My boyfriend is hooking up with his coworkers…he tried to tell me it didn’t mean anything! | Reddit Stories | EP2062 - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is John, this is them Okay Storytime podcast hosts, and.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
We have some good story is coming up for you.
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
But before that, we have a little morsel of a
two minute at break from the sponsors keeping the show delicious.

Speaker 2 (00:15):
H my boyfriend is hooking up with his coworkers. He
tried to tell me it didn't mean anything. It's to
boost off his morale. I read it. I am extremely
heartbroken and in need of advice and even comfort. I
don't want to use real names, so I will be
putting in different names. Thank you for understanding. Let me
share with you all on what happened. By the way,

(00:37):
this comes from Heartbroken zero zero zero z zero on
the ur slash Ooaky Storytime Superate It. I, twenty five female,
have been dating my boyfriend twenty three mail. We will
call him Jim for a year now. It was long
distance at first, but I moved to his home state
in August so that we could be together physically. Everything
was perfect. Jim and I were extremely happy with each other,

(01:00):
always communicated, and we were just a happy couple. He
works at a cafe and there he befriended one of
his coworkers. Twenty three male we'll call him Derek. Derek
has been inviting Jim to get a few drinks after work,
and the two of them became good buds. Two good
at buds. I think I'd never met him before, and
he was really nice. Jim thought he was a cool

(01:21):
guy too. Then in mid October, Derek would invite my
boyfriend over to his place. They'll just hang order pizza
and drink some beers. Apparently, Jim would text me that
he would hang out with Derek after work then come home.
I never required him to text me where he was,
but Jim was always sweet to text me messages throughout
the day. I did the same for him too. Throughout

(01:44):
the entire night, Jim would tell me how he met
Derek's girlfriend twenty four female we'll call her Karen, and
that they were very nice people. I texted him back
that it was awesome and sweet, how the two invited
him and shared a good time with him. I thought
that was just that. So Karen and I have never
seen each other. All I knew about her was that

(02:04):
she was Derek's girlfriend. She was nice, and she was
so freaking smoking hot. And also I learned that she
and Derek moved in together like early October. I thought
that was pretty cute. That's all I knew about her.
My boyfriend started to hang out at their place more often,
and I would only think of it as something as coworkers'
friends just hanging out after work. I do admit that

(02:26):
I just felt left out and even asked Jim if
I could hang out with them. He would say it
would be a hassle, since then he would have to
come get me from work or at home, then go
to Derek's place, and also that they only hang out
for a short while. I would just say all right
and be done with it. I had a day off
work and texted my boyfriend that I'll come over to

(02:48):
his workplace to have lunch together. He told me that
would be awesome, so I went. It was pretty busy
in there, but not super busy where the workers wouldn't
be able to casually talk. I noticed my boyfriend working
and one other girl between orders. This other girl would
be touching Jim's arm and would smile at.

Speaker 3 (03:07):
Him, Well, don't smile at my man.

Speaker 2 (03:10):
She would act really flirty with him, and my boyfriend
seemed totally fine with it. It hurt because one he
was letting another girl flirt with him, and two he
always felt bothered if I would flirt with him in public.
Ooh that would biz me? Oh red flag? Mind you.
I'm not at all handsy, but I do playfully hug
his arm. Well, Jim didn't notice me in there, so

(03:33):
I just kept myself until several of the customers walked out.
Jim finally noticed me. We went out for lunch, but
on our way out, I asked him who's your coworker
and he told me it was Karen. I asked him
if he found her attractive, and he said, word for word, honestly,
not really. She's not ugly, but she's not pretty or anything. Okay, okay,

(03:56):
I mean that was a kind of a trap there.

Speaker 1 (03:58):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (03:58):
I don't know if I would have asked that, like,
did you find her pretty? I told him how I
felt about him and Karen acting that way in the cafe,
and he told me it was meaningless since that's how
Karen is. I tried extremely hard to just stop my jealousy,
but it really hurt me. I cried in the kitchen
after Jim had gone to sleep that night. Now you
need to talk to him, have a conversation with him

(04:21):
don't cry in the kitchen. A few days after that event,
Jim would be going to Derek's place after work and
would come home really late. Earlier today, he told me
he would be hanging out with Derek again, and with
my own insecurities boiling inside me, I asked Jim to
stay home with me a few times of the week
because we rarely saw each other due to our work schedules.

(04:42):
We ended up arguing, and in my anger, I snapped
at him and said something like, fine, then you can
go to your little sum.

Speaker 3 (04:49):
I mean that is what I was thinking.

Speaker 2 (04:51):
His face went pale and just a sick feeling made
me believe that what I had said out of anger
was actually true. I hope he really hit the nail
on the head, I asked him, and he admitted it.
I ultimately found out that my boyfriend has been having
reason with Derek and his girlfriend after work almost every
day since.

Speaker 3 (05:13):
October, almost every day. That's a lot of stamina.

Speaker 2 (05:16):
I asked Jim if he was by, but Jim said
they were just sharing Karen and it meant nothing and
I was only spicy sleep. It hurt a lot, Jim
and I shared the same views that an open relationship
never could work for us, that spicy sleep with another
person while in this relationship would be viewed as cheating,
and so on. He was the one who set down

(05:37):
the ground rules, and I agreed to them. We both
were very monogamous, at least I thought. I am completely heartbroken.
Jim is in the other room, just sitting at his desk,
and I'm in the bedroom bawling my eyes out while
seeking some sort of help from Reddit. Honestly, I have
no friends here. The friends I have back at home

(05:57):
didn't want me to go, and we left on bitter terms.
I am ashamed to reach out to them for help.
I just can't shake off this feeling of utter disgust
and betrayal. I love my boyfriend so much, so very much.
A pathetic part of me wants to just work on
a relationship. No, no, no, no, he don't love you
like that. I love you, but that is just a

(06:19):
horrible choice. He cheated on you. He does not love you.
I know I should leave him and go back home
or whatever, but right now I'm justin's shock. Thank you
all for your kind and caring support. Though this all
happened today, I began making my next steps. I did
end my relationship with Jim. The conversation was difficult to have,
but it needed to be ad. There were questions I

(06:40):
needed to ask for my health, such as sdis and such.
Though he did say he used protection, I still scheduled
an appointment with my doctor for this coming weekend. Good
edit to add this part in, I overheard Jim's phone
call with Derek. He told Derek what happened and ended
his relationship with him. He also said he's quitting work tomorrow.
I do feel bad, but know that is purely his decision. Yeah,

(07:04):
I mean, don't feel bad. He's cheated on you. Jim
will be moving back into his parents' place tomorrow. I
will be canceling my least tomorrow morning. I did contact
my best friend from back home and simply explain that
I will be returning home. He offered to fly up
here to help me, but I said no because I
know I will break down right now. I need to
keep strong. Seeing a friend here will only allow myself

(07:27):
to break down into a huge mess. I'm doing my
best to stay positive. I keep telling myself better now
than later. Good thing. It's only been just a year
and not five or more. Think of this as a
life lesson, do not hold grudges, and do my best
to move forward. It's hard, I admit, but continuing to
tell myself those things helps me. I would love to

(07:50):
believe that this experience has not swayed my views on relationship. Rather,
I would love to believe that this experience and relationship
has revealed a little more of myself. I still need
to do a lot of reflecting, but that can come
after I have done all the physical work moving back
to my home state. You guys can do some mental
work with us by joining us live every weekday at

(08:10):
three PMPST. Just staff our profile. But there's a little
bit more of this story. I think I'll handle that
really well.

Speaker 3 (08:16):
So well, what a good head on your shoulders, so
to the point, and like productive with your feelings, Like
I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do that.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
No, because like I know that I want to be
with them, but I also know that I shouldn't and
I won't be. You're really handling this well, and it's
gonna hurt, but you're gonna get through it.

Speaker 3 (08:34):
I've never cheated and cheated on you know, that's good.
I hope I never experienced that, but like it. It's
one of those things. From the outside, it's like I
can't really understand taking someone back if they've cheated, but
I know that it happens, and it's like, it's hard
if you've been together for so many years and you've
built up this foundation of love and what you thought
was trust, Like, can you come back?

Speaker 2 (08:56):
Well no, I mean I understand, like just even when
your brain is saying like that they're not a good
partner for you, and you're like, but I want it,
but in this case, don't take it back.

Speaker 3 (09:08):
Yeah. I don't think I could come back from a
daily thim again.

Speaker 2 (09:13):
Everything seems to be happening so fast, but it's progress.
Thank you all for your kind and loving support. I
hope my experience and progress can be of some hope
for others. I love my boyfriend extremely and though I
did not mention it in the post, I did make
a lot more sacrifices for him than he is ever
for me. Through all of that, I don't see it

(09:33):
as losing an investment in someone, but rather I am
moving on for a healthier opportunity and hopefully he will
be able to learn from this as well. I have
no plans on getting back together with him. His words
were sweet and tempting, but they were poisoned. Thank you again. Oooh,
and that is the end of that story. Yeah no,
definitely don't get back together with them. Yeah, don't. But

(09:55):
it seems like you're good. Seems like you got it
under control.

Speaker 3 (09:58):
Chillin. I just got an email exposing my wife's affair.
I don't know how to.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
Confront her, Ah send her an email.

Speaker 3 (10:06):
Would I be the a hole for telling my wife
to show me her phone after I got an email
accusing her of cheating. I male, forty seven, have a
comfortable and fulfilling life. I have a job I truly enjoy.
I live in a nice suburb, and I am blessed
with three wonderful children, eight male, six female, and four female,
and a lovely wife, Emily forty five. I've always felt

(10:26):
Emily and I were an ideal match. However, a recent
email I received has deeply unsettled me and planted a
seed of doubt in my mind. By the way, this
comes from helpful Listen seventeen sixty five on the Okay
Storytime subreddit. So Emily lived in the UK between twenty
ten and twenty fifteen, during which time she pursued a PhD.
Because she lived there so long, she pursued other things

(10:47):
to Because she lived there so long, she developed many
close friendships and has made it a point to return
every couple of years to maintain those ties. This past August,
she traveled to the UK for three weeks to attend
the way of one of her close friends. After some consideration,
we agreed that it would be best for me and
the children to remain at home, as I could not
take that much time away from work and the children

(11:09):
were unlikely to find much enjoyment in such an event.
Emily departed, returned as expected, and life returned to normal
for us. Last week, I received an email on my
work email address. It was supposedly from the wife of
Emily's friend I'll call him Jake forty four mail. According
to this woman, she has a very strong reason to

(11:29):
suspect that Jake and Emily engaged in an affair, oh
little British affair. She listed off her suspicions, noting Jake
had picked Emily up from the airport, spent considerable time
at her hotel, and how the two of them frequently
went out to dinner alone and didn't think it's just friends.

Speaker 2 (11:47):
Doesn't look good. It doesn't look good.

Speaker 3 (11:49):
She even included pictures of my wife's ear rings that
she found in Jake's pockets when she was doing the laundry,
and pictures of a lipstick stain on his shirt. This
color is There's one I recognize as something Emily often wears.

Speaker 2 (12:03):
Yeah, She's like.

Speaker 3 (12:05):
This is Emily's signature shade. There is some other evidence
she listed off, for the sake of conciseness, I will
not include them here. All this was a lot to absorb,
and for a while I thought it was some sort
of joke. So I tried my best to ignore it,
but it kept coming back into my mind. I remember
that before her trip, my wife would talk to all
her friends there. I don't know if this email is
influencing my memory, but I think she probably spoke with

(12:28):
Jake the most. Additionally, I know Emily never liked Jake's wife,
though I can't say why. I never pried into Emily's
phone or social media accounts before, but I feel very
tempted to now. However, I know i'd feel terrible if
I looked and found nothing. Also, if I start acting suspicious,
wouldn't she just delete everything out of fear of being
found out. I'm unsure of how to move forward and

(12:50):
would welcome any guidance on handling this. The best I
can currently come up with is asking to see her
phone immediately after confronting her about it, so as not
to give her now time to delete anything. The part
of me thinks this would upset her and potentially not
even show anything.

Speaker 2 (13:05):
Well, you know, if she doesn't show you anything, I
kind of also prouves, which is probably cheating. It seems
like you have a lot of overwhelming evidence here.

Speaker 3 (13:14):
I know. It's always like if you have nothing to hide,
then you're like, here, take my phone, here's my password,
here's everything.

Speaker 2 (13:20):
I think it would still probably damage the relationship, obviously, but.

Speaker 3 (13:24):
Oh yeah, because if the trust has already broken to
the point where you want to look at someone's phone,
then yeah, would I be the ahole for telling my
wife to show me her phone after I got an
email accusing her of cheating. I forgot to include my
wife no longer has these earrings. She wasn't wearing them
when she returned, and when I asked, she said she lost.

Speaker 2 (13:41):
Them, lost them in his spocket.

Speaker 3 (13:43):
A few hours after sharing my first post, I confronted Emily.
She confirmed my fears. She claims she's in love with
Jake and can't live a lie any longer. She still
claims to love me and the kids, but she says
she can't stay with us any longer. That is Terry,
I love you, but I love him more. Yeah, I
need to leave. According to her, she was waiting for

(14:05):
a better time to tell me and the children. Apparently
this has been going on since March, with Jake flying
out here occasionally and Emily secretly meeting him.

Speaker 2 (14:15):
Literally, the plot of four weddings and a funeral, the
whole thing is just them cheating the whole time. It
made me so angry. I hate the cheating movies. Like
any movie that involves cheating is part of the romance plot.

Speaker 3 (14:28):
Mmm, we're getting divorced. Emily is moving to the UK soon.
She confirmed that in August, in addition to the wedding,
she attended a job interview and she's set to start
around the new year. She's already applied for a British
visa and she plans to live with Jake when she moves.
That is wild to come back confirm your cheating. Be like,
I am leaving you and the kids.

Speaker 2 (14:49):
I'm leaving you, I'm getting my British citizenship. Eventually I'm
gonna marry him. Wow.

Speaker 3 (14:55):
I'd be heartbroken, especially as as a kid, seeing my
mom just up and leave to go with another man.
As for custody, Emily is voluntarily surrendering her chance of
full custody. She doesn't want to uproot the kids, so
they'll stay here in Canada with me. There's a part
of me that appreciates that decision, but there's also the
part that is astonished at how easily she's walking away.

(15:15):
She wants to pay child support, but I'd rather raise
my children without her financial influence. That said, the court
will likely insist on support regardless of my feelings. Emily
is also seeking structured visitation rights, which, given the circumstances,
will likely be granted. Based on what I've been told,
the court generally leans towards arrangements that allow both parents
to maintain relationships with the children even when one is

(15:38):
relocating to a different country. The lawyers are still working
out the details, but it seems like She'll have visitation
during school breaks and holidays, with the possibility of virtual
calls in between. I've been keeping things as amicable as possible,
and the more cooperative I am, the more Emily seems
to agree with my demands. We are also discussing the
future of our home. Emily has expressed a desire to

(15:59):
sell the property and divide the proceed.

Speaker 2 (16:02):
That's frustrating because that's like their children's home.

Speaker 3 (16:06):
Yeah, you're just taking that again, Like, how do you
feel like you have a right over their home when
you are literally turning their world upside down. While I
am reluctant to part with the family home, it is
unlikely I have much of a choice since it was
bought during our marriage. For now, our lawyers are still
working through the details, and wrote no final decisions have
been made. Giving the situation, it could be a good

(16:28):
while before we reach a resolution. In the meantime, I've
been advised not to make any major financial moves. As
much as I want to stay here with the children,
I know selling is most likely inevitable. As of this writing,
Emily is in an airbnb and Jake has flown here.

Speaker 2 (16:42):
To stay with her.

Speaker 3 (16:43):
Jake go away they plan on traveling to the UK
at some point in the near future. My lawyer tells
me that adultery isn't grounds for special treatment when it
comes to custody or property division. Therefore, it won't influence
how assets are divided unless marital funds are directly involved.
Emily likely used money for her personal account. Unless it
can be proven she used our joint finances to fund

(17:04):
the affair, It's unlikely this will make any difference in court.
That's interesting. I've been a regular communication with Jake's soon
to be ex wife, Eleanor, primarily through email, and more
recently we've spoken over the phone a few times. Great
plot twist. If he and Eleanor get together.

Speaker 2 (17:18):
I just want to say yes, do it.

Speaker 3 (17:20):
Eleanor apologized, saying she felt guilty for telling me about
the affair. No, yeah, come on, Otherwise, OPI would be
living a life forever and worried that if she hadn't,
maybe my marriage could have been salvaged. I reassured her
that for me, the gravity of the situation made divorce inevitable,
and I'd rather not remain in the dark about something
of this significance. She even sent me messages and other

(17:42):
evidence of their relationship, but since Emily is openly admitting
to the affair, it doesn't really matter in the context
of the law. Eleanor has also told me a lot
about Jake. Apparently this is the third time he's cheated
on her and she's had enough.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
Yeah, don't take it.

Speaker 3 (17:56):
Third time's a charm. There's no chance of reconciliation in
this time, she says, and he doesn't seem interested in trying. No.

Speaker 2 (18:03):
I mean it seems like he's moving in with freaking Emily.

Speaker 3 (18:06):
Yeah, he doesn't care. She mentioned that Jake has zero
desire to raise children who are not biologically his, which
explains why Emily's not fighting for custody. Eleanor's divorce will
most likely be much longer and more drawn out than mine,
given that both her and Jake want full custody of
their children and can't agree on several other issues. I
haven't had much time to process everything. These past two

(18:26):
weeks have felt like a blur in every way. But
one thing I can say with certainty is that I
have nothing left for Emily, not because she betrayed our marriage,
but because of how easily she's walking away from our children.
I never thought I could hate someone I once loved
so much. Oh, it's a strange feeling.

Speaker 2 (18:42):
That really got me.

Speaker 3 (18:44):
The hardest part in all of this is the children.
My two youngest daughters have started asking why their mother
isn't around as much anymore, and it's been very difficult
trying to communicate with them about the nature of the situation.
My eldest seems to understand a little more, and as
a result, he has become quiet and with t I'm
fortunate to have a family that has been incredibly supportive
so far. My children have received numerous thoughtful letters from

(19:06):
some of their cousins, which I've been reading to them
each night. All my siblings have also sent gifts for
the kids, and one of my brothers, along with his wife,
drove up to visit over the past weekend. My sister
in law even prepared plenty of food, some of which
is still in the freezer. They also kept the children
entertained while I met with my lawyer. This is a
great family.

Speaker 2 (19:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (19:26):
My other siblings have also offered to come by and
look after the kids whenever I need them, and we
actually need you, guys. Every weekday at three pm. You
can join us live on YouTube. Just tap our profile.

Speaker 2 (19:37):
Let's chat about this. I think it seems like they're
doing all of the right steps, so he is not
staying with I mean, it doesn't seem like only wants
to stay with him anyway. It sucks that you might
not be able to get the house.

Speaker 3 (19:49):
That really says. I feel like Emily's being very selfish.

Speaker 2 (19:52):
Very selfish, Like she's like, oh, well you can have
the kids, so you know, I don't want to disrupt
their life. I don't think it's les she cares about
disrupt life because she's already disrupted it.

Speaker 3 (20:02):
You're not going to live in close proximity to them,
You're leaving them for another man. You're not going to
be in their life. You don't want custody, like full custody,
and you are trying to uproot them out of the
only home they've ever known.

Speaker 2 (20:15):
No, she doesn't care about the kids. She just wants
to like start this fun new life in the UK,
and she doesn't want to have to take her kids
with her.

Speaker 3 (20:23):
Beyond that, my parents have been calling daily to check
in on us, and my seventy eight year old mother
has already made plans to stay with us for two
weeks in November to help around the house. The collective
effort of my family has made this experience much more bearable,
and I'm deeply grateful for all their support. To everyone
who encouraged me to speak with Emily after my last post,

(20:44):
I'm grateful. I was tempted to ignore Eleanor's message, but
it kept gnawing at me. Your advice gave me the
courage to act. Emily has shown herself to be a liar,
and I have no doubt that her idea of a
better time was simply when it would cause the least
inconvenience for her and Jake. Yeah, I'm sorry. Ope, you're
going through it, but you're doing a great job, and

(21:04):
it seems like, do you care about the kids. You're
creating a warm environment for them to transition through this.

Speaker 2 (21:09):
I think it's just like letting them know that they're
loved and they've got a whole huge support system. Because
it's gonna be obviously, like so hard for you, it's
gonna be really tough for them too. Yeah, that's the
end of that story. I was betrayed by my boyfriend
and my best friend, so I cut them both out.
Of my life out two for one. Laura thirty female

(21:30):
and I thirty female, met when we started university, and
we clicked right away. We did everything together. She became
like the sister I never had. I'd bring her home,
and my parents loved her so much that they treated
her like one of their own. By the way, this
comes from aid relists on the r slash Okay storytime
subbured it. So when Laura told me she was struggling financially,

(21:52):
I didn't think twice. My parents run a small business,
so I convinced them to give her a job. I
thought I was helping my best friend, and that's how
much I trusted her. Around the same time, I met
Kyle thirty one male, who eventually became my boyfriend. From
the very beginning, there was something between us. We had
this instant chemistry and what started as a connection grew

(22:16):
into a beautiful relationship. Kyle made me feel so loved
so seen I thought we had something real and lasting,
like we were building a future together. No, but there
was always this thing off with Laura. Instead of being
happy for me, I noticed these small, subtle moments where

(22:36):
it felt like she resented my happiness. I ignored it,
thinking I was just imagining things because she was my
closest friend. A year into our friendship, Laura failed one
of her classes and had to repeat the year, while
I moved ahead jealousy. This meant I had to move
to another city to continue my studies. Kyle also fell

(22:57):
behind a year because he started working and I couldn't
manage both his job and his classes. So now you're
best friend and your boyfriend at together. So we started
a long distance relationship. It wasn't easy, but at first
we made it work. We visited each other often and
things seemed fine, though it was hard being a part.

(23:17):
Six months into the long distance, though, I started noticing
a change in Kyle. He became distant, less affectionate, less present.
It was like he was slowly pulling away. I couldn't
shake the feeling that something was wrong. Naturally, I turned
to Laura. I confided in her, pouring out my worries
about Kyle, hoping for some support. Instead, she shocked me.

(23:42):
She told me I should just break up with him,
that Kyle wasn't good for me. Her words felt cold,
almost calculated. I think she's trying to move in. That's
when the suspicions crept in. I couldn't shake the feeling
that something was going on between them. She's like, you
should just break up. He's not good for you, and
if you with him, I'm just taking one from the team.
I'm actually helping you. You're walk go. Kyle continued to

(24:04):
grow more distant, and my gut feeling was screaming at me,
trust your instincts. They don't lie men. One day I
saw something that confirmed all my worst fears, a photo
of Kyle on Laura's phone, Like, what kind of photo?
I'm convinced she let me see it on purpose. Yeah,
she wanted to break you guys up, and Kyle wasn't
quick enough.

Speaker 3 (24:23):
I don't like her.

Speaker 2 (24:24):
She's terrible. Don't like her like she wanted me to know.
I confronted them both separately, and they denied everything at first,
but then Lara broke down, crying and confessed the truth.
She and Kyle had been seeing each other behind my
back for three months.

Speaker 3 (24:40):
Oh my gosh.

Speaker 2 (24:41):
There's more to the story. But Lara definitely was trying
to let you know. Like I feel like if she
wanted to hide it, she would have done better, But
she wanted him to break up with you, so that's
she could datum, this is so messed up.

Speaker 3 (24:54):
I'd be so heartbroken if a friend did this to me.

Speaker 2 (24:57):
Why are we being attracted to our friend's cart You
have the same taste.

Speaker 3 (25:02):
I know, buy it when someone's in a relationship, let
them be.

Speaker 2 (25:06):
Thou shalt not covet your friend's man. No, no no.

Speaker 3 (25:10):
And also, like I know, girl code is maybe like
don't date the people that your friends have dated, and
I feel like that is ideal, But if down the
line they were to break up and you truly felt
this was your soul.

Speaker 2 (25:21):
Mate, but to cheat, to cheat, I truly don't understand
because I'm legitimately not attracted to any of my friends,
not even like, uh, they're ugly. I'm just like, we
have different tastes. But that wasn't even the worst part.
Laura actually at the nerve to say that it was
my fault. She told me that because I had moved
to another city, I wasn't taking care of him like

(25:42):
I should have. And then she had the audacity to
tell me I should be grateful she was looking after
him for me. Can you imagine my best friend and
my boyfriend buttraying me together, and she had the gall
to act like she was doing me a favor. I
cut both of them out of my life immediately. Good
get them out of there. I couldn't even look at them.
But the story doesn't end there. Three months later, Kyle

(26:04):
moved to the city where I was living. No stopped
chasing her, let her go. We ended up at the
same university, and I'd run into him all the time.
Every time he saw me, Kyle would apologize, saying he
made a huge mistake, that he loved me, that he
wanted to get back together. He was constantly looking for me,
trying to reconnect, telling me over and over again how

(26:26):
sorry he was. This guy sucks. But by then I
was completely shattered. I had cried myself to sleep so
many nights, feeling like my entire world had been ripped apart.
I couldn't trust either of them anymore. The pain, the betrayal.
I felt like I had been stabbed in the back
by the two people I cared about most. I was devastated.
No matter how many times Kyle told me he loved me,

(26:47):
it didn't matter anymore. I was broken. The pain ran
so deep, and it was all I could do to
just keep going. And then, as if fate hadn't already
twisted the knife enough, I found out a few months
later that Laura was frightened with Kyle's child.

Speaker 3 (27:02):
You call that like, I feel for Op, but I'm
glad this is in my life.

Speaker 2 (27:07):
Like I'm so sorry, I'm so glad this isn't me.

Speaker 3 (27:11):
That is way too much. You dodged a bullet, Op,
you really did, Okay, and I know that that's hurtful,
but like now you can move forward because this is
too much.

Speaker 2 (27:20):
I can't even describe the level of disgust and devastation
I felt. It was like a final blow. The betrayal
was complete. To make it even more twisted, all our
mutual friends cut ties with her too. They finally saw
what I had missed, how jealous she had been of
me all along, how toxic she really was. I couldn't
believe how blind I'd been, how stupid I felt for

(27:41):
trusting her so completely. In the end, despite everything, I
wished them happiness, well I had to. They deserved each other.
Two people who had lied, cheated, and betrayed me behind
my back. They were perfect for each other. It really
is funny because I know people are like this, who
are like the you know, the two worst people, And

(28:02):
I'm like, they're still together.

Speaker 3 (28:04):
They deserve each other, They're on the same level.

Speaker 2 (28:06):
Years later, I ran into Laura again. She had the
audacity to ask if we could be friends, claiming enough
time it passed and that we should be mature about it.

Speaker 3 (28:14):
No, enough time has not passed when you do something
that diabolical.

Speaker 2 (28:18):
No, no, no, no. She even wanted me to meet
her son. Should I be mature enough to forgive them
for everything? Or is it time to prioritize my own piece,
prioritize your own piece, and you should prioritize us. Every
week to three pm PST. Just have her profile. But
there is a little update to these people are terrible.
Cut them out of your life forever. You don't know
them anything. Let them have their little family life together. Ikey,

(28:41):
I literally have nothing to say about this other than like,
never talk to them again, and I'm so sorry. But
there is an update. I've seen a lot of people
asking if Kyle and Laura are still together, and the
answer is, I honestly don't know. Some mutual friends told
me once that Kyle never really considered Laura his official partner,
and that he thinks she got pregnant to trap.

Speaker 3 (29:00):
Him because she is manipulative.

Speaker 2 (29:02):
Wouldn't put it past her, oh my, because she's kind
of manipulated this whole thing. There is a world where
she was so jealous that Kyle still like, even after
she broke Opee and Kyle up, he was still choosing Opee,
where she was like so jealous, she was like, what's
the only way that I can get him have a baby? Yeah,
according to them, Kyle doesn't post anything on social media

(29:24):
about her, just the child, who must be about three
years old.

Speaker 3 (29:27):
Now.

Speaker 2 (29:28):
Meanwhile, she always uploads pictures of the three of them together, embarrassing.
As for my relationship with her, there isn't one. I
haven't spoken to Laura in years. Good. The last time
I saw her was by accident. I bumped into her
at a pharmacy. When she saw me, she acted all
excited and tried to hug me. It was so uncomfortable.
I pretended I was on the phone just to avoid
talking to her. But that's the end of that story.

(29:50):
Cut the toxic people out of your life. Yeah, Now
today you can go one eight Andrew to cut the
toxic people out of your life, or you can call
us and we'll cut them out for you.

Speaker 3 (29:59):
I'm exact us did by people's trauma.

Speaker 2 (30:01):
They've got so much it just keeps coming. But sorry, Op,
and I'm glad that you're three years out of that
because they're still stuck in it. Man. But that's the
end of that story. Hey, it's Sam, your og host here.
We're gonna get back to the stories. But here's three
minutes of ads from our sponsors. My best friends and
I planned a trip together. I just found out they
booked it without me. No, I don't like that. That's

(30:25):
so mean. Me twenty four female, and my two best
friends twenty three female went to university together and immediately
got close. We were inseparable all of the three years
of studying. However, this summer we graduated and moved completely
different places. By the way, this comes from Lebree on
the r slash Okay storytime suffered it. We talk daily

(30:47):
and our group chat catch up over FaceTime. One of
the two got a job in another country in Europe,
and ever since she knew she was going to move there,
we have been planning and been so excited to visit
her for New Year's Eve. Five days ago, I texted
them to arrange a FaceTime call to start planning and
booking our trip. Later that night, the friend working abroad

(31:07):
called me and suggested we could come later in the
spring instead, when it's warmer, and that she thought she
might not get days off work. But just now she
suddenly posted a screenshot on her private story of Snapchat
messages between them that the third friend had booked a
flight for New Year's Eve. I just don't know what
to feel. Why would they post it when they know

(31:29):
you could see.

Speaker 3 (31:30):
That social media. It's so easy to just keep stuff
off of social media.

Speaker 2 (31:35):
So easy. If you're going to be awful, don't post
about it. True. I just don't know what to feel.
I feel so disappointed and left out. We have done
things together before where two of us would hang out
and not include the third. But we have traveled together
many times and we've always agreed on that we have
so much fun traveling together. How should I go on

(31:55):
and approach this. I need advice, as I'm not the
confrontational type and we've never really had arguments before. I
don't want to come across as petty, although I kind
of am, and also I don't want to be invited
out of pity. I can't think of anything that would
make them be mad at me or anything like that. Okay,
writing this out, I think I really wanted to vent.
But also I would love some advice on how to

(32:16):
deal with this. I don't want to create bad vibes
between us, But how would you go about this with
close friends? Maybe someone has experienced similar situations and there
is an update. What's your initial advice here?

Speaker 3 (32:29):
I would have a conversation. I don't know if you
need to have all three because I think no, But
I think if there's one friend in the group that
you feel closest too, that you trust the most, going
to them and just being like, hey, I'm feeling some
type of way about this, I just want to know, like,
was this on purpose?

Speaker 2 (32:43):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (32:43):
Did you just want it to be you?

Speaker 2 (32:44):
Three? Okay, so it's time for an update. I'm so
thankful for everyone commenting on my posts and sending me
private messages. Thank you so much for your insight. It
has really helped me to think this all through. I
wrote the post crying in the bathroom while working my
night shift. I went to bed with two comments, and
after sleeping for almost twelve hours. I woke up to

(33:05):
one hundred. At this point, the whole day had almost
gone by night shift week equals I slept all Friday,
and I still hadn't heard from them. Honestly, I got
so mad and had no hope left that I would.
While trying to read through all of the comments on
here and decide on what to do, I got a
text in the group chat she had booked a flight

(33:26):
and that I should join that one.

Speaker 3 (33:28):
Mm.

Speaker 2 (33:29):
Oh, so, what so now they're excluding? I waited until
after breakfast before I replied ha ha, but ultimately answered
that I didn't understand that I did not feel welcome
to join when they had already planned it all without me.
The last thing I heard was that we should do
it later, and then I found and then I find
out via your snapchat story. They immediately told me that

(33:51):
was not their intention at all. They said they were
really sorry I felt that way and didn't want me
to feel excluded. A broad girl called me on FaceTime immediately,
and she told me that they hadn't really spoken that
much at all, and that it was a spontaneous decision
that flightgirl had made minutes before the snapchat post was made.
She said she understood why I felt that way, but

(34:12):
that she always hoped I would come along as well.
And there is there's more to this story, but really quick,
I think it's still really hurtful, regardless of whether or
not you know that was a conscious decision to exclude her,
but it's still I feel like you still get in
that mindset of like even though it was a snap decision,
In that snap decision, you thought about any other people, yeah,

(34:33):
and not me, absolutely, Like I wasn't the one that
came to your mind. And that still is hurtful.

Speaker 3 (34:38):
Absolutely, Any type of exclusion hurts.

Speaker 2 (34:40):
Yeah, regardless of it's if it's intentional or not. Yeah.
Later I got a FaceTime call from flight Girl. She
tried to explain how she felt the need to just
book the flight after debating for so long if she
could afford it, and that she ultimately just decided to
do it, that we had been talking about it for
so long and didn't want to wait any longer. But
you can always just text in the group. Job said me,

(35:01):
you know what, I'm just gonna get these tickets. I
repeatedly said. She was sorry she didn't consult me first.
She also knew that a broad girl might have to work,
but that she wanted to go anyways, I admit that
I didn't get to say all I wanted to say,
and I should have taken the tip of writing it
down before I got on the calls. In my head,
it just didn't make sense to be hyped for a
girls trip and to just book by themselves if they

(35:22):
were really excited for me to come along. I just
felt it wasn't like them to do it like that
when we've always arranged meetups for these things earlier, booking, planning, hyping,
pinter spoards, etc. Although I don't think I got to
express this as much as I would like, looking back,
I feel they understood. I guess them texting me first
was what I hoped for, but I still felt a

(35:44):
little weird about it. I don't know if I'm going
to go, but honestly I don't think I will. Me
trying to avoid conflict, as usual, told them I had
to look into it if I would get work off
on those days. A lot of you guys thought I
should cut them off, and I had and had. I
never got that text first. I honestly don't know where
I would stand not saying they made up for it.

(36:06):
I still think it was really crappy, but I think
they know that now. I feel lighter. Had I not
talked to them today, I don't think I would be
over it easily. These are close friends. I know and
love them on such a deep level, and they know
and love me. But for now they know where I stand.
If something like this happens again, it will not be
taken lightly. And you know what should never be taken lightly.

(36:29):
Joining us live every week day at three PMPSD. Just
tap our provat and again there's just a little bit
left to the story. But I think I think that
this is not an end the friendship. No, I was
surprised to hear it. Yeah, it seems like they had
handled it pretty mature. Yeah. And also pe, if you
feel like you didn't get to say everything that you
wanted to say, you know you could still go and

(36:51):
there's no time limit on it.

Speaker 3 (36:53):
That's true. I feel like that's huge in friendships, not
letting things fester and then build resentment, Like better to
just share how you're feeling, be like, hey, that kind
of hurt me. I felt left out. I felt like
I was an afterthought, I think that's what it is.

Speaker 2 (37:06):
It's the main thing. Yeah, m M, yeah, yeah, But
it seems like at least they texted you, you talked
about it a little bit, and I think at the
end of the day, you don't have to go on
the trip, regardless of whether or not you guys hashed
it out or not sure, if it still bothers you, you
can be like, you know what, I'm going to sit
this one out. But yeah, it's good that you talked
to your friends. Yeah, I don't know if I'm just

(37:27):
naive at this point. I certainly hope i'm not. But
it's not like them to keep me in the dark
on purpose, and I hope they understand how much my
heart sank when I saw that snapchat post. I'm so
sorry to hear about your experiences with crappy friends in
the comments, and I feel for you and admire you
for standing your ground and cutting them off. I'm trying
to reflect on how I should navigate this friendship from

(37:49):
now on and be a little observant to it if
it becomes a pattern when it comes to these friends.
Please let me know if you have opinions on this
or questions or anything at all. Peace didn't really this
post turned out so long and additional information from Opi
Opie says, okay, f when I posted this, I realized
how pissed really am I really am? What the hell?

(38:11):
I want to give them the benefit of the doubt,
but it doesn't sit right with me. No, why am
I so back and forth? Like if it feels like
a pity invite and that kind of means I was
never part of the plan, and that really ooh after
so bad up He's like, type of this whole thing
out and it's like, you know what, you know we've
and then comes back and it's like, no, I'm actually
really angry about this still, and that's okay. That is okay.

(38:32):
You can have multiple feelings about it that just keep
talking to your friends. That's all you can do. And
if you realize, you know, if you I think, if
it's a consistent thing where they constantly are you know,
you're an aptterthoughts they're not thinking about you, that it's
time to maybe take a step back reevaluate those friendships.
But it's just something to keep an eye out for now.

(38:52):
But that's the end of that story.

Speaker 3 (38:55):
I just found out my friends mocked me in a
group chat. I pretended I didn't know. Why would you
pretend you don't know?

Speaker 2 (39:02):
You gotta.

Speaker 3 (39:07):
I am Ron twenty eight male, and I'm currently living
with my roommate, Emma fake names twenty seven female. She
is my younger sister's best friend, and I knew I've
known her since we were kids. Originally, my sister was
living with us, but she left to study abroad, and
now she lives there with her fiance. By the way,
this comes from Pohbody's nerfic zero two that really did

(39:29):
something in my brain on the Okay storytime subreddit. So
it's her late ant's apartment, so she lets me stay
there without paying rent, but we share bills and chores.
Great deal, if you ask me. I never had a
problem with me and Emma living together. There were never
any romantic feelings both ways. I respected her boyfriends and
she respected my girlfriends. I think of her as a
part of my family, like a sister. Two months ago,

(39:51):
while she was taking a shower, I saw a notification
on her phone with my name on it, and I
looked at it and it said I found the perfect
girl for prank.

Speaker 2 (40:01):
What the frick? Why are we involved?

Speaker 3 (40:04):
Why are we doing this? I got curious and opened
her phone since I know her pass code. There I
saw how basically all our mutual friends except a few
I had from my army days and my childhood best
friend who lives in another city, were all members of
a group chat that started a month ago. And there
they were all sharing memes and gifts, mocking me about

(40:25):
my appearance, and basically I became the equivalent of ugly
to them. I couldn't understand why they were so mean,
since I genuinely thought we had a good relationship and friendship.
That would surprise me too, Like I think we're all chill,
and then you guys are bad mouthing me.

Speaker 2 (40:39):
In a group chat. God, oh my god, rude.

Speaker 3 (40:42):
As I was scrolling all the way back, I found
out that everything started after my roommate told one of
her friends that she's so corny she's thinking of effing
the old and fat hobo who's sleeping on our rooftop sometimes.
Her friend replied that I'm single too and she could
f me, and my roommate answered, she's not that desperate yet,
and they both share laughing emojis and stuff. Then they

(41:05):
kept at it by posting puking emojis when they talked
how they imagine I had spicy sleep.

Speaker 2 (41:10):
Oh my god.

Speaker 3 (41:11):
Then other friends started getting into the joke, and soon
they created an entire group just so they could share
humiliating posts about me. They even started using I'd rather
f the ovo as an inside joke, which I heard
them say a few times but didn't know what it
meant until now.

Speaker 2 (41:29):
Everyone in that group chat needs to get a hobby,
because they clearly have too much times.

Speaker 3 (41:35):
I was standing there reading all these comments, feeling numb
and not knowing how to react. They also planned to
pull a prank on me. They would have a really
pretty girl flirt with me and ask me out, and
when I would go to the dates, she would stand
me up and they would have a bet of how
long I would wait for her. You guys, this isn't
really awful, This isn't funny. I would not do that

(41:55):
to anybody, anyone, not to anyone because they're not an ahole. Obviously,
since I knew their plans, I rejected the girl's advances
to I imagine all of their surprise. Now I'm not
insecure about my appearance. I know I'm not good looking.

Speaker 2 (42:11):
Hey, hey, let's objective.

Speaker 3 (42:13):
Yeah, but I never had trouble finding girls, and despite
what they wrote, they didn't make me feel ugly or
sorry for myself. I'm just hurt that they would do
something like that, since I never did anything to warrant
such mockery. Of course, I'm more hurt about Emma, and
I'm mostly confused since I know she cares a lot
about me. Three years ago, I had a motorcycle accident
and she practically slept in the hospital for the ten
days I was there, and after we came back home,

(42:35):
she helped me all the time until I got better.
So I don't know why she would do something so
mean towards me personally. I think it was just a
joke comment that got out of hand. After that, I
stopped hanging out with them. I started using work as
an excuse, but I limited my interactions with all of them,
including Emma. If I knew they'd be at home, i'd
stay longer at work or go for a walk until
they left, or I'd go out with my other friends

(42:58):
I know need a new roommate. If they suggest a
night out, I'd say I was tired from work, or
sick and wouldn't go. I've cried a few times. I
stayed home thinking about the whole situation. Emma asked me
the other day if everything is all right, and I
told her I had some pressure at work since I'm
aiming for a promotion. How are Why? Yeah? Why wouldn't
you just be straight up and say you're heard? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (43:19):
You guys, that's not a lie.

Speaker 3 (43:22):
Actually, our company is opening a new branch in another city,
and I was originally asked to relocate there, but I
declined since I would be all alone and had to
start my social circle from zero. But after that I
talked with my boss and I agreed to relocate once
the facilities are ready, which is in January twenty twenty
five according to schedule. I haven't told anyone about this yet.

(43:44):
This might be a good change, Honestly, get out of
this negative space, negative energy. The reason for this post
is that about a week ago, I once again looked
at her phone to see if they kept the group
chat there. I saw that they kept making fun of me,
but some of them pointed out that I stopped interacting
with them and wondered if I was all right or
if something had happened to me.

Speaker 2 (44:03):
That's crazy at it, that's crazy. They're like, Oh, you
hope he's so freaking ugly. Ope, he's not doing well.

Speaker 3 (44:11):
Wild One even asked if there's a chance I know
about them making fun of me, but they all dismiss that,
saying they haven't said anything, and they even dared to
say that even if I knew, it's all harmless. Anyways,
Emma told them about my promotion, and that convinced them
that I'm just stressed about work, and then they continued
mocking me with memes, this time about my job.

Speaker 2 (44:32):
What who are these people?

Speaker 3 (44:35):
Not nice people and people you need to get away from.
I don't even know their motives. At this point, I
don't get it at all. I realize that there's no
going back anymore. But I also realized that in the
last two months I haven't had any fun. So my
plan now is to keep pretending I don't know anything,
but start hanging out with them again, because since I
won't see them anymore after five months, I can at
least have some fun. I used to like going out

(44:55):
with them, so for the next few months, I can
pretend they're still my friends. We actually do plan to
go out all together to see a movie and.

Speaker 2 (45:01):
Then for some drinks.

Speaker 3 (45:03):
When time comes and I'm ready to leave, I leave
without informing anyone, including Emma, and once I'm out, in
a way, i'll block them all besides Emma, since I
care about her and want her to know that despite anything,
I'm there for her, and if anyone tries to contact
me or pretend they care about me leaving, I'll simply
send Emma the screenshots of their chat and I hope

(45:23):
this will shut them up anyway. Sorry for my English,
I'm not a native speaker. Thanks if anyone read it.
I don't think there's anything wrong, which is going to
Emma and just being like, hey, I saw the group
chat I saw.

Speaker 2 (45:33):
I think that if you care like it seems like
op he still cares about Emma and still wants a
relationship despite all of this, So I think that you
should go to her and say, hey, it's all of this.

Speaker 1 (45:42):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (45:42):
I didn't expect all the support and love.

Speaker 2 (45:44):
Thank you.

Speaker 3 (45:45):
I realized that it's a situation that most people wouldn't
want to be in, so Treasure, you're real friends. I
want to clarify some things. As I mentioned in my post,
I do have friends outside that group.

Speaker 2 (45:56):
I have my army.

Speaker 3 (45:57):
I have my Army brothers that we meet twice a month,
message a lot who I know have my back as
I have theirs, and my best friend who lives in
another city that will be very close to me after
I leave.

Speaker 2 (46:07):
That's amazing.

Speaker 3 (46:07):
It's basically an hour driving. We talk daily, and I
think he'll be excited once he finds out I'm going
to be so close to him. The people in the
group chat are mostly our mutual friends since university or
past jobs. Not all of them talk bad about me,
but they're all members there, so they're all in it,
so I guess it's the same in a way. They
usually hang out at our place where we watch movies,

(46:28):
playboard games, etc. I feel bad for losing them, but
it doesn't compare in the thought of losing my best
friend or my army brothers. Right, You're real friends that
wouldn't talk crap about you. About my sister, I didn't
tell her because then she would tell Emma, and then
they'd all know, which is what I've been trying to avoid.
If I wanted them to know, I tell them. I'm

(46:49):
not afraid to tell them because I'm desperate for their friendship. No,
I don't want to tell them because I don't want
the drama. I want to avoid it. I work more
now in my job to learn my new role, so
the last thing I want to deal with is all
of that drama or fake apologies, etc. I'd rather be
just me pretending I don't know, than all of them
pretending they're sorry.

Speaker 2 (47:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (47:11):
I understand why some people don't want me to hang
out with them and just expose them to everything, but
it wouldn't benefit me to do it. All I would
gain is drama and awkward situations. I'd rather focus on
me planning my departure, get ready for my new role,
and figure the aftermath. In the meantime, I don't think
it would do me any good to end things with
them now. I figure I can't make new friends or

(47:32):
seek out a girlfriend in this city since I'm leaving,
so I can manage a few months in their company
instead of closing off to myself, and then we have
a little bit more Second edit, I wasn't expecting so
much attention, to be honest, and it's not something I wanted.
I just wanted to vent, like a don't want drama.
I don't don't want this. I just wanted to event

(47:54):
get it out of my chest and move on with
my life, maybe have a few comforting comments or even
someone point out my fault. But it's been only a
day and I see there's too much traffic on my
story and it makes me uncomfortable. Uh someone said my
story made it to TikTok, like WTF. I hope I
didn't make a mistake by sharing it, because the last
thing I want is for someone to figure out who

(48:14):
I am. I thought by sharing it on Reddit that
they never use, i'd be safe. But I don't know
what will happen if it goes out to other platforms.
Since they don't use English as much, I hope it
won't reach them, and if it does, they won't know
what it is about. I was gonna think of a
cute transition, I don't have one. By the way, you
can join us live on YouTube every weekday at three
pm PST. Just have our profile. I want to thank

(48:36):
you all again for your support. Honestly, you seem like
a great community. I won't add anything else to my
post again. I will try to answer as many comments
as I can. If I don't.

Speaker 2 (48:45):
I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 (48:47):
I guess since a lot of you asked this of me.
I will update once everything goes through, So maybe in
a year or earlier. I hope I won't forget about
this post and the love you showed me until then.
By and take care of yourselves. So Obi is like
so nice, Yeah, because.

Speaker 2 (49:02):
Like seems like a really great person and your friends.

Speaker 1 (49:05):
Really.

Speaker 3 (49:06):
Yeah, I'm sorry. That's actually very it's very hurtful, and
I think the more I think about it quite traumatic. Oh.
I don't know if after something like that happened to me,
if I'd be able to look at a friend group
the same way. I don't think I would, especially if
I entered into a new friend group and had to
build those relationships and just constantly felt insecure and like rama.

Speaker 2 (49:26):
Yeah, so it's like, how do you gain back that
trust in people?

Speaker 3 (49:30):
Yeah, I'm glad you're moving on. I'm glad you're able
to like fresh start, fresh star, be near your og
army friends and other best friend and just you know,
do you and don't let anybody bring you down?

Speaker 1 (49:42):
You do you?

Speaker 2 (49:43):
Boo?

Speaker 1 (49:43):
Yeah, Hey it's John here. We're gonna get back to
the stories. Put a quick three minute ad break from
our sponsors that keep the show going.

Speaker 2 (49:50):
My roommate's karaoke party ruined my night. Now I want
to move out. They went too hard.

Speaker 3 (49:56):
What songs were they singing?

Speaker 2 (49:58):
What pissed you off? They don't love you, GOLLA. Last
night was rough. But before I get to that, I
want to explain and add some context about our living situation.
I twenty five female, live with my best friend B
twenty five female and her friend A twenty four mail
let's call him Betty and Andrea. Me and Betty are

(50:20):
coworkers and we wake up at every day at eight am,
while Andrea gets up at six am. We live in
an apartment building with no neighbors, and we have a
large speaker to host karaoke parties. By the way, this
comes from dry Inflation thirty four to ninety eight on
the Arslas Shoke Storytime suburt It. I am on the
introverted side because social gatherings tend to stress me out.

(50:40):
I can handle them from time to time, but I
need to isolate to recharge. Yesterday, we had a rough
shift at work, so during our break I told Betty
I need to get some alone time after we get home.
Because I have not been able to since I moved
in five months ago. Betty tends to really enjoy my
company and can be introverted as well. However, I have
been feeling overwhelmed lately since we're socializing way too much

(51:04):
more than what I'm comfortable with, and I thought expressing
this to her would help her understand I need a
bit of distance to enjoy my hobbies. I have three
cats in our apartment and they seem to like it here.
Both my roommates love the company of cats and we
have had no issues except for one. Betty will often
throw a karaoke party with a lot of her friends
without notice, and I can confirm this stresses out my cats.

(51:28):
I moved into this apartment maybe two months after they
got situated, so in return, I got the smallest room
in the apartment. Due to this arrangement, I often keep
my doorked open so they so that my cats can
freely roam the house, tend to the litter box, drink water,
and eat some dry kibble if needed. My roommates will
close their doors at night for privacy. I don't mind

(51:50):
her throwing parties if that's what she wants to do.
But I will admit it would be nice to get
a heads up so that I'm not so surprised that
a lot of people are in the common area. I
like mentally preparing myself before I get thrown into a
social gathering. I plan to relax and play some video
games during the evening before a shift tomorrow morning. When
I noticed more people kept showing up, my friend Betty

(52:13):
invited at least nine people to our apartment, and three
I have never met before. She threw a party without
any warning or notice, no text or nothing. My suspicion
is she felt comfortable enough to not warn us because
we're all friends and chill about anything. I wish, though,
that she would be more considerate of people's schedules, because
we do all have to sleep for our morning shifts. Absolutely,

(52:35):
I think we need to establish roommate etiquette. Yeah, if
this is a problem for you and she just like
isn't realizing, you just need to talk, have a conversation.

Speaker 3 (52:44):
Shit, nine people over without even a text, I'd be
a little pissed off.

Speaker 2 (52:50):
Yeah, the karaoke was so loud and didn't end until
one am. They were all and having fun. I didn't
say anything because I wanted to be a good friend
and not embarrasser in front of her party. I was
getting tired by eleven PM, so I started laying down
and tried to distract myself by watching TV. At midnight,
my sweetest cat Airy laid on me and I started

(53:12):
to feel a warm liquid seeping through the comforter.

Speaker 3 (53:15):
No.

Speaker 2 (53:17):
I jolted up in shock and started stripping my bed immediately.
I had a lot of mixture of emotions. I was
not angry at my cat because I understood at that
moment she probably was too freaked out to use the
litter box. Since there are so many strangers in the house,
it disrupts their evening routine and the loud noises would
overwhelm me too. The litter box is located closer to

(53:40):
the living room since it cannot fit into my bedroom
or anywhere else The party is coming from the living room.
I also cannot conveniently move the litter box around because
it is self automated plugged into a wall. After I
noticed my cat at Peede so much, I immediately started
washing my comforters and decided there is no way I
can make it to work in the morning. Stayed up

(54:00):
until four am, washing everything because cat pissed lingers if
not taken care of a SAP. I was pissed, disappointed, restless, pissed, depressed, confused,
and shocked. I don't understand why my friend had to
specifically throw a random, loud karaoke party after I told
her I don't want to socialize at all that day.

(54:21):
I think maybe this friend, if she just wasn't thinking,
it might have been like, oh, you don't want to socialize.

Speaker 3 (54:27):
You can stay in your room.

Speaker 2 (54:28):
Yeah, and I'd just going to stay inside.

Speaker 3 (54:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (54:32):
That might have been which is still I mean, like
she still should have absolutely talked to you about this
and stuff, But that might have been the Like it
might not have been a personal attack.

Speaker 3 (54:40):
On you, probably not, but it's it's but it's still
it's still.

Speaker 2 (54:43):
You know a thing about respect and making sure that
your boundaries are being met. It's either a coincidence or
she did it on purpose. Random friends were trying to
get me to come out of my room to join
in the fun and barging in to see what I
was doing before the cat pee occurred. They were all
I also, I don't understand how my friend would throw
a party while she knows we have work tomorrow morning.

(55:04):
I had to sit on my mattress with no sheets,
having a panic attack while I waited for an hour
for the karaoke to stop. I feel so bad for
my cats that it has given me ideas to completely
break the least agreement with them and live on my own.
At one thirty am, I saw my friend approaching the
bathroom and she strikes a conversation with me. I told
her about my cat peeing on me, and her first

(55:26):
instinct is to laugh as if it's a funny joke.
My cat beeat a lot, and she tried to blame
it on gall bladder issues, when it is obviously due
to high stress of strangers croaking on the microphone. I
try to explain to her how much it scares cats
when the it is abrupt changes to their environment. I
also told her I had informed her boss I won't

(55:46):
be coming to work for the morning at twelve thirty
am because I have to wash my sheets. So she
texted at twelve thirty like at midnight. She doesn't have
a car, so I drive us both to work, and
I tried to inform her earlier by texting she will
have to walk to work, hoping she realizes she needs
to wrap things up. She said she didn't see my
text at all since her phone was charging. But you

(56:08):
can see us every weekday on YouTube at three PMPSD.
You just to have her profile and there is a
little bit left to the story. But what are your thoughts.

Speaker 3 (56:16):
I just think it's it's hard for me to not
now after reading that last bit, be like, OHP's being
a little over dramatic, a little sensitive.

Speaker 2 (56:25):
Yeah, And this might be because I have a completely
different take on like I have a different reaction, you know.

Speaker 3 (56:31):
Yeah, I think I think. Look, I think a lot
of us have lived with roommates where are compatible exactly,
You're not compatible, your lifestyles are different, whatever it is.
I've been in places where I'm trying to sleep and
people are being so loud. But you have to pick
and choose your battles. And I think that had Op's

(56:53):
roommate been like, I'm gonna have people over, like when
do you need them out by, like have a bit
of a compromise or communication right, then we would have
been good. I think it's that the roommate didn't ask
at all.

Speaker 2 (57:07):
Yes, I think there I would say roommate is in
a hole, but also pee overreacted a little bit. I
think that's my thing because I agree. I think absolutely
the roommate should have texted yaid, hey, people are coming over. Also,
I think that you know those are your cats if
your cat pete.

Speaker 3 (57:26):
Look, animals are going to be animals, and sometimes they're
not going to pee in the little box or outside
whatever it may be.

Speaker 2 (57:32):
But like, the thing is like if you had known
that people were coming over, they still would appeeded because
you can't tell cats that people are coming over. I
mean maybe you could take precautions against it. Yeah, but
I mean yeah, so it's like you can't really blame
your like that they would appeed regardless. But there's a
little bit more this point. I'm not sure I want
to keep living with them at all. I have trouble

(57:54):
standing up for myself and lack social skills to be assertive.
I am too nice with people pleasing tendencies. I did
let her know before that I needed warnings for parties,
but you still doesn't do that, which is not fair.
I think I would do so much better if I
remove myself from this environment. It would be relieving if
I had a place to myself and my cats. I
can completely have control over who comes over and not

(58:16):
have to deal with inconsiderate roommates. My cats deserve a
quiet home that doesn't stress them out like this. I
don't want to be forced to socialize every day and
not be able to enjoy alone time. Thankfully, my part
of the rent is really cheap, so I can probably
pay it all upfront if needed, and find a place
of my own. So am I overreacting for wanting to

(58:36):
move out? I think because what we know about and
that is the end of the story. I think, because
what we know about you from this story, I think
you should move out, like you would do better living alone,
which is okay if that's you know, if that's the
best thing for you.

Speaker 3 (58:50):
It's not overreacting to make choices that benefit you and
are what's best for you. Like, yeah, move out, do
your thing.

Speaker 2 (58:58):
If you can afford to move out, and it's not going,
you know, break your least or whatever, move out. You know,
it doesn't Sometimes it doesn't work out. Sometimes they're just
not compatible exactly, Like I feel like there are so
many people who would not be able to live in
this house, not like a By the way, I just
like we throw We have a lot of events, you
guys do. We like to throw parties, and if one
of us didn't, that would kind of wake out exactly

(59:21):
because they are really last minute sometimes, yeah, and we're
all trouble with that. Yeah, So it really just depends on,
you know, what type of people that you're living with. Yeah,
but yeah, that's the end of that story.

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