Amelie Gillette Disobeys Bridger

Bridger doesn't completely freak out when Amelie Gillette (Black Monday, The Office) betrays him with a gift. They discuss crackers, cat names, and getting to know neighbors.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:08):
Well, I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear.
But you're I guess to my home. You gotta come
to be empty, And I said, no, guess your presences

(00:29):
presents and I already had too much stuff.

Speaker 2 (00:35):
So how did you dare to surbey me?

Speaker 3 (00:48):
Welcome to? I said, no gifts. I'm Bridger Wineger. It's
about five thirty where I'm five thirty PM where we're recording.
It's a little unusual for me. This is my evening
voice you're hearing, So if it seems a little bit
more evening style to you, that's the explanation. There's nothing

(01:11):
else going on. And yeah, I'm just hoping you're doing
okay because and I hope you're taking notes because you
you know, for podcast club or whatever, you're going to
want to be able to discuss this later with friends,
especially because we have such a wonderful guest, Omily Gillette, Emily,
Welcome to. I said, no gifts.

Speaker 4 (01:34):
Hi, Bridger, thank you for having me.

Speaker 3 (01:37):
Oh, of course, of course. I mean, you know, we
scheduled this for a one thirty pm a recording a
few weeks ago, and we've both had a turn in
our life where that was no longer possible. Now we're
now again for the second time. Coworkers.

Speaker 4 (01:57):
Yes, this is true.

Speaker 3 (01:58):
So we've already spent some time on Zoom today and
you know, maybe a little bit more rowdy out atmosphere
working on the television show Black Monday coming to Showtime
twenty twenty one to look out for that. But now
here we are at five thirty pm. How are you
feeling post work day?

Speaker 5 (02:19):
Oh my gosh, you know Zoom a Zoom work day.
It's weird.

Speaker 4 (02:25):
It's very weird, very weird.

Speaker 5 (02:29):
This is the first Zoom room that I've been in, right,
it is weird.

Speaker 3 (02:37):
It's a whole thing to adjust to. I've done one
other Zoom writers room and it was a smaller group
of people and it was so I thought I was
used to it, this whole situation. And I also do
a podcast over Zoom multiple times a month, so I thought,
you know, this is but every Zoom room is different,

(02:58):
and with this one, the thing I'm learning is that
you literally just have to steam roll through. If you're
going to say anything, you just have to keep talking.
And I feel like I steamrolled you today.

Speaker 4 (03:09):
Oh no, no, you didn't, you didn't.

Speaker 3 (03:11):
Well, I'm here to publicly apologize. But I had tried
speaking probably up until that point five times, and so
I started talking. I think we both started talking simultaneously,
and I said to myself, you can't stop talking. You've
got to keep talking.

Speaker 5 (03:25):
No, you just need to. It's a good strategy. Actually,
it's just to just to steamroll. I mean, now we're
going to call it the wineger. It's you know, it's
it's a good strategy because it's really the only way
to get people to listen.

Speaker 3 (03:41):
Truly. It's it's maddening. I mean, it's a crazy feeling
to try. I mean because I think how many people
are on our zoom it's probably ten to twelve people.

Speaker 5 (03:51):
Uh yeah, I think it's yeah, definitely ten, possibly.

Speaker 3 (03:55):
Twelve, maybe forty five. I mean yeah, there's a whole
lot of people that have ideas and who are talking,
and zoom is not an ideal option.

Speaker 6 (04:09):
No, And it's also like people will like the part
that always throws me off is like when people will
turn off their camera, so then everything shuffles.

Speaker 3 (04:19):
Oh, it throws everything off, like.

Speaker 4 (04:22):
Who am I looking at? Where am I looking?

Speaker 3 (04:25):
Where are my eyes darting to? Now?

Speaker 1 (04:28):
Why?

Speaker 3 (04:29):
Very confusing and disorienting. And then there's also the part
of my brain is like trying to figure out who
has disappeared, and there's a whole element of that. When
I'm ready, I'll put my thing on mute. Let's say
I need to go use the restroom or something. I
put it on mute, but leave my screen on.

Speaker 4 (04:45):
I have noticed that you do that. I think that
that is kind.

Speaker 3 (04:48):
I think it's tasteful. I think it's classy. I think
ultimately I'm thinking of others when I'm doing I'm thinking
of you. And I also want people to just get,
you know, a full look at my setup. While I'm gone,
people can kind of peek around and take a look.
So hopefully that's coming across, because I would be heartbroken
if people didn't realize the lengths I'm going to for

(05:10):
their comfort.

Speaker 4 (05:11):
No, no, I realize, and I appreciate it.

Speaker 5 (05:13):
And I did look around your entire zoom background when
you left, because you know, why not.

Speaker 4 (05:21):
I feel like it was an invitation to do that.

Speaker 3 (05:24):
You're in my home, you know, it's a little peek in.
And how often do you get a look at your coworkers' environments?
I mean hardly, ever, never, absolutely never so, I mean
I'm looking in on you right now, I'm seeing your peloton.
I mean, also, your lighting is fantastic. My lighting has

(05:45):
kind of descended into half of my faces lit by lamplight,
the other is dusk. I feel like I'm reporting from
some sort of noir. I should have like a hat
tipped over one eye or something.

Speaker 4 (05:58):
It is very noir.

Speaker 5 (06:01):
You need like some some like vertical blinds and like, uh,
just some mood like I mean, it's it's beautiful.

Speaker 3 (06:08):
Of course I have it.

Speaker 4 (06:09):
I have a window that is directly in front of
my face.

Speaker 5 (06:12):
Oh yeah, and then I do have this is visual,
but I have this little controller which controls the blinds.

Speaker 3 (06:22):
Oh you're kidding. It's like it looks like an egg timer. Yeah,
can you do that now? I'd love to watch this
and just describe to people what I'm seeing.

Speaker 5 (06:31):
This is going to be great.

Speaker 3 (06:32):
This is very James Bond.

Speaker 5 (06:34):
Thank you. Yeah, it's so here. I'll close the one
behind me so you can see, and then it will
slowly descend.

Speaker 4 (06:42):
Actually I don't know.

Speaker 3 (06:43):
If nothing is happening. Oh okay, it's oh, it is
slowly descending in kind of a sinister way. There's a blind.
I mean the shade is slowly lowering, as if somebody
was planning something.

Speaker 5 (06:57):
Yeah, exactly, it's very creepy. And then look, I'll stop
it and then I'll raise it. This is what I
do all day.

Speaker 3 (07:07):
You need to be doing this during work. Just see
if you can notice I should.

Speaker 4 (07:12):
I won't tell them about the remote. That'll be our secret.

Speaker 3 (07:15):
Yes, that's our little secret until this airs. I believe
this is going to air, right, I mean, I think
our last episode before Thanksgiving, So this is technically the
I said no gifts Thanksgiving special.

Speaker 4 (07:27):
I know that brought you a pie or something.

Speaker 3 (07:30):
Of course you would have, and that's why I didn't
tell you because I don't need you super spreading. And
so I just told myself keep that information until the
podcast and then blindside omily with it. And do you
have Thanksgiving plans this year?

Speaker 5 (07:49):
No?

Speaker 1 (07:50):
I don't have.

Speaker 5 (07:52):
We uh Mark, my husband and I we do not
have Thanksgiving plans. I imagine it's going to be us
run just in our home, staying inside because of the pandemic.

Speaker 3 (08:05):
Right, do you think you'll cook a big meal or
just what will you do? Have sandwiches? Some crackers out
of the cupboard, oh, okay.

Speaker 5 (08:16):
I mean I always eat crackers out of the cupboard
every every day. I don't even wait for Thanksgiving for
that to happen. I love a saltine, but aren't they good?

Speaker 3 (08:28):
I am happy to talk to you about saltines deeply
underrated cracker.

Speaker 5 (08:32):
I think they're so good, they're honestly maybe the perfect cracker.

Speaker 3 (08:37):
Oh absolutely.

Speaker 5 (08:39):
And what I love doing with saltines is like looking
on the side through the sleeve to see which ones
are burnt at the edges.

Speaker 3 (08:47):
Yes, then absolutely got those last.

Speaker 5 (08:52):
Yeah, I'll eat the non burnt ones, and then I'll
save those little burnt ones.

Speaker 4 (08:57):
That's just my eating strategy for saltine.

Speaker 3 (09:00):
I with saltines and wheat thins and triskets, I frequently
thought while eating them, if this was served to me
at a restaurant and it was the first time I
had had these, I would think, this is one of
the best restaurant meals I've ever eaten. This cracker tastes delicious.
What is this food they've made for me?

Speaker 5 (09:17):
It's true.

Speaker 3 (09:17):
I think you should be able to order just a
plate of crackers at a restaurant. I would go for that.
That's a good appetizer. Just sprinkle some saltines over a
plate and let me go for it.

Speaker 5 (09:28):
If you ever go to a restaurant and they have
a cracker on the menu, you should try it. Okay,
of course they must be very proud of that to
put it on a menu.

Speaker 3 (09:36):
To charge for a cracker, to charge.

Speaker 5 (09:39):
For allmate cracker when there were such decent crackers available
to all of us in the store.

Speaker 2 (09:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (09:44):
Right.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
Cracker is like the one food that it doesn't matter
where you come from, who you are, how much money
you make, you can get a good cracker.

Speaker 4 (09:54):
You can.

Speaker 3 (09:55):
You will be satisfied with a grocery store cracker. I
mean I couldn't even tell you another place to get
a cracker.

Speaker 4 (10:02):
No, Like I mean, yeah, where would you get one?

Speaker 5 (10:06):
I mean you can get them at You could get
them at like a right aid too, right, yeah, like.

Speaker 3 (10:12):
A pharmacy style. I feel like if you're buying saltines
at Rite aid, you do have the flu or food
poisoning or something has happened to your body that you
can only consume a saltine. But is saltine your favorite cracker?

Speaker 5 (10:25):
I mean no, they're great because I really enjoy salt
I love salt.

Speaker 2 (10:32):
I used to be jealous of deer when I found
out that they had salt licks.

Speaker 3 (10:35):
Of course, you know, why do they.

Speaker 4 (10:39):
Get all that salt? But yeah, I do love a saltine.
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (10:44):
My favorite would probably be I like a Melba toast.

Speaker 3 (10:50):
Oh, I don't know Melba toast.

Speaker 2 (10:52):
They're uh, they're kind of old school.

Speaker 4 (10:56):
There.

Speaker 2 (10:57):
They look very punishing. They look like they're like a
long rectangle, and they look healthy.

Speaker 6 (11:04):
I don't think they are, especially when you just put
a lot of butter on them, which is how I
enjoy eating a moment.

Speaker 3 (11:11):
It's a cracker, you have to butter. I don't think
I've ever buttered a cracker. You think buttering a saltine
would be psychotic? What the revelations are coming to light here?
That are wild? You're buttering a saltine?

Speaker 4 (11:33):
Yeah? Have you never done that?

Speaker 5 (11:34):
And then the best part is that you can squish
if you put them together, you put your saltians together.

Speaker 4 (11:40):
Then the butter wish is that through the This.

Speaker 3 (11:42):
Is something I've never seen another person do. I've never
even heard of doing. I mean, of course I cat
dipping a cracker, But saltines are so saltines are very fragile,
so I can't even imagine imagine placing a knife to
a saltine without it just crumbling. You have to be
very careful your saltine knife.

Speaker 5 (12:01):
Yes, yeah, you need a special knife, a very light knife.

Speaker 3 (12:07):
A saltine knife. I mean, a knife made of saltine
is the only knife I could imagine working on a saltine.
And you're going to have to have a very room
temperature butter for that situation.

Speaker 4 (12:17):
Yes, it has to be a soft butter that's.

Speaker 3 (12:19):
Not coming straight out of the fridge. And I guess
nobody wants a cold butter on a cracker.

Speaker 5 (12:24):
Now, it wouldn't work your cracker were crumble. It would
be a disaster.

Speaker 3 (12:30):
So you like a melba toast, I've never heard of
a melba toast, but that's something maybe I should look into.
I'm I think my number one is probably a trisc
it because it's it's such a hearty It's just you're
really getting a texture there that you're not getting another
foods and you only need a few and you're happy.

Speaker 5 (12:50):
Yeah, yeah, that is true. Yeah, you don't want to
eat a ton of trisc it.

Speaker 3 (12:56):
No, you don't want to like a full meal of
trisc it. I don't know what that would end up
feeling like in your stomach, but you know, you get
five or six and you're I mean, your saliva is
completely gone and you're probably that sixth cracker you are choking.
But if you get a nice little saltzer water or something,
or you know, for me, like a diet soda, something

(13:18):
that's way too sweet, you're getting the salts, you're getting
the sweet.

Speaker 4 (13:23):
To get mommy in there, and you've got them.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
All of course, there you go. What mommy thing would
you be eating with a trisk it is my question?

Speaker 1 (13:31):
Hmm.

Speaker 4 (13:33):
Some type of a meat, A.

Speaker 3 (13:34):
Meat maybe Pat. I've never had Pat.

Speaker 4 (13:39):
I am not a fan.

Speaker 3 (13:40):
I just conceptually like it. Conceptually I can't get into it,
and so I do feel like I should try it
at some point just to have experienced it. But just this,
a meat paste is not once we go from meat
to any other product, I'm an off board. You're going
to make Thanksgiving at home? That sounds nice?

Speaker 4 (14:03):
Yeah, I mean, we'll try it, sure.

Speaker 3 (14:05):
Right, I mean I don't know that there are too
many other options at this point. No.

Speaker 5 (14:11):
Last year, my husband was in Toronto, filming a show,
and so I went up for Thanksgiving and we made
a giant Thanksgiving dinner for the cast of that show. Yeah,
most of whom were not even American.

Speaker 4 (14:31):
A lot of them.

Speaker 5 (14:32):
Were British, some were Canadian, one was from New Zealand.

Speaker 4 (14:37):
No one understood any of the meal.

Speaker 3 (14:41):
This is very much in the spirit of the First Thanksgiving.

Speaker 4 (14:44):
Yeah, we taught them all about it.

Speaker 3 (14:48):
What more fun could you have than learning about Thanksgiving?
Has anybody done The Last Thanksgiving? I think that that
could be a sci fi movie.

Speaker 4 (14:57):
I think it was last year.

Speaker 3 (15:00):
Please know we're recording this too far in advance. I
don't know what timeline this episode will be released in,
and it's making me sick to my stuff.

Speaker 5 (15:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (15:09):
Sorry, Yes, I would totally watch that movie, The Last Thing.

Speaker 3 (15:13):
Last Thanksgiving. Anyone out there listening, That's my idea. So
I have a lawyer. I am happy to sue. I've
made that clear on other episodes of this podcast. I'm aggressive,
I'm litigious. I will come after you, so let me.
I will be releasing The Last Thanksgiving in the next
fifty years, So keep an eye out, keep an eye

(15:34):
out on cinema, maybe direct to streaming. I can't say
for sure, Emily, what else is going on in your life?
You've started a job for the first time in the
last three days this year.

Speaker 4 (15:47):
Yeah, this is true.

Speaker 3 (15:48):
What else were you doing before that? All right?

Speaker 5 (15:52):
You know, just just live in life, in this in
this pandemic, just in my home right with my peloton
and my husband and my cat.

Speaker 4 (16:07):
Yeah, I don't know what are people doing? Now?

Speaker 3 (16:09):
What do people do? I think that essentially what you
just described as what they do? I mean, I do
you feel like your cat is aware of how around
you are? I feel like that's our dog is like, oh,
this is crazy that they're just here all the time.
She's happy, but I don't think she understands why we
never leave.

Speaker 4 (16:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (16:27):
No, our cat is incredibly spoiled, okay, and by us
now being around all the time. And he will take
breaks from us, like he he will. He will be
in the room like near us, like he wants to
be narrows during certain parts of the day. But then
like there's a giant chunk of the day where he's
just like I'm going to go to bed, and he'll

(16:49):
just go into the bedroom and just sleep underneath the
bed for a few hours.

Speaker 4 (16:55):
He's had enough of this, and I don't blame him.

Speaker 3 (16:58):
I mean, there's only so much we can see each other.

Speaker 4 (17:00):
You need some alone time.

Speaker 3 (17:01):
Oh I A few weeks ago, I looked at my
boyfriend Shim and said, I need to speak to another
adult without you present, because this is just too I mean,
it's too much. It's way too much of the same people.

Speaker 4 (17:15):
It is way too much.

Speaker 5 (17:16):
And we do like to take the cat out in
our yard because our yard is very fenced in. The
cat likes to go outside. The cat's name is.

Speaker 3 (17:23):
Mister, mister okay, and is mister a male or female?

Speaker 5 (17:28):
He is a male okay. His given name from the
rescue that we got him from. His given name was Princess.

Speaker 3 (17:36):
Wow, this I mean the whiplash this cat is experiencing.

Speaker 4 (17:40):
And then yeah, his given name.

Speaker 5 (17:42):
Like when he was dropped off at the shelter, they
wrote a note that said this cat is very feral.
His name is a princess, which was wrong because he
is not feral at all. He is very accustomed to
people and likes them. But then they immediately changed his name.
They changed it from Princess to Asper, which I was

(18:03):
an immediate no one.

Speaker 4 (18:08):
So then I wanted to call him bonkers.

Speaker 5 (18:12):
Because I just thought it would be a funny name
for a cat, and we compromise by calling him mister.

Speaker 3 (18:18):
I think mister is a good name. I think, I
mean bonkers. To be out in your yard yelling bonkers, bonkers, bonkers,
I mean would be fun. But I also, you know,
you've got to show the animal some level of respect,
and I think mister is good. And I mean, in
some ways, could be a gender neutral name if we're
thinking about it as you know, like a you know,
like a water mister.

Speaker 4 (18:40):
Oh, I never thought about it a cat.

Speaker 3 (18:44):
That sprays, as many cats do, which is more of
a disgusting name for a cat. But yeah, I'm sorry
to you know, give these new layers to Mister's life.
But that's just reality, and that's what he's the name
he's been given until he escaped.

Speaker 5 (19:00):
Or I like to think that because we say his
name outside all the time when we're outside, like like
mister or mister, like a mister if he's bad. And
so I do like to think that now you put
that in my head that maybe our neighbors think we're
just talking about our water misters.

Speaker 3 (19:20):
Turn off the mister turn off two people who just
keep forgetting they have misters in their yard and walk out.

Speaker 5 (19:31):
Yeah, so we're just constantly frustrated by these misters. I mean,
I mean, I love that for us. I hope that
our neighbors do have that thought about us, that we're
not just two insane people who take their cat in
the yard.

Speaker 3 (19:45):
You spend a decent amount of time in Palm Springs.
Do you have a relationship with your neighbors or is
it just, you know, keep to yourself sort of thing.

Speaker 5 (19:52):
Uh, we do have. Okay, so by we, you mean
like my husband and I and I do not have.

Speaker 3 (19:58):
A relationship with Oh this is sounding familiar to me.

Speaker 5 (20:02):
Yeah, oh really, because my husband Mark, he's from the Midwest,
and he's just more outgoing when it comes to meeting
the neighbors, to being a good neighbor things like that.
I am more of a person who is just like, oh,
I'm just going to stay in my house and if
there's like an emergency or something, then I guess I'll
go knock on the neighbor's door. But I don't want

(20:23):
to bother them.

Speaker 4 (20:23):
They shouldn't bother us.

Speaker 5 (20:26):
But yes, he has he he had like he actually
had like a conversation with our neighbor Dean, who lives
next door to us, yesterday for about an hour.

Speaker 3 (20:35):
Wow, that's incredible to me. That is just so far
out of what my existence is. Making friends with people
that you just run into just is not something that
happens in my life me neither. If anything, I unsettle
people that I run into, and then they probably wonder
who I was or what I was doing for the

(20:55):
rest of their life. But then Jim, like he'll go
on walks to the neighborhood with the dog, moved into
a new neighborhood recently, and he's you know, he's he
knows half the neighborhood. Most of these people have never
seen me.

Speaker 5 (21:09):
Yeah, that's you or just you and Jim are just
like Mark and I because Mark is Yeah, he's in
a lot of ways, like a lot of ways, he's
the face of the relationship. You know, he's the one
that's like going out and like, you know, presenting us
to the public, claiming that he has this wife they
never see.

Speaker 3 (21:32):
That's beautiful, that's really beautiful. I mean, I don't want
to steer that too far away from this, but I
did and there's something, you know, there's something I need
to talk to you about, and I mean there is
something else I want to discuss about this with you.
I I received a package in the mail a couple
of weeks ago. You obviously agreed to be on my podcast.

(21:54):
I said, no gifts. And you know we're friends, on again,
off again, co workers, zoom communicators, we do you know,
our relationship has all these levels, and so I trust you.
I just kind of inherently at this point believe you
will not try to ruffle my feathers. And so I

(22:15):
was a little bit surprised when I got a box
on my porch and it was addressed to me from you,
And I don't know, Emily, is this a gift?

Speaker 4 (22:28):
You know, Bridger, it is. It is a gift. Yes
for me, Yes for you?

Speaker 3 (22:33):
Okay, great, okay, okay, okay. So there's still some level
of trust within this relationship. There Should I open it
here or wait till later?

Speaker 4 (22:47):
Oh?

Speaker 5 (22:48):
I mean, it is up to you because it is
a gift to you. I would love to see your
face when you open it.

Speaker 3 (22:53):
Okay, sure, I mean I do have a scissor handy.
Oh then I.

Speaker 4 (22:58):
Don't what are we waiting for.

Speaker 3 (23:06):
Okay, I mean there is something. Okay, I'm going to
do that. But there is a little topic I want
to discuss with you, because this is a new thing
that I've been dealing with in pandemic time, something that
I'm not quite sure how to handle, which is when
I send somebody something, for example, a gift, when they
you know, when they haven't expressed they told me not
to send them a gift, I'll send them a gift.

(23:27):
And there's the time when you don't know if you've
if they've gotten the gift, and I don't know how
to handle it, how to handle finding out if they
got the because I worry until i've heard. But I
also don't want to be ghost. I don't want to say, hey,
did you get the gift. I don't want to it
to feel like I'm gilting them. How do you handle
that sort of situation to make sure they got the

(23:48):
gift without ruining a surprise. This sort of thing that
is a dilemma.

Speaker 5 (23:54):
This has happened to me actually several times during the
pandemic because one of my favorite things to do Bridger
is to just send people random gifts.

Speaker 3 (24:03):
In the Maith, we've established that yeah, that they.

Speaker 5 (24:06):
Don't know are coming. It is sort of what I'm
known for. But yeah, it is weird because you can't
really just check in. And I mean the way that
I usually handle it is I'll just like text them
something random, right, and then sort of like dance around
the topic of the gift that I sent and then

(24:27):
and then if they don't bite, then they I guess
they didn't get it, but or they're just rude and
they don't want to tell me.

Speaker 3 (24:34):
I guess maybe it is just a more of a
test of who in your life is rude. It is, yeah,
because I think if you get a package from somebody,
you should alert them. I mean, I am now exposing myself.
I never told you that I got this in the well,
maybe I did. I may not have told.

Speaker 4 (24:52):
You you did bridge.

Speaker 3 (24:53):
I did tell you that.

Speaker 5 (24:56):
You did the polite thing, which is I think in
this situation, and the recipient has to when they get
the gift, send a photo.

Speaker 3 (25:05):
Yes, I think that that helps. I mean it eases
everybody's nerves. Yeah, otherwise I'm in a total frenzy until
I've found out if they got it or not. And
I don't want to leave in the surprise. Okay, well,
I don't know that we came to any clear answer
there on how you handle it, but I don't know
that there is one. Ultimately, I'm going to open this gift.

(25:26):
So I'm going to put the mic in the mic stand,
get my handy scissor. It's a a sign this might
be the heaviest gift given on this podcast, so we'll
say that. Wow, I'm going to pick it up. It's
in a brown box. I don't know what's in here
that I'm gonna scissor. I'm not going to a scissor it.
I'm gonna I'm going to open it with a pair
of scissors.

Speaker 4 (25:46):
This is exciting.

Speaker 3 (25:48):
Oh it's so heavy. I mean, it's heavier than you
would expect. Okay, you know I've been given like a
as much as light of an object on this podcast
is a cherry tomato. So I'm not hand I'm not
used to a a weighty gift. So here we go.

(26:13):
This is a lot for me to handle. This is
did you wrap this? Did you package this? Taping job?

Speaker 4 (26:22):
Thank you? Okay again, this is what I'm known for.

Speaker 3 (26:28):
What is Oh, so we're getting into this. There's already Okay,
so we could have opened this box pre podcast, yes,
because there's a there's now an actually wrapped gift. But
you know, I try to be honest. I want this
surprise to be as pure as possible, so I I
didn't open the box because you know, there could have

(26:49):
just been the surprise right inside ruin it and then
the thrill is gone. So I've opened the box and
now we have a wrapped gift here, which is a
beautiful Laurel rap. I mean, look at that. That's gorgeous.
So that's just maybe I should take a picture of
it now before I unwrap, because it's always worth documenting. Okay,

(27:11):
I'm gonna open this now. This is the longest unwrapping
of this podcast, and.

Speaker 6 (27:17):
I like that.

Speaker 3 (27:18):
Okay, good, Okay, here we go. I'm unwrapping. Oh my god, what.

Speaker 5 (27:33):
This is?

Speaker 3 (27:34):
You have given me something for my heart? This may
be the the uh, I mean the uh. I feel
so deeply seen by this gift that I could uh
start crying. You've given me an entire stack of vintage

(27:57):
People magazines, which is for me. That's correct all I
could ever possibly ask for. I mean, the first one
I'm seeing is Larry Hagman is back from the brink
the Dallas Stars. This is also you're a big Dallas fan.

Speaker 5 (28:16):
Oh, a huge Dallas fan.

Speaker 4 (28:18):
I found Dallas.

Speaker 5 (28:19):
Like a couple of years ago, and Mark and I
spent I think two years watching every episode of Dallas.

Speaker 3 (28:27):
How money, are there.

Speaker 4 (28:29):
A million there? Like there's fourteen seasons.

Speaker 3 (28:32):
No, and they're probably like twenty episodes each.

Speaker 5 (28:35):
At least I would say the average number of episodes
is twenty two.

Speaker 3 (28:39):
And during an hour long.

Speaker 5 (28:41):
And they're well, they're like forty five minutes. But yeah,
because it's like a network television hour. But yeah, it's
an amazing sho.

Speaker 3 (28:47):
You are a you have an appetite for television unlike
anybody I've ever seen before.

Speaker 5 (28:52):
It's my one ture joy.

Speaker 3 (28:53):
You would come into work when we were actually working
in an office last season, and you know, we get
to work at ten am, and you would have watched
like three hours of TV before you even got there.

Speaker 4 (29:03):
Yeah, yeah, which is amazing.

Speaker 3 (29:05):
I'm so jealous of that ability.

Speaker 4 (29:07):
I have TV on pretty much all the time.

Speaker 3 (29:09):
That's great. I absolutely support that. I mean, I'm so torn.
Let's go through some of these people magazines and just
talk about you know thoughts and feelings. I mean this one.
I mean, this has obviously got Dallas on it. It
also has Ted Danson and Mary Stein Virgin's wedding bash.
So that's the year we're looking at here, which is

(29:30):
nineteen ninety five. They got married.

Speaker 5 (29:33):
That's so crazy.

Speaker 3 (29:34):
And they're still together.

Speaker 4 (29:35):
They're still together.

Speaker 3 (29:36):
They're great, and they seem like a great couple to me.

Speaker 4 (29:39):
They do.

Speaker 3 (29:39):
Do you have that feeling? I mean, she is just dynamite.

Speaker 5 (29:44):
She's a delight, She's I love everything about her. She
seems so pleasant.

Speaker 3 (29:50):
And she's in one of my favorite movies, which is Clifford.
Do you know that movie?

Speaker 5 (29:57):
No, I've never seen it.

Speaker 3 (29:58):
Oh it's oh you I have to see it.

Speaker 4 (30:01):
The Big Red Dogs.

Speaker 3 (30:02):
Oh no, no, no. Martin Short as a ten year old boy.

Speaker 5 (30:05):
Oh, I've never heard of this movie.

Speaker 4 (30:07):
What.

Speaker 3 (30:07):
It's incredible. It's maybe one of the best comedic performances
I've ever seen Martin Short playing a ten year old boy.
I mean, it's like, if you like Martin Short even remotely,
it's maybe his best performance. It's incredible. Wow, really a
wild movie. And then Mary is in it. Charles Groden,

(30:29):
Richard Kind and the movie bombed so bad that it
bankrupted the company that produced it.

Speaker 5 (30:36):
So, oh, I love a flop. That's great. I got
to see this movie. She's she's also in book Club.
I thought I thought you were going to say your
favorite movie is book Club.

Speaker 3 (30:46):
I don't know book Club.

Speaker 4 (30:48):
Book Club came out not that long ago.

Speaker 3 (30:50):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (30:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (30:52):
It was about Mary Stine Virgin and Kandicebergen and Jane
Fonda okay, and somebody else who I can't remember, four
grand dames of the Silver School.

Speaker 3 (31:03):
Of course.

Speaker 5 (31:03):
It was about them starting a book club where they
read fifty Shits of Gray and how change their lives.

Speaker 3 (31:10):
Wow, that's uh yeah, it's weird to make a movie
about a book club and then having to pick the book.
Uh is that's the whole thing. Seems like a bad
idea to me.

Speaker 4 (31:21):
Yeah, I'm gonna be honest with you.

Speaker 3 (31:23):
Oh.

Speaker 4 (31:23):
Diane Keaton, that's the other lady.

Speaker 3 (31:24):
Okay, what a cast?

Speaker 2 (31:26):
What a cast.

Speaker 4 (31:27):
The best part of the movie was Diane Keaton.

Speaker 5 (31:31):
She gets a love interest and her three friends are like,
you know, Diane, like, what are you doing? You're going
out with this guy? You're all sexed up because of
this book. You need to you need to make over.
And so they do a makeover montage on Diane Keaton
and nothing changed. She comes out and she's still covered

(31:52):
from neck to tour as is her wont Yeah, and uh,
there's there's no change. It's pretty great.

Speaker 3 (32:02):
Have you heard the rumor about Dolly Parton having sleeve tattoos?
I have?

Speaker 4 (32:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (32:07):
I wonder if Diane has a full body tattoo.

Speaker 4 (32:12):
That would be amazing to ankle just tattooed and her
hands and her hands right, Wow, she wears gloves too.

Speaker 3 (32:21):
She maybe she's either afraid of the sun or she's
got just an incredible full body tattoo either as fine.

Speaker 4 (32:30):
I saw her once feeding a meter in l.

Speaker 3 (32:34):
That's an incredible thing.

Speaker 5 (32:35):
It was probably the greatest celebrity seting that I've ever had.

Speaker 3 (32:39):
Did you have gloves while she fed the meter?

Speaker 4 (32:41):
She had gloves on. She was wearing a hat.

Speaker 5 (32:44):
She was wearing like a collared shirt, and underneath it
I could see that there was a turtle knack.

Speaker 4 (32:49):
It was great.

Speaker 3 (32:51):
Oh, I was so jealous.

Speaker 5 (32:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (32:53):
It was the most starstruck I think I've ever been.

Speaker 5 (32:55):
She obviously didn't care.

Speaker 3 (32:59):
No, I imagine she was as starstruck to see you.
I'm this feels a little like when I saw ben
Stein at a bus stop, or someone who looked like
ben Stein sitting at a bus stop when you live
in Los Angeles. My rule is if it looks remotely
like the person, the story is now that person about
that person, that celebrity. And this guy looked for all

(33:22):
intents and purposes like ben Stein waiting for the bus.
So definitely, let's just believe that it was him and
move on, because I would be shattered if it weren't.
Oh so now, oh wow. So the next magazine, we're
hopping back two years, and this is an interesting I
feel like you've almost placed these in order because Ted

(33:44):
and Whoopee are in love on this People magazine. How
things can change in just two years for and Ted
dance and they're made in America. Love scenes were no act.
Here are the provocative pairings that played out on the
sets of this summer's hottest movies and shows and what
you won't see on screen. And I don't know that

(34:05):
I even know these other celebrities. Interesting that tracks, I.

Speaker 5 (34:11):
Mean, it's I have to tell you, I'm very happy
that you that you love this.

Speaker 4 (34:18):
This lot of People magazines.

Speaker 3 (34:21):
Where did you get them?

Speaker 4 (34:22):
I got them off of eBay.

Speaker 3 (34:23):
It's they're beautiful.

Speaker 5 (34:25):
It's something that I've really started to do during the pandemic,
which is go on eBay and search for vintage People
magazines and a lot of times people just want to
unload them. They they will say, here's thirty five issues
of People magazine that you can buy in one fell swoop.
Please take them, please please.

Speaker 3 (34:47):
And I do what sparked this for you?

Speaker 4 (34:50):
First off, I love tabloids and I love gossip I live.

Speaker 3 (34:56):
Sometimes I go to the grocery store just to look
at them.

Speaker 5 (34:59):
Oh they're beautiful. I think it's a great pastime. It's
always entertaining. But my favorite part of People magazine, which
they don't do anymore in the current day issues of People,
is the mail bag. Oh yes, So I really got
into the vintage Peoples because of the mail bag.

Speaker 3 (35:19):
What are people writing into people about?

Speaker 4 (35:22):
Oh, it's great, Bridger.

Speaker 5 (35:23):
They're so passionate about the stupidest things. And you know
these people they were writing letters.

Speaker 3 (35:31):
Right, they were just shooting off an email. They had
to sit down and write a letter about whatever topic
and then send it to a magazine.

Speaker 5 (35:39):
Look up the address, buy a stamp, post it. It's
a lot of effort to write a letter about you
know how, maybe you think that one of their choices
in the fifty most Beautiful People section was wrong.

Speaker 3 (35:54):
Oh this is such a beautiful thing. I've needed something
for my coffee table. I'd had a few vintage family
circles sitting on my table and they're a little beat
up at this point. So this is going to be able.
I'll be able to refresh them every few weeks. And
I mean, suddenly you've got Robert Danny Junior's sad fall
in the August of nineteen ninety six.

Speaker 4 (36:15):
We all remember that.

Speaker 3 (36:16):
Of course, gwynethan brad do the White House. I mean
the language. I don't know that I've ever talked to
you about this, but just the language of a magazine,
of a tabloid magazine cover is will never stop being
funny to me.

Speaker 5 (36:32):
Oh agree, It's just.

Speaker 3 (36:35):
I mean, wow, this one is especially powerful. It's a
Princess Diana and Prince Charles. He never loved her. It's
charles shocking confession makes the divorce certain and leaves Britain
wondering if he's fit to be king and we'll probably
never know.

Speaker 4 (36:53):
No, we're never gonna know.

Speaker 3 (36:54):
We're never gonna know if and it's I mean, this
is just outstanding.

Speaker 6 (37:00):
Now.

Speaker 3 (37:00):
Do you subscribe to any tabloids?

Speaker 5 (37:03):
Oh? Yeah, yep, I sure do. I subscribe to to
US Weekly.

Speaker 3 (37:10):
Oh of course. That's kind of has US kind of
taken over for People.

Speaker 5 (37:14):
You know, it did for a first spell there, but
it had like the more selacious gossip people sort of
you know, they wanted to be like a little bit
more celebrity friendly.

Speaker 3 (37:26):
Well, they're a trusted journalistic news source, let's just say it. People, Yeah,
they are.

Speaker 5 (37:32):
But People is always my favorite because People also has
true crime, right, which US does not really dabble in
unless it's unless it's celebrity.

Speaker 3 (37:42):
During the crime, celebrity on celebrity crime. Yeah, yeah, People,
I think, I mean it's is it every issue? They
have a true crime story?

Speaker 4 (37:51):
Yeah? They should.

Speaker 5 (37:53):
No, they do, they do. I know that I know
for a fact that they do because I read it.
But they do sometimes you know, it's not not the
best selection, right, but they try.

Speaker 3 (38:05):
Have you read any good true crime People stories recently?

Speaker 5 (38:09):
So in one of my lot of vintage People magazines,
I think it was from like the early nineties. I
read about this kid who murdered his parents, which, uh,
you know, it really did tick all the boxes in
terms of like what you want in the delicious true

(38:29):
crime story.

Speaker 3 (38:30):
Like what what was happening?

Speaker 5 (38:32):
He was? You know, there were photos of him. I
think he was a hockey player, so there were like
lots of photos of him with like his hockey team,
and like, no one suspected.

Speaker 3 (38:40):
Well, I mean anytime somebody suspect. I don't know many
situations where someone suspected. No, it's usually kind of out
of nowhere, isn't it.

Speaker 5 (38:51):
I would think, although, like if I were if I
were to be called to be like on a like
on a dateline, or like as like a friend of
or an acquaintance of in a true crime story, I
would say that I knew the whole time. I wouldn't.
I wouldn't delve into this narrative of like, no, I
never suspected he was so nice, she was so nice.

(39:14):
I would be like I always thought there was a darkness.
I told a lot of people, no one believed me.

Speaker 3 (39:20):
That's a great, great tag today. Anyone who didn't see
this coming was a fool, And you could just make
yourself a hero in that situation. Who's going to call
you out?

Speaker 5 (39:32):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (39:33):
And I would say I told a lot of people
and yeah, I mean, what are they going to do?
Call me a liar? No, they're in jail.

Speaker 3 (39:44):
Oh that I need to keep that in mind for
if I ever go on one of these things. I knew,
I knew it was coming, but maybe I won't say
I told anyone else. I thought I would keep it
to myself and see what happened. I was interested that
it seemed like it might go in a different direction
and that might be fun to watch, so I kept
it to myself.

Speaker 5 (40:04):
You're like, I'm saving it all for you, Keith Morrison.

Speaker 3 (40:10):
Oh, I mean, what a strange sensation to end up
as one of those people on dateline, because you know,
it's something we all dream of doing, but the circumstances
that lead to that are usually not not ideal. I
think you kind of wanted to be like the coworker
you hate that does it. Yes, yeah, then you don't
have you don't experience personal tragedy.

Speaker 5 (40:32):
Or like, let's say one of these neighbors that I
will never meet or talk to.

Speaker 3 (40:37):
And suddenly you know everything about them, You're the no
at all.

Speaker 5 (40:39):
Yeah, Suddenly I'm like, oh, yeah, no. We would talk
to him all the time. He always parked his car
in such a way that I thought was suspicious. Those
kinds of details, really they land you the interviews, that's what.

Speaker 3 (40:54):
How do they track these people down? I would not
want that job to be like the guy who has
to find him to ors friends to be on TV.

Speaker 5 (41:02):
No, it seems pretty terrible.

Speaker 3 (41:04):
Not ideal, not ideal. Well, you know, this is truly
the gift of legends. I do want to just read
a few more things, because I like out of context
headlines on these magazines are always wonderful. For example, Tiffany
versus her mom. What does that war of the gossips?

(41:25):
Why women fight at work?

Speaker 4 (41:30):
Want to?

Speaker 3 (41:30):
I know, I think we'd all like to know why
women won't stop fighting at work? Oh, Madonna and Warren? Okay,
I mean we're getting Liz Taylor's out of the hospital
into a cause. Well, I don't even into a cause.
What are we talking about here? And let's just try
to babies who have babies. That's a classic.

Speaker 4 (41:52):
That is always a classic.

Speaker 3 (41:53):
Day in the life of teen pregnancy in America and
you're Yeah, this is a lot to handle. This is
I'm going to this is going to take up the
rest of my Oh. Riva McIntyre. I had a dream
about Reba McIntyre last night. I did. I had a
dream that I met her and her husband. But I
don't think she's married anymore. But in the dream, they
were hiding from me the fact that they were billionaires.

(42:16):
They were deeply ashamed that they were billionaires.

Speaker 5 (42:19):
But she was Reba mc.

Speaker 3 (42:21):
McIntyre, and I was like trying to comfort her. I
was like, Reaba, I don't care that you're a billionaire,
You're still I don't know why I'm having that dream.
But now I've got an exclusive visit to her home
in this Oh this is a People extra. So that's
a collector's edition.

Speaker 4 (42:38):
Oh so yeah, sometimes they'll throw those in there on eBay.

Speaker 3 (42:41):
Oh it's gold, It's absolute gold. Alan Jackson, I'm going
to get a tour of his home. I mean, this
is something so unbelievably special. I mean, you get all
kinds of range of a whole range of gifts on
a podcast about gifts, and how often does some just
not only speak to your soul, they sing to your soul. Omily,

(43:04):
you have sung to my skull, my soul with this gift.
I just can't get enough. But all that, it's time
to play a game.

Speaker 4 (43:13):
Oh oh, all right, we have.

Speaker 3 (43:16):
Games called Gift Master or Gift or a Curse, and
I guess I have to now start reminding people. As
of this recording, there's now an at home version of
Gift or a Curse. No, just kidding, there's now an
at home version of Gift Master, which you can you can,
I don't. I can't remember how you find it online,

(43:36):
but if you can, you'll find it. It's very fun
to play and will cause family problems, problems with your friends,
and you'll get to play this game at home. So, Emily,
do you want to play Gift Master or Gift or
a Curse?

Speaker 5 (43:49):
Oh well, I feel like we should play Gift Master
because it's now available in a home edition.

Speaker 3 (43:53):
Yeah, let's let's turn this into just a full uh yeah,
a full demo. I mean, the the home version is
slightly different because you're going to be fighting with your
friends and family. But yeah, Emily, I need a number
between one and ten from you.

Speaker 4 (44:09):
Okay, I'm going to go with three.

Speaker 3 (44:10):
Okay, I have to calculate the elements of the game
right now. So for the next whoever knows, who knows
how long you can promote, you can recommend, you can
just drag somebody through the mud. That do whatever you
need to do. I'll be right back.

Speaker 4 (44:24):
Oh, I would love to drag someone through the mud.
But who to drag? Who to drag? I have nothing to.

Speaker 5 (44:30):
Promote, I will I will say that I've been really
enjoying this app called Pluto TV, which, if you're a
television addict like myself, is basically every old TV show
that you can think of that has its own channel

(44:51):
that will replay the show twenty four to seven. So
there is a there is literally a channel on Pluto TV,
the app that is a Deal or No Deal channel,
and it will constantly play the television show Dealer No Deal,
which is kind of hypnotic. There's also a channel that
literally just plays the MTV dating show from the early

(45:14):
two thousands called Next, which is an instant classic. It's
also got like some old things on there, like old
Johnny Carson. If that's your thing, it's not really mine.
It's got something for everyone, So yeah, you guys, check
it out. Pluto TV.

Speaker 3 (45:30):
So you came on my podcast too. You're getting paid
millions by Pluto TV. I need to try Pluto TV.
I've heard things, and again, listener, neither of us has
been paid by Pluto TV. I don't know how to
have the money to pay anyone, but I've heard that
it's got a lot of you know, the forgotten elements
of TV.

Speaker 5 (45:51):
Yeah, just things that you are like, oh, how could
there possibly be enough of this show to fill a
channel for twenty four hours a day until eternity? But
there is like like Next, that show Next. There are
a million episodes of Next, Like it's crazy.

Speaker 3 (46:09):
I've got to give it a shot. But all that aside,
we've got to play the game. I'm going to tell
you three gifts and three celebrities, and then you're gonna
tell me which gift you're gonna give, which celebrity and why. Okay, Okay,
so I hope just buckle up, Omily. The gifts you're
going to be giving are a tin of popcorn, a

(46:32):
meet and greet with Tony Hawk, and where is the
final gift? I constantly struggle A ten pound box of salmon.
That's the third gift. Okay, So those are the gifts
you're going to be giving. The following people. Following people
you'll be giving gifts too are Apple CEO Tim Cook,

(46:58):
rap legend Missy Misdemeanor Elliott, and finally somebody who's a
little bit newer to the scene, pop songstress Charlie xc X.
So there you go, what are you are you giving
these gifts? And why? And yeah, yeah, I don't know
why I said, And there's no ant, it's just that.

Speaker 1 (47:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (47:22):
Out of the list of those celebrities, I mean, no
staid on Tim Cook, I'm sure he's a great guy.
Uh Sam with Charlie, I enjoy her hit, but Missy
is Missy's my favor in this list. So I'm going
to give her the gift that I think I would
enjoy the most and maybe maybe she would also enjoy it,

(47:43):
which is the tin of popcorn, because that just sounds
that sounds great, Like who doesn't want a tin of
I mean usually those stings of popcorn, they do taste
a little.

Speaker 4 (47:55):
Stale, usually terrible, They're usually terrible.

Speaker 5 (47:59):
I'm sorry, Missy, but out of those gifts, it's like,
you know, ten pounds of salmon. I don't think she wants.

Speaker 3 (48:07):
That that's a time bomb.

Speaker 4 (48:10):
It's it's not a great gifts.

Speaker 5 (48:13):
It seems like a burden.

Speaker 4 (48:14):
Really.

Speaker 3 (48:14):
I will say this though, I mean, out of all
of those people, Missy is most likely to own like
a seal or something that would eat fish.

Speaker 4 (48:23):
Oh good call.

Speaker 3 (48:24):
Well, I can imagine her having kind of a like
a shark tank or something where she's got you know,
pets to feed through the salmon too.

Speaker 4 (48:35):
Yeah, so maybe she has a cat.

Speaker 3 (48:37):
Yeah, she could be feeding a whole colony of cats.

Speaker 5 (48:39):
We don't know, but you made me like reevaluate my
options here, Bursuer.

Speaker 4 (48:43):
This is this is hard giving.

Speaker 5 (48:46):
These giving these imaginary gifts to these celebrities. I do
think that a meat and greet with Tony Hawk, I
don't really want to put Tony Hawk through meeting Tim Cook.

Speaker 4 (49:01):
I think, I don't.

Speaker 5 (49:03):
Know, it feels like it would be a very awkward
situation for the two of them. Tim Cook would probably
come in on a skateboard. Maybe it should be very embarrassed.

Speaker 3 (49:13):
Absolutely would come in on a skateboard.

Speaker 5 (49:15):
Yeah, and then he's like try to get him, like
he tried to get Tony Hawk to do some weird
cross promotion with an iPhone or something there.

Speaker 4 (49:24):
It wouldn't go well.

Speaker 5 (49:25):
So I'm going to give the Tony Hawk Meet and
great to our friend Charlie perfect.

Speaker 3 (49:30):
I can see her getting into skating.

Speaker 5 (49:32):
Sure, and you know, maybe they could talk about I
don't know, does he have a video game or something?

Speaker 3 (49:38):
Oh, only give me a break. Does he have a
video game? He's got? So there were so many Tony
Hawk video games?

Speaker 4 (49:46):
Is that like what he does now? That is what
I think?

Speaker 3 (49:47):
That's kind of that was kind of his secret way
to everyone knowing who he was. You know, I think
he was a good skateboarder, then had a video game
which reached people such as myself who were not cool
and so and now he's kind of, you know, just
a household name.

Speaker 4 (50:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (50:07):
But he and Charlie could play the video game together
or collaborate in some way.

Speaker 5 (50:13):
Yeah, like he would maybe like the sound, like the
sound that he makes on his on his skateboard. She
could put that into a song. Oh.

Speaker 3 (50:19):
Or she's an experiment experimenter is that a word? Nobody knows?

Speaker 4 (50:25):
No one.

Speaker 3 (50:25):
I could see her, you know, dabbling with some field
recordings of skateboards.

Speaker 5 (50:30):
Yeah, right, I feel like those two. Yeah, those two
they're gonna they're gonna have a great time together. What
a great gift I gave her. And yeah, that means
that Tim Cook gets that salmon, which I honestly think
would be great because he could bring that to the office.

Speaker 3 (50:46):
Oh that's true. He could. I think people would be
happy to see him walking into the office with ten
pounds of raw fish.

Speaker 4 (50:55):
What else are you supposed to do it?

Speaker 3 (50:58):
I mean he could he could hold like company barbecue.

Speaker 4 (51:02):
Uh, put it on a card table the entrance.

Speaker 3 (51:07):
You really have no idea, it's uh yeah, but I
think that that's not a bad I can. I think
that that fits. I think you've you've nailed it. I
hate to say it. I hate to say it, but
I think you've nailed it. What a wonderful job you've
done there. So let's move on to the next thing.

(51:28):
And yeah, let's see here, we've got to answer some questions.
This is called I said no questions. People are writing
into I said no gifts at gmail dot com. They
are desperate for answers. So we're going to answer a
couple questions here. Would you help me with this? With that,
you've just shown off what a great gift giver you are.
Here's the first one that says, Dear Bridger and Guest,

(51:48):
I have a tricky gift situation. I'm hoping you can
help me with. My parents got divorced last year after
thirty two years of marriage. My dad has a new
girlfriend who was a friend of my mom's. Oh boy,
I don't like it, but I'm trying to stay out
of everyone's business and maintain a relationship with my dad. Now,
my dad and his girlfriend are buying a house together
near where me and my husband live. I need help

(52:12):
thinking of a housewarming gift that is polite but not
too welcoming. I don't want I don't really want a
relationship with this girlfriend. I just want to keep the
peace that's from Alex Alex's dad. Her dad is making
some interesting moves in his life. And the new girlfriend,
who is probably the mom's now ex friend.

Speaker 4 (52:36):
What do we can't imagine they're hanging out.

Speaker 3 (52:37):
I don't think they're hanging out. I mean the first
thing that pops into my mind housewarming gift for this
dad's new girlfriend is a giant oil painting of mom,
something that they can hang over the fireplace, in the
bedroom wherever it needs to be. She is a reminder
to dad and girlfriend that mom has been betrayed by

(53:01):
two separate people.

Speaker 5 (53:03):
Always number one. That your mom is always going to
be number one. She's always looking over their shoulder from
an oil painting.

Speaker 4 (53:14):
Yeah, I don't care.

Speaker 3 (53:16):
What's something that's a gift that's not too welcoming. I
think that that's the sort of thing.

Speaker 5 (53:21):
Is like a plant, Yeah, because plants die and hopefully
like their relationship will too. Yeah, I mean, and also
a plant, a plant is really.

Speaker 4 (53:35):
Like, I mean, it is a burden.

Speaker 5 (53:37):
Like that is very much like giving somebody ten pounds
of salmon. It's it's something that you know sounds maybe
okay on paper, but then like in reality, you're just like,
what am I going to do with this?

Speaker 3 (53:48):
Right? Right?

Speaker 4 (53:50):
Also, she doesn't.

Speaker 5 (53:51):
Sound very nurturing this friend, so it will die. I
would probably honestly just give her a candle.

Speaker 3 (54:02):
Oh is a perfect neutral.

Speaker 5 (54:04):
I mean, it's it's just a it's kind of a
fuck you, like it really is just like I didn't
put any thought into this at.

Speaker 3 (54:12):
All, right, especially if it over like a vanilla or
a fresh linen.

Speaker 5 (54:16):
Yes, yes, or like a cinnamon spike.

Speaker 3 (54:20):
You go, like with a really pungent flavor, like a
pine cone or something, and then they really can't even
use it.

Speaker 4 (54:26):
Yes, they'll take they can smell it, and the box
isn't even open.

Speaker 3 (54:29):
No one wants an house to smell like a hot
pine cone. No, no, I don't know if that's even
a smell of candle. But yank Yankee Candle company reach
out to me. We can figure out how to make
a pine cone candle hot pine. I think that's fine.
I think we've given Alex the answers she needs. We've
got to move on. I have so many questions that

(54:51):
I'm just trying to power through these. This is bridger
parentheses and guests, so you're more of a parenthetical here,
and that's fine. My boss's wife is due with their
first child early next year. We work well together and
have worked together for several years in an office job.
I met the wife once and she seems lovely as well.
What's an appropriate gift to give given that this is

(55:13):
a good employer employee relationship and stay well from Vanessa.
Vanessa needs to get the boss's wife a gift, and
she likes both of them, and for the baby, I
guess I just immediately forgot that, you know what. I
think that with a baby, my go to is usually books.
I like to get a few nice books to remind

(55:35):
people that reading is valuable. This baby's going to get
a lot of clothes up front that it's going to
grow out of immediately. Yeah, the toys are probably going
to be made from non recyclable plastic, so that's devastating
to the environment. But you go with a book, and

(55:57):
this baby everyone's happy.

Speaker 5 (55:59):
I think, yeah, books are always my go to for
babies only because I don't really know what babies want ever,
and uh and I feel like at some point they
will they will learn how to read, right. Yeah, I
don't like giving I don't like giving kids toys.

Speaker 3 (56:22):
Yeah, I mean baby toys, especially before toddler, before childhood.
Baby toys to me, all, I'm like blind to them.
They all look exactly the same to me. I don't
know what I'm giving anybody or what it's going to do.
And then I'm I'll like google best baby toys, and
then suddenly I'm getting some you know article that was
clearly a paid for article, and who knows if these

(56:44):
toys are even good for the baby. But I know
a book works and mother or father can read to
baby and everybody's happy. Vanessa, go with books, Go with books.

Speaker 4 (56:57):
I just got a book.

Speaker 3 (56:59):
No, this is unconventional because I usually only do two.
But we have a Thanksgiving related question, so let's just
quickly answer this person. Hello Bridger and honored guests. So
I'm glad we are answering this one. I'm driving across
the country for Thanksgiving to visit my brother in San Diego.
His girlfriend has graciously agreed to let me stay at
her apartment for the visit. They started dating in March

(57:21):
and asked my mom and I for family recipes to
make my brother food when he feels homesick. So what
a wonderful person. What would be what would be a
good gift to give her as a thank you for
housing me? She likes to cook, is a student, and
for some okay now, and for some reason likes my
little brother. Okay, let's leave the little brother alone. Best
from Chloe in Chicago. So Chloe needs to buy this

(57:45):
brother's sweet girlfriend a gift for staying with her. Do
you get people gifts when you stay with him? I should, Yeah,
that's my answer.

Speaker 4 (57:57):
I usually I give them.

Speaker 5 (58:00):
I will take them to dinner, right, or that type
of a thing, like like, my presence is for you.
You enjoyed having me here, You enjoyed having me. Let's
eat together.

Speaker 4 (58:11):
Yeah, I don't know. She likes cooking.

Speaker 3 (58:13):
She does like cooking. I feel like cookbook, cookbook.

Speaker 4 (58:19):
Sure, that's good.

Speaker 5 (58:22):
I like you can get her like a fun set
of measuring cups.

Speaker 3 (58:27):
Oh yeah, Like I think a high quality set of
measuring cups because I usually cheap on them, and I
think most people don't go for a high quality. But
you get them a nice thing that they're going to
be able to use, dishwasher friendly obviously. I think that
that's not a bad idea. Or a nice cutting board,
you know, like a good size cutting board. All of
mine are about the size of a ruler, and so

(58:49):
anything that I cut on them is immediately on the counter.
So I think a cutting board. Go kind of you know,
splurge on a cutting board.

Speaker 5 (58:58):
That's always a good give because people always destroy their
cutting boards.

Speaker 3 (59:03):
Right because they're hacking away on them. They're yeah, maybe
running them through the washer too many times. You show up,
you drive across the country, you've got the room in
the car, throw a either wood, a nice wood or
marble cutting board in the back of the car. And
brother's girlfriend's going to be thrilled out of her mind.

Speaker 4 (59:22):
She's gonna love it.

Speaker 5 (59:24):
She can't complain, yeah, I mean, and if she does complain,
then I mean, then she didn't deserve it.

Speaker 3 (59:29):
Yeah, she didn't deserve it, and she revealed herself as
a bad person. And that's Emily. We did an excellent
job answering questions. It's just been lovely having you here.
I mean, my gosh, what a lovely time. And I
am now I've been showered with what is one of

(59:49):
my favorite things in the world, People magazine, a tablet
tabloid I will read till the end of the day.
God bless you.

Speaker 5 (59:59):
Of course. Can I tell you what my favorite tabloid headline? Ever?

Speaker 3 (01:00:04):
Of course, the fact that we're only getting to this
right now is making me sick.

Speaker 5 (01:00:08):
Oh. I literally just remembered, but I can't believe I
ever forgot it. My favorite tabloid headline was in Star magazine.
I don't remember the year, but it was a close
up of Demi Moore's knees and they had a giant
yellow circle around it and it said, OMG, she finally
had them lifted.

Speaker 3 (01:00:29):
Knees lifted, Yeah, which she didn't.

Speaker 4 (01:00:32):
I mean, I don't.

Speaker 5 (01:00:33):
I don't know if that's a procedure. Finally, Star was waiting,
Star had a knee reporter running out of patients. Yeah,
they Star had somebody that was literally just covering her knees.

Speaker 3 (01:00:50):
She finally had them.

Speaker 4 (01:00:51):
And she finally had them lifted.

Speaker 3 (01:00:53):
OMG, that is truly psychotic. Oh, I'm glad, glad you
were able to reveal that. I mean, that's a failing
on my part as a podcast host not to ask,
and I apologize.

Speaker 4 (01:01:07):
No, No, Bridger, it wasn't Omily.

Speaker 3 (01:01:10):
Thank you for being here. I guess I should. I've
remembered the address you have to go to in order
to buy the game. I believe it's exactly right, Media
dot com, slash shop. If that's not right, that's you'll
find it. We all know how to use the internet
at this point. But you know all that aside. God
bless Omily Gillette. Go find her on Uh, she's got

(01:01:34):
to work all over television and the internet. Go enjoy
all of the goodness she's given to us. And I
guess Happy Thanksgiving. I hope that this doesn't for some
reason air after Thanksgiving because we've gone hard.

Speaker 5 (01:01:48):
We have we have discussed a lot of Thanksgiving topics, but.

Speaker 3 (01:01:52):
That's Thanksgiving is a year round thing. So whatever, all right, Well, Omily,
I'll see you tomorrow at work. Yeah, podcast listener format
in this format and podcast listener, I don't have it,
I guess I don't podcast They often have names for
the listeners. This doesn't have a name for their listener.
What would that even be called? I don't know. Podcast

(01:02:13):
listener feels a little inappropriate at this point. Say gifters, gifters,
gift debts, gift easy. You know, that's not up to me.
I think that that's probably up to the listener to decide.
And what does Lady got Gaga call her fan base monsters?
That could be my listeners. I could just co opt

(01:02:33):
that from her.

Speaker 4 (01:02:34):
You just take it.

Speaker 3 (01:02:37):
Anyway. I'll leave you with that confusing mash of me
just randomly talking, and go out into the world and
enjoy yourselves. Goodbye. I said, no. Gifts isn't exactly right production.
It's engineered by Earth Angel Stephen Ray Morris. The theme
song is by miracle Worker Amy Mann. You can follow
the show on Instagram and Twitter at I said no gifts,

(01:02:58):
and if you have a question or need help getting
a gift for someone in your life, email me at
I said no gifts at gmail dot com. Listen and
subscribe on Apple podcast, Stitcher or wherever you found me,
and why not leave a review while you're at it?

Speaker 5 (01:03:15):
Well, I invit, did you hear?

Speaker 1 (01:03:20):
Thought? I made myself perfectly clear, But you're a guess
to me. You gotta come to me empty And.

Speaker 5 (01:03:32):
I said no guests.

Speaker 1 (01:03:34):
Your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff.
So how did you dad to surbey me?