I told my father to step up… or else my mother might leave him! - r/BestofRedditorUpdates | Reddit Stories - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the intergalactic John. This is Alien Salm on
the International Okay Storytime podcast station, and we have some
human stories coming up, not alien, but before we make
a landing, stick around for this two minute not alien
ad break before we get to these interstellar stories. I
told my father to step up or else my mother

(00:21):
might leave him.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
I guess he's stepping down.

Speaker 1 (00:23):
It's time to step up or step off. For context,
I'm a sixteen year old girl and my dad is
a fifty seven year old man. I love my parents
a lot, and I am so grateful for all of
the things they do to provide for me. However, me
and my dad have always had a bit of a
strange relationship. He is not very good at communicating, and
sometimes it feels like I can't talk to him about anything.

(00:43):
By the way, this comes from user, I might cause
a divorce. And if you want to submit your own stories,
go to the r slash Okay Storytime subbreddit. So this
does bother me, But the real issue in our house
is that my mom does everything every day. She makes dinner,
does the dishes, the laundry, at et cetera. On top
of this, she recently started remotely working full time again,

(01:04):
and she's currently going back to college to get her
master's degree. I do everything I can to help out,
but I can only do so much. My dad works
full time and that's it. He never does any chores
or helps around the house at all. He does work
a labor heavy job, and I understand it's tiring, but
he could at least give our dog a bath, or
make dinner for himself or something. Both me and my

(01:24):
mom have said many times that we want him to
help around the house, and he always says he will,
but he never does anything. He did the dishes a
couple times, but he didn't do it thoroughly enough and
there was still food on them, so my mom had
to rewash them. I've honestly gotten really tired of this,
as it's been going on for years. And here's where
I might be the a hole. This happened three days ago.

(01:45):
My mom was in class that night, so she hadn't
gotten an opportunity to do the laundry yet, and there
was a basket of dirty clothes in my parents' room.
My dad off handedly remarked, Gee, there sure are a
lot of dirty clothes laying around. This made me really annoyed,
I told him that he was a grown man and
if he wanted clean clothes, he could do a load
of laundry himself. My dad looked surprised at this and

(02:05):
told me to calm down. I have a tendency of
speaking harshly to people when I'm irritated, and this was
unfortunately one of those moments. So I told him that
I swear to God, if you don't shape up and
start doing some actual work around here, mom is gonna
want a divorce. I knew immediately I shouldn't have said it,
and he left the room looking really angry. I'm not
sure if it's relevant, but he has been married two
times before my mom. I told my mom about this,

(02:27):
and she says that while he should do more work,
what I said was really mean and the divorce comment
was completely unnecessary. And my dad got home from work
the next day. I tried to apologize, but he completely
ignored me and just went outside' been three days and
he hasn't said a word to me, even though I've
tried to say sorry multiple times. My house is now
really tense since my dad is also mad at my
mom because he thinks she wants to get a divorce.

(02:48):
I feel horrible, but honestly, deep down, I still agree
with the comment I said to him. So am I
the A hole? We have some comments from ope here.
Has your mom actually mentioned to you that she wants
to leave your dad? If she hasn't, then the comment
you made would be stirring the pot for no reason,
which would probably make you the a hole. Your dad
does sound hard to live with, though, so I can't
really blame you. Ohp He says, yes, my mom has

(03:11):
mentioned that she wants to leave him, but she's not
in a financial position to do it at the moment.
And there are some comments comment one not the a
hole as the daughter of a man very similar to
the way you describe your father. He's using weaponised and
competence and the silent treatment as manipulation. You weren't out
of the realm of possibilities by saying what you said.
I know, because after eighteen long years, my mom finally
divorced my dad. It may have sounded harsh to him,

(03:33):
but that's because people with no accountability for their actions
will always feel attacked. I hate to say it, but
it sounds like your mom would be better off without him.
As far as the silent treatment goes, it hurts and
it's childish and annoying. But the best thing you can
do is look back straight through him, play the game back.
It won't take long before he's pretending like everything's fine
again and he's waited on hand and foot reply. Turn

(03:55):
that weapon of incompetence on him. Set up a rotating
or alternating schedule for dish.

Speaker 3 (03:59):
Dude.

Speaker 1 (04:00):
The days after he does the dishes, anything that he
didn't get clean is for his meals. Mom and daughter
can use paper plates and plastic were those days, but
they know the days after they are doing the dishes
they will be eating off of actual dishes. That just
sounds real, petty. I don't think the solution to this
is to get pettier.

Speaker 4 (04:15):
You had the comment had us in the first half
of where I was like, yeah, why don't you just
took a scheduled thing, you know, yeah, and there it
makes sense, and then then you got super petty. I
was like, though, you know, you're not the eye for
an eye thing doesn't work, or you know, just yeah,
just have a conversation.

Speaker 1 (04:28):
And ope you won't if your parents do divorced, it's
not your fault not on you. The comment too, is
not the A hole. My favorite part of this is
you voice of concerns you and your mother share about
his lack of help around the home, and his response
is to go hide in his shed rather than to
actually do anything to fix the problem. Did he ever
even do the laundry? I feel like you also have
to explain to your mother how this makes you feel

(04:49):
that she is constantly placing your dad's feelings in comfort
over both of yours. Is this the kind of relationship
she wants for you when you are older. Also make
it clear that it's pretty impossible to drift away from
only one parent after moving out. You don't want to
get to a point in a few short years where
you stop coming around at all because you don't want
to watch her, hear, or deal with it anymore. Comment

(05:11):
three says, not the A whole. I think you were
a little outside of your bounds, but you should realize
that you're sixteen and you really shouldn't step into your parents'
marital problems. It's frustrating and unfair, but snapping won't solve anything.
He's acting like a child by just ignoring you, So
maybe just let it go. He's heard, You're sorry, and
you don't have to repeat it. Your only job as
a kid is to learn from your parents, especially from

(05:32):
their mistakes, and to carry those lessons into the future.
Just tell your mom you're there for her, and do
your best to live your childhood without worrying about your
dad's problems. Be a kid and let the adults deal
with it. Don't let this rest on your shoulders. And
Opie was voted not the a hole.

Speaker 2 (05:47):
Holy heck. That comment. That was the best comment.

Speaker 1 (05:49):
That was a good one. That was good. First of all,
I want to say thank you to everyone on my
first post who commented about their opinions on why I
was or was not an a hole. Everyone was very
kind and you all gave great feedback. The verdict on
my post ended up being not the A hole, though
a lot of people said it wasn't my place to
speak on behalf of my mom like that. After thinking
about it, I agree my dad was being a knucklehead,

(06:11):
but I really shouldn't have put words in my mom's mouth.
Now onto the update. About two days after I had
posted on here, my parents sat me down and said
they wanted to talk. I was prepared to get a
lecture about how what I said was out of line,
but that's not what happened. Apparently, the reason my dad
had gotten so upset at the comment I made was
that it hit a little too close to home. As
it turns out, my dad has been cheating on my

(06:33):
mom for about a year with one of his co workers,
and my mom found out a few months ago. The
reason she went back to work was because she needed
financial independence to get divorced. They said they hadn't been
planning on telling me, but my dad decided I was
mature enough to know the truth and that I deserved
to know. They said they would probably be separated by

(06:54):
the end of the year. The situation was completely out
of left field, to be honest, because while my dad
might not have been the best doing the dishes, I
never thought he would have an affair. Yeah. Yeah, well
he's bad at doing the dishes, but he's great at
doing his secretary. My dad has talked to me about
how he was so sorry for what he's been doing
and that he hoped I didn't view him differently. I've
tried to be kind to him and not say any

(07:15):
more unnecessary comments, but I did let him know that
I was really disappointed in him. I needed to get
out of the house. So I've been staying with my
friend for the past couple of days and processing everything.
And by the way, you can process full episodes of
stories just like this with your ears on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, iHeartRadio,
wherever you listen to podcasts. All you gotta do is search, okay,

(07:37):
story time. Well, it certainly makes more sense now why
the mom was like, yeah, I think I might divorce
your dad. I think if I found out my partner
was cheating on me for a year and it had
been a couple months, I might not be able to
keep it to myself anymore.

Speaker 4 (07:50):
You kind of hit the hammer on the head there.
The divorce is gonna happen. Best thing you can do
is just support your mom the best you can. And unfortunately,
if your dad needs you, give him like a paddle
on the back and be like you did this, Yeah,
you cause this.

Speaker 2 (08:02):
I feel no sympathy.

Speaker 1 (08:03):
While what I said to my dad might have been crappy,
it did result me in finding out the truth about
what was going on, So I'm kind of glad I did.
I'm sorry that this update isn't the happiest or anything,
but overall, I'm doing okay. And thank you again to
everyone who commented on my first post. I appreciate it
a lot. We have some more comments from Ope. Commenter asks,
I won't lie, I'm super curious how old Ope's mom is.

(08:25):
Opie replies, my mom is fifty one, turning fifty two
in a few months. Commenter says, I confess I'm wondering
the same thing about Ope's Dad's a fair partner. Opie says,
I've actually met the woman he was cheating with at
some of my dad's work events before I knew what
was going on, of course, but I'm not sure how
old she is. If I were to guess, i'd say
she's in her late thirties. Commenter says, this just broke

(08:45):
my heart for you, honey. Just know that you have
people who care about you, because I know this is
so confusing and you have so many emotions. Be brave though,
for your mom, because she's probably silently struggling inside for
a while with this. To be fair, it hasn't been
silent because Opie is sad. Their mom has told them that,
so it was starting to.

Speaker 5 (09:03):
Leak out yeah where all this comes from it, But
because just no way a sixteen year old is.

Speaker 1 (09:06):
Telling their dad, Hey, Mom's gonna divorce you unless mom
has told the sixteen year old that that's on the table.

Speaker 4 (09:12):
Sometimes we don't know, but in this case, I think
the parents didn't want to. They don't want to involve
you in their mess until it's figured out.

Speaker 2 (09:19):
And it sucks. Just don't blame yourself.

Speaker 4 (09:21):
I hate that thing where like parents get a divorce
and kids literally are like pointing the finger like what
did I do? Or like how can I stop this?
Or how the what if thing? Like what if I
did this? What if I did that? You did nothing?

Speaker 2 (09:33):
All you can do is just support in this case,
your mom the best you can.

Speaker 1 (09:36):
I just hope for the best for y'all. Much love
to you and your family, op, He says, thank you
very much for your kind words. They are very much appreciated.
I can only imagine what my mom has been feeling,
so I've been trying to help her out as much
as I can comment her. I'm so sorry, Op, but
hopefully this is a great new life for you and
your mom. I'm sorry for whatever step monsters he inflicts
on you, which is classic case of can't be single

(09:58):
because he wants a maid. But did he do the laundry?
Thank you so much for the well wishes, and no,
he never ended up doing the laundry, and that's why
they got divorced.

Speaker 4 (10:08):
And that's why that man's got That man has dirty laundry.

Speaker 1 (10:11):
I mean, like, look, he never aired out his dirty laundry.
It's a man in his late forties early fifties can't
do his own laundry. Who are you man?

Speaker 2 (10:18):
We'll just set a day to do chores.

Speaker 1 (10:20):
But that's the end of that story. My girlfriend's friend
is showering her with expensive gifts. It makes us both uncomfortable.
Make a rain, Make a rain. The main people are
Liz twenty eight female, my girlfriend, Jay twenty eight male,
my girlfriend's childhood friend, and Me twenty nine male. Thank
god we stopped at three. Liz and Jay grew up

(10:42):
in the same neighborhood, just a few houses down from
each other. Ooh, she's girl next door. They were best
friends in elementary school and then drifted apart a bit
in middle school. But during high school, Jay's parents went
through a real nasty divorce. I'm not really clear on
all the details, but I know that Jay's dad moved
out and Jay and his mom were really struggling financially.
By the way, this comes from user throwaway Weird Gifts,

(11:04):
and if you want to submit your own stories, go
to the r slash okay storytime subreddit and submit them there.
So Liz's parents are about as kind, generous, and warm
as people you'll ever meet, and they took care of Jay.
He would often have dinner with them, do family stuff
with them, crash at Liz's place, and during this time
Liz and j became best friends again and stayed that

(11:27):
way until college. Jay ended up getting a major scholarship
to a really good school out west and left for school,
while Liz stayed close to home. Over the years, they
followed each other on socials, but had little other contact.
I met Liz a little over three years ago as
part of a social league for a volleyball in our city.
By luck of the draw, we were placed on the

(11:47):
same team, met each other at the welcome event and
really hit it off. Is that the luck of the
draw or is that fate my guy?

Speaker 6 (11:53):
It could be a bit of both, perhaps a.

Speaker 1 (11:56):
Nice sprinkling of both. She is kind, gracious, smart, witty, beautiful, fun,
and it's just the right amount of competitive. It's actually
really important. She's the kind of girl that guys meet
and fall in love with, and I guess I'm one
of those guys. But somehow she also liked me. A
year after meeting, we were moving in together and talking
about the future. By no means is our relationship of

(12:18):
fairy tale romance. But we've weathered our fair share of
storms and have what I believe to be a healthy
relationship with a good old horizontal mambo life. We've got
strong communication and shared goals and values. We've talked marriage
and kids, all of it. Here's where Jay comes back
into the story. Okay, a few years back Jay started
a tech company with a friend. Their company grew rapidly

(12:41):
and was bought out by a major player in the
tech world. Jay moved back to our city this year.
On Labor Day, we went to a party at a
friend of Liz's from high school. Jay was also there.
It was the first time that Liz had seen him
in probably four or five years, so the two spent
a lot of the party catching up. I'm not originally
from the air, so many of Liz's friends have become

(13:02):
my friends, so I was hanging out and let them
catch up. On the way home from the party, Liz
said that Jay had invited us over to his new
house and that we needed to find a date. A
few weeks later, we headed over to Jay's house. From
the moment he opened the door to greet us, Jay
was weird to me. I think he didn't realize that
I was coming too. Maybe he thought Liz was coming

(13:22):
by herself. Almost the whole day, Jay spoke only to Liz.
When Liz would try to introduce me in the conversation
or talk about me, Jay seemed to change the subject
to reminisce about old stories. He was very strange and
just kind of exhausting.

Speaker 5 (13:37):
Yeah, this certainly is a strange scenario now, given how
he's acted.

Speaker 1 (13:44):
At first, I was like, Oh, this is gonna be
that weird. Liz's family, you know, kept Jay from being
unhoused when he was a kid, you know, because I'm thinking, oh,
he's going to give her a bunch of gifts, and
it's like, well, it's probably he just feels now that
he's in a position to repay the kindness that was
shown to him that he wants to do it, but
the fact that he's being like, yeah, your boyfriend cool.

(14:06):
Remember that time that we both stayed up until five
am reading like Harry Potter together, we were pretending to
be the characters. Yeah, Well, I mean I.

Speaker 6 (14:16):
Can understand, like, you know, wanting to relive those things,
because those memories can be very sweet and very like
fun to relive, but it is still, I mean, especially
if she's there with someone else, like, it's good to
include him in the conversation too, instead of just being like, oh, yeah,
you don't know about any of this and we don't
need to tell.

Speaker 1 (14:32):
You actively involving yeah, exactly. Eventually I went inside to
the kitchen to get a drink and chatted with Jay's chef.
He has a private chef to make his food. The
chef was cool and confirmed that he had been told
it was Jay plus one guest for dinner. Liz and
I tried to chalk that whole day up to a
misunderstanding that maybe he just wanted to continue catching up,

(14:54):
but there have been plenty of awkward things since then.
So for example, when it Jay's, Liz saw a le
cusette Dutch oven and said something about always wanting one
but not being able to justify the cost. Well, you
won't believe what showed up on our doorstep a few
days later, the exact same le cusette. She one time
mentioned that she really likes a very expensive classic lounge chair,

(15:16):
but it's almost four thousand dollars. It showed up at
our place the next week. Maybe just be like, I've
always wanted to own a piece.

Speaker 5 (15:22):
Of land, you know, in like Aspen, Colorado, and see
what happens.

Speaker 6 (15:27):
I feel like, if Op is complaining, then he should
be like, hey, hey, hey, don't you really want like
the new you know, PS five and like the new
switch that's coming out, you know what I mean. And
she's like, oh yeah, I really really wanted this, And
then then boom, you just get free gifts for him too.
Prop it off of it, my.

Speaker 1 (15:44):
Guy, until a love letter shows up with one of them, right,
and then it has to stop. Once the love letter's there,
it's over. She said something the next day when we
saw Jay, but he gave us this weird smile and
said multiple times that he didn't know what she was
dalking about. I don't know what you're talking about.

Speaker 6 (16:00):
What you're talking about you are so crazy what.

Speaker 1 (16:04):
Jay's building a new company that creates tech for the
hospital industry. For this reason, he has connections with restaurants
and breweries all over the city. In the fall, he
invited Liz to a special dinner at a chef's table
that is inside of the kitchen at one of the
nicest restaurants in the city. Jay knows the chef, so
they would get the royal treatment. When Liz asked if
I could come as well, he told her that the

(16:24):
table only seats two.

Speaker 6 (16:25):
Of course, it does very convenient.

Speaker 1 (16:28):
See and that's when you go. I guess I'm not
going then, because I have a husband. Liz and I
talked it out for a while and in the end
decided that she would go without me. She reported back
that it felt like two friends having dinner together. I
was talking about the whole thing with a coworker who
told me she had also done the chef's table and
the table seats four. At the beginning of December, Jay
invited her to a special event at a local museum.

(16:50):
One of the major museums in our city hosts a
special Christmas party that you have to be invited to,
and it is really exclusive. Think like a knockoff version
of the met Gala without the celebrity in holiday theme.
Jay got two tickets and invited Liz. She's wanted to
go for ages and never thought it was possible. So again,
we talked it out and decided she would take him
up on the offer. Look, at this point, this is okay, yep,

(17:13):
but like you need to get clarity.

Speaker 6 (17:15):
It has like plausible deniability for sure. Sure, but you know,
inviting you to a fancy restaurant, we're like inside the
kitchen or something. You're sitting at the stove, whatever it is.

Speaker 1 (17:27):
And they grew up together, you know, So it's okay.
It's the lying that would immediately get me on its face.
It's like, well, I've known this person for every childhood friend,
we grew up together, We've been through a lot, yep.
But why is he saying that the table only seats
two and it seats four? Why is he taking you
to the you know, the met Gala of our city. Yeah,
I bet you could have got three tickets for sure
and put an effort to talk to OPI two. Right,

(17:49):
I think we know the answer to these questions is
as Opie's partner, it's like, you need to go to
Jay and be like, Hey, so we're just friends. That's
all we're ever gonna be because I'm married to my
husband and I love him. Yeah, I love you too,
who you're my best friend?

Speaker 6 (18:01):
Different way though.

Speaker 1 (18:02):
Right again at the event, she says he acted like
a friend, but in hindsight, it feels weird that he
keeps inviting her to stuff like this. As I'm writing
this out, I already feel like people are getting ready
to tell me she's cheating on me, or that I'm
a pushover for letting Liz go to one on one
things with Jay, which I disagree with. But one, we

(18:22):
don't have that kind of relationship where I wouldn't let
her do something she wanted. And two, she is super
honest with me. She's also a terrible liar. She has
the easiest tells in the world. She's too moral and
good natured to keep a bad secret. That's why I
believe her when she's assured me time and time again
that Jay is very much in the friend zone. She
is not interested. She believes that he is lonely and

(18:43):
wants to return to being best friends. My worry is
that Liz naturally sees the best in people. For example,
if someone cuts her off in traffic, her natural responses
only must be in some kind of emergency situation. She
genuinely trusts people, She cares for people, and wants the
best for them. I, on the other her hand, of
a natural skeptic. I tend to think that people are
just out for themselves. I find her optimism really beautiful,

(19:06):
but struggle to see the world in the same way.
So the long and short of it is that we
both feel uncomfortable with the gifts and fancy dinners that
he keeps getting her. But when she brought it up
to him, he says he's paying her back for taking
him in during high school. So the White Elephant gift exchange,
it's always weird stuff for funny items. Jay showed up
with a second gift that he was cagey about all night. Hmm.

(19:28):
Someone thought it was part of the gift exchange and
he kind of freaked out a little bit. Near the
end of the night, he pulled Liz aside and gave
her this second gift. Inside was a designer handbag and
a super expensive pair of designer heels. She felt very
uncomfortable accepting them, and in the awkwardness of the situation,
just said thanks and then we left soon after. Now

(19:49):
two days later, Liz has decided she wants to return
the gifts to Jay and tell him there too much.
I think she said that they were almost two thousand
dollars combined. I think we need to tell Jay to
back off as well.

Speaker 3 (20:00):
Well.

Speaker 1 (20:00):
But Liz is saying that I'm being overly harsh. What
I'm asking is this, Am I being too harsh in
telling a guy to back off who's trying to repay
former kindness. If I'm not out of line telling him
to back off, how can we ask him to stop
with the gifts without destroying the friendship? And there is
an update and boyle boy, do I have thoughts? But Angio,

(20:22):
let's hear what you have to say.

Speaker 6 (20:24):
One of the comments, actually, if you scroll up a
little bit, Dakota hates Dogzekiel. He's doing her past kindness
as a sign of affection, So that I think is
one way that it could be going.

Speaker 1 (20:34):
It was her parents that, you know, overall, like let
him in true?

Speaker 6 (20:38):
Sure, how old is see when that happened again.

Speaker 1 (20:40):
They were in high school. It was pretty early on too.
I think I think it was like freshmen or they
were young teenagers.

Speaker 6 (20:46):
I could see him catch and feelin's back there for sure.

Speaker 1 (20:49):
I don't know.

Speaker 6 (20:49):
I think like you can just have a real conversation
with him and be like, I don't know, I feel
like you can't just say like no, you have to
stop the gifts. Maybe you can phrase it in a
way where it's like like, hey, I understand that you
wouldn't repay me. I appreciate that so much. You don't
have to stop doing that, but maybe let's find a
different way to do that.

Speaker 1 (21:08):
Yeah, like give me like a CD.

Speaker 6 (21:10):
Yeah, or maybe like invite my husband to things like yes, hi,
my husband, like you know, maybe it's time or you know,
you guys, I don't know, he cooks food or something,
you know, something like different than just like material things.

Speaker 1 (21:28):
Maybe Liz is gonna have to cause you know, you
can't be like back off, like that's the wrong move.
But also Liz has to be like, hey, so are
you like pretending my husband doesn't exist? Because you know,
instead of spending two thousand dollars on like a handbag
and a pair of shoes, you could spend two thousand

(21:49):
dollars on like I don't know, like a trip for
both of us, like me and my husband, or like yeah,
if you're really just trying to like repay me, like
me and my husband are a package deal.

Speaker 6 (21:58):
So yeah, I just feel like what would really like
mean something because it is hard to I feel like
I always go to like, no, you can't give me anything,
like you don't. But then it's awkward because it's like
when people are offering things like trying to do a
nice thing, it's like it's it's rejection to them that
you're just saying like no, I don't want your kindness

(22:18):
and whatever, and say like can you actually give me this,
rather than like him just kind of guessing with all
these material things that he like, right you know you
heard you mentioned, or designer things that people kind of
can say as a default that people would like, even
though it's not always someone's like cup of tea.

Speaker 1 (22:33):
Yeah, and if he's making a bunch of money, like
two grand for that might be just a drop of
the bucket for him. Sure, let's get back into this story.
Let's do it. Update. I've had a bunch of dms
asking for an update. Honestly, the whole thing got really
weird and confusing. I was trying to wait until things
became more clear and we had answers to what had happened.
But I'm not sure that will ever happen. Oh well,
the plot thickens. After posting, Liz told me that she

(22:56):
had decided to give back Jay's expensive Christmas gifts. She
until he posted on Instagram about being out in an
event at a local bar for the night, then drove
over to his house with a friend, and they left
the gifts by the front door with a note that said,
and this is paraphrased, Jay, thank you so much for
thinking of me this Christmas. While all the gifts you've
been giving me are generous, I feel bad taking them.

(23:17):
It was my parents who took you in back when
we were in school. I was just excited to live
with my friend. They're the ones who took care of you.
If you feel the need to give back, my parents
have always supported local charity. I'm sure they would be
happy to know you gave the amount of these gifts
in their honor. Beautiful perfect. She hoped this would end
things and he'd get the picture. I was doubtful. Around

(23:39):
two am that night, Presumably when he had got home
and saw the returned gifts, he started bombarding her with
text messages. They were all some combination of he was
such a good friend and she was lucky to have him.
He was going to give the gifts back because it
was false modesty that she was showing in not accepting them.
She should always expect gifts from him, and he would

(24:00):
always protect her and be her hero. It was really
weird and creepy. We were already asleep, and the messages
came in so quickly and repeatedly that it woke us up.
We agreed to try to go back to sleep and
deal with it all and in the morning. Luckily, we
were leaving early the next morning to see my family
for the holidays. On the way there, we worked together
to craft a final message to Jay. Liz told him

(24:22):
in the text that it seemed like he wanted a
deeper relationship than she did, that she was happy in
her relationship with me, and that she was blocking him
to give him time to sort out his feelings for her.
Thirty minutes after that, we got a notification from our doorbell.
I'll give you one guess who it was.

Speaker 6 (24:38):
He shows up, at their house. Oh my gosh.

Speaker 1 (24:42):
He came back a few hours later to bring the
gifts back. Then he came back again the next morning,
and then again that evening. Friends started saying that Jay
had reached out to ask where Liz was, saying he
was afraid for her safety. Luckily we didn't tell that
many people about our trip, and those who knew also
knew about Liz blocking Jay and all stonewalled him good. Still,

(25:02):
saying it was a stressful situation is a major understatement. Honestly,
the stress of it ruined our New Year's While in
my hometown, we visited my cousin, whose husband is a lawyer.
We asked about protective orders and he told us that, unfortunately,
for our state, there have to be threats of harm
or proof that he was stalking Liz. He says that
Jay's actions up to that point were not extreme enough,

(25:23):
but he encouraged us to save our video doorbell feed
and to keep a record of every interaction in case
things escalated. My parents let us stay in my hometown
an extra few days before going home, but eventually we
had to head back for a work event that Liz
had to go to. We were pretty nervous the first
few days at home, and I installed two extra cameras
outside our home with a wider view range than the

(25:45):
doorbell could offer. Luckily, we didn't hear anything from Jay.
After not hearing anything from or about him for about
two weeks, we couldn't tell if we had gotten lucky
or if something else was going on. While our closest
friends knew what was going on and all blocked Jay
when Liz did, we had some friends of friends that
Liz knew who were still close to him. We had

(26:08):
a close friend reach out to one of Jay's friends.
This guy said that no one had heard or seen
from Jay in about three weeks. He had missed two
parties he said he would be at, and hadn't posted
on socials for a while. Jay was the kind of
guy who would post on Insta three or four times
a week. I should have let the whole thing go
from there, but curiosity got the better of me. I
reached out to a friend in the middle of February

(26:29):
who works in the restaurant industry. I knew they had
been in conversations with Jay's new company about becoming a client.
This friend told me that they hadn't heard from Jay
in over a month, but that there was a rumor
going around that Jay's business partner and I guess the
entire new business was tied to some sketchy stuff and
a lot of the restaurants he knew of had gotten

(26:49):
cold feet. No one had heard from Jay in a while,
and this friend had not seen him at a recent
industry event. This caused one of our friends and me
to go into detective mode. Back when Jay had first
moved back to the area, a bunch of us were
invited over to a party at his house, which was
a huge mansion in a super wealthy area. Liz and

(27:10):
I were having a hard time remembering, but we feel
like he was telling people he had just bought it.
Let me guess, is my conspiracy.

Speaker 3 (27:16):
Let's hear it.

Speaker 1 (27:17):
Jay's business was funded by dirty money. And all of
his little gifts and all of his you know, his
mansion and all of his cool stuff. It's all bought
on credit, you know, so to speak. Or it's a rental. Right, Okay,
why are you giggling?

Speaker 6 (27:30):
What is I just think that's funny.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
I thought you were like tying that to something else
you might know.

Speaker 6 (27:35):
No, I just think that's funny. Yeah, I think you're
being funny and I'm laughing.

Speaker 1 (27:38):
Goda, It's like, why are you laughing?

Speaker 6 (27:40):
Is that allow?

Speaker 5 (27:41):
This is serious business, guys. I think that this is
all some sort of scheme for a money laundering thing, and.

Speaker 1 (27:48):
It's really serious. Last week, the friend who I've been
doing detective stuff with found that house on a website
full of luxury homes for long term rental. We checked
on Zillow and the house was last sold almost a
decade ago, so we don't think that he bought it
and rented it out. We looked up a news report
for when his company sold, and we didn't see his
name anywhere in the article. That being said the only

(28:11):
person it named was the CFO, so maybe he was
an owner. We can't figure it out, So that's it.
We don't have any answers for what happened to Jay.
We can't figure out if he was just a sketchy
guy whose new company had closed, or if he was
some kind of scam artist. Maybe he got kidnapped, yeah,
or maybe he's being held for ransom. And by the way,
we have a King's Ransom full episodes with stories just

(28:35):
like this. And you can listen to them. All you
gotta do is just go to Spotify and Apple podcasts, iHeartRadio,
wherever you listen to podcasts, just search. Okay, storytalk, do it.
The King's ransom is yours. We got a little bit
more story left. I think, Hey, Dap betrails Jay. I
hope they're not dangerous. Let's finish the story. Part of
me thinks that he got a payday and is probably
living in Costa Rica or something. But I wouldn't be

(28:56):
surprised if he had been telling stories the entire time.
Maybe we only owned a few shares in the company
so we had a bit of cash, but conflated his
role and his bank account. I don't think we will
ever have answers. On the plus side, it seems like
he's out of our lives, and while we're continuing to
keep an eye out, we're hoping we don't ever have
to see him again. And that is the end of

(29:17):
that story.

Speaker 6 (29:17):
That is the end.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
John Here, we're gonna get back to this juicy story,
but a quick three minute break of ads from our sponsors.
My husband wants to go on vacation with my brother
in law and do unspeakable things. I mean, I tell
you about it, but I there.

Speaker 3 (29:31):
I really wish I didn't have to make this post.
Here it goes. So me and my husband have been
happily married for about sixteen years, give or take. We
both have stable careers, good family life and are fairly fortunate,
despite the cost of living racking up in the UK
right now the beans and eggs are getting up. By
the way, this comes from Throwaway Canning nineteen hundred and

(29:52):
if you want to spake your own stories, go to
the r slash Okay story times uperate it. So we
have two boys, fifteen and ten mount and up until
this Saturday, I thought we had it pretty good. We
argue sometimes, of course, but it's never gotten too bad
that and we have pretty decent spicy sleep life. With
some explanation, but I will get into that. Long and

(30:13):
short is on Sunday, just after I dropped off our
boys at their friends, my husband asked me if we
could have the house alone, and more importantly, do I
have a minute? I said yes, and he sat me
down then got out this printed poster for some sort
of How did that not get blocked? What we have
gone this far and this word has not gone blocked.

(30:34):
I'm gonna say spicy party. Then got out this printed
poster for some sort of spicy party and started explaining
to me the concept of attracted to the same gendercation.
It's where straight men go to somewhere with sun, sand
and booze and become for the duration of the trip.

(30:55):
But that's fine because it doesn't actually count because what
happens on the vacation stays at the vacation. If you
sign up for this, you're no longer a straight man.

Speaker 1 (31:05):
Yeah, no, you're not be who you are.

Speaker 6 (31:08):
It's the second dam of pride.

Speaker 3 (31:11):
I was completely silent and mortified, even more so when
he said he was looking into a trip to you
Beat the next year with his brother in law, his
sister's husband, to experience it for himself. He's thirty five now.
When he finally let me speak, I just said, I
need him to be clear with me, is he attracted
to the same gender, because if yes, that's okay, but

(31:33):
you need to figure out what happens going forward. I
didn't let myself get angry or upset. I was just stunned.
He swore up and down he is not attracted to
the same gender, and he's one hundred percent attracted to women,
and of course he still loves me and her voice.
So I said, well, do you think you're by maybe?
He got very defensive, saying how I needed to drop
the accusations and that this is the beauty of the.

Speaker 1 (31:58):
This has to be written to be funny, right, because
that's hilarious.

Speaker 3 (32:02):
It allows strain men to experience hes without actually being
attracted to the same gender, and how it's like going
to an aquarium, and again he was adamant he doesn't
find men's bodies here Genitalia exciting at all, but he
needs to experience this apparently because he's excited. I said, well,
I'm not really comfortable because if he was by, this

(32:25):
would be explicitly cheating on me, and he got angry
and reiterated he's not because that's the beauty of the gacation,
et cetera. I just had enough and left the room.
I ignored him for the rest of the day, but
we spoke again at tea, where I again asked him
why he wants to do this so bad if he's

(32:46):
not attracted to the same gender. He said, how he's
interested in how you know men's life differ from straight men's.

Speaker 6 (32:53):
He's like, no, I'm just going under cover.

Speaker 1 (32:55):
Trying to unravel the secrets.

Speaker 3 (32:58):
And that unfortunately, oneation begins. It's simply impossible for a
man to resist, and he must surrender himself, mind, body,
and soul or be destroyed, be destroyed, become ashes. I'm
either going to submit or become ashes.

Speaker 1 (33:14):
Are there like trips marketed as this, because if there are,
we all need to go on them just to see it.
I want to see what happens if you get destroyed.
Do they just have like a beam that just deatomizes you.
I think we have.

Speaker 3 (33:26):
Another straight man who wants to go on the vation
everyone I do, but I don't want to touch any men.

Speaker 1 (33:31):
That's what he's saying.

Speaker 3 (33:32):
I can't really put into words how surreal it is,
because he was speaking on the matter factly, and he
again insists this is a thing that straight men do
all the time, and now he's actually doing it a
bit late. Yeah, they usually get started in their thirties.
I'm forty. I'm running out of time. I just said
to him, if he has any love for me, then

(33:54):
he can't go ahead with this, and if he does,
the marriage will be decimated. We didn't speak anymore after that.
Since then, he's mentioned no more of it. But somehow
this is what scares me a lot too. That decision
genuinely seems to be tearing him up. He didn't go
into work on Monday and only went in for half

(34:15):
a day yesterday because he told them he just felt
too ill. And he looks distraught every time I see him.

Speaker 1 (34:21):
Dude, what distraught? Because every time he sees you, he's like,
she's not a man, and it's like that's his own
thing to deal with.

Speaker 3 (34:28):
He's trying to make it seem like it's not about
to like him getting around. And two, I've never seen
anyone that missed a vagation, missed two days of work
because of how distraught they were. If this was just
a vacation, well.

Speaker 1 (34:39):
Yeah, it's not a vacation. It's acation. That's the beauty
of it.

Speaker 3 (34:42):
Like he was about to see like a bunch of
like dude's skinny dipping, and now he's like missing out
on it.

Speaker 1 (34:47):
He'll never know what he was gonna see now because
he's back to being lock me up, officer. I'm the
straight man.

Speaker 3 (34:52):
I really don't think he's holy though I can be
absolutely believe he's by but I'd rather we talk about
that healthy way rather than this incredibly weird denialism around
going on a spicy holiday to Ibita. Has anyone known
straight guys to do this and come back and just

(35:12):
go back into being straight, Like surely that can be
a thing that happens. I'm so out of depth here,
and I just don't know how did you even initiate
the conversation. For the record, I also haven't mentioned it
to his sister yet. I don't know how i'd even
break it to her. Thanks for any help. I just
don't know what to think. So being able to get

(35:34):
this out there has helped even a little bit. We
got netits and we got a PS. So, dude, I
don't even know what to say. This guy's trying to
cheat on you on a real level, Like.

Speaker 1 (35:45):
If you want to get through this with your husband,
it needs to not be about the ocasion anymore. It
needs to be about, Hey, I'm telling you that I
wouldn't find it okay for you to just go have
a little escapade with me and then just come back
and act like everything's cool. I understand the beauty of
the cation, but I don't want that for me since

(36:07):
I'm your wife, so it needs to be like a hey,
like I want you to feel like you're okay, right,
because clearly he's not all the way straight.

Speaker 6 (36:15):
Yeah, he's just repressing, like all of his emotions.

Speaker 1 (36:19):
And if he heard this right now, he'd just be screaming,
it's the beauty of the nation. What are you not understanding?
I'm not just want to spend a vacation with me.

Speaker 6 (36:28):
I think you have to say you can be my
husband if you're by, but you can't be my husband
if you.

Speaker 1 (36:33):
Cheat on me.

Speaker 3 (36:34):
If you go do this and come back Edits wow,
this blew up. This has been incredibly sobering, and I
think I've now confirmed, but I already knew to be
the case. The marriage has passed away one way or
another in a way I was in denial myself about that.
I've contacted my sister in law. She's an initially screamed
at me, calling me a liar, and even insinuated I

(36:56):
was trying to steal her husband. She rang me back
short after and admitted she was in deep, deep shock.
I've asked my parents to look after the boys and
we are going to meet tomorrow to discuss this deeper.
It just realized to me that, imagine this is happening
in your marriage. You contact your sibling and this is
happening in their marriage too. It's like we're the only

(37:18):
ones we got right now, dude, convenient or sat.

Speaker 5 (37:22):
I think it's definitely convenient. I think you definitely want
a close relative to lean on in that moment without
being like this is going to change how they think
about me forever.

Speaker 1 (37:31):
But it's like, no, your husband's doing it too. Oh
my god.

Speaker 3 (37:34):
I've also texted my husband and told him we need
to make alternative accommodation arrangements. But he will not be
sleeping here tonight, and I will have a bag and
he will be waiting for him. Not sure if the
mods want to lock the post. Blah blah blah. Thank
you all for those words, especially Champion Fly, who already
gave me the good dose of reality I needed. Ps
to see a lot of people asking about the aquarium

(37:57):
and at risk of doxing on myself, there's a pretty
famous aquarium here in the UK called The Deep. At
the very end, you walk through a tunnel that generally
goes underneath the main fish tank, and it's quite immersive.
I suppose my husband explained the aquarium thing, and it's
a bit like that. You go there and you observe
the fishes, and you even get a bit close up,

(38:18):
but you never actually enter the waters, get emotionally invested,
or become a fish, so it doesn't really count. I
don't think there's gonna be glass, you know, protecting you
from all the dudes out there.

Speaker 1 (38:29):
I think I'm starting to understand what they're trying to say.
I'm not sold on it.

Speaker 5 (38:33):
What this guy's saying is, he's like, I'm just gonna
go beat and then not care that I was and
not ever be again.

Speaker 1 (38:43):
That's what he's saying.

Speaker 3 (38:44):
He can't come back to a marriage after that.

Speaker 1 (38:45):
Of course not.

Speaker 3 (38:46):
So it's just insanity. This is a very bizarre anialogy.
And I pointed out that it makes no sense, but
he just got more in a huff about it. But
how I just don't get it, and frankly I still don't,
and I want to get to the update. Your husband
isn't proposing again, and he's proposing cheating on you with
men while you're using magical thinking to pretend it doesn't count.

(39:09):
The fact that he's planning this with his sister's husband
even makes it more disturbing. His bizarre explanation about surrendering mind, body,
and soul isn't straight man curiosity. It's someone desperately trying
to justify exploring his spicy related reality while keeping his
heterospicy marriage together. His depression about not being able to

(39:31):
go isn't about missing a vacation. It's about being forced
to confront his without his convenient What happens in Ibita
stays in a beta excuse his meltdown, however, is not
going to show how desperately he wants to avoid facing
his reality. Opie says, I've read over this multiple times,
and I guess the worst part is how I know

(39:54):
you're completely right. Opie should consider about the divorce. Opie says,
I want to avoid the devorce option, but I guess
that's the only option, isn't it coming to two? Says
so this is just a thought, But I'm wondering if
he's really planning on do indication or if it was
just to cover try to get you to agree to it.
What if the real plan was to get with women

(40:16):
while he's down there?

Speaker 6 (40:17):
That would be a crazy plan. He's stupid if that
was his plan, or.

Speaker 1 (40:23):
Is he so genius that we just can't comprehend the
true brilliance we're seeing right now. He's like, Babe, I
just want to go be with men. She'll never expect
they're actually women.

Speaker 3 (40:37):
Obi says that I hadn't really thought of, to be honest,
and now the thought terrifies me. From the way he's
talking about men, the fact that he had a poster
for Ationian Spicy Party. I mean, it's one heck of
abof Sureley coming to three. Tell him you're gonna have
a straightcation while he's gone, and if you're going to

(40:58):
surrender mind, body, and soul to other men, honest to god,
if my husband proposes to me, I've used his time
away to back up, move out, and have divorce papers
waiting for him. We got an update.

Speaker 1 (41:08):
Yeah, I agree with that one hundred percent. It's interesting
that this could be a completely different conversation if their
partner was like actually approaching it from an honest perspective,
which is like a really hard, vulnerable thing to do
to go to your partner and be like, hey, so
I think I'm like maybe into men, but I also
am your husband, and we have kids, and I love you,
and I just don't know what's going on. Then that's

(41:30):
a completely different thing. Being like I'm gonna go on, Acsian.
You have to be okay with it. Worst possible way
you could go about that.

Speaker 3 (41:36):
Him saying he's late to it is him saying I've
been in closet for a while now.

Speaker 1 (41:41):
I should have been going to this for years.

Speaker 3 (41:43):
Anyways. Update, So when I last posted, I contacted my
husband to tell him he want to be staying at
home tonight and a bag will be waiting for him.
As you can imagine, we argued quite badly. I won't
go into those specific details, but now I'm one hundred
percent on board with the fact minimum he's by might
even be together. We've had arguments in the past, but

(42:06):
I've genuinely never seen him have such a childish transfrent
before screaming about how I just don't understand theation. Absolutely
despite that phrase now and insinuating I'm actually a closet
officer because I refuse to allow him to participate in
his cultural exchange with the community.

Speaker 1 (42:25):
Cultural exchange more like a fluid exchange.

Speaker 3 (42:27):
Dude, what are you talking about a lot of you
said to ask me if i'd be accepted if the
roles were in reverse, and I did say it would
be acceptable if I went and slept with other guys
during that week, like clockwork. He was very angry and offended,
saying it's completely different because sho means nothing. What happens
in the stays on the et cetera, and so it

(42:49):
doesn't actually really count. When you go to Vegas and
lose all your money, that doesn't stay in Vegas. That
debt follows you out of Vega.

Speaker 1 (42:56):
The money that you lost stays in Vegas. The debt
doesn't the debt, whereas I just be straight up cheating. Well,
I turned it around on him. No, but if you
see what happens in Manchester stays in Manchester, doesn't actually
mean anything. Doesn't it count. It's like bird watching. And
I think it got through to him. He went all
quiet and then started crying, admitting he thought of me

(43:19):
sleeping with another man is destroying his heart. But relationships
need sacrifices. So he had agreed volunteers that when he
goes on the occasion, I'll get one week in Manchester
to do whatever I want.

Speaker 3 (43:31):
He doesn't want me to, but that's what's fair. In
a twisted way, he supposed I told him to get
out of my house. Thankfully he left without the fight.
I know it's incredibly petty, but I also drained the
joint bank account in legal ind UK so he couldn't
try to use it against me. In about an hour,
I got a call from his mom, my mother in law,

(43:51):
who also screamed and screamed about me being a cheating
or how I was horrible, what about the kids, et cetera.
When I find got my composure back, I just said,
ask her son about the getion obvious. At first she
got angry, but I said no, just ask him about
the nation. He'll explain. She called me an effing joke
and hung up, and guess what. Later on it getting

(44:12):
into the evening, I got another phone call from her
in floods of tears. She was very apologetic, and I
told her she doesn't need to be the one to apologize.
She was also upset. She put father in law on
the phone, who, while he sounded calm, I just sort
of could tell he was on a war path. Again,
very apologetic, and he overheard that phrase asked my husband,

(44:35):
and husband initially said no, it's nothing, before explaining how
it's a modern thing men do, et cetera, and gave
them the same spill about what happens on the gation
man cannot resist the how a man must surrender to
the chen et cetera. Father in law just said they
told him to leave or they'd call the police. He
didn't care where he goes, but he wasn't staying there.

(44:57):
Husband tried to call me while I was on the phone,
but I just ignored it. And Vade law just said
he was sorry for me and that they have my
corner in this. So that's one thing. Oh wait, now
we're getting to the brother in law here. Oh no, God,
I forgot. I just want to know how he came
across this and where this all began. I mean, I'm
sure this all began a long time ago. Like got

(45:17):
a water cooler at work like that, were at office
and Bill came by.

Speaker 1 (45:21):
He's like, hey, you ever heard of it? I talked
to Sharon about it.

Speaker 3 (45:24):
She let me go.

Speaker 1 (45:25):
I'll tell you it was a crazy experience. I'm the
straightest man on earth.

Speaker 4 (45:28):
Though.

Speaker 1 (45:28):
It's still kind of tragic because he's clearly like a
bye man.

Speaker 5 (45:31):
He's not like he doesn't feel like he can do that,
and a marriage is dissolving before her eyes. And this
is why it's important if you feel like you have
like a truth, to not like ignore it or bury
it or lie about it, because if you do, you'll
end up in a point where you're forty two and
now you're telling your wife you have to Cashin.

Speaker 3 (45:47):
Told him to be there for their daughter because it
sounds like brother in law is involved. Husband didn't tell
him that, and valld in law just said he had
to go because he was so, so, so so angry.
I got to text him, my husband after the phone call,
which was all weirdly rambily saying how I'd mistraded the
tion to destroy his marriage and destroy his life, and

(46:08):
again insinuated I and his parents were closet officers for
doing such a thing.

Speaker 6 (46:14):
He's like, I'm not, but you guys are being not
to me because I'm not.

Speaker 1 (46:20):
I'm not.

Speaker 3 (46:22):
I just want to go on the cash told him
we talk when he grows up, and blocked his number.
I took a day off work to have to myself
the locks have been changed this morning and that's five
hundred pounds gone. Woo did you call? How many locks
do you have in your house? But whatever, at least
I know he won't be coming back. I'm going to
look into how I can proceed with a divorce and
then we'll move from there. Oh, of course there is

(46:44):
the brother in law. So I haven't yet met with
sister in law. She was in such a stay and
has taken this far worse than I have, for reasons
that will be clear soon. We're going to try maybe tomorrow.
But we did talk over the phone, and I evesdropped
on the conversation with her husband, or she put her
on the phone on speaker and I went on mute.

(47:05):
Her husband got home early. She made him come home
and told him there was an emergency. It just said
to him, can you please explain what a caation is?
She told me afterwards. She was praying he'd look confused
or just be like what or anything, but instead he
just sat her down and explained that a gig it's

(47:25):
a new thing where straat men go spots to participate
in spicy sleep acts. But it doesn't count because there's
no investment, and because what happens on the stays on
the occasion. This is like whatever, going like door to
door and being like the same spiel, like a salesman,
Can I talk to you today about your Lord and

(47:47):
Savior on thecation?

Speaker 1 (47:48):
The new thing?

Speaker 3 (47:49):
Straight men, go on.

Speaker 1 (47:50):
You're not the first guy to come around this place
I'm in. That's the sales principle. You wear them down.
It feels like these two guys just want to go
be each other and they're trying to come up with
some other thing where it's like, all right, well maybe
if we're strangers, then our families will be okay with it,
which is the most insane thing ever.

Speaker 5 (48:09):
But you know what, maybe they're just in love, because
when you're in love, you think and do really dumb
stuff sometimes conspiracy theory.

Speaker 3 (48:16):
This whole story is an ad for He said, like
riding down angry thoughts and then putting them in a drawer.
You never have to see them again the whole time,
sister in laws and tears as he just calmly bats
off same points my husband did about how it doesn't count,
and he did the whole it's impossible to resist. You
must surrender or be destroyed. Crap. I seriously think they

(48:40):
must be speaking to a dominatrix or something, or even
male doms because surely neither of them are into that
to act make that up on their own. I don't
really want to go into what was discussed for her sake,
but it did become very apparent to me that brother
in law is into I pocorn and at times conflated

(49:01):
with the concept of a There was this utterly surreal
moment where Sishemla was just trying to wrap her head
around this while also in floods of tears, and he
explains so generally so a matter of factually, for that
most mention is either a one time annual thing. But
some men go to the cation for years and simply

(49:24):
never returned because they use the hypnosis and mind control
to be totally feminized in a state of permanent pseudo.

Speaker 5 (49:33):
That might take the cake for the most insane thing
I've ever heard.

Speaker 3 (49:37):
This guy was like watching way more YouTube videos than
Opi Husman was.

Speaker 4 (49:42):
How is he.

Speaker 1 (49:42):
Still calling it pseudo? If you get lost there?

Speaker 5 (49:46):
He's like, yes, some people never leave because they're the brainwashed.

Speaker 6 (49:51):
They're internalizing this.

Speaker 1 (49:53):
Be instead of do all this and deny that it
makes you. I think that's even anyways, She said to disbelieve. Surely,
if you're taking it up the butt willingly because you
want to, that makes you attracted to the same gender.
And he said no, because that's the beauty of the
You can do all of this, but you don't interact

(50:14):
with the wider experience. So I just want to let
you know that I can be intimate with another woman,
and then if I can't be like, I'm still just
totally one percent only because I wasn't committed to that woman.
You could do that when you're straight too.

Speaker 3 (50:32):
She asked him if the sissy stuff is what he wanted,
and he said not on a long term basis, and
was adamant this is something all straightmen do. But she
wouldn't get it because she's a woman. Dude, now we're
throwing in some some jabs. You wouldn't get it. Woman,
What is it?

Speaker 1 (50:49):
The all men? What is that? Where did they read this?

Speaker 5 (50:51):
They like sent each other like a meme on Instagram,
and then it turned into.

Speaker 3 (50:55):
This, I cannot wait for some memes now. Then there
were more in seas of well that marriage is passed
away too. I suppose the whole ordeal ended when she
said to him, he asked a choice to make, and
he said, no, he doesn't need to make this choice
because the beauty of the cation that allows him to

(51:15):
keep his marriage, because it doesn't count.

Speaker 6 (51:18):
He's like, no, you don't understand. You're not allowed to
divorce because it doesn't count.

Speaker 5 (51:22):
It's in the terms and agreements. I have legal documentation
and they gave me a little form. It's like getting
your parking validated exactly. She said, that's not the choice.
The choice is whether he's leaving the house that night
or she is. The only good thing he did was
leave me. And sister in law spoke about it after,
and I'm just still utterly stunned. I understand she's gone

(51:44):
to her parents for support. What exactly did we do
to have our lives destroy it in such an abrupt, bizarre,
embarrassing way. Personal advice, I'm going to look at devices
and base statements to see if I can find definitive
proof of cheating. After that, I.

Speaker 3 (51:58):
Suppose I have to figure out to tell the boys
why their father won't be going home because he's going
to they for years now. And by the way, you
can ride home with your favorite freaking podcast by going
to your favorite podcast platform, searching up Okay Storytime on Apple,
iHeartRadio or Spotify, and you can go all the way
home listening to more crazy stories like this gacation.

Speaker 1 (52:19):
It's the beauty of thecation.

Speaker 3 (52:21):
Yeah, it's the beauty of Okay Storytime. We got an edit,
We got a little bit left here.

Speaker 1 (52:24):
You got to give yourself up to it entirely or
it will destroy you.

Speaker 5 (52:27):
But yeah, any other thoughts, fellas is it straight to
beis with that man's arguing, but be honest with your partners,
because like, I really do think there was a way
he could have expressed, like I feel uncertain about my
sexuality all of a sudden, like not even all of
a sudden, Like I don't know how I could have
told this to you.

Speaker 1 (52:43):
It's like an impossible thing to say.

Speaker 5 (52:45):
If he comes from it from like a real vulnerable place,
like that's still an incredibly difficult conversation. But it's like
you're at least coming from a real place. This is nonsense.

Speaker 3 (52:54):
Edit spoke to other system law. My husband's family is
older sister, him, younger sister. Original sister in law gave
her a skimmed down version. She asked her husband and
thankfully he was deeply confused, but mentioned about two years
ago at a birthday party, he was approached by my
husband and brother in law about signing up to some
online boot camp around fifty shades club cross dressing. He

(53:18):
assumed they were taking the piss out of him and
told them to f off, and never really thought of
it again. The fact that this has been going on
for that long is making me want to throw up.
For the poster who said about divorce options, I'm actually
going to look into adultery because, plain and simple, that
is what it is. And that is the end of
that story. Holy gal, They've been trying for years.

Speaker 1 (53:39):
Human psychology is incredibly complex, so there's no way to
get to the bottom of this without real conversation. But
you can't have real conversation with him right now anyway,
because he's in dulululand he truly believes that that's the
beauty of the gay cation is that you just get
to do a like free trial on being gay. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (53:58):
But if you go there and you become attached, Yeah,
what if you want to like continue your trial? Yeah,
but that's you know that story.

Speaker 1 (54:05):
Hey, it's sam og Hos. We're going get back to
these delectable stories. But here's three minutes of ads from
our sponsors to help support the show.

Speaker 6 (54:12):
I want to leave my fiance because her family is unbearable.

Speaker 1 (54:17):
Bears, Lions, Tigers, What's next.

Speaker 6 (54:19):
I've been dating my fiance for four years and I've
been engaged for seven months. We are trying to plan
out a wedding for roughly fall next year. By the way,
this comes from deleted and if you want to submit
your own stories, go to the r slash okay story
times sepreddit. So her childhood was terrible and harmful. To
put it mildly, her parents were reaching self absorbed people,
and she was the scapegoat for her two brothers. She

(54:41):
was mistreated and thrown out the moment she turned eighteen.
She was, however, a great student and a hard worker,
so with some scholarships and a part time job, she
has built a great career and is pretty independent. The
problem is, though, that she still has contact with her
family and none of them have changed. Well, actually something
has changed. They have become more financially dependent on her.

(55:01):
Great they enjoy slowly creeping back into her life and
emotionally blackmailing her for support for or whatever she can do.
They're not pleasant about it either. They're rude, smug, and
generally enjoy being a nuisance. And my fiance can't say no,
no matter the horrible things they say, or how they
outright try and intimidate her openly. I've always known her

(55:24):
family history and have always supported her through the issues
with them. But in the last year or so they
have become far more brazen and asinine. They've come over
to my house more often. They make messes all around
the place. Her mother acts like she's the effing stepmother
from Cinderella. Her dad drinks all of my effing adult
soda and empties out half of the fridge. Her brothers

(55:46):
stop by occasionally to act as mouthpieces for their parents.
They practically trash the place and leave us to clean
the mess.

Speaker 1 (55:53):
Hey, have we heard of locks? There are these things
you can put on your doors and then people can't
come in unless they have the key.

Speaker 6 (56:00):
Great investment, I would say, and where is my fiance?
And all this quietly standing in the corner are practically shaking.
I'm no fool here. There is legitimate trauma. There's her
need to feel loved by them, and her hoping that
they will appreciate her.

Speaker 1 (56:14):
Before one of you.

Speaker 6 (56:14):
Noble commenters states the obvious. She's been in therapy for
this for years. I've tried to establish boundaries for nearly
two years. I've been trying to push these booty clowns away.
But this is her house she purchased, and no matter
the contributions financial or otherwise, she won't let me have
a say on who comes into her house. She's been
beaten down mentally and emotionally by them for so long.

(56:37):
She has also told me recently that she wants to
earn their approval and that they were right about her,
that she needs to be better for them. I've had
too many emotional conversations with tears and begging to count,
hoping that she will take the steps to get better.
But she's an adult. I can't force her to do anything.
I love her, but I can't help feel so resentful

(56:58):
of what she's doing. It's agonizing watching someone you love,
someone who you know deserves so much better, openly destroy
themselves for people like her family. It's been painful watching
her cry herself to sleep one too many nights because
of them. I've tried too many times to help her
get out of their clutches. But I have to think
of the future. What happens when we have kids, What
happens when she is postpartum and invites them over, what

(57:19):
happens if there's a medical emergency for either of us.
What if our finances get tight and they still demand money.
This is the in law family from heck, and I
won't be able to avoid them. Tomorrow, I'm going to
tell her how I want to delay the wedding until
firm boundaries are established. If she resents that, I walk.
I can't do it anymore. I refuse to watch a

(57:40):
slow death like this any further. And we do have
a small update, shall we discuss before we get into that.

Speaker 1 (57:46):
It makes sense that you're at a breaking point here,
but I don't think ultimatums seldom will work in these scenarios.
You know, like now you're just going to your wife
or your fiance who's in a in fear like you said,
she's like she shit in the corner like that, she's
in a fear response, and you're trying to be like, well,
I know you're you know, afraid of your family and

(58:07):
your parents, but I'm going to now use fear to
try to get you to leave them because I'm basically
threatening you with me leaving.

Speaker 6 (58:16):
Yeah, I mean, I don't know if Op was gonna
tell her about that. I think that I might have
just been like his own kind of boundaries to himself.

Speaker 1 (58:24):
Why you'd have to you gotta be like, hey, it's
now you have to choose them or me. And I
think it needs to be more like he said, like,
I cannot see you this way. It's destroying me, right
think about our kid did potentially?

Speaker 6 (58:36):
No, Absolutely, I mean I think what he's bringing up
is definitely valid. I just don't think making an ultimatum necessarily, like,
because I feel like to make it an ultimatum, you
would have to like tell her about it and be like, hey, like,
if you don't do this, then I'm gonna leave.

Speaker 1 (58:47):
Did he not say at the end he said, I'm
gonna go to her and say it's either they stop
coming or I'm out.

Speaker 6 (58:52):
Not necessarily he said, if she resents that, I walk. Oh, Okay,
he does have that boundary. He's not necessarily gonna come
her and be like I'm gonna blay this out. You
have to think about it. But if the answer isn't
what I want.

Speaker 3 (59:05):
I'm out of here, you know what I mean.

Speaker 6 (59:06):
I feel like if you say that ahead of time,
then it's not then it is an ultimatom. But if
you kind of just keep that to yourself, then it's
not like.

Speaker 1 (59:12):
He knows she's gonna pick them. She's not in a
place where she's able to not pick them because she's
in like a fear response. You're not gonna solve this
with anything but love.

Speaker 6 (59:21):
That is just so hard because in those kind of
manipulative like situations, it's like it's really up to the
victim to get themselves out of there, and that's the
hardest thing to do. But there is an update, so
let's see what happens. So we have a small update.
I talked to her and it went about as well
as one could possibly expect. Currently getting myself set up

(59:42):
in a hotel for a few days and working on
a possible long term plan for moving out. Still a
lot going on right now, but maybe sometime next week
I'll be able to put everything together into one update.
And we do have an update. So okay, so it
looks like right now is getting distance from himself. Let's
see what is going the night after I made the

(01:00:04):
first post, I had decided that I was going to
have a heart to heart with my fiance about her family. However,
she came back from work the next day early and
I was already off that day, so I initiated the
talk a little sooner than I planned. Essentially, I told
her about how this arrangement was not sustainable. I did
not feel comfortable marrying her due to how much involvement
in her life her family has, and I certainly did

(01:00:24):
not feel comfortable bringing a child into this world with them.
I didn't want to tell her to go cold turkey,
no contact with them, but strict limitations to start with
on them coming over and what they can do around
the house. I also requested couple therapy before marriage. She
wasn't happy. She was just staring angrily at me while
I spoke, and then started yelling at me when I finished.

Speaker 1 (01:00:44):
Oh no, I wonder where she learned that behavior.

Speaker 6 (01:00:48):
Yeah, she told me, I don't understand their dynamic, and
it worked for her. I told her that there are
harmful users who will bleed her dry, and I have
never seen them show any decency towards her. She told
me that she just had to work harder for them
to appreciate her. I basically yelled at her that a
parent's child shouldn't have to beg and plead and work
for them to be loved. I finally told her that

(01:01:09):
she sets limits with them or I walk. She was livid,
and since I was living in her house, I was
punted out. So the past few days I have been
staying in a hotel and have had my stuff taken
out and put into storage, and frankly, it's been great.
I'm going to stay with the family for a few
weeks around mid July, and after that I'm going to
go house searching for myself. I've spent the last couple
days relaxing, catching up on movies and video games that

(01:01:31):
I haven't had time for, and could go back from
work to a quiet room without her family tearing the
place apart. Yesterday, however, things came to a head. We
have basically been no contact since she booted me out,
but I know every Saturday her family loves to spend
the afternoon over and she uses me as a shield
from there. However, in a very petty move, I simply

(01:01:51):
kept my phone muted all day and played disco elysium.
I knew she would call back for help with her family,
and at this point, pure resentment was kicking in for her,
and I wanted nothing to do with her issues. By
the end of the night, she had sent me over
a dozen texts and finally two frantic voicemails begging me
to come home. I decided to come over and check

(01:02:11):
up on her. Long story short, she was sobbing in
the living room, and when I came back to talk
to her, she was practically crushing my back, hugging me,
and sobbing. I gave her time to cool off and
asked what happened. Long story short, her parents and brother
came by to grift money from her and say a
horrible crap to her. She wanted to have me come
over to help, but I was ignoring her. And when
she tried to have one of her friends help out
and everyone basically said if that, it all started clicking

(01:02:35):
in for her. Okay, she punted her family out, but
not before they said some utterly vile crap to her
that I won't repeat. She kept apologizing to me and
told me over and over to come home. I told
her plainly that I had started to build up heavy
resentment towards her for some time, and while I loved
her and understand it was trauma and not her being
outright harmful, there was major issues that would need to

(01:02:58):
be addressed if we were to move forward. And here
are the issues. We got them laid out. She sells
the house and moves. We make roughly the same amount
of money, and we will buy a house together. I
am a grown but man, and I will not live
in a house. I have no equal agency over her
family will never step foot in it. They will never
come over. They will be treated by me in a

(01:03:19):
very threatening manner if they try and come in. She
gets a new therapist and we start pre marital counseling
nice like what we were.

Speaker 1 (01:03:26):
Saying, sometimes you just gotta try a new one.

Speaker 6 (01:03:29):
And give it a shot. She never makes me interact
with her family. We will go low contact with her
family right now, but make no mistake, we are working
towards full no contact on her end. I told her
I love her, We have been together for a while
now and have beautiful memories together, and I know she
is suffering from it, but these are non negotiable, and
if she has a problem with any of them, then
we have to go our separate ways. She told me

(01:03:50):
that she's realized for a while now that her family
is toxic and unhealthy, and she wants to make changes.
She has accepted, but some of these will take a
while to see through. Now, I'm going to stay in
the hotel until I head back to stay with my family.
She is welcome to come over, but I have many
clear that her house is not somewhere that I want
to go. Her and I are both off tomorrow, so
we will spend the day here and maybe go out.

(01:04:13):
This is obviously not over yet, but I might not
post anything else until mid August or so. And guess
what we have the second post, we have another update.

Speaker 1 (01:04:22):
I'm applausing low key. Kind of a brilliant move Biop there.

Speaker 6 (01:04:26):
Honestly, she had to find out for herself and she did.

Speaker 1 (01:04:28):
Yeah, and I bet it hurt. I'm sure it hurt.
But like dude, there's times where people need cold water
and you could not give it to her with words,
so she had to just experience it with no buffer.
Clearly you had you know, you're emotionally drained from all
this because you've been the buffer. You've been playing defense.
You were the goalie for all of their toxic crap,
so you were just getting hit by it all the time, right.

Speaker 6 (01:04:50):
And you were doing, you know, the right decision for
the both of you or for whoever would be in
that situation and leaving. And so when she saw that,
she's like, wait, what we can do that? No, really,
no way, And it's like, yeah, you can, It's available,
It's available to you.

Speaker 1 (01:05:06):
It's an option, Yeah for sure.

Speaker 6 (01:05:08):
But yeah, this is going great, very difficult things happening.

Speaker 1 (01:05:11):
I think Op did say, like, I think what I
did might have been cruel. I kind of agree, but
it's nowhere near as cruel as what her family was doing.

Speaker 6 (01:05:19):
Yeah, no, not at all though.

Speaker 1 (01:05:20):
It's like the lesser of two evils, and really, and
it's not come from a bad place. You're not doing
it out of spite. You were doing it out of
I hope she freaking sees now, yeah, that they're not
good and this does not work for her. Yeah that
was so delusional. Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 6 (01:05:34):
But on to update number two. So, despite all intentions
of not updating until much later, with the hopes of
an improved relationship with my fiance and her establishing boundaries
with their toxic family.

Speaker 1 (01:05:45):
We are now broken.

Speaker 6 (01:05:47):
No, that is not what I was looking for. Essentially,
what happened was after last weekend, where I left her
for the time to deal with them herself. She seemed
to finally grasp the situation and was open to changes,
including boundaries and a possible move. We spent Monday and
Tuesday hanging out in my hotel that I was staying
in until I went back to my family for a
couple of weeks. The other night, she was being very

(01:06:08):
vague with texting. When she originally was supposed to come over.
She came much later than expected, and I knew something
was up. She basically unloaded on me how I was harmful, controlling,
overly demanding, and unsupportive. It took me five effing seconds
to figure out she was repeating verbatim some sort of
rehashed speech from her parents, and to be honest, I

(01:06:28):
was so agitated at this point, despite making a huge
gamble on her, I decided to be a prick about it.
I asked her if her family told her to say this.
She said that they suggested it to her, but she
came up with it herself.

Speaker 1 (01:06:41):
Yeah, so wait, this the family that suggested this to you,
They're not controlling. The ones who put the words in
your mouth aren't controlling you.

Speaker 6 (01:06:47):
I asked her to explain in detail what I did,
and she said I was living like a parasite off
of her. I reminded her that I'm paying fifty to
fifty for her effing mortgage, fifty to fifty for utilities
and groceries as well. I have my own car. I
pay for a job that makes just about as much
as hers, unlike her effing leech parents who demand payments

(01:07:07):
on the weekly and raid the kitchen on the weekends.
I told her to try again with something better. She
looked flustered and said I was trying to isolate her.
This is so frustrating.

Speaker 1 (01:07:17):
Just let it go. You know, she needs to work
on her situation with herself and her family before she
can ever be ready to be in a committed relationship
with another person.

Speaker 6 (01:07:25):
I kind of smirked like a donkey and told her
that I have always supported her many friendships that she
has destroyed on her own because no one wants to
deal with her family or be used as a shield
like me. I was practically demanding to know at this
point why she is so hell bent on destroying her
life for these people. She just kind of shouted that
I don't understand her family and that she's just trying

(01:07:46):
to earn their love back, and was basically ranting at
that point. It's just so staggering to see up close.
I have ventured into a few subreddits to get perspectives,
and if you have any familiarity with them, you'll see
how people who are victims by their own family can
be so utterly broken by it that it'll wreck their
brain to where they truly believe that they are the
problem and that they deserve Well, that's how she was.

(01:08:09):
She was utterly broken and didn't want help. She didn't
want to get better, She just wanted to get worse.
It hit me like a truck, honestly, the realization I
really did feel like a fool for trying, even if
it was what I was supposed to do in the
first place. She was practically berserk at this point, and
I just was mentally exhausted and needed her to leave
before someone called the police. She finally left, but I

(01:08:30):
had a few concerned neighbors check on me. Some of
her friends are aware as they have messaged me checking
on the situation. I told them the truth and that
I just needed to be alone to think what to
do next. Right now, they have revealed that she has
given them similar rants after expressed concern for her. One
had even heard that she may be possibly at risk
of losing her job. She is definitely having some sort

(01:08:50):
of mental break. From my understanding, she is now completely isolated.
She is actually sprinting into a horrible, lonely life right now.
There's nothing I can do for her at this point,
and as selfish as it sounds, I'm just glad it's
going to be behind me. And we do have another update,
but that is such a rough one. So update number three,
things have kind of wrapped up, but there were some

(01:09:12):
loose ends. I completely forgot to change my mailing address,
which I should have done asap, so a couple of
important things got sent to her house. I had to
go pick them up, plus a final couple items that
I want for my move that I left there and
decided that I wanted to actually take. She was being
difficult and not responding to messages in regards to them,
so I had to go get them from her myself.

(01:09:33):
I brought a mutual friend just in case. Thankfully, she
was at least cooperative and letting me get my stuff,
and it wasn't much of an issue. Everything else was, though.
She had a lot of nasty things to say, telling
me that she was already sleeping around, telling me how
happy she was now that I was gone, telling me
she's finally free of me, how she's going to be

(01:09:54):
so much better off without me, a lot of generic
insults and horrible things that you would commonly expect from
an breakup. And you know what, it was so effing
obvious that it was a rehashed script from her family,
and you could easily see how miserable she was. She
looked like a mess, like she hasn't slept in days.
The house was a mess. She wasn't even yelling it.

(01:10:15):
She sounded so exhausted and broken when she said it.
Oh my gosh, it was painful. She didn't even smile
when she said anything, just a face contort it and
hate and anger. She was not the woman I knew anymore.
That person was gone. When I was getting ready to leave,
she was still going on. I was fed up and
told her something along the lines of congratulations. Your friends

(01:10:36):
are gone, your human shields are gone, your engagement is over,
your support is gone. Anyone whoever treated you like a
decent human being is gone. It's just you and your family.
Hope you're happy while they bleed you dry. Probably didn't
go like that, but something like it. And she just
stood there, literally just stood there and looked at me
with indifference and walked away. As I walked out the door.

(01:10:58):
As we were leaving, the mutual friend, Tip asked if
I was okay. I reassured her that I was, and
I'm just trying to get myself set up to go
home next week. She also confirmed that she hears that
my ex did lose her job for not showing up
for several days and basically ghosted them. They're going to
try an intervention next week and asked if I could participate,
But I'm not delaying my travel because, frankly, I just

(01:11:19):
want a clean break.

Speaker 1 (01:11:20):
Yeah, you don't want me there?

Speaker 6 (01:11:22):
Yeah, I think he said what he needed to.

Speaker 1 (01:11:24):
It's just I don't think his presence is going to
promote cool heads.

Speaker 3 (01:11:28):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (01:11:29):
I know for a fact that if I stay involved,
I'm only going to be witnessing the slow descent to
either a full break or self harm. I just can't
do that. Despite all this, I'm actually excited for the future,
and I have realized that I ignored way too many
red flags at the beginning. Even with everything that happened,
I know I'll be doing good and I am going
to be all right. I expect this to be my

(01:11:50):
final update. I'm still in town until Sunday afternoon, so
something could happen while I'm still here, but if anything does,
it won't be exciting. But we do have another update.
Oh god, it just keeps going.

Speaker 1 (01:12:02):
Okay. I'm still holding out hope that this ends with like,
you know, complete cutting off of the family and like
just a complete wake up call.

Speaker 6 (01:12:12):
There's more to the story, so it's possible.

Speaker 1 (01:12:14):
This is a lesson though that there's sometimes nothing you
personally can do in a situation where even if he didn't,
you know, lean into the negativity or come at her foul,
you know, whatever you want to call it. I don't
know if he had the tool kit to address the
issues she's going through.

Speaker 6 (01:12:32):
Yeah, it's very complicated and very dependent on the person
in the situation for sure, and not just an easy
thing to just like come up with in your brain.
You need to like study this stuff for sure. But
we do have another update, so update number four. I'm
currently back in my home, stay with my family, refamiliarizing
myself with the area. I have one hundred percent decided

(01:12:53):
to stay here permanently, and I'm starting the long process
of looking up homes in the area. I've been doing
great and hanging out with friends and fans. A couple
of mutuals with my ex fiance have let me know
what's been happening, and things finally seem to be getting better. Okay,
the plan was for an intervention on Sunday, but Saturday night,
after her family visited again, she called friends in an
absolute manic state. It finally seems to have clicked how

(01:13:16):
badly she screwed up. It was a full blown panic
attack and meltdown which ended with her in the.

Speaker 1 (01:13:22):
Er, which is good though.

Speaker 6 (01:13:24):
Yeah, she's getting help.

Speaker 1 (01:13:25):
I guess that's where she should probably be at at
this moment right now.

Speaker 6 (01:13:28):
Probably.

Speaker 1 (01:13:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (01:13:29):
Needless to say, she finally admits how miserable she is
and that she's messed up her life badly. Apparently she
tried calling me, but I had her blocked. She still
has her job and that info about her losing it
was wrong, but she's hanging by a thread there. Her
boss has basically ordered her to use her PTO for
a few weeks to get her head on straight. She's
a valuable asset there and they are trying to make

(01:13:51):
sure that she can fix herself before they pull the
plug on her. Her friend group is extremely close. My
ex was someone who was a very helpful in supportive friend,
so it makes sense that her group is going this
far and trying to help her. It is, however, an
unspoken agreement that if she goes back to how she
was again, they are all prepared to let her sink
on her own. She's doing as well as can be expected.

(01:14:14):
Her family has continued to pester her with calls and messages,
and they've tried showing up to her house, but have
been firmly redirected by friends and even neighbors. I hope
that she truly understands the kind of support system that
she has, as trashity crap show family disputes usually go.
Her parents and brothers have taken it too Facebook, which
from what I heard, has been in my excess favor

(01:14:36):
as it has exposed their behavior to many more people
and seems to have shut them up for a little.
The guess is never gonna shut up. It's us, you
guess it. Okay, toy time. Just go to Spotify, iHeartRadio,
Apple Podcasts, whatever your favorite podcast app is, because we've
got full episodes with more stories just like this one.

Speaker 1 (01:14:56):
Oh yeah, we're literally always over here. Just yeap, yeah happen.

Speaker 6 (01:15:01):
Gosh, yeah, there's a tiny bit more into the story.
But okay, we're having another rock bottom moment. Well, look,
and this is the thing that some people go through.

Speaker 1 (01:15:09):
It's it's good that she's got a support a front
group and they're doing this intervention. It seems like it's worked,
and I like that they did say it's like, hey,
we're doing this, but if this happens again, we're not
doing this. Yeah, it's gonna be sinkersh women, It's gonna
be just you.

Speaker 6 (01:15:22):
Yeah, because at the end of the day, like you know,
they still have to look out for themselves too, So
if it's like really draining for themselves just like it
was for Ope, then yeah, they don't have to stay there.

Speaker 1 (01:15:32):
I'm not gonna use my breath on this thing that
is not gonna happen.

Speaker 6 (01:15:35):
You know.

Speaker 1 (01:15:35):
It's like when you have a friend who's you know,
dating some and you're like, hey, stop after they're like
wha wha wha whare And then after X amount of
times you're like, just stop talking to me about it
and they're like what. And it's like because I tell
you what to do and you just never do it,
don't want to talk about it anymore.

Speaker 6 (01:15:50):
Yeah, stuff is so complicated, but there is a little
bit more into the story. Finally, she had one of
the mutuals pass a message to me. Essentially, it was
her admitting that all the horrible things she said to
me we're not true and we're done by her family
as I knew they were. She apologized for how things
ended and hoped that we could one day reconnect Sadly,
I had to relay that we need to stay separated

(01:16:11):
for good and that she just needs to focus on
her healing. But I told her I still care for
her and I wish her the best, but this needs
to be our goodbye. The message seems to have been
passed along and her friends are helping her process that
she's got a long way to go, but I hope
that she can find her peace as I am finding mine,
and that is the end of that story.

Speaker 1 (01:16:29):
Wow, it's a good place to leave it emotionally, I
think for him, I think so too. I hope he
learns the lesson of not falling into the like emotional
negativity trap of like coming at people like with foul intent.

Speaker 6 (01:16:39):
You don't need to respond like that.

Speaker 1 (01:16:41):
We're only human.

Speaker 6 (01:16:42):
We're only human.

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}I told my father to step up… or else my mother might leave him! - r/BestofRedditorUpdates | Reddit Stories