October 4, 2022 • 38 mins
Who is the American dream really for? That's what Darilyn Castillo is getting to the bottom of. Join the as she sits down with Rafael Augstín. We discuss life as a TV writer and writing himself into existence, his time on the award-winning TV show 'Jane the Virgin', and his hilariously uplifting and touching memoir 'Illegally Yours: A Memoir', available now!
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh yeah, me hint there. I just want to give
you a heads up. The program you are about to
hear may have some explicit language, it may not. It
also depends on where the vibes and the spirit leads us.
Hope you enjoy Welcome to more Anita, a deep dive
into the Latin X experience. With more Anita, we want
(00:22):
to create a community and a shared space with you
while sharing knowledge and inspiration. This show is about celebrating
our culture with guests who exemplify the best of us.
I'm Darrylene Gastillo Bethane Beetle. All right, y'all, this week
you have to use your imagination. Imagine you are brought
(00:46):
to a country thinking that you are just going for
a vacation, just to visit some family and see the sites. Now,
imagine you never ever go back home without any explanation
and from anyone around you, and you yourself finally coming
to the realization that this vacation place, this place you
(01:08):
were supposed to just pass by, is now your new home.
On top of this new home that you must adjust to,
you then come to find out later in your life
that you are actually undocumented. This place that you have
worked years into trying to recreate as your home. You
were never even invited to stay. A seat at the
(01:30):
table was never even prepared for you. Rafael Agostine, TV
writer from the award winning show Jane the Virgin, shares
with us in this incredible interview a memoir that he
has written called Illegally Yours. This book gives us a
front seat into Rafael's experience on how he accidentally discovered
(01:52):
he was undocumented and how this changed everything he thought
he kneeled about himself and his family. It challenges the
question what does it mean to be an American? For me?
After reading it, the question that landed heavy was who
is the American dream really for? Okay, I'll drop the
(02:13):
serious tone because honestly, this book, though it made me
tear up multiple times, it also made me laugh out
loud l O L. You'll get it as you keep listening.
But like, seriously, half Ile's writing is next level. I
don't know how someone can take something so traumatic, something
so scary, something so heartbreaking, and turn it into a comical,
(02:37):
heartwarming masterpiece. I think what truly makes it comical is
it's honesty. Some of it really makes you repeat to yourself. Damn,
this really happened. Illegally Yours is nothing but honest and
half Ile's words hit you in so many ways, and
they come from so many angles you don't even see
(02:58):
it coming. So prepare yourself for this one, the ride
through Illegally Yours being people Rafael. Oh yeah, welcome to
Oh my god, thank you for having me. It's so exciting.
(03:18):
I'm so excited because, um, well, being a fan of
your work and then to see your name pop up
in my email from my manager, I was like, I
wrote a book. I did. It's it's incredible. Um. It's
called Illegally Yours. Um, and it's a memoir and um,
(03:40):
first off, the cover. Okay, can we talk about the cover,
the storytelling because this is this is it's eye catching,
thank you, you know, believe it or not. That's the
first picture my parents and I ever took in this
country together. So when we started discussing the cover, I said,
I'm not sure what we can do, but I want
this picture to be used. Uh. And then when we
(04:03):
use that picture, I said, I wanted to cover my
parents eyes in a way of trying to protect their identity.
And then the idea of doing it with the stars
with the stars from the American flag worked so well
because I don't know, you hiding their identity, but it's
clear they have like the American dreams in their their
pych It's yeah, perfect. I already like I knew what
(04:23):
I already knew what I was getting right when it
landed in Um. And then, I mean, by the way,
I was Emo before Emo was a thing. Look at that. So,
I mean I opened the book, and um, I was
really busy. And I'm the kind of reader where like
I read seven books at a time. I don't know,
(04:46):
you know, I read and then I never finished them.
They just you're terrible. It kind of wrote it, you
know here. I was very impressed by your reading skills. Um,
My mom is a writer, so like, you know, I
would just read and read and read growing up, and
I don't know, I just I guess as I got older,
I'm like, oh, I'm bored with that book with me,
like you know, move on and move on. And I
sat down with your book and I read it in
(05:07):
two days. It's so good, Raphael. I mean I laughed
a lot. I even wrote and trying to like find
like little spots I wrote like l O L in
all the places that I thought were really funny, and
then I stopped writing L L because like after every sentence,
I was like, Okay, okay, it's giving comedy. It's giving comedy.
(05:29):
It's giving um just so many like memories for myself,
within my family and within my friends stories and my
families stories. Um, and then it's giving tears. You like
hit me with the left punch on that one. I
was like crying in bed and my fiance is like,
are you crying. I'm like yeah, like it got me. Um. Well,
(05:55):
first and foremost, let me say that it was very
important to me that I wrote it as a comedy.
I think so many times we have like trauma porn
in our in our TV and our books and the
woe is Me narrative, but that's not our community. Like, yeah,
we go through hardships and yeah, there's some very very
tough circumstances that we have to overcome, but we always
(06:16):
find the joy in the humor in life. And that's
what I wanted to like incorporate in the book, Like,
despite how terrible our existence is, undocumented Americans were in
the United States, we still laugh and had so much fun.
You definitely did. And I'm just before we dive into
what the book is about, I'd love for you to
(06:39):
let me and the listeners know, um, because it was
just something that immediately came to my mind while I
was reading it. I just was, what drew you to
write the book? Was this the COVID project? Was this, uh,
something you've been working on for years and years and years.
You've just been writing a little pieces here and there.
What led you to finally, you know, do the thing? Wow?
I feel like my entire your career um can be
(07:02):
summarized by me insisting on writing myself into existence. Ever
ever since I was like at U c l A
and I was like not getting by the way. I
went to U Cilia on an acting scholarship, quickly realized
they're like no rules for like minorities that alone Latinos
and Latina. So I started That's how we came out
of play, right, That's how I started writing stuff. Um.
So even back then, I used to just have the
(07:24):
mantra I have to write myself into existence. And this
book was actually a TV pilot from many years ago.
It was like realizing that I wanted to tell my
parents story, my journey of coming to the United States,
my journey of discovering that I was undocumented while in
high school, Like super late in the game. Uh, when
(07:45):
I decided to write that as a TV pilot, that
script is what made me a Sun Dance Institute episodic fellow.
That script got me my first Hollywood TV agent. That
script got me in my first TV writer's room. That
script got me my first TV cell with CBS Studios
UM And then you know, you go through the system
(08:05):
and sometimes projects get picked up or they or they
die in development. And when that script didn't move forward
to a TV show, I kind of felt like I
felt like the story was too important not to share.
So I was like, that's okay, if it's not a
TV I'll just write as a book. And there's so
much There was so many anecdotes that I couldn't tell
(08:26):
in the pilot that we were writing that I figured
that maybe the book is the best way of telling
the story. And then you're right. It was because of
COVID is because of the Great Pause. It was the
the world coming to to a halt and me realizing, oh,
I've been like in this rat race for so long.
I've been working NonStop for like four or five years.
(08:49):
What what do I want my legacy to be on
this earth? What do I want to say? And what
do I want to leave behind? That's when I went
back to the TV pilot and I was like, oh,
you know what, I'm going to write it as a book.
And I created a book proposal. I got a book agent,
a badass Latino from New York. Uh, and then we
got a book deal out of it. And Yeah, honestly,
(09:11):
if it wasn't for the pandemic, I don't know if
I would have had the time to sit down and
write the book. Yeah. Yeah, Um, I think that a
lot of us artists definitely so a lot from be
impacted from COVID and what that really did for us
and sitting in silence kind of and and what are
we going to do now kind of feelings? Um? In
(09:34):
your words, I just just because I'm I mean, i
could sit here and talk about the book chapter by chapter.
I'm talking about the book word for word, but L
O L but I'm curious, um in your words, like
what is what is illegally yours about it? You know? UM?
(09:56):
I describe it as a comedic coming of age more
about an all American family that just happens to be undocumented.
That's the thing like I really wanted, I say, general
market audiences, but you know, white people, white people to read,
to read this book and be like, oh my god,
(10:16):
this family sounds just like mine, or at the very least,
I couldn't relate to their hopes, their dreams, aspirations and everything. Um,
you know, my my my framing device was always like
my life felt like the sitcom growing up, So how
does that sit come play out? That was how I
wanted to write and attack the book. And um, there's
(10:39):
one thing that I didn't mention that I really loved
about your book, Um, you teach in the book. There's
a lot of the splintingint I mean, there's a lot
of educating and teaching moments that I think, Um, yeah,
I think a white audience can be if it from.
(11:00):
But also I also think our community can benefit from
as Latina people and and and American you know American
Latina people. I think, Um, something that really fascinated me
about you and can I call you? Yeah, of course, okay,
something that I really connected with you about and something
that I was very surprised about. And I've been speaking
(11:22):
about it with my fiance here he's Colombian, and with
his family. But I related so much to this sense
of awareness that you've always had in your book, in
your in your life. And something that like really stuck
out to me was a sentence that you had mentioned
when you had landed in Madrid Finally. I won't I
(11:44):
won't spoil the juice, but it's it's a juicy story
that you know, you ended up in kind of immigration jail,
and um, you finally were aver. You finally were able
to um go to Madrid and and land there and
walk outside, and you had a very open eyed realization
(12:06):
of the white tourists all around you and the lack
of um color just in that moment. And there's so
many moments of this in the book that I don't
know why. It just really stuck out to me, because,
as I mean, we being round, and I used to
travel a lot when I was younger, and and I
have family in Spain, so I remember that same moment
(12:28):
you're talking about and being like, oh, where is everybody?
Because it's something that I've always questioned for myself, and
I even asked my parents, like, how did you instill
that awareness in me? What is that? And where did
that come from? And I'm curious for you, where do
you think that came from for you? Because it's something that, yeah,
(12:51):
it can it can be, it can be taught, but
it's something to me that I think it's more felt. Wow,
I have to say that probably comes from my mom.
My mom loves everybody and she has such a big
open heart that I like, it was hard for me
to make those barriers for myself with people of different
you know, ethnicities and color in my life. To me,
(13:12):
they were all my brothers and sisters. Um, but you
hit on something in the book that my my book
editor tried to get me away from because it was
so much easier for me to frame this book as
the lessons that I learned, Right, That's what I wanted
to share, and she was like, no, that's boring. You
have to like I had that within the storytelling. So
it's funny that you picked up on that because every
(13:34):
chapter I was like, what did I agree from all this?
You know? Um, but I have a great friend and mentor.
His name is jos Antonio Vargas uh pull A surprise,
winning on he came out his own documented on the
cover of Time magazine, Right the Filipino American UM. He
told me, the problem with people like us, like the
(13:56):
people who are socially conscious, the woke right, is that
we tend to lead with our politics because we enter
rooms where there's no one else like us, so we
kind of like overcompensate. So early early on, he always
told me it's important that people like us lead with
our hearts and not our politics. And that's what this
book was for me. I was like, how can I
(14:18):
lead with imagine talking about immigration and talk about undocumented Americans.
It's already so like politically charged that it was important
to lead with my heart. It was important to lead
with the humor in the comedy so that it's easier
for everyone else who might not be on document or
might not have anybody who's on document in their family,
can come to this story and see us as people. Right.
(14:40):
And this is something I learned from Jenny Snyder Ermine
that the creator of Jane the Virgin. She said, people
can ignore topics, people can ignore politics, people can ignore issues,
but people can ignore other people. M Uh, this book
(15:01):
is is um I felt your heart out reading it.
I really did. I really did not too gloss over it,
but you mentioned that the Spain, the Spain thing that
(15:23):
was the my God. And again not not too many
spoiler alerts here, but I do open up the book
with me being deported from Spain and then when I
when I taken to the Spanish prison at the airport,
it's me and a bunch of black people. They just
happened to be from Venezuela and Colombia and Cuba, but
(15:45):
they were all black. And that was just so shocking
to me that it didn't matter where you went in
the world, like your black skin was gonna be a
detriment to your peaceful existence. And I needed to see
that because I would see that in and films and
TVs in the United States, but to see it at
international waters as well, I was like, what is going on? Yeah?
(16:10):
And if I may add um because the very first
chapter I get to it, I was the my The
biggest shock in my life was discovering I was on
document in high school. But the first big reveal and
shock for me was discovering that I wasn't white. And
that happened to me right away when I got to
this country because I grew up thinking I was just
a regular white kid with the beautiful olive ted you know,
(16:32):
and living in my grandparents big house in Ecuador, South America,
and growing up with like maids and chauffeurs. And then
I come to the United States and I moved into
my aunt's garage and I'm like, okay, so here the
United States, we're the maids and chauffeurs. And then I
go to my first day of public school in this country,
(16:52):
and it was a reality I had not seen in
all the films and TVs that I watched in eperor
from the United States. Every when I saw on the
screen was blonde and blue eyed, and that's what I
thought America was. So when I saw the great diversity
in this country, I was like, what the hell is
what's going on here? The one thing that was really
(17:16):
I mean, I'm a theater I'm a theater girl, and
you know, turned onto TV film and this nut and
understanding that I love it. I loved reading that like
you're you were, you know, a theater was like. And
also hearing that like in l a like hearing that
kind of energy that was surrounding the work you were
doing and the work you were starting. That's refreshing, first off,
(17:38):
because I guess we don't really get that part because
you know, obviously illegally yours part two is not coming
out just yet, right, Um, what was the jump from
there to TV and film? Was that just because you
were in Cali and it just kind of fell into
that or like, what was that for you? That's no? Um,
So I can honestly say that my immigration problems are
(18:00):
would led me to this career and led me into
the arts because I come from a long line of
doctors and lawyers, right, so maybe that was gonna be
my path. But with my immigration problems and I couldn't
get financiality, Um, I couldn't get any type of support.
I had no direction. I ended up at community college
here in California, and because I had no idea how
(18:20):
long my immigration limbo would last, I took every class
that that community college had to offer. Literally went down
in alphabetic border. I was like a for anthropology, be
for biology, see for chemistry. Think about how many classes
I took before I got to tea in theater A million?
And then it was in that class where I first
started to find my self worth and my self esteem
(18:44):
and my self respect, because there's something interesting about secretly
needing that love from your community, feeling mothered, feeling like
you're not wanted in this country, and then all of
a sudden, you're on the stage and people are admiring
you and loving you and clapping for you. And I
was like, oh my god, I need this. I don't
even I didn't even know why I needed it, but
(19:06):
I needed it. And like I say in the book,
I had been acting American my whole life, so the
acting seemed like natural to me, but it was what
I did. So I started doing theater community college, transferred
to u c l A School Theater, Film, and Television,
continue to do theater again, writing myself into existence. I
started writing my own comedy shows and it was one
(19:26):
of those comedy shows that I toured the nation with
that eventually got picked up for TV development. So I
transitioned from theater to TV because I created a play
that everyone wanted to exploit and it was that simple. Again,
Hollywood people try to make it seem like, Oh, it's
the agents that run this town, or it's the producers,
(19:48):
is the business, is the lawyers? That's all bullshit. Hollywood
runs on story period. They might call it I P
everyone calls it intellectual property. That's that's another fancy way
of saying story. So if you wrote a book, if
you wrote a play, if you wrote a comic book,
if you have a podcast, if you have something that
people want to exploit, you have all the power in
(20:09):
this town. So that I realized that with the play
that I wrote, everyone wanted to adapt it into a
TV show. And that was my first experience. Granted I
was too young, too young, and too inexperienced, so it
was a ship show for me because I didn't fight
for my voice, or even worse, I was an immigrant
(20:30):
and I was a people pleaser. So when you're in
the middle of that TV machinery, if you don't fight
for your vision and you don't fight for your voice,
it's just gonna be like a Frankenstein thing with your
name on it that you're not even gonna like, right,
And that was that was my biggest lesson in Hollywood.
Success has many parents, but failure is an orphan. When
(20:56):
that show that we adapted didn't work, it was my fault.
It didn't matter it that I listened to every showrunner, producer, director,
TV executive to make sure they were happy. When it
didn't work, it was my fault. And again I was like, man,
maybe I don't belong in this town. Maybe I should
just stick to doing plays in theater. Gave this is crazy,
(21:17):
So you realize it's like, oh, it's just this is
what it is. This is what it is. Yeah, this
is just what it is. And I'm just until I
realized if I'm going to fail, I want to fail
by my choices and by my merits, which is why
I decided to write that TV pilot because I was like, Okay,
this thing didn't work and I played it by your rules.
So now I'm going to create something on my own
(21:38):
that could also could probably suck, but at least if
it fails, I know I did everything I could. You
did it. Yeah, I think that that's what a lot
of and it's just something that a lot of my
lapina for an act fellow actors, you know, we all
struggle with that same thing or speaking about where it's like, oh,
(21:59):
I guess we got to write our own stories because
at the end of the day, you know, I mean,
I'm just going to keep being overlooked, right or overviewed
if I don't start taking control. I mean obviously in
imposter syndrome and like all that and um, but it's like, oh,
is what I have to say enough? Like, it's what
I have to offer as an artist, as a human
(22:20):
being enough. I think a lot of especially Latino artists
you know, struggle with that. Um. Well, let this podcast
be a testament to what what you have to say
and what you bring to the table is enough. Yeah. Absolutely,
it's a it's a reminder and all that. And I've
spoken to a lot of like, especially like aspiring artists
(22:41):
and theater students throughout my years, and I always tell
them the best thing you could do is learn how
to write, because you will never go without work if
you know how to write, because you can always right
yourself into existence, into existence. Um. And even that, there's
a moment in the book where you you discussed like
the struggle of Okay, well, and I'd hit me hard
because I'm like, yeah, totally, Um, the placement of Latino
(23:05):
people in this country and what does that actually mean
in creating space for ourselves where you know, you came,
you came to this country and you're like, oh, the
black people have that. White people got this, but what
about us where we go? Um? And I think that's
always just I think, no matter if you're after Latino,
if you're white, let me know if there's always that
feeling of like where do I fit? And race in
(23:30):
America is so tough, it's so tough to talk about.
It's so tough to understand if you don't fit perfectly
in that black and white dichotomy. Um, after all of
these years, to me, race is and has always been
a social construct, right. The problem is that even though
race is not real, racism is very real. So you
(23:52):
need the concept of race just to understand the impact
of racism. It's so it's such a mindful to me, absolutely,
And then it's also then then you know the community,
the Latina community then wants to deny it. It's just
they don't want to be a part of it. Or
people sometimes racist. I'm like Jesus Christ, what's wrong with you?
(24:13):
Which leads me into another sector of this interview with you,
where you are today and what you're seeing in the
industry now, and if you're seeing some kind of difference
in some kind of change, in any kind of way
in the work that you've been doing and the access
that you have, has there been changed. Do you think
(24:35):
it's enough? What do you think on your ends we
need to do? And I say this too as like
you know, as an Afro Latina actress. Yeah, I've I've
seen a couple of things. Yeah, I've been in for
like finally I'm getting in for the series regulars and
I'm doing that. I'm having this conversation and I'm bringing
that into the audition, But at the end of the day,
they're still booking the white girl, you know, So it's
like what or not even the white the white latina,
(24:57):
right or or that or this. So like I'm curious
for you as being someone who's in the room where
it happens, I'm curious for you, like what has that
been like, especially reading this book and your experiences, because
there's someone who's very aware things are painfully slowly getting better.
(25:20):
It's not by any means where it needs to be.
And a lot of the times casting is the first
place where we can start seeing some positive change. But
we're talking about structural power in Hollywood that we have
to change. We need more executives and positions of power,
more producers and positions of power. Um, we need more
(25:40):
like directors and writers, you know, and we don't have
enough of that. So that's what I'm hoping we continue
to develop. I remind people that we had better representation
in the nineteen fifties and everyone in the mayor Erica
was accustomed to having a Latino in their living room
(26:03):
every day and the biggest hit show in the country,
and that's I Love Lucy, that's Naisi Ernest and I
Love Lucy. And we're just trying to get back to that, right.
Um yeah, I mean we've had slow progress and it
needs to get better, but it's not by any means
(26:27):
where it needs to be, right, especially in Hollywood, especially
in Los Angeles. As close to like fifty percent Latinos
in this county where Hollywood resides, and yet we're like
five percent of the speaking roles or maybe fifteen percent
of the workforce here. And that's that's like below the line.
(26:53):
When it comes to above the line and it comes
to executives, god, we're probably like three percent or at mo.
That's those are disgusting numbers. That's that's structural racism that
no one really wants to talk about absolutely, but you know,
we we the best we could do is tell our stories,
(27:14):
be the difference we want to see in the world.
Keep showing up and keep showing up. You know you
said something at the at the beginning of this question
that really hit me. I got into a big fight
with the bunch of my friends not too long ago
because I said, listen, you can be Latin X and
not be a person of color, and they were like,
what are you saying? I I acknowledge my privilege, and
(27:40):
I also acknowledge that there's some of us in our
community that are saying, oh my god, what is me?
I'm a person of color and you're blond and blue eyed,
and I'm like, what on your experience? Not not all
experiences are equals. So you have to be careful. And
by the way, let's be clear, we love white people.
Were not bashing on white people. Always say is come, be, Come,
(28:01):
be the change that you want to see in the world.
Exactly we are the world put off? What um after this? Well,
(28:23):
I mean you're doing it. You're you're you know, you're
talking about your book and you're sharing your story with everyone. Um,
and you've done incredible work. So far with your within
your writing. Um, what is next for you? Well, I
feel like in the nonprofit space because I help Edward
James almost run the Latino Film Institute. We've done a
lot of good stuff with the Youth Cinema Project and
(28:45):
with La Leif, the Los Angeles the Tina Tractional Film Festival,
and I now feel confident that I can leave that
with our new directors and our new leadership, and I
can strictly focus on Hollywood. Worker Gina Rodriguez or Leon
was like, you need to become a showrunner, she said
to me, before you even knew what a showrunner was. Then,
(29:07):
when I got into the Jane the Bridge and Writer's
room and discovered kind of like who really holds a
lot of the cloud and power and TV? That's kind
of my goal now. I wanna I wanna be able
to become a showrunner so that I can help create
those jobs for the people who I know are not
just worthy of them, but name them the most. It's
(29:28):
gonna take a while because you have to come up
the TV hierarchy and you have to take your steps
and pay your dues. But I'm slowly but surely I'm
getting there. I'm selling a TV show here and there,
getting a book deal, adapting this book into a TV show.
You know, it's a it's it's a long it's a
(29:49):
long process. It's a long it's a long journey. But
I'm here for it. I'm here for it, UM, and
I can't wait to continue watching your journey maybe one
day and working together. Yes, okay, UM, and I just
I'm I'm I'm so proud of you. I'm so honored
that you're one of us. UM. And I'm I'm so
(30:15):
excited to continue supporting your journey. UM in this crazy
thing that we call the entertainment industry. UM, you are
incredibly talented. You have so much to offer, and UM
it's it's yeah. I thank you for everything that you're doing.
I really do. I'm really I'm going through a moment
(30:35):
after reading your book. But I do have one question
for you before UM talk about this interview. UM, you
still got the Kirk Gibson. Oh wow, it's wow, So
that you know it's so funny, UM, because you have
to read the book. I'm sorry, Okay, you have to
read the book. It's chapter Field of Dreams. Do you
(30:58):
think so it was Steve Garby. I was in I was, yeah,
I was in love with Kirk Gibson. My cousin gave
me the Steve Garvey signed Dodger baseball and it was
you know what. I wanted to leave that chapter as
this beautiful chapter of just father and son playing catch. Um,
(31:21):
But the honest truth was, that's the only time my
dad and I ever played catch in our lives. As
an immigrant, he never had He worked like seven days
a week, and he never had time to spend with me.
And I knew that, which is why I cherished that
moment so much. So anyway, cut to I don't have
a baseball, so I decided to use this Steve Carvey
autographed baseball and I destroyed it that day. It was destroyed,
(31:43):
and it was heartbreaking because I love the Dodgers so
much when I first moved to this country. Um, but
someone read the book and sent me a sign Steve
Garby autographed baseball. You will not believe it. I nearly
cried when I opened that president it. Okay, isn't it remarkable?
See Garvey ball is in your possession. And I honestly
(32:07):
read that chapter and I was like, I just hope
he has the ball and you're you're right because Kurt,
you ended with Kirk Gibson. And that's where my mind.
I have a lot of things I've bled here, Okay
a lot because because I sent Kirk Gibson and that
home run in World Series when I first came to
this country was like my welcome to the United States.
But that baseball, you know, it was to me. It
(32:28):
was so deeply moving that someone read the book and
was like, I need to give him, I need to
give replaced that autographed baseball. But they did, and it
was so great. And did you finish it all the
way to the end. Yes? And then did let me
tell you something this is These are the two best
gifts I ever got. I was invited to go on
(32:48):
CBS Mornings and Gail King interviewed me and Gil King.
When I walked into the studio, she gifted me Vicks
vapor rub that she it to buy herself. Oh, come on,
why is everybody taking my ideas of my gifts that
I'm trying to give you. At the end of this episode,
(33:09):
thanks Gail, Okay, what's the next one? But it was
so beautiful. Oh, I couldn't believe she did that. You're
gonna have an endless supply, endless supply for the rest
of your life, Okay, which I had all along, but
that it was that one. I'm sure it's you sitting
somewhere right. You haven't sitting somewhere special. I love that.
(33:32):
It's right next, it's right next. I love that. I
love that. Well. You deserve, you deserve, you deserve. Thank you.
This is the moment we've all been waiting for. Yeah,
this is the moment of the questions. Are you ready
for ready? Okay? Number one? What's a play you would
(33:54):
live in for a day, a play that I want
to live in for a day, or it could be
a musical mute Mulan Rouge. I'll say Mulan Rouge because
I just watched it at the Pantageous the other day
and I remember how much I love that story of
those songs. Oh don't jud here. Good. Number two, what's
(34:18):
something that didn't make into the book that you still
hold on to? You can't ask me that, Um, I
just did I know? Okay, So this is what happened. Um.
I had to share the chapters with everyone in my
life to make sure that they were okay with it.
Everyone was except one, and it's my best friend who
(34:40):
came out. He came out as on. He came out
as gay to me, like r right out of high school,
and and his courage to do that kind of like
affected me and gave me the courage to come out
of the shadows. So I wrote the chapter that way.
But he was like, I'm sorry, this is my personal life,
but I don't feel comfortable you're talking about it. And
(35:02):
I fully understand why he said that, and I removed
the chapter. But to this day, I'm like, oh God,
I just wish I would have added that in the book.
It was he had I don't think he understood how
much love I have for him and what that chapter
in my life meant. But yeah, that's the one I
wish I would have kept in the book. I kind
of remember slightly what you're speaking about. There's a little
(35:25):
moment that you do mentioned, but it was, it was,
it was an entire chapter. It was effective. I will
let you know that still was affected the small portion
that you died in there. Number three, What reminds you
of home or makes you feel at home? Oh that
is such a beautiful question. Um god, it it probably
(35:48):
is Okay, I'm not gonna say Biggs Paporook because we
just I'm gonna say, um it, it's gotta be my
mom's from Sevich. Whenever I ate my mom from Sevich,
I'm always like it. Tell supports me, like Rattatu. We
all the way back to like six years old, and
(36:09):
we know the drama with Cevich. You already know I
will go to war. I think our countries went to
war over who has uh created by credit on Cevich,
Peruvians or Ecuadorigans. I'm going to leave that one for
the for the listeners to tappen to tappen, we gotta
leave them with something. But it's been an absolute pleasure.
(36:30):
I've loved every minute with you too. I am a
huge fan. Like I said, I cannot wait to keep
following your journey. If our listeners want to follow you
and follow all the amazing things you're doing. Is there
a social media plug this is the moment? Yeah, of course,
I'm Mr Rafael Gustin everywhere. I just got on TikTok.
(36:50):
If you can believe that I just got on yesterday,
Oh my god, it's so difficult. It's been fun. It's
been fun. But apparently got you got somebody running that
for you? Were you doing yourself? I'm working with someone
a gen z er for sure, but might need their information.
I'm sorry. Okay, continue, but also here's some information for
all your readers that I didn't know. My publisher was
(37:11):
like Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, they don't sell books. TikTok sells books,
and my god, they were right. I was able to
build a little audience on TikTok were like, oh I
love your book. I buy your book. On Instagram people
be like, yeah, yeah, you look cool. Whatever where Instagram
is just for show now, it's all lot. It's so crazy.
(37:31):
This is the world we live in. I know, and
I feel so old. Thank you so much impressed. Everybody,
go out and buy illegally yours. It's incredible. You won't
regret it. It's so good. Or or go watch seasons
four and five of Jane the Virgin. Thank you so much,
(37:54):
my love, thank you. It's been a pleasure. Pleasures on
my whenever. So Mona Nita is a production of Sonato
in partnership with I Heart Radio's Michael Bluda podcast Network.
For more podcasts from I heart Radio, visit the I
heart Radio app Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to
your favorite shows.
Oh yeah, me hint there. I just want to give
you a heads up. The program you are about to
hear may have some explicit language, it may not. It
also depends on where the vibes and the spirit leads us.
Hope you enjoy Welcome to more Anita, a deep dive
into the Latin X experience. With more Anita, we want
(00:22):
to create a community and a shared space with you
while sharing knowledge and inspiration. This show is about celebrating
our culture with guests who exemplify the best of us.
I'm Darrylene Gastillo Bethane Beetle. All right, y'all, this week
you have to use your imagination. Imagine you are brought
(00:46):
to a country thinking that you are just going for
a vacation, just to visit some family and see the sites. Now,
imagine you never ever go back home without any explanation
and from anyone around you, and you yourself finally coming
to the realization that this vacation place, this place you
(01:08):
were supposed to just pass by, is now your new home.
On top of this new home that you must adjust to,
you then come to find out later in your life
that you are actually undocumented. This place that you have
worked years into trying to recreate as your home. You
were never even invited to stay. A seat at the
(01:30):
table was never even prepared for you. Rafael Agostine, TV
writer from the award winning show Jane the Virgin, shares
with us in this incredible interview a memoir that he
has written called Illegally Yours. This book gives us a
front seat into Rafael's experience on how he accidentally discovered
(01:52):
he was undocumented and how this changed everything he thought
he kneeled about himself and his family. It challenges the
question what does it mean to be an American? For me?
After reading it, the question that landed heavy was who
is the American dream really for? Okay, I'll drop the
(02:13):
serious tone because honestly, this book, though it made me
tear up multiple times, it also made me laugh out
loud l O L. You'll get it as you keep listening.
But like, seriously, half Ile's writing is next level. I
don't know how someone can take something so traumatic, something
so scary, something so heartbreaking, and turn it into a comical,
(02:37):
heartwarming masterpiece. I think what truly makes it comical is
it's honesty. Some of it really makes you repeat to yourself. Damn,
this really happened. Illegally Yours is nothing but honest and
half Ile's words hit you in so many ways, and
they come from so many angles you don't even see
(02:58):
it coming. So prepare yourself for this one, the ride
through Illegally Yours being people Rafael. Oh yeah, welcome to
Oh my god, thank you for having me. It's so exciting.
(03:18):
I'm so excited because, um, well, being a fan of
your work and then to see your name pop up
in my email from my manager, I was like, I
wrote a book. I did. It's it's incredible. Um. It's
called Illegally Yours. Um, and it's a memoir and um,
(03:40):
first off, the cover. Okay, can we talk about the cover,
the storytelling because this is this is it's eye catching,
thank you, you know, believe it or not. That's the
first picture my parents and I ever took in this
country together. So when we started discussing the cover, I said,
I'm not sure what we can do, but I want
this picture to be used. Uh. And then when we
(04:03):
use that picture, I said, I wanted to cover my
parents eyes in a way of trying to protect their identity.
And then the idea of doing it with the stars
with the stars from the American flag worked so well
because I don't know, you hiding their identity, but it's
clear they have like the American dreams in their their
pych It's yeah, perfect. I already like I knew what
(04:23):
I already knew what I was getting right when it
landed in Um. And then, I mean, by the way,
I was Emo before Emo was a thing. Look at that. So,
I mean I opened the book, and um, I was
really busy. And I'm the kind of reader where like
I read seven books at a time. I don't know,
(04:46):
you know, I read and then I never finished them.
They just you're terrible. It kind of wrote it, you
know here. I was very impressed by your reading skills. Um,
My mom is a writer, so like, you know, I
would just read and read and read growing up, and
I don't know, I just I guess as I got older,
I'm like, oh, I'm bored with that book with me,
like you know, move on and move on. And I
sat down with your book and I read it in
(05:07):
two days. It's so good, Raphael. I mean I laughed
a lot. I even wrote and trying to like find
like little spots I wrote like l O L in
all the places that I thought were really funny, and
then I stopped writing L L because like after every sentence,
I was like, Okay, okay, it's giving comedy. It's giving comedy.
(05:29):
It's giving um just so many like memories for myself,
within my family and within my friends stories and my
families stories. Um, and then it's giving tears. You like
hit me with the left punch on that one. I
was like crying in bed and my fiance is like,
are you crying. I'm like yeah, like it got me. Um. Well,
(05:55):
first and foremost, let me say that it was very
important to me that I wrote it as a comedy.
I think so many times we have like trauma porn
in our in our TV and our books and the
woe is Me narrative, but that's not our community. Like, yeah,
we go through hardships and yeah, there's some very very
tough circumstances that we have to overcome, but we always
(06:16):
find the joy in the humor in life. And that's
what I wanted to like incorporate in the book, Like,
despite how terrible our existence is, undocumented Americans were in
the United States, we still laugh and had so much fun.
You definitely did. And I'm just before we dive into
what the book is about, I'd love for you to
(06:39):
let me and the listeners know, um, because it was
just something that immediately came to my mind while I
was reading it. I just was, what drew you to
write the book? Was this the COVID project? Was this, uh,
something you've been working on for years and years and years.
You've just been writing a little pieces here and there.
What led you to finally, you know, do the thing? Wow?
I feel like my entire your career um can be
(07:02):
summarized by me insisting on writing myself into existence. Ever
ever since I was like at U c l A
and I was like not getting by the way. I
went to U Cilia on an acting scholarship, quickly realized
they're like no rules for like minorities that alone Latinos
and Latina. So I started That's how we came out
of play, right, That's how I started writing stuff. Um.
So even back then, I used to just have the
(07:24):
mantra I have to write myself into existence. And this
book was actually a TV pilot from many years ago.
It was like realizing that I wanted to tell my
parents story, my journey of coming to the United States,
my journey of discovering that I was undocumented while in
high school, Like super late in the game. Uh, when
(07:45):
I decided to write that as a TV pilot, that
script is what made me a Sun Dance Institute episodic fellow.
That script got me my first Hollywood TV agent. That
script got me in my first TV writer's room. That
script got me my first TV cell with CBS Studios
UM And then you know, you go through the system
(08:05):
and sometimes projects get picked up or they or they
die in development. And when that script didn't move forward
to a TV show, I kind of felt like I
felt like the story was too important not to share.
So I was like, that's okay, if it's not a
TV I'll just write as a book. And there's so
much There was so many anecdotes that I couldn't tell
(08:26):
in the pilot that we were writing that I figured
that maybe the book is the best way of telling
the story. And then you're right. It was because of
COVID is because of the Great Pause. It was the
the world coming to to a halt and me realizing, oh,
I've been like in this rat race for so long.
I've been working NonStop for like four or five years.
(08:49):
What what do I want my legacy to be on
this earth? What do I want to say? And what
do I want to leave behind? That's when I went
back to the TV pilot and I was like, oh,
you know what, I'm going to write it as a book.
And I created a book proposal. I got a book agent,
a badass Latino from New York. Uh, and then we
got a book deal out of it. And Yeah, honestly,
(09:11):
if it wasn't for the pandemic, I don't know if
I would have had the time to sit down and
write the book. Yeah. Yeah, Um, I think that a
lot of us artists definitely so a lot from be
impacted from COVID and what that really did for us
and sitting in silence kind of and and what are
we going to do now kind of feelings? Um? In
(09:34):
your words, I just just because I'm I mean, i
could sit here and talk about the book chapter by chapter.
I'm talking about the book word for word, but L
O L but I'm curious, um in your words, like
what is what is illegally yours about it? You know? UM?
(09:56):
I describe it as a comedic coming of age more
about an all American family that just happens to be undocumented.
That's the thing like I really wanted, I say, general
market audiences, but you know, white people, white people to read,
to read this book and be like, oh my god,
(10:16):
this family sounds just like mine, or at the very least,
I couldn't relate to their hopes, their dreams, aspirations and everything. Um,
you know, my my my framing device was always like
my life felt like the sitcom growing up, So how
does that sit come play out? That was how I
wanted to write and attack the book. And um, there's
(10:39):
one thing that I didn't mention that I really loved
about your book, Um, you teach in the book. There's
a lot of the splintingint I mean, there's a lot
of educating and teaching moments that I think, Um, yeah,
I think a white audience can be if it from.
(11:00):
But also I also think our community can benefit from
as Latina people and and and American you know American
Latina people. I think, Um, something that really fascinated me
about you and can I call you? Yeah, of course, okay,
something that I really connected with you about and something
that I was very surprised about. And I've been speaking
(11:22):
about it with my fiance here he's Colombian, and with
his family. But I related so much to this sense
of awareness that you've always had in your book, in
your in your life. And something that like really stuck
out to me was a sentence that you had mentioned
when you had landed in Madrid Finally. I won't I
(11:44):
won't spoil the juice, but it's it's a juicy story
that you know, you ended up in kind of immigration jail,
and um, you finally were aver. You finally were able
to um go to Madrid and and land there and
walk outside, and you had a very open eyed realization
(12:06):
of the white tourists all around you and the lack
of um color just in that moment. And there's so
many moments of this in the book that I don't
know why. It just really stuck out to me, because,
as I mean, we being round, and I used to
travel a lot when I was younger, and and I
have family in Spain, so I remember that same moment
(12:28):
you're talking about and being like, oh, where is everybody?
Because it's something that I've always questioned for myself, and
I even asked my parents, like, how did you instill
that awareness in me? What is that? And where did
that come from? And I'm curious for you, where do
you think that came from for you? Because it's something that, yeah,
(12:51):
it can it can be, it can be taught, but
it's something to me that I think it's more felt. Wow,
I have to say that probably comes from my mom.
My mom loves everybody and she has such a big
open heart that I like, it was hard for me
to make those barriers for myself with people of different
you know, ethnicities and color in my life. To me,
(13:12):
they were all my brothers and sisters. Um, but you
hit on something in the book that my my book
editor tried to get me away from because it was
so much easier for me to frame this book as
the lessons that I learned, Right, That's what I wanted
to share, and she was like, no, that's boring. You
have to like I had that within the storytelling. So
it's funny that you picked up on that because every
(13:34):
chapter I was like, what did I agree from all this?
You know? Um, but I have a great friend and mentor.
His name is jos Antonio Vargas uh pull A surprise,
winning on he came out his own documented on the
cover of Time magazine, Right the Filipino American UM. He
told me, the problem with people like us, like the
(13:56):
people who are socially conscious, the woke right, is that
we tend to lead with our politics because we enter
rooms where there's no one else like us, so we
kind of like overcompensate. So early early on, he always
told me it's important that people like us lead with
our hearts and not our politics. And that's what this
book was for me. I was like, how can I
(14:18):
lead with imagine talking about immigration and talk about undocumented Americans.
It's already so like politically charged that it was important
to lead with my heart. It was important to lead
with the humor in the comedy so that it's easier
for everyone else who might not be on document or
might not have anybody who's on document in their family,
can come to this story and see us as people. Right.
(14:40):
And this is something I learned from Jenny Snyder Ermine
that the creator of Jane the Virgin. She said, people
can ignore topics, people can ignore politics, people can ignore issues,
but people can ignore other people. M Uh, this book
(15:01):
is is um I felt your heart out reading it.
I really did. I really did not too gloss over it,
but you mentioned that the Spain, the Spain thing that
(15:23):
was the my God. And again not not too many
spoiler alerts here, but I do open up the book
with me being deported from Spain and then when I
when I taken to the Spanish prison at the airport,
it's me and a bunch of black people. They just
happened to be from Venezuela and Colombia and Cuba, but
(15:45):
they were all black. And that was just so shocking
to me that it didn't matter where you went in
the world, like your black skin was gonna be a
detriment to your peaceful existence. And I needed to see
that because I would see that in and films and
TVs in the United States, but to see it at
international waters as well, I was like, what is going on? Yeah?
(16:10):
And if I may add um because the very first
chapter I get to it, I was the my The
biggest shock in my life was discovering I was on
document in high school. But the first big reveal and
shock for me was discovering that I wasn't white. And
that happened to me right away when I got to
this country because I grew up thinking I was just
a regular white kid with the beautiful olive ted you know,
(16:32):
and living in my grandparents big house in Ecuador, South America,
and growing up with like maids and chauffeurs. And then
I come to the United States and I moved into
my aunt's garage and I'm like, okay, so here the
United States, we're the maids and chauffeurs. And then I
go to my first day of public school in this country,
(16:52):
and it was a reality I had not seen in
all the films and TVs that I watched in eperor
from the United States. Every when I saw on the
screen was blonde and blue eyed, and that's what I
thought America was. So when I saw the great diversity
in this country, I was like, what the hell is
what's going on here? The one thing that was really
(17:16):
I mean, I'm a theater I'm a theater girl, and
you know, turned onto TV film and this nut and
understanding that I love it. I loved reading that like
you're you were, you know, a theater was like. And
also hearing that like in l a like hearing that
kind of energy that was surrounding the work you were
doing and the work you were starting. That's refreshing, first off,
(17:38):
because I guess we don't really get that part because
you know, obviously illegally yours part two is not coming
out just yet, right, Um, what was the jump from
there to TV and film? Was that just because you
were in Cali and it just kind of fell into
that or like, what was that for you? That's no? Um,
So I can honestly say that my immigration problems are
(18:00):
would led me to this career and led me into
the arts because I come from a long line of
doctors and lawyers, right, so maybe that was gonna be
my path. But with my immigration problems and I couldn't
get financiality, Um, I couldn't get any type of support.
I had no direction. I ended up at community college
here in California, and because I had no idea how
(18:20):
long my immigration limbo would last, I took every class
that that community college had to offer. Literally went down
in alphabetic border. I was like a for anthropology, be
for biology, see for chemistry. Think about how many classes
I took before I got to tea in theater A million?
And then it was in that class where I first
started to find my self worth and my self esteem
(18:44):
and my self respect, because there's something interesting about secretly
needing that love from your community, feeling mothered, feeling like
you're not wanted in this country, and then all of
a sudden, you're on the stage and people are admiring
you and loving you and clapping for you. And I
was like, oh my god, I need this. I don't
even I didn't even know why I needed it, but
(19:06):
I needed it. And like I say in the book,
I had been acting American my whole life, so the
acting seemed like natural to me, but it was what
I did. So I started doing theater community college, transferred
to u c l A School Theater, Film, and Television,
continue to do theater again, writing myself into existence. I
started writing my own comedy shows and it was one
(19:26):
of those comedy shows that I toured the nation with
that eventually got picked up for TV development. So I
transitioned from theater to TV because I created a play
that everyone wanted to exploit and it was that simple. Again,
Hollywood people try to make it seem like, Oh, it's
the agents that run this town, or it's the producers,
(19:48):
is the business, is the lawyers? That's all bullshit. Hollywood
runs on story period. They might call it I P
everyone calls it intellectual property. That's that's another fancy way
of saying story. So if you wrote a book, if
you wrote a play, if you wrote a comic book,
if you have a podcast, if you have something that
people want to exploit, you have all the power in
(20:09):
this town. So that I realized that with the play
that I wrote, everyone wanted to adapt it into a
TV show. And that was my first experience. Granted I
was too young, too young, and too inexperienced, so it
was a ship show for me because I didn't fight
for my voice, or even worse, I was an immigrant
(20:30):
and I was a people pleaser. So when you're in
the middle of that TV machinery, if you don't fight
for your vision and you don't fight for your voice,
it's just gonna be like a Frankenstein thing with your
name on it that you're not even gonna like, right,
And that was that was my biggest lesson in Hollywood.
Success has many parents, but failure is an orphan. When
(20:56):
that show that we adapted didn't work, it was my fault.
It didn't matter it that I listened to every showrunner, producer, director,
TV executive to make sure they were happy. When it
didn't work, it was my fault. And again I was like, man,
maybe I don't belong in this town. Maybe I should
just stick to doing plays in theater. Gave this is crazy,
(21:17):
So you realize it's like, oh, it's just this is
what it is. This is what it is. Yeah, this
is just what it is. And I'm just until I
realized if I'm going to fail, I want to fail
by my choices and by my merits, which is why
I decided to write that TV pilot because I was like, Okay,
this thing didn't work and I played it by your rules.
So now I'm going to create something on my own
(21:38):
that could also could probably suck, but at least if
it fails, I know I did everything I could. You
did it. Yeah, I think that that's what a lot
of and it's just something that a lot of my
lapina for an act fellow actors, you know, we all
struggle with that same thing or speaking about where it's like, oh,
(21:59):
I guess we got to write our own stories because
at the end of the day, you know, I mean,
I'm just going to keep being overlooked, right or overviewed
if I don't start taking control. I mean obviously in
imposter syndrome and like all that and um, but it's like, oh,
is what I have to say enough? Like, it's what
I have to offer as an artist, as a human
(22:20):
being enough. I think a lot of especially Latino artists
you know, struggle with that. Um. Well, let this podcast
be a testament to what what you have to say
and what you bring to the table is enough. Yeah. Absolutely,
it's a it's a reminder and all that. And I've
spoken to a lot of like, especially like aspiring artists
(22:41):
and theater students throughout my years, and I always tell
them the best thing you could do is learn how
to write, because you will never go without work if
you know how to write, because you can always right
yourself into existence, into existence. Um. And even that, there's
a moment in the book where you you discussed like
the struggle of Okay, well, and I'd hit me hard
because I'm like, yeah, totally, Um, the placement of Latino
(23:05):
people in this country and what does that actually mean
in creating space for ourselves where you know, you came,
you came to this country and you're like, oh, the
black people have that. White people got this, but what
about us where we go? Um? And I think that's
always just I think, no matter if you're after Latino,
if you're white, let me know if there's always that
feeling of like where do I fit? And race in
(23:30):
America is so tough, it's so tough to talk about.
It's so tough to understand if you don't fit perfectly
in that black and white dichotomy. Um, after all of
these years, to me, race is and has always been
a social construct, right. The problem is that even though
race is not real, racism is very real. So you
(23:52):
need the concept of race just to understand the impact
of racism. It's so it's such a mindful to me, absolutely,
And then it's also then then you know the community,
the Latina community then wants to deny it. It's just
they don't want to be a part of it. Or
people sometimes racist. I'm like Jesus Christ, what's wrong with you?
(24:13):
Which leads me into another sector of this interview with you,
where you are today and what you're seeing in the
industry now, and if you're seeing some kind of difference
in some kind of change, in any kind of way
in the work that you've been doing and the access
that you have, has there been changed. Do you think
(24:35):
it's enough? What do you think on your ends we
need to do? And I say this too as like
you know, as an Afro Latina actress. Yeah, I've I've
seen a couple of things. Yeah, I've been in for
like finally I'm getting in for the series regulars and
I'm doing that. I'm having this conversation and I'm bringing
that into the audition, But at the end of the day,
they're still booking the white girl, you know, So it's
like what or not even the white the white latina,
(24:57):
right or or that or this. So like I'm curious
for you as being someone who's in the room where
it happens, I'm curious for you, like what has that
been like, especially reading this book and your experiences, because
there's someone who's very aware things are painfully slowly getting better.
(25:20):
It's not by any means where it needs to be.
And a lot of the times casting is the first
place where we can start seeing some positive change. But
we're talking about structural power in Hollywood that we have
to change. We need more executives and positions of power,
more producers and positions of power. Um, we need more
(25:40):
like directors and writers, you know, and we don't have
enough of that. So that's what I'm hoping we continue
to develop. I remind people that we had better representation
in the nineteen fifties and everyone in the mayor Erica
was accustomed to having a Latino in their living room
(26:03):
every day and the biggest hit show in the country,
and that's I Love Lucy, that's Naisi Ernest and I
Love Lucy. And we're just trying to get back to that, right.
Um yeah, I mean we've had slow progress and it
needs to get better, but it's not by any means
(26:27):
where it needs to be, right, especially in Hollywood, especially
in Los Angeles. As close to like fifty percent Latinos
in this county where Hollywood resides, and yet we're like
five percent of the speaking roles or maybe fifteen percent
of the workforce here. And that's that's like below the line.
(26:53):
When it comes to above the line and it comes
to executives, god, we're probably like three percent or at mo.
That's those are disgusting numbers. That's that's structural racism that
no one really wants to talk about absolutely, but you know,
we we the best we could do is tell our stories,
(27:14):
be the difference we want to see in the world.
Keep showing up and keep showing up. You know you
said something at the at the beginning of this question
that really hit me. I got into a big fight
with the bunch of my friends not too long ago
because I said, listen, you can be Latin X and
not be a person of color, and they were like,
what are you saying? I I acknowledge my privilege, and
(27:40):
I also acknowledge that there's some of us in our
community that are saying, oh my god, what is me?
I'm a person of color and you're blond and blue eyed,
and I'm like, what on your experience? Not not all
experiences are equals. So you have to be careful. And
by the way, let's be clear, we love white people.
Were not bashing on white people. Always say is come, be, Come,
(28:01):
be the change that you want to see in the world.
Exactly we are the world put off? What um after this? Well,
(28:23):
I mean you're doing it. You're you're you know, you're
talking about your book and you're sharing your story with everyone. Um,
and you've done incredible work. So far with your within
your writing. Um, what is next for you? Well, I
feel like in the nonprofit space because I help Edward
James almost run the Latino Film Institute. We've done a
lot of good stuff with the Youth Cinema Project and
(28:45):
with La Leif, the Los Angeles the Tina Tractional Film Festival,
and I now feel confident that I can leave that
with our new directors and our new leadership, and I
can strictly focus on Hollywood. Worker Gina Rodriguez or Leon
was like, you need to become a showrunner, she said
to me, before you even knew what a showrunner was. Then,
(29:07):
when I got into the Jane the Bridge and Writer's
room and discovered kind of like who really holds a
lot of the cloud and power and TV? That's kind
of my goal now. I wanna I wanna be able
to become a showrunner so that I can help create
those jobs for the people who I know are not
just worthy of them, but name them the most. It's
(29:28):
gonna take a while because you have to come up
the TV hierarchy and you have to take your steps
and pay your dues. But I'm slowly but surely I'm
getting there. I'm selling a TV show here and there,
getting a book deal, adapting this book into a TV show.
You know, it's a it's it's a long it's a
(29:49):
long process. It's a long it's a long journey. But
I'm here for it. I'm here for it, UM, and
I can't wait to continue watching your journey maybe one
day and working together. Yes, okay, UM, and I just
I'm I'm I'm so proud of you. I'm so honored
that you're one of us. UM. And I'm I'm so
(30:15):
excited to continue supporting your journey. UM in this crazy
thing that we call the entertainment industry. UM, you are
incredibly talented. You have so much to offer, and UM
it's it's yeah. I thank you for everything that you're doing.
I really do. I'm really I'm going through a moment
(30:35):
after reading your book. But I do have one question
for you before UM talk about this interview. UM, you
still got the Kirk Gibson. Oh wow, it's wow, So
that you know it's so funny, UM, because you have
to read the book. I'm sorry, Okay, you have to
read the book. It's chapter Field of Dreams. Do you
(30:58):
think so it was Steve Garby. I was in I was, yeah,
I was in love with Kirk Gibson. My cousin gave
me the Steve Garvey signed Dodger baseball and it was
you know what. I wanted to leave that chapter as
this beautiful chapter of just father and son playing catch. Um,
(31:21):
But the honest truth was, that's the only time my
dad and I ever played catch in our lives. As
an immigrant, he never had He worked like seven days
a week, and he never had time to spend with me.
And I knew that, which is why I cherished that
moment so much. So anyway, cut to I don't have
a baseball, so I decided to use this Steve Carvey
autographed baseball and I destroyed it that day. It was destroyed,
(31:43):
and it was heartbreaking because I love the Dodgers so
much when I first moved to this country. Um, but
someone read the book and sent me a sign Steve
Garby autographed baseball. You will not believe it. I nearly
cried when I opened that president it. Okay, isn't it remarkable?
See Garvey ball is in your possession. And I honestly
(32:07):
read that chapter and I was like, I just hope
he has the ball and you're you're right because Kurt,
you ended with Kirk Gibson. And that's where my mind.
I have a lot of things I've bled here, Okay
a lot because because I sent Kirk Gibson and that
home run in World Series when I first came to
this country was like my welcome to the United States.
But that baseball, you know, it was to me. It
(32:28):
was so deeply moving that someone read the book and
was like, I need to give him, I need to
give replaced that autographed baseball. But they did, and it
was so great. And did you finish it all the
way to the end. Yes? And then did let me
tell you something this is These are the two best
gifts I ever got. I was invited to go on
(32:48):
CBS Mornings and Gail King interviewed me and Gil King.
When I walked into the studio, she gifted me Vicks
vapor rub that she it to buy herself. Oh, come on,
why is everybody taking my ideas of my gifts that
I'm trying to give you. At the end of this episode,
(33:09):
thanks Gail, Okay, what's the next one? But it was
so beautiful. Oh, I couldn't believe she did that. You're
gonna have an endless supply, endless supply for the rest
of your life, Okay, which I had all along, but
that it was that one. I'm sure it's you sitting
somewhere right. You haven't sitting somewhere special. I love that.
(33:32):
It's right next, it's right next. I love that. I
love that. Well. You deserve, you deserve, you deserve. Thank you.
This is the moment we've all been waiting for. Yeah,
this is the moment of the questions. Are you ready
for ready? Okay? Number one? What's a play you would
(33:54):
live in for a day, a play that I want
to live in for a day, or it could be
a musical mute Mulan Rouge. I'll say Mulan Rouge because
I just watched it at the Pantageous the other day
and I remember how much I love that story of
those songs. Oh don't jud here. Good. Number two, what's
(34:18):
something that didn't make into the book that you still
hold on to? You can't ask me that, Um, I
just did I know? Okay, So this is what happened. Um.
I had to share the chapters with everyone in my
life to make sure that they were okay with it.
Everyone was except one, and it's my best friend who
(34:40):
came out. He came out as on. He came out
as gay to me, like r right out of high school,
and and his courage to do that kind of like
affected me and gave me the courage to come out
of the shadows. So I wrote the chapter that way.
But he was like, I'm sorry, this is my personal life,
but I don't feel comfortable you're talking about it. And
(35:02):
I fully understand why he said that, and I removed
the chapter. But to this day, I'm like, oh God,
I just wish I would have added that in the book.
It was he had I don't think he understood how
much love I have for him and what that chapter
in my life meant. But yeah, that's the one I
wish I would have kept in the book. I kind
of remember slightly what you're speaking about. There's a little
(35:25):
moment that you do mentioned, but it was, it was,
it was an entire chapter. It was effective. I will
let you know that still was affected the small portion
that you died in there. Number three, What reminds you
of home or makes you feel at home? Oh that
is such a beautiful question. Um god, it it probably
(35:48):
is Okay, I'm not gonna say Biggs Paporook because we
just I'm gonna say, um it, it's gotta be my
mom's from Sevich. Whenever I ate my mom from Sevich,
I'm always like it. Tell supports me, like Rattatu. We
all the way back to like six years old, and
(36:09):
we know the drama with Cevich. You already know I
will go to war. I think our countries went to
war over who has uh created by credit on Cevich,
Peruvians or Ecuadorigans. I'm going to leave that one for
the for the listeners to tappen to tappen, we gotta
leave them with something. But it's been an absolute pleasure.
(36:30):
I've loved every minute with you too. I am a
huge fan. Like I said, I cannot wait to keep
following your journey. If our listeners want to follow you
and follow all the amazing things you're doing. Is there
a social media plug this is the moment? Yeah, of course,
I'm Mr Rafael Gustin everywhere. I just got on TikTok.
(36:50):
If you can believe that I just got on yesterday,
Oh my god, it's so difficult. It's been fun. It's
been fun. But apparently got you got somebody running that
for you? Were you doing yourself? I'm working with someone
a gen z er for sure, but might need their information.
I'm sorry. Okay, continue, but also here's some information for
all your readers that I didn't know. My publisher was
(37:11):
like Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, they don't sell books. TikTok sells books,
and my god, they were right. I was able to
build a little audience on TikTok were like, oh I
love your book. I buy your book. On Instagram people
be like, yeah, yeah, you look cool. Whatever where Instagram
is just for show now, it's all lot. It's so crazy.
(37:31):
This is the world we live in. I know, and
I feel so old. Thank you so much impressed. Everybody,
go out and buy illegally yours. It's incredible. You won't
regret it. It's so good. Or or go watch seasons
four and five of Jane the Virgin. Thank you so much,
(37:54):
my love, thank you. It's been a pleasure. Pleasures on
my whenever. So Mona Nita is a production of Sonato
in partnership with I Heart Radio's Michael Bluda podcast Network.
For more podcasts from I heart Radio, visit the I
heart Radio app Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to
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