December 18, 2025 • 36 mins
It’s holiday seaz once again, and we don’t know about y’all — but we’ve been party hopping! As a sweet seasonal treat, we're resharing this very handy (and cutie and funny) episode from season one alllllll about Work Parties. Happy schmoozing! // The dreaded work party. It’s a party! There’s an open bar! But it’s also…work. How do you let loose and mingle freely when your boss is staring at you from behind the shrimp cocktail tower? This week Stephanie and Melissa discuss their Brooklyn 99 parties past and their struggles with striking the perfect professional balance at these events. Some takeaways: 1) No amount of free alcohol is worth getting fired. 2) Make a game plan before you go 3) Sometimes the answer is to simply sequester yourself in a corner with your friends
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Don't gossip.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Next next, next one, next one, more better.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Or better.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Better more welcome? Sorry, you know what this is, what
it is. It is what it is, guys. If you
don't know by now it you don't know me.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Okay, really off key, Welcome to More Better, a podcast
where we stop pretending to have it all together and
embrace the journey of being off key and becoming a
little more better every day, or at least trying to.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
That's Melissa Famiro. That's Stephanie Beatrice. Oh man, we're off
to a great start. Great start, great start, doing great.
We're doing great, Melsa, what have you done that's a
little more better? Let me just take that back, let
me let me try to more and better that okay,
hold on? Yeah, well Lissa, what have you done lately?
(01:09):
That's a little more better? That's natural, so natural, so natural.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Well, Stephanie, I literally can't think of anything because I'm
drowning currently.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
No, that sounds you know what. I'm just tired. My
More Better this week is just being okay with the
bare men of mum. We're just keeping it basic. That's
come up for air.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
That's good.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
What have you been doing, Stephanie?
Speaker 2 (01:47):
That's more better. Uh, you know, I am the opposite
right now. I don't have anything going on other than
like I am in a little bit of a waiting
game because my next job doesn't start for a little while.
So I took it upon myself to you know how
you read in the mom blogs and stuff that you're
supposed to cycle their toys out if you don't have kids.
(02:08):
What that means is to help them have a better brain.
I don't know, be a better human. I'm not sure
you're supposed to take some of their toys away and
put other ones out so they're not overwhelmed by like
a bunch of toys. And also you you like it's
like introducing new toys to them because they're kind of
(02:30):
goldfishy a little bit about toys, or like, well this
is new? What's this? So I've never done it before.
I did it today. I had some time. I took
a bunch of stuff out of her toys. I put
it in some bins. I moved them to the basement,
and uh, she didn't notice. I don't know is that
good or bad?
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Yeah? I know they want out of sight, out of mind,
like every kid at that age, every toddler, they'll just forget.
I love hiding things all the time. Joys that annoy me.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Yeah yeah, man, I mean fingers crossed. This child is.
This child is not barely playing by herself. She's like, Mommy,
you want to come and play with me. I'm like, man,
I get paid to play pretend. I don't want to
play pretend for free. I'm trying to do this every
day for free. I'm putting on voices, I'm doing an
old show.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
You know.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
That's how I feel. I can't do it. Bro, Are
you cutting me a check person? You know? Then the
answers no, yeah, more better. Speaking of work, that's what
we wanted to talk about this week. We're going to
be discussing work parties. I already feel anxious. How do
(03:48):
you feel about work parties? You know, you know, work
parties specifically, they are not regular parties, right, No, I
would say, like normally big work parties around the holidays, right.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
I feel like there's summer soys too, like summers of
the okay, big kind of time, or like if your
work has.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
Some kind of big event, like if you're going to oh, conventions, yeah,
we're going as convention and then on Friday, We're hosting
a dinner for everybody from blah blah blah. So come
on down to the TGI Fridays and hang out.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
The thing about it, though, is that you're not only
with friends, right, you're at work.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
You're at work, that's the thing. Yeah, You're not at
a party, You're at work. You're working. Do you like
work parties?
Speaker 2 (04:37):
I really struggle with this. I really struggle with this. Yeah,
and I've learned to do better at it as I've
gotten older. But like, the hard thing about them is
like they're with people from work, so like these are
sometimes the people that are going to give you another
(04:59):
job later. Maybe you know, for us, it's slightly different
because like for us, we really do go job to job. Yeah,
we'll not necessarily freelance, but we do kind of as actors,
we kind of function that way, whereas like we'll wrap
a job and then you know, we can go for
many years on that job. But then oftentimes we'll go
to another job, or we'll go to do a movie,
(05:21):
or we'll go to do something else in another forum
of this art forum. And so, like work parties, you
really partying with a lot of people who either are
in the cast or their crew or production.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Heads of studios, executives studios.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Sometimes, Oh my god. You know who's really good at
these Laura Ash She's great at a work party. She
knows everyone's name, she remembers everybody. I am not good
at it.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Bro, Bro, I'm not good at it.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Each I can't. I'm really bad at it.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
They make me feel really anxious.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
Yeah, I think same.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
I've gotten a little bit better over the years. I
remember the first few that we had to go to
for Brooklyn, like even my manager being like, maybe you
should have a drink, Like just have wondrink when you
get there, Just have one drink when you get there
to relax, yes, to just like kind of take an
edge off.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Right, But like if you're not drinking, I'm not drinking,
So like, right, I was super nervous about this rap
party because I was like, I can't have a beer.
I can't like do that right now, you know. But
from you know, it's a choice that I'm making. But
like it's definitely easy to lean on substances when you're
sort of feeling like, well, I feel nervous and I'm anxious.
(06:42):
You know, there's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
No, no, no, there's nothing wrong with that. But also
like you have to be careful too, because sometimes over
indulging at a work party is the most anxiety inducing
thing that could happen, of just being in the middle
of a work party and being like, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
I'm I'm drunk. Do you remember that first dinner we
went to, that very very first dinner that we went
to after I think we shot the pilot for Brooklyn? Yes, maybe,
do you remember what I'm talking about? Yeah, Yota, I think.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
It was Mozza in the Present Room.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Great wonderful restaurant here in La so good, really good,
like pizza Italian food, Nancy Silverton. Right, anyway, Yes, we
were at this work party and you know, for me,
I was really my first big TV thing that I'd
ever done, and so like I'd honestly never gone to
a dinner where like the studio was like paying for
(07:40):
the dinner, and it was like you can have whatever
you want to drink, you know, So I was like,
I'll get wine. Do you remember this. I had so
many glasses of wine because I was so nervous, and
I was sitting next to Mike Sure and I turned
to him. At one point I was like, I think
I've had too much to drink, and God bless Mike Sure.
He was like, you should go home now. Oh, you
(08:01):
should call a car and go home right now. And
I was like I should without saying goodbye. He was like,
you don't have to say goodbye, just go home. God
bless him, because I was ripped, ma'am. I was rip
I don't remember that. Did you just go disappear? Yeah?
I just left. I just left because I was like,
(08:23):
if Mike Sure says I should go home, I should
go home.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
I now remember that. Yeah, I think I do remember
turning around and being like, where's that go?
Speaker 2 (08:31):
Where'd she go? Because I had like a bottle of
wine by myself because I was so nervous. Yeah, ridiculous, ridiculous.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I also remember, uh, we would have to do these parties,
uh for oh god, people that are listening that are
not in this job that were. The TCAs were always
the biggest, most anxiety inducing kind of parties for me.
So the TCAs were like Television Critics Association have this
big party, uh twice a year. Right, there's like a
(09:04):
fall in a spring one and it's essentially this party
where you go and all the heads of studio were there,
and like everybody, you know, if it's Fox, all the
people from Fox shows are there. So it's full of
actors and it's full of journalists and they tell you
you will be on the record when you go to
this party, and you basically just make around and then
(09:25):
they give you alcohol and you walk around this party
and journalists just come up to you and they're like, so,
tell me about your show, and they'll just like it's
like random interviews. But then also sometimes you just are
having a conversation and halfway through you're like, wait, I'm
talking to a journalist.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Yeah this record, Yeah yeah, And then you're like, well,
what did I just say? But it's too comfortable, and.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Those were oh my god, I would be I think
that was one of the parties where my manager was like,
have a drink because like you need to relax, and
and you know, there was always that thing of like
make sure you go up and say hi to like
the heads of the studios, which is like the worst,
(10:09):
and I would always forget their names right as I
was going up, which is really really bad. And then
just like seeing actors from other shows, like I'm really
good with faces and not names, and I don't even
know how to get better at that. But it was
just awkward. And I felt awkward the whole time and
(10:33):
like sweating and just in this like high state of anxiety,
just trying not to like sound dumb or look dumb,
and just trying to relax and like have a good time.
And I remember there was one where we it was
like a few seasons in so we had done a
bunch of them, and I think we were all like
a little more comfortable with them now, but we basically
(10:56):
went to like the back of the restaurant and found
a corner and we all just hung out, like the
whole cast. We just hung out. Do you remember this?
Speaker 2 (11:08):
I don't remember that. Where were we? Do you? It
was like the one at the Soho House? Oh yeah,
you know what. I I don't remember that because I
was with Joel and Dirk eating with them at the
buffet at the dessert buvey, and I was eating with them.
We were just like standing there as close as we
could to the dessert eating. That's why I don't remember that.
(11:32):
I was like, where's everybody? Yeah? I thought it was
all of us.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
We were all just and then it was great because
imas were eating, we kind of some journalists came up
and talked to us. But I think that then as
a group we were I don't know if we were
like intimidating or like not that many people came up
to us and we just that's so funny, hung out
and ended up having like a great time. And I
was like, is that the answer just to quester.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Yourself so people in a corner?
Speaker 1 (12:02):
But probably not.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
I mean sometimes more better, more better. I think it
depends on what you want out of the party, you know.
Like that's the thing I think I've started to get to. Yeah,
and like as I get older, I'm like, okay, so
(12:25):
what is it that's making me anxious about this party?
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Right? So?
Speaker 2 (12:29):
Uh, because I'm gonna see all these people and like
I don't know if I have anything to talk to about.
It's like the thing that I have to remember is
every single person at that holiday party or at that
work party. It's like everybody there. First of all, sometimes
I get caught up in feeling like I'm responsible for
other people, Like, oh, I have to stay in this
(12:49):
conversation with this person, because like what if I leave
the conversation. I don't want to be rude, but everybody
at the party is like, oh, I want to talk
to multiple people at this party. Every single person that
came to that party wants to talk to a bunch
of people at that party, even if they're nervous, you
know what I mean. They want to see like their
work friends, they maybe want to like meet someone new,
(13:11):
they don't. They also don't want to be like stuck
in a conversation with you the whole time. So it's
like very freeing to be like I'm so glad that
I got to talk to you for a little while.
You know how these things are. I'm gonna go see
if they put more cheese out, or I'm gonna like,
I'm gonna go see if I can find so and so.
Like it's okay to leave the the one one. Yes,
(13:34):
I love. Giving my self permission to do that is big.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
I feel like, yeah, I've just started to get a
little bit better at that. But you hearing you just
say that out loud is like such a good reminder
of like, oh, yeah, I can just like have short
conversations and just be free of the expectation and understand
that like it's good for the other person too to
be like, hey, it was great to see you, and
(14:00):
what are your favorite like getting out of a conversation
kind like do you use like you just said, like
a food thing is a really good one, you know,
I think getting a drink to you, Oh you know
what I'm gonna I'm gonna go get another drink, Like yeah,
you know, I'll see in a bit.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
I appreciate the honesty of Like I was at a
work party the other day and I met this actress
that I really really liked, and we got along like
gangbusters and we were like having a great time and
then sort of not abruptly, but she was like, Okay,
so me and my husband are gonna we're gonna go
like see if we can talk to some more people.
(14:36):
It was so nice hanging out with you guys. I'm like,
I really appreciated how frank she was. She was just like,
we're gonna go do our rounds, because that's kind of
what you have to do with those work parties. You're
there to do your rounds, you know, And like I
just like I think it's you know, it's part it's
it's two parts of it, right, Like there's the I
want to be frank with people, and I also understand
(14:59):
that if somebody's with me, they're not being like you're
the worst, and I want to talk to you. It's like,
I'm not going to take that personally right. I'm gonna
be like, oh yeah, there's like fifty people here that
you probably need to talk to you before you leave
at least two, you know, at least two other people
you probably saw out of the corner of her eye,
and you want to make sure you say hi before
you go home super early. Because that's what I also
(15:19):
like to do at the work party. I like to
leave early. I didn't like to say to the end.
I like to get in and get out.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Be in that first shift. You know, yeah you get
there on time, leave an hour or two later, yes,
on time, and then get at.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
The other thing is like I like to have It
doesn't have to be like a notes list, but I
like to have a list in my mind of like, Okay,
I'm going to talk to this person. I want to
make sure I see this person. If if I see
this person, I want to like tap them on the
shoulder and be like, Hi, it's nice to see you,
(15:56):
or whatever, So like in my mind having a sort
of oh if I see so and so, I really
want to make sure I say this to them or.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
That to them or whatever, because that makes smart stuff. Yeah,
because you're going into it with like some goals, some markers,
and then once you hit those, you're like, Okay, I
did the thing I did the work party.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
If I'm having a good time, I can stay. But also,
like I released myself, I can go I have reel
good about this exactly.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Exactly, So this party, I really wanted to say hi
and by to Ted Danson, who is the lead in
this show that I just did a part in in
Icon Legend, Icon Legend fantastic wonderful human and I did.
I'm I like made sure that I like had like
I made time to like go back over to him
(16:45):
when I saw he wasn't busy. Yeah, And and also
like you can't really have too much shame about interrupting.
We're not in prege and prejudice, you know, like we're
not like you just have to be like tap tap yep,
Like maybe don't interrupt right as they're putting down the
fucking I I taped. I tapped him on the shoulder
and it was right when he was laying down the
(17:07):
punchline to a joke. And I was like, oh, sorry,
it was really bad. But how could you know? I mean,
I could have figured it out. I am also funny,
so I could have figured out like his gestures are
such that he's about to lay down the punchline. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
but that you know. And then my other like goal
(17:28):
that I had in my head was like, oh, get
this one person's phone number because you don't have it
and like you don't know when you're gonna see them again.
And I'm not on social media very much, so I
was like, I want to get her phone number before
I leave the party, and I did. And the other
goal was eat all the pretzels. Like they had a
They had little you know, those little soft pretzels. What
are they called. They're like sour dough saut you know
(17:49):
what I'm saying about. Yeah, get yeah, the big soft pretzels.
They had big soft pretzels. And I was like, you
get many big soft pretzels as possible. Yeah, So I
had a lot. Those were my goals for the party
and I did it.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
God, this is so smart. Okay, goals for a party,
being okay with being frank about short conversations with people.
These are hot tips.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
I am learning still being rude, but like, yeah, thanks.
I do. I do think, especially at work parties for us,
and I think for everybody, there's so many times where
it's like high emphasis is like there's an open bar,
there's free drinks. Yeah, it's like I would say, like
(18:36):
the main thing, as I said earlier, the main thing
for me is like don't get stupid. Don't get stupid
at the work party.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Don't You could.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
Go ahead and like go to it, like if you
really want to, you can go to another bar afterwards,
like that time that I was like, do you remember
that time? This was recent at a recent word party,
and I was like, do you guys want to go
to a second location? Remember that? Oh yeah yeah at
that party? Yeah, the Oscar party thing. And then I
was like, do you want to go to another place?
And you guys were like, we're gonna go home. I
(19:07):
was like, good for you.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
I wanted to go, but it was late, and we're
always thinking about how early our children wake up, and
so that makes us kind of lame. But then I
tell myself about my child, so no, your child sleeps,
your child sleep, Yeah, not anymore.
Speaker 2 (19:23):
She hit that two year old mark. I didn't care anymore.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
She's in that regression. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Yeah, she's in the she's in the fuck sleep.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
But my children wake up at like five thirty six am,
so that. But one day they will be older and
we can stay out later.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
But yes, yes, I do love. I do love a
post work party hang party.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Yeah, because at work, it's very At the work party,
it's like your bosses are there, you're you're you gotta
act right you were you know what I mean, Like
you gotta act right because I gotta. I don't want
to get fired because I'm dumb. Shit you did at
the work party. Like it's not worth it, you know,
it's not worth it. No amount of free alcohol is
worth getting fired.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
And everybody remembers the person who got stupid at the
work party.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Oh my god, it's so embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
It's so embarrassing.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Sometimes it's me. Sometimes I don't think it's ever been you.
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
What's your most memorable like Brooklyn, work party or work.
It doesn't have to be a Brooklyn one, but like,
do you have a work party that you were like,
this was amazing and I totally nailed it and I
had a great time and I was just like killing it.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
I was like, I don't know that, I know. I
don't think I ever feel like I'm really killing it
at a work party. But I also think like separating
the idea of like a party party from a work
party is really good for my brain. It's like, yeah,
there's certain pressures that are on a work party, like
your bosses are going to be there there, you might
need to like make an impression on people. But like
(21:00):
also if you put that much pressure on yourself about it,
it's like you're never going to succeed. And everybody at
that party except for like I don't know, you know,
j Low is like just as kind of like anxious
about the work party as you are, So like just
relax and also tell people that you like their work.
(21:23):
You know, like if there's someone at your party that
you'd like admire there, whatever it is, whatever job you have,
if there's somebody that you specifically are like, you're you
just such a great job, or I look up to
your work so much, or you know, I don't know
how you got to where you are, but like, if
you ever want to like have coffee, don't say pick
(21:43):
a brain because that's gross. But yeah, you know, that's
why I got that number because I wanted to talk
to that actress because she's a writer too, and I
just think she's so cool. And I was like, I
don't have a phone number. I'd really like to chat
with her, not necessarily because I want her to be
my mentor, although I think you could do that, I
think you can also just like talk to people that
you think as an equal. You want to like exchange
(22:06):
ideas about work outside of this work party situation.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
Yes, I one hundred percent agree that is such a
good point because I feel like I've gotten a little
bit better with that too, and it has led to
collaborations or friendships or yeah, I mean I used to
feel so weird. I think when I was starting out
being like I like your work, like I don't know,
like I was like afraid it made me look thirsty
or like something, you know, just like overthinking it, desperate
(22:33):
or you know. And then the first time I did
it was actually with phil Augusta Jackson, and it was
kind of a work party and he had like screened
some stuff and there was like a get together after,
but there was like a lot of people there and
it was at an agency, and I just went up
and I was like, I love what you do and
I'm like a fan, and I just if there's ever
(22:56):
a way that I could like support you or show
up for you, like, please let me know because I
really think you're so talented. And he immediately was like,
I have a short film I want to make. You
want to be in it? And I was like yes,
like and that was kind of like how our little
relationship started. Yeah, and it gave me so much courage
(23:18):
after that to be like, oh, just say it, Just
say the thing. Just tell people that you like what
they do. Like people like to hear that, and then
sometimes it leads to, you know, more and creative relationships
and collaboration and it can be amazing. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
I don't know. It doesn't have to be like a
thirsty thing, you know. I think some people circtly it's like, right,
we're not thirsty, but it's like what are you doing?
What are you? Oh yeah, no, please just like do
that gross. But when it comes from a real place
of like curiosity because you want to know what they're
creatively doing, you know, like what are you what is what?
(23:56):
Where's your brain like leading you? Like what is your
curiosity right now? What are you working on next? Like
what are you doing so that I can watch it
when it comes out or whatever? That's specific to us,
but like I do think it applies to a lot
of people. Yeah, I think, so more better, more better. Okay,
(24:19):
So I wanted to redo this thing from Forbes, which listen,
I don't read Forbes very much, but I was like
asking about holiday parties, office parties or whatever, and there
was this executive coach that wrote this article that's called
why your office holiday party is a secret evaluation and
possible job interview.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
I hate this already.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
I think it's so yuck to be like, okay, wait
this quote the office holiday party serves as a covert
evaluation of employees social skills, professionalism, and ability to navigate
informal settings. I advise you to prepare for your holiday
party in the same way you would a performance review
or in interview. Boom baboo.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
I hate that.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
I mean, I think that's too far. I don't know
the performance review or interview needs the same like intensity.
I think that's so yucky because like it's also like
a holiday party. It's like it's you know, not scrutinize
people in casuals. Can we just yeah? I mean I
(25:29):
get like people are gonna do that, but just like
be I hate that. I don't know that one. That's
so gross, right, It just that's gross thing that like
the the like like the kids say they gave me.
It comes from Love Island. You remember when I talked
about being being embarrassed that I watched Love Island. That's
(25:51):
where it came from. That's where it from. Just you know, America.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
I wouldn't know the origin of it without your love,
Islan love.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
I do think there's some some truth to it a
little bit, but like.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Uh well only as far as listen, if you act
a fool at the holiday party, yes, should you be
judged or like possibly evaluated, Sure, but sure I think
it's gross to have that approach. I feel like holiday
parties and work parties should also be just like places
(26:36):
to make connection bonding time, team building, you know, all
those cut like just a time to cut loose with
these people that you spend so many hours with in
a sensible professional way. Sure, Like I said, we don't
need to get stupid at the work party.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
We don't need to be ridiculous. It's not it's not
that kind of priorty.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
We don't have to get sloppy.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
But oh, to put this like pressure of like you're
being scrutinized.
Speaker 2 (27:09):
Or evaluated like a performance evaluated. Yike, smim, don't do
that to yourself. Don't do that to yourself now, because
I will say that's how I used to not exactly,
but I would put especially in the beginning of work
parties for me, like when I was entering into I'm
a responsible adult and now I'm getting a paycheck, now
(27:30):
I'm going to work parties. Yeah, I would put that
pressure on myself. I'd be like, oh my god, they're
gonna like they're gonna think of me as X Y
or Z or Like I remember being at a theater
in my early part of my career and hearing all
these like little whispers and stuff from other actors saying,
you know, you have to show up at the company
(27:52):
bar afterwards, and you have to schmooze, and that's how
you get cast, and this and that and I was like, Oh,
that's so stressful. Like I want to go to the
company bar to like hang out with my new friends
and like have some drinks and stuff. I don't want to,
you know. And this wasn't a work party. It was
more of like a social situation, you know, right, And
(28:13):
it's too much pressure to think about every single move
you're making. You could think about some of your moves,
but like I mean, like I didn't wear makeup to
that rap party.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
Don't be so calculated.
Speaker 2 (28:23):
Yeah, I didn't wear makeup to that rap party because
I didn't have time. I didn't have time. Good, good, good.
And I was like, uh, people are gonna know what
I look like. Oh that's true. They do. They already
know what you look like. It's fine.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
Well, before we wrap it up, I do have one
more fun thing that I wanted to read because our
producer isis she asked AI how to be better at
work parties? And I think that this list is hilarious
parts of it. So the first one is beyond time. Sure,
I think it's debatable because I think it's okay to
be fashionably late to a work party. Nobody wants to
be the frowd fashionally late. How late though, No, like
(29:00):
within the first half hour.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
Yeah. If it's a dinner, you need to be on time,
like you can be.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Dinner, you need to be on time. We both remember
a dinner we were invited to that I went. I
didn't know it was a sit down thing, and I
arrived actually, and it was very embarrassing to come into
the room with a big round table of people sitting down.
And thankfully I wasn't the last person to show up,
but I was a second.
Speaker 2 (29:24):
No, you were not to show up. Yeah, it was fine,
it was embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Uh, dress appropriately, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
Yeah, that one. Yeah, I don't want to, you know,
ask your if you're curious about what you is appropriate. Maybe,
you know, if if HR wouldn't appreciate you wearing it
to work, you probably shouldn't wear it to a work party.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
That's good, that's solid. Yeah. Uh, don't bring a guest
unless asked. That's yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
This is my favorite. Watch your guest behavior.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Do not bring that friend, lark, when are people? Okay,
Bill from Accounting had six beers.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
You guys, don't bring that friend. Okay, you know who
you you know who they are? Uh, snack before you go.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
I love that one actually, because I have definitely expected
a tree pass situation at a work party and been
sorely disappointed by the snacks.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
Yes, I have definitely showed up to a work party
ravenous and then looked like I don't know what, attacking
every plate that came out or whatever, small buffet and
just like a stockpile of a plate and being like maybe.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Fine, Yeah, the stockpile is actually totally fine. If people
are gonna judge you for how much you eat at
a work.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
No, I mean just more like not talking to anyone because.
Speaker 2 (31:04):
Yeah, that's not good, just not great. That's not great in.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Search of food because I arrived starving.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
One time I went to a fancy work party and
they had Trey pass uh little burgers raw they were raw.
Oh yeah, I had eaten half of one in the
dark before I realized it. I was like, this is weird. No,
it was bad. So eat before you go, Eat before
you go.
Speaker 1 (31:27):
That's a good tip. Uh, don't gossip.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
Next, next next one, next one.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Drink responsibly. We we yes, we discussed, we discussed, yes,
And then this one has a big question mark. Hold
your drink in your left hand.
Speaker 2 (31:46):
Why so you can shake hands with your right? Oh
is that? Why? Is that? Why?
Speaker 1 (31:53):
Probably you probably just nailed it.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
I like to have things in both hands so that
I'm I don't have to shake anyone's hands. Oh yeah,
that's and then I can be like, oh, sorry, I'm
holding my raw Berger.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
I know, in this post COVID world, I find it
very like, are we back to shaking hands. I've also
learned as an adult that, uh, when I was younger,
I just used to hug everyone without asking you.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
Oh my god, it's such a Latin thing, right, So
I just used to hug people and.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Oh my god, I've like kissed people on the cheek
without asking you because it's very Latin as well, and
like and then I, yeah, I have had to be like, oh,
well that makes some people very uncomfortable and like just
because it's my culture, like they shouldn't have to be
on physically uncomfortable because this is how I greet people.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Yeah, it's really real. You can't, you can't.
Speaker 1 (32:44):
Yeah. Yeah, I've gotten better about asking, you know, or
waiting to see you know that like awkward moment where
you're both you both go in for it and then
you're like, oh, no, do they like hugs? And then
I just go I'm a hugger. I like hugs, and
then the other person goes me too, and then you
do it.
Speaker 2 (33:00):
Oh that's nice.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
But yeah, but are we shaking hands? Are we back
to shaking hands? Because remember during COVID when like nobody
was shaking hands. Are we back to shaking hands?
Speaker 2 (33:09):
I think you can, Like, I think it's okay to say, like,
you know, what I do is oh I just sneezed,
or like, oh I just I just ate a burger,
so I'm not shaking hands, or like I do that
a lot. I'll be and it's usually pretty honest. I'm
like I just you know X y Z. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Yeah, but you're you're smart to have like, yeah, you're
both your hands occupied.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Yeah. I like to have them because I don't love
a shake hands situation. I do like a hug, but
I try to wait until the end of the conversation
to see if I feel comfortable enough approaching huh. So
in the beginning, I'll just like smile and be like, Hi,
it's so good to see you. Yeah that kind of thing.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
More better I feel I feel listen, I'm gonna ask you,
do you feel more better about work parties after this discussion?
Speaker 1 (34:02):
I do feel more better about work parties because I
got some real hot.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Tips from you, and I'm oh, thank you.
Speaker 1 (34:07):
I feel like they're a little less nerve wracking for me. Yeah,
after this conversation, do you feel more better about work
party glad?
Speaker 2 (34:16):
Yeah? I feel I mean, weirdly, I feel like the
stuff that I was doing was just to manage my
own anxiety. So it's nice to hear that it might
be helpful to you. You know. It's nice to hear
that because like I was just going, like, how can
I not be in my head this entire experience and
like actually be present? What can I do to be present?
(34:40):
You know? So it's nice to hear that it's helpful.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
Well, yeah, you were like very proactive about it, as
opposed to I've just been like floating through them, trying
to survive.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
Trying to break it down, to break it down into
little bitty pieces so I can crack the code. I
like it. I like it. They're good to tack code.
So yeah, well, we would love to hear about your
work parties because we'll be reroll honest, Like, this is
a very specific kind of work that we do, so
we want to know, like, is your work party super different?
(35:13):
Is it like really really casual? Is do the things
that we talked about apply to your you know, maybe
corporate maybe non corporate job? Like? Also, like did freelancers
get together and have work parties or is such as
a social party? I don't know, Let us know, Let.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Us know and we'll see you next week.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Yeah, bye guys, bye, More More Better. Do you have
something you'd like to be more better at that you
want us to talk about in a future episode?
Speaker 1 (35:39):
Can you relate to our struggles or have you tried
one of our tips and tricks?
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Shoot us your thoughts and ideas at Morebetter pod at
gmail dot com and conclude a voice note if you
want to be featured on the pod. Ooh, More Better
with Stephanie Melissa is a production from WV Sound and
iHeartMedia's My Kuntura podcast network, hosted by Me, Steffie Beatrice,
and Melissa Humero. More Better is produced by Isis Madrid,
Leo Clem, and Sophie Spencer Zabos. Our executive producers are
(36:06):
Wilmer Valderrama and Leo Clem at w V sound. This
episode was edited by Isis Madrid and engineered by Sean
Tracy and features original music by Madison Davenport and Hey
Loo boy Our.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Cover art is by Vincent Remis and photography by David Abolos.
For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
See you next week, Sugas Bye,
Don't gossip.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Next next, next one, next one, more better.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Or better.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Better more welcome? Sorry, you know what this is, what
it is. It is what it is, guys. If you
don't know by now it you don't know me.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Okay, really off key, Welcome to More Better, a podcast
where we stop pretending to have it all together and
embrace the journey of being off key and becoming a
little more better every day, or at least trying to.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
That's Melissa Famiro. That's Stephanie Beatrice. Oh man, we're off
to a great start. Great start, great start, doing great.
We're doing great, Melsa, what have you done that's a
little more better? Let me just take that back, let
me let me try to more and better that okay,
hold on? Yeah, well Lissa, what have you done lately?
(01:09):
That's a little more better? That's natural, so natural, so natural.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Well, Stephanie, I literally can't think of anything because I'm
drowning currently.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
No, that sounds you know what. I'm just tired. My
More Better this week is just being okay with the
bare men of mum. We're just keeping it basic. That's
come up for air.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
That's good.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
What have you been doing, Stephanie?
Speaker 2 (01:47):
That's more better. Uh, you know, I am the opposite
right now. I don't have anything going on other than
like I am in a little bit of a waiting
game because my next job doesn't start for a little while.
So I took it upon myself to you know how
you read in the mom blogs and stuff that you're
supposed to cycle their toys out if you don't have kids.
(02:08):
What that means is to help them have a better brain.
I don't know, be a better human. I'm not sure
you're supposed to take some of their toys away and
put other ones out so they're not overwhelmed by like
a bunch of toys. And also you you like it's
like introducing new toys to them because they're kind of
(02:30):
goldfishy a little bit about toys, or like, well this
is new? What's this? So I've never done it before.
I did it today. I had some time. I took
a bunch of stuff out of her toys. I put
it in some bins. I moved them to the basement,
and uh, she didn't notice. I don't know is that
good or bad?
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Yeah? I know they want out of sight, out of mind,
like every kid at that age, every toddler, they'll just forget.
I love hiding things all the time. Joys that annoy me.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Yeah yeah, man, I mean fingers crossed. This child is.
This child is not barely playing by herself. She's like, Mommy,
you want to come and play with me. I'm like, man,
I get paid to play pretend. I don't want to
play pretend for free. I'm trying to do this every
day for free. I'm putting on voices, I'm doing an
old show.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
You know.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
That's how I feel. I can't do it. Bro, Are
you cutting me a check person? You know? Then the
answers no, yeah, more better. Speaking of work, that's what
we wanted to talk about this week. We're going to
be discussing work parties. I already feel anxious. How do
(03:48):
you feel about work parties? You know, you know, work
parties specifically, they are not regular parties, right, No, I
would say, like normally big work parties around the holidays, right.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
I feel like there's summer soys too, like summers of
the okay, big kind of time, or like if your
work has.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
Some kind of big event, like if you're going to oh, conventions, yeah,
we're going as convention and then on Friday, We're hosting
a dinner for everybody from blah blah blah. So come
on down to the TGI Fridays and hang out.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
The thing about it, though, is that you're not only
with friends, right, you're at work.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
You're at work, that's the thing. Yeah, You're not at
a party, You're at work. You're working. Do you like
work parties?
Speaker 2 (04:37):
I really struggle with this. I really struggle with this. Yeah,
and I've learned to do better at it as I've
gotten older. But like, the hard thing about them is
like they're with people from work, so like these are
sometimes the people that are going to give you another
(04:59):
job later. Maybe you know, for us, it's slightly different
because like for us, we really do go job to job. Yeah,
we'll not necessarily freelance, but we do kind of as actors,
we kind of function that way, whereas like we'll wrap
a job and then you know, we can go for
many years on that job. But then oftentimes we'll go
to another job, or we'll go to do a movie,
(05:21):
or we'll go to do something else in another forum
of this art forum. And so, like work parties, you
really partying with a lot of people who either are
in the cast or their crew or production.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Heads of studios, executives studios.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Sometimes, Oh my god. You know who's really good at
these Laura Ash She's great at a work party. She
knows everyone's name, she remembers everybody. I am not good
at it.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Bro, Bro, I'm not good at it.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Each I can't. I'm really bad at it.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
They make me feel really anxious.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
Yeah, I think same.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
I've gotten a little bit better over the years. I
remember the first few that we had to go to
for Brooklyn, like even my manager being like, maybe you
should have a drink, Like just have wondrink when you
get there, Just have one drink when you get there
to relax, yes, to just like kind of take an
edge off.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Right, But like if you're not drinking, I'm not drinking,
So like, right, I was super nervous about this rap
party because I was like, I can't have a beer.
I can't like do that right now, you know. But
from you know, it's a choice that I'm making. But
like it's definitely easy to lean on substances when you're
sort of feeling like, well, I feel nervous and I'm anxious.
(06:42):
You know, there's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
No, no, no, there's nothing wrong with that. But also
like you have to be careful too, because sometimes over
indulging at a work party is the most anxiety inducing
thing that could happen, of just being in the middle
of a work party and being like, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
I'm I'm drunk. Do you remember that first dinner we
went to, that very very first dinner that we went
to after I think we shot the pilot for Brooklyn? Yes, maybe,
do you remember what I'm talking about? Yeah, Yota, I think.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
It was Mozza in the Present Room.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Great wonderful restaurant here in La so good, really good,
like pizza Italian food, Nancy Silverton. Right, anyway, Yes, we
were at this work party and you know, for me,
I was really my first big TV thing that I'd
ever done, and so like I'd honestly never gone to
a dinner where like the studio was like paying for
(07:40):
the dinner, and it was like you can have whatever
you want to drink, you know, So I was like,
I'll get wine. Do you remember this. I had so
many glasses of wine because I was so nervous, and
I was sitting next to Mike Sure and I turned
to him. At one point I was like, I think
I've had too much to drink, and God bless Mike Sure.
He was like, you should go home now. Oh, you
(08:01):
should call a car and go home right now. And
I was like I should without saying goodbye. He was like,
you don't have to say goodbye, just go home. God
bless him, because I was ripped, ma'am. I was rip
I don't remember that. Did you just go disappear? Yeah?
I just left. I just left because I was like,
(08:23):
if Mike Sure says I should go home, I should
go home.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
I now remember that. Yeah, I think I do remember
turning around and being like, where's that go?
Speaker 2 (08:31):
Where'd she go? Because I had like a bottle of
wine by myself because I was so nervous. Yeah, ridiculous, ridiculous.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I also remember, uh, we would have to do these parties,
uh for oh god, people that are listening that are
not in this job that were. The TCAs were always
the biggest, most anxiety inducing kind of parties for me.
So the TCAs were like Television Critics Association have this
big party, uh twice a year. Right, there's like a
(09:04):
fall in a spring one and it's essentially this party
where you go and all the heads of studio were there,
and like everybody, you know, if it's Fox, all the
people from Fox shows are there. So it's full of
actors and it's full of journalists and they tell you
you will be on the record when you go to
this party, and you basically just make around and then
(09:25):
they give you alcohol and you walk around this party
and journalists just come up to you and they're like, so,
tell me about your show, and they'll just like it's
like random interviews. But then also sometimes you just are
having a conversation and halfway through you're like, wait, I'm
talking to a journalist.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Yeah this record, Yeah yeah, And then you're like, well,
what did I just say? But it's too comfortable, and.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Those were oh my god, I would be I think
that was one of the parties where my manager was like,
have a drink because like you need to relax, and
and you know, there was always that thing of like
make sure you go up and say hi to like
the heads of the studios, which is like the worst,
(10:09):
and I would always forget their names right as I
was going up, which is really really bad. And then
just like seeing actors from other shows, like I'm really
good with faces and not names, and I don't even
know how to get better at that. But it was
just awkward. And I felt awkward the whole time and
(10:33):
like sweating and just in this like high state of anxiety,
just trying not to like sound dumb or look dumb,
and just trying to relax and like have a good time.
And I remember there was one where we it was
like a few seasons in so we had done a
bunch of them, and I think we were all like
a little more comfortable with them now, but we basically
(10:56):
went to like the back of the restaurant and found
a corner and we all just hung out, like the
whole cast. We just hung out. Do you remember this?
Speaker 2 (11:08):
I don't remember that. Where were we? Do you? It
was like the one at the Soho House? Oh yeah,
you know what. I I don't remember that because I
was with Joel and Dirk eating with them at the
buffet at the dessert buvey, and I was eating with them.
We were just like standing there as close as we
could to the dessert eating. That's why I don't remember that.
(11:32):
I was like, where's everybody? Yeah? I thought it was
all of us.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
We were all just and then it was great because
imas were eating, we kind of some journalists came up
and talked to us. But I think that then as
a group we were I don't know if we were
like intimidating or like not that many people came up
to us and we just that's so funny, hung out
and ended up having like a great time. And I
was like, is that the answer just to quester.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Yourself so people in a corner?
Speaker 1 (12:02):
But probably not.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
I mean sometimes more better, more better. I think it
depends on what you want out of the party, you know.
Like that's the thing I think I've started to get to. Yeah,
and like as I get older, I'm like, okay, so
(12:25):
what is it that's making me anxious about this party?
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Right? So?
Speaker 2 (12:29):
Uh, because I'm gonna see all these people and like
I don't know if I have anything to talk to about.
It's like the thing that I have to remember is
every single person at that holiday party or at that
work party. It's like everybody there. First of all, sometimes
I get caught up in feeling like I'm responsible for
other people, Like, oh, I have to stay in this
(12:49):
conversation with this person, because like what if I leave
the conversation. I don't want to be rude, but everybody
at the party is like, oh, I want to talk
to multiple people at this party. Every single person that
came to that party wants to talk to a bunch
of people at that party, even if they're nervous, you
know what I mean. They want to see like their
work friends, they maybe want to like meet someone new,
(13:11):
they don't. They also don't want to be like stuck
in a conversation with you the whole time. So it's
like very freeing to be like I'm so glad that
I got to talk to you for a little while.
You know how these things are. I'm gonna go see
if they put more cheese out, or I'm gonna like,
I'm gonna go see if I can find so and so.
Like it's okay to leave the the one one. Yes,
(13:34):
I love. Giving my self permission to do that is big.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
I feel like, yeah, I've just started to get a
little bit better at that. But you hearing you just
say that out loud is like such a good reminder
of like, oh, yeah, I can just like have short
conversations and just be free of the expectation and understand
that like it's good for the other person too to
be like, hey, it was great to see you, and
(14:00):
what are your favorite like getting out of a conversation
kind like do you use like you just said, like
a food thing is a really good one, you know,
I think getting a drink to you, Oh you know
what I'm gonna I'm gonna go get another drink, Like yeah,
you know, I'll see in a bit.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
I appreciate the honesty of Like I was at a
work party the other day and I met this actress
that I really really liked, and we got along like
gangbusters and we were like having a great time and
then sort of not abruptly, but she was like, Okay,
so me and my husband are gonna we're gonna go
like see if we can talk to some more people.
(14:36):
It was so nice hanging out with you guys. I'm like,
I really appreciated how frank she was. She was just like,
we're gonna go do our rounds, because that's kind of
what you have to do with those work parties. You're
there to do your rounds, you know, And like I
just like I think it's you know, it's part it's
it's two parts of it, right, Like there's the I
want to be frank with people, and I also understand
(14:59):
that if somebody's with me, they're not being like you're
the worst, and I want to talk to you. It's like,
I'm not going to take that personally right. I'm gonna
be like, oh yeah, there's like fifty people here that
you probably need to talk to you before you leave
at least two, you know, at least two other people
you probably saw out of the corner of her eye,
and you want to make sure you say hi before
you go home super early. Because that's what I also
(15:19):
like to do at the work party. I like to
leave early. I didn't like to say to the end.
I like to get in and get out.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Be in that first shift. You know, yeah you get
there on time, leave an hour or two later, yes,
on time, and then get at.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
The other thing is like I like to have It
doesn't have to be like a notes list, but I
like to have a list in my mind of like, Okay,
I'm going to talk to this person. I want to
make sure I see this person. If if I see
this person, I want to like tap them on the
shoulder and be like, Hi, it's nice to see you,
(15:56):
or whatever, So like in my mind having a sort
of oh if I see so and so, I really
want to make sure I say this to them or.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
That to them or whatever, because that makes smart stuff. Yeah,
because you're going into it with like some goals, some markers,
and then once you hit those, you're like, Okay, I
did the thing I did the work party.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
If I'm having a good time, I can stay. But also,
like I released myself, I can go I have reel
good about this exactly.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Exactly, So this party, I really wanted to say hi
and by to Ted Danson, who is the lead in
this show that I just did a part in in
Icon Legend, Icon Legend fantastic wonderful human and I did.
I'm I like made sure that I like had like
I made time to like go back over to him
(16:45):
when I saw he wasn't busy. Yeah, And and also
like you can't really have too much shame about interrupting.
We're not in prege and prejudice, you know, like we're
not like you just have to be like tap tap yep,
Like maybe don't interrupt right as they're putting down the
fucking I I taped. I tapped him on the shoulder
and it was right when he was laying down the
(17:07):
punchline to a joke. And I was like, oh, sorry,
it was really bad. But how could you know? I mean,
I could have figured it out. I am also funny,
so I could have figured out like his gestures are
such that he's about to lay down the punchline. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
but that you know. And then my other like goal
(17:28):
that I had in my head was like, oh, get
this one person's phone number because you don't have it
and like you don't know when you're gonna see them again.
And I'm not on social media very much, so I
was like, I want to get her phone number before
I leave the party, and I did. And the other
goal was eat all the pretzels. Like they had a
They had little you know, those little soft pretzels. What
are they called. They're like sour dough saut you know
(17:49):
what I'm saying about. Yeah, get yeah, the big soft pretzels.
They had big soft pretzels. And I was like, you
get many big soft pretzels as possible. Yeah, So I
had a lot. Those were my goals for the party
and I did it.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
God, this is so smart. Okay, goals for a party,
being okay with being frank about short conversations with people.
These are hot tips.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
I am learning still being rude, but like, yeah, thanks.
I do. I do think, especially at work parties for us,
and I think for everybody, there's so many times where
it's like high emphasis is like there's an open bar,
there's free drinks. Yeah, it's like I would say, like
(18:36):
the main thing, as I said earlier, the main thing
for me is like don't get stupid. Don't get stupid
at the work party.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Don't You could.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
Go ahead and like go to it, like if you
really want to, you can go to another bar afterwards,
like that time that I was like, do you remember
that time? This was recent at a recent word party,
and I was like, do you guys want to go
to a second location? Remember that? Oh yeah yeah at
that party? Yeah, the Oscar party thing. And then I
was like, do you want to go to another place?
And you guys were like, we're gonna go home. I
(19:07):
was like, good for you.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
I wanted to go, but it was late, and we're
always thinking about how early our children wake up, and
so that makes us kind of lame. But then I
tell myself about my child, so no, your child sleeps,
your child sleep, Yeah, not anymore.
Speaker 2 (19:23):
She hit that two year old mark. I didn't care anymore.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
She's in that regression. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Yeah, she's in the she's in the fuck sleep.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
But my children wake up at like five thirty six am,
so that. But one day they will be older and
we can stay out later.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
But yes, yes, I do love. I do love a
post work party hang party.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Yeah, because at work, it's very At the work party,
it's like your bosses are there, you're you're you gotta
act right you were you know what I mean, Like
you gotta act right because I gotta. I don't want
to get fired because I'm dumb. Shit you did at
the work party. Like it's not worth it, you know,
it's not worth it. No amount of free alcohol is
worth getting fired.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
And everybody remembers the person who got stupid at the
work party.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Oh my god, it's so embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
It's so embarrassing.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Sometimes it's me. Sometimes I don't think it's ever been you.
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
What's your most memorable like Brooklyn, work party or work.
It doesn't have to be a Brooklyn one, but like,
do you have a work party that you were like,
this was amazing and I totally nailed it and I
had a great time and I was just like killing it.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
I was like, I don't know that, I know. I
don't think I ever feel like I'm really killing it
at a work party. But I also think like separating
the idea of like a party party from a work
party is really good for my brain. It's like, yeah,
there's certain pressures that are on a work party, like
your bosses are going to be there there, you might
need to like make an impression on people. But like
(21:00):
also if you put that much pressure on yourself about it,
it's like you're never going to succeed. And everybody at
that party except for like I don't know, you know,
j Low is like just as kind of like anxious
about the work party as you are, So like just
relax and also tell people that you like their work.
(21:23):
You know, like if there's someone at your party that
you'd like admire there, whatever it is, whatever job you have,
if there's somebody that you specifically are like, you're you
just such a great job, or I look up to
your work so much, or you know, I don't know
how you got to where you are, but like, if
you ever want to like have coffee, don't say pick
(21:43):
a brain because that's gross. But yeah, you know, that's
why I got that number because I wanted to talk
to that actress because she's a writer too, and I
just think she's so cool. And I was like, I
don't have a phone number. I'd really like to chat
with her, not necessarily because I want her to be
my mentor, although I think you could do that, I
think you can also just like talk to people that
you think as an equal. You want to like exchange
(22:06):
ideas about work outside of this work party situation.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
Yes, I one hundred percent agree that is such a
good point because I feel like I've gotten a little
bit better with that too, and it has led to
collaborations or friendships or yeah, I mean I used to
feel so weird. I think when I was starting out
being like I like your work, like I don't know,
like I was like afraid it made me look thirsty
or like something, you know, just like overthinking it, desperate
(22:33):
or you know. And then the first time I did
it was actually with phil Augusta Jackson, and it was
kind of a work party and he had like screened
some stuff and there was like a get together after,
but there was like a lot of people there and
it was at an agency, and I just went up
and I was like, I love what you do and
I'm like a fan, and I just if there's ever
(22:56):
a way that I could like support you or show
up for you, like, please let me know because I
really think you're so talented. And he immediately was like,
I have a short film I want to make. You
want to be in it? And I was like yes,
like and that was kind of like how our little
relationship started. Yeah, and it gave me so much courage
(23:18):
after that to be like, oh, just say it, Just
say the thing. Just tell people that you like what
they do. Like people like to hear that, and then
sometimes it leads to, you know, more and creative relationships
and collaboration and it can be amazing. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
I don't know. It doesn't have to be like a
thirsty thing, you know. I think some people circtly it's like, right,
we're not thirsty, but it's like what are you doing?
What are you? Oh yeah, no, please just like do
that gross. But when it comes from a real place
of like curiosity because you want to know what they're
creatively doing, you know, like what are you what is what?
(23:56):
Where's your brain like leading you? Like what is your
curiosity right now? What are you working on next? Like
what are you doing so that I can watch it
when it comes out or whatever? That's specific to us,
but like I do think it applies to a lot
of people. Yeah, I think, so more better, more better. Okay,
(24:19):
So I wanted to redo this thing from Forbes, which listen,
I don't read Forbes very much, but I was like
asking about holiday parties, office parties or whatever, and there
was this executive coach that wrote this article that's called
why your office holiday party is a secret evaluation and
possible job interview.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
I hate this already.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
I think it's so yuck to be like, okay, wait
this quote the office holiday party serves as a covert
evaluation of employees social skills, professionalism, and ability to navigate
informal settings. I advise you to prepare for your holiday
party in the same way you would a performance review
or in interview. Boom baboo.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
I hate that.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
I mean, I think that's too far. I don't know
the performance review or interview needs the same like intensity.
I think that's so yucky because like it's also like
a holiday party. It's like it's you know, not scrutinize
people in casuals. Can we just yeah? I mean I
(25:29):
get like people are gonna do that, but just like
be I hate that. I don't know that one. That's
so gross, right, It just that's gross thing that like
the the like like the kids say they gave me.
It comes from Love Island. You remember when I talked
about being being embarrassed that I watched Love Island. That's
(25:51):
where it came from. That's where it from. Just you know, America.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
I wouldn't know the origin of it without your love,
Islan love.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
I do think there's some some truth to it a
little bit, but like.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Uh well only as far as listen, if you act
a fool at the holiday party, yes, should you be
judged or like possibly evaluated, Sure, but sure I think
it's gross to have that approach. I feel like holiday
parties and work parties should also be just like places
(26:36):
to make connection bonding time, team building, you know, all
those cut like just a time to cut loose with
these people that you spend so many hours with in
a sensible professional way. Sure, Like I said, we don't
need to get stupid at the work party.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
We don't need to be ridiculous. It's not it's not
that kind of priorty.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
We don't have to get sloppy.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
But oh, to put this like pressure of like you're
being scrutinized.
Speaker 2 (27:09):
Or evaluated like a performance evaluated. Yike, smim, don't do
that to yourself. Don't do that to yourself now, because
I will say that's how I used to not exactly,
but I would put especially in the beginning of work
parties for me, like when I was entering into I'm
a responsible adult and now I'm getting a paycheck, now
(27:30):
I'm going to work parties. Yeah, I would put that
pressure on myself. I'd be like, oh my god, they're
gonna like they're gonna think of me as X Y
or Z or Like I remember being at a theater
in my early part of my career and hearing all
these like little whispers and stuff from other actors saying,
you know, you have to show up at the company
(27:52):
bar afterwards, and you have to schmooze, and that's how
you get cast, and this and that and I was like, Oh,
that's so stressful. Like I want to go to the
company bar to like hang out with my new friends
and like have some drinks and stuff. I don't want to,
you know. And this wasn't a work party. It was
more of like a social situation, you know, right, And
(28:13):
it's too much pressure to think about every single move
you're making. You could think about some of your moves,
but like I mean, like I didn't wear makeup to
that rap party.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
Don't be so calculated.
Speaker 2 (28:23):
Yeah, I didn't wear makeup to that rap party because
I didn't have time. I didn't have time. Good, good, good.
And I was like, uh, people are gonna know what
I look like. Oh that's true. They do. They already
know what you look like. It's fine.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
Well, before we wrap it up, I do have one
more fun thing that I wanted to read because our
producer isis she asked AI how to be better at
work parties? And I think that this list is hilarious
parts of it. So the first one is beyond time. Sure,
I think it's debatable because I think it's okay to
be fashionably late to a work party. Nobody wants to
be the frowd fashionally late. How late though, No, like
(29:00):
within the first half hour.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
Yeah. If it's a dinner, you need to be on time,
like you can be.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Dinner, you need to be on time. We both remember
a dinner we were invited to that I went. I
didn't know it was a sit down thing, and I
arrived actually, and it was very embarrassing to come into
the room with a big round table of people sitting down.
And thankfully I wasn't the last person to show up,
but I was a second.
Speaker 2 (29:24):
No, you were not to show up. Yeah, it was fine,
it was embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Uh, dress appropriately, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
Yeah, that one. Yeah, I don't want to, you know,
ask your if you're curious about what you is appropriate. Maybe,
you know, if if HR wouldn't appreciate you wearing it
to work, you probably shouldn't wear it to a work party.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
That's good, that's solid. Yeah. Uh, don't bring a guest
unless asked. That's yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
This is my favorite. Watch your guest behavior.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Do not bring that friend, lark, when are people? Okay,
Bill from Accounting had six beers.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
You guys, don't bring that friend. Okay, you know who
you you know who they are? Uh, snack before you go.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
I love that one actually, because I have definitely expected
a tree pass situation at a work party and been
sorely disappointed by the snacks.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
Yes, I have definitely showed up to a work party
ravenous and then looked like I don't know what, attacking
every plate that came out or whatever, small buffet and
just like a stockpile of a plate and being like maybe.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Fine, Yeah, the stockpile is actually totally fine. If people
are gonna judge you for how much you eat at
a work.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
No, I mean just more like not talking to anyone because.
Speaker 2 (31:04):
Yeah, that's not good, just not great. That's not great in.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Search of food because I arrived starving.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
One time I went to a fancy work party and
they had Trey pass uh little burgers raw they were raw.
Oh yeah, I had eaten half of one in the
dark before I realized it. I was like, this is weird. No,
it was bad. So eat before you go, Eat before
you go.
Speaker 1 (31:27):
That's a good tip. Uh, don't gossip.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
Next, next next one, next one.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Drink responsibly. We we yes, we discussed, we discussed, yes,
And then this one has a big question mark. Hold
your drink in your left hand.
Speaker 2 (31:46):
Why so you can shake hands with your right? Oh
is that? Why? Is that? Why?
Speaker 1 (31:53):
Probably you probably just nailed it.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
I like to have things in both hands so that
I'm I don't have to shake anyone's hands. Oh yeah,
that's and then I can be like, oh, sorry, I'm
holding my raw Berger.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
I know, in this post COVID world, I find it
very like, are we back to shaking hands. I've also
learned as an adult that, uh, when I was younger,
I just used to hug everyone without asking you.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
Oh my god, it's such a Latin thing, right, So
I just used to hug people and.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Oh my god, I've like kissed people on the cheek
without asking you because it's very Latin as well, and
like and then I, yeah, I have had to be like, oh,
well that makes some people very uncomfortable and like just
because it's my culture, like they shouldn't have to be
on physically uncomfortable because this is how I greet people.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Yeah, it's really real. You can't, you can't.
Speaker 1 (32:44):
Yeah. Yeah, I've gotten better about asking, you know, or
waiting to see you know that like awkward moment where
you're both you both go in for it and then
you're like, oh, no, do they like hugs? And then
I just go I'm a hugger. I like hugs, and
then the other person goes me too, and then you
do it.
Speaker 2 (33:00):
Oh that's nice.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
But yeah, but are we shaking hands? Are we back
to shaking hands? Because remember during COVID when like nobody
was shaking hands. Are we back to shaking hands?
Speaker 2 (33:09):
I think you can, Like, I think it's okay to say, like,
you know, what I do is oh I just sneezed,
or like, oh I just I just ate a burger,
so I'm not shaking hands, or like I do that
a lot. I'll be and it's usually pretty honest. I'm
like I just you know X y Z. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Yeah, but you're you're smart to have like, yeah, you're
both your hands occupied.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Yeah. I like to have them because I don't love
a shake hands situation. I do like a hug, but
I try to wait until the end of the conversation
to see if I feel comfortable enough approaching huh. So
in the beginning, I'll just like smile and be like, Hi,
it's so good to see you. Yeah that kind of thing.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
More better I feel I feel listen, I'm gonna ask you,
do you feel more better about work parties after this discussion?
Speaker 1 (34:02):
I do feel more better about work parties because I
got some real hot.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Tips from you, and I'm oh, thank you.
Speaker 1 (34:07):
I feel like they're a little less nerve wracking for me. Yeah,
after this conversation, do you feel more better about work
party glad?
Speaker 2 (34:16):
Yeah? I feel I mean, weirdly, I feel like the
stuff that I was doing was just to manage my
own anxiety. So it's nice to hear that it might
be helpful to you. You know. It's nice to hear
that because like I was just going, like, how can
I not be in my head this entire experience and
like actually be present? What can I do to be present?
(34:40):
You know? So it's nice to hear that it's helpful.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
Well, yeah, you were like very proactive about it, as
opposed to I've just been like floating through them, trying
to survive.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
Trying to break it down, to break it down into
little bitty pieces so I can crack the code. I
like it. I like it. They're good to tack code.
So yeah, well, we would love to hear about your
work parties because we'll be reroll honest, Like, this is
a very specific kind of work that we do, so
we want to know, like, is your work party super different?
(35:13):
Is it like really really casual? Is do the things
that we talked about apply to your you know, maybe
corporate maybe non corporate job? Like? Also, like did freelancers
get together and have work parties or is such as
a social party? I don't know, Let us know, Let.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Us know and we'll see you next week.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Yeah, bye guys, bye, More More Better. Do you have
something you'd like to be more better at that you
want us to talk about in a future episode?
Speaker 1 (35:39):
Can you relate to our struggles or have you tried
one of our tips and tricks?
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Shoot us your thoughts and ideas at Morebetter pod at
gmail dot com and conclude a voice note if you
want to be featured on the pod. Ooh, More Better
with Stephanie Melissa is a production from WV Sound and
iHeartMedia's My Kuntura podcast network, hosted by Me, Steffie Beatrice,
and Melissa Humero. More Better is produced by Isis Madrid,
Leo Clem, and Sophie Spencer Zabos. Our executive producers are
(36:06):
Wilmer Valderrama and Leo Clem at w V sound. This
episode was edited by Isis Madrid and engineered by Sean
Tracy and features original music by Madison Davenport and Hey
Loo boy Our.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Cover art is by Vincent Remis and photography by David Abolos.
For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
See you next week, Sugas Bye,
Hosts And Creators
Stephanie Beatriz
Melissa Fumero
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.