February 20, 2025 • 38 mins
Em and Gem dive deep into the dark side of social media--cyberbullying. They explore the dangers of the digital world, where people hide behind screens to spread hate, and discuss how online interactions can impact mental health. Em opens up about her own experiences with bullying, sharing how it shaped her and what she's learned. Meanwhile, Gem--ever the fearless space warrior--introduces her tried-and-true Vaseline method for letting the negativity slide right off. And if that wasn't enough, Gem is extra fiery this episode, serving unfiltered takes with zero gravity. Whether you've faced online hate yourself or just want to navigate the web with confidence, buckle up because you are in the right place.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's too easy, I think, to not be accountable for
the things that we share and the things that we
say to each other online. It's a new bullying.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
LGBTQ plus adults are nearly three times more likely to
experience online harassment.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Don't seek external validation. If you like what you see
in the mirror, that's literally all that matters.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Look, I was bullied in school, I know, and to
this day, you know, my parents have both said to me,
you know, why didn't you feel comfortable to share? It's
like I was ashamed.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
It's strange to me that people will stop and take
even a second of their day to comment on somebody's appearance.
I don't. I don't. That one for me is like
goes right over my head. Like that one, I don't
understand completely.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I have somebody actively in my life who I have
a lot of love and care for, and who I
know has a lot of love and care for me,
but has told me to my face with a smile,
that I'm possessed by a demon and that's why I'm gay.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Oh yeah, and no, we are the hard of health ladies, earthlings,
space beings, and those hiding in the comment section welcome
back to in our own world. Today, we're diving deep
(01:18):
into the digital abyss to discuss something that's become all
too common in our connected lives, cyberbullying. It's raw and
real and yep, we're even pulling out some of the
more ruthless, hilarious and bizarre comments that we've received. We're
so happy to be back here with you and ready
to get started.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
Yeah. Wow. Comment section is definitely a dangerous place.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
To be, you know, it could be a great place
to be. It can be a place where conversations are had,
where misinformation is debunked, where we can find similarities in
comedy and find answers to our questions. Think what's actually
(02:01):
going on in a video that you can't really properly interpret? Yeah,
like what was that? What was I supposed to catch there?
Or what was she wearing? Or does anybody know the
name of this song?
Speaker 3 (02:12):
No?
Speaker 2 (02:12):
Yeah, for that, it's useful. I meant more like the
more negative comments, which is a lot of what people
associate when you talking about cyberbullying, because especially because you're
hiding behind essentially the Internet or you know, whatever interface
you're using to communicate, and honestly, like you know, I've
told both you and my mom and certain other people.
(02:33):
You know, because the people that are commenting, they want
you negative things a lot of the time. They want
you to respond, they want to get a rise out
of you. And you have to be really careful about
what you give your energy to. But it's hard. You
have to develop a thick skin and try not to
take certain things personally. Not only you know. Obviously, if
(02:56):
you're in the public eye or if you have a podcast,
you're kind of you know, people would say, oh, you're
asking for it.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
You're never asking for no.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
But I do think that in this day and age,
it should be expected. So it's important to talk about
it for sure, so.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
That we are what's happening. I mean people, Maybe we
should define cyber but yeah, looks through it. So it's
defined as the use of technology to harass, threat, and
embarrass or target another person. Online threats and mean, aggressive
or rude text, tweets, posts, or messages all count. So
it is posting personal information, pictures or videos designed to
hurt or embarrass someone else.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Yeah, like posting videos.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
I think that social media has become like a battleground
in a way for a lot of things. And sometimes
in a positive In a positive light, social media can
illuminate certain issues that maybe we should be talking about.
But I also find that people use social media as
like a tool that with when used with malicious intent,
(03:56):
can destroy lives. Oh yeah, that's a war with no regulation.
But I want to talk a little bit about the
statistics of cyberbullying because I think sometimes older generations are
used to tolerating certain things because they were taught that
tolerating those things equal strength. And thanks to psychology and
(04:17):
the advancements in mental health, we know that that is
actually a traumatic way of thinking, because there are real
life consequences for these things, whether we believe they should
exist or not. So twenty six point five percent of
American teenagers have experienced cyber bullying within the last thirty days.
Seventy three percent of girls and young women have received
(04:40):
unwanted sexual content online. Twenty eight point six of US
females aged thirteen through seventeen have been cyberbullied in the
past month. Over their lifetime, fifty nine point two percent
of girls and forty nine point five percent of boys
age thirteen to seventeen have experienced cyber bullying. Black middle
school age cyber bullying victims are one hundred and thirty
five percent more likely to consider and plan suicide. Bullied
(05:03):
LGBTQ middle and high school students are three times more
likely to attempt suicide in the past year compared to
non bullied peers. Seventy seven point five percent of cyber
bullied students report that someone posted mean or hurtful things
about them online, making it the most prevalent form of
cyber bullying. Thirty percent of teens surveyed over multiple studies
have reported being siluberbullied at some point in their lifetimes,
(05:23):
and in twenty twenty three, sixteen percent of students reported
being bullied electronically, according to the CDC's Youth Risk Behavior
Surveillance System. So it's the new bullying. It's too easy,
i think, to not be accountable for the things that
we share and the things that we say to each
other online. For one, you're a perfect stranger talking to
a perfect stranger. You have no personal connection to that person,
(05:44):
you have no responsibility to them whatsoever, so you think,
and so it's almost like it's easier to loosen the
tongue and say the thing that you would never say
in person, because I think in person we have a
little bit more of our politeness intact. But it's also
I mean true, true, but still but still. And I
(06:05):
think also you have the element of alternate profiles. I've
seen so many people who are are ruthless in what
they say and what they share, and you click on
their profile and they have you know, a stock photo,
zero posts, zero followers, private you know there, and and
(06:27):
it makes you think, you're like, all right, is this
a real person who maybe just doesn't use social media
or are there really people out there who delight in
creating a disguise and creating an account online where they
can spew these hurtful things at other people, whether they
know them, whether they don't, and get away with it,
(06:47):
you know, like they almost enjoy how unchecked it is.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Yeah, we are specifically talking about, you know, cyberbullying and
how exacerbated bullying can be by the tool that is
the internet or online, which you just touched upon. Essentially,
the fact that you can hide behind something because think
about it, for the longest time, you know, gossiping and
(07:15):
all of that has been happening.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
I mean there are a whole multiple decade television shows.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
Where Shakespearean plays, It's back even more, and a lot
of the time it results in people being hurt and
upset at a specific person.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
But when you don't know where to direct the anger,
why it's happening, or where it's coming from, which ultimately
a lot of the time it has to do with
the person that is viewing that hate, you know, whether
it be online or otherwise. But I think it's also
when it's online, there's an element of shame because there's
a lot of you touched on the statistics. But so
(07:58):
much of this happens to young kids and young kids
doing it to each other. Let's be real. And not
only that, I think that even if it's not the
parent's fault at all, and I'm not a parent and
I can't speak to it, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
If I agree there, but please continue.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
I mean, I mean that it's difficult for a lot
of these children to share or they don't share with
their parents. This person is got it sending me in
inappropriate photo. Oh, I made a friend online that seems
really sweet, and all of a sudden starts speaking weird
and starts scaring me and saying things that are you
(08:38):
know what I'm saying a lot of the times that
it's a difficult situation for a child to admit to
the parent that they are recognizing danger because they also
don't want to get in trouble and that can lead
to very dangerous things happening.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Yeah, I mean, and I think that as we get older,
I think it comes easier to let always like to say,
drink a glass of asaline in the morning, so the
things just slide off of you, even though God, I
need to take that advice more because things definitely penetrate.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
Okay, I tell you that all the time. I'm telling
you this for real. You spend a lot of time,
which equals energy in my heart. I controls to people.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
Online, they are be so for real right now. I
do not spend Okay, it is such a misrepresentation of
the truth. I do not spend a lot of time.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I think that a lot of the time is worth
it because ultimately.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Yes, but I would like for you to consider what
you've just said. I do not spend a lot of
time focusing on trolls.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
No, not focusing trying to let's say, somebody wants everything
about me.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
Yeah, I guess so, Okay, So this is what I
want you to say. Okay, So since you're talking about me,
I just want to make sure you speak clearly.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
I got it, and I apologize. I guess for me
on every six months is not a lot of time
because this is hey, this is we're keeping it real.
We're keeping it real, working been, You're real, and that's fine,
I hope everybody.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Okay, See, so I don't spend a lot of time
on trolls, but I will once in a blue.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Moon, okay, and I will rephrase because for me, some apologies,
thank you, jeezy, my apologies for me. Also, one second
of my life and time is too much to spend.
So what I mean is, oftentimes and most of the time,
it's to defend me or you know, somebody you love,
or a cause that you really really care about. You know,
(10:29):
like when you were helping Cuba.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
And all that. Listen when that creator who has a
large platform, I mean, this is not cyberbullying at all,
but who has a super large platform, was educating. He's
a coffee creator, and he was educating on how to
make Cuban coffee and he misrepresented the whole thing. Yeah. Absolutely,
I'm gonna say something and guess what happened. He did
(10:52):
another video. I took the time, and I'm like, not
only is this problematic because of this and this and
this reason. You're speaking on another culture that you don't
identify with, that you don't understand, that you haven't experienced.
And this is a culture that if anything needs a platform.
So if you're gonna do it, do it properly. And
I broke down the right and at all at all.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
No, but there are you know, I'm talking about the
people that call stupid lesbians and hope that we stop living.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
I think that for some people, their parents. There's there
are a lot of parents that in our comments section
who talk about how a shame they would be if
we were their children, right, And I immediately think about
their children when they say those things to me, or
their grandchildren if they're older, and I almost feel like
(11:53):
and and of course, like every situation is unique, and
I and I don't contrary to what you said, I
don't spend a lot of time doing this, but there
have been moments where where I've intuitively sensed that perhaps
a conversation where I can spin their perspective a little
bit or introduce them to a new set of ideas
(12:15):
that clearly they haven't been introduced to, and they see
that this person that you're judging because of their sexuality.
That uses an example, right, is a human is a
human with thoughts and feelings who can level with you.
Nine times out of ten, I've experienced that that person
pulls back because I dive into the perspective of their
(12:39):
child and what it would feel like for their child
or their grandchild to be rejected by them, and what
we're actually doing here. At the end of the day,
I think every human being on earth understands love as
a feeling, even that as a baseline thing. So if
(12:59):
you can draw on those experiences and understand, oh, okay,
maybe I can see it this way, but I've felt
this way and I know what that was like. And
so if I can, if I can attach that feeling
to this thing that I've not experienced that I'm seeing
in these strangers, now I can empathize with that experience. Right,
(13:19):
And perhaps it's easier for me not to cast judgment
because I understand it a little bit better. But ninety
nine percent of the time I do follow my own advice,
and I drink a glass of Vasoline, because we have
this conversation all the time because you know, we read
you and I always read comments. I think it's a
habit that anybody who posts content online has developed, and
(13:42):
maybe we should do some soul searching as to why
we're even looking at them all the validation.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
I don't read them all the time, and if I do,
I really like to which you can attest to. Like,
there's a lot of value in not only people giving
feed back, positive feedback, but also just feedback. That's good
because we talk about it with so many in our
line of work and in our life creators, entertainers. So
(14:11):
much of what we do now is online or expected
to be online, right, And it's kind of like your
decision how private you want to be, how much you
want to share. But fortunately and unfortunately, it's a way
in which to have more people reach our reach, our work,
reach what we do, you know, and that also exposes
(14:34):
you a lot.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
I think social media for me is a mountaintop. It's
like a place to shout your deepest desires and feelings
and interest from. It's like I sometimes it's like a
scream and to avoid Yeah, whether or not anyone is listening.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
I think, and honestly I want to hear from our
listeners because I think an amazing episode which stems from this.
But it's very different for you and media. The conversation
to have is like the responsibility of how to use
the internet, like for example, you know, like I know
that in some places you and I disagree on, like, oh,
what what do you think we should post? What do
(15:12):
you think we should not post? You know, what do
you think we should open up for people to comment about?
You know? Do you post your kids? Do you not
post your kids?
Speaker 1 (15:19):
Which is anything kids is a whole other.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
But anyway, back to my point, I think that opening
up yourself online and reading comments is something that you
need to be prepared for. And like you said, having
the conversation of like do you do you read comments online?
Are you able to read them and have them not
affect you? So that's what I was getting, noticing that
(15:46):
they're affecting you in a negative way.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Right, So the the glass of Asolene thing is like
me personally, I don't think I've ever left a comment
on any one's social media post or anything to degrade
their physical image. No, of course not, or even if
(16:10):
it's like a fashion thing. Like if I see somebody
and i'm you know me, am, I'm critical. I'm very critical,
and I could be very mean.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I understand.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
I was born to be on a roast panel like
the things that the creativity behind my meanness is is grost.
I'm so down, but I think I could be very
creatively mean and I don't hold back. But I would
never find myself even if I truly believed while that
girl looks like shit, I would never say that. I
would never, ever, ever ever say that. I would never
(16:40):
ever It's not worth it to share that feeling, that emotion,
to risk harming that person in that way. It's strange
to me that people will stop and take even a
second of their day to comment on somebody's appearance. I don't.
I don't. That one for me is like goes right
over my head. Like that one I don't understand completely.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
I think that's a really valuable point to dive a
tiny bit deeper into, because I think the majority of
the population or people that were around every day are
not going to be those people that are putting a
hateful comment boom out there. However, like for example, your sister,
you know, my anybody in my family janew Like, I
(17:23):
really don't think that there are very few people in
your life that would actively be like, oh you look
like shit.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
Girl, or like maybe they saw it, but they share.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
That's that's my follow up. I think that.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
I mean, my sister would definitely say it, Amber would
definitely say it.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
No, But I'm saying, like, to really hurt somebody somebody's page, Like,
sometimes I'll open up somebody's page that I admire and
for no reason, there's people having a whole discourse under
the page. And I think that also sometimes people, depending
on who it is that they're commenting on, they're thinking
this person isn't going to see it.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Or maybe they want them to.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
Well, my point is that I don't think that there's
a lot of people out there that are making it
normal to be cyber bullying or just commenting hate online
or sending hate. But the ones that do do it,
they stick out a lot. Number one, And you think
about it a lot, because if you took the time to,
like you said, post it, think about it, type it,
(18:20):
you know, go through with putting it online, then you
really you have That's a very complex thing.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Right, So I think it's I think those are easy.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
It's very complex thing, and some people, unfortunately are just
not are just not well, And it's easy to take
out your frustrations or your angers, or your issues on
something completely intangible that you don't associate with being a real, living,
breathing other person, even in cases of children, because now
(18:52):
just cyber I think about the children so so much
in schools. How much have we been hearing about cyber bullying,
about how many children's lives are lost because instead of
just look, I was bullied in school. I know, and
to this day, you know, my parents have both both
said to me, you know, why didn't you feel comfortable
(19:14):
to share? It's like I was ashamed, you know, you don't.
You don't want to seem like that kid that's weak
and gets picked on. And then the people that you
love worry about your experience in school and it was
very different. You know, one time I was glued to
a chair, you know, and you think about it, it's like,
oh haha, but it feels terrible. I can't imagine. Now
(19:37):
I think about the young people in our lives that
I love, you know, and I think about them potentially
receiving graphic information, graphic visuals that can really impact you,
oh for sure, and stay with you give people PTSD
you know, and gosh, even which this has happened to me,
(20:00):
even unwanted photos from excess. In a way, your phone,
your email, Instagram, that's in a way access to you.
It's an extension. It is absolutely And you have the
choice with some things whether to open a message or
go into the DM or whatnot. But sometimes you don't
(20:21):
have a choice, or you don't realize what the content
or the material is and you open it. I'll give
you an example so it's clear. One time on my
Facebook there was a guy who started off just sending
you know, oh you love your music, love your this.
Then it turned into pictures of him. Then really quickly
(20:42):
it turned into him pleasing himself, like videos of him
pleasing himself, very graphic.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
And he would send them to you.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Yeah, but I didn't know any of that was there. Actually,
it wasn't me that found them. It was my mom
and Heather and they're like, oh my god, and listen,
that's that's jarring, that's horrible. You don't want to be
faced with pornographic content. You don't want to see from
somebody who's actively purposefully sending it.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
I think I've ever heard a single person say m
yay dick pic no ever no.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
But also I'm saying, somebody that purposefully sends it to you,
then you can imagine what the is with the intention
of you or some weird.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
I'm sure they don't send it hoping that you'd be disgusted,
but that's not I don't think that's so much the point.
I think that I think some people say really mean
things with the complete opposite intention, not even to actually
harm you, but desperate for you to notice them. And
we were talking about it the other day, and I
think that probably sparked this idea that we've had people
(21:43):
in our in our comments or in our dms say nasty,
nasty shit, and then you go to respond and they're like,
oh my god, I can't you know, I can't believe
you responded. I love your music. I didn't think that
you would see this. You know, It's which one is it?
Did you? Did you do it because you wanted my
attention or you did it because and now you're you're
(22:05):
back pedaling because you realize that you know there's actually
a human being on the other side of your nasty words.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
But that's actually happened to me in person before. What Yeah,
I told you that lady that saw my ID and
she's like, oh, what a shame, like you look so
great in your ID picture, like you really got to
take care of yourself. You look like shit. Literally, I'm like, lady,
lea me alone. I'm having I'm having a rough day.
I'm tired you no, no, people are just And then
the late this lady taps her on her shoulder and
(22:33):
she was like, oh you know yeah, Oh my god,
I'm eat that gup bana. I'm so sorry this And
I'm like, no, no, girl, you tell me how you really feel,
like own it. At least own it. I'll have more
respect for you there, because for me, it's like shit.
You know, you wonder how to really how do people really?
How do people really feel? But I think in the
case of cyberbuilding, a lot of it is not people's
(22:55):
real feelings. It's actively trying to hurt an active.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Or maybe it is a real feelings. And like I said,
they feel protected by the by their invisible cloak, by
the lack of there's it's hard to trace it back
to them. If somebody tells you something to your face,
you're looking at who's saying it. Right, If somebody sends
something through an online private profile or a made up
profile or a burner account, then they're allowed to shoot
(23:20):
at you and you don't even know who shot from where. Right,
it's just uh, you're you're You're left vulnerable, and sometimes
it can be impactful, even if it doesn't really penetrate
your emotions. I spent a very long time thinking about,
(23:40):
you know, when when you and I first announced our
relationship publicly, which is just like a funny thing in general,
must have been a super slow news day, but you know,
and and and essentially like told the world that we
were a couple, which like, lol, all you had to
do is pay attention for that. The year before, there
(24:00):
were some people who said terrible things to us too,
that wish that we would be raped by an infect
and AIDS infected stick and died, you.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Know, like splintered sticks.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Yeah, that people wishing us. I mean people were genuinely
with passion wishing us death.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
That started to become heavy energetically exactly because it is
energy and we had a lot of love and support.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
We always have overwhelming love and supports and that I
need to be honest so.
Speaker 2 (24:28):
Many people to this day. I mean, I got a
text today that's like, hey, you know, I need your
help and advice with like a gay problem, you know.
And but that energy becomes very, very heavy, And I
can only imagine when it's somebody in your family, like
if it were my child, I would lose my mind.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
Yeah, my mom, I've found my mom in a couple
of common sections saying well, because that's another thing. People
will be like I do. My mo must be so
deceived by having you as a daughter. You're so beautiful,
but what a shame your game. You know that my
mom I know, and my mom who really could not
(25:10):
care less who I was with, you know, man, woman
or otherwise it's just not her, not her. Mo O
loves to enter those opportunities and just remind people like,
I'm her mother and you don't have to speak for me,
and and and she's with somebody who she loves and
that's all I care about.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Well, then we also have the other side of it,
which is, you know, the biblical folk who ironically, you know,
preach so many things and represent so many other things.
And I mean, I have somebody actively in my life
who I have a lot of love and care for,
and who I know has a lot of love and
care for me, but has told me to my face
(26:01):
with a smile that I'm possessed by a demon and
that's why I'm gay.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
Oh yeah, and no, we are the harbingers of hell. No, no,
like the worst thing.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
That like oh yeah, like literally, I'm possessed by a demon.
That's why I'm say. That's why you know I'm sick
and you know, what a shame. But she understand but like,
you know, in the same way that she really feels
and believes that you know has love and care for
me as well, and like they're not one and the same.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
But you can't. It's just people who think that you
can love someone despite their sexuality. This message is for you.
You cannot shopping kart. The people that you love, who
they love and how they love is an indispensable part
of who they are. You can't love them despite anything.
(26:53):
It's because it's with it. That's part of who the
person that you love, So you better love it too exactly.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
That makes you who you are. Yeah, So I mean,
at least I have more respect for the fact that
I can have a conversation face to face with her.
But yeah, I've seen both of our moms in some
of the comments, And yes, it became very heavy. It
became very overwhelming, but the positivity was overwhelming and heavy
in a good way as well.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Let's not lie. You and I are perfect creatures. I'm
certainly far from perfect. Sometimes it feels good to respond. Earlier,
earlier we were preparing for this episode, I was reading
a couple of comments with my producer from years ago
where I was literally like, kiss my ass well because seriously,
sometimes you know, it's probably just it's not very healed
of me to engage, but sometimes it's like, you know what,
(27:43):
fuck off.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
I also get really upset, like realty, when they're talking
about you, or when they're talking about my family or
Sasha whatnot, and when like families in the public eye
and stuff too, or partners of you're an easy target,
I mean easy target. It's easier for people to say
things about or to you and me, And when people
(28:07):
say things about you, I lose it. That's when it's
hard for me to hold back. It's not you know,
it's not helpful, but it does feel a little bit good.
I'm not gonna lie, yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
And that's okay. We're human, you know. Sometimes you got
to tell people to kiss your ass.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
Yeah. And also, if you're in a situation out there
where you feel like you're in danger, doesn't matter your age,
it's really important. You know. The Internet is becoming just
as real of a place as any other because it
leads to real consequences and real emotions that turn into
real trauma. So make sure that you have a resource
(28:43):
available or a person that you can speak to that
can help you if you're in a situation that you
feel unsafe about.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Because and just remember that people usually just project what
they're feeling internally. Anybody who has the time or even
the space or the capacit city to spend their time
tearing you down feels that way probably about themselves, and
so it's difficult to look at it from that lens.
(29:11):
But sometimes the best thing that you can do for
you and for themselves, for whoever it is that's saying
those things, is step into an understanding place and remind
yourself that they must be having some trouble or lacking
some love. Somebody said the other day, well, those people
(29:33):
must not have any pets, you know, really they're they're there.
They must be lacking to be to be filling their
cup with that kind of thing. So you you you
almost have to feel bad, feel bad, and again, drink
a glass of masoline and let it slide right off
of you. Because that famous Quincy quote, not one ounce
(29:54):
of my self worth depends on your acceptance of me.
Don't seek external validation. If you like what you see
in the mirror, that's literally all that matters.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
That quote about Quincy is so true, like you need
to be cool with yourself, and sometimes sometimes that's a
journey that's not only really difficult, but that becomes actively
more difficult when you have youth that are growing up
in a world.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
Yeah, and they don't have the defenses that somebody like
me might.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
And the internet is fully integrated into their life. Yeah,
I got bullied, but I didn't have a phone until
I was seventeen. I wasn't on Instagram. No, our life
was different, So even if somebody was talking shit, it
wasn't like that in my comments and actively all the time,
always at risk, you know, anyway, But the responsibility that
(30:43):
I want to say is talking about the LGBTQ plus
community and more specifically youth, because there's already so many
tools that we're learning how to give our community and
the youth in our community, and when you're trying to
figure out your life or trying to figure out being
transgender or being gay or bisexual or anything that the
(31:08):
world still considers to be unique, which has been around
for so long. So I really understand that. Yeah, cool,
mingos or lesbians. Dolphins are by come on, now, mosquitoes
are what are mosquitoes?
Speaker 1 (31:23):
Mosquitoes are are one of those one of those insects
that I'm like, we couldn't extinct those. We had to
extinct the two can, but we can't extinct mosquitos. Like,
what's up with that?
Speaker 2 (31:32):
You know, we need mosquitos for something important to Mosquite anyway.
All right, So a couple of facts just about our community.
LGBTQ plus adults are nearly three times more likely to
experience online harassment compared to our hetero friends. So that's
a big that's a big number. It's a big number.
(31:55):
Fifty percent of bisexual women have received unwanted behavior online.
I think that's interesting. I mean, half half of the population.
That's pretty. It's tough also because there's a lot of
people who view certain branches of our beautiful tree, of
our beautiful gay tree as a kink of theirs or whatnot,
and they think that that's a past to come after.
(32:17):
That's that's harassment. You know. Thirty five percent of transgender
youth between the age of thirteen and seventeen have been
victims of cyberbulling since June twenty twenty one. Again almost half.
That's it's a lot. That's why, you know, you've got
to be so brave these days to share certain things
(32:38):
about your journey online.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
It takes a lot of courage to step into any
kind of truth publicly. And I don't mean like in
the in the world of like, you know, celebrity. I
mean just like outside of your own mind, outside of
your own maybe you know, microcosm of like you and
your friends or like you know, your your safety, to
be able to like walk out into the streets and
(33:04):
announce something that you know is controversial or still look
down upon or not accepted. As if you could choose tour,
like I said, choose not to accept somebody.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
Well, holding it inside also is not an option, you know,
it's an option, but amental calls it's hurtful. It builds
a lot of resentment.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
Yeah, is it about that time?
Speaker 2 (33:26):
It is about that time? And let me see it
is time of Arissy.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Out of its network spasiness.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Thank you, all right, everybody, Well I'm not everybody's favorite,
out of Space News network. Let's find out what's going
in the stars to what's going on in the stars today,
all right, let's talk dollars and cents in space. While
Starlink is becoming a big money maker for SpaceX, the
company president believes the starship will have a bigger long
term impact financially. Nicki Minaj, however, believes that starships are
(34:07):
meant to fly a a aim.
Speaker 1 (34:12):
They're so good.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
It just the news Space news, all right, I read
what Sorry, definitely not twenty percent, okay. Parata has teamed
up with Axiom Space to design NASA's twenty twenty six
spacesuit for the latest attempted mission to space. Is cool.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
I know.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
I thought that was cool too, and you would like it,
I know. And it's for the missions to the Moon,
which I think is super cool. Also already in the
works for the sequel. Because of this incredible new feat
is everybody's favorite fashion rom com, The Astronaut Wears Prada,
which is said to include a bit more dramatic scenes,
including one where Meryl Streep launches Anne Hathaway into deep
(34:56):
space while she slowly suffocates in a stunning dul cha
in cabana gown. It's gonna be great. The astronauts products
gonna love it. It's gonna be awesome. Can't wait all
these sequels. We're getting inventive. Okay, lastly, in outer space,
recent extensive studies conducted by NASA have proven US humans
(35:16):
don't have a real grasp on the scale or size
of other planets and moons and stars in outer space
compared to US. For example, Pluto is smaller in diameter
than the United States.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Is it really? Is that fake news?
Speaker 2 (35:33):
No, this is one hundred percent real. Look it up
also one hundred percent reel. That may be true, but
the US is confirmed to be more full of shit
than any other known planet or star in the whole universe.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
And this was a great space news.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
We have to start putting out those clips, we really do.
I don't know why we're not sharing space news on
social media, but we're starting. I mean it's common an
it's coming oh right, right right, because it's one hundred
percent news NewSpace news, right right right. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
Okay, Well that was a I loved having this conversation
with you. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
It's not the best topic, no, but it's important.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Yeah, something something good to talk about.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Even if it just empowers somebody to say fuck it. Yeah,
what was your what was your theme song?
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (36:27):
Yeah, I love it. But before we sign off officially,
I do want to say this. If you're experiencing cyber
bullying and need immediate support, text connect to seven four
one seven four one. We also have the crisis text
line dot org, Stop Bullying dot gov, Do Something dot org,
(36:50):
and Stomp out Bullying dot org. These are incredible resources.
If you are experiencing cyber bullying, tell somebody, Tell a friend,
tell a parent, tell the teacher, somebody that you trust.
Don't don't keep it to yourself, don't deal with it alone.
Who knows. If you're a victim of cyber bullying, there's
probably another victim that you can help save from that
(37:13):
by just by just speaking up about it and doing
what you can to protect yourself from it. And if
you can't identify who the person is. The load invented Instagram,
and Instagram invented the block.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Button, so use it, yes, and remember you are so
much stronger and more violable and powerful than that person
hurting you. Don't give them the power over your life
and any more time than they need. And I know
it's difficult, but it's worth it and you're worth it.
So stay safe out there like that. And also, while
(37:45):
you're blocking your haters, go ahead and follow us in
our own little pod and say hello to us and
send over your haters handles and we'll go after that.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Online vigilant.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
Anyway, I love you, We will see you next time.
Here your favorite space cadets flying space in our own world.
Love you right.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Launch. This podcast is brought to you by Moonflower Productions
in partnership with iheartsmicha podcast network. For more podcasts, visit
the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
It's too easy, I think, to not be accountable for
the things that we share and the things that we
say to each other online. It's a new bullying.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
LGBTQ plus adults are nearly three times more likely to
experience online harassment.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Don't seek external validation. If you like what you see
in the mirror, that's literally all that matters.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Look, I was bullied in school, I know, and to
this day, you know, my parents have both said to me,
you know, why didn't you feel comfortable to share? It's
like I was ashamed.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
It's strange to me that people will stop and take
even a second of their day to comment on somebody's appearance.
I don't. I don't. That one for me is like
goes right over my head. Like that one, I don't
understand completely.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I have somebody actively in my life who I have
a lot of love and care for, and who I
know has a lot of love and care for me,
but has told me to my face with a smile,
that I'm possessed by a demon and that's why I'm gay.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Oh yeah, and no, we are the hard of health ladies, earthlings,
space beings, and those hiding in the comment section welcome
back to in our own world. Today, we're diving deep
(01:18):
into the digital abyss to discuss something that's become all
too common in our connected lives, cyberbullying. It's raw and
real and yep, we're even pulling out some of the
more ruthless, hilarious and bizarre comments that we've received. We're
so happy to be back here with you and ready
to get started.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
Yeah. Wow. Comment section is definitely a dangerous place.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
To be, you know, it could be a great place
to be. It can be a place where conversations are had,
where misinformation is debunked, where we can find similarities in
comedy and find answers to our questions. Think what's actually
(02:01):
going on in a video that you can't really properly interpret? Yeah,
like what was that? What was I supposed to catch there?
Or what was she wearing? Or does anybody know the
name of this song?
Speaker 3 (02:12):
No?
Speaker 2 (02:12):
Yeah, for that, it's useful. I meant more like the
more negative comments, which is a lot of what people
associate when you talking about cyberbullying, because especially because you're
hiding behind essentially the Internet or you know, whatever interface
you're using to communicate, and honestly, like you know, I've
told both you and my mom and certain other people.
(02:33):
You know, because the people that are commenting, they want
you negative things a lot of the time. They want
you to respond, they want to get a rise out
of you. And you have to be really careful about
what you give your energy to. But it's hard. You
have to develop a thick skin and try not to
take certain things personally. Not only you know. Obviously, if
(02:56):
you're in the public eye or if you have a podcast,
you're kind of you know, people would say, oh, you're
asking for it.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
You're never asking for no.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
But I do think that in this day and age,
it should be expected. So it's important to talk about
it for sure, so.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
That we are what's happening. I mean people, Maybe we
should define cyber but yeah, looks through it. So it's
defined as the use of technology to harass, threat, and
embarrass or target another person. Online threats and mean, aggressive
or rude text, tweets, posts, or messages all count. So
it is posting personal information, pictures or videos designed to
hurt or embarrass someone else.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Yeah, like posting videos.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
I think that social media has become like a battleground
in a way for a lot of things. And sometimes
in a positive In a positive light, social media can
illuminate certain issues that maybe we should be talking about.
But I also find that people use social media as
like a tool that with when used with malicious intent,
(03:56):
can destroy lives. Oh yeah, that's a war with no regulation.
But I want to talk a little bit about the
statistics of cyberbullying because I think sometimes older generations are
used to tolerating certain things because they were taught that
tolerating those things equal strength. And thanks to psychology and
(04:17):
the advancements in mental health, we know that that is
actually a traumatic way of thinking, because there are real
life consequences for these things, whether we believe they should
exist or not. So twenty six point five percent of
American teenagers have experienced cyber bullying within the last thirty days.
Seventy three percent of girls and young women have received
(04:40):
unwanted sexual content online. Twenty eight point six of US
females aged thirteen through seventeen have been cyberbullied in the
past month. Over their lifetime, fifty nine point two percent
of girls and forty nine point five percent of boys
age thirteen to seventeen have experienced cyber bullying. Black middle
school age cyber bullying victims are one hundred and thirty
five percent more likely to consider and plan suicide. Bullied
(05:03):
LGBTQ middle and high school students are three times more
likely to attempt suicide in the past year compared to
non bullied peers. Seventy seven point five percent of cyber
bullied students report that someone posted mean or hurtful things
about them online, making it the most prevalent form of
cyber bullying. Thirty percent of teens surveyed over multiple studies
have reported being siluberbullied at some point in their lifetimes,
(05:23):
and in twenty twenty three, sixteen percent of students reported
being bullied electronically, according to the CDC's Youth Risk Behavior
Surveillance System. So it's the new bullying. It's too easy,
i think, to not be accountable for the things that
we share and the things that we say to each
other online. For one, you're a perfect stranger talking to
a perfect stranger. You have no personal connection to that person,
(05:44):
you have no responsibility to them whatsoever, so you think,
and so it's almost like it's easier to loosen the
tongue and say the thing that you would never say
in person, because I think in person we have a
little bit more of our politeness intact. But it's also
I mean true, true, but still but still. And I
(06:05):
think also you have the element of alternate profiles. I've
seen so many people who are are ruthless in what
they say and what they share, and you click on
their profile and they have you know, a stock photo,
zero posts, zero followers, private you know there, and and
(06:27):
it makes you think, you're like, all right, is this
a real person who maybe just doesn't use social media
or are there really people out there who delight in
creating a disguise and creating an account online where they
can spew these hurtful things at other people, whether they
know them, whether they don't, and get away with it,
(06:47):
you know, like they almost enjoy how unchecked it is.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Yeah, we are specifically talking about, you know, cyberbullying and
how exacerbated bullying can be by the tool that is
the internet or online, which you just touched upon. Essentially,
the fact that you can hide behind something because think
about it, for the longest time, you know, gossiping and
(07:15):
all of that has been happening.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
I mean there are a whole multiple decade television shows.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
Where Shakespearean plays, It's back even more, and a lot
of the time it results in people being hurt and
upset at a specific person.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
But when you don't know where to direct the anger,
why it's happening, or where it's coming from, which ultimately
a lot of the time it has to do with
the person that is viewing that hate, you know, whether
it be online or otherwise. But I think it's also
when it's online, there's an element of shame because there's
a lot of you touched on the statistics. But so
(07:58):
much of this happens to young kids and young kids
doing it to each other. Let's be real. And not
only that, I think that even if it's not the
parent's fault at all, and I'm not a parent and
I can't speak to it, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
If I agree there, but please continue.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
I mean, I mean that it's difficult for a lot
of these children to share or they don't share with
their parents. This person is got it sending me in
inappropriate photo. Oh, I made a friend online that seems
really sweet, and all of a sudden starts speaking weird
and starts scaring me and saying things that are you
(08:38):
know what I'm saying a lot of the times that
it's a difficult situation for a child to admit to
the parent that they are recognizing danger because they also
don't want to get in trouble and that can lead
to very dangerous things happening.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Yeah, I mean, and I think that as we get older,
I think it comes easier to let always like to say,
drink a glass of asaline in the morning, so the
things just slide off of you, even though God, I
need to take that advice more because things definitely penetrate.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
Okay, I tell you that all the time. I'm telling
you this for real. You spend a lot of time,
which equals energy in my heart. I controls to people.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
Online, they are be so for real right now. I
do not spend Okay, it is such a misrepresentation of
the truth. I do not spend a lot of time.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I think that a lot of the time is worth
it because ultimately.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Yes, but I would like for you to consider what
you've just said. I do not spend a lot of
time focusing on trolls.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
No, not focusing trying to let's say, somebody wants everything
about me.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
Yeah, I guess so, Okay, So this is what I
want you to say. Okay, So since you're talking about me,
I just want to make sure you speak clearly.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
I got it, and I apologize. I guess for me
on every six months is not a lot of time
because this is hey, this is we're keeping it real.
We're keeping it real, working been, You're real, and that's fine,
I hope everybody.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Okay, See, so I don't spend a lot of time
on trolls, but I will once in a blue.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Moon, okay, and I will rephrase because for me, some apologies,
thank you, jeezy, my apologies for me. Also, one second
of my life and time is too much to spend.
So what I mean is, oftentimes and most of the time,
it's to defend me or you know, somebody you love,
or a cause that you really really care about. You know,
(10:29):
like when you were helping Cuba.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
And all that. Listen when that creator who has a
large platform, I mean, this is not cyberbullying at all,
but who has a super large platform, was educating. He's
a coffee creator, and he was educating on how to
make Cuban coffee and he misrepresented the whole thing. Yeah. Absolutely,
I'm gonna say something and guess what happened. He did
(10:52):
another video. I took the time, and I'm like, not
only is this problematic because of this and this and
this reason. You're speaking on another culture that you don't
identify with, that you don't understand, that you haven't experienced.
And this is a culture that if anything needs a platform.
So if you're gonna do it, do it properly. And
I broke down the right and at all at all.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
No, but there are you know, I'm talking about the
people that call stupid lesbians and hope that we stop living.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
I think that for some people, their parents. There's there
are a lot of parents that in our comments section
who talk about how a shame they would be if
we were their children, right, And I immediately think about
their children when they say those things to me, or
their grandchildren if they're older, and I almost feel like
(11:53):
and and of course, like every situation is unique, and
I and I don't contrary to what you said, I
don't spend a lot of time doing this, but there
have been moments where where I've intuitively sensed that perhaps
a conversation where I can spin their perspective a little
bit or introduce them to a new set of ideas
(12:15):
that clearly they haven't been introduced to, and they see
that this person that you're judging because of their sexuality.
That uses an example, right, is a human is a
human with thoughts and feelings who can level with you.
Nine times out of ten, I've experienced that that person
pulls back because I dive into the perspective of their
(12:39):
child and what it would feel like for their child
or their grandchild to be rejected by them, and what
we're actually doing here. At the end of the day,
I think every human being on earth understands love as
a feeling, even that as a baseline thing. So if
(12:59):
you can draw on those experiences and understand, oh, okay,
maybe I can see it this way, but I've felt
this way and I know what that was like. And
so if I can, if I can attach that feeling
to this thing that I've not experienced that I'm seeing
in these strangers, now I can empathize with that experience. Right,
(13:19):
And perhaps it's easier for me not to cast judgment
because I understand it a little bit better. But ninety
nine percent of the time I do follow my own advice,
and I drink a glass of Vasoline, because we have
this conversation all the time because you know, we read
you and I always read comments. I think it's a
habit that anybody who posts content online has developed, and
(13:42):
maybe we should do some soul searching as to why
we're even looking at them all the validation.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
I don't read them all the time, and if I do,
I really like to which you can attest to. Like,
there's a lot of value in not only people giving
feed back, positive feedback, but also just feedback. That's good
because we talk about it with so many in our
line of work and in our life creators, entertainers. So
(14:11):
much of what we do now is online or expected
to be online, right, And it's kind of like your
decision how private you want to be, how much you
want to share. But fortunately and unfortunately, it's a way
in which to have more people reach our reach, our work,
reach what we do, you know, and that also exposes
(14:34):
you a lot.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
I think social media for me is a mountaintop. It's
like a place to shout your deepest desires and feelings
and interest from. It's like I sometimes it's like a
scream and to avoid Yeah, whether or not anyone is listening.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
I think, and honestly I want to hear from our
listeners because I think an amazing episode which stems from this.
But it's very different for you and media. The conversation
to have is like the responsibility of how to use
the internet, like for example, you know, like I know
that in some places you and I disagree on, like, oh,
what what do you think we should post? What do
(15:12):
you think we should not post? You know, what do
you think we should open up for people to comment about?
You know? Do you post your kids? Do you not
post your kids?
Speaker 1 (15:19):
Which is anything kids is a whole other.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
But anyway, back to my point, I think that opening
up yourself online and reading comments is something that you
need to be prepared for. And like you said, having
the conversation of like do you do you read comments online?
Are you able to read them and have them not
affect you? So that's what I was getting, noticing that
(15:46):
they're affecting you in a negative way.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
Right, So the the glass of Asolene thing is like
me personally, I don't think I've ever left a comment
on any one's social media post or anything to degrade
their physical image. No, of course not, or even if
(16:10):
it's like a fashion thing. Like if I see somebody
and i'm you know me, am, I'm critical. I'm very critical,
and I could be very mean.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I understand.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
I was born to be on a roast panel like
the things that the creativity behind my meanness is is grost.
I'm so down, but I think I could be very
creatively mean and I don't hold back. But I would
never find myself even if I truly believed while that
girl looks like shit, I would never say that. I
would never, ever, ever ever say that. I would never
(16:40):
ever It's not worth it to share that feeling, that emotion,
to risk harming that person in that way. It's strange
to me that people will stop and take even a
second of their day to comment on somebody's appearance. I don't.
I don't. That one for me is like goes right
over my head. Like that one I don't understand completely.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
I think that's a really valuable point to dive a
tiny bit deeper into, because I think the majority of
the population or people that were around every day are
not going to be those people that are putting a
hateful comment boom out there. However, like for example, your sister,
you know, my anybody in my family janew Like, I
(17:23):
really don't think that there are very few people in
your life that would actively be like, oh you look
like shit.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
Girl, or like maybe they saw it, but they share.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
That's that's my follow up. I think that.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
I mean, my sister would definitely say it, Amber would
definitely say it.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
No, But I'm saying, like, to really hurt somebody somebody's page, Like,
sometimes I'll open up somebody's page that I admire and
for no reason, there's people having a whole discourse under
the page. And I think that also sometimes people, depending
on who it is that they're commenting on, they're thinking
this person isn't going to see it.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Or maybe they want them to.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
Well, my point is that I don't think that there's
a lot of people out there that are making it
normal to be cyber bullying or just commenting hate online
or sending hate. But the ones that do do it,
they stick out a lot. Number one, And you think
about it a lot, because if you took the time to,
like you said, post it, think about it, type it,
(18:20):
you know, go through with putting it online, then you
really you have That's a very complex thing.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Right, So I think it's I think those are easy.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
It's very complex thing, and some people, unfortunately are just
not are just not well, And it's easy to take
out your frustrations or your angers, or your issues on
something completely intangible that you don't associate with being a real, living,
breathing other person, even in cases of children, because now
(18:52):
just cyber I think about the children so so much
in schools. How much have we been hearing about cyber bullying,
about how many children's lives are lost because instead of
just look, I was bullied in school. I know, and
to this day, you know, my parents have both both
said to me, you know, why didn't you feel comfortable
(19:14):
to share? It's like I was ashamed, you know, you don't.
You don't want to seem like that kid that's weak
and gets picked on. And then the people that you
love worry about your experience in school and it was
very different. You know, one time I was glued to
a chair, you know, and you think about it, it's like,
oh haha, but it feels terrible. I can't imagine. Now
(19:37):
I think about the young people in our lives that
I love, you know, and I think about them potentially
receiving graphic information, graphic visuals that can really impact you,
oh for sure, and stay with you give people PTSD
you know, and gosh, even which this has happened to me,
(20:00):
even unwanted photos from excess. In a way, your phone,
your email, Instagram, that's in a way access to you.
It's an extension. It is absolutely And you have the
choice with some things whether to open a message or
go into the DM or whatnot. But sometimes you don't
(20:21):
have a choice, or you don't realize what the content
or the material is and you open it. I'll give
you an example so it's clear. One time on my
Facebook there was a guy who started off just sending
you know, oh you love your music, love your this.
Then it turned into pictures of him. Then really quickly
(20:42):
it turned into him pleasing himself, like videos of him
pleasing himself, very graphic.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
And he would send them to you.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Yeah, but I didn't know any of that was there. Actually,
it wasn't me that found them. It was my mom
and Heather and they're like, oh my god, and listen,
that's that's jarring, that's horrible. You don't want to be
faced with pornographic content. You don't want to see from
somebody who's actively purposefully sending it.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
I think I've ever heard a single person say m
yay dick pic no ever no.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
But also I'm saying, somebody that purposefully sends it to you,
then you can imagine what the is with the intention
of you or some weird.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
I'm sure they don't send it hoping that you'd be disgusted,
but that's not I don't think that's so much the point.
I think that I think some people say really mean
things with the complete opposite intention, not even to actually
harm you, but desperate for you to notice them. And
we were talking about it the other day, and I
think that probably sparked this idea that we've had people
(21:43):
in our in our comments or in our dms say nasty,
nasty shit, and then you go to respond and they're like,
oh my god, I can't you know, I can't believe
you responded. I love your music. I didn't think that
you would see this. You know, It's which one is it?
Did you? Did you do it because you wanted my
attention or you did it because and now you're you're
(22:05):
back pedaling because you realize that you know there's actually
a human being on the other side of your nasty words.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
But that's actually happened to me in person before. What Yeah,
I told you that lady that saw my ID and
she's like, oh, what a shame, like you look so
great in your ID picture, like you really got to
take care of yourself. You look like shit. Literally, I'm like, lady,
lea me alone. I'm having I'm having a rough day.
I'm tired you no, no, people are just And then
the late this lady taps her on her shoulder and
(22:33):
she was like, oh you know yeah, Oh my god,
I'm eat that gup bana. I'm so sorry this And
I'm like, no, no, girl, you tell me how you really feel,
like own it. At least own it. I'll have more
respect for you there, because for me, it's like shit.
You know, you wonder how to really how do people really?
How do people really feel? But I think in the
case of cyberbuilding, a lot of it is not people's
(22:55):
real feelings. It's actively trying to hurt an active.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Or maybe it is a real feelings. And like I said,
they feel protected by the by their invisible cloak, by
the lack of there's it's hard to trace it back
to them. If somebody tells you something to your face,
you're looking at who's saying it. Right, If somebody sends
something through an online private profile or a made up
profile or a burner account, then they're allowed to shoot
(23:20):
at you and you don't even know who shot from where. Right,
it's just uh, you're you're You're left vulnerable, and sometimes
it can be impactful, even if it doesn't really penetrate
your emotions. I spent a very long time thinking about,
(23:40):
you know, when when you and I first announced our
relationship publicly, which is just like a funny thing in general,
must have been a super slow news day, but you know,
and and and essentially like told the world that we
were a couple, which like, lol, all you had to
do is pay attention for that. The year before, there
(24:00):
were some people who said terrible things to us too,
that wish that we would be raped by an infect
and AIDS infected stick and died, you.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Know, like splintered sticks.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Yeah, that people wishing us. I mean people were genuinely
with passion wishing us death.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
That started to become heavy energetically exactly because it is
energy and we had a lot of love and support.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
We always have overwhelming love and supports and that I
need to be honest so.
Speaker 2 (24:28):
Many people to this day. I mean, I got a
text today that's like, hey, you know, I need your
help and advice with like a gay problem, you know.
And but that energy becomes very, very heavy, And I
can only imagine when it's somebody in your family, like
if it were my child, I would lose my mind.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
Yeah, my mom, I've found my mom in a couple
of common sections saying well, because that's another thing. People
will be like I do. My mo must be so
deceived by having you as a daughter. You're so beautiful,
but what a shame your game. You know that my
mom I know, and my mom who really could not
(25:10):
care less who I was with, you know, man, woman
or otherwise it's just not her, not her. Mo O
loves to enter those opportunities and just remind people like,
I'm her mother and you don't have to speak for me,
and and and she's with somebody who she loves and
that's all I care about.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Well, then we also have the other side of it,
which is, you know, the biblical folk who ironically, you know,
preach so many things and represent so many other things.
And I mean, I have somebody actively in my life
who I have a lot of love and care for,
and who I know has a lot of love and
care for me, but has told me to my face
(26:01):
with a smile that I'm possessed by a demon and
that's why I'm gay.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
Oh yeah, and no, we are the harbingers of hell. No, no,
like the worst thing.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
That like oh yeah, like literally, I'm possessed by a demon.
That's why I'm say. That's why you know I'm sick
and you know, what a shame. But she understand but like,
you know, in the same way that she really feels
and believes that you know has love and care for
me as well, and like they're not one and the same.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
But you can't. It's just people who think that you
can love someone despite their sexuality. This message is for you.
You cannot shopping kart. The people that you love, who
they love and how they love is an indispensable part
of who they are. You can't love them despite anything.
(26:53):
It's because it's with it. That's part of who the
person that you love, So you better love it too exactly.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
That makes you who you are. Yeah, So I mean,
at least I have more respect for the fact that
I can have a conversation face to face with her.
But yeah, I've seen both of our moms in some
of the comments, And yes, it became very heavy. It
became very overwhelming, but the positivity was overwhelming and heavy
in a good way as well.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Let's not lie. You and I are perfect creatures. I'm
certainly far from perfect. Sometimes it feels good to respond. Earlier,
earlier we were preparing for this episode, I was reading
a couple of comments with my producer from years ago
where I was literally like, kiss my ass well because seriously,
sometimes you know, it's probably just it's not very healed
of me to engage, but sometimes it's like, you know what,
(27:43):
fuck off.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
I also get really upset, like realty, when they're talking
about you, or when they're talking about my family or
Sasha whatnot, and when like families in the public eye
and stuff too, or partners of you're an easy target,
I mean easy target. It's easier for people to say
things about or to you and me, And when people
(28:07):
say things about you, I lose it. That's when it's
hard for me to hold back. It's not you know,
it's not helpful, but it does feel a little bit good.
I'm not gonna lie, yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
And that's okay. We're human, you know. Sometimes you got
to tell people to kiss your ass.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
Yeah. And also, if you're in a situation out there
where you feel like you're in danger, doesn't matter your age,
it's really important. You know. The Internet is becoming just
as real of a place as any other because it
leads to real consequences and real emotions that turn into
real trauma. So make sure that you have a resource
(28:43):
available or a person that you can speak to that
can help you if you're in a situation that you
feel unsafe about.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Because and just remember that people usually just project what
they're feeling internally. Anybody who has the time or even
the space or the capacit city to spend their time
tearing you down feels that way probably about themselves, and
so it's difficult to look at it from that lens.
(29:11):
But sometimes the best thing that you can do for
you and for themselves, for whoever it is that's saying
those things, is step into an understanding place and remind
yourself that they must be having some trouble or lacking
some love. Somebody said the other day, well, those people
(29:33):
must not have any pets, you know, really they're they're there.
They must be lacking to be to be filling their
cup with that kind of thing. So you you you
almost have to feel bad, feel bad, and again, drink
a glass of masoline and let it slide right off
of you. Because that famous Quincy quote, not one ounce
(29:54):
of my self worth depends on your acceptance of me.
Don't seek external validation. If you like what you see
in the mirror, that's literally all that matters.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
That quote about Quincy is so true, like you need
to be cool with yourself, and sometimes sometimes that's a
journey that's not only really difficult, but that becomes actively
more difficult when you have youth that are growing up
in a world.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
Yeah, and they don't have the defenses that somebody like
me might.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
And the internet is fully integrated into their life. Yeah,
I got bullied, but I didn't have a phone until
I was seventeen. I wasn't on Instagram. No, our life
was different, So even if somebody was talking shit, it
wasn't like that in my comments and actively all the time,
always at risk, you know, anyway, But the responsibility that
(30:43):
I want to say is talking about the LGBTQ plus
community and more specifically youth, because there's already so many
tools that we're learning how to give our community and
the youth in our community, and when you're trying to
figure out your life or trying to figure out being
transgender or being gay or bisexual or anything that the
(31:08):
world still considers to be unique, which has been around
for so long. So I really understand that. Yeah, cool,
mingos or lesbians. Dolphins are by come on, now, mosquitoes
are what are mosquitoes?
Speaker 1 (31:23):
Mosquitoes are are one of those one of those insects
that I'm like, we couldn't extinct those. We had to
extinct the two can, but we can't extinct mosquitos. Like,
what's up with that?
Speaker 2 (31:32):
You know, we need mosquitos for something important to Mosquite anyway.
All right, So a couple of facts just about our community.
LGBTQ plus adults are nearly three times more likely to
experience online harassment compared to our hetero friends. So that's
a big that's a big number. It's a big number.
(31:55):
Fifty percent of bisexual women have received unwanted behavior online.
I think that's interesting. I mean, half half of the population.
That's pretty. It's tough also because there's a lot of
people who view certain branches of our beautiful tree, of
our beautiful gay tree as a kink of theirs or whatnot,
and they think that that's a past to come after.
(32:17):
That's that's harassment. You know. Thirty five percent of transgender
youth between the age of thirteen and seventeen have been
victims of cyberbulling since June twenty twenty one. Again almost half.
That's it's a lot. That's why, you know, you've got
to be so brave these days to share certain things
(32:38):
about your journey online.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
It takes a lot of courage to step into any
kind of truth publicly. And I don't mean like in
the in the world of like, you know, celebrity. I
mean just like outside of your own mind, outside of
your own maybe you know, microcosm of like you and
your friends or like you know, your your safety, to
be able to like walk out into the streets and
(33:04):
announce something that you know is controversial or still look
down upon or not accepted. As if you could choose tour,
like I said, choose not to accept somebody.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
Well, holding it inside also is not an option, you know,
it's an option, but amental calls it's hurtful. It builds
a lot of resentment.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
Yeah, is it about that time?
Speaker 2 (33:26):
It is about that time? And let me see it
is time of Arissy.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Out of its network spasiness.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Thank you, all right, everybody, Well I'm not everybody's favorite,
out of Space News network. Let's find out what's going
in the stars to what's going on in the stars today,
all right, let's talk dollars and cents in space. While
Starlink is becoming a big money maker for SpaceX, the
company president believes the starship will have a bigger long
term impact financially. Nicki Minaj, however, believes that starships are
(34:07):
meant to fly a a aim.
Speaker 1 (34:12):
They're so good.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
It just the news Space news, all right, I read
what Sorry, definitely not twenty percent, okay. Parata has teamed
up with Axiom Space to design NASA's twenty twenty six
spacesuit for the latest attempted mission to space. Is cool.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
I know.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
I thought that was cool too, and you would like it,
I know. And it's for the missions to the Moon,
which I think is super cool. Also already in the
works for the sequel. Because of this incredible new feat
is everybody's favorite fashion rom com, The Astronaut Wears Prada,
which is said to include a bit more dramatic scenes,
including one where Meryl Streep launches Anne Hathaway into deep
(34:56):
space while she slowly suffocates in a stunning dul cha
in cabana gown. It's gonna be great. The astronauts products
gonna love it. It's gonna be awesome. Can't wait all
these sequels. We're getting inventive. Okay, lastly, in outer space,
recent extensive studies conducted by NASA have proven US humans
(35:16):
don't have a real grasp on the scale or size
of other planets and moons and stars in outer space
compared to US. For example, Pluto is smaller in diameter
than the United States.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Is it really? Is that fake news?
Speaker 2 (35:33):
No, this is one hundred percent real. Look it up
also one hundred percent reel. That may be true, but
the US is confirmed to be more full of shit
than any other known planet or star in the whole universe.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
And this was a great space news.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
We have to start putting out those clips, we really do.
I don't know why we're not sharing space news on
social media, but we're starting. I mean it's common an
it's coming oh right, right right, because it's one hundred
percent news NewSpace news, right right right. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
Okay, Well that was a I loved having this conversation
with you. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
It's not the best topic, no, but it's important.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Yeah, something something good to talk about.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Even if it just empowers somebody to say fuck it. Yeah,
what was your what was your theme song?
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (36:27):
Yeah, I love it. But before we sign off officially,
I do want to say this. If you're experiencing cyber
bullying and need immediate support, text connect to seven four
one seven four one. We also have the crisis text
line dot org, Stop Bullying dot gov, Do Something dot org,
(36:50):
and Stomp out Bullying dot org. These are incredible resources.
If you are experiencing cyber bullying, tell somebody, Tell a friend,
tell a parent, tell the teacher, somebody that you trust.
Don't don't keep it to yourself, don't deal with it alone.
Who knows. If you're a victim of cyber bullying, there's
probably another victim that you can help save from that
(37:13):
by just by just speaking up about it and doing
what you can to protect yourself from it. And if
you can't identify who the person is. The load invented Instagram,
and Instagram invented the block.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Button, so use it, yes, and remember you are so
much stronger and more violable and powerful than that person
hurting you. Don't give them the power over your life
and any more time than they need. And I know
it's difficult, but it's worth it and you're worth it.
So stay safe out there like that. And also, while
(37:45):
you're blocking your haters, go ahead and follow us in
our own little pod and say hello to us and
send over your haters handles and we'll go after that.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Online vigilant.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
Anyway, I love you, We will see you next time.
Here your favorite space cadets flying space in our own world.
Love you right.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Launch. This podcast is brought to you by Moonflower Productions
in partnership with iheartsmicha podcast network. For more podcasts, visit
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Hosts And Creators
Gemeny Hernandez
Emily Estefan
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