Finding Rory!

What happened to Rory?! He fell in love and disappeared.

Find out what happened to Rory and Danielle...

Giannina talks to Rory and gets all the answers

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:06):
Welcome to Love Insight or welcome back we hope to
Love Insight. You subscribe to the series. This is the
official podcast from the official Kinetic content I Heeart Media
joint venture that will cover every little detail. Every question
you may have will be examined. It will be a
deep dive into the global phenomenon that is love and blood,

(00:28):
that is Love is Blind. I am here. I met
Money Smith by the way to my right. More importantly,
once again is Gi and Nina or G. I feel
like we're now alright, We're good exactly friends and I
can call you Ge. But we're gonna get deep into
episode one. If you missed episode one of our podcast,
we didn't talk about episode one of Love is Blind

(00:48):
all that much. We kind of got into your backstory,
shared how you found yourself on the show Love is Blind.
But for this one, are you ready, We're getting right
into it. This's just the episode one of Love is Blind. Rundown,
Wow doing Money. Here we go one. You walk in
the door. You're the first face we see. Door opens,
it's you. What were you girls talking about? How much
time did you have together before you get to the

(01:09):
pods to kind of get to know one another. Um.
We had I think a couple of hours in total, UM,
and I think we're just kind of looking at each
other's outfits and just trying to get each other's like
feel for one another. And it was just like super giddy,
super excited, not knowing what to expect. Um. So it
was very It was about competitive spirit. Did you feel like, hey,

(01:31):
all right, I'm I'm the best looking one in here,
so I feel good about myself? Like were you measuring
the other girls? Up? Um? I thought everyone was beautiful.
I didn't ever. I was never like, oh, I'm the
cutest one. Like No, I was like, oh my god,
they're also beautiful. Like how am I ever going to measure? Up? Um?
I did that plant maybe kind of a seed in
your your brain of wow, all the all the girls
are attractive, so I'm guessing all the guys are probably attractive. Yes,

(01:55):
So I was hoping that that was the case, because
you know, maybe it was like a Beauty and the
Beast kind of thing that was going on and we
didn't know about it. But I was like, Okay, everyone
here is you know, very attractive, very outgoing. I'm sure
that if they really want us to fall in love
they're going to kind of match us. So that was comforting, right,
I've mentioned it, We mentioned it, Um, you brought it
up in the last episode of the podcast. You do

(02:17):
have roommates and you had to, so you had you
ended up with Lauren, but you started with Lexi Lexi,
So share with us kind of how why did you
switch roommates and and what was it like being with
the roommate. Had do you have a roommate? Had you
slept in the same room of someone regularly for a while?
Was that weird? No? I mean I thought it was
really fun. I lived with a couple of girls, um

(02:38):
a couple of years prior. I had two roommates myself,
so I was just like, oh, I'm back in that whole.
We stayed up all night talking just like what do
you think his face is going to look like? Well,
I don't know, and we know we would always just
kind of share stories and kind of share insight of
Oh like I heard this about Damien, I heard this
about Cameron or you know, Leslie, And it was just

(02:59):
a very fun got the worst rap? Who got the
worst rap? Straight out of the the gate? Like stay away,
this guy is the worst? Was there like John. We
brought him up in the last episod, like not a
single person came back and was like, you know what,
there's this guy John that I'm kind of feeling had
a single soul. Okay, so John's out. I've got a

(03:20):
million questions, all right, don't want to get right into him.
Short guy Wesley love him. That's all we know about
him is that he was short guy Wesley. How tall
was he? Did you ever get a chance to meet
him or no? I got a chance to meet him
after we wrapped, and okay, we all kind of got
like five one is he five three? Is he shorter
than you? Yeah, he's shorter than me. I think he
hits like my nose, probably seven. Okay, so he's super

(03:43):
short guy Wesley. I guess that's what he called super short.
That's what he said. He's like, I never see if people,
you know, women don't go for short guys. I'm a
short guy. So he disappears. Were you surprised? Like how
about this? Did you have any conversation with him in
the pods? Yeah? Um, he was just very open, Uh,
shared a lot about his family and him and Lexei

(04:05):
had a great connection because they both had um, I think,
like the same like religious beliefs and things like that,
so they kind of bonded in that. Yeah, that was
kind of That was one of the weird things in
episode one, like the the how fast that Jessica and
Mark connected just because they were both Chicago people, like
that was kind of the foundation of their relationship. She's like,

(04:25):
I'm from Chicago and that was it as like, oh
you're too okay us day Um, well, I think they
just picked fun moments to show between the couples. Um.
But there were definitely a lot of in depth conversations
that took place very long hours from that episode one.
I mean we got a lot out of out of
the first episode of Love is Blind. So give us

(04:47):
an idea, like, how how long were you in a
pod with Damien and the like for like the longest?
Can you stay in there as long as you want?
Is there a timer? Like how does all that work? Yeah,
so there's a time for him on there. You could definitely,
you know, lose all sense of time. I didn't have.
I lost all sense of time and space in there,

(05:08):
so it felt like I was in there for a year. Um,
But really it was just a couple of days really,
and that is that because you're developing relationships and you're like,
how is it that I've got to know these people
so well? Or I'm making it? Is that what? That's
what it was. It was more emotional, so emotional. There
are so many transformations that happened in there with within
people themselves and while you're finding a partner. It was

(05:29):
a very transformative like experience. Um, it's a it's a
social experiment, true and true. Speaking of a social experiment. Uh.
It is regularly said that alcohol is the lubricant the conversation.
It seemed like there was a lot of alcohol in there.
Did uh Did you feel like that? That was something
that a lot of people us. Do you feel like,

(05:50):
you know what, I'm gonna take a have a pop
or something like that, and that kind of loosened things
up a little bit, a little shot, take the edge off.
Is that what everybody was doing? Um? I guess I
don't know if everyone was doing it. I you know,
I had had a glass of wine here and there.
I stopped drinking after the third day. But it's just
kind of like a normal date. If you go and
you have dinner with someone, you order a bottle of
wine and you kind of just hang out and talk

(06:12):
that way. Uh, some people were always with third glass
of wine. Jessica, she drank it all. She drank everything. Um,
was she drunk the entire time? I didn't notice that
she was drunk the entire time, if you had to guess,
I mean, we all cope our different. This is the

(06:32):
love insight here and and I understand was it like
was it claustrophobic? Was it uncomfortable? It could definitely get
that way. You walk in and you're in this like
tiny little lounge space with like this little couch and
a little bark cart and like a bunch of cameras everywhere,
and like this frozen blue wall just kind of you know,

(06:56):
keeping you in a trance. And its like a confessional
booth and a confessional booth. It was the most therapeutic
experience I've ever had in my life. Really, did you
like being in the pod? I loved it. It was
it felt like I was kind of I don't want
to say, in jail, but it was like you're confined,
but it felt so free. Well, we'll find out if

(07:17):
you're alone in that sentiment or if others will join you. Because,
by the way, a little bit later in this very pod,
we're gonna talk to Rory. So let's get to Rory.
Because Rory is someone who is you know, he is
a moon that is orbiting this planet that his love
is blind. We know a little bit about him. We
saw his name flash on the screen. He we see

(07:37):
more conversations with Rory with the guys because he's kind
of like their amateur psychologist than with the girls. What
can you tell us about Rory? Rory is that friend
that you can just tell your whole life too, and
he will. He will never judge you. He will listen
to every single word, and he will probably give you
the best advice you've ever had in your life. And

(07:59):
it's just such a nice He's such a fun, lighthearted person.
But you can tell he takes all of that in himself.
And did you experience that in the pot He was
the first person I cried with in the pods. Really,
how many people did you cry with in the Pods? Um?
I would say maybe like three. Um, it was definitely
Damien Rory, and I think I cried with Barnette. With

(08:23):
Barnett out of anger, like we we we spoke. I
spoke with him, and that it was just like, you
have to let your walls down, man, and he was like,
I can't, I can't, And I told him I was
on the count of three, We're gonna yell, and one
to three, and we just yelled and it was just
like this very I think he kind of shout a tear. Well.

(08:44):
I don't know if I made him cry, but I
think I let him release. It seemed like through the
course of the first episode that Barnett was the most
popular guy. And I don't know if that's just because
he probably got the most screen time, but you saw
a connection with with he and Jessica. You saw in
him a connection with he and Amber, an immediate connection
with he and l. C. Land And then of course
you see the conversation back in your living quarters with

(09:06):
all of them kind of like side eyeing each other
because everyone's bringing up the name with Barnett, did you
feel that way? Was he the quickest connection you made? Yeah,
for sure. He was my first date. So as soon
as I went in there, we we spoke and we
laughed and we just kind of shoot. And he was
just such an easy guy to get along with. It.
I went out of the pod and I was like,
this is it. I don't have to look anymore further.

(09:28):
This is my guy. So did that set other Do
you feel like that maybe set you back a little
bit that kind of So? Was it almost like a
race where hey, so the races now started. Barnett's in
the league and now you're seeing whether or not anyone
can overtake him as you go through these pod dates.
Or did it work itself out where Barnett started to
wear on you a little bit and it was like, hey,
that was nice at first, but I'm over Yeah, that

(09:50):
is what happened. Yeah, it was more of like this
infatuation and such a fun guy, and then afterwards it
was like, well I need to have a real conversation
with you. Um, and it just we just kind of
dwindled on each other, I think because it's not meant
to be all right. I got a million questions because again,
this this first episode is the one who is the
girl with the long black hair that it looks like

(10:13):
maybe Rory was with her Danielle drew In. So who
is Danielle? Oh my gosh, she's my spirit animal, she's
your spirit Yes, you have another human as a spirit animal. Yes, really, yes,
she calls me her wise owl okay, um, which could
be a spirit animal. Yeah, so we kind of saw
that in each other. I think I saw her was
like my lion us. Um. She's just such a calm

(10:36):
and like sensual, just like light. Um. And she was
she and Rory got engaged. Yeah. Okay, so we're gonna
get that from Rory when he calls in. We're going
to get so had a whole love story, and we'll
get the whole thing. We will get every last detail. Okay,
So let's let's put a bookmark there because that's gonna
come up later in this pod. Rory's going to join

(10:58):
us and what's her name? Her name Danielle. Danielle. All right,
so we're gonna get into Danielle and Rory um and
then else. Let's see, there's Ebany we talked about. Ebany
was the girl who said it's the size of the wave,
not the motion of the ocean. That's all we know.
Can you share anything else about her that you remember? Um?
She was really just fun. But at the end I

(11:22):
didn't speak to her so much. But um, really cute
makeup artist. How to go to style. Okay, nothing interesting though,
we're sharing here. How about Ali the Nurse? Was Alie
the Nurse interesting at all? Oh my god, Allie's the best? Okay?
Why is Ali the best? What would people that are
listening right now that got to see Ali the nurse
thirty one? I think? Does that sound right? What do
we need to know about Ali the nurse? Ali is
an outspoken uh knows what she wants while ever back down,

(11:46):
will get you what you want. And what is she like?
Did she did she smuggle cigarettes into the body or
something like that? I mean kind of okay, if you
want to can get okay, I'm following. Did she did
she make a connection at all? No, she did not.
Not a one came out of the pod? Were how

(12:08):
many girls would you say? It came out of pods
and we're like, not happening. I think it was where
you did like any even want you to try to say, hey,
what about this guy? You know what I had a
conversation with Carlton or I had this conversation with well,
I think Taylor the Virgin he might be good for you.
We're gonna get the Taylor the Virgin in a minute.
That poor guy. I know. Um, it was more of

(12:29):
like I created friendships, but it wasn't a romantic endeavor
for half the girls there. Okay, how about four times
a day having sex? Lily May? How about what can
you tell us about Lily May? Who said she was
having sex four times a day? Dang, girl, you've got
going on? Um Lily May. Again, I didn't speak with

(12:51):
her so much, but that's fine. We already got to Wesley. Um,
what about the the guy and I don't know who
it was. Maybe someone in here help me out. The
guy who we see an episode one and the only
thing we get from him is in the pod. He
asked the person on the other side, Alright, I'm into
girls that are in shape and good looking. And that
was John. All right, Oh, that's the same guy's memorable

(13:14):
was there like two days? Well, all we saw was that,
and then the other part where I think you sound
like an African American was there with Lauren. So that's John.
All right, let's do it now, let's do Taylor super
preppy frat guy looking Taylor right wearing the blazer side part.
Did you have any dates with him? Yes? Okay, lots
of dates. Taylor Taylor was um someone that I connected

(13:37):
with on like an artistic level. He's a photographer and
I think we were just, um, really great friends. Did
any any of the guys, because you know, not every
And it was weird the way they were. They were
kind of labeled like, you know, Barnett says engineer, and
I'm like engineer, like a mechanical engineer is a chemical engineer.
And then I was like, no, I think he might
just be in construction and like he's a structural engineer

(13:59):
or something like that is gonna tell you whether your
house is going to fall over? Um? Was there any
were there? You? You mentioned you and Taylor and he
was asking you what you liked in bed and stuff?
How often did that happen? Did you guys win? And
he answered horribly. When I asked him how he would
what he would do if we went out on a date,
or how he would kiss me, I forgot the actual question,

(14:22):
but he was just very invasive for me, and I
was like, I need someone that's more respectful and isn't
talking about like full on started talking dirty, like dirty
sex talk kind of stuff. A little bit. Yeah, I
think I was just I'm again, I'm very picky about
Huella into my life. So I was like, if you're
not going to treat me with respect someone that you

(14:44):
potentially want to marry, Like, how have you been with
all other women? Like? Do you objectify us? And I
don't want to say that he did. Um, but I
think it was all in perfect timing where I asked
him and Damien kind of the same question and Damian
just answered beautifully right in Barnett not Taylor, Taylor, I'm sorry.
So what about what about sharing uh, your feelings about

(15:07):
what happens in the pods with other girls and then
recognizing that they're having similar experiences. We saw that in
the first episode, specifically with Barnett. Was that pretty common
because it seems like you're supposed to open up, you're
supposed to be vulnerable, UM, try to make this connection
with this person. Was it weird? Did it feel like
you were cheating on or they were cheating on you
or something like that when you found out that they

(15:28):
were having kind of extended conversations with other girls. I
didn't feel like we were cheating. I think we were
just being so open and we wanted to be able
to I guess like, no, the t in a sense
where it's like, Okay, so he's into you, well he's
also into me, But how do you guys connect? And
I think the girls specifically really created this open dialogue

(15:52):
within each other because we didn't want to get played.
We didn't want to I don't know. We didn't want
to feel like we were being led on, and so
it's like, hey, like I really like him and he
relates me too. Oh well, like I feel like a
good connection with him too, So can we talk about it? Like,
because at the end of the day, I want what's
best for you, know, I want what's best for you.

(16:12):
So it was a very good way of going about it. Um,
I don't know how it ended up. Who was the
first one that came in that was like like in
in in the first episode we see Lauren and Cameron
like get full on engaged. Who was the first girl
that came back that was like I'm getting engaged or
like was maybe like selling it like it was you?

(16:32):
It was with Damian, you were the first person that
came in. Then what was the reaction like from the
other girls? So after and you saw the episode after
like I opened up to him and I said you know,
I have my flaws, um, and he was like, I'll
take that, and I love you for it. I literally
ran out of the pods through my notebook on the ground,

(16:54):
came into the lounge crying and was like I've found
and all the girls just kind of like came over
me and like started giving me hugs and alright, bookmark
stop because we're going to save that for another episode,
so you gotta subscribe. We'll get to the rest of
that because that we're jumping ahead. So let's go to
Lauren and Cameron, because there are the two that get
engaged in this episode. Did you see that coming? How

(17:15):
soon did you know it was coming? So as soon
as Laurence started stopped going on dates with other people,
that's it. How okay? So did you ever go on
a date with Cameron? Yeah? What did you think of Cameron?
I thought he was such a calm, intellectual soul, and
I was able to talk to him about I guess,

(17:38):
like knowledge in a sense of how I ter how
I was interpreting signals with Damien or with you know,
what was going on in the Pods, and I was
going through like this period of self awareness while I
was in there, and he was really able to just
kind of like talk me down the ledge. I went
through an epiphany, um, and he just helped me kind
of like dissect it and make sure that it was

(18:00):
not a crazy thing that I was happening. But it
was just more of like the self awareness. That's so
you just that's a good little nugget there. Did you
ever talk to other guys about other guys? Yeah, like
trying to get dirt on them, like what and were
they cool with it, like doing recon tell me what
you think of this person kind of stuff. Did you
do that with all the guys about Damien? No? I
think they kind of so when I said I picked Damien, Um,

(18:25):
I think it's words kind of spread, and guys on
my next days were like, so I heard you picked
someone and I was like I did. And uh, Like
you wouldn't say to cam, hey, tell me about Damien
or Barnett, what can you tell me about Damian? Well,
they would be like, so I heard like you picked
someone and I was like yeah, he was like, well,
he's such a sweet guy. He's like all about you.
So they would just kind of innately tell me um,

(18:47):
And then I think the person that I confided in
with the most was Rory, where I was just like, hey, like,
tell me what's going on over there? Is this still?
You know? Am I feeling the same thing that he is?
And he was just very you're shying. So we saw
it an episode one and that is a perfect place
to take a break because when we return after this
short little message, Rory is going to join us. All right,

(19:18):
we're back on Love Insight and Love Insight. And remember
we asked for pod talk you our listeners, to submit
your questions you want answered on our official Love is
Blind podcast. This one comes from Casey. Hi. This is Casey.
First of all, huge fan of the show. But I
just have one thing to say. Justice for Rory. Where

(19:39):
is his edit? He was clearly the counselor everybody loved him.
He took such good care of everybody. Where is he
and all of this? I want to hear his story? Alright, Rory,
So let's get to know your number one? Why were
you a plan? Come on now, I've always treampt up
being a human and I just thought if I could
look like one, then eventually people would accept me for

(20:01):
not being planned. You know, you were you were all
over the first episode, and you were like the go
to for for everybody. G was just sharing with us
how she confided in you and stuff. So obviously everybody
thinks you were a plan. So kind of sure with
us how you got on the show, what you were
doing there, and why we only saw you for one episode. Um. Sure,
So I got on the show. The casting agents reached

(20:24):
out to me. I think towards the end of the process,
I was one of the last few contestants. Added, Um.
I think I only had like a month prior before
kind of going into the facility. Um, And then I
was there. You know. I I told them no a
couple of times, like two times, because I just it
just didn't seem like me. It was kind of radical
and kind of out there, and I was like, I
don't know if this is something I want to do,

(20:44):
but it just anytime I wanted to say no, I
kept being brought back to it. Right. I was like,
this is really interesting. I feel like I have to
do this just to see And you know, I was
single at the time. I'm single now, and it's like,
you know, if this is actually something that works out,
you know, even if it's a low chance whatever I mean,
then that's it, right, that's all that that's all that matters,
And so I kind of wanted to show it that way. Um.

(21:05):
And the reason that you know, I didn't get a
whole lot of airtime there, um was mostly just because
you know, you think about it Netflix as a publisher, Uh,
you only had ten episodes to work with, and that
had to you know, a company probably episodes worth of content.
So they had to make some tough choices on what
content they could show and whatnot. And it obviously it
made the most sense to focus on the people that

(21:26):
continued on, right, and the people that didn't didn't get
that didn't get that as much time. Right. Yeah, but
there was so much of you. That's what's so strange
about it. Like in the first episode, you are clearly
it seemed like, to some degree the alpha of the
of the male facility. Is that fair to say? It
seemed like you were sort of their leader. Um. I

(21:46):
don't know if we had a leader, but I was
definitely the I was the rock for for over and
half the cast. And that you know, when they when
they had some part of their you know, their psyche
kind of unveiled or they were confused or law ust
or overwhelmed or having a panic attack. Most of the time, Um,
I was the person that either I found them because
I could feel that they were having troubles, or they

(22:08):
found me. But it was just you know, it's like, hey,
I'm confused, this is a lot, um, can someone help
me process this? And that's kind of with the role
that I fell into. How did you handle that? And
this is g y hi hi you how did you
handle like all of our emotions plus the ones that
you were feeling with Danielle. So it wasn't easy, um,

(22:30):
And it it's something that kind of overwhelmed me quite
a lot throughout the process. I mean towards Danton I
was crying so much just because you know, I was
kind of trying to shoulder the burden of everybody because
I was really worried that, you know, you know, people
like Burnett or whatever, they we're gonna get close, but
they were gonna stumble on the last hurdle and then
not get where they wanted to go. And I was
really worried about that. Um. But you know, it's just

(22:51):
it's always been my style to kind of just be
the natural leader, the one who make sure that no
man left behind or no woman left behind kind of things.
It was hard, It was very stressful. Um. It took
a lot out of me, as it did everybody else
on the cast. But you know, it was more important
to me that everyone made it. Who is Danielle and
what happened? So Danyelle, she was the first pot I

(23:12):
went into on the first day UM, and we had
an instant connection and so we were kind of we
were each other's number one throughout the whole ten day process.
And she actually ended up vibing a lot with another contestant, Matt,
not Barnett, but Matt, Matt Thomas, who we were actually
best friends in the show. We were really close the
whole the whole way through UM, and I think that

(23:33):
she just she was kind of deciding between us, and
when I proposed, she said yes, But you know, as
when we got engaged, when were fancis after the show,
because we didn't get followed by cameras afterwards. UM, that
actually kind of dissolved about a week or two after
and she wented up going to date with Matt. So
did you propose to her because you thought Matt might
beat you to it? See. Uh, so it's not actually

(23:58):
it's my baby, Um, she wants to Um. I I
am a little atypical on that way. And then I've
never really wanted to be part of the whole fighting
for affection um process, because at the end of the day,
to me, it's it's two people there, right. It's not
like Danielle is a security camera looking left or right

(24:19):
and we have to force it to turn one way. Right, Like,
she's a person that has feelings and a decision that
she can make. So it's like I've always been in
the camp of let me shoot my shot, and if
it works, it works. If it doesn't, it doesn't. I'm
not gonna worry too much about trying to convince someone, right, Um,
I propose because I was ready. You know. It's one
of those things were like we had this great connection
and I was ready to kind of settle down and
do all that. So for me on my side, it

(24:40):
was just let's do this. Did Matt ever open up
to you and say, hey, like I want to be
with Danielle. No, So he was pretty quiet about it
most of the time. UM. And I think a couple
of the guys were, you know, like people talk about
how Cameron Lauren were so perfect, but most of the
time they were really quiet, especially Cameron on the on
the guy side, he didn't talk much about her. So

(25:00):
some of the guys played their emotions close to the
chest on who they were really connecting with. And I
didn't know about Matt until probably like day nine as
far as like the fact that he was that that
into Danielle. Did you, um it seemed like you maybe
played a little bit of peacemaker with Mark and Barnett
with the Jessica thing. Did that get a little like

(25:20):
weird on the guy's side, because it seemed like that
was maybe the one that that was sort of a crossover. UM. So,
Matt and Sorry, Barnett and Mark were probably the biggest tussle,
and then Matt and I were definitely going over Danielle.
And then Taylor kind of got involved in um and
and g can attest this too, but involved in the

(25:40):
gan Nina triangle with Damien, and then also Taylor was
also pretty involved with Jessica as well. So I think
that was kind of like the big question is like
where everyone was gonna land, And I think that's why
I ended up with so many scenes with Barnett is
that he was kind of tussling with the thought of like,
who who am I supposed to pick? Here? Who am
I actually feeling? What is uh, you know, like a

(26:03):
fling and what's actually real? And he's trying to process
through all that. I think that's kind of expected, right,
Like if you get fifteen people on each side together
for ten days and say, hey, you know, we're some
of us are making connections, some aren't make the decision.
I think there was definitely, you know, some fighting, and
I think it was fine until the very end, and
you can actually feel the energy on the day nine,

(26:25):
day ten, a lot of us were kind of playing quiet,
playing coast the chest as it was starting to get
a little bit more competitive. Why, um, you you mentioned
you proposed you got engaged to Danielle, So why did
we not see you? You mentioned you know, and you've
got three episodes worth for ten But what do you
think led to you not going as one of the
six couples that did get to go. That's the the

(26:48):
eternal question, I think, um, because obviously myself and Danielle
got engaged, and then two others Wesley and Lexie got engaged,
and so they had basically set up for I have
couples bandwidth wise, right, so the the amount of uh,
you know, they have to have cameras for everybody, they
have to have I mean, it's just a huge budget, right, um.

(27:08):
And so they kind of had to pick and choose
which couples they thought we're going to be the ones,
and you know, you don't always have an answer there,
so I kind of have empathy for them in that
decision process of who do we cut, who do we not.
The fact that Daniel and I didn't last long outside
of it tells me that maybe they saw that she
was having a better connection with Matt. Because you think
about it as a contestant on the show, you only

(27:30):
get to see your dates, right, You don't know what's
going on any of the other dates, and so you
don't know how connected they are or how they're like,
what kind of bond they have. And so I was like,
maybe they saw something I didn't. So do you think
that if they would have picked you, as you know,
some of the final couples, you would have ended up
marrying Daniale. I don't know. It's a great question. I

(27:52):
don't have an answer for that, because she's the one
that broke it off when we left the show, So
it's it wasn't you know. It's one of those things
like it's it's hard to say to have to ask her,
So it almost it almost feels like a college athlete

(28:13):
where you're you're in college and you get everything taken
care of, right, they walk you to class, you you
get all your meals, they take care of your washing,
your clothes, and then all of a sudden, you graduate
and you just pluck you get spit out if you
don't get drafted, and you almost don't know what to do.
You're just kind of walking in circles? Is that almost
what this was? Like? They just kind of spit you
out into the world and the two of you were engaged,
But did you like nowhere to go? Did you guys

(28:35):
hang out like what happens when you don't go to
Mexico but you're now engaged? Yeah, I think it's it's
it's more intense than that because the pod experience was
was really profound, and I spent you know, about the
year since just really like journaling a lot and and
kind of trying to figure out what the heck just
happened to us. And you know, Jenny might be able

(28:56):
to test to this, but I think everyone had a
very major shift inside themselves that was really hard to understand.
So you have that on top of the fact that
you know, we just got spit out and let go
and they kind of just gave us our phones back
and then we were just back in the real world
and it was almost like this you know, different reality
where you don't you know, there was a hurricane that
was going on during the filming, and we didn't know

(29:18):
because we had no TVs, no radio, no phones, right,
we were just on this island, living life somewhere, um
and so it was it was kind of shocking. And
I had budgeted time, um for you know, if I
did get engaged or if I didn't, and I just
you know, when we got back, it was we just
needed to go somewhere. I think that's why the next
trip was so valuable for the couples, is that kind

(29:39):
of having that time to just recharge after it was important.
So Danielle and I ended up going to We took
the same day trip to Miami and we just stayed
there for like four or five days, sitting on the
beach and going out at nine and just kind of
you know, getting back into real life human being form.
You know, so going back to like that time frame
that you were journaling NG and um, you know, you're

(30:02):
trying to figure out what happened within us. I know
we've talked about this a couple of times, but I
feel like in the pods that became the philosopher right
where I was trying to just dissect everything and figure
out like what is happening, um, you know, mentally, spiritually,
And I feel like we need to come up with
a term for this rory because seriously, like that whole

(30:24):
I mean, I had epiphanies. I told you about this,
so it's just like the stars were aligning. What did
you Did you come up with anything or did you
come through like a breakthrough of like what it is
that we went through? Yeah, so there you know into
this in my other interview. But I think that there's
a in the simplest terms that I can muster and

(30:47):
the simplest way I can put it, I think that
there was like two or three major processes going on,
I think, you know, and there's a lot of ingredients
that had to be present for this, you know, wakening
to happen and all of us. The first was that
I think every single person that went to the facility
wanted to find someone, right. There was a drive there

(31:08):
to not be alone, not to be single, and to
find your person, to find your partner in crime. And
so that was the carret on the stick that we
were all kind of fighting for is like, you know, okay,
we do actually want this um. And what happens is
when you're in that facility, right and you actually take
away your phone, you're any distractions, pets, work responsibilities. We

(31:29):
all took time off from work and we had nowhere
to go, nowhere to be. No one relied on us
for anything. You're sitting in that silence and you start
to be able to tune into the parts of you
that you ignore right the way you're feeling, the way
you're thinking. And the longer you sit in that silence,
you get to a point where you can't really run

(31:50):
from it anymore. There's no Just like normally, I think
this happens on a day to day basis for almost
every person on the planet. Where you start to feel uncomfortable,
or you feel anxious, or you feel worried. You go
to social media, or you turn on Netflix, or you
go out for the It's very easy to distract yourself
seven because there's a million different ways to do it.

(32:11):
And so when we ever had that feeling of I
don't feel good, something's wrong inside of me, you distract
yourself instead of dealing with it. And I think what
happened to most of us is we couldn't distract ourselves anymore,
and we had to just sit there and stare at
them and lokay, I'm feeling this way or I'm feeling
that way. What's going on? Oh my god, I can't
run from it. Um. And so I think as time
went on, we all started succumbing to that, some of us,

(32:31):
you know, I didn't realize what was happening until later
or after, or maybe talking to other people and seeing
that they were going to the same thing helped. But
it was just this. You had the camaraderie of your
same gender lounge, right. The girls had the girls to
lean on and the guys had the guys to lean on.
And you kept going to the dates where you're with
someone on the other side of the wall that is
opening up to the same level you are, and it's

(32:52):
almost like this rally right in sports, where you just
like you toss it over by being vulnerable and they
get vulnerable back, and you keep tossing back and forth,
and eventually you're just hearing and feeling things that you
didn't even realize. We're part of you. And there's also
you know, there's a good deal amount of posturing that
happen in real life. Right, So when you're in a
professional setting, you're standing up taller, and you're working on

(33:15):
your addiction and your vocabulary. You're trying to say the
right things or use the right words. You're when you
go to a restaurant, you make sure you're sitting properly
or you pick the right table. There's always some array
of things that you're trying to nail that are socially
acceptable and social pressures that are coming down on you.
But when you're in a sound proof booth by yourself
with nothing going on, you don't worry about that. A

(33:36):
lot of us ended up laying on the couch, you're
leaning up against the wall or sitting on the floor,
and you start to listen to yourself as you're connecting
with someone, and you start to realize that you're part
of the conversation too. And I don't think a lot
of people have this nowadays where you're talking to someone
and you're kind of thinking about what you're going to
say next, or where you're sitting or what you're doing,

(33:57):
and you're not even listening to how that person is
affecting you emotionally and mentally. Right, and since you start
tuning into that, you really start connecting to them. You're like,
holy crap, what she just said makes sense to me
or oh my god, that makes me smile or that
makes me laugh. Right, So I feel like, yeah, it's
like this real life. It's almost like it's almost like
you get to realign with the person you've always wanted

(34:18):
to be. Right, It's like you see the deviations that
you've made over time for social pressures. But when that
fades away, you can say, oh my god, I actually
really do. I think a lot of us change jobs
after it were like remember what I wanted? Yeah, yeah,
you realign yourself because you don't have the distractions that
prevent you from doing that. But is it also it's
it's interesting here and then now I understand why so

(34:38):
many people talk to Roy because we can just sit
and listen to him speaking from five. It's the longest
answer to a question ever, but it's it's fascinating cause
I almost wonder if is it your true self or
are you manufacturing something? Because you're in this experiment, it's
not the real world. There there are always outside influences
that are going to be exerted upon you. So it's
almost like you're an alternate form of your cell in

(35:00):
a controlled environment that you'll probably never experience again. Right
I for me, sorry, are you can answer this too?
But for me, it was like I was my innate self.
I was the self that I am in a closed
room when no one's looking at me, when the things
that I think in my head without any outside pressure judgment,
Like I went back to my poetic my poems and

(35:23):
my written word. And that's why people are like you
spoken riddles, It's because that's how I talk in my head.
So I think that's how that that came across physically,
because I was my innate true self and I didn't
have anything to distract me from that. I don't about
you you as well, Roy, No, So I think I

(35:44):
think it's actually the reverse question. Yeah, Um, I think
it's actually the reverse, because it was a controlled environment.
But I think it's because it was free of pressures,
you were able to kind of allow yourself to feel.
And you know, it's twenty four hours a day, right,
so as soon as you have a breakthrough or a
wall comes down, or you have some vulnerability, you kind

(36:06):
of that's the new baseline, right, you don't get the
chance to reset. And so I could definitely see the
impression of you know, it's it's it's obviously an island
that can't be real. But I mean, I think, like
use as an example, right, so like when I go
and do business in Japan, I'm going to you know,
like wear a button down and tuck it in and
wear a belt because that's culturally acceptable right there. Like

(36:27):
that's how you envelope yourself in the culture. And I
think the problem with nowadays is every single part of
your life is something that's being measured, right your Instagram post,
your social media, how you have your home, what you
eat for dinner, when you go to bed, when you
wake up, how many times you go to the gym, right, Like,
all that's being measured all the time. And I think
because you're so you getting to this point where you're

(36:49):
just like a ball of rubber bands just tightly wound.
You're not sure what's going on where in this experiment,
no one was expecting you to do anything. You're just
there existing, being yourself, right, And so I think it
is obviously you can't be that all the time because
you know, when you go to a business meeting or
you go to a restaurant or whatever, there are expectations

(37:10):
of you as a person in those scenarios. But I
think that if you if you string too many of
those scenarios together where you never have a moment to
stop and remember who you are, you forget doesn't make
it a challenge you think for the relationship on when
when you re enter the world that we have to
live in, because it's nothing like the world in which
you fell in love and got engaged, I would assume

(37:31):
that's that's a hell of a challenge for that relationship
to to continue. Totally. Yeah, and I think that's kind
of I mean, you nailed the premise of the show
too and why it was interesting to watch. And obviously
since Janina went on, she can probably you know, speak
more to this, but just I think that I have
to believe that what love is blind was trying to
figure out is why people aren't connecting as much anymore.

(37:56):
Why does everyone on every dating app but hating it,
hating themselves and finding no one right? Like, why is
that such a challenge now? Whereas you know, fifty years
ago and the nuclear family era, you met your home
girl in your hometown and you were married after high
school and everything was great forever, right, It's like, what change?
What made that so much more difficult? And I think
that this this show has shown and proven that it

(38:21):
if you if you can never be vulnerable with anyone
because you're always afraid or you're worried that you're gonna
come off wrong, you're never gonna make that deep emotional connection.
And once that connections made, yes, you're gonna have to
posture with each other's families or out in the real world,
or you're gonna have times where you're fighting and arguing. Yes,
that's part of it. But I think that if you
don't have the underlying foundation of why you like each

(38:44):
other and why you admire each other, then it's not
going to survive anyway. So if if you're trying if
you reinsert yourself into the into the world, like you
said you're going to Japan for business and stuff, how
much of how much of the rory that you had
on the inside still exists now eighteen months later? Um,
most of it now? Obviously you know some of the

(39:04):
topics that we're talking about here, and I've had some
interviews where you know, people are like, wait, what and
it just feels heavy. I I obviously minimize that in
casual conversation because I'm not going to just drop bombs
everywhere I go. But it is still there. And I
think that, you know, dates since the show have been
so much easier, right because it's I can tell when

(39:25):
we're not having pod talk, and I don't like it
when it's not pot talk. It's like, hey, what college
did you go to? What car do you drive? Right?
What's your favorite shirt? Meaningless? And the pot talk is
like no, like you know, like what does sex mean
to you? Do you like childhood memories? How do you
feel about your mom? How do you feel about your dad?

(39:46):
Like what happened with your last relationship? Like things that
you're scared to ask because you're scared about like scaring
them away in normal conversation, you realize that you know,
And that's what's so great about the pods is you
would be vulnerable and stay like, Okay, today we're gonna
talk about X. And you don't really want to bring
that up on a first date normally, but hey, we
should probably talk about it. And then you realize that
when you bring it up and you talk about it,

(40:07):
you both feel better afterwards because you were willing to
have that short term conflict to talk about something serious
that led to long term bonding. What was the longest
you spent in a pod? And what was this? Because
I've been guessing you had to have a marathon. And
what was the shortest amount of time you had in
a pod? The first day we did speed dating, and
they believe those were fifteen minutes each, but you had

(40:28):
to see all fifteen people the whole day, so it
kind of was like back and forth, back and forth.
I thought it was seven was it seven minutes? Seven minutes?
And then the second date was and did you do
like a ten hour marathon? No? I mean I think
the longest one I was in was like two and

(40:48):
a half hours or three hours. I don't know what
I feel like I was in there for like eight hours, dude,
But you said every fifteen minutes felt like a year,
right I. So last thing for me, right is like
I feel like I was in there for a year.
After the nine days, there was this weird time dilation
where you just don't know how much time has passed.
And some of that it's like we don't we have

(41:11):
We weren't seeing clocks or phones or TVs or like
we just you know, or sunlight or anything. And I
think partially too, when you're going through some really intense
emotional baggage and you're kind of processing that and going
through it, it can definitely make time feel like it's
going longer. And it's also just you know, you see

(41:31):
what we saw on the show and the final edit,
but it's not like everyone had one, you know, love
interest and that was it. It's like we were making
connections and losing them constantly. So there's a lot to
think about as you're going through this all. Right, before
we get into time space, continuums and time as a
flat circle, let's get let's get one thing. We we
do this with everyone, Roy, So we want you to

(41:53):
play love is Blind or Hard Pass and I'm gonna
go through six things, and you can only pass one
for things you are looking for in a partner. So
remember you can only do one pass and and that's it.
So I'm gonna read all six and then you will
give us the one that you will give the hard pass,
or I'm gonna go one at a time, one at
a time. Here we go, laughs like Janice from Friends.

(42:16):
Oh man, all right, love is blind? Alright, here we
go owns, snakes or reptiles. Love is blind? Okay. Uh?
Tons of debt like b K level debt? Oh, I
mean how many? How many digits are we talking? Uh,

(42:39):
let's say, let's say mid five digits. That's bad. Love
is blind. There we go. Uh, someone who wants to
be in an open relationship? Oh pass, Okay, and there
it is, so the the other ones I have left,
and I'll let you change if you want. Uh bad

(42:59):
in bed? Who but that that's a skill thing like
we can practice there. Okay, exactly right. And then finally,
girls with hairy armpits like, but but she won't she
won't like is it? Like? So like if she's wearing
a sun dresses it peeking out, it's like yours Roy,

(43:21):
they look like yours. They're they're full of I don't
all right, So it looks like open relationships seemed to
be the right answer there. Uh, Roy, this was fantastic.
It is. It is certainly easy through just the short
conversation we had why you were featured in the manner

(43:41):
you were in the first episode and everybody was confiding
in you and you were talking them through. Uh, like
you said, what was I'm certain, I'm certain was a
wild and different emotional set of feelings and experiences that
I've got to believe are just crazy. Over those nine days,
the heart of the pod squadroar, there we go, all
the squad. Is that what you call yourself? Thank you, Roy,

(44:06):
Thank you so much. Subscribe to Love Insight on I
Heart Radio or however you get your podcasts.