July 27, 2022 • 47 mins
There's been a passenger hiding in our engine room this whole time. A guest who--you may or may not have noticed--has appeared on more than one episode so far. The Comet Cousin makes an appearance to talk celebrity spawn, secret skydiving, ASMR breaks, and much more.
Featuring: Lina Luaces
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
I have you the same. Let's go to a man
one already ready for rendering it a theme launching. Well, well,
(00:31):
well the time has come. Look what the cat tracked in.
Some of you may have realized, or may not have realized,
that there has been a person lurking in the shadows
of our show since its inception. Lena has been a
part of not one, not two, but three of our
(00:51):
podcast spontaneously, spontaneously, completely unplanned. Let's run it back, accessing files.
She's there though, she's there though, right? What's up? Each Lena? Okay,
your mom, your your mom can't hear us, right, she's
sitting next to me. We're gonna prank call her. Hi.
(01:20):
I'm going to say my guilty pleasure? What is your
guilty pleasure? My parts smell good sometimes? Wow? Free entry complete?
Did you guess? Lena Luis's what the comment of our show?
(01:41):
The comment cousin herself Rima la prima, Lena lima Bean
Luaz's I'm so excited it's my first podcast. Welcome podcast, Verge,
thanks for taking my podcast, Virginity. We're gonna pod I
was gonna say pod cast your cherry, but that's there's
(02:04):
like something like our family is listening to this. Oh yeah,
as if your mom isn't out there talking about sex.
There's nothing wrong with that, by the way, nothing right.
But you know, I don't think they'll think much of
what we have to say here today. So Lena's really
special because other than being Lena, other than being Leo,
very very very very special things about her, she is
(02:26):
not You guys don't, at least from my observation of
being around for the last almost six years that I know.
D I know, trust me, but you guys are not
like your typical cousins. M's lack of siblings in her
age group made it so that you guys kind of
grew up, you know, like closer. I would. I would
(02:47):
say that you and Lordon are like MS sibling. Yeah,
I completely agree. She's like the third short. When Jem
was like, I don't know, you have not in common,
I'm like, well, I'm two ft and lead us nine.
We look really funny next to each other, which is
incredible because I don't know where that tall moment came from.
(03:10):
But over here we need some of those. If you
just trunk Kate, like the bottom third of your legs,
I would be normal height and you'd still be tall. No, yeah,
I know. It's the craziest thing. When I was walking in,
I was on the bottom stair and you guys were
on the top stair, and you guys were finally looking
at me. I literally said, Lena, I don't think this
will ever happen again. You guys, give me a hugget
(03:31):
straight into my boobs. I was about to say, your
eyes are just your boobs for me. Oh, I forgot
there's an upstairs. But yeah, no, you should post a
picture of just like all of us. She was off
the same height, so that people really understand pure of
me and your mom. Oh that's something else. I thought
it was photoshopped. It's a whole foot different. And then
(03:53):
when she showed it to me on her phone, I'm like, oh,
especially know how to know a photoshop. It's definitely real.
But yeah, jim I, Lording and Lena are definitely more
like siblings to me. I mean I remember being there
the day you both were born, and you even more
so old. No, I mean, no, you're older, but it's
(04:14):
not even that we're all still young. Stop trying to
kill us. But the point is that you're older. No,
the day that you guys were born, I was there
and I even remember carrying lording. There's pictures. But when
you were born, I was older, and I'm obsessed. I
bring it up all the time because I remember when
we would take you to Vero Beach and we had
(04:34):
this little plastic bathtub. Probably no, not that, not that.
Wait a minute, I would you see Lena thinks of
shadier than I am. I would never do you that
dirty on the podcast, all right, some lines you don't cross,
and I'll leave that to your imagination. And yes it
(04:55):
involved a potato. No, just get away. No, this was
a sweet thing, you demons. Oh gosh, it's the only
thing I have that in Cuban coffee. And we would
you were like my little doll. I would bathe you.
I will say that you did look like the michelin man.
(05:18):
Oh my god, you were a huge but really cute.
I would wear one year old clothes when I was
like three months. Really, poor mother. I wear that clothes now, No,
her poor mother. That was okay, So that was the
beginning of my relationship with Lena. We're driving to the
house on the beach. We rem with my dad and
(05:40):
your mom was about to pop right, but we didn't
think it would be anytime soon. You know, there was
still time, we thought. And we're literally turning into the
island and your mom calls. She's like, hey, um, Lena's coming,
like going to the hospital and we're like, oh my god,
like we're going to turn around and go, and she's
(06:01):
like it's probably gonna be a long time, like, ain't
no thing whatever, I kid you not. By the time
we got to the hospital, they were like, she's like
everybody said it was the fastest birth that they walked
into the room to like say good luck to my mom.
They walked out and they were like, okay, come back in.
Her screams in twenty seconds. And the joke was that
(06:22):
there needed to be a red carpet under her because
your mom was watching TV and she literally left the
TV on popped you out. I don't know if you
were like covered in a sack of butter or whoof,
but she doesn't like poo right out of her. And
then we were like, oh, okay, so you entered this
world flying fast girl, and they made bets on my
hair color. Did you know about that? Of course, you
(06:43):
know how Lodan has jet black hair, so does my dad,
and my mom's the only blonde one. I came out
with jet black hair and myda was like, she's going
to be blonde. Yeah, she was like, she's going to
be blond. And everyone was like, you're crazy, look at
her hair, Look at lodan, she's gonna have black hair.
And she was like, no, I had a dream that
she came out and she had long blonde hair like
(07:05):
my hair right now. She was like, I had a
dream that she was a child, but she had super
long blonde hair. And for the first four years of
my life I had black hair. And my mom said
one day she was brushing my hair and she just
saw a blonde curl and it started coming out blonder
and blonder. My hair started growing out blonde, and I
was like, I told you guys, they would keep that.
And she photoshopped a picture of me with blonde hair.
(07:26):
She said that she's going to try to find it.
I want to find it. But anyway, Lena would be
michelin Man. Lena two years old, would did she you
had this attitude? Girls? My god, you wouldn't say good morning.
You just wanted nothing to do with anybody, and you
would come and say at the breakfast table, will be like,
good morning, Lena, Hello, and then this was your response. No,
(07:50):
get at the scene and you go the williest man.
You smell back. I mean, but I really got to us,
like would be like ha ha. Then do you think
that the person actually smelled bad or leta was just leading?
That's what I was about to say. Like people would
laugh and then walk away, like smelling their pits, Like
(08:10):
is this two year old onto something? I feel like
insults hurt more from little kids because they're true. That's
why I'm asking. I have no awareness. They just say
what's on their mind. But I would say it to everyone.
I think maybe one person smelled bad and then I
saw how hurt they got from it, and I was like,
I can use this on anyone. But I was two
years old, so I don't know what I was thinking, like,
(08:32):
but I like a lead plotting. I was a double child.
I would set off the alarm at night from screaming
so loud because we had a lock on the outside
of my door. My mom said they would have to
turn off the alarm at night because I would throw
and just scream and the alarm would go off. The
police would call the house because the alarm would go
off so many times that they thought someone was breaking in.
(08:53):
To this day, my room still has a lock on
the outside of the door because I would climb out
of my crib and like leave my room in the
middle of the night and just walk around in my
diaper Like I mean, you were like four ft tall
at age two. No, I would climb out of my crib.
I would just jump out, So they put a lock
on the outside of my door, and then when I
would not be able to get out, I'd just start screaming.
The alarm would go off and they'd come open the door,
(09:14):
and yeah, cops called on you. Since two years old.
You know what's really really sad that I think about
a lot, And this is just me being me right now,
that there's a point in your life that your parents
like pick you up for the last time, and do
(09:36):
they know that that's the last time that they'll pick
you up. I jumped on my mom yesterday, so you're
like absolutely, yeah, no, but not when she's standing. She'll
just be sitting at the dinner table and I'll just
like sit on her and I'm like three times in
her size I'm just like sitting on her lap, and
she's like, what are you doing? Like, I don't want
to want to be the last time that you picked
(09:56):
me up, because I read that somewhere too. It's so
sad everybody picks me up because I'm pick up a bull. Yes,
I can probably fit in the average person's pocket. You're
an easy pickup. I don't know. I feel like people
see my small frame and are just like I'd like
to hoist her, just if to try. You know, I
(10:18):
can't relate. Actually, I'd love to try to pick you up.
I don't think you could. Let's do it right now,
do it? Oh my god, we're taking her headphones off.
Challenge accepted. Oh my god. Lina is officially out of
(10:38):
frame for those of you wondering. Yep, okay, and up.
And she picked her up, but Lena kind of had
to help because if not, her legs would still reach
the floor because she's just that tall headphone. All right,
settle down, ladies. Jem you you've known Lena it. What's
(11:00):
your favorite Lena memory? To be honest with you, I
don't think that I can top what happened last week.
I don't think anything will top that for a while.
Oh god, can I say it? Whatever? Oh my god? Okay,
So so we just went to we went to go
look at a property that Lena's mom just got. Lena
(11:21):
called me and was like come over, and we're like, okay,
sure whatever. This property has multiple bedrooms, multiple bathrooms. It
was recently acquired, so you know, I'm sure that it
is not to the highest clean stick cleaning standards, but
it's clean as most new purchases are. Lena probably like
(11:42):
five minutes into us arriving there, bulson Aside is like, guys,
I really really have to pee. Me and I'm kind
of looking at each other, look at Lina. We're like,
good thing that we're at a house with a bunch
of bathrooms, and the just like, no, the thing is
is that I can't pee in the bathroom because there's
a roach there. It's a dead roach, was a rod.
(12:04):
If there's one, there's more. Okay, they travel in pairs,
you're not wrong. You're not wrong. When there's one, there's more.
But there was only one roach and it was already dead,
and you were talking about one of several bathrooms. So
instead of like I don't know, getting rid of the
roach or say, going to another bathroom. Lena doesn't even
(12:28):
grab toilet paper, doesn't even grab paper, towels, doesn't anything.
Literally goes to the side of the house, pulls out
aroundnywhere and starts peeing. It was easy because I was
wearing a dress. I was just like, but you wouldn't.
You didn't even make you don't even aid. You didn't
even make it to the grass. You were just like
straight up peeing on the asphalt. So they all start
(12:49):
trying to walk to the side of the house and
no over here. They're like, why we want to see
the house. They're like stop and you're just here like
the putta of peebecomes a river like down the floor. Clearly, wow,
yeah that was And by the way, the bathrooms were fine.
And also, Jim, you shady girl, you hate roaches. I
(13:13):
don't think that you'd be in the bathroom with a
roach in it, But I certainly wouldn't pee in the
concrete beside my house. I will continue to pee on
the side of But why did you go to the
other bathrooms? Because if there's one, there's more, So you
were afraid of encountering more roaches and other bathrooms I
wasn't afraid clean attract what you fear, but I definitely
(13:37):
did not want to counter another one her cock You
attract what you fear, So then I just took an
alternate route, a nature scenic route. Hey, can I fertilize
the plants? Would you rather quick? Would you rather wake
up with a giant cockroach crawling up your naked body
(13:59):
in almost near your mouth? Because if you feel legs,
you're sleeping naked and the giant cock role just climbing
up your body, and right when you wake up, it's
a little front gritter legs are going into your mouth
and going around your bottom teeth. Would you rather that?
(14:19):
You give the worst? Would questions? Or you never have
to encounter a cock roach in nature ever again? But
that's all you can eat for the rest of your life.
What's wrong with you? Neither? Thanks for us? She gives
the worst? Would you rather? I still have this one
(14:40):
ingrained in my mind. I was like nine years old
when you told me this, and I still to this day.
I asked my friends, because it's so horrible, tell me
if you remember, would you rather slide down a pool
of razor blades? A slide of razor blades into a
pool of rubbing alcohol, so like you have scratches all
over your body and then yeah cuts, and then you
go into a pool of rubbing alcohol hydrogen peroxide and
(15:03):
you have to stay in there or put toothpicks under
each of your nails and kick a wall us it. Wow.
So first of all recycled, and second of all, you
are single handedly responsible for most of leader's trauma if
you're a little young for them. Maybe you think I
was falling asleep just visualizing, and I was like, oh god,
(15:26):
I'm sorry. I still look, I'll pay for like three
therapy lessons. You also three I'll pay lessons. I'll pay
for three therapy lessons. Yeah, you know you should have
You know you should have paid for that. You probably
traumatized her another way by leading her to believe that
(15:48):
she could be a singer. Is you should have paid
for singing lessons after that recording. Wow, she's gone there
have it on you please. I actually thought I was
going to get signed. Guys. I was like, oh my god,
I'm so good because Emily let you believe that there
is such thing as too nice. I was in the
(16:11):
studio and she was just outside dying of Okay. First
of all, the studio was the bathroom in my playroom.
Yeah that is. I just remember opening the bathroom door
and there's just like a huge mic stand and I'm like, yes,
my moment, listen, this is. This is like some of
my first intro to engineering and recording because I would
(16:32):
have my laptop and I was your labra. No, you
were my muse. Wow. Okay. So I had these like
karaoke tracks and I would put Lena and run this
like crazy thirt tiny eighth inch cable so she could
listen right and put her in the bathroom or the
closet or whatever, and she would do this the next
(16:58):
Rihanna mean wait for this note. The last the last
(17:30):
one is my favorite. Listen to the no listen, Listen
to the outro, listen, listen to this my last note,
the last one. Listen, and the mix is called We
(17:54):
Found Lena. We Found the EQ is not too bad.
Oh my god, Emily, Oh my god. Leta. First of all,
we were You're so cute, but I was older. That's
that's the part that isn't cute. I was like a
teenager already. You sounded so little. I was like probably no, no, no,
(18:16):
no no, because I was like eleven Lima. I was
like eleven Lima being Luaza's you were a little how little?
Because I was singing it, re sent me that right now,
resent me right now. I'm going to remix that ship
and we're going to bring it back. Wow. I like
played in the car with my friends. We're just driving
somewhere and I play it and they're like, who is this?
(18:37):
I'm like, guess that's beautiful. You'd always be down though,
I'd love that, like you'd always be down for my ship.
I had the best time with you, I know. Remember that.
Lena and hate because Lord was being mean to me,
so we would write a song and would write a
song to make me feel better. Lida am hate lot.
It was being a bungo. That's right, Lena. Okay, Laden,
(19:04):
there we got some your bully. No, let's do an
sm mar break right now. Okay, okay, let's go oh wait,
that's really bad. Okay. It's like this guy's ready, thank you,
(19:30):
thank you calling come to my service. Look like, why
were you guys saying thank you for the rosie? That's
what they do on tick too. Keep just process that
(19:54):
enough like a minute and a half ago. I keep
it a rom thank you, thank you anyway, it has
been your a SMR. That was really good. As I
(20:26):
was saying, gem and Lena, you are not only two
of my favorite ladies, but you have something very important
in common that actually we just marked the looks. Oh
my god, no unbeatable charm, no impeccable sense of humor.
But I knew to pause for a third one. All
characteristics to define the both of us. To be honest, No,
(20:48):
you're Leo Queen exactly the same thing, the same thing,
the same thing, different cool synonym. But I've had the
pleasure in Italics of being able to see the pride
that you both have for your birth sign and some
(21:09):
of the traits that come along with it. So how
do you feel about that? Can you give me some
insight into the Leo that wasn't like all of it
when we high five then acknowledged our own. Well, I
do feel like there's a difference between July Leo's and
there is a difference between July Leo's and August Leo's,
the most notable one that being that August Leo's are better.
(21:36):
Speaking of birthdays, Lena. Yeah, okay, fine, Leo's for sure.
We celebrate birthdays really hard, but you especially celebrate birthdays
really hard. I don't know what it is about you,
what it is about Lena. Every time we asked Lena
what she's up to, It's a birthday, the birthday which
you are, the birthday which we thought it was an
excuse at first, Yeah, we did. We thought she was
(21:57):
just like dodging hang out with us, and I was like,
you know him, we're probably just like uncool to her.
Still swear, do you ask her sad? You must have
a lot of friends. Yeah, I mean, I don't want
to be like I have a lot of friends, but
like I do, but like friends are but like and
they're all like, I don't know. I love my friends.
My friends are like my favorite people. But all my
(22:19):
friends are awesome. Like I'm very collective about who I'm
friends with because I feel like who you hang around
like you kind of become. So I'm very picky with
who I surround myself with. But all my friends are
like awesome people. I love that, so I love to
celebrate them and think birthdays are worth celebrating. Oh god, no,
we're going to have to change her name from the
birthday which like the birthday fairy. That's cute with the
(22:43):
birthday fairy, which was like, you kind of are the
birthday fairy. Oh man, Lima, are you dating someone now? Yes?
I know. Something actually super creepy happened last week. They
wrote an article that I felt super bad because I
never talked about my Instagram or anything, because you know,
like some things are better off like private, you know
(23:03):
what I mean, Like I don't want to put him
on blast. And they found his instagram, wrote an article
put his Instagram, put where he works. Oh my god,
they like put where he works, put things about his sister,
and I got so upset. I felt so bad. I
was like, I'm so sorry. I can tell you about that.
We didn't post a picture on purpose until we were
dating for a year, not because we didn't want to.
And I'm sure you know this, like our parents are
(23:25):
in the public eye and we've chosen to also pursue
that career, and now so has Jem. But when we
started dating, you know, she was in a different place
in her life. And that's such a delicate thing when
you're trying to integrate the person that you're dating into
a career as difficult as you know, as being in
the public eye. So I was wanted to share so much,
(23:49):
but we held back. And then obviously when I did share,
remember what happened. Everyone has their opinions. It's like not
only that they take it and they wrote like our goals,
Oh yeah yeah, But I think it's kind of funny.
It teaches me a lot. I've learned a lot of
humility coming from like the outside world that views celebrity
(24:14):
in one way and has had very limited experiences with celebrities,
which is like of the population as one thing, and
then like going from that to almost immediately like head
first into you guys family, which especially in the Latin community,
it's like, you know, all the Stephan family, and there's
(24:35):
a lot of esteem there obviously rightfully so because of accomplishments,
because not only is your mom and your dad in
the entertainment industry, your mom is in the entertainment industry.
So it's like this big thing, but it is humbling
because it was a big lesson to me, like not
just about celebrity, but like in life in general, things
are not what they see. Things are not what they
(24:56):
see period, end of story. No matter what you've leave,
no matter what you think, like, you don't know anyone's hardships,
you don't know anyone's successes. You you you just don't know.
But it's yeah, it's definitely humbling, and it's so weird.
It's so I remember the first time that I kind
of like was faced with like what am I doing?
(25:16):
You know, because there were moms where I was like, oh,
I can do this, like I can date somebody like Emily.
Um was at the opening of a stuff on kitchen
and it was the first time that I experienced like
the cameras And maybe it's small. I know, you guys
literally were raised in that environment. I mean there's videos
of them that you can find on the internet of
her like trying to shoot cameras away. I'm sure there
(25:39):
are some of yours too, Um. But being somebody who
didn't grow up in that environment, it's wild. Like I
thought I was going to pass out just from all
of the flashes and like it's uncomfortable, dude, to this day,
it's super I'm super unco I'm not. That is not
my comfort zone at all. I had to say. I
remember I had to sit down because I was just
(25:59):
like even it's like something so simple. It's experiencing these
like thirty forty five minutes of these cameras and these
interviews of these videos, like so overwhelming, so overwhelming. I
feel like, also we both kind of look like our
parents a little bit, and like we're following Like your
mom was a model, she also danced. My mom was
(26:19):
a musician, you know. And people make that connection, you know,
and there's a lot of weird things that come out
of those connections that they then like impose onto us.
You know, you're not good enough, you'll never be as good.
You know, you're ugly, you know, because whatever the case
may be. But I agree with you. I always sometimes
(26:41):
even with Gem and my mom, I tell them, you know,
like for all the people that say beautiful things, you know,
like the one negative comment will get to you or like,
you know, and you can't let that happen. You know,
every time you see that, you turn around and find
a positive one and say thank you, you know, sending
hugs whatever. For me To answer your question, I tried
(27:04):
to run as far away from this line of work,
on this career as possible. I don't know if that's true,
and there's videos of you performing on stage with your
mom and playing with music videos with her hold on.
Even in those moments, I never connected what I was
doing with my life path. I thought it was like
(27:28):
a bobby, a fun thing, like you know, playing a
sport or whatever. I never thought. And even then, when
you see those videos of me playing, you'll see her
band trying to push me to the top of the
stage and me being super shy and super insecure. Lena
knew me in that time, you know, And so for me,
I have to I had to fight and fight and
(27:49):
fight until it was finally just obvious. I had to
fight constantly against what I thought, what I didn't think
was going to be my life, only to realize that
when you have a passion and are also blessed enough
to have a passion, doesn't matter what your parents do,
doesn't matter what you want to do. You know, you're
(28:12):
ultimately just going to be in love with that for
the rest of your life, so you might as well
nurture a relationship with it. And a friend of mine
from Berkeley, Giuliano, like he would tell me all the time,
he's like, when I started making music, it was like
you know, modeling or whatever it is. If you happen
to have a passion, it's like falling in love. You know,
you can practice all the time and you never get
(28:32):
sick of it and whatever. But then time goes on
and somebody tells you you're ugly and somebody tells you
you suck, and it's three am and you're exhausted, and
you have to still nurture that relationship like you would
with a person, to continue to do what you love.
So it's a constant thing for me, Like some days
it's really hard and I'm like, what am I doing?
And some days I'm like, because you don't want to
(28:54):
do the public element of it? Yeah, because I also
feel like I have this fantasy in my head, for example,
Like for me, it's never been about the fame or
the fortune. It's always about the art and the feeling
it brings me to make music and to create. You
both said that, right, So like I will or connect
connect with people, like I love connecting with people. But
before you know, you watch videos of Woodstock and times
(29:17):
when there weren't cell phones and you could be a
musician without being an influencer. You said it yourself oh
now you have to post and you have to whatever
to be a part of this big own. It's not
an exaggeration. I mean recently a bunch of artists were
posting on TikTok how literally their labels were not allowing
them to release music if they didn't have a viral TikTok. Right, Yeah,
(29:39):
so you know, for me, it's always a fight in there,
like ever ever changing elements. But hey, it's like you
have to have a lot of self love. Yeah, that's
why I waited until I was older and too, because
I wanted to like develop all my self esteem before
putting myself out there. It's tough. It's a tough decision
to make it. Like you guys both said that, there's
(30:01):
a payoff at the end of it. It's also a
lot of pressure because our parents are just so awesome. Yeah,
and they're they and it's it's crazy because it's like
to the nth degree, like you know, of course, in
the outside world you have like people who have their
families who are like, oh, you know, we're all doctors.
My dad was a doctor, my grandfather was a doctor,
(30:21):
and here, you know, well we're all lawyers and here's
our firm and like, yeah, I know that people grow
up with that pressure to like measure up to their parents,
but you guys do it and the whole world watches.
So kudos to your bravery. Okay, Lena, So tell us,
like your birthday is coming up. You're turning twenty, right,
(30:44):
happy birthday? Also, happy almost birthday? Jam? Yeah? Are we
having a birthday celebration on the spaceship? I would love to?
Awesome funny, So what kind of stuff are you? I
know that you're still like finishing school and stuff, but
I know that you're in the modeling world. I've seen
you do stuff already. You know, like what kind of
(31:07):
stuff are you doing? Now? What what do you see
yourself doing? Like if you could decide, are you just
open to everything? I'm open to everything. I think that
part of life is just trying everything. You look back
and you only regret the things that you didn't try.
So I don't know about you, because for me, I
don't know. Maybe it's my grandma, maybe it's my mom,
(31:30):
I don't know what. But like I've always been afraid to, like,
you know, defy my parents in any way or like
keep something from them. And one of those things that
they've always instilled in me, Like your mom that tells
you if you get a tattoo, I'm gonna rip your
hair out. You know. Yeah, my mom is like she
(31:50):
hates skydiving. And is it true that you and your
brother this I did to go skydiving and not tell
your mother? Yes? Can you explain that to me? So
I was turning nineteen, and I've always I've always been
the braver sibling when it comes to that stuff. Remember
(32:11):
we would go to Universal and Lordon would be scared
to go on the ride, so I'd be like, I'll
go with you. Remember Rip Ride Rocket. I went first
all those rides. So I always told my brother, please,
I really want to go sky diving. As soon as
I turned eighteen, I really want to try it. So
we were in Dubai a few years ago and I
wasn't of age yet, so I was like please, just
(32:33):
like I think there it's sixteen. I was an of
age yet here, but I think over there at sixteen,
So I was like, lording, please, now is my time?
How many times can you say that you went skydiving
in Dubai? Like, let's go? What are you? What is
your mental block? With this. Obviously, my mom wasn't going
to come with me, so I was like, Lord and
come on. He said no. So I was like, okay,
when I turned eighteen, we're going in Miami. Wait. So
(32:55):
Lording had already gone no, but I'm never gone. Gordon
hates all that. I want to go in Dubai and
he said no because I was of age over there
but not over here. So when we were over there,
I was like please please, he was like no. I
was like all right, and my mom wasn't gonna go
with me, so I was like, I guess I'm screwed.
I'm not gonna go by myself. That's like really weird.
So so then whatever last year, I was turning nineteen
(33:18):
because eighteen it was during quarantine. I couldn't really do much.
So I turned nineteen. I was like, I didn't tell him.
I just called booked for six people, like a plane
for six people. And I was like, I'm doing this.
I don't care who comes with me, I don't know whatever.
So I just called on and I'm like, hey, we
have skydiving book this day. At this time, it was
the morning after my birthday celebration. What a huge dinner
(33:42):
like crazy at Marianna was like a huge party, was
so fun. I always go super hard for my birthday.
Is obviously life is worth celebrating. Yeah, so then um
whatever we went the next morning we had gone to space,
then one skydiving um, and then we drove to Homestead
and me my best friend Sabrina went Tomizo sub Girl,
(34:03):
her brother came and one of Lodon's friends and Lordon
went and Lordon hated it. He hated it. He looked
like he liked it not he like he had like
a huge not a panic. When he landed, he was
just like in cold sweats, like couldn't breathe because it's
it's intense. You know when you're on those spinny things
in the playground and you get off super dizzy. They
(34:24):
do that with the parachoot. They go like that and
you start spinning, so you get down super dizzy. I
felt like I was hung over the rest of the
day when like I had a drink or anything, like,
I was just like yeah. So then I knew my
mom would say no, So I just like booked paid
for and then I was like I'll tell her after
I'll show her the video. So then god, I would never.
(34:46):
And I was the first one out of the plane.
I was first, and then all the skydiving videos like
they take a go pro video individually, and I'm talking
to my mom the whole time. I'm like hey, Mom,
like i'll see you soon hopefully, you know, like whatever.
So then we jump out of the plane and I
went first, and you see in the video aload and
go like ah. He freaked out. He was like dying.
He wanted to kill me. He was like, I'm never
(35:08):
doing that ever again. I hate you for booking this
without telling me. I was like, you could have said no,
I didn't put a gun to your head. An So
then whatever. We get home and my mom sees our
hair like all over the place. It looked like we
had been in a fight. We all looked so rough
because we walked and we all wanted to throw up.
We were just so nauseous. And then we had to
drive all the way back from Homestead. We got there
(35:29):
like at eight in the morning, and we got home
at six because we were the last plane to go.
It's like first come, first serve. Even if you booked
it out a certain time, you have to wait for
So we were the last plane of the day. We
went out like five. So then we walked in and
my mom was like, did you guys go skydiving? Because
she sees the certificate with like the little parachute on it,
(35:50):
and we're like, sit down, and we showed her the video.
She started dying of laughter. My mom gets My mom
doesn't get mad at me for the things she should
get mad at me for, and then she'll like ground
me for leaving the house slides Lena, do you remember
(36:18):
meeting gem for the first time? Um? Wasn't it at
the funeral? Oh? Yis might have been. Didn't you go
to New Year's Eve with your mom and your brother? Where? Oh? Then, yeah,
I was in New York. But I didn't know you
guys were dating even at the funeral. You want to
(36:39):
know how I found out you guys were dating Because
you guys kissed in front of me, And that's how
I found out you were lesbian. I thought this whole time, like, remember, yes,
I remember we were at the day after the funeral
was Father's Day, So you guys are at the funeral
together everything, and then the next day we're at your
parents house for Father's Day and it's us three in
the pool and we're just like playing around, like jumping
(37:00):
in the pool whatever, and then you guys just kissed.
I was like, oh oh. I was like, oh, they're dating.
I'm a lesbian. What do you think? Would you think
I was just like some random girl that sort of
showing up to the family stuff. I don't know, like
a friend would first goddle comes to all my family things.
(37:24):
My friends, No, all my best friends always come to
my family things. So then I don't know. I was
just like, oh, I think it's a good way to
do it. Just ripped the band aid right off. Yeah.
I literally had no idea that you were even like
the slightest bit Gay's younger than I remember somebody asking
you once in front of me. They were like, oh,
when did you like know m was like gay and
you were like always. I was like, actually I didn't
(37:46):
until she kissed jump in front of me. We were
in the pool, and I was like oh. And then
I called Loden. I remember he was at a basketball tournament.
I was like, did you know? He was like no,
but sick. I was like, all right, by good luck
on your tournament. That's it. That's awesome. No, I love that.
I mean like Natalia, our cousin Natalia, you know she's young,
(38:08):
really young. Yeah, and you know she was like, oh
are you guys sisters? Are you guys do? And I mean,
but you know what, like what she was like, where's
your mob? Like not here? Listen. I remember being a
kid and being like genuinely curious, but it never came
with judgment the same way that before we were talking
about like kids being honest and like just just asking questions,
(38:29):
asking questions. It don't care, they don't care, like and
also there's no reason unless their parents tell them to
also or unless you make them feel like there's something
wrong with it, like if somebody asked you or worry.
Oh nothing, we're you know, we're gay, but don't say anything.
But no, you say, oh, we're together, just like mom
and dad are. Lada was like no, they're girlfriends. You know,
(38:50):
she's like looking at us, she was like, okay, can
we play now? She's like she's like, all right, sick
can we go to But anyway, yeah, I know it's cool.
You know. Sometimes I don't know. So in families sometimes
people are always like, oh, you know, why don't we
talk about it? And whatever. I have that argument with
(39:11):
people all the time. I'm like, because I didn't really know, yeah,
who I really was yet I was figuring it out.
You know, it's whether you're gay or straight. You know,
like your private life, so as long as it's not harmful,
you can stay private. Yeah. Yeah, And I think sometimes
even though even if you know deep down something about yourself,
(39:32):
it's really different to like know it even act on it,
and then like it's so different to vocalize it. Yeah,
it's also up to you whenever you feel ready. So
many people and especially family members, think that they're entitled
to know your business right now that they're like, why
didn't you tell me? I'm like, because I didn't want to. Yeah.
And if there's anything that really your family doesn't really
(39:54):
need to know about, it's like your romantic life, which
is about you know, you and that person but totally
or you know, your stool, your no I send pics
to loudon. Yeah, and you know what, I'm going to
also blame your mom for that, who literally had a book,
Oh my God, of your brother's poop. She still has
our first poops in a box, my mom. You know,
(40:16):
my mom gets attached to like items. But she has
our umbilical cords. She has all our teeth, but we
lost all our teeth. I feel like this is you know,
like I'd be very scared. She has diaries after dark.
Oh god, she has diarrheas. No, she has diaries of
It's like August seven two to Lena discovered her hands,
(40:39):
August whatever, Lena discovered her feet. Lena's first, and she
would like write about it. And it's like a little
book and she has it for both of us, and
a little book with our poop. That's so cute. She's
like teeth and umbilical cord. Lena has eaten her bookers
for the first No, I promised you that's there. I
(41:02):
promise you it's there. Yeah, I want to ask her
to show you, guys. She still has my crib. If
you go to the garage at the lake House, my
crib is in there. Now. You go to the house
one day and she's sleeping in it, reading the journal.
She doesn't get rid of it. I'm like, mom, she
had it in our actual house once, just in the hallway.
I'm like, mom, it makes me really uncomfortable to just
walk by and see my crib. There. Can you please
like donated it. She's like, yeah, I'll donate it. Three
(41:24):
months later, I opened the garage at the lake house.
It's sitting there and I'm telling you. She's like, it's
for your kids. That's cute. Yeah, like rusty vomit right there?
Can we get a new crib? This is my second poop,
really resting my stomach. She still keeps my poops like
that and a container like that, every single poop I
(41:47):
were taken. Oh that's what that was the other day
in the house. I knew there was interesting. We're joking
on the headline, like the has has the poops officially
cassified so that it's like a solid out Probably dude,
that poops twenty some years old years old, that's a
twenty year old poop. This is a joke. Disclaimer, I
(42:08):
don't want people to think that she's Okay, yeah that does.
My mom looked through my poop for my first tooth.
That fine, like but also fine, see yous. Weird about
this is that it's also something that's passed down through generations.
(42:29):
I've learned because Emily, when we first started dating, I
opened up a drawer in the kitchen like right on top,
right on top of where the wine was, which is
like weird placement. And it was a freaking zip lock
bag of a Lula's teeth. I'm like, why you why
you have a Lula's teeth? What are you gonna do
with a cute they are? But what are you doing
(42:52):
with it? Staring at them? You know, like, why are
you keeping it? It's cool? I just made an earring. No,
I'm kidding, honestly, that would be at least a little cool. No,
no dog earing dog teeth earring? Yeah, it could be cute.
What else you could be? Creepy? Could be really creepy,
creepy cute. Li'ma being luassas, thank you. Like my family,
(43:20):
I have loved being your cuisine, your prima numero. I'ma
and don't flare your nostrils at me. I love you,
Oh listen, I love you. I've loved growing up with you,
you know, like every family, you know, there have been
(43:41):
moments where we don't talk so much. But I'm glad
to say hopefully that we spend a lot more time
together as we have been because I love it and
the three of us have a great dynamic, and I'm sure,
the more we get to know Sean, the more he's
gonna hate me, because the more all love him and
annoy him. You're the world's funniest human. That funny. He
says that you're so funny that it's almost intimidating. Wow,
(44:03):
you heard that, and she will just put that on
a loop. But anyway, so thank you, thank you for
being with us today. We have deemed you the comic
cousin because yes, just as we have heard, you have
spontaneously joined our flights. You've grabbed onto our wing and
our jet engines and always put a smile or a
(44:23):
look of confusion on our face. So thank you for
being the comic cousin. And gem I believe that we
have something for Lena. Don't we heard that, Lording, I'm
the comic cousin, Lording. We love you. We'll think of
another one for Lording. So Lima, we have something for you, ye,
(44:44):
ra Moral please lean It passed me. Uh yeah, one
of those Nope, one of the records. Yeah what did
you choose? Linda? Run start, Linda run said, And all right,
on this day, Lena Luisses, you are being awarded as
(45:10):
the comic cousin in our own world pod. Open up
your scroll. We are passing her more realistic. Described that
because you know everybody that's listening is audio only. So
described rocks pop rocks from the Journey. They're actually moving rocks.
We got them from planets. We collected them. Are so
(45:32):
blue rospberry best flavor only way. And now I'm opening
the scroll, but it's taped, nube. It's not tape. It's
charge our glue from planets. Well, we love that planet food.
(45:52):
Certificate of Achievement. This certificate is awarded to the comic cousin.
I am a being Louisses a one prank accomplished, perfect
delivery of that I fuck her right in the pussy,
and an international fork connership from Jeminy Hernandez and Emily
Stefan captain and shorter castin. All right, congratulations, Lena, I
(46:18):
nite the the cod cousin. Yeah, I'm taking my diploma
out of the little FOLDI thing and put it have
some fire holes in it because it actually had to
go through a meteor field to get to us. We
don't have printers in space. All right, Well, Lena, that
was officially your fourth appearance on the show. That's so exciting.
(46:40):
Fourth and last, whenever have you got thank you for being.
I hope that you'll continue to be our silent sidekick
and grace us with interesting knowledge that we have no
need for, but that makes our lives more entertaining. Yes,
I love you, guys, We love you. Are welcome. Got you.
(47:05):
I'll I'll be your mango mamah. Yeah. And if you're
out there listening, pick up the phone and call your cousin.
And if you don't have a cousin, call somebody that
you grew up with that makes you happy and have
a laugh and make your day better by guys, See
you next Moodcast. Bye bye, Thanks for the races. This
(47:32):
is a Moonflower production in partnership with I Hearts Mike
will do that podcast network. For more podcasts, visit the
I Heart Radio app or wherever you listen to your
favorite shows.
I have you the same. Let's go to a man
one already ready for rendering it a theme launching. Well, well,
(00:31):
well the time has come. Look what the cat tracked in.
Some of you may have realized, or may not have realized,
that there has been a person lurking in the shadows
of our show since its inception. Lena has been a
part of not one, not two, but three of our
(00:51):
podcast spontaneously, spontaneously, completely unplanned. Let's run it back, accessing files.
She's there though, she's there though, right? What's up? Each Lena? Okay,
your mom, your your mom can't hear us, right, she's
sitting next to me. We're gonna prank call her. Hi.
(01:20):
I'm going to say my guilty pleasure? What is your
guilty pleasure? My parts smell good sometimes? Wow? Free entry complete?
Did you guess? Lena Luis's what the comment of our show?
(01:41):
The comment cousin herself Rima la prima, Lena lima Bean
Luaz's I'm so excited it's my first podcast. Welcome podcast, Verge,
thanks for taking my podcast, Virginity. We're gonna pod I
was gonna say pod cast your cherry, but that's there's
(02:04):
like something like our family is listening to this. Oh yeah,
as if your mom isn't out there talking about sex.
There's nothing wrong with that, by the way, nothing right.
But you know, I don't think they'll think much of
what we have to say here today. So Lena's really
special because other than being Lena, other than being Leo,
very very very very special things about her, she is
(02:26):
not You guys don't, at least from my observation of
being around for the last almost six years that I know.
D I know, trust me, but you guys are not
like your typical cousins. M's lack of siblings in her
age group made it so that you guys kind of
grew up, you know, like closer. I would. I would
(02:47):
say that you and Lordon are like MS sibling. Yeah,
I completely agree. She's like the third short. When Jem
was like, I don't know, you have not in common,
I'm like, well, I'm two ft and lead us nine.
We look really funny next to each other, which is
incredible because I don't know where that tall moment came from.
(03:10):
But over here we need some of those. If you
just trunk Kate, like the bottom third of your legs,
I would be normal height and you'd still be tall. No, yeah,
I know. It's the craziest thing. When I was walking in,
I was on the bottom stair and you guys were
on the top stair, and you guys were finally looking
at me. I literally said, Lena, I don't think this
will ever happen again. You guys, give me a hugget
(03:31):
straight into my boobs. I was about to say, your
eyes are just your boobs for me. Oh, I forgot
there's an upstairs. But yeah, no, you should post a
picture of just like all of us. She was off
the same height, so that people really understand pure of
me and your mom. Oh that's something else. I thought
it was photoshopped. It's a whole foot different. And then
(03:53):
when she showed it to me on her phone, I'm like, oh,
especially know how to know a photoshop. It's definitely real.
But yeah, jim I, Lording and Lena are definitely more
like siblings to me. I mean I remember being there
the day you both were born, and you even more
so old. No, I mean, no, you're older, but it's
(04:14):
not even that we're all still young. Stop trying to
kill us. But the point is that you're older. No,
the day that you guys were born, I was there
and I even remember carrying lording. There's pictures. But when
you were born, I was older, and I'm obsessed. I
bring it up all the time because I remember when
we would take you to Vero Beach and we had
(04:34):
this little plastic bathtub. Probably no, not that, not that.
Wait a minute, I would you see Lena thinks of
shadier than I am. I would never do you that
dirty on the podcast, all right, some lines you don't cross,
and I'll leave that to your imagination. And yes it
(04:55):
involved a potato. No, just get away. No, this was
a sweet thing, you demons. Oh gosh, it's the only
thing I have that in Cuban coffee. And we would
you were like my little doll. I would bathe you.
I will say that you did look like the michelin man.
(05:18):
Oh my god, you were a huge but really cute.
I would wear one year old clothes when I was
like three months. Really, poor mother. I wear that clothes now, No,
her poor mother. That was okay, So that was the
beginning of my relationship with Lena. We're driving to the
house on the beach. We rem with my dad and
(05:40):
your mom was about to pop right, but we didn't
think it would be anytime soon. You know, there was
still time, we thought. And we're literally turning into the
island and your mom calls. She's like, hey, um, Lena's coming,
like going to the hospital and we're like, oh my god,
like we're going to turn around and go, and she's
(06:01):
like it's probably gonna be a long time, like, ain't
no thing whatever, I kid you not. By the time
we got to the hospital, they were like, she's like
everybody said it was the fastest birth that they walked
into the room to like say good luck to my mom.
They walked out and they were like, okay, come back in.
Her screams in twenty seconds. And the joke was that
(06:22):
there needed to be a red carpet under her because
your mom was watching TV and she literally left the
TV on popped you out. I don't know if you
were like covered in a sack of butter or whoof,
but she doesn't like poo right out of her. And
then we were like, oh, okay, so you entered this
world flying fast girl, and they made bets on my
hair color. Did you know about that? Of course, you
(06:43):
know how Lodan has jet black hair, so does my dad,
and my mom's the only blonde one. I came out
with jet black hair and myda was like, she's going
to be blonde. Yeah, she was like, she's going to
be blond. And everyone was like, you're crazy, look at
her hair, Look at lodan, she's gonna have black hair.
And she was like, no, I had a dream that
she came out and she had long blonde hair like
(07:05):
my hair right now. She was like, I had a
dream that she was a child, but she had super
long blonde hair. And for the first four years of
my life I had black hair. And my mom said
one day she was brushing my hair and she just
saw a blonde curl and it started coming out blonder
and blonder. My hair started growing out blonde, and I
was like, I told you guys, they would keep that.
And she photoshopped a picture of me with blonde hair.
(07:26):
She said that she's going to try to find it.
I want to find it. But anyway, Lena would be
michelin Man. Lena two years old, would did she you
had this attitude? Girls? My god, you wouldn't say good morning.
You just wanted nothing to do with anybody, and you
would come and say at the breakfast table, will be like,
good morning, Lena, Hello, and then this was your response. No,
(07:50):
get at the scene and you go the williest man.
You smell back. I mean, but I really got to us,
like would be like ha ha. Then do you think
that the person actually smelled bad or leta was just leading?
That's what I was about to say. Like people would
laugh and then walk away, like smelling their pits, Like
(08:10):
is this two year old onto something? I feel like
insults hurt more from little kids because they're true. That's
why I'm asking. I have no awareness. They just say
what's on their mind. But I would say it to everyone.
I think maybe one person smelled bad and then I
saw how hurt they got from it, and I was like,
I can use this on anyone. But I was two
years old, so I don't know what I was thinking, like,
(08:32):
but I like a lead plotting. I was a double child.
I would set off the alarm at night from screaming
so loud because we had a lock on the outside
of my door. My mom said they would have to
turn off the alarm at night because I would throw
and just scream and the alarm would go off. The
police would call the house because the alarm would go
off so many times that they thought someone was breaking in.
(08:53):
To this day, my room still has a lock on
the outside of the door because I would climb out
of my crib and like leave my room in the
middle of the night and just walk around in my
diaper Like I mean, you were like four ft tall
at age two. No, I would climb out of my crib.
I would just jump out, So they put a lock
on the outside of my door, and then when I
would not be able to get out, I'd just start screaming.
The alarm would go off and they'd come open the door,
(09:14):
and yeah, cops called on you. Since two years old.
You know what's really really sad that I think about
a lot, And this is just me being me right now,
that there's a point in your life that your parents
like pick you up for the last time, and do
(09:36):
they know that that's the last time that they'll pick
you up. I jumped on my mom yesterday, so you're
like absolutely, yeah, no, but not when she's standing. She'll
just be sitting at the dinner table and I'll just
like sit on her and I'm like three times in
her size I'm just like sitting on her lap, and
she's like, what are you doing? Like, I don't want
to want to be the last time that you picked
(09:56):
me up, because I read that somewhere too. It's so
sad everybody picks me up because I'm pick up a bull. Yes,
I can probably fit in the average person's pocket. You're
an easy pickup. I don't know. I feel like people
see my small frame and are just like I'd like
to hoist her, just if to try. You know, I
(10:18):
can't relate. Actually, I'd love to try to pick you up.
I don't think you could. Let's do it right now,
do it? Oh my god, we're taking her headphones off.
Challenge accepted. Oh my god. Lina is officially out of
(10:38):
frame for those of you wondering. Yep, okay, and up.
And she picked her up, but Lena kind of had
to help because if not, her legs would still reach
the floor because she's just that tall headphone. All right,
settle down, ladies. Jem you you've known Lena it. What's
(11:00):
your favorite Lena memory? To be honest with you, I
don't think that I can top what happened last week.
I don't think anything will top that for a while.
Oh god, can I say it? Whatever? Oh my god? Okay,
So so we just went to we went to go
look at a property that Lena's mom just got. Lena
(11:21):
called me and was like come over, and we're like, okay,
sure whatever. This property has multiple bedrooms, multiple bathrooms. It
was recently acquired, so you know, I'm sure that it
is not to the highest clean stick cleaning standards, but
it's clean as most new purchases are. Lena probably like
(11:42):
five minutes into us arriving there, bulson Aside is like, guys,
I really really have to pee. Me and I'm kind
of looking at each other, look at Lina. We're like,
good thing that we're at a house with a bunch
of bathrooms, and the just like, no, the thing is
is that I can't pee in the bathroom because there's
a roach there. It's a dead roach, was a rod.
(12:04):
If there's one, there's more. Okay, they travel in pairs,
you're not wrong. You're not wrong. When there's one, there's more.
But there was only one roach and it was already dead,
and you were talking about one of several bathrooms. So
instead of like I don't know, getting rid of the
roach or say, going to another bathroom. Lena doesn't even
(12:28):
grab toilet paper, doesn't even grab paper, towels, doesn't anything.
Literally goes to the side of the house, pulls out
aroundnywhere and starts peeing. It was easy because I was
wearing a dress. I was just like, but you wouldn't.
You didn't even make you don't even aid. You didn't
even make it to the grass. You were just like
straight up peeing on the asphalt. So they all start
(12:49):
trying to walk to the side of the house and
no over here. They're like, why we want to see
the house. They're like stop and you're just here like
the putta of peebecomes a river like down the floor. Clearly, wow,
yeah that was And by the way, the bathrooms were fine.
And also, Jim, you shady girl, you hate roaches. I
(13:13):
don't think that you'd be in the bathroom with a
roach in it, But I certainly wouldn't pee in the
concrete beside my house. I will continue to pee on
the side of But why did you go to the
other bathrooms? Because if there's one, there's more, So you
were afraid of encountering more roaches and other bathrooms I
wasn't afraid clean attract what you fear, but I definitely
(13:37):
did not want to counter another one her cock You
attract what you fear, So then I just took an
alternate route, a nature scenic route. Hey, can I fertilize
the plants? Would you rather quick? Would you rather wake
up with a giant cockroach crawling up your naked body
(13:59):
in almost near your mouth? Because if you feel legs,
you're sleeping naked and the giant cock role just climbing
up your body, and right when you wake up, it's
a little front gritter legs are going into your mouth
and going around your bottom teeth. Would you rather that?
(14:19):
You give the worst? Would questions? Or you never have
to encounter a cock roach in nature ever again? But
that's all you can eat for the rest of your life.
What's wrong with you? Neither? Thanks for us? She gives
the worst? Would you rather? I still have this one
(14:40):
ingrained in my mind. I was like nine years old
when you told me this, and I still to this day.
I asked my friends, because it's so horrible, tell me
if you remember, would you rather slide down a pool
of razor blades? A slide of razor blades into a
pool of rubbing alcohol, so like you have scratches all
over your body and then yeah cuts, and then you
go into a pool of rubbing alcohol hydrogen peroxide and
(15:03):
you have to stay in there or put toothpicks under
each of your nails and kick a wall us it. Wow.
So first of all recycled, and second of all, you
are single handedly responsible for most of leader's trauma if
you're a little young for them. Maybe you think I
was falling asleep just visualizing, and I was like, oh god,
(15:26):
I'm sorry. I still look, I'll pay for like three
therapy lessons. You also three I'll pay lessons. I'll pay
for three therapy lessons. Yeah, you know you should have
You know you should have paid for that. You probably
traumatized her another way by leading her to believe that
(15:48):
she could be a singer. Is you should have paid
for singing lessons after that recording. Wow, she's gone there
have it on you please. I actually thought I was
going to get signed. Guys. I was like, oh my god,
I'm so good because Emily let you believe that there
is such thing as too nice. I was in the
(16:11):
studio and she was just outside dying of Okay. First
of all, the studio was the bathroom in my playroom.
Yeah that is. I just remember opening the bathroom door
and there's just like a huge mic stand and I'm like, yes,
my moment, listen, this is. This is like some of
my first intro to engineering and recording because I would
(16:32):
have my laptop and I was your labra. No, you
were my muse. Wow. Okay. So I had these like
karaoke tracks and I would put Lena and run this
like crazy thirt tiny eighth inch cable so she could
listen right and put her in the bathroom or the
closet or whatever, and she would do this the next
(16:58):
Rihanna mean wait for this note. The last the last
(17:30):
one is my favorite. Listen to the no listen, Listen
to the outro, listen, listen to this my last note,
the last one. Listen, and the mix is called We
(17:54):
Found Lena. We Found the EQ is not too bad.
Oh my god, Emily, Oh my god. Leta. First of all,
we were You're so cute, but I was older. That's
that's the part that isn't cute. I was like a
teenager already. You sounded so little. I was like probably no, no, no,
(18:16):
no no, because I was like eleven Lima. I was
like eleven Lima being Luaza's you were a little how little?
Because I was singing it, re sent me that right now,
resent me right now. I'm going to remix that ship
and we're going to bring it back. Wow. I like
played in the car with my friends. We're just driving
somewhere and I play it and they're like, who is this?
(18:37):
I'm like, guess that's beautiful. You'd always be down though,
I'd love that, like you'd always be down for my ship.
I had the best time with you, I know. Remember that.
Lena and hate because Lord was being mean to me,
so we would write a song and would write a
song to make me feel better. Lida am hate lot.
It was being a bungo. That's right, Lena. Okay, Laden,
(19:04):
there we got some your bully. No, let's do an
sm mar break right now. Okay, okay, let's go oh wait,
that's really bad. Okay. It's like this guy's ready, thank you,
(19:30):
thank you calling come to my service. Look like, why
were you guys saying thank you for the rosie? That's
what they do on tick too. Keep just process that
(19:54):
enough like a minute and a half ago. I keep
it a rom thank you, thank you anyway, it has
been your a SMR. That was really good. As I
(20:26):
was saying, gem and Lena, you are not only two
of my favorite ladies, but you have something very important
in common that actually we just marked the looks. Oh
my god, no unbeatable charm, no impeccable sense of humor.
But I knew to pause for a third one. All
characteristics to define the both of us. To be honest, No,
(20:48):
you're Leo Queen exactly the same thing, the same thing,
the same thing, different cool synonym. But I've had the
pleasure in Italics of being able to see the pride
that you both have for your birth sign and some
(21:09):
of the traits that come along with it. So how
do you feel about that? Can you give me some
insight into the Leo that wasn't like all of it
when we high five then acknowledged our own. Well, I
do feel like there's a difference between July Leo's and
there is a difference between July Leo's and August Leo's,
the most notable one that being that August Leo's are better.
(21:36):
Speaking of birthdays, Lena. Yeah, okay, fine, Leo's for sure.
We celebrate birthdays really hard, but you especially celebrate birthdays
really hard. I don't know what it is about you,
what it is about Lena. Every time we asked Lena
what she's up to, It's a birthday, the birthday which
you are, the birthday which we thought it was an
excuse at first, Yeah, we did. We thought she was
(21:57):
just like dodging hang out with us, and I was like,
you know him, we're probably just like uncool to her.
Still swear, do you ask her sad? You must have
a lot of friends. Yeah, I mean, I don't want
to be like I have a lot of friends, but
like I do, but like friends are but like and
they're all like, I don't know. I love my friends.
My friends are like my favorite people. But all my
(22:19):
friends are awesome. Like I'm very collective about who I'm
friends with because I feel like who you hang around
like you kind of become. So I'm very picky with
who I surround myself with. But all my friends are
like awesome people. I love that, so I love to
celebrate them and think birthdays are worth celebrating. Oh god, no,
we're going to have to change her name from the
birthday which like the birthday fairy. That's cute with the
(22:43):
birthday fairy, which was like, you kind of are the
birthday fairy. Oh man, Lima, are you dating someone now? Yes?
I know. Something actually super creepy happened last week. They
wrote an article that I felt super bad because I
never talked about my Instagram or anything, because you know,
like some things are better off like private, you know
(23:03):
what I mean, Like I don't want to put him
on blast. And they found his instagram, wrote an article
put his Instagram, put where he works. Oh my god,
they like put where he works, put things about his sister,
and I got so upset. I felt so bad. I
was like, I'm so sorry. I can tell you about that.
We didn't post a picture on purpose until we were
dating for a year, not because we didn't want to.
And I'm sure you know this, like our parents are
(23:25):
in the public eye and we've chosen to also pursue
that career, and now so has Jem. But when we
started dating, you know, she was in a different place
in her life. And that's such a delicate thing when
you're trying to integrate the person that you're dating into
a career as difficult as you know, as being in
the public eye. So I was wanted to share so much,
(23:49):
but we held back. And then obviously when I did share,
remember what happened. Everyone has their opinions. It's like not
only that they take it and they wrote like our goals,
Oh yeah yeah, But I think it's kind of funny.
It teaches me a lot. I've learned a lot of
humility coming from like the outside world that views celebrity
(24:14):
in one way and has had very limited experiences with celebrities,
which is like of the population as one thing, and
then like going from that to almost immediately like head
first into you guys family, which especially in the Latin community,
it's like, you know, all the Stephan family, and there's
(24:35):
a lot of esteem there obviously rightfully so because of accomplishments,
because not only is your mom and your dad in
the entertainment industry, your mom is in the entertainment industry.
So it's like this big thing, but it is humbling
because it was a big lesson to me, like not
just about celebrity, but like in life in general, things
are not what they see. Things are not what they
(24:56):
see period, end of story. No matter what you've leave,
no matter what you think, like, you don't know anyone's hardships,
you don't know anyone's successes. You you you just don't know.
But it's yeah, it's definitely humbling, and it's so weird.
It's so I remember the first time that I kind
of like was faced with like what am I doing?
(25:16):
You know, because there were moms where I was like, oh,
I can do this, like I can date somebody like Emily.
Um was at the opening of a stuff on kitchen
and it was the first time that I experienced like
the cameras And maybe it's small. I know, you guys
literally were raised in that environment. I mean there's videos
of them that you can find on the internet of
her like trying to shoot cameras away. I'm sure there
(25:39):
are some of yours too, Um. But being somebody who
didn't grow up in that environment, it's wild. Like I
thought I was going to pass out just from all
of the flashes and like it's uncomfortable, dude, to this day,
it's super I'm super unco I'm not. That is not
my comfort zone at all. I had to say. I
remember I had to sit down because I was just
(25:59):
like even it's like something so simple. It's experiencing these
like thirty forty five minutes of these cameras and these
interviews of these videos, like so overwhelming, so overwhelming. I
feel like, also we both kind of look like our
parents a little bit, and like we're following Like your
mom was a model, she also danced. My mom was
(26:19):
a musician, you know. And people make that connection, you know,
and there's a lot of weird things that come out
of those connections that they then like impose onto us.
You know, you're not good enough, you'll never be as good.
You know, you're ugly, you know, because whatever the case
may be. But I agree with you. I always sometimes
(26:41):
even with Gem and my mom, I tell them, you know,
like for all the people that say beautiful things, you know,
like the one negative comment will get to you or like,
you know, and you can't let that happen. You know,
every time you see that, you turn around and find
a positive one and say thank you, you know, sending
hugs whatever. For me To answer your question, I tried
(27:04):
to run as far away from this line of work,
on this career as possible. I don't know if that's true,
and there's videos of you performing on stage with your
mom and playing with music videos with her hold on.
Even in those moments, I never connected what I was
doing with my life path. I thought it was like
(27:28):
a bobby, a fun thing, like you know, playing a
sport or whatever. I never thought. And even then, when
you see those videos of me playing, you'll see her
band trying to push me to the top of the
stage and me being super shy and super insecure. Lena
knew me in that time, you know, And so for me,
I have to I had to fight and fight and
(27:49):
fight until it was finally just obvious. I had to
fight constantly against what I thought, what I didn't think
was going to be my life, only to realize that
when you have a passion and are also blessed enough
to have a passion, doesn't matter what your parents do,
doesn't matter what you want to do. You know, you're
(28:12):
ultimately just going to be in love with that for
the rest of your life, so you might as well
nurture a relationship with it. And a friend of mine
from Berkeley, Giuliano, like he would tell me all the time,
he's like, when I started making music, it was like
you know, modeling or whatever it is. If you happen
to have a passion, it's like falling in love. You know,
you can practice all the time and you never get
(28:32):
sick of it and whatever. But then time goes on
and somebody tells you you're ugly and somebody tells you
you suck, and it's three am and you're exhausted, and
you have to still nurture that relationship like you would
with a person, to continue to do what you love.
So it's a constant thing for me, Like some days
it's really hard and I'm like, what am I doing?
And some days I'm like, because you don't want to
(28:54):
do the public element of it? Yeah, because I also
feel like I have this fantasy in my head, for example,
Like for me, it's never been about the fame or
the fortune. It's always about the art and the feeling
it brings me to make music and to create. You
both said that, right, So like I will or connect
connect with people, like I love connecting with people. But
before you know, you watch videos of Woodstock and times
(29:17):
when there weren't cell phones and you could be a
musician without being an influencer. You said it yourself oh
now you have to post and you have to whatever
to be a part of this big own. It's not
an exaggeration. I mean recently a bunch of artists were
posting on TikTok how literally their labels were not allowing
them to release music if they didn't have a viral TikTok. Right, Yeah,
(29:39):
so you know, for me, it's always a fight in there,
like ever ever changing elements. But hey, it's like you
have to have a lot of self love. Yeah, that's
why I waited until I was older and too, because
I wanted to like develop all my self esteem before
putting myself out there. It's tough. It's a tough decision
to make it. Like you guys both said that, there's
(30:01):
a payoff at the end of it. It's also a
lot of pressure because our parents are just so awesome. Yeah,
and they're they and it's it's crazy because it's like
to the nth degree, like you know, of course, in
the outside world you have like people who have their
families who are like, oh, you know, we're all doctors.
My dad was a doctor, my grandfather was a doctor,
(30:21):
and here, you know, well we're all lawyers and here's
our firm and like, yeah, I know that people grow
up with that pressure to like measure up to their parents,
but you guys do it and the whole world watches.
So kudos to your bravery. Okay, Lena, So tell us,
like your birthday is coming up. You're turning twenty, right,
(30:44):
happy birthday? Also, happy almost birthday? Jam? Yeah? Are we
having a birthday celebration on the spaceship? I would love to?
Awesome funny, So what kind of stuff are you? I
know that you're still like finishing school and stuff, but
I know that you're in the modeling world. I've seen
you do stuff already. You know, like what kind of
(31:07):
stuff are you doing? Now? What what do you see
yourself doing? Like if you could decide, are you just
open to everything? I'm open to everything. I think that
part of life is just trying everything. You look back
and you only regret the things that you didn't try.
So I don't know about you, because for me, I
don't know. Maybe it's my grandma, maybe it's my mom,
(31:30):
I don't know what. But like I've always been afraid to, like,
you know, defy my parents in any way or like
keep something from them. And one of those things that
they've always instilled in me, Like your mom that tells
you if you get a tattoo, I'm gonna rip your
hair out. You know. Yeah, my mom is like she
(31:50):
hates skydiving. And is it true that you and your
brother this I did to go skydiving and not tell
your mother? Yes? Can you explain that to me? So
I was turning nineteen, and I've always I've always been
the braver sibling when it comes to that stuff. Remember
(32:11):
we would go to Universal and Lordon would be scared
to go on the ride, so I'd be like, I'll
go with you. Remember Rip Ride Rocket. I went first
all those rides. So I always told my brother, please,
I really want to go sky diving. As soon as
I turned eighteen, I really want to try it. So
we were in Dubai a few years ago and I
wasn't of age yet, so I was like please, just
(32:33):
like I think there it's sixteen. I was an of
age yet here, but I think over there at sixteen,
So I was like, lording, please, now is my time?
How many times can you say that you went skydiving
in Dubai? Like, let's go? What are you? What is
your mental block? With this. Obviously, my mom wasn't going
to come with me, so I was like, Lord and
come on. He said no. So I was like, okay,
when I turned eighteen, we're going in Miami. Wait. So
(32:55):
Lording had already gone no, but I'm never gone. Gordon
hates all that. I want to go in Dubai and
he said no because I was of age over there
but not over here. So when we were over there,
I was like please please, he was like no. I
was like all right, and my mom wasn't gonna go
with me, so I was like, I guess I'm screwed.
I'm not gonna go by myself. That's like really weird.
So so then whatever last year, I was turning nineteen
(33:18):
because eighteen it was during quarantine. I couldn't really do much.
So I turned nineteen. I was like, I didn't tell him.
I just called booked for six people, like a plane
for six people. And I was like, I'm doing this.
I don't care who comes with me, I don't know whatever.
So I just called on and I'm like, hey, we
have skydiving book this day. At this time, it was
the morning after my birthday celebration. What a huge dinner
(33:42):
like crazy at Marianna was like a huge party, was
so fun. I always go super hard for my birthday.
Is obviously life is worth celebrating. Yeah, so then um
whatever we went the next morning we had gone to space,
then one skydiving um, and then we drove to Homestead
and me my best friend Sabrina went Tomizo sub Girl,
(34:03):
her brother came and one of Lodon's friends and Lordon
went and Lordon hated it. He hated it. He looked
like he liked it not he like he had like
a huge not a panic. When he landed, he was
just like in cold sweats, like couldn't breathe because it's
it's intense. You know when you're on those spinny things
in the playground and you get off super dizzy. They
(34:24):
do that with the parachoot. They go like that and
you start spinning, so you get down super dizzy. I
felt like I was hung over the rest of the
day when like I had a drink or anything, like,
I was just like yeah. So then I knew my
mom would say no, So I just like booked paid
for and then I was like I'll tell her after
I'll show her the video. So then god, I would never.
(34:46):
And I was the first one out of the plane.
I was first, and then all the skydiving videos like
they take a go pro video individually, and I'm talking
to my mom the whole time. I'm like hey, Mom,
like i'll see you soon hopefully, you know, like whatever.
So then we jump out of the plane and I
went first, and you see in the video aload and
go like ah. He freaked out. He was like dying.
He wanted to kill me. He was like, I'm never
(35:08):
doing that ever again. I hate you for booking this
without telling me. I was like, you could have said no,
I didn't put a gun to your head. An So
then whatever. We get home and my mom sees our
hair like all over the place. It looked like we
had been in a fight. We all looked so rough
because we walked and we all wanted to throw up.
We were just so nauseous. And then we had to
drive all the way back from Homestead. We got there
(35:29):
like at eight in the morning, and we got home
at six because we were the last plane to go.
It's like first come, first serve. Even if you booked
it out a certain time, you have to wait for
So we were the last plane of the day. We
went out like five. So then we walked in and
my mom was like, did you guys go skydiving? Because
she sees the certificate with like the little parachute on it,
(35:50):
and we're like, sit down, and we showed her the video.
She started dying of laughter. My mom gets My mom
doesn't get mad at me for the things she should
get mad at me for, and then she'll like ground
me for leaving the house slides Lena, do you remember
(36:18):
meeting gem for the first time? Um? Wasn't it at
the funeral? Oh? Yis might have been. Didn't you go
to New Year's Eve with your mom and your brother? Where? Oh? Then, yeah,
I was in New York. But I didn't know you
guys were dating even at the funeral. You want to
(36:39):
know how I found out you guys were dating Because
you guys kissed in front of me, And that's how
I found out you were lesbian. I thought this whole time, like, remember, yes,
I remember we were at the day after the funeral
was Father's Day, So you guys are at the funeral
together everything, and then the next day we're at your
parents house for Father's Day and it's us three in
the pool and we're just like playing around, like jumping
(37:00):
in the pool whatever, and then you guys just kissed.
I was like, oh oh. I was like, oh, they're dating.
I'm a lesbian. What do you think? Would you think
I was just like some random girl that sort of
showing up to the family stuff. I don't know, like
a friend would first goddle comes to all my family things.
(37:24):
My friends, No, all my best friends always come to
my family things. So then I don't know. I was
just like, oh, I think it's a good way to
do it. Just ripped the band aid right off. Yeah.
I literally had no idea that you were even like
the slightest bit Gay's younger than I remember somebody asking
you once in front of me. They were like, oh,
when did you like know m was like gay and
you were like always. I was like, actually I didn't
(37:46):
until she kissed jump in front of me. We were
in the pool, and I was like oh. And then
I called Loden. I remember he was at a basketball tournament.
I was like, did you know? He was like no,
but sick. I was like, all right, by good luck
on your tournament. That's it. That's awesome. No, I love that.
I mean like Natalia, our cousin Natalia, you know she's young,
(38:08):
really young. Yeah, and you know she was like, oh
are you guys sisters? Are you guys do? And I mean,
but you know what, like what she was like, where's
your mob? Like not here? Listen. I remember being a
kid and being like genuinely curious, but it never came
with judgment the same way that before we were talking
about like kids being honest and like just just asking questions,
(38:29):
asking questions. It don't care, they don't care, like and
also there's no reason unless their parents tell them to
also or unless you make them feel like there's something
wrong with it, like if somebody asked you or worry.
Oh nothing, we're you know, we're gay, but don't say anything.
But no, you say, oh, we're together, just like mom
and dad are. Lada was like no, they're girlfriends. You know,
(38:50):
she's like looking at us, she was like, okay, can
we play now? She's like she's like, all right, sick
can we go to But anyway, yeah, I know it's cool.
You know. Sometimes I don't know. So in families sometimes
people are always like, oh, you know, why don't we
talk about it? And whatever. I have that argument with
(39:11):
people all the time. I'm like, because I didn't really know, yeah,
who I really was yet I was figuring it out.
You know, it's whether you're gay or straight. You know,
like your private life, so as long as it's not harmful,
you can stay private. Yeah. Yeah, And I think sometimes
even though even if you know deep down something about yourself,
(39:32):
it's really different to like know it even act on it,
and then like it's so different to vocalize it. Yeah,
it's also up to you whenever you feel ready. So
many people and especially family members, think that they're entitled
to know your business right now that they're like, why
didn't you tell me? I'm like, because I didn't want to. Yeah.
And if there's anything that really your family doesn't really
(39:54):
need to know about, it's like your romantic life, which
is about you know, you and that person but totally
or you know, your stool, your no I send pics
to loudon. Yeah, and you know what, I'm going to
also blame your mom for that, who literally had a book,
Oh my God, of your brother's poop. She still has
our first poops in a box, my mom. You know,
(40:16):
my mom gets attached to like items. But she has
our umbilical cords. She has all our teeth, but we
lost all our teeth. I feel like this is you know,
like I'd be very scared. She has diaries after dark.
Oh god, she has diarrheas. No, she has diaries of
It's like August seven two to Lena discovered her hands,
(40:39):
August whatever, Lena discovered her feet. Lena's first, and she
would like write about it. And it's like a little
book and she has it for both of us, and
a little book with our poop. That's so cute. She's
like teeth and umbilical cord. Lena has eaten her bookers
for the first No, I promised you that's there. I
(41:02):
promise you it's there. Yeah, I want to ask her
to show you, guys. She still has my crib. If
you go to the garage at the lake House, my
crib is in there. Now. You go to the house
one day and she's sleeping in it, reading the journal.
She doesn't get rid of it. I'm like, mom, she
had it in our actual house once, just in the hallway.
I'm like, mom, it makes me really uncomfortable to just
walk by and see my crib. There. Can you please
like donated it. She's like, yeah, I'll donate it. Three
(41:24):
months later, I opened the garage at the lake house.
It's sitting there and I'm telling you. She's like, it's
for your kids. That's cute. Yeah, like rusty vomit right there?
Can we get a new crib? This is my second poop,
really resting my stomach. She still keeps my poops like
that and a container like that, every single poop I
(41:47):
were taken. Oh that's what that was the other day
in the house. I knew there was interesting. We're joking
on the headline, like the has has the poops officially
cassified so that it's like a solid out Probably dude,
that poops twenty some years old years old, that's a
twenty year old poop. This is a joke. Disclaimer, I
(42:08):
don't want people to think that she's Okay, yeah that does.
My mom looked through my poop for my first tooth.
That fine, like but also fine, see yous. Weird about
this is that it's also something that's passed down through generations.
(42:29):
I've learned because Emily, when we first started dating, I
opened up a drawer in the kitchen like right on top,
right on top of where the wine was, which is
like weird placement. And it was a freaking zip lock
bag of a Lula's teeth. I'm like, why you why
you have a Lula's teeth? What are you gonna do
with a cute they are? But what are you doing
(42:52):
with it? Staring at them? You know, like, why are
you keeping it? It's cool? I just made an earring. No,
I'm kidding, honestly, that would be at least a little cool. No,
no dog earing dog teeth earring? Yeah, it could be cute.
What else you could be? Creepy? Could be really creepy,
creepy cute. Li'ma being luassas, thank you. Like my family,
(43:20):
I have loved being your cuisine, your prima numero. I'ma
and don't flare your nostrils at me. I love you,
Oh listen, I love you. I've loved growing up with you,
you know, like every family, you know, there have been
(43:41):
moments where we don't talk so much. But I'm glad
to say hopefully that we spend a lot more time
together as we have been because I love it and
the three of us have a great dynamic, and I'm sure,
the more we get to know Sean, the more he's
gonna hate me, because the more all love him and
annoy him. You're the world's funniest human. That funny. He
says that you're so funny that it's almost intimidating. Wow,
(44:03):
you heard that, and she will just put that on
a loop. But anyway, so thank you, thank you for
being with us today. We have deemed you the comic
cousin because yes, just as we have heard, you have
spontaneously joined our flights. You've grabbed onto our wing and
our jet engines and always put a smile or a
(44:23):
look of confusion on our face. So thank you for
being the comic cousin. And gem I believe that we
have something for Lena. Don't we heard that, Lording, I'm
the comic cousin, Lording. We love you. We'll think of
another one for Lording. So Lima, we have something for you, ye,
(44:44):
ra Moral please lean It passed me. Uh yeah, one
of those Nope, one of the records. Yeah what did
you choose? Linda? Run start, Linda run said, And all right,
on this day, Lena Luisses, you are being awarded as
(45:10):
the comic cousin in our own world pod. Open up
your scroll. We are passing her more realistic. Described that
because you know everybody that's listening is audio only. So
described rocks pop rocks from the Journey. They're actually moving rocks.
We got them from planets. We collected them. Are so
(45:32):
blue rospberry best flavor only way. And now I'm opening
the scroll, but it's taped, nube. It's not tape. It's
charge our glue from planets. Well, we love that planet food.
(45:52):
Certificate of Achievement. This certificate is awarded to the comic cousin.
I am a being Louisses a one prank accomplished, perfect
delivery of that I fuck her right in the pussy,
and an international fork connership from Jeminy Hernandez and Emily
Stefan captain and shorter castin. All right, congratulations, Lena, I
(46:18):
nite the the cod cousin. Yeah, I'm taking my diploma
out of the little FOLDI thing and put it have
some fire holes in it because it actually had to
go through a meteor field to get to us. We
don't have printers in space. All right, Well, Lena, that
was officially your fourth appearance on the show. That's so exciting.
(46:40):
Fourth and last, whenever have you got thank you for being.
I hope that you'll continue to be our silent sidekick
and grace us with interesting knowledge that we have no
need for, but that makes our lives more entertaining. Yes,
I love you, guys, We love you. Are welcome. Got you.
(47:05):
I'll I'll be your mango mamah. Yeah. And if you're
out there listening, pick up the phone and call your cousin.
And if you don't have a cousin, call somebody that
you grew up with that makes you happy and have
a laugh and make your day better by guys, See
you next Moodcast. Bye bye, Thanks for the races. This
(47:32):
is a Moonflower production in partnership with I Hearts Mike
will do that podcast network. For more podcasts, visit the
I Heart Radio app or wherever you listen to your
favorite shows.
Hosts And Creators
Gemeny Hernandez
Emily Estefan
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