June 2, 2023 • 56 mins
Stephanie Allynne (The L Word, One Mississippi) joins Arden and Bryan for a non-stop episode of hot dates!! She's so hot she dates HERSELF in the improv portion! This episode has it ALLLLLL HUNNNAY alpha theater kids, runaway helium balloons, open robes!!! If you think YOU got bullied in high school- THINK AGAIN KITTY CATS- because Stephanie has a story for YOU! Call the press! Do your contouring! Sit back and CHILLLLLAX!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
No, who are you wearing? Will there be pressed to Alethabi?
She coney, Yeah, didn't and Bryan, I hear it last
there and they've got lat of podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
But honey, no, no, no, no, honor grass pees. We
live in legamon life celebrities and sharing our favorite FEB recipes.
But honey, no, no, no, no auntographs, no.
Speaker 3 (00:41):
Autograph there, no autograph.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
Hello, welcome to another episode of No Autographs Please.
Speaker 5 (00:47):
My name is Arto Marine.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I'm Brent Sappy. I know we say this every week,
but it legitimately feels like I haven't seen you in
a year, but I think I did. I just see
you last week.
Speaker 4 (00:54):
I know, but it's been a long time and I
feel it.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
No I change.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
I feel like I've you've changed.
Speaker 5 (00:58):
I've changed.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
I have a lot of contouring now. I put a
full face.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
On a face I know. And you've been stealing from
NeiMa Marcus. I was there earlier and they said, don't
you do that show with her Green?
Speaker 4 (01:06):
I did. I'm like, I'm a Wanona writer of two
thousand and five. Remember she didn't know what was.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
So chic about pa I'll tell you why. Stephanie Allen.
Speaker 5 (01:16):
Okay, wait.
Speaker 4 (01:19):
From the l word. You know her from One Mississippi.
She's an actor, a writer or director, comedian. She was
for years on a classic comedy team with Lauren lopkez
Our Queens Anymore.
Speaker 6 (01:32):
Stephanie online that I had to move on.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
Lauren.
Speaker 5 (01:41):
Okay, wait, so we're writer.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
Okay, Stephanie, I don't know if you ever knew this.
Speaker 5 (01:45):
Do you know the sex?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
I yes, no.
Speaker 7 (01:47):
No, no, it was about her crime.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
Also about her crime, so you know she was stealing
from sex and what she was stealing mostly was Mark
Jacob's clothing. Great, he got so much press out of this.
He told her, you never have to pay for another
one on my out. And she's at that Mark Jacob's
store no less than once a week getting things altered.
Oh yeah, she's there all the time. I see her
in Johnson Third. I mean I don't see her. I
(02:14):
saw her.
Speaker 5 (02:14):
Once, okay, because I think apparently bankrupt.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Someone then told me someone then told me she's there
all the time.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Okay. Now, I heard years ago for her, long before
Pharah fawce Ha got called out for being a little
sticky fingers. I heard before it was in the press
that she I think it was also at SAX. I
think SAX knew and like they basically were like let
her do it, like like and they would just sort
of send the bills to allegedly to the business manager
and like, let her do it.
Speaker 6 (02:44):
I've seen the tape of Winona Ryder, Like when you
see the video, it's like, what.
Speaker 7 (02:48):
Is she doing?
Speaker 3 (02:49):
Like, no, I know what you mean, because like there was.
Speaker 6 (02:54):
Always people going like no, you know, celebrities, they're used
to not paying. They go in, they have like an agreement,
and then you watch it and you're like.
Speaker 5 (03:01):
No, it's a thrill.
Speaker 7 (03:02):
Yeah, she's actually doing.
Speaker 4 (03:04):
Says like a high I think there was a there
was like a book that came out Go to a
b or something, and it was like it was like
the thrill of it's the thrill.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
One with Captain Ahab exactly. What's that one called? That's
the one that.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Whale had sticky fingering. Your conjouring looks great, Brian?
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Did you very much? Did tell you what I did
do today? Talk to me and I don't like to
talk trade secrets.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Sure, okay, he's a celebrity.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I was just in l past, so okay, his.
Speaker 4 (03:38):
Eyes are closed business.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
I was visiting my family what do you tell all
your clients? I tell all my clients, visit your family
and then come back and openly weep for three hours,
because even though nothing happened, everything happened.
Speaker 4 (03:49):
You know, if you do not have a crying jag
after visiting your family, then they didn't raise a funny kid.
You have to have that much.
Speaker 5 (03:56):
Damn right, you need a three.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Even it wasn't even traumatic or anything.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
How is your relationship with you fast?
Speaker 7 (04:03):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (04:04):
Who's the tricky? 's the tricky one?
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Do you visit them?
Speaker 6 (04:07):
Ever?
Speaker 5 (04:07):
My dead dad is a tricky one.
Speaker 7 (04:09):
Okay.
Speaker 6 (04:09):
I'm really close with my family, so I see them
a lot. But then we have all the ship goes down?
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Or where were you raised?
Speaker 4 (04:17):
I'm just I know up north. I like to think
of her as North Carolina. She's she's Northern California. I
heard she's La California. See you, You're like, it's got
to be.
Speaker 5 (04:32):
California.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
I thought I always thought Greenland. Is that not true?
Speaker 4 (04:35):
I heard I heard North Norfoundland.
Speaker 5 (04:39):
You're from l A.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
You're from There's no way. I can't think does.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
That makes sense? Both my parents are from l A.
I was born in Arcadia. I lived in Temecula, which
is Inland, Orange County. My parents were Orange County and
then I lived in Buffalo where my bike it's right
wing Christian.
Speaker 4 (04:59):
There you go.
Speaker 7 (05:00):
So because hot air balloons wineries. But yes, do you remember.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
Speaking of hot air balloons, do you remember that fake
falcon kid that was in like the hot air the
fake by balloon boy that was kind of an autograss please,
It's like the guy built the fake space ship that
kind of looked like a Jiffy pop thing and his
son's falcon but he was so he was, but he
was on land. He wasn't up there. That's so who
is the who's the tricky one?
Speaker 7 (05:25):
I mean I think we all take our moments that's fair. Yeah, yeah,
I don't.
Speaker 6 (05:29):
We don't have like the one that's okay where we
all go. I mean maybe you know what extended fam like, okay,
aunts and uncles, some who's not toy Mama probably.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
I mean, I don't know every I sort of agree
with you that everyone is a little tricky and a
little this or that. Actually my first photographs please nomination
is actually and I've done her before, but my mom
this time said, I want to do you a favor
tell me and I was like, And by the way,
when my mom says that, I'm like, oh god, I
have to go make her phone involved in whatever about
(06:02):
to I can't wait. And she goes, well, I figured
you should clean out my closet now before I die
so you won't have to do it later.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
My mom made me do that, by the way, and it.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
Took twelve hours, and I did it like an idiot.
Speaker 5 (06:12):
I made you that.
Speaker 4 (06:13):
She made me clean out the attic so that it
was clean when she died, and it was.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
And my mom is not even ill, Like okay, my mom.
Speaker 6 (06:21):
Her parents died twenty years apart from each other. Yeah,
she still has the ashes of both of them, is
still trying to figure out the funeral to plan and
is certified in functionuey and then put the ashes in
her helpful people corner of her home.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
What is that's a helpful I need one of those.
Speaker 6 (06:41):
Like if you like in function, your house has like
a bogwa over it, so you have like one area's health,
one area is money, one.
Speaker 4 (06:47):
Area helpful people and people.
Speaker 6 (06:49):
I like that.
Speaker 7 (06:50):
And she just has like a box of ashes. It's
not even like and it's just like the box.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
You know that there are dolls and I forget the
name them that you stick in the courts.
Speaker 7 (07:01):
Dolls.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
No, they're like life sized dolls. But they don't have faces.
I know everyone thinks I'm lying at where it's true.
You need to stick them around your house because you
just see the back of their heads and it makes
you It's for people who feel lonely. No, it's horrible.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Oh that's sad.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
Yeah, but they don't have faces. I don't know why.
I think it's too expensive.
Speaker 4 (07:19):
Yeah, you don't want to pay extra for the face.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
You just need a head.
Speaker 4 (07:21):
Now, may I do the first?
Speaker 5 (07:24):
Not autogos?
Speaker 7 (07:24):
Please energy for the week.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Okay, Just thinking of extended family, I've decided to nominate
my paternal grandmother, who was just almost like a mommy
dearest kind of. She had delusions of grandeur. She thought
she was hot. She looked like she was one hundred
when she was like forty.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
When we would watch she was so old.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
She when she died, there was just like cigarette burns
all over her mattress, you know what I mean. Because
she would just fall asleep like chainsmoking and watching TV.
She had a car that had suicide doors that like
open belt, yes, but so she this is the move.
Though my parents were married I guess fifty years. Never
once did she say call me mom, call me Helen.
(08:07):
My mother had to call her missus marine until she died.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Missus Marine.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Her mom, her my dad's mom. She had to call
missus marine. She could never call her Helen. Oh Mom,
it was missus marine until she'd be like, yes, missus Marine, okay.
There was never like please call me Helen. She was
missus marine.
Speaker 8 (08:31):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (08:31):
By the way, also our beautiful production team Katie and Anna.
Anna sounds like she's drunk because she's hammered. And she
also went to bedet.
Speaker 7 (08:40):
No, what do you think of that?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
No autograss please energy pretty fresh?
Speaker 3 (08:44):
I mean, do your children call you missus Allen only.
Speaker 5 (08:50):
Missus Allen? Mama, mama.
Speaker 6 (08:53):
I have such like, I like love of people like
that though, where I'm like, oh, they just hold on
to that ship. Yeah, and it seems kind of fun. Yeah,
you're kind of like, all right, we're going to live
in this world.
Speaker 4 (09:06):
Were doing this?
Speaker 7 (09:07):
The formality is like almost and.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
They really when you do that, they really do control
the narrative. Like when you are asking to be called
missus something or mister something. It's your world, Yeah, it
really is.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
She also like was not fancy at all. And then
she but she delusion a branchure, but she wanted to
be so that she would send like an itemized list
when she was older. Of she was like, I need
like two hundred dollars, and she would itemize what it
was for, so it was like seventy five dollars like
town and country subscription, and then like one hundred and
twenty five.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
She died before Venmo. You would get so.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
Many a town of country and then oxygen. Oxygen was
after a town like it was just the She wanted
to be society, but wasn't like the missus marine of
it all.
Speaker 5 (09:50):
The town that's a real no audog gossa please energy.
Speaker 7 (09:53):
I love that.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
I was six. We used to grizz it my great
grade an. We called it grizzly hypertextas we A did
you this week. I had a wonderful grizzit. But I
went to grizzit my great great I'll tell you what
bugs me. I never know. I grew up on aunt
and I never know whether to say.
Speaker 5 (10:15):
I say an you do?
Speaker 3 (10:16):
What do you say?
Speaker 7 (10:16):
See I say, Anne, but I would love if someone
like it's it's aunt.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
Honestly, feel like.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
That's that's Allen energy. Aunt is real, Miss Allen.
Speaker 7 (10:25):
I like that.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
So we went to go visit her. Her name was
Dody Dorothy, but everyone called her Dody, which is basically like, hey,
you're way too much of an asshole to be a
Dorothy exactly, You're a jerk. When I was six years old,
she'd be like, here, come here, and I'd be terrified.
She was gonk, give me a kiss.
Speaker 4 (10:42):
She came here, sounds like I'm going to show you
a baby. Show me on the doll where Jody touched you.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
She was in a nursing home. My family makes and
family full of kleptomaniacs. I used to steal stuff from
my aunt all the time, but have to a rider.
Actually yes, but I used to still throw pillow from
Nema Marcus. Yeah, it was like six, you did, Yeah
I would. But this was the day. This was the day.
Who was president? Trying to think Ford, No, he wasn't Nixon.
(11:09):
This was the day when you know what, it's not
important titant.
Speaker 4 (11:15):
We met on the Titanic going down. He tried to
drown me, but I stayed to float and then I
made a marrine.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
I think it was Nixon because that was right when
I walked through the water. It was Nixon. And so anyway, okay.
So she would say to me, I need you to
steal packets of salt and bring them to me, and
then she would say cigarettes. But I couldn't really give
my hand on cigarettes. But I used to bring her
packets of salts, like I would go to McDonald's and
ask them for packets a salt, Do you have some?
Speaker 7 (11:39):
It was like valued in your family.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
So excuse me. Since ancient Egypt.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
I would like to say book, I would say between
the polo and then this, I feel like we're very I.
Speaker 6 (11:54):
Feel like we're very.
Speaker 4 (11:57):
I feel like we're on like we've wrinted cape. A
private yacht, Missus Marinas chartered it. We're meeting We're meeting
her at it. We're gonna have a grizit with her Guida.
Speaker 7 (12:12):
Before I say this, just remind me.
Speaker 6 (12:15):
So I have a very good friend, and I always
think about this with stealing.
Speaker 7 (12:19):
I won't can't name her.
Speaker 6 (12:21):
When she was in high school, she was at the
mall and the power went out and she said something
went haywire in her head where she was like time
to grab everything. She started grabbing jewelry and like yeah
in Delaware, and then ran out the front of the
(12:42):
mall where as security was and they immediately arrested her.
Speaker 5 (12:46):
And she was like the.
Speaker 4 (12:50):
Panic, it's weird, but the glitch in your brain. Yeah,
So I was side of myself. Here's what I did,
like the side of myself. I was hiking with my
friend Chris, and she's like such a lady, my friend,
and this was We're hiking and like a rattlesnake crossed
our path and like something glitched in my brain.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
Thot belt and I.
Speaker 5 (13:13):
Died it around my waist.
Speaker 4 (13:15):
I took Chris and I shoved her in front of
me to protect.
Speaker 5 (13:19):
Me, but treat me in the stake is.
Speaker 4 (13:21):
He clothed the lights going out. I was like, I
I didn't try to save her. I didn't see belt armor.
I shoved her between half the snake could take me.
Speaker 7 (13:32):
Fucking you just.
Speaker 4 (13:36):
You're grizsiting me.
Speaker 5 (13:37):
We're going for a break.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
And then I just shoved her at the rattlesnake arden.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
I'm thinking, I'm rethinking my entire apocalypse plane at this point. No, don't, don't.
Speaker 9 (13:45):
Don't.
Speaker 5 (13:45):
Don't tell people because they'll all want to come here.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
That's true, that's true.
Speaker 4 (13:48):
We are going to spend it here with men.
Speaker 7 (13:51):
We're here.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Are you still going to come? Because I'll be waiting
for you in the apocalypse.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
I'm gonna come.
Speaker 5 (13:55):
Do you still you? You promise?
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Yes? I will, But just don't shove me in front
of us.
Speaker 4 (14:00):
That sounded half.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
Way will because.
Speaker 4 (14:04):
Honestly, I'll tell you.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
I'm not going to be around as your friend. I'm
not going to be around.
Speaker 6 (14:08):
And she was charged with grand thought, whoa because grande.
Speaker 7 (14:13):
Is anything over one thousand.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Dollars, she gets to keep any of this?
Speaker 6 (14:20):
She was under eighteen, so she didn't have to go
to jail, but she had to do community service and
pulled the bingo balls at the senior so it's fun.
Speaker 5 (14:27):
I would pay to do that.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
Can I ask you a question, because this is this
is the heartbreaking part of this entire thing. Did she
get to keep anything?
Speaker 4 (14:33):
To keep it?
Speaker 7 (14:35):
To follow up?
Speaker 3 (14:36):
As I took your back, I feel like if you
get in trouble for just as I did.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
I we both thought it was like, what do you
get to keep from Claires, you know, a fine hoop
of fun hair, access jewelry, just sort of grabbing jewelry.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
What's your who's your autographs?
Speaker 3 (14:55):
Pleasing?
Speaker 6 (14:55):
Okay, I was saying about this and this is this
is actually a group of people in my highest goal
nice and for lack of better word, they were all nerds,
but like you know, the nerd table is who I'm
going to nominate this because it's like a reverse mean
girls where I there was this girl. Her locker was undermine, quintessential,
(15:16):
like in a screech way, like like made her own clothes, glasses,
had a rolling backpack, like yeah yeah, and she was
so mean to me on a daily basis. Yes, And
my locker was above her. I was older than her,
and she would move it. Stephanie go with her and
(15:40):
she'd roll her back.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
She was ready, she was ready for it.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
Give me the Gray Bob and I'm in the like
I'm in like the Lady and the Short and that
the animated movie, the Incredible Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 6 (15:56):
And then she started doing theater and I did theater
and I was like, okay, I'm gonna be like we're
now in this together. Still has that same energy. I'm
like I would say hi do I would say hey,
how are you hello?
Speaker 4 (16:06):
Yes, Stephanie like me hated.
Speaker 6 (16:11):
I'm like I thinking I'm being nice and yeah, I couldn't.
Speaker 7 (16:16):
I was like I couldn't. It truly was the girls.
I'm like, how am I going to go? Did you lose? No?
Speaker 6 (16:22):
And then we were in the school play together, and god,
it wasn't a real it wasn't like murder mystery high
school thing. And I remember I entered and I did
my line and.
Speaker 7 (16:35):
She goes God, and then she goes timing.
Speaker 6 (16:47):
Stephanie and I was cool in the stereotypical high school world.
Speaker 7 (16:54):
On the bottom, I could not get in there.
Speaker 6 (16:58):
And then I would like I had to like work
with her online tim in time to.
Speaker 5 (17:04):
Like ruin her.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
I hope, so wow.
Speaker 6 (17:06):
And i would sit with her at lunch with her
table and I'm nominating the table because they were all like this,
and I'm like, let's go like running lines for a thing.
Speaker 7 (17:14):
They were so mean to me. They were like, get
the fuck out of here.
Speaker 6 (17:18):
And then I would go sit at my table, which
would be seen like a in the like very stereotypical way.
It's like popular where you think they were mean and
everyone's like, you look so cute, like your shirt and
everyone's so nice. You go over there and they're like
that fucking bitch. And then they would talk about all
my friends like they're so ugly.
Speaker 7 (17:36):
Look at that story.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
I'm like, holy yes, yes these are the bullys.
Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yeah, that is a vibe. Doctor Bannana, if you could
speak right now, what would you say?
Speaker 5 (17:52):
Are you wowed by this?
Speaker 3 (17:53):
I mean I'm shaken to my core. That's terrified.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
Did you have anybody like this in your high school?
Speaker 6 (17:58):
No?
Speaker 3 (17:58):
Everyone was pretty nice.
Speaker 7 (18:00):
What time the bottom?
Speaker 3 (18:02):
You know what that means. I'll tell you what that.
Speaker 4 (18:03):
You're the main girl.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
That's right, always means that means.
Speaker 4 (18:07):
You did you g It's definitely no.
Speaker 3 (18:10):
I was pretty nice too.
Speaker 5 (18:12):
Why did you back her?
Speaker 3 (18:12):
Tize anyone in high school who says high school was
great and there were no bullies, mean it wasn't you.
But no, I I was definitely talked down to by
some people. But I definitely don't think like there was
that energy. I don't know where that energy that was.
Speaker 7 (18:25):
I was like, what the fuck is it? Like reality?
Speaker 4 (18:28):
I'm obsessed with that's a missus marine. Move that to
call me missus marine move because like I snatched the power.
Speaker 5 (18:35):
I hurt you before you hurt me.
Speaker 9 (18:37):
And I respect that.
Speaker 3 (18:38):
You know what I have to say, I actually admire
and I am very proud of the fact that you
didn't win her over, because honestly, what a great lesson
to be, Like, I don't have to please everybody.
Speaker 5 (18:48):
She tried to till she graduated.
Speaker 6 (18:51):
It's like in relationships when you feel you're the higher
status and then they break up.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
With you and you're like, wait, that doesn't go that way.
Speaker 7 (18:58):
You can't break Yeah, you do?
Speaker 5 (19:00):
You have you learn date me question? Do you remember
her first name?
Speaker 7 (19:05):
I do, but I feel weird saying Okay.
Speaker 5 (19:07):
We write it down and we can see it later.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
Does it rhyme with jowlerie?
Speaker 5 (19:12):
Close?
Speaker 7 (19:13):
But with a V E? See, I'm still being nice
to her.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
Do you ever grizz Do you ever? Have you?
Speaker 4 (19:26):
Have you gristed her?
Speaker 3 (19:27):
Well?
Speaker 6 (19:28):
I also think her name really matches her, which is yes, Judy.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
Yeah, I have a cat sur name Judy that I'm
obsessed with.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
Judy Well. Also, I don't know if you did you
know that Judy Garland? It was Judy Garland.
Speaker 5 (19:43):
She's never heard of Judy Garden.
Speaker 3 (19:45):
Well, know Stephanie. I knew very famously back then. This
was when I think Jack was in the White House.
Ye and Stephanie, that's right. I would pick her up
after j Garland show. That's interesting by us, and we
call the president.
Speaker 5 (19:58):
Did you do a little couple of uppers?
Speaker 3 (19:59):
A couple we do, some barbituates, some upper get them
from duty exactly. We rated that medicine cabinet on more
than one A kid.
Speaker 4 (20:06):
If it's in a medicine cabinet's free, it's.
Speaker 5 (20:09):
Up for grabs.
Speaker 4 (20:10):
Here you heard, who would you like to nominate today?
Speaker 3 (20:12):
We nominated my mom. But I got to tell you,
and I don't mean this to sound unfresh, okay, but
I want to nominate hot air balloons and I'll tell
you why.
Speaker 7 (20:21):
Okay, great?
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Did you know and I just learned this. Hot air
balloons have absolutely no control when they stop.
Speaker 4 (20:28):
What do you mean?
Speaker 3 (20:29):
A truck has to follow them because they don't know
where they're going to land, and so they land anywhere.
And I just saw a video of a hot air
balloon landing through a park with people running and usually
and I know people who have done hot air balloons,
one person a diarrhea in it. And this was during
a proposer. Copanola was proposing to his wife, and he
did it as a like as a romantic joke of
(20:49):
like I'm gonna take her in a hot air balloon
and propose. She got very sick up there.
Speaker 4 (20:53):
She had diarrhea.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
But then I know other people who have done it,
who the same thing. They're like, the guy all is
that when you're about to land, it's like, so we're
probably gonna fall out. That usually is what happens. Honey.
They got dragged. They got dragged for zero point one
miles dragged, and then they just whatever property they land on,
the truck has a bottle of whatever champagne to be like,
sorry that we landed here. That's how it goes.
Speaker 5 (21:16):
Every time.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
Every time I.
Speaker 6 (21:18):
Played softball in high school and we were at practice
and a hot air balloom started colming down, it's like.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
Excuse me, wow, I did not know anything.
Speaker 7 (21:31):
I didn't know that.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
Was Oh no, it's typical. It's typical that like literally
they're like you take off and they're like, so we
don't know where we're going or how we're gonna land,
and then we do. Seriously, can you match it? That's
why the truck has to follow them with the champagne bottle.
Speaker 4 (21:43):
Wow?
Speaker 3 (21:44):
Yeah, and you usually fall out.
Speaker 7 (21:47):
On the land.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
What do you mean by that? So the balloon lands,
but it doesn't like down, it.
Speaker 8 (21:54):
Like comes in yere. This was and you get dragged
and it's horrible.
Speaker 5 (21:59):
By a whole, Yes, like by a whore.
Speaker 3 (22:01):
But then someone else told me they didn't get dragged
and it was really nice. But I was like, I've
heard you're the one person out of.
Speaker 4 (22:05):
Everyone remind you they're trying to break your feet.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
I love that. A hot air balloon really couldn't give
a funk. No, and it did mass to be in
that position. No, a balloon doesn't want to.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
Carry you because it knows it's gorgeous. It's like I'm beautiful,
they argue you. I don't need to learn how to land.
You're gonna keep coming at me whether I try or not.
Speaker 5 (22:22):
I'm gorgeous. That's no autographs. Please do me a favor,
do me a favor.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Take take your.
Speaker 5 (22:27):
Wife on the balloon.
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Ride get dragged, Get dragged.
Speaker 3 (22:31):
Well, and everyone's anti dragon. Now I say, you be
pro drag. You know what I mean?
Speaker 4 (22:38):
Who's that your therapist? The Paparazzi. Okay, listen, So we're
about to take a quick break and when we come back,
as any podcast that has a seamless flow from segment
to segment, we then come back and we have a
hotel bill hot bell and if we're Brian and are
going to be going on an improvised first date, and
it has to go well Stephane, Okay, it has to
(23:02):
end well drug stefinitely. So we've had our listeners d
m us on naps pod want our podcast at at
naps but you can email us at napspod the number
one at Gmail. These are real lines of the worst
things that have been said to our listeners on dates
out of context. So if you hear this, that is
a real lifeline that has been said to somebody that
(23:24):
listens to this podcast. Brian and I are going in
a date. Stephanie will be joining in as the rest
of the world. We have first sam sort have been
emailed into us.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
We do I'm going to be Canavan.
Speaker 4 (23:34):
Well now I'm going to be a real life person
named I'm a nut and we will be going on
a date on a I think we need to Brian
on obviously, sure, and we're back. Brian and I are
(23:56):
on a first date that has to end. Well, we're
currently about to board a hot air blow. My name
is I'm a.
Speaker 5 (24:01):
Nut and Brian is canavan.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
I'm a hey caravan, No canavan, canna van go faster
than a car? You know that's yeah, wow, yeah, and
that's a sincere question. I've actually been looking for an answer.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
Well, cannav and go faster than I'm going to say
it probably can't because there's a lot of a weight
to it.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Well, thank you for meeting me. I thought that we
do really something very sort of romantic, okay, and you
look strong, so I thought you might be up for
a little hut air balloon. I'm very rich. Soney means
nothing to me, and I wondered if you won't want
to go with you.
Speaker 4 (24:41):
Well, I have to say I'm a little bit I
see that there's a lot of birds in the sky.
Speaker 5 (24:45):
I get a little bit nervous.
Speaker 4 (24:46):
You might not know that pigeons are just the rats
of the sky.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
You know what. I have thought that before. I'll be
honest with you, I'd.
Speaker 5 (24:55):
Love to join you. This is gadgets. We're in kind
of like an urban setting.
Speaker 4 (24:58):
Do you think it'll be hard for us to fly
this hot air balloon or absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
We're on top of a building, baby, my building. I
own this bilm Oh you are?
Speaker 4 (25:06):
You are wearing a giant medallion out of a dollar sign?
Speaker 3 (25:09):
I ever heard of the bumpet? That was me?
Speaker 5 (25:11):
Oh good, oh.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Oh, oh god, damn.
Speaker 7 (25:14):
It all ready to go up?
Speaker 4 (25:16):
Yeah, yeah, thank you.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
You know. I have to be honest. You're not a
very elegant person. I don't mean that. Don't mean that.
It's an accusation. But we're going on a hot air balloon, right.
Speaker 7 (25:22):
I thought it'd be a little cold. It's just I'm
very elegant.
Speaker 6 (25:26):
Okay, Okay, I'm graceful and elegant. Okay, Bruce h you
always call me mister Thornton.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
Okay, mister.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
I have a few questions before we start. This is
from mister Thornton, because I'm worried about my safety and
also worried about who you might be as a person.
Who's your favorite character in Four Weddings and a Funeral?
Speaker 7 (25:47):
I haven't uh here, grant.
Speaker 3 (25:50):
Okay, that's good, that's good.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
I'm concerned you're not thugged out enough for me, so
I don't know that that's the right answer.
Speaker 7 (25:59):
You look like any tanner.
Speaker 4 (26:05):
I get that a lot.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Did you watch Fuller House?
Speaker 7 (26:12):
Oh I missed it.
Speaker 6 (26:13):
I got Netflix just for that show.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
Mister Thornton. I gotta tell you, I'm feeling very comfortable
with you.
Speaker 4 (26:20):
Let's get it.
Speaker 7 (26:21):
Get up, all right, let's do it.
Speaker 4 (26:23):
I'm going to tell you, Oh god, this is uncomfortable.
Speaker 6 (26:25):
It's a little everyone's got the length of their hips.
By the way, your hips give off a very fertile vibe.
Speaker 5 (26:34):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
Are you ready for you are welcome. It's on the line,
mister Thornton, It's on the mist.
Speaker 4 (26:41):
Thank you. You know what my ex, my ex told
me that I looked like my eggs would be like dust,
like like like sea turtles and dust, and so that
makes me feel better.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
You're not cool enough to make my ex sheellus?
Speaker 4 (26:53):
Excuse me?
Speaker 3 (26:54):
What what was that? I said? You're not cool enough
to make my ex jellous?
Speaker 7 (27:01):
A woman could ever be president? Periods?
Speaker 6 (27:04):
Yo, Let's just remember gender.
Speaker 4 (27:08):
Can we just take off here, police for saying let's
explain how this works?
Speaker 9 (27:12):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (27:13):
So he makes everything rides and we're going to ride.
That wasn't I chose aerospace engineering is my major because
it was.
Speaker 5 (27:21):
The only thing I couldn't learn on YouTube.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
So you're a lot smarter than I thought you'd be.
I thought you were a hairstylist.
Speaker 4 (27:29):
I bought the hairstylist and an aerospace engineer.
Speaker 6 (27:32):
My coworkers have it out for me, and that's why
I was fired three times.
Speaker 7 (27:36):
So let's get oh my god, no more questions.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Were you fired?
Speaker 4 (27:47):
Why were you fired?
Speaker 6 (27:48):
A little bit of a sticky finger? That's why I
came itself up in the air.
Speaker 4 (27:51):
Just one finger. You just sticky finger? Where do you
put that finger? Okay, so listen. I just want to
say before we get going, I washed my sheets just
in case, and I shaved.
Speaker 3 (28:08):
Wow that music to uh oh you like music?
Speaker 4 (28:13):
It's guess what. Later on this week, I'm having some
friends over for a Madman party. We all wear fifties
clothes and watch the show.
Speaker 5 (28:21):
What do you wear?
Speaker 3 (28:22):
Don't talk about mad Man for this city. He doesn't
know what that is.
Speaker 4 (28:25):
House.
Speaker 7 (28:26):
That's right, and you grant my two fates?
Speaker 8 (28:29):
Now, quick update already what's going on?
Speaker 6 (28:34):
This feels like we're just flying to tell you something
before we took off. We don't know how to land
and me but also speaking for all hot air ballots.
Uh huh, so when we run out of uh helium, helium,
heliums right fire to fire, fire and helium. Yeah, we
will see where we're dragged to and where we.
Speaker 4 (28:56):
We're like over like highways right now, because that feels
pretty fun. It's like an a.
Speaker 3 (29:02):
No natural beauty. It's literally only we're just just see
three ways.
Speaker 5 (29:06):
Why did you I didn't know that.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
I thought we were going the other way where the
woods are.
Speaker 6 (29:10):
Well, honestly, you know we could end up in France.
What language do they speak in France?
Speaker 7 (29:16):
You know what?
Speaker 3 (29:16):
Oh? My god, see this is so. I'm so glad
my clients aren't here because this is so because I
do a lot of clients.
Speaker 4 (29:23):
What are you up to?
Speaker 3 (29:25):
Well, I don't bump it, okay, do you know what?
You probably don't? My god, you want like, for instance,
you have a you actually do have a.
Speaker 7 (29:34):
Good mullet's cheery. Never had a cut?
Speaker 4 (29:41):
Oh, oh, I could tell it. It goes very long.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
Yeah, I can see that. So it would be if
you wanted, for instance, your hair at the back to have.
Although I'm worried about the flame, but it would be
if you wanted your hair at the back to have
a little lift. That's not what's important right now. I
have a client meeting later, okay, because I have some
new to announce.
Speaker 4 (30:01):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
I plan to be a senator and a soccer dad,
so I'm looking for a respectable Republican woman who can
fit into that. Though I also picture myself as a
single dad, so maybe someone also okay with divorce?
Speaker 4 (30:16):
Wait, you're.
Speaker 7 (30:18):
I have a message for Obambah.
Speaker 4 (30:21):
Fucked you.
Speaker 6 (30:24):
God?
Speaker 7 (30:24):
So I am on boor Wow.
Speaker 4 (30:27):
Mister Thornton, you can't throw yourself in the ring. I'm
on this date now, mister Thorton.
Speaker 5 (30:32):
Noware you mister, mister mister Thorp.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
I gotta tell you, mister Thornton.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
Mister Bruce Thorton, mister Thornton, mister Thornton.
Speaker 3 (30:41):
Do you mind if, mister Thornton, you don't know a
top hot do you like?
Speaker 5 (30:47):
Do you want to get ready for my mad Men party?
Speaker 3 (30:49):
I want to get ready for mad Men party. But
I also thought I could do like a hot air
balloon stop tour. Oh okay, promote my senatorial efforts.
Speaker 4 (30:56):
Oh that would be nice, like the monopoly man. You're
gonna be like the monopoly I actually what I brought
a menu.
Speaker 3 (31:02):
Of sushi, and I brought very liberal.
Speaker 4 (31:05):
Well, look, I want you to compare each of your
friends to the different sushi rolls on the menu.
Speaker 3 (31:12):
Yeah I can, Okay, mister Thornton is for sure one
of the fried vegetables at a Mommy, No, you know
they like Panco fried. He doesn't know.
Speaker 7 (31:22):
Do you like Tura? Have traveled too many areas?
Speaker 5 (31:29):
Not France.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
You went from Santa Fe to Japan to France. Wow?
Oh to close the loop? But they speak in France?
Is should I give you it?
Speaker 7 (31:43):
Please?
Speaker 4 (31:43):
Let's hear it.
Speaker 3 (31:44):
You'll like this. You're gonna have some moorgasm sounds.
Speaker 9 (31:50):
She did, being too coward.
Speaker 7 (32:10):
I want to look your eyeballs.
Speaker 5 (32:13):
You know what, mister Thornton, I have to tell you.
Speaker 3 (32:16):
Wait, whose eyeballs for mine?
Speaker 4 (32:19):
All four?
Speaker 1 (32:20):
Whoa?
Speaker 4 (32:21):
I gotta say, I mean, we're they're so dried out
for being up in the atmosphere that I could use
a little moisture.
Speaker 8 (32:27):
Actually, I'm with you, give them give give.
Speaker 7 (32:36):
Oh, wow, you need a little serum.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
On my eyeballs?
Speaker 7 (32:42):
Are my face?
Speaker 3 (32:43):
I gotta say? I can I double down on that? Actually,
I do have to say, like I understand on an
airplane's altitude drying out your skin. Your skin is very dry,
and your eyes look like did you see dune? No,
they look like that entire movie like.
Speaker 4 (33:01):
It this a sand dune, like it's just like a
stand like the Sahara desert. Yeah, listen, you're eating so
much sushi. Can I just say, you know, if you
don't eat as much, your stomach will start shrinking and
you train your body to lose that extra weight.
Speaker 3 (33:16):
Okay, listen, fertile hips.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
Okay, sand dune face.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Listen, sand dune face needing serum, fertile hips. I take
that as a compliment.
Speaker 4 (33:27):
Okay, Okay, you need to compare it. I need to
hear another one of your friends on sushi. Let's hear
another role. I need one more friend of yours.
Speaker 5 (33:34):
To compare it to the many.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
I have a friend named Carrie under Bake. She ran
for governor and herself.
Speaker 5 (33:43):
Oh, you hang out with other other politicians.
Speaker 3 (33:47):
Other politicians. I only hang out with newscasters who become politicians.
They already know how to do their makeup.
Speaker 5 (33:52):
Sure, okay, okay, So.
Speaker 3 (33:54):
Carrie Lake to me would be at a sushi restaurant.
Uh huh, she would be chicken karaokey. Why because she's
not sushi ham me. You know what I mean. She's
the real America. She's the real America. She's better than
she's the real America.
Speaker 4 (34:12):
You said that I was surprised you were going to
wear your Make America a great hat on the balloon,
and that you were going to remove it for a
top hat.
Speaker 5 (34:18):
But it looks great.
Speaker 3 (34:19):
I left a mental institution last week, and I only
came with the clothes in.
Speaker 5 (34:23):
My back, okay, from the institution or to the I
wore that.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
All the clothes they had were from the institution.
Speaker 4 (34:30):
Okay, So did you get back the ones that you
went in with her?
Speaker 5 (34:32):
Did they just give you any old closes?
Speaker 3 (34:33):
Going really fast? I gotta tell you, I don't like
the speed and the wind chill, and I didn't bring
any mold on.
Speaker 7 (34:39):
Let me because I have a confession to make.
Speaker 3 (34:42):
He's just making money.
Speaker 7 (34:45):
No, that wasn't me. Helium.
Speaker 3 (34:48):
Okay, are we sure it's helium?
Speaker 6 (34:53):
I want to I think it's okay, Okay, balloons.
Speaker 4 (34:56):
I chose aerospace engineering as my major because it was
the only thing I couldn't learn on YouTube.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Well, my ex of three years and I broke up
two weeks ago because she got in a fight with
my mom. Would you'd never do something like that?
Speaker 6 (35:10):
Right?
Speaker 5 (35:10):
I haven't met your mom?
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Is your mom?
Speaker 3 (35:12):
She's great? Actually? Actually? Can we make a quick pip
stop to my pip stop?
Speaker 5 (35:18):
Can we have to make a gris Can we make
a gri.
Speaker 7 (35:21):
That week? Definitely make quick grizzd Let's go make a.
Speaker 4 (35:23):
Grizzit and drag across his mom's and I want to
meet his mom. Okay, all right, let's go crashing your
mom's love for a grizzit.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
Got to my mom's house. Are those orgasms sounds?
Speaker 4 (35:43):
I was landing?
Speaker 3 (35:43):
I know. I know me too, So that's how you land.
Before I knock the door, I passed out halfway through
before okay, before I knock on the door, I want
to tell you something.
Speaker 5 (35:52):
I want to tell you something to.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
First of all, I love that you're so comfortable being
yourself and you're not ashamed of all bast I am
I on meth right now.
Speaker 7 (36:03):
Oops, we're all a little weird. I eat my toenails.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
Okay, mister Thornton, nobody asked you.
Speaker 7 (36:10):
I'm just.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
That is actually feeling that is.
Speaker 7 (36:15):
Come on, we're all sharing.
Speaker 5 (36:16):
I didn't say anything like that. I I look, I
lied though.
Speaker 4 (36:20):
I'm not really a haird stylist or an aerospace engineer.
I'm a line cook at a restaurant, but I'm really
a music producer.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
Okay, all right, Look, my ex of three years and
I broke up two weeks ago because I got my mom.
You right, do not I'm borning you. When I knock
on the story answers, do not do not fight with them?
Speaker 4 (36:42):
Okay, everything, I'm gonna do that.
Speaker 3 (36:44):
Okay, let me do my signature.
Speaker 4 (36:45):
Not are you kidding me? Is it really.
Speaker 3 (36:59):
Look beautiful?
Speaker 5 (37:02):
Did you guys just kiss on the mouth?
Speaker 4 (37:04):
So why did you kiss your son.
Speaker 3 (37:06):
On the mouth? Gross? Yeah, we're very intimately connected and
it's not like that. Okay, And I'm not gonna I'm
not gonna say your.
Speaker 4 (37:14):
Mom's robe is open, so what she's not? She came
out with an open.
Speaker 7 (37:20):
Robe and show you?
Speaker 3 (37:24):
Why did you tell her what you wanted to show?
Speaker 9 (37:26):
Well?
Speaker 7 (37:26):
I look how amazing my body is.
Speaker 3 (37:28):
It looks great. Okay, listen to my mother.
Speaker 4 (37:31):
I'm sorry I would.
Speaker 3 (37:33):
I don't bring it up because she'll hate you.
Speaker 6 (37:35):
Is this?
Speaker 5 (37:36):
Oh Hi, I'm not I am.
Speaker 4 (37:42):
I am a line and cook at a restaurant, but
I'm really a music producer. And listen, I have to say,
your son has been so rude. Your son has been
so rude on this day. He told me that my
skin needed seerum that my face look at this?
Speaker 7 (38:01):
How did you raise?
Speaker 3 (38:02):
Can you speak up here? Tell them that you're the
one who said to think about the seering.
Speaker 6 (38:06):
My stepmom was a bitch, So I am staying out
of this one. I have no reference point for family.
I just stay up in the air and I stay
out of it.
Speaker 3 (38:18):
So, mister Thornton, honestly, we have to be a little
more sensitive. Mister Thornton's stepmom was a bitch. Whenever he
sees a panics.
Speaker 5 (38:24):
But maybe there's sparks there.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
Maybe there's gonna be chemistry between mister Thornton and your mister.
Are you single, mister.
Speaker 7 (38:31):
Thornton, I am single by choice, but I am happy
to okay.
Speaker 4 (38:38):
You want to mean waahoo, he's horning.
Speaker 3 (38:44):
He's mom. Say hi to mister Thornton.
Speaker 4 (38:47):
Hello, he just kissed her on the mouth. Mister Thornton,
You've got to ask you cannot just go in.
Speaker 7 (38:52):
But she has all of her everything out. She's an
open person. God, well, why don't you come on in?
Let me explain to you how I make espresso. We
little coffee. Excuse us.
Speaker 3 (39:16):
You to be mom before you get mom, before you go,
before you go, because this is this is I want
to know. First of all? Will you explain to us
how to make espress?
Speaker 8 (39:28):
Ye?
Speaker 6 (39:29):
Please explain it all right, come on over here, okay, okay,
close the door or the robe.
Speaker 3 (39:36):
Yeah you know what we will private okay, okay, okay,
she want us to You and.
Speaker 6 (39:44):
Mister Thornton need if you two want to go back
up in the balloon without me, feel free?
Speaker 4 (39:51):
Fine?
Speaker 3 (39:52):
Okay, by mister Thornton's really something to me.
Speaker 4 (39:55):
Yes, bye, mister Thornton. I'll never forget you, mister Thornton.
Speaker 3 (39:59):
Mom, before before you go, can you sing us a duet? Yeah?
Speaker 5 (40:04):
Well you sing us a duet of what was.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
The song you were up with? Bad Romance?
Speaker 4 (40:09):
Bad Romance?
Speaker 3 (40:10):
Okay?
Speaker 8 (40:11):
Will you sing jingle bells a duet? I know it's
the data summer, do it harmonized?
Speaker 7 (40:19):
I listened to jingle bells.
Speaker 5 (40:20):
I love jingle much blotting common.
Speaker 7 (40:24):
Jingle jingle, bells, bells, bells, bells jingle the.
Speaker 3 (40:33):
Wow all right YouTube love birds. Okay, let's go back
into the hot air balloon.
Speaker 4 (40:40):
I saw this on YouTube. I actually didn't get my
engineering degree. I saw I watched how to Operate a
Hot air Balloon on YouTube?
Speaker 3 (40:47):
Oh you did? So can you take me to.
Speaker 5 (40:52):
I want to say, you know, I washed my sheets
just in case, and I shaved.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
What are you wearing under your dress?
Speaker 4 (41:00):
Spanks?
Speaker 3 (41:01):
Someone said that on the date.
Speaker 4 (41:04):
I forgot.
Speaker 7 (41:05):
I can't stay. I have to get my dog's anal
glands expressed. Do you know what that means?
Speaker 4 (41:11):
It's like fun fact my mother the first and only
time she got high in her sixties, She's like, we
smoked pot and then we drained my dog's anal glands.
Speaker 3 (41:22):
That's I gotta say. That is the most turned on
I've been all day. Mister Thornton. Take us back to
my place. You know the zip code.
Speaker 4 (41:29):
I can't wait to be I can't wait to be
divorced from a senator.
Speaker 3 (41:33):
You're gonna love it. You're gonna wait.
Speaker 7 (41:37):
Quick question. Who is that Morris's missed that one?
Speaker 4 (41:47):
Sure we go, We're back. Okay, Stephanie. Yes, Brian and
I are trying to become lifestyle influencers. Brian is our care,
(42:07):
we're bakers. Brian's gonna make you a pybe fit. They're
not our sponsor, and they, I think, will not sponsor us.
Speaker 5 (42:14):
But we're trying.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
We're still trying.
Speaker 5 (42:15):
I know you're vegan. Did you bring what did you
bring from your kitchen?
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Okay?
Speaker 7 (42:19):
I brought some cinnamon.
Speaker 3 (42:20):
Have you ever seen this?
Speaker 7 (42:21):
Never?
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Okay? All it is is dehydrated peanuts. Are you allergic
to peanuts?
Speaker 6 (42:25):
No?
Speaker 3 (42:25):
Okay, too bad?
Speaker 7 (42:28):
Too bad, I'm not allergic.
Speaker 3 (42:31):
When I say this every week and I preach this
to my clients, Yes week, we make a peanut butter cake.
Now this is really if you mixed it with water,
it would just be peanut butter. Sure, except it has
Instead of having one hundred and ninety calories were serving,
it has sixty. Okay, instead of having seven grands approacheines eight.
And instead of having sixteen sixteen grams of that, it
(42:52):
has two. Get a load of them.
Speaker 6 (42:53):
About the carbohydrates, who carbohydrates has that's the main one.
Speaker 4 (42:57):
It does have six carbohydrates, Okay, six cabohydrates, So all.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
I'm gonna do simple, So today we're doing.
Speaker 4 (43:04):
I'm gonna you're the cook today because you yelled at
me last time when I.
Speaker 3 (43:07):
Touched it, you coked both. Last time you did a
fantastic Yeah you really did. So all I'm doing to this,
as everyone can see, there's nothing in my hands except
this new model of.
Speaker 4 (43:17):
Water, so I'm also practicing magic.
Speaker 3 (43:20):
I am. So I'm putting this here, okay, and then
I'm just mixed, mixed mix, you know what I mean,
Like you could do this.
Speaker 4 (43:26):
For you know, Grid Junkle or you know, if you're
grizziting your gritch, uncle.
Speaker 3 (43:30):
You're grizziting your grit. Okay, easy enough, right.
Speaker 4 (43:33):
Nope, nothing in my hand.
Speaker 5 (43:36):
No, Stephanie, how did you think that date went?
Speaker 3 (43:39):
Now?
Speaker 7 (43:39):
I thought that was pretty good?
Speaker 5 (43:41):
Good?
Speaker 4 (43:42):
Good?
Speaker 3 (43:42):
Is that?
Speaker 5 (43:43):
How how you and your bride was that? Your first date?
Was it an exact replica.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
You to me?
Speaker 7 (43:48):
Can you say, yeah, we met on it? Well, we
met on a movie.
Speaker 6 (43:52):
Of course.
Speaker 3 (43:54):
It was like, yes, fantastic, We're sparks flying pretty quickly.
Speaker 6 (43:59):
No, I mean we really got along and we laugh
like laughed a lot, but definitely.
Speaker 7 (44:04):
Uh. I thought I was straight and she had a
girlfriend and so right to take a second.
Speaker 3 (44:10):
Do you all still make each other laugh? No?
Speaker 7 (44:15):
No, nothing?
Speaker 4 (44:16):
She could possibly say nothing, hears.
Speaker 7 (44:21):
I've loved air for years.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
What was the line that made you most shocked that
you heard from the listener's emailing it?
Speaker 7 (44:31):
Well, I will say I.
Speaker 6 (44:32):
Think my favorite is well, actually have two looking at this,
I like your hips have fertile vibes.
Speaker 5 (44:39):
That's amazing. That is so wild, that is so wide.
Speaker 3 (44:43):
You get to pick this is another thing that's very
fun for the guests. You get to pick pure vanilla
extract or pure vanilla, Mexican vanilla extract, Madagascar Bourbon villa
extract or tahitia. None of it has alcohol.
Speaker 7 (44:56):
I'll go with Madagascar bourbon though.
Speaker 4 (44:59):
So did you have any bad things said to you
on dates? And did you have like good self care
on dates? What do you mean like did you like
yourself when you were dating enough? Because we also in
this segment as lifestyle influence ors, we talk about self
care this did.
Speaker 3 (45:14):
You ask the question which someone else pointed out there?
Speaker 5 (45:17):
But do do I like them? Rather than do they
like me?
Speaker 3 (45:19):
I hope they? Did you say I hope they like me?
Or did you say I hope I like them.
Speaker 6 (45:23):
I this is a no autographs moment for myself because
I think, not knowing I was gay, I was only
dating men. Yeah, and uh, I had a lot of
confidence because I was like, I don't give a shit.
Speaker 7 (45:37):
Yeah, I say I didn't. I was like, how do
I figure this out?
Speaker 6 (45:44):
And I think it made me very desirable to men,
which was odd in return, cause she doesn't give a shit.
Speaker 5 (45:51):
She didn't care that.
Speaker 4 (45:52):
Yeah. I feel like that we should all take some
of that energy and be like she doesn't care, you know,
like that's kind of hot.
Speaker 6 (46:00):
And I really thought that was part of my personality,
whereas now I'm like, oh, if I was dating women,
I would have been a psychopath.
Speaker 3 (46:06):
Of course, she would have been nervous about everybody. I
get it. I've never dated a woman as an adult.
Speaker 5 (46:13):
I thought we dated for two years.
Speaker 3 (46:14):
For two years, and then I lobbed that on you.
It's like with everything I think, like, you're a comedian
and also an actress and also a producer and also
a director, and all of you aren't you. Yes. I
sometimes think when you do more things, not one of
them is so precious you're scared of it anymore, Like well,
if that doesn't pan out, it sucks. But it's also okay,
yeah you know what I mean. Yeah, you're not going
(46:34):
into rooms freaking out.
Speaker 7 (46:36):
Yes, But I think it's interesting in life.
Speaker 6 (46:39):
And I think this with friends or any relationships where
it's like weird when you really like someone, Yeah, what
is that?
Speaker 7 (46:46):
It's like all of a sudden, you're like, wait, what
am I supposed.
Speaker 6 (46:48):
To do with this?
Speaker 4 (46:50):
It's vulnerable.
Speaker 6 (46:51):
Yeah, But then I look at my kids who are
six and a half, and like they when they have
a new friend, You're my friend.
Speaker 7 (46:59):
I like you so much. They run toward each other
and they're like, I love you. They hug each other.
It's so joyful, like, and I go, I think I
feel that way about people, like but I can't do that.
Speaker 6 (47:11):
I know.
Speaker 4 (47:12):
I have no game.
Speaker 5 (47:13):
I mean I have I have no poker face. So
if I like you, I'm like, I like you.
Speaker 7 (47:19):
I like I think it's nice.
Speaker 4 (47:21):
But then sometimes so I was married for a long
time and then I went on a bunch of dates
and I didn't really like getny of the people that much.
And then now I'm in my first relationship, so it's
been ten months, and then sometimes I'm watching I'm like,
I'm like, oh I get my garden shut.
Speaker 5 (47:37):
The fuck, like, just zip it.
Speaker 3 (47:40):
I do have to say, it's a huge mistake. You
didn't meet anyone at like UCP or one of the
comedy theaters and get very serious with them, you know,
because they're so nice.
Speaker 4 (47:49):
Because it all really okaya, I don't I want to
see if it's I feel like.
Speaker 5 (47:53):
It's little we got.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
I think this is good.
Speaker 4 (47:55):
Okay, it's like it's a pudding.
Speaker 6 (47:57):
List, but that kind of vender juice, the jew the
energy of like I hate myself so therefore I hate
you more.
Speaker 4 (48:03):
Yes, all gonna eat it?
Speaker 5 (48:05):
Okay, Okay, now you go first.
Speaker 7 (48:08):
This is actually pretty good.
Speaker 3 (48:12):
You don't even know, I will say, And I always
like it, yeah, we always, but sometimes people don't.
Speaker 7 (48:18):
This is your powder, vanilla and cinnamon and water.
Speaker 3 (48:21):
And a little bit of cocoa powder, just a little bit.
Oh I like that. Yeah, it's not it shouldn't be gross.
I hope like you could be a lot.
Speaker 5 (48:30):
Stephanie Mike Castle gave it a ten.
Speaker 3 (48:32):
Lauren Laptus gave it.
Speaker 4 (48:33):
A Two's very is that possible?
Speaker 3 (48:36):
She gave it a two? But we made a different
kind for her. We put an egg white and then
we put pumpkin.
Speaker 5 (48:42):
But I did well last week with the egg.
Speaker 3 (48:45):
We have a we have a long standing feud about
the egg white.
Speaker 4 (48:48):
I got two tens last week.
Speaker 7 (48:52):
Okay, I'm not a huge chocolate person. I should give
it a nine.
Speaker 4 (49:03):
At fifteen because she didn't even like chocolate.
Speaker 3 (49:06):
Children have because you know them? Do you think they
have the palate for something like that? Would you serve
this to children? En Mass?
Speaker 5 (49:14):
And we serve this to children?
Speaker 4 (49:16):
Can we serve I guess my guests, we don't know
any children we need that?
Speaker 3 (49:21):
Dony child improvisers?
Speaker 1 (49:24):
Are you?
Speaker 9 (49:25):
You're not?
Speaker 4 (49:25):
And I like you so much?
Speaker 5 (49:26):
Kind of a person you're not? And I like you
so much?
Speaker 3 (49:29):
You mean a relationships of them? I gotta say, but
I think something missing with me? Were like I always
date perfectly wonderful people that I cannot cross over with.
Speaker 6 (49:37):
No.
Speaker 7 (49:38):
Do do you look at people and go like from afar, like,
do you think you have it in you?
Speaker 6 (49:43):
No?
Speaker 5 (49:43):
He doesn't.
Speaker 3 (49:44):
I hope I have. I hope I have it in me.
But I've never had a crush. It's very odd.
Speaker 4 (49:49):
I've told you that. That's okay, we've discussed this I
remember you've been hard on yourself about that.
Speaker 3 (49:54):
But I've been in therapy forever.
Speaker 4 (49:55):
But you've had a.
Speaker 5 (49:56):
Strong feelings for people.
Speaker 3 (49:58):
Yeah, no, I have.
Speaker 4 (49:59):
I have because because I know because you've been hurt,
so you you if you were, you might have a
different word for it.
Speaker 5 (50:06):
And maybe it's self protection.
Speaker 4 (50:08):
Like I'm sure you probably had to be in the
closet growing off like all that, Like just knowing your background,
I'm sure it wasn't safe to be like I have
a crush on so and so I haven't Like I'm
sure that felt maybe not safe in Texas growing up
at that time. So perhaps now, look, we are wiring,
is what it is. But like I know that people
have certainly hurt your feelings, that's true.
Speaker 7 (50:29):
So introverted, like do you like being alone more?
Speaker 6 (50:32):
I think that's hard because then the relationship you're kind
of like, wait, you're intruding on my favorite thing.
Speaker 2 (50:41):
You know.
Speaker 5 (50:44):
I do like to be alone.
Speaker 3 (50:44):
I do love it.
Speaker 5 (50:45):
I like to be alone.
Speaker 7 (50:46):
So I feel like you need someone that doesn't.
Speaker 3 (50:48):
I don't know your wife really and all except from
her work and I've met her a couple of times,
but I get the sense that she could be the
same way.
Speaker 6 (50:54):
So maybe that's yeah, like we were alone together and
it still feels good.
Speaker 7 (50:58):
That's not I feel like, oh god, I'm like ignoring
this person.
Speaker 5 (51:02):
No, no, no, no, you need you need somebody that
can be I need a few hours a day alone.
Speaker 3 (51:06):
Yeah, oh yeah, I have to.
Speaker 4 (51:08):
When we travel together, we separate and then we come
back together and watch Judge, Judy and Jeopardy.
Speaker 3 (51:14):
You gotta hang out with us. We're so fun? Are fun? Fish?
From five pm to nine pm? Then ardens up til four, eight.
Speaker 4 (51:20):
Four, and then you're up at five am and he
goes on his long walk.
Speaker 7 (51:23):
Do we want till four?
Speaker 4 (51:24):
I'm at night owl, living my life on it, trying
on everything. I oh, googling people. I hate buying things
on Amazon. Uh, you know, watching trash TV.
Speaker 7 (51:35):
And no, I don't get up.
Speaker 5 (51:37):
I get up at like eight or nine.
Speaker 4 (51:38):
I'm tired, but then I can take a disco nap.
Speaker 3 (51:42):
Yeah, yeah, thank you for being here.
Speaker 7 (51:47):
Where can people find you?
Speaker 3 (51:50):
Nowhere only and everything? But where do you want people
throw you? On Instagramer?
Speaker 6 (51:54):
You don't Stephanie Allen and your last name is spelled
with a y, yeah in a double N and a
double L.
Speaker 3 (52:02):
Pronounced Alan double l.
Speaker 7 (52:05):
Why double n my middle name, so my parents made
it up so weird.
Speaker 6 (52:11):
I like that.
Speaker 4 (52:12):
You'll be getting a grizzit from me on Instagram.
Speaker 3 (52:15):
Jeffany, thank you so much.
Speaker 9 (52:18):
Guys.
Speaker 4 (52:22):
Hey, you guys, don't forget you can like, listen, review
and subscribe to us.
Speaker 5 (52:27):
And it really helps, doesn't it, Brian?
Speaker 3 (52:29):
It absolutely does. It gets the attention of the people
at Apple, and they'll say, why don't we feature this.
Speaker 5 (52:34):
These these why don't I feature these these cakes? Guess what,
We're over three hundred stars already, we are.
Speaker 4 (52:40):
Really here's one that's five stats BlackBerry Mirror. I follow
Brian that's you over from Attitudes and ask Ronner with
Rona and Bryan because I cannot get enough of his
unhinged energy. Aden is an effervescent and a comedic treasure.
I have to listen at home or in the cat
because I frequently cackle while listening.
Speaker 3 (53:03):
Daisy O Day says, I came for the stars, but
stay for the peanut butter pumpkin cake that Arden and
Brian truly believe tastes good.
Speaker 4 (53:09):
Best theme song, five Stars Jerry Shank I can't get
it out of my head.
Speaker 5 (53:14):
I love it.
Speaker 4 (53:15):
There's two music signs. I love the hectic energy served here,
keep it coming, naps energy, Baby.
Speaker 3 (53:21):
We love you, and also Daisy O Days says their
earnest approach to each by to the disgusted sounding guests
makes me cry laughing. I hope they never dropped the
recipe part because it's my favorite part. We never will.
We literally just to believe that even if an army
told us to stop, we wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (53:36):
Literally. This sad thing is people who have traveled with
us doctor Bananas. One of them are for Jessicer stef
Stphanie Stphanie, all of them, we're like, the first thing,
we're like, oh my, it was like two children running
at them covered peanut butter powder, going no, no, no,
We're gonna cook for you.
Speaker 5 (53:54):
We're to cook for you.
Speaker 4 (53:55):
And all of them are like, what the fuck is this?
Speaker 7 (53:57):
You like this?
Speaker 5 (53:59):
But some of the people have liked it.
Speaker 4 (54:00):
Myke Castle liked it, and so did Stephanie Allen.
Speaker 3 (54:04):
Stephanie Allen liked it.
Speaker 5 (54:05):
They all have to break up with Laura Lopkez.
Speaker 3 (54:08):
She's the root of people's out.
Speaker 4 (54:11):
She's jealous, jealous they were great bacons.
Speaker 3 (54:14):
Jealous. She's jealous.
Speaker 4 (54:15):
She's jealous about great Silver, like, gosh, it our great
Los Angeles, a great Hollywood bakeoff.
Speaker 3 (54:23):
You tell him, baby.
Speaker 4 (54:24):
By the way, we are overwhelmed, like it's so fun
now that the podcast is going and we're getting real
lines from our listeners. Okay, so I had a bunch
of lines from I'm gonna probably say this wrong. Guerist
Megan Delaney, Gabby Rooram Bayrend, Betsy Lee, Anna French, Adrian Ashby,
Shelle Shelby Heart and Alison T.
Speaker 3 (54:47):
Wilmington Drive, Irene Binder, Mishmed sl Mary Bennett a Brian Reaper,
Shelley Puri too, Charles Rogers, who's the future guest on
the show? Amy two twenty four hundred and impressed much?
Kaylen mclock Lynn, Jack Attack Picks and Stephanie said some
from Instagram Francisco, Alex Clink Thinks, Becca Gasolia, Uncle, Jenny
(55:10):
zach Lemmy, Alison Launch, d Mer Steele, John are you okay?
Shady Rose Diplo Human, Lily Glickstein, Kevin Walldrop, what did
Charles crispy?
Speaker 5 (55:24):
What was Charles's Jennifer.
Speaker 3 (55:26):
Lynn Armstrong, Oh my god, you have a lot well
these are Stephanie's what will I see?
Speaker 6 (55:30):
What was it?
Speaker 5 (55:30):
What was Charles's line?
Speaker 3 (55:32):
I left a mental institution last week?
Speaker 9 (55:34):
Wow?
Speaker 5 (55:34):
We need to ask him about that. That's so fun.
Speaker 3 (55:37):
And of course, of course, of course you know who
you are. Okay, great, all right, we'll see you next week.
Speaker 4 (55:45):
Yeah, And if you want to simmon lines to forget,
follow us on Instagram, naps pod, or email us napspod
the number one at gmail dot com.
Speaker 3 (55:52):
Anna. Thank you to Katie, Thank you to Sergio Lopus
for our socials, and thank you to the fabulous who
wrote our themes.
Speaker 4 (55:57):
Mark Rivers, we love you.
Speaker 3 (55:58):
No please? Who are you wearing?
Speaker 1 (56:03):
Will there be pressed to Alex Fabia, Yeah, Gotchagin and Brian,
I hear it. Last there'd be a mess.
Speaker 2 (56:14):
And they've got lots of podcast but honey, no, no, no, no,
Hono grass piece. We live in in the camel lifel
like celebrities and sharing other favorite FEMI recipes.
Speaker 3 (56:28):
But honey, no, no, no, no autographs. I got a
No, who are you wearing? Will there be pressed to Alethabi?
She coney, Yeah, didn't and Bryan, I hear it last
there and they've got lat of podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
But honey, no, no, no, no, honor grass pees. We
live in legamon life celebrities and sharing our favorite FEB recipes.
But honey, no, no, no, no auntographs, no.
Speaker 3 (00:41):
Autograph there, no autograph.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
Hello, welcome to another episode of No Autographs Please.
Speaker 5 (00:47):
My name is Arto Marine.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I'm Brent Sappy. I know we say this every week,
but it legitimately feels like I haven't seen you in
a year, but I think I did. I just see
you last week.
Speaker 4 (00:54):
I know, but it's been a long time and I
feel it.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
No I change.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
I feel like I've you've changed.
Speaker 5 (00:58):
I've changed.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
I have a lot of contouring now. I put a
full face.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
On a face I know. And you've been stealing from
NeiMa Marcus. I was there earlier and they said, don't
you do that show with her Green?
Speaker 4 (01:06):
I did. I'm like, I'm a Wanona writer of two
thousand and five. Remember she didn't know what was.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
So chic about pa I'll tell you why. Stephanie Allen.
Speaker 5 (01:16):
Okay, wait.
Speaker 4 (01:19):
From the l word. You know her from One Mississippi.
She's an actor, a writer or director, comedian. She was
for years on a classic comedy team with Lauren lopkez
Our Queens Anymore.
Speaker 6 (01:32):
Stephanie online that I had to move on.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
Lauren.
Speaker 5 (01:41):
Okay, wait, so we're writer.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
Okay, Stephanie, I don't know if you ever knew this.
Speaker 5 (01:45):
Do you know the sex?
Speaker 3 (01:46):
I yes, no.
Speaker 7 (01:47):
No, no, it was about her crime.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
Also about her crime, so you know she was stealing
from sex and what she was stealing mostly was Mark
Jacob's clothing. Great, he got so much press out of this.
He told her, you never have to pay for another
one on my out. And she's at that Mark Jacob's
store no less than once a week getting things altered.
Oh yeah, she's there all the time. I see her
in Johnson Third. I mean I don't see her. I
(02:14):
saw her.
Speaker 5 (02:14):
Once, okay, because I think apparently bankrupt.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Someone then told me someone then told me she's there
all the time.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Okay. Now, I heard years ago for her, long before
Pharah fawce Ha got called out for being a little
sticky fingers. I heard before it was in the press
that she I think it was also at SAX. I
think SAX knew and like they basically were like let
her do it, like like and they would just sort
of send the bills to allegedly to the business manager
and like, let her do it.
Speaker 6 (02:44):
I've seen the tape of Winona Ryder, Like when you
see the video, it's like, what.
Speaker 7 (02:48):
Is she doing?
Speaker 3 (02:49):
Like, no, I know what you mean, because like there was.
Speaker 6 (02:54):
Always people going like no, you know, celebrities, they're used
to not paying. They go in, they have like an agreement,
and then you watch it and you're like.
Speaker 5 (03:01):
No, it's a thrill.
Speaker 7 (03:02):
Yeah, she's actually doing.
Speaker 4 (03:04):
Says like a high I think there was a there
was like a book that came out Go to a
b or something, and it was like it was like
the thrill of it's the thrill.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
One with Captain Ahab exactly. What's that one called? That's
the one that.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Whale had sticky fingering. Your conjouring looks great, Brian?
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Did you very much? Did tell you what I did
do today? Talk to me and I don't like to
talk trade secrets.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Sure, okay, he's a celebrity.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I was just in l past, so okay, his.
Speaker 4 (03:38):
Eyes are closed business.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
I was visiting my family what do you tell all
your clients? I tell all my clients, visit your family
and then come back and openly weep for three hours,
because even though nothing happened, everything happened.
Speaker 4 (03:49):
You know, if you do not have a crying jag
after visiting your family, then they didn't raise a funny kid.
You have to have that much.
Speaker 5 (03:56):
Damn right, you need a three.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Even it wasn't even traumatic or anything.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
How is your relationship with you fast?
Speaker 7 (04:03):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (04:04):
Who's the tricky? 's the tricky one?
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Do you visit them?
Speaker 6 (04:07):
Ever?
Speaker 5 (04:07):
My dead dad is a tricky one.
Speaker 7 (04:09):
Okay.
Speaker 6 (04:09):
I'm really close with my family, so I see them
a lot. But then we have all the ship goes down?
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Or where were you raised?
Speaker 4 (04:17):
I'm just I know up north. I like to think
of her as North Carolina. She's she's Northern California. I
heard she's La California. See you, You're like, it's got
to be.
Speaker 5 (04:32):
California.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
I thought I always thought Greenland. Is that not true?
Speaker 4 (04:35):
I heard I heard North Norfoundland.
Speaker 5 (04:39):
You're from l A.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
You're from There's no way. I can't think does.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
That makes sense? Both my parents are from l A.
I was born in Arcadia. I lived in Temecula, which
is Inland, Orange County. My parents were Orange County and
then I lived in Buffalo where my bike it's right
wing Christian.
Speaker 4 (04:59):
There you go.
Speaker 7 (05:00):
So because hot air balloons wineries. But yes, do you remember.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
Speaking of hot air balloons, do you remember that fake
falcon kid that was in like the hot air the
fake by balloon boy that was kind of an autograss please,
It's like the guy built the fake space ship that
kind of looked like a Jiffy pop thing and his
son's falcon but he was so he was, but he
was on land. He wasn't up there. That's so who
is the who's the tricky one?
Speaker 7 (05:25):
I mean I think we all take our moments that's fair. Yeah, yeah,
I don't.
Speaker 6 (05:29):
We don't have like the one that's okay where we
all go. I mean maybe you know what extended fam like, okay,
aunts and uncles, some who's not toy Mama probably.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
I mean, I don't know every I sort of agree
with you that everyone is a little tricky and a
little this or that. Actually my first photographs please nomination
is actually and I've done her before, but my mom
this time said, I want to do you a favor
tell me and I was like, And by the way,
when my mom says that, I'm like, oh god, I
have to go make her phone involved in whatever about
(06:02):
to I can't wait. And she goes, well, I figured
you should clean out my closet now before I die
so you won't have to do it later.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
My mom made me do that, by the way, and it.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
Took twelve hours, and I did it like an idiot.
Speaker 5 (06:12):
I made you that.
Speaker 4 (06:13):
She made me clean out the attic so that it
was clean when she died, and it was.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
And my mom is not even ill, Like okay, my mom.
Speaker 6 (06:21):
Her parents died twenty years apart from each other. Yeah,
she still has the ashes of both of them, is
still trying to figure out the funeral to plan and
is certified in functionuey and then put the ashes in
her helpful people corner of her home.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
What is that's a helpful I need one of those.
Speaker 6 (06:41):
Like if you like in function, your house has like
a bogwa over it, so you have like one area's health,
one area is money, one.
Speaker 4 (06:47):
Area helpful people and people.
Speaker 6 (06:49):
I like that.
Speaker 7 (06:50):
And she just has like a box of ashes. It's
not even like and it's just like the box.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
You know that there are dolls and I forget the
name them that you stick in the courts.
Speaker 7 (07:01):
Dolls.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
No, they're like life sized dolls. But they don't have faces.
I know everyone thinks I'm lying at where it's true.
You need to stick them around your house because you
just see the back of their heads and it makes
you It's for people who feel lonely. No, it's horrible.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Oh that's sad.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
Yeah, but they don't have faces. I don't know why.
I think it's too expensive.
Speaker 4 (07:19):
Yeah, you don't want to pay extra for the face.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
You just need a head.
Speaker 4 (07:21):
Now, may I do the first?
Speaker 5 (07:24):
Not autogos?
Speaker 7 (07:24):
Please energy for the week.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Okay, Just thinking of extended family, I've decided to nominate
my paternal grandmother, who was just almost like a mommy
dearest kind of. She had delusions of grandeur. She thought
she was hot. She looked like she was one hundred
when she was like forty.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
When we would watch she was so old.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
She when she died, there was just like cigarette burns
all over her mattress, you know what I mean. Because
she would just fall asleep like chainsmoking and watching TV.
She had a car that had suicide doors that like
open belt, yes, but so she this is the move.
Though my parents were married I guess fifty years. Never
once did she say call me mom, call me Helen.
(08:07):
My mother had to call her missus marine until she died.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Missus Marine.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Her mom, her my dad's mom. She had to call
missus marine. She could never call her Helen. Oh Mom,
it was missus marine until she'd be like, yes, missus Marine, okay.
There was never like please call me Helen. She was
missus marine.
Speaker 8 (08:31):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (08:31):
By the way, also our beautiful production team Katie and Anna.
Anna sounds like she's drunk because she's hammered. And she
also went to bedet.
Speaker 7 (08:40):
No, what do you think of that?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
No autograss please energy pretty fresh?
Speaker 3 (08:44):
I mean, do your children call you missus Allen only.
Speaker 5 (08:50):
Missus Allen? Mama, mama.
Speaker 6 (08:53):
I have such like, I like love of people like
that though, where I'm like, oh, they just hold on
to that ship. Yeah, and it seems kind of fun. Yeah,
you're kind of like, all right, we're going to live
in this world.
Speaker 4 (09:06):
Were doing this?
Speaker 7 (09:07):
The formality is like almost and.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
They really when you do that, they really do control
the narrative. Like when you are asking to be called
missus something or mister something. It's your world, Yeah, it
really is.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
She also like was not fancy at all. And then
she but she delusion a branchure, but she wanted to
be so that she would send like an itemized list
when she was older. Of she was like, I need
like two hundred dollars, and she would itemize what it
was for, so it was like seventy five dollars like
town and country subscription, and then like one hundred and
twenty five.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
She died before Venmo. You would get so.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
Many a town of country and then oxygen. Oxygen was
after a town like it was just the She wanted
to be society, but wasn't like the missus marine of
it all.
Speaker 5 (09:50):
The town that's a real no audog gossa please energy.
Speaker 7 (09:53):
I love that.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
I was six. We used to grizz it my great
grade an. We called it grizzly hypertextas we A did
you this week. I had a wonderful grizzit. But I
went to grizzit my great great I'll tell you what
bugs me. I never know. I grew up on aunt
and I never know whether to say.
Speaker 5 (10:15):
I say an you do?
Speaker 3 (10:16):
What do you say?
Speaker 7 (10:16):
See I say, Anne, but I would love if someone
like it's it's aunt.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
Honestly, feel like.
Speaker 4 (10:21):
That's that's Allen energy. Aunt is real, Miss Allen.
Speaker 7 (10:25):
I like that.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
So we went to go visit her. Her name was
Dody Dorothy, but everyone called her Dody, which is basically like, hey,
you're way too much of an asshole to be a
Dorothy exactly, You're a jerk. When I was six years old,
she'd be like, here, come here, and I'd be terrified.
She was gonk, give me a kiss.
Speaker 4 (10:42):
She came here, sounds like I'm going to show you
a baby. Show me on the doll where Jody touched you.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
She was in a nursing home. My family makes and
family full of kleptomaniacs. I used to steal stuff from
my aunt all the time, but have to a rider.
Actually yes, but I used to still throw pillow from
Nema Marcus. Yeah, it was like six, you did, Yeah
I would. But this was the day. This was the day.
Who was president? Trying to think Ford, No, he wasn't Nixon.
(11:09):
This was the day when you know what, it's not
important titant.
Speaker 4 (11:15):
We met on the Titanic going down. He tried to
drown me, but I stayed to float and then I
made a marrine.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
I think it was Nixon because that was right when
I walked through the water. It was Nixon. And so anyway, okay.
So she would say to me, I need you to
steal packets of salt and bring them to me, and
then she would say cigarettes. But I couldn't really give
my hand on cigarettes. But I used to bring her
packets of salts, like I would go to McDonald's and
ask them for packets a salt, Do you have some?
Speaker 7 (11:39):
It was like valued in your family.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
So excuse me. Since ancient Egypt.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
I would like to say book, I would say between
the polo and then this, I feel like we're very I.
Speaker 6 (11:54):
Feel like we're very.
Speaker 4 (11:57):
I feel like we're on like we've wrinted cape. A
private yacht, Missus Marinas chartered it. We're meeting We're meeting
her at it. We're gonna have a grizit with her Guida.
Speaker 7 (12:12):
Before I say this, just remind me.
Speaker 6 (12:15):
So I have a very good friend, and I always
think about this with stealing.
Speaker 7 (12:19):
I won't can't name her.
Speaker 6 (12:21):
When she was in high school, she was at the
mall and the power went out and she said something
went haywire in her head where she was like time
to grab everything. She started grabbing jewelry and like yeah
in Delaware, and then ran out the front of the
(12:42):
mall where as security was and they immediately arrested her.
Speaker 5 (12:46):
And she was like the.
Speaker 4 (12:50):
Panic, it's weird, but the glitch in your brain. Yeah,
So I was side of myself. Here's what I did,
like the side of myself. I was hiking with my
friend Chris, and she's like such a lady, my friend,
and this was We're hiking and like a rattlesnake crossed
our path and like something glitched in my brain.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
Thot belt and I.
Speaker 5 (13:13):
Died it around my waist.
Speaker 4 (13:15):
I took Chris and I shoved her in front of
me to protect.
Speaker 5 (13:19):
Me, but treat me in the stake is.
Speaker 4 (13:21):
He clothed the lights going out. I was like, I
I didn't try to save her. I didn't see belt armor.
I shoved her between half the snake could take me.
Speaker 7 (13:32):
Fucking you just.
Speaker 4 (13:36):
You're grizsiting me.
Speaker 5 (13:37):
We're going for a break.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
And then I just shoved her at the rattlesnake arden.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
I'm thinking, I'm rethinking my entire apocalypse plane at this point. No, don't, don't.
Speaker 9 (13:45):
Don't.
Speaker 5 (13:45):
Don't tell people because they'll all want to come here.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
That's true, that's true.
Speaker 4 (13:48):
We are going to spend it here with men.
Speaker 7 (13:51):
We're here.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Are you still going to come? Because I'll be waiting
for you in the apocalypse.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
I'm gonna come.
Speaker 5 (13:55):
Do you still you? You promise?
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Yes? I will, But just don't shove me in front
of us.
Speaker 4 (14:00):
That sounded half.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
Way will because.
Speaker 4 (14:04):
Honestly, I'll tell you.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
I'm not going to be around as your friend. I'm
not going to be around.
Speaker 6 (14:08):
And she was charged with grand thought, whoa because grande.
Speaker 7 (14:13):
Is anything over one thousand.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Dollars, she gets to keep any of this?
Speaker 6 (14:20):
She was under eighteen, so she didn't have to go
to jail, but she had to do community service and
pulled the bingo balls at the senior so it's fun.
Speaker 5 (14:27):
I would pay to do that.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
Can I ask you a question, because this is this
is the heartbreaking part of this entire thing. Did she
get to keep anything?
Speaker 4 (14:33):
To keep it?
Speaker 7 (14:35):
To follow up?
Speaker 3 (14:36):
As I took your back, I feel like if you
get in trouble for just as I did.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
I we both thought it was like, what do you
get to keep from Claires, you know, a fine hoop
of fun hair, access jewelry, just sort of grabbing jewelry.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
What's your who's your autographs?
Speaker 3 (14:55):
Pleasing?
Speaker 6 (14:55):
Okay, I was saying about this and this is this
is actually a group of people in my highest goal
nice and for lack of better word, they were all nerds,
but like you know, the nerd table is who I'm
going to nominate this because it's like a reverse mean
girls where I there was this girl. Her locker was undermine, quintessential,
(15:16):
like in a screech way, like like made her own clothes, glasses,
had a rolling backpack, like yeah yeah, and she was
so mean to me on a daily basis. Yes, And
my locker was above her. I was older than her,
and she would move it. Stephanie go with her and
(15:40):
she'd roll her back.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
She was ready, she was ready for it.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
Give me the Gray Bob and I'm in the like
I'm in like the Lady and the Short and that
the animated movie, the Incredible Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 6 (15:56):
And then she started doing theater and I did theater
and I was like, okay, I'm gonna be like we're
now in this together. Still has that same energy. I'm
like I would say hi do I would say hey,
how are you hello?
Speaker 4 (16:06):
Yes, Stephanie like me hated.
Speaker 6 (16:11):
I'm like I thinking I'm being nice and yeah, I couldn't.
Speaker 7 (16:16):
I was like I couldn't. It truly was the girls.
I'm like, how am I going to go? Did you lose? No?
Speaker 6 (16:22):
And then we were in the school play together, and god,
it wasn't a real it wasn't like murder mystery high
school thing. And I remember I entered and I did
my line and.
Speaker 7 (16:35):
She goes God, and then she goes timing.
Speaker 6 (16:47):
Stephanie and I was cool in the stereotypical high school world.
Speaker 7 (16:54):
On the bottom, I could not get in there.
Speaker 6 (16:58):
And then I would like I had to like work
with her online tim in time to.
Speaker 5 (17:04):
Like ruin her.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
I hope, so wow.
Speaker 6 (17:06):
And i would sit with her at lunch with her
table and I'm nominating the table because they were all like this,
and I'm like, let's go like running lines for a thing.
Speaker 7 (17:14):
They were so mean to me. They were like, get
the fuck out of here.
Speaker 6 (17:18):
And then I would go sit at my table, which
would be seen like a in the like very stereotypical way.
It's like popular where you think they were mean and
everyone's like, you look so cute, like your shirt and
everyone's so nice. You go over there and they're like
that fucking bitch. And then they would talk about all
my friends like they're so ugly.
Speaker 7 (17:36):
Look at that story.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
I'm like, holy yes, yes these are the bullys.
Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yeah, that is a vibe. Doctor Bannana, if you could
speak right now, what would you say?
Speaker 5 (17:52):
Are you wowed by this?
Speaker 3 (17:53):
I mean I'm shaken to my core. That's terrified.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
Did you have anybody like this in your high school?
Speaker 6 (17:58):
No?
Speaker 3 (17:58):
Everyone was pretty nice.
Speaker 7 (18:00):
What time the bottom?
Speaker 3 (18:02):
You know what that means. I'll tell you what that.
Speaker 4 (18:03):
You're the main girl.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
That's right, always means that means.
Speaker 4 (18:07):
You did you g It's definitely no.
Speaker 3 (18:10):
I was pretty nice too.
Speaker 5 (18:12):
Why did you back her?
Speaker 3 (18:12):
Tize anyone in high school who says high school was
great and there were no bullies, mean it wasn't you.
But no, I I was definitely talked down to by
some people. But I definitely don't think like there was
that energy. I don't know where that energy that was.
Speaker 7 (18:25):
I was like, what the fuck is it? Like reality?
Speaker 4 (18:28):
I'm obsessed with that's a missus marine. Move that to
call me missus marine move because like I snatched the power.
Speaker 5 (18:35):
I hurt you before you hurt me.
Speaker 9 (18:37):
And I respect that.
Speaker 3 (18:38):
You know what I have to say, I actually admire
and I am very proud of the fact that you
didn't win her over, because honestly, what a great lesson
to be, Like, I don't have to please everybody.
Speaker 5 (18:48):
She tried to till she graduated.
Speaker 6 (18:51):
It's like in relationships when you feel you're the higher
status and then they break up.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
With you and you're like, wait, that doesn't go that way.
Speaker 7 (18:58):
You can't break Yeah, you do?
Speaker 5 (19:00):
You have you learn date me question? Do you remember
her first name?
Speaker 7 (19:05):
I do, but I feel weird saying Okay.
Speaker 5 (19:07):
We write it down and we can see it later.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
Does it rhyme with jowlerie?
Speaker 5 (19:12):
Close?
Speaker 7 (19:13):
But with a V E? See, I'm still being nice
to her.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
Do you ever grizz Do you ever? Have you?
Speaker 4 (19:26):
Have you gristed her?
Speaker 3 (19:27):
Well?
Speaker 6 (19:28):
I also think her name really matches her, which is yes, Judy.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
Yeah, I have a cat sur name Judy that I'm
obsessed with.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
Judy Well. Also, I don't know if you did you
know that Judy Garland? It was Judy Garland.
Speaker 5 (19:43):
She's never heard of Judy Garden.
Speaker 3 (19:45):
Well, know Stephanie. I knew very famously back then. This
was when I think Jack was in the White House.
Ye and Stephanie, that's right. I would pick her up
after j Garland show. That's interesting by us, and we
call the president.
Speaker 5 (19:58):
Did you do a little couple of uppers?
Speaker 3 (19:59):
A couple we do, some barbituates, some upper get them
from duty exactly. We rated that medicine cabinet on more
than one A kid.
Speaker 4 (20:06):
If it's in a medicine cabinet's free, it's.
Speaker 5 (20:09):
Up for grabs.
Speaker 4 (20:10):
Here you heard, who would you like to nominate today?
Speaker 3 (20:12):
We nominated my mom. But I got to tell you,
and I don't mean this to sound unfresh, okay, but
I want to nominate hot air balloons and I'll tell
you why.
Speaker 7 (20:21):
Okay, great?
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Did you know and I just learned this. Hot air
balloons have absolutely no control when they stop.
Speaker 4 (20:28):
What do you mean?
Speaker 3 (20:29):
A truck has to follow them because they don't know
where they're going to land, and so they land anywhere.
And I just saw a video of a hot air
balloon landing through a park with people running and usually
and I know people who have done hot air balloons,
one person a diarrhea in it. And this was during
a proposer. Copanola was proposing to his wife, and he
did it as a like as a romantic joke of
(20:49):
like I'm gonna take her in a hot air balloon
and propose. She got very sick up there.
Speaker 4 (20:53):
She had diarrhea.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
But then I know other people who have done it,
who the same thing. They're like, the guy all is
that when you're about to land, it's like, so we're
probably gonna fall out. That usually is what happens. Honey.
They got dragged. They got dragged for zero point one
miles dragged, and then they just whatever property they land on,
the truck has a bottle of whatever champagne to be like,
sorry that we landed here. That's how it goes.
Speaker 5 (21:16):
Every time.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
Every time I.
Speaker 6 (21:18):
Played softball in high school and we were at practice
and a hot air balloom started colming down, it's like.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
Excuse me, wow, I did not know anything.
Speaker 7 (21:31):
I didn't know that.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
Was Oh no, it's typical. It's typical that like literally
they're like you take off and they're like, so we
don't know where we're going or how we're gonna land,
and then we do. Seriously, can you match it? That's
why the truck has to follow them with the champagne bottle.
Speaker 4 (21:43):
Wow?
Speaker 3 (21:44):
Yeah, and you usually fall out.
Speaker 7 (21:47):
On the land.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
What do you mean by that? So the balloon lands,
but it doesn't like down, it.
Speaker 8 (21:54):
Like comes in yere. This was and you get dragged
and it's horrible.
Speaker 5 (21:59):
By a whole, Yes, like by a whore.
Speaker 3 (22:01):
But then someone else told me they didn't get dragged
and it was really nice. But I was like, I've
heard you're the one person out of.
Speaker 4 (22:05):
Everyone remind you they're trying to break your feet.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
I love that. A hot air balloon really couldn't give
a funk. No, and it did mass to be in
that position. No, a balloon doesn't want to.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
Carry you because it knows it's gorgeous. It's like I'm beautiful,
they argue you. I don't need to learn how to land.
You're gonna keep coming at me whether I try or not.
Speaker 5 (22:22):
I'm gorgeous. That's no autographs. Please do me a favor,
do me a favor.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Take take your.
Speaker 5 (22:27):
Wife on the balloon.
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Ride get dragged, Get dragged.
Speaker 3 (22:31):
Well, and everyone's anti dragon. Now I say, you be
pro drag. You know what I mean?
Speaker 4 (22:38):
Who's that your therapist? The Paparazzi. Okay, listen, So we're
about to take a quick break and when we come back,
as any podcast that has a seamless flow from segment
to segment, we then come back and we have a
hotel bill hot bell and if we're Brian and are
going to be going on an improvised first date, and
it has to go well Stephane, Okay, it has to
(23:02):
end well drug stefinitely. So we've had our listeners d
m us on naps pod want our podcast at at
naps but you can email us at napspod the number
one at Gmail. These are real lines of the worst
things that have been said to our listeners on dates
out of context. So if you hear this, that is
a real lifeline that has been said to somebody that
(23:24):
listens to this podcast. Brian and I are going in
a date. Stephanie will be joining in as the rest
of the world. We have first sam sort have been
emailed into us.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
We do I'm going to be Canavan.
Speaker 4 (23:34):
Well now I'm going to be a real life person
named I'm a nut and we will be going on
a date on a I think we need to Brian
on obviously, sure, and we're back. Brian and I are
(23:56):
on a first date that has to end. Well, we're
currently about to board a hot air blow. My name
is I'm a.
Speaker 5 (24:01):
Nut and Brian is canavan.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
I'm a hey caravan, No canavan, canna van go faster
than a car? You know that's yeah, wow, yeah, and
that's a sincere question. I've actually been looking for an answer.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
Well, cannav and go faster than I'm going to say
it probably can't because there's a lot of a weight
to it.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Well, thank you for meeting me. I thought that we
do really something very sort of romantic, okay, and you
look strong, so I thought you might be up for
a little hut air balloon. I'm very rich. Soney means
nothing to me, and I wondered if you won't want
to go with you.
Speaker 4 (24:41):
Well, I have to say I'm a little bit I
see that there's a lot of birds in the sky.
Speaker 5 (24:45):
I get a little bit nervous.
Speaker 4 (24:46):
You might not know that pigeons are just the rats
of the sky.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
You know what. I have thought that before. I'll be
honest with you, I'd.
Speaker 5 (24:55):
Love to join you. This is gadgets. We're in kind
of like an urban setting.
Speaker 4 (24:58):
Do you think it'll be hard for us to fly
this hot air balloon or absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
We're on top of a building, baby, my building. I
own this bilm Oh you are?
Speaker 4 (25:06):
You are wearing a giant medallion out of a dollar sign?
Speaker 3 (25:09):
I ever heard of the bumpet? That was me?
Speaker 5 (25:11):
Oh good, oh.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Oh, oh god, damn.
Speaker 7 (25:14):
It all ready to go up?
Speaker 4 (25:16):
Yeah, yeah, thank you.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
You know. I have to be honest. You're not a
very elegant person. I don't mean that. Don't mean that.
It's an accusation. But we're going on a hot air balloon, right.
Speaker 7 (25:22):
I thought it'd be a little cold. It's just I'm
very elegant.
Speaker 6 (25:26):
Okay, Okay, I'm graceful and elegant. Okay, Bruce h you
always call me mister Thornton.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
Okay, mister.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
I have a few questions before we start. This is
from mister Thornton, because I'm worried about my safety and
also worried about who you might be as a person.
Who's your favorite character in Four Weddings and a Funeral?
Speaker 7 (25:47):
I haven't uh here, grant.
Speaker 3 (25:50):
Okay, that's good, that's good.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
I'm concerned you're not thugged out enough for me, so
I don't know that that's the right answer.
Speaker 7 (25:59):
You look like any tanner.
Speaker 4 (26:05):
I get that a lot.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Did you watch Fuller House?
Speaker 7 (26:12):
Oh I missed it.
Speaker 6 (26:13):
I got Netflix just for that show.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
Mister Thornton. I gotta tell you, I'm feeling very comfortable
with you.
Speaker 4 (26:20):
Let's get it.
Speaker 7 (26:21):
Get up, all right, let's do it.
Speaker 4 (26:23):
I'm going to tell you, Oh god, this is uncomfortable.
Speaker 6 (26:25):
It's a little everyone's got the length of their hips.
By the way, your hips give off a very fertile vibe.
Speaker 5 (26:34):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
Are you ready for you are welcome. It's on the line,
mister Thornton, It's on the mist.
Speaker 4 (26:41):
Thank you. You know what my ex, my ex told
me that I looked like my eggs would be like dust,
like like like sea turtles and dust, and so that
makes me feel better.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
You're not cool enough to make my ex sheellus?
Speaker 4 (26:53):
Excuse me?
Speaker 3 (26:54):
What what was that? I said? You're not cool enough
to make my ex jellous?
Speaker 7 (27:01):
A woman could ever be president? Periods?
Speaker 6 (27:04):
Yo, Let's just remember gender.
Speaker 4 (27:08):
Can we just take off here, police for saying let's
explain how this works?
Speaker 9 (27:12):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (27:13):
So he makes everything rides and we're going to ride.
That wasn't I chose aerospace engineering is my major because
it was.
Speaker 5 (27:21):
The only thing I couldn't learn on YouTube.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
So you're a lot smarter than I thought you'd be.
I thought you were a hairstylist.
Speaker 4 (27:29):
I bought the hairstylist and an aerospace engineer.
Speaker 6 (27:32):
My coworkers have it out for me, and that's why
I was fired three times.
Speaker 7 (27:36):
So let's get oh my god, no more questions.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Were you fired?
Speaker 4 (27:47):
Why were you fired?
Speaker 6 (27:48):
A little bit of a sticky finger? That's why I
came itself up in the air.
Speaker 4 (27:51):
Just one finger. You just sticky finger? Where do you
put that finger? Okay, so listen. I just want to
say before we get going, I washed my sheets just
in case, and I shaved.
Speaker 3 (28:08):
Wow that music to uh oh you like music?
Speaker 4 (28:13):
It's guess what. Later on this week, I'm having some
friends over for a Madman party. We all wear fifties
clothes and watch the show.
Speaker 5 (28:21):
What do you wear?
Speaker 3 (28:22):
Don't talk about mad Man for this city. He doesn't
know what that is.
Speaker 4 (28:25):
House.
Speaker 7 (28:26):
That's right, and you grant my two fates?
Speaker 8 (28:29):
Now, quick update already what's going on?
Speaker 6 (28:34):
This feels like we're just flying to tell you something
before we took off. We don't know how to land
and me but also speaking for all hot air ballots.
Uh huh, so when we run out of uh helium, helium,
heliums right fire to fire, fire and helium. Yeah, we
will see where we're dragged to and where we.
Speaker 4 (28:56):
We're like over like highways right now, because that feels
pretty fun. It's like an a.
Speaker 3 (29:02):
No natural beauty. It's literally only we're just just see
three ways.
Speaker 5 (29:06):
Why did you I didn't know that.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
I thought we were going the other way where the
woods are.
Speaker 6 (29:10):
Well, honestly, you know we could end up in France.
What language do they speak in France?
Speaker 7 (29:16):
You know what?
Speaker 3 (29:16):
Oh? My god, see this is so. I'm so glad
my clients aren't here because this is so because I
do a lot of clients.
Speaker 4 (29:23):
What are you up to?
Speaker 3 (29:25):
Well, I don't bump it, okay, do you know what?
You probably don't? My god, you want like, for instance,
you have a you actually do have a.
Speaker 7 (29:34):
Good mullet's cheery. Never had a cut?
Speaker 4 (29:41):
Oh, oh, I could tell it. It goes very long.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
Yeah, I can see that. So it would be if
you wanted, for instance, your hair at the back to have.
Although I'm worried about the flame, but it would be
if you wanted your hair at the back to have
a little lift. That's not what's important right now. I
have a client meeting later, okay, because I have some
new to announce.
Speaker 4 (30:01):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (30:03):
I plan to be a senator and a soccer dad,
so I'm looking for a respectable Republican woman who can
fit into that. Though I also picture myself as a
single dad, so maybe someone also okay with divorce?
Speaker 4 (30:16):
Wait, you're.
Speaker 7 (30:18):
I have a message for Obambah.
Speaker 4 (30:21):
Fucked you.
Speaker 6 (30:24):
God?
Speaker 7 (30:24):
So I am on boor Wow.
Speaker 4 (30:27):
Mister Thornton, you can't throw yourself in the ring. I'm
on this date now, mister Thorton.
Speaker 5 (30:32):
Noware you mister, mister mister Thorp.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
I gotta tell you, mister Thornton.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
Mister Bruce Thorton, mister Thornton, mister Thornton.
Speaker 3 (30:41):
Do you mind if, mister Thornton, you don't know a
top hot do you like?
Speaker 5 (30:47):
Do you want to get ready for my mad Men party?
Speaker 3 (30:49):
I want to get ready for mad Men party. But
I also thought I could do like a hot air
balloon stop tour. Oh okay, promote my senatorial efforts.
Speaker 4 (30:56):
Oh that would be nice, like the monopoly man. You're
gonna be like the monopoly I actually what I brought
a menu.
Speaker 3 (31:02):
Of sushi, and I brought very liberal.
Speaker 4 (31:05):
Well, look, I want you to compare each of your
friends to the different sushi rolls on the menu.
Speaker 3 (31:12):
Yeah I can, Okay, mister Thornton is for sure one
of the fried vegetables at a Mommy, No, you know
they like Panco fried. He doesn't know.
Speaker 7 (31:22):
Do you like Tura? Have traveled too many areas?
Speaker 5 (31:29):
Not France.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
You went from Santa Fe to Japan to France. Wow?
Oh to close the loop? But they speak in France?
Is should I give you it?
Speaker 7 (31:43):
Please?
Speaker 4 (31:43):
Let's hear it.
Speaker 3 (31:44):
You'll like this. You're gonna have some moorgasm sounds.
Speaker 9 (31:50):
She did, being too coward.
Speaker 7 (32:10):
I want to look your eyeballs.
Speaker 5 (32:13):
You know what, mister Thornton, I have to tell you.
Speaker 3 (32:16):
Wait, whose eyeballs for mine?
Speaker 4 (32:19):
All four?
Speaker 1 (32:20):
Whoa?
Speaker 4 (32:21):
I gotta say, I mean, we're they're so dried out
for being up in the atmosphere that I could use
a little moisture.
Speaker 8 (32:27):
Actually, I'm with you, give them give give.
Speaker 7 (32:36):
Oh, wow, you need a little serum.
Speaker 4 (32:41):
On my eyeballs?
Speaker 7 (32:42):
Are my face?
Speaker 3 (32:43):
I gotta say? I can I double down on that? Actually,
I do have to say, like I understand on an
airplane's altitude drying out your skin. Your skin is very dry,
and your eyes look like did you see dune? No,
they look like that entire movie like.
Speaker 4 (33:01):
It this a sand dune, like it's just like a
stand like the Sahara desert. Yeah, listen, you're eating so
much sushi. Can I just say, you know, if you
don't eat as much, your stomach will start shrinking and
you train your body to lose that extra weight.
Speaker 3 (33:16):
Okay, listen, fertile hips.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
Okay, sand dune face.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Listen, sand dune face needing serum, fertile hips. I take
that as a compliment.
Speaker 4 (33:27):
Okay, Okay, you need to compare it. I need to
hear another one of your friends on sushi. Let's hear
another role. I need one more friend of yours.
Speaker 5 (33:34):
To compare it to the many.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
I have a friend named Carrie under Bake. She ran
for governor and herself.
Speaker 5 (33:43):
Oh, you hang out with other other politicians.
Speaker 3 (33:47):
Other politicians. I only hang out with newscasters who become politicians.
They already know how to do their makeup.
Speaker 5 (33:52):
Sure, okay, okay, So.
Speaker 3 (33:54):
Carrie Lake to me would be at a sushi restaurant.
Uh huh, she would be chicken karaokey. Why because she's
not sushi ham me. You know what I mean. She's
the real America. She's the real America. She's better than
she's the real America.
Speaker 4 (34:12):
You said that I was surprised you were going to
wear your Make America a great hat on the balloon,
and that you were going to remove it for a
top hat.
Speaker 5 (34:18):
But it looks great.
Speaker 3 (34:19):
I left a mental institution last week, and I only
came with the clothes in.
Speaker 5 (34:23):
My back, okay, from the institution or to the I
wore that.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
All the clothes they had were from the institution.
Speaker 4 (34:30):
Okay, So did you get back the ones that you
went in with her?
Speaker 5 (34:32):
Did they just give you any old closes?
Speaker 3 (34:33):
Going really fast? I gotta tell you, I don't like
the speed and the wind chill, and I didn't bring
any mold on.
Speaker 7 (34:39):
Let me because I have a confession to make.
Speaker 3 (34:42):
He's just making money.
Speaker 7 (34:45):
No, that wasn't me. Helium.
Speaker 3 (34:48):
Okay, are we sure it's helium?
Speaker 6 (34:53):
I want to I think it's okay, Okay, balloons.
Speaker 4 (34:56):
I chose aerospace engineering as my major because it was
the only thing I couldn't learn on YouTube.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Well, my ex of three years and I broke up
two weeks ago because she got in a fight with
my mom. Would you'd never do something like that?
Speaker 6 (35:10):
Right?
Speaker 5 (35:10):
I haven't met your mom?
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Is your mom?
Speaker 3 (35:12):
She's great? Actually? Actually? Can we make a quick pip
stop to my pip stop?
Speaker 5 (35:18):
Can we have to make a gris Can we make
a gri.
Speaker 7 (35:21):
That week? Definitely make quick grizzd Let's go make a.
Speaker 4 (35:23):
Grizzit and drag across his mom's and I want to
meet his mom. Okay, all right, let's go crashing your
mom's love for a grizzit.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
Got to my mom's house. Are those orgasms sounds?
Speaker 4 (35:43):
I was landing?
Speaker 3 (35:43):
I know. I know me too, So that's how you land.
Before I knock the door, I passed out halfway through
before okay, before I knock on the door, I want
to tell you something.
Speaker 5 (35:52):
I want to tell you something to.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
First of all, I love that you're so comfortable being
yourself and you're not ashamed of all bast I am
I on meth right now.
Speaker 7 (36:03):
Oops, we're all a little weird. I eat my toenails.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
Okay, mister Thornton, nobody asked you.
Speaker 7 (36:10):
I'm just.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
That is actually feeling that is.
Speaker 7 (36:15):
Come on, we're all sharing.
Speaker 5 (36:16):
I didn't say anything like that. I I look, I
lied though.
Speaker 4 (36:20):
I'm not really a haird stylist or an aerospace engineer.
I'm a line cook at a restaurant, but I'm really
a music producer.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
Okay, all right, Look, my ex of three years and
I broke up two weeks ago because I got my mom.
You right, do not I'm borning you. When I knock
on the story answers, do not do not fight with them?
Speaker 4 (36:42):
Okay, everything, I'm gonna do that.
Speaker 3 (36:44):
Okay, let me do my signature.
Speaker 4 (36:45):
Not are you kidding me? Is it really.
Speaker 3 (36:59):
Look beautiful?
Speaker 5 (37:02):
Did you guys just kiss on the mouth?
Speaker 4 (37:04):
So why did you kiss your son.
Speaker 3 (37:06):
On the mouth? Gross? Yeah, we're very intimately connected and
it's not like that. Okay, And I'm not gonna I'm
not gonna say your.
Speaker 4 (37:14):
Mom's robe is open, so what she's not? She came
out with an open.
Speaker 7 (37:20):
Robe and show you?
Speaker 3 (37:24):
Why did you tell her what you wanted to show?
Speaker 9 (37:26):
Well?
Speaker 7 (37:26):
I look how amazing my body is.
Speaker 3 (37:28):
It looks great. Okay, listen to my mother.
Speaker 4 (37:31):
I'm sorry I would.
Speaker 3 (37:33):
I don't bring it up because she'll hate you.
Speaker 6 (37:35):
Is this?
Speaker 5 (37:36):
Oh Hi, I'm not I am.
Speaker 4 (37:42):
I am a line and cook at a restaurant, but
I'm really a music producer. And listen, I have to say,
your son has been so rude. Your son has been
so rude on this day. He told me that my
skin needed seerum that my face look at this?
Speaker 7 (38:01):
How did you raise?
Speaker 3 (38:02):
Can you speak up here? Tell them that you're the
one who said to think about the seering.
Speaker 6 (38:06):
My stepmom was a bitch, So I am staying out
of this one. I have no reference point for family.
I just stay up in the air and I stay
out of it.
Speaker 3 (38:18):
So, mister Thornton, honestly, we have to be a little
more sensitive. Mister Thornton's stepmom was a bitch. Whenever he
sees a panics.
Speaker 5 (38:24):
But maybe there's sparks there.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
Maybe there's gonna be chemistry between mister Thornton and your mister.
Are you single, mister.
Speaker 7 (38:31):
Thornton, I am single by choice, but I am happy
to okay.
Speaker 4 (38:38):
You want to mean waahoo, he's horning.
Speaker 3 (38:44):
He's mom. Say hi to mister Thornton.
Speaker 4 (38:47):
Hello, he just kissed her on the mouth. Mister Thornton,
You've got to ask you cannot just go in.
Speaker 7 (38:52):
But she has all of her everything out. She's an
open person. God, well, why don't you come on in?
Let me explain to you how I make espresso. We
little coffee. Excuse us.
Speaker 3 (39:16):
You to be mom before you get mom, before you go,
before you go, because this is this is I want
to know. First of all? Will you explain to us
how to make espress?
Speaker 8 (39:28):
Ye?
Speaker 6 (39:29):
Please explain it all right, come on over here, okay, okay,
close the door or the robe.
Speaker 3 (39:36):
Yeah you know what we will private okay, okay, okay,
she want us to You and.
Speaker 6 (39:44):
Mister Thornton need if you two want to go back
up in the balloon without me, feel free?
Speaker 4 (39:51):
Fine?
Speaker 3 (39:52):
Okay, by mister Thornton's really something to me.
Speaker 4 (39:55):
Yes, bye, mister Thornton. I'll never forget you, mister Thornton.
Speaker 3 (39:59):
Mom, before before you go, can you sing us a duet? Yeah?
Speaker 5 (40:04):
Well you sing us a duet of what was.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
The song you were up with? Bad Romance?
Speaker 4 (40:09):
Bad Romance?
Speaker 3 (40:10):
Okay?
Speaker 8 (40:11):
Will you sing jingle bells a duet? I know it's
the data summer, do it harmonized?
Speaker 7 (40:19):
I listened to jingle bells.
Speaker 5 (40:20):
I love jingle much blotting common.
Speaker 7 (40:24):
Jingle jingle, bells, bells, bells, bells jingle the.
Speaker 3 (40:33):
Wow all right YouTube love birds. Okay, let's go back
into the hot air balloon.
Speaker 4 (40:40):
I saw this on YouTube. I actually didn't get my
engineering degree. I saw I watched how to Operate a
Hot air Balloon on YouTube?
Speaker 3 (40:47):
Oh you did? So can you take me to.
Speaker 5 (40:52):
I want to say, you know, I washed my sheets
just in case, and I shaved.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
What are you wearing under your dress?
Speaker 4 (41:00):
Spanks?
Speaker 3 (41:01):
Someone said that on the date.
Speaker 4 (41:04):
I forgot.
Speaker 7 (41:05):
I can't stay. I have to get my dog's anal
glands expressed. Do you know what that means?
Speaker 4 (41:11):
It's like fun fact my mother the first and only
time she got high in her sixties, She's like, we
smoked pot and then we drained my dog's anal glands.
Speaker 3 (41:22):
That's I gotta say. That is the most turned on
I've been all day. Mister Thornton. Take us back to
my place. You know the zip code.
Speaker 4 (41:29):
I can't wait to be I can't wait to be
divorced from a senator.
Speaker 3 (41:33):
You're gonna love it. You're gonna wait.
Speaker 7 (41:37):
Quick question. Who is that Morris's missed that one?
Speaker 4 (41:47):
Sure we go, We're back. Okay, Stephanie. Yes, Brian and
I are trying to become lifestyle influencers. Brian is our care,
(42:07):
we're bakers. Brian's gonna make you a pybe fit. They're
not our sponsor, and they, I think, will not sponsor us.
Speaker 5 (42:14):
But we're trying.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
We're still trying.
Speaker 5 (42:15):
I know you're vegan. Did you bring what did you
bring from your kitchen?
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Okay?
Speaker 7 (42:19):
I brought some cinnamon.
Speaker 3 (42:20):
Have you ever seen this?
Speaker 7 (42:21):
Never?
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Okay? All it is is dehydrated peanuts. Are you allergic
to peanuts?
Speaker 6 (42:25):
No?
Speaker 3 (42:25):
Okay, too bad?
Speaker 7 (42:28):
Too bad, I'm not allergic.
Speaker 3 (42:31):
When I say this every week and I preach this
to my clients, Yes week, we make a peanut butter cake.
Now this is really if you mixed it with water,
it would just be peanut butter. Sure, except it has
Instead of having one hundred and ninety calories were serving,
it has sixty. Okay, instead of having seven grands approacheines eight.
And instead of having sixteen sixteen grams of that, it
(42:52):
has two. Get a load of them.
Speaker 6 (42:53):
About the carbohydrates, who carbohydrates has that's the main one.
Speaker 4 (42:57):
It does have six carbohydrates, Okay, six cabohydrates, So all.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
I'm gonna do simple, So today we're doing.
Speaker 4 (43:04):
I'm gonna you're the cook today because you yelled at
me last time when I.
Speaker 3 (43:07):
Touched it, you coked both. Last time you did a
fantastic Yeah you really did. So all I'm doing to this,
as everyone can see, there's nothing in my hands except
this new model of.
Speaker 4 (43:17):
Water, so I'm also practicing magic.
Speaker 3 (43:20):
I am. So I'm putting this here, okay, and then
I'm just mixed, mixed mix, you know what I mean,
Like you could do this.
Speaker 4 (43:26):
For you know, Grid Junkle or you know, if you're
grizziting your gritch, uncle.
Speaker 3 (43:30):
You're grizziting your grit. Okay, easy enough, right.
Speaker 4 (43:33):
Nope, nothing in my hand.
Speaker 5 (43:36):
No, Stephanie, how did you think that date went?
Speaker 3 (43:39):
Now?
Speaker 7 (43:39):
I thought that was pretty good?
Speaker 5 (43:41):
Good?
Speaker 4 (43:42):
Good?
Speaker 3 (43:42):
Is that?
Speaker 5 (43:43):
How how you and your bride was that? Your first date?
Was it an exact replica.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
You to me?
Speaker 7 (43:48):
Can you say, yeah, we met on it? Well, we
met on a movie.
Speaker 6 (43:52):
Of course.
Speaker 3 (43:54):
It was like, yes, fantastic, We're sparks flying pretty quickly.
Speaker 6 (43:59):
No, I mean we really got along and we laugh
like laughed a lot, but definitely.
Speaker 7 (44:04):
Uh. I thought I was straight and she had a
girlfriend and so right to take a second.
Speaker 3 (44:10):
Do you all still make each other laugh? No?
Speaker 7 (44:15):
No, nothing?
Speaker 4 (44:16):
She could possibly say nothing, hears.
Speaker 7 (44:21):
I've loved air for years.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
What was the line that made you most shocked that
you heard from the listener's emailing it?
Speaker 7 (44:31):
Well, I will say I.
Speaker 6 (44:32):
Think my favorite is well, actually have two looking at this,
I like your hips have fertile vibes.
Speaker 5 (44:39):
That's amazing. That is so wild, that is so wide.
Speaker 3 (44:43):
You get to pick this is another thing that's very
fun for the guests. You get to pick pure vanilla
extract or pure vanilla, Mexican vanilla extract, Madagascar Bourbon villa
extract or tahitia. None of it has alcohol.
Speaker 7 (44:56):
I'll go with Madagascar bourbon though.
Speaker 4 (44:59):
So did you have any bad things said to you
on dates? And did you have like good self care
on dates? What do you mean like did you like
yourself when you were dating enough? Because we also in
this segment as lifestyle influence ors, we talk about self
care this did.
Speaker 3 (45:14):
You ask the question which someone else pointed out there?
Speaker 5 (45:17):
But do do I like them? Rather than do they
like me?
Speaker 3 (45:19):
I hope they? Did you say I hope they like me?
Or did you say I hope I like them.
Speaker 6 (45:23):
I this is a no autographs moment for myself because
I think, not knowing I was gay, I was only
dating men. Yeah, and uh, I had a lot of
confidence because I was like, I don't give a shit.
Speaker 7 (45:37):
Yeah, I say I didn't. I was like, how do
I figure this out?
Speaker 6 (45:44):
And I think it made me very desirable to men,
which was odd in return, cause she doesn't give a shit.
Speaker 5 (45:51):
She didn't care that.
Speaker 4 (45:52):
Yeah. I feel like that we should all take some
of that energy and be like she doesn't care, you know,
like that's kind of hot.
Speaker 6 (46:00):
And I really thought that was part of my personality,
whereas now I'm like, oh, if I was dating women,
I would have been a psychopath.
Speaker 3 (46:06):
Of course, she would have been nervous about everybody. I
get it. I've never dated a woman as an adult.
Speaker 5 (46:13):
I thought we dated for two years.
Speaker 3 (46:14):
For two years, and then I lobbed that on you.
It's like with everything I think, like, you're a comedian
and also an actress and also a producer and also
a director, and all of you aren't you. Yes. I
sometimes think when you do more things, not one of
them is so precious you're scared of it anymore, Like well,
if that doesn't pan out, it sucks. But it's also okay,
yeah you know what I mean. Yeah, you're not going
(46:34):
into rooms freaking out.
Speaker 7 (46:36):
Yes, But I think it's interesting in life.
Speaker 6 (46:39):
And I think this with friends or any relationships where
it's like weird when you really like someone, Yeah, what
is that?
Speaker 7 (46:46):
It's like all of a sudden, you're like, wait, what
am I supposed.
Speaker 6 (46:48):
To do with this?
Speaker 4 (46:50):
It's vulnerable.
Speaker 6 (46:51):
Yeah, But then I look at my kids who are
six and a half, and like they when they have
a new friend, You're my friend.
Speaker 7 (46:59):
I like you so much. They run toward each other
and they're like, I love you. They hug each other.
It's so joyful, like, and I go, I think I
feel that way about people, like but I can't do that.
Speaker 6 (47:11):
I know.
Speaker 4 (47:12):
I have no game.
Speaker 5 (47:13):
I mean I have I have no poker face. So
if I like you, I'm like, I like you.
Speaker 7 (47:19):
I like I think it's nice.
Speaker 4 (47:21):
But then sometimes so I was married for a long
time and then I went on a bunch of dates
and I didn't really like getny of the people that much.
And then now I'm in my first relationship, so it's
been ten months, and then sometimes I'm watching I'm like,
I'm like, oh I get my garden shut.
Speaker 5 (47:37):
The fuck, like, just zip it.
Speaker 3 (47:40):
I do have to say, it's a huge mistake. You
didn't meet anyone at like UCP or one of the
comedy theaters and get very serious with them, you know,
because they're so nice.
Speaker 4 (47:49):
Because it all really okaya, I don't I want to
see if it's I feel like.
Speaker 5 (47:53):
It's little we got.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
I think this is good.
Speaker 4 (47:55):
Okay, it's like it's a pudding.
Speaker 6 (47:57):
List, but that kind of vender juice, the jew the
energy of like I hate myself so therefore I hate
you more.
Speaker 4 (48:03):
Yes, all gonna eat it?
Speaker 5 (48:05):
Okay, Okay, now you go first.
Speaker 7 (48:08):
This is actually pretty good.
Speaker 3 (48:12):
You don't even know, I will say, And I always
like it, yeah, we always, but sometimes people don't.
Speaker 7 (48:18):
This is your powder, vanilla and cinnamon and water.
Speaker 3 (48:21):
And a little bit of cocoa powder, just a little bit.
Oh I like that. Yeah, it's not it shouldn't be gross.
I hope like you could be a lot.
Speaker 5 (48:30):
Stephanie Mike Castle gave it a ten.
Speaker 3 (48:32):
Lauren Laptus gave it.
Speaker 4 (48:33):
A Two's very is that possible?
Speaker 3 (48:36):
She gave it a two? But we made a different
kind for her. We put an egg white and then
we put pumpkin.
Speaker 5 (48:42):
But I did well last week with the egg.
Speaker 3 (48:45):
We have a we have a long standing feud about
the egg white.
Speaker 4 (48:48):
I got two tens last week.
Speaker 7 (48:52):
Okay, I'm not a huge chocolate person. I should give
it a nine.
Speaker 4 (49:03):
At fifteen because she didn't even like chocolate.
Speaker 3 (49:06):
Children have because you know them? Do you think they
have the palate for something like that? Would you serve
this to children? En Mass?
Speaker 5 (49:14):
And we serve this to children?
Speaker 4 (49:16):
Can we serve I guess my guests, we don't know
any children we need that?
Speaker 3 (49:21):
Dony child improvisers?
Speaker 1 (49:24):
Are you?
Speaker 9 (49:25):
You're not?
Speaker 4 (49:25):
And I like you so much?
Speaker 5 (49:26):
Kind of a person you're not? And I like you
so much?
Speaker 3 (49:29):
You mean a relationships of them? I gotta say, but
I think something missing with me? Were like I always
date perfectly wonderful people that I cannot cross over with.
Speaker 6 (49:37):
No.
Speaker 7 (49:38):
Do do you look at people and go like from afar, like,
do you think you have it in you?
Speaker 6 (49:43):
No?
Speaker 5 (49:43):
He doesn't.
Speaker 3 (49:44):
I hope I have. I hope I have it in me.
But I've never had a crush. It's very odd.
Speaker 4 (49:49):
I've told you that. That's okay, we've discussed this I
remember you've been hard on yourself about that.
Speaker 3 (49:54):
But I've been in therapy forever.
Speaker 4 (49:55):
But you've had a.
Speaker 5 (49:56):
Strong feelings for people.
Speaker 3 (49:58):
Yeah, no, I have.
Speaker 4 (49:59):
I have because because I know because you've been hurt,
so you you if you were, you might have a
different word for it.
Speaker 5 (50:06):
And maybe it's self protection.
Speaker 4 (50:08):
Like I'm sure you probably had to be in the
closet growing off like all that, Like just knowing your background,
I'm sure it wasn't safe to be like I have
a crush on so and so I haven't Like I'm
sure that felt maybe not safe in Texas growing up
at that time. So perhaps now, look, we are wiring,
is what it is. But like I know that people
have certainly hurt your feelings, that's true.
Speaker 7 (50:29):
So introverted, like do you like being alone more?
Speaker 6 (50:32):
I think that's hard because then the relationship you're kind
of like, wait, you're intruding on my favorite thing.
Speaker 2 (50:41):
You know.
Speaker 5 (50:44):
I do like to be alone.
Speaker 3 (50:44):
I do love it.
Speaker 5 (50:45):
I like to be alone.
Speaker 7 (50:46):
So I feel like you need someone that doesn't.
Speaker 3 (50:48):
I don't know your wife really and all except from
her work and I've met her a couple of times,
but I get the sense that she could be the
same way.
Speaker 6 (50:54):
So maybe that's yeah, like we were alone together and
it still feels good.
Speaker 7 (50:58):
That's not I feel like, oh god, I'm like ignoring
this person.
Speaker 5 (51:02):
No, no, no, no, you need you need somebody that
can be I need a few hours a day alone.
Speaker 3 (51:06):
Yeah, oh yeah, I have to.
Speaker 4 (51:08):
When we travel together, we separate and then we come
back together and watch Judge, Judy and Jeopardy.
Speaker 3 (51:14):
You gotta hang out with us. We're so fun? Are fun? Fish?
From five pm to nine pm? Then ardens up til four, eight.
Speaker 4 (51:20):
Four, and then you're up at five am and he
goes on his long walk.
Speaker 7 (51:23):
Do we want till four?
Speaker 4 (51:24):
I'm at night owl, living my life on it, trying
on everything. I oh, googling people. I hate buying things
on Amazon. Uh, you know, watching trash TV.
Speaker 7 (51:35):
And no, I don't get up.
Speaker 5 (51:37):
I get up at like eight or nine.
Speaker 4 (51:38):
I'm tired, but then I can take a disco nap.
Speaker 3 (51:42):
Yeah, yeah, thank you for being here.
Speaker 7 (51:47):
Where can people find you?
Speaker 3 (51:50):
Nowhere only and everything? But where do you want people
throw you? On Instagramer?
Speaker 6 (51:54):
You don't Stephanie Allen and your last name is spelled
with a y, yeah in a double N and a
double L.
Speaker 3 (52:02):
Pronounced Alan double l.
Speaker 7 (52:05):
Why double n my middle name, so my parents made
it up so weird.
Speaker 6 (52:11):
I like that.
Speaker 4 (52:12):
You'll be getting a grizzit from me on Instagram.
Speaker 3 (52:15):
Jeffany, thank you so much.
Speaker 9 (52:18):
Guys.
Speaker 4 (52:22):
Hey, you guys, don't forget you can like, listen, review
and subscribe to us.
Speaker 5 (52:27):
And it really helps, doesn't it, Brian?
Speaker 3 (52:29):
It absolutely does. It gets the attention of the people
at Apple, and they'll say, why don't we feature this.
Speaker 5 (52:34):
These these why don't I feature these these cakes? Guess what,
We're over three hundred stars already, we are.
Speaker 4 (52:40):
Really here's one that's five stats BlackBerry Mirror. I follow
Brian that's you over from Attitudes and ask Ronner with
Rona and Bryan because I cannot get enough of his
unhinged energy. Aden is an effervescent and a comedic treasure.
I have to listen at home or in the cat
because I frequently cackle while listening.
Speaker 3 (53:03):
Daisy O Day says, I came for the stars, but
stay for the peanut butter pumpkin cake that Arden and
Brian truly believe tastes good.
Speaker 4 (53:09):
Best theme song, five Stars Jerry Shank I can't get
it out of my head.
Speaker 5 (53:14):
I love it.
Speaker 4 (53:15):
There's two music signs. I love the hectic energy served here,
keep it coming, naps energy, Baby.
Speaker 3 (53:21):
We love you, and also Daisy O Days says their
earnest approach to each by to the disgusted sounding guests
makes me cry laughing. I hope they never dropped the
recipe part because it's my favorite part. We never will.
We literally just to believe that even if an army
told us to stop, we wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (53:36):
Literally. This sad thing is people who have traveled with
us doctor Bananas. One of them are for Jessicer stef
Stphanie Stphanie, all of them, we're like, the first thing,
we're like, oh my, it was like two children running
at them covered peanut butter powder, going no, no, no,
We're gonna cook for you.
Speaker 5 (53:54):
We're to cook for you.
Speaker 4 (53:55):
And all of them are like, what the fuck is this?
Speaker 7 (53:57):
You like this?
Speaker 5 (53:59):
But some of the people have liked it.
Speaker 4 (54:00):
Myke Castle liked it, and so did Stephanie Allen.
Speaker 3 (54:04):
Stephanie Allen liked it.
Speaker 5 (54:05):
They all have to break up with Laura Lopkez.
Speaker 3 (54:08):
She's the root of people's out.
Speaker 4 (54:11):
She's jealous, jealous they were great bacons.
Speaker 3 (54:14):
Jealous. She's jealous.
Speaker 4 (54:15):
She's jealous about great Silver, like, gosh, it our great
Los Angeles, a great Hollywood bakeoff.
Speaker 3 (54:23):
You tell him, baby.
Speaker 4 (54:24):
By the way, we are overwhelmed, like it's so fun
now that the podcast is going and we're getting real
lines from our listeners. Okay, so I had a bunch
of lines from I'm gonna probably say this wrong. Guerist
Megan Delaney, Gabby Rooram Bayrend, Betsy Lee, Anna French, Adrian Ashby,
Shelle Shelby Heart and Alison T.
Speaker 3 (54:47):
Wilmington Drive, Irene Binder, Mishmed sl Mary Bennett a Brian Reaper,
Shelley Puri too, Charles Rogers, who's the future guest on
the show? Amy two twenty four hundred and impressed much?
Kaylen mclock Lynn, Jack Attack Picks and Stephanie said some
from Instagram Francisco, Alex Clink Thinks, Becca Gasolia, Uncle, Jenny
(55:10):
zach Lemmy, Alison Launch, d Mer Steele, John are you okay?
Shady Rose Diplo Human, Lily Glickstein, Kevin Walldrop, what did
Charles crispy?
Speaker 5 (55:24):
What was Charles's Jennifer.
Speaker 3 (55:26):
Lynn Armstrong, Oh my god, you have a lot well
these are Stephanie's what will I see?
Speaker 6 (55:30):
What was it?
Speaker 5 (55:30):
What was Charles's line?
Speaker 3 (55:32):
I left a mental institution last week?
Speaker 9 (55:34):
Wow?
Speaker 5 (55:34):
We need to ask him about that. That's so fun.
Speaker 3 (55:37):
And of course, of course, of course you know who
you are. Okay, great, all right, we'll see you next week.
Speaker 4 (55:45):
Yeah, And if you want to simmon lines to forget,
follow us on Instagram, naps pod, or email us napspod
the number one at gmail dot com.
Speaker 3 (55:52):
Anna. Thank you to Katie, Thank you to Sergio Lopus
for our socials, and thank you to the fabulous who
wrote our themes.
Speaker 4 (55:57):
Mark Rivers, we love you.
Speaker 3 (55:58):
No please? Who are you wearing?
Speaker 1 (56:03):
Will there be pressed to Alex Fabia, Yeah, Gotchagin and Brian,
I hear it. Last there'd be a mess.
Speaker 2 (56:14):
And they've got lots of podcast but honey, no, no, no, no,
Hono grass piece. We live in in the camel lifel
like celebrities and sharing other favorite FEMI recipes.
Speaker 3 (56:28):
But honey, no, no, no, no autographs. I got a
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