I let my step daughter wear BLACK to a wedding… my wife got furious! | Reddit Stories - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
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Speaker 2 (00:17):
I let my stepdaughter wear black to a wedding. My
wife was furious.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
I wonder why.

Speaker 2 (00:24):
I'm male forty eight needs some input. My wife, Linda
female forty, was the maid of honor for my cousin,
Susan female thirty eight. We've been together for ten years,
married for seven, and we have two children together, male five,
female four, along with my stepdaughter Tiffany female sixteen. By
the way, this comes from Uberlin Fox and if you

(00:46):
want to spit your own stories, go to the r
slash Okay story Time, Separate it sho. Tiffany is very
goth email she's pretty much only ever wearing black. Even
her pajamas will at least have Evil Hello Kitty on them.
No such thing. Linda is very detail an image oriented
and can be a little bit of a micromanager. She

(01:07):
gets very hung up on weddings. She was a bit
of a bridezilla at ours, and I joked that Susan
had made her maid of honor because she needed a
bridal attack dog. She wasn't amused, and I stopped making
that joke. In the time leading up to the wedding,
my wife was fighting with Tiffany over what Tiffany would
wear to the wedding. Linda wanted her to dress normal,

(01:28):
and Tiffany refused. Linda ultimately gave her an ultimatum to
pick out an acceptable dress or she would just pick
one for her. Tiffany still refused to budge, and this
ended up with Linda going out on her own and
buying a peach dress that was completely outside of Tiffany's
style and telling her that this was what she was
wearing to the wedding. The day of the wedding, Linda's

(01:51):
made of honor duties had her with the wedding party
super early in the morning and gone all day. I
was going to meet her there along with my stepdaughter.
I dropped off her younger kids with my eldest daughter.
I did a couple of it quick errands, and I
got back to our house just in time to leave
if everything went smoothly. When I got there, Tiffany was
not wearing the peach dress, but instead she was wearing

(02:15):
a fancy black dress that was much more like what
she normally wears, lace sleeves, kind of a corset thing,
going on longer in the back than in front. Basically
what I would have expected her to wear to a
wedding kind of Wednesday atam vibes Yeah, imagine.

Speaker 3 (02:30):
Yeah, that's her wedding style.

Speaker 2 (02:32):
Yeah. I asked her if this is what her mom
said she could wear, and she said, don't worry about it,
it's too late to change. I tried telling her that
she should change into the other dress, but she said
that there wasn't enough time and changing dresses would take forever,
and furthermore, that her makeup wouldn't match the other dress. Anyway,

(02:55):
Tiffany does spend a lot of time on makeup, and
while I'm not an expert, I guess even I could
tell that her her hair, makeup, and accessories wouldn't match
the other dress, even if there was time to change.
He's like, no, well, I don't know too much about
all this makeup stuff, but I suppose she's rat. It
can't tell a girl to wear mismatched makeup and dress.

(03:18):
We just went with Tiffany and the dress she was wearing.
We arrived at the ceremony and Linda was kind of
preoccupied with helping Susan all that, but she low key
grilled me about what Tiffany was wearing, and I just
shrugged and explained to where the situation as it was,
she was already wearing the dress, already had her hair
and makeup done. Makeup wouldn't match the other dress, and
there was no time to change, et cetera, nothing to

(03:40):
be done about it at this point. She didn't have
a whole lot of time to hang around and talk
with me. With everything going on, Tiffany got some looks,
but she always does. She does stand out a bit,
as you might expect. People seemed mostly fine with her,
though Tiffany rode with me to the reception. She had
been studiously dodging her mother as much as possible. Shortly

(04:01):
after we were there, I noticed Tiffany's best friend, Bethany
female sixteen, hanging around in a slightly more understated goth dress.
Apparently she drove herself and Tiffany helped her crash the party.
It was a big venue with a lot of guests,
and she was pretty easy to ignore. My wife and
my cousin both work for my dad's company, so I
was at a table with him and some of their

(04:22):
other coworkers. He noticed that Tiffany had snuck Bethany in
and alerted me when he elbowed me, pointing and saying,
they're multiplying. Throughout the reception, Tiffany and Bethany were taking
photos of each other, mostly Bethany taking them of Tiffany.
Her mom got on her again, but with a wedding

(04:43):
planner somehow, mia she couldn't devote too much attention to them.
She told me to handle them and that they were
drawing too much attention. Black is fairly normal color to
where I've worn a black dress to a wedding. Sure,
I I mean I imagine that they're more focused on
on like the accessories and the makeup. Yeah, probably that

(05:03):
is more goth probably, but like black is really a
pretty normal wedding color.

Speaker 3 (05:09):
Just like why do we care?

Speaker 2 (05:11):
Dakota is oau seeks teen.

Speaker 3 (05:14):
Year olds are a wearing to the wedding. They're sixteen,
they're teenagers. They're goth. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (05:19):
They agreed to tone it down and they were more
subtle and subdued. Subdued after that, Bethany had a collapsible
camera standstick thing she had been setting up around different places,
and she either stopped using it or stayed out of
the way more. Both of them seemed to just stay
out from underfoot too much. Linda gave me a few
looks during the wedding itself and the reception, but she
was very busy and she seemed to have put on

(05:40):
a face to keep from adding too much drama during
the day. But she laid into me on the way home.
She was upset that I let Tiffany come to the
wedding looking like a vampire and drawing attention to herself.
She said, I knew she was supposed to wear the
other dress and not be in so much makeup. To
hear her tell about it, Tiffany was a total spectacle

(06:03):
and her appearance was totally inappropriate. Linda said that it's
never appropriate for a guest to wear black to a wedding.
That's false, that's false information. Where are you getting your information?
The only unacceptable colors that I know of or white
and red, that Tiffany's dress was too eye catching, that
she was embarrassed and mortified, and that I let Tiffany

(06:25):
do whatever she wants. She said that I shouldn't have
let Tiffany and her friend turn the wedding into a
cosplay event and the reception into their private photoshoot. I
think that's kind of fair. I think if they're like
being disruptive and like doing a whole photo shoot, I
think it's fair.

Speaker 3 (06:42):
To Sayemony, sure, but at the reception, I think.

Speaker 2 (06:46):
Yeah, I think if they're like being very disruptive, but.

Speaker 3 (06:49):
The reception, yes, how do you be disruptive? That that's
the big party that happens after the wedding.

Speaker 2 (06:54):
I am saying, if they are being disruptive, But I
also think that he addressed that. So I feel like
her point is kind of moot because he already addressed that.

Speaker 4 (07:01):
She's given me the energy of like these young kids
were out here taking photographs of themselves.

Speaker 3 (07:07):
It's like, yeah, so what.

Speaker 2 (07:09):
In my defense, yes, I knew they had been fighting
about Tiffany's dress and makeup, but I had been doing
errands that Linda gave me before I got home, and
when I got home, Tiffany was already dressed. We didn't
have a whole lot of time, and I knew from
experience that she can take quite a while changing clothes
or doing makeup. As I mentioned, she said that her

(07:30):
makeup wouldn't match the other dress. Anyway, She didn't draw
that much attention at the wedding. Sure she got some
looks she always does, but it was nothing major. Her
and her friend hardly turned the reception into a private
photo shoot. Mostly was just Bethany taking some photos, which yeah,
proves again they weren't even being disruptive. They were taking photos.

Speaker 3 (07:50):
Oh did this?

Speaker 2 (07:51):
A lot of people do. Tiffany did kind of awkwardly
hang around the photographer until he took some pictures of her,
but it wasn't enough to derail anything. You know what,
like a lot of people, we'll go up to the
frog room and be like.

Speaker 4 (08:01):
Hey, can we get like a picture of you know,
this is just beef with because she's got because she looks.

Speaker 3 (08:06):
Like she's different. Yeah, she's different there in the peach dress.

Speaker 2 (08:10):
By that point, it seemed like he was just looking
for interesting things to shoot, and I guess she fit
the bill. The girls cooled it with their own photo setups.
After I talked to them, Linda complained about Tiffany having
a bouquet as she was posing with, but she didn't
even have that. When we left the house, Bethany brought
a bouquet of fake black roses with her. When Tiffany
led her in, I guess, like, none of this is

(08:30):
Obe's fault.

Speaker 4 (08:31):
Yeah, that's it's this is Uh. Why are we giving
so much mental energy to like the outfit of a
sixteen year old? Yeah, if they were like twenty five,
I feel like it'd be different. Yeah, you know, if
they were a literal child, Yeah, then it'd be like,
all right, now, this feels really pointedly disrespectful.

Speaker 3 (08:49):
I agree, But this is, again, a teenager.

Speaker 2 (08:53):
I'm pretty sure I've seen that same bouquet before. Susan
didn't even care that much if she noticed at all.
I've tried to Linda lots of times that lots of
things don't need to be a problem unless you decide
to make them a problem. I've also told her that
you have to pick your battles with teenage girls, and
that the more you try to fight with them, the
more you end up getting drama and pushback. I'm a

(09:14):
bit more experienced in the area. I have two adult daughters,
twenty eight and twenty two, who are both total daddy's girls,
even to this day. Tiffany is Linda's oldest kid and
was her only one until our kid's together. I've always
had a great relationship with Tiffany even since she was
a little kid, probably because you're not like, super like controlling. Yeah, well,

(09:35):
he's like, ah, dad's cool. He'll just let me do
what I want.

Speaker 4 (09:38):
And on the other side of that coin, look at
how she turned out. She's a goth monster who takes
photos of herself at weddings.

Speaker 2 (09:46):
I've always had a great relationship with Tiffany even since
she was a little kid, and part of that is
probably because I don't pick fights with her like her
mom does. Yeah. H Linda says that I let her
do whatever she wants, but that it's not true. I'm
very strict with her about her grades and her chores.
She used to leave huge messes in the bathroom of
makeup and hair stuff. Linda fought with her about it,

(10:08):
and while I just sort of calmly explained that everyone
needs to clean up after themselves and if she's gonna
make a mess in there, she has to be the
one to clean it. And it was fine. She'll babysit
for me when I ask. But again, her mom always
turns it into some kind of power struggle that turns
into an argument. She'll try to micromanage and add additional tasks. Well,
I'll just ask her if she can watch her little

(10:30):
sister and brother for a bit, and if she says okay,
then that's good enough. Sometimes if I need a briber
a little bit, I'm briber a little As for as
far as her being embarrassed in front of her coworkers,
they all thought Tiffany was cute, and even after Bethany crashed,
it was more just something to occasionally talk about than
anything anyone was scandalized over. We made a few jokes

(10:52):
about the Goth invasion and that was it. I was
around them and my dad way more than she was
that night, anyway, and no one minded. She even spent
some time talking about makeup with my mother. So long
story long, my wife is still getting after my stepdaughter
about what she wore to the wedding, being moody about
it and causing unnecessary tension while I've just told her

(11:14):
that this doesn't matter and it doesn't have to be
a thing. She's had some of her friends, notably not
the Bright, herself, my cousins, nor any of her coworkers
who were actually at the wedding chime in about how
I'm an a hole for this, but I just feel
like she's making something out of nothing. Am I the
a hole for letting my stepdaughter wear a black dress

(11:35):
to a wedding? And there are some relem the comments
and an update but to.

Speaker 3 (11:39):
Many thoughts, No, not the a hole.

Speaker 4 (11:43):
I mean, like you know, I did see some pretty
uh sharp comments that it's like, you know, a sixteen
year old teenager, like that's old enough to have a
conversation with about like yeah, sometimes you gotta maybe not
be fully goth at the wedding.

Speaker 2 (12:01):
Sure, but.

Speaker 3 (12:03):
You know there's also like the the notion.

Speaker 4 (12:06):
Of like choosing your battles, where it's like, all right,
we got to get to the wedding yewhere, like she's
already ready to go, like all right, this is where
you're wearing that to the wedding?

Speaker 2 (12:15):
Okay. I mean if Op had told her to change,
his wife would probably have gotten that that he was late. Yeah,
that would have been the whole different like argument that
they had. So there really was no wedding for him,
and he chose the one that made at least one
person happy, cause you know, two people would have been
happy if he made her change, or unhappy if he

(12:35):
made her change.

Speaker 4 (12:36):
Sixteen's like a delicate age.

Speaker 3 (12:40):
Yeah, and we don't always feel the.

Speaker 2 (12:42):
Best better Olf. Yeah, it's like she don't want to
own skin, so you want to make something, you know what,
you want to wear something that makes you literally wear
whatever makes her the most comfortable. And if it's that,
then it's then let her wear as long as she
looks presentable, like, you know, she's not in sweats and
like a ratty T shirt, then well, what's the problem.

(13:03):
She's informal attire.

Speaker 3 (13:05):
She's in vampire chic.

Speaker 2 (13:06):
Yes, and vampires are very formal. Come on anyway, there
are some relevant comments old cousin Greg. Did Susan care?
Opie says no, not as far as I can tell.
She didn't seem surprised or upset, and she didn't really
say anything about it. She notably hasn't complained at me
about it, unlike some of the allies. My wife has
rallied after the fact, Chilling Storm says, not the ale.

(13:29):
You pick your battles, and you weren't gonna win that one.
With your stepdaughter wearing black to a wedding at sixteen
is kind of a big shrug laughing. Fox's hot tip
to other parents of goth leaning kids. Very dark green
can be your friend. It's close enough to black, especially
in velvet or other fancy fabric, that you might be
able to convince them to wear it instead of black.
If that's kind of a big deal otherwise, trying to

(13:51):
stick a goth kid into a peach dress that was
never gonna fly. Opie says, Oh, she definitely knew Tiffany
would hate the dress. When my wife bought it, I
instantly told her I could never imagine her wearing it
in a million years. She just said, well, that's what
she's wearing, which feels like another power struggle thing, like
she's trying to assert her dominance as Tiffany's mom. It's like, well,

(14:14):
I know you're gonna hate this, and this is why
I'm making you do it. But there is an update.
I had a talk with Linda and we covered a
lot of the same points that people brought up here
in the thread. I had already mentioned to her that
getting into fights over things that don't really matter only
causes tension and resentment between her and Tiffany, But I
also emphasize the fact that Tiffany is almost an adult. Yeah,
she's two years from being an adult, and that pushing

(14:36):
her away might eventually make her stay away. Linda seemed
to take it in when I emphasized that she has
to let Tiffany be who she wants and that she
can't really force the matter as if she were a
little kid. We got together with both of our parents
over Mother's Day, and my own mom told Linda that
she thought Tiffany's outfit had been very pretty, that she
admired the effort Tiffany puts into her looks, and that

(14:57):
Tiffany was a charming young lady as usual.

Speaker 3 (14:59):
Wa there you go, and there you have it, folks.

Speaker 2 (15:03):
She and I noted that it would have been much
more unpleasant to have a miserable, sulky teenager being uncomfortable
and resentful throughout the night. Excellent point.

Speaker 3 (15:11):
Are you sure about that?

Speaker 4 (15:12):
Because sure this version of her was taking photographs at
the recears.

Speaker 2 (15:16):
She was literally taking photographs out of the reception like some
kind of demon, like a monster. Linda's own mom was
a little bit more judgmental, but she mostly held her tongue. Yeah,
I wonder where Linda gets it from, but she mostly
held her tongue Beyond the few looks and offhand remarks.
Of course, everyone already knew that our views on fashion
were a lot more conventional, and that she thinks I'm

(15:36):
too lax and permissive. We don't actually see my wife's
parents that often, just a few times a year, if
not for the wedding. This might have been the first
time seeing them since at least around Thanksgiving. But I
did note to Linda that, given the choice, Tiffany clearly
spends more time with my mom than with her own
biological grandmother, probably because her biological grandmother and mother kind.

Speaker 4 (15:59):
Of probably because she gets the sense whenever she's around
there that they don't like her or accept her.

Speaker 2 (16:06):
And they judge her. Maybe that's it.

Speaker 4 (16:09):
Oh, guys, don't we just even realize, like you're especially
when you're talking about kids, but like even as like adults,
Like when it's like you're expecting someone for who they are.
It's like you're only doing it for like this moment, Yeah,
because it's like they're gonna be someone else at some point.

Speaker 3 (16:23):
They're not gonna be the same forever.

Speaker 2 (16:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (16:25):
So it's all about just taking people as they are
right now, exactly.

Speaker 2 (16:29):
I did have Tiffany go ahead and apologize to Susan
just in case, and I chatted with her briefly as well.
Susan hadn't noticed or known that Bethany wasn't invited. She's like,
I don't know, it was just another kid. Yeah, it
was a big wedding at a big venue, and she
wasn't too fussed over it. Apparently she was still within
the margins of the planning. I don't mind coddling Tiffany

(16:49):
a little bit, and I just try to be a
good dad. I am the only father that she has.
My wife's late husband passed away a couple of years
before we met. I could tell that she needed a dad,
and I was glad to treat her the same as
I had my older girls. I guess it's not always
easy being a stepparent, but Tiffany and I have always
gotten along and I love her. Very evident that this

(17:10):
guy is a girl's dad, girl dad, so god dad.
He's like, I want my little girls to be like
happy and comfortable, and you know, I don't know much
about makeup, but they like it. I love this guy.
I guess it's not always being easy being a stepparent,
but Tiffany and I have always gotten along and I
love her. By the way. I would love for you

(17:31):
guys to listen to full episodes of stories just like this.
Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcast, or iHeartRadio and search up. Okay,
story time. Do you have any final thoughts?

Speaker 3 (17:41):
No, I've said them all.

Speaker 2 (17:43):
My final thoughts is I'm I'm at first when we
were reading the story, I was like, why is Opie
with this very type a very like everything has to
go my way or the highway type lady. But I
guess sometimes you have someone who's so chill that they
are the only people that like these type you know,

(18:04):
this type of person, this type of type of a lot. Yeah,
I know that's what I'm saying. I'm like, yeah, maybe
they're the only type of people that can get along
with that type of person. Linda can be a bit
type a I know that.

Speaker 3 (18:18):
Oh I nail that, and.

Speaker 2 (18:20):
She was definitely super stressed about the wedding day. She
ended up with a lot on her plate, practically meaning
to step into the wedding planner's shoes. The planner's son
was in the hospital. He's totally fine now, probably an
allergic reaction. It was a wonder that the day went
as smoothly as it did. She was hugely responsible for that.
She ultimately admitted that I probably did the right thing.
But I told her that every girl wants to look

(18:42):
pretty and feel confident, and you should almost always let
them not do a thing. That's how it's gonna make
them look and feel I think I.

Speaker 4 (18:51):
Think what that meant is and you should never make
them do something if you know that doing it will
make them.

Speaker 2 (18:57):
There's a lot of negatives. Yes, it was also worth
pointing out that Tiffany would have looked wild in the
pictures in a peach dress with her goth makeup, more
so if she was clearly in a rotten mood. The
two of them seem to have patched things up quite
a bit, and we all had a really nice brunch together. Heck, yeah,
so all's well, that ends well. I guess Comment one says,

(19:21):
My rule is that it's only a problem if the
bridergroom sees it as a problem because it's their special
eight it's their time. If it's a problem for someone else,
I don't care much. Reply says truth. I wore an
all white dress to my cousin's wedding, albeit I was eight.
That's on your parents, Na, Why did they let you
wear it all white dress?

Speaker 3 (19:42):
You're a crafty, little eight year old heart.

Speaker 2 (19:44):
Yeah, you knew what you were doing.

Speaker 3 (19:46):
Dastardly.

Speaker 2 (19:46):
It was my communion dress and the only fancy dress
I owned. My mom called my cousin beforehand to ask, okay, Rachel,
and she said, quote, she's eight. I don't think anyone
will mistake her for the bride. I ended up spilling
pepsi on my dress. The reception though, bummer. Comment two.
The problem here isn't the wedding. It's that mom hates
her hates who her daughter is, and is fighting tooth

(20:08):
and nail to try and force her to be the
person she envisioned her daughter would be when they said
it's a girl. And as op is mentioned here, that
is the way you lose your adult children. Comment three
says it really depends on where you are New York
high society. Black is fine, the Hampton's fine, We're black.
Southern church wedding. Don't you dare?

Speaker 3 (20:29):
How don't you dare?

Speaker 4 (20:30):
Is it?

Speaker 2 (20:31):
Maybe it's like a cultural thing because I've never heard
that in my neck of the ones.

Speaker 3 (20:38):
Uh yeah, maybe let us know to create a new
wedding culture.

Speaker 2 (20:42):
I know you will, and it's gonna be a secret wedding.
But that's the end of that story, folks. I feel
like it's all sortid. Yep. My girlfriend discovered my savings.
Now she wants to be a stay at home mom.
How much are you making a bit of background, My
girlfriend and I are thirty and thirty one, respectively. We
have been dating for about a year. I work as

(21:04):
a high level engineer at a good firm and my
girlfriend works as a payroll specialist at.

Speaker 3 (21:09):
A good firm too.

Speaker 2 (21:10):
I make significantly more than her three times. By the way,
this comes from throwaway trophy girlfriend And if you want
to spit your own stories, go to the r slash
Okay storytimes up at it. Things were good in our
relationship until I showed her my retirement and savings. She
now doesn't see the point of working and has started
framing our relationship in that she is the beautiful one

(21:31):
and I'm the nerdy engineer that was lucky to have her.
Before when we met, she was all about making it
her own way, eventually starting her own company with her
sister and sourcing and recruiting. But now she jokes about
driving a range Rover and wearing Lululemon and going to yoga.
We were having a discussion again about this trophy wife stuff.
She'd brought up that I was nerdy back in the
day while she was very popular. I told her she's

(21:52):
not a trophy wife. That yes, she's attractive, but it's
not a huge difference between us. I told her. Had
it been the case that I met her when she
was twenty two and I was my current age, then sure,
but she isn't twenty two anymore. After I said that,
she just started crying like crazy. She started saying that
I think of her as ugly and youthed up at
her best years are behind her. She just told me

(22:13):
that if I'm not happy to be with her, why
am I even here to stop wasting her time. I
tried to talk to her, but she was in no
state for a conversation. I don't know what to say.
Guys for me, I just wanted to say that I
think we're similar in attractiveness, Like I don't think anyone
when they see us turns their head and is like, Oh,
she's with them because of the money, or dang, he's
so lucky to be with her. I think it's mutual.

(22:35):
She was the one that if anything went after my
attractiveness first, What should I do? I like the fact
that we both work, and I don't want to change
that dynamic. And I don't want her to think too
that she is above me, that I'm so lucky to
have her. I want her to think of us as equals,
and in my attempt to do that, I hurt her feelings.
What's the next move? Top Common says, this seems to
be a very textbook case of psychological projection. Because of

(22:59):
your discription and see in salary, she likely feels she
is worth less than you. She likely feels like her
best years are behind her, seeing as you took off
and are only going up. Her poking around about her
being a trophy wife is seeking validation that she is
not worthless and that you still value her and her
financial contributions are nothing to be ashamed of. I don't
think she's a gold digger. I think she's taking some

(23:20):
hits on her self esteem, though no fault of your
or her own. I think some counseling would go a
long way here.

Speaker 4 (23:28):
Edit.

Speaker 2 (23:28):
Thank you all for your awards and replies. I appreciate
the recognition. There is a lot to unpack for both
the op and his girlfriend in this situation, but the
point is that is worth unpacking. Cheer stee Baum eighteen says,
I think that the trophy wife nonsense started when she
found out how inadequate her money is compared to yours.
She was slash, is ambitious, She wanted success and was

(23:49):
confident in her achievements when she found out that your
income created something that she wanted to accomplish, but is
now realizing that she may never get that type of
money or success. I think it's sent her into a
midlike crisis. Her new perspective demonstrates her desire to be
the best at something. The trophy wife you kind of
described above is a new visual successful image to her.
She has money, is beautiful, can wear the name brand clothes,

(24:12):
does yoga, and has a husband who appreciates her for
her looks because she is popular. These examples show that
she wants to be appreciated and successful in some aspect
of her life. I think she's going the superficial route
because she feels like she hasn't achieved the success she
wanted at her age. She isn't as financially successful as you,
her job is probably piqued in salary, and she needs

(24:33):
to feel needed, appreciated, and better than you in some way.
Three days later, a couple of things I want to
add to the people that said my girlfriend was a
gold digger. She has really climbed her own way from
university to where she is now and has a good
work ethic, like this is not just someone that their
whole life. Also to the people that said my girlfriend
lost motivation after seeing my wealth, she has dated guys

(24:55):
that made more than me. Overall, I wanted my girlfriend
to feel special, like she's the most beautiful woman the world.
But I don't like that she is above me, that
she is on a pedestal, and that I am this
inferior engineer. We had a discussion and things honestly just
got worse. I tried to talk to her, but she
was just bringing up the worst things I said to
her without any of the context of her basically calling

(25:16):
me ugly. Also, she brought up too that my dad
was awkward as heck yea, and now we're bringing them
parents into the conversation. She's like, you're ugly and your
dad's awkward. She brings up my comments about me, saying
that she would be a trophy wife at twenty two
but not at thirty. She goes on to say that
all the engineers she's met have a chip on their
shoulder for not getting laid when they were in college.

(25:36):
And she goes on to start saying that the bitterness
is coming out thinking that they're entitled to a hot
young girlfriend because they couldn't date them in college, and
that is why I made that comment, trying to tear
her down. Oh so he was like, yeah, maybe if
you were twenty two, that makes a little bit more sense. Yeah,
like back when you were twenty two, you were hot.
Well I think maybe what he was trying to say
is like you were hot young girlfriend, maybe if you

(25:58):
were twenty two. But you're the same ages me, so
it doesn't you can't that's exactly. And she was like, yeah,
she was here and I'm not hoked. I just got frustrated,
so I was like, yeah, I agree. I was never
able to get the hot girl in college, and even
with all the money I make, still can't get them now.
So unfortunately I have to go secondhand and with a

(26:18):
couple of wrinkles. Again. This just set things off where
she called me a misogynist for calling her second hand
not wrong, said that I treated her like a used car,
and pretty sure when she tells her friends about her fight,
that's what she'll tell them. I don't know what to say.
It was just ridiculous, like she started this whole thing
that I can't get the girls I supposed they really want,
Like she's the one making this whole dating thing and

(26:39):
to have and have nots. So if you want that analogy,
I'll play that analogy too. I just agreed with it,
and now I'm the bad guy. I don't know what
to do. She will say ten bad things about me,
that I was ugly, that I'm lucky to be with her,
but when I respond, she blows up and storms out.
I don't know what the heck to do, Like we
had fights before, but this just seems to be impossible.
We had decent communication but for but now it's trash.

(27:01):
I don't know what to do, Like, I am more
than open to talk without putting each other down, but
she really wants me to be in subservient position. I
don't know. Maybe in her past relationships she had that
power over guys where they were like, oh gee, I'm
dating someone so attractive, But I'm not okay with that.
I don't know what she wants at this point. It
seems like she's looking for a reason to break up.
I know some people are saying breakup, but I really

(27:23):
was hoping to settle down soon. I hate the idea
of starting from scratch all over again and dating like
we had so many amazing times together and a good
idea of the future. Dude, is in the cost sung fuff.

Speaker 1 (27:34):
Poof, we're wrong.

Speaker 3 (27:36):
Yeah, you're like, oh, I can't getting the hawk girls.

Speaker 2 (27:37):
Now a hot girl leave her. I was excited someone
beautiful and ambitious, and I got along with Well now
this two months ago we were talking about rings, how
many people we would have at her wedding, whether we
will send our kids to private school or not. By
the way, you can send your kids over to listen
to full episodes of stories just like this. Just go

(27:58):
to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or I Heart Radio in search
of Okay story time. But there is a little bit
left to this story. Please send me your analysis of
the situation here it is break up with her. If
there's something from the female perspective I don't understand, please
tell me she doesn't like you. I don't want to
let this go without putting in my all. But I'm
not going to be in a subservient position. What should

(28:19):
I do? How can I handle this properly? And Alita says, yeah,
this relationship is over. There's no bouncing back from this.
Katie c x I says, unfortunately, I have to go
secondhand has a yaike stamped on it in one hundred
and four point font man And that's the end of
that stories, folks.

Speaker 5 (28:36):
The more he really like doubled down on being like
and she's really not that great.

Speaker 2 (28:41):
Yeah, I was starting to be like, whoa, No, that's
something she doesn't like her either, right, Like, that's he's
an active participant in how unhealthy this relationship is. She
started the whole thing, but he's kind of like really late.
He's like, oh, oh, you're gonna hit me. I'm gonna
hit you two more times. It's like, no, this is
not a boxing match.

Speaker 5 (28:59):
Engineer brain being like, I really would like like a
detailed analysis.

Speaker 2 (29:04):
Can you send that over to me please? I think
I did wrong. It's pretty easy, man. But that's the
end of that story.

Speaker 4 (29:10):
Hey, John og host here, we're gonna get back to
this episode, but a quick three minute break of ads
from a sponsor's keeping the show alive.

Speaker 2 (29:17):
I refuse to give up my wedding budget for my
sick brother. That's not in the budget. I have a
rocky relationship with my dad and his new wife, Karen.
My mom passed away when I was twelve, and my
dad remarried when I was fourteen. From the start, Karen
makes it clear that her two boys, Hans twenty nine
Mail and John twenty six Mail, need to come first,

(29:41):
and my dad obliged. By the way, this comes from
Throway usd. Twelve thousand and if you want to submit
your own stories, go to the r slash Okay Storytime supper.
It So, when I was sixteen, I finally moved out
after a big fight. Karen sold my mom's grand piano,
stating we don't use it too much. That's actually crazy.
Those are grand pianos are like I didn't understand this,

(30:04):
but for the longest time, giano grampianos are so expensive.
They're like crazy expensive. My mom loves music and piano.
I love it too. That piano was a way for
us to bond when she was still alive. Oh. I
always play that piano when I miss my mom or
when I fought with anyone in that family. It was

(30:25):
one of the only Mom's possessions that didn't immediately go
missing when Karen moved in, probably because it was too
big for her to steal. Steal a holy grand piano.
My dad was shielding Karen from my anger, and I
told him that he was a horrible father. My stepbrothers
jumped in, saying that my father is the best dad
that anyone could ask for. I told them they were

(30:45):
not my father's actual kids and that we are not family.
Karen cried when she heard that, and I could see
that my dad was hurt by my words. I feel
guilty and was about to apologize, but before I could,
everything else escalated physically with John has tried to keep
things calm, but my dad chose to run after Karen. Instead,

(31:07):
I packed my things and stayed at my uncle's until
I was twenty when I moved in with my boyfriend
at the time. Wow, not once did my dad try
to reach out to me. I heard from a cousin
that my dad practically disowned me at a family reunion,
saying that the boys are the only children he has. Ouh.
I met my current fiance twenty nine mail when I

(31:28):
was twenty three, and he proposed recently, we saved up
some money for the wedding, but not anything big. However,
my uncles from my mother's side chime in and give
me money in honor of my mother. I wanted to
save it, but they told me to have a grand
wedding and be the most important person that day, which
meant a lot. After years of my wants being ignored,

(31:51):
the wedding got upgraded by a lot. I invited my
grandparents and some cousins from my dad's side. Suddenly, after
more than a decade, Dad contact did me, suspicious, You
didn't ask to be invited, or apologized or anything. He
just heard I'm doing a big wedding and decided to
ask for money. Oh no, no, no, I'm sorry. Yeah.

(32:17):
We literally, I'm sorry you come back after a decade
of being trash. You should pay her back for the
like what you uh, the money that you made off
that piano? Yeah, buy her piano for her wedding. I
frankly was disgusted by his audacity and lack of remorse.
He asked for twelve thousand dollars. I told him I'm
sorry about John's condition, but I'm not giving him twelve

(32:39):
thousand dollars and to not contact me again. The next day,
Karen blew up my phone, calling me Falfesch and entitled, Wow,
that's a great way to get op to give you money.
My cousin told me that Dad and Karen go to
every single relative's house, including my grandparents, that night, and
told them to not come to my wedding or they

(33:00):
will cut them off. My cousins didn't care, but my
grandparents are stressing out over this. Some relatives think I
should downgrade the wedding and give Dad some money so
my grandparents can come without worries. Frankly speaking, I don't
even have half the money they asked for. Yes, the
wedding costs around sixteen thousand, but a lot of that
money comes from my uncles given to me for this

(33:22):
specific reason emphasized by them, So I don't think I
should use it for something else. What do I do?
Should I give them the money? My uncle gave me
more contact on my relationship with everyone before I moved out,
Dad deteriorating as I constantly begged him to take my side.
Karen bad because she would throw away or sell my
mom's possessions and pictures, trying to erase her existence. Has

(33:46):
civil He's one of the people that prefers not to
get involved in anyone's problems. He doesn't help me, but
doesn't fight me either. I guess apathy could also describe them.
John bad because he would pull pranks and sometimes it
got physical. He's also the type that would punch a wall.
I nail John. I nailed that when angry, so I

(34:09):
stayed away from him most of the time. After I
moved out, of course, all the relationships got worse, and
there is an edits and an update. Folks. But Carly,
what do you think GOP should do? Not give them
the money?

Speaker 4 (34:23):
No?

Speaker 2 (34:24):
Absolutely not, absolutely not.

Speaker 5 (34:27):
You've already sold all the mom's possessions. Yeah, she doesn't
get any of that money exactly, she doesn't have the money.

Speaker 2 (34:33):
Yeah, no, they took all of your money or your
mom's money and stuff from like all those possessions and stuff.
We didn't talked to them in ten years. In ten years,
like emotionally they've distanced from you, and also they like
financially distanced from you. I'm assuming they weren't paying anything
after you turned sixteen, like they probably didn't pay for college. No,

(34:55):
and she moved out. Why would I ever help out
the family that disowned me? It sixteen, So yeah, don't
give these people. Now, go to the uncles exactly. Yeah,
the uncles gave you all that money, and they said
this is for the wedding. It's not for you to,
you know, help out your greedy ex family at it.

(35:15):
Adding info, People are asking if my grandparents know about
the harmful acts, I endured the answer is not yet.
When I moved out, I ran to my mom's side
of the family because I knew for sure that they
would take my side. No butts are saying, but he's
your dad bs my dad, and Karen told everyone he
disowned me because I lashed out at Karen with no

(35:37):
reason verbally abused my dad when he tried to de
escalate the situation and then ran away, even if that
was their excuse, Like, even if that was true, still
a lot of reason to disown a sixteen year old, right,
You can't just leave your kid out on the streets. No, yeah,
I'm sorry, Oh, she yelled at me. That's like typical
teenager things. My dad's family's very hush hush about family

(36:01):
matters and would talk behind the person's back and not
to the person. Horrible, I know, but human. Except for
my cousin, the same one from the story. Let's call
her Jane, so I don't have to refer to her
as only my cousin again. And her family dad, mom,
little brother. They are curious and not afraid to ask,
so they asked me to explain my side the second

(36:21):
my dad disowned me. Jane and her family might have
told others, but honestly, I don't know and don't care
if they knew back then. As far as why I
don't talk about it, well, First, the extended relatives, including
my grandparents, never ask, so it feels weird if I
just talk about it. Second, when I just move out
and everything a pain, exhaustion, sadness felt fresh. I wanted

(36:44):
to escape and didn't want to deal with Dad and stepfamily.
So I felt like if I defended myself and told
my story, I'm just inviting them to argue with me,
and I don't want that. So I stayed silent and
let people believe what they wanted. If they wanted to
be on my side, then I'll tell them, but then
let it be third. I do not know how they
will accept that story. Will they believe me? Will they

(37:06):
tell me that I overreacted. They would never tell me
that it's just in my head. They would never actually
tell me that it's just my head. So, as a
teenager with low self esteem, I decided not to speak.
If you're all asking, why don't you talk now as
an adult, simply because I forgot about it. It's been
more than a decade and I try to heal from that.

(37:28):
I don't tell myself every day about the bad things
that happened to me. I simply moved on and live
my life. The only reason this became relevant is because
I want to provide context on why I despise John
and what caused my family to drift apart. I would
give my dad's family a bit of credit actually in
terms of this. Even though dad and step family painted

(37:48):
me as the one and the wrong, they still reached
out to me and supported me here and there. They
should have asked my side, but hey, my family works
like that and there's nothing I could do. I don't
know how you're not reaching out to ask. Yeah, sixteen
year old about her side of things. You know, if
I in this hypothetical world that I had a niece
or you know, young cousin or something that I was

(38:10):
close to before had run away from home and then
was disowned, I'd be like, right, here are you okay?
Also happened?

Speaker 5 (38:19):
You would think maybe you would know your brother enough
yeah to be like, oh that's something he would do exactly.

Speaker 2 (38:25):
Yeah. It's like, oh yeah, he sucks. Yeah, he freaking sucks.
Comments comment one says. Another commenter said it best dad
only wants to be in your life because you have
money that he wants. No, they don't get that money,
have the wedding you want, And for those who don't
want to come because of your father's threats, that's a
them problem. You don't know any of them your money.

(38:46):
Please don't feel guilty. Live your best life. Ohp he says,
thank you for your comments. I don't give a crab
if anyone else is not coming. But my grandparents, alongside
my uncle's, were the biggest support I had when I
lost my mom. They are the only grandma parents I
have since my mom's parents passed away when my mom
was two and seven. I think the best solution is
to not have my grandparents at my wedding so they

(39:08):
can keep a relationship with my dad. I mean, if
that's what they're gonna choose, then you can't really do
anything about that. But I want them to if they
supported you the most. Yeah, go to them and have
a conversation and say, hey, this is why I'm not
giving them money. Yeah, They're like, pay sixteen thousand dollars
and your grandparents will come to your wedding. They'll let

(39:30):
yeah exactly reply. That may be best. Could you TikTok
on or Facebook live stream it for them? Oh the wedding,
have a cousin over there help them with the technology.
Ohp he says, that's an interesting suggestion. I guess I
could ask one of my cousins to stream it for them,
especially for the vows. I will ask if my grandparents

(39:50):
would want that, and there is an update, But I
don't know why would your grandparents want to have a
relationship with someone who disowned their child.

Speaker 5 (40:00):
I feel like potentially if she does have that conversation,
they'll realize and be like, yeah, we'll come to your wedding.

Speaker 2 (40:07):
You're so right about that? Yeah? Or also, why does
it have to be Opee's money? You know, like, why
aren't they reaching out to other people that they're still
close with or have a relationship with because they're going
to Opee you saying you have to give us the.

Speaker 5 (40:24):
Money, and then still going to everybody else and being
like she has to give us.

Speaker 2 (40:28):
The money, and everyone's like, yeah, you have to give
them the money. It's like, why aren't you you guys
giving them money? Update though, Hi everyone, First of all,
thank you for the support and kind words. Uh, even
with this issue, I'm still excited about my wedding. I
plan to update everyone after it, but I feel like
I owe you guys an update after what happened recently.

(40:49):
So my dad calls me again this afternoon. Against my
better judgment, I answered. Surprisingly he was nice and said
he just wanted to talk. I'm honestly, not that surprised
because he's trying to manipulate you into giving him money.
I got carried away and basically confronted him on everything
that has happened in the past, the lack of support,

(41:11):
the harmful acts I had to endure, and the fact
that he turned his back on me. He apologized and
clarified some things. He said that he never realized my
mom's possessions were missing because he was not that attentive.
The grand piano, however, Yeah, the big thing that's really
obviously missing, caught him by surprise too. Again, for people

(41:33):
who don't know, grand pianos can be around ten thousand dollars.
They are very expensive. He said he was planning to
have a stern talk with Karen, but I was already screaming,
so his priority was to separate us. He said, I
look like I was getting physical, so that's why he
got between us. I asked why he didn't defend me

(41:55):
when John was being physical with me. He said he
was chasing Karen and didn't see it happen or me
on the floor. I could have sworn he saw me
laying there, but I might be wrong, so I didn't argue,
come on, sounds like it was more than a WALLT yeah,
I like even, yeah, yeah, it does. Even if he
didn't see the moment that had happened, he would have

(42:15):
seen you on the floor afterwards, like I'm sure you
were like crying or something reacting to what just happened,
or go up to him and be like hey, yeah.
He also said he did try to find me when
I ran away, but none of his family members knew
where I was. You know, she's still a minor. You
could have sent the police out if you were, like

(42:36):
I had no idea where she was. I had police.
My child went missing. It's been forty eight hours. Please help,
Like you could have done that, you didn't try at all.
He also said he did try to find me when
I ran away, but none of his family members knew
where I was. He said he didn't reach out to
my mom's side of the family because they cut him
off when dad married Karen. He just assumed I was

(42:58):
safe under my uncle's care and left it at that.
I told him I could have passed away in a ditch,
and he agreed, saying he had no excuse for that.
I asked him about the disowning part and once again
he is sorry and said it was because of anger
and Karen's poisonous words. I don't no, no, no, get out.
I asked him where he got my number and he

(43:20):
said Nana Grandma gave it to him. He said she
told him to make up with me and see if
I would let him walk me tell the isle. No, no, no,
So he tried to contact me about that. I asked
why he didn't apologize then, or at the very least
try to ask how I'm doing. He said he was
too prideful to apologize, but he said he did have

(43:42):
a friendly chat with me. I was thinking about this
the entire day, and I guess he did try to
be friendly. He's gaslighting you, girl, but I chalked it
up to him trying to build a relationship with me
so I'll feel bad and give him money. Nailed it.
I asked why he asked me for money then, and
he said he was desperate. He said he's been asking

(44:02):
everyone to contribute, but it's not enough. He heard from
Karen that my aunt said my wedding was big. Karen
thinks it would probably cost one hundred k plus. I
don't know where she got that money that number and
told him to ask if I was willing to contribute,
since twelve thousand dollars is a small percentage of that.
I didn't tell him what the cost of my wedding
would be, but I said that twelve thousand dollars is

(44:25):
more than half my budget and much has been deposited
to the venders. He said he's sorry for assuming. I
don't trust this man at all at all. I also
confronted him about him emotionally blackmailing everyone so they wouldn't
come to my wedding. He said the way I responded
before sounded condescending and insulting. I was disgusted, so my

(44:48):
voice might prefer that. So he got really angry. He
threw Karen under the bus, and Karen feeds his anger
and pushes him to do what he did. He apologized
for that and said caron out afterward for even suggesting
isolating me from everyone. He's such a liar, Like the
fact that he is blaming everything on his wife right

(45:12):
and not taking responsibility for anything. He's just like, oh, yeah, sorry,
I did that because she told me to. I can't
say no to.

Speaker 5 (45:21):
Her, but I can sell my ex wife's Yeah, I don't.

Speaker 2 (45:26):
Really care about my ex wife anymore, so that's fine.
I asked him if his threat still stands, and he
said not anymore. Everyone can come if they want and
he won't interfere. However, he begged me to help with
John's treatment if I could. He said what happened in
the past could not be changed, and I have every
right to be angry about that. Yet he said John

(45:48):
has grown to be a better man and deserves a
second chance. He said I can give him any amount
of money and he would be grateful. I said I
would think about it, and he said, thank you. I
was laying in my bed, I unable to sleep and
thinking about the conversation. Right now, I plan to give
a thousand dollars from my own savings account, separate from
my wedding and honeymoon to him and call it a day.

(46:11):
More than generous, very generous, Like I I mean, but
I also understand, like hear from someone who's like, yeah,
this my son is passing away from yah, like I
understand why Opie did this, but like, no more than that,
No more than that, because the thing is that even

(46:31):
now with all of the like Opie's Dad's posturing and like,
I don't know everything. Like all the conversations that they had,
it's very clear that he's doing this because he loves John.
He loves his stuff. Yeah, but he doesn't care about Opie.

Speaker 4 (46:46):
No.

Speaker 2 (46:46):
He sees ope as a way to like keep his
sons safe instead all for John. Yeah. Before doing that,
I wanted to consult both my fiance and uncle first though,
to see if they think that's the right thing to do. Well,
at least my grandparents can come without worries. Now, hopefully
this is the end to all the drama and there
is a second update. Do any thoughts before we jump

(47:08):
into that? Would you even want them at your wedding?

Speaker 5 (47:12):
Now? No?

Speaker 2 (47:12):
The grandparents were No, No I would not because they
were like have them walk them down the aisle? Yeah,
like what I would want, like the grandparents, Yeah, to
walk them down? Yeah. Update two. Hey everyone, this is
quicker than I expected, But I just want to say
my decision is final. No one from that family is

(47:33):
getting a penny. Oh okay, so OPI is doubled down.
Hans reached out to me through a throwaway account you
slash twelve thousand. Hans I confirm his identity. He knows Karen's,
John's dad's and my real name, and he knows what
I look like. He said he tried to post a
comment under this post twice, but I didn't get a notification,

(47:56):
so I don't know if Reddit is being weird. But
the import part is Hans told me everything. That man lied.
That man lied. I will not refer to him as
dad anymore because he doesn't deserve that title. Hans confirmed
that the man saw me on the floor. That's yeah,

(48:17):
first lie because he said, oh I didn't see I
didn't see that happen, and still chased after Karen. That
man lied about trying to find me after I ran away.
That one was obvious.

Speaker 3 (48:28):
We all knew that one.

Speaker 2 (48:30):
Hans said, no attempt had ever been made by him.
That man lied about John being a better man. He's
a man baby leeching off that man and Karen. That
man tried to manipulate me, and it almost worked. By
the way, you can work on listening to full episodes
of stories just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts,

(48:50):
or iHeartRadio and search up Okay, storytime, But there is
a little bit left to the story. Do you have
any final.

Speaker 5 (48:57):
Thoughts right now, it almost sounds like John is the
mastermind of it.

Speaker 2 (49:02):
Oh, like John's been working the strings the whole time.

Speaker 5 (49:06):
Hans is like, maybe it's not your dad, but like
John's been lying.

Speaker 2 (49:10):
Yeah. Well, I think all this whole family sucks except
for Hans. Hans kind of neutral. I think you need
to kind of cut these people off because they cut
you off. I think they need to stay gone. As
for the last update, that man took back his threats
and everyone could come. So I will use the one
thousand dollars I was about to give them and make
a matching outfit for anyone on my paternal side who

(49:31):
RSVPs for the wedding. I am going to take a
picture and make it into a Christmas card and send
it to everyone on that side of the family, including
them of course. Oh yeah, I will definitely tell them
everything before the RSVP deadline, to let them know what
a horrible human being that man and the step family
from Heck have been to me. The harmful actions, the lies,

(49:52):
and the manipulation.

Speaker 3 (49:54):
All of it.

Speaker 2 (49:55):
Lastly, thank you, all of you wonderful human beings. I
am shaking out of anger and relief right now. I'm
angry that once again I almost put myself second to
people who never appreciated me. I am relieved that this
finally ends and I don't have to waste my energy
thinking about this anymore. Love you all, goodbye. It seems
that Hans does have Sorry, John does have? Can you

(50:19):
think I didn't? It didn't say anything about the cancer,
so I guess he just like her dad, just lied
about everything else. So you think he doesn't have CAM No,
I think he doesn't. Think he does. Yeah, I think
that John, I like OPI is saying that her dad
was lying about like trying to be there for her
to get her to pay, which was pretty obvious. But

(50:39):
it does seem that John has which suck. Yeah, but
doesn't really have anything to do with you, Opie, because
they literally don't care about you at all, except for Hans.
I guess Hans. Hans come to the wedding. Yeah, maybe
you have a conversation with Hans and you're like, hey, Hans,
that was a so you did me a solid and

(51:02):
you can walk me down the aisle. No, I'm kind
of here for this Christmas card.

Speaker 3 (51:07):
Yes, that's able.

Speaker 2 (51:09):
No, it's great. I love it. I love everything that
was sorted out.

Speaker 1 (51:13):
Hey, it's Sam. We're gonna get back to these stories.
But here's three of us ads from our sponsors that
keep the show alive.

Speaker 2 (51:19):
My fiance's best friend confessed her love for him. I'm
disinviting her. Yeah that makes sense. I twenty three female,
and my fiance Elijah twenty eight male, are due to
get married at the end of next month at our
destination wedding. Ooh. Last night was my bachelorette party and
I invited my closest family and friends to come, along
with a few of my fiance's family and his friend

(51:41):
Cammy twenty seven female. By the way, this comes from
the Royal Glue and if you want to submit your
own stories, go to the r slash. Okay story time
separate it to force some backstory. I and my fiance
met when I was nineteen years old. Both of our
fathers are business partners and have been friends since I
was in high school. One night, his family invited mine
over for a party being held out at their home,
and that was the first time we met. I was

(52:02):
attracted to him, but I knew he was older, so
I didn't believe I had a chance. As the night progressed.
He was hanging outside in his backyard lone smoking, and
my sister dared me to go talk to him, so
I did, and a year later we began our relationship.
My fiance and Cammi have been friends since they were kids,
and their families are very close. She's always been extremely

(52:23):
nice towards me and wanted to be best friends. From
the first time we met. I found it a bit odd,
only because she barely knew me, but I didn't think
much of it because she had been dating my fiance's
best friend. Antonio twenty eight mal. We didn't become best
friends because I already have a close friend group and
I don't trust easily. But she's always been cool and
never crossed any boundaries. Last summer, my fiance proposed to

(52:44):
me on a trip to Belize. When the announcement was made,
everyone sent their congratulatory praises to us, but Cammy. She
sent a text the next day to my fiance only
not our friend group chat, saying she was happy for him.
She was a bit stand offish to me since then,
but again I never paid attention really because I have
my own friends in life. About six months ago, Antonio

(53:05):
and Cammy broke up, but never really stated the reason why,
just that they wanted to go back to being friends
and be happy with other people. Fast forward to last night.
My bachelorette was in a suite at a popular hotel
here in Miami where I live. Planned by my older
sister and Eli's sister Ava, twenty six female. The night
was amazing and I truly had the time of my life.

(53:25):
We were all getting wasted and I decided to go
to the bathroom, and when I got closer, I heard
voices and whimpering like someone was crying. It was then
I heard Cammy tell Ava that this should be her
and that she doesn't understand why he would want to
be with someone like me when it was always supposed
to be them two together, that she always loved him.
I sobered the heck up instantly. I might have to

(53:48):
do a part two. But guys, tell me, would I
be the a hole for disinviting her from my wedding
when it's a month away? Relevant comment says commoner one says,
take a breath and think for a moment. Don't unilaterally
decide not to invite her, or you'll drive a wedge
between you and your fiance talk to his sister first,
confirm what you heard, see how she plays it off.
Talk to your fiance, tell him what you overheard and

(54:10):
ask him to ask his sister to have confirmation. Then
go from there as a whole. Not the ale. Common
Er two says, not the ale, but you have to
talk to your fiance. Tell him exactly what you heard.
Make sure to emphasize that you didn't have any problem
whatsoever with her or their friendship, but that now that
you know that her feelings are not the same as
a friend, then you need him to have boundaries with her,

(54:30):
and you don't feel comfortable with her being at the
wedding and all this time she didn't want to be
a supportive friend but instead the bride. Commoner three says,
this is certainly an awkward and difficult situation. I think
you should speak to your fiance about it and go
from there. If she can't be an actual friend and
supportive of you both, then she should remove herself from
the situation. If she's not over him or having issues

(54:51):
of jealousy, definitely not someone you want being in distraction
at your wedding. Commonar four says you need to talk
to your fiance. Their friendship needs to end. Sits out
there like that. There is no coming back from this.
The two of you need to be on the same
page or hold off the wedding. Do not marry him
if he won't end his friendship with someone who confessed
to his sister that she's in love with him. Also again,

(55:12):
crazy that she confessed to his sister, right, do you
think the sister knew? Maybe like besties. I think if
someone confessed that they were in love with my brother, yeah,
I'd like go to my brother immediately. Immediately, I'd be like, hey, dude,
there have been multiple people that like Sam knows who
have told me things about him or like said things

(55:33):
about him or something, And I'm like, why are you
like talking to me about my brother. We gonna tell
him she told her because she wants her to tell
him and for him to choose her. That's not okay.
He needs to be the one to uninvite her, not
the ale And there is an update two days later. Wow,
thank you to everyone who has given me advice and
reached out to me in my messages. You guys are amazing.

(55:55):
Before I get into this update, at the Reddit hero
count your freaking days. I was minding my business scrolling
down TikTok and saw my story lool. For some clarification,
I referred to Cammy as my fiance's best friend because
I didn't know what else to call her. Maybe childhood friend.
I don't know, but they have never went out of
their way to call each other that. But that's how

(56:16):
I see them. Now for the update. After I heard
what was said, the old me started to revert back,
and I almost caused a scene. But I knew with
my siblings, cousins and friends all being there, it would
get out of control, and I still wanted to enjoy
my night, but I did continue to listen. Some of
you were wondering what Ava to say about all this.
After Ava was able to calm Cammy down, she explained

(56:37):
to her that this was not the time and place
and that Elijah would never forgive her if she ruined
my bachelorette party. She also told her that she thinks
that she should leave and get herself together. I was
about to walk in now at the same time they
were walking out. I acted as if I didn't hear
anything and asked if everything was okay. Cammy just wiped
her face, looked down, stating that she wasn't feeling well

(56:58):
and that she might have to cut the night show.
I honestly didn't fight her on it, and even walked
her butt to the door because the f After she left,
I pulled Ava to the side, telling her that I
heard everything. She apologized that I heard it and said
that she would reach out to Eli to handle it.
Some of you also wanted to know why Cammy said
it should have been heart Did her and My accept

(57:19):
something going on before? I knew they hadn't, but needed
to be sure, so I asked if they had ever
been together or dated. In response, Ava said not that
she was aware of, only that their moms would always
joke around when they were teens, saying they could finally
be related once Eli and Cammy got married. She said
that never happened because Eli was never into her. Cammy

(57:40):
is a gorgeous girl, but my fiance does have a
certain type and it's not her. Respectfully, I wanted to
ask more questions, but I thought I'd wait until I
spoke with my fiance for further answers. After that, I
continued the party and even spoke with Eli quickly before
bet I posted on Reddit the next day after I
got home, before I did anything drastic. My fiance came

(58:02):
home later that evening, and once he settled in and relaxed,
I told him everything that happened. To say that he
was irate is taking it lightly. He was absolutely furious.
I asked if there was anything between them that I
was never told about. I asked if they had ever
been intimate and if she had ever confused her love
for him before. He made it clear that there had

(58:23):
never been anything but a friend's relationship in his eyes.
He said that they had never had spicy sleep before,
but did kiss once back in high school playing Spin
the Bottle games, but he was in a group and
everyone kissed multiple people, including Antonio. He said that she
has never confessed her love for him and is confused
because he's the only one that played a role in
Antonio and her dating. You wanted to call her right

(58:45):
then and there, but I told him to calm down first,
because being upset would only make things worse. I want
to say that my fiance isn't mad that I heard it,
or is trying to hide anything. He's upset because he
feels hurt and betrayed that she would do this to
him and at my party when we were all there
to support me. My fiance can get really protective of
me at times. He doesn't like to hear anything negative.

(59:05):
I did express to him that I feel uncomfortable with
her going to her wedding now. I want people at
her wedding who are genuinely happy and supportive of us. Tonight,
he texted her saying that he needs to speak with her.
She replied saying she'll let him know when she's home,
so we'll see how tonight's conversation goes. You also invited
Antonio over for dinner. Ooh, that's gonna be an awkward conversation, like,
oh yeah, your ex girlfriend left you for me, and

(59:29):
we'll speak to him about what's going on because things
feel off. A lot of you were also questioning hers
and Antonio's relationship and if she used him to make
Eli jealous. So we will all be present when the
conversation does happen to see what she has to say
her herself. Since Thanksgiving is in a few days, I
will update you guys on how the conversation goes and

(59:50):
if anything new comes to light, just give me some
time to get through this holiday. Also, I have a
wedding dress fitting tomorrow and I'm so excited. I might
make a collage and show you guys reference photos. XO xo.
And there are some comments. Scolner one says, whatever happens,
don't let it happen, and just be careful that this
friend situation hurts the most beautiful moment of your life.

(01:00:11):
You and your fiance came from a long journey to
get to this point, so enjoy and don't let her
steal this from you. Opie says exactly, this is a
happy moment for me and him. I will definitely enjoy.
And there is an update. So now we're, you know
a little bit like we got fifteen days left before
this wedding. Oh my god. Yeah, not all the time. Yeah,
hopefully Opie've acted quickly.

Speaker 5 (01:00:30):
I wonder if she was like showing up to this
dinner with OPI's fiance being like, oh my god, he's
like totally gonna confess his love for me tonight.

Speaker 2 (01:00:40):
Oh wait the friend Yeah, because I don't think he
was like we need to like talk tonight. He was
just like, oh hey, you need to talk. That's a
good point. She started thinking, which is crazy because she
literally told his sister, right, but she wanted op over hers. Yeah.
But also I'm thinking maybe she wanted the sister to

(01:01:00):
tell him.

Speaker 5 (01:01:01):
Wouldn't she say, like, you have to tell your brother
for me so that he can like or was she
just like.

Speaker 2 (01:01:06):
Oh, I thought that was I thought she was saying,
I'll tell him. I thought the sister was saying to
ope that she was like, oh, yeah, I'll tell him. Yeah,
but yeah, maybe she wants Eva to tell Yeah, so
she could think that just the sister told yeah, and
she's like, oh, now he's coming to tell me that
he's in love with me actually getting married in fifteen days.
Ooh yeah. She's like, I'm gonna take their wedding. Yeah.

(01:01:27):
It's kind of a Mumma mea situation, except instead of
an entirely different couple, it's just replacement person. Update too
thirteen days later, I'm pasting the edit from my previous update.
My younger brother sixteen, Mail was in a car accident
Thanksgiving night where he was injured. Thankfully, he's okay with
just a sprain wrist and a concussion. The other driver

(01:01:48):
passed away as he was speeding This has been a
lot to digest, but things seem to be calming down now.
I will have an update for you guys by the morning.
Bear with me. There's a lot to update you guys on,
so it will be a brand new past. It's actually
Monday evening now, but let's get into this long update.
So that night, we ended up inviting Antonio over and
basically told him everything that happened up to that point.

(01:02:09):
He actually wasn't shocked at all by the news and
stated that one of the main reasons why they broke
up was because he felt like Cammy pulled away after
hearing about the engagement. He never said anything because he
didn't want to cause any issues between my fiance and meet.
My husband said she did become distant as well, but
of course we have our own lives we've been planning for,
so it honestly wasn't high on his priority list that

(01:02:31):
would have made him address it then. Well, of course
now we know why, so we wanted to address it
to her now. About thirty minutes later, Cammy texted Eli
that she was home and would call once she was
settled in. When she did call, before she could even
say hello, my fiance started. He asked her why she
thought it was okay to go to my bachelorette party
and say that she loves him and that he should

(01:02:52):
be with her instead of me. He asked her why
she would ever think it's okay to also bring it
up to his sister and get her. She was taken
aback and asked what he was talking about, which pissed
him off. He told her that I heard what she
told Ava in the bathroom and that she was out
of line to even suggest that they had ever been
anything more than a family friendship. She said she couldn't

(01:03:14):
help how she feels and that being at a bachelorette
party made it real for her and she just needed
to get it off her chest and thought she could
trust Ava. He asked her why, if all this time
she had feelings for him, would she be with Antonio
when he set them up. Cammy said she thought that
things wouldn't get serious between them and thought eventually that
he would come around. Said that she would give hints

(01:03:35):
but he would never reciprocate, which should have been a
hint to her. He told her that although they've had
a long friendship, this was something that he couldn't look
past and that she is no longer invited to the wedding.
He told her that he would assist her in any
returns or refunds that she would need for any money
spend so far. Cammy was upset and said that she
didn't mean for me to hear what she said, and
that she was never going to make any problems for us.

(01:03:56):
I mean she already did. She already did say it
out loud to his sister, made a problem. He said
it didn't matter that we were only inviting people to
the wedding that love and support our relationship, and that
her actions show that she didn't. And he then started
talking crap about me, saying that I think that I'm
all that and that I believe I'm better than her.
Eli cut her off and said, I don't think that

(01:04:18):
I'm all that, but if she believes that I'm better
than her, then she should evaluate her own insecurities and
work on that. He then hung up. Antonio and I
were so shocked all we could do was laugh. She
clearly has always felt this way about me, but was
faking it to my face. I don't even know why
she would think those things about me as She's older
than me and more successful. I'm still beginning my career

(01:04:39):
and not even where I want to be to even
believe I'm better than anyone. I'm just living my life
and going with the flow. After the phone call, we
all just discussed what happened eight and then Antonio left.
He really didn't have any feelings towards the issue because
he's now seeing someone else and has moved on from
the situation, stating that she needs help. The next day
was the day before Thanksgiving, and since my family he

(01:05:00):
was hosting Thanksgiving dinner, Eli's parents had a small gathering
at their home for their immediate family and friends. Me
and my fiance were invited, including his sister, her husband, Cammy,
and his family. I really didn't know what to expect
when getting ready to go there, because I knew it
would be awkward seeing Cammy in person after the argument
the night before. My fiance didn't say anything, but I

(01:05:20):
could tell he was still upset about everything. When we
got to the party, everyone was already pretty much there
except a few people. Before we even sat down or
spoke to everyone, Eli told his family that he had
something to say. Cammy was setting off to the side,
with her parents and brother not wanting to engage. He
began saying that since it's close to the wedding, he
might as well announce to everyone that if they do

(01:05:41):
not love and support us getting married, they would be
permanently disinvited from the wedding. His mom asked where this
was coming from, and everyone was nervously looking around. That's
so funny, he told her. Apparently there are people in
this house that I'm an issue with him being engaged,
and that those people won't be allowed to attend. I'm
guessing Cammy had already told old her parents would happen,
because then her mom started to speak. She said that

(01:06:03):
she thought it was tasteless to disinvite her daughter to
the wedding after how long they had been close. Eli responded,
saying that he thought it was tasteless for her daughter
to go to his fiance's bachelorette party, saying that it
should have been hers. Mic drop. At this point, everyone
was shocked, including me, because I had no idea he
was going to address it to his family. They started

(01:06:24):
to argue back and forth, with Avea's dad getting involved.
Eli was having none of it and said that none
of them would be invited, except for Cammy's brother, who
wasn't agreeing with what his sister had done. Cammy's family
ended up leaving shortly after the confrontation. Eli's mom was
shocked and hurt about everything that happened, but supported us.
She said she would speak with her friend and that
she felt it was all inappropriate. I apologized to her

(01:06:46):
and Eli's dad, saying that I hated that this happened
and that it is causing a rift. She and Ava
told me I have nothing to be sorry about and
that they all were on our side. Cammy ended up
sending both Eli and Ava very long, nasty messages about
how they weren't loyal to her and that I was
purposely causing a divide between the two because I wanted
to punt her out of the family and sabotage that relationship.

(01:07:07):
This woman is delusional, so my fiance just blocked her.
She then texts to be saying that me and Eli's
relationship wouldn't last very long if I became jealous of
every woman important in his life. I blocked her as well.
I may be a lot of things, but jealous isn't
one of them. I'm happy and very secure my relationship. Honestly,
seeing how far he's willing to go to make sure

(01:07:28):
that my day is perfect. His words, not mine, just
solidify to me more than ever that I'm marrying the
right person. Thanksgiving was amazing and we had a good
time with the family. Sadly, that night is when my
brother got into his accident, so we had to deal
with that. Everything is now starting to calm down and
now me and my fiance can relax until next week.
Then we leave for Palermo, Italy, where the wedding will be.

(01:07:50):
I forgot they were having a destination there. That's what
he paid her back for too.

Speaker 1 (01:07:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:07:55):
I may update you guys in the future, but for
now this will be the final update. I'm willing to
answer any other questions you guys may have for me
in the comments, and there are some relevant comments. This
seems like an overreaction, given that Cammy was already distancing
herself and never said anything. I think you and your
fiance are full of yourselves, dang, like the speech was unnecessary.
Telling others was unnecessary. Yes, you and your fiance escalated

(01:08:17):
things and you talked like you should have beat her
on or something. When you eavesdropped on a private conversation.
She admitted she was jealous and struggling. She didn't do
anything to you anyways. You two drama queens. You and
your fiance deserve each other weird as. There's more to
the story that I left out. I didn't go into
detail on what she put in the long messages she
sent to my fiance and his sister. But this is

(01:08:38):
not an overreaction. This girl has been smiling in my face,
acting like my friend, wanting to be best friends, knowing
the whole time she had feelings for my fiance. Yes,
maybe my fiance could have handled it a little better.
I've already spoken to him about it, but he won't
apologize for what he said. He meant every last word.
I won one hundred percent back my fiance and how

(01:08:58):
he chose to handle her and her parents. I don't
want anyone around me who's secretly jealous of me. Those
people are dangerous and cannot be trusted. I may be young,
but I have sisters and close friends around me who
I trust and have been in my life for over
ten years. I don't need, nor do I want, fake
love and support celebrating with me on my wedding night.
I didn't center myself at all. I didn't know how

(01:09:21):
my fiance was going to take the news. Yet I
don't think op he knew that the fiance was going
to call them out yeah Thanksgiving. I think she was
pretty surprised as well. He's normally the calm and thoughtful one.
I think he really just felt blindsided and thought I
would leave him, so he just wanted to set things
straight before any other problems. The wedding is slowly approaching.
We're both just super anxious and just trying to take
in as many happy moments that we can. Bottom of form.

(01:09:44):
Commoner two says, Yes, she always gave me pick me vibes.
She always hung out with just guys. Her only real
girlfriend was Atha. It always felt like she was trying
too hard when she came around all the girls. Comminer
three says, judging my Cammi's mother's first reaction being to
blame your fiance for the disinvitation, it's not hard to
find the source of Cammy's behavior. Those two probably have

(01:10:04):
the same thought process too. I would advise security for
your wedding just to avoid some further avoidable drama. Never
think too high of some people. Also glad that your
brother is okay. Like the other had said, keep an
eye on him because no one knows when the trauma
will surface. And there is a final update addressing the comments,
I'm here to clear some things up. My fiance did
not address the issue at Thanksuing dinner. The night before Thanksgiving,

(01:10:27):
his parents had a small get together at their home
that included me, my fiance, Ava, Ava's husband's Cammi, Cammy's brother,
and parents. There was also another couple that was on
the way who are friends of my in laws. When
we arrived, the couple hadn't arrived yet, so the confrontation
did not have been in front of them, only our
two families. I already spoke with my husband regarding his

(01:10:48):
actions that night and told him I felt like things
could have been handled a lot more privately. Once he
was able to calm down about the whole situation, he
also agreed. I just wanted to say that this is
not something that my fiance did all the time. He's sweet, kind,
caring and loving, so seeing people call him aggressive for
standing up for me is battling. This morning, I expressed

(01:11:08):
to my fiance that I think that he should apologize.
He called Cammy this morning, telling her that although he
does not regret anything he said, he could have handled
the situation maturely. The conversation went absolutely nowhere because all
she was trying to do was get him to change
his mind, telling him that it's not too late to
cancel the wedding. She took that as him being like,
I'm in love with you. Yeah, honestly, I'm over it, guys.

(01:11:29):
It's starting to drain me and my happiness. Ava has
also apologized to Cammy and also expressed to her that
she had no idea she was going to be put
on blast at dinner. I don't know and do not
care what happens with their friendship from there. I won't
be going out of my way to be involved disrespectfully.
For those of you believe that I'm the mean girl
and that I like drama, kindly kiss my butt. Someone

(01:11:49):
in the comments told me I won and that I
got the man. WTF is this? Are you truly okay?
My fiance isn't the prize. I will never fight over
man and go out of my way to be mean
to another woman over a man I actually liked Cammi
which is why she was even invited to my Bachelor
red party. No we weren't super close. No she wasn't
a bridesmaid, but she was cool enough to celebrate with me.

(01:12:12):
She always wanted to be the center when it came
to the boys or getting attention, not me. Before this,
there hasn't really been any drama. Drama actually causes me
high anxiety and it sprinkles to depression. But you know what,
I do enjoy you guys listening to full episodes with
stories just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts,
or iHeartRadio and search up Okay Storytime. In case some

(01:12:33):
of you didn't realize, everyone's names is changed for the
sake of concealing our identities. Thank you, guys for all
the love and supportive messages to my little brother. He's
doing okay and he's being watched carefully as we are
aware that some injuries can show up after the accident.
For my mental health, I think this will be my
last update. I thought I would update you guys for
the wedding, but these mean comments take away that fun.

(01:12:55):
I truly appreciate everyone who has left kind messages for me.
You guys have truly put a smile on my face,
and that is the end of that story.

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}I let my step daughter wear BLACK to a wedding… my wife got furious! | Reddit Stories