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November 6, 2024 17 mins

The election happened. It’s time to stop talking at each other and start listening. Authenticity and genuine connection means hearing one another out—even when it’s uncomfortable.

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:12):
Okay, let's talk about the election. Not an easy thing
to talk about. I have said that both sides have
done things that I didn't like. I've gotten killed on
both sides. I've lost followers on both sides. I cannot
be a chicken salad lipstick swilling woman alone. And it
would be easier and I would make more money and
I would gain more followers if I stuck to chicken
salad and chanel. But the truth is, I have to

(00:35):
be a grown ass woman, a mother, a friend, a partner,
a business person, an entrepreneur. I have to speak my mind.
I'm smart. I've been on Shark Tank with Kevin O'Leary
and Mark Cuban on two different sides of the election.
I've held my own and texted them privately. I've held
my own. I've been right with them. I'm sure i've
been wrong with them. But I'm a grown ass woman

(00:56):
who is just as smart as anyone else, and I'm
allowed to have an opinion. The thing is, we've gotten
to this elitist state where people are snobs. People act
like because they went to a better college, because they're richer,
because they had a better job, that they are the
authorities on the election. They're gonna talk louder, they're gonna
browbeat you, they're gonna abuse you, they're gonna fight you

(01:17):
in the comments. They're gonna fight with each other in
the comments. And they think that that's gonna make them win.
And this was the most divisive election in history. It
got ugly, It went to almost fisticuffs. It was just
really unbelievably vile in just the tactics and people beating

(01:40):
the shit out of each other. Everyone was so afraid
everyone needed their side to win so badly that they
would just abuse other people that disagreed. Here's the problem
with the divisiveness. There is no way to have a
healthy conversation. There is no way to talk to someone
else about your beliefs if you browbeat them, verbally abuse them,
attack them and jam your opinion down their throat, or

(02:02):
refuse to sit at a Thanksgiving table with them. Do
you know how many rich Hollywood celebrities or members of
the entertainment community and archaic bedrock community by the way,
in LA that I have heard say I want sit
down to dinner with him because of his politics. Are
you a fucking idiot? I'm friends of Mark Cuban, I'm
friends of Tim Dillon. I would easily go on Joe Rogan,

(02:24):
and I would go on Alex Cooper, Carl her Daddy,
I would go on the View, and I go on
Fox News. I have worked in philanthropy, and incidentally, Republicans
just happened to give more money than Democrats. Democrats talk more,
Republicans give more. I don't know why, but I would
go on CNN and I would go on Fox because
I want money from both sides, and I will help

(02:45):
people from both sides because humans are humans. And I
use the analogy of a relationship. So you're in a relationship.
You have a partner, you have a husband, you have
a wife. You're in a relationship. You disagree on something,
and it could be spending, it could be parenting, it
could be religion, it could be upbringing, it could be
where you're going in the holidays. Whatever. You attack the

(03:07):
other person verbally, you tell them why you're they're an idiot,
you're right, they're wrong. Are they going to listen to you?
Will they hear your message? Or you can have a rational,
healthy conversation with them about why you feel the way
that you feel. In therapy. They teach you to talk
about your own feelings. So like, I as a woman,

(03:29):
feel this way about my body, I as a trans
person feel this way. I as a poor person who
can't afford to feed my kids, feel this way. I
as a person from Ukraine, I as a person from Russia,
I as a person from Gaza, I as a person
from Israel feel this way. Versus you are a fucking idiot.
You do this, you do that, You're blamed, You're wrong.

(03:51):
You can't hear someone attacking you. You can't hear. There's
no way to prove a point by verbally it attacking
someone else by fighting with them in the comments. And
I don't know why people are so stupid, Like talk
to you're a Democrat, talk to a Republican, But can
we have a healthy conversation. Can I tell you why

(04:12):
I'm scared as a woman who was raped in high school,
who had an abortion in high school, who's broke, who's
a nurse working three jobs, Like why can't or you're
a Republican, you're talking to a Democrat. It makes me.
This makes me uncomfortable. This about sports with my daughter,
who's an athlete, who's a female or this about my

(04:33):
daughter who's in a in a camp bunk. A person
with a penis comes in there, Like it's a conversation.
It doesn't have to be a zero sum game where
you're a fucking idiot, you're wrong, I'm right. I had

(04:57):
a guy, doctor Amador, this therapist, a relateationship therapist, and
his book was called I'm right, you're wrong, Now what.
It will murder your relationship for it to be a
zero sum game. I'm right, you're wrong, now what? And
that's how politics has been. I'm right, you're wrong. Celebrities,
the most sanctimonious group, have acted like they're the authority.

(05:21):
They're right. They take a picture with Kamala, so therefore
she's gonna win. They go speak at the Trump rally,
so therefore he's gonna win. Nobody gives a shit about celebrities,
Like why do people Hollywood is a dead town? Now? Why?
Because social media is king, because citizens journalism is king,
because cable is a dinosaur, because my former network is

(05:47):
like being in Bedrock with Fred Flintstone trying to start
the car with his feet, Like it doesn't it. There's
three hundred thousand people watching these shows like it's not
it's not it anymore. It's not it to like do
something for six months and then later edit it down,
like that's not what's going on. It's twenty twenty four, baby,
you have fucking opinion, Get on your guys damn phone
and share it. And celebrity La real estate's getting fucking killed.

(06:12):
People are moving out of there. Everyone says it's dead
from like because the entertainment industry is dead, so celebrities
are not relevant. Celebrities are getting canceled that we're like
the biggest A List celebrities ever, celebrities that have hundreds
of millions of followers coming to me to work together,
to ask my advice. Why I don't know the world's

(06:32):
catching up with just saying what you fucking feel, but
in a way that's digestible. I've said things that are wrong.
I've said things in the wrong way. You could say
one thing two different ways. I'm learning because if I
say something the wrong way, you know what I'm gonna admit.
The reason I owe Megan Marko on apology is because
I said something the wrong way. I said crimey a

(06:55):
river invalidating her experience. The day before she was going
to talk to Oprah about being suicidal and talking about
her experience with racism in the Royal Palace. Now, did
I feel inside crime a River? Yes? Could I have
said it in a different way, one hundred percent. Would

(07:16):
the message have been received in a better way. Would
I maybe have had a conversation with her in a
different way. Possibly. I've said things about the Kardashians. I've
said things, but during this election I said things appropriately
about Trump, and Kamala still got killed because people can't
have a healthy conversation. So people have to be able

(07:37):
to have a healthy conversation. If you're in a relationship
and you're going to tell your husband that you're not
feeling seen, that you're not feeling sexy, or you're telling
your wife that you feel like she's spending too much
money or like you're not having enough sex, or you
don't like the parenting style, or you want to go
on a ski vacation versus a sunny vacation, or you
are worried about the war in Ukraine, like whatever it is.

(08:00):
If you talk at someone, they can't hear you. If
you talk to someone, they can talk to you. And
the divisive era has to end. I considered a dinner table.
I could marry someone who voted for someone that I
didn't vote for. Why. I want to know why they
feel how they feel. I want to hear what they
have to say. They may have grown up in a

(08:21):
different way. They may have grown up rich. They're not
wrong because they grew up rich. They're not a bad
person because they grew up rich. They may have grown
up poor. Let me give you an example. I don't
have a big tolerance for coddled, spoiled, entitled kids that
like the parents like I just am feeling bad. They're
going through something because they're very stressed out, because they

(08:42):
have homework and lacrosse practice. I come from a different perspective.
I come from the tough shit program of parenting. I
come from the Drew Barrymore school of childhood. I come
from abuse, drugs, alcohol, the racetrack, gambling, debauchery, night clubs.
I come from that. So it's hard for me to

(09:02):
understand someone else who comes from a coddled cul de sac.
But it doesn't mean that their experience is invalidated, like
they're a bad person because their parents didn't abuse them
and let them get sexually abused by people on the racetrack.
That doesn't mean they're wrong. You have to be able
to have a conversation. You could be a person who
grew up Puerto Rican and you're in a relationship with

(09:22):
an Italian American or someone Irish. You grew up in
different houses, you were taught different things. Why can't you
have a conversation about that. You grew up Orthodox Jewish.
Your partner is a devout Christian. You gotta be able
to talk about this stuff. Why why does it resonate
with you? What do you disagree with about your childhood,
about the way you were raised? Like? Why can't what's

(09:42):
wrong with everybody? This is what couple's therapy is about.
This is why people. This is what like the un
is about. This is what boards are on big successful company.
You have a board of directors, you have a chairman
of the board, and you have all these other people
from different backgrounds. You might need a woman. You might
want a black woman. You might want want a male
who's worked in tech. You might want someone who worked

(10:05):
in politics. Why. Because it's like a summit. You want
to hear other people's thoughts. That's what the Allen conferences.
That's what business summits are. It's frankly why corporations have
like national sales conferences. Let's hash it out, let's talk
about it. And this guy that that I date, you know,
says it's called raw raw shit, the raw rush. It
is when you get everyone together and you understand them.

(10:27):
I have several people that work with me that are Albanian.
For example, I connect with Albanians. I don't know why.
I just I love Albanians. Okay, so I'm like, let's
do our Christmas dinner at or a holiday dinner at
an Albanian restaurant, because I want to like understand their culture. Why.
You know, there's something about Albanians that I connect to.
I think it's their work ethic. They're like sort of

(10:49):
not sensitive. This is also completely like making a blanket statement.
But from my experience, Albanians are a tough group male
and women. They have fixed They care about family. They
often live with their parents. They're into religion. They marry young.
A lot of the women are makeup artists and hairdressers.
Men love cars, they love bling, they love like luxury items.

(11:12):
They fucking work like a dog. They are hard workers
and they're not sensitive. Like, so, like I want to understand,
I want to go to there, I want to go
to an Albanian restaurant. I would like to go to Albania,
and like, I want to understand what makes an Albanian
person tick. So you got to learn to understand your partners,

(11:42):
your enemies, people that differ in political views, in religious views,
in socioeconomic views. You can't be on social media beating
the shit out of someone else because they grew up privileged.
That's how they grew up. You can't go back and
reverse time they grew up privileged any more than you
can get mad at somebody for being uneducated. It's like
nobody gets a double vote. Everybody gets one vote. The

(12:06):
country has spoken Donald Trump will be the next president
of the United States. Something happened where he lost, and
then the country said, this is what we want. We
don't want that, we want this. Why people were being
mansplained to, people were being talked down to. People. Celebrities
were saying they're moving. Let me run through a list

(12:29):
of celebrities they're moving. Amy Schumer moving out of the country,
George Lopez leaving, Chelsea Handler going, Brian Cranston Shares moving
to Jupiter. Unclear whether it's Florida or the other planet,
but Florida is very pro Trump, so I assume she's
gonna get on her spaceship and move to another planet
with her young boyfriend John Stewart, Samuel L. Jackson, Miley Cyrus,
Lena Dunham, Whoopy Goldberg, Raven Simone, Neo, Reverend Al Sharpton.

(12:52):
What does this mean, Robert de Niro, Like, they're not moving.
They pay taxes here, their kids go to school here,
They've made their money here. They have participated in and
relished in the American dream fueled by democracy, which means
the people have spoken, which means people got their chance
to vote. Everyone got up, they voted, they spoke. So

(13:16):
all these people who want to move out of the
country and won't, are you gonna believe them next time?
Are we gonna like care whose celebrities vote for? Do
we care that Hillary Clinton took a picture with Chris
Jenner several years ago? Do we care about jay Z
and Beyonce? Do we care? I mean any more than
a normal person. I care about Beyonce as a single
voting human. Taylor Swift, I care about her as a

(13:38):
single voting human. Taylor Swift is arguably the most famous
woman on the planet. Did it fucking matter when it
came to milk and gas and unemployment and the Ukraine
and Gaza and Israel and did it matter? It didn't matter.
Each celebrity gets one fucking vote. Go in that booth
and go for it. But you're not small, more elite,

(14:01):
more educated, more correct, more anything than anyone else. And
the world has had more than enough of celebrity sanctimonious.
The die has been cast. This is the president. The
country needs to come together. Mark Cuban dug his heels in,
Guess what. Congratulations Donald Trump? And Elon Musk Andy Cohen

(14:22):
despises Donald Trump. Guess what? Come together? Because everybody today
is like, holy shit, I went so fucking hard in
the paint and here we are. You know, Jennifer Lopez
crying on the stage. Carti B. They have Jennifer Lopez
has two hundred and seventy million followers. What does Cardi
B have? What does Taylor Swift have? Let's count the

(14:44):
social media followings of Taylor Swift, Cardi B, Beyonce, I'm
gonna do that today, jay Z, Chelsea Handler I'm gonna
have someone combine the social media followers of all these
people and we're gonna say that, and we're gonna realize
and everybody's ready for it. This is the age of authenticity.
This is the age of truth. This is the age

(15:04):
of unemployment, war, religious differences and coming together and Fox
and CNN fucking rolling their eyes on both sides. They're
better than last night looked like a funeral on CNN
and it looked like Marty Ron Fox, And if it
went the other way, it would have been the opposite.
That's bullshit too. Report the fucking news like when we
were kids. We don't need your eye roll, we don't

(15:27):
need your personal opinions, we don't need your snark because
you all look like a bunch of fucking losers. Now
that's how I feel like enough. The media has played
a part too in this bullshit. So twenty twenty four,
Donald Trump would be the president. Take it or leave it,
like it or not. This is what it is. So
if you said you were gonna move, I guess you
got to get the fuck out because that's what's happening

(15:48):
in this country. Or you have to say I misspoke.
That's it. You know, and I had so many different
opinions having nothing to do with who I was voting for. Literally,
Peico comment at the Trump rally was terrible. It was
in poor taste. It was degrading to Puerto Ricans. I
spoke on it, got crushed Kamala. I didn't think she

(16:09):
should do call her daddy. I didn't. I didn't think
you should be like, Hi, I want to be popular
and cool, like we want to hear what you want
to do with the world. And that's I spoke about it.
Fucking canceled, lost tens of thousands of followers on both sides.
I got killed twice. You help Gaza, you get killed,
You help Israel, you get killed, You help Ukraine, you
get killed, you help this one. You have like, it's unbelievable.

(16:31):
You're not allowed to just do something and I allowed
to say something. You're not allowed to have an opinion.
You're not allowed to think that someone at a Trump
rally saying something about Puerto Rico that didn't fucking land.
I know it was a joke. It was a bad joke,
didn't Land. Sorry, that's a problem. You're not allowed to
say you don't think that Kamala should be like cozying
up to celebrities. You know, allowed to say it, Well,
tough shit. I'll say whatever the fuck I want to

(16:52):
say because it's over. The dye has been cast, and
the age of divisiveness has come to a screeching halt.
You welcome
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Bethenny Frankel

Bethenny Frankel

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