December 18, 2025 • 29 mins
Host Jeremy Odem is BACK with a brand new episode of the award winning, chart topping, world wide sensation, Laugh with Me Podcast. This week, Jeremy REWINDS us back to 2023 when Santa Claus called into LWM! Hear from Father Christmas himself as he prepares for the holiday season.
In this episode:
-Is Johnny not in the holiday spirit?
-what Santa is up to the weeks leading up to Christmas
-popular gifts this year
-what is Santa looking for in your sleep?
-favorite places to visit on Christmas Eve
-has the naughty list every been wrong?
-Jeremy works out a couple new jokes on Santa
-"LWM Christmas" performed by the Pepper Spray Singers
AND SO MUCH MORE
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Snow falls down like a punchline joke. Jeremy, Oh it'
the mic, he spoke, Eric Larson Guest of.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
The Year, no doubt.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Johnny p in the booth, He's mixing it out. Santa's
got his slave, We've got our show, laughters, the gift,
Let the joy overflow. Laugh with me, Laugh with me,
Falla La la, Fun Stories and jokes till the night
(00:45):
is done. Thong song plays.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
While we sit there now, Oh Jy somewhere, but hey,
let's move along. Six Reindeer Racing, seven jokes deep, every
cracks upon.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Johnny's losing sleep. The mic is hot, the vibe so chill.
Jeremy is the captain of this laughter filled thrill. Candy
Canes and Punchline Swirl podcasts gold In the Christmas World, Pas,
the cookiees, the milk, the cheer.
Speaker 4 (01:22):
Let's toast to the laughs and a brighter new year.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Laugh with me, Laugh with me, La La la.
Speaker 5 (01:30):
Funs, Stories and jokes till the night is done.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Long song plays while we sip bed Not Ojy somewhere,
but hey, Let's move along. Candy Canes and Punchline Swirl
podcast Golden Christmas World.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
Past the Cookies, the milk, the cheer.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
Let's toast to the laugh sand a brighter.
Speaker 5 (01:58):
New year, A laugh with me, laugh at me, all
lota fun.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Stories and jokes till the night it is done.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Long song, please while we sit there, oh Jay somewhere,
but hey, let's move along, let's move along, but hey,
let's move along.
Speaker 4 (02:51):
Welcome back. It is a laugh with me, a podcast
with Jeremy Odom and I'm your home ja oh and
here and laugh with me.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
Boy.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
We are in the holiday spirits. Happy Honkah, Merry Christmas.
So much just feel good, exciting, up beat energy in
the air right now, except for little grinchy in some places,
(03:28):
by the way, not Johnny, it's not that it's not
that you're not in the Christmas spirit. It's just you
tend to just kind of stay the same. I mean,
you're as a guy, Johnny, you're kind of a grump
(03:50):
and a lot of people at the holiday times, you know,
the spirits get raised just a little bit, they get
a little more pep in their step, gives you some family,
some friends, maybe take some time off from work. And
uh my guy, you're I'm not saying you get grumpier,
(04:11):
but you're certainly not fitting the you know, I suppose
the holiday spirit and then no I'm not. I'm not
kidding around like you like seriously, let's let's feel the energy. Okay,
let's feel the energy around you. Go out, go to
some stores. That's what you need to do. That's what
the holiday season is about. Go out to some stores
(04:31):
and just absorb all that feel good that's going on
around there and then maybe get a little more pepping
your step. Buddy. But anyway, we we've got a good
one for you here today because we're gonna rewind you.
We are gonna rewind you. It was the end of
twenty twenty three. One of the biggest guests we've ever
(04:52):
had here on Laugh with Me It is the big
Guy himself, Chris Kringle. Santa Claus was on the show.
This was in the early days of the pod, like
real early days of the pot. So this is gonna
be a lot of fun. It was a good chat
with the big Man. We get to hear about what
exactly is he's doing as he watches a sleep you know,
(05:13):
you know famously Santa watches you in your sleep, So
we're gonna we're gonna ask him you know what's what
we did, ask him, what's the deal, what exactly it
is that you're looking for it? Just kind of see
what it is he does throughout the rest of the year. Uh,
he had a lot to say. So this was a
big get for us. Early on in the show. We're
(05:35):
bringing it back to you. It's the rewind laugh with
Me with special guests Santa Claw. Okay, right here is
the big guy. It is Santa Claus on laugh with me. Hello,
Holy Christmas, Santa Claus you're you're actually here, You're on
(05:58):
Laugh with Me.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
If you wouldn't talk over me. I don't know if
you heard, but I said, ho ho ho, I said,
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
Oh yeah, no I heard. I heard mer Christmas. You
do love to send that greeting out to the people.
But thanks for coming on the show and spending some
time with us.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
I would love nothing better than to spread my Christmas cheer.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
So you're it's almost Christmas Eve. We're just you know,
a couple of weeks away. Like, what are you up
to right now?
Speaker 2 (06:30):
You know, I've really gotten into spin classes here recently.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
Spin classes.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Yeah, I'm doing a lot of bike riding.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
Why why are you bike riding right now. It's the
busiest time of year for you.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
I mean, I don't do shit Hi gifts like, I
don't know how to do it.
Speaker 4 (06:50):
So you're just a delegator.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Yes. Have you not participated in Christmas cheer up to
this point in your life?
Speaker 5 (06:59):
No?
Speaker 4 (06:59):
I have.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
I guess you should know that I am the distributor.
I work on logistics.
Speaker 4 (07:05):
So you're wow, you're just strictly in logistics. Then, so Sannah,
So you're busy running spinning classes while your team is
creating all the gifts and gathering everything for the children
all across the world.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
Right right, right?
Speaker 4 (07:21):
When do you follow up? I mean again, I'm assuming
you're getting reports back from from the works.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Follow up? What's a competition? Who else you going to
go to?
Speaker 4 (07:35):
That's a good point. I will say you have had
a stronghold on Christmas for a long time. Amazon appears
to be gaining some steam.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Woa, whoa, whoa, whoa whoa Amazon?
Speaker 4 (07:50):
Yeah, Jeff Bezos, I have right.
Speaker 6 (07:53):
Now, Oh monopoly, I get a crouch on. So you're talking,
I'm not afraid of Amazon.
Speaker 4 (08:04):
So Amazon has nothing on Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
No, Amazon parents are buying their kids gifts on Amazon.
Maybe sure, sure, sure, But who are they saying the
gift is from.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
Yeah, that's a good point. It is it is from
Santa Claus. Yeah, that's solid point. People are at parents
all across the world are a Do you think it's
a little embarrassed, you know, to say it'd be from Amazon.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah. The game is the same now as it was
forty years ago. The game was the same now as
it was eighty years ago. Like, don't come at me,
don't come at me.
Speaker 4 (08:40):
So what are some of the popular gifts this year
that kids are asking for.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
Well, I think it's funny these kids, because I mean, honestly,
I get requests from everybody. I get requests from all
age groups. Wow, and you know what, you know what
most people want? What continence? They want to be able
to poop?
Speaker 4 (09:03):
You're saying everybody wants to poop. How exactly are they
asking you?
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Well, normally I prescribed caffeine.
Speaker 4 (09:11):
Oh oh, you're sending caffeine to the folks.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, you know, that'll normally get the job done. I mean,
if it doesn't, you know, maybe the next year they
might ask me something a little bit stronger.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
Yeah, I will say Santa I have have zero issues
in the pooping area. As you know, I have Crohn's disease.
Is it possible that this was a Christmas gift from
Old Saint Nick a few years back.
Speaker 7 (09:36):
No, no, No, In fact, exactly the opposite.
Speaker 4 (09:40):
Oh, thank you. Well, as we all know, Santa watches
you when you sleep. What's some of the oddest things
you've seen when watching people?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
What you know, it was really an evolution in watching people.
For a couple of years. When I was watching people,
what I really keyed in on was I loved the
arm filters. People that would just throw their arms across
that they would flat people in the face. You know,
just all the arguments that that would cause.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
Yeah, what do you mean, people slapping across the face?
What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (10:19):
You know what I mean? Don't don't. I've watched you sleep.
I've seen Ashley lay that left hand across the face.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
Well, you know what, you son of a bitch? I
thought you referring to the time I had a dream
where I was fighting Chuck Norris and I did actually
throw an arm over to the left side.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Oh oh, that's funny. Because of how you treat your audience,
the fact that you withhold information like that. I don't
do them.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
I don't withhold anything from anyone.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Well, and speaking of withholding, that was actually kind of
my second evolution is you know, after I tired of
the arm flailers, I really enjoyed the blanket stealers. You
know those people that would just kind of hog all
the blankets, They pull them all to their side, leave
the other person cold. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (11:14):
See, that's the thing. Folks who steal blankets. I call
them the poor people. Santa. I feel like you like
that joke.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
No, I'm offended by that joke. I'm offended by that
joke because the people that you call poor are the
same people that are asking me for gifts every year.
Speaker 4 (11:39):
That is true, Well, you're.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Asking me for that blanket because they know that that
blanket's going to get stolen. We touched on this idea
of like what do you watch for when you sleep?
And honestly, what I watch for when I sleep when
people are sleeping, well, when I'm sleeping, when everybody is sleeping,
what I watch for BedHead?
Speaker 4 (12:03):
You're watching for the BedHead?
Speaker 2 (12:05):
I love it. I love it. I honestly I'll get
like I love people that spend a lot of time
with their hair and then they kind of turn over
a little bit and the thing turns into a mohawk.
I love it when people who don't care about their
hair make up and the hair just looks perfect like
it was like on a TV show. Like I just
(12:27):
I want to see that because that is the randomness.
That's what I crave. I've seen every other kind of
sleeping that there could happen.
Speaker 4 (12:36):
You're telling me right now that your favorite part of
watching people when they sleep is seeing what happens to
their hair. Yeah, you're a sick freak, Sana. I just
want to say, you've got some like some weird cakes.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
I don't like. I guess I don't understand the fascination.
Like you guys know I'm here. You guys have known
I'm here since the beginning.
Speaker 4 (13:01):
We've got Chris Kringle here on laugh with me. What
are some of your favorite places to visit on Christmas Eve?
Speaker 2 (13:09):
I have a lot to do. I have a lot
to do. I very refined taste.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
Refined taste last for.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
The most basic things.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Candy canes and gum drops are your game. What do
you mean refined taste?
Speaker 2 (13:24):
I think compars because nothing is unique. Well, I like
every single place that I could go after Christmas, That's
where I want to go. Like, I don't want to
spend more time on Christmas, I don't want to spend
more time watching you guys. So I have stuff to do.
Speaker 4 (13:45):
What do you do? What do you do after delivering
gifts all over the world on Christmas Eve? What exactly
does Santa Claus do?
Speaker 2 (13:51):
You said? Right after? So obviously we've established that I
do spin class and I am the king of it,
and you know, I'm part of the Peloton fam. You know,
I don't know if they're sponsored yours or not yet,
but I mean probably going to be after this. But
(14:12):
you know, I mean I jump in the hot tub afterwards.
I mean I live in the North Pole Man.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
Yeah, that's a great place to be right after.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Ever sat in a hot tub?
Speaker 4 (14:23):
Are you like a one seeing cold? Two seedared? Is
missus claws in there with you?
Speaker 2 (14:28):
What are you trying to imply?
Speaker 4 (14:30):
I'm just asking if she gets enjoy the fruits of
your labor.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
The fruits of my labor, Let's just say she enjoys plenty.
But there is nothing, there is nothing more pleasant than
pouring yourself a glass of champagne sitting in a hot
tub when it is zero degrees outside and just watching
(14:55):
the condensation form to ice on the side of your glass.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
That does.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
That, to me, is a job well done.
Speaker 4 (15:07):
This episode of Laugh with Me is brought to you
by Amazon's ability to know exactly what you're thinking and
what you want in this moment. Isn't it weird how
sometimes you'll just mention something and then the next thing
you know, you're getting like sponsored ads and are coming
up in your timeline and all your apps, and it's like, oh, shoot, yeah,
I was just thinking about that. Yeah, it's not by accident.
(15:28):
Amazon actually knows exactly what you want, when you want it,
and how you want it. Just give it a chance,
give it a try. Amazon knows if you are in
the business for a can of refried beans, that they'll
have refried beans in your carts ready to go. And
if you just asked Alexa, hey, tell me what I
need right now, without saying anything before it, she will
(15:50):
actually have an entire list in your cart and all
you have to do is hit send and those goods
will come to you within sixty three minutes. Yesazon can
now get you anything you're thinking about in your cart
and into your home within sixty three minutes. This kind
of technology number one can't be done by Santa Claus,
(16:10):
takes him an entire year, and can't be done by
any other business in the world. They have figured out
how to know exactly what you're thinking and what you're
gonna need a good fourteen days and a half in advance.
Just think, hey, it's the beginning of December. I know that,
you know, probably Christmas Day I'm gonna want a prime rim.
(16:33):
Amazon already knows. They already have a cart set up
that when you go into your cart, it has a
separate tab and that's your three weeks down the line tabs.
It knows what you're gonna need in approximately twenty four days.
It's kind of like an Advent calendar, except for what
you're gonna need. There's different tabs for every day of
the month. Just check it out. Amazon has everything. Mister Bezos,
(16:57):
he's onto something, well, at least the developers for Bezos says,
I don't think he's boring behind the operation. My bad,
buddy if you are, But I just don't believe that
he's sitting around coming up with all these genius ideas.
I do not buy it, but he is a proud
sponsor of Laugh with Me, and we want to thank
you to Amazon and all their brilliant people for coming
(17:17):
up with knowing exactly what we're thinking about and what
we need in every waking moment. Now back to the episode.
We've got Satan Nicholas here live from the North Bowl.
He's fresh office spin class talking to us about Christmas Eve.
So has the Naughty List ever been wrong?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
Like?
Speaker 4 (17:38):
I know you got the good list, the naughty list?
Have you ever gotten it wrongted to those poor kids,
the ones who end up on the naughty list and
they wake up Christmas morning and they get cold. I mean,
look what you've done.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
So you know, I will admit to the disaster of
twenty eighteen. I fully admit to it. I accept that
I was wrong. I tried to make it up to people,
and I'm sorry. I'm sorry about that year.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
You know a lot of people blamed Donald Trump for that,
and it was actually Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Whoa whoa, whoa, whoa whoa.
Speaker 7 (18:29):
I accept the blame for AI. I should not have
automated the Nadia with and that falls back on me.
That was unprepared to filter through the people like I
thought that they should, and I have corrected that, but
(18:50):
I do not accept.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
A personal responsibility for it.
Speaker 4 (18:54):
Man Father Christmas here spilling his guts on the failed
attempt to use it to determine the natty list. So
coal for the knotty boys and girls around the world.
I mean, where the hell are you getting all this coal?
North Pole does not seem like a coal mine.
Speaker 2 (19:12):
I'm sorry, the question was on coal.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
Yes, where are you getting all this coal from the
ground in the North Pole?
Speaker 2 (19:22):
Well, I mean it's in the ground all over, so
I mean it's it's dinosaur bones.
Speaker 4 (19:28):
You got the elves working on this. I mean, I
guess what kind of operation are you running there for
the coal.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
I'm really getting uncomfortable before this interview is heading. So
you let's just say, let's just say I have my
means to extract the coal that is in the ground
any way to pick up.
Speaker 4 (19:51):
We are so blessed into people's stockings, so blessed to
have the ash Man here talking.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
Twenty team now got col since then.
Speaker 4 (20:04):
So, Chris Kringle, I just I got to know. I mean,
you've had a lot of time in your hands. I
know you're it's a long year getting to this point.
I'm sure you've got time to watch some movies. Have
you seen anything new lately?
Speaker 2 (20:17):
I watched Napoleon last night.
Speaker 4 (20:19):
Yeah, what'd you think?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Didn't have much of a Christmas spirit to it?
Speaker 4 (20:24):
Were you expecting Napoleon a holiday flare?
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Well? I mean a movie comes out on Thanksgiving. We
all know that once the Thanksgiving mule is consumed, that
it's my season. Yeah, well that it's Christmas seasons to be.
I never presume to put myself above the season. I
am kind of the main event. But you know, I mean, I.
Speaker 4 (20:50):
Will say, you've had some competition as of late, you know.
And I don't want to take away from the Napoleon movie,
but Mariah Carey's kind of claiming your fame right now,
you know.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Act which I'm not afraid of, Mariah. Carry What I
was more annoyed about was when I was watching the
Napoleon movie, every time it hit a quiet spot, Yeah,
I could hear all this music going on and I
didn't understand it. And then it hit me about halfways
through Beyonce.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
Beyonce, yep, the new Beyonce movie.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
You know, what's frustrating being a public figure?
Speaker 4 (21:24):
What's up?
Speaker 2 (21:26):
I could do? Like, I can't. I can't put myself
against Beyonce, have you? I mean you've seen that, You've
seen the Bayhive?
Speaker 4 (21:36):
You know you. One would think the Father Christmas would
be able to get a private showing of a movie
and not have to worry about this app They comment.
I'm just saying, I'm just keeping a reel.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
I told, I told Johnny, bring.
Speaker 4 (21:50):
That up, Johnny. I'm just proud of the guy for
booking one of the biggest guests we've ever ever had
here on laugh with me, and that is the biggest, fattest,
jolliest fella you can find, and that is Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
What like? Like, I'm doing a spin class.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
Well, that'll help. I'm riding a bike, So I have
to wonder, do you do the spin class all year
long just to help you get in shape so that
you can eat cookies at every home you visit on
Christmas Eve?
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Oh? Oh oh, you got me, you got me, you
got me, I've ridden you.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
Oh I figured.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Any different than the people that you know. I'm just
I'm just a normal guy. I got a whole bunch
of Elves.
Speaker 4 (22:58):
I gotta ask you while I got you on the
line still, Uh, COVID Christmas? What was that like? Did
you have different protocols at the shop?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
That's what the Beard's for, as.
Speaker 4 (23:10):
The beard, the Beard, the Beard blocked the COVID from you.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Yeah, yeah, I mean I've been through this before. I
love it.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
Did you have it all?
Speaker 2 (23:19):
Right?
Speaker 4 (23:19):
So the beard protected you when you were in the
homes as well, and I'm assuming.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean the restaurant I'm not too
concerned about.
Speaker 4 (23:27):
Yeah, No, I could see that. Okay, San, this is
the part of the show where I work out new
joke ideas. I've never worked this joke on stage before,
so I'm giving it to you for the first time,
and then feel free to laugh. Okay, feel free to
(23:48):
give me your comments. Okay, some good feedback, okay. Oh,
Los Angeles is starting to paint many streets white like
the reflectivity would reduce city summer temperatures by up to
ten degrees fahrenheit. I saw that, actually, I read it,
and I thought that's great. I've never thought of that,
(24:11):
and my wife instantly was like, yeah, because all those sleepless,
sleepless nights trying to solve global warming. That's the that's
the punchline.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
No, wh whoa whoa quite the sense of you do.
Speaker 6 (24:32):
We're a really big boy.
Speaker 4 (24:40):
Really big boy? What is that?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
What do you want for Christmas?
Speaker 4 (24:47):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (24:48):
Man?
Speaker 4 (24:48):
How about this one? I'm getting old and I'm at
the point now where you know, the the old bullshit
that you know, like your dad would tell you, just
doesn't fly anymore, like back in my day. You know,
he can't run that by me anymore. Back in my
day he would say he played outside all day and night,
and my kids don't. And that's because dad. We also
(25:09):
did our research. We found out there's people out there
raping kids. Sannah, do you have any jokes to work
out for the people?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Never need them?
Speaker 4 (25:25):
Never need them? That's true. You got the classic go tos,
the ho ho ho and a bottle of rum, you know,
like a pirate. Yeah, are you okay over there?
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Santa? That's I can do. It is horrible. Don't ever
air that. That's bad.
Speaker 4 (25:42):
I was gonna air it. I guess I was never
gonnas it on stage.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Well, that one, that one you just needed to do.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
The yeah, just end the episode there o ho Okay,
Well we had the ash Man, Chris Kringle, Father Christmas,
Papa Noel, Noel, Baba, Santa Claus. We had him here
(26:18):
just weeks before the big Christmas Eve. He's doing spin classes,
so we you know, a lot of times this is
where people promote, like, you know, maybe something they have
coming up. Obviously you have Christmas Eve coming up. Is
there anywhere else people can find you? No, not at
your local malls and local grocery stores and maybe no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
No talk to me. Don't walk up to me, don't
call my attention lap the table when I walked by you.
Oh no, I want to live my normal life.
Speaker 4 (27:00):
I've never heard of Santa not wanting attention. But here
we are. We've gotten to that point.
Speaker 2 (27:09):
I was sorry for twenty eighteen. Know what else you
want for me?
Speaker 4 (27:13):
I'm not blaming you for twenty eighteen. I just thought
it needed addressed.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Algorithm decides what you guys get, not what you wanted.
Well it's not what you deserved.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
Oh no, all right, Anna.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
So alone, I'm going to be doing my spin glasses.
I'm going to be going to the hotub with Missus Claus.
Speaker 4 (27:33):
Okay, that's good. I wanted to know.
Speaker 2 (27:35):
That you know, I'm going to be drinking some champagne.
I'm going to be letting my glass frost up. Why
does it have to be a big deal? Why am
I responsible for your happiness this time of season?
Speaker 4 (27:48):
You are a big deal.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
I know.
Speaker 4 (27:57):
You're killing me. Did you give me COVID for Christmas?
I am coughing.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
I gave you continence. I gave you the ability to poop.
Speaker 4 (28:08):
Yeah, I know, and I feel it.
Speaker 2 (28:10):
Want it.
Speaker 4 (28:11):
I feel it every day, every single day, whether I
want it or not. Sometimes at the most miss like
inopportune moments.
Speaker 6 (28:19):
Oh, sometimes Christmas comes at the most inopportune moments.
Speaker 4 (28:26):
Well, Christmas comes December twenty fifth every year.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
Well, sometimes you don't expect it.
Speaker 4 (28:32):
It happens every years. There's no surprises.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Sometimes Christmas is its own surprise, little boy Jesus.
Speaker 4 (28:42):
Okay, thank you Santa for coming on the show, taking
your time, enjoy your spin class, and tell missus clause
I said, I shall know what that means.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
No, well, jar me, but a special thank you to you.
Johnny Wake Wake
Snow falls down like a punchline joke. Jeremy, Oh it'
the mic, he spoke, Eric Larson Guest of.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
The Year, no doubt.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Johnny p in the booth, He's mixing it out. Santa's
got his slave, We've got our show, laughters, the gift,
Let the joy overflow. Laugh with me, Laugh with me,
Falla La la, Fun Stories and jokes till the night
(00:45):
is done. Thong song plays.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
While we sit there now, Oh Jy somewhere, but hey,
let's move along. Six Reindeer Racing, seven jokes deep, every
cracks upon.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Johnny's losing sleep. The mic is hot, the vibe so chill.
Jeremy is the captain of this laughter filled thrill. Candy
Canes and Punchline Swirl podcasts gold In the Christmas World, Pas,
the cookiees, the milk, the cheer.
Speaker 4 (01:22):
Let's toast to the laughs and a brighter new year.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Laugh with me, Laugh with me, La La la.
Speaker 5 (01:30):
Funs, Stories and jokes till the night is done.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Long song plays while we sip bed Not Ojy somewhere,
but hey, Let's move along. Candy Canes and Punchline Swirl
podcast Golden Christmas World.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
Past the Cookies, the milk, the cheer.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
Let's toast to the laugh sand a brighter.
Speaker 5 (01:58):
New year, A laugh with me, laugh at me, all
lota fun.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Stories and jokes till the night it is done.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Long song, please while we sit there, oh Jay somewhere,
but hey, let's move along, let's move along, but hey,
let's move along.
Speaker 4 (02:51):
Welcome back. It is a laugh with me, a podcast
with Jeremy Odom and I'm your home ja oh and
here and laugh with me.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
Boy.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
We are in the holiday spirits. Happy Honkah, Merry Christmas.
So much just feel good, exciting, up beat energy in
the air right now, except for little grinchy in some places,
(03:28):
by the way, not Johnny, it's not that it's not
that you're not in the Christmas spirit. It's just you
tend to just kind of stay the same. I mean,
you're as a guy, Johnny, you're kind of a grump
(03:50):
and a lot of people at the holiday times, you know,
the spirits get raised just a little bit, they get
a little more pep in their step, gives you some family,
some friends, maybe take some time off from work. And
uh my guy, you're I'm not saying you get grumpier,
(04:11):
but you're certainly not fitting the you know, I suppose
the holiday spirit and then no I'm not. I'm not
kidding around like you like seriously, let's let's feel the energy. Okay,
let's feel the energy around you. Go out, go to
some stores. That's what you need to do. That's what
the holiday season is about. Go out to some stores
(04:31):
and just absorb all that feel good that's going on
around there and then maybe get a little more pepping
your step. Buddy. But anyway, we we've got a good
one for you here today because we're gonna rewind you.
We are gonna rewind you. It was the end of
twenty twenty three. One of the biggest guests we've ever
(04:52):
had here on Laugh with Me It is the big
Guy himself, Chris Kringle. Santa Claus was on the show.
This was in the early days of the pod, like
real early days of the pot. So this is gonna
be a lot of fun. It was a good chat
with the big Man. We get to hear about what
exactly is he's doing as he watches a sleep you know,
(05:13):
you know famously Santa watches you in your sleep, So
we're gonna we're gonna ask him you know what's what
we did, ask him, what's the deal, what exactly it
is that you're looking for it? Just kind of see
what it is he does throughout the rest of the year. Uh,
he had a lot to say. So this was a
big get for us. Early on in the show. We're
(05:35):
bringing it back to you. It's the rewind laugh with
Me with special guests Santa Claw. Okay, right here is
the big guy. It is Santa Claus on laugh with me. Hello,
Holy Christmas, Santa Claus you're you're actually here, You're on
(05:58):
Laugh with Me.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
If you wouldn't talk over me. I don't know if
you heard, but I said, ho ho ho, I said,
Merry Christmas.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
Oh yeah, no I heard. I heard mer Christmas. You
do love to send that greeting out to the people.
But thanks for coming on the show and spending some
time with us.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
I would love nothing better than to spread my Christmas cheer.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
So you're it's almost Christmas Eve. We're just you know,
a couple of weeks away. Like, what are you up
to right now?
Speaker 2 (06:30):
You know, I've really gotten into spin classes here recently.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
Spin classes.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Yeah, I'm doing a lot of bike riding.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
Why why are you bike riding right now. It's the
busiest time of year for you.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
I mean, I don't do shit Hi gifts like, I
don't know how to do it.
Speaker 4 (06:50):
So you're just a delegator.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Yes. Have you not participated in Christmas cheer up to
this point in your life?
Speaker 5 (06:59):
No?
Speaker 4 (06:59):
I have.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
I guess you should know that I am the distributor.
I work on logistics.
Speaker 4 (07:05):
So you're wow, you're just strictly in logistics. Then, so Sannah,
So you're busy running spinning classes while your team is
creating all the gifts and gathering everything for the children
all across the world.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
Right right, right?
Speaker 4 (07:21):
When do you follow up? I mean again, I'm assuming
you're getting reports back from from the works.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Follow up? What's a competition? Who else you going to
go to?
Speaker 4 (07:35):
That's a good point. I will say you have had
a stronghold on Christmas for a long time. Amazon appears
to be gaining some steam.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Woa, whoa, whoa, whoa whoa Amazon?
Speaker 4 (07:50):
Yeah, Jeff Bezos, I have right.
Speaker 6 (07:53):
Now, Oh monopoly, I get a crouch on. So you're talking,
I'm not afraid of Amazon.
Speaker 4 (08:04):
So Amazon has nothing on Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
No, Amazon parents are buying their kids gifts on Amazon.
Maybe sure, sure, sure, But who are they saying the
gift is from.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
Yeah, that's a good point. It is it is from
Santa Claus. Yeah, that's solid point. People are at parents
all across the world are a Do you think it's
a little embarrassed, you know, to say it'd be from Amazon.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah. The game is the same now as it was
forty years ago. The game was the same now as
it was eighty years ago. Like, don't come at me,
don't come at me.
Speaker 4 (08:40):
So what are some of the popular gifts this year
that kids are asking for.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
Well, I think it's funny these kids, because I mean, honestly,
I get requests from everybody. I get requests from all
age groups. Wow, and you know what, you know what
most people want? What continence? They want to be able
to poop?
Speaker 4 (09:03):
You're saying everybody wants to poop. How exactly are they
asking you?
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Well, normally I prescribed caffeine.
Speaker 4 (09:11):
Oh oh, you're sending caffeine to the folks.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, you know, that'll normally get the job done. I mean,
if it doesn't, you know, maybe the next year they
might ask me something a little bit stronger.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
Yeah, I will say Santa I have have zero issues
in the pooping area. As you know, I have Crohn's disease.
Is it possible that this was a Christmas gift from
Old Saint Nick a few years back.
Speaker 7 (09:36):
No, no, No, In fact, exactly the opposite.
Speaker 4 (09:40):
Oh, thank you. Well, as we all know, Santa watches
you when you sleep. What's some of the oddest things
you've seen when watching people?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
What you know, it was really an evolution in watching people.
For a couple of years. When I was watching people,
what I really keyed in on was I loved the
arm filters. People that would just throw their arms across
that they would flat people in the face. You know,
just all the arguments that that would cause.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
Yeah, what do you mean, people slapping across the face?
What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (10:19):
You know what I mean? Don't don't. I've watched you sleep.
I've seen Ashley lay that left hand across the face.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
Well, you know what, you son of a bitch? I
thought you referring to the time I had a dream
where I was fighting Chuck Norris and I did actually
throw an arm over to the left side.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Oh oh, that's funny. Because of how you treat your audience,
the fact that you withhold information like that. I don't
do them.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
I don't withhold anything from anyone.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Well, and speaking of withholding, that was actually kind of
my second evolution is you know, after I tired of
the arm flailers, I really enjoyed the blanket stealers. You
know those people that would just kind of hog all
the blankets, They pull them all to their side, leave
the other person cold. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (11:14):
See, that's the thing. Folks who steal blankets. I call
them the poor people. Santa. I feel like you like
that joke.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
No, I'm offended by that joke. I'm offended by that
joke because the people that you call poor are the
same people that are asking me for gifts every year.
Speaker 4 (11:39):
That is true, Well, you're.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Asking me for that blanket because they know that that
blanket's going to get stolen. We touched on this idea
of like what do you watch for when you sleep?
And honestly, what I watch for when I sleep when
people are sleeping, well, when I'm sleeping, when everybody is sleeping,
what I watch for BedHead?
Speaker 4 (12:03):
You're watching for the BedHead?
Speaker 2 (12:05):
I love it. I love it. I honestly I'll get
like I love people that spend a lot of time
with their hair and then they kind of turn over
a little bit and the thing turns into a mohawk.
I love it when people who don't care about their
hair make up and the hair just looks perfect like
it was like on a TV show. Like I just
(12:27):
I want to see that because that is the randomness.
That's what I crave. I've seen every other kind of
sleeping that there could happen.
Speaker 4 (12:36):
You're telling me right now that your favorite part of
watching people when they sleep is seeing what happens to
their hair. Yeah, you're a sick freak, Sana. I just
want to say, you've got some like some weird cakes.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
I don't like. I guess I don't understand the fascination.
Like you guys know I'm here. You guys have known
I'm here since the beginning.
Speaker 4 (13:01):
We've got Chris Kringle here on laugh with me. What
are some of your favorite places to visit on Christmas Eve?
Speaker 2 (13:09):
I have a lot to do. I have a lot
to do. I very refined taste.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
Refined taste last for.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
The most basic things.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Candy canes and gum drops are your game. What do
you mean refined taste?
Speaker 2 (13:24):
I think compars because nothing is unique. Well, I like
every single place that I could go after Christmas, That's
where I want to go. Like, I don't want to
spend more time on Christmas, I don't want to spend
more time watching you guys. So I have stuff to do.
Speaker 4 (13:45):
What do you do? What do you do after delivering
gifts all over the world on Christmas Eve? What exactly
does Santa Claus do?
Speaker 2 (13:51):
You said? Right after? So obviously we've established that I
do spin class and I am the king of it,
and you know, I'm part of the Peloton fam. You know,
I don't know if they're sponsored yours or not yet,
but I mean probably going to be after this. But
(14:12):
you know, I mean I jump in the hot tub afterwards.
I mean I live in the North Pole Man.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
Yeah, that's a great place to be right after.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Ever sat in a hot tub?
Speaker 4 (14:23):
Are you like a one seeing cold? Two seedared? Is
missus claws in there with you?
Speaker 2 (14:28):
What are you trying to imply?
Speaker 4 (14:30):
I'm just asking if she gets enjoy the fruits of
your labor.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
The fruits of my labor, Let's just say she enjoys plenty.
But there is nothing, there is nothing more pleasant than
pouring yourself a glass of champagne sitting in a hot
tub when it is zero degrees outside and just watching
(14:55):
the condensation form to ice on the side of your glass.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
That does.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
That, to me, is a job well done.
Speaker 4 (15:07):
This episode of Laugh with Me is brought to you
by Amazon's ability to know exactly what you're thinking and
what you want in this moment. Isn't it weird how
sometimes you'll just mention something and then the next thing
you know, you're getting like sponsored ads and are coming
up in your timeline and all your apps, and it's like, oh, shoot, yeah,
I was just thinking about that. Yeah, it's not by accident.
(15:28):
Amazon actually knows exactly what you want, when you want it,
and how you want it. Just give it a chance,
give it a try. Amazon knows if you are in
the business for a can of refried beans, that they'll
have refried beans in your carts ready to go. And
if you just asked Alexa, hey, tell me what I
need right now, without saying anything before it, she will
(15:50):
actually have an entire list in your cart and all
you have to do is hit send and those goods
will come to you within sixty three minutes. Yesazon can
now get you anything you're thinking about in your cart
and into your home within sixty three minutes. This kind
of technology number one can't be done by Santa Claus,
(16:10):
takes him an entire year, and can't be done by
any other business in the world. They have figured out
how to know exactly what you're thinking and what you're
gonna need a good fourteen days and a half in advance.
Just think, hey, it's the beginning of December. I know that,
you know, probably Christmas Day I'm gonna want a prime rim.
(16:33):
Amazon already knows. They already have a cart set up
that when you go into your cart, it has a
separate tab and that's your three weeks down the line tabs.
It knows what you're gonna need in approximately twenty four days.
It's kind of like an Advent calendar, except for what
you're gonna need. There's different tabs for every day of
the month. Just check it out. Amazon has everything. Mister Bezos,
(16:57):
he's onto something, well, at least the developers for Bezos says,
I don't think he's boring behind the operation. My bad,
buddy if you are, But I just don't believe that
he's sitting around coming up with all these genius ideas.
I do not buy it, but he is a proud
sponsor of Laugh with Me, and we want to thank
you to Amazon and all their brilliant people for coming
(17:17):
up with knowing exactly what we're thinking about and what
we need in every waking moment. Now back to the episode.
We've got Satan Nicholas here live from the North Bowl.
He's fresh office spin class talking to us about Christmas Eve.
So has the Naughty List ever been wrong?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
Like?
Speaker 4 (17:38):
I know you got the good list, the naughty list?
Have you ever gotten it wrongted to those poor kids,
the ones who end up on the naughty list and
they wake up Christmas morning and they get cold. I mean,
look what you've done.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
So you know, I will admit to the disaster of
twenty eighteen. I fully admit to it. I accept that
I was wrong. I tried to make it up to people,
and I'm sorry. I'm sorry about that year.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
You know a lot of people blamed Donald Trump for that,
and it was actually Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Whoa whoa, whoa, whoa whoa.
Speaker 7 (18:29):
I accept the blame for AI. I should not have
automated the Nadia with and that falls back on me.
That was unprepared to filter through the people like I
thought that they should, and I have corrected that, but
(18:50):
I do not accept.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
A personal responsibility for it.
Speaker 4 (18:54):
Man Father Christmas here spilling his guts on the failed
attempt to use it to determine the natty list. So
coal for the knotty boys and girls around the world.
I mean, where the hell are you getting all this coal?
North Pole does not seem like a coal mine.
Speaker 2 (19:12):
I'm sorry, the question was on coal.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
Yes, where are you getting all this coal from the
ground in the North Pole?
Speaker 2 (19:22):
Well, I mean it's in the ground all over, so
I mean it's it's dinosaur bones.
Speaker 4 (19:28):
You got the elves working on this. I mean, I
guess what kind of operation are you running there for
the coal.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
I'm really getting uncomfortable before this interview is heading. So
you let's just say, let's just say I have my
means to extract the coal that is in the ground
any way to pick up.
Speaker 4 (19:51):
We are so blessed into people's stockings, so blessed to
have the ash Man here talking.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
Twenty team now got col since then.
Speaker 4 (20:04):
So, Chris Kringle, I just I got to know. I mean,
you've had a lot of time in your hands. I
know you're it's a long year getting to this point.
I'm sure you've got time to watch some movies. Have
you seen anything new lately?
Speaker 2 (20:17):
I watched Napoleon last night.
Speaker 4 (20:19):
Yeah, what'd you think?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Didn't have much of a Christmas spirit to it?
Speaker 4 (20:24):
Were you expecting Napoleon a holiday flare?
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Well? I mean a movie comes out on Thanksgiving. We
all know that once the Thanksgiving mule is consumed, that
it's my season. Yeah, well that it's Christmas seasons to be.
I never presume to put myself above the season. I
am kind of the main event. But you know, I mean, I.
Speaker 4 (20:50):
Will say, you've had some competition as of late, you know.
And I don't want to take away from the Napoleon movie,
but Mariah Carey's kind of claiming your fame right now,
you know.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Act which I'm not afraid of, Mariah. Carry What I
was more annoyed about was when I was watching the
Napoleon movie, every time it hit a quiet spot, Yeah,
I could hear all this music going on and I
didn't understand it. And then it hit me about halfways
through Beyonce.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
Beyonce, yep, the new Beyonce movie.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
You know, what's frustrating being a public figure?
Speaker 4 (21:24):
What's up?
Speaker 2 (21:26):
I could do? Like, I can't. I can't put myself
against Beyonce, have you? I mean you've seen that, You've
seen the Bayhive?
Speaker 4 (21:36):
You know you. One would think the Father Christmas would
be able to get a private showing of a movie
and not have to worry about this app They comment.
I'm just saying, I'm just keeping a reel.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
I told, I told Johnny, bring.
Speaker 4 (21:50):
That up, Johnny. I'm just proud of the guy for
booking one of the biggest guests we've ever ever had
here on laugh with me, and that is the biggest, fattest,
jolliest fella you can find, and that is Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
What like? Like, I'm doing a spin class.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
Well, that'll help. I'm riding a bike, So I have
to wonder, do you do the spin class all year
long just to help you get in shape so that
you can eat cookies at every home you visit on
Christmas Eve?
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Oh? Oh oh, you got me, you got me, you
got me, I've ridden you.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
Oh I figured.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Any different than the people that you know. I'm just
I'm just a normal guy. I got a whole bunch
of Elves.
Speaker 4 (22:58):
I gotta ask you while I got you on the
line still, Uh, COVID Christmas? What was that like? Did
you have different protocols at the shop?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
That's what the Beard's for, as.
Speaker 4 (23:10):
The beard, the Beard, the Beard blocked the COVID from you.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Yeah, yeah, I mean I've been through this before. I
love it.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
Did you have it all?
Speaker 2 (23:19):
Right?
Speaker 4 (23:19):
So the beard protected you when you were in the
homes as well, and I'm assuming.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean the restaurant I'm not too
concerned about.
Speaker 4 (23:27):
Yeah, No, I could see that. Okay, San, this is
the part of the show where I work out new
joke ideas. I've never worked this joke on stage before,
so I'm giving it to you for the first time,
and then feel free to laugh. Okay, feel free to
(23:48):
give me your comments. Okay, some good feedback, okay. Oh,
Los Angeles is starting to paint many streets white like
the reflectivity would reduce city summer temperatures by up to
ten degrees fahrenheit. I saw that, actually, I read it,
and I thought that's great. I've never thought of that,
(24:11):
and my wife instantly was like, yeah, because all those sleepless,
sleepless nights trying to solve global warming. That's the that's
the punchline.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
No, wh whoa whoa quite the sense of you do.
Speaker 6 (24:32):
We're a really big boy.
Speaker 4 (24:40):
Really big boy? What is that?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
What do you want for Christmas?
Speaker 4 (24:47):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (24:48):
Man?
Speaker 4 (24:48):
How about this one? I'm getting old and I'm at
the point now where you know, the the old bullshit
that you know, like your dad would tell you, just
doesn't fly anymore, like back in my day. You know,
he can't run that by me anymore. Back in my
day he would say he played outside all day and night,
and my kids don't. And that's because dad. We also
(25:09):
did our research. We found out there's people out there
raping kids. Sannah, do you have any jokes to work
out for the people?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Never need them?
Speaker 4 (25:25):
Never need them? That's true. You got the classic go tos,
the ho ho ho and a bottle of rum, you know,
like a pirate. Yeah, are you okay over there?
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Santa? That's I can do. It is horrible. Don't ever
air that. That's bad.
Speaker 4 (25:42):
I was gonna air it. I guess I was never
gonnas it on stage.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Well, that one, that one you just needed to do.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
The yeah, just end the episode there o ho Okay,
Well we had the ash Man, Chris Kringle, Father Christmas,
Papa Noel, Noel, Baba, Santa Claus. We had him here
(26:18):
just weeks before the big Christmas Eve. He's doing spin classes,
so we you know, a lot of times this is
where people promote, like, you know, maybe something they have
coming up. Obviously you have Christmas Eve coming up. Is
there anywhere else people can find you? No, not at
your local malls and local grocery stores and maybe no, no, no.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
No talk to me. Don't walk up to me, don't
call my attention lap the table when I walked by you.
Oh no, I want to live my normal life.
Speaker 4 (27:00):
I've never heard of Santa not wanting attention. But here
we are. We've gotten to that point.
Speaker 2 (27:09):
I was sorry for twenty eighteen. Know what else you
want for me?
Speaker 4 (27:13):
I'm not blaming you for twenty eighteen. I just thought
it needed addressed.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Algorithm decides what you guys get, not what you wanted.
Well it's not what you deserved.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
Oh no, all right, Anna.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
So alone, I'm going to be doing my spin glasses.
I'm going to be going to the hotub with Missus Claus.
Speaker 4 (27:33):
Okay, that's good. I wanted to know.
Speaker 2 (27:35):
That you know, I'm going to be drinking some champagne.
I'm going to be letting my glass frost up. Why
does it have to be a big deal? Why am
I responsible for your happiness this time of season?
Speaker 4 (27:48):
You are a big deal.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
I know.
Speaker 4 (27:57):
You're killing me. Did you give me COVID for Christmas?
I am coughing.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
I gave you continence. I gave you the ability to poop.
Speaker 4 (28:08):
Yeah, I know, and I feel it.
Speaker 2 (28:10):
Want it.
Speaker 4 (28:11):
I feel it every day, every single day, whether I
want it or not. Sometimes at the most miss like
inopportune moments.
Speaker 6 (28:19):
Oh, sometimes Christmas comes at the most inopportune moments.
Speaker 4 (28:26):
Well, Christmas comes December twenty fifth every year.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
Well, sometimes you don't expect it.
Speaker 4 (28:32):
It happens every years. There's no surprises.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Sometimes Christmas is its own surprise, little boy Jesus.
Speaker 4 (28:42):
Okay, thank you Santa for coming on the show, taking
your time, enjoy your spin class, and tell missus clause
I said, I shall know what that means.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
No, well, jar me, but a special thank you to you.
Johnny Wake Wake
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