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September 16, 2025 17 mins

We're all DREADING going to the big destination wedding. PLUS: Leave North West alone and Imposter Syndrome

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Speaker 1 (00:12):
Oh, it's time to talk about weddings. So some on
this weekend was just like, I have to go to
this wedding in this place, and then another person had
this other big event in the other place, and then
someone else had a big birthday party on a Sunday night,
like a big elaborate birthday party at a private club,
and every one of these people.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Was dreading it. Okay.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
So it was three different types of events. One was
like a sweet sixteen, one was like a birthday party,
one was a wedding.

Speaker 2 (00:35):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (00:35):
These were all high end, expensive items, okay. So I'm
saying this to the younger generation, Okay. In each case
they were probably like easily six figure events, okay, and
in each case the people were dreading, going dreading. So
I have another friend who's talking about the wedding for
her kid, and I'm like, okay, well, I'll give you

(00:57):
some grammarules about when it should be when it shouldn't
be sex, and she doesn't want to deal with it.
She doesn't want to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars. Like,
for context, you could take a yacht with like probably
twelve to fifteen people on like a major like you're
a celebrity yacht for six figures, like let's say one
hundred hundred and fifty thousand dollars with a crew, and

(01:18):
you could do it properly, okay, for a meaningful trip.
You could also have a gorgeous house or a down
payment on a house right or buy a bunch of
amazing stocks that are going to go up. Or you
could burn three times four times that in some cases
and have everyone going dread it, dread it and then
complain about what the food was like, compare it to

(01:40):
something else, talk about the flowers were like, like the
way that I don't think that everybody should go to college.
I also don't think that everybody should have a very expensive,
elaborate engagement party, wedding, the botmets for all these things.
I'm just telling you people don't want to fucking go.
So if you're doing it for yourself, do it for
yourself and have the rest the people be like either

(02:01):
on zoom or streaming or AI because the people don't
want to go. I'm just shooting straight with you.

Speaker 2 (02:07):
Do the math.

Speaker 1 (02:08):
Think about how many people you talk about on a
weekly basis going on to a wedding, to a destination, wedding,
to a thing, to an inopportune night. It's a holiday weekend,
it's the summer, it's New Year's Eve, it's Christmas weekend, whatever,
and they don't want to fucking go. I'm just saying,
and I who will have a birthday party? I am

(02:28):
like the Queen of no obligation. I genuinely don't care
if you don't come. Don't want you to come, if
you don't want to come. I only want you to
come if you're jacked up and excited. And everybody knows
that about me. I may not come to your thing.
Why because I don't place all the importance in the
world on that.

Speaker 2 (02:47):
I just don't.

Speaker 1 (02:48):
If you didn't come to mine, you didn't invite me
to yours, and I invite you to mine, it doesn't matter.

Speaker 2 (02:53):
I don't care.

Speaker 1 (02:54):
I'm inviting who I want because of my own reasons
and who I want to be somewhere, and you should
do the same. And I I go to something because
of my own reasons and I want to be somewhere,
you should do the same too. I don't want bad
energy where it's obligation, someone's driting being there.

Speaker 2 (03:07):
I don't want to feel like that.

Speaker 1 (03:09):
You know that face you see someone make when they're
there just for obligating, Hey, how are you? They want
to get the credit for the kiss, They want to
give you the gift. I want to get the fuck
out of there. I don't want that energy. I want
you to be and I want you to stay so
late that you're embarrassing yourself.

Speaker 2 (03:25):
I got a lot of engagement.

Speaker 1 (03:29):
I guess we're gonna say for discussing Northwest and people
criticizing Kim as a parent because of her style, I
don't believe in that.

Speaker 2 (03:37):
I've said.

Speaker 1 (03:38):
I don't like when they did it with Blue Ivy,
I don't like when they did it with my kid.
I don't like what they do with housewives kids. It's like,
she's a child, doesn't matter what package in, doesn't matter.
That she dresses older, doesn't matter. But could matter that
she has a finger piercing. Someone on social media showed
me my daughter showed me. I was like, wait, that
is painful. That was the only thing that made me

(03:58):
really think if it's true, unless that's a I don't
know what's real anymore. But that was like, WHOA, She's
Kanye West's daughter, and I kind of went through, just
like the rattling of like two Kim's parents are like
Kim's mother was married to Robert Kardashian like working on
the Oj Simpson murder trial. Her mother was then married
to a man named Bruce Jenner, who later transitioned into

(04:19):
a woman. So the Kardashians their stepfather is now their
step mother Caitlyn Jenner. I mean the children. The sister
Kendall's like the biggest fashion model on the globe. Kylie
is a billionaire and has her own plane and did
like and when she still didn't have a two in
front of her age, I don't think she might have
still been nineteen. Maybe she was in her twenties, young mom.

(04:40):
Like they all roll and beat to a different drama. Okay,
Like it's not they don't live on earth. They have
like metallic silver cars and then like cashmere suede cars
like dusted in sparkles. Like they don't live a real
normal life. So I don't know why anyone would expect
their children to dress in a ill normal way. You cannot,

(05:01):
like ask a dog to be a cat. You cannot
ask someone so extraordinary who lives such an outrageous life
to be living a normal life, like are they supposed
to be going to Walmart or TJ Max to get
their clothes? Like I just don't expect Kanye West, who'd
started his own fucking church on Sundays like where he'd
have performances in Calabasas, who like went off the deep

(05:24):
end and had a wife who went naked to a
premiere who like was a billionaire on paper from Adidas
and Skims and then went to like zero for like
being anti Semitic, Like none of this is normal. I
don't know why we would expect any children to be
dressing quote unquote, there's no such a thing as normal,
but like doing anything that there's some common average construct

(05:48):
you're assigning them to, Like I don't even understand it.
If I was seven foot six, you wouldn't expect me
to like go on normal planes, Like you wouldn't expect
me to eat normal food. You wouldn't expect me to
do normal things like and again I hate the word normal,
but just like predictable, average, middle of the road construct

(06:09):
things like I think Northwest happens to be mature, like
looking her body happens to be mature, And when a
kid's body is mature early that informs how they act
and dressed. But when your mother is Kim Kardashian, your
father is Kanye West, your aunt is Kylie Kendall Chloe
and Courtney, and uncle is Scott did like great aunt,

(06:31):
I mean like grandparents and step grandparents are Caitlyn Jenner
formally known as Bruce Jenner, and like Christian, I don't
even know how to make like heads or toes of it,
do you.

Speaker 2 (06:42):
It's not even normal. It's totally rare air.

Speaker 1 (06:45):
Their private plans should not be called like Kim air
and like Kylie air.

Speaker 2 (06:49):
Should be called rare air.

Speaker 1 (06:51):
So get off criticizing Northwest for wearing a course that
you don't even see like beyond. I just want to

(07:14):
say something. Successful people not just celebrities. Successful people, entrepreneurs, moguls,
people that are really successful that have made it on
their own, but they're not heirs. They haven't been handed
down a fortune. I mean self made people. Yes that
includes celebrities. Yes, that includes like a Mark Cuban, It
includes a Jennifer Lopez, It includes a Kim Kardashian, It

(07:35):
includes a Tom Cruise, It includes a Bethany Frankel. It
includes Obama, doesn't matter whether you like them or dislike them,
doesn't matter who they voted for, it doesn't matter what
their religion is. That is not what I'm saying. They
usually deserve their success because from what I have seen personally,
the person who's at the helm usually is the one

(08:00):
who's making it rain. Unless there's somebody who's just so
lucky that they have such a gift, or someone else
put in place around them, people so much smarter than them,
which does happen in politics, then there's an exception. But
you know the difference between people themselves who are getting up,
showing up on time, doing the work. They're more creative

(08:21):
than the people around them. They're smarter than the people
around them. And when you see people around you that
are not as smart, or not as creative, or just
you're the one who has to make it rain.

Speaker 2 (08:31):
You're the one who has to do it. Like you
know what I mean. If you want to get something done,
do it yourself. If that is.

Speaker 1 (08:36):
You, you deserve it, and you should almost be glad
because if it was easy, everyone would do it, If
everybody could be as smart as Mark Cuban or Jeff
Bezos or Emma Greed, then they would. So the people
deserve their flowers, whether you like them or not. Let's
talk about Jennifer Lopez traveling around the world, going to Dubai,

(08:58):
doing the hair, the makeup, outfit, the looks, the snatch,
the songs, the dance is the acting, Lady Gaga, animal machine.
Successful people, truly, madly, deeply successful people. Not a person
that had one show and made a lot of money
on it because they were on ten seasons. They got lucky,
they did their work, and then the rest of their

(09:19):
life they're making money on it. Yes, they deserve it
because they did that work while on that show, or
they were just so hot or so charismatic they got
away with murder. But by and large, sustainable success and
longevity and paychecks, they deserve their fucking flat Miley Cyrus deserves, deserves, deserves,

(09:40):
David Beckham deserves. People get so mad at Taylor Swift,
like people love her, but then other people mad her.
She infantalizes whatever, she's manipulating her audience. She acts like
a little baby, a damsel in distress, a fawn, whatever,
and like that she's talked about. She's given the bread
crumbs or the easter eggs about her ex and like

(10:00):
gone through her heartbreak and utilized and exploited her heartbreak
to the tune of billions of dollars.

Speaker 2 (10:07):
Guess what.

Speaker 1 (10:09):
The people who maybe can't afford a therapist and buy
her song, who were broken up with, who have had
their hearts broken into, who have not found love, who
want the fairytale, want the fantasy. They're getting something out
of it, Like there's an ROI. It is an absolute ROI.
Like people are like, she got me through my childhood

(10:30):
or my adolescence or my breakup.

Speaker 2 (10:32):
They're invested.

Speaker 1 (10:34):
Everything is about ROI, Like you can't get mad at
her for being a successful businesswoman and yet also at
the same time exploiting what she's gone through. Two things
can be true. At the same time, the audience could
have helped her with it. Let's pretend she only was
exploiting her audience. I don't believe that to be true,
but let's pretend that that was the case. They're getting

(10:55):
something out of it, like it's a relationship. It's a
relationship supply and demand. She's selling something, they're buying it,
and they're satisfied with their purchase. They come back and
want to buy it again. No one did anything wrong.
They're the fairy tale, they're the royal family. Now people
are getting an ROI. You know, no different than anything else.

(11:17):
You go to a movie, you watch it. Did you
enjoy the movie when you left? Then it was worth
a ticket. Doesn't matter. It doesn't matter how much money
the person on screen made. If you got what you needed,
you don't feel cheated because people always like to count
other people's money.

Speaker 2 (11:32):
Always.

Speaker 1 (11:33):
People hate when somebody else makes a lot of money,
and like, look how much they're charging. Like, oh, Louis Utan,
Louis Utah charge one hundred and fifty dollars for an
eyeshadow and a beautiful packaging and the lip et cetera.

Speaker 2 (11:45):
It's air.

Speaker 1 (11:45):
Winn charge twenty dollars for a strawberry, Arimez charges sixty
five thousand dollars for a bag, and Sotheby's charges half
a million dollars for that same said Himalayan bag. Encrust
it in diamonds. If there's a market and someone's paying it,
what's the problem. Kick him out of Louis Vutan. Now
people can push back. Chinell could charge all this money,

(12:06):
and then not be nice to their customers. Then the
customers willing to decide whether they got an ROI or not.
But it's what the market will bear. So people always
talk about impostor syndrome and that they feel like they're
an impostor. I feel like impostor syndrome is me thinking

(12:30):
that so many other people are impostors. Like I feel
that authenticity is something that is brought up almost too much,
like it's authentic, be authentic, She's authentic, genuine, all that right,
And it's just like this word that people say versus
it being real. And the problem with authenticity and accessing

(12:50):
it is that I don't think many people even really
are self aware.

Speaker 2 (12:55):
They don't even really know who they are.

Speaker 1 (12:58):
I'm thinking of one person in particular that I won't mention,
who's a public person who I believe doesn't really realize
how inauthentic they are.

Speaker 2 (13:06):
Everyone else does.

Speaker 1 (13:08):
But the problem is if someone themselves keeps trying to
reinvent who they are based on what they think society
wants them to be or what they think they should
present as you know, like people always say things about
themselves like I'm this kind of person or I'm that,
or I'm commitment phobic, or I'm very this, or I'm
very shy, or I'm very outgoing, or I'm very sexy

(13:30):
or all these things. In many cases, that's just what
someone's saying. It doesn't mean it's true. It doesn't mean
it's who they authentically are. And to be authentic you
have to really just have probably done the work or
just have a gift of the innate self awareness to
then have the freedom to just be yourself. And that's

(13:51):
why you won't have imposter syndrome, because you just are yourself,
whether you could do it or can't, whether you're flawed
or aren't, If you're honest in the experience, it really
doesn't matter. If someone has imposter syndrome, they are trying
to present something to the world that they don't actually
believe is true, or the world believes something about them,

(14:13):
or they've been given a job that they themselves don't
believe that they warn't so that's why they feel imposter syndrome.
And likely if they feel imposter syndrome, they are an impostor.
I don't feel imposter syndrome because I'm not an impostor.
Because if I don't know something, I say it. If
I'm experiencing something as it's happening that's challenging, I'll say it.

Speaker 2 (14:36):
I don't mean you're.

Speaker 1 (14:37):
Supposed to cry to your boss at work every time
you get jammed up. But if you're honest in the experience,
you'll never feel like an impostor. And I feel as
a result of that, that's why people that are just
saying the thing in the interview that they feel that
people want to hear, and you could just it's an
essence of inauthenticity. You could just it's like in your skin. Now.
Some people get away with it because their entire image

(15:01):
is perfection or glam or super intelligent. Like there's one
other person I'm thinking of one. The first person was
a woman. This person is a man that's constantly trying
to tell everybody how much they know. It's exhausting in
such an emphatic like yelling at you. Weigh why why
they yelling if it's so secure and they're so sure

(15:23):
and what they're saying, what is like, why are they
yelling at you so anyway, I think most other people
are imposters. I see it in dating all the time.
I see a man who has, you know, is wearing
a million dollars in watches, you know, over the course
of several days, but then doesn't offer to pay for
something very reasonable like in being chivalrous and being a gentleman. Now,

(15:47):
either those watches are fake or they're fake, because it's
just those two things don't track. It doesn't line up.
Or they presented on their dating app or in their
job description or their linked in as being the head
of this or the president of this or a partner
or VC. You see this a lot on some of
these boogie dating apps, like some big shiny object, which

(16:10):
is no different than filtering a picture.

Speaker 2 (16:12):
I'll give you an example.

Speaker 1 (16:13):
I'll see a guy that'll say that they're in real
estate development because they're a real estate broker. I'm sorry,
that's a scam. That's a scam, and you're an impostor.
So imposter syndrome happens all the time in dating, but
not with me. I walk into a date who I am?
It's because the other person is an impostor. We see
it all the time, the way someone wants to present themselves.

(16:35):
Anyone who says very involved dad, impostor why just your dad?
You need to say you're very involved aad. You're an impostor.
Anyone who shows themselves near a fancy car, or near
a plane, or wants to somehow exude rich in a
photo or a description, they're an impostor. They're an impostor

(16:56):
because they're insecure. They're not authentic. That's how they're presenting.
Takes a lot to be secure, but at least be
honest about being insecure. That would actually be more secure
than what most people are presenting.

Speaker 2 (17:10):
So imposter syndrome

Speaker 1 (17:11):
Is everywhere, but the call is not always coming from
withinside the house.
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Host

Bethenny Frankel

Bethenny Frankel

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