October 16, 2025 • 49 mins
Welcome back, or for first-timers, welcome!! To Season TWO of MESS. This week, Sydnee and Marie have a very special, jam-packed, MESSY episode for you. The two catch you Messties up on Marie's birthday extravaganza and the London trip of a lifetime.
Don’t forget to write in your messy stories at messthepodcast@gmail.com, or call in at (763) 280-6588 to have your MESSages read live on air!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Listening to mess Okay, second season whoa strong coming in?
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Chaotic and strong? Yeah, girl, tell them what happened?
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Well, you know, I'm more late than usual dealing with
a I don't even know if I want to.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Know if it's a bug or someone put a hex.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
On me, or it could just you know, taking five
hour energy shots.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
You know, a couple of days in a row. It
could have been that.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
So you're sick, Yeah, you did your I tried to
do a little wand situation.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Girl, Yours never looked better. I don't.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
I am now what you're sick and you're laying in
bed is the wig in the bed.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Free?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
I know you've been waiting for me, but take it
easy on me.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I know you've been waiting.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
Yes, I have been waiting, but your hell looks so great.
It don't look like sick girl.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Hair. It was in the bed with me as well.
So you got out the bed and did your hair.
I got in the car.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
I did I have nausea pills with me. I've just
I haven't been able to hold anything down.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
Yeah, so I hold you down. Well, I'm here to
hold you down for the pod. If anybody, if anybody's nauseous.
How got you? You've already taken five of these? Yes, girl?
How many? Like? Well, how does it work? How many
milligrams is this?
Speaker 3 (01:28):
I don't know, but it's just I've just been throwing
up since yesterday, and I had a podcast yesterday with
Stravo's in All the Way Boondocks Queens? Did you throw
up in Queens? I threw up before Queen's and then
violently after.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Well, yeah, queens would make me sick. To musta makes well,
no shade to the Queen's girls. Queens gets it.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
I used to be on Jamaica Avenue with y'all, so
well we have.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
We have video now, full video, So yeah, they should
get to see you and all your glory.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
They should see me in a good with my good bang.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
Yes, I am not sick, but my hair looks it
No that this is actually coming out today.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
It looks so good. Yeah, No, I don't.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
I just I can't scratch my scalp properly. It's gotta go.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
I thought you were taking it out already. I was planning,
but I was like, but what am I gonna? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (02:21):
You know, I had stuff to do and I haven't
made a single appointment, But I am gonna go look
at some hair today. So okay, you're looking at some
hair that, yeah, I'm gonna buy it. Okay, Okay, I'm
gonna buy some bundles today.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
All right, if all goes.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Well, everything is going well, Okay, you can there's no
way that you can be unwell as unwell as I am.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
You're you're doing great.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
So we should should we unpack how you're sick or
what got you sick?
Speaker 2 (02:49):
We we are here about you.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Okay, this was the emergency episode because so much has transpired, so.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Much has happened. Yes, wow, thank you for keeping me
on task.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Don't want to bore them with my foolishness. Let's get
into it, okay, right, we had a birthday bash.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
She was phenomenal.
Speaker 1 (03:05):
We had a birthday party. The Mullet was there, and yeah,
I had a good time. I don't think that I
was as lit as I wanted to be, but everybody
around me seemed to be either pretty high or pretty drunk.
Speaker 3 (03:18):
No wait, hold on, wait, what do you mean you
weren't as high or lit as you would want to be.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
I feel like I was pretty sober at my birthday. Actually,
I think I had like two drinks.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
I lost one of them.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
When you bought the cake out, I gave it to
a girl and then after I blew the blunt candle out,
I was like, where's my drink? And literally when the
photographer sent me to photos, I went back and I
was looking at I have the glass here, here, it
is in this other girl's hand.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
And then I never saw the glass again. So that okay.
But yeah, I don't know. I feel good.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
I think birthdays are supposed to be are supposed to be,
you know, the day that you do what makes you
feel good and you're.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
Around people who are you happy.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Absolutely, somebody did ask Amina, why was I not invited
to maurice fortieth?
Speaker 2 (04:07):
And I mean it said what she said? What she said, Well,
she had she had a party, so it must have
been her fortieth. And I said, whoa, who hate you?
Speaker 1 (04:17):
I said, well, first of all, you skip so many
decades to land.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
There is hate speech.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
Yes, so holy, I mean jeezuise that a gal can't
have a party, can't have a blast.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, I mean it was like, well we went to
Morocco for Herberday last year.
Speaker 4 (04:33):
Exactly, and no one said anything about that.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
That ten days would have been like you must be
forty days, right.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Nobody said that.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Nobody said but I have a little party with a
light up floor, and people are like, she got an
ARP card, it must be And.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
You know they tried to get me on there, you know, yeah,
the scammers. They try to get me on AARP and
I don't belong there either, so it's no nice. It's
no nice.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
So next year I'm going to have an even bigger party,
and so I'm gonna think I'm fifty.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
So yeah, I love that. Yeah, yeah, you can't go wrong.
Yeah yeah, yeah. Hopefully I'll have like a big sexy
loft or something. I'll have it at my house.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Listen, friends, we're putting it. It's in the universe again.
We have to get merch that's God's favorite and in parentheses,
just Marie. No, everything works out for you and you
will have that loft.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
There's already a brand it's called God's.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Favorite, I know, but this one is in parentheses, just Marie.
So people have all these God's favorites out there, but
you truly truly top five.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Well let's talk about it.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Because you know, I went to London and I said,
I like this trip.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
It's gonna be like a really great trip, you.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Know, Yes, I said, I always have a good time
when I go. I know I'm gonna have a great time.
Any a better time. So I stayed in a different hotel,
but like same block that I always stay on. And
when I got to the hotel, they oh, first of all,
from the beginning of the trip, everything was looking real
good for me. Yes, the box that I was waiting
(06:09):
on with my clothes got delivered before I had to
leave my house.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Right before nicked. Time missed in the natime.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
I left my house late, got to the airport, went
through security in literally ten minutes. I mean, when do
you not you have pre check? You what I had,
But you know, preachers were in priority.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
PreCheck closes after a certain time at the airport. Who
knew who? That's a mess.
Speaker 4 (06:30):
Let's go tsa pre check.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
What y'all gotta do, what y'all gotta do on any
day that isn't a day that pre check works, Like,
if it's open, it should be open twenty four hours.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
I believe.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
It really didn't make any sense, but they were there
when I got there. My driver was very slow. I
did ask him to step on it, and I think
he slowed down. He was like, because I couldn't check
in on my phone, so I had to check in
at the desk. Oh, I had to drop a bag. Okay,
so that's where the drama lies. So I was scared,
but I made it. And then I got to the gate.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
I said, is it the full flight because.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
I was in the middle seat, and they were like, no,
it's not fulk and they bumped me up to the
road that had no seats in front of it, and
I said.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Okay, come on, we are getting these T shirts.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Just Marie. Okay, I feel like you want God's face.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Oh no, no, this is I've honestly, I've had food
poisoning so many times.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
Yeah, this is not food poisoning.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
I'm positive that this is in food poisoning because food
poison poisoning I'm able to shake.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
I went to the beach. I went to the beach
with food poisoning.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
I was throwing up out of my mouth and my
button and I still managed to go to the beach
with y'all in to loom and this is something completely different.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
So what we think it is.
Speaker 3 (07:52):
My body is fully rejecting everything anything, and the reason
why I was taking five hour energy energy shots because
once you get to the point of sobriety, you're like,
what is so close to cocaine but not cocaine. That
just feels like, oh, I'll be able to sleep at
night knowing that I didn't relapse.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
And that was what a five hour shot was. For
my five hour energy you feel like cocaine.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
I want the feeling of like being able to be
up and doing things without the feeling of cocaine. Yeah,
without feeling like crackera, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So, yeah, I took those.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
It started when I was in Vegas because I was like, oh,
living Lavi the Vegas, I'm gonna have these late spots.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I don't understand so much judgment coming from the mullet.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Oh, so much judgment from the bang.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Yeah, let me. The bank is doing a weird thing.
I'm trying to spit it shut part it down the middle.
Then please don't Marie.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
I Yeah, I cannot.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Listen, y'all, not even a stringy bang.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Oh listen. And that was me when I was in
the club back in the day.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Oh went so the.
Speaker 4 (09:08):
Pictures of you in the shower, Oh yes, When I.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Was like, you know, what if I just swoop it
all the way to the to the side, you won't
notice that this was actually a blunt NICKI minaj bang
the whole time.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Oh you just chopped it? Did you cut it yourself? No, Now,
don't blame me like that. I don't know. Day I
was not diy at that. If you watched a YouTube
tutorio eleven, I was.
Speaker 3 (09:32):
Like, somebody else will do it. I went all the
way to Long Island and got my hair done. I
would get a sewing at that time, so really good
hair quality sewins. Obviously I was able to be in
the showers in Pashita, so yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
Anyway, so I landed and they don't give me no stamp.
I feel like some of these counfries don't give stamps
no more. In the passport girl, you live there, Why
would they give you a stamp when you're basically a resident.
The last time I went, they gave me a stamp
because I did six shows, So I guess you would
be like, I'm here for work. They didn't even nobody
asked me no question. Somebody said where are you going
(10:07):
to be? I mean maybe I.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Just skipped customs completely. Nobody spoke to me. No, that's
when you come back. They also when I came back, they.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
Didn't ask they didn't ask me nothing. I was like,
do I have Global entry? I walked through so fast.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
I was like, I think I have a stamp from
when I went to London last time.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Yeah, last time they stamped me. This time nobody even
touched my passport.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
But they said the stamps are out now they're not
going to be doing that. That's it's all going to
be in the system and the pages. Yeah, that's done. Sis,
you might as well just get the passport card. Okay,
so now you touch down in London.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
I took a card to my hotel. Of course, it
takes an hour and change.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Oh. I bumped into Jake Cornell. Oh, yes, he was
doing right.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
I bumped into him. He's flight left an hour before me.
My flight landed an hour early. I don't know how,
but we landed an hour early, and me and him
were walking out to get a cab at the same time.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
God's favorite Jess Marie, that's the time.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Because I swear to God, we jumped on a jet
stream or something. I don't know, but like, I was like, oh,
we teleported and our early is crazy.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
Never heard of that, not going to London and that
usually it's like late at least like twenty five.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Nope, girl, we left on time. We got there an
hour early. So my hotel I get there, they're like, oh,
your room is not ready. It's like one. It's like
one fifteen. They're like, it'll be ready bout three.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
I was like three, So what am I supposed to
do until that time? They were like, well, you know,
you get something to eat. There's a bar here.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Like I was like all right, So I left my
bags with them. I went across the street. I went
and got something to eat. Right, I had a I
don't even remember what I ate.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I come back. Room is ready.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
I'm upstairs, right before after I take a shower, right
before I take a nap.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
I'm like, let me jump on hinge. See what hinge talking? Hey?
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Because I said, bitch, we don't give a fuck about
you ate, We don't care about the lobby, we don't
care about your sheets.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
What is up? Give us why we're here? Right?
Speaker 1 (12:00):
So this guy, I had changed my location to London
a week before the trip.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
You got to be ahead of it. You got ahead
of it because it.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Filters out kind of riff raft that first couple of days,
and then when you get to the nitty gritty, that's
when people you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (12:14):
So you're king, your prince, your highness.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Your highness, my lord. So this guy really nice smile.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Here, I'll show you because I don't think you saw
his profile, but no, you sent me a picture of No,
I think you sent me pictures from his profile.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
Okay boom so Sidney profile. Yeah, so you can show
me again so I can get afresh. You need to
see how I was like.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Oh, yeah, so this is that's what he looks like.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Nice smile. You know he's given AI hey girls a
good fucking photo.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
That's why the photo is first, like hey, uh, if
you're if you're look.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
At that arm, mom, Now I know those are stamped.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
Those arms are stamp baby, good god, those arms stamped.
My past. Does he work out with your sister? Girl?
I don't know who he is.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
He's in overalls the yeah, anyway, I got cavs.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Is he a soccer player? Probably? Bitch? This is good,
very nice. So for the videos.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
So uh, he he's like, hey, if you're free tonight
or tomorrow and you want to go see some jazz.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
We can go to this place, in this place I
love that.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Jazz in London jazz jazz, jez jazz.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
Or or it could be Love Jones. Boom boom boom
boom boom boom Brother to the Night. Is that alright?
You remember that? No, that's fine.
Speaker 4 (13:45):
Anybody who knows the movie knows what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Is that alright? Yeah? I think I just saw that
movie for the first time this year. Did you like it?
I don't remember the movie really. He actually kind of
looks like joking.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Okay, okay, anyway, so I say yeah, I said, yeah,
let's go.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Let's do tonight. Mind you already had plans for that night.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
I was gonna go see music with an with another friend,
but I was like, yeah, I can probably do too
much music.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
Never hurt nobody. So yeah, then I went to sleep.
I went to sleep. I woke up.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
I had two dates booked for that night. You have
to rest, right, I mean, I was tired, just fluid,
you know.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
I slept for like an hour.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Hang out with my friend that and he's texting me, Hey,
what time are we meeting? I get to the place
I don't have no service for whatever reason.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
When he was texting me.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Wait, you don't have any service because your phone is
still No I had so.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
I had service the whole time I was in London,
but while he was waiting for me at the place,
I didn't have I Haday.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Sis, you had service, but your with your bubbles were green?
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Yeah, Sis, I had service for uh what's that Google
map and social media can't Yeah, your.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Bubbles were green. Somebody was like, did Marie getting android?
I did not.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
That was almost as hurtful as somebody calling me, you know,
a woman of a particularly age. So anyway, I meet him.
He's sitting like right at the bottom front of the stage.
I was like, oh, that's aggressive.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
But we had a good time. He was cute, he
smelled good. The arms was arm in.
Speaker 3 (15:21):
Yeah, no, I saw, I see, I see it. It's
I mean, I think those greeted you first.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
It was definitely his teeth he had. Really, he is
really nice teeth. Damn smile might be nicer than mine
like that.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
No, I don't believe that that's how they are nice.
I think it goes with the whole face and pack.
But you have an amazing amazing smile. So no one's
better than yours.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
Girl.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
The place that we went to see jazz was like
around the corner from our hotel. I was like, do
you want to take a walk and he was like,
uh yeah. He said, well, let's just get my car.
I was like, but it's literally it said, it's a
four minute walk or a five minute drive. And he
was like, no, let's get my car. Okay, you know
the car is good.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Somebody's like, I need you to get to see my
heart to get my good car.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
So great, Okay, we get to the car. A little
jag you know, little, yeah, Jack, little? I said, ohas
in a while is the classic. Of course, I walked
to the wrong side of the car. He's like, no, no, no,
is this sign. You've never been in a jag before? No,
I've never been in English Jack, Okay.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
It was giving James Bond kind of sort of you okay,
it's kind of sexy.
Speaker 2 (16:25):
Actually.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
The music his music cuts on Sidney the first of all.
The song that was playing was called.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Pussy Reaper, Stop It, Stop it. Have you heard of
this pussy Reaper?
Speaker 4 (16:38):
I said, what holds on people?
Speaker 2 (16:41):
The name of the artist's toxic chemistry. I said, is.
Speaker 3 (16:45):
This we might that actually might need to be the
title that might need to be.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Sick Chemistry is the name of the song? Okay? Wait?
Speaker 1 (16:56):
No, that that because I was like he reapers Reaper,
coochie Reaper.
Speaker 4 (17:01):
Sorry, because I was like, that's I'm the.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Coochie Reaper that. I was like, what, I don't like that?
I said, what is this song?
Speaker 1 (17:08):
But that's what was playing for the five minutes that
it took for us to drive back to the hotel.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Okay, here we go. Do you find you found couchie Reaper?
That's the intro.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Girl, You need to tell me that on the phone.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Girl, because that was playing that on the phone.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
I was like what it was like funny, but I
was like, what is happening? Cool? The couchie Reaper loud? No, no,
(18:04):
wait sound wait.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
Toxic Chemistry is definitely, It's definitely the title for sure.
Cucie Reaper is insane. That would be an ick for.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
Me because that it did give it a little.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Ick, that couchie reaper. Couchie Reaper. How many if you
say kouchie reaper in the mirror three times does he
pop up? I don't know.
Speaker 4 (18:26):
I'm a try okay, keep going, keep going.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
So that's what's playing.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
We gets back to my hotel room and you know,
like we're making out and.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
What he tastes like? What he tastes like? He tasted
like beans and toasts. Shut the fuck up, you're a lie.
What kind of drink did he have? He had? I
think he had a margarita.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Now that's also an ick jazz and margarita's.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Don't go really, yeah, I would think like an old
fashion maybe you know Maker's Mark Manhattan.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
No, I think I think it was a margarita. It
was like a certain type of margarita. But I think
it was it might have been a messice margarit.
Speaker 3 (19:08):
Oh mescal, because you know what that unlocks.
Speaker 2 (19:11):
So I'm like, this is this your sex playlist? Now?
Is this medicine? Girl? Is this your sex playlist? We
in the car cackling. We get upstairs.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
I have a speaker with me. I said, put your
sex playlist on. That's the song that the Toxic Chemistry
is topy its is playing while we're in the room.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
I'm in my head about it.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
I'm like, this is weird, this is weird, this is
this is weird, guys. I don't know if anybody's listening,
but guys, specifically straight men.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
Cuchi Reaper is an ick and it's mess. Yeah, it's
funny for us, that's.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
Funny as comedy, but like just linguistically, Cuchi Reaper is
because Cucci is gross in terms of if somebody is like,
what that Kuchi do?
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Like, I don't want to hear she is classier than
poo pussy. Pussy Reaper is worse. Pucie Reaper feels like, Okay,
this person, they don't curse in front of their mom.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
You know what, You're right, You're right because because I
don't want to actually, I don't want to hear that.
I don't want to hear the P word, and I
don't want to hear koochie when we're having.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
Sex, but like, use the other word, use your words, like, oh,
you don't want to hear kouchie?
Speaker 2 (20:25):
What word do you want to hear when you're having sex?
Is it mine? It's wet?
Speaker 1 (20:29):
It's sorry, I apologize, this is this is this is
a lot apology.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Apologies.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
Sorry, sorry dad, Okay, forget about next. So okay, So
y'all kisses, get hot and happy.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
I said, do you have a condom. He does not,
I don't. What do I look like? What do you mean?
What do you look like? You look like a woman
on the go right exactly?
Speaker 3 (20:52):
You're you sound like a woman who's who would put
your pussy first.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
Yes, but if I don't have condoms, then I can't
have sex with you, and I love that. For me,
it's kind of like but like if you got him,
it's like, ah, unless see what happens. But I don't
travel with them.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
I don't have them. I've never bought condoms in my life.
Speaker 4 (21:09):
You're a liar me.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
I've never purchased the condom in my life. Why not?
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Because if you're the man, you should have them. That's
shad that should be in your tool kid.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
Yes, but sometimes we got to take the power back
and have the one hundred.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I get that, but I'm just saying it's not I'm
not sitting at the Jones in that way.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Okay, they not falling up my.
Speaker 4 (21:28):
Purse, all right?
Speaker 2 (21:29):
So she don't have no condoms.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
So but now we got to go find something, but
not you on the journey now for the condom, making
our way downtown and were walking on the wrong side
of the street.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
Of course, but he's like, I got them at my house.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
I said, oh, he said, by the time when we
get him at the store, we could have already been
at my house.
Speaker 4 (21:44):
I said, oh girl, now this is another thing.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
He got to show you the car, he got to
show you the house. That's how that's how flexing goes.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Okay, oh we're back in. Let's go back then, So
sitting in the car, don't touch nothing. Sit in the
car and don't touch nothing either we live and or
see you tomorrow. Okay, well girl, we loved Okay, I
got to the house, nice clean, watch or dryer townhouse,
he got the whole whatever.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
And it's just him. Of course he's a grown up.
He's the coochie reaper. You can't reaper. You cannot say this.
And we've hit the quota for the cochie reaper and
have a roommate. But why does he have.
Speaker 4 (22:28):
A townhouse that just feels like a lot of space?
Speaker 1 (22:31):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (22:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
I didn't ask that question. I just was like, oh,
this is this is nice. Everything was clean.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
I look, it was no dishes in the sink. Ah ah.
Speaker 4 (22:43):
Now that is mess. That's mess.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
When you're like trying to impress and it's like it
looks like those dishes been there for days.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Nothing was in the SNK. He had a dish washer. No,
I think he washed him by hand.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
Oh even hotter manual. Oh, they don't make him like
that anymore. Sins not that I would know. You know,
that's not that's that's not even my category anymore. But
I'm saying I've never heard a girl say, oh I
was at this guy's house. He was washing dishes by hand,
you know. Yeah, I mean I didn't even know men
knew how to wash dishes, weaponizing their incompetence. But now
(23:15):
the ViBe's changed. We're not listening to toxic chemistry no more.
We're listening to I don't know, like a mill ounge
that means mix in French. We're listening to a mix
of like kind of like just like vivy stuff. And
it's much sexier, it's much elevated. It's much like, oh
this is nice girl.
Speaker 3 (23:33):
Listen when I tell you, I'm gonna go back to
the house and I'm gonna see what this Koochie Reaper
playlist is talking about.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Please send it to your boot.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
Oh no, she already has. She has a really good playlist.
But it's very like love like. But yeah, I want
to hear what Koochie Reaper is talking about. Okay, well,
it just it.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Felt like two completely different dates. Well what happened in
my hotel versus what happened at his house?
Speaker 2 (23:55):
It felt like two.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Completely different It made it better, it was I was
this is what it should have been the whole time.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
But maybe was it something like this? Hold on city?
Speaker 4 (24:09):
Was you there?
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Okay? So what do you take your clothes off? Or
he takes them off for you?
Speaker 1 (24:15):
I shouldn't think he helped me take my clothes off,
and my damn, I gotta turn this off.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
That said too much? Should we set some candle?
Speaker 1 (24:22):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (24:24):
He might have lit a candle. It was a little lao.
It was ambient. It was nice. You know, my god,
I'm sick. I'm not to throw up. Please don't throw
I'm not to throw up. That in a good way. Okay,
So we helped you take your clothes off? What were
you wearing? What was I wearing?
Speaker 1 (24:40):
And I was wearing these like long oversized corduroy pants.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
You don't want her this white shirt on? And I
had on I don't know, I had on stuff that was.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Kind of casual because I changed out of my clothes
when I got back to my hotels. So did you
cancel the other No, I was with my friend, so
I hung out with her. Watch you hung out with
her first, and then I hung out with her first.
We watched a bunch of like professional background singers do karaoke.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Essentially. It was really dope. It was really really cool,
like you got singers of.
Speaker 4 (25:17):
Course, Okay, we've got to put that in the dump.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
It was just like good singers singing, like if I
like whatever and like yeah, hello, hello hello. But you
know when like somebody who can sing can sing, they
like kind of change it a little bit, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Yes, they'll sing like I'm o shit.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
Yeah, they like put their little like the little dizazz
on it. So it was a couple of people doing that.
It was really it was it's every Wednesday.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
Cool. Well obviously I can't sing, but no, you would
have killed it at.
Speaker 4 (25:56):
Okay, all right, so you're closed out.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
We did that right anyways, and we hooked up. It
was beautiful.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
I was like, is this It felt like whoo Like
I needed that m hm right up top needed that.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Something to take the edge off.
Speaker 4 (26:12):
A nice Okay, so did you did you spend the night?
Speaker 2 (26:16):
No? No, you gotta bring win and left. Yeah I
think I left. That would have happened and been in
the bed, like so you just gonna go that stuff
to do. So I went back, I went back home.
He dropped me off, and that night you had stuff
to do. I had to be up in the morning.
I had stuff to do. I don't even remember what
the what all the.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Details were, but I had to get back back to
the crew.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Honestly, that is that's hot too, when you have something
to do, and it's like you're not just saying because
when you spend the night with somebody and then they
just act like, okay, so this is my day now,
that's no, that's no.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
And also he had he wears a lot of jewelry.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
He had left a bunch of his jewelry at the hotel,
so he needed to get his stuff.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
So that's truly the real reason why I was like,
all right.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
Well let's go.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
So that was the first night that I was in London, right, girl,
that's you're starting so high, and I'm like, can it
get better?
Speaker 4 (27:08):
Girl?
Speaker 1 (27:09):
So then I had I had shows. He had asked
me what I did. I told I was a comedian.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
He wanted to come.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
I said no, not to the first show because I
need to figure out the set. But I talked about
him the second show happens. I talked about about him
at the second show too. They in the crowd like,
is he here? London was wet for this information.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Sang right now and then.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
So he was like, how about I come to the
show on Saturday and then we spend the night together
and then we can do brunch on Sunday.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
I'll take you to the flower Market and we can Girl,
this is giving love Jong.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
We can go to the cinema. Have you been to
the cinema in London? I was like, no, bitch, wait
holds up. So he goes to the show, obviously comes
to the show. He's obsessed.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
He comes to the show.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I tried to talk about him, but knowing he was there,
maybe not I really want to talk about him. So
I mentioned him and then didn't talk about him. It
was a bunch of people who was into the pod
that we're at the shows in London. Shout out to them, Hey, mess,
he's overseas are UK?
Speaker 4 (28:05):
Mess?
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Yeah city. They said you have to come, you gotta
come back.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
You should do a mess live in the UK. Nice
they got messed out there. I'm about to tell you
the rest of mine.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
So we spend all Sunday together, me and this man, Marie.
We go to the movies. We see the new Leonardo
DiCaprio Tiana Taylor Joint. It's cute. We're having a good time.
The movie ends. He walks me back to my hotel.
We said goodbyees. He's like damn. He said I'm an
miss you for real.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
And I was like, oh, now, Marie as a as a,
as a Haitian queen, how did you feel about that?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
I was like, yeah, I feel like you should. I
feel like we had a nice little connection. You know.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
It felt like why would you not miss me? You
know what I mean? Now? But what about you? I
was like, I'll be back, y'all.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
When I tell you all, tuk my dickens so quick
and be like, well nice meet y bye you, saying
I'll be back.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
I'll be behind my dad.
Speaker 1 (29:05):
I'll be back kids, no worries. Then I never come back,
but I'm in London. I love London. And meeting him
was like, oh, now when I come back here, I
can I hit him on the one set right, But
he was like, you should really come back for the holidays.
Europe during the Christmas season is really really nice, Like
we can go to the holiday.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
He's like making plants less than he avoid mine. You
basically get out of it.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
He said, you have to come for the holidays, which
is like you know, family.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
Lights, trees, girl you married? Hold on.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
So he.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
Leaves and I'm like, damn, I'm hungry, Like I should
go get something to eat. And there was this place.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
This is this place called Duck and Waffle and it's
like a twenty four hour diner and it's supposed to
be really really good. And the last two times I've
been in London, I haven't been able to go. So
I was like, I'm going, right, I still got on
my clothes from the movies. I'm but you know, I
look cute. I get to dug and Waffle. They said, hey,
we're closed. We're not open twenty four hours on Sundays.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
I'm like, what, that's insane, why would you do that?
While they talking to me, this white lady comes up.
Do you have a lighter? Have you go on light.
I did.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
I gave it to her. She goes outside. Guy, the
man at the front desk is like, yeah, you go
to sushi Symble. They still open for fifteen more minutes. Hey,
First of all, I'm not getting last minute sushi at
the bottom of the.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
End of the night.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
Yeah, tempora, No, I'm a girl sad shrip nah.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
So I'm like, he's like, you go, you gotta go now,
you gotta go now.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
But I'm like, I want my lighter back.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
The ladies outside with my lighter talking to these three
black dudes, I said.
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Well, let's see.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
So I walk over there and they're super tall, six
six six four sixty three.
Speaker 2 (30:48):
I'm that girl can't get my lighter back.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
She gets it to me. They hear my accent. They say,
oh American. I said, I'm from New York. One of
them is from Virginia, one of them is from Oakland.
The third one is from London. So we're laughing and
talking to each other. They're like, you gotta come out
with us tonight. You're coming out, So they kidnapped you.
I said, no, they are coming with us.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
Girls.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
They kind of did kidnap me, but I let them
kidnap me because I was like, they're all very attractive,
they're all dressed very well. I think I'll be okay.
They're like we're getting in the cab. We go to Soho.
Speaker 3 (31:20):
Come get a drink. Now, Marie, that's mess. So you're
saying kidnapper kidnappers can't dress.
Speaker 1 (31:26):
Yeah, if they dress bad, they that's the kidnapper. If
they fashionable, if he's you, he had on a tweed coat.
Speaker 4 (31:33):
I don't know with a kidnapper and a tweet coat,
that's exact.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Jack the Ripple their you're right, okay. So also it
(31:59):
was like we jump in a cab like one of
these like black taxis in London, you know, the classic
mister bean joints that are very expensive, right, I mean
it's like five dollars Like every second, I'm like, they're not.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Gonna kill me. This is this right is too expensive? Right?
So we get the Soho. They're because they're so tall
we walked in.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
Everyone thought that they were like professional athletes and or celebrities.
Speaker 2 (32:21):
So everybody's in love with them.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
The men stopping them to take pictures, the women, the
white women throwing themselves at these dudes.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
This is insane, Sydney.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
It was crazy. I'm with and it's just me. It's
me and three people. That actually was four dudes because
a fourth friend came. I don't know these people. I
don't know anybody's name, but they like they buying drinks
and they.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
Should have thought that you were the celebrity because there's
all these security guards guarding you.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Right, yeah, you thank you, Sidney. That's a woman's perspective. Anyway,
that club closes, we go to another place. We pick
up a girl along the way because you got to
well yeah, because you know, she she seed the material,
she sees what they're doing, and they're just the group
is getting bigger. So it's like me, these four guys
and now it's.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
Two other women. So we go to girls. You girls.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
We go to this other bar in Soho. They buying drinks.
They're like, it's ten pounds to get in. It's a
lady at the front door. She's upset.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
She don't want to pay to get in.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
The guys and what they're like, oh, that's nothing, ten pounds,
ten pounds.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
I think that's like shells. That's pennies.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
So I think that's like twelve or fifteen us dollars
like he was like, we got that. They pay, they're
briying drinks. We're still taking shots. Now we're going to
a third location.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Marie, y'all are on tour.
Speaker 1 (33:35):
Mind you I still need to eat since on an
empty summach you wasn't full from mister you know lorenz.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Tate over there.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Well he didn't feed. Well, he did cheat me. He
made me breakfast. He cooked me breakfast.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Step he made you breakfast, Marry he did. He made
me breakfast. He said, have you had a proper English
breakfast yet?
Speaker 1 (33:53):
I was like no, So he made me eggs and
beans and TOAs.
Speaker 3 (33:58):
It sounds like you're the penis reaper, that's.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Not anyway he took from there. But that was it.
That was hourson hours ago.
Speaker 1 (34:11):
The sun has set by now, so we're in this
third club. They don't want to let us in because
all the girls got on sneakers. You can't get in
because of the trainers.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
So what were you? I had the I had these sneakers.
Speaker 3 (34:21):
On, but they didn't. But those weren't trainers, they were these.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
Are sneakers, that's what they called. You said.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
They didn't want to let the girls in, like it
was the girls and not you were all three.
Speaker 1 (34:31):
Of us had sneakers and they're like, you can't come
in with the trainers. And the one of the guys
in with is like, listen, we're about to go in there,
spend a lot of money. What do we need to
do to get them in?
Speaker 2 (34:41):
They like they're shaking ass with their hands out the bottles,
they got the stream, the sparkling. Oh my god, that's
me my own life that there. Bottle girls.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
They buy bottles. We I'm dancing on the booth. They
bring food out. I don't even know what it is.
Rib tips, pork, pork, dick rip at the clerk, have
no idea two I am sis, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
You chicken bites I have for your stomach. That's insane. Girl.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
I'm pequila here and then little chicken chicken riblets or
whatever giblets in my mouth. I did like one of
the dudes, but one of the other dudes have liked
me instairs.
Speaker 4 (35:22):
So you had your eye on the tweed.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
I had my eye on a tweet taste.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Well, and then you know, the one with the skinny
jeans looking at me, so I was like, you.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
Kept calling him despicable me and I could not stop laughing.
And then I was like, no, no, no, he had
a turtleneck on. So he he reminded me of Frozen
Girl the Incredibles.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Yes, he had a turtleneck, a vest and skinny jeans.
Speaker 2 (35:45):
Looks exactly like him evil villain Chelsea Pointy boots. Yes,
So then what'd you do? You posted him online? I did,
but only in the story, so you had twenty four
hours to see that. Okay, So then what happened for that.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
You?
Speaker 2 (36:01):
I think somebody said it to him because he liked it.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
Wait, pain girl, I don't follow him. He don't follow
me either though, so God is good. But he did
see the post, so he like, I'm going back with you?
I said, oh, I said, well, worst comes to worst.
I gotta ride back to my hotel.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
You know what.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
Give it up for these UK niggas who are super
aggressive and they know what they want, and like, yeah,
you're coming with us, I'm going with you.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
Yeah, I'm leaving here, you here with yeah? Like and yeah.
It was like four o'clock in the morning and we
stumbling back.
Speaker 5 (36:36):
To the hotel and yo, the people at the front
desk like, well, well, they were watching me make out
with this dude for a whole week.
Speaker 2 (36:47):
Now this other guy anyway, whatever, So.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Those American girls really know how to get them.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Maum, he'll be my American. So yeah, but he's lit,
he's lit. I'm tired.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
I'm leaving the next I'm literally leaving the next day.
I'm texting you on What's app See, I made a mistake.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Yo, you sent me the pictures.
Speaker 3 (37:08):
I could not stop prying because him in your bed,
just mad comfortable sleep, said, how could he.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
Be a doctor's And then that's the other thing.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
He's also he missed work. He was coming for their
annual checkup. They're like, whoa did you just not getting
checked today?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
So he was getting a gall bladder removed, He's like,
because when I met him, he was like, yeah, I
gotta be up at five. How are we getting back
to my hotel at four? Also, sir, you're wasted, You're
fucking wasted.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
You're blasted. You don't even know what date is. And
then you're going to go to.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
Work like that girl fully me, like mescal girl, fully.
Speaker 2 (37:52):
Drunk. That is a mess.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
Yeah, so you know we were hanging out, we were
hooking up, but it was like it was like day.
Speaker 2 (37:58):
I said, do you have a condom?
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Ye, bitch, that's your opening line, and honestly, more you
girls need to be like breezy, okay.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
Do you have a condom?
Speaker 1 (38:09):
CARDI b no, oh actually garda guardian. She Cardie, but
he did not, so I was like, cool, bye, goodnight.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
I want. I went to sleep for a couple of hours,
woke up. He gets up. He's like, I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go find some condoms. I said, you.
Speaker 3 (38:28):
Know what, I love the initiative that these people are
taking and you're that good.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
They they get up, they jump up out of the
show girl. I jumped up.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
Probably still drunk, and I was like, well, when he leave,
I'm just gonna he's not gonna remember my room number.
He doesn't have my number. Before you leave. He's like, okay,
what's your numbers so we can in case we get
this condemned.
Speaker 4 (38:47):
He's a doctor, he's all about taking the notes.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
He took my number and then he was like and
then what's the room number? And I was like, I'm
going to throw up. This is killing me right now.
I was like, well, I don't want to open the door.
When he comes back, he like, I'm even my coat
in here, so you know I'm coming to.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
See I'm going out in the cold for the condoms. Man, Sir,
you're just just too thirsty. Just two thirty girl, the
condoms kept him warm. Girl, Girl, what doctor? What's his name?
So I know, Hey, I ain't never seen him in
the UK.
Speaker 1 (39:16):
Girl, I don't want him nowhere near my esophagus. Well,
I mean, I don't know how great of a doctor
he is when he shows up. But when I posted
him in the stories, people are like, oh, I know
him from TV, and I was like.
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Okay, so he got a real doctor.
Speaker 4 (39:30):
Doctor, he's a he's a doctor influencer or something like that.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Yeah, but he's actually he's I don't know. I haven't
been to his offices. I wouldn't know. Anyway, he does
come back, he comes back to office. Listen, I did
I did have my check check check ITCHI but uh yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was cool, you know Marie Howard. Wow.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
After he slept in my bed for like an hour
and a half and I was like, yo, I have.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
To you got to get out of here. We have
to go.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
And he was like, have you had a proper English breakfast,
and then he took me across the street. Urree, you
were so unseerious. You wasn't trying to go nowhere.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
You weren't trying to go home. They need to ask
you you want to extend your trade?
Speaker 1 (40:19):
Did ask me to extend my trip? He said, I'm
very spontaneous. I said, listen, I'm not extending my trip.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
Hey, sir, as a doctor, you cannot be spontaneous.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
You really need to be by the books. Okay, I'm
gonna call hippo. They got hip, but you can't.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
You don't know hip HOPA hi hi ho hip. But yeah,
he was like, yeah, I'll get you a new flight.
I said, well, I'm flying first class back, so you
have to get me a first class seat backset or
I said.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Don't do it. I was like no.
Speaker 1 (40:50):
We go across the street and it's the same place
I went. When I got there, the woman recognized me.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
The woman is like, welcome back. He goes, how many
are you niggas you had in here?
Speaker 1 (41:02):
I'm like, girl, yeah, dude, now just sit me, give
me give me that table that I got. Usually you are, bitch,
how you be a regular? You're there for how many
days girls a week? You're already a regular yo.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
In a week. She was like, welcome back in.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
I was like, oh girl, I barely remember the lady
and that's mess.
Speaker 3 (41:25):
I just want to let you know, ladies, when you're
working hostesses, Matred's whatever you are.
Speaker 4 (41:31):
If you see a gal come in with multiple niggas,
you don't.
Speaker 1 (41:34):
Know her, you don't know her, you have never seen
her in your day. Welcome for time. Yes, that's exactly
what you're about.
Speaker 2 (41:41):
Girls. Girl, that's a girl's girl. Anything other than that,
you're a hater. You're an op. You're not and be trusted.
You're goofy. You a op. She said, welcome back. I
walked and she said it los some dufis ashit. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:53):
But he was like he was like, yeah, we're gonna
do two English breakfasts. Breakfasts and then he ordered it
to quila. I said, is that a joke? Why would
you get a tequila for.
Speaker 3 (42:05):
We have to report him. I'm not playing like, there's
no reason why a doctor who's uh that successful and
well known should be having tequila?
Speaker 2 (42:17):
Is that early? I was like, what I said, did
you say to que what time is it? Uh?
Speaker 1 (42:22):
Probably like twelve something disgusting. Yeah, nasty, he said, I
already miss work. It was Monday, sir, gets your life together,
clean yourself in the week.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
He said, fuck it, we ball. He said, the boys.
Are you want to go hang out with the boys?
Speaker 1 (42:42):
I said, I got my bag with me because I'm
leaving today.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
Here, let's take the tube to the boys and then
we'll get you to the airport. I said, no, I'm
not taking the tube. I'm taking a car. He said, no,
no one takes a car to the airport in London.
Speaker 4 (42:57):
Yeah, he said, give me all this information.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
I'm going to report. Whatever you don't, I will because
this is ridiculous.
Speaker 1 (43:04):
Anyway, he professed his love to me, and he was like,
I can't believe I may you're so late.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
And you know, uh, I think you could be the
mother of my children.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
And that's also mess Sir.
Speaker 2 (43:16):
I don't know you. I was like, you're a long baby.
You're six foot six dude.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
He's Jack and the beanstock girl five four FuMB I said, listen,
next time I come back to London, I don't want
to see you in those pants.
Speaker 2 (43:29):
I need to see you in a looser girl.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
When I tell you. I was like, he basically had
on yoga pants.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
It looks like.
Speaker 1 (43:38):
He had on aloe yoga pant, had on Lulu Lemon
and Lula Lemon, Lula on that, but Lulu London. Yeah,
it was Lulu London.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
Great. That's also the title of the Yeah, Eddie, I
had a great time. I take the other one after
he brought me.
Speaker 1 (43:58):
Off and I said, I'm on the train and he
was like, a who's trying to take you on the
tube to the airport?
Speaker 2 (44:04):
And I was like, I know. But I went with
another with another friend and he was like, what friend?
Speaker 3 (44:09):
And I was like, a friend, when you told me,
you told him that you're on the.
Speaker 4 (44:14):
Tube, and the I thought, he was that's crazy, I'm
on the.
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Tube right now. I did keep thinking.
Speaker 1 (44:23):
I was like, what if he showed up to my
hotel to surprised me and take me to the airport
and I'm lingering with Jack and the beans.
Speaker 3 (44:29):
Nobody would do that except somebody that you already know that,
somebody that you used.
Speaker 2 (44:34):
Stand up anyway, I didn't get murdered. I met two
people that I like. I met a bunch of people
that I liked actually, but uh, yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (44:45):
They both have a messaged me on WhatsApp since I've
been back. One called me and listen you that you
that Penis reaper. You got your niggas like that? I said,
they on the landline. Hew, my lady, Hello, please connect
me to Marette Ray.
Speaker 2 (45:04):
Yo. When you got a nigga picking up the phone,
I got a call you dud don't even know how
to text?
Speaker 1 (45:14):
He said, Well, let me see what I gotta put
a plus one plus world. You got that good, good
and alcohol girl.
Speaker 2 (45:29):
Anyway, I'll have to say it was a great trip.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
And I want you Hays to know when a woman
says she had a great trip, that means she hooked
up with somebody and didn't get kidnapped.
Speaker 2 (45:36):
So that's what happened.
Speaker 1 (45:38):
So I love that for me and my sister's now like, oh,
I might go to Belgium for Thanksgiving, and I said.
Speaker 2 (45:45):
Oh, maybe maybe I'll come with you, because.
Speaker 4 (45:48):
That's not that's not that part.
Speaker 2 (45:49):
Maybe I go to London for a couple of days,
so we'll see. I think you should. I think you should.
Speaker 3 (45:57):
We we love when you do these adventures. I mean
they really just make my day and anybody who's listening
or I'm sure.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
They at the end of a seat like no, he
called what what did we learn here? What we learned
is if your single, always have a lighter on you
and a condom, because if you had that, you were
be tempted to use it. Yes, you don't have it,
then you gotta think about it.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
You have time.
Speaker 3 (46:21):
Because you he won't give you enough time to think
about He's already put his coat on.
Speaker 2 (46:25):
It ran out to the dam. He left his goat. Yo,
he left his goat. I'll be right back. I was like,
you're not coming back. You're not gonna have the room number?
What is it? Three? One three? I was like, whoo.
Speaker 1 (46:36):
So he might have been a little bit smarter than
we thought he was because he figured out all the
things that were tricks that I was about to pull.
Speaker 3 (46:45):
But yeah, shut out to this many eat prey here
situation e prey.
Speaker 2 (46:51):
Do do pray do? Yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
So the white woman who tried to steal my lighter
really popped my final night off for her the great way.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
What's her name, we don't know, we'll never know.
Speaker 1 (47:03):
I got in the car with them, and she never
She might have been my fairy godmother, my fairy dick mother.
Speaker 2 (47:08):
She's never fairy dick mother. Another title.
Speaker 3 (47:14):
Thank you so much for popping off our second season
with one of the best.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
We will catch up.
Speaker 3 (47:20):
We will have another episode obviously in episodes after that,
and so thank you for all that you do for us.
Speaker 2 (47:26):
Thank you for showing up to work sick. We had.
Speaker 3 (47:29):
We had to get the people that I had to
get this to them because when I heard it, I said.
Speaker 2 (47:33):
Everybody got to hear this. Sidney was screaming on the phone.
Speaker 1 (47:35):
I did, keep in mind, I did give her more
detailed explanation of everything.
Speaker 2 (47:39):
I don't deserve. Okay, but I don't know who's listening
to this. I mean it's a guy here.
Speaker 3 (47:43):
Yeah, maybe maybe we'll do some more stuff on the Patreon.
Speaker 2 (47:48):
Who knows. Come see us over there?
Speaker 3 (47:51):
Yeah, over there?
Speaker 2 (47:53):
All right, Well, this is how we wanted to pop
off the first one. And we have much much more
mess for y'all for the next year.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
And I'm excited to share that with y'all. So you
can see our faces while we talk.
Speaker 3 (48:07):
Yes, I and I will stay away from the five
hour energy shots so that I can be all that
I can be when I come back to the next episode.
Speaker 2 (48:15):
Well, yeah, I believe in your friend.
Speaker 3 (48:17):
Thanks, guys, don't forget to rate review I need more,
I need more reviews.
Speaker 2 (48:22):
We should already be past two.
Speaker 3 (48:24):
Thousand by now, we're not, So get them up, y'all
on what Spotify?
Speaker 2 (48:30):
On? On Spotify and Apple? What y'all doing? What y'all doing?
Y'all listening but not type a y y'all.
Speaker 4 (48:36):
Stay in the.
Speaker 2 (48:37):
Comments for Instagrams and TikTok.
Speaker 3 (48:38):
So do that work on where where the reviews and
comments matter?
Speaker 4 (48:42):
Okay, okay, yay, see you next time.
Speaker 2 (48:45):
Boy. Mess with Sydney Washington and Marie Foston is a
production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio podcast,
created and hosted by Sidney Washington and Marie Foston.
Speaker 1 (48:57):
Executive produce by Olivia Aguilar and Han Sonny, super produced
by Becca Ramos, Edited and mixed by Brian Jeffries.
Speaker 2 (49:04):
If you would like your messages read on air, please
email us at messthpodcast at gmail dot com, or call
for your messages to be played at seven six three
two eight zero six five eight eight
Listening to mess Okay, second season whoa strong coming in?
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Chaotic and strong? Yeah, girl, tell them what happened?
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Well, you know, I'm more late than usual dealing with
a I don't even know if I want to.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Know if it's a bug or someone put a hex.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
On me, or it could just you know, taking five
hour energy shots.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
You know, a couple of days in a row. It
could have been that.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
So you're sick, Yeah, you did your I tried to
do a little wand situation.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Girl, Yours never looked better. I don't.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
I am now what you're sick and you're laying in
bed is the wig in the bed.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Free?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
I know you've been waiting for me, but take it
easy on me.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I know you've been waiting.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
Yes, I have been waiting, but your hell looks so great.
It don't look like sick girl.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Hair. It was in the bed with me as well.
So you got out the bed and did your hair.
I got in the car.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
I did I have nausea pills with me. I've just
I haven't been able to hold anything down.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
Yeah, so I hold you down. Well, I'm here to
hold you down for the pod. If anybody, if anybody's nauseous.
How got you? You've already taken five of these? Yes, girl?
How many? Like? Well, how does it work? How many
milligrams is this?
Speaker 3 (01:28):
I don't know, but it's just I've just been throwing
up since yesterday, and I had a podcast yesterday with
Stravo's in All the Way Boondocks Queens? Did you throw
up in Queens? I threw up before Queen's and then
violently after.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Well, yeah, queens would make me sick. To musta makes well,
no shade to the Queen's girls. Queens gets it.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
I used to be on Jamaica Avenue with y'all, so
well we have.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
We have video now, full video, So yeah, they should
get to see you and all your glory.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
They should see me in a good with my good bang.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
Yes, I am not sick, but my hair looks it
No that this is actually coming out today.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
It looks so good. Yeah, No, I don't.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
I just I can't scratch my scalp properly. It's gotta go.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
I thought you were taking it out already. I was planning,
but I was like, but what am I gonna? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (02:21):
You know, I had stuff to do and I haven't
made a single appointment, But I am gonna go look
at some hair today. So okay, you're looking at some
hair that, yeah, I'm gonna buy it. Okay, Okay, I'm
gonna buy some bundles today.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
All right, if all goes.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Well, everything is going well, Okay, you can there's no
way that you can be unwell as unwell as I am.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
You're you're doing great.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
So we should should we unpack how you're sick or
what got you sick?
Speaker 2 (02:49):
We we are here about you.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Okay, this was the emergency episode because so much has transpired, so.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Much has happened. Yes, wow, thank you for keeping me
on task.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Don't want to bore them with my foolishness. Let's get
into it, okay, right, we had a birthday bash.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
She was phenomenal.
Speaker 1 (03:05):
We had a birthday party. The Mullet was there, and yeah,
I had a good time. I don't think that I
was as lit as I wanted to be, but everybody
around me seemed to be either pretty high or pretty drunk.
Speaker 3 (03:18):
No wait, hold on, wait, what do you mean you
weren't as high or lit as you would want to be.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
I feel like I was pretty sober at my birthday. Actually,
I think I had like two drinks.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
I lost one of them.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
When you bought the cake out, I gave it to
a girl and then after I blew the blunt candle out,
I was like, where's my drink? And literally when the
photographer sent me to photos, I went back and I
was looking at I have the glass here, here, it
is in this other girl's hand.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
And then I never saw the glass again. So that okay.
But yeah, I don't know. I feel good.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
I think birthdays are supposed to be are supposed to be,
you know, the day that you do what makes you
feel good and you're.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
Around people who are you happy.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Absolutely, somebody did ask Amina, why was I not invited
to maurice fortieth?
Speaker 2 (04:07):
And I mean it said what she said? What she said, Well,
she had she had a party, so it must have
been her fortieth. And I said, whoa, who hate you?
Speaker 1 (04:17):
I said, well, first of all, you skip so many
decades to land.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
There is hate speech.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
Yes, so holy, I mean jeezuise that a gal can't
have a party, can't have a blast.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, I mean it was like, well we went to
Morocco for Herberday last year.
Speaker 4 (04:33):
Exactly, and no one said anything about that.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
That ten days would have been like you must be
forty days, right.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Nobody said that.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Nobody said but I have a little party with a
light up floor, and people are like, she got an
ARP card, it must be And.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
You know they tried to get me on there, you know, yeah,
the scammers. They try to get me on AARP and
I don't belong there either, so it's no nice. It's
no nice.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
So next year I'm going to have an even bigger party,
and so I'm gonna think I'm fifty.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
So yeah, I love that. Yeah, yeah, you can't go wrong.
Yeah yeah, yeah. Hopefully I'll have like a big sexy
loft or something. I'll have it at my house.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Listen, friends, we're putting it. It's in the universe again.
We have to get merch that's God's favorite and in parentheses,
just Marie. No, everything works out for you and you
will have that loft.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
There's already a brand it's called God's.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Favorite, I know, but this one is in parentheses, just Marie.
So people have all these God's favorites out there, but
you truly truly top five.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Well let's talk about it.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Because you know, I went to London and I said,
I like this trip.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
It's gonna be like a really great trip, you.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Know, Yes, I said, I always have a good time
when I go. I know I'm gonna have a great time.
Any a better time. So I stayed in a different hotel,
but like same block that I always stay on. And
when I got to the hotel, they oh, first of all,
from the beginning of the trip, everything was looking real
good for me. Yes, the box that I was waiting
(06:09):
on with my clothes got delivered before I had to
leave my house.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Right before nicked. Time missed in the natime.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
I left my house late, got to the airport, went
through security in literally ten minutes. I mean, when do
you not you have pre check? You what I had,
But you know, preachers were in priority.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
PreCheck closes after a certain time at the airport. Who
knew who? That's a mess.
Speaker 4 (06:30):
Let's go tsa pre check.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
What y'all gotta do, what y'all gotta do on any
day that isn't a day that pre check works, Like,
if it's open, it should be open twenty four hours.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
I believe.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
It really didn't make any sense, but they were there
when I got there. My driver was very slow. I
did ask him to step on it, and I think
he slowed down. He was like, because I couldn't check
in on my phone, so I had to check in
at the desk. Oh, I had to drop a bag. Okay,
so that's where the drama lies. So I was scared,
but I made it. And then I got to the gate.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
I said, is it the full flight because.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
I was in the middle seat, and they were like, no,
it's not fulk and they bumped me up to the
road that had no seats in front of it, and
I said.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Okay, come on, we are getting these T shirts.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Just Marie. Okay, I feel like you want God's face.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Oh no, no, this is I've honestly, I've had food
poisoning so many times.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
Yeah, this is not food poisoning.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
I'm positive that this is in food poisoning because food
poison poisoning I'm able to shake.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
I went to the beach. I went to the beach
with food poisoning.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
I was throwing up out of my mouth and my
button and I still managed to go to the beach
with y'all in to loom and this is something completely different.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
So what we think it is.
Speaker 3 (07:52):
My body is fully rejecting everything anything, and the reason
why I was taking five hour energy energy shots because
once you get to the point of sobriety, you're like,
what is so close to cocaine but not cocaine. That
just feels like, oh, I'll be able to sleep at
night knowing that I didn't relapse.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
And that was what a five hour shot was. For
my five hour energy you feel like cocaine.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
I want the feeling of like being able to be
up and doing things without the feeling of cocaine. Yeah,
without feeling like crackera, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So, yeah, I took those.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
It started when I was in Vegas because I was like, oh,
living Lavi the Vegas, I'm gonna have these late spots.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I don't understand so much judgment coming from the mullet.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Oh, so much judgment from the bang.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Yeah, let me. The bank is doing a weird thing.
I'm trying to spit it shut part it down the middle.
Then please don't Marie.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
I Yeah, I cannot.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Listen, y'all, not even a stringy bang.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Oh listen. And that was me when I was in
the club back in the day.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Oh went so the.
Speaker 4 (09:08):
Pictures of you in the shower, Oh yes, When I.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Was like, you know, what if I just swoop it
all the way to the to the side, you won't
notice that this was actually a blunt NICKI minaj bang
the whole time.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Oh you just chopped it? Did you cut it yourself? No, Now,
don't blame me like that. I don't know. Day I
was not diy at that. If you watched a YouTube
tutorio eleven, I was.
Speaker 3 (09:32):
Like, somebody else will do it. I went all the
way to Long Island and got my hair done. I
would get a sewing at that time, so really good
hair quality sewins. Obviously I was able to be in
the showers in Pashita, so yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
Anyway, so I landed and they don't give me no stamp.
I feel like some of these counfries don't give stamps
no more. In the passport girl, you live there, Why
would they give you a stamp when you're basically a resident.
The last time I went, they gave me a stamp
because I did six shows, So I guess you would
be like, I'm here for work. They didn't even nobody
asked me no question. Somebody said where are you going
(10:07):
to be? I mean maybe I.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Just skipped customs completely. Nobody spoke to me. No, that's
when you come back. They also when I came back, they.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
Didn't ask they didn't ask me nothing. I was like,
do I have Global entry? I walked through so fast.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
I was like, I think I have a stamp from
when I went to London last time.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Yeah, last time they stamped me. This time nobody even
touched my passport.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
But they said the stamps are out now they're not
going to be doing that. That's it's all going to
be in the system and the pages. Yeah, that's done. Sis,
you might as well just get the passport card. Okay,
so now you touch down in London.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
I took a card to my hotel. Of course, it
takes an hour and change.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Oh. I bumped into Jake Cornell. Oh, yes, he was
doing right.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
I bumped into him. He's flight left an hour before me.
My flight landed an hour early. I don't know how,
but we landed an hour early, and me and him
were walking out to get a cab at the same time.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
God's favorite Jess Marie, that's the time.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Because I swear to God, we jumped on a jet
stream or something. I don't know, but like, I was like, oh,
we teleported and our early is crazy.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
Never heard of that, not going to London and that
usually it's like late at least like twenty five.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Nope, girl, we left on time. We got there an
hour early. So my hotel I get there, they're like, oh,
your room is not ready. It's like one. It's like
one fifteen. They're like, it'll be ready bout three.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
I was like three, So what am I supposed to
do until that time? They were like, well, you know,
you get something to eat. There's a bar here.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Like I was like all right, So I left my
bags with them. I went across the street. I went
and got something to eat. Right, I had a I
don't even remember what I ate.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I come back. Room is ready.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
I'm upstairs, right before after I take a shower, right
before I take a nap.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
I'm like, let me jump on hinge. See what hinge talking? Hey?
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Because I said, bitch, we don't give a fuck about
you ate, We don't care about the lobby, we don't
care about your sheets.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
What is up? Give us why we're here? Right?
Speaker 1 (12:00):
So this guy, I had changed my location to London
a week before the trip.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
You got to be ahead of it. You got ahead
of it because it.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Filters out kind of riff raft that first couple of days,
and then when you get to the nitty gritty, that's
when people you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (12:14):
So you're king, your prince, your highness.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Your highness, my lord. So this guy really nice smile.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Here, I'll show you because I don't think you saw
his profile, but no, you sent me a picture of No,
I think you sent me pictures from his profile.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
Okay boom so Sidney profile. Yeah, so you can show
me again so I can get afresh. You need to
see how I was like.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Oh, yeah, so this is that's what he looks like.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Nice smile. You know he's given AI hey girls a
good fucking photo.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
That's why the photo is first, like hey, uh, if
you're if you're look.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
At that arm, mom, Now I know those are stamped.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
Those arms are stamp baby, good god, those arms stamped.
My past. Does he work out with your sister? Girl?
I don't know who he is.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
He's in overalls the yeah, anyway, I got cavs.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Is he a soccer player? Probably? Bitch? This is good,
very nice. So for the videos.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
So uh, he he's like, hey, if you're free tonight
or tomorrow and you want to go see some jazz.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
We can go to this place, in this place I
love that.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Jazz in London jazz jazz, jez jazz.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
Or or it could be Love Jones. Boom boom boom
boom boom boom Brother to the Night. Is that alright?
You remember that? No, that's fine.
Speaker 4 (13:45):
Anybody who knows the movie knows what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Is that alright? Yeah? I think I just saw that
movie for the first time this year. Did you like it?
I don't remember the movie really. He actually kind of
looks like joking.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Okay, okay, anyway, so I say yeah, I said, yeah,
let's go.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Let's do tonight. Mind you already had plans for that night.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
I was gonna go see music with an with another friend,
but I was like, yeah, I can probably do too
much music.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
Never hurt nobody. So yeah, then I went to sleep.
I went to sleep. I woke up.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
I had two dates booked for that night. You have
to rest, right, I mean, I was tired, just fluid,
you know.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
I slept for like an hour.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Hang out with my friend that and he's texting me, Hey,
what time are we meeting? I get to the place
I don't have no service for whatever reason.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
When he was texting me.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Wait, you don't have any service because your phone is
still No I had so.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
I had service the whole time I was in London,
but while he was waiting for me at the place,
I didn't have I Haday.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Sis, you had service, but your with your bubbles were green?
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Yeah, Sis, I had service for uh what's that Google
map and social media can't Yeah, your.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Bubbles were green. Somebody was like, did Marie getting android?
I did not.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
That was almost as hurtful as somebody calling me, you know,
a woman of a particularly age. So anyway, I meet him.
He's sitting like right at the bottom front of the stage.
I was like, oh, that's aggressive.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
But we had a good time. He was cute, he
smelled good. The arms was arm in.
Speaker 3 (15:21):
Yeah, no, I saw, I see, I see it. It's
I mean, I think those greeted you first.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
It was definitely his teeth he had. Really, he is
really nice teeth. Damn smile might be nicer than mine
like that.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
No, I don't believe that that's how they are nice.
I think it goes with the whole face and pack.
But you have an amazing amazing smile. So no one's
better than yours.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
Girl.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
The place that we went to see jazz was like
around the corner from our hotel. I was like, do
you want to take a walk and he was like,
uh yeah. He said, well, let's just get my car.
I was like, but it's literally it said, it's a
four minute walk or a five minute drive. And he
was like, no, let's get my car. Okay, you know
the car is good.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Somebody's like, I need you to get to see my
heart to get my good car.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
So great, Okay, we get to the car. A little
jag you know, little, yeah, Jack, little? I said, ohas
in a while is the classic. Of course, I walked
to the wrong side of the car. He's like, no, no, no,
is this sign. You've never been in a jag before? No,
I've never been in English Jack, Okay.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
It was giving James Bond kind of sort of you okay,
it's kind of sexy.
Speaker 2 (16:25):
Actually.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
The music his music cuts on Sidney the first of all.
The song that was playing was called.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Pussy Reaper, Stop It, Stop it. Have you heard of
this pussy Reaper?
Speaker 4 (16:38):
I said, what holds on people?
Speaker 2 (16:41):
The name of the artist's toxic chemistry. I said, is.
Speaker 3 (16:45):
This we might that actually might need to be the
title that might need to be.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Sick Chemistry is the name of the song? Okay? Wait?
Speaker 1 (16:56):
No, that that because I was like he reapers Reaper,
coochie Reaper.
Speaker 4 (17:01):
Sorry, because I was like, that's I'm the.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Coochie Reaper that. I was like, what, I don't like that?
I said, what is this song?
Speaker 1 (17:08):
But that's what was playing for the five minutes that
it took for us to drive back to the hotel.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Okay, here we go. Do you find you found couchie Reaper?
That's the intro.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Girl, You need to tell me that on the phone.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Girl, because that was playing that on the phone.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
I was like what it was like funny, but I
was like, what is happening? Cool? The couchie Reaper loud? No, no,
(18:04):
wait sound wait.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
Toxic Chemistry is definitely, It's definitely the title for sure.
Cucie Reaper is insane. That would be an ick for.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
Me because that it did give it a little.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Ick, that couchie reaper. Couchie Reaper. How many if you
say kouchie reaper in the mirror three times does he
pop up? I don't know.
Speaker 4 (18:26):
I'm a try okay, keep going, keep going.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
So that's what's playing.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
We gets back to my hotel room and you know,
like we're making out and.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
What he tastes like? What he tastes like? He tasted
like beans and toasts. Shut the fuck up, you're a lie.
What kind of drink did he have? He had? I
think he had a margarita.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Now that's also an ick jazz and margarita's.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Don't go really, yeah, I would think like an old
fashion maybe you know Maker's Mark Manhattan.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
No, I think I think it was a margarita. It
was like a certain type of margarita. But I think
it was it might have been a messice margarit.
Speaker 3 (19:08):
Oh mescal, because you know what that unlocks.
Speaker 2 (19:11):
So I'm like, this is this your sex playlist? Now?
Is this medicine? Girl? Is this your sex playlist? We
in the car cackling. We get upstairs.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
I have a speaker with me. I said, put your
sex playlist on. That's the song that the Toxic Chemistry
is topy its is playing while we're in the room.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
I'm in my head about it.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
I'm like, this is weird, this is weird, this is
this is weird, guys. I don't know if anybody's listening,
but guys, specifically straight men.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
Cuchi Reaper is an ick and it's mess. Yeah, it's
funny for us, that's.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
Funny as comedy, but like just linguistically, Cuchi Reaper is
because Cucci is gross in terms of if somebody is like,
what that Kuchi do?
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Like, I don't want to hear she is classier than
poo pussy. Pussy Reaper is worse. Pucie Reaper feels like, Okay,
this person, they don't curse in front of their mom.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
You know what, You're right, You're right because because I
don't want to actually, I don't want to hear that.
I don't want to hear the P word, and I
don't want to hear koochie when we're having.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
Sex, but like, use the other word, use your words, like, oh,
you don't want to hear kouchie?
Speaker 2 (20:25):
What word do you want to hear when you're having sex?
Is it mine? It's wet?
Speaker 1 (20:29):
It's sorry, I apologize, this is this is this is
a lot apology.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Apologies.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
Sorry, sorry dad, Okay, forget about next. So okay, So
y'all kisses, get hot and happy.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
I said, do you have a condom. He does not,
I don't. What do I look like? What do you mean?
What do you look like? You look like a woman
on the go right exactly?
Speaker 3 (20:52):
You're you sound like a woman who's who would put
your pussy first.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
Yes, but if I don't have condoms, then I can't
have sex with you, and I love that. For me,
it's kind of like but like if you got him,
it's like, ah, unless see what happens. But I don't
travel with them.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
I don't have them. I've never bought condoms in my life.
Speaker 4 (21:09):
You're a liar me.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
I've never purchased the condom in my life. Why not?
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Because if you're the man, you should have them. That's
shad that should be in your tool kid.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
Yes, but sometimes we got to take the power back
and have the one hundred.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I get that, but I'm just saying it's not I'm
not sitting at the Jones in that way.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Okay, they not falling up my.
Speaker 4 (21:28):
Purse, all right?
Speaker 2 (21:29):
So she don't have no condoms.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
So but now we got to go find something, but
not you on the journey now for the condom, making
our way downtown and were walking on the wrong side
of the street.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
Of course, but he's like, I got them at my house.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
I said, oh, he said, by the time when we
get him at the store, we could have already been
at my house.
Speaker 4 (21:44):
I said, oh girl, now this is another thing.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
He got to show you the car, he got to
show you the house. That's how that's how flexing goes.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Okay, oh we're back in. Let's go back then, So
sitting in the car, don't touch nothing. Sit in the
car and don't touch nothing either we live and or
see you tomorrow. Okay, well girl, we loved Okay, I
got to the house, nice clean, watch or dryer townhouse,
he got the whole whatever.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
And it's just him. Of course he's a grown up.
He's the coochie reaper. You can't reaper. You cannot say this.
And we've hit the quota for the cochie reaper and
have a roommate. But why does he have.
Speaker 4 (22:28):
A townhouse that just feels like a lot of space?
Speaker 1 (22:31):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (22:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
I didn't ask that question. I just was like, oh,
this is this is nice. Everything was clean.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
I look, it was no dishes in the sink. Ah ah.
Speaker 4 (22:43):
Now that is mess. That's mess.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
When you're like trying to impress and it's like it
looks like those dishes been there for days.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Nothing was in the SNK. He had a dish washer. No,
I think he washed him by hand.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
Oh even hotter manual. Oh, they don't make him like
that anymore. Sins not that I would know. You know,
that's not that's that's not even my category anymore. But
I'm saying I've never heard a girl say, oh I
was at this guy's house. He was washing dishes by hand,
you know. Yeah, I mean I didn't even know men
knew how to wash dishes, weaponizing their incompetence. But now
(23:15):
the ViBe's changed. We're not listening to toxic chemistry no more.
We're listening to I don't know, like a mill ounge
that means mix in French. We're listening to a mix
of like kind of like just like vivy stuff. And
it's much sexier, it's much elevated. It's much like, oh
this is nice girl.
Speaker 3 (23:33):
Listen when I tell you, I'm gonna go back to
the house and I'm gonna see what this Koochie Reaper
playlist is talking about.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Please send it to your boot.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
Oh no, she already has. She has a really good playlist.
But it's very like love like. But yeah, I want
to hear what Koochie Reaper is talking about. Okay, well,
it just it.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Felt like two completely different dates. Well what happened in
my hotel versus what happened at his house?
Speaker 2 (23:55):
It felt like two.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Completely different It made it better, it was I was
this is what it should have been the whole time.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
But maybe was it something like this? Hold on city?
Speaker 4 (24:09):
Was you there?
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Okay? So what do you take your clothes off? Or
he takes them off for you?
Speaker 1 (24:15):
I shouldn't think he helped me take my clothes off,
and my damn, I gotta turn this off.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
That said too much? Should we set some candle?
Speaker 1 (24:22):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (24:24):
He might have lit a candle. It was a little lao.
It was ambient. It was nice. You know, my god,
I'm sick. I'm not to throw up. Please don't throw
I'm not to throw up. That in a good way. Okay,
So we helped you take your clothes off? What were
you wearing? What was I wearing?
Speaker 1 (24:40):
And I was wearing these like long oversized corduroy pants.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
You don't want her this white shirt on? And I
had on I don't know, I had on stuff that was.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Kind of casual because I changed out of my clothes
when I got back to my hotels. So did you
cancel the other No, I was with my friend, so
I hung out with her. Watch you hung out with
her first, and then I hung out with her first.
We watched a bunch of like professional background singers do karaoke.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Essentially. It was really dope. It was really really cool,
like you got singers of.
Speaker 4 (25:17):
Course, Okay, we've got to put that in the dump.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
It was just like good singers singing, like if I
like whatever and like yeah, hello, hello hello. But you
know when like somebody who can sing can sing, they
like kind of change it a little bit, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Yes, they'll sing like I'm o shit.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
Yeah, they like put their little like the little dizazz
on it. So it was a couple of people doing that.
It was really it was it's every Wednesday.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
Cool. Well obviously I can't sing, but no, you would
have killed it at.
Speaker 4 (25:56):
Okay, all right, so you're closed out.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
We did that right anyways, and we hooked up. It
was beautiful.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
I was like, is this It felt like whoo Like
I needed that m hm right up top needed that.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Something to take the edge off.
Speaker 4 (26:12):
A nice Okay, so did you did you spend the night?
Speaker 2 (26:16):
No? No, you gotta bring win and left. Yeah I
think I left. That would have happened and been in
the bed, like so you just gonna go that stuff
to do. So I went back, I went back home.
He dropped me off, and that night you had stuff
to do. I had to be up in the morning.
I had stuff to do. I don't even remember what
the what all the.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Details were, but I had to get back back to
the crew.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Honestly, that is that's hot too, when you have something
to do, and it's like you're not just saying because
when you spend the night with somebody and then they
just act like, okay, so this is my day now,
that's no, that's no.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
And also he had he wears a lot of jewelry.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
He had left a bunch of his jewelry at the hotel,
so he needed to get his stuff.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
So that's truly the real reason why I was like,
all right.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
Well let's go.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
So that was the first night that I was in London, right, girl,
that's you're starting so high, and I'm like, can it
get better?
Speaker 4 (27:08):
Girl?
Speaker 1 (27:09):
So then I had I had shows. He had asked
me what I did. I told I was a comedian.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
He wanted to come.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
I said no, not to the first show because I
need to figure out the set. But I talked about
him the second show happens. I talked about about him
at the second show too. They in the crowd like,
is he here? London was wet for this information.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Sang right now and then.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
So he was like, how about I come to the
show on Saturday and then we spend the night together
and then we can do brunch on Sunday.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
I'll take you to the flower Market and we can Girl,
this is giving love Jong.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
We can go to the cinema. Have you been to
the cinema in London? I was like, no, bitch, wait
holds up. So he goes to the show, obviously comes
to the show. He's obsessed.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
He comes to the show.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I tried to talk about him, but knowing he was there,
maybe not I really want to talk about him. So
I mentioned him and then didn't talk about him. It
was a bunch of people who was into the pod
that we're at the shows in London. Shout out to them, Hey, mess,
he's overseas are UK?
Speaker 4 (28:05):
Mess?
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Yeah city. They said you have to come, you gotta
come back.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
You should do a mess live in the UK. Nice
they got messed out there. I'm about to tell you
the rest of mine.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
So we spend all Sunday together, me and this man, Marie.
We go to the movies. We see the new Leonardo
DiCaprio Tiana Taylor Joint. It's cute. We're having a good time.
The movie ends. He walks me back to my hotel.
We said goodbyees. He's like damn. He said I'm an
miss you for real.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
And I was like, oh, now, Marie as a as a,
as a Haitian queen, how did you feel about that?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
I was like, yeah, I feel like you should. I
feel like we had a nice little connection. You know.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
It felt like why would you not miss me? You
know what I mean? Now? But what about you? I
was like, I'll be back, y'all.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
When I tell you all, tuk my dickens so quick
and be like, well nice meet y bye you, saying
I'll be back.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
I'll be behind my dad.
Speaker 1 (29:05):
I'll be back kids, no worries. Then I never come back,
but I'm in London. I love London. And meeting him
was like, oh, now when I come back here, I
can I hit him on the one set right, But
he was like, you should really come back for the holidays.
Europe during the Christmas season is really really nice, Like
we can go to the holiday.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
He's like making plants less than he avoid mine. You
basically get out of it.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
He said, you have to come for the holidays, which
is like you know, family.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
Lights, trees, girl you married? Hold on.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
So he.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
Leaves and I'm like, damn, I'm hungry, Like I should
go get something to eat. And there was this place.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
This is this place called Duck and Waffle and it's
like a twenty four hour diner and it's supposed to
be really really good. And the last two times I've
been in London, I haven't been able to go. So
I was like, I'm going, right, I still got on
my clothes from the movies. I'm but you know, I
look cute. I get to dug and Waffle. They said, hey,
we're closed. We're not open twenty four hours on Sundays.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
I'm like, what, that's insane, why would you do that?
While they talking to me, this white lady comes up.
Do you have a lighter? Have you go on light.
I did.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
I gave it to her. She goes outside. Guy, the
man at the front desk is like, yeah, you go
to sushi Symble. They still open for fifteen more minutes. Hey,
First of all, I'm not getting last minute sushi at
the bottom of the.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
End of the night.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
Yeah, tempora, No, I'm a girl sad shrip nah.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
So I'm like, he's like, you go, you gotta go now,
you gotta go now.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
But I'm like, I want my lighter back.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
The ladies outside with my lighter talking to these three
black dudes, I said.
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Well, let's see.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
So I walk over there and they're super tall, six
six six four sixty three.
Speaker 2 (30:48):
I'm that girl can't get my lighter back.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
She gets it to me. They hear my accent. They say,
oh American. I said, I'm from New York. One of
them is from Virginia, one of them is from Oakland.
The third one is from London. So we're laughing and
talking to each other. They're like, you gotta come out
with us tonight. You're coming out, So they kidnapped you.
I said, no, they are coming with us.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
Girls.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
They kind of did kidnap me, but I let them
kidnap me because I was like, they're all very attractive,
they're all dressed very well. I think I'll be okay.
They're like we're getting in the cab. We go to Soho.
Speaker 3 (31:20):
Come get a drink. Now, Marie, that's mess. So you're
saying kidnapper kidnappers can't dress.
Speaker 1 (31:26):
Yeah, if they dress bad, they that's the kidnapper. If
they fashionable, if he's you, he had on a tweed coat.
Speaker 4 (31:33):
I don't know with a kidnapper and a tweet coat,
that's exact.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Jack the Ripple their you're right, okay. So also it
(31:59):
was like we jump in a cab like one of
these like black taxis in London, you know, the classic
mister bean joints that are very expensive, right, I mean
it's like five dollars Like every second, I'm like, they're not.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Gonna kill me. This is this right is too expensive? Right?
So we get the Soho. They're because they're so tall
we walked in.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
Everyone thought that they were like professional athletes and or celebrities.
Speaker 2 (32:21):
So everybody's in love with them.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
The men stopping them to take pictures, the women, the
white women throwing themselves at these dudes.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
This is insane, Sydney.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
It was crazy. I'm with and it's just me. It's
me and three people. That actually was four dudes because
a fourth friend came. I don't know these people. I
don't know anybody's name, but they like they buying drinks
and they.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
Should have thought that you were the celebrity because there's
all these security guards guarding you.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Right, yeah, you thank you, Sidney. That's a woman's perspective. Anyway,
that club closes, we go to another place. We pick
up a girl along the way because you got to
well yeah, because you know, she she seed the material,
she sees what they're doing, and they're just the group
is getting bigger. So it's like me, these four guys
and now it's.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
Two other women. So we go to girls. You girls.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
We go to this other bar in Soho. They buying drinks.
They're like, it's ten pounds to get in. It's a
lady at the front door. She's upset.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
She don't want to pay to get in.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
The guys and what they're like, oh, that's nothing, ten pounds,
ten pounds.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
I think that's like shells. That's pennies.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
So I think that's like twelve or fifteen us dollars
like he was like, we got that. They pay, they're
briying drinks. We're still taking shots. Now we're going to
a third location.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Marie, y'all are on tour.
Speaker 1 (33:35):
Mind you I still need to eat since on an
empty summach you wasn't full from mister you know lorenz.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Tate over there.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Well he didn't feed. Well, he did cheat me. He
made me breakfast. He cooked me breakfast.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Step he made you breakfast, Marry he did. He made
me breakfast. He said, have you had a proper English
breakfast yet?
Speaker 1 (33:53):
I was like no, So he made me eggs and
beans and TOAs.
Speaker 3 (33:58):
It sounds like you're the penis reaper, that's.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Not anyway he took from there. But that was it.
That was hourson hours ago.
Speaker 1 (34:11):
The sun has set by now, so we're in this
third club. They don't want to let us in because
all the girls got on sneakers. You can't get in
because of the trainers.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
So what were you? I had the I had these sneakers.
Speaker 3 (34:21):
On, but they didn't. But those weren't trainers, they were these.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
Are sneakers, that's what they called. You said.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
They didn't want to let the girls in, like it
was the girls and not you were all three.
Speaker 1 (34:31):
Of us had sneakers and they're like, you can't come
in with the trainers. And the one of the guys
in with is like, listen, we're about to go in there,
spend a lot of money. What do we need to
do to get them in?
Speaker 2 (34:41):
They like they're shaking ass with their hands out the bottles,
they got the stream, the sparkling. Oh my god, that's
me my own life that there. Bottle girls.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
They buy bottles. We I'm dancing on the booth. They
bring food out. I don't even know what it is.
Rib tips, pork, pork, dick rip at the clerk, have
no idea two I am sis, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
You chicken bites I have for your stomach. That's insane. Girl.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
I'm pequila here and then little chicken chicken riblets or
whatever giblets in my mouth. I did like one of
the dudes, but one of the other dudes have liked
me instairs.
Speaker 4 (35:22):
So you had your eye on the tweed.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
I had my eye on a tweet taste.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Well, and then you know, the one with the skinny
jeans looking at me, so I was like, you.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
Kept calling him despicable me and I could not stop laughing.
And then I was like, no, no, no, he had
a turtleneck on. So he he reminded me of Frozen
Girl the Incredibles.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Yes, he had a turtleneck, a vest and skinny jeans.
Speaker 2 (35:45):
Looks exactly like him evil villain Chelsea Pointy boots. Yes,
So then what'd you do? You posted him online? I did,
but only in the story, so you had twenty four
hours to see that. Okay, So then what happened for that.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
You?
Speaker 2 (36:01):
I think somebody said it to him because he liked it.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
Wait, pain girl, I don't follow him. He don't follow
me either though, so God is good. But he did
see the post, so he like, I'm going back with you?
I said, oh, I said, well, worst comes to worst.
I gotta ride back to my hotel.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
You know what.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
Give it up for these UK niggas who are super
aggressive and they know what they want, and like, yeah,
you're coming with us, I'm going with you.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
Yeah, I'm leaving here, you here with yeah? Like and yeah.
It was like four o'clock in the morning and we
stumbling back.
Speaker 5 (36:36):
To the hotel and yo, the people at the front
desk like, well, well, they were watching me make out
with this dude for a whole week.
Speaker 2 (36:47):
Now this other guy anyway, whatever, So.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Those American girls really know how to get them.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Maum, he'll be my American. So yeah, but he's lit,
he's lit. I'm tired.
Speaker 1 (36:59):
I'm leaving the next I'm literally leaving the next day.
I'm texting you on What's app See, I made a mistake.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Yo, you sent me the pictures.
Speaker 3 (37:08):
I could not stop prying because him in your bed,
just mad comfortable sleep, said, how could he.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
Be a doctor's And then that's the other thing.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
He's also he missed work. He was coming for their
annual checkup. They're like, whoa did you just not getting
checked today?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
So he was getting a gall bladder removed, He's like,
because when I met him, he was like, yeah, I
gotta be up at five. How are we getting back
to my hotel at four? Also, sir, you're wasted, You're
fucking wasted.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
You're blasted. You don't even know what date is. And
then you're going to go to.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
Work like that girl fully me, like mescal girl, fully.
Speaker 2 (37:52):
Drunk. That is a mess.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
Yeah, so you know we were hanging out, we were
hooking up, but it was like it was like day.
Speaker 2 (37:58):
I said, do you have a condom?
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Ye, bitch, that's your opening line, and honestly, more you
girls need to be like breezy, okay.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
Do you have a condom?
Speaker 1 (38:09):
CARDI b no, oh actually garda guardian. She Cardie, but
he did not, so I was like, cool, bye, goodnight.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
I want. I went to sleep for a couple of hours,
woke up. He gets up. He's like, I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go find some condoms. I said, you.
Speaker 3 (38:28):
Know what, I love the initiative that these people are
taking and you're that good.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
They they get up, they jump up out of the
show girl. I jumped up.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
Probably still drunk, and I was like, well, when he leave,
I'm just gonna he's not gonna remember my room number.
He doesn't have my number. Before you leave. He's like, okay,
what's your numbers so we can in case we get
this condemned.
Speaker 4 (38:47):
He's a doctor, he's all about taking the notes.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
He took my number and then he was like and
then what's the room number? And I was like, I'm
going to throw up. This is killing me right now.
I was like, well, I don't want to open the door.
When he comes back, he like, I'm even my coat
in here, so you know I'm coming to.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
See I'm going out in the cold for the condoms. Man, Sir,
you're just just too thirsty. Just two thirty girl, the
condoms kept him warm. Girl, Girl, what doctor? What's his name?
So I know, Hey, I ain't never seen him in
the UK.
Speaker 1 (39:16):
Girl, I don't want him nowhere near my esophagus. Well,
I mean, I don't know how great of a doctor
he is when he shows up. But when I posted
him in the stories, people are like, oh, I know
him from TV, and I was like.
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Okay, so he got a real doctor.
Speaker 4 (39:30):
Doctor, he's a he's a doctor influencer or something like that.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Yeah, but he's actually he's I don't know. I haven't
been to his offices. I wouldn't know. Anyway, he does
come back, he comes back to office. Listen, I did
I did have my check check check ITCHI but uh yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was cool, you know Marie Howard. Wow.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
After he slept in my bed for like an hour
and a half and I was like, yo, I have.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
To you got to get out of here. We have
to go.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
And he was like, have you had a proper English breakfast,
and then he took me across the street. Urree, you
were so unseerious. You wasn't trying to go nowhere.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
You weren't trying to go home. They need to ask
you you want to extend your trade?
Speaker 1 (40:19):
Did ask me to extend my trip? He said, I'm
very spontaneous. I said, listen, I'm not extending my trip.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
Hey, sir, as a doctor, you cannot be spontaneous.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
You really need to be by the books. Okay, I'm
gonna call hippo. They got hip, but you can't.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
You don't know hip HOPA hi hi ho hip. But yeah,
he was like, yeah, I'll get you a new flight.
I said, well, I'm flying first class back, so you
have to get me a first class seat backset or
I said.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Don't do it. I was like no.
Speaker 1 (40:50):
We go across the street and it's the same place
I went. When I got there, the woman recognized me.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
The woman is like, welcome back. He goes, how many
are you niggas you had in here?
Speaker 1 (41:02):
I'm like, girl, yeah, dude, now just sit me, give
me give me that table that I got. Usually you are, bitch,
how you be a regular? You're there for how many
days girls a week? You're already a regular yo.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
In a week. She was like, welcome back in.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
I was like, oh girl, I barely remember the lady
and that's mess.
Speaker 3 (41:25):
I just want to let you know, ladies, when you're
working hostesses, Matred's whatever you are.
Speaker 4 (41:31):
If you see a gal come in with multiple niggas,
you don't.
Speaker 1 (41:34):
Know her, you don't know her, you have never seen
her in your day. Welcome for time. Yes, that's exactly
what you're about.
Speaker 2 (41:41):
Girls. Girl, that's a girl's girl. Anything other than that,
you're a hater. You're an op. You're not and be trusted.
You're goofy. You a op. She said, welcome back. I
walked and she said it los some dufis ashit. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:53):
But he was like he was like, yeah, we're gonna
do two English breakfasts. Breakfasts and then he ordered it
to quila. I said, is that a joke? Why would
you get a tequila for.
Speaker 3 (42:05):
We have to report him. I'm not playing like, there's
no reason why a doctor who's uh that successful and
well known should be having tequila?
Speaker 2 (42:17):
Is that early? I was like, what I said, did
you say to que what time is it? Uh?
Speaker 1 (42:22):
Probably like twelve something disgusting. Yeah, nasty, he said, I
already miss work. It was Monday, sir, gets your life together,
clean yourself in the week.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
He said, fuck it, we ball. He said, the boys.
Are you want to go hang out with the boys?
Speaker 1 (42:42):
I said, I got my bag with me because I'm
leaving today.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
Here, let's take the tube to the boys and then
we'll get you to the airport. I said, no, I'm
not taking the tube. I'm taking a car. He said, no,
no one takes a car to the airport in London.
Speaker 4 (42:57):
Yeah, he said, give me all this information.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
I'm going to report. Whatever you don't, I will because
this is ridiculous.
Speaker 1 (43:04):
Anyway, he professed his love to me, and he was like,
I can't believe I may you're so late.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
And you know, uh, I think you could be the
mother of my children.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
And that's also mess Sir.
Speaker 2 (43:16):
I don't know you. I was like, you're a long baby.
You're six foot six dude.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
He's Jack and the beanstock girl five four FuMB I said, listen,
next time I come back to London, I don't want
to see you in those pants.
Speaker 2 (43:29):
I need to see you in a looser girl.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
When I tell you. I was like, he basically had
on yoga pants.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
It looks like.
Speaker 1 (43:38):
He had on aloe yoga pant, had on Lulu Lemon
and Lula Lemon, Lula on that, but Lulu London. Yeah,
it was Lulu London.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
Great. That's also the title of the Yeah, Eddie, I
had a great time. I take the other one after
he brought me.
Speaker 1 (43:58):
Off and I said, I'm on the train and he
was like, a who's trying to take you on the
tube to the airport?
Speaker 2 (44:04):
And I was like, I know. But I went with
another with another friend and he was like, what friend?
Speaker 3 (44:09):
And I was like, a friend, when you told me,
you told him that you're on the.
Speaker 4 (44:14):
Tube, and the I thought, he was that's crazy, I'm
on the.
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Tube right now. I did keep thinking.
Speaker 1 (44:23):
I was like, what if he showed up to my
hotel to surprised me and take me to the airport
and I'm lingering with Jack and the beans.
Speaker 3 (44:29):
Nobody would do that except somebody that you already know that,
somebody that you used.
Speaker 2 (44:34):
Stand up anyway, I didn't get murdered. I met two
people that I like. I met a bunch of people
that I liked actually, but uh, yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (44:45):
They both have a messaged me on WhatsApp since I've
been back. One called me and listen you that you
that Penis reaper. You got your niggas like that? I said,
they on the landline. Hew, my lady, Hello, please connect
me to Marette Ray.
Speaker 2 (45:04):
Yo. When you got a nigga picking up the phone,
I got a call you dud don't even know how
to text?
Speaker 1 (45:14):
He said, Well, let me see what I gotta put
a plus one plus world. You got that good, good
and alcohol girl.
Speaker 2 (45:29):
Anyway, I'll have to say it was a great trip.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
And I want you Hays to know when a woman
says she had a great trip, that means she hooked
up with somebody and didn't get kidnapped.
Speaker 2 (45:36):
So that's what happened.
Speaker 1 (45:38):
So I love that for me and my sister's now like, oh,
I might go to Belgium for Thanksgiving, and I said.
Speaker 2 (45:45):
Oh, maybe maybe I'll come with you, because.
Speaker 4 (45:48):
That's not that's not that part.
Speaker 2 (45:49):
Maybe I go to London for a couple of days,
so we'll see. I think you should. I think you should.
Speaker 3 (45:57):
We we love when you do these adventures. I mean
they really just make my day and anybody who's listening
or I'm sure.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
They at the end of a seat like no, he
called what what did we learn here? What we learned
is if your single, always have a lighter on you
and a condom, because if you had that, you were
be tempted to use it. Yes, you don't have it,
then you gotta think about it.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
You have time.
Speaker 3 (46:21):
Because you he won't give you enough time to think
about He's already put his coat on.
Speaker 2 (46:25):
It ran out to the dam. He left his goat. Yo,
he left his goat. I'll be right back. I was like,
you're not coming back. You're not gonna have the room number?
What is it? Three? One three? I was like, whoo.
Speaker 1 (46:36):
So he might have been a little bit smarter than
we thought he was because he figured out all the
things that were tricks that I was about to pull.
Speaker 3 (46:45):
But yeah, shut out to this many eat prey here
situation e prey.
Speaker 2 (46:51):
Do do pray do? Yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
So the white woman who tried to steal my lighter
really popped my final night off for her the great way.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
What's her name, we don't know, we'll never know.
Speaker 1 (47:03):
I got in the car with them, and she never
She might have been my fairy godmother, my fairy dick mother.
Speaker 2 (47:08):
She's never fairy dick mother. Another title.
Speaker 3 (47:14):
Thank you so much for popping off our second season
with one of the best.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
We will catch up.
Speaker 3 (47:20):
We will have another episode obviously in episodes after that,
and so thank you for all that you do for us.
Speaker 2 (47:26):
Thank you for showing up to work sick. We had.
Speaker 3 (47:29):
We had to get the people that I had to
get this to them because when I heard it, I said.
Speaker 2 (47:33):
Everybody got to hear this. Sidney was screaming on the phone.
Speaker 1 (47:35):
I did, keep in mind, I did give her more
detailed explanation of everything.
Speaker 2 (47:39):
I don't deserve. Okay, but I don't know who's listening
to this. I mean it's a guy here.
Speaker 3 (47:43):
Yeah, maybe maybe we'll do some more stuff on the Patreon.
Speaker 2 (47:48):
Who knows. Come see us over there?
Speaker 3 (47:51):
Yeah, over there?
Speaker 2 (47:53):
All right, Well, this is how we wanted to pop
off the first one. And we have much much more
mess for y'all for the next year.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
And I'm excited to share that with y'all. So you
can see our faces while we talk.
Speaker 3 (48:07):
Yes, I and I will stay away from the five
hour energy shots so that I can be all that
I can be when I come back to the next episode.
Speaker 2 (48:15):
Well, yeah, I believe in your friend.
Speaker 3 (48:17):
Thanks, guys, don't forget to rate review I need more,
I need more reviews.
Speaker 2 (48:22):
We should already be past two.
Speaker 3 (48:24):
Thousand by now, we're not, So get them up, y'all
on what Spotify?
Speaker 2 (48:30):
On? On Spotify and Apple? What y'all doing? What y'all doing?
Y'all listening but not type a y y'all.
Speaker 4 (48:36):
Stay in the.
Speaker 2 (48:37):
Comments for Instagrams and TikTok.
Speaker 3 (48:38):
So do that work on where where the reviews and
comments matter?
Speaker 4 (48:42):
Okay, okay, yay, see you next time.
Speaker 2 (48:45):
Boy. Mess with Sydney Washington and Marie Foston is a
production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeartRadio podcast,
created and hosted by Sidney Washington and Marie Foston.
Speaker 1 (48:57):
Executive produce by Olivia Aguilar and Han Sonny, super produced
by Becca Ramos, Edited and mixed by Brian Jeffries.
Speaker 2 (49:04):
If you would like your messages read on air, please
email us at messthpodcast at gmail dot com, or call
for your messages to be played at seven six three
two eight zero six five eight eight
Hosts And Creators
Sydnee Washington
Marie Faustin
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