"If You Don't Look Your Worst, How will You Look Your Best?" w/ Charles Rogers

Hi dearest hearts! This week, Arden and Bryan are joined by the cool-hot-hip-fun-funny Charles Rogers (co-creator of "Search Party.") We talk community theatre and its highs and lows (which are also highs), then we go on a date to Chili's (finally!); and, naturally peanut butter cake! What will Charles give it? Search THIS party to find out! 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
No, who are you wearing?

Speaker 2 (00:05):
Will there be pressed to Alan baby and she honey, yeah.

Speaker 1 (00:10):
Gotcha didn't and Brye, I hear it. Last there'd be.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
And they've got lots of podcast but honey, no, no, no, no,
honna grass peace. We live in the camel life like
celebrities and share it up the favorite baby fit recipes. Well, honey, no, no, no,
no autographs, no.

Speaker 3 (00:41):
Autograph, no autop Okay, oh my god, this is so exciting. Hello,
welcome to another episode of no autographs. Please, my name
is a marine. Who are my baby be?

Speaker 1 (00:50):
Brian's beautiful beautifuls me your beautiful baby boy.

Speaker 3 (00:53):
He's my beautiful baby boy. Show me a hat I
do I carry him around? The baby be rd Brian.
First of all, it's so nice.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
How are your children? You know what?

Speaker 3 (01:00):
You know what? Kitty is great, she's off at uh
she's a Georgetown.

Speaker 4 (01:05):
Oh you're kidding.

Speaker 3 (01:06):
I just got I just got a little baby. Keith
is going to that nurses school.

Speaker 4 (01:11):
That's oh your cat. I gotta say, real age spread
between those two, you know what?

Speaker 1 (01:16):
Twenty years right, just about fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, twenty eight.

Speaker 4 (01:21):
Those are my lotto numbers.

Speaker 3 (01:22):
Yes by the way.

Speaker 1 (01:24):
Thank you you.

Speaker 4 (01:26):
I did just see you. I did just catch you.
Look at me up and down.

Speaker 1 (01:28):
I am bring my panty shorts. I wants to know
where Charles Rogers is here, and he's looking at the
time trying to look at him.

Speaker 4 (01:34):
You and Lacey Mosley.

Speaker 3 (01:36):
Both How do our listeners know Charles Rogers?

Speaker 1 (01:38):
How do they know me? He's so they don't know me.

Speaker 4 (01:40):
If they think they know, they don't know. You don't
really you know, I don't know what this is.

Speaker 3 (01:45):
Somebody knows this.

Speaker 4 (01:46):
Man came in this man.

Speaker 1 (01:49):
First of all, thank you for calling me a man
looking looking hot, gorgeous. You really do, Charles, You look fantastic.

Speaker 3 (01:56):
But more very alpha.

Speaker 1 (01:58):
Yeah, very man. I'm ready to kill kill I'm dumb
saying yes please, thank you so much to the waiter.

Speaker 3 (02:04):
Yes, you are ready to.

Speaker 4 (02:06):
Be with it.

Speaker 3 (02:07):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
I got to say this about Charles, and I think,
if not everyone here knows Charles is the co creative
search party.

Speaker 3 (02:13):
Excuse me, god, everything, It's only the most.

Speaker 4 (02:16):
Brilliant showing that happened in the last twenty That's right.

Speaker 3 (02:19):
Was introduced on screen to John Early. I was like,
who won't where I worked years ago? With Meredith loved her.

Speaker 1 (02:25):
Yeah, I remember right, Yeah, that makes sense. You guys
are kindred spirits. I see it.

Speaker 3 (02:30):
I mean I wish, I wish Goldiehn had another son
for me.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
To me to just get out somewhere. Also, I do
have to say your Instagram is nothing short of delightful, hilarious, shocking,
thank you's. And also I want to know if your
gal is running again in twenty twenty four. Is it
too early to tell you? I thought it turned me
onto a candidate. Yes, that for what was her name again?

(02:53):
Anne Ranch? And Ranch? I gotta tell you. I got
to tell you she had the stuff. I bought the
T shirt stuff.

Speaker 4 (03:00):
I was ready for her to go all the way.

Speaker 1 (03:02):
There are still people out there like wearing Ann Ranch
murder random he made up a Canada who knows, you
don't know what say it is us senator. She ran
for president. She won on election day. I need to
keep up with the news as not a president. Yeah,
there's some tea public And also there were like knockoffs.

(03:22):
There were like these random spam ones. But they would
like there would be like an Ranch for president and
then it would just be like a random like tattoo
rose like just like they were like the spam ones
were just making up like Lula Rowe. Did you see
that documentary about the leggings? He doesn't like reading it.
Doesn't like documentaries in fiction. I heard, don't lie. I'm

(03:46):
trying to think that this is true.

Speaker 4 (03:49):
What I'm telling you is what I look at.

Speaker 3 (03:51):
His eyes are closed. What did your client tell you?

Speaker 1 (03:54):
I tell all my clients something that I heard recently. Great. No,
Here's I'm trying to say. When someone asks you, I'm
sure this has happened to all of us at one
point in our sexy careers and by our careers of sex.
Is what I mean? How when someone has someone ever
asked you to choke them? It's happened to me that
someone asked me to check them during sex? Yes, how

(04:15):
far do you know how to go? That is a
good question, It's not I feel is it like a
stage thing where they actually are controlling it by putting
your handle? Well, I think it depends on the person,
because I think some people really want you to take
it there, and then I think other people are like
I think the people that are asking for it really
want you to take it there and then otherwise it's
about you doing it and then it kind of being
something you move through. But it's not really like a

(04:37):
you're not really you're.

Speaker 3 (04:38):
Like we're like ringing the bells of like I'm choking
the neck.

Speaker 1 (04:41):
Yeah, you're doing all the tricks. It's like a part
of it you ever tried, because I actually want to
nobody feels like I don't want anyone to choke me.
Would it be crazy if I and I'll send you guys.

Speaker 4 (04:50):
You want me to choke youright now, don't you? I
want to know?

Speaker 1 (04:54):
And I'll send you guys a video later when I
do it, right before I'm about to climax.

Speaker 4 (04:58):
Okay, I'll send you guys the video.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
Bye, thank you? Is it okay? If I choked myself
to see what it feels like, do you think it's
not the same effect?

Speaker 3 (05:04):
But that's how that's people like that. But that's how
people that be.

Speaker 1 (05:07):
Careful charity, Yes, excess, that's it. Okay, Well, I think
we've thought of some very clever ways to die.

Speaker 3 (05:15):
Do you want me to choke you?

Speaker 1 (05:16):
No? I I already told you guys, I don't want
who's going to choke you? You're going to choke choke me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, okay,
I'm gonna send you guys the video. Okay, great, yeah, okay, okay. Now,
and I do want I do want critique, critique, critic Okay,
I need notes.

Speaker 3 (05:31):
First of all, your hand's not manicured.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
That's a prosthetic dick.

Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:38):
First all, that's your hand, that's a banana. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (05:42):
Now, Brian, would you like to start this week with
the no autogrash please?

Speaker 5 (05:46):
Energy.

Speaker 1 (05:46):
I want Charles to start because I have to be
honest with you, Charles, apparently I have too many. It's
assignment you start.

Speaker 3 (05:55):
Do you want to start with a personal one? You
want to start with the public one? What do you
want to start with?

Speaker 1 (05:58):
I'll start with one that happened to my mom. I
like this. It feels very brillant. So okay. So my
mom is a flight attendant for American Airlines nineteen sixty
eight sex and she's still flying. She's the twenty fifth
oldest flight attendant at American Airlines. She must have such
status there, I mean, she's top of it. Does but
airlines are terrible companies, so it's not like that. At

(06:19):
the end of the day, they're just trying to get
you out because you're old, so.

Speaker 4 (06:21):
Like right right right right?

Speaker 1 (06:23):
I love her.

Speaker 4 (06:23):
Yeah, she's very status.

Speaker 1 (06:25):
So she okay. So she has a story about it.
She was working first on a flight to Tokyo and
she was going through the aisles and she was like chicken,
her fish, Chicken, her fish, chicken, her fish. And then
she got to someone and there said fish and she
was like, oh, I'm sorry, we ran out of fisher
row ago and he goes, well, I want my row ago,
like totally like I had no idea what she said.

(06:45):
The fishers called fish a row ago yeah, and he
was like and he was just like, well, I want
my row ago fish fish.

Speaker 3 (06:55):
I am on this fight. I am an American. I
have paid my price.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
Where the hell is my a row ago? And then
my mom was like, no, no, we ran out of
fish a row ago And he was like chicken. He
was just one of his just like fuck you you.
I love first of all, that is such good energy,
and I do especially love that I was on a
plane this was like five years ago, but I couldn't
help it. I was getting puncured up because lady next

(07:20):
to me kept saying, do you like Kelly Cloxton? And
I was like and I was like, yeah, she's great,
and she's like yeah. She kept saying the full name,
and I was like, does she want me to correct her?
Is this going to be a for a while? But anyway,
Ellen was in her ear, Ellen Kelly, Oh my god.
Classic prank, classic prank. Classic.

Speaker 3 (07:38):
I was on a flight and I had just I'm
a divorce a. I had just gotten engaged in Dublin
and I was on a flight.

Speaker 1 (07:46):
I never knew that.

Speaker 3 (07:47):
Yes, I was on a flight coming back, like an
overnight flight from Dublin back to LA and I woke
up because a woman was screaming, like the plane's going down,
the plane's going down. And that woman was me, what.

Speaker 1 (07:59):
You yourself up screaming Yeah, everyone on that way, So
you were having.

Speaker 4 (08:03):
Like a night terror.

Speaker 3 (08:04):
I was having a night terror. I fully screaming nightsair. No,
maybe that should have been a shine. Maybe there's other
things happening in my body. Yeah, maybe other warnings I
had ject I had been engaged.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
Was he on the flight back?

Speaker 3 (08:18):
Yeah, we were side by side. It's beautifully new and
newly betrothed, newly engaged Queen's fiance his twenty four hour
fiance plane is going screaming, absolute blood curdling screaming, waking
herself and everyone up on the flight twenty four hours
after she got engaged.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
Well d When we have taken flights together to Boston,
there was one time where I can't remember how it
was like Arden thought we should have been lowered to
the ground than we were when we thought we were landing,
and then he ended up having.

Speaker 4 (08:44):
To go a little further.

Speaker 1 (08:45):
I guess, oh my god, you practically did wake up
out of a dead sleep, and you were like, what's
going on? What's going on like that?

Speaker 3 (08:51):
If I don't back to drive, how are they going
to get the plane?

Speaker 1 (08:54):
I'd sleep.

Speaker 4 (08:55):
Sleep isn't good for you.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
You need to help sleeping. It's changing you this, I
tell you, yes, absolutely stop. If you don't look your
worse than, how are you gonna look your best?

Speaker 3 (09:06):
Exactly?

Speaker 1 (09:09):
Bottom? How you gonna.

Speaker 4 (09:12):
Exactly?

Speaker 3 (09:13):
Okay, that's a great first of all production team. Hello. Okay,
let's hear your second nomination.

Speaker 1 (09:23):
Okay, hold on, sipper Water.

Speaker 3 (09:26):
I know I've heard about it.

Speaker 1 (09:27):
I try. It's so good.

Speaker 3 (09:28):
I'm scared of it.

Speaker 1 (09:29):
It's really good. It's everywhere. Okay, So I did a
lot of community theater. I was in Gigi as Gaston community.

Speaker 4 (09:39):
I never knew this either.

Speaker 1 (09:41):
On opening night of Gig and Brownswell Texas at the
Camil Lightner Playhouse, I won't say her name, but a
friend's mom, I was like in the wings and I
was supposed to like chat her on her like it
was like a cafe set and there's like a scene
going on between like them Chevalier rolling and and I
was supposed to chaperone her out and then we sit

(10:01):
down and we're just basically background for the whole scene,
even though I was the lead. And then your star
thank you? Uh well yeah, Brownswell Texas, we're all the
biggest stars who have ever signed in the world. Was
a movie critic in Brownsville in high school. He would
go on the this is really you know, I was
a TV reporter, doogie howser, but he would go on

(10:24):
the local news and discuss what write is, well that is,
isn't that that's a gutter? Right?

Speaker 3 (10:32):
That's also please energy? Honestly, was I know, honestly was
an expert on being a teen.

Speaker 1 (10:39):
And these like alcoholics who were at the station, like
all these like kids got it.

Speaker 4 (10:43):
Yeah, you should have.

Speaker 1 (10:48):
I wouldn't own that town or I would be dead
by now. Somebody would have taken me down for sure. Okay.
So then we're waiting in the wings and like right
before so she's also, what's it ensemble when what you
call it in theater when it's well yeah, she was yeah,
you know, like somebody's mom basically yeah, and like she
turns to me right before we go out, and she
goes quick, quick, give me a kiss, like full my

(11:10):
friend's mom. She is like fifty five, probably sixty, And
I was like what She's like, it's the opening night,
give me a kiss. No, he makes out with me? What,
Like yeah, I'm okay, I'm not traumatized. No, no, no, no, no,
I know yeah yeah again most people would say that,
but like yeah, it was just like fully made out

(11:31):
with my friends, like just like she like fully made
out with me. And then she was like let's go.
So we would shopper and then I arm an arm
and then we just sat down and like mine talking
like you like like not as though we like went
on stage and was like ah, like it was just
like and then we like quietly sat in a chair.

Speaker 3 (11:50):
So her mom was backstage.

Speaker 1 (11:52):
Yeah, his mom was in the chorus. Yeah, and so
she was like background for the first was in a high.

Speaker 3 (11:59):
School production because she was another person in the Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:03):
And you know how like sometimes it's like moms and
kids or like parents and no matter.

Speaker 3 (12:07):
What, all the worse they are like let me give
you a shoulder massage, Let's do a full massage circle,
let's do like like this, like liberty to have the
most at all times, completely so.

Speaker 1 (12:18):
Much insane because also I was in Hair and there
was this woman in our production of Hair who was like,
sit on my lap, like she was like forty five.
She was like, sit on my lap, Sit on my lap,
and she like started like petting me, and she's like,
you know, you remind me of the men in Jesus's Time?

Speaker 4 (12:34):
What does that mean?

Speaker 1 (12:37):
Pale with a red afro like block like no, probably
not are I was? I was, Yeah, it it went away.
I don't know what.

Speaker 3 (12:45):
But by the way, operating system makes sense. If you
got if you grow up as the ginger that you
make the like you're internal, like that's a specific You
get a little smunk because.

Speaker 1 (12:54):
You got your the yeah, yeah, yeah, did you know
that people with red hair I don't insult people very early.
People with red hair usually are horrible. Apparently, apparently they
can handle more pain than put myself to. That's us.

Speaker 4 (13:15):
You didn't look how great it turn you know?

Speaker 1 (13:17):
And then she gave me her dad's dog tags from
Vietnam to wear for throughout all of hair. She's like,
I'm a shoot on my dad's dog TAXI died in Vietnam.

Speaker 3 (13:24):
So you have an older woman coming and going he
did community.

Speaker 4 (13:29):
Do you want to know why?

Speaker 1 (13:30):
Because I think I feel like when you were young,
because I've seen you on that TV report When you
were you did look sophisticated, right, I really wanted to
be that. I was like very like, I'm I'm I'm
going places.

Speaker 4 (13:41):
Yes, I got it. But I could see how older
women would.

Speaker 1 (13:44):
Fall for you.

Speaker 3 (13:44):
In Texas. They're like and they're may be married to
like like the fact that he's like he gets it,
you know what I mean, like he gets it. He's
I can talk to him. I can't talk to like buddy,
I can tell.

Speaker 4 (13:55):
I got to say.

Speaker 1 (13:56):
Nothing is more known to agraphs who's energy to me
than the day I went to the Opasto Community Theater
and saw a full production of his street current desire.

Speaker 4 (14:05):
Why these local theaters, dude, put these shows.

Speaker 1 (14:10):
I think I was like eight and my aunt and
even then I was like, it seems like it's got bones,
but this is.

Speaker 4 (14:19):
What it's amazing.

Speaker 1 (14:21):
My history teacher who and they're.

Speaker 4 (14:22):
So sweet and so they're they're they're not getting paid yea.

Speaker 1 (14:26):
They want yeah, and they want to feel like stars.
I mean my my history teacher who was like she
came from ranch money. She was like popular, she was
the cheerleader.

Speaker 3 (14:32):
She was future president. I mean she was.

Speaker 1 (14:37):
Ranch money and she was in like wait until dark,
you know. So just like imagine like being in high
school and then seeing your like you know, your popular
girl like history teacher, then being a production where she's
like blind in the lights around and she's like like
running into.

Speaker 3 (14:49):
Glass out of teachers like cry or out of child
as a human being, or any vulnerability out of Texas.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
Why absolutely.

Speaker 3 (15:01):
I had a vision of a theater production that I
was in freshman year in college in Colorado and an
all white production, and I think we were all in
full KOBOOKI makeup y sure that we had to learn
how to apply and put on, but I had it
came to me, Like last week, I was like, I

(15:23):
think there's photos of me in full kabook.

Speaker 1 (15:25):
You should kill everyone who has a book. That should
be That's actually a really good idea for a movie.
It is somebody who has to go back and kill
all the photos of don't want to be an influencer.

Speaker 4 (15:34):
I don't want to be famous. That's actually brilliant.

Speaker 3 (15:36):
Yeah, I think we were all I think that was
the assignment. All of us were in full kabookie makeup.

Speaker 1 (15:41):
Yeah, well, the production of hair. There's the song black
Boys there. It was behind a scrim with okay, but
that's still something it was. It was there's a song
black Boys, White Boys is like a two song, and
there were like I was one of the only white
people in the ton I grew up in and there
were no black people. So they changed it to nice Boys,
Bad Boys, but then kept all the like chocolate flavored

(16:02):
love like vanilla vanilla hunt, like you know, just like
it like it's so it's just like, what the fuck
are you talking about? A time nice boys as like crackers.
It's like it's like, what are you talking There was
some school, there was some school in Salt Was. There
were some school in Salt Lake City that did a
production of Rent. This was a while ago, and they

(16:22):
were it was like a Mormon school, so they changed
it to be about diabetes.

Speaker 4 (16:26):
But also for real, for real, they changed it to
be about diabetes.

Speaker 1 (16:32):
And it was like I was in and like everything.
Of course, someone break. It was just people scared to
tell each other that they had diabetes. Basically, that's so good.

Speaker 4 (16:42):
I want I want the book. I want it.

Speaker 3 (16:45):
If I could go back in time and do one thing,
I would go be in the audience of a production.

Speaker 4 (16:49):
Of that Rent Diabetes.

Speaker 3 (16:51):
Now do you have a nominee for no autographs? Please? Centers.

Speaker 1 (16:54):
You know what runs runs absolutely story exactly the story
of getting runts out of the town.

Speaker 4 (17:07):
Like the Pied Piper.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
Okay, honestly, I'm going to count that and the other thing,
but I will. The only other one I was going
to bring in was the store Fresh and Easy. Do
they still have that store? I don't think I know
what that is. It's the worst, really, it's so bare.
But they were the first ones to like make you
really do self checkout.

Speaker 4 (17:25):
And the walls there was.

Speaker 3 (17:30):
On the walls have no product. There's nothing they're selling,
not the walls.

Speaker 1 (17:34):
That makes it easy. Yeah, the walls are gray, and
we're talking about in a grocery store. It's so stunning.
And the floors aren't carpeted, but they might as well be,
and you would walk through those aisles everything, you know
what I love because this you don't see, This is
very fresh for the United States. You never see in
a grocery store's prices with whole numbers, do you know
what I mean? We never see something's like two point

(17:54):
zero sere dollars store. So I thought that was very fresh,
not very like like a doll house versus it look
it looked like you were in North Korea and they
reporters there to be like, look how we're living, you
know what I mean? Yeah, it felt like it felt
like a too fresh and easy box please exactly. So
so fresh and easy. Really, I think paved the way

(18:15):
for doing a terrible job and not caring enough to really,
oh they don't care. That was my only nomination.

Speaker 3 (18:20):
I have a nomination that was it was sent in
from a listener and it was one that like, I
can't believe we haven't done yet. Can we just shout
out the glorious Rachel dolozol Oh.

Speaker 4 (18:30):
He did talk about her episode for a second.

Speaker 3 (18:33):
Okay, will you explained to our listener.

Speaker 4 (18:35):
This one was I believe she worked a blonde white woman.

Speaker 3 (18:40):
But she was like the head of like the N
double A C P and Spokane chapter. Yeah, and she
and she also taught I think. And she was a
white woman who said she was black and worked.

Speaker 1 (18:55):
For the N double A C starkening her skin doing
stuff and she would stage race a the tacks on
herself too, Like she would like like she would like
throw things at her car, and like she'd leave school
and be like, can you believe what happened to me?
And like this happened?

Speaker 3 (19:09):
Can I real moonshouse and shout out to do you
guys watch Righteous Gemstones I have?

Speaker 1 (19:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (19:17):
One of the things that made me last on the
throw they.

Speaker 1 (19:20):
Were he's so funny.

Speaker 3 (19:21):
They were doing vocal warm ups backstage. I think it
was like two seasons ago. They were doing vocal warm
ups about something they were about to go on and
one of the characters, I think it was what's his name,
Like Danny mcgride kept going Jesse Smollett, Jesse. Yeah, doing
that is a vocal warm up. It wasn't aside, it
just made me last all right, Well, there we go.

(19:44):
Those are our nominees. Charles, so fun, such a joy
to have you on.

Speaker 1 (19:48):
Thank you for having me.

Speaker 4 (19:49):
I'll see you later now.

Speaker 3 (19:51):
Of course, there's any any podcast that.

Speaker 4 (19:53):
Has a natural on normal days, we do the rest
of it with a guests.

Speaker 3 (19:56):
Oat wait wait wait wait, as any podcast that has
a nice, easy flow, naturally you nominate people. If there
are no autographs, please energy and then after the break
you come back and you do a fully improvised date.
So for our new listeners, Brian and I will be
going on an improvised first date and it has to

(20:18):
end well. And when you hear this sound, that means
we are about to say lines that have been emailed
in or DMD to us. You can DM us we
are on Instagram. You could do naps pod and just
send us at the DM or you can email us
at naps pod the number one at Gmail. Brian and
I will be on a first date. Charles will come
in as the rest of the world could be. Our

(20:40):
ex lovers are Firmer car and lovers, the people that
work at the place that we're having our date. Anything
and we can jump through space and time. Charles, will
you give us the two names of people that you
grew up with or that are funny names and people
you know that Brian's name and my name Buzz great great.

Speaker 1 (20:58):
And full name? Yes, well name Nikki Patriarcha.

Speaker 3 (21:06):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (21:08):
Wow?

Speaker 3 (21:10):
Why was she related? Because there was a Patriarchy crime
family in Providence, Rhode Islands. Oh really they ran the
town hunting.

Speaker 1 (21:15):
Maybe nick maybe it'll get back to her that I
used her full name. We were never closed all the time.

Speaker 3 (21:21):
Shoud we do it out of Chili's.

Speaker 1 (21:22):
Let's do it?

Speaker 3 (21:23):
Okay, when we come back, Buzz and Nicky Patriarcha are
going to be going on a date. Oh oh, I
love an awesome blossom.

Speaker 4 (21:43):
Oh hey awsome, that's the nickname.

Speaker 1 (21:45):
I just can't give you be forgots on the Maniu
because it's not that clever.

Speaker 3 (21:47):
Uh, Miss Patriarcha.

Speaker 4 (21:50):
Oh you want me to call you?

Speaker 1 (21:51):
Yeah, miss patriarchs Okay, Miss patriot I'm yeah, my name's Buzz.
But you say buzz, you don't say bis Buz, Buz,
don't make the noise. My name is just Buzz Okay,
but anyway.

Speaker 3 (22:03):
Oh, you should follow me on Twitter what's your handle at,
miss B. If you're nasty?

Speaker 4 (22:12):
Okay, I don't know.

Speaker 1 (22:14):
This for a fact, Miss P, if you're nasty, but
I just want to get this out there so that
we don't run into issues later. Okay, you're a communist, right,
because I'm a Christian and that's a real deal breaker
for me.

Speaker 3 (22:26):
Oh boy, I am a communist. And I'm glad that
you saw my that you read about my all my columns.
I was as a child. I actually was a reporter
and I would go on and I would say that
young people can be communist. You on the local news,
maybe you saw me.

Speaker 4 (22:41):
I think I did. Actually you were the one.

Speaker 3 (22:44):
Do you want to photograph so you could remember that
this was real?

Speaker 1 (22:47):
I guess so?

Speaker 4 (22:47):
Should we asked the host to take a picture.

Speaker 3 (22:48):
Yeah, let's see it, sir, Sir gar Sack.

Speaker 1 (22:55):
You know what, No, I have to tell you something
about this generation. Yes, so rude. They're on their phones all.

Speaker 3 (22:59):
All the time.

Speaker 4 (23:00):
Who are you texting?

Speaker 3 (23:01):
I want to know who are you texting?

Speaker 1 (23:02):
I'm texting my mom's babysitter.

Speaker 4 (23:05):
Who what's wrong with your mom?

Speaker 1 (23:07):
She's a fucking baby?

Speaker 3 (23:09):
Your mom's a baby?

Speaker 1 (23:11):
Yeah? You know what? What you're a skirt.

Speaker 4 (23:14):
Yeah, I agree you look I chose.

Speaker 3 (23:16):
To wear a jumpsuit, so sue me. They don't make
jumpsuit skirts. It's just a dress.

Speaker 1 (23:21):
I know you're just the host, but I wanted to know.
I'll take a glass of Marlowe please. Oh so you're
into shit, big time, big time into shit.

Speaker 3 (23:31):
Look, I want you to know that I'm I'm not
vegetarian vegan because generally my empathy doesn't extend to animals,
so I don't even like the taste. I just like
to eat me.

Speaker 1 (23:44):
Well that makes sense because you got really strong, meaty thighs.

Speaker 4 (23:46):
Do you know what I have a sad question for you?
Could you read it like a table?

Speaker 1 (23:51):
That's I called to make a reservation, but apparently you
guys don't take them. We haven't seen them. Do you
have a nine to eleven? Oh? Shit? You know what?
What did that have to do with preservations at Chili's?

Speaker 3 (24:01):
Sorry? I need to sorry, I need to do a text.
I'm at Chili's with Buzz. It's not my finest hour. Okay,
I'm back.

Speaker 1 (24:11):
Okay, do you think we could get together another time?
I want to have a bath right now? Well, I
did I I only took a shower, and usually if
I'm on a date, I scrub so hard that I
welt and I don't feel clean unless I'm hurt.

Speaker 3 (24:26):
I did notice you had a lot of well solick.
Can we get a table please?

Speaker 2 (24:29):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (24:29):
Get a table for two?

Speaker 1 (24:30):
Please? Yeah? I gotta say, like, I'm tired of y'all's chemistry.
Would you just point out other men that you want
to have sex with?

Speaker 3 (24:36):
I'm looking at one right now.

Speaker 1 (24:40):
Wo.

Speaker 4 (24:40):
If you want to get with me, you.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
Got to know that my great granduncle was the Nazi
war minister.

Speaker 3 (24:47):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (24:48):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (24:48):
First of all, I would really really not brag about that.
Everybody's into that.

Speaker 3 (24:54):
Ship, you know exactly? Chi okay? Is that?

Speaker 4 (25:00):
Could we please?

Speaker 1 (25:01):
I beg a few on my knees, on my burnt
up knees for my back, I beg of you. Could
we please get a table for two and two menus
and I'll take a glass of Marlow please? All right,
I can do that for you. What are you all
going to do for me?

Speaker 3 (25:20):
Well, I'm an as long as it's not tofu because
generally my empathy doesn't extend to animals.

Speaker 1 (25:26):
Yeah, hold on, let me just send this text real quick.
Britain would have won the war on its own without
the US. I'm not an apologist for empire, but our
empire would have helped us win. Sorry, the station, I
have to do the little chiron that goes by on
the screen. I gotta do a live every circuit.

Speaker 4 (25:46):
Wow, hustle, Wow.

Speaker 3 (25:48):
You gotta be a multi hyphen it now.

Speaker 1 (25:50):
Yeah, they filled me on TaskRabbit. As I mentioned before,
I am a Christian and what I want as a
Christian in this world? Okay, in twenty one nine, the
year we're in, good signs ahead.

Speaker 4 (26:06):
And good times. I have predict wonderful things.

Speaker 3 (26:09):
Oh, my next year is gonna be my year.

Speaker 1 (26:11):
All I want as a red blooded American man is
to be served a glass of Marlow.

Speaker 3 (26:19):
I would also like it.

Speaker 4 (26:20):
And be sat in a corner booth where I can
have privacy.

Speaker 1 (26:26):
There's just something about every time you ask for that,
my mind drifts and I'm just like, damn like I
am glad Nelson Mandela is dead. He was a real terrorists.

Speaker 4 (26:34):
Holy fuck, I tell you this is you know what?

Speaker 1 (26:38):
This is?

Speaker 5 (26:39):
What this is?

Speaker 1 (26:40):
What this is? What's the top of my head?

Speaker 3 (26:42):
You know what? I just don't think you love Jesus enough.

Speaker 4 (26:46):
That's coming from a communist.

Speaker 1 (26:48):
Yeah, well you're in the ship.

Speaker 4 (26:50):
Okay, I have to I have to tell you.

Speaker 5 (26:52):
Okay, I just want to I read, I beg I
am on my knees, knees, kimberly akimbo, begging you, but
begging you, but begging you know what?

Speaker 3 (27:07):
I prefer traditional sixty nine.

Speaker 1 (27:10):
Hold on, hold on, you haven't even had a glass
of marlow yet. You talk about that mouse. I'll get you,
get you a drink, Okay, I'll get you, guys your dreams.
But you gotta know I have to leave after one
drink because in the fridge that needs to be used tonight.

Speaker 4 (27:24):
We're not inviting you for a drink. No, I'm happy I.

Speaker 3 (27:28):
Get to have the Marlowe.

Speaker 1 (27:29):
Look, guys, well I'll have it over here away for
you guys, have your Marl.

Speaker 4 (27:34):
Do you mind if I do a little praying?

Speaker 3 (27:36):
Okay?

Speaker 4 (27:37):
Yeah, and I really mean a little praying.

Speaker 1 (27:45):
You know what.

Speaker 4 (27:45):
Hold on?

Speaker 3 (27:47):
Your teachers aren't a tot in real life. This they
looked in your profile.

Speaker 1 (27:52):
I want to know.

Speaker 4 (27:53):
I really actually am curious. So you're clearly in QAnon.

Speaker 1 (27:56):
You clearly are an apologist for every evil empire that
ever this world.

Speaker 4 (28:01):
Yeah, and you write the news, Chiron, How did you
get hired?

Speaker 1 (28:05):
I get that you got hired and Chili's actually what
I don't get is how you got hired at the news? Yeah?
What was the interview process? Cut to the interview. Hi,
we're here. Uh, we are a couple. We're beautiful. My
name is Monica, my name is johnnik and Chasdine Chazz.

(28:27):
We are we love.

Speaker 3 (28:30):
This is where just like a mom and pop business
built with the news, we.

Speaker 1 (28:33):
Became extreme extreme hoarders and it had to leave being
the anchors of the news. But we do own the
station now for you. That's so, why do you think
you should be on local news? I think because like
the people that inspired me most, like oh mao, Polpot
Hillers loll in like these gods. Right, you want to
know something? But I've never heard of any of those people.

(28:55):
As far as I'm you sound smart.

Speaker 3 (28:59):
I have also not heard of any of them. So
I think he knows more than we do. And I
think that people would really like what they are.

Speaker 1 (29:05):
You're hired. Take a letter back to the restaurant. So
it was a couple, yo, Okay, I did want to
say one thing before. I truly I am.

Speaker 4 (29:18):
I am doing a cat cow in front of him.

Speaker 1 (29:21):
Huh.

Speaker 3 (29:21):
I'm literally very limber lower.

Speaker 1 (29:23):
Back and you're missing part of your spine, you know?

Speaker 4 (29:27):
Is that? Am I really? Because I got to say
something happens to me.

Speaker 1 (29:31):
But don't worry because you're the second hottest guy at
this bar.

Speaker 3 (29:35):
Well thanks? Are you the first?

Speaker 1 (29:38):
Yeah? Hell? I wanted to do a little praying before
and I want and I as I do mean little Okay, Okay,
you said that God, can you please let it's going
to keep with me?

Speaker 2 (29:52):
No?

Speaker 1 (29:54):
Oh my god, that's God.

Speaker 4 (30:01):
Yeah, Oh my god, I can't.

Speaker 1 (30:04):
I been waiting my whole life to meet you.

Speaker 3 (30:06):
I was a communist before, but now I think that
I didn't love Jesus enough.

Speaker 4 (30:10):
Well, I want to tell you something and I want
you to hear this directly from me. Okay, gee dash
d Yeah.

Speaker 1 (30:18):
Women who are close to God, no, they don't need
oral sex to feel pleasure with a man. Oh hell yeah. Okay,
I spread that message all the way from up here
down to you. I'll say it again. Women who are
close to God, no, they don't need oral sex to
feel pleasure with the man.

Speaker 3 (30:37):
What by.

Speaker 1 (30:40):
By God.

Speaker 3 (30:41):
Wow, Why God did you miss hear that?

Speaker 1 (30:44):
Yeah, I've been waiting my whole life to hear that
from God.

Speaker 3 (30:46):
You don't like going down because I gotta say I
prefer traditional sixty nine.

Speaker 1 (30:52):
I'll take a glass of Marlow. Please listen.

Speaker 5 (30:54):
I want us to know.

Speaker 3 (30:54):
You said in your profile that you're a twin, and
I just want to get out right up top. My
family doesn't belie leave twins are real.

Speaker 4 (31:01):
Well, I don't know if we're really vibing, but maybe
you'd like my twin.

Speaker 3 (31:07):
Yeah, yeah, my family doesn't believe twins are real.

Speaker 1 (31:13):
Well, I'll tell you they are. In fact, I'm gonna
get my twin in here because he's been waiting in
the car. Well, my name is Buzz, his name is
Hatchatcha came into Hatcha.

Speaker 3 (31:27):
She did not.

Speaker 1 (31:28):
She said that she didn't believe in twins.

Speaker 4 (31:29):
But look what up?

Speaker 1 (31:32):
We are twins.

Speaker 4 (31:39):
Hot chat chat. We were in Chicago together and.

Speaker 1 (31:41):
You've got the same You believe that we've got the
same thing.

Speaker 4 (31:48):
You and I mean that's yeah, we're exactly alike.

Speaker 3 (31:51):
Okay, is your dad coming back soon? Do you think
we can get him involved?

Speaker 1 (31:54):
Is dad still in the car No, he's peeing, and
actually I think that we should all pee because I'm
where because you know, I'd be remiss if I didn't
mention what a pussy you are for breaking the seal
before me.

Speaker 4 (32:09):
Yeah, he's a real hound dog.

Speaker 3 (32:10):
Okay, we haven't had sex yet. He didn't break the
seal with me, as.

Speaker 4 (32:14):
God just spoke to us.

Speaker 1 (32:15):
I didn't even think of it. I was thinking of
it as like when you pee and you break the seal.
I'm trying understand the logic of this. Do you put
like tape over your penis? And then yeah, it's like
when you finally I think, what's the seal? I love it?

Speaker 3 (32:32):
First of all. I love that you were a cape
on a Tuesday.

Speaker 1 (32:35):
Thank you, because I don't I wear back liss T shirts.

Speaker 3 (32:38):
Oh you have a back with T shirt?

Speaker 1 (32:40):
I do? Actually, Oh hotch an apology why I didn't
intend to be mean when I said your pubic hair
was the longest side of her saying oh it's okay,
what you meant Okay, I didn't want to be Well,
let's just say I tuck it into my socks.

Speaker 3 (33:00):
Is it tugged it right out of yours?

Speaker 1 (33:02):
It's tucked into my socks and my back can feel
the breeze.

Speaker 4 (33:06):
You know, if I chose it means I'm sexually frustrated.

Speaker 1 (33:09):
God, do you want to.

Speaker 3 (33:10):
Get a photographs? You can remember? This was real?

Speaker 5 (33:12):
You guys?

Speaker 4 (33:13):
Yeah, hatcha should we get a picture with us?

Speaker 1 (33:15):
I would love that. Okay, has to be in the picture,
the picture. Okay, I'll do it selfie my arms as
you'll see. Yes, very very say three two one you.

Speaker 3 (33:26):
In the ship, you guys. I just want to say,
I think my favorite movie is I Now pronounce you
Chuck and Larry.

Speaker 4 (33:39):
That was so good for it was so woke.

Speaker 1 (33:41):
I gotta say, I didn't believe. I didn't believe in
gay people until I saw that movie. But even though
they were straight playing gay, Yeah, I didn't believe in that.

Speaker 3 (33:48):
But then you felt beata and they didn't. You thought
they didn't exist like twins.

Speaker 1 (33:53):
You thought they didn't exist like twins.

Speaker 3 (33:55):
You thought they didn't exist like twins.

Speaker 1 (33:56):
Listen, it's how I knew I was gay.

Speaker 3 (34:00):
I want to say something, and that movie helped you
come out.

Speaker 1 (34:03):
Yeah, I sit up in front of that whole movie
theater and I said, I'm gay. I want to repologize.
I might stab my job. Can I just issue an
apology to everyone standing behind us waiting for a table?

Speaker 4 (34:14):
Yes, I want to just say.

Speaker 1 (34:17):
I'm taxing the news.

Speaker 4 (34:18):
Hold on, listen.

Speaker 1 (34:20):
I am so disgusted by my experience here. Originally that
I didn't think I was hungry, but I have to say,
you have all worn me down.

Speaker 4 (34:30):
I've had a beautiful time.

Speaker 1 (34:33):
I have to be frank. I decided on the walk
here that I'm not into this, but I'll buy you
a drink if I ever see around town.

Speaker 3 (34:38):
Well, I was about to say, before you go, do
you have a five dollar bill? I want one more
Marlow and it's cash only.

Speaker 1 (34:45):
I do have one more five dollars bill, but it's
literally my last five dollars.

Speaker 3 (34:49):
I have it. Fine, But how are we going to
find each other if you already decided that it wasn't
gonna work.

Speaker 1 (34:54):
I sell fake coins to defraud the elderly, So just
stick around old people and I'll see it there.

Speaker 3 (34:59):
Oh, so you think maybe we could defraud some old
people together?

Speaker 1 (35:02):
Wait, you want to be my partner in this? I mean,
are you in a host? Host? Yeah? Hold on, I'm
just texting the news.

Speaker 4 (35:10):
Uh, wear a skirt great, All right, let's get out
of here.

Speaker 3 (35:15):
This went really well. And I do prefer traditional sixty nine.

Speaker 1 (35:19):
That's fine. I do more than have sex. I make
love you and a shit.

Speaker 3 (35:37):
And we're back. Okay, Charles, how did you think the
date went?

Speaker 1 (35:41):
I thought it went well. I mean, you guys were
you know, bombarded with other people. I have to tell
you same page. You played a true sacon. But I
cannot believe your list of people say these are all real.

Speaker 4 (35:51):
I can't believe people said this ship.

Speaker 3 (35:52):
What was your favorite line that I think my great.

Speaker 1 (35:54):
Grand uncle was the Nazi war minister, because it doesn't
it's like Nazi war, like the wording of like Nazi war.

Speaker 4 (36:02):
That's your problem with it, not the fact that someone
said that.

Speaker 3 (36:05):
Yeah, the whole thing is so why yeah, just.

Speaker 1 (36:07):
Figure, I agree, I agree, and your grammar. Frankly, by the.

Speaker 3 (36:11):
Way, Brian, how lovely is it that so many of
the lines are from people who like our listeners. They've
sent them in I think everyone. Okay, So here's the
ones I had. We're from Andy. I'm gonna say they're
name wrong. I'm sorry, Andy, Cassakiro, Megan A. Woodley, Phoebe Johnson,
Emily Herrera, Jordan Tierney, Michael Potsik, Jessica Jones, Sidney Fanny, Anya, Marina,

(36:36):
Eliza Flugg and Mary.

Speaker 1 (36:38):
Neppie, j Blazing Hello, Hi, Tommy, Adam, Lady, Kirsten Leslie, Penny, Amelia, Christian,
The Boy Who Bakes, Lori, Laurie td Curran, Cameron, Erica Boone,
Vivone twenty seven, Kristin Nogg, Genevieve Engelson, VJ Just, Ronnie Monk,
Taco tamber La Perry, Mary Neppie, Isaac Boots, Phoebe Johnson,

(37:02):
Dance Wet eighty six, April flutter Ish and code x
O HM. Now listen. Yeah, you can always write to
us at napspod one at gmail dot com with your
lines or DM at napspod and also please rate, review
and subscribe to the podcast because you could hear some
fucking you can write some flavu. Let's fucking shit for us,

(37:22):
you know.

Speaker 3 (37:23):
Oh, we got some fun reviews. Do you want to
hear some of our reviews?

Speaker 4 (37:27):
I'm all, here's okay.

Speaker 3 (37:29):
Here's reviews. Bry the way, Brian, We're up to three, okay,
let's see. I will tell you how many we have, right?
I think it's three twenty five, which is amazing.

Speaker 4 (37:38):
It's great.

Speaker 3 (37:38):
Three twenty six.

Speaker 1 (37:39):
We gotta we had a penny for every single one
of those, we'd have three dollars in twenty six.

Speaker 3 (37:43):
Oh what would you buy?

Speaker 1 (37:44):
Probably a car? Oh my god, this is a Maserati Testeroni.

Speaker 3 (37:47):
Oh my god. Okay, so this one is five stays,
but this is absolutely hilarious. Five stars. Lexi underscore G
two four three. She said, I had no idea this
show would be so funny. The one liners during the
improv bring me to tears laughing, and I so look
forward to the peanut butter sweet Potato egg no egg

(38:09):
cag reviews at the end of every episode. Can I
discuss the fact that people have just accepted that the
worst idea for a podcast is actually like a fun
segment that they like completely cooking baking as ridiculous when
we're not.

Speaker 1 (38:22):
Good at it, Bailey fifty one times eighty seven says,
I laugh so hard I don't need to do planks.

Speaker 4 (38:28):
Five stars.

Speaker 1 (38:28):
I look forward to every podcast brought to us by
the ridiculously talented Arden and Brian, along with the roster
of equally funny guests. They make improv look easy. Let's
put it this way. The show is the equivalent of
Belgium's purest and finest chocolate. I expect the folks from
Michelin will suit list Arden's bougie garage and award five
stars to their insane We're waiting, We're Micheline May Yeah, We're.

Speaker 3 (38:52):
I also love two reviews back to back that are
very similar. Susannah five stars hosts are unhinged, highly recommend,
but it.

Speaker 4 (39:01):
Actually says the host are unhinged Mania.

Speaker 3 (39:03):
I didn't see that. The next one is five stars
delightfully chaotic. Recommending this pod to all my clients, I.

Speaker 1 (39:13):
Have to say, remember, please rate, review, subscribe, will shout
you out on the show, and you can go to
Apple Podcasts to rate, subscribe, review, and also just listen
everywhere and please tell your friends it helps the show.

Speaker 3 (39:27):
Because right now we're just doing fifteen, baby, but we
want to do a thousand. We do now, Charles, we're
trying to become lifestyle influencers. We have a gorgeous mug,
the pensive gentleman.

Speaker 1 (39:37):
Charlie Day Jordan from this Islie.

Speaker 3 (39:40):
This is Charlie Day. And because we're vain and we
have to keep it tight for a Speedo season.

Speaker 4 (39:45):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (39:46):
So this is all very low fat.

Speaker 1 (39:49):
Low cot so eat and very low fi and very
low rent.

Speaker 3 (39:55):
Did you bring something to I did?

Speaker 4 (39:57):
It went somewhere else, though, we'll find Did tell us
what you brought?

Speaker 3 (40:01):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (40:02):
Yeah, I brought something. It's counteracting and actually it's going
to be bad. Camera terrified this This isn't even point
this one's never even been pointed at me. Do it
to that one? Okay? This is a Smuckers topping. Thirty

(40:24):
coloris per two tables. Do you reading off the ingredient list? Yes? So,
corn syrup, delicious stock. I stuck my fridge up syrup,
corn syrup, non fat milk, very healthy, skinny as cows
on the planet. And then we're okay, so this is exciting.
High fruit, just corn syrup, cyrus. So it's exciting to

(40:47):
see how they'll pair.

Speaker 4 (40:48):
That would be fun.

Speaker 1 (40:50):
Sugar hot love that swaving oil. Sure, cocoa processed with
alkali and cocoa. I love it being processed like that.
I also love go processed with cocoa. Absolutely. Yeah. Well,
you know it's like you got to make it out
of it.

Speaker 3 (41:08):
Guy, Do you love chocolate?

Speaker 1 (41:09):
I like chocolate. I'm not like in love with it.
I'm going to be mono and di glycerides, fabulous sodium
phosphates so it'll shine. Is that what phosphates do? I
never knew.

Speaker 3 (41:22):
When you go swimming at night and there's phosphates in
the water, it glose.

Speaker 1 (41:25):
You mean in the ocean.

Speaker 3 (41:26):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (41:27):
Wow. And then vanillain vanilla artificial flavor. That's character and
killing eve vanilla flavor.

Speaker 3 (41:38):
We also talk about self care.

Speaker 1 (41:40):
This is little chalky promise, it's not broking. Yes, do
you have this exact dish every week?

Speaker 3 (41:45):
No?

Speaker 1 (41:46):
Okay, when we made last week it was different. But
here's we have to understand about pumpkin. Okay, all what
pumpkin does is it acts as a fat. So acts
as like the glue, the glue your heavy cream. You're
a butter, you know what I mean? All that, which

(42:07):
is why, which is why whenever you probably have wondered
why when puppy puppy Goldberg.

Speaker 4 (42:14):
You've probably wondered.

Speaker 1 (42:16):
You probably wonder when people go into bakeries they bring
a can of pumpkin. Yes, I've always wondered.

Speaker 4 (42:23):
Yes, so they do that, You're so.

Speaker 1 (42:26):
They do that because they say, I don't want what
you're making. I want what I'm asking you, right, So
that's why you very very late. So that's why you
always hand a can of pumpkin. By the way, is
that where you're saying, hand a can of pumpkin pumps
from That's where.

Speaker 3 (42:39):
We grew up. This is going to be nice, to
be good, it's gonna be nice.

Speaker 1 (42:48):
And Arden and I were growing up. We were taught
that egg is not dairy, or the egg is dairy.
And we're also taught to handle a can of pumpkin
hand Charles, I know it's scary. What's happening right now?
I promise it's good. So you said you were self sabotage.

Speaker 3 (43:02):
How do you self sabotage you when you get depressed?

Speaker 1 (43:05):
Like?

Speaker 3 (43:05):
What kind of when? How does it manifest for you?

Speaker 4 (43:07):
And what do you what do you doing to get
out of it?

Speaker 1 (43:09):
I say that when I'm like depressed, depressed, my brain
feels wet me too, Like it's like my hair feels wet,
my brain feels my eyes feel wet. Yeah, it's interesting.

Speaker 3 (43:21):
And when it is where you feel like where it's
almost like you're like in a haze and you're like, oh,
this is who I am. Now, Yes, that's how I
It's like you have like a bad pair of eyeglasses
and you're like, oh, this is just how I perceive
things now, So how do you get out of it?

Speaker 1 (43:39):
Working out has changed my life as boring as that
is not boring, it helps. Yeah, it truly. I mean
I'm like with a trainer. Yeah, it's like totally changed everything.
And then you know I did like the other day,
I was running errands and I picked up a lamp
from someone and they said, do you want me to
spray acid and LSD in your mouth? Because I've been

(44:00):
spraying everyone was D today. Wow?

Speaker 4 (44:04):
Was this it like a store or this was someone
you knew? It was?

Speaker 1 (44:07):
West elm I'm just kidding it was.

Speaker 4 (44:11):
They do that there?

Speaker 1 (44:11):
If they do that there? Yeah, this was someone you
obviously see Ellen elm Oh the ELM stands for e
lsd M. Yes, was this someone it was? It was
It's like an art person who made up like anty done.
Then he has like a studio. So it was very
like going to like a hip place and kind of
a thing.

Speaker 4 (44:29):
Did you do it?

Speaker 1 (44:30):
I did it? And I had like all these errands
to run. It was like a little micro dose. I
was gonna say, is it like a micro dose thing? Yeah,
And it was just enough that I was like, I
literally should do this more. Update micro dos one time
and I gotta say it was great and I didn't
feel high. I just felt something up. Yeah. I did
a micro dose at the zoo and the zoo I
went to see Diego with our trash brands right right,

(44:51):
right right, and I did it then and it was
actually very It's it's it's like anything that gets you
out of your head. I'm always scared of and then
when I do it, I'm like, I should be out
of my head more.

Speaker 3 (45:01):
I microdosed mushrooms a few times and I had a
great time. See yeah, I had a great wait to going.

Speaker 1 (45:08):
We're still figuring out the microwave, and so the full
aluminium can of pumpkin isn't the course.

Speaker 3 (45:13):
We have a little it's a full aluminum.

Speaker 1 (45:16):
Can hair spray an iron, yeah, covered and wrap it
in tinp oil exactly.

Speaker 4 (45:25):
Fork.

Speaker 3 (45:28):
Okay, Now I might need another spoon. We might need
one more spoon because this one is now covered in.

Speaker 1 (45:33):
That's all leap from that one. I don't care. And
you should always put the cheese sticks on the other
side of the microwaved it right, that's you don't have
to radiate them, but rad Isn't it crazy that we
were told like never to stick your head, like, never
have your head too close to the microwave.

Speaker 4 (45:46):
It would radiate your brain or something.

Speaker 1 (45:48):
Yeah, we were we were told that and then it
was like you didn't worry about that, yeah, and it's like,
well that's still yeah, right, okay. So that's like if
you put your phone on your cross, do that. And
sometimes I lazily do do that. I will just beat
the ship out of my ball my phone listen anything
that'll do it.

Speaker 4 (46:03):
And you know what sucks.

Speaker 1 (46:04):
I feel like phones don't get warm. They can really Yeah,
when I when I'm like on customer service for like
an hour or something, Yeah, because I just call just
to see how they are.

Speaker 4 (46:13):
Nobody are doing, By the way, someone does need to
check on that. Absolutely.

Speaker 3 (46:17):
Are you guys okay? We're worried about you. You guys
seem really fun.

Speaker 4 (46:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:21):
Are you sure you're okay?

Speaker 3 (46:23):
Sure you're okay?

Speaker 1 (46:24):
I wouldn't be No, I've never shopped with your store,
But are you okay? Okay?

Speaker 3 (46:28):
PO will say to me like are you okay? Are like,
we're worried about you. Don't give me a word.

Speaker 1 (46:33):
Worried about the smartest thing to tell someone though, I'm
worried about like it no, like if somebody is acting
insane to you in public, a stranger being like are
you okay, it's like truly the most empowering thing.

Speaker 4 (46:44):
Yeah okay.

Speaker 1 (46:45):
The other thing is like if somebody is like really
crazy with me on the way, I'm like what was
your name? And then I leave and there's I have
no intention, but it's just like I like that.

Speaker 3 (46:52):
I like, are you okay? That's a good power move. Okay,
so you have a trainer, now, so what else do
you do to get out of it?

Speaker 1 (46:58):
I I started going to this like yoga stretch thing,
and uh, honestly, in my darkest hours, I will like
try to just if I if I have the will
power to get out of my house, Like my secret
favorite day is to just drive to Malibu by myself.
I was doing that during the pandemic. I got to

(47:19):
pick it back up. It was so it's it really
is to change it for you. It's so good for you,
and I forget that, Like I like being with myself,
you know, so like it's nice to remember that. How
about you? I usually go to.

Speaker 3 (47:34):
Ma that chocolate chunk over there, that's your that's your.

Speaker 1 (47:37):
Come on, it's like you drew a portrait of me
after a Saturday night.

Speaker 3 (47:41):
Now you get that, you get the fun, exciting skirt.
It's going to be hot.

Speaker 1 (47:45):
It's going to be hot. So to answer your question, Bran,
I go to Malibu every night for you. I wear
I wear a tux.

Speaker 4 (47:51):
I go to.

Speaker 1 (47:52):
McDonald's and I wor champagne thirty six roses white limo.

Speaker 3 (47:57):
I love myself.

Speaker 4 (47:58):
Take yourself out every night, donald.

Speaker 1 (47:59):
I love the little gets cheaper if you keep taking
it every now.

Speaker 3 (48:02):
Say if they're like, we're back, Okay, how is it?

Speaker 1 (48:06):
How is it? I'm honestly really good.

Speaker 3 (48:11):
I added baking powder and baking it's more of a cake.

Speaker 4 (48:14):
It's delicious. Well, this is the first cake that's risen.

Speaker 3 (48:18):
I ran in researching and I thought, we need a
little bit of soda and a little bit of powder.

Speaker 1 (48:23):
It worked.

Speaker 4 (48:23):
Literally, this cake rose.

Speaker 1 (48:25):
Okay, Charles, So actually I learned something about Trader Joe's recently. Yeah,
the guy that started Trader Joe's, he started it like
Joe his name was the most. He started it in
like the fifties, and he found all this like public
domain like Victoria from Victorian era books, these like prints
that were public domain. So and they've kept it. It's

(48:47):
since changed hands. And I think it's the people that
own all D.

Speaker 4 (48:49):
You know, yes, that's right, they do.

Speaker 1 (48:51):
And so like all of these are just like all D.
When it bought, it was just like just let's just
keep doing that, I guess. So like all of these
random ass like this wonder like nineteen fifties some psycho.

Speaker 4 (49:03):
It's either Hawaiian or tropical. Yeah that was or That's the.

Speaker 1 (49:07):
Thing that doesn't make sense is that he wanted so
he also somehow like world War two, found like all
this like stuff from like the South Pacific and like
from Pearl Harbor and stuff like he got all these
like Hawaiian shirts and stuff for free and signage, so
it's like Hawaiian but Victorian, like it makes no it
makes no sense. That's why it's like all over the place.

Speaker 3 (49:28):
Charles, I'm distracted because we've made.

Speaker 1 (49:31):
It's a critical point zero able to give it. Honestly,
we can take it. We can take that.

Speaker 3 (49:39):
We've given.

Speaker 1 (49:39):
I mean like through the like through the lens of
like what you thought it was actually good? You know,
like it's like a two.

Speaker 4 (49:46):
But I mean like we've been hearing had but through
the real life too, but through the lens, the lens
of like.

Speaker 1 (49:56):
Obviously this is bad. I would honestly be like seven,
you know, like it's not it's obviously not good. No,
I understand, I do.

Speaker 3 (50:05):
I don't understand.

Speaker 1 (50:06):
It's so good, delicious for this kind of this is
for this ideology. It's it's for me. It's a such
I know you want to try it.

Speaker 3 (50:15):
I know you want to try it.

Speaker 1 (50:16):
The best one yet, and don't and grade it on
a on a curve, keep it in your mouth.

Speaker 3 (50:23):
It's the most like of cake.

Speaker 1 (50:26):
Famous last words. Do grade it on a curve. Don't
feel pressure. It's better than normal normal, it's yeah, No,
this is good for what it is. Yeah, it's normal,
just like your mouth normal in the favor of your mouth.

Speaker 4 (50:43):
That's our base, that's our taste of your mouth. Better
or this.

Speaker 1 (50:48):
I would eat it.

Speaker 3 (50:49):
You would definitely need it. Yes, So what do you
give it?

Speaker 1 (50:52):
I'll give it a six?

Speaker 3 (50:54):
Why does it.

Speaker 1 (50:54):
Say because she because she's now she's looking at it
from a real life perspective and so fantasy land. I
had to work this morning, so my mouth is not
you're just filling those holes up.

Speaker 3 (51:10):
I think this is a nine and a half for
a time at g Charles Rogers.

Speaker 1 (51:14):
We can't thank you enough for being Thank you for
having me yellow every time it is George. You know
that's my middle name. Really, I think I forgot that.
They stood for George, Brian George. Yeah, George, Charles, George,
George Shearson. My mom was Sharon, and my parents made
up the name like son of Sharon Shearson, George Charles

(51:36):
she that's actually, by the way, that's actually pretty cool
for parents. Yeah, it's because I had all these like
dad side of the family names, so then it was
like and son of Sharon.

Speaker 4 (51:46):
Yeah, all right, I like it.

Speaker 1 (51:47):
Thank you, Charles, son of Sharon. Thank you for being here.
Following him everywhere at Charles Rogers. Go watch every episode
of First Party and follow follow.

Speaker 3 (51:56):
Them money, give him some spray acid, give him all absolutely.
I am Ali. Yeah, but it's such a joy having
you here, so funny. I love you too. I'm glad
you're here. I think you should have your birthday party
here again. I know you were saying everything.

Speaker 1 (52:11):
It was truly a happy Yeah. Maybe I will just
have to see. I mean, I have to have another birthday.
I just have to see.

Speaker 4 (52:20):
I don't you got to check you you got to
wake up whether or not I'm going to be there. Well, okay,
you know what I mean. Yeah, I get it.

Speaker 1 (52:28):
So no, I maybe you might as well just throw one.
You have to have it.

Speaker 4 (52:33):
Maybe maybe I will. I actually, I actually am panicking.

Speaker 3 (52:36):
Now you don't have to have it.

Speaker 1 (52:37):
But what was it? When is your birthday?

Speaker 4 (52:39):
July thirty?

Speaker 1 (52:40):
Oh my god?

Speaker 4 (52:41):
Yeah it was then when is your birthday?

Speaker 3 (52:43):
But that's been since you've seen it?

Speaker 4 (52:45):
I know, that's what That's what I'm like fucking shocked by.

Speaker 1 (52:47):
That's crazy. Have I not seen you since then? I
mean I know, well I saw you on on Askrona,
so maybe that's what I'm thinking. That's crazy that I
do follow you, so maybe I feel like I see you. Yeah,
that is crazy. We actually do need to hang out,
and I know we're both introvert weirdos.

Speaker 3 (53:02):
But we got to do I think we should go
to the party, all right, I think so too.

Speaker 1 (53:07):
So far, it was so easy I just needed I
just need more fans there. Oh well that's well then
just tell them now Arden's address. Hey everyone, Arden lives
at six sixty nine sixty Avenue. Cut to the poor
family of six Avenue in Monrovia.

Speaker 4 (53:27):
Were things blessed?

Speaker 3 (53:29):
Well they are in Actually they're so lucky to live
at six six six Hell do anything? Yeah, obviously, all right, Charles, Charles.

Speaker 1 (53:37):
All right, thank you guys. I love you. God, bless you, God,
bless you. Who are you wearing?

Speaker 2 (53:47):
Will there be pressed alibis?

Speaker 3 (53:51):
And she come yeah, gotcha and Brian are hearing laugh the.

Speaker 2 (53:59):
Laugh of Project asked, but honey, no, no, no, no
honor grass peace, we live in and the clamor LifeLock
celebrities sharing other favorite Pemi recipes.

Speaker 1 (54:12):
But honey, no, no, no, no auntographs, No

Speaker 4 (54:21):
I got no autograph, no autograph,