April 10, 2024 • 38 mins
Chiquis hosts a roundtable discussion on the future of reproductive rights, especially in the Latinx community, following the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade. Joining the conversation are Emily Estefan and Gemeny Hernandez, hosts of the podcast “In Our Own World” and Patty Rodriguez, co-host of the podcast “Out of the Shadows: Children of 86.” It’s a must-listen on a topic that impacts all of us.
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
I highly believe that I am no one to tell
another woman, another being what they can and cannot do
with their body, like who am I?
Speaker 2 (00:14):
The bottom line is equality and that's something that we
haven't gotten to yet, and that's why this issue is
so feels so large right now.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Women are always fighting for all rights and it's time
for men to step up.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Hello everyone, and welcome to a very special episode of
Cheeky's and Chill Today. I'm joined by a few guests
to talk about a very important topic, reproductive rights. Back
in June, the Supreme Court struck down Roe versus Weight.
It's a previous landmark decision that granted women access to
legal abortions for almost fifty years.
Speaker 4 (00:58):
So let's get into it. This is Cheeky's and Chill.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
With Me today is Patti Rodriguez, co host of the
Michael Dura podcast Out of the Shadows.
Speaker 4 (01:13):
Hi, Patti, how are you?
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Hi? Cheeky's thank you so much for having me here
and inviting me to talk about something that's really important
for our community, not just for all women, but for
our community.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
I agree, Thank you so much. I'm so Greatefu, I'm
so excited to hear what you have to say. We
also have Emily Stefan and her partner Jem. Can I
call you Jem, Yes? Yes, Ernandez, their host of in
our own world.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
Welcome, ladies, how are you?
Speaker 2 (01:42):
We are great, We're so honored to be here. We
are part of the Michael Duda iHeart family. We are women,
we are queer women, and that's an interesting perspective for
us to analyze this argument. So thank you for inviting us.
Speaker 5 (01:54):
Thank you so much. Cheeky's. We're so excited to be here.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
And last, but not least, we have our Lean Sat,
a development producer on the Microtura Network and Today's moderator.
She's also very knowledgeable on this topic. So, hi, Arlen,
how are you high?
Speaker 6 (02:10):
Cheeky's High, Ladies, how's everybody doing?
Speaker 4 (02:13):
We're good, awesome, I'm ready.
Speaker 6 (02:15):
This is such an important topic and I'm so grateful
that you were able to lend your platform for us
to have this conversation. We know that reproductive justice, the
reproductive rights is an issue that disproportionately affects people from
the Black, Indigenous and from our community. We know that
this isn't just a woman's issue, that this is an
issue that affects trans people as well as non binary people,
(02:37):
and we've all had some time to process the Supreme
Court's decision to overturn Roe v.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
Wade.
Speaker 6 (02:43):
So, without getting too much into the nitty gritty, I'd
love for this conversation to be us highlighting voices from
our community. So let's kick things off with you, Cheeky's.
Where were you when you heard the Supreme Court overturned
Roe v. Wade. What were your initial thoughts and what
were your initial feelings?
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Oh my god goodness. I was in Dominican Republic. Actually,
I was out there for my birthday, celebrating with some girlfriends,
and I heard the news and I was just like,
honestly flabbergasted.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
I was upset.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
I was like, what is happening in the world? We
were leaving in twenty twenty two? Like I automatically, I
posted something, reposted something, and of course I got some
backlash people in my DMS, you know, saying and giving
me their opinions, and I was going to do this
whole TikTok. I actually still have it saved, and I
never posted it. It's crazy because I tried recording it
like three four times because it would cut me off
(03:36):
and it's just there and I never posted it. So
I said, you know what, I'm going to take it
to my podcast because I think it is something that
not just because I'm an artist and I'm a singer
and I should just stay away from politics. I think
it's it is my god given right to speak about
my thoughts and how I feel and help other people,
you know, And that's what I'm doing, you know. But
(03:57):
it was it was definitely disappointing for me.
Speaker 5 (04:01):
Patty.
Speaker 6 (04:02):
What about you? Where were you? What do you remember
from that day and what were you feeling?
Speaker 3 (04:06):
You know? Interesting enough, I was actually landing into Washington,
d C. I was there for a convention and that
evening after we wrapped up, took an over to the
Supreme Court and there was just so many feelings and
emotions there, so much anger. I think. I think as
(04:30):
as a country, we're just so discouraged by our government
and the the the fact that this is this is
their framing what's happening as this religious reason, when I
think the reality is not, that's not true. It's not
(04:50):
it's it's I feel that it's about control and it
and that's what's heartbreaking and what I feel we're not
really understanding.
Speaker 6 (05:00):
Agreed, We're definitely going to talk about how our culture
and religion intersegt. But before we do that, Emily Gemini,
I'd love to hear your thoughts. Where were you when
you hurt the news and what were your initial feelings.
Speaker 7 (05:13):
I think we were together, weren't we when we found
this out?
Speaker 2 (05:18):
To be honest, I don't remember the exact time and place,
but what I do remember is the moment that I
realized that they're trying to make us feel that history
is further away than it is. We're still living in
a lifetime when women couldn't vote, when slavery was legal.
You know, we have to take a step back and
say yes, you know, at least in certain directions, we're
(05:40):
going in the right direction. However, we're still in a
world where we are discriminating against so many people that
live among us, and some of those people is gender sexuality,
like you mentioned. But the bottom line is equality and
that's something that we haven't gotten to yet. And that's
why this issue is so feels so large right now,
(06:02):
because we feel like we're in a bigger room than
we are. They used to put things in history books
in black and white that were in color to make
us feel like they were further away than they were.
We need to be on the front line still being
these voices and these platforms that you are offering us,
because that's how we're going to change is continuing the conversation. Before,
(06:23):
back in the day, you could even say the word
gay women and voting.
Speaker 5 (06:27):
Ha ha. That's a joke.
Speaker 7 (06:29):
You know.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Now we're able to talk about it. But we're still fighting.
So that's why we're here. That's why we're having the conversation.
I don't remember when, but I every day remember how
important it is, and that's what sticks with me. But yeah,
you remember, I guess yeah.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
I mean I think there was one thing that I
read somewhere that it just stuck with me the whole day,
which was the daughters that are being born today are
being born with less rights than the country that I
was born into because I was lucky enough to be
born in America. And like Emily said, this is a
way bigger thing. And like you said, Patty, this is
much bigger than just the rights that uterus bearing individuals
(07:05):
to speak of, everyone that this affects are trying to protect.
This is about bodily autonomy. This is about anyone not
allowing or not allowing the government to have a say
on what we do with our bodies. That's our god
given right, and I think that more than anything. It
was disheartening to hear that news, but more fuel to
(07:27):
keep pushing forward for a better future.
Speaker 4 (07:30):
For sure.
Speaker 6 (07:31):
Patty, you touched on this a little bit about this
idea that our community. You know, we come from a
culture where religion is sort of deeply rooted in who
we are. Of course, not everyone comes from a religious background,
not everyone was raised in that in that way, but
it is part of who we are as a community.
(07:51):
So Cheeky's I'd love for you to kick this question
off as well. You're someone who has said you believe
in God, but you're more of a spiritual person. Now,
how do those two things intersect? For you? Can someone
be religious and also be pro choice?
Speaker 1 (08:08):
You know what, I think anyone can be whatever they want,
you know what I mean? I guess in speaking for myself,
you know, growing up in a religious home, you know,
we were Christian, A lot of fear was instilled, a
lot of you know, if you don't do this, this
is gonna happen, you're gonna go straight to hell. And
(08:30):
for a long time I believed it, you know, And
thankfully I had an epiphany one day. And I am
definitely more spiritual than religious, and and I'm just the
type of person that respects everyone's decisions.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
I'm very much live and let live.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
And I think that, yeah, I mean, maybe you can
be religious and be a pro choice, but I highly doubted.
I haven't seen someone. And that's what upsets me the
most about this whole thing is that they keep throwing
the Bible at me or at us, and just throwing
in what the Bible says and religion, and it's so
much it's not it's not about that. It's so much
more than that, you know. But for sure, people in
(09:10):
my family that I know, obviously, they they think that
I cannot say that I love God and be okay
with this is what they've they have told me.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
I'm sorry, but I just have to say one incredible thing.
God and religion are two different things in my opinion,
because you can believe in God, you can believe in
the Almighty power, whatever connection you have with your God, right,
but religion as a construct is man made. Those books
were written by humans, passed down by people who were faulted,
(09:45):
who had issues themselves. So I believe in God, but religion,
I'm not sure. And that doesn't mean that I'm not
somebody who has faith, you know, so right, that's where
I feel for me that that line.
Speaker 6 (09:57):
Since you know, Patty, what about you? I know that
you have some strong feelings about this, and it's a complicated.
It can be a complicated conversation to have, especially when
we're talking to people in our family who are very religious,
(10:18):
like Cheeky said, and even sometimes talking to the older generation.
How do those two things play out for you? Being
religious and being pro choice?
Speaker 3 (10:26):
It is very complicated because I believe in God, I
believe in a higher power, I believe in life. But
I also I have a very hard time understanding the
the the motives behind all of this. If you if
you're these individuals who are making these decisions for us,
if they really believe and these babies, and you know
(10:50):
they they they would they would invest in resources to
ensure that every child survives and thrives. That to me
is what just it makes it angers me because if
it was really about the children, we would be investing
and creating a foundation for investing in ensuring that our
(11:15):
children are healthy, that they're not living in poverty, that
their parents and family have a foundation to be able
to raise their children in the way that we should
all be raised. And that's not happening in this country.
It's not happening. So if you can't just the minute
that a child's born, this government completely forgets about our children.
(11:35):
We have the lowest education rates in the entire world.
Our children are not provided with the resources that they
need to thrive in this country and in the world,
and that is what's heartbreaking. So while I believe in life,
and I believe that in God, in the Higher Power,
what I don't believe is the reasoning behind the control
(11:56):
that is being imposed on us. Don't come to me
with this, with this crap, because it really is.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
It is it is.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
It is frustrating because they are they're using this as
a control mechanism. And I, like CHICKI said, you decide,
you have the right to choose what to do. We
have the right to choose what to do with our bodies.
(12:24):
And there's no other body that is being control the
way reproductive people's bodies are controlled and if we don't
see that reality, then this is only the beginning to
just be just a bigger heartbreak and problems in this country.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
I also love what you mentioned that go ahead, Jermany.
Speaker 7 (12:52):
Yeah, sorry, it just to me. We got me thinking, Patty,
it's really funny. How also, we are trying to solve
the problem of unwanted prenancies by looking at women. But
last time I checked, women can't impregnate themselves. It is
a man who impregnates a woman. So why haven't we
focused the conversation to them?
Speaker 5 (13:10):
And that's when you know.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I'm a mother, I'm a mother to two boys, and
I want, I am hoping that I raised my children,
my two boys, knowing that this is not just a
woman's problem. And I hope other parents listening feel the
same way too. And you know, we also see that
(13:32):
when it comes down to this, it's always us who
are the loudest. Women are always fighting for all rights,
and it's time for men to step up because this
is not just our problem. And as parents and mothers,
we have a responsibility to raise boys to know that
(13:54):
they're sharing the world with women and they're just as
much responsible for it than we are, and it's it's
enough that we're the only ones always fighting, and it's
it's heartbreaking and frustrating.
Speaker 6 (14:09):
Cheekuz I hear you. I want to have some strong
thoughts on that one speak on that.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
Yes, no, absolutely, I mean yes, it's not just like
like Jim said, you know, it's we don't impregnate ourselves,
you know, so we shouldn't just be the only ones
held quote nuote accountable, you know. And I highly believe
that I am no one to tell another woman, another
being what they can and cannot do with their body.
Speaker 4 (14:35):
Like who who am I?
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Like?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
That's am I gonna take care of the child? Am
I gonna say no, don't have an abortion, I'll take
care of it. Like That's where I'm like, Okay, all
these people that are voting and that are saying, okay, yes,
you know these women should not have abortions. Okay, Well
are you gonna take care of them? Are you gonna
provide for these children? You know? Because then we have
an even bigger problem. Like if you have if you're
(14:56):
forced to have an unwanted child, there's gonna be a
resentment there from the parent to the child. The child
is gonna grow up upset, and it's gonna cause so
many It's.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
The worst you can do. It's the worst you can
do to a human being. Bring him to a world
where there's no love or they feel no support, wanted,
no support not just by the person birthing them, but
by the entire country and the government. There's absolutely zero
support for these children.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Not only that, speaking as a queer woman, you know,
I have been with men in my life. I've experienced
what it is to feel the responsibility of being a
woman in a sexual relationship, because that's another thing. When
you're with a male, I feel like oftentimes you feel like, oh,
it's my problem, Like if this happens to me, it's
on me.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
You know, I have to.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
Tell the guy and figure it out, and it's my burden. Absolutely,
not like jem and we're just speaking about. However, at
the same time, you know, we have to acknowledge that
as queer women, when we decide to have a child,
that we have to plan that, we have to figure
out what we're going to do, how best to love
that child, how best to find somebody that needs love,
(16:08):
and we have the resources that we can give them.
And so for example, there are so many children that
perhaps somebody doesn't have the resources or love or you know,
mental stability, which is so fair because mental health is
a really big thing, and if you're not in a
mentally well place, you should not be preparing people for
this world, or even after or.
Speaker 7 (16:26):
Even after pregnancy postpadum depression of course.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
Which is again very real and an entire entire thing
that needs to be respected and talked about more because
there's a lot of shame about it. But anyway, so
when we make the decision to go down that path
to find our child, you know, then we are going
to love that child as if it is our own
and give it the life that it deserves, which is
why there are opportunities out there for people to be loved,
(16:51):
just like in nature, just like we see in nature.
Speaker 3 (16:54):
You know, m hm.
Speaker 6 (16:56):
Y'all talked about this a lot about this idea, how
if this was really about pro life and about the children,
then we would really be providing for those children after
they are born. And there's this element of economic control.
Latinas people of color are already paid at such a
lower rate than your white male person is in this country.
(17:21):
Can we talk about that a little bit about the
economic control and how this could potentially prevent women from
going to college, from moving out of their parents' house,
from becoming independent. I'd love to hear y'all's thoughts on that, Patty,
Can we start with you.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Yeah, as a mother to two children, motherhood is the hardest,
especially as a parent trying to navigate a career. My
mom came to this country from Mexico and she had
three children, and I honestly don't know how she did it.
(18:01):
I would say, at the expense of her mental health.
And it shouldn't be that way from others. It needs
a village, and we no longer have that village. Our
ancestors had villages. It was a community that raised children.
You never it's you don't raise children alone. That's not
(18:22):
you don't do that. But somehow in this culture, in
this country's culture, you're supposed to raise your children alone
at the expense of your mental health and your physical
health as well. And what happens is it sets women
back because again there's no support for childcare. You're not
(18:42):
able to It's a lot challenging for you to move
on into your career or as a mother because you're
no longer living for yourself. You're you're living for a
child that needs special care, and not just for a
few hours. Today we're talking about twenty four hours a day,
seven days a week, and in this country, we have
(19:06):
zero support. And me, as an entrepreneur, a writer, a producer,
a creator, I owe that to my village. I was
able and I had the privilege to be able to
bring my aunt from Mexico to help me care for
my children for the first years of their life. Without her,
(19:28):
I wouldn't be sitting here with you all. I wouldn't
have the career that I have, the businesses that I
have because it takes a village. And it's really unfortunate
that women have to choose to and that's what this
country is having us to do, to choose, and we
(19:48):
shouldn't have to choose. We need to bring back our villages.
Women of privilege have their villages that don't talk about it.
Speaker 4 (20:01):
But they pay for their villages.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Yes, they have their drivers that take their kids to school,
They have housekeepers that care for their homes. They have
a nanny for each child, they have tutoring classes, they
have after school programs that they can pay for it
takes a village to raise children, and our community doesn't
have that. So when you when the government implements this
(20:25):
control on us, it's only going to affect us, and
no one's doing anything about it, and we should be
really angry.
Speaker 6 (20:34):
Yes, Cheeks, what about you? You care for your siblings.
I know that you're not a mother yet, but you
are sort of the matriarch of your family right now.
Can you talk a little bit about those kind of
responsibilities and the dynamics of what it means to now
have this access taken from you?
Speaker 1 (20:53):
Well, I mean growing up with a mother of a
five children, a single mother of five children. I hear
what Patti's saying, and I saw firsthand how difficult it was,
and because I was the eldest, what I had to
do had me at fifteen. For her, it was especially
living at my grandparents' home. Like abortion was absolutely not
(21:16):
a choice and it was expensive, so she didn't know
what to do. And I grew up seeing that, you know,
she says, I thought about it.
Speaker 5 (21:23):
I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I didn't want to have you, but I had no choice,
And you know, it was difficult growing up and knowing that, obviously,
But I'm glad. I'm glad she had me, you know,
but I think she had my support. But it was
also very difficult on me because I had to give
up so many things in my childhood to help my mom.
I don't regret it, but that's just my reality. And
(21:44):
now that she's not here, I mean, she taught me
so much. I learned so much, and and it's difficult,
you know, it's difficult, and and it's I've had to
help raise my siblings and I'm telling you, you know, tutoring.
Tutoring is expensive, and I wish that they would help
us more with child care, you know what I mean.
Johnny was eleven years old when my mom passed.
Speaker 4 (22:05):
I didn't know what to do.
Speaker 1 (22:06):
I was trying to figure out my life and I'm like,
how do I You know, it was just a lot,
I mean, especially even growing up. I mean, we weren't
born with a silver spoon in our mouth, you know,
and it was it was hard. It was definitely hard.
So that's one thing that it's just it upsets me
and I just even if it is someone that had
(22:27):
consensual sex and she just doesn't want to have the
baby with this guy or whoever it may be Why
why force someone you know what I mean? Or what
if it's I just heard something like I don't know,
like two months ago, someone I believe a little girl
in Ohio I think she was ten years old who
was raped and she had to travel I don't know
where because she couldn't have an abortion.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
Where she was from.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
So I'm just like, what freaking world are we living in?
Like this is ridiculous to me. And just because I'm
pro choice doesn't mean i'm pro abortion. I'm not one
to say use abortion as birth can. I'm just saying,
don't tell me what I can do with my body,
you know what I mean, Like don't don't that's not
it's not okay with me. It makes me feel very uncomfortable,
(23:09):
and it makes it worries me for my future children,
you know, or like that, you know what I mean,
Like what what's going on? We have to stand up
and we have to have these hard conversations, and they're
going to be uncomfortable to some people, but I think
it's very important for for you know, future generations to come.
Speaker 6 (23:32):
Emily and Jim, what about you and your perspective from
the queer community. I would love to get your thoughts
on it, and you're also gen zers.
Speaker 5 (23:41):
Actually we're millennials. We are not. Okay, yes, there.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
Gen zers, but you know millennials are better just saying
little I.
Speaker 7 (23:54):
Know, you know, cheeky's I was thinking when when I
was listening to you speak, it's it's you're absolutely right.
Also makes me wonder what Coven's next. If they were
able to take this from us, what else can they take?
And that's the thing is that Roe v. Wade was
sort of an umbrella law where it did discuss other
parts of pregnancy. How should I say this? Pregnancy things
(24:17):
like concepts, pregnancy issues, thank you, health pregnancy issues like contraceptives,
the right to have a cesarean different things that are
then put into question. I mean, let's not pretend like
we didn't all probably hear Justice Clarence Thomas mentioned gay
marriage is something that.
Speaker 5 (24:32):
We should look at.
Speaker 7 (24:34):
So it's it's it's extremely wearisome and I couldn't agree
with you more. It's not even about the valid truth
of the ten year old who had to go to
an obscene amount of length to have an abortion, or
the women who are at risk of dying themselves, or
the parents who are loving parents who are excited and
have prepared for a child who unfortunately was not able
(24:56):
to develop their vital organs. All of these other situations
that are extremely valid where the life of the child
is put over the life of the mother. But just
the regular Susan or Tom, or the person who just
simply ended up pregnant, be it because of something severe
or something that occurred to them as terrible as a
(25:17):
sexual harassment or even rape, or simply I, like you said,
I met this person and this happened, and I'm not
ready for this in my life, and why would I
bring a child into a life that I'm not prepared
to raise them in?
Speaker 2 (25:27):
So yeah, I uh, cheeky's you said something that I
want to be fair and I'm going to be honest
because you said, oh, well, you know, I wasn't born
with the silver spoon in my mouth. I was when
I was born, I wanted for nothing. I had my village,
right Because here's the funny thing. My parents not only
do they have that village, that is the Latino culture,
(25:50):
which is auelas and auelas. And I can call my
mom right now and she'll be here in ten minutes.
If I need her. And also I had the ability of, oh,
if I needed to call a driver, which I never did,
but I'm saying I had the ability to, you know,
like I didn't want for anything. And that perspective to
me says okay, Like you said, most of the uterusparing
human beings who are having this experience, right, they are
(26:13):
not the ones making the decisions. The ones making the
decisions are the ones with the silver spoon, the one
that can travel to whatever city they want to acquire
that doctor and acquire that medical procedure. The women who
are dying or are not the people who are making
the decisions. We're going to have a loss of women
that is catastrophic as a result of You cannot stop
(26:33):
people doing what they need and want to do.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
What you're going to do.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Is stop them from getting adequate care to do so
it is not going to stop. It is going to
keep going. And then as well, as a result of that,
as a gay woman, you mentioned, well, how do you
feel as a gay woman? Jem said something to me
the other day that I was like, I never even
thought of that, because as a woman, I feel so
passionately about my body and it's a shame that I
(26:58):
do because we are looked at in such an objective way. However,
as a gay woman, what happens when I have a
straight daughter? What happens when I have a daughter who
is out there in the world that is my tribe
that I need to take care of, who now, like
Jem says, grew up in a world with less rights
than me.
Speaker 5 (27:19):
That is ridiculous For what.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
For me to say in three months time that now
her and I can't get married if we want to,
that we're afraid that if I'm dying in the hospital room,
she can't come in to say goodbye like these are.
That's why you say, be loud, be proud, and our
culture supports those things because we are a tribe and
we've always operated that way, and there's no shame in that.
Speaker 5 (27:42):
It's about balance.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
That's all aout you mad, You've mentioned something very very
important that needs to be repeated. Abortions are not going
to end ever they've been They've have been happening since
the beginning of time. So let's be everyone listening to
me very clear about that. What's going to stop from
(28:06):
what's going to stop from happening is access to adequate
health for these women save abortions, and that's what we
need to be protecting adequate health for these women. So
whether you're if you're pro life, you're pro adequate health.
That's what you should be fighting for.
Speaker 5 (28:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (28:29):
Well, speaking on that, Patty, I'd love to get your thoughts.
I know that you're a mom, You're raising two boys.
How is this going to impact their lives? Other children's
lives who are growing up in this type of society
where we're limiting uh, reproductive justice, reproductive rights. I would
(28:51):
love to if you can share what kind of conversations
you've had with them, if you've had any conversations with
them so far.
Speaker 3 (28:58):
My children are still very young there, there are still babies,
so I'm not there. I but what I want to
as as our mother is raise them to believe and
to understand that this is not just a woman's problem.
This is also their problem and they have to join
(29:21):
the fight as well when they're ready. And that's what
I hope that when they are ready to do that,
they also are as loud as we are.
Speaker 7 (29:31):
M hmm.
Speaker 6 (29:33):
Yeah. And what about you, cheeky is I know you've
shared your wishes that you hope to have children of
your own one day. Yeah, how are you? How are
you seeing this, the overturning of Roe v.
Speaker 4 (29:46):
Wade.
Speaker 6 (29:46):
How is that going to impact you and your decisions?
Speaker 5 (29:49):
Uh?
Speaker 6 (29:50):
Some of the women here have talked about how it's
not even about abortion. What about it if it's a
health concern and you have to have a certain procedure.
I would love to to have your your thoughts on that,
because now I feel like it's a little scary to
be pregnant in general, because anything can happen. The mortality
rate of black women of people of color in this
country when it comes to pregnancy and going to the
(30:12):
hospital is so high. It's like, I think, the worst
in the world. The numbers here in the United States
are staggering. It feels like we're living on another planet.
So I'd love to get your thoughts on someone who's
thinking and considering about getting pregnant one day.
Speaker 5 (30:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Well, I'm in my late thirties. You know, I'm thirty
seven and I've thought about it. I have endometriosis, i
have hormone issues, so I'm on hormone therapy and I'm
not on birth control right now, So there's a chance
I can get pregnant at any time. And there's also
a chance because I am taking to stosterone, you know,
drops that my baby, my unborn child can have you know,
(30:52):
is the health issues or what I'm looking for the
word birth defectations? Yeah, complications, you know, and I'm well
aware of that.
Speaker 3 (31:00):
You know.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
It's just it's difficult because I'm like, Okay, well, what
if I do encounter that situation. Am I going to
have to or I can't. I can't have an abortion?
And if I do have one, am I going to
be Is it going to be?
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Am I going to be?
Speaker 1 (31:12):
You know, obviously with some of my family members, it'll
be frowned upon.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
Am I a bad person?
Speaker 1 (31:19):
You know?
Speaker 4 (31:19):
I've thought about that.
Speaker 1 (31:20):
I'm like, oh, should I keep this child even if
it does have like birth defects? Now we have those
resources to see, to see, you know, and to have
that choice. But it makes you I shouldn't feel guilty,
you know what I mean, because I have wanted to wait,
because I did raise my siblings, because I do have
a career going on right now, and it just it
(31:40):
does it concerns me.
Speaker 4 (31:42):
It, Like I said, I've said the word upset.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
It makes me very angry, but it does you know,
I think of my my sisters as well. You know.
It's just it's just really sad that this is our
reality right now. And I'm I'll say, madame uchosentimiento because
I personally, I've thought about it a lot.
Speaker 4 (32:01):
Because of my age, I really.
Speaker 6 (32:03):
Have well to share a little bit just based on
your thoughts. I'm married. My husband and I have been
having the conversations about trying to get pregnant for quite
some time, and we did get pregnant last year. I
was four months along and my doctor told me that
due to health issues, I would have to terminate my child.
(32:27):
And it was a child that we really really wanted,
and I got a second opinion about it. I did
every possible thing, you know, that we could have done
in that moment to make the best decision for ourselves,
for our family with our doctors, and I still had
to terminate the child at four months. And so when
(32:50):
I heard the news, it was not only was it triggering,
but also I was scared as hell. I was like, yes,
we live in a state where some of the those
rights are still protected, but if I had been in
any other state, I would have been prosecuted. I would
have been sent to jail potentially because I was making
an arm.
Speaker 5 (33:10):
I'm so sorry. We're lifting you with life.
Speaker 6 (33:15):
I thank you, thank you very much. So I totally
understand that those health concerns that you're talking about, and
for for all the women out there who are who
are considering getting pregnant, that is a real concern. So
before we close out today, any any last thoughts that
(33:35):
anybody would like to share on a personal level or
just an overall thought on on today's topic.
Speaker 5 (33:42):
I'll just say thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
I mean, it's these conversations are where we continue the fight,
you know, because fighting is not about violence, it's not
about this. It's trying to figure out how we can
build a bridge between you know, what people understand and
what they don't.
Speaker 5 (33:58):
So thank you.
Speaker 2 (33:59):
It was an honor for me, and I hope to
see a future where I'm not worried about my potential
child's rights.
Speaker 5 (34:06):
So let's work towards that. Thank you so much.
Speaker 7 (34:09):
It's really wonderful to be amongst other Latino women who
are moving this conversation forward because the Latin community, you know,
tends to feel.
Speaker 5 (34:16):
Differently on this issue.
Speaker 7 (34:17):
So it's actually really inspiring that we're all here kind
of beating to the same drum.
Speaker 4 (34:24):
Yeah, I couldn't agree more.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
It's lovely to see how intellectual and informed everyone is
and help passionate more than anything. So I'm so grateful
that I was able to have this conversation with you guys. Arlene,
thank you so much, Patty and Emily, like jem you
guys honestly thank you and everyone. You guys can binge
the entire season of Out of the Shadows. Now, Patty,
(34:47):
do you want to tell us what the podcast is
about real quick?
Speaker 3 (34:51):
Yes, So Out of the Shadows tells the moment in
history when President Ronald Reagan signed a bill that gave
over three million immigrants amnesty, essentially allowing uh them and
their children the opportunity to come out of the shadows
and work toward the American dream. And we are a
product of that children of eighty six.
Speaker 5 (35:13):
I love that.
Speaker 4 (35:13):
Share your socials too, so everyone can find you.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Well, you can go out of the show find or
you can go in our own world part of the
podcast network.
Speaker 5 (35:23):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
Listen when we're not in our own nice with Cheeky's
I'm telling you.
Speaker 5 (35:29):
If we're not here, we're there. So this is a
fam bam, join the family.
Speaker 4 (35:33):
Listen to us, love.
Speaker 3 (35:37):
Beautiful.
Speaker 4 (35:38):
Did you share your your your social on Yes.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
You can find me on Instagram at Patti Rodriguez.
Speaker 4 (35:46):
Yes, and Emily as we become friends.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
Yes, Emily and jem You guys, tell me a little
bit about your podcast and share socials please.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
Oh man, So we have a space travel pod podcast.
It's the cheapest space travel you'll ever do because we
actually don't go to space just in our minds.
Speaker 5 (36:05):
Don't tell me. I don't know that we're a couple.
That sounds fun.
Speaker 7 (36:12):
It is fun.
Speaker 5 (36:13):
It is fun.
Speaker 7 (36:13):
That's a good word to describe the podcast. We kind
of take our ship anywhere that the wind blows to
talk about the things that are important to us, the
things that are going on in our lives. Introduce some
of the quirky members of our of our world surrounding us,
and yeah, you can find us anywhere. Really, you know, social.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Media is yeah, you can find us in our own
world pod on Instagram. Our mayansta is Emily Underscore, Stefan
and gems is.
Speaker 7 (36:38):
Oh La Geminy, which is.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Oh I love that gemany perfect. No, Thank you guys.
Thank you guys again. I really enjoyed this conversation. It
is a heavy one, but at the end of the day,
the more that we have these conversations be better for
the world, and we should really be loud and proud.
So you guys, everyone that's listening. We have some abortion
(37:03):
resources for you in our show notes, so please check
those out. This episode will also be available on YouTube search,
makea podcast network and subscribe. I'm your host Cheeky's and
I hope you enjoyed this roundtable discussion and les hope
you guys learned a thing or two and I will.
Speaker 4 (37:20):
See you next Monday.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Bessos, do you need advice on love, relationships, health emails?
I'm so excited to share with you that my Cheekys
and Chill podcast will have an extra episode drop each week.
I'll be answering all your questions. Just leave me a
voice message. All you have to do is go to
(37:46):
speak pipe dot com slash Cheekys and Chill Podcast and
record your questions.
Speaker 4 (37:51):
I can't wait to hear from you.
Speaker 1 (37:56):
This is a production of iHeartRadio and Mike podcast Network.
Follow us on Instagram at my Quintura podcasts and follow
me Cheeky's That's c h i q u i s.
For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
I highly believe that I am no one to tell
another woman, another being what they can and cannot do
with their body, like who am I?
Speaker 2 (00:14):
The bottom line is equality and that's something that we
haven't gotten to yet, and that's why this issue is
so feels so large right now.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Women are always fighting for all rights and it's time
for men to step up.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Hello everyone, and welcome to a very special episode of
Cheeky's and Chill Today. I'm joined by a few guests
to talk about a very important topic, reproductive rights. Back
in June, the Supreme Court struck down Roe versus Weight.
It's a previous landmark decision that granted women access to
legal abortions for almost fifty years.
Speaker 4 (00:58):
So let's get into it. This is Cheeky's and Chill.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
With Me today is Patti Rodriguez, co host of the
Michael Dura podcast Out of the Shadows.
Speaker 4 (01:13):
Hi, Patti, how are you?
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Hi? Cheeky's thank you so much for having me here
and inviting me to talk about something that's really important
for our community, not just for all women, but for
our community.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
I agree, Thank you so much. I'm so Greatefu, I'm
so excited to hear what you have to say. We
also have Emily Stefan and her partner Jem. Can I
call you Jem, Yes? Yes, Ernandez, their host of in
our own world.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
Welcome, ladies, how are you?
Speaker 2 (01:42):
We are great, We're so honored to be here. We
are part of the Michael Duda iHeart family. We are women,
we are queer women, and that's an interesting perspective for
us to analyze this argument. So thank you for inviting us.
Speaker 5 (01:54):
Thank you so much. Cheeky's. We're so excited to be here.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
And last, but not least, we have our Lean Sat,
a development producer on the Microtura Network and Today's moderator.
She's also very knowledgeable on this topic. So, hi, Arlen,
how are you high?
Speaker 6 (02:10):
Cheeky's High, Ladies, how's everybody doing?
Speaker 4 (02:13):
We're good, awesome, I'm ready.
Speaker 6 (02:15):
This is such an important topic and I'm so grateful
that you were able to lend your platform for us
to have this conversation. We know that reproductive justice, the
reproductive rights is an issue that disproportionately affects people from
the Black, Indigenous and from our community. We know that
this isn't just a woman's issue, that this is an
issue that affects trans people as well as non binary people,
(02:37):
and we've all had some time to process the Supreme
Court's decision to overturn Roe v.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
Wade.
Speaker 6 (02:43):
So, without getting too much into the nitty gritty, I'd
love for this conversation to be us highlighting voices from
our community. So let's kick things off with you, Cheeky's.
Where were you when you heard the Supreme Court overturned
Roe v. Wade. What were your initial thoughts and what
were your initial feelings?
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Oh my god goodness. I was in Dominican Republic. Actually,
I was out there for my birthday, celebrating with some girlfriends,
and I heard the news and I was just like,
honestly flabbergasted.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
I was upset.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
I was like, what is happening in the world? We
were leaving in twenty twenty two? Like I automatically, I
posted something, reposted something, and of course I got some
backlash people in my DMS, you know, saying and giving
me their opinions, and I was going to do this
whole TikTok. I actually still have it saved, and I
never posted it. It's crazy because I tried recording it
like three four times because it would cut me off
(03:36):
and it's just there and I never posted it. So
I said, you know what, I'm going to take it
to my podcast because I think it is something that
not just because I'm an artist and I'm a singer
and I should just stay away from politics. I think
it's it is my god given right to speak about
my thoughts and how I feel and help other people,
you know, And that's what I'm doing, you know. But
(03:57):
it was it was definitely disappointing for me.
Speaker 5 (04:01):
Patty.
Speaker 6 (04:02):
What about you? Where were you? What do you remember
from that day and what were you feeling?
Speaker 3 (04:06):
You know? Interesting enough, I was actually landing into Washington,
d C. I was there for a convention and that
evening after we wrapped up, took an over to the
Supreme Court and there was just so many feelings and
emotions there, so much anger. I think. I think as
(04:30):
as a country, we're just so discouraged by our government
and the the the fact that this is this is
their framing what's happening as this religious reason, when I
think the reality is not, that's not true. It's not
(04:50):
it's it's I feel that it's about control and it
and that's what's heartbreaking and what I feel we're not
really understanding.
Speaker 6 (05:00):
Agreed, We're definitely going to talk about how our culture
and religion intersegt. But before we do that, Emily Gemini,
I'd love to hear your thoughts. Where were you when
you hurt the news and what were your initial feelings.
Speaker 7 (05:13):
I think we were together, weren't we when we found
this out?
Speaker 2 (05:18):
To be honest, I don't remember the exact time and place,
but what I do remember is the moment that I
realized that they're trying to make us feel that history
is further away than it is. We're still living in
a lifetime when women couldn't vote, when slavery was legal.
You know, we have to take a step back and
say yes, you know, at least in certain directions, we're
(05:40):
going in the right direction. However, we're still in a
world where we are discriminating against so many people that
live among us, and some of those people is gender sexuality,
like you mentioned. But the bottom line is equality and
that's something that we haven't gotten to yet. And that's
why this issue is so feels so large right now,
(06:02):
because we feel like we're in a bigger room than
we are. They used to put things in history books
in black and white that were in color to make
us feel like they were further away than they were.
We need to be on the front line still being
these voices and these platforms that you are offering us,
because that's how we're going to change is continuing the conversation. Before,
(06:23):
back in the day, you could even say the word
gay women and voting.
Speaker 5 (06:27):
Ha ha. That's a joke.
Speaker 7 (06:29):
You know.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Now we're able to talk about it. But we're still fighting.
So that's why we're here. That's why we're having the conversation.
I don't remember when, but I every day remember how
important it is, and that's what sticks with me. But yeah,
you remember, I guess yeah.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
I mean I think there was one thing that I
read somewhere that it just stuck with me the whole day,
which was the daughters that are being born today are
being born with less rights than the country that I
was born into because I was lucky enough to be
born in America. And like Emily said, this is a
way bigger thing. And like you said, Patty, this is
much bigger than just the rights that uterus bearing individuals
(07:05):
to speak of, everyone that this affects are trying to protect.
This is about bodily autonomy. This is about anyone not
allowing or not allowing the government to have a say
on what we do with our bodies. That's our god
given right, and I think that more than anything. It
was disheartening to hear that news, but more fuel to
(07:27):
keep pushing forward for a better future.
Speaker 4 (07:30):
For sure.
Speaker 6 (07:31):
Patty, you touched on this a little bit about this
idea that our community. You know, we come from a
culture where religion is sort of deeply rooted in who
we are. Of course, not everyone comes from a religious background,
not everyone was raised in that in that way, but
it is part of who we are as a community.
(07:51):
So Cheeky's I'd love for you to kick this question
off as well. You're someone who has said you believe
in God, but you're more of a spiritual person. Now,
how do those two things intersect? For you? Can someone
be religious and also be pro choice?
Speaker 1 (08:08):
You know what, I think anyone can be whatever they want,
you know what I mean? I guess in speaking for myself,
you know, growing up in a religious home, you know,
we were Christian, A lot of fear was instilled, a
lot of you know, if you don't do this, this
is gonna happen, you're gonna go straight to hell. And
(08:30):
for a long time I believed it, you know, And
thankfully I had an epiphany one day. And I am
definitely more spiritual than religious, and and I'm just the
type of person that respects everyone's decisions.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
I'm very much live and let live.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
And I think that, yeah, I mean, maybe you can
be religious and be a pro choice, but I highly doubted.
I haven't seen someone. And that's what upsets me the
most about this whole thing is that they keep throwing
the Bible at me or at us, and just throwing
in what the Bible says and religion, and it's so
much it's not it's not about that. It's so much
more than that, you know. But for sure, people in
(09:10):
my family that I know, obviously, they they think that
I cannot say that I love God and be okay
with this is what they've they have told me.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
I'm sorry, but I just have to say one incredible thing.
God and religion are two different things in my opinion,
because you can believe in God, you can believe in
the Almighty power, whatever connection you have with your God, right,
but religion as a construct is man made. Those books
were written by humans, passed down by people who were faulted,
(09:45):
who had issues themselves. So I believe in God, but religion,
I'm not sure. And that doesn't mean that I'm not
somebody who has faith, you know, so right, that's where
I feel for me that that line.
Speaker 6 (09:57):
Since you know, Patty, what about you? I know that
you have some strong feelings about this, and it's a complicated.
It can be a complicated conversation to have, especially when
we're talking to people in our family who are very religious,
(10:18):
like Cheeky said, and even sometimes talking to the older generation.
How do those two things play out for you? Being
religious and being pro choice?
Speaker 3 (10:26):
It is very complicated because I believe in God, I
believe in a higher power, I believe in life. But
I also I have a very hard time understanding the
the the motives behind all of this. If you if
you're these individuals who are making these decisions for us,
if they really believe and these babies, and you know
(10:50):
they they they would they would invest in resources to
ensure that every child survives and thrives. That to me
is what just it makes it angers me because if
it was really about the children, we would be investing
and creating a foundation for investing in ensuring that our
(11:15):
children are healthy, that they're not living in poverty, that
their parents and family have a foundation to be able
to raise their children in the way that we should
all be raised. And that's not happening in this country.
It's not happening. So if you can't just the minute
that a child's born, this government completely forgets about our children.
(11:35):
We have the lowest education rates in the entire world.
Our children are not provided with the resources that they
need to thrive in this country and in the world,
and that is what's heartbreaking. So while I believe in life,
and I believe that in God, in the Higher Power,
what I don't believe is the reasoning behind the control
(11:56):
that is being imposed on us. Don't come to me
with this, with this crap, because it really is.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
It is it is.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
It is frustrating because they are they're using this as
a control mechanism. And I, like CHICKI said, you decide,
you have the right to choose what to do. We
have the right to choose what to do with our bodies.
(12:24):
And there's no other body that is being control the
way reproductive people's bodies are controlled and if we don't
see that reality, then this is only the beginning to
just be just a bigger heartbreak and problems in this country.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
I also love what you mentioned that go ahead, Jermany.
Speaker 7 (12:52):
Yeah, sorry, it just to me. We got me thinking, Patty,
it's really funny. How also, we are trying to solve
the problem of unwanted prenancies by looking at women. But
last time I checked, women can't impregnate themselves. It is
a man who impregnates a woman. So why haven't we
focused the conversation to them?
Speaker 5 (13:10):
And that's when you know.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I'm a mother, I'm a mother to two boys, and
I want, I am hoping that I raised my children,
my two boys, knowing that this is not just a
woman's problem. And I hope other parents listening feel the
same way too. And you know, we also see that
(13:32):
when it comes down to this, it's always us who
are the loudest. Women are always fighting for all rights,
and it's time for men to step up because this
is not just our problem. And as parents and mothers,
we have a responsibility to raise boys to know that
(13:54):
they're sharing the world with women and they're just as
much responsible for it than we are, and it's it's
enough that we're the only ones always fighting, and it's
it's heartbreaking and frustrating.
Speaker 6 (14:09):
Cheekuz I hear you. I want to have some strong
thoughts on that one speak on that.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
Yes, no, absolutely, I mean yes, it's not just like
like Jim said, you know, it's we don't impregnate ourselves,
you know, so we shouldn't just be the only ones
held quote nuote accountable, you know. And I highly believe
that I am no one to tell another woman, another
being what they can and cannot do with their body.
Speaker 4 (14:35):
Like who who am I?
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Like?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
That's am I gonna take care of the child? Am
I gonna say no, don't have an abortion, I'll take
care of it. Like That's where I'm like, Okay, all
these people that are voting and that are saying, okay, yes,
you know these women should not have abortions. Okay, Well
are you gonna take care of them? Are you gonna
provide for these children? You know? Because then we have
an even bigger problem. Like if you have if you're
(14:56):
forced to have an unwanted child, there's gonna be a
resentment there from the parent to the child. The child
is gonna grow up upset, and it's gonna cause so
many It's.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
The worst you can do. It's the worst you can
do to a human being. Bring him to a world
where there's no love or they feel no support, wanted,
no support not just by the person birthing them, but
by the entire country and the government. There's absolutely zero
support for these children.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Not only that, speaking as a queer woman, you know,
I have been with men in my life. I've experienced
what it is to feel the responsibility of being a
woman in a sexual relationship, because that's another thing. When
you're with a male, I feel like oftentimes you feel like, oh,
it's my problem, Like if this happens to me, it's
on me.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
You know, I have to.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
Tell the guy and figure it out, and it's my burden. Absolutely,
not like jem and we're just speaking about. However, at
the same time, you know, we have to acknowledge that
as queer women, when we decide to have a child,
that we have to plan that, we have to figure
out what we're going to do, how best to love
that child, how best to find somebody that needs love,
(16:08):
and we have the resources that we can give them.
And so for example, there are so many children that
perhaps somebody doesn't have the resources or love or you know,
mental stability, which is so fair because mental health is
a really big thing, and if you're not in a
mentally well place, you should not be preparing people for
this world, or even after or.
Speaker 7 (16:26):
Even after pregnancy postpadum depression of course.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
Which is again very real and an entire entire thing
that needs to be respected and talked about more because
there's a lot of shame about it. But anyway, so
when we make the decision to go down that path
to find our child, you know, then we are going
to love that child as if it is our own
and give it the life that it deserves, which is
why there are opportunities out there for people to be loved,
(16:51):
just like in nature, just like we see in nature.
Speaker 3 (16:54):
You know, m hm.
Speaker 6 (16:56):
Y'all talked about this a lot about this idea, how
if this was really about pro life and about the children,
then we would really be providing for those children after
they are born. And there's this element of economic control.
Latinas people of color are already paid at such a
lower rate than your white male person is in this country.
(17:21):
Can we talk about that a little bit about the
economic control and how this could potentially prevent women from
going to college, from moving out of their parents' house,
from becoming independent. I'd love to hear y'all's thoughts on that, Patty,
Can we start with you.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Yeah, as a mother to two children, motherhood is the hardest,
especially as a parent trying to navigate a career. My
mom came to this country from Mexico and she had
three children, and I honestly don't know how she did it.
(18:01):
I would say, at the expense of her mental health.
And it shouldn't be that way from others. It needs
a village, and we no longer have that village. Our
ancestors had villages. It was a community that raised children.
You never it's you don't raise children alone. That's not
(18:22):
you don't do that. But somehow in this culture, in
this country's culture, you're supposed to raise your children alone
at the expense of your mental health and your physical
health as well. And what happens is it sets women
back because again there's no support for childcare. You're not
(18:42):
able to It's a lot challenging for you to move
on into your career or as a mother because you're
no longer living for yourself. You're you're living for a
child that needs special care, and not just for a
few hours. Today we're talking about twenty four hours a day,
seven days a week, and in this country, we have
(19:06):
zero support. And me, as an entrepreneur, a writer, a producer,
a creator, I owe that to my village. I was
able and I had the privilege to be able to
bring my aunt from Mexico to help me care for
my children for the first years of their life. Without her,
(19:28):
I wouldn't be sitting here with you all. I wouldn't
have the career that I have, the businesses that I
have because it takes a village. And it's really unfortunate
that women have to choose to and that's what this
country is having us to do, to choose, and we
(19:48):
shouldn't have to choose. We need to bring back our villages.
Women of privilege have their villages that don't talk about it.
Speaker 4 (20:01):
But they pay for their villages.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Yes, they have their drivers that take their kids to school,
They have housekeepers that care for their homes. They have
a nanny for each child, they have tutoring classes, they
have after school programs that they can pay for it
takes a village to raise children, and our community doesn't
have that. So when you when the government implements this
(20:25):
control on us, it's only going to affect us, and
no one's doing anything about it, and we should be
really angry.
Speaker 6 (20:34):
Yes, Cheeks, what about you? You care for your siblings.
I know that you're not a mother yet, but you
are sort of the matriarch of your family right now.
Can you talk a little bit about those kind of
responsibilities and the dynamics of what it means to now
have this access taken from you?
Speaker 1 (20:53):
Well, I mean growing up with a mother of a
five children, a single mother of five children. I hear
what Patti's saying, and I saw firsthand how difficult it was,
and because I was the eldest, what I had to
do had me at fifteen. For her, it was especially
living at my grandparents' home. Like abortion was absolutely not
(21:16):
a choice and it was expensive, so she didn't know
what to do. And I grew up seeing that, you know,
she says, I thought about it.
Speaker 5 (21:23):
I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I didn't want to have you, but I had no choice,
And you know, it was difficult growing up and knowing that, obviously,
But I'm glad. I'm glad she had me, you know,
but I think she had my support. But it was
also very difficult on me because I had to give
up so many things in my childhood to help my mom.
I don't regret it, but that's just my reality. And
(21:44):
now that she's not here, I mean, she taught me
so much. I learned so much, and and it's difficult,
you know, it's difficult, and and it's I've had to
help raise my siblings and I'm telling you, you know, tutoring.
Tutoring is expensive, and I wish that they would help
us more with child care, you know what I mean.
Johnny was eleven years old when my mom passed.
Speaker 4 (22:05):
I didn't know what to do.
Speaker 1 (22:06):
I was trying to figure out my life and I'm like,
how do I You know, it was just a lot,
I mean, especially even growing up. I mean, we weren't
born with a silver spoon in our mouth, you know,
and it was it was hard. It was definitely hard.
So that's one thing that it's just it upsets me
and I just even if it is someone that had
(22:27):
consensual sex and she just doesn't want to have the
baby with this guy or whoever it may be Why
why force someone you know what I mean? Or what
if it's I just heard something like I don't know,
like two months ago, someone I believe a little girl
in Ohio I think she was ten years old who
was raped and she had to travel I don't know
where because she couldn't have an abortion.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
Where she was from.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
So I'm just like, what freaking world are we living in?
Like this is ridiculous to me. And just because I'm
pro choice doesn't mean i'm pro abortion. I'm not one
to say use abortion as birth can. I'm just saying,
don't tell me what I can do with my body,
you know what I mean, Like don't don't that's not
it's not okay with me. It makes me feel very uncomfortable,
(23:09):
and it makes it worries me for my future children,
you know, or like that, you know what I mean,
Like what what's going on? We have to stand up
and we have to have these hard conversations, and they're
going to be uncomfortable to some people, but I think
it's very important for for you know, future generations to come.
Speaker 6 (23:32):
Emily and Jim, what about you and your perspective from
the queer community. I would love to get your thoughts
on it, and you're also gen zers.
Speaker 5 (23:41):
Actually we're millennials. We are not. Okay, yes, there.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
Gen zers, but you know millennials are better just saying
little I.
Speaker 7 (23:54):
Know, you know, cheeky's I was thinking when when I
was listening to you speak, it's it's you're absolutely right.
Also makes me wonder what Coven's next. If they were
able to take this from us, what else can they take?
And that's the thing is that Roe v. Wade was
sort of an umbrella law where it did discuss other
parts of pregnancy. How should I say this? Pregnancy things
(24:17):
like concepts, pregnancy issues, thank you, health pregnancy issues like contraceptives,
the right to have a cesarean different things that are
then put into question. I mean, let's not pretend like
we didn't all probably hear Justice Clarence Thomas mentioned gay
marriage is something that.
Speaker 5 (24:32):
We should look at.
Speaker 7 (24:34):
So it's it's it's extremely wearisome and I couldn't agree
with you more. It's not even about the valid truth
of the ten year old who had to go to
an obscene amount of length to have an abortion, or
the women who are at risk of dying themselves, or
the parents who are loving parents who are excited and
have prepared for a child who unfortunately was not able
(24:56):
to develop their vital organs. All of these other situations
that are extremely valid where the life of the child
is put over the life of the mother. But just
the regular Susan or Tom, or the person who just
simply ended up pregnant, be it because of something severe
or something that occurred to them as terrible as a
(25:17):
sexual harassment or even rape, or simply I, like you said,
I met this person and this happened, and I'm not
ready for this in my life, and why would I
bring a child into a life that I'm not prepared
to raise them in?
Speaker 2 (25:27):
So yeah, I uh, cheeky's you said something that I
want to be fair and I'm going to be honest
because you said, oh, well, you know, I wasn't born
with the silver spoon in my mouth. I was when
I was born, I wanted for nothing. I had my village,
right Because here's the funny thing. My parents not only
do they have that village, that is the Latino culture,
(25:50):
which is auelas and auelas. And I can call my
mom right now and she'll be here in ten minutes.
If I need her. And also I had the ability of, oh,
if I needed to call a driver, which I never did,
but I'm saying I had the ability to, you know,
like I didn't want for anything. And that perspective to
me says okay, Like you said, most of the uterusparing
human beings who are having this experience, right, they are
(26:13):
not the ones making the decisions. The ones making the
decisions are the ones with the silver spoon, the one
that can travel to whatever city they want to acquire
that doctor and acquire that medical procedure. The women who
are dying or are not the people who are making
the decisions. We're going to have a loss of women
that is catastrophic as a result of You cannot stop
(26:33):
people doing what they need and want to do.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
What you're going to do.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Is stop them from getting adequate care to do so
it is not going to stop. It is going to
keep going. And then as well, as a result of that,
as a gay woman, you mentioned, well, how do you
feel as a gay woman? Jem said something to me
the other day that I was like, I never even
thought of that, because as a woman, I feel so
passionately about my body and it's a shame that I
(26:58):
do because we are looked at in such an objective way. However,
as a gay woman, what happens when I have a
straight daughter? What happens when I have a daughter who
is out there in the world that is my tribe
that I need to take care of, who now, like
Jem says, grew up in a world with less rights
than me.
Speaker 5 (27:19):
That is ridiculous For what.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
For me to say in three months time that now
her and I can't get married if we want to,
that we're afraid that if I'm dying in the hospital room,
she can't come in to say goodbye like these are.
That's why you say, be loud, be proud, and our
culture supports those things because we are a tribe and
we've always operated that way, and there's no shame in that.
Speaker 5 (27:42):
It's about balance.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
That's all aout you mad, You've mentioned something very very
important that needs to be repeated. Abortions are not going
to end ever they've been They've have been happening since
the beginning of time. So let's be everyone listening to
me very clear about that. What's going to stop from
(28:06):
what's going to stop from happening is access to adequate
health for these women save abortions, and that's what we
need to be protecting adequate health for these women. So
whether you're if you're pro life, you're pro adequate health.
That's what you should be fighting for.
Speaker 5 (28:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (28:29):
Well, speaking on that, Patty, I'd love to get your thoughts.
I know that you're a mom, You're raising two boys.
How is this going to impact their lives? Other children's
lives who are growing up in this type of society
where we're limiting uh, reproductive justice, reproductive rights. I would
(28:51):
love to if you can share what kind of conversations
you've had with them, if you've had any conversations with
them so far.
Speaker 3 (28:58):
My children are still very young there, there are still babies,
so I'm not there. I but what I want to
as as our mother is raise them to believe and
to understand that this is not just a woman's problem.
This is also their problem and they have to join
(29:21):
the fight as well when they're ready. And that's what
I hope that when they are ready to do that,
they also are as loud as we are.
Speaker 7 (29:31):
M hmm.
Speaker 6 (29:33):
Yeah. And what about you, cheeky is I know you've
shared your wishes that you hope to have children of
your own one day. Yeah, how are you? How are
you seeing this, the overturning of Roe v.
Speaker 4 (29:46):
Wade.
Speaker 6 (29:46):
How is that going to impact you and your decisions?
Speaker 5 (29:49):
Uh?
Speaker 6 (29:50):
Some of the women here have talked about how it's
not even about abortion. What about it if it's a
health concern and you have to have a certain procedure.
I would love to to have your your thoughts on that,
because now I feel like it's a little scary to
be pregnant in general, because anything can happen. The mortality
rate of black women of people of color in this
country when it comes to pregnancy and going to the
(30:12):
hospital is so high. It's like, I think, the worst
in the world. The numbers here in the United States
are staggering. It feels like we're living on another planet.
So I'd love to get your thoughts on someone who's
thinking and considering about getting pregnant one day.
Speaker 5 (30:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Well, I'm in my late thirties. You know, I'm thirty
seven and I've thought about it. I have endometriosis, i
have hormone issues, so I'm on hormone therapy and I'm
not on birth control right now, So there's a chance
I can get pregnant at any time. And there's also
a chance because I am taking to stosterone, you know,
drops that my baby, my unborn child can have you know,
(30:52):
is the health issues or what I'm looking for the
word birth defectations? Yeah, complications, you know, and I'm well
aware of that.
Speaker 3 (31:00):
You know.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
It's just it's difficult because I'm like, Okay, well, what
if I do encounter that situation. Am I going to
have to or I can't. I can't have an abortion?
And if I do have one, am I going to
be Is it going to be?
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Am I going to be?
Speaker 1 (31:12):
You know, obviously with some of my family members, it'll
be frowned upon.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
Am I a bad person?
Speaker 1 (31:19):
You know?
Speaker 4 (31:19):
I've thought about that.
Speaker 1 (31:20):
I'm like, oh, should I keep this child even if
it does have like birth defects? Now we have those
resources to see, to see, you know, and to have
that choice. But it makes you I shouldn't feel guilty,
you know what I mean, because I have wanted to wait,
because I did raise my siblings, because I do have
a career going on right now, and it just it
(31:40):
does it concerns me.
Speaker 4 (31:42):
It, Like I said, I've said the word upset.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
It makes me very angry, but it does you know,
I think of my my sisters as well. You know.
It's just it's just really sad that this is our
reality right now. And I'm I'll say, madame uchosentimiento because
I personally, I've thought about it a lot.
Speaker 4 (32:01):
Because of my age, I really.
Speaker 6 (32:03):
Have well to share a little bit just based on
your thoughts. I'm married. My husband and I have been
having the conversations about trying to get pregnant for quite
some time, and we did get pregnant last year. I
was four months along and my doctor told me that
due to health issues, I would have to terminate my child.
(32:27):
And it was a child that we really really wanted,
and I got a second opinion about it. I did
every possible thing, you know, that we could have done
in that moment to make the best decision for ourselves,
for our family with our doctors, and I still had
to terminate the child at four months. And so when
(32:50):
I heard the news, it was not only was it triggering,
but also I was scared as hell. I was like, yes,
we live in a state where some of the those
rights are still protected, but if I had been in
any other state, I would have been prosecuted. I would
have been sent to jail potentially because I was making
an arm.
Speaker 5 (33:10):
I'm so sorry. We're lifting you with life.
Speaker 6 (33:15):
I thank you, thank you very much. So I totally
understand that those health concerns that you're talking about, and
for for all the women out there who are who
are considering getting pregnant, that is a real concern. So
before we close out today, any any last thoughts that
(33:35):
anybody would like to share on a personal level or
just an overall thought on on today's topic.
Speaker 5 (33:42):
I'll just say thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
I mean, it's these conversations are where we continue the fight,
you know, because fighting is not about violence, it's not
about this. It's trying to figure out how we can
build a bridge between you know, what people understand and
what they don't.
Speaker 5 (33:58):
So thank you.
Speaker 2 (33:59):
It was an honor for me, and I hope to
see a future where I'm not worried about my potential
child's rights.
Speaker 5 (34:06):
So let's work towards that. Thank you so much.
Speaker 7 (34:09):
It's really wonderful to be amongst other Latino women who
are moving this conversation forward because the Latin community, you know,
tends to feel.
Speaker 5 (34:16):
Differently on this issue.
Speaker 7 (34:17):
So it's actually really inspiring that we're all here kind
of beating to the same drum.
Speaker 4 (34:24):
Yeah, I couldn't agree more.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
It's lovely to see how intellectual and informed everyone is
and help passionate more than anything. So I'm so grateful
that I was able to have this conversation with you guys. Arlene,
thank you so much, Patty and Emily, like jem you
guys honestly thank you and everyone. You guys can binge
the entire season of Out of the Shadows. Now, Patty,
(34:47):
do you want to tell us what the podcast is
about real quick?
Speaker 3 (34:51):
Yes, So Out of the Shadows tells the moment in
history when President Ronald Reagan signed a bill that gave
over three million immigrants amnesty, essentially allowing uh them and
their children the opportunity to come out of the shadows
and work toward the American dream. And we are a
product of that children of eighty six.
Speaker 5 (35:13):
I love that.
Speaker 4 (35:13):
Share your socials too, so everyone can find you.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Well, you can go out of the show find or
you can go in our own world part of the
podcast network.
Speaker 5 (35:23):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
Listen when we're not in our own nice with Cheeky's
I'm telling you.
Speaker 5 (35:29):
If we're not here, we're there. So this is a
fam bam, join the family.
Speaker 4 (35:33):
Listen to us, love.
Speaker 3 (35:37):
Beautiful.
Speaker 4 (35:38):
Did you share your your your social on Yes.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
You can find me on Instagram at Patti Rodriguez.
Speaker 4 (35:46):
Yes, and Emily as we become friends.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
Yes, Emily and jem You guys, tell me a little
bit about your podcast and share socials please.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
Oh man, So we have a space travel pod podcast.
It's the cheapest space travel you'll ever do because we
actually don't go to space just in our minds.
Speaker 5 (36:05):
Don't tell me. I don't know that we're a couple.
That sounds fun.
Speaker 7 (36:12):
It is fun.
Speaker 5 (36:13):
It is fun.
Speaker 7 (36:13):
That's a good word to describe the podcast. We kind
of take our ship anywhere that the wind blows to
talk about the things that are important to us, the
things that are going on in our lives. Introduce some
of the quirky members of our of our world surrounding us,
and yeah, you can find us anywhere. Really, you know, social.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Media is yeah, you can find us in our own
world pod on Instagram. Our mayansta is Emily Underscore, Stefan
and gems is.
Speaker 7 (36:38):
Oh La Geminy, which is.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Oh I love that gemany perfect. No, Thank you guys.
Thank you guys again. I really enjoyed this conversation. It
is a heavy one, but at the end of the day,
the more that we have these conversations be better for
the world, and we should really be loud and proud.
So you guys, everyone that's listening. We have some abortion
(37:03):
resources for you in our show notes, so please check
those out. This episode will also be available on YouTube search,
makea podcast network and subscribe. I'm your host Cheeky's and
I hope you enjoyed this roundtable discussion and les hope
you guys learned a thing or two and I will.
Speaker 4 (37:20):
See you next Monday.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Bessos, do you need advice on love, relationships, health emails?
I'm so excited to share with you that my Cheekys
and Chill podcast will have an extra episode drop each week.
I'll be answering all your questions. Just leave me a
voice message. All you have to do is go to
(37:46):
speak pipe dot com slash Cheekys and Chill Podcast and
record your questions.
Speaker 4 (37:51):
I can't wait to hear from you.
Speaker 1 (37:56):
This is a production of iHeartRadio and Mike podcast Network.
Follow us on Instagram at my Quintura podcasts and follow
me Cheeky's That's c h i q u i s.
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