Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Sometimes I've been thinking about Reggie not giving up that
fish HOOKI yeah, he really wanted it.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
I really wanted it, and he was not going to
tell me where he God, he really was like, no,
this is uh, this is private. Yeah, it's like, you
don't even want to go to that neighborhood, bro.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Yeah, here's that's how you play. You was like, oh,
it's not even it's from my old neighborhood. You can't
even get over there.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Yeah, He's like, man, busses don't even go that way.
Get your shut the fuck up.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Chips in your bears are racist layer Oh the money
turny stuff, I.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
Can't tell me.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Yaw, y'all real smooth. There it is there, it is.
Little mamas and gentiles alike, Welcome to another funamal episode
of My Mama Told Me.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
The Post where we died deep into the pockets of
black conspiracy.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
You know what the fuck we came to prove not
even goddamn thing. We ain't helping, not even trying to.
That wasn't our goal at all. No, we don't even
have the illusion of it. If you dumb motherfuckers are
learning something from this, h yeah, boom, what you blew it.
Are you crazy?
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Sometimes I do see like comments and stuff and I'm like, oh,
there's people who are taking this seriously.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Yeah that's a worry. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Yeah, yeah, that's so worry when people are like, actually,
you know this is stupid.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
Yeah you know I didn't. I didn't think about this.
Hum yeah, actually, because this is dumb. Actually listen to
the news. Yeah yeah, no there, but yeah, the news
I guess is hard to believe too. So yeah, have
you read all the Shakespeare? All of it? Yeah? No,
(01:58):
not even I haven't even put a big dent in it.
I think I'm gonna do it this year. It hit
a lot of Shakespeare. Yeah, are you a fan?
Speaker 4 (02:07):
No?
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Are you doing this to like force yourself to become
a fan? I would just like to know what it's
all about. Like I think I'll do like spark notes
alongside with it. Like I don't need to like not
like gonna just write notes about every single You're not
gonna like figure this out.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yeah, but I do want to know what all the
plays are in a way where I've read them all.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
I don't need to read them all, but I would
like to that point a little bit of uh of
appreciation for some of the ones that are ones. That's
how I feel like I want to know king Lee
or well enough that I go like, oh, I get
why people fuck with clean king Lee or so hard.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
That's that's how I That's what I mean. I want
to Well, I'm just gonna it's not so big that
it's crazy to especially because you could just read it
when it play at a time. Yeah, it's how I'm thinking, right,
But I think I can. I just ordered it on Amazon.
I'd like to get it done by the end of
the year. Wow, I don't think it's that crazy. Like, bro,
I've tried to read The Idiots so many times and
(03:12):
I just can't that Russian shit.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
It's like two dens for me or something. I really, Uh,
what I like and what I've been sort of aiming
for as a goal is that I'm just now fully
being honest about what I like in books. And I
like thriller, horror and I don't even care if it's garbage. Right, Okay,
(03:34):
I got you, And so like I've resolved that, like,
I may not have an opinion on a bunch of
like the classics, right, but I do still want to
be reading. I still want to be learning, growing, and
so I'll focus my energy on some shit I really
fuck with and just make that part of my wheelhouse
(03:54):
rather than you know, trying to be fit in with
a bunch of people who grew up reading some shit
that I'm never going to appreciate as much as they do.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
It's not even the fitting into me though, it's just like,
like the Shakespeare stuff. It's like a bunch of stuff
I like is based off of that. Almost everything, you
know what I mean. So it's like I want that
knowledge just in and of that, yeah, less than like
I don't really want to talk to people about Shakespeare
right or most books.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
But I also think, you know, all of it's based
off of that because it was the first thing. And
how many stories are That's what I mean. There's like
six stories and he did them first, so here we are.
And that conspiracy that he didn't do them or he
had a lot of help he had that Shakespeare. I
think there's a conspiracy that Shakespeare is more than one person.
(04:41):
It's like a Banksy. Yeah, I didn't know that Banksy
is thought to be more than one person. I thought that.
I don't know, though, I yeah, I'm not sure. I
don't know enough about either of them. But there are
theories that Shakespeare was multiple people. There are theories that
Shakespeare was a woman. There's also a lot of theories
that he was gay, and that like half the sonnets
(05:03):
are about a young boy, that he was like one
specific young boy. I my understanding is that there were
like a few, but like there's one dude in particular
that really shines in them sonnets.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Was he working class? He couldn't have been working class.
He was writing in Shakespeare. Yeah, he's a pretty rich guy.
He looked rich to me because he had an earring.
Speaker 5 (05:25):
Yeah yeah, big old puffed up collars then like a
motherfucker with some money.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
That's not I feel like there will be a point
where black people get to that collar, oh, puffed up collar.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah, I think so. Do you think we're heading towards
a puffed up collar era? I think it's gonna happen
at some point. Now do you do you think about
that in think progress? I don't think about fashion in
those terms. Oh, I kind of just think about it
as like, oh, what a weird face. I mean, I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
I guess they say like it can be I don't know.
Enough about fashion. I understand how the trends are reflective
of society. Like I remember hearing something about, like in
the ninety shit was baggy because we were that prosperous.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
But I don't know if that's real. Oh yeah, there's
always that thing where they go like during Victorian times,
a thick woman meant that you were well fed. Right,
They're attractive to everyone around you, right, And maybe that's true.
Maybe they were getting like horned up for these big
old thick ladies because they were rich. But then I
(06:31):
wonder how much of that is like hindsight bias, where
we go like, oh, that explains why everybody. Everybody was
gonna be horning for the queen anyway, right, I think
that she happened to be a little chubby, It doesn't
matter where. That's our our. That's the way the world
works is you're gonna be horny for the rich lady.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
I think, more specifically than people were always gonna be
horny for rich ladies. I don't think there was ever
a time when fat buds weren't cool, you know what
I'm saying, Like, I think that was always probably pretty.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
I don't, I don't, you know, I think in the
same way.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
If anything, the most present time is probably the first
time that people didn't like that buds.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I think in the same way that like, media has
poisoned our perspective on a lot of things. But I
think fat butts are one of the biggest victims of
media poisoning. Damn, yeah, that might be it, because I
I do feel this way.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
I feel like ass got out of control and the
way that titties did it at least at least at
least in my life, right, because like you think about
our age in the nineties, it was like we still
like ass.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
But I feel like the zeitgeist was titty, titties was
titties was king. Titties was king in the nineties.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Yeah, but I feel like the extreme of titties was
not the same as the extreme of ass.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
Now, WHOA, yeah, you you think people have taken ass
technology further than they took titty technology. One. I don't know, man.
I saw a lot of videos of big tittied ladies
crushing cans and and I don't think normal though. I
don't think I think that was freak shit. I think
(08:21):
that was friendship that you saw.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
I don't think that like I think if you compare
Kim Kardashian's ass yeah to Pam Anderson's titties, Ye, Kim
Kardashian's ass is more outside the realm of oh.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
I will say this, I think that bbls have become
so a part of our everyday lives that we don't
even notice them anymore. You know what I mean that
your TSA agent has a BBL That's where I see
the most of them. Gloria, they're going crazy over I
don't know if y'all got a work discount, but you're
(09:01):
going nuts. It's crazy LaGuardia ass like in the last
three four years, and frankly, some of you would do
well to ask a different doctor for a second, a
second consultation. I have seen some terrible ones at Laguardi.
I've seen some wild point diamond shaped women. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
And I here's my question too, I don't know does
that speak to surgery in general or is that something
within the nature of the ass and or the titty.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Well, here's something I can tell you that I learned
pretty recently. My sister in law explained this to me
that to be a plastic surgeon, specifically, the type of
consummetic plastic surgeon that they are. You don't have to
necessarily have a surgical license. You don't have to be
a surgeon. You just have to like have a medical
(09:53):
certification to be able to do a lot of these surgery. So, like,
I can't remember his name, but like the dude who's
like the biggest, one of the biggest like surgeons in
the US who does like all the like weird celebrity
bbms Miami. It might be doctor Miami. It might be
a different dude, but either way, a doctor Miami type
(10:14):
is a dentist. He's not an actual fucking plastic surgeon
at all. God damn. He just is a dude who
technically has a medical degree. And it is like, yeah,
I'm about to get a bag. We need to go
back to a simpler time when doctor Miami was a
cocaine dealer. Yeah, yeah, that's when we understood the world.
That was easy.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
You got dentists making butts, that's crazy. That's they were
already on the edge.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
They're not even they haven't even mastered veneer technology. Yeah, man,
and now you can put butts in Nah, that's crazy. Yeah, no,
it's scary. Shit when you think about, like who's controlling
the imagery that we not only experienced but like put
on ourselves.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Yeah, I can't wait till the butts get all Mmm,
it's gonna be funny. You think twenty sixty.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
You think the disintegrating BBL is gonna be worth the
worth the potential nightmare we we live in inside of
everybody having.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
One, I know about worth it, but it's kind of
it'll be a fun part of that to be like, oh,
remember when we were going.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Crazy, You're saying there's still a silver lining regardless. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
I think it'll be. But maybe the age well, I
don't really know. I've never seen an old fic, but
I don't think that this technology has gotten old yet.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
That's the problem. And I think that's why. And look
that I think titty technology got older and they seem
to be doing okay. I think some titties, some titties
are aging really well. Yeah, and I think some of
them are not.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
But I think that's just the difference in quality of
work more than it is like the technology could not
handle being old.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
It's gonna be crazy when whatever dudes start doing more regularly. Yeah, old,
because hair is just the beginning, My friend.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Oh no, what do you think's coming?
Speaker 1 (12:02):
I think it's all you think they're going to figure
out how to give guys bigger dicks. You don't think
that's where science has been leading this whole time. All
of our great discoveries, the moon, landing, the Internet, it
was all leading.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Dudes being able to get bigger dick. That's the whole
point of this. Well do it here? If not that, yeah,
and then that's when that's the fall of Rome. If
you're willing to break your shins so that you could
get another four inches, you're one hundred willing to let
them inject some shit into your PPM. See what happens.
And do you want four inches on top? Or do
(12:38):
you want four inches of dick? Really? I think the
truth is you wanted four inches of dick, and the
technology he hadn't caught up yet. That's what I'm saying.
I think I think you will stand so tall with
four extra inches of dick. I would my posture would
be so tall.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
Just from ego alone. I would will another inch off
the top on the top, like I'm growing an inch.
Speaker 6 (13:04):
That's m hgh is gonna it's gonna burn back up.
It's gonna like an old factory resetting. That motherfucker is
kicking back in because I got four more inches a dick, bro,
that's all we're all looking for. That's why you have
a job, that's why you drive a car, man like. So, yeah,
I do think that's where it's going. And I think
(13:25):
that's quite frankly, a power we're not fit or ready
to harness.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
I I think that is the fall of me. Yeah,
that's it. I think once everybody is walking around with
a big old dick, it is uh scary the results
that are gonna come out of that. You know how
many more wars everybody? Everybody's gonna because.
Speaker 1 (13:57):
I don't think it becomes everybody has a big dick,
so no one has one because we're flowed, we're people,
So it's it's gonna instead of that, it's gonna be like, no,
I got this big.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
Old dick, doo, you can't talk to me like that.
And now nobody Now nobody works at Target.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
And now nobody works at Target because we all got
huge because everybody's an entrepreneur, everybody whole crypto and they
you you know how many coins launched if we all
get big dick.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
You spent money to get that big dick, so you
know you earned you. You went through the trenches for
that big Yeah. So yeah, you're gonna walk around and
act like you have a big dick. Now, Bro, Guys
with big dicks walk around crazy and they didn't even
earn it. They didn't earn it at all. Imagine if
you put that shit on layaway, a man and a
lady gave you that.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
Yeah, you just got lucky. Yeah, real like, you just
got lucky. Imagine if you worked hard. There's good people
are gonna immigrate to this country for dicks.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Whoa my life, came here for a better life.
Speaker 4 (15:05):
And also.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Six he's just bunting tables it Olive Garden. He's gonna
go back, He's gonna go back to say.
Speaker 6 (15:16):
Doctor North Dakota assures me he didn't give me the
biggest hug that's ever existed.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
North.
Speaker 7 (15:28):
They're gonna have to put this technology somewhere unreachable, no,
where you really have to earn it, because if it's
just in Miami and they're giving niggas big dicks in Miami,
we're done.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
So No, it's a it's a rat. Once new York
finds out there giving big dicks down in not Miami,
it's gonna be crazy. And in the Carolinas it's gonna fit.
They got big, big, big dick week on the beach. Yeah,
oh man, myrtle, No, it's we really candle it, We
really candle it. You scared the funk out of me.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
No, imagine the whole Alien Gonzales saga. If you had
just been coming here to get a bigger dick.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
That's why that rap saying, yeah, they don't do any
Cuba like. Look, man, what I got right now ain't
gonna work. And I'm willing to break every law in
this country. I'm willing to up end your legal system
for the sake of getting a bigger hug.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
I'm not the type of guy to say this, but
if we get big dick technology in Miami, go on
and build that wall.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
We're gonna need it. We're gonna need We're gonna need it. Look,
this is for our safety. These people coming over the border.
We don't know what signs of penis is terrifying the
little penises they have. We can't afford to give them
big dicks. Build that wall. We can all agree, we
(17:01):
don't want the gene pool water down in that way. Look,
look these tiny pps.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
I just said, if you don't have a big dick
build along, this can't be where you're getting any information.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
You said it, and I liked it so much I
thought we should circle it. Yeah yeah, yeah, this is
we have said it before. We're not role models. No,
I even forget to pronounces roll model.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
I was just gonna say that. I was just gonna
say that I row row your boat models. Yeah, yeah,
I forget that.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
It's roll roll model roll yeah, like you want with
the e yeah, not like uh no, not like the dice.
Wouldn't that be funny? Dice hero, my dice hero play dice?
Uh not really.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
I think you would actually really enjoy it. And not
even like at a house. I mean at Vegas, it's
like at the craps table. It's like it's an energy game.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
It was the it was like the bad kid thing
to do at school, right was be playing dice in
the bathroom. And I think I was such a I
don't want to be in a bad kid like bad
bad kid. I liked. I like being tangential, tangential to
a lot of like misbehaving people actually bad kids. They
(18:36):
didn't want it to be like I didn't want to
be like a bad kid. That's what I'm saying. Vegas.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
Yeah, it's like at the table, everybody's drunk, you're on
a run, you're betting with some Swedish guy. I find
you're asking him how to say stuff in Swedish.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
I find Vegas so intimidating, and real Sinos in general
so intimidating, in part because everybody around you seems like
they know what they're doing, that's true, and I don't,
and you feel like an asshole to be like, can
you teach me? No, I can play.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
It is built to make you feel like an asshole.
It's built for you to either really know what you're
doing or to come lose your money and leave because
you're embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
And I think a lot of people would would maybe
break even if they were just willing to be like, hey,
I don't actually know how to play this that good?
Could someone help?
Speaker 4 (19:27):
Right?
Speaker 1 (19:27):
And the thing about crafts that'll happen this should be
getting on my nerves. You'll come and there'll be somebody
who's betting everybody, and then it comes to your role
and they don't bet, or they bet against you, and
you're like, oh, so as fuck me right right?
Speaker 2 (19:43):
You get like, you get angry. They think you're a
bad luck for some shit, for some shit. They don't
like your energy, they don't like your energy, and so
they bet against you. Yeah, and now you have a nemesis. Yeah.
But I've developed a callous because I've had a lot
of Chinese people yell at me bad luck. Okay. They
used to call me hawk Chai. Oh no, bad luck
(20:03):
in Chinese. No I piece that together.
Speaker 4 (20:05):
Yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
It was either that or it was the worst word.
Oh no.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
The other their one for black at the time was Obama.
Oh was twenty ten Okay, Yeah, it was like a
lot of Obama. You live in Oakland Obama? Whoa yeah
yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
So they didn't even consider that that there was only
one Obama. They were like, nah, y'all all Obama. Yes,
that's cool.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
And I would love to say I haven't participated in
similar activities going the other way.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
I think the nineties had us calling a lot of
people Jackie Chan, Yes, in a violent, shameful way. I
think we've talked about it on here. That whole movie
was just like you can't you talk crazy? Yeah, I
don't understand you. That's the whole movie.
Speaker 8 (21:02):
What's a Walk? It was like a very terrible cultural
and it was like Jackie jan.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Being very patient.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
They really Jackie Jed's like, in my country, I worked
hard and I earned this job, and here's the story.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
And Chrisucker's like, I don't even talk about that day? Did?
That was the only humanizing thing they did for him?
Was there? Like his dad's dead and he was a cop. Yeah,
so I guess he has a purpose. But like otherwise,
Chris Tucker was just a psychopath yelling at this man
who clearly doesn't speak English about touching his radio and
(21:44):
letting him tag along in the most dangerous scenarios imaginable. Yeah,
it was really, man, what a good movie it was.
It was what a pair. And that's why I want
to read Shakespeare because isn't that a Midsummer's Night's Dream?
Speaker 4 (21:56):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (21:57):
I have no idea, I don't. I don't think, so
i'll tell you when I read it.
Speaker 9 (22:03):
I'm gonna go so far as to say I don't
think a midsummer Night's Dream at any point has a
Chinese man saying the end word well, you.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Know what, let me read it for myself. Let me
be the judge of that. Yeah, all right, we we
should get into some voicemails. Yeah, we got voicemails from you,
sweet baby boys and baby girl. Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Shout out to the guy who last night told me
in Langston he wants to call in with his pants
off drunk.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
Yeah that was that was very nice. It's nice to
see fans out and about. Yeah. Yeah, you know, you
don't have to call that way.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
I mean, you're gonna do what you're gonna do. You're
an adult, and I think that's really all we could say.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
Uh. I haven't listened to anything. I haven't even looked
at the titles. I haven't either, But but let's let's one.
Let's let's be bold, let's be all right. Let me marry.
I got the title, I got, I got one that
seals exciting to the trigger.
Speaker 10 (23:07):
All right, here we go, Yo, first and foremost, love
your episode. One of my homeboys. Put me on.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
Can't stop listening, all right, you cussing a lot. I
like deep voice.
Speaker 10 (23:19):
I have a conspiracy.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
Okay, that's my fucking love custing. That's cool.
Speaker 11 (23:27):
I fucking love y'all. I gotta thing that tell you.
It makes me, you know what the energy is. He's
on break at work, like you ever be on breaking work,
and you just trying to fit it in, like.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Like walking in. It's like that. Yeah, his break just started,
but he've been thinking about this the whole time. I'll
tell him I'm about to put some ship on him.
They're gonna call me back, so I gotta I love it.
I gotta get this in. I love you all.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
Right.
Speaker 10 (24:00):
Here we go, Shane and Shark and his brother, Sterling Shark.
I think with everything going on right now with Shane
and Sharp, it's a ritual conspiracy. It's a ritual fucking conspiracy.
They're making him do all of this stupid shit so
(24:21):
he could get his brother into the Hall of Fame.
Speaker 1 (24:23):
WHOA, Okay, this isn't you're saying the NFL like some
sort of shame ritual. NFL is making him do this.
I would love that brother. I'm pretty sure this is
all shit.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
I don't think anybody assisted. I don't think that much
mouth motherfucker needs that much help. I think it's all
his idea. I think that boy ain't too bright and
uh and and he really is digging a nasty b
whole for himself. It's a deep because he's strong. That
(25:05):
whole got muscles on it. He's strong as hell, but
he is he is digging a hole. It is a
fascinating thing to watch listening.
Speaker 10 (25:13):
Sterland Shark's numbers were not amazing. They just wanted somebody
to get into Hall of Fame so they could keep
on having all these other players come later on. But
Sterling Shark was never gonna make it. Shannon put himself
on there and said, I would do whatever to keep
my brother into the Hall of Fame.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
That's it, Okay, listen, I understand what you're saying, and
I love my brother. Yeah, thank you for saying that.
I think a lot of people will worry he might
be listening any any of the three and my sisters too,
they're not listening.
Speaker 4 (25:53):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
I don't know if you have sex with a twenty
year old to help your brother, you know what I'm saying.
I don't think that's like he's like, I gotta do it.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
I don't want to.
Speaker 12 (26:05):
I gotta do it for Sterling, my sacrifice, fucking twenty
year older.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
I don't think. I don't think he I think he
isn't a hero's tinge.
Speaker 1 (26:17):
No, I think it's a wild but because did Sterling,
because he does say he's one of those guys who's like,
my brother was better than I ever was, right.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
I think so, right, But I think everybody feels that
way about there just because he got taller first. Yeah,
I mean, Michael Jordan has all those stories about how
like his brother was like the the greater player, but
he never grew past like five eight. I was gonna say,
his brother's also five eight. Yeah, and it's like, well,
Jame's Larry. Yeah, He's like, well, I guess you could
(26:44):
say Larry's better, but like when you're in when you.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
Were twelve, he was, he was, And that's cool man, Yeah,
And I think that's fun. It's really dope. He's telling
people in the bar right now.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
Cheryl Miller was so good at basketball that she busted
Reggie Miller's for most of his life life. But eventually
Reggie Miller made it past what that is, you know
what I mean, we have to be honest about Errol
is more revolutionary for her game than one hundred percent.
(27:16):
But yeah, eventually Reggie became a giant who could do
some impossible shit, and that made it so that him
and Cheryl weren't on the same competitive level. And that's okay.
Do you think Cheryl ever gave it to him?
Speaker 1 (27:31):
Just like one time at Thanksgiving when nobody's around, she's like, Hey,
I think you're really good at basketball.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
Oh, I think I think you're really really good at that.
I think she gave that. Boy. Hell yeah, you can
feel it on him. You can't feel it on him.
I think he's spent his whole life just hoping she
would say that. Yeah, and she never gave him even
a taste of it. Well, there's still time, there's still time.
(27:57):
They're both still with us. Yeah, God, that would be
as far as Shannon's sharpest concerned. Yes, I don't believe
him to be a particularly altruistic guy. I think this
is a person who who has largely been out for
self for some time now. And I think I think
while his brother probably he does see his brother as
(28:19):
like a deserving person. I don't know that giving up
the career that he had like somehow made for himself
is a fair exchange for a Hall of fame.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
Yeah, which it's like, who's I don't even who's on
the Hall of Fame ballot. I don't even ever Like
every Hall of Fame ballot, it's always like two guys,
you know, like for a casual observer, like two guys,
you know, and then five guys that they're like, oh,
Apple Sauce Jenkins, the single bar.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
Helmet, you know what I mean? Dicky Markinson, Yeah, technique.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
And you're like, all right, I guess he was an
innovative nose tackle in the sixties.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
He's the first one to put stuff under his eyes. Yeah, yeah,
I guess they called it coonan. Now you're ready to
play football? Come here out about my rolling tied? And
are they coonan? Isn't it fun? Just a peel white sport,
(29:22):
Dick pel white sports. He will never catch us here.
They used to feel, the black man can't even run
this fast. Man, I wish I could have that.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
Seems like a great time to be alive as a
black man when we took over sports, Like, like to
see that happen in your that would be great. It
would almost be. It's because it's almost like, I policy
is obviously what helps or whatever, but the social win,
(29:57):
like black men taking over basketball. Do you think that
did more than having a black president for the first time.
I think I think that's why we don't we really
should be saying Bill Russell is the greatest player of
all time.
Speaker 2 (30:14):
Because of that specific because of the giant leap that
he forced a bunch of motherfuckers to make in regards
to how they saw the sport and the controlling parties
in it. I think you owe some shit to Bill Russell.
That's fair, you know what I mean, Like, I think
(30:35):
everybody else has been probably a more talented player right
on the list, but I think nobody has had an
impact on like the humanity of a greater group of
people than Bill Russell, right.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
Because what else outside of sports? And I guess entertainment,
which is like you know that's so loaded in and
of it. Yeah, but what other industry have we taken over.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
In that way? I don't tennis maybe, but even tennis,
but it's now give us the keys.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
They just go like it's a quality of players, but
it's not a quantity of players, And like I don't
think tennis will ever it's not going to ever reflect
back black culture in the way that like the NBA does.
That's what I mean, is Chanta Francis Tiafo though let's
go sire leone, baby be.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
On talk.
Speaker 4 (31:27):
From yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
Even the uh, even the way that Serena Williams continue
to have like TIFFs with them about her clothing, about
like her behavior on the court reflects how much it
remains a white sport while your greatest is a black woman.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
Same with same with golf, but basketball and football. It
was like, no, this is it's just it's you just
have to you just have to accept it.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
And and if Bill Russell is our greatest pioneer, I
was say Steph Curry is number two for I would
say for light skimped the same level for no step forward,
stop it, stop it. You're disgusting. I'm going to kill you.
Give me two hundred dollars. That was insane. I think
(32:17):
that has sound off in the comment has lifted.
Speaker 5 (32:22):
This is crazy, as you're saying, has lifted light eyes
stop it. Please sellow spirited men get out of you
to a beautiful, angelic high.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
This is that we may never come down from. Thank you,
Thank you, Wardale. Anyways, let's listen to another. Let's do
one more voice. Man.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
That was that was that was a crazy I liked it.
I like the audacity much like, because that's all I respect.
You know that about me?
Speaker 2 (32:54):
I made a bold choice. Yeah, and that's really what
I like in life. Let's take a break. When we
come back, we're gonna do one more voicemail, more David
more like. My mother told me we need to have
(33:29):
songs to get us away from drugs. Again. I agree.
We really cut that out. We cut that short. Yeah,
a little fun little about fitting All. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah,
getting off the smump, Get off that fin, yeah yeah yeah,
stop pitching that take get off that fin. Oh. I like, yeah, look,
(33:49):
I just thought of that. We gotta get somebody in here.
We gotta get somebody we gotta get We just make
an anti fitting All song, almost identical to that one.
Speaker 9 (34:00):
Yeah, yeah, I think it'd be awesome doing that thing
that turned into that weird smokey Robinson.
Speaker 12 (34:08):
That's exactly what I was going for. That's exactly what
I was going for. We got different plans. Never mind,
I thought we were in saying Okay, I don't think
we can work on this together.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
Okay, this next voicemail, I actually don't know what the
subject line means, but I'm excited because it either is
going to make no sense or the most sense.
Speaker 4 (34:37):
Ma mam was sold me, Hey, guys, love.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
It, okay, coming in hot. You don't like that. I
don't know how I feel about it. I think the
the passion at which this person saying and then directly
went back into their regular speaking voice, yeah, troubles me slightly. Okay.
I mean, but did you what you thought it was
going to be a hinged man? I think I wanted
(35:01):
him to be like that was crazy, right, and then
you say, hey, uh, he just sort of was like normal,
here we go, much like your Steph Curry take. I
loved it, Okay, let's go show.
Speaker 4 (35:14):
I'm calling it sober very much on my way to work,
wishing I was not sober. Uh. My mama told me
that about eighty five percent a coucie feels the same.
Pause is therefore, this.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Guy must be protected at all cords. This man is dangerous. Yeah,
and he's I don't even know if he's right or not.
I'm just saying that already puts everything in jeopardy.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Eighty five percent, that's a lot. Same, that's a lot.
That's you're really taking power away from Cucci. Yeah, from
the almighty dollar. It's certainly what I value most.
Speaker 4 (35:56):
Yeah, it is possible for things to actually be better
than the majority of pussy. I eat food, and I'm
sure you have all had an experience where you've ate
some food and it was so good that you thought
to yourself, this is better than some sex I have had.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
I don't know if this man has had coucie. Uh
is what I'm starting to say. Yeah, you think this
is all a long time. I think that maybe he's
not familiar with the heights that it can read. Yeah,
he's like me, I get pussy all the time. Watch
me leave a voicemail about it. Yeah, yeah, I like
(36:41):
mac and cheese. All right, Yeah, I mac and cheese
has gotten me sweaty, but I wasn't proud of it.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
I've certainly had a lot of meals where I go like, damn,
that shit, that shit was like sex, that shit felt whatever.
I think. Where I disagree is that if I'm ever
saying it's better than sex, it's because I just had sex.
Yeah you know what I mean, Like, I know more
sex is on the horizon. I'm not like eating mac
(37:10):
and cheese and then being like, you know what, I
don't need to fuck no more. I could just keep
eating this.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
It's also where you know the bar is It's like
if you say that was better than sex, you're not
saying it's better than the best sex you ever had.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
You're saying it's better than the worst sex you have. Yeah,
this is always always, Yeah, this is better than de giorno.
Yeah yeah, yeah, this is this is better than junior year.
I guess we knew what was going on, but this
is like, now we're talking now to his point, he's saying,
eighty five percent of it is just that is you know,
(37:46):
it's just this standard sort of like, uh, not bad,
not good.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
I didn't understand. I thought he said eighty five percent
of the couchies in the world felt the same.
Speaker 2 (37:57):
I think that is what he's saying.
Speaker 1 (38:00):
So I thought, okay, I thought what you were saying
is that he's saying eighty five percent.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
Of the reason koochie feels good. Oh no, no, no,
I don't think he's putting a measurement on pussy objectively, right.
I think he's saying, as a group, most pussy is
the same. Kouchie respectfully is the same. But every once
in a while you come across something miraculous. I would
(38:26):
like to also hear the numbers if that's how he
feels about booty. Oh interesting.
Speaker 4 (38:32):
And also for a lot of women who think they
have premium or top tier, that.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
From a bad place. Yeah, coming from a bad place.
I didn't like that. That was not good. I don't
the way that this is a villain. Yeah, I think
I think this. This felt like a peer reviewed science
at first, and now it's just the man who has
an issue with a few women who who made fun
(39:01):
of his body or yeah. Yeah, I get it, because
they'll eat you up sometimes. Yeah, and it hurts you.
I've been hurt before him. I just think leaving the
voicemail is not going to be the solution to the
pain that you're experiencing. But let's hear him. Yeah, let's
let him finish. Because that top tier, that premium, we
(39:22):
got to know what that means for you.
Speaker 4 (39:25):
They often are very incorrect, and usually men can tell
if a woman is in that top tier, not by
actually engaging in sexual intercourse, but looking at the aura
of men around her.
Speaker 2 (39:39):
Pause. This man is he's speaking from from underground. Yeah,
he's talking about auras. Yeah, what do you do? We
can smell it in the wind that she's got the
good pussy, because here's the thing, and yeah, this is
like bullshit. If there was ever something to believe in
(40:00):
the idea of like a diamond in the rough, it's kuchie.
If there was like a case for that idea of
things being you don't think there's just some great kouchie
at seven eleven that you just don't know about because
she just married some man and like like like that's
that's this is I don't like this guy. Also, I
we're my friend. Because you're saying I was wrong, I'll
(40:28):
say this. I think that this is such a cynical
perspective of the world and that kouchi, much like anything,
has the potential to grow and change and become whatever
it wants to be. If you have spent your life
with trash pussy, that can end today. You tomorrow can
wake up and say I got good kouchie called Docta
(40:53):
that's where they do that. It is gonna take some work,
but you can. You can face the world a good
Couchi person despite much like you can face the world
a good dick dude, even though you have a history
of leaving bad dick around town. I think that people
have the potential for growth and change, and I think
(41:13):
this sort of weird measurement of eighty five to fifteen
and you don't know you thought you had it, but
you don't have it presumes that Kouchi is strictly about
the uh, the orifice, right, And that's not what good
pussy is for me. No, it's the whole catalog. It's
everything about it. It's the entire vibe. Your whole experience
(41:34):
with that person is good pussy. And I don't put
a measurement on it strictly based off of the vagina
exactly because we love women and this guy does not.
But brother, we hope you keep listening. Yeah, no, keep
going in because you're driving the dialogue.
Speaker 13 (41:52):
We disagree with you, but that don't mean you got
to go home. You keep kicking it. You keep hanging
out and see if maybe you know you catch the
vibe we got going on over here. Yeah, you thought
you were playing Pete Nuncle. We play spades. That's you're
gonna have to figure out what we got going But
you're welcome to stay. Put that shitty deck away, But
congratulations learning a harder game Yep, for sure, harder.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
I hope that works out for you. Learning the more
complicated it, it's harder and way less people want to
play it. But I'm over here getting drunk, going new,
so we don't need to finish. I would like to finish.
Speaker 4 (42:29):
I e how men react to Rihanna who have been
with her or Erica Badu. We all know that they
have top tier without ever engaging. So just wanted to
share that theory with you. Guys. I don't know if
that's something you can work with. Yeah, here such a thing. Yeah,
we can work with pusy because pussy is eighty feeling
(42:51):
to say. Love y'all guys, take care.
Speaker 2 (42:54):
Damn damn. Hey, first of all, man, we love you too,
like a brother. Uh and and like a lot of brothers,
we think, brother, you need help. Yeah, brother, it's not
working good. You got to learn to love ladies beyond
the some of their parts. That was a blind cell. Yeah,
(43:15):
black insa. No, I knew what you do. I knew
it wasn't a word I was familiar with, but that
it had other words I recog. Yeah, it's usually just
me combined and two shits. Yeah, what you got going on?
Tell the people where they can find you.
Speaker 1 (43:32):
Cool guy jokes eighty seven on Instagram. My comedy special
Birth of a Nation is coming out on eight hundred
pound Gorilla on August ninth, so you can watch it
for YouTube for free. So everybody didn't want to buy
it from me, It's okay, I frik if you just
go watch it for free ten times hell yeah, September ninth.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
Did I say August ninth? It's September ninth. Either way, Yeah,
go see it.
Speaker 10 (43:55):
Do it.
Speaker 2 (43:55):
If it was September ninth, correct the first time, he
was right. And if it's not, bitch, you heard the change.
September ninth, you bitch, you bitch, you bitch, you're bitch.
You can follow me at Langston Kerman. I am going
on tour. I'm going to be hitting a bunch of
fucking cities on the Aspiring Deadbeat Dad Tour. In Aspiring
(44:17):
dead Beat Tour is what it's called. I'm very proud
of the work. Darryl Sharp, who has done a lot
of work for our show in the past, did the
art for it, and I'm really excited to be going
to your city September eighteenth. I'll be in Toronto one
night only, and then September nineteenth and twentieth. I'm going
to Philly, Baby, I want to hear y'all with your
(44:40):
weird accents pull up so we could talk shit about
your sports teams. Huh, that's all I really want to do.
Get a HOGI I'm gonna get a big old samwich
and I'm gonna talk about you your weird down. Yeah.
Come out Toronto, Philly September and then all the other
dates you can find on my website at Langston Kerman
(45:00):
dot com. Follow us at at my Mama told me
pod on everything social media like subscribe, rate review, Give
us a call at eight four four Little Moms, send
us your thoughts on all things at my Mama told
me at gmail dot com, we would love to hear
(45:20):
your voices, and most importantly, watch Azz Bye Bitch. I
got brun guides. Ain't nobody got time for that, my
mama told me. It is a production of Will Ferrell's
Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcast.
Speaker 1 (45:40):
Creet it and hosted by Langston Krekt, co hosted by
David Bori. Executive produced by Will Farrell, Hansni and Olivia Akilon.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
Co produced by Bee Wayne edited and engineered by Justin Koff,
music by Nick Chambers, artwork by Doegonkree. You can now
watch episodes My Mama Told Me on YouTube. Follow at
My Mama Told Me and subscribe to our channel