August 31, 2023 • 31 mins
Kris and Andi share their pathetic peeing accident stories and discuss the potential remedies- that only Kris will try.
To tell us what Your Vagina is saying to you; share an Everyday Vagina story or comment: Follow and DM My Vagina Said What on Instagram, @myvaginasaidwhat or email us at MyVaginaSaidWhat@gmail.com!
Please rate and review!
My Vagina Said What is Produced by MaeKr Media
Andi Gordon: Writer
Kris McDaniel: Editor
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Hey, I'm Chris, I'm Andy, and this is my vagina.
Said what we're back.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Welcome back every day, vaginas.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
We missed you, and I especially missed you. Chris.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I missed you too.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
We could not record for a couple of weeks because
our studio is in my basement and I was getting
a kitchen remodel done and it just was super loud,
super dusty, noisy.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Just a little bit of dust.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
I know our studio paid the price.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Not really, it wasn't that bad. And you cleaned it
looks beautiful. I did. I know you.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
You're welcome, but we had so much going on.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
We were texting the entire time about our vaginas because
so much.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Has happened in the last few weeks.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Dang, I never knew how much the vagina is controlling
my life until I couldn't talk to you about it.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
For two weeks. It's nuts.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
So, Chris, what is your vagina saying to you?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Do some kegels ho?
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Right?
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Today we are talking about peeing, Why we are peeing
so much, why can't our bodies hold it in?
Speaker 1 (01:20):
And what we are doing about it.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Frankly, honestly, I'm a little annoyed that we even have
to have this conversation. I mean, don't I go through
enough with my vagina.
Speaker 3 (01:29):
I know it is adding insult to injury, but there's
two distinct peeing issues that I'm dealing with. One is
that I have to pee all the time. Yes, And
two I pee myself involuntarily again all the time.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Oh yeah, I'll take your two issues and raise you
one stingy, burning pee hole.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Oh dang, that's just wrong. Well, if it makes you
feel better.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Issue one and two are now colliding in my life
and I have.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
No control over peeing whatsoever.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
First things first, let's start with peeing frequency. I pee
so much throughout the night. I literally check my watch
every time I go pee. It's like forty five minutes.
Every forty five minutes.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Holy cow.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Now, if I drink a lot of alcohol, I might
get two hours of sleep. We wait, why, I don't know.
I think it's because I'm dehydrated.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
It's probably because you're sleeping extra soundly.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
No, No, my pen sensation is so urgent. It's so
the sensation is so strong, there's no way I'm sleeping
through it. No matter how much alcohol I have.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
I feel like you just crept into my body and
mind because the same when I have to go to
the p it comes on all of a sudden where
it's like everything's fine, Bam. If I don't pee within
three seconds, I am going to It's urgent.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Always, it's always urgent.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
It's an emergency every time. So also my preeing frequency
is through the roof. It's gotten to the point now
where before I take trips with my kids, it's always
the did everyone go to the bathroom?
Speaker 1 (03:12):
And I do? I go usually.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
Twice, okay, to make sure that there's no possible way
that I'm going to ruin this trip.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
We'll be on the trip.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
And I'm like, hey, anybody have to go to the bathroom,
And they're like, Mom, we're literally not to the highway. Okay, okay.
I try to give myself a pep talk. Come on,
you can hang in five minutes?
Speaker 2 (03:33):
Maybe it Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
I watched the clock and like, I look at my mileage, okay,
make it five miles?
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Can you do six miles? And then it's hey, kids,
anyone have to go to the bathroom? No, Mom, you
just asked us.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
And then I'll.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Think, all right, well, here we go and I'll just
have to pull over, hey, just in case anyone has
to go, and they're like, Mom, just tell us you
have to go to the bathroom. It never stops. Also
through the middle of the night. It's I would say,
three times a night.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Okay, that's not too bad. Really well for me, every
like four to five times a night.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
You're probably never even making it into r EM.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
I think I go right into ri EM because I
dream excessively, Like I dream soon as I close my eyes,
you do, I do? Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
I don't think I dream really at all.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
I dream so badly.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
If I am dreaming, I think I'm just dreaming about
your nation, because that's.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
All I do.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
No, as soon as I close my eyes, I start dreaming. Oh,
I remember when we went to Philly and you had
to pee and we were on the turnpike, and so
we pulled over and then all three of us ending
up having to having to pee on the side of
the road.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Was that your first time peeing on the turnpike?
Speaker 4 (04:49):
No?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Oh, absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Okay, for those of you who have not yet conquered
this sphere, all you do is you open two doors,
right and you pee on inside.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Now, if you have a minivan like I do.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
What you do is you open up just the one
door and then you pee on the opposite side. So
the traffic coming towards you doesn't see you. Well, no,
they see you, but hopefully there's a barrier.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
But hopefully it's the traffic that's in your same lane
at least doesn't see you.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Okay. So I don't have a minivan, so I open
up both doors, the passenger and the backseat door, and
then I just pee in between them. Right, So I
feel and I feel totally protected. When I'm on the highway,
I do too.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
I have no stage fright. I will pee anywhere. It's
like that Doctor Seuss book with the green eggs and ham.
I'll pee in a parking lot, I'll pee on a highway.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
I'll be here, I'll be there. I'll pee anywhere. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I one of my biggest accomplishments in life. I was
driving from DC to New York and I was hell
bent on not stopping, and I had a water bottle
in my car.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
I rope stick while peeing in a water bottle. Oh
my god, and made it to my destination without pulling over.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
How did you aim into that little teeny hole.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Well, no, it wasn't. It wasn't like a water bottle
like from the grocery store. It was like a Gatorade
water bottle.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Okay, so it was still a little bit bigger.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
Yes, Oh, you just put your pea hole over it
and bear your weight down so that you know it
won't move.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
How do you even know? Like, honestly, I don't know
where my pea hole is. Like I know where my
pe hole is, but I don't really know where my
pea hole is, So I don't think I would be
able to like aim the bottle. Plus my pa comes
out like a fire hose, so it would be all
over the car.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Yeah, I was able to. I was able to do it.
I think the point is you got to sit it
down so if it comes out like a fire hose,
it just ricochets inside the bottle.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
I am so impressed here, I was bragging in the
group text about how I peed in a solo cup.
I was so proud.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I know, I know, but didn't I give you?
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Yeah, but you get mad props you beed in the
water bottle. I'm sorry, a Gatorade bottle.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
I didn't want to steal your shine. I did.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
I totally bragged in the group chat. Hey guys, I
just peeded asal cup in the car. It's so bad that, honestly,
I had stood outside of my car and had to
pee myself. That is, there's one place that I won't
go pee, and that's in a residential area with nothing
but houses.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
Well, that's understandable.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Well, I was trying to find a spot to pull
over and pop both doors open, but there were houses everywhere,
just lawns and houses and front porches. So I pulled
over to the side of the road and stood outside
of my car pissed all down my legs.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Stop.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Then I grabbed some extra coats and stuff out of
the back of the car, piled them in the driver's seat,
sat my wet ass down in the driver's seat. My
kids like, Mom, did you really just be yourself? Wait?
Speaker 1 (08:05):
See what do you pee? You just stood, stood up
and peed like you were in the ocean.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
I yeah, yes, yes, just like honestly, because I didn't
want to sit in the driver's seat in peace, I
just like stood on the side of the car and
I couldn't like squat because, like I said, I was
in front of people's houses.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
So I just stood there and pissed.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
I mean, I guess what other option did you have?
Speaker 2 (08:29):
None? Exactly, literally none. Could not hold it another second.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Well, on top of it, my peeing is now compromising
my professionalism. So I was in a really important meeting
last week with an attorney. It was our first time meeting,
and we're sitting there and I felt the urge to
go to the bathroom. And I thought, I'm not going
to be able to concentrate on what this person is
telling me unless I do this. So I said, excuse
(08:55):
me real quick, and I went to the bathroom and
I was back in thirty seconds because there's nothing in there, right,
there's nothing in there, so I really.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Nothing in where like when I pee, it's barely anything.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
It's clear, mind is clear, but it feels like there's
five gallons.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
Oh yeah, easy.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
A side note.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
At the lawyer office, the bathroom toilet seat was one
of those toilet seats that is made up of real
seashells covered in like a poly or athane.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
That sounds gross, so weird. And then there was carpet
on the floor even grocer I've seen that before. The
seashell I know's it just doesn't look clean. I know
it's so weird.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
But anyway, I jumped off and went back in, and
she knew. I just was like an urgent peace situation
because I was back within thirty seconds.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Okay, but why were you embarrassed by it?
Speaker 1 (09:47):
I don't know. Hold it, lady, you're in the You're
in an important meeting.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
No big deal. Everyone pease? Okay, yeah, everyone peas? So
why were you embarrassed? Like I have to go pee?
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Because I feel like a lady should be able to
say I can sit here for an hour, not a
lady that's have four kids?
Speaker 2 (10:06):
All right?
Speaker 1 (10:06):
True? You're making me feel better about that?
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Yeah? Absolutely, I bet you. She had the pee too,
She just didn't want to interrupt the meeting.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
See, now, if we could just be open with ourselves
and let's say, excuse me, do you want to take
a bathroom break?
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Right break? I love bathroom breaks.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Wouldn't that be so liberating to just say the problem
that each other are experiencing that we're not talking about.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Well, you and I do it all the time. We
can't get through a whole episode, but I'll take in
a pee break.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That is actually completely true. Every episode. We have to
pause about three times to go to the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
So issue number two is bladder control. Right, Yes, at
what age did your bladder start to let loose? All right?
Speaker 1 (10:52):
I don't know. I remember I was playing on my
soccer team and there was a woman who had had
kids that I was playing with, and she would comment about, oh,
I just peed myself, Oh I just leaked. And I
used to think, ew, lady, like, that's disgusting.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
And little did I realize she was foreshadowing my future.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
And that's all I do.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
So I would say that after my first pregnancy, it
became an issue of no going on the trampoline. Then
after the second pregnancy, it was all right, if you
have to sneeze, you have to cross your legs and
clench your thighs together. And then by the third pregnancy,
it was okay, you can't step off the sidewalk curve.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
I love that you have like documented like after this step,
after this child, this happened.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
I literally have no idea. All I know is one
day I couldn't hold it anymore. I don't know if
it was after the second kid, or the third kid,
or the fourth kid. All I know is I always
have to pee, and I cannot hold it. Even though
I've literally pei twenty minutes ago. It feels like I
haven't peed in four hours, and god forbid, I'm driving
(12:08):
in the rain. Like when I have to stop at
all these gas stations. I can tell you which gas
stations have the cleanest bathrooms because I am always popping
at them.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
So it's like peeing with the faucetum for you.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
All the time. That's all I do is pee. Speaking
of I think I have to pee. I do too,
So let's take a pee break, Let's pay some bills.
We'll be right back. Stick with us.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
I'll race you to the bathroom be first. Thanks for
(12:57):
sticking with us.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
Hopefully it means that you are also constantly peeing yourself.
I guess, yeah, as other women, Although now that I
think about it, I don't know if my mom peas
herself all the time.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
I don't think my mom has any peeing issues.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Yeah, but she's also a very disciplined person. She's probably
trained her bladder, trained her bladder. Do you know what
that is?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Now?
Speaker 3 (13:19):
Okay, So there's this idea that if you have an
overactive bladder, then you can track how often do you
go to the bathroom each day and what you do
is you try to extend that amount by fifteen minutes
each time.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
I could really use something like that.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
You would take that very seriously. I can picture it.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Oh yeah, I actually thought that just doing cageles is
what helped you with your bladder control.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Oh. Just you saying cagles makes me want a puke.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
I hate the feeling inside my body when I'm doing cagels.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
I'm doing them right now and I'm cringing. It's like
nails on a chalkboard.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
To me, why are you doing them?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Because you said cagles and I never do them, and
I feel like I'm not living up to my full potential.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Well, speaking of cagles, we received a DM from an
everyday vagina. I'd love to share with you, she says,
Chris and Andy, I want to share with you some
of the best advice I ever received from a coworker,
the suggestion that women should use cagels cagle balls once
a week for one hour.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
Oh, I have never done a kegball, have you?
Speaker 2 (14:34):
Yes, I have cagleballs.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Okay, tell me about it.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Okay. So it's a rubber ball with like a ball
bearing or like a bell, like inside.
Speaker 1 (14:42):
Like a bell.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Well, it does kind of make like a ting sound.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
No way that you can audibly hear it.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
I can audibly hear it. And when they're inside you
almost worry that someone else can hear them. But anyway,
they're weighted, and so you put them in side, and
the weight and the distribution of the weight is supposed
to have your muscles contract around them so that your
body is naturally doing kegles? Does it?
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Did you feel your body contracting?
Speaker 2 (15:12):
No? Not really? Oh okay, honestly, I didn't really feel
like it was doing anything. But I've tried a bunch
of times.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
So how do you get it out?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It's on a string. It looks like large anal beads.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
I don't even know what an anal bead looks like.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
You, poor poor thing.
Speaker 1 (15:31):
So it's on a string like a tampon.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
It's on a string like an anal ball.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
I don't know what that means.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
It's a ball. It's like a rubber, like a sperm.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
It looks like a sperm.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Oh my god, I'm gonna have to draw you a
freaking picture, all right, or I'm gonna pull up anal
beads on Google, and you can look at anal beads
on Google.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Okay, so we'll report back our next show.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
I don't know what a beds are, but you pull
the string, pull the string and they come right out.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Do you do cagols?
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Yes, I do do cagles. I actually have to do them.
Oh why a few years back? I would say it
was maybe after the second kid. Okay. I had this
issue where it felt like I had a urinary tract infection.
It was that type of a pain in my lower area, okay,
(16:26):
in my vagina area. I wasn't sure what it was.
I went to the.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Doctor her So it stung to pee, It's.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Stung to pee, and it hurt throughout the day like
I was in constant pine. They were giving me pain
killers and they did take a test and no, I
did not have a bladder infection. They couldn't figure out
what was wrong. They sent me to seven different doctors,
even an anal rectal specialist.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
You're fast forwarding through that. So you went to seven doctors.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Seven doctors?
Speaker 1 (16:57):
What's an anal rectal special.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Jay are anal rectal specialists? What did?
Speaker 1 (17:05):
What was that appointment?
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Like? It was terrible it was worse than getting in
the stirrups. You literally pull your pants down and bend
over a table and they look at your butt.
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Do they like spread your butt cheeks?
Speaker 2 (17:17):
I don't remember if he specifically.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Probably you were like doing the downward dog yoga position
on the table with the doctor staring at your butt.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
It wasn't the downward dog position. I think I was
just like laying over the table flat and my knees
were bent.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Okay, barf, who wants to do that for their job?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I agree? I agree? And it was it was almost
it was kind of humiliating.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Yeah, I can understand why.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
And he said, your hemorrhoids aren't significant enough to be
causing the amount of pain that you're in. Okay, So
he was searching. So I went to another doctor and
eventually they sent me into a physical therapist and she
took this Bible reader looking mechanism with the wire attached
to a machine and it would vibrate and she would
(18:05):
stick it inside and I was to do keggles around
it and the machine would measure my keggles.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Wait, wait, is this called a vaginal massage?
Speaker 2 (18:16):
I don't know if that's what it's called. But she
did massage my butt cheek too.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Oh it was Tika.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Two for what it was? Well, okay, so she said
I had broken my leg a few years before, and
she said that my body was off center and it
was causing my per neum to.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Spasmy Okay, first of all, what's a pandeum?
Speaker 2 (18:42):
It is the space between both holes, what holes, the
you know, the butthole and the vagina hole.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
The taint.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I don't know if that's called it. I always thought
that taint was like the butthole.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
No, I thought the taint was between your vage hole
and your.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
All right, every day vagina? Is what is the taint?
Or maybe we should just look it up on Google.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
Or depend on you. We don't believe Google. But I
don't know if that's the weirdest part of this story,
because also, are you trying to tell me that you
broke your ankle and your vagina paid the price?
Speaker 2 (19:19):
My vagina paid the price from my broken angle because
the pain was real and it was spasming. The muscle
was was spasoming, and the only thing that gets it
to stop hurting is cagels. So every once in a
while I'll start to feel that uncomfortable pain again, and
I'll just do a bunch of cagles. And I'm pretty
(19:41):
lazy about it, so I only do them when I
feel pain.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
So the kegles helped your pain, Yes? Did it help
you peeing yourself?
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Absolutely not. I still pee myself. I just pee myself
last week. Last week, Oh my god, I had literally
just peid twenty minutes beforehand. I'm rushing home with my daughter.
I had to leave her in the car, run in
the house, and I'm like, oh shit, I'm peeing myself again.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Okay, but this is what I'm trying to explain.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
If you're only peeing yourself once a week, I pee
myself every day.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
Like full fledged pee. I don't mean tinkle, No, I
like a dribble. Oh that's not peeing yourself, that's just
a I pee that all the time. Oh, every time
I have to pee, a little comes out. If I sneeze,
a little comes out. God forbid, I chuckle too hard,
A little comes out. I wear pea pats. As a
(20:37):
matter of fact, since you were talking about this earlier,
I have something for you.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
Oh snap, it's a product. You know how much Chris
loves products.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
You know me, So these are always discreet.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Let me see, let me see. Okay, so she is
just handing me a ba a bag of Always the
Street boutique, and they kind of have a lacy look
to them.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Yes, they're sexy.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
You wear these?
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I wear those just about every day.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Okay, they're not sexy.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Ah, all right, they're not sexy, but they're pea pads.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
What do you mean, so every day you put this on?
Speaker 2 (21:14):
I do because I hate wet panties. How often a
day do you change your panties? Several times a day? Well,
if you wear one of those, you won't have to.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
But then doesn't it just make you wet and you're
sitting in a wet pad?
Speaker 2 (21:27):
No, it's always. So it's got like that secret layered
thing going on.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
All right, we'll have to try it, all right, Well,
I'm going to try it before our next episode. But
I also think it's super weird that you wear a
peapad every.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Day, and I'm not embarrassed at all. I tell my
husband these are not pads. I'm not on my period,
so we can have sex.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
How come you're not embarrassed about it?
Speaker 2 (21:46):
I don't know. I don't know. For some reason, just
like it's a peapad I tinkle when I laugh.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
I'm pretty sure that I'll be wearing depends when I'm older.
So when I was a kid, I had a friend
and we just did weird stuff together and we wanted
to try out depends. So we went to the store.
We walked down to the store from her house.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Okay, wait, you wanted to try why?
Speaker 1 (22:13):
I don't know. I just wanted to see if they
could actually work.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
And I was thinking depends, like, why are these people
peeing themselves?
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Little?
Speaker 1 (22:22):
See that's karma.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Yeah, Karma came back and said, you laughed, and now
I'm gonna plague you.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
But we went to the store. We bought the depends,
and we stored up as much pea as our little
bodies could hold.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
Oh my god, how old are you?
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I'm gonna say, twelve?
Speaker 2 (22:44):
Why. I still don't get why, Like I just it
never and I've seen the commercials. I mean I probably
saw them when I was twelve, but it never occurred
to me the hey, let's try these depends diverts.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
We had a lot of weird stuff this friend.
Speaker 3 (22:59):
We actually had a piece of toilet paper strip that
we kept in her bathroom. She had her own bathroom
and there was a strip of toilet paper and we
would put our boogers on it.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
Oh, that is so disgusting, and I hate the B word.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
We say monsters in my house. You have a monster
in your nose with.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
All of your sexual liberation, and boogers send you over
the edge.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
And potty talk. I think it's I think it's the
poo and the farting and the monsters. I'm not going
to say the B word.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Well, anyway, we went and we got the depends.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Okay, this is so embarrassing.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
We stored up all the pea we could muster, and
then we went and we got in her tub and
we both peede at the same time in standing in
her tub in our depends.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
You have to hear them, and let me tell you,
they held a lot.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
It wasn't until I got older that I realized.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
I think they're for leaks, not for like a diaper,
like a baby leaks.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
You don't think that, aren't they for like pooh or something.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
No, they're just for if you It's like a pea
pad version, the old school pea pad version.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Okay, I always thought it depends was like a diaper.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
It is a diaper. It is like a full on diaper.
But I don't think you're supposed to like it.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
It did it leak?
Speaker 1 (24:22):
No, wow, held strong.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
I have to know you. These are not for full
on peeing yourself. I won't.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
That was a freaking weird thing to do.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
It was a very weird thing to do. These are
for your daily tinkles, So don't go PN and the
damn always discreet.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
All right, all right, all right, I'll try to hold
myself back.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
Okay, so I've grown since it depends incident, but I
feel like you're always going to hold that one against me.
Now I am, so I will use it though when
I'm taking a walk.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
So you know how I mentioned how my two problems
are colliding. So last week I took a walk.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Okay, as I'm.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
Leaving for the walk, I go to the bathroom like
twice right before I leave, and on the walk, I
get about I don't know, two minutes into the walk
and I took a step off a curb and I tinkled,
as you would say myself.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
And then within another ten minutes again another little tinkle,
and I am having to go to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
So bad. There was a church that's not too far
from me, and they had a dumpster, so I went
and hit around the dumpster and Peede continued walking, continued tinkling,
and then found myself in a residential area where I
again had to get in a shady dark spot and
pee again.
Speaker 3 (25:52):
I can't get away from it. It was a thirty
minute walk. I came home because I felt so disgusting.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
And your panties were wet because you didn't have on
a pee pad.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
I didn't know I was supposed to wear a pea pad.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
They help, They're really nice.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
Fine, I'm gonna use it.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Okay, I'm gonna try it. Are you gonna try caggles? No, Well,
you already said you were trying them, so just keep
trying them. Right.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
I just did two right now, So that's got to
cover me for at least a year. Yeah. So I
met this woman.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
I was talking to her about all my peen because
she runs, and I think, how do you possibly run?
I literally can't walk without peeing. And she told me
that she got a bladder lift.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
Oh wow, So when she had her.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
Second kid, they lifted her bladder at the same.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
Time wit she had like a Syrian section.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
I guess so. And at that time they lifted her bladder.
She said, best decision she's ever made in her life.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
Really, yep.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
And I googled bladderlift and it looked like a fist
of flesh.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
Popping out of a vagina, and I thought, that doesn't
feel authentic for me.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
And I'm just scared because I'm thinking.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
The peeing is already so bad, right, and I'm clearly
too lazy for keegels, and it.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Just irks me. So what does my future hold?
Speaker 2 (27:12):
It's not gonna be good bladderlift. You're gonna get a
bladder lift?
Speaker 1 (27:17):
No, I'm not going to. I'm saying it's looked freaky,
I know.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
But if you're already tinkling and peeing now, it is
just gonna get worse. We're getting older.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
What are you gonna do about yours?
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Oh man, I'm just gonna keep up with the kegls.
Oh yeah, I'll just keep doing cagles when I.
Speaker 3 (27:36):
Don't think it's working though, because you're wearing a peap
pet every day, so what?
Speaker 2 (27:39):
And I'm lazy?
Speaker 3 (27:42):
And now I'm just totally freaked out because if it's
already bad, now I can't even imagine what this situation
looks like in five years, ten years.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Yeah, you should be scared, because my situation just keeps
getting worse. Two weeks ago, my pea hole was stressing
me out. I had a kidney stone.
Speaker 1 (28:02):
I've never had a kidney stone.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
Nor had I I didn't even know what it was.
All I know is I had this pain in my stomach.
I thought that it was indigestion. I was chugging pepto
and I went to the er and they said, you
passed the huge kidney stone. Your kidney's bruised, and you
have another one in there that we need to blast.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Oh my gosh, Chris.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I know, I know, I'm so old. Anyway, So I
go in and I get my They go up my
pea hole and they blast the kidney stone and pull
the pieces out. Then they put about an eight inch
stick in my kidney and bladder. Yes, and they said
it wasn't going to be painful. Every time I peed,
(28:48):
it burned every time. And then and then the medicine
that they gave me to relax my bladder turn my
pea pumpkin orange sick. It was sick, and it was
super painful, and they wanted the stint to stay in
for like a whole month, but I made him take
it out after a week.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Is that dangerous?
Speaker 2 (29:08):
What leaving it in for a month or taking it
out in a week taking it out in a week.
I think they left it in so that any small
additional stones could pass. But like I said, it hurt
every time I peece, so I just and I could
feel it. So I went in after a week and
I got them to take it out, and I felt tempully.
I felt it coming out of my kidney. They went
(29:28):
up my pea hole. Oh oh it was It was
just a number pea hole. Yeah. So I go in
there and I lay on this table and I spread
my legs open, and she takes this cue tip with
this gel on it and puts it in my pea
hole because it's supposed to numb it. And I'm like,
keep going, go deeper. Put the gel in as far
(29:49):
go because I did not want to feel the pain
of that stint coming out. And then so she put
it up in there and she numbed it and it
came out relatively quickly. I could feel it coming out
of my kidney. It was really gross. And painful, but
my pea hole didn't burn until the anesthetic wore off,
(30:10):
and then my pea hole was hurting and my kidney
was hurting for like four days. Dang, that's what I'm
talking about. And then I had to get up by
the cruel world. And then I'm getting up every forty
five minutes to pee with a burning peele torture.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Well, this has been a buzzkill. Sorry, every day vaginas,
please help us with our peace situation. Please tell us
besides KALs what we can do or a bladderliss oh barf.
It's the blind leading the blind around here. Please help
us figure out what to do, or let's help each
(30:50):
other figure out. Yes, our solution is together, we could
start a whole community around peeing support ah.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
Every day vagina is pe posse ha ha. Okay. Well,
thank you for listening to what our vaginas are saying.
For questions, comments, or to let us know what your
vagina is saying, email us at my vagina Said What
at gmail dot com DM and follow us on Instagram
and Facebook at hashtag my vagina said what. Listen, subscribe
(31:21):
and rate us on Seneca Women iHeartRadio or wherever you listen.
Speaker 1 (31:26):
Our vagina knowledge is based solely on our experience as
vagina owners. Please see your doctor if you have any
concerns about your vagina.
Speaker 4 (31:34):
What
Hey, I'm Chris, I'm Andy, and this is my vagina.
Said what we're back.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Welcome back every day, vaginas.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
We missed you, and I especially missed you. Chris.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I missed you too.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
We could not record for a couple of weeks because
our studio is in my basement and I was getting
a kitchen remodel done and it just was super loud,
super dusty, noisy.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Just a little bit of dust.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
I know our studio paid the price.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Not really, it wasn't that bad. And you cleaned it
looks beautiful. I did. I know you.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
You're welcome, but we had so much going on.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
We were texting the entire time about our vaginas because
so much.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Has happened in the last few weeks.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Dang, I never knew how much the vagina is controlling
my life until I couldn't talk to you about it.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
For two weeks. It's nuts.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
So, Chris, what is your vagina saying to you?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Do some kegels ho?
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Right?
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Today we are talking about peeing, Why we are peeing
so much, why can't our bodies hold it in?
Speaker 1 (01:20):
And what we are doing about it.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Frankly, honestly, I'm a little annoyed that we even have
to have this conversation. I mean, don't I go through
enough with my vagina.
Speaker 3 (01:29):
I know it is adding insult to injury, but there's
two distinct peeing issues that I'm dealing with. One is
that I have to pee all the time. Yes, And
two I pee myself involuntarily again all the time.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Oh yeah, I'll take your two issues and raise you
one stingy, burning pee hole.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Oh dang, that's just wrong. Well, if it makes you
feel better.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Issue one and two are now colliding in my life
and I have.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
No control over peeing whatsoever.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
First things first, let's start with peeing frequency. I pee
so much throughout the night. I literally check my watch
every time I go pee. It's like forty five minutes.
Every forty five minutes.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Holy cow.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Now, if I drink a lot of alcohol, I might
get two hours of sleep. We wait, why, I don't know.
I think it's because I'm dehydrated.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
It's probably because you're sleeping extra soundly.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
No, No, my pen sensation is so urgent. It's so
the sensation is so strong, there's no way I'm sleeping
through it. No matter how much alcohol I have.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
I feel like you just crept into my body and
mind because the same when I have to go to
the p it comes on all of a sudden where
it's like everything's fine, Bam. If I don't pee within
three seconds, I am going to It's urgent.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Always, it's always urgent.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
It's an emergency every time. So also my preeing frequency
is through the roof. It's gotten to the point now
where before I take trips with my kids, it's always
the did everyone go to the bathroom?
Speaker 1 (03:12):
And I do? I go usually.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
Twice, okay, to make sure that there's no possible way
that I'm going to ruin this trip.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
We'll be on the trip.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
And I'm like, hey, anybody have to go to the bathroom,
And they're like, Mom, we're literally not to the highway. Okay, okay.
I try to give myself a pep talk. Come on,
you can hang in five minutes?
Speaker 2 (03:33):
Maybe it Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
I watched the clock and like, I look at my mileage, okay,
make it five miles?
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Can you do six miles? And then it's hey, kids,
anyone have to go to the bathroom? No, Mom, you
just asked us.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
And then I'll.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Think, all right, well, here we go and I'll just
have to pull over, hey, just in case anyone has
to go, and they're like, Mom, just tell us you
have to go to the bathroom. It never stops. Also
through the middle of the night. It's I would say,
three times a night.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Okay, that's not too bad. Really well for me, every
like four to five times a night.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
You're probably never even making it into r EM.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
I think I go right into ri EM because I
dream excessively, Like I dream soon as I close my eyes,
you do, I do? Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
I don't think I dream really at all.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
I dream so badly.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
If I am dreaming, I think I'm just dreaming about
your nation, because that's.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
All I do.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
No, as soon as I close my eyes, I start dreaming. Oh,
I remember when we went to Philly and you had
to pee and we were on the turnpike, and so
we pulled over and then all three of us ending
up having to having to pee on the side of
the road.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Was that your first time peeing on the turnpike?
Speaker 4 (04:49):
No?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Oh, absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Okay, for those of you who have not yet conquered
this sphere, all you do is you open two doors,
right and you pee on inside.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Now, if you have a minivan like I do.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
What you do is you open up just the one
door and then you pee on the opposite side. So
the traffic coming towards you doesn't see you. Well, no,
they see you, but hopefully there's a barrier.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
But hopefully it's the traffic that's in your same lane
at least doesn't see you.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Okay. So I don't have a minivan, so I open
up both doors, the passenger and the backseat door, and
then I just pee in between them. Right, So I
feel and I feel totally protected. When I'm on the highway,
I do too.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
I have no stage fright. I will pee anywhere. It's
like that Doctor Seuss book with the green eggs and ham.
I'll pee in a parking lot, I'll pee on a highway.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
I'll be here, I'll be there. I'll pee anywhere. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I one of my biggest accomplishments in life. I was
driving from DC to New York and I was hell
bent on not stopping, and I had a water bottle
in my car.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
I rope stick while peeing in a water bottle. Oh
my god, and made it to my destination without pulling over.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
How did you aim into that little teeny hole.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Well, no, it wasn't. It wasn't like a water bottle
like from the grocery store. It was like a Gatorade
water bottle.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Okay, so it was still a little bit bigger.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
Yes, Oh, you just put your pea hole over it
and bear your weight down so that you know it
won't move.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
How do you even know? Like, honestly, I don't know
where my pea hole is. Like I know where my
pe hole is, but I don't really know where my
pea hole is, So I don't think I would be
able to like aim the bottle. Plus my pa comes
out like a fire hose, so it would be all
over the car.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Yeah, I was able to. I was able to do it.
I think the point is you got to sit it
down so if it comes out like a fire hose,
it just ricochets inside the bottle.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
I am so impressed here, I was bragging in the
group text about how I peed in a solo cup.
I was so proud.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I know, I know, but didn't I give you?
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Yeah, but you get mad props you beed in the
water bottle. I'm sorry, a Gatorade bottle.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
I didn't want to steal your shine. I did.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
I totally bragged in the group chat. Hey guys, I
just peeded asal cup in the car. It's so bad that, honestly,
I had stood outside of my car and had to
pee myself. That is, there's one place that I won't
go pee, and that's in a residential area with nothing
but houses.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
Well, that's understandable.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Well, I was trying to find a spot to pull
over and pop both doors open, but there were houses everywhere,
just lawns and houses and front porches. So I pulled
over to the side of the road and stood outside
of my car pissed all down my legs.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Stop.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Then I grabbed some extra coats and stuff out of
the back of the car, piled them in the driver's seat,
sat my wet ass down in the driver's seat. My
kids like, Mom, did you really just be yourself? Wait?
Speaker 1 (08:05):
See what do you pee? You just stood, stood up
and peed like you were in the ocean.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
I yeah, yes, yes, just like honestly, because I didn't
want to sit in the driver's seat in peace, I
just like stood on the side of the car and
I couldn't like squat because, like I said, I was
in front of people's houses.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
So I just stood there and pissed.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
I mean, I guess what other option did you have?
Speaker 2 (08:29):
None? Exactly, literally none. Could not hold it another second.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Well, on top of it, my peeing is now compromising
my professionalism. So I was in a really important meeting
last week with an attorney. It was our first time meeting,
and we're sitting there and I felt the urge to
go to the bathroom. And I thought, I'm not going
to be able to concentrate on what this person is
telling me unless I do this. So I said, excuse
(08:55):
me real quick, and I went to the bathroom and
I was back in thirty seconds because there's nothing in there, right,
there's nothing in there, so I really.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Nothing in where like when I pee, it's barely anything.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
It's clear, mind is clear, but it feels like there's
five gallons.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
Oh yeah, easy.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
A side note.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
At the lawyer office, the bathroom toilet seat was one
of those toilet seats that is made up of real
seashells covered in like a poly or athane.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
That sounds gross, so weird. And then there was carpet
on the floor even grocer I've seen that before. The
seashell I know's it just doesn't look clean. I know
it's so weird.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
But anyway, I jumped off and went back in, and
she knew. I just was like an urgent peace situation
because I was back within thirty seconds.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Okay, but why were you embarrassed by it?
Speaker 1 (09:47):
I don't know. Hold it, lady, you're in the You're
in an important meeting.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
No big deal. Everyone pease? Okay, yeah, everyone peas? So
why were you embarrassed? Like I have to go pee?
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Because I feel like a lady should be able to
say I can sit here for an hour, not a
lady that's have four kids?
Speaker 2 (10:06):
All right?
Speaker 1 (10:06):
True? You're making me feel better about that?
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Yeah? Absolutely, I bet you. She had the pee too,
She just didn't want to interrupt the meeting.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
See, now, if we could just be open with ourselves
and let's say, excuse me, do you want to take
a bathroom break?
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Right break? I love bathroom breaks.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Wouldn't that be so liberating to just say the problem
that each other are experiencing that we're not talking about.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Well, you and I do it all the time. We
can't get through a whole episode, but I'll take in
a pee break.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That is actually completely true. Every episode. We have to
pause about three times to go to the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
So issue number two is bladder control. Right, Yes, at
what age did your bladder start to let loose? All right?
Speaker 1 (10:52):
I don't know. I remember I was playing on my
soccer team and there was a woman who had had
kids that I was playing with, and she would comment about, oh,
I just peed myself, Oh I just leaked. And I
used to think, ew, lady, like, that's disgusting.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
And little did I realize she was foreshadowing my future.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
And that's all I do.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
So I would say that after my first pregnancy, it
became an issue of no going on the trampoline. Then
after the second pregnancy, it was all right, if you
have to sneeze, you have to cross your legs and
clench your thighs together. And then by the third pregnancy,
it was okay, you can't step off the sidewalk curve.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
I love that you have like documented like after this step,
after this child, this happened.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
I literally have no idea. All I know is one
day I couldn't hold it anymore. I don't know if
it was after the second kid, or the third kid,
or the fourth kid. All I know is I always
have to pee, and I cannot hold it. Even though
I've literally pei twenty minutes ago. It feels like I
haven't peed in four hours, and god forbid, I'm driving
(12:08):
in the rain. Like when I have to stop at
all these gas stations. I can tell you which gas
stations have the cleanest bathrooms because I am always popping
at them.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
So it's like peeing with the faucetum for you.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
All the time. That's all I do is pee. Speaking
of I think I have to pee. I do too,
So let's take a pee break, Let's pay some bills.
We'll be right back. Stick with us.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
I'll race you to the bathroom be first. Thanks for
(12:57):
sticking with us.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
Hopefully it means that you are also constantly peeing yourself.
I guess, yeah, as other women, Although now that I
think about it, I don't know if my mom peas
herself all the time.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
I don't think my mom has any peeing issues.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Yeah, but she's also a very disciplined person. She's probably
trained her bladder, trained her bladder. Do you know what
that is?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Now?
Speaker 3 (13:19):
Okay, So there's this idea that if you have an
overactive bladder, then you can track how often do you
go to the bathroom each day and what you do
is you try to extend that amount by fifteen minutes
each time.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
I could really use something like that.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
You would take that very seriously. I can picture it.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Oh yeah, I actually thought that just doing cageles is
what helped you with your bladder control.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Oh. Just you saying cagles makes me want a puke.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
I hate the feeling inside my body when I'm doing cagels.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
I'm doing them right now and I'm cringing. It's like
nails on a chalkboard.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
To me, why are you doing them?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Because you said cagles and I never do them, and
I feel like I'm not living up to my full potential.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Well, speaking of cagles, we received a DM from an
everyday vagina. I'd love to share with you, she says,
Chris and Andy, I want to share with you some
of the best advice I ever received from a coworker,
the suggestion that women should use cagels cagle balls once
a week for one hour.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
Oh, I have never done a kegball, have you?
Speaker 2 (14:34):
Yes, I have cagleballs.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Okay, tell me about it.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Okay. So it's a rubber ball with like a ball
bearing or like a bell, like inside.
Speaker 1 (14:42):
Like a bell.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Well, it does kind of make like a ting sound.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
No way that you can audibly hear it.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
I can audibly hear it. And when they're inside you
almost worry that someone else can hear them. But anyway,
they're weighted, and so you put them in side, and
the weight and the distribution of the weight is supposed
to have your muscles contract around them so that your
body is naturally doing kegles? Does it?
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Did you feel your body contracting?
Speaker 2 (15:12):
No? Not really? Oh okay, honestly, I didn't really feel
like it was doing anything. But I've tried a bunch
of times.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
So how do you get it out?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It's on a string. It looks like large anal beads.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
I don't even know what an anal bead looks like.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
You, poor poor thing.
Speaker 1 (15:31):
So it's on a string like a tampon.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
It's on a string like an anal ball.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
I don't know what that means.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
It's a ball. It's like a rubber, like a sperm.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
It looks like a sperm.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Oh my god, I'm gonna have to draw you a
freaking picture, all right, or I'm gonna pull up anal
beads on Google, and you can look at anal beads
on Google.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Okay, so we'll report back our next show.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
I don't know what a beds are, but you pull
the string, pull the string and they come right out.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Do you do cagols?
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Yes, I do do cagles. I actually have to do them.
Oh why a few years back? I would say it
was maybe after the second kid. Okay. I had this
issue where it felt like I had a urinary tract infection.
It was that type of a pain in my lower area, okay,
(16:26):
in my vagina area. I wasn't sure what it was.
I went to the.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Doctor her So it stung to pee, It's.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Stung to pee, and it hurt throughout the day like
I was in constant pine. They were giving me pain
killers and they did take a test and no, I
did not have a bladder infection. They couldn't figure out
what was wrong. They sent me to seven different doctors,
even an anal rectal specialist.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
You're fast forwarding through that. So you went to seven doctors.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Seven doctors?
Speaker 1 (16:57):
What's an anal rectal special.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Jay are anal rectal specialists? What did?
Speaker 1 (17:05):
What was that appointment?
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Like? It was terrible it was worse than getting in
the stirrups. You literally pull your pants down and bend
over a table and they look at your butt.
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Do they like spread your butt cheeks?
Speaker 2 (17:17):
I don't remember if he specifically.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Probably you were like doing the downward dog yoga position
on the table with the doctor staring at your butt.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
It wasn't the downward dog position. I think I was
just like laying over the table flat and my knees
were bent.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Okay, barf, who wants to do that for their job?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I agree? I agree? And it was it was almost
it was kind of humiliating.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Yeah, I can understand why.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
And he said, your hemorrhoids aren't significant enough to be
causing the amount of pain that you're in. Okay, So
he was searching. So I went to another doctor and
eventually they sent me into a physical therapist and she
took this Bible reader looking mechanism with the wire attached
to a machine and it would vibrate and she would
(18:05):
stick it inside and I was to do keggles around
it and the machine would measure my keggles.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Wait, wait, is this called a vaginal massage?
Speaker 2 (18:16):
I don't know if that's what it's called. But she
did massage my butt cheek too.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Oh it was Tika.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Two for what it was? Well, okay, so she said
I had broken my leg a few years before, and
she said that my body was off center and it
was causing my per neum to.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Spasmy Okay, first of all, what's a pandeum?
Speaker 2 (18:42):
It is the space between both holes, what holes, the
you know, the butthole and the vagina hole.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
The taint.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I don't know if that's called it. I always thought
that taint was like the butthole.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
No, I thought the taint was between your vage hole
and your.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
All right, every day vagina? Is what is the taint?
Or maybe we should just look it up on Google.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
Or depend on you. We don't believe Google. But I
don't know if that's the weirdest part of this story,
because also, are you trying to tell me that you
broke your ankle and your vagina paid the price?
Speaker 2 (19:19):
My vagina paid the price from my broken angle because
the pain was real and it was spasming. The muscle
was was spasoming, and the only thing that gets it
to stop hurting is cagels. So every once in a
while I'll start to feel that uncomfortable pain again, and
I'll just do a bunch of cagles. And I'm pretty
(19:41):
lazy about it, so I only do them when I
feel pain.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
So the kegles helped your pain, Yes? Did it help
you peeing yourself?
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Absolutely not. I still pee myself. I just pee myself
last week. Last week, Oh my god, I had literally
just peid twenty minutes beforehand. I'm rushing home with my daughter.
I had to leave her in the car, run in
the house, and I'm like, oh shit, I'm peeing myself again.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Okay, but this is what I'm trying to explain.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
If you're only peeing yourself once a week, I pee
myself every day.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
Like full fledged pee. I don't mean tinkle, No, I
like a dribble. Oh that's not peeing yourself, that's just
a I pee that all the time. Oh, every time
I have to pee, a little comes out. If I sneeze,
a little comes out. God forbid, I chuckle too hard,
A little comes out. I wear pea pats. As a
(20:37):
matter of fact, since you were talking about this earlier,
I have something for you.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
Oh snap, it's a product. You know how much Chris
loves products.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
You know me, So these are always discreet.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Let me see, let me see. Okay, so she is
just handing me a ba a bag of Always the
Street boutique, and they kind of have a lacy look
to them.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Yes, they're sexy.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
You wear these?
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I wear those just about every day.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Okay, they're not sexy.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Ah, all right, they're not sexy, but they're pea pads.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
What do you mean, so every day you put this on?
Speaker 2 (21:14):
I do because I hate wet panties. How often a
day do you change your panties? Several times a day? Well,
if you wear one of those, you won't have to.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
But then doesn't it just make you wet and you're
sitting in a wet pad?
Speaker 2 (21:27):
No, it's always. So it's got like that secret layered
thing going on.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
All right, we'll have to try it, all right, Well,
I'm going to try it before our next episode. But
I also think it's super weird that you wear a
peapad every.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Day, and I'm not embarrassed at all. I tell my
husband these are not pads. I'm not on my period,
so we can have sex.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
How come you're not embarrassed about it?
Speaker 2 (21:46):
I don't know. I don't know. For some reason, just
like it's a peapad I tinkle when I laugh.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
I'm pretty sure that I'll be wearing depends when I'm older.
So when I was a kid, I had a friend
and we just did weird stuff together and we wanted
to try out depends. So we went to the store.
We walked down to the store from her house.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Okay, wait, you wanted to try why?
Speaker 1 (22:13):
I don't know. I just wanted to see if they
could actually work.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
And I was thinking depends, like, why are these people
peeing themselves?
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Little?
Speaker 1 (22:22):
See that's karma.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Yeah, Karma came back and said, you laughed, and now
I'm gonna plague you.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
But we went to the store. We bought the depends,
and we stored up as much pea as our little
bodies could hold.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
Oh my god, how old are you?
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I'm gonna say, twelve?
Speaker 2 (22:44):
Why. I still don't get why, Like I just it
never and I've seen the commercials. I mean I probably
saw them when I was twelve, but it never occurred
to me the hey, let's try these depends diverts.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
We had a lot of weird stuff this friend.
Speaker 3 (22:59):
We actually had a piece of toilet paper strip that
we kept in her bathroom. She had her own bathroom
and there was a strip of toilet paper and we
would put our boogers on it.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
Oh, that is so disgusting, and I hate the B word.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
We say monsters in my house. You have a monster
in your nose with.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
All of your sexual liberation, and boogers send you over
the edge.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
And potty talk. I think it's I think it's the
poo and the farting and the monsters. I'm not going
to say the B word.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Well, anyway, we went and we got the depends.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Okay, this is so embarrassing.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
We stored up all the pea we could muster, and
then we went and we got in her tub and
we both peede at the same time in standing in
her tub in our depends.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
You have to hear them, and let me tell you,
they held a lot.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
It wasn't until I got older that I realized.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
I think they're for leaks, not for like a diaper,
like a baby leaks.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
You don't think that, aren't they for like pooh or something.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
No, they're just for if you It's like a pea
pad version, the old school pea pad version.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Okay, I always thought it depends was like a diaper.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
It is a diaper. It is like a full on diaper.
But I don't think you're supposed to like it.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
It did it leak?
Speaker 1 (24:22):
No, wow, held strong.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
I have to know you. These are not for full
on peeing yourself. I won't.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
That was a freaking weird thing to do.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
It was a very weird thing to do. These are
for your daily tinkles, So don't go PN and the
damn always discreet.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
All right, all right, all right, I'll try to hold
myself back.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
Okay, so I've grown since it depends incident, but I
feel like you're always going to hold that one against me.
Now I am, so I will use it though when
I'm taking a walk.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
So you know how I mentioned how my two problems
are colliding. So last week I took a walk.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Okay, as I'm.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
Leaving for the walk, I go to the bathroom like
twice right before I leave, and on the walk, I
get about I don't know, two minutes into the walk
and I took a step off a curb and I tinkled,
as you would say myself.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
And then within another ten minutes again another little tinkle,
and I am having to go to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
So bad. There was a church that's not too far
from me, and they had a dumpster, so I went
and hit around the dumpster and Peede continued walking, continued tinkling,
and then found myself in a residential area where I
again had to get in a shady dark spot and
pee again.
Speaker 3 (25:52):
I can't get away from it. It was a thirty
minute walk. I came home because I felt so disgusting.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
And your panties were wet because you didn't have on
a pee pad.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
I didn't know I was supposed to wear a pea pad.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
They help, They're really nice.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
Fine, I'm gonna use it.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Okay, I'm gonna try it. Are you gonna try caggles? No, Well,
you already said you were trying them, so just keep
trying them. Right.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
I just did two right now, So that's got to
cover me for at least a year. Yeah. So I
met this woman.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
I was talking to her about all my peen because
she runs, and I think, how do you possibly run?
I literally can't walk without peeing. And she told me
that she got a bladder lift.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
Oh wow, So when she had her.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
Second kid, they lifted her bladder at the same.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
Time wit she had like a Syrian section.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
I guess so. And at that time they lifted her bladder.
She said, best decision she's ever made in her life.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
Really, yep.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
And I googled bladderlift and it looked like a fist
of flesh.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
Popping out of a vagina, and I thought, that doesn't
feel authentic for me.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
And I'm just scared because I'm thinking.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
The peeing is already so bad, right, and I'm clearly
too lazy for keegels, and it.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Just irks me. So what does my future hold?
Speaker 2 (27:12):
It's not gonna be good bladderlift. You're gonna get a
bladder lift?
Speaker 1 (27:17):
No, I'm not going to. I'm saying it's looked freaky,
I know.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
But if you're already tinkling and peeing now, it is
just gonna get worse. We're getting older.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
What are you gonna do about yours?
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Oh man, I'm just gonna keep up with the kegls.
Oh yeah, I'll just keep doing cagles when I.
Speaker 3 (27:36):
Don't think it's working though, because you're wearing a peap
pet every day, so what?
Speaker 2 (27:39):
And I'm lazy?
Speaker 3 (27:42):
And now I'm just totally freaked out because if it's
already bad, now I can't even imagine what this situation
looks like in five years, ten years.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Yeah, you should be scared, because my situation just keeps
getting worse. Two weeks ago, my pea hole was stressing
me out. I had a kidney stone.
Speaker 1 (28:02):
I've never had a kidney stone.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
Nor had I I didn't even know what it was.
All I know is I had this pain in my stomach.
I thought that it was indigestion. I was chugging pepto
and I went to the er and they said, you
passed the huge kidney stone. Your kidney's bruised, and you
have another one in there that we need to blast.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Oh my gosh, Chris.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I know, I know, I'm so old. Anyway, So I
go in and I get my They go up my
pea hole and they blast the kidney stone and pull
the pieces out. Then they put about an eight inch
stick in my kidney and bladder. Yes, and they said
it wasn't going to be painful. Every time I peed,
(28:48):
it burned every time. And then and then the medicine
that they gave me to relax my bladder turn my
pea pumpkin orange sick. It was sick, and it was
super painful, and they wanted the stint to stay in
for like a whole month, but I made him take
it out after a week.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Is that dangerous?
Speaker 2 (29:08):
What leaving it in for a month or taking it
out in a week taking it out in a week.
I think they left it in so that any small
additional stones could pass. But like I said, it hurt
every time I peece, so I just and I could
feel it. So I went in after a week and
I got them to take it out, and I felt tempully.
I felt it coming out of my kidney. They went
(29:28):
up my pea hole. Oh oh it was It was
just a number pea hole. Yeah. So I go in
there and I lay on this table and I spread
my legs open, and she takes this cue tip with
this gel on it and puts it in my pea
hole because it's supposed to numb it. And I'm like,
keep going, go deeper. Put the gel in as far
(29:49):
go because I did not want to feel the pain
of that stint coming out. And then so she put
it up in there and she numbed it and it
came out relatively quickly. I could feel it coming out
of my kidney. It was really gross. And painful, but
my pea hole didn't burn until the anesthetic wore off,
(30:10):
and then my pea hole was hurting and my kidney
was hurting for like four days. Dang, that's what I'm
talking about. And then I had to get up by
the cruel world. And then I'm getting up every forty
five minutes to pee with a burning peele torture.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Well, this has been a buzzkill. Sorry, every day vaginas,
please help us with our peace situation. Please tell us
besides KALs what we can do or a bladderliss oh barf.
It's the blind leading the blind around here. Please help
us figure out what to do, or let's help each
(30:50):
other figure out. Yes, our solution is together, we could
start a whole community around peeing support ah.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
Every day vagina is pe posse ha ha. Okay. Well,
thank you for listening to what our vaginas are saying.
For questions, comments, or to let us know what your
vagina is saying, email us at my vagina Said What
at gmail dot com DM and follow us on Instagram
and Facebook at hashtag my vagina said what. Listen, subscribe
(31:21):
and rate us on Seneca Women iHeartRadio or wherever you listen.
Speaker 1 (31:26):
Our vagina knowledge is based solely on our experience as
vagina owners. Please see your doctor if you have any
concerns about your vagina.
Speaker 4 (31:34):
What
Popular Podcasts
NFL Daily with Gregg Rosenthal
Gregg Rosenthal and a rotating crew of elite NFL Media co-hosts, including Patrick Claybon, Colleen Wolfe, Steve Wyche, Nick Shook and Jourdan Rodrigue of The Athletic get you caught up daily on all the NFL news and analysis you need to be smarter and funnier than your friends.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com