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Back to School Week - My boyfriend’s professor is WAY too friendly…and now I’m seriously suspicious! | Part 1
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r/BestofRedditorUpdates - 'Professor' reached out with her side: Do I (28F) need to worry about my boyfriend's (24M) friendship with his professor (25F)?
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Sam, this is John. We're the ancient
two case storytime podcast hosts, and we have some ancient
wisdom in the stories coming up.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
If you want to.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Hear the wisdom from two old heads that know more
than they know what to do with, you're gonna have
to wait for a quick message from our sponsors for
the next two minutes or so.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
So this is part four. But last we left off.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
In this series, we found out about Ope's heart to
heart with their boyfriend. According to her, he agreed to
set some boundaries in place with his ex professor, especially
as their decision to share in Airbnb made both their
partners uncomfortable. However, Opie's boyfriend still insists that Opi and
his ex professor are going to meet to get to
know each other. Will this dinner party crash and burn?
(00:40):
Let's find out. So this is the professor's side, hy
ya yi, Why am I twenty five female always portrayed
as wasted? Maria twenty five female was wasted? Editors not
says there has been some confusion. Maria and Linda are
professor's friends. Maria is the one who can corroborate everything.
(01:01):
I twenty five female and the aforementioned professor and the
best of writer to post about me related to posts
and the subreddit. I decided to post a response after
this event was brought up again with a mutual Maria
twenty five female for both hanging out as I type.
Speaker 4 (01:14):
This, and I think, Okay, maybe the reason she is
replying to this like this is because again she's not
really a professor. Her full time job as an accountant.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
So she does.
Speaker 4 (01:21):
I don't even know if it's like, oh, I might
be losing my job like you're not. Maybe you're your adjuncte.
You know, you're a full time something else.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
She's just in it for the tea.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
She and I have both hung out with boyfriend Bob
in group settings and think there are definitely two sides
of the story. My main gripe is being portrayed as
a wasted man stealer. Below is the original post I
found while browsing Day one. Also, someone did find me
after reading this post due to how specific it is.
I'm responding paragraph by paragraph, so you do not need
(01:52):
to read the original post. Feel free too. So I
was his instructor for one class flash semester that boyfriend
Bob attended. I have no say or sway at the
school and have not taught since then. I taught a
class related to my profession. I did not get to
know Bob personally until after the class was over. On
the last day, he expressed that I was a great
instructor and gave me a miniature he built as a
(02:14):
show of gratitude. I also made miniatures a different type, though,
and it was intrigued that someone else was into this hobby.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
And we stayed in toime.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Nah, this guy knew that you did that before he
gave you that. Right, there's no way.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Maybe, but yeah, maybe maybe she talked about it in class,
but I think it still could have been, like, you know,
like a apple at the end of a.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
I'm immediately suspicious of the way she's framing this because
it sounds like, well, the first he made the first move,
and it's like.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
I don't think I'm asicious.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
I feel like, like that move alone, Like I've given
nice little things to professors, not as much as I should.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I should give more apples to professors.
Speaker 4 (02:50):
Are they apples? Though?
Speaker 2 (02:51):
The nice little things?
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Thice? Little things, little little.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Little things, Yeah, just a little little things.
Speaker 4 (02:58):
A little appreciation, a little.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
Later, I invited a few students for a meal, girls
and guys, and the boys students were the only ones
who are svp'ed.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Yes, Bob did.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
Mention an event I did not invite myself. I said
me and my friend Linda were interested in may Goo too.
Later on, Bob invited me to join their group's airbnb
because I was looking at hotels. A previous event trip
fell through for mine Linda's friend group, and I felt
bad she couldn't go on a trip in the USA
before she had to go back to her home country.
This trip was to replace that experience, and Bob invited
(03:31):
us to the airbnb, and Linda and I shared a
room with two beds, so they had separate beds and everything.
Speaker 4 (03:35):
What do you think I mean, that's that's fine.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Maria ended up coming on this trip as well, which
the group was also okay with, and stayed in the
same room with me and Linda, respectfully. I had one
cocktail and then his friend bought everyone a shot. That
was the extent of my drinking. I wasn't wasted, Linda
wasn't wasted, and no one else in the group ended
up being wasted. Maria was, though Maria underestimated how strong
the drinks were, and she was the DD and did
(04:00):
not have enough time to sober up once she felt
the booze hitter.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
You couldn't drive.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
I didn't want to drive her dad's car and Linda
doesn't have a US driver's license. Bob offered to drive
the car with me, Linda, and Maria back to the airbnb.
The other car was driven back by his friend, who
was not wasted and drove sober. At the Airbnb, Bob
asked what I would do with a model kid I won.
I said, I'm not familiar with that type of miniature,
so I would sell it on Facebook marketplace. He said
(04:26):
it was actually easy to build, he had built one before,
and he can help me build it right then, as
all their tools for building were still out on the table.
I said he didn't have to, but he insisted and
I accepted his help. I was also still not wasted.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
And we've already established building the thing is way less
susce than not building the whole thing.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
I think there was a full model at the end
of this income.
Speaker 4 (04:48):
Yeah, it was like a let's appreciate this thing. Oh,
you don't think you can do something I bet you can,
because this is cool and it can be overwhelming to
build some of those things there. The instructions can be
unclear and difficult tedious.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
So far, though Chat is saying she's lying with seven votes,
I mean, I don't know. I don't think necessarily she is.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
This sounds like exactly what happened, because the boyfriend is like,
all right, well, after y'all had a heart to heart,
all of this comes down to, is the boyfriend to
be trusted in this relationship and everything it is telling me?
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Yes, yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
I think if boyfriend picked up the sense that there
was some level of infatuation or you know.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
I think as soon as he did he like put
that boundary.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Lost coming his way, he'd be like, Hey, let's not
hang out with her anymore. That's freaky, right. Why would
we want to do that? We want to hang out
with the home wrecker who wants to ruin her engagement
and also mess with mine? Like what are we doing?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
I agree? I agree, but I accepted his help. I
was still not wasted.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Next to us in the living room, Maria and two
of the guys were watching or in high school host
Club and Cowboy Bebop. We all stayed up until two
am building or watching anime, so it was like everyone
was in the room exactly.
Speaker 4 (06:00):
It's like this this is f would be so different
if it was just the two of them, But that
would be ever unacceptable immediately, because what are you doing?
Speaker 3 (06:08):
But for half of the trip, me and the girls
split off and did our own thing. We did not
stay with the group the entire trip because our intent
was to go piggyback a small girl's weekend while also
seeing the event. Now this is back to Op's original post,
so basically saying like they met up with a professor
and got to meet professor's fiance at the anime convention.
I trust my boyfriend, but what's what's happening? So Bob
(06:31):
and his group? This is the professor announced talking. Bob
and his group went to an anime convention. I and
my friend group also went because I was not aware
there was one near me until Bob mentioned it. My
friend group, I thought got along well with his friends
and it was a great first con experience. I and
a few of my friends express interests in future events.
(06:51):
I think she's hung up on this professor title ship,
but I was an instructor who students call professor. But
this was very clearly was a side gig. As I
had a career, I was never in any position to
power at the school. I was a contract employee used
to fill an open course section at an undesirable time.
For the majority of the time I knew Bob. We
were equals, were only one year apart in age, and
(07:12):
shared a similar hobby. I respect that they view my
actions unprofessionally. I did not view it at the time.
I was no longer an instructor and have not been
since I taught a four month course one day a week.
Speaker 4 (07:24):
Yeah, I mean, that's what I'm saying, dog.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Like I would not be friends with an eighteen to
twenty two year old I had nothing in common with.
And then the original ope, the girlfriend of this guy, Yeah,
talks about having the heart to heart andting boundaries and stuff,
and then op now that this professor says I did
not know it had crossed any of their boundaries at
the time until the phone call. I treated Bob the
same way I treat all of my friends, but I
(07:48):
do understand and respect that not everyone has the same
view of friendship. My friend group went through a period
where we would talk about going to do stuff and
then no one does any work to follow through the
event Linda and our friends were going to attend that
never happened is a good example. I didn't want lazy
friends being the reason why I did not experience things.
Bob did follow through on going to things. My husband's
(08:08):
concern was that it was a group of guys we
had not met yet in person, and we were all girls.
I told him that if I thought any of one
of them was giving off weird vibes, we would immediately
leave and get a hotel. As for the phone call,
he did call to tell me basically the same, and
my understanding was that we should talk less because she
does not like the closeness. At the time, we were
messaging every day, and I did make an attempt to
(08:30):
reduce the frequency to once a week and then ope.
The original ope basically was like well, but she was
still talking to him all the time. And ex Professor
says one thing left out is that during the phone
call between Bob and me, I asked Bob if his
girlfriend would want to ever talk or get to know me,
(08:51):
or if all three of us could hang out, and
he asked her, and she said she did not want
to do that, and she was uncomfortable at the thought
of meeting me.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Ooh, that feels like new information.
Speaker 4 (09:02):
That is new information.
Speaker 5 (09:04):
But I'm having trouble no one who's lying here, because
it is either the original poster or the professor. The
professor's doing a like this, dissecting paragraph by paragraph of
the play by play.
Speaker 4 (09:15):
You know, here's what I'm saying. Ki Kim Fine had
an interesting thought where it's like, it seems pretty suspicious
that she found this so quickly, especially considering how long
it probably would have taken her to write this right,
But regardless, I think I don't think. I think let's
drop that because it's really irrelevant. The point is is
that you're being like, oh, well, that's why the dinner
was weird, because I knew that she had said she
(09:36):
thought meeting me would be uncomfortable and weird. But we
already got from Op that Op's got anxiety. She doesn't
even want to go to the convention because she's got
social anxiety. So as this other person hearing that, and
now you're at dinner and here she is right in
front of you with her boyfriend. Do you really think
icing her out is the move Like that feels.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Like professor didn't ice the girlfriend out, and it was
like just like perceived icing because of social meid insight.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
The boyfriend literally had to be like, Hey, this is
my girlfriend, Like, I.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Think we might ask context on the girlfriend's side, so,
you know, or on the professor's side. So she said
she did not want to do that and she was
uncomfortable at the thought of meeting me. I did stop
messaging him frequently and only did so once a week
to ask how his job search was going and to
let him know the status of a big event in
my life. I thought that was what was requested, less interaction,
not no interaction. It is true, and if you're new here,
(10:27):
there are multiple parts of the story, so make sure
to follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or
wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, let's get back into
the story. So Maria and I. So Maria and the
ex professor went to this dinner because everyone from the
airbnb trip was going to be there. Linda did not go.
What is not mentioned is that Bob and the girlfriend
arrived forty minutes into eating. They arrived when I was
(10:49):
away from the table when I saw them. After I returned,
I nodded and said hi, not specifically at Bob or her.
I did not address the hide either specifically, because one
girlfriend does not like me and him talking, and I
didn't want to disrespect that by talking to Bob in
front of her, and too, she said she did not
want to talk to me or get to know me previously,
and I thought she still felt that way.
Speaker 4 (11:09):
All right, that's arriving forty minutes late to the dinner,
big deal. That's a big deal, and that informs it.
That's way different if it's everyone's getting to the table
and sitting down saying, hey, how are you what's going on?
Blah blah blah.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
I don't know. I kind of believe.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
I kind of believe the chat is split fifty to
fifty on whether they believe the professor or not.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
But I kind of that makes sense to me.
Speaker 4 (11:28):
I believe that I believe I believe both sides of this,
in that I believe that the boyfriend doesn't want it was,
has no intentions of hooking up. I believe that the
girlfriend was still uncomfortable at this dynamic that he has
with another woman. She knows nothing about. And I believe
that the professor was like, oh, is that the case. Okay,
then I'll try not to be weird. And then all
these things have happened that have just compounded, oh PE's
(11:50):
own insecurities, Yeah, into this thing that is bigger than
it actually was.
Speaker 5 (11:55):
I have a conspiracy theory.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Yeah, hit me with it.
Speaker 5 (11:58):
Oh how do you fix that professor's hot and the
girlfriend's jealous?
Speaker 4 (12:03):
That could be that simple. It could be that simple,
you know, I think, And it's look, we keep calling
her professor. She taught one class a week for four months.
That's sixteen times she was in a classroom like for
one reason for an hour, and she never did it again.
She's not a professor. She's an accountant that was teaching
accounting briefly at a school. Yeah, and did not establish
(12:25):
this connection with this guy.
Speaker 3 (12:26):
I think when the girlfriend heard professor, I think she
like just like pedestalized.
Speaker 4 (12:31):
Right, exactly her, because I was also, how is she
had twenty five year old professor's like she's not, she
just like was someone They were like, can you teach accounting?
We are low on staff, because that is the reality
of higher education.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
Yeah, but we got a little bit more to this story, actually,
like a good chunk.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
So I learned.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Bob and his girlfriend thought I only said hey to Bob,
but I didn't direct it to anyone, and I was
trying to play it safe.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
At that point.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
I knew she had social anxiety and it was against
meeting with me to get to know me previously, so
I thought I was respecting her boundary by not talking
to her. Howd I know when she came to personally
meet me, I would have tried to talk to her.
After learning why she came, I was surprised she did
not try to start a conversation with me or Maria.
As for the booze, except for them, since they arrived late,
everyone had two to three drinks already because it was
(13:12):
a happy hour.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Marie and I.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
Made friends with the bartender who gave us discounted cocktails.
I ended up buying a drink for girlfriend, so she
should get the discount and then pay me back. It
is true I said those jokes, but I was not
the one to bring them up. They were said in jest.
These were jokes already made in previous interactions. Later that week,
Maria called me to catch up and mentioned the dinner.
She commented that girlfriend made no effort to get to
(13:35):
know us, and thought girlfriend went to monitor him and me.
In essence, she ignored me and Maria and Maria and
I ignored her. I did not go to the show
because I had a prior commitment. And then related to
the comments of like, oh, she's crossing major boundaries this
professor and she wants to have a spicy sleep. The
professor responds, as mentioned in her post, I did view
Bob as a brother.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
Now that's also a little funny to me, because how
can you go from like, oh, he was just a
student in my class and I didn't really like have
a crazy bond with him, and he like gave me
that gift at the end, and I went, oh, maybe
he is cool. Now he's at brother status.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
I think you could be come.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
I mean, think about fraternity brothers one Hayes and you're
my brother.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
I don't know, man, I never did that. I was
never in it, And honestly, I think maybe that's being
thrown around a little callously.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I'm I'm still tight with my fraternity brothers in my
entrepreneurship fraternity. But Isham was my d that's my that's
a brother. That's a brother.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
That's a brother.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
He was my brother day one, four months once a
brother day one though, that's day one, but the one brother.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
But this isn't they did, but they weren't in a frat, guys,
this is not that's not anime cons I think maybe
they did say something that I mean, she was shy.
I think maybe they had like one like cornerstone conversation
that went, oh, we are actually cool. We're cool with
each other, we're friends.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
But that's a cool thing. I do agree with you.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
I mean, I think it is a bit fast to
do to get to brother, but I do think those
things could happen quickly. Let us know if like brother
is a is a red flag.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
I think Tobe says, say, that's trauma bonding.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Yes, it is, it is. That's it's the best kind
of bonding. Right. He lived similar experiences to me, But
I felt like he was where I would have been
had I not moved out from my parents when I did.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
Yeah, your boyfriend is where I would have been if
I totally fed up.
Speaker 4 (15:27):
Yeah, if I hadn't grown and changed and become a
better person than he'd be who I was.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
I wanted to see him professionally thrive and accomplish his
goals of getting a car and moving out, as those
were things I strived for and had already attained. As
for the five to six times we met up, it
was in group settings and he met all my friends
and my husband as well. This post to me makes
it seem like I was always hanging on to Bob,
but there were many instances of me and my friends
breaking off to do our own thing. My husband and
(15:54):
Linda's husband were both okay with us going to the
Airbnb at the time, and later on met and got
to know Bob too. Each time we met, if I drank,
I had two drinks and one time I had three.
I am not sure how Bob told these events to
his girlfriend, so it may just be lost in translation.
But the only person who ever got wasted at a
(16:14):
meetup was Maria, and it was once. I do not
agree with her stating that it was constantly wasted for
each meet up or always asking the slash inviting myself
to things. He invited me and Linda to join his
Airbnb group. I asked that Maria could also join. I
did ask to join his group for another event until
my friend group arrived, which included my husband, Linda and
Maria and his friend invited me to the group dinner.
Maria and attended. There's another relevant update. Hey, it's sam
(16:37):
og host. We're going to get back to these delectable stories.
But here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors to
help support the show.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
We got. We got a little bit more.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
But I feel like ex professor to me didn't cross
as many boundaries as I initially thought. And I, you know,
I feel like it might be more or less okay,
but I think so too.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
But what I feel like you could you could play
the other side a little.
Speaker 4 (17:00):
But it's the thing is is once your a partner
comes to you and goes, hey, this makes me uncomfortable, change,
that's when you change it. And that's exactly what they did. Yeah,
so everything that's happens to our on the story I
think is totally above board. Yeah, there was a comment
that was just up there. Oh. Tila Angels says, it
sounds like a territorial thing between females. It happens all
the time. Opie felt like she was being disrespected and
the professor felt like she had some kind of instant
(17:20):
connection and wanted to deepen that connection without considering Ope.
Speaker 3 (17:23):
Yeah, I mean and your friendship like isn't necessarily romantic.
Speaker 4 (17:29):
Two people of the opposite sex who are deeply like
committed to another relationship like can like there you can't
be friends. Yeah, they were not going to this the
AIRBB thing alone. I think there's like, you know, there's
clearly miscues or miscommunications about like who said what or
who offered what. But I think at the end of
the day, this is more of an issue on like
respecting our partner's feelings yeah, which we did, Yeah, because
(17:50):
there was that effort made. And I think it.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
Could also be about this focus on the waste, the wastedness.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
I think it's a case of if you look for something,
you might see it. You know, if you're looking for like, oh,
well she was, like you're looking for reasons why maybe
this could be wrong or bad or inappropriate. It's like, yeah,
she was drinking, she was too drunk, like but you know, and.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
That's you know, she's like saying, no, I had two
to three drinks, and.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
It's neither here nor there really because I mean, you
weren't there, op wasn't there that says, So it's from
a you know, third third hand, second hand knowledge, I think.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
But what I'm seeing right now, as I'm saying, I'm
seeing a decent amount of platonicness. Yeah, I feel like this,
this could be platonic. But I also do see in
the chat, like, you know, people being like maybe maybe
she was still trying trying to make moves. But the
more I read this, the more I'm like, you know,
what do you think, Riley?
Speaker 5 (18:41):
I think it's platonic on her end.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
Oh you're switching, so you think you think it's platonic
on her end, but not platonic on his.
Speaker 4 (18:48):
Yeah, there is a conspiracy cooking that Bob might be
playing the two ladies against each other, but.
Speaker 5 (18:55):
Probably because who's the mineral? Who is the middle man here?
Speaker 2 (18:58):
He's the middle man, He's a man in the middle,
he's the meet in the middle.
Speaker 5 (19:01):
I just think, I don't know, I don't like it
because the girlfriend maybe given him eighty percent, but the
professor's given that twenty percent of those cool anime expos
and go to all those cool events he has always
wanted to go to.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
He's kind of windows shopping a little bit. She might
have also been more drunk than she thought she was.
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Oh yeah, like two to three drinks looks a lot
different on like me versus you know, like yeah then
Sofia or like you know, like a five foot flat lady,
which you know.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
There was also another comment I can't remember who made
it about how I consider Sophia's sister and how it's
like I can't have it both ways. It is different.
Me and Sofia work together five days a week for
ten months, like we'd close. This was like a acquaintance ship, yeah,
between the two of them that I guess at some
point it was like she imprinted her own stuff onto
(19:55):
this guy, being like, oh we had similar situations. I
kind of almost like it almost kind of felt like
he was talking like a baby bird, like under my
like I brought him under my wing.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Yeah yeah, but I think I think that's what she
thinks of him as a little brother. Yeah, I think
that's what she thinks of him as ming ming Is
wants us to talk about how op absolutely is just.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
Throwing Maria under the bus and that's pretty funny.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
It's like I wasn't I wouldn't completely hammered, but Maria, who.
Speaker 4 (20:21):
Yeah, Gota got after it?
Speaker 2 (20:24):
Yeah, what's the song? How do you solve a problem
with movie?
Speaker 4 (20:29):
I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
You don't know that song, Noper what no one knows
that song?
Speaker 4 (20:34):
Come on, who knows that song?
Speaker 2 (20:35):
On bus? That's what you do with Maria. But we
got we got more to this story.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
We also there was a a Nissa Julia had a
comment that I wanted to read really quick, And Nissa
Julia says, Sam, a month ago you called out my relationship,
saying that it was other problems with us, and now
he's my ex. Thank you so much, Sam, I'm glad
you uh dropped some dead weight doing work, doing the work,
doing the work, the man of the people, man of
the people, the people's champ. I appreciate you know what.
(21:03):
This is a new chapter for you, so get excited.
Speaker 4 (21:05):
Congratulations.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
To this day, his girlfriend has never said a word
to me or Maria. She did not say hi, only
wave to us, nor us to her when I offered
order and bring her a cocktail from the bar. I
believe Bob was the only one who responded to my offer.
I haven't found out about what she was thinking via
this best rhetter updates post Linda, Marie, and I haven't
talked to Bob since this was a cathartic RTE with Maria,
(21:28):
as it is very jarring. Randomly fine a post about
yourself and then also have someone find you from that post,
and we got some relevant comments. Commenter says there are
always two sides of these stories, the jealouz significant other
and the other person I hope. He responds, I think
it was just bad communication, but it seems that I
was expected to somehow know she came to the final
dinner to get to know me, but all I knew
was that one she re directed getting to know me
(21:50):
in the past, citing she was uncomfortable, and two she
did not try to talk to me or my friend
at the dinner for the entire three hours we were
all present together. And another commeder says, person, I drop
all communication with him and forget both of them even exists,
not worth the trouble they bring to your life, and
hope He responds that is what ended up happening. Bob
was angry that ignored his girlfriend at the dinner, but
(22:11):
I thought it was an unspoken agreement to mutually ignore
each other to avoid any awkward, dude.
Speaker 4 (22:16):
No way you believe that. I'm sorry, no one has
ever believed that ignoring someone sitting right in front of
you like they don't exist is less awkward than making
polite conversation.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
That's completely agree.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
I'm calling you out for that. That's completely agree. I
do completely agree you just you should have just been kind. Yeah,
and feel I feel it is always more awkward to
ignore a person. Yeah, always come on, And that's almost
even that's what they want. Now, I'm like, you're playing
the game. You're like, fine, if she wants to just
like not talk to me, or if she's uncomfortable with
me talking to that, and I guess I won't.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
That is such a good point even, like, but she
could have thought that's what she wanted.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
But come on, you're a human being. Yeah, you're you're
a human.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Let us not I know. Now, let us know if
you agree or disagree.
Speaker 4 (22:58):
I guess if you're on a SAE, it's actually you
can be you know, there's a lack of social cues because.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
She could be did have social anxiety. But let us
know what you think. So a commenter says, for me,
it was Bob agreeing that you were being inappropriate to
the point that he called you and directly asked you
to limit your contact with him. You then rudely don't
say hi to either of them at a dinner when
everyone else does, until he decided to tease Bob about
the period you were his teacher. I'm not shocked the
girlfriend and Bob were so uncomfortable with this interaction, Op responded,
(23:29):
sure that his fair assessment. I said hi to both
them in their direction because I did not want to
address either one individually, just in case it made them uncomfortable.
I left the table to go to the bathroom, and
when I came back, they were there. Hindsight is twenty twenty,
and I can say that I should have talked to them,
since it is now clear she attended the dinner to
meet me. I had thought not talk to them after
Bob asked me to limit contact with him, and not
talking to his girlfriend was respecting their boundary. I'm going
(23:51):
to update my posts, though, to note that I did
not initiate those jokes. I feel like like going back
to what Dakota said. I remember just slight okay storytime
where there's a little bit more to the story, but
slight okay, storytime, one of my roommates said I gotta
go to Puerto Rico and then just left for a
month and left us with this random roommate like that
(24:11):
he found on Facebook marketplace. Like within three days she
came in and was the weirdest person ever. Said she
was allergic to the sun and only went out at night,
like like and like she was literally a vampire. She
would this was like a couple days in a row.
She would Christian and I were sleeping in the same
room because we used to share a room together, and
(24:33):
she would stand in the doorway and go Christian Sam,
Christian Sam, Christian Sam, Christian Sam, until we woke up
and and were like what is it? And she's like,
I'm home and then would like giggle and run off
back to her room. It was and there was like
a whole host of other things. But basically after she
did that a couple of times I was like, hey,
(24:54):
like you really like like you can't like creepily yell
at our names in the mi the night, like we
need some space, right Like I feel like I need
some space.
Speaker 4 (25:04):
I'm glad you survived.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
What she did after that is anytime I entered the
kitchen with her or any room, she would drop everything
on the floor and go put her face in a corner,
and I feel like this is a little bit what
the professor is doing kind of it's like, oh, you
want to get space, let me go like in the
corner real quick, is there anything?
Speaker 5 (25:26):
What are the other little things she would do?
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Oh dude, there was so much.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
She said she got abducted by a cult and like
Christian had to save her. Like she gave us like
a bunch of cookies like months after it, like it
was like you did not eat those We did not
eat those cookies. She knocked on the door and started
bang on the door and she's like, I brought your cookies.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
Like it was like I just think she was very
you know, socially.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
Also, she would she got a record player and got
the Looney Tunes version of what the When You're Jet
You're a West Side story?
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Put it on blast and like this was the.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Day after I said I need some space, and was
a great regressively cooking eggs.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
To the point where the eggs were.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
Splattering all over and was banging the pots like like
I put it down, and I'm like, hey, like, is
everything okay?
Speaker 2 (26:09):
And that's when she went into the corner and like, yeah.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
It was you just had a deeply disturbed random roommate.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
Yeah, and she was like thirty fove too. To add
more context, Yeah, and I think.
Speaker 4 (26:21):
She fell in love with the wildest thing you could
have ever added to that that she's thirty five.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
She's thirty five, and she fell in love with Christian.
Speaker 3 (26:27):
Was literally texting Christian every day, like literally every like
Christian has had this happen so many times, it's gotten worse.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
I am off topic. I need to go back to
the store.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
This is beautiful A little bit. I would say that
the professor is giving like two percent of that energy.
But it's there. It's there, undeniably. Yeah, it's lurking.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
It's a little there.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
But I'm going to update my post though, to note
that I did not initiate those jokes. A guy at
the table mentioned it first, and I confirmed slash ribbed
his bit. Commentary May asked your age and how long
you've been married. Do you think the drinks embolded you
to engage the other person's ribbing of Bob after you
blatantly ignored him, or was it your turn to talk
to Bob after he asked you to chill. Opie says,
not sure why you are downvoted, but we were twenty
(27:14):
six at the time and I was engaged. Then I
referred to my husband as such because it seemed natural.
Like I explained in a separate comment, Bob and his
girlfriend did not talk to me or Maria, and we
did not talk to them either.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
His girlfriend stayed.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
By his side the entire time, and I wasn't about
to walk up to both of them and try to
have a friendly conversation after knowing they were both uncomfortable
with me. Thought it was a mutual, unspoken ignoring of
each other. They seem to have a good time, and
me and Maria had a good time. I didn't know
that they were offended. I didn't talk to them until
after I found the original Reddit post as for engaging
in the ribbing, that was the vibe in the entire night.
(27:46):
There's a good time with friends, sometimes poking fun at
each other, but not seriously. Even at that point, I
still did not directly talk to Bob. I just acknowledged
the joke gesture towards Bob as I was speaking, and
confirmed the joke a different person at the table made
and that was it, and that is where this story ends.
Speaker 4 (28:04):
I think there's no universe in which if she did
have a little crush on Bob, she's gonna go I mean, yeah,
I had a little crush on Bob, but I wasn't
gonna be weird about it. Yeah, it would make a
lot of sense that she goes, hey, look everything is
above board blah blah blah blah blah, but barring some
sort of like you know, it is some kind of it.
Because people on the spectrum it's like if you have
(28:25):
add or it's like you've autism. It's like sometimes you
can like lose you're not really aware of like your
social cues or like proper social like procedures. So it
could make sense like if someone tells you, oh, like
if you find out, oh, this person doesn't want to
know me or get to know me or talk to
me at all, maybe you would kind of hyper zoom
in on that and be like, well, then now I'm
gonna actually ignore them, even though they're sitting across the
table from me, And like it could be coming from
(28:47):
a misguided place. I'm more suspicious that it's coming from
that two percent milk version of You're crazy insane Room.
Speaker 3 (28:54):
Yeah, Facebook, Yeah, I feel like it's giving a little
bit of that energy. But you know, at the end
of the day, I feel like it seems like everything
was above board. It seems like it was just a miscommunication.
I don't think there was any spicy sleep, but I
would love to know from you guys what you think
is this relationship above board?
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Is it not? How do you think it's spiraled?
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Let us known the comments, But with that, that's the
end of this episode. So if you love us, make
sure to subscribe We Love you, and see it tomorrow.
Hey, this is Sam, this is John. We're the ancient
two case storytime podcast hosts, and we have some ancient
wisdom in the stories coming up.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
If you want to.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Hear the wisdom from two old heads that know more
than they know what to do with, you're gonna have
to wait for a quick message from our sponsors for
the next two minutes or so.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
So this is part four. But last we left off.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
In this series, we found out about Ope's heart to
heart with their boyfriend. According to her, he agreed to
set some boundaries in place with his ex professor, especially
as their decision to share in Airbnb made both their
partners uncomfortable. However, Opie's boyfriend still insists that Opi and
his ex professor are going to meet to get to
know each other. Will this dinner party crash and burn?
(00:40):
Let's find out. So this is the professor's side, hy
ya yi, Why am I twenty five female always portrayed
as wasted? Maria twenty five female was wasted? Editors not
says there has been some confusion. Maria and Linda are
professor's friends. Maria is the one who can corroborate everything.
(01:01):
I twenty five female and the aforementioned professor and the
best of writer to post about me related to posts
and the subreddit. I decided to post a response after
this event was brought up again with a mutual Maria
twenty five female for both hanging out as I type.
Speaker 4 (01:14):
This, and I think, Okay, maybe the reason she is
replying to this like this is because again she's not
really a professor. Her full time job as an accountant.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
So she does.
Speaker 4 (01:21):
I don't even know if it's like, oh, I might
be losing my job like you're not. Maybe you're your adjuncte.
You know, you're a full time something else.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
She's just in it for the tea.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
She and I have both hung out with boyfriend Bob
in group settings and think there are definitely two sides
of the story. My main gripe is being portrayed as
a wasted man stealer. Below is the original post I
found while browsing Day one. Also, someone did find me
after reading this post due to how specific it is.
I'm responding paragraph by paragraph, so you do not need
(01:52):
to read the original post. Feel free too. So I
was his instructor for one class flash semester that boyfriend
Bob attended. I have no say or sway at the
school and have not taught since then. I taught a
class related to my profession. I did not get to
know Bob personally until after the class was over. On
the last day, he expressed that I was a great
instructor and gave me a miniature he built as a
(02:14):
show of gratitude. I also made miniatures a different type, though,
and it was intrigued that someone else was into this hobby.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
And we stayed in toime.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Nah, this guy knew that you did that before he
gave you that. Right, there's no way.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Maybe, but yeah, maybe maybe she talked about it in class,
but I think it still could have been, like, you know,
like a apple at the end of a.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
I'm immediately suspicious of the way she's framing this because
it sounds like, well, the first he made the first move,
and it's like.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
I don't think I'm asicious.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
I feel like, like that move alone, Like I've given
nice little things to professors, not as much as I should.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I should give more apples to professors.
Speaker 4 (02:50):
Are they apples? Though?
Speaker 2 (02:51):
The nice little things?
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Thice? Little things, little little.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Little things, Yeah, just a little little things.
Speaker 4 (02:58):
A little appreciation, a little.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
Later, I invited a few students for a meal, girls
and guys, and the boys students were the only ones
who are svp'ed.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Yes, Bob did.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
Mention an event I did not invite myself. I said
me and my friend Linda were interested in may Goo too.
Later on, Bob invited me to join their group's airbnb
because I was looking at hotels. A previous event trip
fell through for mine Linda's friend group, and I felt
bad she couldn't go on a trip in the USA
before she had to go back to her home country.
This trip was to replace that experience, and Bob invited
(03:31):
us to the airbnb, and Linda and I shared a
room with two beds, so they had separate beds and everything.
Speaker 4 (03:35):
What do you think I mean, that's that's fine.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Maria ended up coming on this trip as well, which
the group was also okay with, and stayed in the
same room with me and Linda, respectfully. I had one
cocktail and then his friend bought everyone a shot. That
was the extent of my drinking. I wasn't wasted, Linda
wasn't wasted, and no one else in the group ended
up being wasted. Maria was, though Maria underestimated how strong
the drinks were, and she was the DD and did
(04:00):
not have enough time to sober up once she felt
the booze hitter.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
You couldn't drive.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
I didn't want to drive her dad's car and Linda
doesn't have a US driver's license. Bob offered to drive
the car with me, Linda, and Maria back to the airbnb.
The other car was driven back by his friend, who
was not wasted and drove sober. At the Airbnb, Bob
asked what I would do with a model kid I won.
I said, I'm not familiar with that type of miniature,
so I would sell it on Facebook marketplace. He said
(04:26):
it was actually easy to build, he had built one before,
and he can help me build it right then, as
all their tools for building were still out on the table.
I said he didn't have to, but he insisted and
I accepted his help. I was also still not wasted.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
And we've already established building the thing is way less
susce than not building the whole thing.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
I think there was a full model at the end
of this income.
Speaker 4 (04:48):
Yeah, it was like a let's appreciate this thing. Oh,
you don't think you can do something I bet you can,
because this is cool and it can be overwhelming to
build some of those things there. The instructions can be
unclear and difficult tedious.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
So far, though Chat is saying she's lying with seven votes,
I mean, I don't know. I don't think necessarily she is.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
This sounds like exactly what happened, because the boyfriend is like,
all right, well, after y'all had a heart to heart,
all of this comes down to, is the boyfriend to
be trusted in this relationship and everything it is telling me?
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Yes, yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
I think if boyfriend picked up the sense that there
was some level of infatuation or you know.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
I think as soon as he did he like put
that boundary.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Lost coming his way, he'd be like, Hey, let's not
hang out with her anymore. That's freaky, right. Why would
we want to do that? We want to hang out
with the home wrecker who wants to ruin her engagement
and also mess with mine? Like what are we doing?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
I agree? I agree, but I accepted his help. I
was still not wasted.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Next to us in the living room, Maria and two
of the guys were watching or in high school host
Club and Cowboy Bebop. We all stayed up until two
am building or watching anime, so it was like everyone
was in the room exactly.
Speaker 4 (06:00):
It's like this this is f would be so different
if it was just the two of them, But that
would be ever unacceptable immediately, because what are you doing?
Speaker 3 (06:08):
But for half of the trip, me and the girls
split off and did our own thing. We did not
stay with the group the entire trip because our intent
was to go piggyback a small girl's weekend while also
seeing the event. Now this is back to Op's original post,
so basically saying like they met up with a professor
and got to meet professor's fiance at the anime convention.
I trust my boyfriend, but what's what's happening? So Bob
(06:31):
and his group? This is the professor announced talking. Bob
and his group went to an anime convention. I and
my friend group also went because I was not aware
there was one near me until Bob mentioned it. My
friend group, I thought got along well with his friends
and it was a great first con experience. I and
a few of my friends express interests in future events.
(06:51):
I think she's hung up on this professor title ship,
but I was an instructor who students call professor. But
this was very clearly was a side gig. As I
had a career, I was never in any position to
power at the school. I was a contract employee used
to fill an open course section at an undesirable time.
For the majority of the time I knew Bob. We
were equals, were only one year apart in age, and
(07:12):
shared a similar hobby. I respect that they view my
actions unprofessionally. I did not view it at the time.
I was no longer an instructor and have not been
since I taught a four month course one day a week.
Speaker 4 (07:24):
Yeah, I mean, that's what I'm saying, dog.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Like I would not be friends with an eighteen to
twenty two year old I had nothing in common with.
And then the original ope, the girlfriend of this guy, Yeah,
talks about having the heart to heart andting boundaries and stuff,
and then op now that this professor says I did
not know it had crossed any of their boundaries at
the time until the phone call. I treated Bob the
same way I treat all of my friends, but I
(07:48):
do understand and respect that not everyone has the same
view of friendship. My friend group went through a period
where we would talk about going to do stuff and
then no one does any work to follow through the
event Linda and our friends were going to attend that
never happened is a good example. I didn't want lazy
friends being the reason why I did not experience things.
Bob did follow through on going to things. My husband's
(08:08):
concern was that it was a group of guys we
had not met yet in person, and we were all girls.
I told him that if I thought any of one
of them was giving off weird vibes, we would immediately
leave and get a hotel. As for the phone call,
he did call to tell me basically the same, and
my understanding was that we should talk less because she
does not like the closeness. At the time, we were
messaging every day, and I did make an attempt to
(08:30):
reduce the frequency to once a week and then ope.
The original ope basically was like well, but she was
still talking to him all the time. And ex Professor
says one thing left out is that during the phone
call between Bob and me, I asked Bob if his
girlfriend would want to ever talk or get to know me,
(08:51):
or if all three of us could hang out, and
he asked her, and she said she did not want
to do that, and she was uncomfortable at the thought
of meeting me.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Ooh, that feels like new information.
Speaker 4 (09:02):
That is new information.
Speaker 5 (09:04):
But I'm having trouble no one who's lying here, because
it is either the original poster or the professor. The
professor's doing a like this, dissecting paragraph by paragraph of
the play by play.
Speaker 4 (09:15):
You know, here's what I'm saying. Ki Kim Fine had
an interesting thought where it's like, it seems pretty suspicious
that she found this so quickly, especially considering how long
it probably would have taken her to write this right,
But regardless, I think I don't think. I think let's
drop that because it's really irrelevant. The point is is
that you're being like, oh, well, that's why the dinner
was weird, because I knew that she had said she
(09:36):
thought meeting me would be uncomfortable and weird. But we
already got from Op that Op's got anxiety. She doesn't
even want to go to the convention because she's got
social anxiety. So as this other person hearing that, and
now you're at dinner and here she is right in
front of you with her boyfriend. Do you really think
icing her out is the move Like that feels.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Like professor didn't ice the girlfriend out, and it was
like just like perceived icing because of social meid insight.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
The boyfriend literally had to be like, Hey, this is
my girlfriend, Like, I.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Think we might ask context on the girlfriend's side, so,
you know, or on the professor's side. So she said
she did not want to do that and she was
uncomfortable at the thought of meeting me. I did stop
messaging him frequently and only did so once a week
to ask how his job search was going and to
let him know the status of a big event in
my life. I thought that was what was requested, less interaction,
not no interaction. It is true, and if you're new here,
(10:27):
there are multiple parts of the story, so make sure
to follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or
wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, let's get back into
the story. So Maria and I. So Maria and the
ex professor went to this dinner because everyone from the
airbnb trip was going to be there. Linda did not go.
What is not mentioned is that Bob and the girlfriend
arrived forty minutes into eating. They arrived when I was
(10:49):
away from the table when I saw them. After I returned,
I nodded and said hi, not specifically at Bob or her.
I did not address the hide either specifically, because one
girlfriend does not like me and him talking, and I
didn't want to disrespect that by talking to Bob in
front of her, and too, she said she did not
want to talk to me or get to know me previously,
and I thought she still felt that way.
Speaker 4 (11:09):
All right, that's arriving forty minutes late to the dinner,
big deal. That's a big deal, and that informs it.
That's way different if it's everyone's getting to the table
and sitting down saying, hey, how are you what's going on?
Blah blah blah.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
I don't know. I kind of believe.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
I kind of believe the chat is split fifty to
fifty on whether they believe the professor or not.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
But I kind of that makes sense to me.
Speaker 4 (11:28):
I believe that I believe I believe both sides of this,
in that I believe that the boyfriend doesn't want it was,
has no intentions of hooking up. I believe that the
girlfriend was still uncomfortable at this dynamic that he has
with another woman. She knows nothing about. And I believe
that the professor was like, oh, is that the case. Okay,
then I'll try not to be weird. And then all
these things have happened that have just compounded, oh PE's
(11:50):
own insecurities, Yeah, into this thing that is bigger than
it actually was.
Speaker 5 (11:55):
I have a conspiracy theory.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Yeah, hit me with it.
Speaker 5 (11:58):
Oh how do you fix that professor's hot and the
girlfriend's jealous?
Speaker 4 (12:03):
That could be that simple. It could be that simple,
you know, I think, And it's look, we keep calling
her professor. She taught one class a week for four months.
That's sixteen times she was in a classroom like for
one reason for an hour, and she never did it again.
She's not a professor. She's an accountant that was teaching
accounting briefly at a school. Yeah, and did not establish
(12:25):
this connection with this guy.
Speaker 3 (12:26):
I think when the girlfriend heard professor, I think she
like just like pedestalized.
Speaker 4 (12:31):
Right, exactly her, because I was also, how is she
had twenty five year old professor's like she's not, she
just like was someone They were like, can you teach accounting?
We are low on staff, because that is the reality
of higher education.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
Yeah, but we got a little bit more to this story, actually,
like a good chunk.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
So I learned.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Bob and his girlfriend thought I only said hey to Bob,
but I didn't direct it to anyone, and I was
trying to play it safe.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
At that point.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
I knew she had social anxiety and it was against
meeting with me to get to know me previously, so
I thought I was respecting her boundary by not talking
to her. Howd I know when she came to personally
meet me, I would have tried to talk to her.
After learning why she came, I was surprised she did
not try to start a conversation with me or Maria.
As for the booze, except for them, since they arrived late,
everyone had two to three drinks already because it was
(13:12):
a happy hour.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Marie and I.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
Made friends with the bartender who gave us discounted cocktails.
I ended up buying a drink for girlfriend, so she
should get the discount and then pay me back. It
is true I said those jokes, but I was not
the one to bring them up. They were said in jest.
These were jokes already made in previous interactions. Later that week,
Maria called me to catch up and mentioned the dinner.
She commented that girlfriend made no effort to get to
(13:35):
know us, and thought girlfriend went to monitor him and me.
In essence, she ignored me and Maria and Maria and
I ignored her. I did not go to the show
because I had a prior commitment. And then related to
the comments of like, oh, she's crossing major boundaries this
professor and she wants to have a spicy sleep. The
professor responds, as mentioned in her post, I did view
Bob as a brother.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
Now that's also a little funny to me, because how
can you go from like, oh, he was just a
student in my class and I didn't really like have
a crazy bond with him, and he like gave me
that gift at the end, and I went, oh, maybe
he is cool. Now he's at brother status.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
I think you could be come.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
I mean, think about fraternity brothers one Hayes and you're
my brother.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
I don't know, man, I never did that. I was
never in it, And honestly, I think maybe that's being
thrown around a little callously.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I'm I'm still tight with my fraternity brothers in my
entrepreneurship fraternity. But Isham was my d that's my that's
a brother. That's a brother.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
That's a brother.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
He was my brother day one, four months once a
brother day one though, that's day one, but the one brother.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
But this isn't they did, but they weren't in a frat, guys,
this is not that's not anime cons I think maybe
they did say something that I mean, she was shy.
I think maybe they had like one like cornerstone conversation
that went, oh, we are actually cool. We're cool with
each other, we're friends.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
But that's a cool thing. I do agree with you.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
I mean, I think it is a bit fast to
do to get to brother, but I do think those
things could happen quickly. Let us know if like brother
is a is a red flag.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
I think Tobe says, say, that's trauma bonding.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Yes, it is, it is. That's it's the best kind
of bonding. Right. He lived similar experiences to me, But
I felt like he was where I would have been
had I not moved out from my parents when I did.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
Yeah, your boyfriend is where I would have been if
I totally fed up.
Speaker 4 (15:27):
Yeah, if I hadn't grown and changed and become a
better person than he'd be who I was.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
I wanted to see him professionally thrive and accomplish his
goals of getting a car and moving out, as those
were things I strived for and had already attained. As
for the five to six times we met up, it
was in group settings and he met all my friends
and my husband as well. This post to me makes
it seem like I was always hanging on to Bob,
but there were many instances of me and my friends
breaking off to do our own thing. My husband and
(15:54):
Linda's husband were both okay with us going to the
Airbnb at the time, and later on met and got
to know Bob too. Each time we met, if I drank,
I had two drinks and one time I had three.
I am not sure how Bob told these events to
his girlfriend, so it may just be lost in translation.
But the only person who ever got wasted at a
(16:14):
meetup was Maria, and it was once. I do not
agree with her stating that it was constantly wasted for
each meet up or always asking the slash inviting myself
to things. He invited me and Linda to join his
Airbnb group. I asked that Maria could also join. I
did ask to join his group for another event until
my friend group arrived, which included my husband, Linda and
Maria and his friend invited me to the group dinner.
Maria and attended. There's another relevant update. Hey, it's sam
(16:37):
og host. We're going to get back to these delectable stories.
But here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors to
help support the show.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
We got. We got a little bit more.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
But I feel like ex professor to me didn't cross
as many boundaries as I initially thought. And I, you know,
I feel like it might be more or less okay,
but I think so too.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
But what I feel like you could you could play
the other side a little.
Speaker 4 (17:00):
But it's the thing is is once your a partner
comes to you and goes, hey, this makes me uncomfortable, change,
that's when you change it. And that's exactly what they did. Yeah,
so everything that's happens to our on the story I
think is totally above board. Yeah, there was a comment
that was just up there. Oh. Tila Angels says, it
sounds like a territorial thing between females. It happens all
the time. Opie felt like she was being disrespected and
the professor felt like she had some kind of instant
(17:20):
connection and wanted to deepen that connection without considering Ope.
Speaker 3 (17:23):
Yeah, I mean and your friendship like isn't necessarily romantic.
Speaker 4 (17:29):
Two people of the opposite sex who are deeply like
committed to another relationship like can like there you can't
be friends. Yeah, they were not going to this the
AIRBB thing alone. I think there's like, you know, there's
clearly miscues or miscommunications about like who said what or
who offered what. But I think at the end of
the day, this is more of an issue on like
respecting our partner's feelings yeah, which we did, Yeah, because
(17:50):
there was that effort made. And I think it.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
Could also be about this focus on the waste, the wastedness.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
I think it's a case of if you look for something,
you might see it. You know, if you're looking for like, oh,
well she was, like you're looking for reasons why maybe
this could be wrong or bad or inappropriate. It's like, yeah,
she was drinking, she was too drunk, like but you know, and.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
That's you know, she's like saying, no, I had two
to three drinks, and.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
It's neither here nor there really because I mean, you
weren't there, op wasn't there that says, So it's from
a you know, third third hand, second hand knowledge, I think.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
But what I'm seeing right now, as I'm saying, I'm
seeing a decent amount of platonicness. Yeah, I feel like this,
this could be platonic. But I also do see in
the chat, like, you know, people being like maybe maybe
she was still trying trying to make moves. But the
more I read this, the more I'm like, you know,
what do you think, Riley?
Speaker 5 (18:41):
I think it's platonic on her end.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
Oh you're switching, so you think you think it's platonic
on her end, but not platonic on his.
Speaker 4 (18:48):
Yeah, there is a conspiracy cooking that Bob might be
playing the two ladies against each other, but.
Speaker 5 (18:55):
Probably because who's the mineral? Who is the middle man here?
Speaker 2 (18:58):
He's the middle man, He's a man in the middle,
he's the meet in the middle.
Speaker 5 (19:01):
I just think, I don't know, I don't like it
because the girlfriend maybe given him eighty percent, but the
professor's given that twenty percent of those cool anime expos
and go to all those cool events he has always
wanted to go to.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
He's kind of windows shopping a little bit. She might
have also been more drunk than she thought she was.
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Oh yeah, like two to three drinks looks a lot
different on like me versus you know, like yeah then
Sofia or like you know, like a five foot flat lady,
which you know.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
There was also another comment I can't remember who made
it about how I consider Sophia's sister and how it's
like I can't have it both ways. It is different.
Me and Sofia work together five days a week for
ten months, like we'd close. This was like a acquaintance ship, yeah,
between the two of them that I guess at some
point it was like she imprinted her own stuff onto
(19:55):
this guy, being like, oh we had similar situations. I
kind of almost like it almost kind of felt like
he was talking like a baby bird, like under my
like I brought him under my wing.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Yeah yeah, but I think I think that's what she
thinks of him as a little brother. Yeah, I think
that's what she thinks of him as ming ming Is
wants us to talk about how op absolutely is just.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
Throwing Maria under the bus and that's pretty funny.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
It's like I wasn't I wouldn't completely hammered, but Maria, who.
Speaker 4 (20:21):
Yeah, Gota got after it?
Speaker 2 (20:24):
Yeah, what's the song? How do you solve a problem
with movie?
Speaker 4 (20:29):
I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
You don't know that song, Noper what no one knows
that song?
Speaker 4 (20:34):
Come on, who knows that song?
Speaker 2 (20:35):
On bus? That's what you do with Maria. But we
got we got more to this story.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
We also there was a a Nissa Julia had a
comment that I wanted to read really quick, And Nissa
Julia says, Sam, a month ago you called out my relationship,
saying that it was other problems with us, and now
he's my ex. Thank you so much, Sam, I'm glad
you uh dropped some dead weight doing work, doing the work,
doing the work, the man of the people, man of
the people, the people's champ. I appreciate you know what.
(21:03):
This is a new chapter for you, so get excited.
Speaker 4 (21:05):
Congratulations.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
To this day, his girlfriend has never said a word
to me or Maria. She did not say hi, only
wave to us, nor us to her when I offered
order and bring her a cocktail from the bar. I
believe Bob was the only one who responded to my offer.
I haven't found out about what she was thinking via
this best rhetter updates post Linda, Marie, and I haven't
talked to Bob since this was a cathartic RTE with Maria,
(21:28):
as it is very jarring. Randomly fine a post about
yourself and then also have someone find you from that post,
and we got some relevant comments. Commenter says there are
always two sides of these stories, the jealouz significant other
and the other person I hope. He responds, I think
it was just bad communication, but it seems that I
was expected to somehow know she came to the final
dinner to get to know me, but all I knew
was that one she re directed getting to know me
(21:50):
in the past, citing she was uncomfortable, and two she
did not try to talk to me or my friend
at the dinner for the entire three hours we were
all present together. And another commeder says, person, I drop
all communication with him and forget both of them even exists,
not worth the trouble they bring to your life, and
hope He responds that is what ended up happening. Bob
was angry that ignored his girlfriend at the dinner, but
(22:11):
I thought it was an unspoken agreement to mutually ignore
each other to avoid any awkward, dude.
Speaker 4 (22:16):
No way you believe that. I'm sorry, no one has
ever believed that ignoring someone sitting right in front of
you like they don't exist is less awkward than making
polite conversation.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
That's completely agree.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
I'm calling you out for that. That's completely agree. I
do completely agree you just you should have just been kind. Yeah,
and feel I feel it is always more awkward to
ignore a person. Yeah, always come on, And that's almost
even that's what they want. Now, I'm like, you're playing
the game. You're like, fine, if she wants to just
like not talk to me, or if she's uncomfortable with
me talking to that, and I guess I won't.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
That is such a good point even, like, but she
could have thought that's what she wanted.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
But come on, you're a human being. Yeah, you're you're
a human.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Let us not I know. Now, let us know if
you agree or disagree.
Speaker 4 (22:58):
I guess if you're on a SAE, it's actually you
can be you know, there's a lack of social cues because.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
She could be did have social anxiety. But let us
know what you think. So a commenter says, for me,
it was Bob agreeing that you were being inappropriate to
the point that he called you and directly asked you
to limit your contact with him. You then rudely don't
say hi to either of them at a dinner when
everyone else does, until he decided to tease Bob about
the period you were his teacher. I'm not shocked the
girlfriend and Bob were so uncomfortable with this interaction, Op responded,
(23:29):
sure that his fair assessment. I said hi to both
them in their direction because I did not want to
address either one individually, just in case it made them uncomfortable.
I left the table to go to the bathroom, and
when I came back, they were there. Hindsight is twenty twenty,
and I can say that I should have talked to them,
since it is now clear she attended the dinner to
meet me. I had thought not talk to them after
Bob asked me to limit contact with him, and not
talking to his girlfriend was respecting their boundary. I'm going
(23:51):
to update my posts, though, to note that I did
not initiate those jokes. I feel like like going back
to what Dakota said. I remember just slight okay storytime
where there's a little bit more to the story, but
slight okay, storytime, one of my roommates said I gotta
go to Puerto Rico and then just left for a
month and left us with this random roommate like that
(24:11):
he found on Facebook marketplace. Like within three days she
came in and was the weirdest person ever. Said she
was allergic to the sun and only went out at night,
like like and like she was literally a vampire. She
would this was like a couple days in a row.
She would Christian and I were sleeping in the same
room because we used to share a room together, and
(24:33):
she would stand in the doorway and go Christian Sam,
Christian Sam, Christian Sam, Christian Sam, until we woke up
and and were like what is it? And she's like,
I'm home and then would like giggle and run off
back to her room. It was and there was like
a whole host of other things. But basically after she
did that a couple of times I was like, hey,
(24:54):
like you really like like you can't like creepily yell
at our names in the mi the night, like we
need some space, right Like I feel like I need
some space.
Speaker 4 (25:04):
I'm glad you survived.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
What she did after that is anytime I entered the
kitchen with her or any room, she would drop everything
on the floor and go put her face in a corner,
and I feel like this is a little bit what
the professor is doing kind of it's like, oh, you
want to get space, let me go like in the
corner real quick, is there anything?
Speaker 5 (25:26):
What are the other little things she would do?
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Oh dude, there was so much.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
She said she got abducted by a cult and like
Christian had to save her. Like she gave us like
a bunch of cookies like months after it, like it
was like you did not eat those We did not
eat those cookies. She knocked on the door and started
bang on the door and she's like, I brought your cookies.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
Like it was like I just think she was very
you know, socially.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
Also, she would she got a record player and got
the Looney Tunes version of what the When You're Jet
You're a West Side story?
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Put it on blast and like this was the.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Day after I said I need some space, and was
a great regressively cooking eggs.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
To the point where the eggs were.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
Splattering all over and was banging the pots like like
I put it down, and I'm like, hey, like, is
everything okay?
Speaker 2 (26:09):
And that's when she went into the corner and like, yeah.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
It was you just had a deeply disturbed random roommate.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
Yeah, and she was like thirty fove too. To add
more context, Yeah, and I think.
Speaker 4 (26:21):
She fell in love with the wildest thing you could
have ever added to that that she's thirty five.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
She's thirty five, and she fell in love with Christian.
Speaker 3 (26:27):
Was literally texting Christian every day, like literally every like
Christian has had this happen so many times, it's gotten worse.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
I am off topic. I need to go back to
the store.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
This is beautiful A little bit. I would say that
the professor is giving like two percent of that energy.
But it's there. It's there, undeniably. Yeah, it's lurking.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
It's a little there.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
But I'm going to update my post though, to note
that I did not initiate those jokes. A guy at
the table mentioned it first, and I confirmed slash ribbed
his bit. Commentary May asked your age and how long
you've been married. Do you think the drinks embolded you
to engage the other person's ribbing of Bob after you
blatantly ignored him, or was it your turn to talk
to Bob after he asked you to chill. Opie says,
not sure why you are downvoted, but we were twenty
(27:14):
six at the time and I was engaged. Then I
referred to my husband as such because it seemed natural.
Like I explained in a separate comment, Bob and his
girlfriend did not talk to me or Maria, and we
did not talk to them either.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
His girlfriend stayed.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
By his side the entire time, and I wasn't about
to walk up to both of them and try to
have a friendly conversation after knowing they were both uncomfortable
with me. Thought it was a mutual, unspoken ignoring of
each other. They seem to have a good time, and
me and Maria had a good time. I didn't know
that they were offended. I didn't talk to them until
after I found the original Reddit post as for engaging
in the ribbing, that was the vibe in the entire night.
(27:46):
There's a good time with friends, sometimes poking fun at
each other, but not seriously. Even at that point, I
still did not directly talk to Bob. I just acknowledged
the joke gesture towards Bob as I was speaking, and
confirmed the joke a different person at the table made
and that was it, and that is where this story ends.
Speaker 4 (28:04):
I think there's no universe in which if she did
have a little crush on Bob, she's gonna go I mean, yeah,
I had a little crush on Bob, but I wasn't
gonna be weird about it. Yeah, it would make a
lot of sense that she goes, hey, look everything is
above board blah blah blah blah blah, but barring some
sort of like you know, it is some kind of it.
Because people on the spectrum it's like if you have
(28:25):
add or it's like you've autism. It's like sometimes you
can like lose you're not really aware of like your
social cues or like proper social like procedures. So it
could make sense like if someone tells you, oh, like
if you find out, oh, this person doesn't want to
know me or get to know me or talk to
me at all, maybe you would kind of hyper zoom
in on that and be like, well, then now I'm
gonna actually ignore them, even though they're sitting across the
table from me, And like it could be coming from
(28:47):
a misguided place. I'm more suspicious that it's coming from
that two percent milk version of You're crazy insane Room.
Speaker 3 (28:54):
Yeah, Facebook, Yeah, I feel like it's giving a little
bit of that energy. But you know, at the end
of the day, I feel like it seems like everything
was above board. It seems like it was just a miscommunication.
I don't think there was any spicy sleep, but I
would love to know from you guys what you think
is this relationship above board?
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Is it not? How do you think it's spiraled?
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Let us known the comments, But with that, that's the
end of this episode. So if you love us, make
sure to subscribe We Love you, and see it tomorrow.
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