March 22, 2023 • 52 mins
In this episode Jill and Aja talk to Laiya about her physical and spiritual journey with fibroids post removal. Fibroids affect 8 out 20 Black women in the United States. For more information on the bill Vice President Kamala Harris introduced to fund fibroid research check out this article from Essence Magazine:
https://www.essence.com/lifestyle/health-wellness/kamala-harris-fibroid-bill/
Call 866-HEY-JILL and leave us a message with your comments on this episode!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to Jay dot Ill a production of iHeartRadio. Hi Friends.
It's Amber the producer here. I have a quick announcement.
We are having our midseason break. The Legend, the Lady,
the song Dress, the Friend, the mentor, and the mother.
(00:23):
Jill Scott is on tour. If you haven't grabbed your
tickets yet, what are you waiting for? Do that? Immediately?
I saw her show in Philly and wow. I mean, like,
we know she's incredible, but the live experience something else.
While we take a break from releasing new episodes, we're
going to run back some of our favorites from this season,
(00:46):
starting with mine. So a little bit about me. Some
years ago, I had a pretty traumatic experience with an
ob gyn, which I know I'm not alone in because
black woman. And that experience led me to wanting a
deeper understanding and connection to my body and my wom
in particular. So I went on to steady herbalism and
(01:07):
specifically spiritual herbalism with master herbalist Karen Rose. Look her up, y'all,
Karen Rose. Those courses changed my life and my health.
The mind body genetic connection is so real, so it
is no surprise that my favorite episode this season is
the new f word. Enjoy what's up everybody. It is
(01:34):
a pleasure to be with you again. Welcome to Jay
dot Il the Podcast. This is Jill Scott and I'm
here with my sister friends. Lie is Saint Cloud. Hello everybody,
and the infamous song on your commercial commercials age a
(01:54):
great and Dan's la Hello there, Hello all, sound like
a life in bed? Yes, she is slish. Somebody getting licensed?
That's what commercial? Is it? Ada or I don't even know?
That's funny what song is in the world of publishing.
In the world of publishing, you know, record companies own
(02:16):
the copyright, so the permission really wasn't mine to get.
But because I own the publishing, gotta pay me. There
you go, so they can use it all they want to.
But guess what you give me my quins, your queens. Yeah,
(02:38):
but don't say I told you to take that medicine.
I don't know what that medicine is. Y'all better read, laugh, y'all, listen,
y'all better do all y'all's due diligence. Don't say Kendren
told you to do it. Here, it's just a nice song.
It's a nice song, you know. That goes for all medication,
(03:00):
you know, anything that you take out you here the
commercials they're always talking about, oh when this will help
you with whatever your your footage it, but it also
will make your eye levels fall out and you push
because anything that makes your cause to know. For me,
it's the may cause it's priorities. I don't want either,
(03:27):
you know what I'm saying, Thank you so much. I
don't want either. I don't want to die or I
don't want my COUCHI this thing, and I don't want
to die with stinky coop word up worked because you know,
whoever is in the mortgage is gonna talk about you. Um,
I'm gonna stop, y'all gotta can we not just can
(03:50):
y'all not make me laugh? Y'all know it's a situation.
Situation my family and friends is that ideas La Saint
Clair has had some fibroids removed from her body. So
now for yeah, if you will, what um Just for
(04:12):
anybody who who doesn't know, UM, what fibroids are, It's
like it's like a tumor. Some of them are big,
some of them are small. UM. But they are tumors
that are typically in the uterus. Right, but nine tumors
in the uterus that are getting in the way of
(04:39):
of what you're feeling. I've done. Somebody get my pocketbook now,
where where my fucking keys? Yes, is not making this easy,
I swear to go mak me laugh to not laugh.
Don't laugh because this is recent. This is very recent
for her. Yes, and and um, the how how would
(05:02):
you you know? You know, because the uterine fibroids, it
causes like majorum excessive bleeding for your monthly um, a
pelvic pain um which can be excruciating out here, and
that um frequent urination, not being able to hold on
(05:26):
to uh to your water. Yeah, you know, women are
walking around every day with fibroids and not knowing what's
going on. And don't forget infertility and anemia. Sure wow,
because if you're losing that much blood, your iron is
kind of like fucked right, Yeah, and that makes you
(05:48):
makes it kind of and it doesn't make it kind
of difficult, but it makes it hard to um do
all the things that we have to do. Yeah, you know,
because you're exhausted, you're you're losing a lot of blood.
You don't have iron to period apps. Yeah, I got
two period apps. Oh period, we got a two period apps.
(06:08):
We have to start before the surgery though, like we
really have to go. How did you know that you
had five broids or what ticked you off? Because just
gave some of the symptoms, but explain. I think it
was like a typical trip to my ob g y N.
And you know, it got to the point where you
can feel five broids, usually from a girl's stomach, like
(06:30):
you can touch them. I don't like to because I
don't like to know that. I didn't like to know
they were there. But my doctor one day just touched
and was like, huh, there's something there. And so I
think I got an ultra sound. And that was over
a decade ago, and they weren't they were outside of
my uterus. So at the time the doctor was like,
this is not gonna, you know, prevent you from having children,
so you don't have to act on it immediately, you know,
(06:52):
And so I didn't. And ten years later they got
bigger and bigger and I knew I had. They were like,
you know, it looks like you have like three but
they started saying, you love, you have three oranges in
your belly and you're probably I love the line. I
think a lot of women five raids have heard the line,
you look at least four months pregnant. So yeah, As
(07:12):
that progressed and I started getting older and they started
getting bigger, I finally said I need to do something
about this, even if and if they were blocking my breath,
my blessings, because y'all know I'm in between on this
baby thing. But you know, I got a good year.
Don't tell anybody before I just you know before it's
like yeah, So yeah, I decided, And of course there's
with five roids, some women had the option of doing
(07:35):
a laparoscopically, and the reason I couldn't because mines were
way too big. So I had to get up my inmectomy,
which is what I hear similar to a C section cut,
and he had to go in and I was told
I had ten and I sent y'all a picture of
twenty eight twenty eight and the largest one. One of
(07:55):
my girlfriends likes to compare the largest one to a roaster.
She's like that it's like a roaster, yea, because I
would say that that's a great foul ter, like a
chicken roaster. Right as you cook a chicken roaster. It
was Yeah, I would say that the picture did look
like that, but it was shocking. You know, you hear
the word five boys, and I hate to say it.
(08:17):
It's become so normalized. The majority of my girlfriends have
a story. I don't know about y'all, but the majority
of my girlfriends have a story. Yeah. I wouldn't say them. Yeah,
I wouldn't see the majority, but definitely within my friend
group more than one. Yeah. Yeah, so there's a situation here. Um,
but I think in my mind I kept thinking, Okay, yeah,
(08:39):
I know this happens. I know it's a mask, I
know it's this. There was something about actually seeing the
photo that I was just like wow. I got to
sit with that for a minute, and I was just
like mmmmm, Well, first off, I'm looking at you, and
I just I haven't seen you, but i'm looking at
you in video. Now y'all don't know this, but I'm
(09:00):
looking at her to the video and I just want
to embrace you and hug you because all the greatness
that you've been and not unknowing you were carrying all that.
It's like I'm looking at you and I'm I'm angry
because I'm like, why do we have to walk through
(09:22):
the world with this and there's not anything being done.
And that's the thing, and that's the thing that starts
to make me angry because although I know you said
you have one girlfriend, but I swear the guy y'all
every time this week, in the last couple of weeks,
every time I talk to a black woman, it goes, yeah,
I'm getting over this. Mynamecting me. Oh yeah, girl, I
had a mint a couple of years ago. I swear
(09:43):
that's the conversation. And it's all sisters. And I know
we're not one hundred percent. I think the numbers are seventy,
but it's enough that really makes you wonder. It's enough
that Kamala Harris allegedly has a task force to find
out what's going on with it, and which makes me
wonder about her as a black woman who hasn't had
any children yet. It's just so many of these stories
(10:06):
going around that is so common that we don't talk about.
And then our mothers it was something different for them.
It wasn't a name, it wasn't a name for it then.
So it's kind of scary back to what you were saying,
Asia in the sense of this epidemic that's happening with
black women and the no sense of urgency, and black
men are learning, but they're surprised, like they just people
(10:29):
just don't know, don't And we just walked through it,
like you know how we are as sisters. We just
we talked to each other. You talk amongst themselves and
we're gonna take a quick break and then we'll be
right back. I was talking to my girls and I
(10:57):
was like, yo, what and y'all too. I was like,
you know, you're aposed to do four to six weeks recovery.
What does that look like? What I'm supposed to be doing,
Like after a week, I'm supposed to like lay down,
like I don't know how to rest? Like what I
was looking at you. I was about to ask y'all
as women who are like gave birth, like they told
y'all to rest afterwards or recuperate, and what I don't
(11:21):
see y'all doing that. Well, I'm not even gonna lie
to you. After childbirth, I was told to rest. I
had home birth, so I had midwives who made me
stay in bed. But typically that's not the practice. The
practices you get two days in that hospital, some in
some cities, one day and they want you out of there,
(11:42):
get up, walk around, pick up the baby, handle it. Yep. So,
but you still supposed to rest when you go home. No, girl,
and all ain't set up like that. It's not set
up like that. I called some villagers in, but I
guess I guess that wasn't really on the agenda when
(12:05):
I called, you know, so, I at a certain point,
I was so hungry that I got up, went down
a flight of steps and made breakfast for everybody, because
I'm like, I'm supposed to eat. I know that I
can't produce milk without eating, but I think everybody else
(12:27):
was probably on some kind of vacation or something. That part. Yeah, yeah,
the typical experience is the opposite. And when you're talking
about rest after a major surgery, that kind of inconsistency.
It doesn't change just because you have major surgery because
you have a baby, because that same lack of kind
(12:50):
of support and systems and resources and things of that
nature for black women, for women in general, but particularly
for black women, it rears its ugly head at these
moments when we're down. I'm always saying this, and you know,
we could talk about this another time, but it's like,
who comes for the black woman when she down band?
You know what I'm saying, Who comes for her for real?
(13:11):
When she down bad? I know my mom could have come,
but she was taking care of my grandmother and she
was in her last days, so you know, we had
to pick and shoot. But even in that sense, you know,
my mom is here taking care of me. I'm so
blessed and grateful that she could come from DC to California.
But shot, my mom don't know how to rest, so
(13:33):
she knows how to take care of me. Yeah, she's
doing a fantastic job. But it's it's it's interesting. And
you know I was telling Amber, you know why the
doctors tell you. You know, my doctor said, I'm doing
really good. I'm I was so happy when he called
and checked on me, because you know, you gotta poop
to get at the hospital. You gotta you gotta pass
(13:55):
that gas. I passed that gas. You know, you gotta
have your number two. And it's interesting. I will say this.
While I was in a hospital. You know, my mom
is a great advocate, and so I watched her a lot,
so I try to be a good advocate for myself.
And on my first night, after my first night, I
hadn't pouty yet and they were still trying to let
me out there. They were trying to They were like,
if you want to go home, you can go home.
(14:17):
They had already gave me one bag of blood. By
the next day, I needed two bags of blood. So
if I would have gone home, I would have never
got those two bags of blood that I needed, and
I would have been home. And it made me. It
made me think of some country star's wife just died
last week because she went home too soon after cosmetic surgery.
But it just all all the things that you're not
(14:37):
prepared for in that way, and then coming home and all.
Like I said, although I was doing well shit for
a day, I was busting out in tears. I didn't
notice this thing. I didn't know it affected me like this.
Like so I was happy to talk to Amber our
produced her because she kind of put it in a
different way. I hadn't thought about this holistically, you know
(14:58):
what I mean, in the sense of what Amber would
you say, having a removing a whole basket of fruit
out of my uterus, a whole basket of fruit from
your uterus. Yeah and yeah, and just to comment, you
guys say, you know so many other black women who've
had fibroids. The statistic is eighty percent of Black women
have fibroids some some form, whether they know it or not,
(15:19):
whether they know it or not, yeah, whether they're smaller
ones or bigger ones. So why should anybody care? Why
do they know it or not? And that's the part
that makes me mad, because I'm like, why it does
give near like a that's an epidemic. That is an epidemic.
It is an epidemic. And when you think about, like,
the way that I learned about fibroids and herbalism is
(15:40):
that there are bodies way of like trapping energy. Their
trauma is trapped and they may not all be from
you or from your experience. They can be from your
line generationally, right, But Yeah, there's so much energy that's
trapped in our wombs that we've carried generation to generation,
especially as Black women. When you think about what our
great great grandmothers went through, what women when they're doing slavery, um,
(16:03):
you know, and we've just had this huge disconnect from
our wombs and Like when Leah, when you said you
didn't even your doctor told me, you told you could
touch it, you could feel it, and you didn't want
touch it. That says so much to me, Like you
wouldn't even touch it, like, no, not touching that. No,
this is my and this is my first surgery. Yeah yeah,
and those are but these are things that you're holding
(16:24):
in your wombs and you're literally disconnecting yourself from it,
like you didn't want to touch it for ten years. Yeah,
and now I took Today was the day I took
the surgical tape off, and that was like a whole
moment in itself. And scared to get the C section
shelf when you ain't even had the baby yet. Oh God,
there's things we can do for that. We can talk
(16:44):
about that because I have had a C section as well.
But um, but even just back to that clearing up
your womb and then the emotions that you're talking about feeling.
Think about that you had twenty eight fibroids removed from you.
That's an immense clearing and immense clearing physically and spiritually,
(17:06):
Like imagine how your body feels. Just got to let
that go. I'm excited to get to that point because
right now I'm in the middle where you're just swollen.
So I'm excited to get to feel the light light partness. Yeah,
whenever they're happy. So can we talk quickly about that
four to six weeks of recovery and like and how
you're saying, like I don't I don't know how to recover.
(17:28):
I think that's also a systemic issue with black women
that we've carried because we weren't allowed to recover, right
and like how you said, like this just happened, You're
still swollen. Your womb is still swollen. So there's four
to six weeks of nourishment you need to give yourself
and that it may not necessarily mean sitting down all
day or arresting all day, which you should do a
lot more of that. But that's like, what are you
nourishing your body with? How are you helping your womb recover?
(17:51):
Are you replenishing that with good foods? Are you taking
herbs that are helping and you're healing. Are you listening
to your womb because you had been talking years and
you wouldn't touch her, so now that she's clear, how
are you communicating with her. How are you connecting with
her every day in these fords recovery? And that's and
that's tough work. I'm not I'm not saying that in
(18:12):
a lightweight either, because I know that that is tough,
deep work because I did it after a c section,
a really traumatic one where I almost died, and like
having to sit with my womb and having to sit
with that trauma afterwards, is that's deep work. But that's
part of your freedom as well. That's how we really
get free. That's how we don't get no more fibroids.
That's how we really let our wombs shine and connect
(18:32):
to that. Our womb is our seat of power as
a woman. Well, I guess some marangua girl. I'm about
the one around. I'll tell you about to run and
show throughout this right now, everything you get on the
(18:59):
very leaf on that nettles you talk about all the
blood that you lost. Just figure out the things you
need to do to renourish your body for what it
went through, what it's carried you through. And like, yes, Asia,
like we should all be running around screaming when our
sister gets our freedom, Like that's how we should feel,
That's how we should feel because you're making space. Yes,
(19:23):
I'm gonna circle back to something that you said about
the disconnect and not wanting to touch it and this
kind of disconnect from our bodies as Black women, this
kind of disconnect from the body. I just want to
sit with that for a second, because I think there's
something that tells us that our bodies are this thing
that's outside of us. When this was a thing that
(19:44):
we used to be like everything dictated. It's like you're
going to dictate the weather or knowing that body, you're
going to decide a number of things based on what
that body is doing and telling you whether you're going
to walk in that room, whether you're going to take
that bus, whether you're going to do whatever. It's like
your body is this thing that you're supposed to be
(20:05):
so in tune with, But I know we've learned to
kind of put our bodies to step outside of our
bodies and not really be connected to it. Even from
a sexual standpoint. The amount of women that don't even
know anything about their vagina or their uterus or the
different parts of their body. We've talked on the show
(20:25):
about pleasure and about our disconnect from how our body,
how to pleasure ourselves or have our partners pleasure us,
you know, all of the different things. There's so many
levels to this disconnect, this way that we are allowing
things to grow there and not pulling the weeds and
not paying and tending to ourselves. And it's like it goes,
(20:47):
it goes so much further. And now we're dealing with
this epidemic that's going on with black women and we
can no longer ignore it. But part of me feels
this that there's something about this generation of women that
is doing some work that is different from prior generations.
And so perhaps they are pushing these things out and
(21:11):
pushing them into a corner and they're becoming these masses
to a sense, were like, you know, you know how
something gets really bad because you're about to expel that joker,
you know what I'm saying, Like it's condensing itself so
that it can be expelled, you know, whereas that trauma
used to be spread throughout that I feel like we
as a generation are doing some different work because we're
(21:34):
speaking in ways our moms didn't or had the room too.
It's so crazy to me. I mean, I guess it's
not crazy. It is a patriarchal society that they spend
so much time on erectile dysfunction and so much money
on erectile dysfunction. I was in Miami not too long ago,
(21:56):
and we took the tour where you ride around on
the boat and you get to see all the rich
people's houses and stuff. And the guy who created viagra.
When I tell you the house was it was so massive.
They told us that the guy and his wife live
in this house alone. And you know, I've seen houses
(22:17):
with wings before, but it had it had more wings
than the bird need to fly. It was. It was
a lot. I mean, as he deserved. Even if people
failed the need. That wasn't I understand. But we're talking
about the continuance of humanity part still this this major
emi portion of a woman's body fertility, Yes, and that
(22:45):
is and the crazy thing about viagra, And don't get
me the line, but I want to say I did
read this or see a video about it, that viagra
itself was found by accident. When they were trying to
find they were trying they were testing out like some
sort of cancer like ja. They founded by accident, and
instead of continuing the cancer research Hello to save people's lives.
(23:07):
They shifted and started making the erection saving medicine like
it's in someone and accidentally finding cure for fibroids. You know,
come on, I'm just saying, you know, in a world
where we're you know, we're we're ridding ourselves a row
versus way because you know, we should be having more babies.
It's it's just, you know, it's fascinating that we have
(23:30):
this epidemic where it's killing Black women's fertility. It's like,
whose babies are we trying? Worried about whose fertility are
we really work? I think it's really interesting that Layah,
your mother and my mother had the same story that
in youth. Yeah, they told her mother that she'd never
have children and that she should get a hyster direct
(23:50):
to me. That's right, I remember. And they told your
mother to have a hysterirect to me before you were born,
just like before I was born. Oh yeah, I feel
like I feel this is damn near wart and you
really think about what's going on right now. As again,
man bro versus weight and can get you fucking I'm
(24:13):
just saying it could, it could fuck you up. A
hypocrisy of it is insane. Yeah. I did an interview
one time for Parents magazine about and someone called me
and said they wanted to talk about black women in infertility.
And I said, I don't know if y'all want to
call me, I'm probably not the right person to talk
to you talk to about this. And what was interesting
was she said, no, I do want to talk to
(24:34):
you about it. And we talked about my culture in
the way that we're all socialized to believe what black
women can and cannot do with their bodies. And you
said that this is killing black women's fertility, and yet
there is still an assumption throughout our society as that
puts black women as the as the forever fertile, She's
the woman that's having all the babies. And it's like
(24:57):
and that is and it leaves a conversation and away
from a section of our mean, a large portion of
black women that are not being addressed because they're being
completely erased. They're not even part of the conversation. It's
like they're they're acting like like this is not a
thing that is happening so close to the norm, that
(25:19):
this is some sort of fringe experience, and it's like
It is amazing to me that is still the culture
of this country, and even within the black community, we're
just not talking about it. And then when celebrities talk
about it, there's also this thing, oh, well, that person
is just they're successful, and so that's this thing that
happens to black women who are this or that, but
(25:41):
not the average black women. You talk about eighty percent,
eighty percent, eighty eighty percent. We'll be back after the break.
(26:06):
If you've noticed that your wife or your girlfriend, or
your sister, or your aunt, or your mother or your
friend is having a really heavy menstrual flow, excessively heavy,
if you're if you're and painful, if you're noticing these things,
if you're noticing that this is a youthful person but
(26:26):
they're having a hard time holding the water, you know
you have to please suggest them to see a guy
in ecologist somewhere. The challenging portion is that initially when
I moved to Tennessee, I'm just gonna speak on my
own experience. I'm searching around trying to find a guy
(26:46):
in ecologist, because that's what adult women do, you know,
we make sure to maintain our coucci. And I could
not find um, and I could not get an appointment
or a first time. You want the first time? I appointment? Honey,
six months, I couldn't get an appoint to me the
first time. Yeah, you gotta get in the system first,
you gotta get in. Yeah that's six six months from now,
(27:09):
six months months yeah, months, Like that's insane. It's interesting.
I was thinking when agians talking about the celebrity aspect,
because you know, usually you can match an issue with
a celebrity. This is not one of those issues. I
was thinking, the only time I've heard is being spoken
about on television, and I know y'all are like, yeah,
here you go. You're talking about Cynthia Bailey. Yeah, yes, yes, yes, yes,
(27:40):
because she had five words in the way that the
way that I remember Peter said some shit that really
fucked me up because he just made a comment about
how it was hard to have sex with her sometimes,
and I was like, the fuck And she went into
her five or situation and so wow, because sex is
(28:03):
an issue sometimes with five rights here and it was
noticeable because she was a model and right right, so
it's like clearly something is wrong. But you know, I like, yeah,
I never looked at you once and thought, oh, you
look four months pregnant. You never looked four months pregnant
(28:23):
to me ever, But I was like, all right, I
can look like this. What I was saying is that
this is more this is more recent. But the brat
was talking about this here recently, right, she's newly married.
She was talking about having a baby. And there was
(28:44):
Judy five boys, yes, that five boys being an issue
for her and I and it was circulating quite a
bit on the internet, I mean on social media. But
they were talking about that, and I said, wow, that's
probably one of the few times that I've seen the
celebrity also talk about fibroids. And it's you know, fitting
at this time period, because honestly, there is a little
(29:06):
bit more conversation going on about it than I remember
having in the past, but still not even close to enough.
And then also to like the study like studying black women.
I remember, as someone sent me an article years ago
about how black women are just not studied, like we
just there's not enough research about our bodies. So most
(29:30):
times even treatments and medicines and things like that are
not really catered towards any kind of study. That happened
that any extensive study that's happened around our bodies and
our lived experience. Just recently, they started to paint the
examples brown, all the examples of the uterus and the
(29:52):
baby in utero, and and all the they were never.
They were never brown people, never brown babies, never brown bodies. Never.
And I would it's interesting. I would like Amber to
talk about this because one of my random girlfriends hit
me up the other day. Again. We were like, what
you're doing recovering? She was like, oh, I had it too,
And then she sends me an article about well my
girlfriend had she had another girlfriend who had like I
(30:14):
don't know, fifty but she got rid of them naturally.
Now I said to her, I'm not going to read
this article right now because I just had a Maya mactimate.
And I don't mean I don't kind of regrets. Don't worry,
it will spell it for you in your phone. But
I do know this sugar and diet and things of
that nature. But my thing is it sounds like, if
(30:36):
you really want to get rid of five words naturally,
you just don't. You don't eat nothing that you want
to eat, and you live a life of strict discipline.
But yeah, Amber, can you speak on this whole natural
way of getting rid of these fire So I want
you got all the ut my approaches an RBS. I
believe there's a like a symbiotic relationship between Eastern and
Western medicine. I don't believe you have to be all
(30:57):
natural or you have to be all this. I think
that they can really work together, and I wish more
people had that attitude towards it, like they can work together.
You can have amiam to me, because maybe that's what
you needed, you know, Like I feel like if someone
has the level of fibroids that you have, trying to
clear that naturally would take a decade, you know what
I'm saying. So I believe, like you know, like I
(31:18):
don't think that you made the wrong choice at all
or you should have any regrets about your journey. It's
all about how you move from here, because now that
you've had this clearing, how are you now going to
nourish your body? There's no way to be perfect or
live talks and free anyways, So like that's not the answer.
Have the things that you want and moderation, you know,
take your herbs, take care of your body, being connected
with your body. I personally think that's the biggest piece,
(31:39):
Like are you connected and are you listening when something
is off so that you can adjust? You know, are
you are you in touch with your body? Are you
taking that four to six weeks to listen to her
and learn her talk to her? So I'm not bad.
I'm not bad for getting cut and not just cutting sugar,
because I mean, I do feel like if that is
a to do it, at some point, maybe I should listen.
(32:04):
I'm gonna tell you. I'm gonna tell you what I
used to tell people about, well about childbirths, but oh
I want to have natural childbirths or should I have?
I feel bad because I got drugs or this, that
and the other, and I'm like, listen, when that baby comes.
Nobody's gonna give you a metal honey. You're not gonna
get a star, You're not gonna get an award, you're
(32:25):
not gonna get a certificate for none of that. That's
why you have to make a decision that works for you.
If you had done it naturally, guess what guests who
would have showed up at your doorstep with with a trophy? Nobody? Okay,
you have to wake up in the morning and be
(32:46):
okay with your decision and how you listen to your
body and your experience. And I'm tired as we get
shamed for enough shit. Come on, can we just start
marking something thing off of this list of things that
we have to fucking be in order for everyone to
feel comfortable? Girl, please, I had to get over the
(33:08):
guilt of having a white male doctor for a second.
I was like, oh Lord, jesus cha, but he was
so good. He was great, a great surgeon. And yeah,
so yeah, you're right, Asia, We're working. I'm speaking for
all its folks listening. We're working through it. You write
no medals of being given here. I'm glad you brought
(33:30):
it up, though, because again, these are the things that
go on in our minds and we don't discuss them,
we don't say them publicly, and we just sit with that.
And it's more sitting, and it's more thinking, and it's
more mulling, and it's more things that are backing themselves
up in our emotions and our thoughts and our bodies,
and it's just we can't do this anymore to ourselves.
(33:50):
I saw something was it a might have been yesterday
where a young woman was talking about I think it
was like American horror story happening. I've watching too. I
love those two jail Yeah, I'm glad to see it. Um.
And the young woman on the show said that fear
(34:13):
wasn't our biggest enemy. It's shame. Oh yeah, I like it.
That thing hit different, thann't it? It hit different? So
like have the shame of having or choosing to as
a somebody that you know, maybe holistic, having surgery. Listen,
(34:34):
you know, that's that's about going into in itself and
listening to yourself for real. It's it's about making a
decision for real and in the quietest place for was
what benefits you the most? And um that's it, honey,
That's that's really the gist of it. You know. I like,
(34:54):
I'd like whatever said about having a doctor that is
both um or choosing you know, doctor that is both
holistic and you know, certified board h MD. I only
know of one. I'm sure there's others. Um. I definitely
invite all doctors that are INDs to get into some
(35:15):
holistic medicine as well and make that a part of
your practice. You have to do it. You know quietly,
but nonetheless. You know we're talking about doctor Frederick Burton,
yes on City Line Avenue, Philadelphia. Yeah, I think I've
heard of him. Okay, all right, all right. It's it's
a lot of blood tests, I'll say. And the tests
(35:36):
are not for when when someone takes your blood, typically
they're testing for what they're looking for. Only with a
holistic doctor, they're testing for everything everything, any any insufficiency,
any abnormality. Um, they're looking for that, you know, any
(35:59):
customers shouldn't. You can get to your doctor too about
that too. I forget, but there's a way to get
your labs and really have him go through everything. I
can't remember the terminology, you know. But yet you're right, Jill, Yeah,
I'm more than more than anything. Um, it's the kind
of general uptick and self awareness and that kind of
general uptick and just saying I want more out of
(36:22):
my interactions with my caregivers and stretching your village, you know,
expanding your village and things like that. I know, I
know that. It's just like, Okay, it's just more goddamn
black girl homework. I'm here for trying to get that
(36:46):
money for them. Man, I'm going to get that money
for the rent. But it feels good too. I wouldn't
want to be nothing else. No, no, And I gotta said,
but I could tell that it can get a little
heavy having the list of things that you have to
do to counteract the systems that are working against you.
So it's like, oh, well, I gotta do this, we
(37:07):
gotta do that. I gotta go to go therapy, I
gotta work out, I gotta take merbs, I gotta have this,
I gotta have that. But about in its twenty four
hours and a goddamn day, you still got to earn
a coin. Yeah, so I get I get it that
it's a lot, but it's it's it's a necessary thing
to get closer to a place of peace. Yeah, it's
(37:29):
it's the labor of finding peace. Right. It's still lighter
than what your mama and your grandmama went through. And
even though it feels heavier, sometimes it only feels heavier
because you have more resources and words. M hmmm. Yeah,
those resources and words are heavy, but you have them
and they didn't. So knowledge is power, and a burden
(37:52):
curls speaking. I'll run, y'all want me to run, y'all?
Say something. Did I say y'all around? I love you?
How about the whole of your holding to this table.
We're just trying to help, just trying to help. Who
(38:15):
more real talk after the break. We need to be healthy.
We have we have this amazing gift of life. There's
so much to do with it. There's so much to see,
there's so much to taste, there's so many people to encounter,
(38:38):
people to love, people to learn from experiences, like, there's
so much to do. So, you know, we want you
and it takes a lot to manage all its dopeness. Yes,
you know what I'm saying. We want you to to
pay attention to your body, really really pay attention to it.
(38:59):
I'm I'm guilty. So just don't please don't listen to
this like, oh, you know she's doing everything she can.
I feeling fuck up. Okay, I'm trying to get some
probiotics right into the smoothie or something. Put the key
(39:21):
for the key, forer key for her whatever the stuff
it tastes like vinegar. I can't do that with the
bottom with the balls at the but she talking about apples,
apple cider, vinegar, chia. I can't do that. Listen. You
can do all of it if you if you got
(39:41):
if your smoothie game is right, son, and you know
how to layer that john up. If you put the
chia in there, when you put the first layer of juice,
that ship will disappear and you never know it's in there.
Come on, man, I've come on. I okay, I said it.
I don't bit No, I don't like smoothes. No, I don't.
(40:02):
I don't like salmon. I'm not eating. I can't. I
can't put nothing nothing. I can't do it. But I
bet but I bet a bitch eat a salmon cake.
But I bet a bitch eat a salmon cake. I
eat my my mother's. That's the only salmon cake I'll eat.
I'll eat my mother's. But I said, how you get
(40:24):
your old megas? If you have the oils you want,
you you drink the oil. Trees have no choice. Okay,
are you making me sweat? I need you to drink
the oils, and I need you to. I mean, I
like smoothies, but they're not a part of my daily life.
I don't. I mean I don't like y'all. Y'all got
a vita mix like a vitam, they'd be pushing those
at the costco hard. I'd rather juice, and that's that's
(40:49):
a lot of work too. But a lot of work,
don't y'all know? Can't it? Just? Can't we just okay?
So part of our reparations, can I just get a
white lady to come over here and make the stuff
for me? Please? John? But juice? You got a smoothie
place or something? I don't know what I mean my
own personal white ladies who say white ladies make the
best smoothies. Oh my god, y'all, I didn't say they
(41:11):
make the best movie. See that you said something I
ain't say. I just want to use a label I
don't want. I'm not using, okays, See, but you're trying
to reverse this. I don't feel like making the smoothie
and cleaning the juice, so I am. I am about
to ask no black woman. Cannot y'all just stop the
world with this announcement? I cannot believe that Agia and
Jail y'all both don't work with the smoothes. Y'all are
like that. I didn't say it for the movie out
(41:36):
part of my daily life is what I had said.
Oh we gotta do something. We gotta do something. How
are you gonna get there? Because you know you ain't
gonna just take the sea mass in your mouth. You
know you gotta put it. Sometimes you gotta push it
in the smoothie that you don't want to take. That's
what different, No, that's what we different. I will take
a spoonful of sea mass. Quit easy like that, soak
mine and blended, and I'll take a See I like
(41:58):
to be done with my stuff. I just like hold
my nose and take it. And and now yes that
doesn't bother me. And also too, like I said, they
also make the flavor sea moss. Now yea from a
good company. Ye want to be all sugary y r right,
But now they have those, you put them in the freezer,
(42:19):
then you take them out, just scoop put a little
spooning and scoop it out. You're right, You're right, gulitely
want to celebrate what a good company for sea moss
is my I do the sea moss gel and I
love it because every time it could be my imagination,
but every time I take it, I swear in every time.
(42:41):
And now what kind of seams are you? Like? Just
a regular. It's like a seams gel. Like I feel
like the sea moss thing is definitely like one of
the gifts of the pandemic, because definitely sea moss became
like a household names in twenty twenty. Yeah, I was like, y'all,
(43:03):
I said, I was like, ain't nobody even talk about
this shit? But I was loving it. Black folks will
see mossing it up and listen, it's Africa because it's
not the Irish sea moss, right, Maybe it's the African right,
just because sometimes I don't know, don't it come out
the ocean. Irish is not where it's where it's from.
(43:26):
You can get Irish sea moss and Jamaica. Just I'm
gonna just say that. It's just what it's called. What
the plants called. Thank you. Listen, somebody out the amber
was like, y'all are here being dumb. Let me get
in here and hit us because they are here being dumb.
Let's stop. Thank you a real black if you take
(43:53):
that Irish buffalo wings, that's not buffalo that right. I'm
just cut the shame. Cut the shame, cut the shame.
You've already discussed this best that is that is the
gist of it all, try your best, and like we've
(44:16):
been saying over and over and over again them to
say again, pay attention to your body. Just pay attention.
I don't listen. Look, look, blessen you smell what's going
on with you before anybody else. Yeah, okay, it's good,
before anybody else. There's literally no reason for somebody else
(44:39):
to tell you about you. But in the words of
the great Jennifer Lewis, come on, if you're sitting shit
long enough, it stops stinking. Oh oh yeah, that's true.
I can't. I can't say that about like, uh, like cats,
people have cats, So the cats the place blind? Yeah,
(45:05):
have the place been like oh, but that's the thing.
That is the I'm telling you, that's the thing. So
listen to your body so you don't go numb to it. Yeah,
oh oh, you know you don't. You don't go deaf
to knowledge like this. I didn't even say that. I
(45:28):
was just building off of missus Lewis. Yes, okay, and
we like, I congratulations to her who she just got
her stall. Yeah, she got kick, she got five boys.
I gotta see things that I wonder now every time
(45:50):
I see a black woman. Oh, no, I'm not. It's
ain't putting that on her. I'm saying when I think
about black single black women. But never mind, y'all know
what I'm about to say, that's gonna be. You're like,
I wonder if that has anything to do yea one
when you find a couple of weeks ago when I
went to see my lady, well that's what. They still
(46:12):
have a small, one, small fibroid in there. And she
was like, it's nothing to worry about right now. And
I was like, okay, you said right now, it's gonna
be something to worry about later. No, you know why
because they tell us that as you approached menopause, they shrink.
So it's like, but there is this small gap if
you're still a fertile myrtle that if they rid of it,
(46:33):
you know you well, no, either way, you probably fertile.
But yeah, a menopause, they start to shrink. Because they
do come back. Some people will get I've known plenty
of women who've gotten fibrates removed at an earlier age.
They come back, they have to get them removed again.
But that really is what Amber was talking about, Like,
has your conversation with yourself change has what you're feeding
(46:54):
yourself change, feeding your mental and your feel like, what
are the conversations you're having with your body? What are
the conversations you're having with yourself? I mean, just all
of these things that rest and recuperation and reprogramming and
resetting and and really figuring out what am I going
to do with this freedom? What am I going to
(47:14):
do with this lightness, this weight that I've allowed to
go away? What do I do to not welcome it back?
I mean, that's part of it too. And if we
haven't been thinking about it. First of all, we ain't
been talking about this, so we most certainly probably as
it has as a community, been talking about the aftermath
of it all. So you know, there's the treatments, there's
the there's the medical treatments, but then there's what is
(47:35):
the life? What is the life you want to live afterwards?
Because like she said, this could be generational. You want
you don't want to give these habits and these ways
of thinking to the next generation of girls and women.
I need like a guide on tape, something, Yeah, tell
me I love. I need that I need for the
next few weeks, some affirmation. I need an app for this,
(47:56):
that's what I'm saying. Oh, baby, I need put it
out there the atmosphere. Hey, ladies out there that had
all the tech girls like, come up with an ask
rest and recovery. Oh, I can't do it too hard
as hard as you. I can't gonna hurt myself. But
I want to do it that hard to Yeah, I know,
she said, soon do herself. What is happening? That is
(48:30):
so good? Baby, one of our babies, one of our nieces.
This is a nephew. Come on, nieces and nephew, y'all
come on, come on, y'all listening exactly what's it called?
Come again? What's it called rest and recovery? As okay, ya,
Auntie's gonna need about ten percent of the deal that
you maybe just maybe five. We'll talk about it. Maybe
(48:55):
give them capitalists society and I need my reparations. I'm
joking only just the only problem is that, you know,
an idea is not something that can be copywritten. I know,
just just give Mama has a day job. Look, Auntie
has a day job. He has an idea, So you
(49:16):
can take that one for free. I got another one
day to come right down. Thing. That's fine. Yeah, you go,
I got another one. Just give us the hook up
so that we know how to do it, that we
know how to rest and explain it properly. Yeah, I'll
take a music, I'll take the chimes, I'll take the herbs.
I'll take it. Let's go. Oh, give it all the
(49:38):
tips for the hat. Okay, okay, okay. Oh give us
what you got, give it to us. I love. Yeah, listen,
this is mutual aid. Hell, I haven't heard that in
a long time. We're working together to figure it out.
We are, y'all. This is a dire though. It's it's gotten,
it's it's it's real serious, m it is. It is
(50:01):
your mom, and it is your aunts and your your
sisters and your girlfriends, and you and your daughter, and
you and me and my babies. Yeah, yeah, the shit
I sweet. Yet another thing to unpack. Uh uh. Put
in the laundry and put in a dryer or hang
(50:24):
it outside. Either way, it must be done. We thank
you so so so so much for listening to Jay
dot Il the podcast. We look forward to sharing information
with you, and we look forward to to learning more
about ourselves as we grow. You are loved, You are
(50:45):
abundant and God damn it, you are worthy. Thank you
so much. Chafts period, How do you eat an elephant? One? By?
(51:06):
It time? Hey, listeners, it's Amber the producer here. Just
another reminder that everyone's body is unique and what may
work for one woman may not work for another. So
if you're suffering from fibroids, work with your medical team
to determine the best course of action for yourself. Leiah
mentioned Vice President Kamala Harris's task voice for fibroids. The
(51:30):
VP did introduce the Uterine Fibroid Research and Education Act
into Congress in twenty twenty. For more information on the act,
I'll drop a link in the show notes. Hi. If
(51:55):
you have comments on something you said in this episode,
call eight six six. Hey Joe, if you want to
add to this conversation, that's eight six six four three
nine five four five five. Don't forget to tell us
your name and the episode you're referring to. You might
just hear your message on a future episode. Thank you
(52:15):
for listening to Jill Scott Presents Jay dot l. The
podcast Ja dot Ill is a production of iHeartRadio. For
more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app Apple podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Welcome to Jay dot Ill a production of iHeartRadio. Hi Friends.
It's Amber the producer here. I have a quick announcement.
We are having our midseason break. The Legend, the Lady,
the song Dress, the Friend, the mentor, and the mother.
(00:23):
Jill Scott is on tour. If you haven't grabbed your
tickets yet, what are you waiting for? Do that? Immediately?
I saw her show in Philly and wow. I mean, like,
we know she's incredible, but the live experience something else.
While we take a break from releasing new episodes, we're
going to run back some of our favorites from this season,
(00:46):
starting with mine. So a little bit about me. Some
years ago, I had a pretty traumatic experience with an
ob gyn, which I know I'm not alone in because
black woman. And that experience led me to wanting a
deeper understanding and connection to my body and my wom
in particular. So I went on to steady herbalism and
(01:07):
specifically spiritual herbalism with master herbalist Karen Rose. Look her up, y'all,
Karen Rose. Those courses changed my life and my health.
The mind body genetic connection is so real, so it
is no surprise that my favorite episode this season is
the new f word. Enjoy what's up everybody. It is
(01:34):
a pleasure to be with you again. Welcome to Jay
dot Il the Podcast. This is Jill Scott and I'm
here with my sister friends. Lie is Saint Cloud. Hello everybody,
and the infamous song on your commercial commercials age a
(01:54):
great and Dan's la Hello there, Hello all, sound like
a life in bed? Yes, she is slish. Somebody getting licensed?
That's what commercial? Is it? Ada or I don't even know?
That's funny what song is in the world of publishing.
In the world of publishing, you know, record companies own
(02:16):
the copyright, so the permission really wasn't mine to get.
But because I own the publishing, gotta pay me. There
you go, so they can use it all they want to.
But guess what you give me my quins, your queens. Yeah,
(02:38):
but don't say I told you to take that medicine.
I don't know what that medicine is. Y'all better read, laugh, y'all, listen,
y'all better do all y'all's due diligence. Don't say Kendren
told you to do it. Here, it's just a nice song.
It's a nice song, you know. That goes for all medication,
(03:00):
you know, anything that you take out you here the
commercials they're always talking about, oh when this will help
you with whatever your your footage it, but it also
will make your eye levels fall out and you push
because anything that makes your cause to know. For me,
it's the may cause it's priorities. I don't want either,
(03:27):
you know what I'm saying, Thank you so much. I
don't want either. I don't want to die or I
don't want my COUCHI this thing, and I don't want
to die with stinky coop word up worked because you know,
whoever is in the mortgage is gonna talk about you. Um,
I'm gonna stop, y'all gotta can we not just can
(03:50):
y'all not make me laugh? Y'all know it's a situation.
Situation my family and friends is that ideas La Saint
Clair has had some fibroids removed from her body. So
now for yeah, if you will, what um Just for
(04:12):
anybody who who doesn't know, UM, what fibroids are, It's
like it's like a tumor. Some of them are big,
some of them are small. UM. But they are tumors
that are typically in the uterus. Right, but nine tumors
in the uterus that are getting in the way of
(04:39):
of what you're feeling. I've done. Somebody get my pocketbook now,
where where my fucking keys? Yes, is not making this easy,
I swear to go mak me laugh to not laugh.
Don't laugh because this is recent. This is very recent
for her. Yes, and and um, the how how would
(05:02):
you you know? You know, because the uterine fibroids, it
causes like majorum excessive bleeding for your monthly um, a
pelvic pain um which can be excruciating out here, and
that um frequent urination, not being able to hold on
(05:26):
to uh to your water. Yeah, you know, women are
walking around every day with fibroids and not knowing what's
going on. And don't forget infertility and anemia. Sure wow,
because if you're losing that much blood, your iron is
kind of like fucked right, Yeah, and that makes you
(05:48):
makes it kind of and it doesn't make it kind
of difficult, but it makes it hard to um do
all the things that we have to do. Yeah, you know,
because you're exhausted, you're you're losing a lot of blood.
You don't have iron to period apps. Yeah, I got
two period apps. Oh period, we got a two period apps.
(06:08):
We have to start before the surgery though, like we
really have to go. How did you know that you
had five broids or what ticked you off? Because just
gave some of the symptoms, but explain. I think it
was like a typical trip to my ob g y N.
And you know, it got to the point where you
can feel five broids, usually from a girl's stomach, like
(06:30):
you can touch them. I don't like to because I
don't like to know that. I didn't like to know
they were there. But my doctor one day just touched
and was like, huh, there's something there. And so I
think I got an ultra sound. And that was over
a decade ago, and they weren't they were outside of
my uterus. So at the time the doctor was like,
this is not gonna, you know, prevent you from having children,
so you don't have to act on it immediately, you know,
(06:52):
And so I didn't. And ten years later they got
bigger and bigger and I knew I had. They were like,
you know, it looks like you have like three but
they started saying, you love, you have three oranges in
your belly and you're probably I love the line. I
think a lot of women five raids have heard the line,
you look at least four months pregnant. So yeah, As
(07:12):
that progressed and I started getting older and they started
getting bigger, I finally said I need to do something
about this, even if and if they were blocking my breath,
my blessings, because y'all know I'm in between on this
baby thing. But you know, I got a good year.
Don't tell anybody before I just you know before it's
like yeah, So yeah, I decided, And of course there's
with five roids, some women had the option of doing
(07:35):
a laparoscopically, and the reason I couldn't because mines were
way too big. So I had to get up my inmectomy,
which is what I hear similar to a C section cut,
and he had to go in and I was told
I had ten and I sent y'all a picture of
twenty eight twenty eight and the largest one. One of
(07:55):
my girlfriends likes to compare the largest one to a roaster.
She's like that it's like a roaster, yea, because I
would say that that's a great foul ter, like a
chicken roaster. Right as you cook a chicken roaster. It
was Yeah, I would say that the picture did look
like that, but it was shocking. You know, you hear
the word five boys, and I hate to say it.
(08:17):
It's become so normalized. The majority of my girlfriends have
a story. I don't know about y'all, but the majority
of my girlfriends have a story. Yeah. I wouldn't say them. Yeah,
I wouldn't see the majority, but definitely within my friend
group more than one. Yeah. Yeah, so there's a situation here. Um,
but I think in my mind I kept thinking, Okay, yeah,
(08:39):
I know this happens. I know it's a mask, I
know it's this. There was something about actually seeing the
photo that I was just like wow. I got to
sit with that for a minute, and I was just
like mmmmm, Well, first off, I'm looking at you, and
I just I haven't seen you, but i'm looking at
you in video. Now y'all don't know this, but I'm
(09:00):
looking at her to the video and I just want
to embrace you and hug you because all the greatness
that you've been and not unknowing you were carrying all that.
It's like I'm looking at you and I'm I'm angry
because I'm like, why do we have to walk through
(09:22):
the world with this and there's not anything being done.
And that's the thing, and that's the thing that starts
to make me angry because although I know you said
you have one girlfriend, but I swear the guy y'all
every time this week, in the last couple of weeks,
every time I talk to a black woman, it goes, yeah,
I'm getting over this. Mynamecting me. Oh yeah, girl, I
had a mint a couple of years ago. I swear
(09:43):
that's the conversation. And it's all sisters. And I know
we're not one hundred percent. I think the numbers are seventy,
but it's enough that really makes you wonder. It's enough
that Kamala Harris allegedly has a task force to find
out what's going on with it, and which makes me
wonder about her as a black woman who hasn't had
any children yet. It's just so many of these stories
(10:06):
going around that is so common that we don't talk about.
And then our mothers it was something different for them.
It wasn't a name, it wasn't a name for it then.
So it's kind of scary back to what you were saying,
Asia in the sense of this epidemic that's happening with
black women and the no sense of urgency, and black
men are learning, but they're surprised, like they just people
(10:29):
just don't know, don't And we just walked through it,
like you know how we are as sisters. We just
we talked to each other. You talk amongst themselves and
we're gonna take a quick break and then we'll be
right back. I was talking to my girls and I
(10:57):
was like, yo, what and y'all too. I was like,
you know, you're aposed to do four to six weeks recovery.
What does that look like? What I'm supposed to be doing,
Like after a week, I'm supposed to like lay down,
like I don't know how to rest? Like what I
was looking at you. I was about to ask y'all
as women who are like gave birth, like they told
y'all to rest afterwards or recuperate, and what I don't
(11:21):
see y'all doing that. Well, I'm not even gonna lie
to you. After childbirth, I was told to rest. I
had home birth, so I had midwives who made me
stay in bed. But typically that's not the practice. The
practices you get two days in that hospital, some in
some cities, one day and they want you out of there,
(11:42):
get up, walk around, pick up the baby, handle it. Yep. So,
but you still supposed to rest when you go home. No, girl,
and all ain't set up like that. It's not set
up like that. I called some villagers in, but I
guess I guess that wasn't really on the agenda when
(12:05):
I called, you know, so, I at a certain point,
I was so hungry that I got up, went down
a flight of steps and made breakfast for everybody, because
I'm like, I'm supposed to eat. I know that I
can't produce milk without eating, but I think everybody else
(12:27):
was probably on some kind of vacation or something. That part. Yeah, yeah,
the typical experience is the opposite. And when you're talking
about rest after a major surgery, that kind of inconsistency.
It doesn't change just because you have major surgery because
you have a baby, because that same lack of kind
(12:50):
of support and systems and resources and things of that
nature for black women, for women in general, but particularly
for black women, it rears its ugly head at these
moments when we're down. I'm always saying this, and you know,
we could talk about this another time, but it's like,
who comes for the black woman when she down band?
You know what I'm saying, Who comes for her for real?
(13:11):
When she down bad? I know my mom could have come,
but she was taking care of my grandmother and she
was in her last days, so you know, we had
to pick and shoot. But even in that sense, you know,
my mom is here taking care of me. I'm so
blessed and grateful that she could come from DC to California.
But shot, my mom don't know how to rest, so
(13:33):
she knows how to take care of me. Yeah, she's
doing a fantastic job. But it's it's it's interesting. And
you know I was telling Amber, you know why the
doctors tell you. You know, my doctor said, I'm doing
really good. I'm I was so happy when he called
and checked on me, because you know, you gotta poop
to get at the hospital. You gotta you gotta pass
(13:55):
that gas. I passed that gas. You know, you gotta
have your number two. And it's interesting. I will say this.
While I was in a hospital. You know, my mom
is a great advocate, and so I watched her a lot,
so I try to be a good advocate for myself.
And on my first night, after my first night, I
hadn't pouty yet and they were still trying to let
me out there. They were trying to They were like,
if you want to go home, you can go home.
(14:17):
They had already gave me one bag of blood. By
the next day, I needed two bags of blood. So
if I would have gone home, I would have never
got those two bags of blood that I needed, and
I would have been home. And it made me. It
made me think of some country star's wife just died
last week because she went home too soon after cosmetic surgery.
But it just all all the things that you're not
(14:37):
prepared for in that way, and then coming home and all.
Like I said, although I was doing well shit for
a day, I was busting out in tears. I didn't
notice this thing. I didn't know it affected me like this.
Like so I was happy to talk to Amber our
produced her because she kind of put it in a
different way. I hadn't thought about this holistically, you know
(14:58):
what I mean, in the sense of what Amber would
you say, having a removing a whole basket of fruit
out of my uterus, a whole basket of fruit from
your uterus. Yeah and yeah, and just to comment, you
guys say, you know so many other black women who've
had fibroids. The statistic is eighty percent of Black women
have fibroids some some form, whether they know it or not,
(15:19):
whether they know it or not, yeah, whether they're smaller
ones or bigger ones. So why should anybody care? Why
do they know it or not? And that's the part
that makes me mad, because I'm like, why it does
give near like a that's an epidemic. That is an epidemic.
It is an epidemic. And when you think about, like,
the way that I learned about fibroids and herbalism is
(15:40):
that there are bodies way of like trapping energy. Their
trauma is trapped and they may not all be from
you or from your experience. They can be from your
line generationally, right, But Yeah, there's so much energy that's
trapped in our wombs that we've carried generation to generation,
especially as Black women. When you think about what our
great great grandmothers went through, what women when they're doing slavery, um,
(16:03):
you know, and we've just had this huge disconnect from
our wombs and Like when Leah, when you said you
didn't even your doctor told me, you told you could
touch it, you could feel it, and you didn't want
touch it. That says so much to me, Like you
wouldn't even touch it, like, no, not touching that. No,
this is my and this is my first surgery. Yeah yeah,
and those are but these are things that you're holding
(16:24):
in your wombs and you're literally disconnecting yourself from it,
like you didn't want to touch it for ten years. Yeah,
and now I took Today was the day I took
the surgical tape off, and that was like a whole
moment in itself. And scared to get the C section
shelf when you ain't even had the baby yet. Oh God,
there's things we can do for that. We can talk
(16:44):
about that because I have had a C section as well.
But um, but even just back to that clearing up
your womb and then the emotions that you're talking about feeling.
Think about that you had twenty eight fibroids removed from you.
That's an immense clearing and immense clearing physically and spiritually,
(17:06):
Like imagine how your body feels. Just got to let
that go. I'm excited to get to that point because
right now I'm in the middle where you're just swollen.
So I'm excited to get to feel the light light partness. Yeah,
whenever they're happy. So can we talk quickly about that
four to six weeks of recovery and like and how
you're saying, like I don't I don't know how to recover.
(17:28):
I think that's also a systemic issue with black women
that we've carried because we weren't allowed to recover, right
and like how you said, like this just happened, You're
still swollen. Your womb is still swollen. So there's four
to six weeks of nourishment you need to give yourself
and that it may not necessarily mean sitting down all
day or arresting all day, which you should do a
lot more of that. But that's like, what are you
nourishing your body with? How are you helping your womb recover?
(17:51):
Are you replenishing that with good foods? Are you taking
herbs that are helping and you're healing. Are you listening
to your womb because you had been talking years and
you wouldn't touch her, so now that she's clear, how
are you communicating with her. How are you connecting with
her every day in these fords recovery? And that's and
that's tough work. I'm not I'm not saying that in
(18:12):
a lightweight either, because I know that that is tough,
deep work because I did it after a c section,
a really traumatic one where I almost died, and like
having to sit with my womb and having to sit
with that trauma afterwards, is that's deep work. But that's
part of your freedom as well. That's how we really
get free. That's how we don't get no more fibroids.
That's how we really let our wombs shine and connect
(18:32):
to that. Our womb is our seat of power as
a woman. Well, I guess some marangua girl. I'm about
the one around. I'll tell you about to run and
show throughout this right now, everything you get on the
(18:59):
very leaf on that nettles you talk about all the
blood that you lost. Just figure out the things you
need to do to renourish your body for what it
went through, what it's carried you through. And like, yes, Asia,
like we should all be running around screaming when our
sister gets our freedom, Like that's how we should feel,
That's how we should feel because you're making space. Yes,
(19:23):
I'm gonna circle back to something that you said about
the disconnect and not wanting to touch it and this
kind of disconnect from our bodies as Black women, this
kind of disconnect from the body. I just want to
sit with that for a second, because I think there's
something that tells us that our bodies are this thing
that's outside of us. When this was a thing that
(19:44):
we used to be like everything dictated. It's like you're
going to dictate the weather or knowing that body, you're
going to decide a number of things based on what
that body is doing and telling you whether you're going
to walk in that room, whether you're going to take
that bus, whether you're going to do whatever. It's like
your body is this thing that you're supposed to be
(20:05):
so in tune with, But I know we've learned to
kind of put our bodies to step outside of our
bodies and not really be connected to it. Even from
a sexual standpoint. The amount of women that don't even
know anything about their vagina or their uterus or the
different parts of their body. We've talked on the show
(20:25):
about pleasure and about our disconnect from how our body,
how to pleasure ourselves or have our partners pleasure us,
you know, all of the different things. There's so many
levels to this disconnect, this way that we are allowing
things to grow there and not pulling the weeds and
not paying and tending to ourselves. And it's like it goes,
(20:47):
it goes so much further. And now we're dealing with
this epidemic that's going on with black women and we
can no longer ignore it. But part of me feels
this that there's something about this generation of women that
is doing some work that is different from prior generations.
And so perhaps they are pushing these things out and
(21:11):
pushing them into a corner and they're becoming these masses
to a sense, were like, you know, you know how
something gets really bad because you're about to expel that joker,
you know what I'm saying, Like it's condensing itself so
that it can be expelled, you know, whereas that trauma
used to be spread throughout that I feel like we
as a generation are doing some different work because we're
(21:34):
speaking in ways our moms didn't or had the room too.
It's so crazy to me. I mean, I guess it's
not crazy. It is a patriarchal society that they spend
so much time on erectile dysfunction and so much money
on erectile dysfunction. I was in Miami not too long ago,
(21:56):
and we took the tour where you ride around on
the boat and you get to see all the rich
people's houses and stuff. And the guy who created viagra.
When I tell you the house was it was so massive.
They told us that the guy and his wife live
in this house alone. And you know, I've seen houses
(22:17):
with wings before, but it had it had more wings
than the bird need to fly. It was. It was
a lot. I mean, as he deserved. Even if people
failed the need. That wasn't I understand. But we're talking
about the continuance of humanity part still this this major
emi portion of a woman's body fertility, Yes, and that
(22:45):
is and the crazy thing about viagra, And don't get
me the line, but I want to say I did
read this or see a video about it, that viagra
itself was found by accident. When they were trying to
find they were trying they were testing out like some
sort of cancer like ja. They founded by accident, and
instead of continuing the cancer research Hello to save people's lives.
(23:07):
They shifted and started making the erection saving medicine like
it's in someone and accidentally finding cure for fibroids. You know,
come on, I'm just saying, you know, in a world
where we're you know, we're we're ridding ourselves a row
versus way because you know, we should be having more babies.
It's it's just, you know, it's fascinating that we have
(23:30):
this epidemic where it's killing Black women's fertility. It's like,
whose babies are we trying? Worried about whose fertility are
we really work? I think it's really interesting that Layah,
your mother and my mother had the same story that
in youth. Yeah, they told her mother that she'd never
have children and that she should get a hyster direct
(23:50):
to me. That's right, I remember. And they told your
mother to have a hysterirect to me before you were born,
just like before I was born. Oh yeah, I feel
like I feel this is damn near wart and you
really think about what's going on right now. As again,
man bro versus weight and can get you fucking I'm
(24:13):
just saying it could, it could fuck you up. A
hypocrisy of it is insane. Yeah. I did an interview
one time for Parents magazine about and someone called me
and said they wanted to talk about black women in infertility.
And I said, I don't know if y'all want to
call me, I'm probably not the right person to talk
to you talk to about this. And what was interesting
was she said, no, I do want to talk to
(24:34):
you about it. And we talked about my culture in
the way that we're all socialized to believe what black
women can and cannot do with their bodies. And you
said that this is killing black women's fertility, and yet
there is still an assumption throughout our society as that
puts black women as the as the forever fertile, She's
the woman that's having all the babies. And it's like
(24:57):
and that is and it leaves a conversation and away
from a section of our mean, a large portion of
black women that are not being addressed because they're being
completely erased. They're not even part of the conversation. It's
like they're they're acting like like this is not a
thing that is happening so close to the norm, that
(25:19):
this is some sort of fringe experience, and it's like
It is amazing to me that is still the culture
of this country, and even within the black community, we're
just not talking about it. And then when celebrities talk
about it, there's also this thing, oh, well, that person
is just they're successful, and so that's this thing that
happens to black women who are this or that, but
(25:41):
not the average black women. You talk about eighty percent,
eighty percent, eighty eighty percent. We'll be back after the break.
(26:06):
If you've noticed that your wife or your girlfriend, or
your sister, or your aunt, or your mother or your
friend is having a really heavy menstrual flow, excessively heavy,
if you're if you're and painful, if you're noticing these things,
if you're noticing that this is a youthful person but
(26:26):
they're having a hard time holding the water, you know
you have to please suggest them to see a guy
in ecologist somewhere. The challenging portion is that initially when
I moved to Tennessee, I'm just gonna speak on my
own experience. I'm searching around trying to find a guy
(26:46):
in ecologist, because that's what adult women do, you know,
we make sure to maintain our coucci. And I could
not find um, and I could not get an appointment
or a first time. You want the first time? I appointment? Honey,
six months, I couldn't get an appoint to me the
first time. Yeah, you gotta get in the system first,
you gotta get in. Yeah that's six six months from now,
(27:09):
six months months yeah, months, Like that's insane. It's interesting.
I was thinking when agians talking about the celebrity aspect,
because you know, usually you can match an issue with
a celebrity. This is not one of those issues. I
was thinking, the only time I've heard is being spoken
about on television, and I know y'all are like, yeah,
here you go. You're talking about Cynthia Bailey. Yeah, yes, yes, yes, yes,
(27:40):
because she had five words in the way that the
way that I remember Peter said some shit that really
fucked me up because he just made a comment about
how it was hard to have sex with her sometimes,
and I was like, the fuck And she went into
her five or situation and so wow, because sex is
(28:03):
an issue sometimes with five rights here and it was
noticeable because she was a model and right right, so
it's like clearly something is wrong. But you know, I like, yeah,
I never looked at you once and thought, oh, you
look four months pregnant. You never looked four months pregnant
(28:23):
to me ever, But I was like, all right, I
can look like this. What I was saying is that
this is more this is more recent. But the brat
was talking about this here recently, right, she's newly married.
She was talking about having a baby. And there was
(28:44):
Judy five boys, yes, that five boys being an issue
for her and I and it was circulating quite a
bit on the internet, I mean on social media. But
they were talking about that, and I said, wow, that's
probably one of the few times that I've seen the
celebrity also talk about fibroids. And it's you know, fitting
at this time period, because honestly, there is a little
(29:06):
bit more conversation going on about it than I remember
having in the past, but still not even close to enough.
And then also to like the study like studying black women.
I remember, as someone sent me an article years ago
about how black women are just not studied, like we
just there's not enough research about our bodies. So most
(29:30):
times even treatments and medicines and things like that are
not really catered towards any kind of study. That happened
that any extensive study that's happened around our bodies and
our lived experience. Just recently, they started to paint the
examples brown, all the examples of the uterus and the
(29:52):
baby in utero, and and all the they were never.
They were never brown people, never brown babies, never brown bodies. Never.
And I would it's interesting. I would like Amber to
talk about this because one of my random girlfriends hit
me up the other day. Again. We were like, what
you're doing recovering? She was like, oh, I had it too,
And then she sends me an article about well my
girlfriend had she had another girlfriend who had like I
(30:14):
don't know, fifty but she got rid of them naturally.
Now I said to her, I'm not going to read
this article right now because I just had a Maya mactimate.
And I don't mean I don't kind of regrets. Don't worry,
it will spell it for you in your phone. But
I do know this sugar and diet and things of
that nature. But my thing is it sounds like, if
(30:36):
you really want to get rid of five words naturally,
you just don't. You don't eat nothing that you want
to eat, and you live a life of strict discipline.
But yeah, Amber, can you speak on this whole natural
way of getting rid of these fire So I want
you got all the ut my approaches an RBS. I
believe there's a like a symbiotic relationship between Eastern and
Western medicine. I don't believe you have to be all
(30:57):
natural or you have to be all this. I think
that they can really work together, and I wish more
people had that attitude towards it, like they can work together.
You can have amiam to me, because maybe that's what
you needed, you know, Like I feel like if someone
has the level of fibroids that you have, trying to
clear that naturally would take a decade, you know what
I'm saying. So I believe, like you know, like I
(31:18):
don't think that you made the wrong choice at all
or you should have any regrets about your journey. It's
all about how you move from here, because now that
you've had this clearing, how are you now going to
nourish your body? There's no way to be perfect or
live talks and free anyways, So like that's not the answer.
Have the things that you want and moderation, you know,
take your herbs, take care of your body, being connected
with your body. I personally think that's the biggest piece,
(31:39):
Like are you connected and are you listening when something
is off so that you can adjust? You know, are
you are you in touch with your body? Are you
taking that four to six weeks to listen to her
and learn her talk to her? So I'm not bad.
I'm not bad for getting cut and not just cutting sugar,
because I mean, I do feel like if that is
a to do it, at some point, maybe I should listen.
(32:04):
I'm gonna tell you. I'm gonna tell you what I
used to tell people about, well about childbirths, but oh
I want to have natural childbirths or should I have?
I feel bad because I got drugs or this, that
and the other, and I'm like, listen, when that baby comes.
Nobody's gonna give you a metal honey. You're not gonna
get a star, You're not gonna get an award, you're
(32:25):
not gonna get a certificate for none of that. That's
why you have to make a decision that works for you.
If you had done it naturally, guess what guests who
would have showed up at your doorstep with with a trophy? Nobody? Okay,
you have to wake up in the morning and be
(32:46):
okay with your decision and how you listen to your
body and your experience. And I'm tired as we get
shamed for enough shit. Come on, can we just start
marking something thing off of this list of things that
we have to fucking be in order for everyone to
feel comfortable? Girl, please, I had to get over the
(33:08):
guilt of having a white male doctor for a second.
I was like, oh Lord, jesus cha, but he was
so good. He was great, a great surgeon. And yeah,
so yeah, you're right, Asia, We're working. I'm speaking for
all its folks listening. We're working through it. You write
no medals of being given here. I'm glad you brought
(33:30):
it up, though, because again, these are the things that
go on in our minds and we don't discuss them,
we don't say them publicly, and we just sit with that.
And it's more sitting, and it's more thinking, and it's
more mulling, and it's more things that are backing themselves
up in our emotions and our thoughts and our bodies,
and it's just we can't do this anymore to ourselves.
(33:50):
I saw something was it a might have been yesterday
where a young woman was talking about I think it
was like American horror story happening. I've watching too. I
love those two jail Yeah, I'm glad to see it. Um.
And the young woman on the show said that fear
(34:13):
wasn't our biggest enemy. It's shame. Oh yeah, I like it.
That thing hit different, thann't it? It hit different? So
like have the shame of having or choosing to as
a somebody that you know, maybe holistic, having surgery. Listen,
(34:34):
you know, that's that's about going into in itself and
listening to yourself for real. It's it's about making a
decision for real and in the quietest place for was
what benefits you the most? And um that's it, honey,
That's that's really the gist of it. You know. I like,
(34:54):
I'd like whatever said about having a doctor that is
both um or choosing you know, doctor that is both
holistic and you know, certified board h MD. I only
know of one. I'm sure there's others. Um. I definitely
invite all doctors that are INDs to get into some
(35:15):
holistic medicine as well and make that a part of
your practice. You have to do it. You know quietly,
but nonetheless. You know we're talking about doctor Frederick Burton,
yes on City Line Avenue, Philadelphia. Yeah, I think I've
heard of him. Okay, all right, all right. It's it's
a lot of blood tests, I'll say. And the tests
(35:36):
are not for when when someone takes your blood, typically
they're testing for what they're looking for. Only with a
holistic doctor, they're testing for everything everything, any any insufficiency,
any abnormality. Um, they're looking for that, you know, any
(35:59):
customers shouldn't. You can get to your doctor too about
that too. I forget, but there's a way to get
your labs and really have him go through everything. I
can't remember the terminology, you know. But yet you're right, Jill, Yeah,
I'm more than more than anything. Um, it's the kind
of general uptick and self awareness and that kind of
general uptick and just saying I want more out of
(36:22):
my interactions with my caregivers and stretching your village, you know,
expanding your village and things like that. I know, I
know that. It's just like, Okay, it's just more goddamn
black girl homework. I'm here for trying to get that
(36:46):
money for them. Man, I'm going to get that money
for the rent. But it feels good too. I wouldn't
want to be nothing else. No, no, And I gotta said,
but I could tell that it can get a little
heavy having the list of things that you have to
do to counteract the systems that are working against you.
So it's like, oh, well, I gotta do this, we
(37:07):
gotta do that. I gotta go to go therapy, I
gotta work out, I gotta take merbs, I gotta have this,
I gotta have that. But about in its twenty four
hours and a goddamn day, you still got to earn
a coin. Yeah, so I get I get it that
it's a lot, but it's it's it's a necessary thing
to get closer to a place of peace. Yeah, it's
(37:29):
it's the labor of finding peace. Right. It's still lighter
than what your mama and your grandmama went through. And
even though it feels heavier, sometimes it only feels heavier
because you have more resources and words. M hmmm. Yeah,
those resources and words are heavy, but you have them
and they didn't. So knowledge is power, and a burden
(37:52):
curls speaking. I'll run, y'all want me to run, y'all?
Say something. Did I say y'all around? I love you?
How about the whole of your holding to this table.
We're just trying to help, just trying to help. Who
(38:15):
more real talk after the break. We need to be healthy.
We have we have this amazing gift of life. There's
so much to do with it. There's so much to see,
there's so much to taste, there's so many people to encounter,
(38:38):
people to love, people to learn from experiences, like, there's
so much to do. So, you know, we want you
and it takes a lot to manage all its dopeness. Yes,
you know what I'm saying. We want you to to
pay attention to your body, really really pay attention to it.
(38:59):
I'm I'm guilty. So just don't please don't listen to
this like, oh, you know she's doing everything she can.
I feeling fuck up. Okay, I'm trying to get some
probiotics right into the smoothie or something. Put the key
(39:21):
for the key, forer key for her whatever the stuff
it tastes like vinegar. I can't do that with the
bottom with the balls at the but she talking about apples,
apple cider, vinegar, chia. I can't do that. Listen. You
can do all of it if you if you got
(39:41):
if your smoothie game is right, son, and you know
how to layer that john up. If you put the
chia in there, when you put the first layer of juice,
that ship will disappear and you never know it's in there.
Come on, man, I've come on. I okay, I said it.
I don't bit No, I don't like smoothes. No, I don't.
(40:02):
I don't like salmon. I'm not eating. I can't. I
can't put nothing nothing. I can't do it. But I
bet but I bet a bitch eat a salmon cake.
But I bet a bitch eat a salmon cake. I
eat my my mother's. That's the only salmon cake I'll eat.
I'll eat my mother's. But I said, how you get
(40:24):
your old megas? If you have the oils you want,
you you drink the oil. Trees have no choice. Okay,
are you making me sweat? I need you to drink
the oils, and I need you to. I mean, I
like smoothies, but they're not a part of my daily life.
I don't. I mean I don't like y'all. Y'all got
a vita mix like a vitam, they'd be pushing those
at the costco hard. I'd rather juice, and that's that's
(40:49):
a lot of work too. But a lot of work,
don't y'all know? Can't it? Just? Can't we just okay?
So part of our reparations, can I just get a
white lady to come over here and make the stuff
for me? Please? John? But juice? You got a smoothie
place or something? I don't know what I mean my
own personal white ladies who say white ladies make the
best smoothies. Oh my god, y'all, I didn't say they
(41:11):
make the best movie. See that you said something I
ain't say. I just want to use a label I
don't want. I'm not using, okays, See, but you're trying
to reverse this. I don't feel like making the smoothie
and cleaning the juice, so I am. I am about
to ask no black woman. Cannot y'all just stop the
world with this announcement? I cannot believe that Agia and
Jail y'all both don't work with the smoothes. Y'all are
like that. I didn't say it for the movie out
(41:36):
part of my daily life is what I had said.
Oh we gotta do something. We gotta do something. How
are you gonna get there? Because you know you ain't
gonna just take the sea mass in your mouth. You
know you gotta put it. Sometimes you gotta push it
in the smoothie that you don't want to take. That's
what different, No, that's what we different. I will take
a spoonful of sea mass. Quit easy like that, soak
mine and blended, and I'll take a See I like
(41:58):
to be done with my stuff. I just like hold
my nose and take it. And and now yes that
doesn't bother me. And also too, like I said, they
also make the flavor sea moss. Now yea from a
good company. Ye want to be all sugary y r right,
But now they have those, you put them in the freezer,
(42:19):
then you take them out, just scoop put a little
spooning and scoop it out. You're right, You're right, gulitely
want to celebrate what a good company for sea moss
is my I do the sea moss gel and I
love it because every time it could be my imagination,
but every time I take it, I swear in every time.
(42:41):
And now what kind of seams are you? Like? Just
a regular. It's like a seams gel. Like I feel
like the sea moss thing is definitely like one of
the gifts of the pandemic, because definitely sea moss became
like a household names in twenty twenty. Yeah, I was like, y'all,
(43:03):
I said, I was like, ain't nobody even talk about
this shit? But I was loving it. Black folks will
see mossing it up and listen, it's Africa because it's
not the Irish sea moss, right, Maybe it's the African right,
just because sometimes I don't know, don't it come out
the ocean. Irish is not where it's where it's from.
(43:26):
You can get Irish sea moss and Jamaica. Just I'm
gonna just say that. It's just what it's called. What
the plants called. Thank you. Listen, somebody out the amber
was like, y'all are here being dumb. Let me get
in here and hit us because they are here being dumb.
Let's stop. Thank you a real black if you take
(43:53):
that Irish buffalo wings, that's not buffalo that right. I'm
just cut the shame. Cut the shame, cut the shame.
You've already discussed this best that is that is the
gist of it all, try your best, and like we've
(44:16):
been saying over and over and over again them to
say again, pay attention to your body. Just pay attention.
I don't listen. Look, look, blessen you smell what's going
on with you before anybody else. Yeah, okay, it's good,
before anybody else. There's literally no reason for somebody else
(44:39):
to tell you about you. But in the words of
the great Jennifer Lewis, come on, if you're sitting shit
long enough, it stops stinking. Oh oh yeah, that's true.
I can't. I can't say that about like, uh, like cats,
people have cats, So the cats the place blind? Yeah,
(45:05):
have the place been like oh, but that's the thing.
That is the I'm telling you, that's the thing. So
listen to your body so you don't go numb to it. Yeah,
oh oh, you know you don't. You don't go deaf
to knowledge like this. I didn't even say that. I
(45:28):
was just building off of missus Lewis. Yes, okay, and
we like, I congratulations to her who she just got
her stall. Yeah, she got kick, she got five boys.
I gotta see things that I wonder now every time
(45:50):
I see a black woman. Oh, no, I'm not. It's
ain't putting that on her. I'm saying when I think
about black single black women. But never mind, y'all know
what I'm about to say, that's gonna be. You're like,
I wonder if that has anything to do yea one
when you find a couple of weeks ago when I
went to see my lady, well that's what. They still
(46:12):
have a small, one, small fibroid in there. And she
was like, it's nothing to worry about right now. And
I was like, okay, you said right now, it's gonna
be something to worry about later. No, you know why
because they tell us that as you approached menopause, they shrink.
So it's like, but there is this small gap if
you're still a fertile myrtle that if they rid of it,
(46:33):
you know you well, no, either way, you probably fertile.
But yeah, a menopause, they start to shrink. Because they
do come back. Some people will get I've known plenty
of women who've gotten fibrates removed at an earlier age.
They come back, they have to get them removed again.
But that really is what Amber was talking about, Like,
has your conversation with yourself change has what you're feeding
(46:54):
yourself change, feeding your mental and your feel like, what
are the conversations you're having with your body? What are
the conversations you're having with yourself? I mean, just all
of these things that rest and recuperation and reprogramming and
resetting and and really figuring out what am I going
to do with this freedom? What am I going to
(47:14):
do with this lightness, this weight that I've allowed to
go away? What do I do to not welcome it back?
I mean, that's part of it too. And if we
haven't been thinking about it. First of all, we ain't
been talking about this, so we most certainly probably as
it has as a community, been talking about the aftermath
of it all. So you know, there's the treatments, there's
the there's the medical treatments, but then there's what is
(47:35):
the life? What is the life you want to live afterwards?
Because like she said, this could be generational. You want
you don't want to give these habits and these ways
of thinking to the next generation of girls and women.
I need like a guide on tape, something, Yeah, tell
me I love. I need that I need for the
next few weeks, some affirmation. I need an app for this,
(47:56):
that's what I'm saying. Oh, baby, I need put it
out there the atmosphere. Hey, ladies out there that had
all the tech girls like, come up with an ask
rest and recovery. Oh, I can't do it too hard
as hard as you. I can't gonna hurt myself. But
I want to do it that hard to Yeah, I know,
she said, soon do herself. What is happening? That is
(48:30):
so good? Baby, one of our babies, one of our nieces.
This is a nephew. Come on, nieces and nephew, y'all
come on, come on, y'all listening exactly what's it called?
Come again? What's it called rest and recovery? As okay, ya,
Auntie's gonna need about ten percent of the deal that
you maybe just maybe five. We'll talk about it. Maybe
(48:55):
give them capitalists society and I need my reparations. I'm
joking only just the only problem is that, you know,
an idea is not something that can be copywritten. I know,
just just give Mama has a day job. Look, Auntie
has a day job. He has an idea, So you
(49:16):
can take that one for free. I got another one
day to come right down. Thing. That's fine. Yeah, you go,
I got another one. Just give us the hook up
so that we know how to do it, that we
know how to rest and explain it properly. Yeah, I'll
take a music, I'll take the chimes, I'll take the herbs.
I'll take it. Let's go. Oh, give it all the
(49:38):
tips for the hat. Okay, okay, okay. Oh give us
what you got, give it to us. I love. Yeah, listen,
this is mutual aid. Hell, I haven't heard that in
a long time. We're working together to figure it out.
We are, y'all. This is a dire though. It's it's gotten,
it's it's it's real serious, m it is. It is
(50:01):
your mom, and it is your aunts and your your
sisters and your girlfriends, and you and your daughter, and
you and me and my babies. Yeah, yeah, the shit
I sweet. Yet another thing to unpack. Uh uh. Put
in the laundry and put in a dryer or hang
(50:24):
it outside. Either way, it must be done. We thank
you so so so so much for listening to Jay
dot Il the podcast. We look forward to sharing information
with you, and we look forward to to learning more
about ourselves as we grow. You are loved, You are
(50:45):
abundant and God damn it, you are worthy. Thank you
so much. Chafts period, How do you eat an elephant? One? By?
(51:06):
It time? Hey, listeners, it's Amber the producer here. Just
another reminder that everyone's body is unique and what may
work for one woman may not work for another. So
if you're suffering from fibroids, work with your medical team
to determine the best course of action for yourself. Leiah
mentioned Vice President Kamala Harris's task voice for fibroids. The
(51:30):
VP did introduce the Uterine Fibroid Research and Education Act
into Congress in twenty twenty. For more information on the act,
I'll drop a link in the show notes. Hi. If
(51:55):
you have comments on something you said in this episode,
call eight six six. Hey Joe, if you want to
add to this conversation, that's eight six six four three
nine five four five five. Don't forget to tell us
your name and the episode you're referring to. You might
just hear your message on a future episode. Thank you
(52:15):
for listening to Jill Scott Presents Jay dot l. The
podcast Ja dot Ill is a production of iHeartRadio. For
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or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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