,
and came to a complete stop. The adrenaline the embarrassment
made me hop up immediately I ran straight to the bike.
I did not want to be stuck in the dr
paying for a scooter for the next three years. Man.
I slid across that pavement like I was trying to

(04:43):
audition for Dominicans. Got talent on a busy street, y'all
people everywhere, crowded on both sides.

Speaker 2 (04:49):
Me, I'm the halftime show.

Speaker 1 (04:52):
But yo, the Dominican people, they jumped in like I
was their cousin. They ain't ask no questions, they ain't
pull out no cell phones, they ain't say whose man
is this?

Speaker 2 (05:00):
Nah?

Speaker 1 (05:01):
They all immediately started helping people. Was driving up, brother,
are you okay? No hesitation, no cloud chasing, just real
human kindness. Now contrast that with the three Americans that
I came with.

Speaker 2 (05:14):
What were they doing?

Speaker 1 (05:15):
Chuck Money, bag Mark, all got their phones out, cameras rolling,
trying to get that gone viral and preth apply of content.
I'm over here bleeding out like I'm in a Dominican
tele novella, and they trying to turn it into a
TikTok trend. But wait, it gets better. The Dominican dudes
they treated my wounds with gasoline, Yes, gasoline. They literally

(05:38):
siphon gas out of my scooter, poured it into a
used water bottle and poured it on my open wounds.
I thought I was about to turn into a damn transformer.
I said, gasolene. They said, he goody, goody, kill the bacteria.
I said, it's killing me. Now, listen. I respect the culture,
I really do. But it felt like they were baptizing
my kneecaps in holy fire, I thought, But I saw Moses,

(06:01):
my knees and elbows is out there sizzling like a
carnal sada. And I know somebody's listening, like why would
they do that? But in some parts of the world,
gasolene is believed to clean wounds and kill bacteria. It's
old school, it's not FDA approved, but it's all they had,
and they did it with care and trust. It burned
like honesty and a toxic relationship. Crazy thing is, they

(06:23):
weren't being funny. They were being helpful.

Speaker 2 (06:26):
That was love.

Speaker 1 (06:27):
That's what they knew, and truthfully, I appreciated it.

Speaker 2 (06:31):
You know.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
Once the burning stopped and my soul returned to my body.

Speaker 2 (06:35):
No broken bones.

Speaker 1 (06:36):
Though, praise God, just some heavy bruises, raw skin and
a new respect for scooters and Dominicans with gasoline bottles.

Speaker 2 (06:44):
So what did I learned?

Speaker 1 (06:45):
Well, if you're ever in a foreign country and somebody
says want around a scooter, ask yourself, do I.

Speaker 2 (06:51):
Love my knees and elbows and hands.

Speaker 1 (06:54):
Also, sometimes help doesn't look how you expect it to,
but it's still help. World where people pull out their
phones faster than offer a hand that means something.

Speaker 2 (07:04):
And I didn't know, maybe you didn't either.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
I