My brother finally realized how self-centered his ex-girlfriend was after she demanded that he pay her car payments! - r/entitledpeople | Reddit Stories | EP2173 - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
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Speaker 3 (00:18):
My brother finally realized what narcisstis ex girlfriend is after
she demanded he pay her car payments.

Speaker 4 (00:28):
Did he pay my car payments too?

Speaker 2 (00:29):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (00:30):
Can he pay mine as well? I mean, if that's
going around these days. Context, my brother dated a narcissist
that lied with every breath she took, faked illnesses for
both her and her children, made sure my niece, the
only biological child my brother has, didn't get anything that
her four crotch goblins couldn't get to, cheated on him
and gas led him to the point my brother's view
of himself was completely destroyed by the way this comes

(00:51):
from users Smile Fearless and if you want to submit
your stories, go to the r slash Okay Storytime subred it.
He was basically in an abusive relationship for ten years
in didn't realize it until recently she had all his passwords.
Later found out she had all his daughter's passwords as well,
and would make Facebook posts on their behalf to type
about how she was an amazing wife and stepmom and

(01:12):
how much they adored her. My niece was the first
to admit she never wrote any of that stuff, and
then in actuality she hated share it well. The witch
named Shannon left my brother for another man. After the
initial hurt wore off, he realized how much better his
life was without her. He was able to actually spend
money on himself. He bought himself new jeans, got a

(01:33):
new car, and lavished his daughter with everything he wouldn't
have been able to get her before, because if he did,
he would have had to buy five of them, because
if her children didn't get it, it wasn't fair and
she'd pitch a raging fit. My niece got a new wardrobe,
a new phone, new baseball gear, you name it. The
funny thing is that Shannon left my brother for a
man she thought was rich, but it turns out he was.

Speaker 2 (01:54):
Just as much of a liar as she was. On
near de perfect for you.

Speaker 3 (02:02):
For the first time, her children didn't have new clothes
for school, and her bills were starting to pile up.
At one point, she did do something nice. She returned
a phone that my brother was wanting back. She had
stolen a lot of his things when she left, mostly
his hoodies my mother had bought him for Christmas. Now,
after she did this, she contacted my brother asking if
he would pay her nine hundred dollars car payment because
she's at risk for having her car repossessed. My brother

(02:24):
was understandably forward she asked such a thing, and he
told her no. Thanksgiving was coming up and he needed
the money to travel to the US. This would be
the first time he'd ever been able to spend it
with us in years.

Speaker 2 (02:36):
Every holiday she could, she'd try and.

Speaker 3 (02:39):
Keep him from coming, and if they did come, her
kids would run around being loud and eating my other
niece's diabetic snacks. If we got onto them, Shannon would
get huffy and demand to leave because quote our family
was disrespecting her again as a mother.

Speaker 2 (02:54):
Her little demons are just the worst, and.

Speaker 3 (02:56):
To make matters more horrifying, she'd put them up to
do it things.

Speaker 2 (03:00):
Once she even.

Speaker 3 (03:01):
Got her little girl to throw rocks at my mother
and when she asked her to stop because she could
put an eye out. Wentto Facebook and completely twisted the story,
saying my mom screamed in her poor girl's face, which
did not happen.

Speaker 4 (03:15):
Who is this?

Speaker 2 (03:16):
This woman just.

Speaker 3 (03:17):
A vile witch from some unspoken place. I don't know,
core of this planets from the woods. She crawled out
of a den in the woods. She's a force of nature.

Speaker 4 (03:27):
Getting the children involved to do your dirty work.

Speaker 2 (03:31):
Is It's crazy.

Speaker 3 (03:31):
Shannon got angry with my brother and started posting on Facebook,
telling everyone that my brother was selfish, that he had
all this money now and wouldn't help her. Of course,
people started looking at her like she was a lunatic.
She left my brother, bragged she had a rich man
and was now saying my brother was selfish for not
paying her bills. Word got back to my brother and
for the first time, he stood up for himself.

Speaker 2 (03:52):
He told her that.

Speaker 3 (03:53):
He sacrificed ten years of his life and went without
so that she and her children didn't have to. And
how did she repay him by cheating on him, causing
problems for our family, manipulating his daughter, spreading lies about him.
And now she has the audacity to call him selfish.
Shannon promptly deleted the Facebook post and has been quiet
for a few days now, which, by the way, you

(04:14):
should be screenshotting these to have his evidence. But I'm
so proud of my brother for standing his ground and
not giving into her, considering we dealt with this woman
for ten years. There's a lot of stories that I
have about her, and she just continues to create more.
I'm not exaggerating when I say she'll stab you in
the back, tell you about how every man wants her,
and then start drama just so she can twist it

(04:35):
around where she's the victim. And there is an update.
What could we possibly hear about in this updea.

Speaker 2 (04:40):
Change your ways?

Speaker 4 (04:41):
She's asking for forgiveness and she's gonna pay her car loans.

Speaker 3 (04:45):
I am gonna go ahead and guess the exact opposite
of that. I'm gonna guess a little cheeky breaking and
entering going on here.

Speaker 4 (04:51):
You know, I'm a pessimist.

Speaker 3 (04:52):
I made a post yesterday about my brother's ex narcissistic
girlfriend and some people ask for more stories or an
update when one comes out.

Speaker 2 (04:58):
There will probably be one soon.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
And as my niece is running for homecoming queen after
being chosen by some of her classmates. Shannon's eldest daughter
will call her Minnie, is in the same grade as
my niece, and they're both livid. My family dealt with
Shannon for nearly ten years, and in those years, she
racked up quite a few stories. One of them that
I remember the best was when we first found out
about her true nature. My brother had just divorced my
niece's mother, which just really quick, I think, is Shannon.

(05:22):
My mom and I were going over to his house
to redecorate and paint the place up to kind of
cheer him up by making it more his style. I
was only like fourteen or fifteen when this happened. When
we pulled up to the house, there were piles of
clothing outside in the yard, along with furniture. My mom
was confused, and my brother explained that Shannon's mother kicked
her and the kids out after a heated argument and

(05:42):
they had nowhere else to go. He didn't know what
to do. He didn't agree to let her stay with him,
but she had three kids at the time and was
pregnant with another. He felt like he didn't have a
choice but to let her stay, and ironically enough, my
mom believes Shannon and her mother planned this because the
very next day they had lunch together and acted like
the best of friends. Yeah, it sounds like the narcissistic
scheming apple doesn't fall far from the narcissistic scheming tree.

Speaker 4 (06:07):
They're very delectable in fall time.

Speaker 3 (06:09):
And they're not bitter. They're just crab apples. Dude, there's
a couple of crab apples. My brother's biological father was
anything but a family man, so my brother strives to
be the exact opposite of him. Within a month of
them dating, Shannon was already moving into his home. My
mother and I helped her move things in, and my
mom got to notice a few red flags. The main
I remember being is that all the children's clothes looked

(06:31):
two sizes too small for them. I looked at the
kids and she was right. The clothes they were wearing
were stained up, which is normal for children, and they
were much too small. We questioned it, and Shannon painted
a haunting story about how abusive her ex husband was,
how he had stolen all of her children's good clothes
and locked her in a bathroom to keep her from leaving.
And how she had to climb out the window to
get away from him. My mom found that to be
an odd story. Why would he steal their clothes. After

(06:54):
some snooping, my mom found out her ex was actually
a decent man who didn't have any of his children's
clothes other than what he bought them after they split up.
He stated, Shannon never bought the kid's new clothing, and
this would prove to be true in the years to come. Now,
while my mom and I were decorating my brother's home,
one thing she did was hanging several pictures of my
brother and his daughter in the living room. The biggest
picture was one we had professionally done of my niece

(07:15):
in a white dress holding on lacey umbrella that made
her look like a little doll when she was younger,
around three.

Speaker 2 (07:20):
She was about five or six when this happened.

Speaker 3 (07:22):
A few weeks after moving in, Shannon stated that she
wanted to take family photos for her parents and asked
my mother, who was working on getting her photography career
off the ground, to take them. My mother agreed, and
the day she chose to take them, my niece was
at her mother's house. Now, at one point during the
photo taking, she asked my brother to be in My
mom was hesitant, dating if she wanted to include my brother,

(07:43):
then would she mind waiting for a day when his
daughter was here to be in the photograph. Shannon stated
that it was just for her parents and grandparents, that
they liked my brother a lot and would love to
have him in the photo. Not wanting to argue, my
mom took the photos and after they were finished with
touch ups, my mom gave her a few of the copies.
The next time we went over to their house, I
saw my mom freeze in the doorway. I looked up

(08:04):
and noticed that the wall we had decorated with pictures
had been altered. The only pictures with my niece in
it were the small ones, and the rest had been moved,
including the large professional one in its place the family
photo with my brother in it and without my niece.

Speaker 4 (08:20):
I wonder who moved it.

Speaker 2 (08:21):
This is just.

Speaker 3 (08:22):
Creep o behavior, Like I know this, This seems like
a small thing to blow up at, but honestly, I
kind of be blowing up.

Speaker 4 (08:29):
This is getting to the territory of psychotic.

Speaker 3 (08:32):
Right where it's like, I'm sorry, who do you think
you are? You think you can just come in here
and what change the photographs in my house?

Speaker 1 (08:38):
Like what?

Speaker 5 (08:39):
Or two?

Speaker 4 (08:39):
Fine, but all the ones, especially with the niece in them, she.

Speaker 3 (08:43):
Thinks she can come in there and then like, well
it's not I guess it's not their house, but it's
like it's still very odd. My mom demanded to know
where the photo was in a not so calm voice.
Way to go, Mom, Shannon explained she had it moved
to the hallway. My mom went to the hall and
stopped when she was in my niece's room. The new
bunk my brother had bought her had crayola all over it.
It was built from woods, so the crayola couldn't wash

(09:05):
off entirely. Her shelves that had expensive Barbie still in
the box were ripped from the walls. My mom walked
in just in time to see one of the boys
jump from her top bed onto a mattress that had
been dugged into the room and possibly for the other
kids to sleep on. The youngest girl was hanging from
one of the shelves that hadn't been torn down yet.
The kids were treating her room like a jungle gym.
While my niece was at her mother's get her.

Speaker 2 (09:27):
Out of there, dish.

Speaker 4 (09:27):
Shannon is scum of the earth.

Speaker 3 (09:30):
And so clearly Opie's niece that is being sort of
excluded here is not Shannon's daughter.

Speaker 2 (09:35):
No, no, So it's like, that's why this is happening.

Speaker 3 (09:37):
That's because which is the biggest scumbag thing you could
do as someone entering a relationship and you have kids
of your own, and you're gonna what, exclude your partner's kids.

Speaker 4 (09:49):
She's not mine. I didn't give birth to her, so
I shouldn't.

Speaker 2 (09:52):
Care, scumbag.

Speaker 3 (09:54):
My mom went crazy bananas, yelling at them that what
they were doing wasn't safe, before completely rounding on Shannon.

Speaker 2 (10:01):
I won't say my mom was calm because she wasn't.

Speaker 3 (10:04):
All our work to make the house look nice was
being destroyed, and my niece is and always has been
a neat freak who was going to probably burst into tears.

Speaker 2 (10:11):
When she saw her room.

Speaker 3 (10:12):
My mom began screaming at Shannon, stating, how dare she
let her children destroy someone else's room and how dare
she move a family photo onto the wall? Didn't she
realize how that would make my niece feel excluded?

Speaker 2 (10:24):
Yes she did. I'm gonna guarantee you that she did.

Speaker 3 (10:26):
Shannon began to cry, stating that she didn't want to
make her children feel left out, and what about my kids?

Speaker 2 (10:33):
Are my kids supposed to go without?

Speaker 3 (10:34):
My brother was on my mom's side, as he hadn't
seen the room yet. However, that changed with one thing
Shannon did. She faked heart complications. She clutched her chest
and told my mom she couldn't get worked up she
had a heart condition. We later learned from her family
that this was a lie psychotic behavior.

Speaker 4 (10:52):
At first, I was like, Okay, maybe she's just a
terrible person, but she's a terrible person who's also.

Speaker 3 (10:56):
A psychopath psychotic. My brother, who became worried to my
mom he would talk to her. My mom told me
to get into the car and we left. She was
livid the entire night, and of course, when my niece
got home she saw her room and the family photo.
I'm not sure how she reacted to the room, but
the next time she came over to our house, she
asked my mom why she would take a family photo
without her. My brother promptly removed the photo, telling Shannon

(11:18):
she wanted to give it to her parents, so it
better go to their house. Of course, she fake cried again,
stating my brother didn't see her children as family. When
that didn't work, she pretended that her getting upset caused
her to have more heart pains, and after that, my
brother began walking on eggshells to prevent her from getting upset,
worried he throw her into a heart attack. We own't, yeah, truly,
get her out of here. Get her out of here.

(11:40):
I don't want her in the same solar system as me.

Speaker 4 (11:43):
What's up with the brother just not figuring it out?
I don't know, man, this is so blatant, smacking the
face like so red all over, But what are you doing?
He probably leads with his heart, dude.

Speaker 3 (11:55):
You know, we only learned recently that she doesn't have
this heart condition, and never did. It was all used
as a weapon to keep my brother from upsetting her.
The next time we came over to the house, my
brother had put the shelves back up, and from what
I could tell, tried his hardest to scrub the crayole
off the bed, but the kids were still jumping off
the top bunk and making an overall mess out of
her room. When I questioned it, Shannon gave me a

(12:16):
look and stated, well, they live here too, they need
a room too. My problem wasn't the room, but rather
the fact that they were bothering my niece's things and
destroying the room. I had no problem with them sleeping
in it or keeping their toys in it. However, believing
that her heart condition was real, I bowed out of
the conversation, worried I'd set her off.

Speaker 2 (12:34):
Things only escalated.

Speaker 3 (12:35):
When my mom put up photos of all her grandkids
and children around her fireplace.

Speaker 2 (12:39):
When Shannon came over, her face fell.

Speaker 3 (12:41):
She began hysterically crying, stating that my mother didn't see
her children as her grandkids.

Speaker 2 (12:46):
My mom was floored, saying she'd only known her children
for like six months and didn't have any photos of
them anyways. Shannon complained to my brother, but he told
her that she couldn't force Mom to change how she decorates,
especially if she doesn't have pictures. So my mom could
a deal with Shannon if she he provides the picture,
she'd put them up. However, Shannon didn't do this and
instead told anyone who would listen that my mother hated
her children. When asked about it, my mom said she

(13:08):
had nothing against the kids, they were just kids. Their mother, however,
she was beginning to hate very much.

Speaker 3 (13:13):
Within a few months, Shannon's children had broken my brother's TV,
spray painted his coffee table, somehow managed to cut up
the walls with what may have been scissors, destroyed nearly
anything decorative that was glass, and tore holes in his couch.

Speaker 4 (13:26):
So they're demons.

Speaker 2 (13:27):
How are the kids spray painting the coffee table? Who's watching?
These little kids? Are breaking? Monsters? Doing? Are they doing?

Speaker 3 (13:32):
Wwe moves in the house? And how is this being
let slide?

Speaker 2 (13:36):
This is insane.

Speaker 3 (13:37):
All of his nice furniture was replaced by secondhand things
that didn't look nearly as good or matched together. What
was worse was when he lost to the house. Shannon
had stated that she was paying the house payment, but
the woman they were supposed to be making payments too,
said she hadn't received money in nine months.

Speaker 2 (13:52):
So not only are.

Speaker 3 (13:54):
Our kids ruining things, she's not paying the payments. And
how are they not broken up?

Speaker 2 (14:00):
Already?

Speaker 4 (14:01):
Love is stronger than any material in this world. Dakota.

Speaker 2 (14:04):
This might be a really hot take.

Speaker 3 (14:06):
I don't know, but I feel like your partner having
demon children, a perfectly acceptable reason to not be with them.
So my brother ended up being evicted from his house
and had to move into an apartment in Shannon's name
that her father had given to them. When this happened,
my mom demanded to know why Shannon didn't to move
into this apartment when her mother first kicked her out,

(14:27):
But of course, Shannon faked her heart condition again, saying
it was too stressful for her to talk about the
situation with her mother. Even though they hung out often,
according to her, they were still fighting, that is, her mother.
Within less than a year, my brother lost most of
his good furniture and his house, but was too afraid
to say anything because he was afraid of upsetting Shannon.
And we didn't know it at the time, but she
was using his divorce against him, using it to make

(14:48):
him feel like if he didn't have her, he'd never
have anyone. That she was this angel that accepted him
and that his wife left him because he was.

Speaker 4 (14:55):
I feel bad for the brother, but also, why are
you so gullible dude?

Speaker 2 (14:58):
Given her the number fifteen?

Speaker 3 (15:00):
So my brother is very self conscious about his intellect,
as he does have a learning disability, so he started
going with what Shannon said because he saw her as
this intelligent person that.

Speaker 4 (15:10):
Has been learning disability and she's taking so much advantage.

Speaker 3 (15:13):
Dude, you I want a drop kicker. I'm gonna freak
it back back to the depths she came from. Now,
my brother is constantly down on himself. He's afraid to
try anything career rize if it has a written exam
that has to be taken, such as real estate, because
he believes he's not smart enough to pass it, and
because the apartment was in her name. Anytime my brother
would do something like question her motives, she'd just throw
him out. My brother, feeling like he was in the wrong,

(15:34):
would always apologize and she'd take him back and give
him a second chance since she loved him so much.
She really just messed with his head. The house and
the furniture were just items. But my brother and niece's
self esteem and empathy towards others has been completely altered.

Speaker 2 (15:48):
They both think lowly of.

Speaker 3 (15:50):
Themselves and are both now very hesitant to believe anyone's stories,
which is sad because most sane people aren't going to
lie about having a medical condition, which is true. This
person is insane, I know it really affected my niece
because I was telling her about a girl I know
who had cancer a few months back, and one of
the first questions she asked me was, are you sure
she really had it? I told her people don't lie

(16:11):
about that, and there's video of her ringing the bell
when she was deemed cancer free shout out my mom
who did the same thing, as well as pictures of
her after she shaved her hair when it was falling out.
Her response, Shannon would lie. I couldn't disagree with her
because all of the medical illnesses she said she had
or her children had only turned out to be lies.
So examples include one of her children having autism and

(16:32):
the other one having her stomach muscles deteriorate to the
point that her intestines had fallen on top of each other,
making it where she couldn't use the bathroom. No surgery
was ever done, and supposedly the doctor gave her little laxatives.
I'm not a doctor, but I'm pretty sure that's the
serious condition requiring surgery. It's a little heartbreaking to know
this woman warped my niece's view of the world to
the point she now thinks people's actions or their medical

(16:53):
state might have some ulterior motive. Now my brother is
showering her with gifts and trying his best to move
on with a new girlfriend he met. However, every night,
at least during the beginning stages of the relationship he
called my mom terrified that he's going to screw it up.
He's going to bounce back. Hey, you're going to bounce back.
Find a great partner.

Speaker 4 (17:10):
He needs to support compass also, because this is ten
years of him just being his brain morphing into like
I'm not good enough. I don't I guess it's not
I'm not the best.

Speaker 2 (17:21):
So you need probably some counselings and therapy. I think
for op and and the children.

Speaker 3 (17:27):
And the children, the children who have had their confidence
and their worldview mixed up by this individual need guidance.

Speaker 4 (17:34):
Yeah, this is so I feel so bad.

Speaker 3 (17:37):
Yeah, and dude, let this be a lesson, Like, if
you feel weird vibes, your gut will seldom lead you wrong.

Speaker 4 (17:44):
Always trust your gut.

Speaker 2 (17:46):
If your gut's telling you something like hear it out
at the very least.

Speaker 4 (17:49):
So Shannon is a scumbag demon, a psychopath that seems
like and a pathological liar.

Speaker 3 (17:56):
Yeah, a great combo, the Unholy Trinity. Before we get
into it, I just want to let you know that
you can listen to full episodes with stories like this.
All you gotta do is go to your favorite podcast platform,
whatever it may be, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, wherever you get
your podcasts from and search Okay, storytime easy, and there
we are.

Speaker 2 (18:11):
You'll have the entire.

Speaker 3 (18:12):
Catalog to browse through at your leisure. One night, he
called her the Demon, ranting about how much of an
idiot he was and how he knew he blew it
with her, that she'd never want to talk to him again,
et cetera.

Speaker 2 (18:24):
What did he do well?

Speaker 3 (18:25):
He was supposed to be going over to her house
and fell asleep and woke up at midnight. His new
girlfriend I'll call Ronda since she likes mma, was a
little niffed, but since she knew he had just gotten
off work, she joked that he hadn't blown it yet,
but if he stood her up again, she'd be at
his front door.

Speaker 4 (18:43):
Okay, so this is at least a better partner in
the better direction.

Speaker 2 (18:47):
That seems like. Yeah, a normal response with understanding and
a little bit of cheeky cheeky humor.

Speaker 4 (18:53):
There.

Speaker 3 (18:54):
There are a lot more stories of Shannon since again,
ten years of this mess, manipulation, lies and fake This
is we're normally her calling card for the dramatic situations
she'd wrote people into, normally ending it by twisting the
situation where she somehow became the victim.

Speaker 2 (19:09):
And that's the end of that story.

Speaker 3 (19:10):
Oho, OK, here's what I'll say, all right, ended on
like a decl What we're gonna say, right is that
the brother, the children, all the people who were impacted
mentally by her manipulations have sought therapy, all right, have
sought group counseling. I'm putting that out there. That's what
they were gonna do. The brother is still in a
great relationship now with Ronda. Yes, yes, And just a

(19:31):
warning again, if you just listen to this story and
you realize, oh, that kind of sounds like my partner,
but my partner's great, you have to re examine your relationship.

Speaker 6 (19:43):
I refuse to reconcile with my brother in law after
he said something hurtful.

Speaker 2 (19:47):
How hurtful?

Speaker 6 (19:48):
Let's find out My spouse and I have been together
for over ten years. We have a seven year old
girl and a four year old son. For the most part,
we've gotten along well with each other's family. My mother
in law has gone above and beyond to help with
the kid and helped me when I was dealing with
certain health issues. By the way, this comes from being
nice isn't hard. And if you want to submit your
own stories, go to the r slash Okay story time.

Speaker 5 (20:08):
I'll reredd it.

Speaker 6 (20:09):
So the following was something we didn't expect and makes
me feel uncomfortable of interacting with brother in law ever again,
brother in law got dumped during the holidays and was
feeling down at the start of January. He and my
husband have made a point of texting him often just
to check in on him, and it looks like he
was in better spirits, like around mid month and went
on what he called a great date with a former

(20:30):
coworker A few days after that, on a weekday, my
husband and me were playing a board game with our
kids while texting with my brother in law. My husband
first sent a voice note of our kids saying hello
to their uncle, and then a pick of me and
my kids huddled around the floor with the board in
the middle. My brother in law replied by saying only
you can turn a guarded tool into a housewife. My
husband immediately said he thought his brother might be drinking

(20:53):
or something.

Speaker 5 (20:53):
When he showed it to me.

Speaker 6 (20:55):
I was shocked at the sheer randomness of being insulted
like that.

Speaker 5 (20:58):
We didn't want to ruin the kids night.

Speaker 6 (21:00):
We agreed to talk to my brother in law later,
but in the meantime, my husband responded by saying that
wasn't funny and asking if he has a problem with
me or was trying to rile him up. Brother in
law just deleted it and didn't respond. Once the kids
were in their room and it was just us, my
husband tried to reach out to my brother in law,
but he ignored his calls and texts. He assured me
that his brother was feeling bad over it and probably

(21:20):
wasn't thinking when he said it, and he'd get things
cleared up soon enough. The day after, my husband tried
to figure out what had crawled up my brother in
law's butt, and somehow his explanation just made things worth
saying he was just jealous because I don't look like
a typical housewife, but I'm so good at it, and
how that picture reminded him of how far he is
from having a family of his own, and then he

(21:41):
doubled down on how out of place I.

Speaker 2 (21:44):
Looked, Oh, so he's moron.

Speaker 6 (21:45):
He's the moron, and he's jealous of the freaking baddie
that his brother got. The out of place comment was
in reference to me not having cleaned my dark lipstick off,
holding what looked like a cocktail drink just fruit juice,
and wearing a nice top while my kids were in
homier outfits. For context, we were playing freaking clue and
my husband and I had come back from having coffee

(22:07):
with friends, and I thought that I could role play
as socialite, so I didn't switch to something more comfy. That,
along with my shoulder back tattoo, meant I had no
business being in a comfy, cozy family picture. Apparently, brother
in law said over and over again how it was
a crappy joke, but I still felt like he had
or has some personal problem with me. My husband told

(22:28):
him to sort himself out and reach back when he
had a real apology. So then he contacted me, wrote
a whole paragraph saying how sorry he is and how
he hates how he's put his brother in awkward place,
and how I know that he respects and cares about
me and how I'm family. I told him I felt
that there was more to it, and I'd be willing
to forgive him, but first he had to be completely honest.

(22:49):
He replied by going on a weird tangent about how
I don't fit the profile of a regular great housewife
and how my husband is lucky. He got the best
of both worlds, and the more I asked for context,
the stranger and weirder it got. I didn't want him
in our house last week for my son's birthday, and
knowing that he just texted my brother how he'd promised
to take us all to a theme park when things

(23:09):
went back to normal. My husband told me that it's
been three weeks and how my brother in law has
apologized over a dozen times now and if we could
all just get along again. I told him he can't
dictate when I should forgive someone else, and that maybe
I never will. And my husband told me that that's
an overreaction over a few stupid comments that my brother
in law obviously didn't mean.

Speaker 5 (23:30):
But we do have an update.

Speaker 2 (23:31):
Oh WHOA.

Speaker 3 (23:32):
I agree that that completely cutting off the brother in
law with all the given context would be kind of unnecessary.

Speaker 2 (23:39):
I I agree.

Speaker 3 (23:40):
Swhack that he did that, but it's definitely not you're
I've never speaking to you again for as long as
I live type stuff.

Speaker 6 (23:46):
Yeah, and the fact that he apologized is definitely big.
I feel like a lot of people would double down. Yeah,
a lot of the stories that we've read, people just
double down. My mother in law texted my husband asking
questions about us excluding my brother in law for several
get togethers now the aforementioned and barbecue, and I told
my husband that he'd have to tell his mom.

Speaker 4 (24:03):
He told me he.

Speaker 6 (24:04):
Needed to talk to me first before explaining things to her.
I expected he'd tell me my brother in law had
told my mother in law his own distorted version, or
that we needed to be careful on how we explained
things to my mother in law. Instead, he told me
he had an inside joke years back with his brother
in law and a few friends about me being a
one night stand turned serious girlfriend and how it was stupid, immature,

(24:26):
and something he's embarrassed about now. He said that he
didn't even connect the dots when my brother in law
made the garden tool to housewife comment and it wasn't
until my brother in law spelled it out for him
in a later conversation. For weeks, he was hoping that
I'd either just forgive and forget because he didn't know
how to tell me. My first reaction was confusion. I
told my husband, why would you ever tell people that

(24:48):
if we were first friends and then dated we met
in college and didn't have our first date until over
a year later.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
He said he just.

Speaker 6 (24:55):
Wanted to impress his boys, and that he was a
stupid twenty something idiot. That just he made me ask
some more questions, like why wasn't his brother in high
school back then? Why would he even be telling his
teenage brother about made up college conquest. He said he
was just summing things up, but basically he told one
of his friends, who then told somebody else and it
reached his brother. Then he tried to further add to

(25:18):
that jumbled mess by saying that it was a running
joke that stopped when we became serious, and how it
was really about his friends rubing him instead of me.
I felt that he was just making this stuff up,
so I just shut the whole thing down and asked
him why he is so desperate to take the fall
for something that his brother said. I told him I'm
not out to get his brother or wish him ill.

(25:38):
I just wanted space. My husband stayed defensive and said
his brother will never say something like that again, and
that I'm making it sound like I'm afraid he'll hurt me.
This led to a senseless back and forth, with me
saying over and over again that I just wanted space
and him saying that it's been long enough and enough
time has passed for me to get over this. I
eventually snapped and said that if he's not going to

(26:00):
tell me what has him so desperate for his family
to not find out about his brother in law insulting
me and me wanting to be away from him, then
I'll just tell my in laws myself. He said that
he's telling the truth and that he just doesn't want
to give his mom an excuse to give his brother
more grief, as things between my brother in law and
his parents are apparently already tense. He said that he

(26:20):
understands that I'm angry, but asked me to please understand
that my brother in law is in a bad place
and doesn't want to uproot the only support that he has.
He then started crying, which I didn't expect, and said
that he feels like my brother in law is in
a worse place mentally than what any of us know,
and to please just be patient with him right now.
I didn't want to keep arguing after that, and agree
to just let him tell his mother whatever he wants

(26:42):
in the meantime, and that I don't have to speak
or be near my brother in law until I say so.
This was all on the car ride back to the
house earlier today, and we agreed to talk more about
this when we get some privacy. Right now, he's watching
TV with our kids while I'm in our room. In
like two hours, we'll go out to eat and probably
won't be in the mood for a heavy conversation later tonight,
which is fine, because right now my thoughts are all

(27:04):
over the place. I feel like there's some heavy secret
that I'm not privy to. I'm confused over how such
one stupid comment has now brought us here. If my
husband isn't lying, then he has some weird hang ups
and attachment to his brother that I had never ever
seen before. I just don't know what to think. WHOA Okay,
we've got another update, but I want to know.

Speaker 2 (27:22):
What you think, dude. I don't know. This is just
like too weird for me to even think anything.

Speaker 3 (27:26):
I think the brother is in a bad place, but
also he is acting really weird.

Speaker 2 (27:31):
I don't know. I need more information, which I think
will get in the next update.

Speaker 6 (27:35):
I kind of feel like maybe it is an overreaction.

Speaker 5 (27:39):
I don't know.

Speaker 6 (27:39):
I don't really like telling people, especially when it's ope.
Usually that like you're just you're just freaking out. You
gotta calm down. But she's saying like, I don't know
how this comment brought us here, but like to me,
it seems like you brought it here, you know.

Speaker 3 (27:51):
It seems like it was more like a principle where
it's like, well, he said this, and you can't tell
me when I can I'm okay with it.

Speaker 2 (27:57):
I can only tell you I'm okay with it, which
is fair.

Speaker 3 (28:00):
Then he's like, please just be okay with it faster
so that my family doesn't jump on him, like he's
you know, messing more stuff up. And then now he's
crying and I don't know, and you feel like, well,
now I feel like something else is going on because
you're acting so weird. Yeah, and it's just all a
bunch of nonsense.

Speaker 2 (28:16):
I a needy more information.

Speaker 6 (28:17):
Yeah, me too, But we do have an update. I've
been asked several times via comments and dms about an update,
but the rules of the subreddit is one update only,
so I'll just make one here.

Speaker 5 (28:27):
We started couple's therapy last Thursday.

Speaker 6 (28:29):
I have been the butt of many distasteful jokes between
my husband and his brother and more people. I feel betrayed, humiliated,
and of course angry, but at this point I'm just
looking for things to move on. I don't think divorce
is on the horizon, but some.

Speaker 5 (28:42):
Changes are needed.

Speaker 6 (28:43):
By the way, you can change from watching us to
listening to us on iHeartRadio, Spotify, Apple Podcast, what your
favorite podcast app is. We've got more episodes with full
stories just like this one. Let's go to Okay storytime.

Speaker 3 (28:55):
I like that there's no divorce in the horizon, but yeah,
things need to be changes be made.

Speaker 6 (29:00):
Blad they're working it out and it definitely is more understandable.
She's mad that, like, this isn't just one comment. This
is like so many other jokes that are like why
would you even forever?

Speaker 3 (29:11):
It was like a pretend joke where it was like, oh,
your one night stand that you turned into your wife,
which is like he's like, no, babe, that's more they're
ribbing me. It's like, yeah, they're ribbing you, and it's
about your wife, Like, yeah, it's still involved. Right.

Speaker 6 (29:23):
In regards to my mother in law, I did tell
her about why I'm avoiding my brother in law and
she apologized on his behalf and said that she understood.
In regards to my mother in law and brother in law,
their issues are regarding money and have nothing to do
with me. My mother in law finding out about this
drama just gave her another reason to be upset at
my brother in law. My husband's excuse for being such
a pig is because of feeling insecure, which blah. But

(29:46):
I will give couples therapy an honest tribe, and so
far he seems to be trying to be better.

Speaker 5 (29:51):
So let's see where.

Speaker 2 (29:52):
That takes us.

Speaker 5 (29:52):
And that is the end of that.

Speaker 6 (29:54):
The best stories always end in communication and couples therapy.

Speaker 3 (29:57):
Yes really, John here og host, We're gonna get back
to these stories, but a quick three minute break from
as from our sponsors.

Speaker 7 (30:05):
My friend lied about us having an affair my boyfriend
refused to believe me.

Speaker 2 (30:09):
With friends like these, who needs enemies.

Speaker 7 (30:12):
I want to start off by saying that I realize
how messed up a situation this is, and I understand
why my boyfriend would be upset and even suspicious, but
I can't believe he doesn't trust me. By the way,
this comes from going crazy one, two, three, four, five, six,
And if you want to spit your own stories, go
to the r slash Okay storytime suppered it.

Speaker 6 (30:30):
So.

Speaker 7 (30:31):
I've been with my boyfriend Paul for three years. In
the beginning of our relationship, Paul had some issues with trust.
He had been cheated on in the past. I made
it clear right away that I had never cheated on anyone,
that I would not, and that I understood if he
had trust issues from the past, but that it was
a deal breaker for me to be with someone who

(30:51):
couldn't trust me. Yeas since those early days, been really
good about it. Throughout our three years together, I think
I have earned his trust. I've always been honest with
him and never cheated on him. He's asked to see
conversations of mine that I've had with male friends twice
over those three years, and I've obliged. The second time. However,
I made it clear to him that I was very

(31:12):
unhappy to be treated as though I was acting suspiciously
and did not deserve privacy with my friends when he
had no reason at all to think I was being shady.
I said that if he didn't trust me because of
something I have said or done, I was one hundred
percent happy to have a conversation about that, to discuss
it and to address any issues he had. But if
I had done literally nothing to cast suspicion, then I

(31:35):
expected him to trust me.

Speaker 5 (31:36):
Good on you, Opie.

Speaker 7 (31:38):
He agreed with me, said that I had done nothing wrong,
and never asked again. One of those conversations he asked
about was with my friend Roger. Roger had two years
before I started dating Paul, confessed feelings of love for me.
I told him I wasn't interested, and that was that.
By the time I was seeing Paul, I had absolutely

(31:58):
no reason to think things were anything but platonic between
Roger and myself. A week ago, Roger and I got
together for coffee.

Speaker 5 (32:05):
Again.

Speaker 7 (32:05):
I want to stress that before this happened, I had
literally no reason at all to think that any of
those feelings. Still at the cafe, Roger suddenly went on
this impassioned monologue about how much he still left me,
how Paul was a terrible boyfriend and now I should
dump him and be with Roger, how loyal Roger was,
how perfect we were together.

Speaker 2 (32:25):
Excily.

Speaker 7 (32:27):
I was pretty much silent through this whole speech because
I was so surprised and uncomfortable. But when he stopped,
I told him, probably not as strong as I should have,
but I didn't know what to do, that I love Paul,
that I was absolutely not leaving Paul, and that I
needed to go home immediately. I was shaken up by
the whole thing, so I took my time getting home
to calm down. By that time I got home, I

(32:50):
found that Roger had sent a long, utterly insane Facebook
message to Paul, detailing how much he loved me, that
we were destined to be together, and heavily implying but
not outright, stating, Roger and I had been carrying on
an affair for weeks.

Speaker 2 (33:04):
Ikes, well, dikes, that's one way to do that.

Speaker 7 (33:08):
I don't know why he did this. I have no explanation.
Paul believes it completely. He has listened to my explanation
of things, but things I'm lying. He doesn't want to
see me or talk to me at all anymore. I'm
completely devastated that Paul would believe this Facebook message over me.
I'm horrified that my relationship with him has ended like this.
I'm embarrassed that now I'm being seen as a cheater

(33:29):
and a salute who slept around on Paul. I'm utterly
eight full towards Roger. It's very frustrating to have your
boyfriend Paul, who again like it seemingly it's because of
his past experiences, but to not like there's you could
be like, oh, I have all I'm assuming you were,
like I can show you on my phone, Like there's
no proof of this at all.

Speaker 3 (33:49):
He's lying one snippet of real advice because we've had
stories like this, and it's like, when something like this
happens and you're in a relationship.

Speaker 2 (33:56):
You need to immediately talk about it that day.

Speaker 3 (33:58):
Yeah, well I think you do. Oh I know, because
it's like, now right, that was the problem. You won't
believe what just happened to me at the coffee shop. Absolutely,
it's an immediate communication of like, yo, I do think it.

Speaker 7 (34:14):
Was like within an hour or two, you know. I
think she was like, whoa, it just happened. And then
she gets home and he's like.

Speaker 5 (34:20):
I just got this Facebook message.

Speaker 3 (34:21):
Oh I did. I interpreted that there was like a gap,
but I know we could not.

Speaker 7 (34:26):
Have been I know, the same day, because she said
I just took a little bit longer getting home because
I was like shocked, it's been a week and I
can't convince Paul to talk to me. I know, Yeah,
those trust issues in the past, but I really believe
we were long past them. Comments Coming one says maybe
a little late for now, but what you should have
done was call the crazy friend while you were with
trust issue boyfriend, have the phone on speaker and ask

(34:48):
him why on earth he would lie to your boyfriend
like that. Comment two says, I think your answer is
kind of nested in what you wrote. You find it
a deal breaker if someone is unable to trust you
your boyfriend in the context of my word versus their situation,
without there being any evidence besides Roger's word to suggest
you were cheating, and with a set against your stated
position that you haven't ever done so, has chosen to

(35:09):
believe someone else over you. It seems he does not
trust you, and you've just said yourself what you decided.
The consequences of that would be. That is true. That
is what you said. If you can't trust me, then
we can't be together and he can't trust you.

Speaker 2 (35:24):
So I guess we can't beat it again.

Speaker 7 (35:26):
So yeah, that's pretty set game, set match done.

Speaker 2 (35:29):
Answered your own question.

Speaker 7 (35:30):
Opie says, I didn't think of it this way until
you put it so clearly. I guess you're right. Even
if I spoke to Paul now, I would always remember
that he didn't believe me or trust me. I'd always
be scared of it happening again. Comment three says none
of this is your fault. Your friend is nutty. However,
I think the lesson year is when a friend declares
feelings for you, it is smarter not to maintain that relationship.

(35:53):
Everybody is not as weird as your friend, who I
hope you are now not speaking to, but it is
at least awkward.

Speaker 2 (36:00):
Well, I disagree with that.

Speaker 7 (36:01):
I don't think it's always like if someone declares feelings.
I don't think it's always the end of the friendship.

Speaker 3 (36:06):
It should be the end of this friendship. It should
have been the friendship.

Speaker 7 (36:10):
Yes, I don't think you can do much of anything
except hope Paul will come around. Opie says, I haven't
had any contact at all with Roger, and I don't
think I could ever forgive him. I mean, why would you.
He Not only did he, you know, lie and say
I don't even know, Like it's not that he like
reached out to your boyfriend and said, oh, I'm in

(36:30):
love with your girlfriend, he also implied that you had
been sleeping together, which is so disgusting to me.

Speaker 3 (36:37):
Well, it's just the whole nature of the lies discussed
from a gross He's just very place of deceit and
this like fatuation, yeah, and just illusion when you get
someoney in your life like this who like confesses all
these big feelings.

Speaker 2 (36:51):
I do agree with you when you.

Speaker 3 (36:52):
Say, like it doesn't have to be the end of connection,
you know, period, but like moving forward, you really do
have to have like you gotta like really attune your
like your radar bs radar.

Speaker 7 (37:07):
Absolutely, I mean you should be adjusting how you interact
with them, I think. And also I think there is
a difference between confessing feelings like a crush and confessing
love because love is a big emotion. Weirdly enough, Roger
is not at all attempted to contact me since this happened.
He sent that Facebook message to Paul and now has

(37:29):
gone totally silent and not attempted to contact either me
or Paul. That's because it was the If I can't
have you, no one can, right. He wanted to get
revenge on you because you rejected him and he's a
piece of trash. Common for says, so this guy professed
his love and you kept him around the last few years.
Do you keep any of these other men hovering around you,
waiting for their chance. I don't blame your boyfriend. I

(37:51):
don't like this comment. If I got that message, it
would take a lot of convincing that it wasn't true.
For someone to confess to an affair that didn't happen
is quite rare. And even if Andrew, I'd be mad
that I had to be involved in spillover trauma from
your friends.

Speaker 2 (38:06):
Yeah, this is a guy who likes to do like I'd.

Speaker 7 (38:08):
Be mad if someone crazy was being crazy towards you,
and then they also.

Speaker 5 (38:12):
Work crazy towards me.

Speaker 2 (38:13):
Eally, what the heck?

Speaker 7 (38:14):
Why do you involve me in her drama update though,
do you have any thoughts before we uh.

Speaker 5 (38:20):
Scoot in there?

Speaker 3 (38:21):
Yeah, I mean, I think regardless of like and we've
already we already said that it was like Roger through
the ranching here, But it is just showing you that,
like the partner that you're with, Paul, he's not in.

Speaker 2 (38:34):
A place where he can trust you.

Speaker 3 (38:35):
Yeah, and if that's a prerequisite of y'all being together,
well now you've realized you guys aren't really know mental
to be dating right now anyway. Yeah, so in a
way you almost have to chalk it up to just
be like, thanks Universe, you know whatever.

Speaker 7 (38:49):
Given me a sign after three years he doesn't trust me.
But anyway, there's an update. I want to thank everyone
so much for commenting. Before I post what happened. I
just want to address a few things that I didn't
get to in the first post. First, Paul knew I
was having coffee with Roger. It wasn't some kind of
secret thing. Paul's female friends. He has lunch or coffee
with the loan too, so this isn't unusual in our relationship. Second,

(39:12):
Paul did not know that Roger had said he loved
me five years ago.

Speaker 5 (39:17):
I definitely made.

Speaker 7 (39:18):
A mistake not telling him that, But honestly, it was
so long ago, and to my obviously wrong knowledge was
old history. We did not extensively discuss our past, so
there wasn't really a natural point where it would have
come up, and it just never occurred to me to
say anything. I mean, honestly, yeah, I kind of like
if it was like a one time thing, right, I
kind of I understand that.

Speaker 3 (39:38):
Yeah, I'm never going to be no relationship. I'm never
going to be like, hey, so here's every person who's
ever told me.

Speaker 2 (39:44):
They love me. There would be so many people, do
you want it alphabetical?

Speaker 7 (39:47):
Finally, Roger and I did not have a particularly intense friendship.
It's not like we were texting constantly our best buddies.
We hung out occasionally and would be in touch if
something relevant came up, but we didn't just jat randomly anyway.
With that up being said, I took the advice of
some redditors, and when I was a little calmer, I
Facebook messaged Roger asking him why he lied. He responded

(40:09):
with what do you mean, at which point I started
pressing him harder. He responded only with one word answers
and honestly didn't reply to most of my messages at all.
No matter how much I asked, he never actually said
any definitive statement of yes, I lied for such and
such reason. Finally I sent him a definitive statement that
said I had never had an affair with him, that

(40:29):
I was incredibly hurt and angry that our friendship was over,
and that he was never to contact me again. He replied, okay,
and that was that. I sent the entire Facebook conversation
to Paul, not thinking it would help save us, but
just to try and clear my name, which is fair.
I mean, like, even if you don't want to be
with Paul anymore, I wouldn't want by like an X
of mine to be like, yeah, she cheated on me

(40:51):
like that. That's it's not a good look. In the message,
I asked him if Roger's reactions to my questions and
my response to Roger was in line with what he
would DOATPEC if Roger's accusations were true. Paul didn't respond
that day, but the next day he called me. Paul
basically said that the more he thought about it, the
more he believed me, and that the conversation between Roger

(41:12):
and I helped him believe that that Roger's responses didn't
make sense and that he now thought nothing had gone
on too late. Oh, however, he said, despite that, the
trust was broken between us and he couldn't bet with me.
I got pretty mad and yelled at him, asking why
I was being punished for nothing, and he just basically disengaged.

Speaker 5 (41:30):
From the discussion.

Speaker 3 (41:31):
But being punished, you got to say, thank you, Universe.
Ye're not having me waste more of my time.

Speaker 7 (41:37):
This is not a punishment. This is a you are
being saved from this pause.

Speaker 2 (41:41):
It feels like one, but in reality.

Speaker 7 (41:43):
It's just not not my finest moment. I know. I
was just so overwhelmed with frustration. We did eventually end
the conversation calmly, if not amiably, and he is dropping
off the stuff that I had left at his apartment
later this week.

Speaker 5 (41:56):
But you can drop yourself off.

Speaker 7 (41:57):
To listen to full episodes of stories just like this,
just go to Spotify, Apple Podcast, or iHeartRadio and search
a focus story time. But there's a wee bit left
to the story.

Speaker 5 (42:08):
Do you have any final thoughts?

Speaker 2 (42:10):
Don't jump to conclusions.

Speaker 3 (42:12):
Don't jump to conclusions, gather you evidence. I'm probably calling
the guy accusing, right, Yeah, Like, if I'm Paul and
I'm nervous, I'm gonna be like, all right, let me
see how tight this guy's story is.

Speaker 7 (42:29):
Yeah, okay, when did it start? When did But it
seems like he just kind of I don't know if
Paul tried to message him back, but it seems to go.
He said that he just kind of stopped talking to
both both.

Speaker 3 (42:38):
I mean, of course, but I'm just saying, if I'm
in a situation where it's like and no, I'm presented
with this information, yeah, I'm going to the person accusing, yeah,
and saying that if they're like involved with it, so
when it happened, like what is that?

Speaker 2 (42:48):
Blah blah blah, Like what does their right butt cheek
look like?

Speaker 7 (42:51):
That's what I was thinking. Actually do they have a
mole on their butt?

Speaker 2 (42:55):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (42:55):
Anyway, there's a different there's a bunch of different ways
you can go about that. That's what I do before
being like gross, I'm leaving it and not talking to
either of them.

Speaker 5 (43:05):
I learned my lesson.

Speaker 7 (43:07):
Not only will any declaration of interest by a friend
and that friendship forever, but I will never date someone
who has trusted issues or a history of being cheated
on again. I'm sure I come across as a little
bitter about this, but I honestly feel like there was
absolutely no point to my fidelity and honesty during those
three years.

Speaker 5 (43:24):
Of course, there's a point.

Speaker 7 (43:26):
You were a good person, you were a good partner.

Speaker 2 (43:28):
Opi is so confused about this. She's like, damn, should
I have just been cheating on him?

Speaker 5 (43:33):
It's like, no, of course not.

Speaker 2 (43:34):
Maybe I should cheat on my mate.

Speaker 7 (43:36):
I got treated like a cheater whether or not I cheated,
and both Paul and I ended up hurt and alone
despite being one hundred percent faith. That's right, your fault
for being like honest in a relationship.

Speaker 2 (43:45):
That's Paul.

Speaker 7 (43:46):
Better to end up alone or stick to friends with
benefits than end up investing in another three years in a
relationship to have this be the conclusion. Wow, Opie is
in her fields.

Speaker 2 (43:56):
Seti Seddi, no, no, no.

Speaker 5 (43:59):
This is not the take way. Paul sucks.

Speaker 7 (44:02):
The takeaway is not that your relationships are always going
to be like this and that you should just cheat.

Speaker 2 (44:06):
That's not the tationship. The answer to this is cheat,
no wrong, wrong, wrong answer. You're you're right.

Speaker 3 (44:15):
You should cheat on every man and make sure don't
date any guys who have trust issues already, because you'd
be wasting your time. You should be giving trust issues
to the people who don't have their meal.

Speaker 2 (44:28):
No, people, come.

Speaker 3 (44:29):
On, no, no, don't do that. That's all jokey, jokes, jokes. Yeah,
and I don't ever like the respect. Well, I guess
I'll never date a guy who has been cheated on
her has trust issues again.

Speaker 2 (44:41):
Or it's like, I guess I'll never do that. It's like,
stop doing black and white stuff.

Speaker 3 (44:45):
Everything in life lives in the gray area between black
and white.

Speaker 5 (44:49):
Yeah, place, there are.

Speaker 7 (44:50):
Going to be some people that like, have very deep
trust issues that probably aren't ready for a relationship in general.

Speaker 1 (44:57):
Sam, here og host, we're gonna get back to these stores.
But here's three minutes fads from our sponsors.

Speaker 3 (45:02):
First, my fiance wants to take a week long vacation
with her ex. I refused, Well, she could just be
your X too. Yeah, that's x'es all around. Yeah, I'm
not sure if this makes me an a hole or what.
I'm sure jealousy and insecurities are right up there, but
right now my head is spinning. I feel nauseated, and

(45:23):
I feel trapped because no matter how I respond, I
have a feeling this is going to blow up in
my face. By the way, this comes from user give
Up twenty three. If you want to submit your own stories,
go to the r slash show Okay storytime subreddit. So
my fiance was married before for four years and they
had a son together who is a special needs child.
I love the little guy, but I also understand that

(45:46):
I'm not the dad here and he is very involved
in his life. From my understanding of the divorce, my
fiance is the cause of it, and this was against
the ex's wishes. Because of their son, they are in
constant contact with one another share joint custody. I've learned
to live with that. He and I certainly don't love
one another, but it's as cordial as it can be

(46:07):
when the two of us are ever in a room together.
Long story short. She informs me this week that he
has found a specialist to look at their son's condition
and he wants them to all go at his expense
for a consultation. No big deal, right, And if that
were the end of it, I would be fine. However,
instead of an overnight or even a couple of day trip,

(46:29):
he wants it to be a week's long vacation where
they will take their son to the specialist, but then
to an amusement park that's close by and a zoo
and shopping and well anything else you would do on
a vacation.

Speaker 7 (46:41):
Okay, so added information they have a child together. That
does add a little in context.

Speaker 2 (46:48):
It's not me a child, they have a kid, very involved.

Speaker 5 (46:51):
Yeah, it's a little bit different.

Speaker 2 (46:52):
They're making a core memory for their kid.

Speaker 5 (46:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 7 (46:55):
I don't think this is anything that I would necessarily,
you know, they're not presumably they're not sharing a room.

Speaker 3 (47:00):
But regardless, if she does this and then she comes
back and she's like, I can't do this, guess what.

Speaker 2 (47:04):
It was never gonna work anyway.

Speaker 5 (47:05):
Yeah, exactly exactly.

Speaker 3 (47:07):
They'll be sharing a room to save expenses. She's asking
me if I would have a problem with any of this.
I basically bit my lip and said that whatever was
best for their son, I was all for it.

Speaker 2 (47:18):
I know she knew I was forcing that.

Speaker 3 (47:19):
So she said she wanted me to think for a
couple of days about it, but that she did want
to go.

Speaker 7 (47:24):
I think the only thing, the only thing that would
be reasonable for Opee to say here is like, Cat,
I don't really want you guys to share expenses. I mean, sorry,
I share a room and like, hey, I'll like help
cover the cost if that's a worry here. But that's
the only thing that I would be like, yeah, that's fair.
If he's uncomfortable with that, here's my problem.

Speaker 2 (47:43):
In my heart, I'm not okay with it.

Speaker 3 (47:44):
I would have no problem if they went for the consultation,
and while I wouldn't be happy about it. I could
even force myself to live with the one hotel room
for one night, but a week's vacation that is just
too much for me. I know I should trust her,
and I do, but I know this guy never wanted
the divorce. She doesn't hate him and has even said
in the past she feels bad for him because she's

(48:04):
the one who changed and left their marriage. In a
week's time with their entire family unit together, crap can
happen if nothing else. I'm afraid it's going to confuse
the son into thinking mom and dad are back together.
Somebody helped me out here? Am I just being an
insecure jack? Booty and should I just be okay with this?
I know that's what I'm supposed to say and do,

(48:26):
but I'm not gonna lie. No matter what I say,
I'm going to be miserable, and I hate that. I
feel like if I say my true feelings, everyone's going
to be pissed at me for being the jealous boyfriend.
But if I give my blessing, I'll spend the entire
week miserable and honestly the next few weeks probably being
overly cautious in questioning whether or not anything happened.

Speaker 7 (48:45):
I mean, like, just express those feelings. You can't tell
her to not go, but you can say that you know, hey,
I'm a little bit uncomfortable. If you do on this trip,
it would make me, you know, feel a bit more
out of ease. If you had texted me updates, if
you said what you guys were up to, if you
chipped in a little bit more to not sleep in
the same room, like you know, there are ways that

(49:06):
you can express these insecurities without being controlling.

Speaker 3 (49:10):
If this is how you're really feeling, you need to
be like, all right, go on this week long trip
with your ex husband, right, go on it?

Speaker 2 (49:18):
Stay in the same room.

Speaker 3 (49:20):
If you start feeling like you want to that you're
a love this guy and you want to get back
with this guy, own that and let's break it off.
I'm fully open to whatever honest truth you're experiencing, because
I'm not going to marry you. If you're still in
love with your ex, that's and that's the what a

(49:41):
great way to find out if that's the case.

Speaker 2 (49:43):
Doing this for a.

Speaker 7 (49:44):
Week if you necessarily should say that prior. But yeah,
but the con conceptually.

Speaker 2 (49:49):
Well, that's where he's already at.

Speaker 3 (49:50):
Yeah, I'm gonna be miserable for a week, and I'm
gonna question whether anything happened. It's like, dude, you fully
don't trust your fiance. You're fully worried she would leave
you for this guy.

Speaker 7 (49:59):
So you just need to express some of those I
think you can express your insecurities in a healthy way
that does not come off as controlling or accusing her
of anything.

Speaker 3 (50:08):
I don't want this guy sleeping in the same room
as my fiance because he did it for years when
they were married. In dating, trusting someone's a lot harder
to do in real life than it is in theory.

Speaker 5 (50:17):
Of course, that is but that's like part of a relationship.

Speaker 2 (50:19):
And we have some comments here. Number one, you're gonna
be this kid's stepfather for the rest of his life.

Speaker 3 (50:25):
Every time he interacts with his mother, he's going to
be interacting with you. All this to say, if this
is a family vacation, then guess what, You're part of
the family and you should go too. The four of
you will have a great if slightly awkward at moments time.

Speaker 2 (50:38):
And she really shouldn't object.

Speaker 3 (50:40):
If you were just the boyfriend, that would be different,
and you going might be a little weird, But if
you're engaged to be married and aren't actually serious about it,
that weirdness needs to be outside your marriage, not inside it.
It's you and her and her son, and then it's
everyone else.

Speaker 7 (50:55):
The only thing that I would say for that one,
I do because he special needs, there might be a
little bit more complexity in that. Hopefully he's comfortable with ope,
but we like don't know what that situation is, so
not really we really don't know. Maybe he is comfortable
and it would be fine, but I think it's something
you could ask.

Speaker 3 (51:14):
If she refuses and vault and is valuing her ex's
feelings over yours. You need to stop and consider how
you will feel if that continues for the next twenty years.
Comment number two says, tell her what you told us.
If she even asked you how you felt about it
and then you lied, your opinion counts. Tell her how
you feel. Opie says, I don't feel like I lied

(51:36):
as much as I forced out an answer that I
thought I was supposed to say, which is just contry.

Speaker 7 (51:42):
Dummy, which was contrary to what you were feeling.

Speaker 2 (51:44):
Yeah, I'm not sure if.

Speaker 3 (51:45):
I lied so much as said something I wasn't that believing.
I know it's semantics, but that's where my head is. Anyway,
she's looking for my approval. I can just tell by
the way she's asking and what she has said. I
think if I make it clear I'm not happy, she
won't go. But then I fear long term resentment on
her end. And here's an update, folks, I'm sticking to.

Speaker 2 (52:06):
My theory here, dude.

Speaker 3 (52:08):
I'm saying, if I was really getting if I was engaged,
if I'm getting married to somebody, right, if I'm already like,
all right, let's do this.

Speaker 2 (52:15):
I'm not worried about your exes. You serious, I'm gonna
marry you.

Speaker 5 (52:19):
It's like, if you want it, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (52:21):
I'm already not cheat.

Speaker 5 (52:23):
So it wants to be with the ax. They're gonna
be with their acts.

Speaker 2 (52:25):
If you're really if.

Speaker 3 (52:26):
Your position is like, oh, I'm worried that like something
could get rekindled from this trip, then you actually have
to do the horrifying, scary thing and going, hey, go
on that trip. Yeah, you know, I'm not gonna tell
you how to be. Yeah, I think you can tell
her where you're at. You'd be like, I'm worried it might,
but you know what, if it does, I'm not gonna

(52:47):
hate you about it. I'm not gonna just let's be real.
Tell me what happens, if it happens. Thank God, right, yes,
it's good. Good it happens now instead of later. Let's
get to this update, folks. We still got plenty story left.
She came to me today and asked me again about going,
and I took everyone's advice, gathered up my courage, and
in a calm and relaxed manner, decided to share my

(53:08):
feelings with her. She calmly agreed with me that it
was very unusual and really felt like nothing bad was
going to occur, but since she loved me and respected
my opinion, she was only going to go for the
consultation and then return.

Speaker 5 (53:20):
And there you go.

Speaker 7 (53:21):
You expressed, you communicate it. You told her your insecurities
without accusing of her of anything, and.

Speaker 5 (53:26):
It worked out.

Speaker 2 (53:27):
Yay Ooh yeah, that's the way I wish, you know what?

Speaker 3 (53:32):
What? For f's sake, this blew up bigger than a
god dang Adam Baum with all the ependrama reserve for
reality TV. She asks me and I sit down and
start to give her my thoughts on the subject. Now,
mind you, Right out of the gate, I said that
I trusted her and did not believe anything would happen.

(53:54):
But immediately I could see her tense up for a fight,
and I didn't even get to finish my well crafted
speech before she called me an immature child, a control
freak in an a hole, not necessarily in that order.

Speaker 5 (54:07):
I don't trust her anymore.

Speaker 2 (54:09):
Yeah, this is making me a little suspicious.

Speaker 5 (54:13):
That's a pretty suspicious reaction.

Speaker 3 (54:15):
We can only venture how these things were said. Anyways,
She rotated between telling me she was just going to
cancel the entire thing to telling me to kiss her butt,
she would do as she pleased. I mean, she went
on for what must have been a half hour, but
it seemed like three days. The fact that I said
I trusted her seemed to make it worse, because if
I trusted her, then this shouldn't even have been an issue.

(54:37):
I asked about going, and she said it wasn't either
of our places to decide that because her ex was
paying for everything, which I then brought up how uncomfortable
I was with that. Of course, she threw her special
needs son in my face, which I kept explaining over
and over how I wanted them to get the consultation
and I wanted her to be there for that, but
I just wasn't cool with the entire vacation plan. She

(54:58):
did not understand why, and since I couldn't articulate anything
other than it made me feel disrespected and uneasy, she
decided that I was insecure and controlling. She kept asking
me if I thought she was going to have spicy
sleep with him with their child right there in the
room with them. I said, of course not. But it
wasn't just the spicy tango that was bothering me. I

(55:20):
admitted that jealousy had reared its ugly head. But I
asked her how she would feel if I went on
a week long vacation with my secretary for me.

Speaker 7 (55:27):
Well, oh yeah, that's different. That's not a one to one.

Speaker 2 (55:29):
Yeah. Well you might have just made it worse, buddy.

Speaker 3 (55:33):
Yeah, that was even worse because now she started accusing
me of wanting to have spicy sleep with my secretary.

Speaker 2 (55:39):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (55:40):
You played yourself there, buddy. I just basically said, to
do what you want to do. I'm sorry I feel
this way. I probably shouldn't have said anything, but I
felt by staying silent, I would have ended up hating myself.
She said her son comes first, which I immediately said
is fine, and that while she has no feelings for
her ex romantically, she does care about him as a
person and as the father of her son, so she

(56:02):
wasn't going to disrespect him by bringing up this nonsense
to him.

Speaker 2 (56:05):
Hey, huge red flag. What are we talking about? Her?
Acting like this is like the most ridiculous thing?

Speaker 5 (56:12):
Is now like major projection?

Speaker 2 (56:15):
You're so suspicious?

Speaker 7 (56:16):
Yeah, I'd be like, oh yeah, I really don't.

Speaker 5 (56:19):
Trust you now?

Speaker 2 (56:20):
Oh yeah yeai.

Speaker 3 (56:21):
She said my entire thought pattern was an insult to
her and she does not know where this leaves us.
I basically said that I was done dogging with her
for the day because after that I might say things
that I couldn't take back and needed time to think,
so I'm left. About an hour later, I got this
text quote, I can't believe you are throwing us away
over something so stupid. I replied back with I didn't

(56:43):
know I threw away anything, and she did not reply.

Speaker 2 (56:46):
I'm not sure where we stand.

Speaker 5 (56:48):
That's not like she's breaking up with the dude.

Speaker 2 (56:51):
I'd break up with her anyway.

Speaker 5 (56:52):
This is like whoa.

Speaker 2 (56:53):
This is an answer to the question in and of itself.

Speaker 7 (56:56):
It at the very least shows you that even if
she's not even if she hasn't betrayed you or cheated
or anything, she's still proving that you guys are not
ready to get married. If this is how she handles
any sort of like pushback against her, her plans or
her actions, and she just gets mad at you and
yells at you and gets defensive, like that's not the

(57:18):
way that you want to start your marriage.

Speaker 3 (57:20):
Correct, Well, you've now got a much bigger problem than
just the vacation. Your fiance is a terrible communicator who
uses multiple manipulation tactics like straw man arguments, belittling you personally,
name calling, dominating the conversation, passive aggressive text, and imply
you're the reason the marriage is off when she's the
one threatening to end it and she won't consider or

(57:42):
even listen to your feelings.

Speaker 2 (57:44):
That is not someone who can have a successful marriage.

Speaker 3 (57:47):
Seriously, there's no way someone who is that bad at
communicating and that unwilling to respect her partner's feelings can
be a good wife or husband if the genders were reversed.
Do not move forward on this marriage until you've seen
a relationship counselor from multiple sessions, and you've seen concrete
proof that her ability to deal with the conflict has changed.
Marriage is full of compromise and disagreements, and right now

(58:08):
she can't handle either without resorting to blame, throwing an aim,
calling and threats. Anyway, there is another update, let's get
into it. So, after I sent my text to her,
she never replied, I decided that no answer was my
answer and just accepted that she was going to do
whatever she wanted and I would take that long weekend
to decide whether or not I could live like this.

(58:29):
It took me all of twenty minutes of self talking. Yeah,
apparently I'm crazy because I talked to myself. I just
decided that the last text would just serve as the
last text.

Speaker 2 (58:42):
Didn't work out that way though.

Speaker 3 (58:44):
Sure Enough, last night she texted me again and said, quote, well,
are you gonna come over and talk about this? I
just replied back with there's really nothing to talk about.
You've made your decision clear and it's your choice. She
replies with, so you're okay with this? I was stunned.
She honestly thought that me saying this was me approving

(59:05):
of this. I was stunned. She honestly thought that me
saying this was me approving of this. I'll paraphrase what
I wrote to her because it was quite lengthy, but
in essence, I told her that no, I was not
okay with this. However, since we were now no longer together,
she's free to do what she wanted to do. She
does not reply. However, ten minutes later, there's a knocking

(59:26):
on my door with her son in tow At first
I didn't think i'd answer the door, but I could
tell she was getting more more frantic knocking, so I
was afraid she was going to cause a scene with
my neighbors, so I opened the door. She's almost hyperventilating
when she starts talking to me and begins bawling like
a baby girl.

Speaker 2 (59:43):
Do you not remember breaking up with me unless you.

Speaker 7 (59:46):
Brought your son to like have a meltdown. I understand
why you couldn't. Maybe you couldn't leave your son at home,
but like you're gonna have a meltdown from your son.

Speaker 3 (59:54):
This is again, just like from the very beginning, This
is just all the proof you needed where it's like, dang,
I'm so glad we did not get married because clearly
we were not ready.

Speaker 5 (01:00:02):
Yep. Absolutely.

Speaker 3 (01:00:04):
I take her son and go put on the Cartoon
Network in the other room and let him watch cartoons
while I try to get her to calm down. She
starts begging and pleading and being the exact opposite of
what she was the other night. I just simply tell
her that she has emotional issues that she needs to
get help with and that I couldn't help her. We
talked for a long time, and I wasn't really what

(01:00:27):
you would say mean to her, but I wasn't backing
down either, and I simply told her that her response
to me was unacceptable, that even if I ever agreed
to her going on a trip like this, her actions
during that argument degraded me as a person and made
it very clear to me that my opinions were of
little to no importance to her. I kind of stopped

(01:00:47):
because physically she looked to beat down. That is a
figure of speech, by the way, I never once touched her,
nor would I. We went to check on her son
and he had fallen asleep, so she came back laid
on the couch for a few minutes. The next thing
I know, she's up on me, trying to initiate spicy sleeps.

Speaker 2 (01:01:04):
Just like, girl, go get your own issues checked out.

Speaker 5 (01:01:08):
Man, you started this, Man, you started this.

Speaker 2 (01:01:11):
I'm going back. I want to get her exact quote here.

Speaker 3 (01:01:13):
She said her son comes first, when I said that's fine,
umm mm hmmm. And then she's like, I'm not even
gonna bring this up because that would be disrespectful to
my ex. She said, my entire thought pattern was an insult,
and she does not know where this leaves us. So
she was actually the one who said, you're breaking up
with you right now, exactly, and.

Speaker 7 (01:01:33):
He said what I am, and then she didn't reply.

Speaker 3 (01:01:36):
I never responded, so she immediately she was the one
who was like and now this is what has happened.
We have broken up. I tell her that the initiation
of Spicy Sleep isn't going to change things, and I
still feel that we are best separated. I probably should
not have done it, but to answer some questions from
the other post, yes, she is hot as the lake.

(01:02:00):
So they do the horizontal mambo. After the the horizontal
mambo is completed, I still tell her I don't think
this should change things. She begs me to give her
another chance, and that today she's going to call her
ex and tell him what's going to happen.

Speaker 2 (01:02:15):
They leave.

Speaker 3 (01:02:16):
About two hours ago, I get a call from the X.
He said that she told him to call me and
tell me what's going on. She now is only going
for the one night to stay for the consultation and
they have their own rooms. I told him that I
was sorry she dragged him into our mess. He said
it's no big deal to him, which I didn't believe
for a second. Then she calls me to make sure

(01:02:38):
he called. She's all filled with love of enjoy and apologies.
And right now I'm confused because I think she may
be bipolar or whatever the heck else it is when
you change personality so quick. I told her to come
over later, and I'm going to make part of my
stipulations for staying together to be that she starts going
to counseling.

Speaker 2 (01:02:54):
Not really sure where I go from here.

Speaker 3 (01:02:56):
I don't know if me putting my foot down calls
her to flip or if she's just legitimately crazy.

Speaker 2 (01:03:01):
We will see where this goes, and there's an edit.

Speaker 3 (01:03:04):
I think it's important to point this out to everyone
because honestly, I've portrayed her as a one dimensional nut job. Honestly,
she's not. This is our first real, true fight. You've
had disagreements before, but never has she flipped out like this.
I'm sorry, you're engaged to someone you never had a
real fight with.

Speaker 7 (01:03:22):
Some people never have real fights with their partners.

Speaker 2 (01:03:25):
I feel like that's like a prerequisite to getting engaged.

Speaker 7 (01:03:28):
I think some people are really really good at like conversations,
or some people are really bad at conversations, and so
they never actually bring up.

Speaker 2 (01:03:35):
Well, see, that's that's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 3 (01:03:37):
It's like, if you're actually gonna be married to somebody, like,
you can't be in a position where you're like, well,
I don't want to say that because it might just
set them.

Speaker 2 (01:03:44):
You need to already be ready to like.

Speaker 3 (01:03:46):
All right, I'm not getting married to you unless we
can like drag it out and like have a fight
and like get over it.

Speaker 2 (01:03:53):
That's where it's at.

Speaker 3 (01:03:54):
So she has been kind, sweet, and caring throughout our relationship.
Her child, who I am growing to love, has never
been an issue. And I didn't even meet him for
the first couple of months until she knew we were
going to be something long term. I would never have
been this involved or committed had she shown these traits before.

Speaker 2 (01:04:12):
And there are comments. Number one, she's not bipolar.

Speaker 3 (01:04:15):
You just stood your ground and she made the decision
that going on a free vacation was not worth losing you.
Comment to this might be workable. First off, she's not bipolar.
She quit trying to walk all over you because you
just showed her she can't. That's why she quit treating
you like crap. So keep that same mindset you had
in your twenty minute introspection and act like it. She'll
see that she can't be crappy to you if she
wants to stay with you, and she won't act like

(01:04:36):
this anymore. She doesn't need counseling just for you to
be the guy who is willing to leave her when
she treats you poorly.

Speaker 2 (01:04:42):
And there's a third update here. What I would say?

Speaker 5 (01:04:46):
What would you say?

Speaker 3 (01:04:46):
Because getting the counseling or not, it's like it sets
a penultimatum, right, Yeah, I think you'd say, like, I
think maybe, judging how you reacted to that conversation, you
might want therapy. But also I would stay separated longer.
I wouldn't just take her back.

Speaker 7 (01:05:04):
I think absolutely, at the very least postpone the wedding,
like don't don't have a wedding anytime soon. You'll y'all aren't.
Like it doesn't mean you have to break up, but
y'all are not ready for a wedding.

Speaker 3 (01:05:15):
You can't be sure if this is from that survival
mode of like, oh I messed up. Now I've got
to salvage the relationship and make all these short term
changes and short term behaviors, or if it's like something
that's really viable long term, to make.

Speaker 7 (01:05:29):
Sure this isn't how she reacts every time you disagree
with her.

Speaker 2 (01:05:31):
Just because y'all haven't been a disagreeing update.

Speaker 3 (01:05:34):
Three, well, as I somewhat expected, she calls me up
bawling about money already being deposited and that she really
wants me to reconsider this and that her son was
already looking forward to going on the trip.

Speaker 2 (01:05:45):
Bloody blah by blah.

Speaker 3 (01:05:47):
She kept swearing up and down that she had no
feelings for her ex and that she's committed to our
relationship but wants to be able to give her son
this trip. I let her talk and gave her complete silence.
So finally, after a few minutes of spiel, she ends
and there is just empty open air. Finally, she asks
if I'm still there, and I say I am. She

(01:06:09):
wanted to know what I thought now, I said, in
a very calm manner. If I wasn't comfortable with this before,
nothing has changed to make me comfortable with this now.
You said you would stay that one night and return.
She then butts in and says that her ex didn't
think that he could handle her son alone the rest
of the week at the park and other attractions. I
said that he was the father, and he should be
able to handle the kid. However, at the end of

(01:06:31):
the day, it didn't matter to me, as I made
myself perfectly clear that I was not okay with this,
nor was I ever going.

Speaker 2 (01:06:37):
To be okay with this.

Speaker 3 (01:06:40):
She starts to lose it again and tells me I'm
being selfish, which honestly, I kind of agree with in
this situation. I don't think it's fair to be like,
you can't go on a vacation with the like whatever
you want to call it, the nuclear family or the
biological family of your son.

Speaker 7 (01:06:59):
Now I see like I do. I don't agree with
Ope's decision here. But also I think that he's wrong
in the sense that he said nothing has changed, because
I think a lot has changed. I think that now
she's given him a reason to not trust her. Before
she probably could have been like, no, you know what
I'm gonna like, maybe we're not going to stand the
same room. We're gonna go on this vacation because I

(01:07:19):
have to.

Speaker 5 (01:07:19):
Be there for my kid.

Speaker 7 (01:07:20):
If she had approached it in a reasonable way, they
might have been able to reach some sort of consensus,
some sort of compromise. Now she's blown everything out of
proportion and now he's like, well, I'm definitely not trusting
you now.

Speaker 2 (01:07:32):
But again, dude, it's like, let it be weird.

Speaker 3 (01:07:35):
And if it's like she goes on that vacation, she's like,
I'm actually gonna marry my ex and we're gonna raise
our sun together. It's like, all right, yeah, they got Hey, look,
we don't even have to get a divorce lawyer because
we're not married yet.

Speaker 7 (01:07:46):
I mean, it's no longer about the vacation for them,
it's about the fact that she reacted really, really poorly
and broke his trust.

Speaker 3 (01:07:54):
She starts losing it and tells me I'm being selfish.
I told her I was hanging up and would contact
her later, as at that point in time, I was
upset and needed to think I do love her, and
I unfortunately was becoming attached to her son. She had
been up until this point a reasonable decent human being,
but I just felt that I was at the end
of my rope here. I don't believe in texting or

(01:08:15):
doing crap over the phone. So I knew the X
had her son. So I went to her house and
just told her point blank, this is a deal breaker
for me, and that she needed to think hard and
fast if this was going to cause her to have
resentment for me going forward, because that would not be
healthy or fair to her. She said that it would,
and I said that I was sorry that things ended
this way, but at this point in time, I could

(01:08:36):
no longer envision either of us happy with the life
together going forward from this. She cried a little, but
not hysterical, just kind of a sad crying. Truth be told,
I did a little too as soon as I left,
because I was certain that this was going to work out.
We agreed to split the cost of refunding what we
have put into the wedding and cancelations that might not

(01:08:56):
give us our deposits back. And by the way, you
can always get your deposit back when you listen to
full episodes with stories just like this.

Speaker 2 (01:09:08):
What deposit the deposit of your time, your attention, your energy.

Speaker 3 (01:09:12):
Because guess what, you get that deposit back and you
get to put it right towards another full episode with
more stories on Spotify. iHeartRadio, Apple podcasts, wherever you listen
to podcasts.

Speaker 5 (01:09:24):
Just search.

Speaker 3 (01:09:25):
Okay, story time, do it, but there's a little bit
more story here.

Speaker 2 (01:09:29):
I think.

Speaker 3 (01:09:29):
Honestly, do you have any parting words. We've talked it
out pretty well.

Speaker 7 (01:09:33):
To my Yeah, understand, I think it's just like if
y'all don't go to therapy.

Speaker 5 (01:09:38):
I don't know, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:09:40):
I think it's just time to cut your losses. There
is a part of me, though, that is annoyed at myself,
saying I'm being dumb and throwing away a great girl
just because she's going to stay in the same room
as an ex. However, while I don't feel great about it,
I do at least feel that I walked away with
some dignity. Not one hundred percent sure that this was

(01:10:00):
the right thing, but I know for a fact that
either one of us would have been resentful of the
other after this. I know it's crazy, but in a way,
I hope she gets back together with her ex. He's
great to his kid, and she is the one who
cheated on him years ago, so maybe the guy can
turn her around.

Speaker 5 (01:10:17):
Wi she cheats.

Speaker 3 (01:10:20):
There are some comments here, let's finish it off. Oh man,
she had a history of cheating already. Just think about
how badly she wanted to spend the week with her ex.
She was not thinking about her kids. She wanted to
get free trip and would have slept with her ex. Again,
it's just all assumptions and it's like, there's one more
comment and it's just like again being like she wanted
to build a life with her ex, which we.

Speaker 5 (01:10:40):
Don't know now, we don't know that.

Speaker 3 (01:10:41):
If you're really thinking like, dang, she wants to get
with her ex, doesn't she just be like, Hey, I
think you might want to get with your ex.

Speaker 2 (01:10:48):
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (01:10:49):
Your trust is already broken.

Speaker 2 (01:10:51):
I don't want you to not go. I think you
should go.

Speaker 3 (01:10:53):
And if you are still in love with your ex
and you realize it, let's just move forward with that knowledge.

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