June 17, 2025 • 54 mins
Hey Lil' Mommas and Gentiles-A-Like! We will be back with new episodes of My Momma Told Me next week. In the meantime, enjoy a classic with special guest KevOnStage and rate/review the podcast here. Bye b*tch!
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If you play with silver toys during a lightning storm, will you be struck down? Langston and David chat with KevOnStage (Here's The Thing Podcast) about this electrifying conspiracy theory. The guys trace things back to their "playing with action figures" days and wonder what toys were made of and how our curiosity got the best of us when learning about electricity. Whether you stick a fork in a socket or put a metal tuna can in the microwave, we were determined to get superpowers! Talks of ESP and Lou Rawls occur, but that's nothing really new to this podcast.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Trench coat. Roth was crazy. He just looked like a
sex offender. Oh yeah, as we grew up and the
world he made less.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
As a child, we didn't have enough frame of reference,
But as we grew we're like, you know, I wish
they'd stopped doing that. But yeah, And also, do you
think you saw a human olid turtle in a trench coat.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
You'd be like, man, that guy was weird.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
But oh well, and you're just going about your day
like it's not gonna happen.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Man, put some shoes on, you know what I'm saying.
That'd be great.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
There's like a lot of other moves you can Sorry,
you could do pants. Pants would be nice, were great.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
You have webbed feet.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
You got to like, come on, cause even if he
didn't have pants on, then it's like, Okay, this dude's
in a trench coat and nepads.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
That's already a problem.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
You got a big problem on it.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
That's already I'm thinking the.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Green legs, yelds are green, I see all that. Come on.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
The Fedora doesn't class it up enough, no, not to
notice green legs and knee.
Speaker 4 (01:01):
Pads and he's stinking like pizza.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Giant red flag.
Speaker 5 (01:08):
Yah, chips in yours a racist the.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Money turny stuff.
Speaker 4 (01:29):
I can't tell me as long as you know I
can have any man I want to. Baby, that's actual
and factual. Welcome back to another episode of My Mama
Told Me.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
The podcast where we dived deep, deep into the pockets
of black conspiracy theories.
Speaker 4 (01:50):
And we finally worked to prove that Shatasha Williams is
not just the long gone forgotten singer of the hook
of Thuggish Ruggish Bone, is in fact a founding member
of the group. They were the Bone Thugs and she
was the Harmony. Whoa that we didn't we I got you, Shatasha, Baby,
(02:11):
keep your head up.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
My name is David Bord. I'm lazy Germy. Now I
guess this already. He's already feeling it.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
I get people don't talk enough about Aunt Tasha. She said,
an Tasha, come on, and we ford about her, and
then we they said in the name Bone Thugs and Harmony.
We know they weren't singing, come on, justin Pasha. Thank you?
Bory Can I call you by?
Speaker 6 (02:35):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:35):
We just thought that's I prefer it, Bory Man. You
and you're protecting black women by not forgetting what their
accomplishments for what they did.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Man, that's what I'm talking about. Come on, sang all
of their names at the end of that song.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Listen in the house.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
The knee bone is connected to the girl bone, and
we forgot we forgot that part of the song. Oh man,
that's intense. That's damn. Do you think you think they're
ever sitting back and being like, damn, we really we
owe her something, We really fucked her over it.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
I feel like they must know because I have done
a deep bone dive, as we all have adults here.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Sure, if this were Cameron's podcast, we would have had
to pause you pretty hard there.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
But but this ain't that podcast. Pauses there we go gas,
no breaks, some good. That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 4 (03:29):
I just like I just talk, and sometimes it's it's
sometimes I talk about mouth meat stuff and it means
whatever you need it to mean.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
You gotta put that on your website.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Sometimes I talk.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
About mouth meat stuff that feels like a little bit
of a signature detail about you.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I wouldn't say it's I don't need to celebrate, It's
just you know.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
How we are excited. You've already heard his voice. Our
guest today. We've we've been trying to get him on
for a long time and it's finally happening. And he's
so funny and we're so grateful that he's here. He's
a comedian, a producer, a content creator, a person of
(04:11):
extraordinary breath and talents. He's wonderful, he's funny. You're gonna
love him. Please give it up for our guests. Mister
Kevi on stage, everybody, Man, there we go.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Nice. I got a few in there, I got a
few in the.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Thanks you guys for having me on the show man.
I'm excited to be here, man. This is this is
the way to kick off the year. You know, Hollywood.
We really just started working today for real, Yo, this
is like it feels like the first day back at school.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
And I'm glad to be doing this with y'all.
Speaker 6 (04:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
No, we're happier here. I was at my manager's office
this morning and they said something similar to that, and
I got real mad. I was like, y'all, niggas, what
I didn't work for nine months, bitch, what you mean
you just getting started today?
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Take the first off. There's work to be done.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Yeah, what the fuck are you talking about? Get your
bad ass back in the office and make some calls
that aren't going to turn into anything. But call them anyway.
Speaker 4 (05:16):
I'm trying to read for the in the House reboot.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
And just lie to me. At least tell me I
made some calls. They pad tell me something.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
That's all. That's all I'm asking for is give me.
Make me believe you. Try do that thing where a
car is coming and we trot across the street and
we're not going any faster than when we be walking.
But but trot. Show me the trot job.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
Man, that's a big that's a big way that I
show people how I care about them. Yeah, the little
trot I just picked the shoulders up. The feet does
not change.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
The feet doesn't change at all.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
But give your mind.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
That's all we're looking ass for.
Speaker 3 (06:02):
That's how you're getting asked for it.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
keV.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
You came to us with the conspiracy theory that uh
that I don't think I had ever heard before.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Bory, where do you I've heard this before?
Speaker 3 (06:15):
You have heard this? That's okay, great, So so I'm
the only idiot here. But you said, my mama told.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Me never played with silver toys when there's lightning outside
or you will be struck down exactly. So you know,
growing up as we probably did, we're in the same generation.
You know, action figures were a big part of our life.
(06:42):
Ye I'm saying. We didn't have We didn't have iPads
and stuff like that. We had cartoon we played outside,
we had action figures. So at the time that I
that I learned of this conspiracy theory, I had a Shredder,
which was my prize villain. I was a big Turtles fan,
you know, I had. I had a couple of legit
Turtles and I ain't always get the actual toys. I
got versions of them, you know, like you know, like
(07:05):
I remember one year asked my dad for the Batman
coop with with you know what I'm saying, And it
came with Batman, and he just got me the coop.
It was in the box and the Batman was gone,
and I was like, what happened to the Batman? He
was like a kid in Africa. We wouldn't have nothing.
I was like, but he didn't just buy like a
coop Batman came in that box. Somebody had opened it
(07:27):
and taken the Batman out. And then somehow my dad
just got came in the possession of the coop, but
I was I have nobody to put in the in
the coop, so I just had a random g I
Joe man in the coop. It just didn't hit the same.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
He was just hanging out in the back of it.
Came out and being like, y'all ain't about to throw
this away, right, That's good because I know a boy
who might like this quite a bit.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
The Salvation Army, Christmas gifts, you know whatever it was.
So he gave me like half of what I wanted.
But at this time I had, you know, I had
mostly off brand men.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
We called him men. I had mostly off brand men.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Just just.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Legally you had to call them men, not a figure.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
And saw that toys or rust are KB toys. They
saw that place that don't even sell toys. You know
what I'm saying, Oh yeah, swap the g I Jojo
g I exactly. They adjason right. So but this time
I had actually, if I think for like a birthday,
I had like four of the actual turtles and an
actual shredder. So these were like the Krim Dela Crim
(08:26):
of my toys. I play with them every day. So
I'm playing with them. You know what I'm saying, it's
a lightning storm and the power is out. So I'm
really like, oh, this is you know what I'm saying.
I'm playing with these actual figures.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
So my mom comes in and I got Shredder in
my right hand. Never I don't know why this is
such a vivid memory, Maybe because I was so confused
by what she was saying.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
And she was like, she's like, what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Boy? But put that down. You know you can't play
with no silver toy. You're gonna get struck down by lightning.
And I looked at the shredder and I'm like, this
is plastic. First of all, this is not And I
was not, like I've always been kind of a smart person.
I'm in my hand. I was young enough to know
that this cannot cannot conduct electricity at all? There is
(09:11):
and his shredder stuff was coming off right, you know what,
sing I played with the toy for real. It was
like brown. You know what I'm saying, It's like the
color of the skin under there.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
You get you get shredder in the bathtub one too
many times and that ain't shredder no more.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
It was just they were putting a lot of you know,
high quality stuff into these.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Man that's just a Japanese man in football year that ain't.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Yeah, yeah, wow, I did not know that.
Speaker 7 (09:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And the lore. I think there's a lot of lore
in Ninja Turtles about where Shredder and Splinter come from,
some of which suggests that they are connected directly, in
some of which they didn't know each other at all,
but always Shredder was like a big mob guy in
Japan that then finds its way in to uh, New York.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Somehow or something. I thought he was Italian for some reason.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
I'm gonna get you Turtles.
Speaker 4 (10:11):
That.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Look, do you guys have accents on your resume? Do
you have Italire accent proficient? Because if you don't have it,
you need to add it. Oh no, no, no, I
in the house. So yeah. So she was like, you know,
she wasn't fussy. She was just genuinely concerned, like put
(10:33):
this and I'm like, I'm inside the house. The windows
are closed. I was literally I didn't say any of
this because she's the black.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Mom like you're saying.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
But in my head, I'm like, how is lightning gonna
come through the world avoid all the objects outside that
are actual silver catalytic converters, everything that's in the world.
Go through my closed window and see this plastic shredder
in my hand and strike me with lightning. Like I
(11:02):
just was like, there's no way this could be true.
But I put it down. I picked up like rock
steady and bebop.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
She was like, all, I know that. You know.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
Those are purple.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
You know those a decent lightning fearing man. Go ahead,
enjoy yourself in the dark.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
But I just like, b I remember, I never bought
into it, like I don't have foil, I don't have
a fork. This is a plastic man with more plastic
that is just colored to look like silver.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
I can't die. And I never heard no other parents
say that. That was the first. It's actually interesting that
Bory had heard that because I wasn't like at the
other friend's house and they were like, man, you know
what I'm saying. Mone was on that, Like, I never
heard that before or from anybody else. But it's good
to know that that it's not that unusual.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
I've heard it just with metal in general, silver and specific.
I had just heard it in metal, don't be fucking around.
Oh got it, Yeah, lightning outside.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
I think that's what I had heard as well, is like,
you can't like be running around with forks when you
when it's lightning outside.
Speaker 4 (12:04):
Because to be completely honest, I don't have any silver
in the house now, I'm thirty six years old, Like
I don't.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Have We got to get you some silver.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Oh, you're not so much silverer right now. You got
so much silver, you.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Got somebody you gotta have silver.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
In your house.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
You I don't believe you.
Speaker 3 (12:24):
No, I don't have an ounce of silver exactly. Trust Yeah,
you're going crazy, you're doing it.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
I had always heard metal, like avoid obviously metal objects
holding metal during lightning scums. I had never heard silver specifically,
and I certainly had never then spread that out to
even silver appearing objects. Do you think that silver there
was a specific reasoning for silver for your mom.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
You know, it's funny that don't make sense. I feel
like maybe through the grape vine somebody said metal when
she just was like, silver's metal. I'm just gonna take
the metal part out on the silver because I've never
questioned that part until today. Metal. I would have believed
her even and the thing I think it was messed
with me is the toy was plastic. So I was
(13:19):
just like, this doesn't make any sense. But you know,
how do black parents learn anything? Right? Like, I'm the
Internet's really interesting because I'm realizing, like there's this meme
that goes vie everyone to the while. It's like if
you had this cover you was black, and it's like
a blanket I recognize, And I'm like, how did so
many black Where was this manufactured? Like so, I feel
(13:40):
like that information came through like that, like the way
those cookies became tens for like so and like who
makes Who's the first person that does that? Why do
we black people so many of us have that shared
experience that you know, there's no cookies in the cookie team,
but there's like soeing equipment or whatever. But I think
it was one of those things, Like I don't know
(14:00):
how this information got around, but.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
It does speak to the fact that, like to some extent,
the black community that we refer to did exist in
a much more active way when we were kids and
obviously when our parents were kids and all of that shit,
in part because they were all learning from the same
six like templates of people where it's like everybody just
(14:26):
learned the same six things, so we are in fact
a community, and now the Internet sort of disrupts the
ability for that to even be true anything, you know
what I mean?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
I feel like a lot of my life I've got,
I've taken so much word is back from just like
a dude sitting on the hood of a car.
Speaker 3 (14:45):
Yeah, it has a car.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
I guess the confidence is key man man.
Speaker 7 (14:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
I remember my mom once told me that, uh, that
Aretha Franklin's son had run off with what his name,
that he was the army dude in fucking different world.
And I can't remember his fucking name now, but he's
a very fantastic actor.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
Louis James.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Yeah, yes, mister.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Goddamn, I'm gonna be dude.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Yeah, he was in Fargo season five. Glenn Turman, Yes,
Glynn Turman. My mom told me for years that Glenn
Turman had had like a secret affair with Aretha franklin son.
They had run off together, and and that was why
her and Glenn Turman didn't make it and all this
ship and I've never even looked up to verify if
(15:40):
there's any truth to that, and I've never heard anyone
else make that claim.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
It was just my mom saying it, did you come home?
Speaker 4 (15:47):
We believed everybody was related. We were one of those
like take Ali was for sure, Mouhammed Ali's daughter. What
I quoted that too recently?
Speaker 3 (16:01):
Yeah, And they look it up and you're like, oh, no,
I don't think so.
Speaker 4 (16:04):
I think it's because I was like, well, there's not
that many famous black people.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
They must be relating.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Half down the line. I got to connect someone at
some point. There's a lot of Smith's, a lot of Jackson.
Is that crazy?
Speaker 1 (16:20):
Oh my god?
Speaker 3 (16:21):
So so your mom says this to you, You agree
to disagree, but you put down the shredder. Have you
carried any of this onward in your life? Have you
since been like weirdly superstitious or nervous around silver objects
in a lightning storm despite what you know logically to
(16:42):
be untrue inside of this.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
No, absolutely not.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
I think, as hard as it is to admit, I
didn't believe my mom. I just could not defy her.
And I think those are two separate things. Oh, in
my mind, I was just like, this is just not true.
But you know, small black children didn't really have a voice.
Growing up the way we we did, we really couldn't
(17:05):
question our parents. But I remember being like, this is
just not true. And if she weren't here, I would
be playing with this, and if I got struck by lightning,
I would have been really surprised like that.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
It's crazy. Let me tell you, as.
Speaker 4 (17:17):
Far as my family, large black men don't have much
of a voice. I'm still not pushing the line on things.
She says, Really, she's listening, she had a heart, she's
from a different country.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
I just, yeah, I don't know. Maybe that's maybe they
are sneaky. I don't.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Oh my god, my mom just tried to FaceTime me.
That's you fucked up on it, bro on it.
Speaker 3 (17:49):
Baby girl figured out how to get a feed and
she's she's listening to her exactly what you said.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yeah, she's listening. I'll call you back on I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (18:07):
I have a question for you guys, yes, specifically to
this because this because this one is big for me.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
How afraid of electricity were you as a child? Though?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Oh man, I have a funny story about this that
I haven't thought about in a long time. I was
a bright kid, but also not the brightest at all.
So upon learning about conducting electricity and metal and stuff
and how you shouldn't put forks in sockets, I went
home immediately one day and was like, nah, ain't no way.
(18:38):
And I promise y'all, as God is my witness, this
happened for real. Oh no, went home for school that day.
Take a fork, mediate sock, go to my room, close
hers socket.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
That.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
I love that. First of all, I love that you
needed privacy for.
Speaker 8 (18:53):
The he turned the lights down, candle, put that little
rolls on that they were talking about earlier.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
And now it's forking socket time.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Com please.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
You'll never find a fork like.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
So yeah, close the door, take this fork immediately, go
to the socket and no, no, no condom, no foreplay
jam it in on the socket, right, and I promise you.
I saw a bubble like I got shocked immediately, and
I saw what felt like a bubble the size of
(19:41):
like you remember those little like twenty five things you
buy a toy, you take them, so probably like half
of that.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Bubble go up my forearm. Oh no, all the way
up here.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Immediately I knew I was a superhero. I he said that.
I was like, oh my god, this is my because
you know, we watching X Men and Spider Man, they
all have that like event. And I spent the rest
of the day trying to, like, you know, kind of
like a Toby Maguire Spider Man like. I was like,
(20:18):
how do I get the electricity? I don't realize I
nearly probably killed myself.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
I am like, you're like, no, I know it's in me.
I just know how to.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
Active figured out how to activate this electric like I
should be flying, the electron should be flowing through me.
I'm a science experiment now, my hero or villain, it depends.
I don't know, it's too early to tell. The first
thing I gotta do is get these powers under control.
Spent like the whole afternoon doing that, and initially I
just was like, man, I'm kind of hungry, and I
(20:49):
made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and never revisited
that moment.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
First of all, I'm sorry that that happened to you.
I was hopeful too. I was hopeful that that story
ended with you having electric powers.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
No, it feels like an origin story for sure.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
Yeah, I was right there, man, the Spider bit me.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
I fell into the vat of science liquid and I
just no powers.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Man.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Yeah you did all right, though it's you did alright
for yourself. I too as a child, I wasn't as
afraid of it as much as I wanted to be
able to access some powers. And so many of like
great superheroes tend to come from like weird accidents like that. Yeah,
Like the Flash was my favorite growing up, Like I
(21:34):
wanted to be the Yeah. I was like, I'm a
run fast and so there would be times I wasn't
brave enough to stick a fork in a socket. But
there were times, and I remember this specifically, where like
we moved to this neighborhood called Bellwood, which is like
outside of Chicago. It's like a more black neighborhood than
I was living in at the previous to that, and
(21:55):
I would go outside and race cars. Like I would
sit like in front of my house and wait till
cars were passing, and then I would just run full
speed next to cars, being like, yeah, I'm a fucking
beat this car. And then at one point it was
like a weird hour of the day where I'm racing
a car and a dude yelled out, the fuck are
(22:16):
you doing it? I was like, I can't I guess
I ain't got no powers, and I don't think I'm
a race cars no more.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Cuz I took was one random outburst for you to
stop your dream.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
I was like, this ain't superpowers. This is this is accountability,
and I'm meeting it.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
I was afraid. I didn't think I could get a superpowers.
But I have a very specific reason. I was afraid
of electricity. I was a big latch key kid, right,
and if you were a latchkey kid, it was don't cook,
was like the big thing, right, do not cook. Don't
fucking cook. So mom was gone, I cook immediately because
(22:58):
we didn't have anything good in the house. Because after
school we didn't have anything good. I was like, I'm
gonna make a tuna fish sandwich. But I was like,
let me church this up a bit. You know, it's
you know, it's better than a tuna's fish sandwich, A
hot tune of melt right, So.
Speaker 3 (23:14):
I'm saying I'm saying it turned out smart.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
So I fucking I took the can off, I drained
the juice, and then I was like, I'll just throw
the can in the microwave. Oh no, Like, I just
throw the can in the microwave to heat it up right,
Oh god no, And I put it in there and
I'm sitting because I'm I could have been more than
eight or nine. I'm sitting about three inches away from
(23:42):
that bitch. And there was like four seconds and maybe
there was like a lightning bolt that went from the
top of the can to the side of the can
and it was like oh bright, and it hurt my
eyes and I backed up. And ever since then, I've
been so afraid of like I fucking because I thought
the whole house is going to bring down. And ever
she said, I've been so afraid of electricity.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
I've even say, you be afraid of tuna.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Like you know what, man, I've been nowhere near tuna
ever since. Get that album away from me.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
If anything, I doubled down.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
Anything that day or were you know, I just.
Speaker 1 (24:20):
Pulled it out and made it a cold tunis Oh man.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Not deter You're like, Okay, that's out.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
I'm just going yeah, you ate that radiated tuna. Yeah,
Jesus Christ.
Speaker 4 (24:32):
It wasn't like we had a bunch to just like
throw around, you know what I mean, I already had
a plan.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
You took a big swing. You could you could just
skip it.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Hilarious, man, man, I remember how I scared the ship
out of me.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
So you didn't get the lightning powers that you dreamt of.
You don't believe necessarily that that your mom was correcting
all of this. Where where do you stand now in
all of this? What are you telling your children? Your father?
What are you telling your children as it relates to
lightning and experimentation with forks and sockets and whatnot?
Speaker 1 (25:11):
You know what? I shoot, My kids are seventeen and fifteen.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I realized I've never had a conversation with them about
any of the safety of lightning period.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Man.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
I think also because like my their generation didn't grow
up outside as much as we did, so they're never
like I can't even say they've ever been outdoors in
a lightning storm, thunder lightning storm when they weren't like
in a car or something. Yeah, so I never had
to pass that along. It's so interesting how the thing
about parenthood that really messes with my mind is like
(25:42):
the money, but in addition to that, it's like, for
better for worse, you really are responsible for somebody's worldview,
like how they start off seeing the world then they
either have to accept that change it. Like my mom
was like, this is the thing about lightning, kids, you
know what I'm saying. And I had to reject that.
(26:03):
But at least she put us, you know, she puts
something out there. And I feel like that's the wildest
thing about parenthood is like, bro, I don't even know
what's happening in the world.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Dude, don't listen to me. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
I don't even know how good I'm doing it as
a parent. Just just I remember one time it was
really funny. I messed with my kids about this. We
had like a what does an animal sound?
Speaker 1 (26:22):
You know?
Speaker 2 (26:22):
We were doing that like it was like a little
picture boss. No, no, it was like a picture book.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
It was like cow ca.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
You're like teaching them and I would be like cow,
the cow says, move right. And I remember getting to
like giraffe and I was like, you know, the draft
does it make a sound that we noticed? And I
remember thinking, and I did this. I was like, I'm
gonna make up a draft now, and I hope my
kids go to school and fight to the nail because
(26:51):
they're gonna believe me. So I was like, and the
draft says, And I did that all the time. I
made up like alligators, any animal that didn't have a sound.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
For sure.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
I was just like and the crocodile says. And I
wanted them to just go to school or daycare and
be like, no, man, my dad said, and he's right.
He was running about cows. He was running about birds
and ducks.
Speaker 3 (27:19):
You know, say like, why would he lie tell me
that it couldn't possibly be because of his insecurity? Isn't
mean because he don't know nothing.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
As one member of this panel who's not a father,
I think you did the right thing. I believe I
want him to not respect you. Think you don't know
anything about nature. My dad doesn't even know what a
giraffe sounds like. He's supposed to keep me safe in
the world. You don't even know about a giraffe noise.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
If you want to run my household, you better know
what a giraffe.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Better make it up, man, until we see one and
we're proven otherwise. And I remember we went to the
zoo one time and they were like, they're not doing
the sound. I was like, man, they're maybe tired or something.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Oh'sick.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
This is just a problem with zoos sedate the animals.
They're not themselves here. We got to see the nature.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
When we go to Africa, these are in captivity. Man,
I don't even know this is true. But did y'all
watch Blackfish, the documentary about World. Oh yeah, so you know,
I went to see World all the time as a kid,
and I remember that. I remember the dorsal finn thing specifically,
it's like flapped over in SeaWorld and we were you know,
(28:35):
the kids always asked and they will say, oh, you know,
they made up something like, oh yeah, this happens a
lot with these type of whales. And then in Blackfish
they were like, that never happens. Ever, it only happened
that SeaWorld, being like, oh my god, I just I
believe these people because they work with the well, it
never crossed my mind that they could be its bias
(28:56):
and propaganda. It's big, big sea. World wants to frame
little children's behind and like that's what parents like, Like
somebody just says something and goes with it so confidently
you try to question him.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
Listen, kids, his dorsal fin has flipped that way because
he's having too much fun.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
He's doubled over.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
You ever had too many Skittles kids. That's what he
feels like.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
And we don't know enough to challenge them. Man, they
have to know them and be with them all day.
Speaker 3 (29:28):
I mean they were beating this ship out the whales,
honestly struggling to keep his fin up.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
I'm not pro that, but they did a good job
because SeaWorld was funny. Shit Broz to go manin the
Dolphins showed SeaWorld is one of the top five experiences
of my whole life.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
All right, guys, I shouldn't do this. I should not
do this. We're already having a great time. I watched
that documentary with my wife and I was like, if
I never knew this, I would never know this. So
we went to vacation in Florida, like I don't two
years ago and they were like, we got tickets to
Sea Worm, Man, we should go. And I was just like, yes,
(30:09):
I'm not gonna rob my children. At least a chance
to watch black Fish and know them. Lie. But they
gotta see a well do you have to? Man, I'm sorry,
see world is still open. The documentary didn't do enough damage.
Speaker 7 (30:22):
Man.
Speaker 2 (30:22):
People were like, oh, that's crazy, but it's still doing well.
Speaker 4 (30:26):
And you gotta know the steaks. You gotta know the
steaks you got. Then you gotta choose. You have to
know how much fun you had. But then you have
to be like, all right, now, I choose because otherwise
you never even got to have that fun.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
And that's probably my issue, is I've I've chosen not
to do it. But it's only because I've never tried
that sweet Sea World cocaine, you know what I mean,
Like I've never sweet gotten a taste.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
It's good.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
It seems like it's I feel so bad, but I'm like, man, man,
it is cool. Though I'm sorry, man, there's we just
gotta be honest with ourselves. Man, we are we are
not perfect people. We're flawed individuals. And I let capitalism
get the best of me. And I was all in
for like years when I saw that. It was like
(31:10):
years I didn't take my kids to see world. But
you know, I was weak in that moment and I
had We had the best time. It's amazing. It's amazing.
It's amazing. Maybe feel more guilty, like if it was terrible,
I have been like, man, this is man, I shouldn't
even but because it was so good, I was. I mean,
the food was good, the rides.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
We watched, the show, we ate, well, it was. It
was a hell of a time.
Speaker 4 (31:37):
But listen, here's what I argue. It's that not the
mark of a truly great father. You took the burden
of that on you, and you internalized it. You didn't
catch down generational blackfish trauma. You said, no, I'm gonna
let these little kids enjoy it. I know the evil
that works with them.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
That's nice.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
I'm a hero. Yeah, I don't think.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
I don't think our listeners are going to agree. But that's.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
All right.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
We have to take a break. We'll be back with
more Kevil on stage and more. My mama told me.
Speaker 7 (32:22):
It was due to a feces thrown all over the walls,
the floor, the ceiling, and a stunk.
Speaker 6 (32:29):
We are back with stage Michael Jackson. Of course it
was Michael was a real clip. Of course it was
a real clip.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
I've never heard that wasn't a or something already.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
If I'm not mistaken, it was something relating to the
Second Trial. I feel like it has something to do
with with the Second Trial, because that was the that
was the era. If we if I'm remembering correctly, where
Michael Jackson had linked up with Johnny cochrane and they
were sort of playing him heavy as a black artist
being mistreated.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Uh.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
They did the same OJ ship where they're like, this
is a racial issue, and I think it had something
to do with people like abusing him or mistreating him
and and like giving him a shitty booboo room.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
Or something like that. Play it one more time.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
I was hoping you would say that, yeah.
Speaker 7 (33:32):
There was doo dooo feces thrown all over the walls,
the floor of the ceiling in a stunk.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
That I've never heard.
Speaker 1 (33:45):
What I like.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
What I like most is that he says there was
doo dooo feces as if they are some sort of conjunction,
that it is a that to say one, you cannot
say one without the other. It was due do feis.
Speaker 4 (34:00):
I mean, I think there's levels and we can all
agree that sometimes you do these, sometimes you feces.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
I feel like it's only used in medical terms. But
it's so black that Michael Jackson says doodoo.
Speaker 3 (34:15):
Like, hey, he's a black man.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
I imagine him not in character like man, there's doodoo
everywhere and there man's going on Michael Jackson, Man, you'll
got doodoo, you got feces over here? Come on, you
sold eighty million albums? I do and fe You think
Prince got dooty owners?
Speaker 3 (34:37):
Wall on the fucking Beatles catalog? What is brong with y'all?
Speaker 2 (34:45):
I got a monkey, nigga monkey, don't no doodle? He
no better than don't do it at me. I wish
brothers one. Don't doodle at me. I kill him dead.
I don't you do like that?
Speaker 1 (34:58):
He ships in a toilet like an adult?
Speaker 3 (35:02):
What a while? We were talking about Sea World earlier.
What a wild time where we were just letting regular citizens'
own exotic animals take them to award shows.
Speaker 4 (35:12):
And it's such a dangerous practice because I grew up
thinking like I thought that as a kid, I was like, yeah,
I fucked around, I can get a monkey.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
That was my dream.
Speaker 3 (35:20):
I was gonna get a monkey, Yeah, one hundred percent.
I was going to get a spider monkey when I
grew up.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
See this is fucked up.
Speaker 4 (35:26):
In hindsight, I think I wanted a chimp, which is
the danger most one that kills you.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Yeah, yeah, I seen a chimp rip some dudes head.
He ripped the scalp Off. You seen it, not in
real life, it was it was on the internet. He
was like, you know those places, but we're gonna pet
the monkeys, and the monkey like grabbed his head and
just rip fuck and it was like white meat.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
And I was like, I'm not doing that no more.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
I used to want to go to Thailand and do that,
and now I'm like, I'm unaware of monkey strength. And
I've seen Planet of the Apes, but I ain't seen
head to the white meat and one fell swoop.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
Yeah, And I mean because Plant of the Apes is
more about their mental strength. Yeah, Physically that's a worthy opponent.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
They're formidable in many ways.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
This is great. It's a good time perform It's like,
can you imagine somebody hopping into this podcast at this
moment in here? You know, physically they're a formative poet
Jim bar anyway.
Speaker 3 (36:25):
And then they get off and they're like, what is
that podcast about? It like black conspiracy theories. I think
it's black people in conspiracy theories, but sometimes they talk
about strong ass monkeys.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
And Michael Jackson saying Dodo, man, it all makes sense
if you heard the whole episode. You can't skip around
you gotta from around.
Speaker 3 (36:46):
Enjoy the thing.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
No, you gotta buckle, and we're not a dalliance.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Yeah, keV, I did some research on your conspiracy theory
that I would love to unpack with you. I went
to the National Weather Service website to review some of
the songs admits about lightning, and they do feel a
lot of weird questions, including if crouching down or lying
(37:11):
down in the center of a field during a storm
will keep you safe. Uh, And I assure you all
it does not. It in fact, just makes you dumb
and looks silly. They said, lying down especially is dangerous
because if lightning strikes nearby, the electric current that moves
through the ground, it's just like has a better chance
(37:33):
of spreading through your whole body.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
Oh that's dope, I have some more to be scared of.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
That's good, that's what.
Speaker 3 (37:39):
Yeah, So don't lie down.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Thinking up that's a good question.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
That is a good question.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
You're weighing like I'm jumping, so I'm closer to the lightning.
But if it misses me and hits the ground, I'm
not part of the conducted electricity.
Speaker 1 (37:54):
It wasn't.
Speaker 3 (37:55):
It wasn't in their questions, but I'm happy to submit
that one. Afterwards, I'll also submit can you pray the
lightning away? Let's let's just hit all the silliest ones.
We confirmed.
Speaker 2 (38:07):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (38:09):
One of the things that they say, though, is that
it is dangerous to be outside in all circumstances during
a lightning storm. However, they say the closest thing to
a safe alternative we have is being in your actual house.
So you were already doing the right thing by being
in a home with all of your electricity turned off.
And they say that the only time that it actually
(38:31):
is dangerous in your house of being struck by lightning
is if you.
Speaker 2 (38:35):
Are around the electric slide.
Speaker 3 (38:38):
Yeah, if you're doing the electric slide.
Speaker 2 (38:41):
Especially the part where we go like that, that's the production,
that's the conduction.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
If you strike while it's striking, that's a man.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
You're done. You are calling for lightning if you're doing that.
Speaker 4 (38:55):
That's what it started out. It was a Native American
lightning dance. We co opted it.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
A lot of people don't know.
Speaker 3 (39:02):
You can't see it. It's electric. But they say that
the one time that it is dangerous is that if
you are around something that conducts electricity. So they ask
you to avoid corded phones if you're still doing that shit,
electrical appliances, wires, TV cables, computers, plumbing, metal doors and windows.
(39:27):
No mention of silver shredder toys on the list.
Speaker 4 (39:31):
Here's a question that I have immediately. This is where
my closed Yep, you say plumbing. Now, let's say I
am taking one of the aforementioned dodoos.
Speaker 3 (39:43):
One of one of Michael's infamous dodoos.
Speaker 4 (39:47):
And I'm steepling now, so you understand that I'm being
very serious. Yeah, is there a possibility of lightning striking
my booty?
Speaker 1 (39:55):
Hoole.
Speaker 3 (39:57):
I'm gonna go so far as to say the boot
is not the threat. There there are stories of people
being in lightning strikes while taking showers. It seems like
showers are more of a threat than lightning shooting up
the toilet into your booty hole.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
It's got a scoops out hugs the sides of the bull.
Speaker 3 (40:27):
If you do it right, the doo move out the way.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
Yeah, I have a lot of iron.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
It does sound though, like if I were using a
process of elimination, which I imagine your mother may have
been doing at the time, that maybe if you turned
out all the lights, and you've turned out all the
things that in theory conduct electricity, and you additionally had
to consider other things that might be a threat to
your child. Something shimmery and or silver would fall into
(41:02):
like a safer category. Then let's say trench coat, Raphael,
you know what I mean, like Native American, Michaelangelo, whatever
the other alternatives you had in your house. One of
the other things that I wanted to look up, and
this was pretty exciting, actually, is that apparently I wanted
to look up weird stories or insane stories of lightning strikes,
(41:24):
and there are some pretty weird ones. And apparently the
person who has been struck the most by lightning is
a man named Roy Cleveland Sullivan who worked as a
park ranger in Shenanandoah Shenandoah Shenandoah Okay hell Yeah National
Park in Virginia between nineteen forty two and nineteen seventy seven,
and he claims to have been struck by lightning. Hold
(41:47):
for the drum roll seven times. Seven times he was
struck by lightning and survived all of them. I'm seeing
some skepticism on your faces.
Speaker 4 (42:02):
Well, I first of all want to make light of
the fact that you thought it might be doing.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
He just announced it twice. Shut a door. If you
haven't corrected him, he might They're still telling how many
different ways he could have went with that fellas.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
I was gonna keep making noises till I till I
made it feel right.
Speaker 1 (42:27):
A rookie outside linebacker.
Speaker 3 (42:34):
Just a nice simoen man who moved to the stage
to play football man.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
But seven times that's document who was there.
Speaker 3 (42:44):
So that's the thing.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
It's rare.
Speaker 3 (42:46):
I think that lightning strikes and there's just somebody there
being like, whoa, you got a short by lightning.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
They're just like, this is crazy, Roy, you are on
a roll, my man, I gotta flip to the next day.
Speaker 1 (43:00):
Child.
Speaker 3 (43:03):
He did have a number of sort of like artifacts
to sort of demonstrate or like things that that he
had to show for it. Like twice I think he
got struck on the top of his head and it
like singed the middle of his his ranger hat and
basically burned a hole in the middle and at one
point lit his.
Speaker 1 (43:24):
Hair on fire.
Speaker 3 (43:25):
So all of that stuff is documented, and I don't
know that he did that independently, you know what I mean.
I don't think that he was just like fucking around
and lighting his hair on fire on his own, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (43:36):
So this leads to my next question.
Speaker 4 (43:38):
How much silver did my man have on him?
Speaker 1 (43:43):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (43:43):
He was drippy flying toys. We need to find out
if he was an avid shredder collector. Yeah, and he's
just like, under no circumstances ever, even in the house
without these, I don't care how many times I would
rather die.
Speaker 3 (43:58):
I don't give both.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
Well, my mom says, he's like I got six times.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
It's not gonna happen again.
Speaker 3 (44:07):
It's only making super Shredders. It's only making super Shredders.
Speaker 1 (44:15):
How old was he? How is he dead?
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Now?
Speaker 3 (44:18):
He has to be dead. He was born in like
nineteen thirteen or some shit like that. And was he
Did he die of lightning complications? I don't think so.
I think he lived a pretty regular life, it seems.
This is what makes it even crazier is that it
doesn't even feel like he got messed up that bad
from his lightning strikes, like it his legs. I didn't
(44:38):
look all that up.
Speaker 1 (44:39):
You get hit by lightning you're not does not work.
Speaker 3 (44:43):
Oh yeah, I didn't think about that.
Speaker 2 (44:46):
That's the first thing I thought.
Speaker 4 (44:53):
If that goes, there's no way you're gonna make a regular.
Speaker 2 (44:57):
His kid better be fast as fucked right. His baby's
raiding lighting seven times. You are making electronic children.
Speaker 3 (45:05):
Yeah, and when you come it says finish him, and
then then rating comes out. That's not my best joke,
but I got something.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
I got It was solid.
Speaker 3 (45:21):
I also read about one of the oldest and worst
lightning strikes ever recorded, happening in a town called Brescia, Italy.
Does anybody have a correction for Brescia Breccia? I don't
know how to power?
Speaker 1 (45:36):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (45:36):
Tittysville, Italy. In seventeen sixty nine, a church was being
used as a battery to store approximately one hundred tons
of gunpowder. The church took a direct hit of lightning,
and all the gunpowder eventually caught fire and exploded. After
all the dust settled, nearly a sixth of the city
(45:57):
was destroyed and killed nearly three thousand people.
Speaker 2 (46:00):
Oh my god, wow, I started laughingly.
Speaker 3 (46:04):
Yeah, sorry, fellas, Sorry, this can't all be fun in games.
Three thousand dead Italians from the seventeen.
Speaker 9 (46:12):
Hundreds sounds like a shudder job to me. No, I
wish you would get sorry. I laughed too early. You
could not have anticipated. That's how that story ended.
Speaker 2 (46:28):
Man having such a good time.
Speaker 3 (46:31):
Oh okay, I'll tell you one more example, and this
one actually is pretty fun. This one doesn't get sad.
But I found a part of the National Weather Service
website that is self submitted, like lists of recent survivors
of lightning strikes. Like people can type in right in
there and be like, I survived and this is what happened,
(46:51):
blah blah blah. And most of the injuries that they
report are like, it's it ranges, it's the full gamut.
They they chronic pain, lost, coma's depression, ears, ringing, muscle funk,
loss of muscle function, all of that shit. But there
was one person on this list, a woman named Missy,
who claimed to have gotten extrasensory perception ESP from her
(47:15):
encounter with lightning.
Speaker 4 (47:17):
So okay, and some of our listens, I know, but
some of our listeners maybe don't fully understand ESP. Yeah,
as an actual like that guy Cruskin invented it, right,
I don't know much about I.
Speaker 1 (47:32):
Well, it's me, it's me. I don't know what it is.
I don't know what it fuck?
Speaker 3 (47:35):
It is like, no, listen, I'm glad you're asking that.
And in fact, I tracked down the email that she sent. Oh,
and I can read it to you all now. The
subject line is high price for pizza question mark, supernatural
side effect question mark, And she says, I was struck
by lightning about twelve years ago. No one ever told
(47:56):
me that you weren't supposed to be on a landline
telephone during an electrical storm. So there I was.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
Say it again, she didn't have a black mom, now black.
Speaker 3 (48:04):
Mama, nobody supposed to be here.
Speaker 2 (48:13):
Well, fuck.
Speaker 1 (48:17):
That one didn't even make that much sense.
Speaker 2 (48:18):
I was. It just felt boy, what you know what,
I don't mind it.
Speaker 4 (48:22):
Yeah, sometimes it's just sometimes it's magic, it's not science.
Speaker 3 (48:28):
She says. So there I was calling in a carry
out pizza order when I noticed that the lightning and
thunder was getting more intense and coming more frequently. I
heard static on the phone line, which kept getting louder
and louder. Then I heard what sounded like a loud explosion,
and at the same time I noticed a bright white
light at my feet, which was football shaped and had spikes.
(48:51):
It blew me across the floor, and I was knocked
out for a few seconds. My son came running into
the kitchen to find me laying there on the floor.
When I started to get a numbing feeling on one
side of my body, starting at the toes and working upward,
he called nine one one. After spending several hours in
the emergency room, they confirmed that I had been hit
by lightning. Through the phone lines after the strike, I
(49:13):
noticed a strange side effect. It's almost as if I
got esp extrasensory perception. Every once in a while, there
have been times where I speak to someone, speak someone's name,
someone that I haven't been heard from or seen in
many years, and all of a sudden they walk in
the door. Or time, I knew my plumbing was going
(49:34):
to be back up in the laundry, and sure enough,
that night it happened. I've had eerie feelings about this
just before they've actually happened. I've actually created a list
somewhere in my house of these incidents because I couldn't
believe it myself. Most people that know me are made,
and so am I. This periodic thing only started after
(49:55):
my lightning incident. Wow, how bought in?
Speaker 1 (50:00):
Are well? Not at all? No, No, I don't. I don't.
I don't, I don't.
Speaker 2 (50:06):
Maybe I'm just the cynic in my old About three
sentences in, I was like girl, and that.
Speaker 4 (50:14):
Was like, Oh, you knew the laundry was gonna back
up because this ship's been rattling for six months.
Speaker 1 (50:22):
Fucking call your landlord. What are you talking about?
Speaker 3 (50:24):
They're not great examples. She's not damling it with the
examples for esp.
Speaker 2 (50:29):
Oh, not at all. He was like, Yeah, if that
was Shark Tank, I'd be like, I'm out for don't
door for this reason, I don't believe you.
Speaker 1 (50:37):
For this reason, I'm out. I'd be like, I actually
have a lot of friends in the laundry space. It is.
Speaker 3 (50:47):
It is a wild choice to be like, no, I
did get superpowers, and what is my power? I can
tell when my laundry room is gonna it's gonna stop
working the way it's supposed to.
Speaker 1 (50:58):
Yeah, that's just bot.
Speaker 3 (51:00):
You wasted your powers?
Speaker 1 (51:02):
Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (51:04):
And did they get that pizza for free? I don't
think so. I don't think the pizza got delivered. It
sounds like she had a rough night without pizza. And also, uh,
shitty superpowers damn.
Speaker 1 (51:16):
Yeah, you know you lose something exactly.
Speaker 3 (51:20):
I think if we if we can all agree, it
seems as if we we we are all sort of
certain that shredder toys are in no way a threat
in a lightning storm, and unfortunately, superpowers are not easily achieved,
even for those who are struck by lightning. It requires
a more miraculous interaction with chemicals and a body to
(51:43):
truly turn you supernatural.
Speaker 1 (51:46):
Yeah. Absolutely, Yeah, I think that's.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Damn well, keV. I think we did it. I think
this is I think this is a whole shebang.
Speaker 2 (51:55):
This is perfect.
Speaker 1 (51:56):
Man.
Speaker 2 (51:56):
I still got time to go to my son's soccer game.
This is great timing. I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (52:00):
Yeah, you're doing it.
Speaker 3 (52:01):
Do you want to tell the people where they can
find you and what cool shit you have going on? Okay,
hell yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2 (52:12):
You know, if they're curious enough that I should be
easy enough to fight.
Speaker 4 (52:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (52:16):
Yeah, And that's not saying it's just.
Speaker 3 (52:18):
Like, no, you go viral often enough that I think
they'll bump into you.
Speaker 2 (52:24):
That's fair to say. Come see about it, Kevi on stage.
Just search that wherever you're looking, you'll probably find me.
Speaker 3 (52:30):
Well not us. We still plug Bory what you got.
Speaker 4 (52:33):
I want to be at the Comedy Bar in Seattle,
Washing gym and on the twenty seven to twenty eighth,
and I desperately need you to buy tickets. Go on
my Instagram Cool Guy Jokes eighty seven and all my
links are there. I got some other dates coming up,
but that's what I got right now.
Speaker 3 (52:51):
Yeah, and as always, you can follow me at Langston Kerman.
I don't have dates just yet to tell you about,
but they're coming. And if you want to us your
own conspiracy theories, if you want to send us your
own drops, if you want to tell us how you
achieved your superpower, send it all to my mama pod
at gmail dot com. We would love to hear from you.
(53:11):
Go to my mama told me dot Merch Central to
buy some of the merch that we have cooking. They
are moving to them, shirts and hats, they're moving fast.
We want y'all to have them. So go there and
like subscribe, do whatever bullshit you're supposed to do to
keep the podcast afloat. We love it, we need it,
We love you. That's the whole thing. By bitch, Look
(53:34):
if you hate cops just because of co Next time
you get in trouble, call.
Speaker 2 (53:39):
The crackhead.
Speaker 5 (53:47):
My crow chips in your naies.
Speaker 2 (53:50):
All Kuala Bears are racist, The host layers money and
turning stuff from cans opinting at
Trench coat. Roth was crazy. He just looked like a
sex offender. Oh yeah, as we grew up and the
world he made less.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
As a child, we didn't have enough frame of reference,
But as we grew we're like, you know, I wish
they'd stopped doing that. But yeah, And also, do you
think you saw a human olid turtle in a trench coat.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
You'd be like, man, that guy was weird.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
But oh well, and you're just going about your day
like it's not gonna happen.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Man, put some shoes on, you know what I'm saying.
That'd be great.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
There's like a lot of other moves you can Sorry,
you could do pants. Pants would be nice, were great.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
You have webbed feet.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
You got to like, come on, cause even if he
didn't have pants on, then it's like, Okay, this dude's
in a trench coat and nepads.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
That's already a problem.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
You got a big problem on it.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
That's already I'm thinking the.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Green legs, yelds are green, I see all that. Come on.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
The Fedora doesn't class it up enough, no, not to
notice green legs and knee.
Speaker 4 (01:01):
Pads and he's stinking like pizza.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Giant red flag.
Speaker 5 (01:08):
Yah, chips in yours a racist the.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Money turny stuff.
Speaker 4 (01:29):
I can't tell me as long as you know I
can have any man I want to. Baby, that's actual
and factual. Welcome back to another episode of My Mama
Told Me.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
The podcast where we dived deep, deep into the pockets
of black conspiracy theories.
Speaker 4 (01:50):
And we finally worked to prove that Shatasha Williams is
not just the long gone forgotten singer of the hook
of Thuggish Ruggish Bone, is in fact a founding member
of the group. They were the Bone Thugs and she
was the Harmony. Whoa that we didn't we I got you, Shatasha, Baby,
(02:11):
keep your head up.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
My name is David Bord. I'm lazy Germy. Now I
guess this already. He's already feeling it.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
I get people don't talk enough about Aunt Tasha. She said,
an Tasha, come on, and we ford about her, and
then we they said in the name Bone Thugs and Harmony.
We know they weren't singing, come on, justin Pasha. Thank you?
Bory Can I call you by?
Speaker 6 (02:35):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:35):
We just thought that's I prefer it, Bory Man. You
and you're protecting black women by not forgetting what their
accomplishments for what they did.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Man, that's what I'm talking about. Come on, sang all
of their names at the end of that song.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Listen in the house.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
The knee bone is connected to the girl bone, and
we forgot we forgot that part of the song. Oh man,
that's intense. That's damn. Do you think you think they're
ever sitting back and being like, damn, we really we
owe her something, We really fucked her over it.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
I feel like they must know because I have done
a deep bone dive, as we all have adults here.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Sure, if this were Cameron's podcast, we would have had
to pause you pretty hard there.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
But but this ain't that podcast. Pauses there we go gas,
no breaks, some good. That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 4 (03:29):
I just like I just talk, and sometimes it's it's
sometimes I talk about mouth meat stuff and it means
whatever you need it to mean.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
You gotta put that on your website.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Sometimes I talk.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
About mouth meat stuff that feels like a little bit
of a signature detail about you.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I wouldn't say it's I don't need to celebrate, It's
just you know.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
How we are excited. You've already heard his voice. Our
guest today. We've we've been trying to get him on
for a long time and it's finally happening. And he's
so funny and we're so grateful that he's here. He's
a comedian, a producer, a content creator, a person of
(04:11):
extraordinary breath and talents. He's wonderful, he's funny. You're gonna
love him. Please give it up for our guests. Mister
Kevi on stage, everybody, Man, there we go.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Nice. I got a few in there, I got a
few in the.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Thanks you guys for having me on the show man.
I'm excited to be here, man. This is this is
the way to kick off the year. You know, Hollywood.
We really just started working today for real, Yo, this
is like it feels like the first day back at school.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
And I'm glad to be doing this with y'all.
Speaker 6 (04:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
No, we're happier here. I was at my manager's office
this morning and they said something similar to that, and
I got real mad. I was like, y'all, niggas, what
I didn't work for nine months, bitch, what you mean
you just getting started today?
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Take the first off. There's work to be done.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Yeah, what the fuck are you talking about? Get your
bad ass back in the office and make some calls
that aren't going to turn into anything. But call them anyway.
Speaker 4 (05:16):
I'm trying to read for the in the House reboot.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
And just lie to me. At least tell me I
made some calls. They pad tell me something.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
That's all. That's all I'm asking for is give me.
Make me believe you. Try do that thing where a
car is coming and we trot across the street and
we're not going any faster than when we be walking.
But but trot. Show me the trot job.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
Man, that's a big that's a big way that I
show people how I care about them. Yeah, the little
trot I just picked the shoulders up. The feet does
not change.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
The feet doesn't change at all.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
But give your mind.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
That's all we're looking ass for.
Speaker 3 (06:02):
That's how you're getting asked for it.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
keV.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
You came to us with the conspiracy theory that uh
that I don't think I had ever heard before.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Bory, where do you I've heard this before?
Speaker 3 (06:15):
You have heard this? That's okay, great, So so I'm
the only idiot here. But you said, my mama told.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Me never played with silver toys when there's lightning outside
or you will be struck down exactly. So you know,
growing up as we probably did, we're in the same generation.
You know, action figures were a big part of our life.
(06:42):
Ye I'm saying. We didn't have We didn't have iPads
and stuff like that. We had cartoon we played outside,
we had action figures. So at the time that I
that I learned of this conspiracy theory, I had a Shredder,
which was my prize villain. I was a big Turtles fan,
you know, I had. I had a couple of legit
Turtles and I ain't always get the actual toys. I
got versions of them, you know, like you know, like
(07:05):
I remember one year asked my dad for the Batman
coop with with you know what I'm saying, And it
came with Batman, and he just got me the coop.
It was in the box and the Batman was gone,
and I was like, what happened to the Batman? He
was like a kid in Africa. We wouldn't have nothing.
I was like, but he didn't just buy like a
coop Batman came in that box. Somebody had opened it
(07:27):
and taken the Batman out. And then somehow my dad
just got came in the possession of the coop, but
I was I have nobody to put in the in
the coop, so I just had a random g I
Joe man in the coop. It just didn't hit the same.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
He was just hanging out in the back of it.
Came out and being like, y'all ain't about to throw
this away, right, That's good because I know a boy
who might like this quite a bit.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
The Salvation Army, Christmas gifts, you know whatever it was.
So he gave me like half of what I wanted.
But at this time I had, you know, I had
mostly off brand men.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
We called him men. I had mostly off brand men.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Just just.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Legally you had to call them men, not a figure.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
And saw that toys or rust are KB toys. They
saw that place that don't even sell toys. You know
what I'm saying, Oh yeah, swap the g I Jojo
g I exactly. They adjason right. So but this time
I had actually, if I think for like a birthday,
I had like four of the actual turtles and an
actual shredder. So these were like the Krim Dela Crim
(08:26):
of my toys. I play with them every day. So
I'm playing with them. You know what I'm saying, it's
a lightning storm and the power is out. So I'm
really like, oh, this is you know what I'm saying.
I'm playing with these actual figures.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
So my mom comes in and I got Shredder in
my right hand. Never I don't know why this is
such a vivid memory, Maybe because I was so confused
by what she was saying.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
And she was like, she's like, what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Boy? But put that down. You know you can't play
with no silver toy. You're gonna get struck down by lightning.
And I looked at the shredder and I'm like, this
is plastic. First of all, this is not And I
was not, like I've always been kind of a smart person.
I'm in my hand. I was young enough to know
that this cannot cannot conduct electricity at all? There is
(09:11):
and his shredder stuff was coming off right, you know what,
sing I played with the toy for real. It was
like brown. You know what I'm saying, It's like the
color of the skin under there.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
You get you get shredder in the bathtub one too
many times and that ain't shredder no more.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
It was just they were putting a lot of you know,
high quality stuff into these.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Man that's just a Japanese man in football year that ain't.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Yeah, yeah, wow, I did not know that.
Speaker 7 (09:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And the lore. I think there's a lot of lore
in Ninja Turtles about where Shredder and Splinter come from,
some of which suggests that they are connected directly, in
some of which they didn't know each other at all,
but always Shredder was like a big mob guy in
Japan that then finds its way in to uh, New York.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Somehow or something. I thought he was Italian for some reason.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
I'm gonna get you Turtles.
Speaker 4 (10:11):
That.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Look, do you guys have accents on your resume? Do
you have Italire accent proficient? Because if you don't have it,
you need to add it. Oh no, no, no, I
in the house. So yeah. So she was like, you know,
she wasn't fussy. She was just genuinely concerned, like put
(10:33):
this and I'm like, I'm inside the house. The windows
are closed. I was literally I didn't say any of
this because she's the black.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Mom like you're saying.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
But in my head, I'm like, how is lightning gonna
come through the world avoid all the objects outside that
are actual silver catalytic converters, everything that's in the world.
Go through my closed window and see this plastic shredder
in my hand and strike me with lightning. Like I
(11:02):
just was like, there's no way this could be true.
But I put it down. I picked up like rock
steady and bebop.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
She was like, all, I know that. You know.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
Those are purple.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
You know those a decent lightning fearing man. Go ahead,
enjoy yourself in the dark.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
But I just like, b I remember, I never bought
into it, like I don't have foil, I don't have
a fork. This is a plastic man with more plastic
that is just colored to look like silver.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
I can't die. And I never heard no other parents
say that. That was the first. It's actually interesting that
Bory had heard that because I wasn't like at the
other friend's house and they were like, man, you know
what I'm saying. Mone was on that, Like, I never
heard that before or from anybody else. But it's good
to know that that it's not that unusual.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
I've heard it just with metal in general, silver and specific.
I had just heard it in metal, don't be fucking around.
Oh got it, Yeah, lightning outside.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
I think that's what I had heard as well, is like,
you can't like be running around with forks when you
when it's lightning outside.
Speaker 4 (12:04):
Because to be completely honest, I don't have any silver
in the house now, I'm thirty six years old, Like
I don't.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Have We got to get you some silver.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Oh, you're not so much silverer right now. You got
so much silver, you.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Got somebody you gotta have silver.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
In your house.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
You I don't believe you.
Speaker 3 (12:24):
No, I don't have an ounce of silver exactly. Trust Yeah,
you're going crazy, you're doing it.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
I had always heard metal, like avoid obviously metal objects
holding metal during lightning scums. I had never heard silver specifically,
and I certainly had never then spread that out to
even silver appearing objects. Do you think that silver there
was a specific reasoning for silver for your mom.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
You know, it's funny that don't make sense. I feel
like maybe through the grape vine somebody said metal when
she just was like, silver's metal. I'm just gonna take
the metal part out on the silver because I've never
questioned that part until today. Metal. I would have believed
her even and the thing I think it was messed
with me is the toy was plastic. So I was
(13:19):
just like, this doesn't make any sense. But you know,
how do black parents learn anything? Right? Like, I'm the
Internet's really interesting because I'm realizing, like there's this meme
that goes vie everyone to the while. It's like if
you had this cover you was black, and it's like
a blanket I recognize, And I'm like, how did so
many black Where was this manufactured? Like so, I feel
(13:40):
like that information came through like that, like the way
those cookies became tens for like so and like who
makes Who's the first person that does that? Why do
we black people so many of us have that shared
experience that you know, there's no cookies in the cookie team,
but there's like soeing equipment or whatever. But I think
it was one of those things, Like I don't know
(14:00):
how this information got around, but.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
It does speak to the fact that, like to some extent,
the black community that we refer to did exist in
a much more active way when we were kids and
obviously when our parents were kids and all of that shit,
in part because they were all learning from the same
six like templates of people where it's like everybody just
(14:26):
learned the same six things, so we are in fact
a community, and now the Internet sort of disrupts the
ability for that to even be true anything, you know
what I mean?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
I feel like a lot of my life I've got,
I've taken so much word is back from just like
a dude sitting on the hood of a car.
Speaker 3 (14:45):
Yeah, it has a car.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
I guess the confidence is key man man.
Speaker 7 (14:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
I remember my mom once told me that, uh, that
Aretha Franklin's son had run off with what his name,
that he was the army dude in fucking different world.
And I can't remember his fucking name now, but he's
a very fantastic actor.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
Louis James.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Yeah, yes, mister.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Goddamn, I'm gonna be dude.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Yeah, he was in Fargo season five. Glenn Turman, Yes,
Glynn Turman. My mom told me for years that Glenn
Turman had had like a secret affair with Aretha franklin son.
They had run off together, and and that was why
her and Glenn Turman didn't make it and all this
ship and I've never even looked up to verify if
(15:40):
there's any truth to that, and I've never heard anyone
else make that claim.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
It was just my mom saying it, did you come home?
Speaker 4 (15:47):
We believed everybody was related. We were one of those
like take Ali was for sure, Mouhammed Ali's daughter. What
I quoted that too recently?
Speaker 3 (16:01):
Yeah, And they look it up and you're like, oh, no,
I don't think so.
Speaker 4 (16:04):
I think it's because I was like, well, there's not
that many famous black people.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
They must be relating.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Half down the line. I got to connect someone at
some point. There's a lot of Smith's, a lot of Jackson.
Is that crazy?
Speaker 1 (16:20):
Oh my god?
Speaker 3 (16:21):
So so your mom says this to you, You agree
to disagree, but you put down the shredder. Have you
carried any of this onward in your life? Have you
since been like weirdly superstitious or nervous around silver objects
in a lightning storm despite what you know logically to
(16:42):
be untrue inside of this.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
No, absolutely not.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
I think, as hard as it is to admit, I
didn't believe my mom. I just could not defy her.
And I think those are two separate things. Oh, in
my mind, I was just like, this is just not true.
But you know, small black children didn't really have a voice.
Growing up the way we we did, we really couldn't
(17:05):
question our parents. But I remember being like, this is
just not true. And if she weren't here, I would
be playing with this, and if I got struck by lightning,
I would have been really surprised like that.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
It's crazy. Let me tell you, as.
Speaker 4 (17:17):
Far as my family, large black men don't have much
of a voice. I'm still not pushing the line on things.
She says, Really, she's listening, she had a heart, she's
from a different country.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
I just, yeah, I don't know. Maybe that's maybe they
are sneaky. I don't.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Oh my god, my mom just tried to FaceTime me.
That's you fucked up on it, bro on it.
Speaker 3 (17:49):
Baby girl figured out how to get a feed and
she's she's listening to her exactly what you said.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yeah, she's listening. I'll call you back on I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (18:07):
I have a question for you guys, yes, specifically to
this because this because this one is big for me.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
How afraid of electricity were you as a child? Though?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Oh man, I have a funny story about this that
I haven't thought about in a long time. I was
a bright kid, but also not the brightest at all.
So upon learning about conducting electricity and metal and stuff
and how you shouldn't put forks in sockets, I went
home immediately one day and was like, nah, ain't no way.
(18:38):
And I promise y'all, as God is my witness, this
happened for real. Oh no, went home for school that day.
Take a fork, mediate sock, go to my room, close
hers socket.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
That.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
I love that. First of all, I love that you
needed privacy for.
Speaker 8 (18:53):
The he turned the lights down, candle, put that little
rolls on that they were talking about earlier.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
And now it's forking socket time.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Com please.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
You'll never find a fork like.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
So yeah, close the door, take this fork immediately, go
to the socket and no, no, no condom, no foreplay
jam it in on the socket, right, and I promise you.
I saw a bubble like I got shocked immediately, and
I saw what felt like a bubble the size of
(19:41):
like you remember those little like twenty five things you
buy a toy, you take them, so probably like half
of that.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Bubble go up my forearm. Oh no, all the way
up here.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Immediately I knew I was a superhero. I he said that.
I was like, oh my god, this is my because
you know, we watching X Men and Spider Man, they
all have that like event. And I spent the rest
of the day trying to, like, you know, kind of
like a Toby Maguire Spider Man like. I was like,
(20:18):
how do I get the electricity? I don't realize I
nearly probably killed myself.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
I am like, you're like, no, I know it's in me.
I just know how to.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
Active figured out how to activate this electric like I
should be flying, the electron should be flowing through me.
I'm a science experiment now, my hero or villain, it depends.
I don't know, it's too early to tell. The first
thing I gotta do is get these powers under control.
Spent like the whole afternoon doing that, and initially I
just was like, man, I'm kind of hungry, and I
(20:49):
made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and never revisited
that moment.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
First of all, I'm sorry that that happened to you.
I was hopeful too. I was hopeful that that story
ended with you having electric powers.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
No, it feels like an origin story for sure.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
Yeah, I was right there, man, the Spider bit me.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
I fell into the vat of science liquid and I
just no powers.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Man.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Yeah you did all right, though it's you did alright
for yourself. I too as a child, I wasn't as
afraid of it as much as I wanted to be
able to access some powers. And so many of like
great superheroes tend to come from like weird accidents like that. Yeah,
Like the Flash was my favorite growing up, Like I
(21:34):
wanted to be the Yeah. I was like, I'm a
run fast and so there would be times I wasn't
brave enough to stick a fork in a socket. But
there were times, and I remember this specifically, where like
we moved to this neighborhood called Bellwood, which is like
outside of Chicago. It's like a more black neighborhood than
I was living in at the previous to that, and
(21:55):
I would go outside and race cars. Like I would
sit like in front of my house and wait till
cars were passing, and then I would just run full
speed next to cars, being like, yeah, I'm a fucking
beat this car. And then at one point it was
like a weird hour of the day where I'm racing
a car and a dude yelled out, the fuck are
(22:16):
you doing it? I was like, I can't I guess
I ain't got no powers, and I don't think I'm
a race cars no more.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Cuz I took was one random outburst for you to
stop your dream.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
I was like, this ain't superpowers. This is this is accountability,
and I'm meeting it.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
I was afraid. I didn't think I could get a superpowers.
But I have a very specific reason. I was afraid
of electricity. I was a big latch key kid, right,
and if you were a latchkey kid, it was don't cook,
was like the big thing, right, do not cook. Don't
fucking cook. So mom was gone, I cook immediately because
(22:58):
we didn't have anything good in the house. Because after
school we didn't have anything good. I was like, I'm
gonna make a tuna fish sandwich. But I was like,
let me church this up a bit. You know, it's
you know, it's better than a tuna's fish sandwich, A
hot tune of melt right, So.
Speaker 3 (23:14):
I'm saying I'm saying it turned out smart.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
So I fucking I took the can off, I drained
the juice, and then I was like, I'll just throw
the can in the microwave. Oh no, Like, I just
throw the can in the microwave to heat it up right,
Oh god no, And I put it in there and
I'm sitting because I'm I could have been more than
eight or nine. I'm sitting about three inches away from
(23:42):
that bitch. And there was like four seconds and maybe
there was like a lightning bolt that went from the
top of the can to the side of the can
and it was like oh bright, and it hurt my
eyes and I backed up. And ever since then, I've
been so afraid of like I fucking because I thought
the whole house is going to bring down. And ever
she said, I've been so afraid of electricity.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
I've even say, you be afraid of tuna.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Like you know what, man, I've been nowhere near tuna
ever since. Get that album away from me.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
If anything, I doubled down.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
Anything that day or were you know, I just.
Speaker 1 (24:20):
Pulled it out and made it a cold tunis Oh man.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Not deter You're like, Okay, that's out.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
I'm just going yeah, you ate that radiated tuna. Yeah,
Jesus Christ.
Speaker 4 (24:32):
It wasn't like we had a bunch to just like
throw around, you know what I mean, I already had
a plan.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
You took a big swing. You could you could just
skip it.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Hilarious, man, man, I remember how I scared the ship
out of me.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
So you didn't get the lightning powers that you dreamt of.
You don't believe necessarily that that your mom was correcting
all of this. Where where do you stand now in
all of this? What are you telling your children? Your father?
What are you telling your children as it relates to
lightning and experimentation with forks and sockets and whatnot?
Speaker 1 (25:11):
You know what? I shoot, My kids are seventeen and fifteen.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I realized I've never had a conversation with them about
any of the safety of lightning period.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Man.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
I think also because like my their generation didn't grow
up outside as much as we did, so they're never
like I can't even say they've ever been outdoors in
a lightning storm, thunder lightning storm when they weren't like
in a car or something. Yeah, so I never had
to pass that along. It's so interesting how the thing
about parenthood that really messes with my mind is like
(25:42):
the money, but in addition to that, it's like, for
better for worse, you really are responsible for somebody's worldview,
like how they start off seeing the world then they
either have to accept that change it. Like my mom
was like, this is the thing about lightning, kids, you
know what I'm saying. And I had to reject that.
(26:03):
But at least she put us, you know, she puts
something out there. And I feel like that's the wildest
thing about parenthood is like, bro, I don't even know
what's happening in the world.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Dude, don't listen to me. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
I don't even know how good I'm doing it as
a parent. Just just I remember one time it was
really funny. I messed with my kids about this. We
had like a what does an animal sound?
Speaker 1 (26:22):
You know?
Speaker 2 (26:22):
We were doing that like it was like a little
picture boss. No, no, it was like a picture book.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
It was like cow ca.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
You're like teaching them and I would be like cow,
the cow says, move right. And I remember getting to
like giraffe and I was like, you know, the draft
does it make a sound that we noticed? And I
remember thinking, and I did this. I was like, I'm
gonna make up a draft now, and I hope my
kids go to school and fight to the nail because
(26:51):
they're gonna believe me. So I was like, and the
draft says, And I did that all the time. I
made up like alligators, any animal that didn't have a sound.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
For sure.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
I was just like and the crocodile says. And I
wanted them to just go to school or daycare and
be like, no, man, my dad said, and he's right.
He was running about cows. He was running about birds
and ducks.
Speaker 3 (27:19):
You know, say like, why would he lie tell me
that it couldn't possibly be because of his insecurity? Isn't
mean because he don't know nothing.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
As one member of this panel who's not a father,
I think you did the right thing. I believe I
want him to not respect you. Think you don't know
anything about nature. My dad doesn't even know what a
giraffe sounds like. He's supposed to keep me safe in
the world. You don't even know about a giraffe noise.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
If you want to run my household, you better know
what a giraffe.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Better make it up, man, until we see one and
we're proven otherwise. And I remember we went to the
zoo one time and they were like, they're not doing
the sound. I was like, man, they're maybe tired or something.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Oh'sick.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
This is just a problem with zoos sedate the animals.
They're not themselves here. We got to see the nature.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
When we go to Africa, these are in captivity. Man,
I don't even know this is true. But did y'all
watch Blackfish, the documentary about World. Oh yeah, so you know,
I went to see World all the time as a kid,
and I remember that. I remember the dorsal finn thing specifically,
it's like flapped over in SeaWorld and we were you know,
(28:35):
the kids always asked and they will say, oh, you know,
they made up something like, oh yeah, this happens a
lot with these type of whales. And then in Blackfish
they were like, that never happens. Ever, it only happened
that SeaWorld, being like, oh my god, I just I
believe these people because they work with the well, it
never crossed my mind that they could be its bias
(28:56):
and propaganda. It's big, big sea. World wants to frame
little children's behind and like that's what parents like, Like
somebody just says something and goes with it so confidently
you try to question him.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
Listen, kids, his dorsal fin has flipped that way because
he's having too much fun.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
He's doubled over.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
You ever had too many Skittles kids. That's what he
feels like.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
And we don't know enough to challenge them. Man, they
have to know them and be with them all day.
Speaker 3 (29:28):
I mean they were beating this ship out the whales,
honestly struggling to keep his fin up.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
I'm not pro that, but they did a good job
because SeaWorld was funny. Shit Broz to go manin the
Dolphins showed SeaWorld is one of the top five experiences
of my whole life.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
All right, guys, I shouldn't do this. I should not
do this. We're already having a great time. I watched
that documentary with my wife and I was like, if
I never knew this, I would never know this. So
we went to vacation in Florida, like I don't two
years ago and they were like, we got tickets to
Sea Worm, Man, we should go. And I was just like, yes,
(30:09):
I'm not gonna rob my children. At least a chance
to watch black Fish and know them. Lie. But they
gotta see a well do you have to? Man, I'm sorry,
see world is still open. The documentary didn't do enough damage.
Speaker 7 (30:22):
Man.
Speaker 2 (30:22):
People were like, oh, that's crazy, but it's still doing well.
Speaker 4 (30:26):
And you gotta know the steaks. You gotta know the
steaks you got. Then you gotta choose. You have to
know how much fun you had. But then you have
to be like, all right, now, I choose because otherwise
you never even got to have that fun.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
And that's probably my issue, is I've I've chosen not
to do it. But it's only because I've never tried
that sweet Sea World cocaine, you know what I mean,
Like I've never sweet gotten a taste.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
It's good.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
It seems like it's I feel so bad, but I'm like, man, man,
it is cool. Though I'm sorry, man, there's we just
gotta be honest with ourselves. Man, we are we are
not perfect people. We're flawed individuals. And I let capitalism
get the best of me. And I was all in
for like years when I saw that. It was like
(31:10):
years I didn't take my kids to see world. But
you know, I was weak in that moment and I
had We had the best time. It's amazing. It's amazing.
It's amazing. Maybe feel more guilty, like if it was terrible,
I have been like, man, this is man, I shouldn't
even but because it was so good, I was. I mean,
the food was good, the rides.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
We watched, the show, we ate, well, it was. It
was a hell of a time.
Speaker 4 (31:37):
But listen, here's what I argue. It's that not the
mark of a truly great father. You took the burden
of that on you, and you internalized it. You didn't
catch down generational blackfish trauma. You said, no, I'm gonna
let these little kids enjoy it. I know the evil
that works with them.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
That's nice.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
I'm a hero. Yeah, I don't think.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
I don't think our listeners are going to agree. But that's.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
All right.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
We have to take a break. We'll be back with
more Kevil on stage and more. My mama told me.
Speaker 7 (32:22):
It was due to a feces thrown all over the walls,
the floor, the ceiling, and a stunk.
Speaker 6 (32:29):
We are back with stage Michael Jackson. Of course it
was Michael was a real clip. Of course it was
a real clip.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
I've never heard that wasn't a or something already.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
If I'm not mistaken, it was something relating to the
Second Trial. I feel like it has something to do
with with the Second Trial, because that was the that
was the era. If we if I'm remembering correctly, where
Michael Jackson had linked up with Johnny cochrane and they
were sort of playing him heavy as a black artist
being mistreated.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Uh.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
They did the same OJ ship where they're like, this
is a racial issue, and I think it had something
to do with people like abusing him or mistreating him
and and like giving him a shitty booboo room.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
Or something like that. Play it one more time.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
I was hoping you would say that, yeah.
Speaker 7 (33:32):
There was doo dooo feces thrown all over the walls,
the floor of the ceiling in a stunk.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
That I've never heard.
Speaker 1 (33:45):
What I like.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
What I like most is that he says there was
doo dooo feces as if they are some sort of conjunction,
that it is a that to say one, you cannot
say one without the other. It was due do feis.
Speaker 4 (34:00):
I mean, I think there's levels and we can all
agree that sometimes you do these, sometimes you feces.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
I feel like it's only used in medical terms. But
it's so black that Michael Jackson says doodoo.
Speaker 3 (34:15):
Like, hey, he's a black man.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
I imagine him not in character like man, there's doodoo
everywhere and there man's going on Michael Jackson, Man, you'll
got doodoo, you got feces over here? Come on, you
sold eighty million albums? I do and fe You think
Prince got dooty owners?
Speaker 3 (34:37):
Wall on the fucking Beatles catalog? What is brong with y'all?
Speaker 2 (34:45):
I got a monkey, nigga monkey, don't no doodle? He
no better than don't do it at me. I wish
brothers one. Don't doodle at me. I kill him dead.
I don't you do like that?
Speaker 1 (34:58):
He ships in a toilet like an adult?
Speaker 3 (35:02):
What a while? We were talking about Sea World earlier.
What a wild time where we were just letting regular citizens'
own exotic animals take them to award shows.
Speaker 4 (35:12):
And it's such a dangerous practice because I grew up
thinking like I thought that as a kid, I was like, yeah,
I fucked around, I can get a monkey.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
That was my dream.
Speaker 3 (35:20):
I was gonna get a monkey, Yeah, one hundred percent.
I was going to get a spider monkey when I
grew up.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
See this is fucked up.
Speaker 4 (35:26):
In hindsight, I think I wanted a chimp, which is
the danger most one that kills you.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Yeah, yeah, I seen a chimp rip some dudes head.
He ripped the scalp Off. You seen it, not in
real life, it was it was on the internet. He
was like, you know those places, but we're gonna pet
the monkeys, and the monkey like grabbed his head and
just rip fuck and it was like white meat.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
And I was like, I'm not doing that no more.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
I used to want to go to Thailand and do that,
and now I'm like, I'm unaware of monkey strength. And
I've seen Planet of the Apes, but I ain't seen
head to the white meat and one fell swoop.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
Yeah, And I mean because Plant of the Apes is
more about their mental strength. Yeah, Physically that's a worthy opponent.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
They're formidable in many ways.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
This is great. It's a good time perform It's like,
can you imagine somebody hopping into this podcast at this
moment in here? You know, physically they're a formative poet
Jim bar anyway.
Speaker 3 (36:25):
And then they get off and they're like, what is
that podcast about? It like black conspiracy theories. I think
it's black people in conspiracy theories, but sometimes they talk
about strong ass monkeys.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
And Michael Jackson saying Dodo, man, it all makes sense
if you heard the whole episode. You can't skip around
you gotta from around.
Speaker 3 (36:46):
Enjoy the thing.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
No, you gotta buckle, and we're not a dalliance.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Yeah, keV, I did some research on your conspiracy theory
that I would love to unpack with you. I went
to the National Weather Service website to review some of
the songs admits about lightning, and they do feel a
lot of weird questions, including if crouching down or lying
(37:11):
down in the center of a field during a storm
will keep you safe. Uh, And I assure you all
it does not. It in fact, just makes you dumb
and looks silly. They said, lying down especially is dangerous
because if lightning strikes nearby, the electric current that moves
through the ground, it's just like has a better chance
(37:33):
of spreading through your whole body.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
Oh that's dope, I have some more to be scared of.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
That's good, that's what.
Speaker 3 (37:39):
Yeah, So don't lie down.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Thinking up that's a good question.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
That is a good question.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
You're weighing like I'm jumping, so I'm closer to the lightning.
But if it misses me and hits the ground, I'm
not part of the conducted electricity.
Speaker 1 (37:54):
It wasn't.
Speaker 3 (37:55):
It wasn't in their questions, but I'm happy to submit
that one. Afterwards, I'll also submit can you pray the
lightning away? Let's let's just hit all the silliest ones.
We confirmed.
Speaker 2 (38:07):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (38:09):
One of the things that they say, though, is that
it is dangerous to be outside in all circumstances during
a lightning storm. However, they say the closest thing to
a safe alternative we have is being in your actual house.
So you were already doing the right thing by being
in a home with all of your electricity turned off.
And they say that the only time that it actually
(38:31):
is dangerous in your house of being struck by lightning
is if you.
Speaker 2 (38:35):
Are around the electric slide.
Speaker 3 (38:38):
Yeah, if you're doing the electric slide.
Speaker 2 (38:41):
Especially the part where we go like that, that's the production,
that's the conduction.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
If you strike while it's striking, that's a man.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
You're done. You are calling for lightning if you're doing that.
Speaker 4 (38:55):
That's what it started out. It was a Native American
lightning dance. We co opted it.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
A lot of people don't know.
Speaker 3 (39:02):
You can't see it. It's electric. But they say that
the one time that it is dangerous is that if
you are around something that conducts electricity. So they ask
you to avoid corded phones if you're still doing that shit,
electrical appliances, wires, TV cables, computers, plumbing, metal doors and windows.
(39:27):
No mention of silver shredder toys on the list.
Speaker 4 (39:31):
Here's a question that I have immediately. This is where
my closed Yep, you say plumbing. Now, let's say I
am taking one of the aforementioned dodoos.
Speaker 3 (39:43):
One of one of Michael's infamous dodoos.
Speaker 4 (39:47):
And I'm steepling now, so you understand that I'm being
very serious. Yeah, is there a possibility of lightning striking
my booty?
Speaker 1 (39:55):
Hoole.
Speaker 3 (39:57):
I'm gonna go so far as to say the boot
is not the threat. There there are stories of people
being in lightning strikes while taking showers. It seems like
showers are more of a threat than lightning shooting up
the toilet into your booty hole.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
It's got a scoops out hugs the sides of the bull.
Speaker 3 (40:27):
If you do it right, the doo move out the way.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
Yeah, I have a lot of iron.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
It does sound though, like if I were using a
process of elimination, which I imagine your mother may have
been doing at the time, that maybe if you turned
out all the lights, and you've turned out all the
things that in theory conduct electricity, and you additionally had
to consider other things that might be a threat to
your child. Something shimmery and or silver would fall into
(41:02):
like a safer category. Then let's say trench coat, Raphael,
you know what I mean, like Native American, Michaelangelo, whatever
the other alternatives you had in your house. One of
the other things that I wanted to look up, and
this was pretty exciting, actually, is that apparently I wanted
to look up weird stories or insane stories of lightning strikes,
(41:24):
and there are some pretty weird ones. And apparently the
person who has been struck the most by lightning is
a man named Roy Cleveland Sullivan who worked as a
park ranger in Shenanandoah Shenandoah Shenandoah Okay hell Yeah National
Park in Virginia between nineteen forty two and nineteen seventy seven,
and he claims to have been struck by lightning. Hold
(41:47):
for the drum roll seven times. Seven times he was
struck by lightning and survived all of them. I'm seeing
some skepticism on your faces.
Speaker 4 (42:02):
Well, I first of all want to make light of
the fact that you thought it might be doing.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
He just announced it twice. Shut a door. If you
haven't corrected him, he might They're still telling how many
different ways he could have went with that fellas.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
I was gonna keep making noises till I till I
made it feel right.
Speaker 1 (42:27):
A rookie outside linebacker.
Speaker 3 (42:34):
Just a nice simoen man who moved to the stage
to play football man.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
But seven times that's document who was there.
Speaker 3 (42:44):
So that's the thing.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
It's rare.
Speaker 3 (42:46):
I think that lightning strikes and there's just somebody there
being like, whoa, you got a short by lightning.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
They're just like, this is crazy, Roy, you are on
a roll, my man, I gotta flip to the next day.
Speaker 1 (43:00):
Child.
Speaker 3 (43:03):
He did have a number of sort of like artifacts
to sort of demonstrate or like things that that he
had to show for it. Like twice I think he
got struck on the top of his head and it
like singed the middle of his his ranger hat and
basically burned a hole in the middle and at one
point lit his.
Speaker 1 (43:24):
Hair on fire.
Speaker 3 (43:25):
So all of that stuff is documented, and I don't
know that he did that independently, you know what I mean.
I don't think that he was just like fucking around
and lighting his hair on fire on his own, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (43:36):
So this leads to my next question.
Speaker 4 (43:38):
How much silver did my man have on him?
Speaker 1 (43:43):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (43:43):
He was drippy flying toys. We need to find out
if he was an avid shredder collector. Yeah, and he's
just like, under no circumstances ever, even in the house
without these, I don't care how many times I would
rather die.
Speaker 3 (43:58):
I don't give both.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
Well, my mom says, he's like I got six times.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
It's not gonna happen again.
Speaker 3 (44:07):
It's only making super Shredders. It's only making super Shredders.
Speaker 1 (44:15):
How old was he? How is he dead?
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Now?
Speaker 3 (44:18):
He has to be dead. He was born in like
nineteen thirteen or some shit like that. And was he
Did he die of lightning complications? I don't think so.
I think he lived a pretty regular life, it seems.
This is what makes it even crazier is that it
doesn't even feel like he got messed up that bad
from his lightning strikes, like it his legs. I didn't
(44:38):
look all that up.
Speaker 1 (44:39):
You get hit by lightning you're not does not work.
Speaker 3 (44:43):
Oh yeah, I didn't think about that.
Speaker 2 (44:46):
That's the first thing I thought.
Speaker 4 (44:53):
If that goes, there's no way you're gonna make a regular.
Speaker 2 (44:57):
His kid better be fast as fucked right. His baby's
raiding lighting seven times. You are making electronic children.
Speaker 3 (45:05):
Yeah, and when you come it says finish him, and
then then rating comes out. That's not my best joke,
but I got something.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
I got It was solid.
Speaker 3 (45:21):
I also read about one of the oldest and worst
lightning strikes ever recorded, happening in a town called Brescia, Italy.
Does anybody have a correction for Brescia Breccia? I don't
know how to power?
Speaker 1 (45:36):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (45:36):
Tittysville, Italy. In seventeen sixty nine, a church was being
used as a battery to store approximately one hundred tons
of gunpowder. The church took a direct hit of lightning,
and all the gunpowder eventually caught fire and exploded. After
all the dust settled, nearly a sixth of the city
(45:57):
was destroyed and killed nearly three thousand people.
Speaker 2 (46:00):
Oh my god, wow, I started laughingly.
Speaker 3 (46:04):
Yeah, sorry, fellas, Sorry, this can't all be fun in games.
Three thousand dead Italians from the seventeen.
Speaker 9 (46:12):
Hundreds sounds like a shudder job to me. No, I
wish you would get sorry. I laughed too early. You
could not have anticipated. That's how that story ended.
Speaker 2 (46:28):
Man having such a good time.
Speaker 3 (46:31):
Oh okay, I'll tell you one more example, and this
one actually is pretty fun. This one doesn't get sad.
But I found a part of the National Weather Service
website that is self submitted, like lists of recent survivors
of lightning strikes. Like people can type in right in
there and be like, I survived and this is what happened,
(46:51):
blah blah blah. And most of the injuries that they
report are like, it's it ranges, it's the full gamut.
They they chronic pain, lost, coma's depression, ears, ringing, muscle funk,
loss of muscle function, all of that shit. But there
was one person on this list, a woman named Missy,
who claimed to have gotten extrasensory perception ESP from her
(47:15):
encounter with lightning.
Speaker 4 (47:17):
So okay, and some of our listens, I know, but
some of our listeners maybe don't fully understand ESP. Yeah,
as an actual like that guy Cruskin invented it, right,
I don't know much about I.
Speaker 1 (47:32):
Well, it's me, it's me. I don't know what it is.
I don't know what it fuck?
Speaker 3 (47:35):
It is like, no, listen, I'm glad you're asking that.
And in fact, I tracked down the email that she sent. Oh,
and I can read it to you all now. The
subject line is high price for pizza question mark, supernatural
side effect question mark, And she says, I was struck
by lightning about twelve years ago. No one ever told
(47:56):
me that you weren't supposed to be on a landline
telephone during an electrical storm. So there I was.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
Say it again, she didn't have a black mom, now black.
Speaker 3 (48:04):
Mama, nobody supposed to be here.
Speaker 2 (48:13):
Well, fuck.
Speaker 1 (48:17):
That one didn't even make that much sense.
Speaker 2 (48:18):
I was. It just felt boy, what you know what,
I don't mind it.
Speaker 4 (48:22):
Yeah, sometimes it's just sometimes it's magic, it's not science.
Speaker 3 (48:28):
She says. So there I was calling in a carry
out pizza order when I noticed that the lightning and
thunder was getting more intense and coming more frequently. I
heard static on the phone line, which kept getting louder
and louder. Then I heard what sounded like a loud explosion,
and at the same time I noticed a bright white
light at my feet, which was football shaped and had spikes.
(48:51):
It blew me across the floor, and I was knocked
out for a few seconds. My son came running into
the kitchen to find me laying there on the floor.
When I started to get a numbing feeling on one
side of my body, starting at the toes and working upward,
he called nine one one. After spending several hours in
the emergency room, they confirmed that I had been hit
by lightning. Through the phone lines after the strike, I
(49:13):
noticed a strange side effect. It's almost as if I
got esp extrasensory perception. Every once in a while, there
have been times where I speak to someone, speak someone's name,
someone that I haven't been heard from or seen in
many years, and all of a sudden they walk in
the door. Or time, I knew my plumbing was going
(49:34):
to be back up in the laundry, and sure enough,
that night it happened. I've had eerie feelings about this
just before they've actually happened. I've actually created a list
somewhere in my house of these incidents because I couldn't
believe it myself. Most people that know me are made,
and so am I. This periodic thing only started after
(49:55):
my lightning incident. Wow, how bought in?
Speaker 1 (50:00):
Are well? Not at all? No, No, I don't. I don't.
I don't, I don't.
Speaker 2 (50:06):
Maybe I'm just the cynic in my old About three
sentences in, I was like girl, and that.
Speaker 4 (50:14):
Was like, Oh, you knew the laundry was gonna back
up because this ship's been rattling for six months.
Speaker 1 (50:22):
Fucking call your landlord. What are you talking about?
Speaker 3 (50:24):
They're not great examples. She's not damling it with the
examples for esp.
Speaker 2 (50:29):
Oh, not at all. He was like, Yeah, if that
was Shark Tank, I'd be like, I'm out for don't
door for this reason, I don't believe you.
Speaker 1 (50:37):
For this reason, I'm out. I'd be like, I actually
have a lot of friends in the laundry space. It is.
Speaker 3 (50:47):
It is a wild choice to be like, no, I
did get superpowers, and what is my power? I can
tell when my laundry room is gonna it's gonna stop
working the way it's supposed to.
Speaker 1 (50:58):
Yeah, that's just bot.
Speaker 3 (51:00):
You wasted your powers?
Speaker 1 (51:02):
Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (51:04):
And did they get that pizza for free? I don't
think so. I don't think the pizza got delivered. It
sounds like she had a rough night without pizza. And also, uh,
shitty superpowers damn.
Speaker 1 (51:16):
Yeah, you know you lose something exactly.
Speaker 3 (51:20):
I think if we if we can all agree, it
seems as if we we we are all sort of
certain that shredder toys are in no way a threat
in a lightning storm, and unfortunately, superpowers are not easily achieved,
even for those who are struck by lightning. It requires
a more miraculous interaction with chemicals and a body to
(51:43):
truly turn you supernatural.
Speaker 1 (51:46):
Yeah. Absolutely, Yeah, I think that's.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Damn well, keV. I think we did it. I think
this is I think this is a whole shebang.
Speaker 2 (51:55):
This is perfect.
Speaker 1 (51:56):
Man.
Speaker 2 (51:56):
I still got time to go to my son's soccer game.
This is great timing. I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (52:00):
Yeah, you're doing it.
Speaker 3 (52:01):
Do you want to tell the people where they can
find you and what cool shit you have going on? Okay,
hell yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2 (52:12):
You know, if they're curious enough that I should be
easy enough to fight.
Speaker 4 (52:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (52:16):
Yeah, And that's not saying it's just.
Speaker 3 (52:18):
Like, no, you go viral often enough that I think
they'll bump into you.
Speaker 2 (52:24):
That's fair to say. Come see about it, Kevi on stage.
Just search that wherever you're looking, you'll probably find me.
Speaker 3 (52:30):
Well not us. We still plug Bory what you got.
Speaker 4 (52:33):
I want to be at the Comedy Bar in Seattle,
Washing gym and on the twenty seven to twenty eighth,
and I desperately need you to buy tickets. Go on
my Instagram Cool Guy Jokes eighty seven and all my
links are there. I got some other dates coming up,
but that's what I got right now.
Speaker 3 (52:51):
Yeah, and as always, you can follow me at Langston Kerman.
I don't have dates just yet to tell you about,
but they're coming. And if you want to us your
own conspiracy theories, if you want to send us your
own drops, if you want to tell us how you
achieved your superpower, send it all to my mama pod
at gmail dot com. We would love to hear from you.
(53:11):
Go to my mama told me dot Merch Central to
buy some of the merch that we have cooking. They
are moving to them, shirts and hats, they're moving fast.
We want y'all to have them. So go there and
like subscribe, do whatever bullshit you're supposed to do to
keep the podcast afloat. We love it, we need it,
We love you. That's the whole thing. By bitch, Look
(53:34):
if you hate cops just because of co Next time
you get in trouble, call.
Speaker 2 (53:39):
The crackhead.
Speaker 5 (53:47):
My crow chips in your naies.
Speaker 2 (53:50):
All Kuala Bears are racist, The host layers money and
turning stuff from cans opinting at
Hosts And Creators
Langston Kerman
David Gborie
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