Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh John, Oh, Sam, I love you so much. I
love you almost as much as the great stories that
are about to come up.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
And you know what I love equally as much is
the two minutes of sponsors coming up, because they support
the show and make sure that we will have her happily.
Ever after my aunt got catfished on Instagram, they got
engaged in ninety days. Is this ninety day fiance?
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Your mom got ninety day fianced by a catfish?
Speaker 2 (00:27):
A little about my aunt. She's a former artist, extremely
overweight and disabled. He lives with her mom. I say
former because she used to be a pretty big on
the professional scene in our area selling her artwork, but
after her illness, she stopped making art until the last
year or so. By the way, this comes from Shi
Fasa and if you want to submit your own stories.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Go to Hours Last Showcase Storytime separate it.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Since she doesn't leave the house much, I thought I
would open up her world a little through social media
and give her a new platform to share her art.
I thought I did great fielding her questions, teaching her
to block people who made her uncomfortable, et cetera. At first,
she posted all about her art and it was super
cool to see her getting out there again. Now her
feet is mostly motivational quotes pasted over generic inspiring images
(01:08):
typical boomer on Facebook aesthetic down to very slimming filtered
selfies where she doesn't even look like herself. It's a
seven layer salad of cringe whatever. Right enter Andy, She
started showing us pictures of this smoking hot guy around
Thanksgiven twenty eighteen. We're talking nice Tan, totally ripped, perfect
teeth set in his head below the two sapphires he's
(01:30):
calling eyes. He's got a German shepherd and was supposedly
in the Marines. He looks like perfect social media bait,
like too dang good to be true, and he's into
my aunt. Andy also apparently lives in a city about
two hours away, so meeting him is plausible, but he
has to come to her since she can't drive. None
of us think he's real. He does weird stuff like
(01:51):
claim he doesn't know how to use Facebook or Instagram,
even though they met on Instagram. She started sending him
gift cards almost right away. On Christmas Eve, he was
supposed to pick her and my grandma up to take
them to our Christmas Eve dinner. We knew they had
a ride, didn't know who the ride was because usually
my uncle drives them. We get a call ten minutes
before my mom, girlfriend, and I are leaving for the
dinner saying that Andy hasn't shown up yet and they
(02:13):
need a ride. So we give them a ride and
wonder why the heck none of us knew Andy was
coming to dinner. Her Instagram posts about him are still cringeworthy.
She posted a picture of his dog and called it
her baby, their son, et cetera, and said of the dog,
Mama loves you baby.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Have you met this? Have you met the dog? Have
you met the dog?
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Now you have a parasocial relationship with the dog. She
randomly texted me once asking how to do a background check.
When I asked what was up, she just said someone
was being shady and didn't say anything more on the subject.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Cut to this morning.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
My girlfriend wakes me up to show me a post
she made that says she started a painting of her
boyfriend slash fiance record scratch freeze frame. What is this?
The same woman who wouldn't stop bad mouthing my uncle
for getting engaged to his girlfriend after a year, saying
the girlfriend only wanted him for money. We hadn't even
heard of this guy until Thanksgiving, and to my knowledge,
no one except my grandma, assuming he exists, has met him.
(03:03):
Now three months later, she's engaged. Now my dad, her brother,
has been pretty disengaged, saying anything he needs to know
about this guy, he'll learn in time.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
And I get it.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
She's missed most of the major milestones that society sees
is important. As far as I know, she's never had
a significantly long adult romance. My brother and I are
the closest thing to kids she has. She hasn't had
a driver's license for.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
My whole life.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
She lives with her mom. She's lonely, and the attention
probably feels great, but I'm worried still. I don't want
to see her taken advantage of I feel like I
should talk to her, but I don't know how without
making her feel like I'm out to get her.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Lease.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Annie advice would be great, and there is an update.
I texted her, since when is Andy your fiance? And
she replied, he asked me about two months ago.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
Funny, huh.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
I'm currently resisting the urge to drive to her and
explain catfishing this.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
Instant an update two.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Thank you for all your comments. I can't reply to
them all right now as my hands really hurt. But
here's the lowdown. Since this morning, I've acquired photos of
the guy and plan to reverse search them. Now that
I'm home. My girlfriend is helping me scroll through her
Instagram for clues. She found a post that suggests someone
has already expressed concerns, and I think that may have
been my dad. So if that's the case, I'll have
(04:11):
to tread carefully because she didn't take it well. But
I'm asking Dad for some more info. I hope to
get myself some cold art facts within the next couple
of days, and then gently open the conversation with her
when I can visit. I really don't want to push
her deeper into this fantasy she's constructed, so I hope
to engage her via googling, as was suggested here. I
don't know what the outcome will be, but please keep
(04:32):
me in your thoughts. I'm super worried it won't go well.
This has been eating me alive. I feel a great
deal of responsibility for the situation. I thought when I
got her started on social media, I covered all the
bases and cat fishing didn't even occur to.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Me at the time.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
One would hope that their loved ones could be held
to a little Internet savvy accountability, but sadly, I think
I hoped a little too high and my internet safety
lessons fell sorts. I also feel really hurt orlmost betrayed.
I'm still not over the fact that I discovered her
engagement via an Instagram post. Yeah, the fact that she
didn't even tell you, of all things, instead of her
sharing this with us. It definitely makes me wonder if
(05:07):
Andy is encouraging her not to give us details, or
maybe she knows in her gut this isn't right and
doesn't want to overshare, or maybe she's afraid we'll judge,
or I don't know. Hopefully I will get some clarity
when I talk with her. Thank you all again. I
definitely feel like it can form a better plan using
the advice you've both given me. Update so a couple
of people ask for an update. Hope I'm formatting it
right after making the original post, I couldn't get the
(05:28):
situation off my mind. It was driving me nuts and
really just stressing me out. I talked it over with
my mom and asked my aunt to send me some
pics of Andy. She just why, and I told her
that I wanted to compare them to the painting of him.
She started, so I acquired the pictures, then did a
reverse image search as many.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Of you suggested.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Thank goodness, she sent me more than one picture of
the guy because only the last one got a hit.
But from there it was smooth sailing. Turns out the
real guy is a popular Instagram model. He's got info
about being a marine and having a dog with the
same name as Andy's dog right in his bio.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
This dude was.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
So lazy he just lifted the real man's basic The
dog even has an Instagram and I found more if
ohoto's of Andy that he sent to her. And to
make my life even easier, the real Guy has a
series of videos up in his highlight section labeled scammers.
I watched them, and basically it was him addressing what
to do if someone is being catfished with his picks.
I was super nervous, but confident I had what I needed.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
A scammer farm.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
He's like, I am so hot. A lot of people
scam people.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
With my picks there's an entire business in another country
where they are using my pictures.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
He's like PSA, and don't fall for it.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
They want you to don't redeem the redeem the gift card.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
If I was being across that, I would like have
an affiliate link for the scammers.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
Okay, I get I get of this.
Speaker 4 (06:57):
I understand you're doing a lot of work for using
my likeness. Yeah, and I can maybe even help out,
Like I'll send you some videos. I'll send you some
stuff to help make it believable. But I'm gonna need
forty percent. Man Riley, he's a businessman. Riley, Grandma not
(07:17):
make money off of it.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
What am I supposed I do? His idea is too good.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
So from there I slept on it. Then asked my
aunt if I could come visit. My mom helped me
stay calm beforehand, and the worst part leading up to
it was standing in their house saying hello and just
waiting to drop them off. I started off by saying,
there's actually a reason I'm here. I have something to
tell you, and you won't like it. Explain my motives
for getting Andy's picks, the reverse image search and finding
the real guy. I pulled up his profile and the
(07:42):
dogs and let her scroll through it while answering questions
she and my grandma had. She tried to call Andy,
text him and just it was weird guys to use
the phrase I'll go psycho on his butt in several variants.
He never struck me as this type of person, but
she was just finally blowing him up. And of course,
when she finally got a hold of him and asked
to explain what she found augh his voice, she had
(08:03):
him on speakerphone.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Baby, what you saying?
Speaker 2 (08:06):
This was his answer to everything she said. Maybe we
don't need this, you just gotta truss. I wanted to
grab the phone and tell him to cut his crab.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
But didn't.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
I stayed a couple more hours answering questions and trying
to console her. Apparently been talking for like two years.
I'm torn on whether or not to believe that, because
as much as I love my aunt, I know from
experience she can bend the truth to fit delusion sometimes. Anyways,
my grandma, who was there the whole time, was being
her usual brusque self, so I pulled her aside and
(08:36):
tried to explain that this wasn't the time for tough love,
but for the band aid and kisses type of motherly support.
You agreed and thanked me, saying that she's been seeing
my aunt change, but she didn't say how. After we
went back into the main room, she was trying to
be a little bit more sensitive, but it doesn't come
naturally to her. From there, I needed to go work
and take care of some things before the work day ended.
Since then, unfortunately, it seems that despite my warnings that
(08:58):
she would not get anything that could be guaranteed as
the truth out of Andy, she insisted on demanding explanations,
and now he's got her convinced that everything they had
was real and that a friend had dared him into
the deception. So now, according to her, they're talking and
there's a lot of trust for Rebuilt. But you can
trust that we have full episodes for you guys to
listen to with stories just like this. If you go
to a Spotify, Apple podcast or your favorite podcast app
(09:21):
and search a Pocus story time, that's true, but there
is a little bit left to this story. I'm saddened
by the turn of events, but I did my job,
and she's an adult who has to make her own choice.
I'm trying to let go of the outcome, which obviously
wasn't the one I hoped for and did not feel hurt.
I know she's going through a lot emotionally, and that
it was silly to hope my intervention would change things.
Hopefully she'll see the truth of it sooner rather than later,
(09:42):
and I can have played a part in that, and
that is the end of that story.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
Poor, this is sad. This is sad. I really hope
that she is.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
If she knows she's been catfished. At this point, what
are you like?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
What can you do?
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yeah, she's still willing to work it out with this guy.
Speaker 3 (09:58):
I'm making fa I make it man. No, you got
catfished and you're startled work it out.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
And you're still working that out. I refuse to move
back with my parents. I'm tired of their control.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Oh so I'm tired. I'm tired. Are you telling me
what to do all the time?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
I twenty five female am of South Asian descent, brought
up Muslim, identify as such for the most part, and
come from a family where every minute detail of my
life has been decided for me up until two years ago.
By the way, this comes from Chumrie and if you
want to submit your own stories, go to our slas
Shokey storytime suppering. I suffer from diagnosed bipolar disorder, depression,
and severe anxiety. Psychiatrists and therapist say it's because of
(10:36):
my father and mother, and I am prescribed slurry of
medication to deal with the issues. Anyway, I was always
super obedient, polite, extremely studious, creative and a good girl
all around. Until I got to college, of course, and
I discovered six boys, et cetera. I went through some
rough patches. So when I was twenty one, my parents
had had enough with me. They took me back to
(10:57):
the home country and forcibly had me married to an
a butt wipe who was a bit and someone I
had no interest in romantically or otherwise. One and a
half years later, I was broken down and going through
divorce at the age of twenty two, and by twenty
three I was a divorcee. Around the same time, I
met a wonderful human twenty six male who I am
still with on Tinder, and he makes me happy. He
is not the same race or of the same religion,
(11:19):
of course, because I just didn't want to associate. There
were tears, fights, physical et cetera. When they my family
caught wind of my whirlwind romance, so they forced me
to break out with him, my boyfriend. We parted ways
until I realized he still cared because he text me
about daily asking how I was, and despite everything, he
still wanted to be with me. So, with all the
(11:40):
abuse at home and a yearning for wanting to feel
loved and accepted, I saved up my money and moved out.
Fast forward to today. As of today, it has been
two years since I moved out, and now my parents
want me to move back. I live close enough where
I see them at least one to two times a month,
and I talked to them often. But I just don't
want to move back because I know it'll go back
to the way it was. My boyfriend recently moved about
(12:02):
two and a half hours away, and if I moved home,
I'd never see him again. But I love him and
want to be with them, So my parents keep throwing
this ultimatum in my face. If you don't move back,
don't ever come back here. You're not welcome here. We're
not your Airbnb hosts, we're not your Uber service to
pick you up and drop you off as you please.
You are not family, your poison. I'd post a photo
(12:22):
of a textual conversation, however this was burbal. I feel
genuinely unloved by them and pushed into a corner. But
I love them unconditionally, even after everything they've done.
Speaker 3 (12:31):
No go to therapy for that. Undo that, undo that,
there's a therapy that can fix that.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
But I also love my boyfriend. This upcoming weekend is
Labor Day, for which I was planning to visit my boyfriend. Instead,
my parents sprung a family vacation on me. They told
me they bought my ticket and that I need to
take or off from work. But I can't, and I
don't want to because I know they'll just tell me
about moving.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Back, which is that's insane, because that's something you do
for a child who's in elementary Exactly. You don't do
that too, twenty one year old adull do as a
job and a career and say you need to take
a week off.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
I've bought your ticket. If you don't come, you're bad.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
At this point, I'm so done with everything. I just
wish that I had a genuine solution. I feel like
an ostrich with this head in the sand, hiding but
completely exposed. What do I do? How do I deal
with this? It's taking a toll on me and there
is an update, but before we get into it. I
think it's it's natural to love your parents and for
them to be a very important part of your life
(13:25):
and your heart, even though they've hurt you. But I
do think that therapy could probably help with this. I
do think that you have to know that it won't
help either of you or your relationship with them to
let them continue to do this. I think that there
is a level of like low contact that could you
could go and kind of put your foot down, because
your relationship is not going to improve and they're not
(13:46):
going to love you more if you allow this behavior.
I twenty five female, am currently so torn up and wrecked.
This situation has escalated the point where I actually don't
know what to do. So on Friday I posted about
my qualms with moving back and how my family is,
et cetera. I had to go to a wedding this
past weekend and I wasn't going to go with my
family but with my uncle. I filled my uncle in
(14:07):
on the situation and he asked me what my plan was.
I told him I was not going to move back
because it was too much for me and that I
needed to keep my distance. Said okay, and we went
to the wedding. It was enjoyable because we meet my uncle,
his family, and my parents and brothers were in a
public setting surrounded by friends. Anyway, I was acting like
nothing was wrong because I didn't want to signal to
my family friends that my parents and I were having problems,
(14:30):
so I continue talking to my friends. A couple of
hours into the event, my dad comes up to me
and says, you are a crap daughter. Your uncle just
told me you're not moving back. We we don't want
to be seen with you.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
All right, listen to them. This is when you just
listen to these people. It doesn't make what they're saying okay,
just because they're your parents.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
I couldn't control my emotions because I was upset. I
was crying and just wanted to leave. I ran to
the bathroom and he followed, so did my mom and brother.
My mom started yelling at my dad. Wedding was not
the time or place to discuss this, and my brother
twenty three mail was telling my dad that he was
wrong in this situation and that he should have waited.
In my opinion, it was wrong of my uncle to
disclose that information at the time, absolutely, and he should
(15:12):
have waited for me to speak with them. My dad
walked out of the wedding and left with my uncle.
My mom sat there and cried in the bathroom, as
did I. My brother just walked out and sat on
the benches. So many people came up and asked if
everything was okay, leaving it to my family to ruin
someone else's event. My mom passed it off as our
cat right away. Anyway, we my mom, my brother, and
(15:32):
I drove home to my parents' house together. My dad
comes downstairs and starts to yell at me profusely and
calls my uncle to use him as an alibi for
what was said. As it turns out, my uncle didn't
tell him anything, only that my dad should leave me
alone and I'll talk to him myself. He just made
that statement to get a rise out of me at
a public event. Dang, he tricked you. He did the
he did the oh so you're leaving, and people's like,
(15:54):
who told you? And he was like, you just did.
I started to get hysterical. I yelled, I cursed him out,
and I told him he was the reason I wasn't
living at home. He instead got up and pointed the
finger at my mom, told her she was the reason
why his kids disrespect him.
Speaker 3 (16:07):
What an idiot, stupid literally straight up go it's your fault,
and then he goes, it's your fault, wife.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
And that she was a terrible wife and a dishonorable woman.
He basically slandered her on the group chat with her
side of the family. She, on the other hand, has
never spoken out to anyone about what happens between them.
So yeah, while I was screaming, I fell over because
I couldn't breathe and my chest was in pain. My
brother picked me up and carried me to my room
and gave me water and told me to calm down.
(16:34):
It was an anxiety attack, a severe one. I cried
myself to sleep. In the morning, I went to my
mom's room only to find her crying because my dad
packed all of his stuff in the middle of the
night and left, apparently to Pakistan for good.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
WHOA.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
I couldn't handle the situation, so I went back to
my apartment. Later on, my brother calls me crying, saying
Dad sign the mortgage over to my mom and that
he put all the credit card information in her name
and all the bills and utilities know how to pay
the bills because they can't afford the massive house without
my dad's paycheck or pay the bills or the car
payments or anything, and that it's all my fault and
(17:07):
if I moved home for good, it would all be fixed.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
Oh right, it's all her fault and not the guy
who's responsible for doing it, which is the dead.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Okay, so now the rest of the family's be having it.
It's the dead's fault for doing this.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
But at what cost. I am so broken. I haven't
told my boyfriend any of this, and I'm pretending that
everything is fine because I don't know if he can
handle it well. I think that you should give him
that opportunity. I don't think you should, like, you know,
just assume that he can't. I think you're in a relationship,
and it seems like even when you broke up with him,
he got you know, he still waited, though. I feel
like you can give him a little bit of that load.
(17:40):
My brother, my brother doesn't know. I have two new
roommates moving in and we signed the lease already. If
I left, I would still have to pay the rent
because we aren't allowed to sublet, and they were only
allowed to move out because it's with me, and you
know what else is with us? Full episodes with stories
just like this, hopefully a little bit happier, but you
can find them on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you
(18:03):
get your podcasts. Just go to Okay story Time. So
now I'm feeling severely stressed, feeling physically ill, hiding this
mess from my boyfriend who I am seeing at his
parents place this weekend, admitting information from my brother and mother,
Feeling like my dad is using this as a ruse
to get me home to exact control over my life.
I feel financially obligated to support if this is real,
but don't have the funds readily available to support two
(18:25):
whole humans other than myself outside of paying my own
rent and bills. And there are some comments to finish
up this story. Oh, on one, you can't just sign
a mortgage and bills over to someone, and you death
can't just remove your name from a mortgage. Your dad
is full of crap and trying to scare you all
into compliance.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
Boom, thank you someone who actually knew that, because I
didn't know that and reply.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
Also, as for your boyfriend, this is obviously not his
fault either, but it is some heavy crap. Talk to
him when you feel ready and able. This will test
the strength of your relationship, but at the end of
the day you will learn what kind of partnership and
support system you have in each other, which is valuable
information in any serious relationship. Exactly, you sound like a strong,
caring and compassionate young woman.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
And we'll make it through. And there we have it. Yeah,
don't let your dad. I feel like it is a trap.
It's a trick. It's a trap trying to control you.
Don't let him trap you. Don't let him drop you.
Speaker 2 (19:13):
But that is the end of that story, so we're
going to get into the next one. My best friend
demanded I leave my own birthday party to drive him home.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
Is that really your best friend?
Speaker 2 (19:27):
February ninth, twenty twenty five. Hello everyone, this is my
first post, so please bear with me. I twenty six female.
I've been best friends with Jake twenty seven mail for
over six years.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
Real suspicious j reals us we work at the same
company and are also planning to go on a work
and travel trip soon.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
By the way, this comes from Lost in Thoughts zero
seven and if you want to submit your own stories,
go to our slashokey story tenn severed it. So this
situation happened last Friday, which was my birthday and a
big family gathering with over twenty guests, some of whom
traveled over an hour to be there. Jake was invited
and he told me he would come the night before.
(20:09):
We went grocery shopping together, but while sitting in the car,
he suddenly told me last minute that he wouldn't be
attending because he picked up an extra shift at work.
I was a little hurt because we always celebrate our
birthdays together and he didn't need to take the shift.
Our company has plenty of people who could have covered it,
but I accepted it and moved on. On my birthday,
we were texting before a shift for context. Jake doesn't
(20:31):
have a driver's license and usually relies on public transport
or walks. I do have a license, but I don't
own a car. I use my mother's when I need it.
That afternoon, he mentioned that he would have to walk
home because public transport stops running at a certain time,
something he already knew when he took the shift. He
also told me he was feeling a bit sick and
asked if I could pick him up and drive him home.
(20:53):
Our boss even told him he could leave two hours
early to catch the last bus if he needed to,
but he chose not to. I told him I couldn't
leave my own birthday party just to pick him up
and drive him home. I had guests over food and
drinks to serve, and I felt it would be rude
to leave people when they had put in time and
effort to celebrate with me. He replied, can't you just
(21:15):
leave for five minutes and drive me home?
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Okay, that's actually insane.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
I explained that it wasn't just a five minute trip.
I would be gone for at least thirty minutes in total.
He replied with a dismissive okay. Later, I checked find
mine to make sure he got home safely, and texted
him apologizing that I couldn't drive him, reminding him that
I normally do, but I really couldn't leave my own party.
That's when he got angry and told me my behavior
(21:42):
was unacceptable and that I was just making excuses. For
further context, I do drive him home fairly often, even
when I'm not working the same shift as him, but
this time I had a prior commitment when that he
was originally supposed to attend. I reminded him again that
our boss had told him he could leave early to
catch the bus. At this point, he started arguing that
(22:03):
the town is dangerous at night, but we've both lived
here our entire lives, and nothing has ever happened to us.
I used to walk at night all the time before
I had a license, and another friend of ours, who
was also a coworker, regularly walks home late at night
without issue. I tried to understand if something else was
going on and asked him if maybe he was upset
about something deeper and just projecting it onto this situation.
(22:27):
I might have worded it poorly, but instead of talking,
he just exploded at me.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
So that's a yes, sense, Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
Something else is going on here. I apologized if I
said it in the wrong way, but at that point
he wasn't listening to me at all. I don't think
there was any right way to say it, honestly, I
think he's just gonna get mad at you whatever you do.
Speaker 3 (22:49):
It's already absurd to be like, leave your birthday party
to give me a ride home.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
Meanwhile, he wasn't trying to understand my side either. I
told him it was my responsibility to be at my
own birthday party and that my guest had made an
effort to celebrate with me. I couldn't just disappear for
half an hour. He dismissed that and told me I
was a bad friend a bad sister because I said
I wouldn't try my sister home either if I had
prior commitments and it wasn't an emergency, and that my
(23:16):
priorities were all wrong. In the end, he told me
he didn't want to see me for a while. I
am honestly confused and questioning our friendship after this because
of how he reacted. I really tried to understand aside,
and I get that he was hurt that I wasn't
there for him when he needed me. But at the
same time, I couldn't just leave my own party if
it wasn't an emergency. Now I don't know if our
(23:37):
friendship can bounce back from this, or how I'm supposed
to rely on him moving forward. If this is how
he reacts to something like this, what happens if we
end up in a similar situation, well traveling definitely don't travel.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
With his man?
Speaker 2 (23:49):
Is he just going to leave me behind if I
don't do what he wants? For context, him feeling sick
was related to a sore throat, so nothing that would
be classified as an emergency. So am I the a
hole for refusing to leave my own birthday party to
drive him home? And there is an update?
Speaker 1 (24:07):
But what do you think?
Speaker 3 (24:09):
Clearly you're the one in the wrong for not leaving
your birthday party.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Yeah, to try your priorities are wrong.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Yeah, your priorities are totally out of line.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
So this is such a selfish individual. Yeah, he was
had a sore throat, you monster on. He could have
left early, but he didn't because he's a hustler.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
He's a grinder. Grinder. No, you're not the a hole?
Speaker 2 (24:33):
No, And I think that he was. I feel like
my vibe of this right now is that Jake is
trying to test the bounds of their friendship and in
a way like try and see if OP will drop
everything for him, And when Op won't. He's like, well,
there you haven't. You're not a good enough friend. February tenth,
(24:53):
twenty twenty five, about five hours later. I know this
is an early update because my post is just a
few hours ag, but I thought I will compress more
information and some things that happened in the last few
hours into an update. First of all, thank you all,
I'm so sorry, blah blah blah. To clarify some things
I've speculated on since in the comments, there are no
(25:15):
romantic feelings involved. He's he's a mendlever, so there was
never any romantic interest between us. After reading a lot
of comments and reflecting on everything, I've decided to go
no contact aside from necessary work related interactions. I've also
made the decision to go forward with my work and
travel plans alone because I simply can't trust someone like
(25:36):
this to be my emergency contact in another country. I
had a long conversation with my parents and show them
the chat. My mom actually broke down crying. She told
me she's seen narcissistic behavior and red flags in him
for years, but things have gotten worse in the last
few months.
Speaker 1 (25:53):
She said.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
This has been weighing on her, and when she laid
everything out for me, I finally saw the bigger picture.
Even though it wasn't a romantic relationship, I now realize
he was isolating me from other friends and family, always
trying to make himself the center of my social life.
He even tried to insert himself into most of my
other friendships, and looking back, anytime I made progress in life,
(26:14):
you would find a way to hold me back or
drag me down. My dad told me that some of
the recent arguments I had with my family were actually
their way of trying to get me to see what
was happening, but I just didn't realize it until now.
He also said he's relieved I won't be traveling overseas
with him. Yeah. My parents reassured me that while this
will be hard at first, I'll heal and cutting ties
(26:37):
now will make things easier in the long run. They
also pointed out things I had overlooked, like how he
tagged along on family holidays without paying, but was never
particularly grateful to my family for inviting him. I've started
talking to one of our mutual friends about what happened.
She's currently busy with the super Bowl, but once she's
back I'll tell her everything as objectively as possible. I
(26:58):
don't want to trash talk him or damage his reputation,
but if coworkers ask, I'll be honest about why I've
distanced myself. I genuinely do wish him the best, and
I hope he works through his issues and finds happiness.
But I'm done. My mom breaking down in tears was
the final straw for me. Even though a lot of
my social circles overlap with him, I know I'll eventually
(27:20):
sort everything out and move on. It honestly feels like
a friendship divorce, but I think this is a necessary step.
I need to reevaluate who my real friends are and
how they treat me, and I might need to cut
ties with a few other people along the way. But
you should never cut ties with us because you can
listen to full episodes with stories just like this. Just
(27:40):
go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast stapp
in search a bookay, start time, and there you go.
But there is a little bit left do this story.
But do you have any final thoughts?
Speaker 1 (27:51):
There hadn't have been like plenty of warning signs.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
Well, it seems like the family saw them.
Speaker 3 (27:56):
Yeah, so sometimes you know, it's best to listen to
some people on the ASP when they are seeing warning signs.
Don't listen to them blindly.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Yeah, take a look, be observant, but don't just be like, oh,
they hate me, I'm not gonna listen to them. I
actually texted one of my close friends joking that we're
getting a divorce and that I'm filing for custody of her.
I really hope she won't be manipulated by him, but
right now I need to be prepared for anything. This
won't be easy, but I'll cut my losses and move forward,
(28:29):
hopefully towards a better future with better friends, ones I
can truly trust and who put just as much effort
into our friendship as I do.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
And that is the end of that story. Good way
to end it.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
I think that get better friends mentality to have take
custody of that one friend.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Yes, and you can egle custodies. I think that like.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
When you when you stop being friends with someone who
lay another close friends is still friends with, it's tough
to balance.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Because you don't want to.
Speaker 2 (28:59):
Like I always tried to not crap talk them to
that friend because I don't want to. I don't want
to sway their opinion, but you just you just you
don't really say anything good either. You just kind of
wait until they realize it on your own, and then
they start saying. You know, they're like, actually, you know
that was not cool today, and you're like, yeah, that
wasn't cool. They're like, uh uh this weekend they like
(29:23):
really let me down. I'm like, they did let you
down and then slowly been there, done, met with that
guy and then once so like, wow, I really don't
like them. You're like, yes, I've hated them the whole time.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
It's very sa I've seen the light. Sam.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
Here.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
We're gonna get back to the stories, but here's three
of its bad from our sponsors.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
I refused to pay extra for my friend's bachelorette trip.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
The bridal party got upset.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Well tell them to ef off.
Speaker 3 (29:54):
My friend Shay, twenty seven year old female, is getting
married in November. I, twenty three year old femal, met
her at work about two and a half years ago
and we've gotten pretty close recently.
Speaker 1 (30:04):
By the way, this comes.
Speaker 3 (30:05):
From user Lady tiger O two and if you want
to submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay,
storytime subrette and submit them there. So once she got engaged,
she picked about six bridesmaids. She didn't pick me to
be a bridesmaid, which was totally cool. We were close, but.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
Not brides maid close.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
Shay and I still hung out a lot, so she
invited me and a few more of our coworkers, Alana
and Sandy, who were also not bride'smaids to the bachelorette trip. Shae, Alana, Sandy,
and I were all pretty close and we were excited
about the trip. Shay eventually started a group chat with
the bridesmaids, my coworkers, and I to start planning the trip.
(30:44):
It should be noted that Shay had both a matron
of honor and a maid of honor. The group chat
informed that we'd be going on a carnival cruise in
the summer. My friend Shay has been in deep debt
since I've known her and finances just about every She
asks if anyone would like to share a drink package,
basically meaning only a few of us would actually have
(31:05):
the drink package and we just sneak our.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Drinks to the girls who don't have one.
Speaker 3 (31:09):
The idea was that we'd all pay equal amounts and
just split up the drinks. I personally have been on
a few cruises and I enjoy having my own drink pack.
Carnival specifically frowns upon sharing a drink pack and will
cut you off and make your drink pack non refundable.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Call me a rule.
Speaker 3 (31:25):
Follower, but I just did not want the extra stress
of doing that. I figured Ilana, Sandy, and I would
just share a room as the non bridesmaids and all
buy the drink package. The three of us had communicated
this ahead of time amongst ourselves. Naturally, the maid and
Matron of Honor make a group chat with everyone but
Shay to discuss the more intimate details. The Matron of
(31:45):
honor suggests that everyone sends one hundred dollars towards Shay's
portion of the trip, so that it could be entirely
paid for. The Maid of Honor agrees, and maybe one
or two of the bridesmaids that aren't going on the
trip say they'll contribute in other ways or send a
bit of money. Otherwise, the chat was pretty silent. Why
don't we all try that? Send send them to.
Speaker 1 (32:04):
Your group chat.
Speaker 3 (32:05):
Everybody, send me one hundred dollars right now for and
then I'll make us all a party. Yeah, see how fast.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
No one responds.
Speaker 3 (32:14):
I call my girls Alana and Sandy and ask their
thoughts on the extra money. The three of us all
admit that it feels a bit awkward contributing the extra money.
Alana and Sandy are both in a financial tight spot,
and it was a big deal they were able to
go to begin with. I I'm in a more financially
secure position, but still felt out of place contributing while
not being in the bridal party.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3 (32:36):
After about a day of the chat being silent, the
Maid of Honor reached out to be direct. I get
a text from her that says she thought she'd ask
me separately about the one hundred dollars contribution. With the
group chat being so quiet, I talk it over with
my coworkers, who never got a message from the Maid
of Honor, and after getting permission from Sandy and Alana,
I respond telling her that thee hundred dollars contribution is
(32:58):
a lovely idea for the idal party, but I felt
out of place and that us coworkers weren't really in
a position to offer the extra money. The Maid of
Honor sends me an incredibly passive, aggressive text back.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Goodness.
Speaker 3 (33:11):
She tells me that because I signed up to go
on Shay's bachelorette party, that it's part of my responsibility
to make sure it's a special moment for her, and
that I need to contribute in any way that I can.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
Is my presence not your present? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Hello, it's frustrating that, like after the fact, after everyone
was already kind of on board to go, they've made
this new contribution kind of mandatory.
Speaker 1 (33:40):
You know, you're kind of getting strong armed.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
Yeah, Like you can't be like, oh if anyone wants
to contribute and then get mad at people when they
don't want to.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
She ends this message saying, I'm not trying to pressure anyone,
but I expect anyone who signed up to go pitch
in some shape or form to help cover Shay and
make it a memorable occasion for her. Shortly after her
private interaction with me, the Maid of Honor sends to
the group chat another message, saying, I absolutely do not
(34:11):
expect everyone to pay towards Shay's trip right now, or
to pay the one hundred dollars mentioned above. I do
expect anyone coming to pitch something towards her trip in
some way prior to leaving.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
This can be ten dollars or fifty bucks.
Speaker 3 (34:24):
Or random five dollar bill to match your Starbucks order
when you have it, Please keep in mind it doesn't
have to be but we want to celebrate Shay as
much as possible, and that includes covering her expenses as
much as we can.
Speaker 2 (34:36):
Okay, this is how she could have asked if she
wanted that, If she wanted people to actually give money,
she could have said first and before she sent any
of those messages. She just sends to the group chat. Hey,
I thought it would be a nice idea if we
helped out with Shay's cots. If you want to donate anything,
If you want to chip in, let me know, no
(34:56):
worries if.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
Not, Yeah, it'd be nice. Make it special, not like if.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
You don't own it, you're the worst. And then like
throwing out like, oh and you're gonna get a five
dollars Starbuck thorder that you might as well help Shae.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
Yeah, it's just weird.
Speaker 3 (35:13):
Shortly after that message, Alana speaks up about how she
doesn't feel comfortable giving the one hundred dollars towards Shay's portion,
and the group chat shifts again. Both the Maid of
Honor and the Matroen of Honor sends super long texts
with phrases like usually the bride's expenses covered on these trips.
From the experiences I've had, I knew that when accepting
(35:33):
the invitation to go, regardless, the rest of us will
be stepping up to cover whatever we can. It isn't
easy on any of us either. I'm not going to
keep beating the topic of money. Only the expectations I
have on those who want to join the trip to
celebrate a bride, not a vacation.
Speaker 1 (35:50):
Dude, I would like not go on this trip.
Speaker 3 (35:52):
We all decided that this trip was something we chose
to do to celebrate Shae. With that being said, this
is not a selfish vacation. If you can afford a
drink package, you can certainly afford to aid in the
expenses of Shay's way. I have not planned on asking
anyone for money for goodie.
Speaker 1 (36:09):
Bags or swag bags.
Speaker 3 (36:11):
But a Shay cannot be celebrated appropriately, then I don't
feel that it's appropriate that the Maid of Honor and
I eat that entire expenditure, and I will be expecting
everyone to join in paying for that or opting out
of receiving that.
Speaker 1 (36:24):
That being the.
Speaker 3 (36:25):
Swag decors or favors for the duration of the trip.
Should it amount to over one hundred or more, so,
the reason we budgeted for this amount towards Shay was
so we could afford the other favors. I do believe
that as a friend, this is not a large ask.
It is mind blowing to me that this conversation is
even a topic. The audacity of enjoying the celebration of
a true friend but prioritizing booze over a friend is
(36:48):
quite baffling. The drink packages don't have to be paid
until the time of trip, so therefore there's plenty of
time to prepare for that payment. I am extremely saddened
as a friend, a mother, a sister, and wife, meaning
I have been the b that I have to even
address this with other women going on the trip anymore.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
I literally would not go on the trip, and I
would tell the bride like, hey, you know, I'm not
feeling super comfortable anymore. Not anything you did. Yeah I
love you so much, not anything you did. It was
your bridesmaids. Your bridesmaids.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
It was your maid of honor, and of honor.
Speaker 3 (37:20):
Yeah, trying to uh hustle everybody for a hundred bucks
to pay for you.
Speaker 2 (37:26):
And then's being like, Oh, you don't have to, but
we're gonna make you feel bad.
Speaker 3 (37:29):
Yeah, you don't have to, but we're gonna literally make
you feel like scum.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
The tone of the entire group chat has shifted.
Speaker 3 (37:36):
It's pretty much a stalemate from the awkward conversations at
this point, there has been a few girls in the
chat who have been entirely silent, yet all of the
message seemed directed towards my co workers and I for
speaking up. And by the way, you can speak up
on the fact that there are full episodes with stories
(37:56):
like this at your fingertips. Just go to Spotify or
iHeartRadio or Apple podcast wherever you get your podcasts, search ok,
story time, and that's it's as simple as that. Then
you get the whole the whole kit. You got the
kit and the kaboodle, the whole world. Put them together,
you get the whole world in your hands. So we
have a little more here. I mean, let's just finish
(38:18):
it off, shall we. At this point, everything is so tense.
I'm debating not even going.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
That's our idea, that's what I would do, That's what
I said we're gonna do if we were you, even if.
Speaker 3 (38:29):
I pay the extra money. At this point, it's noticeably
awkward and uncomfortable. I know someone has shared something with
Shay because she keeps apologizing to me personally for the
tension in the chat, though she claims she's unsure what's happening.
So am I the a hole for not paying for
the bride?
Speaker 1 (38:46):
No? No, no, no.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Those maid of honor of the a holes they need
to stay in their lane.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
Yeah, these people are literally ruining her bachelor ad trip
by making everybody not.
Speaker 1 (38:58):
Want to go.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
Literally, if I was the bride and I found out
that like a bunch of people decided not to come
to my Bachelor atte trip because my maid or matron
of honor whatever, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:10):
We'll leave them about money, I'd be like.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Dudes, what's your deal? Yeahill chill out, my guy.
Speaker 3 (39:17):
There's some people just don't have any chill. We have
some comments comment number one. I think you will do
yourself a big favor if you bow out of this trip.
There will be drama and lots of it. If you
go reply this one million percent, get to the other,
get the other two friends, and go on your own
trip and have a fabulous time without stress. There's another comment,
(39:37):
I would pass on the trip simply because it's too
awkward now, which is what we've been saying. I also
think this is too much money for someone else's celebration.
I don't necessarily think that's true, but it's still it's
just a It's more the principle. I am willing to
cover a fancy dinner for the bride, but not the
entire cruise. Reply covering the entire trip is asking way
too much. When people talk about wedding culture getting out
(39:57):
of control, they mean behavior like this. If money is tight,
then maybe they should have a more reasonable celebration. That's
what I'm saying exactly. Reply exactly, because on top of this,
a wedding gift will be expected. Along with the cost
of the dress and the shoes, it can get crazy expensive.
I think the Nid of Honor should have planned an
evening's entertainment, not a cruise. No, I don't think you're
(40:20):
the a hole. I think Shae invited extra girls, so
there would be extra people that chip in some money
for Shay. I don't think I would go on the
trip if you haven't booked your tickets yet. I would
say something like, when I looked at my finances to
do my tax as, I realized I really shouldn't do
this right now and bow out reply.
Speaker 1 (40:37):
I couldn't agree more. You're being used as an.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
Automated tailer machine, and that's why that passive aggressive crap happened.
She doesn't want to pay for it, and she's pierced
that she will have to, hence the guilt trip on
you and your friends, and that, my friends, is the
end of that story.
Speaker 1 (40:55):
There you go.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
I'm seeing some people on the shots saying that in
previous weddings that they've been in, they've paid for the
bachelorette party. But I think that's a good point because
it's the bachelorette party versus a trip like those are
huge different like cost.
Speaker 1 (41:13):
Party versus cruise. Yeah, and then all that it entails, so.
Speaker 2 (41:19):
That at least is my opinion, I think it's little
silly to expect people to pay for an entire trip
for someone.
Speaker 3 (41:25):
Yeah, it's like I don't know, like imagine like planning
a destination trip wedding to like Biji yeah, and then
being like, by the way, have to pay for it.
I can't afford any of this, So you guys are
all gonna have to pitch in, and if you don't,
then you all hate me and aren't my real friends.
Speaker 1 (41:41):
And the wedding's canceled. Thanks, he ruined it. Thanks. I
hope you're all. I hope you're all happy ruining my
life forever. Hey, y'all, it's John og Host here.
Speaker 3 (41:52):
We're gonna get back to the stories, but here's a
quick three minute break from ask for more sponsors.
Speaker 2 (41:56):
My best friend became distant when I got pregnant because
of her past.
Speaker 1 (42:01):
Ominous ooh, the intrigue, the mystery, the mystique. Where are
we going? What's happening?
Speaker 2 (42:08):
I'm a big battle of emotions and hormones right now,
So I'm saying sorry in advance for what is probably
going to be a very errantic writing style. Needless to say,
I'm no George R. R. Martin, and thank God for that,
because we'd have to wait nine years for the next post.
Speaker 1 (42:23):
If you were so.
Speaker 2 (42:24):
My husband and I have been married for nine years
and have been trying to have a baby for the
past five Honestly, it's been a long and grueling process,
full of tears, heartbreak, and disappointment. By the way, this
comes from deleted and if you want to smit your
own stories, got our slash okay, story time separate it. So,
thanks to the miracle of modern science, I am happy
to announce I am now twelve weeks along with our
(42:46):
first child. All gratulations. We are overjoyed and pleased as
punch and plan on telling everyone next week once we
are all well into the second trimester. There's only one
minor shadow being cast over the happiest moment of our lives,
and unfortunately, that's my best friend, who I will refer.
Speaker 1 (43:05):
To as Rachel.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
Rachel and I have a friendship straight out of a
Taylor Swift song. We met in ninth grade Spanish class
and have been bosom buddies ever since. What is this
Anne of Green Gabrels. We even went to the same
university and roomed together, although we have very different majors.
After college, she moved to another city about an hour
away for work, and I married my college sweetheart a
(43:28):
few years later.
Speaker 1 (43:29):
It's been difficult to keep in.
Speaker 2 (43:31):
Touch with life being what with life being what it
is and her not exactly living close by, but we've
managed and are still the best of friends. About five
years ago, Rachel got into a relationship with and quickly
moved in with a guy whom she was is convinced
is the one. I don't exactly like the guy. He's
(43:52):
not a bomb or an axe on aliber, but I
just don't think he's a good fit for her. Rachel
is desperate to get married and have children, and her
boyfriend has been telling her for years now he has
zero chi interest in having children and absolutely will not
ever get married.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
If you're with the guy who's like, nope on all
of those you got to start over.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
That's not a guy for those things.
Speaker 2 (44:15):
I've told Rachel she can't change the guy and she
needs to end it and move on, but of course
she won't. She loves her boyfriend and is convinced one
day he'll come around and change his mind, et cetera.
Needless to say, after a year or two of year
or two of dating this guy, Rachel started becoming a
real debbie downer towards any of our friends or family
who got engaged or started having children. Long story short,
(44:38):
she's now at the point where she tosses wedding invites
into the trash ooh, although she always sends a nice
gift and will call me crying and half wasted about
how much it kills her, it's unfair, etc. Girl, you
need to break up with your boyfriend if this is
how you're feeling, That's.
Speaker 1 (44:54):
What I want to know more than anything.
Speaker 2 (44:55):
Yeah, but the worst is that lately she has started
to cut peace a lot of her life who have kids.
She doesn't see her family members who have children, and
she avoids her friends who do Altogether. I understand it's
hard watching everyone around her move on into the next
stage of our lives while she stays in limbo, but
it's honestly starting to affect me and how I can
(45:16):
talk to her. The city Rachel lives in just happens
to be the living place of several of my family members,
and my husband and I made plans months in advance
to visit them over the holidays and we plan on
springing our bonus news on them. Then I also made
plans with Rachel. This all happened before I got pregnant,
to make a day for her where we would spend
(45:37):
it together, just the two of us. I'm now kind
of dreading this trip. Rachel doesn't know what I'm expecting,
and I now have no idea how to tell her,
and worse, I'm scared to death she will end our
friendship over it, or at the very least be devastated
and crushed. I'm ecstatic over my pregnancy, but I also
care deeply for my friend and her feelings. Clearly, I
(45:58):
can't lie or hide it forever. I think the news
should come for me, but I don't know what to do,
or what to say or how to say it. Should
I call her before the trip or send her an
email so I can give her time to process or
possibly bail. Or should I just tell her while we
spend our day together in the city, or maybe even
wait until after the trip to say something. And since
(46:19):
I know I do have to say something one way
or the other, what should I say? I don't want
to hurt her feelings, but this is the best news
of my life, and it's going to be hard pretending
I'm not thrilled or that I don't really care.
Speaker 1 (46:32):
Thoughts and there.
Speaker 2 (46:33):
Is an update?
Speaker 1 (46:35):
Honestly, I think you need.
Speaker 2 (46:37):
It's really nice that you are caring about her feelings,
but at a certain point, it's just exhausting to try
and cover up your happiness for someone who is kind
of keeping themselves in this unhappy state.
Speaker 1 (46:57):
Yes, what would my advice be to you?
Speaker 3 (47:00):
Don't pretend like you're not excited, don't pretend like you
don't care. Be exactly how you feel. And then if
your friend is like, why would you do that to me,
she's not your friend?
Speaker 1 (47:13):
Cut her off.
Speaker 3 (47:14):
If someone can't be happy for you in the happiest
moment of you're a life, then they're not and they're
not there for you.
Speaker 2 (47:21):
In case anyone is interested, I wanted to give a
quick update to let everyone know what happened. I decided
to send Rachel an email before my husband and I
left to give her heads up and give her time
to process and the option to bail if she wanted to.
Speaker 1 (47:34):
Here's what I said, Hey girl, how are you?
Speaker 2 (47:38):
I'm so excited about her upcoming day together. I wanted
to hit you up because I've actually got some exciting
news I want to share with you first. You know how,
mister baby Blues and I have been trying forever to
have a baby. Well, I can now safely say that
we can expect to have a little miss or mister
somewhere around May.
Speaker 1 (47:55):
Thirtieth if we get drinks.
Speaker 2 (47:57):
I just wanted to give you a heads up so
you wouldn't wonder if my refusal to drink was because
I joined a cult. Ah excited, I hit the sales
of Black Friday with you. Let me know if that
still works for you. I got no response from.
Speaker 3 (48:09):
Her that of course you didn't, because it's not a
text message thing to send to somebody.
Speaker 1 (48:14):
Now she's just gonna stew on that text message all day.
Speaker 2 (48:18):
Yeah, Thanksgiving Day, my head hurt or my heart hurt.
But the hubs and I packed up and we went
to have a Thanksgiving with my aunt, uncle and a
few cousins and the Resso's and kids, and my grandparents
as well as my parents, who decided to make the
trip out. The only hitch was that as soon as
we walked in the house, I immediately had to run for
the bathroom as the smell of roasting turkey decided to
punt start my morning sickness. Not fun. Once my stomach settled,
(48:42):
I walked out to wide eyed family members asking if
I was okay, was I sick?
Speaker 1 (48:46):
Et cetera. I decided to.
Speaker 2 (48:48):
Break the news unconventionally and just patted my stomach and said,
I hope that doesn't mean there's gotta be a vegetarian.
Speaker 1 (48:56):
Hey, you got a choking eh.
Speaker 2 (49:00):
Bay two seconds of blank stares before the realization hit
and they were excited, screaming and squealing and hugging and
crying from the parents and grandparents. I then proceeded to
use my pregnancy to justify the amount of food I
ate at dinner nice during the boast Turkey coma, I
got a text from Rachel. It said, are you sure
(49:22):
you want to be too thick from the baby to shop?
I felt so excited and texted her back and said,
and miss out on a day with you?
Speaker 1 (49:29):
No way.
Speaker 2 (49:30):
She then said, okay, well, I think I'm gonna be
too tired to do the whole two am rash? Do
you just want to grab lunch and do a bit
of shopping after? I was disappointed, but I was honestly
relieved she didn't ignore me or bail altogether. So the
next day we got lunch and she was noticeably quieter
than usual and a little stiff.
Speaker 1 (49:47):
She didn't bring up.
Speaker 2 (49:48):
The baby at all, so I didn't instuck to other
topics like I again, I understand that she's sad, but
come on, your friend who's been trying to have a
baby for a long time. I just found out that
she's gonna have a baby, and you won't even let
her talk about it.
Speaker 1 (50:04):
Yeah, it's so weird.
Speaker 2 (50:04):
You're not even gonna be like, oh my god, I'm
so excited, like, have you picked out a name? Come on.
We then went shopping and I tried to be enthusiastic,
and I could tell she was trying to be the
same way, but it honestly all felt wrong. At one point,
she asked me if I knew it was a girl
or boy, and I said we wouldn't know for another four.
Speaker 1 (50:21):
To eight weeks.
Speaker 2 (50:23):
After a few hours, she said she was feeling tired
and that she was going to bed early tonight because
she and boyfriend were going on a trip early tomorrow morning.
I felt really sad, and I'm ashamed to say a
little angry with her. We hug goodbye, and then she said, congratulations,
O Pie, I'm happy for you.
Speaker 1 (50:40):
I know you've been trying for years.
Speaker 2 (50:42):
I hope you still have time to talk after you
have your baby. I said, of course I will, silly,
You're my best friend in the whole world, and here
she is going to need an auntie as awesome as you.
She just smiled a sad smile, and we parted ways.
I told my husband the story, and he started to
get upset and say how selfish Rachel is and how ridiculous.
(51:03):
But I just asked him please not talk bad about her,
and that she was in a difficult spot and frankly,
it hurt me too much to listen to him trash talker.
Speaker 1 (51:11):
That's also fair.
Speaker 2 (51:12):
That's fair, but also I'm on the side. Our day
could have definitely been worse, but it also could have
been a lot better. I sent her a text yesterday
saying how much fun I had with her and that
I couldn't wait to hang out with her again. But
I haven't heard from her. I'm holding out a lot
of hope, but I think I need to start preparing
myself for the possibility that our friendship.
Speaker 1 (51:33):
May not last.
Speaker 2 (51:34):
That makes me feel horribly upset, So I'm just trying
to stay busy and not let Rachel's attitude ruin my happiness.
Speaker 1 (51:42):
All in all.
Speaker 2 (51:42):
I had a great Thanksgiving with my relatives, with a
slight hiccup with the morning sickness and of course the
awkward hang out with Rachel. But I did the best
I could there. I don't know if I will update again,
but I wanted to let everyone know what happened. If
anything else comes up, I'll be sure to post thanks
again everyone, hoping you'll cross your fingers for Rachel and
me and that I have no more morning sickness and
(52:05):
there isn't edit uh oh Pie's husband here. I will
be taking this post down within the hour, and if
the mods remove it, fine by me. I have a
very upset wife crying that she's a terrible friend and
that she should have done more for Rachel, that people
are so sympathetic to Rachel and she should have done
better with her, on and on and on. If my
wife came across harsher in this post, it's because I've
(52:26):
had several discussions with her, saying she needs to stop
feeling guilty she got pregnant, that Rachel is upset, and
that she needs to put her foot down and stop
catering to everyone around her, which is what she's always doing.
I've read both posts, and my wife has been more
than generous in how she describes Rachel. Wow, Rachel is
a selfish, stupid, spoiled brat who's got even deserve a
(52:47):
friend like my wife. And if she hands the friendship
then she's cutting out the person who loves her more
than anyone else in the world. And we love when
you listen to full episodes of stories just like this.
Just go to Apple Podcast, Spotify or your favorite podcast
stop in sear Triple story Time.
Speaker 1 (53:02):
There is a little bit more, but I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (53:04):
Are people in the comments saying that OPI is being
too harsh?
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Are they?
Speaker 3 (53:08):
That's it' That's what that was wrapped in the fact
that we're getting the husband's point of view.
Speaker 2 (53:13):
Love that the husband is standing on business on it.
And if anyone saying that Opie's being too harsh, you're insane. Yeah,
because that was the nicest freaking response to a person
who's absolutely being selfish.
Speaker 1 (53:27):
I mean, Rachel clearly has her own issues. Yeah, however
her issues are self inflicted.
Speaker 3 (53:34):
She won't break it off with this guy who explicitly
has told her I don't want the things you want.
Speaker 2 (53:39):
They literally they're just they aren't they're not a good match.
They're not a good match, and she needs to break
it off and find someone who is a good match,
or stop freaking whining about it. And there's a little
bit left to the story. My wife has done countless
favors and made several sacrifices for her friends over the years,
and Rachel barely ever reciprocates. She's not infertile. She's a
(53:59):
more on who won't dump her boyfriend, who has made
it more than obvious he doesn't really care about anyone
but himself, then throws a tantrum before ignoring everyone who chooses.
Speaker 1 (54:09):
To have a life.
Speaker 2 (54:10):
Thanks to those who actually read both posts and get
what type of friend Rachel really is. I hope she
actually does end the friendship and gets her toxic immaturity
out of my wife's life, since my wife is entirely
too loyal and loves Rachel too much to do it herself. Dang,
this dude is this dude is not pulling punches.
Speaker 1 (54:30):
Yeah, that's the guy who has no rose colored glass.
Speaker 2 (54:33):
No no, no, he's like this woman sucks man.
Speaker 3 (54:36):
Yeah that's and he's right, but it's hard sometimes when
you're this You're best friends with somebody for a long time.
You learn to navigate their negative traits, and sometimes you
become blind to them.
Speaker 1 (54:48):
But this seems pretty extreme.