I met someone from a Dating App… and then he swindled my father! - r/TwoHotTakes | Reddit Stories - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Sam. This is John, the og story
Time packcast host. Oh yeah, and we got some great
stories coming up. But before that we get a teeny
two minute break from the sponsors that keep this show
propped up like a little house.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
Oh you, I met someone from a dating app and
then he swindled my father. What This is a weird
way to get your parents involved in your dating life. I,
thirty two female, am a registered nurse in southern California.
The individual thirty five male, who I will refer to
as Henry, stated that he worked as an er doctor
at a large hospital in Los Angeles and went to

(00:33):
USC kech for medical school. By the way, this comes
from angro Wica on the Okay Storytime Separated. So we
met on the dating app Hinge in June of twenty
twenty four, and we dated since then up until the
end of September twenty twenty four. The victims in my
story are myself my father, who is eighty years old.
This man primarily targets healthcare workers, specifically nurses, but it

(00:55):
could be anyone Besides our very similar occupations. Henry and
I shared many common interests and I quickly fell in
love with this man as I had believed he did
with me. We both liked camping, traveling, off roading, and
our boats of Latino Hispanic. He was very loving, honest
about his past and struggles, and we spent a lot
of time together. We grew very close, very quickly, and
it really seemed like I had found my other half.

(01:17):
His love and affection was obvious to me and everyone
around me, so much so that when he took me
on a vacation that he paid for to Mexico, a
random couple walked up to us to compliment how lovely
of a couple we were and how much we could
tell this man was in love with me. Everything seemed
great until about one month in, when it seemed like
all of the sudden in his life was giving him

(01:38):
a constant streak of bad luck. His dad broke his arm,
which was important since his dad owns a roofing business.
One of Henry's investments that he shared with his dad
had gone south. We still had fun together, and while
I see now that this was a super red flag,
I didn't feel like I was in danger to the
point that I needed to leave the relationship, since it
was great in many other ways. Though I felt he
had some anger problems he needed to go to therapy

(01:59):
to work out. I felt like it was something that
could be managed, as we always got through whatever issues
we had. I know now that this anger was just
a form of him gaslighting me in order to manipulate
me and make me stick around. I eventually introduced him
to my parents, who quickly became enamored with him too,
and everything just continued as it was since I first
met him. Henry always spoke about his plans of someday

(02:20):
opening up an urgent care so that he could one
day retire early and be able to spend time with
his future family and kids. He spoke how great it
would be if that was something that we we could
open up together, given our similar occupations. I told him
I had plans to eventually return to a school to
become a nurse practitioner, and he said that he would
support me every day he could so that I could
accomplish this goal of mine. Henry was very ambitious and

(02:42):
seemed like a hardworking person who had traversed a lot
of difficulty to get to the point to where he
is now. He knew all of the right things to
say to make me fall for him. It seemed like
a beyond perfect match, both romantically and professionally, given that
he was a doctor and I am a nurse. I
don't like that doctor is a quotes there. Oh no,
but I mean we can all kind of assume where

(03:03):
this is going. Fast forward a few months into my
relationship with this guy, there were things that made me
question if he really was a doctor or if all
of his stories were true. When someone lies, eventually things
just start to not add up. He always had some
type of financial crisis come up that would cause him stress,
and he used this to rationalize the verbal abuse he
would eventually put me through later in the relationship. Oh no,

(03:25):
that's so stupid, because like there's literally nothing that's gonna
rationalize that. Like I understand, you know, if you get
angry sometimes you can you can have a moment where
you need to express the anger, but you can't express
it on another person. If you need to be like, hey,
I need to rant for a second loved one, you know,
whoever your partner is like and I'm going I'm gonna

(03:46):
get loud. It's not about you. Then like you can
maybe make that work, depending on if your partner's okay
with that or not. But like, if you are just
stressed about work or something like that, you can't, like,
you can't yell at your partner. I don't know. I
don't stand for it. I don't think people should stand
for it. I do know that some people are like,
weirdly okay with it. I don't understand that, but but

(04:10):
here we are. But he didn't always ask me for
money or for his financial issues, which is why I
thought maybe he was just being open about his hard
time he was going through. I tried my best to
listen and be supportive, but it didn't seem to make
a difference. Behind my back, he developed a very close
relationship with both of my parents, where he would have
several phone calls multiple times per week explaining not only
how much he loved me, but also that I could

(04:31):
be a difficult and non supportive partner at times. By
doing this, he was able to get my parents against me,
and this was demonstrated by the fact that on numerous
occasions I told my parents I wanted to break up
with him because he had anger issues. This is intense, man, dang.
Whenever I mentioned breaking up with him, my parents defended him,
saying that he was the ultimate catch of a man

(04:51):
and that I needed to do whatever it took to
make this relationship work because I would not find another
man like him. Oh my gosh, this is so hard
to listen to because what like, because so many abusive relationships,
what they do is they pit you against your partner
like everyone else in your life, and they're like, no,
I'm not the problem. Everyone else is the problem here.

(05:11):
But what this is like, I've never heard of a
story like this where they are this the partner, the
abusive partner is like like contacting everyone else in the
relationship besides OPE and pitting them against Ope. That like,
is not something I've ever heard of, and that's insane.
This not only made it very difficult for me to
leave the relationship, but also made me question if I

(05:33):
was truly as supportive and good to him as I
thought I was being. This manipulation by him onto my parents'
emotions directly influenced me to stay in the relationship. I
eventually found out the truth about this man after he
decided to add me as a user onto his sleep
Number bed phone app to control my side of the
bed at his apartment. I woke up on a Saturday
at my home and something just told me to open
this app. There must have been some kind of update,

(05:55):
because previously I could only see my side of the bed.
To those unfamiliar, this app is super specific about when
you are in bed, if you're peacefully or restfully sleeping,
and when you get up, et cetera. Oh no, I
don't like where this is going. I see us in
the chat. I hate this, Oh my gosh. On this day,
I opened up the app, looked at his profile and

(06:15):
saw that for the entire time since I had met
this guy, he had never woken up before nine am.
He claimed to work Monday through Friday five am to
five thirty pm. So this already did not add up.
My heart sank and I knew at that point that
all the suspicion I had in my heart about this
man was all true. He was lying about everything. I
told my friends to run a background check while I

(06:37):
went to his house one last time on a weekday
where he and I both worked the next day to
see what he would do. He told me that he
had asked his coworker doctor to stay extra on the
night shift so he could come in at seven, meaning
we would leave for work around the same time. So
the next day we both woke up around five forty
five to start getting ready. He got up, put his
scrubs on, put his badge on, made breakfast, and we

(06:59):
both went to work. I was about to ask, where
is he getting like this official like uniform and all
this stuff. But I mean, the internet has everything, so
I guess I guess he could easily do that. That
is just so much effort to be like scamming someone
like I'm that's insane. Oh my goodness, this storyline is
gonna give me trust is shoes, Sorry, Riley. He asked

(07:19):
me to text him when I got to work, which
was around six forty five. I did, and I asked
about his drive. See you know that he's asking just
to know that when the coast is clear and he
can go back home. He replied he had made it
to work safe, but that there was a lot of
fog that morning, which there was. He wished me a
good day and said that he would text me later.
I opened up the sleep number app, which also tells
you when you are laying in bed, and lo and behold,

(07:41):
I open it and that's exactly what it says. He's
currently in the bed, but texting me that he just
got to work. Wow, that's a crazy way to find
out someone's lying about that and possibly cheating. I feel
like he's cheating, but I don't know. I got to
work and started my shift and disbelieve of what had
just happened. And this man was lying to me the

(08:04):
entire time. I mentioned that I had asked my friends
to run a background check that night I was with him,
and they found a ton I'm so scared. Not only
did the background check reveal that Henry has no medical license,
but he has been taken to court for everything from
child support cases he claims to have no children, to
check forgery and car insurance fraud. We found several cases

(08:26):
where he has been taken to court by banks, credit
card companies, and for car repossessions. I told my parents
to stop talking to him completely because he was lying
about his profession, his life, and everything. He was. At
this point that my dad let out that he had
lent this man over sixty thousand dollars two months prior.

(08:48):
Oh my god, sixty thousand dollars to this poor man,
this poor eighty year old man, he's like his retirement fund.
Oh my gosh. I completely lost it and asked to
go home early because I couldn't absorb everything that was
happening to me. Henry literally kept me around to get

(09:08):
money out of my dad, who is eighty years old
and very vulnerable to something like this, and he knew
that he was. This is so sad. Behind my back
and without my knowledge, this man manipulated my elderly father
into lending him sixty two thousand, five hundred dollars under
the false pretenses that he would be using this money
as a down payment on an urgent care? On an

(09:31):
urgent care? Is he buying an urgent care because he
was certain that I was the woman of his dreams
and that he wanted to spend the rest of his
life with me. Oh my goodness. I guess maybe, like
if op was like opening an urgent care or something.
She mentioned something like that, I'm not a remembering the
exact details, but you can go back and find it,
So I guess I guess that makes sense then why
he would like explain it, because like, I feel like

(09:52):
it wouldn't make sense for the dad to like lend
him sixty two thousand dollars, like if this was his dream,
you know, but if he's like, you know, this is
like for your daughter, Like I want to make everything
happen for our livers so much, all the while, like
you know, talking her well, talking her down, talking himself up.
And so the dad is probably like, well, this would
be money for my daughter pretty much, And oh my gosh,

(10:15):
that is just so insane. He showed my father a
fake paperwork of a property in North Hollywood that he
was planning to buy for the urgent care and photos
of her ring he was eventually going to propose to
me with. He told my parents that his parents were
also on board with us getting married, and that they
were selling some property in Mexico to pay for the
down payment of the urgent care. What so he's saying

(10:36):
that his own parents are also paying for the ursient care. However,
because they were selling property and it would take some
time to get the money, he wanted to know if
he could borrow some of the money with the promises
to pay it back so that this plan could be
put into motion for us to get married in the
next two years. Ah, I would throw up if I
was Opie, if I learned all of this information. This

(10:59):
is not over that there's still more to this insane story.
But if I learned all of this about my partner,
who I thought loved me, you know I would.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
I would.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
I want to throw up just thinking about it. Oh
my goodness, this is insane. This urgent care was going
to be both a surprise as well as someday a
wedding gift to me because he would make me half owner.
My dad was beyond nabord with this idea and believed
his words in fake papers. Henry successfully manipulated my father
into not telling me about the money loan because this
was all going to be one big surprise to me.

(11:31):
My dad, being eighty years old and only wanting best
for his only child, believed him and gave him the money,
all while not telling me a single word. So now
I know that Henry never loved me, never told me
the truth, and used his anger to gaslight me constantly
to not only make me question myself, but also feel
even worse and even crazy for questioning him. Him paying

(11:54):
and treating me to nice dinners and a few vacations
was done to make me believe that he was as
successful of a person as he has claimed. When I ask
my father why he gave him the money since we
had not been dating that long, Why he didn't tell me,
why did he do any of it? My dad just
responded with tears in his eyes that he loved me
and thought he was doing the best for me. That

(12:15):
makes me want to cry. Oh my gosh, this is
so sad. Oh my gosh. My only hope going like
reading through this story is that the way she's reflecting
on it seems like she has a very clear understanding
of what has happened, which is great. I mean, it
hurts to hear, but like it's great because it sounds

(12:37):
like she's hopefully in therapy and processing everything that has happened.
Like admitting that someone like never loved you after a
relationship with all this crazy stuff that's happening, that is
hard to admit to yourself, you know what I mean.
So I am just hoping that that what I'm thinking
is true is that she is gone therapy and that

(12:58):
she is working on it and she is moving on
and she's finding better people in her life. Hopefully slow process,
but it'll happen. This person successfully manipulated me and my
family in almost every way a person could. When I
confronted him about the truth and everything I knew, even
providing him with evidence of what I was saying, Henry
denied it all. Of course he is. Of course he's

(13:20):
gonna deny it all. He's been lying this whole time.
He even had the nerve to tell me that he
did seriously love me and did want a life and
children with me, and that it was sad that I
had decided to make up this whole story in my mind,
ruining it for the both of us. Henry denied my
father ever lending him money, though there is a written
contract between them with his signature that this did happen,

(13:43):
and he eventually ghosted me. It has now been a
little over one month since this happened, and neither my
dad nor I have heard anything from him. Oh my gosh,
there is still more to the story. I really hope
that we're going to see some sort of like solution
to this really really, really bad But I also hope
that you watch more stories just like this. Just go

(14:04):
to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or whatever your favorite podcast app
is and just search Okay, story time, We've got lots
of stories like this and a lot of times some
happier ones with better endings. But nevertheless, we have not
gotten to the ending of this, so let's continue. Henry
took advantage of me and my family emotionally, financially, and

(14:25):
completely ruined my trust in people. He is an extreme
professional at what he does and knows exactly what to
say to take advantage of good, honest women and their families.
For everything I questioned, he always had an answer. For
many months, I believed in him, though my instincts knew
better and was telling me not to. So now I
am left here just trying to move on with my life.
I'm posting my story in hopes that maybe someone is

(14:48):
going through something similar and can learn from it. I
have since encountered multiple women who have shared stories very
similar to mine. My hopes are to start a podcast
where women can share their stories so others can learn
from them and so that people going through something similar
can realize that they are not alone. Thank you for reading,
and that is the end of that. My dynamic with
my boyfriend is toxic. I finally see the truth.

Speaker 3 (15:12):
Looks like someone needs to get out of there.

Speaker 2 (15:13):
Hi, redd it. I would really like some advice if
you guys have any I'm sorry if this seems a
little messy. I'm writing this at work. A little background.
My boyfriend twenty two and I twenty three have been
together for three years, just recently six months long distance
for him to go to school because his dad said
that he would pay for it. By the way, this
comes from toe Tethers on the r slash logo storytime
Separate It. I'm always trying to support what my boyfriend does.

(15:35):
He doesn't like his dad, and I offered to take
on more clients at work to help him pay for
school if he didn't want to rely on his dad,
but he thought it would be easier to move states
for his dad to pay. It's been a bit of
a rocky road for us. When we've gotten into arguments
or when I've brought up my feelings, it's always you're
straight up mean to me, and why are your feelings
so much about you? And what makes the relationship so bad?

(15:57):
What do I need to do? It would always end
up in me apologizing and changing my behavior so that
I don't make him upset, and I've gotten to the
point where I'm very closed off towards him. After an argument.
It was either I should act a certain way or
my boyfriend would be overly kind, and messages were very
lovey dovey until I did something wrong again love bombing exactly.

(16:19):
That's tall or sure signs of a toxic or abusive
relationship to high highs and low lows. Get it out
of there, girl. I also would like to add that
my boyfriend wants to FaceTime every night through the entire night,
like to sleep on call every night. He also had
me cut ties with all of my male friends because
they're guys. That's reason enough. I hate it when people

(16:39):
do that. Yeah, that's so ridiculous, Like why why you
even do that? That's so ridiculous because like I went
on two dates with one guy that wanted me to
do that, like right off the bat, like cut off
guy friends. Oh wow, Yeah, he didn't want me to
do it yet, but he was like, if this turned
into anything, that's what I'm gonna expect of you. And
I was like, okay, so listen, I'm bisexual. Does that

(16:59):
mean I have to have no friend for her?

Speaker 3 (17:01):
And she talks to so many girls it's kind of crazy.

Speaker 2 (17:03):
Well, yeah, because they're my friends, but they are. But
like that just doesn't make sense at all, because it's like, what,
am I just not gonna have any friends? And it's
just it's just such a silly, silly, silly willy thing.

Speaker 4 (17:20):
Because if you can't trust your partner who's of the
opposite sex to be with their version of the opposite
sex or whoever they're attracted to, do you really need
to be.

Speaker 2 (17:29):
If you don't trust someone, you shouldn't be together exactly,
absolutely not, Like you're not gonna change if you don't
trust someone, you're not going to change them into someone
you do trust. Yeah, So anyway, Yeah.

Speaker 3 (17:39):
But am I gonna put my girlfriend in a room
with Vi and Caitlin?

Speaker 1 (17:43):
Uh No, I'm not.

Speaker 3 (17:43):
I'm gonna try to avoid that at all.

Speaker 2 (17:45):
Possible, probably for the best. Let me clarify the one
guy friend that I had already been friends with for
four years previously. He would always help me when I
would move. My daddy even considers him a close family friend.
My boyfriend just didn't understand that my friend and his
friendship was My birthday was earlier this month, and my
childhood friend that lives in a different state just had
a baby two weeks ago and was able to mail

(18:07):
me a birthday card. My boyfriend told me that he
went shopping the day before my birthday and bought me
a nice shirt at Zoomi's and told me that he
would give it to me the next time we see
each other. About two weeks ago, when I finally brought
up all the stuff that had been bothering me, I
told my boyfriend that I needed time and space to
figure things out. I told him no calling that night,
and I woke up to a bunch of messages from
my boyfriend saying that he misses me and loves me

(18:29):
back to FaceTime calls during the night. The next day,
I brought up my friend that he made me stop
talking to and he says, you can talk to whoever
you want. I also brought up how I was hurt
that he said that I mean to him when I
was just trying to explain my feelings. That he told
me that he was sorry and then he was just
in a bad mood. You know. I saw something recently

(18:52):
that said like, if he couldn't speak, would you fall
in love with his actions? And I thought that was
a really good one.

Speaker 1 (18:59):
Dude.

Speaker 4 (19:00):
You know what else are saw that's kind of like
kind of like in that version is would you want
miniature versions of them to exist in this world? Like
would you like, would you want this man to have children?
Or would you want this person to have children just
like them?

Speaker 2 (19:15):
Absolutely? Like yeah, would you? Or something that I've thought
of too is like it's like if you're if you're
with someone, like would you want would you want your
future children with this person? If that were to happen,
know that they were treating you that way and for
that to be like an okay example, like that he

(19:35):
was treating me this way, but it's okay we stayed
together because then they would repeat the same thing. Yeah,
you know what I mean, so many good ways, So
I got it anyway. He has been super lovey dovey
since the conversation two weeks ago, using emojis he never
really used over overly supporting example, he told me good
job when he messaged I'm home from work. But now

(19:57):
it's an explanation to my question. My boyfriend's mom doesn't
live in the country. Her husband was able to get
them a trip here last year, so I was able
to meet them. I've kept light contact with his mom
since then. This year, they are able to fly out
here again. They'll be flying to the state that my
boyfriend lives in, so I would have to fly there
to see them. When my boyfriend and I had the
conversation that I brought up two weeks ago, I told

(20:20):
him that I wasn't sure if it was a good
idea for me to come out to see them. My
boyfriend had also told me that on his way to
his mom's airbnb, he forgot my birthday card at his place.
Ultimately decided that he would buy the tickets. I learned
that he doesn't know my middle name through this process
because he needed it to buy tickets. I told him
to send me the money and I would get the tickets.
So since getting the tickets, I've felt even more distanced

(20:43):
from my boyfriend. I feel like he didn't listen to me.
I don't think it's fair to him for me to
feel this way and stay with him. Yes, that was
a great thing that you just said. I don't think
it's fair to him for me to feel this way
and stay with it. Oh, I guess the fair to
him part. I don't care about him, but like, it's
not fair to you to feel this way and stay
with him that's what I thought you were saying originally,
it's not fair to yourself to feel that way and

(21:05):
stay in that situation. Yeah, yeah, it's just not fair.
At this point, I'm not even sure if I should go,
but I would hate to disappoint his mom, So I
guess I'm really asking would I be the a hole
if I broke up with my boyfriend and canceled the
flights because I'm not sure if this is a sustainable
relationship and there is an update, a big update, But
what is our answer that.

Speaker 1 (21:27):
You better have walked out of their asap.

Speaker 4 (21:31):
I better see we broke up not Oh, and then
he gave me this and gave me that, like, yeah,
these are clear signs of a very not good relationship.

Speaker 2 (21:40):
Yeah, yeah, it's not. It's it's just not good. In
the story that I read before, I mentioned the phrase
I've brought up like quite a few times at this
point that I don't trust I observe, you know what
I mean. You can hear all his lovey dovey messages
and whatever he says, but you have to, you know,
hear that say thank you or whatever, and then keep

(22:01):
an eye open, okay, because that doesn't patch the wound
of whatever he did before.

Speaker 3 (22:06):
Yeah, she sent me with that a lot of times.

Speaker 2 (22:08):
Well, I've brought it up in comor when we read stories,
and I brought it up with him because I had
been given that advice. And then I realized through observation
that he was actually a good person, this guy right here.
So I yeah, so it's true. It works. So you
can find people with that.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
Okay, yep.

Speaker 4 (22:28):
They all live in Taylor'sville, North Carolina and work at
a sawmill.

Speaker 2 (22:31):
Ye only it's the only kind of good man out there. No.
But but if you think that this is not a
sustainable relationship, and if you feel distant from him, and
if you feel hurt and like he doesn't maybe not
care about you or something like that, then you don't
need to meet his mom.

Speaker 1 (22:48):
You're gonna break up.

Speaker 2 (22:48):
With them anyway, you know what I mean. So might
as well just do this and not go through all
the pain of like still being around him and then
meeting his mom. You know, if this is an awful guy,
then maybe his mom is not the best either, you
know what I mean. So we're just gonna jump right
into this update now. Okay, but now for the update,
it's a bit of a long update, but you guys

(23:09):
helps me a lot. So here it goes. Two days ago,
I broke up with my now ex boyfriend, canceled the
flights and sent him the money for the tickets. Yes,
oh my gosh, thank goodness, Oh wow, thank I that
is the best thing you could have said.

Speaker 5 (23:24):
Hopey wow.

Speaker 2 (23:25):
Your comments have helped me tremendously through this process. I
didn't realize how bad of a situation I was in
the realization of how he's been treating me really set in.
He reacted exactly as you all predicted. I waited until
around two thirty ish am, hoping he'd be asleep to
end the FaceTime call to sell him the plane ticket
money and send the message I quickly drafted to say
I'm ending things between us. My phone started blowing up

(23:48):
minutes afterwards with messages and snapchats from him. Oh my gosh,
minutes so he wasn't asleep, like what. Most of them
just singular texts saying please, but also, I can't I
do this right now. I love you so much. I
can't out of nowhere. Don't forget about being and the
good times. I'm majorly freaking out of the bathroom Right now,
I can't stop shaking. I'm about to wake up my mom.

(24:11):
I wish you had come down. I was thinking how
beneficial it would have been for us to finally see
in person and talk some stuff out. The cycle of
him calling over and over again began to the point
I couldn't use my phone. I gave in and answered,
although I unfortunately don't remember all of what he said
because I dissociated through the call. The dissociation when I'm
with him explains my lost memories. Lol. Oh my gosh, man,

(24:34):
I'm so sorry girl. I wish I could give you
a hug. Oh my gosh. That is not a good
sign at all. So God, you're out of there now though.
Oh my gosh. All I can remember is I told
him it's final and I'm not changing my decision, and
him saying I can't believe I'm never going to hear
you say I love you again. Yeah, cry about it.
I don't know. I literally figure it out. Figure it

(24:55):
out all on your own. This isn't gonna make you
her stay okay. After the call, I got message, which
is the rest of the day. I feel like I
don't know who I am without you. I hope these
past few days, when you've told me you loved me,
you really meant it. Girl. Please block him. I hope
you block him. I haven't said or messaged anything to
him since the call ended, but I didn't block him
because one of you commented his behavior might worsen if

(25:17):
I did that, and truthfully, in this specific situation, it
seemed better not to block. It's saying his behavior might worsen.
That could go two ways. That could go into harming
himself or harming her, So if it's harming her, it's
probably better to not block. Obviously, you don't want him
to harm himself, but at a certain point with breakups,
I think a lot of manipulative people threaten that to
make you stay. But all you have to do is

(25:39):
call authorities and then move on because that is not
your responsibility. You can find other people who can take
responsibility of that. But I'm so glad that you're at
least not responding to any of these things, because that's
really the whole reason you would want to block him,
is just so that you can't talk to him anymore.
But I'm glad that you are controlling yourself and not
talking to him anymore. As you can imagine, I haven't
really slept, and I have I've had a headache from crying.

(26:02):
It sucks because I do still care for him and
I love him. I still wish the best for him.
Although I feel like I already warned this breakup and loss,
but I was hoping it wouldn't come to this. He's
had an fed up childhood and has been cheated on,
but that's not my responsibility to deal with, and his
projecting isn't acceptable either. That's right, girlfriend, Oh my gosh,
get yes, I'm so happy that you said that, because

(26:23):
that's absolutely not your responsibility. There's no way if someone
has been cheated on in the past and then they
bring it into this their current relationship with you or whoever,
and is like, well you have to do all this
to make up for my past, It's like no, not really.
I mean, sure, you don't want to cheat on them,
don't cheat on them, but like, you don't have to
like do all these things because they have a crazy

(26:44):
trust now or something like that, like a lack of trust.
That's their problem, girl, that's their problem. I'm so glad
you left that to him. My ex had the gifts
that I got for his mom, and when he gave
them to her, she sent me this message. Hello, dear,
I just opened the gift bag from you, and I'm
totally blown over by your generosity. I'm in love with
the backpack. Only one thing could have made it better,
and that's if you were here with a bunch of

(27:05):
sad faces. I don't know how the heck I was
supposed to respond to that. I've gotten texts all during
the day from after my ex. Wait, no, I need
to pause on that, because she's doing the guilt tripping now.
I'm sure you know he was saying all these things
about like being sad, but clearly we see where the
guilt tripping is from from his mother. So good thing

(27:26):
that you didn't have to do so, like I was
saying earlier, Good that you don't want to mean her
because he's just gonna She's just gonna be another version
of him in a lot of cases, not always, but
in a lot of cases. I've gotten texts all during
the day after from my ex. My heart aches for you.
All the love bombing. As you guys have taught me
in the comments, it really feels like I'm being thrown away.

(27:46):
My heart can't take this all day. Yesterday he messaged
me and snapped me, and I've been leaving him on
red ranged from You're the biggest part of my life
and my top priority. The only thing I've ever wanted
was to come home to you to do you just
want me to so for real, not talk to you
at all? Is it easy for you to not open
our chats and stuff? I don't get how you were
just able to do it. And please read and replied

(28:09):
later when you have time. I'm struggling and any message
back from you would do wonders. I guess I'll just
leave you alone. Please don't let the streak die. You
said you knew how much it meant to me. What
is the snap streak? You're saying like you know how
much snapstreak means to me, babe, you know. Don't let it.

(28:30):
Don't let it end. Don't let a snap streak end.
Oh you poor poor man. I'm so sorry for you
and your lost snap streak. That is that is really
so sad, and my heart goes out to you. I
woke up this morning to snaps. I sincerely hope you
read this. Please acknowledge my existing. I never thought you'd
ignore me one day. It would also make it easier

(28:51):
to leave you alone like this. I don't know if
you've read anything. Please don't let the streak die. You've
said you knew how much it meant to me. I
just hope I wasn't replaced or thrown away this. I'm
devastated the text I got this morning. My little heart
is very broken.

Speaker 1 (29:05):
Oh, your poor little heart. Oh, I'm so sorry.

Speaker 2 (29:07):
Your little heart deserves a very little violin. This is
truly my last message. I don't think you will ever
call me or text me back, so I won't bother
you anymore. It seems clear that you want me gone,
so I'm gone. I'll get the gifts to you because
my mom spent her money on it. I love you.
I loved every single moment with you, and I don't
think I will ever get over you. And now I

(29:28):
keep getting stat messages from him, see lying again. He
just keeps lying. I'm just getting more angry the fact
that he thinks that I just immediately replaced him. He
truly doesn't know me at all. Yes, I'm aware you
guys warned me and told me he doesn't care about
my feelings. It just sucks that I feel like I
was trying to be my best for him, and I
spent all this energy for him to expect me to

(29:49):
just move on. I don't know if he expects that.
It sounds like he's scared that you're doing that, and
he doesn't want that either. But I mean, this is
just how relationships go. No one moves on immediately unless
they like, really weren't that into the relationship in the
first place, you know. So yeah, he's just being a
little cry baby and just doesn't want you to move on.
He probably knows that you didn't, and which is why

(30:11):
he thinks that all of these love bombings will still work.
I will say that I didn't set clear boundaries to
not contact me, but I did say that I needed
time away from him. But I have to forgive myself
for that because the message was a little sloppy and
I just wanted out. The airline wasn't able to refund
the money for the tickets, so I just canceled the
flights and sent him the money for my savings. Oh

(30:31):
that's nice of you, but I wish you didn't. I've
taken this time to reflect on the past three years.
Oh wow, you were here together for three years. For
my twenty first birthday, I really wanted my boyfriend with me,
of course, to share the moment, but he ended up
driving down to his dad's for something, which was like
a six hour drive. It shouldn't really be that big
of a deal, but if I had known that it
was going to be the last birthday with my mom,

(30:52):
I would have been more focused on spending time with
her than the fact that my boyfriend couldn't just tell
his dad it was my birthday and I wanted him
there for my celebration party and he could drive down
there the day after after my mom passed, I ended
up getting COVID a month later, a boy which almost
took me out literally. My sister and I share an apartment,
but she basically lives at her boyfriend's, so I didn't

(31:13):
really have anyone to help me. I wasn't very financially
stable then, so the only thing I could do was
DoorDash liquid ivy. Oh gosh. I tried to drink liquids,
and I tried to eat what soups I had in
my kitchen cabinet. I couldn't function. The most I could
do was force myself to take a very hot shower,
and I had the kitchen stepped stool to sit on
because I could barely stand to walk to the bathroom.

(31:34):
Oh my gosh. After the shower, I would wrap in
a towel and sit on the bathroom floor until I
could muster the energy to get back to bed. My
hair was matted because of the multiple showers without brushing.
I was dealing with nausea that I've never even come
close to feeling before. And only when I was finally
able to get a phone call appointment with a doctor
was I able to get some advice to get dramamine.

(31:55):
Thank God, because it's probably one of the only things
that got me through. It's the fact that I explained
my symptoms and the doctor said, oh, you got that
straight up COVID comforting. I was sick for like four
weeks before I could stand for more than two minutes
without running out of breath and feeling like collapsing. By
the end of it, I was eighty nine pounds oh,
oh my gosh, because I couldn't keep anything down. My

(32:16):
ex told me that he wasn't really able to do
anything because he had tests in school and he couldn't
get sick, understandable. I suppose there's a lot that you
could do with dropping things off, like dropping things off
wearing a freaking hazmat suit, like literally get a hazmat suit.
I would. I would absolutely just mask up, get wear
gloves and drop off food or do anything that is

(32:40):
so sad, because I guess sure that's understandable. But if
you really don't have anything, and your partner is telling
you that you love they love you, and they're not
even like trying to help, They're just like I don't
want to get sick, you know, like that's that's tough. Man.
He drove to my apartment once and brought me Chinese
food from our local grocery store and stood on the
sidewalk away from my front door while I grabbed the food.
See you, he facetimed me. Every now and then. I

(33:02):
really have to shout out my neighbor for helping me
survive through it. I had pet sat her cat previously,
so she messaged me asking if I was okay because
she noticed my car hadn't moved in like a week
and a half. Oh wow, good move on the neighbor
for checking out or looking out for her dang. I
worked six out of the seven days of the week
and early mornings late evening, so the fact that she
noticed my car and not moving made me feel noticed.

(33:24):
Oh that's really so sweet. I told her I had COVID,
and she immediately asked if I needed anything. She got
me meds and anything I needed put it outside my door,
and I honestly can't thank her enough. It was such
a tough time for me, but I'm alive. That's right, Op,
you are. You got through it. When I finally was
testing negative, my neighbor asked me if there was anything

(33:44):
that I thought I could keep down. The only thing
I could think of was olive garden soup and salad.
So I geared up with gloves and a mask in
long sleeves just in case. She brought me to Olive
Garden and I was able to eat two menistrown soups
and some salad. This neighbor is now one of my
closest friends and part of my support system, especially now
for this experience. The list goes on from my ex

(34:04):
has done, but I don't know why I stayed after
I had to tell him I was deleting life. Three sixtyeks.
It didn't feel like it was just for safety. Yeah, well,
hindsight is twenty twenty. Don't be too hard on yourself.
Reading over your comments has made me been able to
really reflect on this relationship and pinpoint some specific moments
of his gaslighting, insecurities and whatnot. The list goes on

(34:25):
for why I want you guys to check out more
stories just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts,
or your favorite podcast app and search. Okay, story time,
lots of good stories and hopefully good advice from us.
We'll do our best, and there is a little bit more.
So let's just jump right into it ready. Community. Thank
you so much. I knew I had to leave, but

(34:46):
I think I just really needed that push, and you
guys helped me with that. My dad used to always
tell me that people will someday take advantage of my kindness,
and I didn't really understand until now. I've recently just
finished the Throne of Glass book series, and the thing
I keep thinking about is when it Aileen's mom told her,
you do not yield, and Aileen kept telling herself that
from then on, my situation isn't to the extent of

(35:07):
what her character went through. But it's the quote that
I keep telling myself. I do not yield to people
trying to make me lower than them. The path to
a very long healing journey starts here. Again. Thank you
guys for all of your comments, support and bluntness. Thank
you for the stories you guys have shared with personal experience.
I hope you guys are doing better now. They've been
helping me keep strong through all of this, reminding me

(35:29):
why I have to leave for myself. That is the
end of that story, Sam.

Speaker 1 (35:35):
Here, we're gonna get back to the stories. But here's
three of it's bads from our sponsors.

Speaker 5 (35:39):
I came out with my fiance to my parents and
now they want to send me to conversion camp. Just
a smelly, smelly move on the part of your parents.

Speaker 2 (35:52):
Ugh.

Speaker 5 (35:53):
And before we continue on here, there is a trigger warning.

Speaker 1 (35:58):
These parents in this.

Speaker 5 (36:00):
Story areobic and if that dynamic between a parent and
a child is not something you can hear right now,
go ahead and skip this story and head to another one.
So am Ida hole for not wanting anything to do
with my family. I female nineteen, just came out to
my family about being the g NLGBTQ and I'm sorry people.

(36:25):
I really want to be able to say that right now,
but we're having some monetization issues with these words, which
is not up to us. So for starters, I was
adopted into a pretty religious household. My biological mom couldn't
take care of me and had to give me up
A year after she did, my family adopted me. By
the way, this comes from user striking Wall eighty seven

(36:47):
thirty three, and if you want to submit your own stories,
go over to the r slash Okay story time subbriddit.
So my childhood was okay, but my parents were and
still are very religious. My family is very well known
in the community since my dad is a pastor for
the church. My friend and now fiance, female twenty we
met during church and instantly hit it off. We did

(37:08):
everything together and I could tell that I started having
feelings for her in ninth grade. I knew she liked
me back because she told me a couple weeks beforehand.
High school was okay. I was in a couple of sports,
but I mostly liked soccer. Most of my friends came
to all my practices and games, and I liked that
I could tell she actually cared. So during the summer
before eleventh grade, my friend invited me to go with

(37:30):
her family to Hawaii, and of course my parents were
okay with it, so I was very excited. For the
whole week leading up to the trip, me and my
friend went clothes shopping and basically spent that.

Speaker 1 (37:40):
Whole week doing that.

Speaker 5 (37:42):
Well. Two days before we had to leave, we were
at the mall again and I was trying on swimsuits
or trying to find one that fit me. I was
and still am, very athletic, but also skinny. So my
then friend came into the changing room to help me
tie the top, and she basically gave me a little
smooch and that started the whole being together thing. Fast
forward to now, me and my fiance have been together

(38:04):
for about two years and her parents know and are
very supportive. So I figured it was time that I
told my parents I'm not living at home because I'm
going to college. So I texted my mom and asked
if it was okay if my dad, her and me
and Hannah, my fiance, could go out to dinner, and
my mom agreed, since her and my dad haven't seen

(38:25):
me since I left for my freshman year of college.
A couple months ago. Oh and by the way, my
parents are paying for my college. I hope they don't
hold that over Opie's head.

Speaker 1 (38:34):
Oops.

Speaker 5 (38:35):
So the day comes around and me and Hannah go
to the restaurant and meet my parents. Of course, my
parents are happy to see me and Hannah, so we
sit down and eat, and everything was.

Speaker 1 (38:44):
Going smoothly until dessert.

Speaker 5 (38:47):
My mom asked me why I wanted to do this
dinner with them, so abruptly, I looked at her and
basically said that I needed to tell them something, and
of course my mom went straight to you're pregnant. I
told her, no, I'm not actually funny story about that
crazy story though, you're not actually gonna believe it.

Speaker 1 (39:06):
Ooh. She looked relieved and said, okay, what is it.

Speaker 5 (39:09):
Then I looked at her and said, I'm not straight,
and I've known since high school. The look on my parents'
face was like they got hit by a freight train.
I looked down because I didn't want to look them
in the eyes. My mom, after a few minutes, started
making a scene, crying and yelling at me, saying that
I'm a disgrace and everything else under the book, and
that she raised my siblings and I better. I was

(39:32):
crying at this point, which is understandable, ope, and my
dad was quiet. I looked over at Hannah and she
showed my parents the ring and they both turned red
in the face, which, honestly, gotta love that, Yo. These
people deserve to be made uncomfortable and you don't need them. Yeah,
if your parents can't accept you for who you are,
you don't have to accept them either. You are free

(39:53):
to be your own person, to live your life as
long as you're not hurting.

Speaker 1 (39:56):
Anybody, that's right.

Speaker 5 (39:57):
My mom just stormed out and my dad followed her,
and I was just sitting there, stunned and crying. Luckily
Hannah was there. So fast forward to about last Saturday.
I didn't speak or hear from my parents since Wednesday,
and out of the blue, my mom texted me saying, Elizabeth,
we raised you better than this, and we want to
send you to a conversion camp and we're going to
pay for it. I just stared at that text for

(40:19):
a couple of hours before responding and basically yelled at
my mom and cussed at her, told her that I'm
not going to change for them, and that if they
can't accept me for who I am.

Speaker 1 (40:29):
They are no longer my parents. I mean, ya exactly.

Speaker 5 (40:34):
If they go through, if this is how they feel,
then I will never speak to them again. And I
blocked her number. It's been a week now, and I'm
wondering if I overstepped by saying that. Am I the
a hole? Or did I respond the right way. I
will give an update at some point, but I just
can't get the feeling out of my head that I overreacted. Also,
do I talk to my dad because he's not blocked,
but he hasn't said anything to me, or hasn't messaged

(40:56):
me or called me.

Speaker 1 (40:58):
And there is an update? John, Wow, Yes, what what.

Speaker 5 (41:02):
Kind of behavior would we classify the parents as?

Speaker 1 (41:09):
Right now?

Speaker 6 (41:10):
I mean, we gotta be sent through some orc clouds.
We got we gotta get some some ethereal spaghetti in there.

Speaker 1 (41:16):
It's gotta be eaten by.

Speaker 6 (41:19):
James Gandolfini his pigs, his pigs almost, I said, James Gandolphini, Right,
James Gandler.

Speaker 5 (41:27):
The spirit of him resides within the jail, inside the
black hole that runs even the spaghetti icee, icee, And
we are going to see right now, we got the update,
My dad texted me and basically said that they are
no longer going to be paying for anything for me.

Speaker 1 (41:44):
Ah ah, and there it is.

Speaker 5 (41:48):
He said that they called the university and told them
they were no longer paying my tuition, and then he
said they're no longer paying my car bill or my
cell phone and are taking me off their insurance. I
kind of expected this to happen, but what he said
after words hurt me so much. I'm crying and I
just want to hide away from the world. He said
they only adopted me to give me a better life
outside my home country where I was born. He said

(42:10):
that they supported me when they didn't need to, and
that he expects to be paid back all the money
he spent on me.

Speaker 6 (42:16):
I want to go on a time machine and tell
you to never talk to your dad and run.

Speaker 5 (42:22):
If I'm the wife and I hear him say that,
I'm like, hey, so I'm leaving you.

Speaker 1 (42:29):
I guess like I mean, but I was probably like yeah, yeah,
right exactly.

Speaker 5 (42:36):
His wife's probably right behind him like yeah, you tell it,
you tell it like it is.

Speaker 1 (42:41):
Husband. Just honestly, like there.

Speaker 6 (42:48):
I truly wish there was a law that's like that
would these these parents need some jail time.

Speaker 1 (42:54):
They need to be scared strong.

Speaker 5 (42:55):
I think you should go to jail if you adopt
somebody and then literally are just like yeah, I mean,
I just did it because I wanted to feel good
about myself, I guess.

Speaker 1 (43:03):
And now that you.

Speaker 5 (43:05):
Don't live the way I want you to, you owe
me your upbringing. You have to pay me back for.

Speaker 1 (43:12):
That sending an invoice, dude, come.

Speaker 5 (43:15):
Trash, never coming back from that. Yes, so if I
don't pay him, he's going to get me to the
place where I belong. What does that mean? Is that
an ambiguous threat?

Speaker 1 (43:25):
I think it is.

Speaker 5 (43:26):
This hurts so much, knowing that I was never loved
and that they only adopted me for the money. I
don't even know what to do. I blocked him and
didn't say anything.

Speaker 3 (43:35):
What should I do?

Speaker 5 (43:36):
I feel like my whole life is effed up now,
and we have a second update.

Speaker 1 (43:40):
Let's go ahead and dive right in. Let's do it.

Speaker 5 (43:42):
I really don't know how to update you guys with
everything that has happened already. It's taken me by surprise,
and I'm not going to lie. I had a feeling
this was gonna happen, so I showed my uncle the
text messages from my dad his brother, and he's livid
and basically wants nothing to do with my father and mom. Also,
he said that I can stay with him if I
wanted to, and I took him up on that offer.

Speaker 1 (44:05):
Cool Uncle, Yes, yes, go cool Uncle.

Speaker 5 (44:09):
I also told my brothers and sent them screenshots of
the messages, and they aren't happy with our parents either.
I posted the message on the church's Google website and
also our town City Halls Facebook page YO and sent
it to the group chat with the rest of my family.

Speaker 1 (44:24):
Yes, honestly, they need to learn a lesson. Time for
some public shaming, let's go.

Speaker 5 (44:30):
My fiance and I talked briefly about everything, and she
said that I need to have time alone to think
about everything, and well, me and my insecurities were right.
About seven hours later, she sent me a handful of
messages and I have screenshots of those. But I'll give
you guys a rundown me. Why are you talking to
my parents, you know, because of what they said, and
you're still talking to him per because I want them

(44:51):
to be a part of our life. Elizabeth. Maybe you
don't want that, but I do, so why can't you
accept that me? Are you e fing kidding me? No?
I don't want to accept that because of what they said.
But obviously you don't care about how I feel and
what's best for us. You only think about what's best
for you her. Are you serious? I do care about us, Lizzie.
I basically said that the wedding is about you, and

(45:13):
you went with it. I was there for you when
your grandparents passed away and when you found out that
your bio mom passed away. You don't get that I've
dropped everything for you in order to keep you happy.
I want your parents in my life because I respect
and like them. Me dot dot dot her really dots?

(45:34):
Where are you so we can talk about this? This
is all, by the way, wild that this is her fiance. Yeah,
I'm I'm totally lost. This is why is the fiance
on the parent's side right now?

Speaker 1 (45:47):
How could you ever side with them?

Speaker 5 (45:49):
I don't like, however, I don't know, like they hate
you exactly like they would want you. They want to
send you to conversion camp. And She's like, I like
and what I like and respect them. They're say, trying
to hate crime you? Yes, Like this is crazy?

Speaker 1 (46:04):
Uh?

Speaker 2 (46:04):
Me.

Speaker 1 (46:04):
I'm driving and I don't want to talk about it
right now.

Speaker 5 (46:07):
I don't think it's best that we talk about it
in person, because obviously you want them in your life
more than you want me in your life, and it
feels like you don't want me to be your wife.
So have fun with your new parents, because I'm done her. Elizabeth,
Please don't say that. I do want you as my
wife and I want you to be happy, but at
the same time, they are like parents to me.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
I just can't cut them out of my life. Baby.
I'm sorry that you feel this way.

Speaker 5 (46:29):
I really am. You make me happy and without you,
i'm nothing. You make my day better just by walking
in the room. Your smile is contagious.

Speaker 1 (46:36):
Me. Just stop.

Speaker 5 (46:38):
You're just saying that to make me forgive you, and
I honestly can't. I thought maybe that you would have
taken my side and supported me in my decision, but
instead you went behind my bag to talk to my
ahole parents that never effing loved me and adopted me
for just the money and just to say, oh, look
at our wonderful daughter. No, I'm done, I really am.
Also another note here, Yes, oh, Opie's fiance who she's

(47:00):
conversing with right now has parents that supported her, so
her being like, they're my parents too. It's like, but
you already have your actual parents who actually support you.

Speaker 6 (47:13):
Yeah, it's just such a wild thing for the fiance again,
it's like they hate you, like they want they want
to send you to.

Speaker 1 (47:22):
Them, to the commercial camp. Nonsense.

Speaker 5 (47:25):
It makes no sense, so her she says, Lizzie, please
don't say that you're done. We can make this work.
You don't need to have anything to do with them.
But I want them as a part of my life.
Which that doesn't make any sense because if she's there,
she's in your life, then they're gonna be, you know,
peas life in some way. And I also want you
to be a part of it as well. Remember a

(47:46):
couple of weeks ago when we were at that one
restaurant and we were talking about buying a house and
adopting children or finding a donor and having biological kids.
I want that still. I want that life with you me.
You think that's going to fix the fact you're talking
to my parents who want you don't want anything to
do with me anymore. And two I thought maybe you
would have taken into consideration how I felt and talked
to me beforehand. But let me guess you also said

(48:08):
that they're still invited to our wedding. Her well, yeah,
I thought they would be, dude, and they probably said
that out of anger and they're probably hurting Lizzie. You
need to talk to them and why wouldn't they be
invited to the wedding?

Speaker 1 (48:20):
They are your parents, dude? What's the girlfriend's name again? Hannah? Hannah?

Speaker 2 (48:24):
Hannah?

Speaker 5 (48:25):
Nah, dude, Hannah given Hannah's a bad name.

Speaker 2 (48:28):
Dude?

Speaker 1 (48:28):
Uh?

Speaker 5 (48:28):
You are?

Speaker 1 (48:29):
You are?

Speaker 6 (48:29):
You are making Hannah's run for the hills right now, wow,
because they are gonna need to be in hiding with
what a bad refutation you are putting upon them?

Speaker 5 (48:37):
R truly truly me, they aren't invited to the wedding,
if that's even still happening, She responds with a gif
of a shocked face me what. You obviously care more
about them than me. I honestly didn't want to do this,
but it's either me or them, so pick because I'm
letting you know right now. If you pick them, we're done.

(48:59):
I'll go to a pawnshop and sell the engagement ring.

Speaker 1 (49:02):
Her. You're not serious, right, me.

Speaker 5 (49:04):
I am very serious, pick me or my parents? Her Ben,
You're just gonna throw away two years over stupid fight
you have with your parents. I want all of you
in my life, but I see that can happen, and
I want you to be happy, I really do.

Speaker 1 (49:16):
But I can't pick either of you.

Speaker 5 (49:18):
I don't want to lose you, and I want your
parents to be part of my life, Lizzie, So I'm sorry,
but I can't pick.

Speaker 1 (49:23):
Are you? Are you crazy? Hannah?

Speaker 5 (49:26):
Do you realize that now that her parents know that
you're her fiance and not her friend, they're going to
treat you differently.

Speaker 1 (49:33):
You don't be a crazy?

Speaker 6 (49:34):
Plot twist is if she just like goes along with
it and then she's like Hannah's like, oh, I'm s
right now and I'm with the parents, and you know
it's all good.

Speaker 5 (49:45):
It's like just like she was low key, just trying
to replace her as a straight daughter.

Speaker 1 (49:51):
Oh my god, that's crazy. Oh that would be a
crazy move.

Speaker 5 (49:55):
I say, seems like you want to throw away two
years for it beat parents. So about four hours has
passed and she finally answered me. And this is where
it gets bad.

Speaker 1 (50:04):
Oh, it wasn't even bad yet Oh my god.

Speaker 5 (50:07):
Uh, I guess it may be more like hurtful for me,
per Lizzie. I don't want to lose you, but I
have to pick your parents. I'm sorry, but they are
important to me, and I just feel like this whole
situation is dumb and that you overreacted. Your parents have
a right to be mad, and they don't hate me.
They said that they love me no matter what, So

(50:27):
I'm sorry. Is it okay if I get the engagement
ring back? Since I'm pretty sure we are over? That
was a lot of money and it would be nice
to be able to pawn it and have that money
for an apartment.

Speaker 1 (50:37):
No, it's mine now, it's mine. Now, you picked my home,
big parents, it's mine now? Oh my god.

Speaker 5 (50:44):
I still have not responded. I also sent this to everyone,
and I have the screenshots. This was our whole conversation.

Speaker 1 (50:52):
What do I do?

Speaker 5 (50:53):
I am really confused and hurt as to why my
parents are okay with her but not me. Any advice
will help. I told my uncle you guys said he's
awesome and amazing, and he said he appreciates it, but
he's just.

Speaker 1 (51:06):
Looking at for Lizzie bear. FYI, I hate that nickname
I love.

Speaker 6 (51:09):
I'm sorry, but I love it, Lizzie Bear, Dude, this
give this man, uncle of the of the universe, lifetime space.

Speaker 5 (51:18):
A truly uncle. Give it to him the uncle he's uncle.
It ap statue in his honor. Yeah, and there is
an update here with some more messages. So her, Elizabeth,
why are you acting like this? This isn't you, I say,
why do you care how I act and how I
don't act? You made it very clear that you don't
want me to be a part of your life. So
I already canceled the wedding and also the venue. And

(51:40):
since I was the one that paid for the honeymoon,
I canceled your ticket and still have mine. You made
your decision and you have to live with that choice.

Speaker 1 (51:49):
Her. I'm sorry, Elizabeth, I want you back. Okay, I
fed up, But your parents are going to be in
my life, please, baby, I'm sorry. I'll do anything for you.
Apparently not.

Speaker 7 (51:59):
Apparently you won't even pick her over her bigoted parents
who are for some reason don't hate you, who is
also not straight.

Speaker 6 (52:10):
I think the parents are literally doing it as a
means to like torture, Opie.

Speaker 1 (52:15):
They they revel in their hatred.

Speaker 2 (52:19):
You might be right because it doesn't make any sense.

Speaker 5 (52:23):
Yep, nobody's making any sense in this story except for
op I've seen a couple of people comment about me
saying something about top surgery. I just want to clarify
that me saying that has nothing to do with what's
going on in my life choice. It doesn't matter what
you guys think about that. It's insensitive that you bring
it up for no reason. I had medical issues that
I needed to get it done at the time, but

(52:43):
I'm doing better, so please don't bring it up because
it has nothing to do with what's currently going on.
And by the way, I can tell you that currently
you can find out what's going on with full episodes
with stories like this, except not there are no stories
like this.

Speaker 1 (52:59):
This story is one of a one of a kind.

Speaker 5 (53:01):
You can listen to full episodes of this podcast on Spotify,
on Apple Podcasts, on wherever you get podcasts from UH
just search up Okay Storytime and you will find literally
forty eight days, forty eight entire day's worth of podcasts
to listen to.

Speaker 1 (53:17):
Twenty like that's playing twenty four to seven.

Speaker 5 (53:19):
By the way, twenty four to seven, no breaks so
we do have another update here.

Speaker 1 (53:25):
All right, John, do you have anything.

Speaker 5 (53:26):
To add I think we've we're both at a loss here.

Speaker 6 (53:30):
I mean, this is just a once in a lifetime
what the F moment? I mean, honestly, let's look at
the positives here. Op is getting rid of of stinky, terrible, horrible, bigoted,
homophoid parents, true and crazy insane.

Speaker 1 (53:47):
We do not know what's going on with you, ex fiance,
go double true. So hey, let's let's keep let's let's
keep moving. Update number three.

Speaker 5 (53:56):
So I know it's been about two weeks since I
last updated you guys. From my update, a lot has happened.
I had my uncle go over to my parents' house
to grab some clothes of mine and my cat. And
while he was over there, he went through my dad's
phone and saw messages between my father and my ex Annah.
They are basically having an affair.

Speaker 6 (54:25):
On the list of things we never saw coming.

Speaker 1 (54:35):
Who found the phone? Mom, No, I think it was uncle, Uncle, Uncle. Oh,
poor sweet, oh uncle, poor sweet babe. Oh you did
not deserve that.

Speaker 5 (54:47):
Oh No, he's now, he's no longer the Funkle, He's
a funcle, the affair Uncle. He found the affair dude.
Oh my god. Okay, oh wow, Okay, continuing on here,
My mom was notified and she is going through the
process of getting a divorce. I have officially moved in
with my uncle and I'm continuing my classes for college.

(55:09):
I have had some contact with my parents and ex
that led me deciding to get.

Speaker 1 (55:13):
A restraining order on all of them.

Speaker 5 (55:16):
Sorry, this update wasn't very drama filled and that is.

Speaker 1 (55:23):
The end of that story. You are joking right now.

Speaker 6 (55:29):
My mother's favor my sibling over me, so I told
her she's my second favorite parent.

Speaker 5 (55:34):
Ooh yeah, Now the shoes on the other foot now,
huh huh.

Speaker 6 (55:38):
Gosha Mom, I twenty one female have some problems with
my mom. It's not that I don't love her, I
truly do, but her behaviors make it really hard to
get along well with her. By the way, this comes
from Recognition Civil ninety seven ninety six on the Oslus
Okay Storytimes Zebrata and if you want to send in
your other stories, go to our SU's Okay Storytime Phil

(55:58):
those bad boys in there. Oh yeah, it's mainly because
of her favoritism towards my grandma and uncles. She cares
about them too much at this point that she had
no qualms about cutting down my expenses ordered to save
my uncle some extra cash he.

Speaker 1 (56:10):
Can spend on booze.

Speaker 6 (56:13):
Initially, my mom's obvious favoritism wasn't that much of a
big of a deal, since I pretty much got used
to it, but it always irritated my dad. He was
considering getting divorced because of these issues, but I convinced
him not to because I still loved my mom and
wanted her around. However, another big problem with our relationship
is my brother quote unquote twenty five male. We're not
related because he used to be my mom's student when

(56:36):
he was in high school.

Speaker 5 (56:38):
M Oh, that's a very tenuous connection.

Speaker 6 (56:46):
I am concerned about this particular relationship. Well, I was
fond of him back then, since he's always been nice
to me. But I never saw him as an older brother.
He was just one of my mom's any students for me,
not something necessarily special. Oh it's special, right, But my

(57:07):
mom loves him so much.

Speaker 1 (57:10):
That she says he is her son. Does that mean
that she is his mommy? I'll let you decide. He's
not even legally adopted or anything.

Speaker 6 (57:21):
He has his own parents, but he just happens to
have this mother son bond with my mom, and whenever
he finds a chance of physitist, my mom makes sure
to fling in my teeth that he is the child
that she chose. This situation enraged my dad even further,
and they fought a lot due to this, but each
time my mom brushed it off and ignored my dad,

(57:43):
and I didn't see the point arguing further, since she
is not the type of person who admits.

Speaker 1 (57:48):
For a mistake, hey shout out to awareness.

Speaker 6 (57:51):
Instead, I decided to follow a different strategy. I've always
been close to my dad, whether my mom was there
or not. Therefore, I decided to emphasize that I love
my dad more than her. I did it several times
in a joking way, like here's my second favorite parent.

Speaker 1 (58:09):
What's behind door number two?

Speaker 5 (58:11):
The parent I like less than the other one?

Speaker 1 (58:15):
Her door number matches her ranking in.

Speaker 5 (58:18):
My hands, right, because she's number two and she stinks like.

Speaker 1 (58:21):
One all the twos.

Speaker 6 (58:24):
When I went to greet my mom after I returned
from college, she didn't like that at all. And yeah,
I know it's wrong for me to say that, but
I enjoyed making her upset, so I did it a
few more times, but the last time I did it,
she burst into tears. I wasn't expecting that reaction at all,
and it kind of feels like an emotional manipulation tactic
to make me feel guilty. But regardless, they caught me

(58:46):
off guard and I kind of feel bad. Now I
could use some advice here. So am I the A hole?
We have an edit, but just real quick, before we
get into it, is will be the A hole?

Speaker 1 (58:56):
Opie.

Speaker 5 (58:56):
I think you guys in competition, you start working up
too okay, you start being better than the sky.

Speaker 1 (59:04):
No, okay, clearly no. But it's like, what's going on?
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (59:09):
This would be so weird. I really don't know what
advice to give. I don't know whether you should just like,
maybe just stop caring. I don't know if that's reasonable
to even like say about you know, a mother child dynamic,
like she's giving you a good reason to stop caring

(59:33):
as much clearly did I.

Speaker 1 (59:37):
Got nothing. This is so weird. Let's get to this.

Speaker 6 (59:40):
So I feel the need to make this edit since
many people got confused about one thing. I was twelve
years old when my dad was considering a divorce. It's
not recent. It's not like I was a grown, foody
adult who forced my dad to be codependent in a
toxic relationship. With that being said, my parents are in
love with each other. They've been married for twenty four years,
and they still go on romantic dates regularly by each

(01:00:02):
other fancy gifts, and they are still affectionate with each other.

Speaker 1 (01:00:04):
I knew this as a child too.

Speaker 6 (01:00:06):
That's another reason why I didn't want them to get divorced.

Speaker 1 (01:00:10):
My dad loves my mom dearly.

Speaker 6 (01:00:12):
Yeah, but he was ready to set boundaries for my sake,
and I felt guilty like I was ruining the relationship.

Speaker 1 (01:00:17):
And I'm glad they're still together.

Speaker 6 (01:00:18):
They're preparing for their twenty fifth anniversary within a month. Hope,
hope that clarifies this, and we have a big old
wop in edit that we are just going to wop
wop wop right on in one dive. I wasn't expecting
to make an update so soon, but a lot has happened, which.

Speaker 1 (01:00:36):
Left me even more tired and confused.

Speaker 6 (01:00:40):
This morning, the gift that I bought for my dad came.
He wanted to buy a smart watch, but thought they
were too expensive. Therefore, I was saving my money to
buy him a nice one. I ordered it last week
and wanted to surprise him. I received the watch this morning,
and I gave it to my dad and he just
stood there frozen for a moment, and then hugged me
tightly and thanks me repeatedly. When he finally let me go,

(01:01:01):
I saw my mom's face. She was tearing up.

Speaker 1 (01:01:03):
She said she deserved to be treated with love like
my dad.

Speaker 5 (01:01:07):
Did she actually forget at this point?

Speaker 1 (01:01:13):
What are we doing? What are we doing? Does she
not know? Tell her? You gotta tell her, yeah, as
she hadn't been told yet.

Speaker 6 (01:01:19):
Tell her even implied that I just bought this watch
to make her jealous of my dad. I explained to
her that that wasn't my intention and showed her the
exact date that I ordered the gift. You calmed down
a bit after that, and she apologized for the assumption.
Then she explained that she knew she wasn't perfect, but
still loved me deeply. It was hard to believe her,
considering the stark contrast between her kind treatment towards my grandma, uncles,

(01:01:43):
and brother quote unquote and her cold treatment towards me.
I told her that exactly, and she apologized again and
promised to be better. I wanted to believe her, I
really did, but after all those years, it no longer mattered.
Maybe I'm being too harsh, but I'm not that little
girl who desperately wants her mom's affects anymore. I still
said I would appreciate it, though she hugged me tightly

(01:02:04):
and said she loved me more than everyone else, which
made me tear up a bit. I'm not gonna lie.
I told her I loved her too, which is true,
and I really do love her. But after everything, I'm
not sure if I want to be close to her anymore.
I just feel numb, if that makes sense. However, I'm
seriously considering going low contact with her. My college is
going to start within two weeks, and I won't have

(01:02:25):
to see my mom until next summer. This is good,
I guess, question mark.

Speaker 1 (01:02:30):
At least I will have time.

Speaker 6 (01:02:31):
To cool off and think about if I still want
to have a relationship with her. In any case, I'm
firm about going low contact. I don't think I'm ready
to cut any ties with her for good, at least
for now, because if I go completely no contact with her,
I fear I might end up forgiving her. That's why
I think going low contact seems like the best option here.

Speaker 1 (01:02:49):
It's kind of a switcher roo.

Speaker 6 (01:02:51):
Yeah, it's almost like you kind of context is like
she starts going to the grass is always greener.

Speaker 1 (01:02:57):
Yeah, and the flip flops syndrome.

Speaker 5 (01:02:59):
It's like, oh know that is my mom it maybe yes,
like no, no, no, like no, I need to remember.

Speaker 6 (01:03:05):
I always have that two percent. Never forget okay, never
forget that that two percent. That just reminds me, like nope, nope, nope.
That's why this is why. Oh yeah, we keep it separated.
Should I go no contact with her? Or do you
think that I've been too harsh with her? I don't
know what I should think. I'm really confused any suggestions
about my situation.

Speaker 1 (01:03:24):
We have an update number.

Speaker 5 (01:03:25):
Two, but to count up, I think low contact is
fair because, like you know, it's it's both like, yeah,
it can remind you whether you want to maintain a
distance between the two of you, or it can inform
you on if you might be changing your mind about
what you want to do. But either way, it's like

(01:03:46):
her weird, like refusal to see your perspective in this
where it's like I don't understand.

Speaker 1 (01:03:53):
It's like, how do you not? I mean right? That
was her.

Speaker 5 (01:03:56):
That was basically her take, the mom's take, yeah, like
what like.

Speaker 1 (01:04:00):
What like am I not remembering that?

Speaker 2 (01:04:02):
Right?

Speaker 1 (01:04:03):
I'm sorry? Like, but the mom's take on like it
was like why are you doing this to me?

Speaker 5 (01:04:07):
And then OP was like because this Yeah, mom's take
was like what that's crazy.

Speaker 6 (01:04:14):
Yeah, mom refuses to accept reality and instead creates her
own distorted reality that serves her sick, twisted whatever.

Speaker 1 (01:04:23):
Yeah, whatever's going on with her.

Speaker 5 (01:04:25):
So with that in mind, it's like, you're probably not
going to really make any headway there in a constructive way.
So any kind of bridge for this gap is going
to have to come from her side first.

Speaker 1 (01:04:37):
All right, Update number two, let's get into it.

Speaker 6 (01:04:40):
Not much has changed since I made my last update,
but I still want to share some details with you guys.

Speaker 1 (01:04:44):
First of all, my mom is treating me better now, okay, okay.

Speaker 6 (01:04:48):
The first thing she did when she woke up this
morning was coming to my room to kiss and cuddle
me again, don't trust it, which was something she used
to do when I was a kid not gonna lie.
It felt really nice and emotional. I felt like that
little girl who wanted nothing more than to spend.

Speaker 1 (01:05:00):
Time with her parents.

Speaker 6 (01:05:01):
However, it also reminded me of the fact that my
mom wasn't doing it since I was a kid, and
that feeling of being unloved and neglected came back to.
It kind of became a sort of bittersweet moment for me.
My mom was nicer towards me overall since that.

Speaker 1 (01:05:14):
Gift incident that I shared in my last post.

Speaker 6 (01:05:16):
I was not sure about what to do, but I
was highly considering going low contact with her. There are
several reasons why I chose not to go full no
contact for now. One, if I go no contact with her,
it can cause me to miss her, which would make
me more emotional and weaker in the process. Therefore, I
think I would end up forgiving her even after everything
that's happened.

Speaker 1 (01:05:33):
Does this make you.

Speaker 6 (01:05:34):
Weak, perhaps, but at least I know myself. Number Two,
it could damage my relationship with my dad. I didn't
realize this possibility. Someone made this point in that post.
As I mentioned my other posts, my parents love each
other very much. That means if I go no contact
with my mom might end up sacrificing my relationship with
my dad, since we'd have a much more limited time
to see each other, and I don't want that.

Speaker 1 (01:05:53):
At number three, I.

Speaker 6 (01:05:53):
Consider going no contact a bit extreme for my situation.
I've seen people here who deal with serious problems because
of their parents, and that's why they go no contact
with them, and they absolutely have every right to do that.
But to be honest, my mom isn't a Disney villain
or an overall bad person. She's just a flawed mother
with her problems. You know what, we can we can
bring down the hammer a little bit more on Mom here.
We can we can be a little more critical.

Speaker 1 (01:06:16):
I think so yeah. I believe so yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:06:20):
I believe s we can come down a little.

Speaker 1 (01:06:24):
Harder than them. Mom deserves a little bit more than
what she's getting over here. She's to be more.

Speaker 6 (01:06:30):
However, I know I'm not responsible for her problem, and
I'm sure as heck I don't feel bad because of them.
I still love her and understand her motives better now,
but I also understand that those problems don't justify her
mistreatment towards me. Because I'm tired of excusing her behaviors.

Speaker 5 (01:06:45):
Big facts, right there, Boom that gets five big booms.

Speaker 1 (01:06:49):
Big booms. Brought the boom of those facts.

Speaker 6 (01:06:53):
And you know what, if you want to bring the
boom to your freaking ear holes, you should go to Spotify,
Apple Podcast, your favorite podcast and listen to full listen
this is one story?

Speaker 1 (01:07:03):
How about full episodes? How about that? How about it?

Speaker 6 (01:07:07):
Why don't you go there and search okay, story time
and instantly just just listen to the whole catalog.

Speaker 1 (01:07:12):
It's all right there.

Speaker 5 (01:07:13):
Yeah, while you're washing dishes, anything you got but say,
howdy doodle to forty eight consecutive days worth of podcast
content now.

Speaker 6 (01:07:22):
Many people in my last post also suggested that going
low contact for now would be the best solution for me,
and I.

Speaker 1 (01:07:27):
Agree that this is the best, not just for me,
but also for my mom. This is what I'm gonna do.

Speaker 6 (01:07:32):
Also, I can't believe I say this, but I actually
missed my college. Being back there will give me some
time to cool off and take everything in. If anything,
I'll be distracted for a while. Anyways, I'm really grateful
for all the support and advice.

Speaker 1 (01:07:44):
You guys are truly amazing. Thank you for everything. Hey, y'all,
it's John og Host here.

Speaker 6 (01:07:50):
We're gonna get back to the stories, but here's a
quick three minute break from Asper more sponsor. I resent
my biological father, but he doesn't even know I exist.

Speaker 1 (01:07:58):
That's not good.

Speaker 6 (01:07:59):
The story I got told at fourteen was that my
dad wasn't my biological father. He was the man who
married my mom after I was already born. And basically
my mom and dad thought at the time that I
deserved to know this because a few people in our
environment kept saying how I didn't look like him, and
I was asking them if I was maybe adopted or something.

(01:08:21):
By the way, this comes from yes, of course I'm
mad on the oar slash okay story time Separate it.
If you want to send your own stories, go to
our slash okay story time.

Speaker 1 (01:08:27):
Separate it and send it in.

Speaker 6 (01:08:29):
Very little was spoken of the man that my mom
got pregnant with, but the basic gist of it was
that he didn't care about mom being pregnant, didn't want
a child in the first place, and then she'd want
anything to do with him any further. So she cut
all contact, no child support. Because my mom's family is
well off, I won't bs you and say that I

(01:08:51):
wasn't hurt, but I got over it quickly enough with
the help of my mom and dad.

Speaker 1 (01:08:55):
Sadly, mom and dad.

Speaker 6 (01:08:57):
Got a divorced last year. Just felt like they didn't
love each other that way anymore. I guess they're still
good friends with each other, though no drama, for which
I'm grateful. Still, this sort of prompted me into thinking
about my biological father lately, and I ended up looking
him up online. Don't know what I expected to see, really,
but he's just normal. I guess I might have been

(01:09:20):
thinking he'd have this kind of a whole look to
him because of how he rejected me far I was
even born. But anyways, one night, after drinking or then
I should have with some friends on a night out,
I did a stupid thing and sent him a message
basically accusing him how he's a horrible evil and other
less polite words because.

Speaker 1 (01:09:40):
Of how he abandoned me.

Speaker 6 (01:09:42):
So the next morning, after I actually remembered what I did,
I saw his reply to me. It's polite but confused,
and he has no idea who I am or how
I'm supposed to be related to him. I had my
dad's last name, saying in the end that I probably
got the wrong person.

Speaker 1 (01:09:56):
Wish he wished me the best. I don't know. It
just pissed me off, even.

Speaker 6 (01:09:59):
Though Oh I was sober and a bit hungover, so
I fired up several paragraphs to him about exactly who
I am, exactly who my mom is, and what he
did to us. His reply came in the evening, and
it was quite extensive, but I will sum it up
for you. They broke up with each other on bad
terms after they were together for a little over a year.
She never mentioned any pregnancy to him, and when he

(01:10:22):
tried to contact her later afterwards because he felt like
crap over how it ended, she rebuffed him and blocked him.
And that was the last time he tried getting in
touch with her. Needless to say, me being pissed off
at him was gone in a flash, and now my
father was the one angry at my mom for doing this.
I was wondering how to talk to my mom about

(01:10:43):
what I found out, but I didn't have to bother
because my father contacted her first and confronted her about
hiding me from him. Oh whoa Oh, what a twist?

Speaker 1 (01:10:58):
What a twist?

Speaker 5 (01:11:00):
Not a dead beat Dad, just he's a lot no
idea how to beat We don't be no retake.

Speaker 6 (01:11:10):
Living on the beats, living on the beats, living on
the beats, that's what he is.

Speaker 1 (01:11:17):
That's the one saved me.

Speaker 5 (01:11:23):
Yeah, I can also understand the mom's position, but also like.

Speaker 1 (01:11:29):
Only at first, like you gotta tell at.

Speaker 6 (01:11:32):
Some point, you gotta you're done fed up, you're done
fed up, and dad, he's coming for you now and
not that way, that way you mind not it goes
not anymore. Those days are long gone. We're getting to
know each other slowly, mostly over the internet. That we
talked a few times over video chat. Because he doesn't
live in the same country as us, it'll be oh,
maybe that was also a factor in it, where it's like, oh,

(01:11:53):
he doesn't live not that that excuses her or anything,
but like living in different countries, that's crazy.

Speaker 1 (01:12:00):
How long did he live in that country?

Speaker 2 (01:12:02):
Though?

Speaker 1 (01:12:02):
You know, it's like.

Speaker 5 (01:12:03):
That's true, more information needed, But it's like there could
be some situation in which that you would you would
tell that, right, but not if it's untrue.

Speaker 1 (01:12:11):
This guy's didn't know he had a kid, and now
he's now he's getting active, he's get a.

Speaker 5 (01:12:15):
Yeah, and he immediately seemed to be taking some level
of responsibility.

Speaker 1 (01:12:19):
Come on by going, hey, hey, why didn't you tell me?

Speaker 6 (01:12:23):
It'll be time soon enough to meet ir L in
real life, and I'll nervous this act. But by all
accounts and the way he's talked to me and held
back on sharing with me the rest of the family,
I think I'm going to like him a lot.

Speaker 1 (01:12:35):
Why the F did she do it? We're going straight
into it.

Speaker 6 (01:12:38):
She says that she has no idea why she really
did this, blamed it on the pregnancy and stuff. But
I don't see how the pregnancy could have influenced me
her for my whole life exactly. That's the biggest nonsense
BS answer.

Speaker 1 (01:12:51):
Come on, I love.

Speaker 6 (01:12:52):
Her, but there's times that when it's just the two
of us and I can't help but hating her for
denying the both of us the chance to get to
know each other as I grew up. I can tell
my father has heard about this, though he doesn't talk
about it directly, and my mom can probably guess how
I feel, given that she just starts tearing up at
times she sees I'm angry or being kurt with her.

Speaker 1 (01:13:12):
That doesn't feel like she gets it.

Speaker 5 (01:13:13):
That feels like she's trying to manipulate you into being
less upset, not gonna lie, although it could be he
does feel bad about it. But for her to be like, oh,
I don't know why I didn't tell you it was
pregnanty hormones. That's BSh So she's already gonna tell you.
That feels like this is BS two A split in half.

Speaker 6 (01:13:32):
Happy when I'm talking to my father, but my like,
heck when I talk to my mom afterwards. I want
all of us to get better, but the same time,
I want.

Speaker 1 (01:13:39):
Her to hurt. Wow. What do I do now? And
there's some relevant comments. Well, first of all, please just like,
don't do that. Yeah, I don't do that. Don't do that.
He's an emotionally charged like kid.

Speaker 5 (01:13:53):
Right now, you're you've been hit with a very sharp
spike of emotion, no baggage to sort of compute all
at once. Yeah, but like, taking vengeance against your mom
is not going to make you feel any better. In fact,
over time, it'll probably.

Speaker 1 (01:14:12):
Make it feel worse.

Speaker 5 (01:14:13):
Yes, So, like I think if you want to do anything,
I would just try to get your mom to be
honest and get more to the root of why why
did you do this?

Speaker 1 (01:14:26):
Because her excuse is BS. So we got some relevant
comments from No, No A thousand times.

Speaker 5 (01:14:31):
No.

Speaker 6 (01:14:32):
I'd actually suggest you and your real father take a
DNA test to verify things. That is a great idea,
and your mother knows why she chose what she chose.
It was only seventeen years ago. Your dad, who raised you,
might know something too. Did you ask him? Opie said, sorry,
I wrote this in one go completely forgot to put
in his.

Speaker 1 (01:14:50):
Side of things.

Speaker 6 (01:14:50):
My dad had no clue either about what happened. He
only came into our lives when I was around three
to four years old, and he took what my mom
said to him as the truth and didn't really know
otherwise until I talked to.

Speaker 1 (01:15:02):
Him about it recently.

Speaker 6 (01:15:03):
Wow, just another freakin' Oh yeah, and the test was
already done. He is my father. Mom keeps saying she
really doesn't know a little. Imsreary says, these kinds of
things have become sticky and tricky. I would sit with
your mom down and talk to her about this, tell
her about what you know, tell her that you're angry deservedly,

(01:15:25):
and tell her that you don't want to be angry
at her forever, but you don't know how to get
past this.

Speaker 1 (01:15:30):
Opie says.

Speaker 6 (01:15:31):
I did talk with her, though I'll be the first
one to admit that it was less of a talk
and more of me just throwing out one breastest or
another with her not answering and just crying. I just
want to know why, and she's not telling me crap.
I asked her if she if he was door or
if he cheated, if he did anything to deserve something
like this, but no, he apparently didn't do anything wrong.

(01:15:52):
My father says they were just people that clicked poorly
at times and didn't communicate well, so it kept escalating
until it just blew up in their faces again. They
were teenagers. Well, he was my mom's older than him
by a few years, so that's no surprise. OPI on
her parents' ages when she was conceived. She was twenty
four when she got pregnant. My dad will always be
my dad. The fact that I found out the truth

(01:16:14):
about my father doesn't negate their relationship we have, or
the fact that he raised me as his own. He'll
always be my dad, even if I grow close to
my biological father as I've grown close to my dad,
my adopted dad over the years, and he knows this.
I made sure if and says, I think you really
have your math wrong. My father was nineteen when it
was with my mom, who's five years older than him,

(01:16:34):
got pregnant. Even if he was seventeen, which he wasn't,
it wouldn't matter since I just checked and the age
of consent here's fourteen.

Speaker 1 (01:16:42):
Oh night, What the that is too young? Sidebar?

Speaker 6 (01:16:45):
But we do have an update coming in. I wonder
if part so he was nineteen and she was twenty four.

Speaker 5 (01:16:56):
I sorry, I'm still just slack jawed at fourteen.

Speaker 1 (01:17:02):
That's insane. WHOA we have the update.

Speaker 6 (01:17:07):
I found out why she told me the lie. Oh boy,
thought my biological father didn't want me. Okay, we're gonna
get the answer.

Speaker 1 (01:17:15):
Wow.

Speaker 6 (01:17:16):
Okay, it's maddeningly simple and stupid.

Speaker 1 (01:17:20):
Ah madness, I love madness.

Speaker 6 (01:17:23):
She was basically getting to know my adopted dad, her
now ex husband, and he wanted to know about my
father's involvement in our lives. Put on the spot, she
made this ridiculous story about how he didn't really care
for having a child. They didn't keep in touch and
over the years it evolved into an effing theater play,
which is what I got years down the line when

(01:17:44):
I asked about my father. So she told the one
little white lie and then just built the whole universe,
built it, built a multivers around. We were in the
one vie rainforest. We made passionate love amongst the practices.
And then that tiger that came out of nowhere, and

(01:18:05):
I said stop, and I shot you out at the
tiger and bumped him on the nose.

Speaker 1 (01:18:10):
The tiger ran away, and I held.

Speaker 5 (01:18:11):
You in my arms for that first time, and I said,
I've never seen a man boop a tiger like this.

Speaker 1 (01:18:17):
My dad, we're gonna get the real story here.

Speaker 6 (01:18:19):
My dad, I guess, uh didn't want to put salt
on the wound, so he just avoided the subject in
the future until I asked about it.

Speaker 1 (01:18:26):
That's it.

Speaker 6 (01:18:27):
That's the whole reason why I didn't know my father
for all my whole life up until recently. No, really,
because she didn't want to look like some spiteful crazy
woman who neglected to tell someone that their father. She
made this up, which is some bitter irony for her,
because she does look like a crazy spiful woman with
the lies she is told about my father. I am
so mad at her. I can still barely control my

(01:18:48):
anger around her. All I want to do is hurt
her until she feels really hurt, like I was when
I found out I missed out on knowing my father
all along and him getting to know me as well again.
Would not advise that he is a seventeen year old
Harmony answers.

Speaker 5 (01:19:04):
Yes, this is yes, this is a teenager who needs therapy.

Speaker 1 (01:19:08):
Probably the alongside is mom yes? Agreed or degree?

Speaker 5 (01:19:14):
Probably not at first, I would probably say you want
to do some solo sessions first and then bring mom in,
especially if he's this angry.

Speaker 6 (01:19:21):
It's like I also agree with that. Yeah, yes, this
is a good plan. I restrained myself more often than not.
But god dang, this isn't something that's going to be
just pushed to the side. I don't know what we'll
do now, and I know that sometime in the future
I'll probably re establish having a good relationship with my mother,
But right now it's just not happening. But on the

(01:19:42):
brighter side of things.

Speaker 1 (01:19:43):
I met my father, eh Bio Daddy.

Speaker 6 (01:19:46):
Some people mentioned in the last thread that I should
be careful how when and where I meet him. Someone
thought that I would be flying out of the country
to meet him, I think, but given how everyone that
knew him back then and now had nothing good to
say about him, I connected with my father's side out
of the family, plenty of cousins, aunts, uncles and so
on to talk with and meet, and it's a bit
overwhelming with just how many of them are there are

(01:20:07):
and how overjoyed they were to find out about me.
I gave him a few dates when we could meet,
and he picked this last weekend. He flew back on Friday,
visited his parents, my grandparents, and man, that's so weird
how I have another set of grandparents a hole mix.

Speaker 1 (01:20:21):
I really don't know what I was expecting.

Speaker 6 (01:20:23):
I mean, yes, we talked and he seemed very understanding
and kind and good and so very interested in meeting
up with me. But I guess there was this kind
of effed up fear of him not liking what he
actually saw in leaving. No really, thanks for this craft, mom,
It didn't matter in the least. As soon as we met,
there was just this moment. I don't know how to
describe it. I don't really think I've ever had anything

(01:20:45):
like that before. And he just hugged me and I
could feel him shaking. I think he was holding himself
back from crying, and I started crying for.

Speaker 1 (01:20:51):
No real reason. And then we talked and just spent
the rest of the day together.

Speaker 6 (01:20:56):
By the way, if you want more cute moment, if
you want a lifetime of cute moments that you can
spend every waking hour of your life listening to, true,
go to Spotify Apple Podcasts in your favorite pod app
search Okay story time and listen to full episodes with.

Speaker 1 (01:21:12):
Stories just like this.

Speaker 6 (01:21:13):
Wait, stories just like this. But we have just a
little bit left here ooh, here we go. We pretty
much spent the whole weekend together. From the moment I
got up, we talked, and by the time he was
boarding his flight, I didn't really want him to leave
ever again, and he won't, not really. He wanted to
know everything about me, and I mean literally everything, And
I guess what really made me actually love him is

(01:21:34):
him asking to meet my adopted dad, asking me if
that was okay with me, and then thanking him for
his part in raising me. That damn is a class act.

Speaker 5 (01:21:47):
Move, Dude, Are we back in school right now, because
that was classy.

Speaker 1 (01:21:51):
That was classy.

Speaker 6 (01:21:52):
Af dude, I dude, A lot of good male role
models in this in these few stories today.

Speaker 1 (01:21:58):
This is good love this.

Speaker 6 (01:22:00):
They talk some more with each other while I was
busy with something else, and I think these sort of
became friends.

Speaker 1 (01:22:05):
I don't really know what to call their relationship, No.

Speaker 5 (01:22:09):
Dad, I think like, honestly, if I was in the
like bio Dad's position and I met the guy who
like raised the kid that I never knew I had,
I'd be like, hey, respect, yeah, and I would hope
they'd be like also respect.

Speaker 6 (01:22:26):
And and and he did he did nothing wrong. It
was the mom that lied to everybody.

Speaker 5 (01:22:32):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:22:32):
God.

Speaker 6 (01:22:33):
So it's like if we're if we're if we attack
adopted Dad, it's the equivalent of uh, when when someone
goes in cheats and the person goes after the affair partner,
It's like, nah, go after your freaking partner, right, they're
the one that that that cheated.

Speaker 5 (01:22:47):
Off, right, you know what I mean, Like the most
pertinent part that you could go after.

Speaker 1 (01:22:51):
Come out of the priorities.

Speaker 6 (01:22:53):
So to all of you who helped me deal with
my ft up situation, thank you from the bottom of
my heart. Thank you, even if it seemed like I
was just venting out loud to the Internet.

Speaker 1 (01:23:02):
Thank you all. And that's the end of that story.

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I met someone from a Dating App… and then he swindled my father! - r/TwoHotTakes | Reddit Stories

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}I met someone from a Dating App… and then he swindled my father! - r/TwoHotTakes | Reddit Stories