My boyfriend’s father HATES how I look…so my boyfriend dropped him! - r/charloteedobreyoutube | Reddit Stories | EP2032 - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Sam. This is John, your og Okay
story Time podcast host, and we got.

Speaker 2 (00:04):
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Speaker 3 (00:12):
My boyfriend's father hates how I look, so my boyfriend
dropped him. All of this happened very recently, so the
fallout is still happening. So I, female nineteen, have been
with my boyfriend, male twenty for a year and a
half now. For some context, his parents have been divorced
for almost eleven years and it was a very nasty

(00:33):
split and still hasn't changed to this day. By the way,
this comes from No. One nine thousand on the Okay
Storytime subpured it. So, my boyfriend's mom is covered in tattoos,
has a lot of piercings and dyed hair. My boyfriend's
dad hates tattoos, piercings, and dyed hair and makes his

(00:53):
kids life hellish if they want to be like their mom.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
Why are you?

Speaker 2 (00:57):
Why did they get together that I also have a lot.

Speaker 3 (01:00):
Of piercings and tattoos, and my hair has also dyed
jet black. He doesn't like that very much and always
comments that I'm too much like his ex and always
says to my boyfriend that he's basically jading his mom. Dude,
why are you making it weird? Which is extremely weird
and creepy.

Speaker 1 (01:18):
Exactly, it's so weird.

Speaker 3 (01:19):
I feel he has always had a problem with me
since day one due to me being the things he
hates the most. Yeah, maybe he liked tattoos, but then
when he divorced his wife, he's like, I never want
to see a tattoo. What a damn my life time.

Speaker 2 (01:33):
I see tattoos or dyed hair or piercings of.

Speaker 3 (01:36):
My boyfriend also has a younger brother male sixteen, and
a younger sister, female eleven, who also get a lot
of hate from their dad due to the fact they
also dress goth and want piercings and tattoos like their mom.
Just sounds like a budget of sick people.

Speaker 2 (01:51):
I love it.

Speaker 3 (01:53):
On to the issue that happened. My boyfriend and I
went round to his aunt's house, dad's sister for a
family birthday. Everything was going well, as I feel as
if I was finally able to fit in more with
his dad's family, like I said, his dad always makes
rude and obnoxious comments about me and the way I
dress and look, and my boyfriend has told him multiple

(02:13):
times about how it makes me uncomfortable. Go to the
boyfriend again. Everyone was having a good time until Sarah
boyfriend's sister saw a Pandora ring on my hand and
thought it was an engagement ring and started to get
excited thinking that me and her brother were going to
get married. She's been saying for a long time that
she wants that to happen, so when she thought it
was happening, she started to ask, and when it was

(02:35):
going to happen? They've been married, they've been together for.

Speaker 2 (02:38):
Like a year, and they're also they're very young.

Speaker 3 (02:43):
But also she's like she's eleven, so.

Speaker 2 (02:45):
Okay, yeah, that's cute. I'd be like, oh, that's so sweet.

Speaker 3 (02:48):
Just then Adam, the dad burst in with over my body,
am I gonna let that happen? Why you gotta be
a little stick in the mud?

Speaker 2 (02:58):
Why you gotta be so rude?

Speaker 1 (03:00):
So true?

Speaker 3 (03:01):
I was sick of his comments toward me and said back,
that can be arranged, damn, Mike dropping yam true his
dad honestly not maybe not the best idea, especially when yeah,
in front of everyone, idea.

Speaker 2 (03:17):
I know you're young and you want to be headstrong,
but yes, maybe.

Speaker 3 (03:22):
Which just made things worse. I can imagine the rest
of the day. He was making more and more comments
and insults, saying to my boyfriend, what are you seener
and calling me an idiot when he pulled a plate
of garlic bread away from me, purposely causing it to
fall on the floor and make me look like it
was my fault. Eventually, I got sick of his crap
and called him a wiener to his face and said

(03:43):
I don't like him. Sorry, if there's a lot of swearing,
I'm Scottish and it's just the way we usually talk.
There was a lot of comments fired back and forward.
Most of them were jokes on my side, but his
were just cruel. Luckily, after this happened, Kevin, boyfriend's brother
got stuck in the bathroom, so the attention went to
him and took it off me. There's a lot going
on at this party, not.

Speaker 2 (04:04):
The garlic bread falling to the ground.

Speaker 3 (04:07):
Why'd you do that, you idiot? No, He's like, shut,
I don't like you.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
She's got she's got buttery hands, What are you see
in her?

Speaker 3 (04:14):
Not long after that, boyfriend and I were leaving and
saying goodbye to the family. I was I was stood
talking to s for a while out in the hall
while Ryan boyfriend was getting his things together to go.
He said goodbye to his dad and so did I,
and I got ignored. As we turned to leave, he
made another comment saying that next time I need to
fix my attitude, and I jokingly said k and I

(04:37):
jokingly said back no. Just as Ryan stepped out the door,
his dad called me a rude bee and we left.

Speaker 2 (04:45):
Oh no, that's.

Speaker 3 (04:48):
On the walk back home, Ryan said to me that
what Ryan said to me, that what happened wasn't good.
And then I said that it wasn't right for his
dad to speak to me like that. Ryan didn't actually
hear his dad say that's me and said he would
speak to him once we got home.

Speaker 2 (05:02):
Yeah. I was gonna say, why didn't Ryan do anything?

Speaker 3 (05:04):
Yeah, it seems like maybe maybe the dad was saying.

Speaker 2 (05:07):
It, maybe it was muttered, but yeah, she heard it
in Okay.

Speaker 3 (05:11):
Ryan has never stood up to his dad like he
did before. He only felt confident. He only felt confident
to do it now as he isn't living with him
anymore and we're now living in our own place. There
was a big blow up over text and now Adam
isn't speaking to his son. We had a condition for
his that he could only come back if he apologized
to me, but that's never gonna happen. He already isolated

(05:35):
Kevin as there was multiple blow ups to him in
the past about getting his septum pierced and stretching his ears.
He also always makes awful comments to the fact that
Kevin is now leaving high school to go to college
and study fashion and has been skipping classes in high
school even though he's going to leave in a few months.
Adam is getting very close to losing his relationships with

(05:55):
all of his kids, and Sarah gets treated poorly by
his partner, Joan. She has a son her age and
always gets away with everything and Sarah gets punished. Poor Sarah.
It's cute, little eleven year old. She's also very interested
in goth styles and music, much like her older brothers,
Mom and I. Adam always says that I'm influencing his

(06:15):
kids to disobey him and do what he hates. They're
probably way more influenced by their mother and her brothers.

Speaker 2 (06:22):
I wonder where it's stepping from you. He's been there
for a year, unbelievable.

Speaker 3 (06:27):
I just want them to be happy. Kevin and Sarah
mean a lot to me, and the stuff they go
through with their dad is very similar to me and
my dad. That is why I'm no longer in contact
with him and his family. But that's a different and
long story. But we would love for you to keep
contact with us by joining us live every weekday on
YouTube at three pm PSD. Just tap her profile, easy

(06:48):
tap and there is a little bit more. But what
do you think about Op's clap bags and reaction?

Speaker 2 (06:57):
Oh, he was doing it playfully, like she was trying
to get under like arranged. Yeah, like I'm trying She's
trying to get under the dad's skin. And the dad
it obviously got under his skin and he found it
very rude and he didn't like be playful with it.

Speaker 3 (07:10):
I honestly, I don't think it was the best thing
to call him out in front of everyone. Yeah, I
think it just like it adds fuel to the fire. However,
I don't think you were the a hole necessarily, sure
justified a hole. Because he was attacking you.

Speaker 2 (07:23):
The dad. It seems like you know when someone's shooting
like spitballs. Yeah, you just keep hitting someone and it
finally just like.

Speaker 3 (07:30):
Smack, yeah, smack him.

Speaker 2 (07:32):
Tired of it, tired of it?

Speaker 3 (07:33):
Yeah, But definitely I think ideally you would have gone
to your partner and said like, hey, your dad is
doing this, and he would have taken care of it.
But I mean it seems like after the fact that
is what he's doing. So that's yeah.

Speaker 2 (07:45):
Ryan did call him out and it's like, you know,
what do this? Like we're we're going no contact, and
which is fine. It just sucks for the other kids
in the household.

Speaker 3 (07:55):
It does, especially for the eleven year old who's not
going to you know.

Speaker 2 (07:58):
I would say, if the dad hates everything that you
know the mom has inspired and like they want to do,
why aren't they just with the mom? I know it's
like a fifty probably problems probably, But as an outsider,
I'd be like, Ryan, why don't you talk to your
mom about this and see get pull custody? Yeah, because
that's a very toxic household to be.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
A really Ryan's dad is refusing to speak to him
now and claims that I disrespected him. Ryan is not
backing down and won't get in contact with him now,
As this isn't the first time he's been warned about
making comments about me. He thinks there's no salvaging his
relationship with his dad as he knows it would just
happen again and again no matter what. So am I

(08:39):
the a hole for doing this? And that is the
end of that story. I think the same thoughts.

Speaker 2 (08:46):
I think against some of the words could have been
handled a little bit, yes, more proper, But at the
end of the day, it's done what done, don has
done what is said, and the dad is just really
and he's not gonna apologize.

Speaker 3 (09:02):
I think also, regardless of whatever you said to him,
I think the no contact or even low contact would
have been the right movement.

Speaker 1 (09:08):
Regardless.

Speaker 2 (09:09):
It just seems like there's always going to be an
argument with any of the kids. Yeah, especially it seems
like Ryan and the dad, his dad get into very
big arguments all the time, and it's just not good
for everyone's messles. You know.

Speaker 3 (09:25):
Health agreed, but that is the end of that story.
My fiance and her kids are moving into my house,
but she's accusing me of playing favorites with my daughter.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
Maybe she's the best.

Speaker 1 (09:37):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (09:37):
My forty seven male daughter, Stacy fifteen female, has one
of the two rooms in my house with an on
suite bathroom. It's a largish room with a nice bay window.
Obviously very nice. By the way, this comes from Educational
Meet eighty three fifty nine on the Okay Storytime Separate It.

Speaker 1 (09:54):
So.

Speaker 3 (09:54):
I've recently become engaged to my girlfriend of three years,
Alice thirty three female and land my lord has recently
hiked her rent, so we're planning to have her move
in with me. She has some kids. She has two
daughters thirteen female, ten female, and two sons eleven male
and nine male. She's also pregnant with our daughter doing
about five months. That is going to be a full house.

Speaker 2 (10:16):
It's a big family.

Speaker 3 (10:18):
I've made it absolutely clear to my daughter as a
condition of getting her approval on moving my girlfriend in,
that she's allowed to keep her room and she's allowed
to have a full lock on her door. For what
it's worth, I also got my son's twenty four male
blessing to give away his old room, although that's more
of a moot point as he lives with his girlfriend. Now,

(10:39):
my daughter plans to go to school locally, and I've
told her in no uncertain terms that she's welcome to
live at home for the rest of my life, and
after that she can inherit the house. Wow. I bought
the house with her mother and paid it off in
large part with her mother's life insurance ten years ago,
so it only seems fair. She says, she's all right
as long as she has a room and her bath

(11:00):
room and she's allowed to put a lock on the door.
She has a toaster, oven and a mini fridge in there,
so I guess she's pretty well set up. Stacy will
be giving up a room that she's currently using as
a studio slash project space. She does art, videos and voiceovers, etc.
So even her larger room will become a bit more
cramped and she'll definitely need the extra space. She ass

(11:21):
there will be a bedroom for Alice's girls Stacy's old
project room, and Alice's boys will be getting my son's
old room. I'm going to be putting in a finished
nursery slash bedroom in the basement for.

Speaker 1 (11:31):
Our new daughter.

Speaker 3 (11:33):
Alice thinks this is unfair. She thinks it was wrong
of me to make the decision without her, And she
also thinks that she should move her two daughters into
Stacy's room, and that Stacy should have to move to
the smaller room that they'll be getting. The two of
them already share a smaller room than the one I'm
moving them into as it is, so they're getting an
upgrade regardless. Alice thinks it's not fair for Stacy to

(11:55):
have a bathroom all to herself, and that there won't
be enough bathrooms for us everyone else. She also disapproves
of Stacy's being able to lock everyone out. There were
other smaller things she didn't like that I agreed to
with Stacy, like the fact that she's being paid for
any babysitting. That's totally fair, that is very fair, Or
the fact that my older car, her mom's old car

(12:17):
is hers when she gets her driver's license, will have
her own bathroom in the master bathroom, and the house
has three other bathrooms besides one on each floor, one
near what will be her girl's room, one not far
from what will be the boy's room, and one little
basically be directly next to the new finish room. This
doesn't there's more, but it seems like Opie's being a

(12:40):
good dad and is trying to make this transition you
know fair. Yeah, when you know this is Stacy's room,
It's not fair for her to just have to move out.
She's already sacrificing space that was her studio.

Speaker 1 (12:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (12:52):
The fact that Alice's rent is going up because Alice
is again the girlfriend. Yeah, girlfriend or like yet, partner,
let's just say a partner. Yeah, Alice is the partner,
and she wants more.

Speaker 3 (13:05):
It just seemed Yeah, she just wants more for all
her kids and for herself.

Speaker 2 (13:09):
Do you realize that he's letting you into yeah, his
house and allowing you to all move in and also
give more space for one your kids, Yeah, and your
coming kid.

Speaker 3 (13:21):
I told Alice that my deal with Stacy's non negotiable,
set in stone, and that it's literally a condition of
her even moving in. Alice is upset that Stacy and
I both have spaces completely dedicated to ourselves. I have
my office, which I need because I work from home
and have projects besides, and there aren't a whole lot
of other spaces to put people. I told her she
can pretty much do what she wants in the living room.

(13:43):
But that it is what it is, and there's pretty
much nothing to be done about it. A bigger house
is not an option unless Alice is going to start
making a heck of a lot more money and buy
her own bigger house. It's already a pretty big house,
and housing is expensive. I told her that she's already
getting a break by my own only expecting her to
contribute fifteen or twenty percent to household bills. If we

(14:04):
were doing it proportionately, it would be more like twenty
five to thirty percent. We keep separate finances, and we've
agreed to a prenup. Alice just seems upset that I
won't change the setup, even though there's no real way
to change it, and she's accused me of treating Stacy
like a spoiled little princess and letting her be queen
of the house.

Speaker 2 (14:23):
I'm sorry, who are you to like?

Speaker 3 (14:26):
This is so disrespectful? Yeah, you don't you agree with this?
You don't have to move in, You can stay unmoved in.

Speaker 2 (14:33):
You can go get your own place.

Speaker 3 (14:34):
Like I do, think that there are compromises that need
to be made whenever you're you know, combining families and stuff. Yes,
but also, you can't expect this, you know, I don't
know she's like a teenager to just have to give
up her room.

Speaker 2 (14:45):
I don't think that's Stacy. This is one Stacy is
his daughter. Yeah, and she this was probably a conversation
they both had and he did say this was the deal.

Speaker 3 (14:53):
Also a house that was paid for partially by her
mother's life insurance.

Speaker 2 (14:57):
Yeah, no, you she gets right now. Shouldn't honestly keep
her mouth shut. I see that. You should be happy
enough that you're getting a place and a roof for everyone.

Speaker 3 (15:08):
I've been very cheap. Yeah, I just think I think
I am of the mind of both. There are compromises
that need to be made when you're come outing families.
But also this is this is a not you know,
it's not fair for her to ask Stacy.

Speaker 2 (15:23):
Again, you haven't Alice has not moved in yet. You
don't even know how it's going to be. It could
be perfect, it may not, who knows. But this is
way too early. Be like, no, that's not gonna work.

Speaker 3 (15:33):
Frankly, my daughter comes first. She lived here all her life,
and I already know it's going to be a big
adjustment having all of those other kids move in. As
much as I love Alice and as much as I
want a relationship to work, if it's a matter of
choosing between the two of them, then my relationship with
Alice is a sacrifice I'm willing to make. I've told
her that if she comes into this with wicked stepmother vibes,

(15:54):
and that will be the end of things. She thinks
I'm being unreasonable? Am I the a whole? I don't
think so.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
No. The fact that again that you agreed with your
daughter and your daughter agreed with you. Great, Yeah, that's
like sometimes the daughter like, no, that's my Yeah, that's
my art studio.

Speaker 3 (16:15):
That's true. What do you want the situation? I was
thinking that you would keep your own room. And then
he goes back to Alice and it's like, hey, I've
talked to my daughter. I think that's the situation. Is
that does that work for you? Because if it doesn't,
then maybe we should stay apart, like live apart for now.
And like had that kind of conversation just so it
wasn't kind of as last minute as it seems.

Speaker 1 (16:34):
It was.

Speaker 2 (16:34):
Yeah, but it seems, but I still think it's a
fair you know, it was so extremely fair I think everything.
I like, he said the rent went up and he's like, oh,
this is very last minute, you can move in. But
these are the guidelines and these are the rules.

Speaker 3 (16:48):
Yes, so she still has the right to say no.

Speaker 2 (16:51):
You could say no. But the fact that he said, oh,
you're not paying as much, You're paying a little bit,
and everyone gets a roof over their heads. Yeah, I
don't know where she's coming from to be like, or
where she gets there, like her.

Speaker 3 (17:02):
Being like, oh, she's a spoiled little princess.

Speaker 2 (17:04):
Like who are you to say that anything?

Speaker 3 (17:07):
Yeah, but there's an update. Yes, I got a lot
of eye opening, insight and advice from my post, so
I feel it's worth giving everyone an update, especially considering developments. First,
to address a few questions that seem to keep coming up.
Before I lost the ability to read and every reply
and respond to every reply, although I'm still trying. My son,
twenty four mail is my child from a previous relationship

(17:30):
before I met sash Mary, my late wife. He has
his own provisions in my will, but he's quite aware
that the house goes to his sister. My own sister
is to become guardian of my daughter if anything should
happen to me. I love my sister as dearly as
I love anyone, and she and her niece love each
other and get along great. I trust her completely if
God forbid anything should happen. Okay, yes, the basement is

(17:53):
an unusual place for a nursery, but I was just
trying to make people fit where they could go. The
move was supposed to be happening within a month, and
Alice's older kids needed rooms. Now. Meanwhile, the baby isn't
going to be born for about five months, so she
could go into the room that isn't made yet. Yes,
I honestly figured we could keep a crib in our
room for a bit and after that it's no big

(18:15):
deal for a kid to have her room in a
finish basement. So yeah, so even then, like, this is
not the final deal. A kid's gotta have a bigger room.

Speaker 2 (18:22):
This is just temporary. And again, Stacy's his daughter, she's
already a teenager.

Speaker 3 (18:27):
Also, she's like, yeah, she's the oldest one.

Speaker 2 (18:29):
She was sixteen or thirteen.

Speaker 3 (18:31):
Or something like that. I think she was a teenager
and the other kids were younger.

Speaker 2 (18:34):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (18:34):
Yeah, So also, honestly, I didn't want to move my office.
It's been where it is forever, and I didn't want
to move it. I can admit that we've had the
beginning slash groundwork of a finished basement since forever, but
there was never any reason to really put a move
on it. It was a big change to go from
having more room than we need with just me and
Stacy rattling around in the house, just suddenly scrambling for space,

(18:55):
and to not having enough. It was the obvious spot
where an additional bedroom could go, but not a spot
where a bedroom is now. Alice and I had talked
about marriage and children more or less in the abstract
on many occasions, and we both wanted to get married
at some point if things continued to work out, and
I wanted to have more children. Although this pregnancy was

(19:16):
quite unexpected. It was Alice's pregnancy combined with the rent
hike on her place, that accelerated the timetable on things right,
so they probably would have had more conversations about this.

Speaker 2 (19:27):
It was just again, like I said, it was probably
all the spur of the moment and the fact that
he is like even in the spur of the moment,
it's like I can do this, we can do this. Yeah,
and she still wants more.

Speaker 3 (19:37):
Yeah, for what it's worth. The rent hike is real.
I've seen the paperwork, and I have literally no reason
to suspect the baby is not mine. But yes, the
only reason why we got engaged so recently is because
Alice got pregnant. The only reason why Alice and her
kids would be moving in with me so suddenly is
because she was likely to need to move somewhere, and
I'd obviously like to be responsible for Slash Beanier. Slash

(19:59):
rais my coming daughter. To me, it made sense for
my daughter to live with me. I never wanted to
be an absentee parent slash part time parent, or to
not have time or spare or share space with my child.
The circumstances all made sense, at least until now. I
was definitely wary of Alice and paying more attention to her,

(20:20):
especially after the many many comments that I read. I
came to Reddit to get a sanity check on whether
or not I was being an a hole about my
conditions with Stacy, not to try to actually make any
kind of major life or relationship changes, but I didn't
want to turn a blind eye either. It was Friday
and Stacy texted me asking for her allowance. I was
with Alice at the time, and I went ahead and

(20:41):
let the subject come up. I give Stacy one hundred
dollars a week. Alice thinks this is crazy and excessive.
She thinks is improper, and she brought it up as
an example of how she thinks I'm raising Stacy like
a spoiled princess. If it's not your child. And also,
you haven't been living there lot long, I don't think
you really get a say in how to parent his kid.

Speaker 2 (21:03):
Couple, Yeah, a couple things. It's not your daughter, it's
not your parenting style, and it's his money. It's not
your money, it's not our money. It's his money, and
he's giving it to her. Yeah, and can do whatever
he wants. Yeah, that's really You're sick. She's trying to
input herself in here. Maybe even op is not understanding
the circumstances of everything.

Speaker 1 (21:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (21:22):
She said as much again when I told her I
was sending Stacy her allowance, But this time Alice also
asked if her kids would get the same allowance. After
we got married. I told her that someday our new
daughter would probably get an allowance just like Stacey does,
but there was no way I had any plans of
shelling out an extra four hundred dollars a week for
her other kids. Alice got upset. She said that Stacy

(21:44):
wastes my money on shoes and makeup. She has previously
criticized Stacy for wearing fancy sneakers, high heels, and makeup.
And she said that I was showing favoritism and that's
a form of abuse. Do you complain about me letting
Stacy buy things with my credit card and store my
credit card on her phone when I don't even let
Alice do that. She said that whatever money was going
to go to the kids should be split evenly amongst them.

(22:07):
I have somewhat mixed feelings about this, I think, because
I think that when you combine families, there should be
an effort to make those kids your kids.

Speaker 2 (22:16):
Their favoritism. Obviously it's your Yeah, your kids.

Speaker 3 (22:19):
There's going to be a different relationship between your daughter.

Speaker 2 (22:22):
From the very kids. Yes, you guys just moved in,
and you guys, I feel like their dating time table
hasn't been that that.

Speaker 3 (22:29):
I don't think so. No shrugged and told her that
wasn't going to happen, and that I wasn't going to
cut Stacy's allowance. She snapped at me and said that
a man living alone with his daughter and doting on
her like I do is creepy and incestuous.

Speaker 2 (22:43):
Done. Okay, freak, you're no longer coming.

Speaker 3 (22:47):
Like, I take back anything that I was trying to
help out Alice with.

Speaker 2 (22:52):
Do you insane the fact that she is calling out
Op like that, and like, do you realize that you
are going into his house so he's offering he's.

Speaker 3 (23:01):
Offering you a place in his house to help you know,
how's your kids? And you're calling his relationship with his
daughter creepy.

Speaker 2 (23:09):
The one who's being a spoiled rat here is you?
I mean, not Op but Alice? Yeah, look at yeah,
let's go.

Speaker 3 (23:18):
And she said, you've just replaced your wife with your
daughter and you need.

Speaker 1 (23:21):
To stop again.

Speaker 2 (23:22):
Who are you a single.

Speaker 3 (23:24):
Contract ren hike, Go go deal with it. You're not
moving in.

Speaker 2 (23:26):
Good luck, have good luck with you and your kids.
I'll be there for our kid, but like not for.

Speaker 3 (23:33):
You, Yeah, not for you. That was it. Sure, I've
ignored a lot of red flags up until now, but
that was it.

Speaker 2 (23:41):
Yep.

Speaker 3 (23:42):
She started trying to tell me about how it's unhealthy
for me to be so close with Stacy, and now
she didn't want her kids to be neglected, and how
she wanted to be treated as an equal if we
were getting married. But I interrupted her, and I told
her that I don't think we should be getting married.
I told her that I don't want her moving in
and that we were going to need to work something
else out. To be perfectly honest, my sister, my brother,

(24:03):
and some of my friends have expressed some of the
same misgivings about Alice that I've read, although they were
generally a lot more gentle about it. I means read it.
I was in love with her. In fact, I'm still
in love with her, and I wasn't seeing things clearly.
I told her that I would always and definitely make
sure that our child had a roof over her head,
but that she was going to have to work something

(24:24):
out for herself and her kids on her own. Obviously,
we had a huge fight. She screamed at me. She
called me a heartless bee. She blamed Stacy for trying
to sabotage our relationship. She guilt tripped me about her
cost of living and how I'm in an empty house
all by myself. She also guilt tripped me about the
stress on the baby, and I actually do feel bad

(24:47):
and worry about that. She eventually broke down crying and
told me to leave. In the past ten years, this
was the first relationship with a woman I've had that
became serious. I love her and this hurts. It hurts
a heck of a lot. I told Stacy that she
didn't have to bother moving her stuff out about the room,
that Alice wasn't coming, and we hugged. She asked if

(25:09):
this was her fault, and I told her no. I
told her, I honestly feel like marrying Alice would have
been a mistake, even if the two of them could
have been best buddies. By the way, you can be
best buddies with us every WEEKDA at three PMPSD. Just
tap our profile. Tap it and there is a little
bit more to the story. But do you have any
final thoughts?

Speaker 2 (25:27):
Good on op realizing this is such a heart like
rocking a hard place for him, because again he even
just stated it. I was saying, how long how has
he been dating? This is the first serious relationship he's
had over ten years since the passing of his wife.

Speaker 3 (25:40):
And he's like, Alice is pregnant with his kid. Yes,
this is a complicated situation, but this.

Speaker 2 (25:47):
Is showing Alice's true colors. You can't like, I get it.
She's like, I don't like, you shouldn't be showing favoritism,
like this is my daughter. Yeah, I've only known you
for so long, this is my daughter. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (26:00):
No, it's just yeah, I think she would just keep
taking more and more. Yeah, and she'd keep complaining and
then trying to push you away from Stacy, which is
not fair.

Speaker 2 (26:09):
Yeah. The fact that she said all those nasty things.

Speaker 3 (26:13):
Terrible terrible, disgusting.

Speaker 2 (26:14):
Things, and again, who is she to call you out?
And who is she to say your parentings? You know,
do this, do that. It's like.

Speaker 3 (26:23):
You guys are allowed to talk about you know, well,
I do think as like stepparents, I think you should
have a conversation about what your role as a parent
is going to be for your step kids. Yes, because
it is important to have that discussion. But you can't
just assume that you get to, you know, right off
the bat, get to tell their kids how, you know,

(26:44):
how they're going to live and be and stuff in.

Speaker 2 (26:46):
Act and to also just say, even if Alice did
move in with the kids, she already had a mindset
towards Stacy.

Speaker 3 (26:53):
Yes, she already had that.

Speaker 2 (26:54):
She already had that. That's already a very bad sign
that she doesn't want to be she like try to
change the dynamic or get in the way. So she
already has a bad mindset about Stacy. Not good, not good.

Speaker 3 (27:09):
But I think I think you did the right thing.
But there is a little bit left. I've always wanted
to have a few more kids, and I've missed having
a wife, but things don't always happen the way we want.
So I'm pretty sure my relationship with Alice is effectively over,
even if we're going to be raising a child together
for the foreseeable future. My new daughter can have my

(27:29):
son's old room whenever we work out whatever custody agreement
we end up working out.

Speaker 2 (27:33):
There you go, I'm.

Speaker 3 (27:34):
Not sorry to be having another kid, even if I
really wish the circumstances could have been better. The red
flags were always there. I guess it's better that I
noticed them now instead of later. And that is the
end of that story. I agree you did eventually notice
the red flags it.

Speaker 2 (27:52):
Sometimes you're blinded by love, and especially this kind of
thing where he has a kid series relationship. Yeah it sucks,
but good on you. Good on you for standing your ground.
And again the entire time, am I like, who is
this woman who thinks she can just, yeah, walk all
over you and act like everything is hers it's yours. No, no, no,

(28:13):
you don't have to do.

Speaker 3 (28:13):
That, absolutely not. But that is the end of that story.
So we'll see you next time. My sister in law
black listed my wedding dates.

Speaker 4 (28:23):
Now she's lying to get her away by any means possible.

Speaker 1 (28:27):
Context to start, I twenty seven female, met my now fiance,
twenty six male when we were nineteen. We started dating
and I ended up becoming really close with his family.
My family is slash was abusive, so I spent a
lot of time at my then boyfriend's house. His parents
more or less adopted me. His dad taught me how
to do a lot of house maintenance stuff like fixing
the washer, and his mom would come with me to

(28:49):
doctor's appointments and stuff. Lovely, we love a doctor mom.
By the way, this comes from user Repulsive Pepper nine
five seven on the r slash Okay story time subreddit.
I'm chronically ill with a rare disorder, amongst other things,
and his mom would come to my appointments for support,
come with me to any tests I needed done, the
whole nine yards truly wonderful people. Anyway. Fiance has a sister, Anne,

(29:13):
twenty eight female who was twenty at this point in
the story. She was away at college when we started dating,
so I really didn't get to know her for about
a year into our relationship. She ended up doing her
last few semesters from home, so we did end up bonding.
We had similar interests and we're close in age, and
since we were both home often, we ended up doing
sisterly things like getting our nails done, going shopping, getting

(29:35):
ice cream, et cetera. We actually had each other saved
as sister last name in our phones, just to paint
the picture of how far off the rails we've gotten.
After Anne moved home, she started showing signs of jealousy
towards me.

Speaker 4 (29:50):
Interesting.

Speaker 1 (29:51):
Oh. I tried to brush it off, and while my
fiance wasn't happy about it, he didn't say anything to
her because he knew it was more drama than it
was worth. She started signing any cards we got their
parents as quote from your real daughter. I just signed
my name. I wasn't claiming to be their daughter. And
she would get nasty when her kitten, who she got
despite working eighty hours a week, liked me, who was

(30:14):
always home with her. I mean, it's just a given. Yeah,
the cat's gonna like if you're at home with the
cat all the.

Speaker 4 (30:19):
Time, whoever's giving the cat more treats is gonna like
it exactly.

Speaker 1 (30:23):
Fast forward a couple of years and moves out, buys
a house, and I move in with my fiance and
his parents, which wasn't planned, but it was no longer
safe in my current living situation. I appreciate them greatly
allowing me to live with them even now. Anyways, my
fiance and I used this time to look for slash
save money for a house. He proposed after five this
years together, but says he doesn't want to get married

(30:45):
until we have our own house, which is fair. He
doesn't want to be married and still living with his parents.

Speaker 4 (30:50):
Gotcha, it does make.

Speaker 1 (30:51):
A little bit of sense. We've been looking for a
house for almost two years. Wow, that's a long time,
and at this point we're tired of waiting to get married.
After we got engaged, we had the whole wedding planned out,
the venue, caterer, dress, colors, all of it. We just
never booked because we weren't sure when we'd be in
a position to get married. That being said, it's now
been two years and we decided a few months ago

(31:13):
to stop putting our life on hold while waiting for
a house. We got back into wedding planning, and in
that time Anne got engaged.

Speaker 4 (31:20):
Oh wow, congratulations. Yeah, I'm sure nothing bad will come
of this. No, no, No one's gonna like make this
a competition.

Speaker 1 (31:30):
Yeah, I'm sure everything's gonna be very just copasetic among
all parties in this conversation in the story for reference
and is very social, bubbly life of the party, where
my fiance and I are not. Her proposal required everyone
to drive over an hour away to the middle of
the forest, including her fiance's elderly grandparents and family who

(31:52):
had to drive three plus hours, as well as friends
who have two kids under the age of two. Overall,
her propose was a thirty plus person event. This was
already an indicator to my fiance and I that things
were gonna get bad, and and her fiance decide on
a destination wedding that will be in the beginning of
August twenty twenty five, as well as a second local

(32:13):
wedding in the beginning of October twenty five. How are
you gonna give yourself two weddings?

Speaker 4 (32:19):
I'm for the just do one.

Speaker 1 (32:21):
My fiance and I started dating and got engaged on
a twentieth, so we wanted to get married on a
twenty as well. That being said, that only leaves like
five dates in the year that are both a twenty
and fall on a weekend. I know this problem would
be resolved if we didn't do a twenty, but just
humor me for the time being. One of these dates
happens to be July twentieth, which is also our eighth

(32:44):
year anniversary. What we reach out to Anne and say, hey,
we'd like to do this date because it's significant to us,
but we understand if it's too close, we do have
other options, but we wanted to ask if it was okay.
We were fully expecting her to say know, which was fair,
as our weddings would be like three weeks apart.

Speaker 4 (33:03):
To our surprise, she says yes, it's fine. Yay, Oh wow, nice.

Speaker 1 (33:08):
Sure nothing bad can happen from here.

Speaker 4 (33:10):
Nope, everything's good.

Speaker 1 (33:11):
Now, everything's great and that's the end of the story.
And oh they had three weddings and it was all perfect.
Oh wow, oh wait, there seems to be more. Then
Anne calls her mom crying about how could we do
this to her, that we were selfish, etcetera, etcetera, which
is absurd because we also offered other dates. She didn't

(33:32):
have to say yes. My future mother in law basically
calls my fiance and I out for being a holes
for planning so close to her. For the record, Anne
was going to let us think that the date was
fine and be mad about it forever, but her mom
said something so we caught wind of it. That's crazy,
that's crazy.

Speaker 4 (33:52):
This is insane.

Speaker 1 (33:52):
That's fully unhinged behavior to be like, hey, is this
date okay with you? Will literally change it for you
if it's not, even though it's super important to us.
We will put that aside because you've already planned your wedding. Yeah,
She's like, no, no, no, it's fine, And she was
secretly gonna be like these monsters, they stole my wedding.

(34:15):
From me, I'll never recover. Come on. We texted Anne
and apologized, basically explaining, hey, we also have these other dates.
Like we told you, we don't mind doing a different date,
but in the future, please tell us if there's a
problem instead of just holding it in. She apologizes for
being kind of mean, but then says we can't get

(34:38):
married one month before or after either of her weddings.
There are only four dates that we could choose from,
and she has essentially blacklisted three of them.

Speaker 4 (34:47):
Oh well, then just susan fourth.

Speaker 1 (34:49):
We understand not getting married before her, but after anyway,
we go to mother in law like she gets to
control an entire half of the year. Hello, and mother
in law backs her up and again says, regardless of
when we get married, that we're too close to Anne's
wedding and in the wrong.

Speaker 4 (35:10):
What man before or.

Speaker 1 (35:13):
After is crazy? The Internet is divided because not only
is Anne having two weddings, with one being a destination wedding,
we don't need to get married three weeks before her. Again,
we know that, which is why we offered other dates
as well. We didn't go to Anne like we booked
this date get aft. We consulted her for the sole

(35:33):
purpose of keeping this from happening. We reach out to
Anne again just to touch base on we can't even
get married a month after, and Anne apologizes, saying that
she was just being jealous and reacted instead of thinking.
She then tells us the date in July, three weeks
before her first wedding, is fine, so long as it's

(35:53):
fine with their parents. Okay. We figured Anne was using
this just as a way to have her parents say
no for her, but boy, were we wrong. Instead, Anne
told her parents that she stood her ground and told
us absolutely no getting married a month before or after
her weddings. What a psycho.

Speaker 4 (36:15):
I don't know. I kind of see it in a way.

Speaker 1 (36:17):
What do you mean you see it?

Speaker 4 (36:19):
I understand.

Speaker 1 (36:19):
And she's lying to them.

Speaker 4 (36:21):
Oh that she's lying. Oh no, no, no, no, no no,
I see getting.

Speaker 1 (36:26):
Married upfront about it? Yeah? Sure whatever. Oh, but she
she was. She literally told them, oh, it's fine, you
can do the first date. And then she went and
told her parents. She's like, She's like, you can do
the first date as long as our parents are okay
with it. God. And then she went to her parents
and went, I stood my ground and I told them
no way are they going to have a wedding in July.

(36:47):
So she's like purposefully trying to like just make their
lives miserable.

Speaker 4 (36:51):
Now she's trying to make trying to make he look
bad because she's been Joseph her all these years. This
is her way. This is a way to make it
look bad. This is crazy.

Speaker 1 (37:00):
Bit she didn't we have text proof of that. Anyhow,
We go to mother in law like we're going with
the date we originally picked. We talked to Anne and
she said it was fine, and mother in law went
off again about us being rude, selfish, and purposely ignoring
Anne's wishes for upstaging Anne. We showed her the text

(37:23):
that is very clearly Anne saying that date is fine,
and mother in law said, we must have misunderstood. Wow,
a classic don't believe your lying eyes. As far as
we can figure, Anne lied to her mom to trick
us into picking a date that would get us yelled
at again. This all could have been solved if she

(37:43):
just said no to our original date instead of pinning
us in a position where no matter what we do,
we're wrong. But you know what, you'll never be wrong
for joining us live on YouTube every weekday at three
pm PSD. Just tap our profile bonus and through a
temper tantrum the other day because I asked her dad
to walk me down the aisle since I'm essentially an

(38:05):
orphan and he's been more of a dad to me
than my actual dad. Anne lost her crap about how
she should get to experience that first, and how it's
not fair that he's gonna walk me down when I'm
not his real daughter, and that's a sacred thing that
he should get to share with her and only her,
as he's their only daughter. It was one thing when
it was just a conflict about the date, but since

(38:27):
then Anne has become so much more combative and dramatic.
All of our friends support us, but his family, especially
his parents, seem to side with his sister more. If
she asked us to do a different date, that would
have been one thing, but to then tell lies and
make drama out of every decision we make, Like, seriously, yeah, that's.

Speaker 4 (38:48):
A pretty odd that's pretty wild.

Speaker 1 (38:50):
That's a pretty gross, lame, stinky little move of you.
I feel like we're both in the wrong here, but
I don't know how to even move forward at this point. Hey, well,
what good news is. I don't think you're both in
the wrong. No, I think there's clearly one side that
is much more wronger than the other. That's right, and
it would be your sister in law. Maybe just do
the coolest thing, though, which is elope, just you and

(39:11):
your husband get married.

Speaker 4 (39:12):
I think that's fair to them. I understand they want
to get married, but I don't think it's fair of them.
They're probably already living together, so it doesn't really matter
if they get eloped.

Speaker 1 (39:18):
But on a real level, just don't if your family's
being super problematic and like making your life miserable, trying
to get them involved in this, just just to exclude them.

Speaker 4 (39:28):
Yeah, but that is the end of that story.

Speaker 1 (39:31):
Hey, it's say, I'm your og host here, bring it
back to the stories.

Speaker 2 (39:33):
But here's three minutes bads from our sponsor. My family
is trying to manipulate my financial help, so I told
them I'm selling the house.

Speaker 1 (39:42):
Tell it my house.

Speaker 2 (39:43):
Apologies for any grammatical errors, as English is not my
first language. I twenty five female, am on the brink
of stopping to cover for my family's home expenses and
to sell the house if they cannot provide for their
shares financially. By the way, this comes from Miserable p.
One two three on the r slash Okay storytime severed
it cute name for context. I'm the oldest daughter who

(40:05):
was raised by my grandparents and was taught at a
young age on how to manage money wisely and to
stick to the reality meeting living within our own means.
My sister, twenty three female, was raised by our dad
while our mom was working out of the country and
eventually her bringing us to the country she worked in
when I sorry, when I was seventeen years old. I

(40:25):
started working part time while in school at eighteen years old,
and also paid for my college tuition with the money
from my job. I never stopped working since I started,
so my parents won't have to think about me financially.
After college, I started to work full time at a
new job. My parents and I decided to buy a
house a few years ago when I finally had good
income and credit score. While house shopping, my mom wanted

(40:47):
to buy a nine hundred K worth of house, saying
niger K worth of house. Maybe it's like a I
don't know, maybe the different monetary value. Oh yeah, that's
like nine hundred thousand worth of house, Mom saying, oh, yeah,
we can easily afford the monthly mortgage payments even just
with my income. I told her it was best to
get a house less than six hundred K, and thankfully

(41:09):
she liked a house listed for five hundred.

Speaker 3 (41:11):
Okay, okay, we're cool, everything's fine.

Speaker 2 (41:12):
Okay. We won the bid for a little over six
hundred k. Bidding was crazy and we lost every time.
We bid ninety k over asking price. So we bid
a little more than our target price. We put a
twenty percent down payment. Payments were low around this time
because we were going for a variable rate, although I
know that if the rate gets a little higher, we
are doomed. So I was feeling hesitant with the purchase price.

(41:34):
She was happy with the house before, and I didn't
want her choosing a bigger, more expensive one if we
don't win, so I agreed to a bid to bid
a little more.

Speaker 3 (41:44):
Well, yeah, I think sometimes just buying a house, you
got a bid a little bit more than you know,
what they originally ask.

Speaker 2 (41:50):
You always gotta do that. Yeah, not too much, but yeah,
usually after COVID rates skyrocketed and her boastful statement before
is now like a loop playing on in my head.
It ticks me off every time I remember it. But
I agreed to purchase too, so I don't have a
choice now but to face our financial challenge. I have

(42:10):
the responsibility of covering most of our household expenses due
to my sister not wanting to get a job or
pursue her studies. She worked once for almost a year,
and my parents have a lower income than me with
a high debt. Thank god I got promoted after we
purchased the house. This is not good.

Speaker 3 (42:28):
It's not great.

Speaker 1 (42:28):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (42:29):
And when you get a house and now you can't
pay for it.

Speaker 2 (42:31):
No, and everyone's cooped in together. I was gonna say,
if op was taking care of herself, she just should
have just stayed taken care of herself.

Speaker 4 (42:39):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (42:40):
This resulted in them not able to pay the bills
on time, despite of me giving my share on time
and our bank almost having a legal action on our house.
I fixed the issues as soon as I saw the
letter from the bank. She did not tell me that
the bank wasn't able to get enough money for the
mortgage because the pre authorized payment for her credit card
was taking the money. I told my parents that I

(43:01):
will now manage the bills so we won't have these
issues again, and transferred to all of the PAP related
to the house to my own account. There's a lot
of responsibility for a lot eighteen they moved there, but
I think she's let's say twenties.

Speaker 3 (43:15):
She's probably in her twenties, but yeah, a lot of
responsibility being put on her by her parents and her sister.

Speaker 2 (43:20):
I also took the financial responsibility of paying the utilities, insurance,
and other home expenses alone, despite of me not living
with them for almost a year now, so that they
won't have to pay an amount they can't afford. The
only amount that they have to give me as their
share is the mortgage and property taxes. We still split
it in three, hoping it would help them pay their

(43:41):
personal debts. It just seems like your parents aren't financially.

Speaker 3 (43:45):
It doesn't seem like, yeah, well, when that was the
beginning of this story, it was like.

Speaker 2 (43:50):
And you kind of knew that, Yeah, I think you
knew op that what you're getting yourself into. Especially when
your mom was like, let's go for the nine hundred
K house.

Speaker 3 (43:56):
You're like, ah, really, we can't pay for that.

Speaker 2 (44:01):
My parents weren't like this before. They also had savings,
but they started working for one job compared to having
two jobs before, resulting in them earning less income, consuming
their savings and borrowing more. They are getting old, so
I agreed to them working less. That is why I
decided to take most of the financial responsibilities. But I

(44:21):
did not expect them to borrow so aggressively for them
to reach this point where I'm now beginning to shoulder
everything financially.

Speaker 1 (44:28):
Oh, this is.

Speaker 3 (44:29):
Really to help your parents out as they keep borrowing
and you're like, please, top, I have to pay for
all of.

Speaker 2 (44:38):
This, yes, and what is your sister doing nothing?

Speaker 3 (44:42):
Nada.

Speaker 2 (44:43):
As a young immigrant, I wanted to have a better
future here like our mom wanted to, so I started
saving up to upgrade my education. I am lucky enough
to be promoted before at my current job, but after
applying for an internal job posting in the company, which
is a higher position where I am now, the management
said that if I want to step into a higher position,
it is best to have a better academic credential and

(45:05):
to grow a little more, which is the reason now
for getting a better education as my current goal, aside
from my savings and little investments. I still make sure
to have extra money on my other account to cover
my parents' share, in which in this case they cannot
meet the amount we agreed on, which was often again
they're just not financially responsible, or they just they shoot

(45:28):
over the moon. Yeah, I may not be able to
eat out or buy things that I want for myself,
but at least I am capable to pay for heat
and shelter while having the luxury of being able to
save save up little by little for courses that I
want to take soon. I do not have a huge income,
maybe just doing a good job in managing my finances,

(45:48):
but I always imagine how it would have been so
much easier for me financially if we still split the
expenses equally. The pressure on my career growth, having a
future where I can live comfortably along with my face
family responsibilities has been affecting me mentally for years.

Speaker 3 (46:03):
I can imagine there's a lot. Yeah, as you said,
there's a lot of responsibility on you, and I think
more conversations need to be had with your parents and
your family about how much pressure they're putting on you.

Speaker 2 (46:14):
I think, I mean, we kind of already have an
idea what's going on here, but it's time to minimize
and like your parents aren't working as much, your sister's
not working. You're paying for everything. You got to make
the house, you got to take away the house. Yeah,
you got to go smaller.

Speaker 3 (46:30):
Yeah. I think you just say yeah, say like, hey, guys,
we can't afford this based off of like how much
you guys are working. We just can't afford it.

Speaker 2 (46:36):
It's not it's yeah. My partner whom I am living
with now, has been trying to convince me since last
year to have a short vacation in a sunny country
to have a break, but I rejected the idea before
due to my fear of being short on money. I
hope you can't even get a break, can't.

Speaker 3 (46:53):
Even get a break.

Speaker 2 (46:55):
This year, having enough money for a trip and really
wanted to break from my family and work, I agreed
on going for a short vacation to just relax a bit. Good.
When I called and told my mom I was going
for a short vacation, she became upset and said that
I always state how I cannot take them on a trip,
but I can go when it's with my partner.

Speaker 3 (47:13):
Because oh, Pea's paying for everything. Oh Pi's the one
paying for it all. So yes, they can use their
own money to go on a trip. If you want
to go on a trip, then you need to get
some money.

Speaker 2 (47:24):
It's your money, so literally your money.

Speaker 3 (47:26):
Don't let them say, oh, why can't you take us,
because it's.

Speaker 1 (47:29):
Not their money.

Speaker 2 (47:30):
Also, I'm like, do you realize you have a roof
over your head because of me?

Speaker 3 (47:34):
Do you understand how much I'm paying for you because
it seems like you don't.

Speaker 2 (47:38):
I told her that I still can't afford to bring
them on a trip, and I can only afford this
because my partner and I will be splitting the expenses.
I also tried to console her by telling her that
I will bring them on a trip next time, just
not out of the country. She was still, of course, upset,
and told me just go and be happy. I guess
I'll just I'm alive here without you bringing me on

(47:59):
a trip.

Speaker 3 (48:00):
Oh now she's guilt tripping, girl. Stop stop being nasty,
like you don't get it. Go on a trip if
you want to pay.

Speaker 2 (48:08):
For it, fine, but you can't even pay for the house.

Speaker 3 (48:12):
I don't not like this, mutter.

Speaker 2 (48:14):
I became upset and annoyed. I told her that we
go on trips every year on her birthday whenever we can.
This is always her birthday wish, just not this year
because they cannot afford it and I cannot cover all
the trip expenses for four people alone. She hung up
the call after that. It was not the first time
she guilted me into doing something, but I purposely told

(48:35):
her the day before we leave, so she and I
won't have the chance to change anything, since I know
that if I told her a month before, I will
be forced to bring her along, even out of guilt
that I can't afford it. I still enjoyed our trip
despite of me thinking about the conversation in my mind,
and I tried to make her happy by getting them
souvenirs from the trip. She probably threw them away. Days

(48:57):
after this, she still called me and talked to me
like nothing happened. Okay, I guess she liked my peace offering.
Although I'm still upset with her, as I felt unappreciated
all these years while she always guilted me just so
I would do what she wants. Hmmm, I feel like
I will have the last straw soon as I am
planning to go back to our home country alone to
grant my grandma's wish to spend time with me after

(49:19):
not coming back since we migrated. My mom wanted to
come too, along with my sister and my dad, saying
that I can pay for their plane ticket will be
around eight to nine grand for all four of us.

Speaker 3 (49:30):
No, No, you won't pay for the plane ticket.

Speaker 2 (49:33):
I don't understand why they think you are just infinite
amounts of money.

Speaker 3 (49:37):
Yeah, they're like, oh pie Scott, dope, he pays for
the house. She might. They must have money, they must
be rolling in.

Speaker 2 (49:43):
No, and they will make it up to me by
paying me four hundred dollars a month in installments, to
which I know they will not meet due to their
current financial situation and them not paying me back on
our pass trips before.

Speaker 3 (49:54):
They can't even afford to help with the house. There's
no way they would help you with this trip.

Speaker 2 (49:58):
Yeah. I want to say no, but I am one
hundred percent sure. She will tell me again how she
sacrifices a lot to bring us in a country with
better opportunities and for us to have a better future,
while I can't sacrifice anything for her.

Speaker 3 (50:11):
You are sad, like I know, I mean, she probably
will say.

Speaker 2 (50:14):
This, this is this is again. I'm this is stressing
me out because like do you, I don't. Again, you
don't feel appreciated, and they keep just wanting more and
more and more and more. Yeah, and it's like you
just keep feeding and feeding and they just like no,
keep coming, keep it coming.

Speaker 3 (50:31):
Yeah, we know. I think I think she'll probably say that,
and I think you just have to know that you
are doing a lot for her and maybe bring and
be like Mom, I would love to take you on
a trip, but I can't afford it, and I need
this break because I've been paying for everything right now.

Speaker 2 (50:47):
I'm like mom, And if she's you know, she could.

Speaker 3 (50:48):
Say whatever she wants, but I can pay for it, and.

Speaker 2 (50:50):
I'll pay for it myself. Only Grandma wants me there.
If you guys can pay for it, come along. But
you guys have still you guys still need to pay
me back for everything else. Yeah, and you guys haven't
done that. I just know that if she tells me
that sentence again, which she used so many times that
I can't count anymore, I will reach my point and
will go no contact with them. Split all home expenses equally,

(51:13):
and if they can't afford their share, I will force
them to sell our house, split the money, and never
contact her again. Would I be the a hole if
I did that?

Speaker 3 (51:21):
I don't think you would be the a whole. I
think it is like a hard thing to do, especially
with your parents, and you talk, you know of her
history of guilty, you with you know, saying like, oh, well,
I sacrificed a lot by leaving my country, but I
think that you need to do this for your peace
of mind. And you've been sacrificing a lot of your

(51:43):
mental health and well being to support your family and
not received anything in return.

Speaker 2 (51:49):
I was gonna say, why is she only coming after
up because this op is money? Why is she not
saying anything about the sister?

Speaker 3 (51:59):
Why she just doesn't have any money?

Speaker 2 (52:01):
She doesn't have any money.

Speaker 3 (52:02):
You can't ask.

Speaker 2 (52:03):
But if I were mom pushing, if mom's pushing me
so much, why are you not pushing sister to actually
get the job and help out with anything? Anything else?
Not everything else, just anything. So there is an edit.
Thank you to everyone for taking their time to help
me realize what was really happening. I came from a
culture where parents should be loved no matter what, as

(52:26):
they are still our parents. But I now realize that
some parents take that for granted and take advantage of
their children. Hence you. Maybe deep inside I was trying
to win them over and make them proud of me,
as they have always adored my sister. I will take
the courage to establish a boundary from now on and
prioritize my future instead.

Speaker 3 (52:45):
Yes, as you should.

Speaker 2 (52:46):
I am planning to have a discussion with them next
week when I visit them, and demand to share all
of the expenses and equally including my sister from now on,
for them to force her to get a job and
pay her shares too. If she refuses, I will force
her to move out or go back to our home country,
as she did not contribute anything since coming here. Maybe

(53:07):
maybe her being homeless or going back will wake her
up on how lucky she was and set her head straight.
And you can always set your head straight with us
live every weekday three pm PSD. Just tap our profile'll
stop it. There is a little bit more here, Sophia.

Speaker 3 (53:22):
But I think op, he's doing the right thing. I
think that your parents have been taking advantage of you
for a while, and you know, putting your sister above
you and making you feel guilty. H And I think
that it's totally fair of you to want to put
some boundaries.

Speaker 2 (53:36):
Out and find like some I called it, I was like,
when is the sister gonna come into this? And she
called out the sister.

Speaker 3 (53:42):
Like she's the favorite.

Speaker 2 (53:43):
She's the favorite, and no wonder, Mom's not, you know,
calling her out. Hopefully this discussion goes well and they understand,
but I guarantee you whether or not, and the sister
is gonna be very upset, and she does. She's like,
I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, but let's see.

Speaker 3 (53:59):
Hopefully story off.

Speaker 2 (54:01):
I will demand a written agreement that if they cannot
provide the funds for their shares, we will sell the
house and split the money. I still care about my
parents and have no issues equally sharing the money from
the sale since three of us is on the title,
to help them pay some of their debt and support themselves.
After this, I might go no contact for a good
while to focus on myself and achieving my goals. I

(54:22):
hope everything goes well when I confront them, but I
have a feeling that my mom would retaliate on my decision,
and we'll try to try and guilt trip or manipulate
me again, but I will stand my ground this time.
I will try my best to give an update on
how everything settles out in the end.

Speaker 3 (54:39):
And that is the end of that story.

Speaker 2 (54:41):
That was.

Speaker 3 (54:42):
But yeah, no, I think good on you. Put those
boundaries up. Don't let them walk all over you.

Speaker 2 (54:48):
Honestly, overall, I would sell the house. It's already so
much of a strain on everyone. Sell the house, go smaller,
go buy whatever they want. You don't have to worry
about the sister, So the sister back home. That's one
less head to worry. I know you want to care
and be there for your parents, but again, this is
so straighting on you and your education that you want

(55:09):
your life, you don't need them. This is a time
for you to be on your own and just take
care of yourself. And you only go.

Speaker 3 (55:16):
On that trip with your partner. Go on, go on
what I say you have to do. But that's the
end of that story. So we'll see you next time.

Speaker 4 (55:24):
See you.

Speaker 1 (55:25):
Hey, it's John here, og host of the show. We're
gonna get back to these juicy stories. But here's a
quick three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

Speaker 4 (55:31):
My father in law threatened to kick his own grandkids
out of his house, so we're cunning him out of theirs.

Speaker 1 (55:39):
Yeah, get kicked out of the family. Dork.

Speaker 4 (55:42):
I twenty seven female, and my husband twenty seven male,
had gotten separated at the beginning of the year. After
some time apart and better communication skills, we have decided
to fix our marriage.

Speaker 1 (55:52):
Oh good job.

Speaker 4 (55:54):
We have two sons together. One of them is four
and the other is three. By the way, this comes
from X Graham three regular ninety seven X on the
Rsishoka storytime separated it. During our separation, my husband and
children moved in with my father in law late fifties,
and I couldn't have thanked him more for giving my
children a stable place to live while I, on the

(56:14):
other hand, wasn't having the best of luck and moved
back home with my parents. A little backstory. My in
laws are everything to me. They accepted me with open arms,
accepting my oldest son whom I had gotten pregnant with
before getting together with my husband in twenty nineteen, and
took on the role as Papa and nana very well.

(56:35):
My father in law was always my favorite because he
knew the best possible words to help my husband and
I when we needed it the most. Oh he was
like a father figure I needed in my life, aside
from my stepfather, but that is a different story. When
my husband and I separated, they did what any normal
in laws would do. They forbid me from coming to

(56:56):
their house only to talk to my husband, see or
speak to the kids. Typical I'd be lying if I
said it didn't hurt, but I ever respected it with
the best of my ability. Fast forward to now. Oh,
for about two and a half years, my oldest son
has been diagnosed with ADHD that we can't properly test
or treat until he turns five, which won't be until

(57:17):
the first of the year, while also being diagnosed with
a behavioral disability while also getting over stimulated at times.
This is made of finding childcare for my son very
difficult at times since many places aren't equipped to handle
a child like that. Completely sucks, but it is what
it is. These days, we are taking the proper steps.

(57:38):
He has an appointment for occupational therapy later this month
to get us a better handle on our sons and
to give him the best ability he needs. Today, however,
he got expelled from his daycare slash preschool due to
him throwing chairs and hitting his classmates slash teachers. Oh no, no,
it hurts knowing they aren't willing to work with the

(58:00):
US until his appointment. But I figured out that that's
more about safety than anything. I'm respecting that everyone needs
to be safe, including the teachers. My husband has told
me multiple times since my son has been suspended multiple
times for the same behavior. While we are trying to
get him the help he properly needs, my father in
law has made it a point that if my oldest

(58:20):
son gets expelled from his daycare that he would throw
my husband and children in the street. Excuse me, knowing
they have nowhere else to go. What your own kid
like in your own grandkids, because he's because like some kid.
That's like trying to work through something.

Speaker 1 (58:39):
Right, It's like what your your four or five year
old kid has behavioral problems. And the grandfather's response is
just like, if that kid gets expelled, he's out of here.
We won't have it. Not in our long storied family
line have we ever had a child be expelled from
the school.

Speaker 4 (58:57):
For contact husband and I were saving money to be
able to get our own place, but inflation has made
that extremely hard, while also trying to tend to the
needs of our children without financial help from others. Not
complaining since this is our responsibility of obviously, but some
help once in a while would be nice given how
the world has turned out. When my husband got to
father in law's home after work, he told father in

(59:19):
law what happened, and all he did was scoff. I
fear my children will wake up being told they have
to leave. I have talked with my parents so far
one is okay with my family coming here until we
can find a place, while the other is currently sick,
so I haven't bombarded them with the idea. I want
to respect both my parents and get both of their
permissions instead of one due to this being their house.

(59:43):
I've made a point to my husband that if my
father in law kicks out my family to the street,
he will no longer be welcome into our lives and
will have nothing to do with our children. My husband
agreed and said, whether they get kicked out or leave voluntarily,
he is done with his father in law because not
only has he threatened this, but He has complained to
my husband about tiny things like his alarm going off

(01:00:03):
for longer than a minute, the children being typical children,
and many other things that seem like very petty compliments.
I think he's just done with Yeah. I know he's
young kids in his house.

Speaker 1 (01:00:13):
He's fully become the curmudgeony old man and he's like,
chime y'all, kid to get off the floor. It's like
they're sitting on the floor playing with and.

Speaker 4 (01:00:25):
He's not even old. He's like in his fifties.

Speaker 1 (01:00:27):
Yeah, but sometimes that's all it takes to become a curmudgeon.
Sometimes sometimes you just turn fifty something and you're like,
I hate the youth.

Speaker 4 (01:00:35):
Needless to say, for my husband, at father in law
hasn't been the greatest for him, and he is now
starting to see the type of person father in law
truly is. Mind you, I still respect my in laws
for taking in my sons during a time of need,
but he's starting to lose my respect for threatening to
throw my sons out in the street. Along with my
husband knowing we are doing everything in our power to

(01:00:56):
help our oldest son with the help he properly needs.
I don't want my children to lose their grandfather. But
I'm at my wits end being absolutely terrified of him,
and he has done many other things which I will
make an update or an edit if anyone wants to know.
And I really do not want him around my family
with the type of toxicity he has shown. I hate
how he was such a nice guy and this is

(01:01:17):
what he turned out to be. Yeah, so I'm asking
you as a mom, am I the a hole for
want of my father in law to have nothing to
do with my family when they move out from his home.
And we got an update. Oh boy, you're not the
a hole. I mean, it sucks to see someone that
has been really nice, and I understand some people can
be like tired of certain situations, kicking their kid out
in the street when they need help.

Speaker 1 (01:01:38):
Well, dude, it's like also, it'd be different if the
kid was a little older. Maybe, Yeah, this is a toddler. Basically,
this is a four year old kid. Two toddlers with
like behavioral problems. It's not it's not like they're no
like you know, sixteen and like causing a ruckus around
their neighborhood.

Speaker 4 (01:01:56):
We got an update. First of all, I want to
thank everyone for the supportive comments when it comes to
my oldest son, I've been struggling for years, and it
means so much to know that people are out there
willing to listen and give advice instead of constantly judging me.
So thank you for those who commented, for those who
think I am the a hole for wanting this. It
wasn't my first decision. My father in law has been

(01:02:18):
a good man in my eyes, but I have started
to see the truth of how he truly is, and
if I'm being honest, my sons don't need to be
around that. When my husband and children first moved in
with father in law, my son was doing great. He
was thriving at his daycare size preschool. He only had
occasional fights with his classmates over toys, but nothing to
the extent of what we're dealing with now. My husband

(01:02:39):
and I have come to the conclusion that my oldest
has been acting more violent in terms of his behavior.
It seems stemming off the tension in my father in
law's house that my own father in law has caused
by yelling at my husband for things out of his
control that don't involve our kids. Oh As many parents
will agree, children will fill that tension and act out
in ways normal behavior. It hurts that my son has

(01:03:03):
gone through with dealing with this and that I'm not
able to be there in person to properly help my son. However,
things have been doing better. My brother had said she
and I will talk to my father when he starts
to feel a little bit better. He is the parent
that is currently sick and my oldest son coming to
live with me primarily to relieve the tension that is
going on at my father in law's house. I do

(01:03:24):
believe it will help, but I don't see him criticizing
towards my husband ever stopping. But I don't see the
criticism towards my husband ever stopping. Starting Tuesday, I am
taking the steps to get my son into a local
center that helps children with behavioral disabilities and ADHD and
sorts of therapy to properly help my son.

Speaker 1 (01:03:43):
It sounds like a profect time to get him in there,
Let's go.

Speaker 4 (01:03:47):
I'm also going to get daycare assistance in my county
to help get my son into a regular daycare, and
going to be taking steps with my local department to
get my son health benefits and anything else they can
get to properly give us to ABIL so I don't
have to rely on my parents for much other than
a place to live until I can find my own.
As for my youngest son and husband, they haven't been

(01:04:07):
kicked out, thankfully, but I fear my father in law
will not let up on how he treats my husband
and my youngest will end up acting because of that. Surely,
it's just a feeling I have, but we are taking
things day by day. When things change, I will update again.
Thank you for those who have supported me in giving
me advice. We have a second update.

Speaker 1 (01:04:28):
Ooh, we got a second update.

Speaker 4 (01:04:30):
Update two. Hello everyone, it's been a couple of days
since my last post and I wanted to share a
few details that have changed. First, my oldest son is
with me. I am working on getting him into my
doctor's office for his pediatrician visits and finish up the
set for ot here in my county. I'm getting him
the state medical card to help with those things as well,

(01:04:51):
along with getting daycare assistants in my county and getting
him into preschool or head start.

Speaker 1 (01:04:56):
Well, you've been very busy.

Speaker 4 (01:04:58):
My son is very excited to living with his mom,
and I couldn't be more happy. My husband has been
working long hours to get some good money. He is
hoping to be out of his father in law's house
by this weekend. What he doesn't know is my mother
and I have been talking and if he were to
get this job at the company she works for, she
was planning on having him move in with us to

(01:05:20):
save more money for all of us to get our
own place. I'm really hoping he gets this job and
gets away from that toxicity for the sake of his
sanity and our children's safety. Wow.

Speaker 1 (01:05:31):
Think of the children, Think of the children, and think
of us.

Speaker 4 (01:05:34):
Every weekday at three PMPSD when we go live on YouTube,
just tap our profile. I like the momentum we got
going on here. It's everything is going into good direction.

Speaker 1 (01:05:43):
It feels like everything's going in the proper direction for the.

Speaker 4 (01:05:46):
Child, for the child, the child and my husband.

Speaker 1 (01:05:49):
And we need to we care for the children.

Speaker 4 (01:05:52):
Yep, the big question has been running through my mind.
I want to send my father in law a message
when my family gets up here, telling him he will
no longer be allowed to contact me or my husband
to talk to my children.

Speaker 1 (01:06:04):
Boom.

Speaker 4 (01:06:04):
He might end up cutting off my husband's phone, but
that'll be fine. I have a phone for my husband
to use, and he will be put on my phone
plan for next to nothing, so a lot of bases
covered if that were to be the case. Basically, what
I'm asking is this, would I be in the wrong
sending that message? Or should I let my husband do it?
I know either way the blowout is it going to

(01:06:25):
be good and all of us will get the backlash
of it, including my mother, who my father in law
has already dragged to the mess, even when it doesn't
fully involve her. I am not sure what to do.
Any advice would be great. If I were you, I'd
let the husband do it. That's not my parent, but
I understand you guys are married now, so you I
feel like you may have that right to do it
whatever you feel is best.

Speaker 1 (01:06:45):
That's funny you said that, because from my perspective, it's
like I would be like, you know, you do it
because or no, no, no, I mean not you do it.
Hope I'll do it because he already doesn't like me. Yeah,
it's like let him direct all his anger at me. Whatever.
It's like, I don't want your relationship with your dad
to get worse because like he's it's definitely not gonna

(01:07:07):
get better with me.

Speaker 4 (01:07:07):
Yeah, I'm just like slightly on the husband saying it side.
But I mean either way, I'm cool with man. I'm like,
it's like neutral husband doing it.

Speaker 1 (01:07:19):
It's probably about equal either way. It's just like when
we might have slightly less collateral damage if you even
consider that, because I think the husband already said, like,
regardless of what happens, I'm I'm cutting him off because yeah,
that was an absurd thing for him to try to say.

Speaker 4 (01:07:36):
So crazy. Anyway, that's the end of that story.

Speaker 1 (01:07:38):
That is the end of that story. My in laws
are driving me crazy with their manipulations. They want to
turn my fiance against me h.

Speaker 2 (01:07:52):
For what he was my child.

Speaker 1 (01:07:54):
First, all names in this story are fake. Even at
the very beginning of our relationship, I twenty five female
and my fiance Kevin twenty seven male, knew we were
going to get married one day. Oh isn't that cute?

Speaker 4 (01:08:07):
That's a doble.

Speaker 1 (01:08:08):
We weren't discussing it much with anyone else at the time.
We had a long distance relationship and I would stay
at his house on weekends sometimes. At that time, he
lived with his parents because they needed help. By the way,
this comes from user son Worshiper on the r slash
Okay story Times subreddit. My fiance's job sometimes requires him
to attend games of the nearest NFL team because the

(01:08:31):
company rents a suite there and uses it to schmooze clients.
He had a game to attend on a weekend I
was visiting, but I was planning to go home Sunday
before the game since I had other plans. When those
plans fell through, we decided that I would stay at
the house while Kevin and his father, Barry, went to
the game. Then we would spend more time together after
he had been planning to take his dad for a

(01:08:53):
while since his dad is a huge fan of the team.
I personally don't know how football works and don't care to,
as I don't like it. Well. To be fair, if
you don't know how it works, you're definitely not gonna
like it exactly. I'm also extremely uncomfortable being outlay in
a crowd or in loud environments. I've been abused at
various points in my life and have severe PTSD and agoraphobia.

(01:09:15):
My fiance knew I wouldn't want to go to the game,
so he made no plans for me to attend. Saturday,
while we were out doing things, his parents, Barry and Belinda,
kept texting him, insisting that I should go to the
game instead of Barry. He explained that I wouldn't want
to go, but no matter how many times he said
it or explained why, they kept insisting, annoying, always annoying.

(01:09:38):
When we got home later that day, all four of
us talked. I explained multiple reasons why I didn't want
to go. They still pushed. If I said I didn't
like football, they didn't know anything about it, or wouldn't
enjoy it. They dismissed it, saying I would because we'd
be in a suite and it's a once in a
lifetime opportunity. Eventually I became exhaust and left the room

(01:10:01):
to cry. This should have been a red flag about
his parents. He was finally able to get through to them,
and the next day they went to the game without me.
While I was at the house, I mostly stayed in
Kevin's room while Belinda watched TV in the living room.
We briefly talked when I went in there, but not
about anything significant. I didn't feel comfortable mentioning the type
of engagement ring I wanted to his mother because this

(01:10:24):
was only my second time meeting her. That would have
felt very weird to me. My fiance and I had
discussed what kind of ring I wanted, and I told
him I preferred a gemstone ring. I like the colors
rather than just a clear diamond. A week or so later,
Kevin and I were texting about rings, and he insisted
on a diamond because that's what he thought I wanted.

Speaker 4 (01:10:44):
Yes, because this is his engagement.

Speaker 1 (01:10:47):
You want diamond, yep, I decide. Due to past abuse,
it's hard for me to voice my opinion, but I
trust Kevin, so I told him what I wanted and
expected him to honor it if he wanted to be
my husband. I didn't ask for a diamond, but I
wanted somebody who cares about my voice and listens to
my wishes. With my past abusive situations, I didn't get

(01:11:09):
a choice or a voice. Still, he insisted on a diamond,
saying that was what I wanted and that I just
wasn't telling him what Who's mmmm. I suspect that the
mother in law has something to do with.

Speaker 4 (01:11:24):
This, oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:11:26):
We went back and forth for hours and it was draining.
I have no idea where he got the idea that
I wanted a diamond. He eventually told me that I
had told his mother I wanted a diamond when we
were alone and they were at the game, but we
never even discussed rings. What a weird what a weird
power play.

Speaker 4 (01:11:46):
So they're trying to get her to the game so
they could just pressure her more on this.

Speaker 1 (01:11:50):
I don't know, I don't know, like what, I don't
know if the game has anything to do with that.
I think it might just be a completely separate event
of like, also, okay, yeah, I'm just going to lie
to your husband and.

Speaker 4 (01:12:03):
They're going to the game speaking proposed to her, and
he's already by her a clear domino ring and it's
a once in a lifetime oh once a long time
going come.

Speaker 1 (01:12:13):
Why would she make up such a lie that is
so weird and manipulative? Why would it matter to her?
Wouldn't she want him to get the ring I wanted.
It's the weirdest lie ever. There have been many times
in our relationship that his parents have belittled my choices
or promised things and then gone back on them. He says,
they are just busy dealing with family problems, so I

(01:12:34):
should get over it every time they let us down.
I'm dealing with similar issues with my own family, but
I still try to fulfill my promises to people despite this,
even though he uses their busy schedules as an excuse
for their failure to follow through on promises. Butlinda still
wants to help plan the wedding but has never reached
out to me. I was just trying to follow proper
wedding etiquette, which I was taught means the mother of

(01:12:56):
the groom should reach out to offer help if she
wants to. I also thought, if they can't even do
the little things they promise, how can they help plan
my wedding? Fair?

Speaker 3 (01:13:06):
Fair point.

Speaker 1 (01:13:07):
Kevin and I have been living together and sometimes after
work he visits his parents. Every time he comes home,
our wedding plans change. Oh, he's getting the little whenever
he goes back home.

Speaker 4 (01:13:21):
Who's doing it though? The father and the mother in law.

Speaker 1 (01:13:24):
It's gotta be both.

Speaker 4 (01:13:25):
I like to think the mother in law is like
puppeteering the father and the son.

Speaker 1 (01:13:30):
Maybe could be just the mother in law, but I
feel like. The father in law was also like, they
sat down and had that conversation about why she doesn't
want to go to the game, and both of them
were just like, Nah, you're being dumb. You want to
go to the game. Stupid, don't you know? His mom
gave him a list of things to remove from our
wedding and registry. She also just doesn't like the soup

(01:13:54):
company I picked out, and blah blah blah blah, so
many things she doesn't like. She wants to send wedding
announcements with the registry information to people who were invited
to the wedding, which I think is terrible etiquette. When
she finally reached out to offer help, it was in
a group text with Belinda, Barry, Kevin, and me. I
tried to find something for her to help with that

(01:14:15):
wouldn't be too overwhelming for her, and I asked her
to help me pick out flowers for arrangements. I was
very specific about what I didn't want and what I
was looking for. A few weeks later, she showed me
floral arrangements with only the things I had said no to,
and they were her favorites, something I didn't know until
Kevin pointed it out.

Speaker 4 (01:14:35):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (01:14:36):
After I texted her about the flowers, she brought up
another issue with the wedding hymn singing. Oh lovely congregational
hymn singing is a part of my faith tradition, and
it's done it every wedding.

Speaker 4 (01:14:47):
Okay, so it should be done at.

Speaker 1 (01:14:48):
Yours if that's how it is, that's what it is.
Though I'm a new convert, it's one of the most
important aspects to me. We aren't getting married at my
church because my fiance didn't want to go through the
required premarital counseling and his father, who is ordained, will officiate.
That's important to him. So I compromised. I specifically found
a venue with an organ so there could be congregational

(01:15:11):
him singing.

Speaker 4 (01:15:12):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:15:13):
We actually had a fight a few days before because
Kevin mentioned this to his parents and they didn't like it.

Speaker 4 (01:15:20):
Surprise, surprise, what toasts, Kevin, what toast? Spine, Kevin wet toast.

Speaker 1 (01:15:25):
When he came home, he tried to talk me out
of it, but I stood my ground because it's important
to me. He realized this, so after some back and forth,
Kevin told his parents that we would be singing hymns.
I thought the matter was closed, but here they were
bringing it up again through text. What why? Why? I mean, stop,
just what are you doing? Just let him do it?

Speaker 4 (01:15:46):
Come, what's the big deal. It's their wedding, not yours.
What did you guys not have a good wedding? Are
you trying to like make make one for yourself?

Speaker 1 (01:15:53):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (01:15:54):
What's happening here?

Speaker 1 (01:15:55):
It's there's some it's weird, just too controlling the way
they brought it up through Kevin under the bus and
made him sound stupid. They basically acted like he mistook
what I wanted and didn't tell them right, because there's
no way I could want hymns. They said people don't
sing hymns at weddings and that it would make the
environment uncomfortable. After a few more rounds of back and forth,

(01:16:17):
and with Kevin standing firm on our decision, saying we
have disgusted at length, this is what we're doing. It's
very important to her that we do it this way,
his mother responded with a message that started quote, it's
a mistake. Thanks mom, thanks for the thanks.

Speaker 4 (01:16:31):
Breaking up with Kevin's come on, no respect, no respect,
Give rid of Kevin and got no respect.

Speaker 1 (01:16:37):
Get rid of Kevin. Oh yeah, get rid of the man. Yeah,
I get rid of Kevin. He's but he's supporting her.
He's wet toasting. Not really, he's literally standing on business
as we speak. He's literally he literally just said, this
is what we're doing. It's important to her, so we're
doing it. She went on to rant about how our
wedding would be a train wreck. Kevin texted her one

(01:16:58):
on one afterwards because he thought her mess was unnecessary
and uncalled for. By the way, it would never be
uncalled for you to join us live on YouTube every
weekday at three pm PST. Just tap our profile. She
also scoffed at the idea of wedding programs, saying they
don't exist and are only for funerals. So apparently no

(01:17:19):
one sings hymns at weddings. Wedding programs don't exist, and
it's perfectly appropriate to send wedding announcements with registry information
to people not invited to the wedding. Got it. Sorry,
this story is all over the place. I tried to
leave out other issues with them that don't involve the wedding.
It's always one thing after another, and I just feel
stupid and not good enough. Well sorry, op, but you're

(01:17:41):
not stupid and you are good enough.

Speaker 4 (01:17:43):
There we go.

Speaker 1 (01:17:44):
Even my opinions and likes are not good enough for them.
I'm worried about the future and how they'll try to micromanage,
dictate and judge our future family and our decisions. Thank
you everyone. Hopefully someone has some advice. Am I making
a mountain out of them? Am I the a hole?
What should I do next? I probably need to post

(01:18:04):
the drama with one of my bridesmaids. Oh please do go.
I think that the best thing to do in this
situation is like you set the hard boundary, You have
the hard talk with the in laws with the support
of your husband, and you just say, look, this is
what we're doing. These are the decisions we've made, and

(01:18:26):
we're following through on them. We would we no longer
require any additional input. And if they continue to gap,
that's where you go, all right, you're not going to
the wedding, yep. And then they can try to backpedal
out of that. But I guarantee you it's like, or
maybe maybe say it up front, it's like we are
no longer accepting advice and if you guys continue to

(01:18:49):
not respect this boundary, you will not be at the wedding.

Speaker 4 (01:18:52):
Only if Kevin's wet toa spine can turn is the
sour widow. This is a great test to see if
you guys can't get married or not. So honest, glad
this happened to up. Yeah, you're about to see if
this is the man of your future or not?

Speaker 1 (01:19:04):
Yeah? Do you really want to be with a man
who can't stand up to his family?

Speaker 4 (01:19:07):
But that's the end of that story.

Speaker 1 (01:19:09):
Is the end of that story?

Speaker 4 (01:19:10):
The episode do you Love Us? Make sure to.

Speaker 1 (01:19:12):
Subscribe to us. Make sure you subscribe. We love you
and see you tomorrow.

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}My boyfriend’s father HATES how I look…so my boyfriend dropped him! - r/charloteedobreyoutube | Reddit Stories | EP2032