My fiancee and her family are EMBARRASSED with my disabled brother… they exclude him from everything! | Reddit Stories

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Sam. This is John the og Storytime
podcast host. Oh yeah, we got some great stories coming up.

Speaker 2 (00:06):
But before that, we get a teeny two minute break
from the sponsors that keep this show propped up like
a little house.

Speaker 3 (00:12):
Oh yeah, my fiance and her family are embarrassed by
my disabled brother.

Speaker 4 (00:17):
They exclude him from everything. They're embarrassing. That's actually really
embarrassing to be them. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (00:25):
I twenty nine male, have been with my fiance, thirty
three female, for three years. We met while I was
working in the US. We've been engaged for a few months.
Wedding plans are for fall of next year. Our parents
share the same cultural background. I have a brother, thirty
one male, with Down syndrum. She has no siblings. By
the way, it comes from Camague on the r slash. Okay,
Storytime separated, so I didn't talk too much about my

(00:46):
family for the first year of our relationship. This was
for no specific reason, they just weren't there. She knew
my background though, and that my brother had Down syndrome.
My fiance comes from a lot of money, whereas my
family and I are middle class. My parents run a
restaurant in my country, and my brother is employed by that.
When I was younger, I used to do all the
deliveries with my brother, and he took over that job
completely when I left for university. I love my brother,

(01:08):
and when I talk about him, I don't focus on
his disability.

Speaker 4 (01:11):
To me, he's just my brother.

Speaker 3 (01:12):
When I talk about him or recount a story from
my past, I just tell it. It's not necessary to
mention that he's disabled every single time. One of the
things my fiance has used against me in an argument
is that I downplayed his disability because I talked about
him so casually.

Speaker 4 (01:26):
He's supposed to do be like, that's my brother. I
went to the store today. Yeah, oh my god, I
was talking to my brother with towns right about the
football game.

Speaker 5 (01:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:38):
That's just so unnecessar.

Speaker 3 (01:39):
Why would you do that? Yeah, that would be weird.
That's really interesting. She first met my family during year
two of our relationship. She met my brother and he
was nothing but gentlemanly towards her. He gave her a gift,
bowed to her, and refused to drop formal speech. That's
so nice of him. His quirk was that he was
overly respectful and made himself available in case she needed

(01:59):
any This was just his way of being hospitable, and
I couldn't talk him into relaxing. My fiance didn't complain
about anything to me or express she was uncomfortable. During
her three week visit, there was probably a handful of
small occasions where my brother accompanied us. These were things
like sharing a few meals and wondering around afterwards, because
he wanted to be our guide. When I was younger,
I could tell my brother something like find me a

(02:20):
quiet place where no one will bother me, and he
would be able to take me to the perfect spot.

Speaker 4 (02:24):
You could get as specific as you want. This is
one of his talents.

Speaker 3 (02:27):
And I challenged my fiance to describe somewhere she wanted
to go so he could take us there. That's a fun,
little I like adventure. I really love that, especially if
he's like excited about showing them places like that's perfect.
I remember her asking me if he could leave after
he took us to a place.

Speaker 4 (02:43):
I thought she just wanted to be alone with me.

Speaker 3 (02:44):
Now I feel like it was because she was embarrassed
to have my brother there with us. Between that first
visit and our engagement, there aren't any other interactions that
I can think of.

Speaker 4 (02:53):
It makes me.

Speaker 3 (02:54):
Feel like her reaction has come on suddenly. I don't
understand it. I'm confused. But after we got engaged, I
sugges did we elope because I'm just that kind of person.
I don't care about weddings. I've been teasing her from
day one to just run away with me. She said
she would like a proper wedding because she is an
only child and her parents would like to see her
get married. I told her, if it's important to her,
it's important to me. Our families met recently, her parents

(03:16):
met my brother for the first time. While we were
taking photos, my fiance's mom insisted on taking a lot
of photos of just me with my fiance's family and
a few with my parents, excluding my brother.

Speaker 4 (03:25):
From a lot of the group photos. So weird. That
is weird, but so weird, that's really weird.

Speaker 3 (03:31):
It wasn't apparent at first that this was happening until
my dad approached me on the sidelines and whispered, does
it feel like they don't want my brother in the photos.
I didn't want to acknowledge something like this was happening,
so I told my dad that can't be true.

Speaker 4 (03:43):
That can't be true. No, absolutely.

Speaker 3 (03:47):
I made a stupid joke about how it's probably because
they want photos with their future son in law more
and kept my focus on making sure everything went well
that night.

Speaker 4 (03:54):
I thought it did.

Speaker 3 (03:56):
My fiance and I went back to her place after
this and nothing was wrong. In the middle of undressing,
and I said something like, I can't wait for all
this wedding stuff to be over, so I can have
you to myself. She said something back like me too,
So I can have you to myself and you won't
have to deal with your brother.

Speaker 4 (04:10):
Oh no, how dare you? Wow? You won't have to
deal with your brother? Also, just like it feels like
she thinks that he's gonna be on the same page. Yeah,
and I'm just wondering, when is Opie ever given right?
Why would you?

Speaker 3 (04:26):
That's an insane thing to say. Wow, this spoiled the
mood for me. I thought it was a strange thing
to say, so I kind of reacted coldly.

Speaker 4 (04:33):
I asked her, what does that mean.

Speaker 3 (04:34):
She started cressing my face and hair and stuff, telling
me she knows it must be hard. I probably feel
very burdened about having a disabled sibling, but when I
settle in the US with her. I can finally have
a life of my own.

Speaker 4 (04:45):
Shah. No one's going to us with you. Yeah, it's
not gonna happen. You're going to the US by yourself
to live alone. Yeah that's you suck and you're ablest. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (04:58):
Oh my goodness, I'm rude. This started an argument. I
got a bit heated and mentioned him being.

Speaker 4 (05:03):
Excluded from the photos. She didn't acknowledge it, but she
didn't deny it either. Hmmm.

Speaker 3 (05:09):
She defended her mom and said she's probably just uncomfortable
being around someone like that.

Speaker 4 (05:14):
Oh, keep making it worse. It's just so much worse.
Stop dogging.

Speaker 3 (05:18):
Oh my goodness. I challenged her statement. She got upset
and asked me to drop it and come to bed.
I told her I'm leaving, and I went to stay
with my parents. By the way, you can only stay
with us live on YouTube every week day three pmpst.

Speaker 4 (05:31):
You just got dap your profile, dada profile.

Speaker 3 (05:33):
I didn't have the heart to explain why I showed up,
so I just put on a face and said I
wanted to spend time with them. My fiance and I
have been distant for days. She reached out a few times,
but I need time. It's just there's something tugging at
the back of my brain and telling me that she
and her family are embarrassed by my family. There's no
clear sign, but the feeling is there. After this recent
interaction between our families and our argument. My friends think

(05:55):
it's just cold feet because things are getting real, but
I don't think it's that.

Speaker 4 (05:59):
And that is the end. Oh no, not a sad end.
Oh my gosh. Yeah, that's crazy. No, I don't think. Yeah,
I think that's fair. I think it's a fair reason
to not want to go through the wedding. Yeah, your
partner is thinking badly about your family member. Yeah, hopefully
everything works out with it and you get to hang

(06:19):
out with your brother.

Speaker 3 (06:20):
You'll find someone that loves hanging out with your brother. Yes,
and it's not embarrassed by him at all.

Speaker 4 (06:24):
Yeah, it doesn't suck as a person.

Speaker 3 (06:26):
Yea.

Speaker 4 (06:27):
But that's the end of that story and we'll see
you for the next one. Woo. My boyfriend deleted my
novel because he said I wasn't paying enough attention to him.
Oh my gosh, I'm deleting our relationship. I have been
working on a novel for about a year. I write
every day, even just a sentence. Six months ago, my

(06:47):
college switched to smart boars and put all their whiteboards
in the garbage. I grab two because I have a
huge wall space open in my living room. By the way,
this comes from ten point font on the Okay, storytime separated.
So most of my writing is done my Google Drive.
But I have things like character personalities, names, places, a
general timeline, et cetera. You know, stuff I want to remember.
I used to take photos of it so I had

(07:09):
my ideas with me. I used to write on my
lunch break. I stopped doing that because I burn myself
out and my writing quality takes a huge dive. Plus,
my boyfriend helps me write and it helps us connect
in such a deep way, so I haven't taken a
photo in about three months. The whiteboards are nice because
I can read my notes across the room while I'm
sitting in my favorite chair. I got home last night
and all of my stuff was erased. It was all

(07:31):
just train of thought, like I'd come home and jot
something down. Handwriting is way more cathartic for me. I
had sketches of things in the novel. I'd basically have
to go through and remember every single thing. I have
a lot of it stored in my head or on
my Google drive. But there are some things I'll never
get back. But it's the fact he erased it. We
don't live together. What so he broke in and erased it?

(07:54):
I guess so what he told me. I've been focusing
too much on it and have no time for him.
We hang out of my house five to six nights
a week. What you got five to six times a week?
And he's complain of not having enough time. I feel
like I'm going insane. I right while he plays video games.
It's a good dynamic and I thought we enjoyed it.

(08:14):
Apparently we were always laughing and he helps me with
my wording and I google stuff to help him in
his game. This is the first time he's mentioned it
bothering him. If he had brought it up, we could
have talked about it. But he went nuclear, and I
have no idea why. I don't know what to do.
I'm so frustrated. We have had one serious argument over
his driving. He got better. My family took him on

(08:34):
vacation a few weeks ago. We watch his nephew all
the time. His family paid for my entire spring semester.
We are so much a part of each other's lives,
and I feel so hurt and heartbroken. He's my muse
and just the other day we went to the jewelry
store to look at Rasooh. My feelings rotate between rage, sadness, confusion, sorrow, anger, everything. Wow,

(08:57):
how do I even approach this? Last night I was
so up, said I asked him to leave. He hasn't texted,
he hasn't called, he hasn't stopped by. I keep typing
in questions to ask, but I keep erasing them. Why
did you do it? Are you unhappy with our relationship?
What did I do? Nothing? I'm even more heartbroken due
to the fact he hasn't called or texted all day.
I'm afraid to call him. I don't want to hear

(09:18):
him say he thinks we should break up, or he
doesn't want to be with me when I'm writing, or
just ignore my call. And there is an update three
months later.

Speaker 5 (09:25):
Oh my gosh, I think I think that there's a
fire in my brain right now because my heart so
insane and like he's playing he plays video games while
she writes that sounds like a great dynamic.

Speaker 4 (09:38):
Sounds like, honestly, if this this is my ideal dynamic.

Speaker 3 (09:42):
If he's doing his thing too, he's not like trying
to talk to her or something like that, Like it's Yeah,
I could see it being some sort of dramatic thing
where she's like, you know, writing or whatever, and then
he's like trying to talk about her day. And then
she didn't realize that he didn't erase it because he
did it while he was talking or something like that,
and she didn't pay attention to him.

Speaker 4 (10:00):
Yeah, but that's definitely not what's happening here. It seems
like he I don't know, he's just throwing a fit,
not communicating. Yeah. And also she said that they kind
of share the writing process together because like it' she said,
like she talks to him about it. Yeah, she like
brings up She's like, oh, like let's research something, little details.

Speaker 3 (10:19):
He knew it was important to her, and he knew
that that would hurt, and that's why he.

Speaker 4 (10:24):
Did it and even confessed that that was the reason
crazy get out of there. He should be open that
you don't bring up with him. Yeah, there you go,
did you hold the power here? Three months later, it's
been about three months since I made my post. This
somehow seems like it got really long. The night I
made my post, I went to a friend's house and
she ordered a pizza. We got ice cream and a
bottle of wine. She's a straight shooter, takes a neutral approach,

(10:45):
and she gave solid relationship advice, so I felt comfortable
talking to her about everything. She couldn't figure out why
he'd done it. We went over how he and I
hung out, how much he seemed to care about me,
how he looked into each other's eyes. But it also
revealed a lot of hesitation on my part. I'm a
pause a person and tend to forgive faults or overlook them.
I suspected some sort of coping method from my childhood.

(11:05):
We had some unresolved issues. I think he was holding in,
but when I'd bring them up, he just kind of
got salty and he would go, it's fine, I don't
care anymore. But he'd bring them up in arguments. I
didn't realize how toxic it was. Oh that same night,
I told him I was coming over the next day
to talk about things. I told him i'd be over
around eleven, and the only thing he texted me was okay,

(11:26):
which I didn't respond to. I went over to his
house at eleven and he was still asleep. He got
upset when I woke him up. It took the wind
out of my sails. On a good day, I cry
if something upsets me. But I was so angry and
heartbroken I couldn't even think. I left without saying a
word to him. He didn't follow me. On my way out,
I went to the kitchen and took my house key
from his key ring. I drove home in a daze,

(11:47):
collected all of his things, put them in a box
on my porch, and texted him to come get them.
He said, what the hell, that's fine, I'll come by
later and pick them up. I went out with a
few girlfriends. We got day wasted and had some of
these food It made me feel better. But when I
got home and his things were gone, I was heartbroken. Wow,
just the fact that he never texted her, never like

(12:09):
said don didn't even try to talk to her about it.
Just was like, that's it, We're over. So crazy. I
never texted him, he never texted me. I got absolutely
no closure, And even though people say closure is bs,
I've had the hardest time moving on. It's been three months,
and I still cry in the shower sometimes. Even though
I broke up with him, I still feel so confused

(12:30):
and heartbroken. I never figured out why he did what
he did. I likely never will, and I miss his
help and companionship. I love to come here and say
I finished my book, but I haven't written much since
I can't get into my characters' heads anymore. There's a
feeling of loneliness and grief, and that sort of helped
me create a better outline, but I can't write about
my characters. The other day I went to the bookstore
to study. I ended up looking at books related to

(12:52):
time travel and found one that has thousands of positive reviews.
My novel is science fiction, and I've been trying to
think of how to incorporate time travel, so it's kind
of lined up perfectly. It turns out a lot of
my ideas mirror theoretical physics. It's eerie. I've never taken
physics or read about it. To suddenly string theory makes sense,
cosmology makes sense. Whoa oh, he's like, it's all I'm

(13:13):
blown away and it makes me feel so weird that
so much of my plot has been studied, so the
book has lit a fire under me. Reading more about
everything makes me so excited, and it's helped me really
flesh out my plot. I can't put it down and
read twenty or so pages a night. I haven't actually
made time to sit and read a book for years.
I always have a notebook with me now, so I
write my ideas down. I haven't written about my characters yet,

(13:35):
but my passion is back. My plot is making more sense.
And by the way, it would make sense for you
guys to join us live every weekday at three PMPSD
on YouTube, on Facebook, on TikTok. Just tap her profile,
just top it. That's it. I'm so excited for her. Yeah,
this book now sucks that you had to break up,
but you got a book.

Speaker 3 (13:52):
The best way to get out of a breakover, to
move on, though, I feel, is just to do exactly that,
like just stuff, get busy with your hobbies, your job, whatever,
you know.

Speaker 4 (14:01):
And it sounds like she's doing that, and I'm very
excited now. I don't care much about how we broke up.
I'm not confused. I sometimes get sad at night or
during the day, or if I go out and make
long dye contact with a guy. I haven't thought about dating,
and I'm still too hurt to pursue it. But every
day I move on a little bit more. Kay, that's
how it goes. I wanted to thank everyone who gave
me advice. I forgot about my post until just now,

(14:23):
and when I went back through to read it, it
made me realize how seriously messed up it was, and
it gave me closure. Thank you. Wow that story. Wow, Ope,
you're gonna You're gonna get through it. It's good. Take time. Yeah,
but you know, let your heart heal. You got it.
But that's the end of that story. So let's get
into the next one.

Speaker 3 (14:41):
I snooped on my boyfriend's phone and I saw him
and his ex.

Speaker 4 (14:46):
So it was an old picture.

Speaker 3 (14:48):
Please let's find out I thirty two females have been
dating my boyfriend forty email for technically two years. When
we first got together, we were both going through a lot,
and after a few months, he asked if we could
take a step back from the relationship s part and
just focus on ourselves and remain friends and close. By
the way, this comes from a snake in the grass
on the r slash Okay, story time sepread. He says

(15:08):
it was a break but definitely felt like a breakup.

Speaker 4 (15:11):
Yeah, remain friends. That sounds like a break Yeah, that
really does for some contacts. Shortly before we got together,
we were both going through a divorce.

Speaker 3 (15:18):
My husband of twelve years decided he didn't want to
be married anymore, and he moved to Japan.

Speaker 4 (15:24):
Wait, he was eighteen because thirty two. Well she's thirty
two now she's been with her boyfriend. Oh she was
twenty twenty, She still twenty when they She's been with
her now partner for two years, so she was thirty
so she yeah, eighteen, shoot dead?

Speaker 3 (15:40):
Oh Man, and his wife was emotionally abusive and drinking
heavily from her depression. During our break, he spent a
lot of time with his soon to be ex wife
alone in his home. To this day, he remains that
nothing happened, but when we made things official again, she
told him that she felt led on and blah blah blah.

Speaker 4 (15:58):
She spent a bunch of time with his Yeah, but
maybe weren't like fully divorced.

Speaker 3 (16:03):
Yeah, crazy, And he confessed that she spent the night
here at some point during that time. But it's firm
that she only slept on the couch because it was late.

Speaker 4 (16:11):
Before everyone jumps. I wasn't innocent during this time.

Speaker 3 (16:15):
After a few months up the break, I assumed he
was going to work things out with his ex, as
she probably did too clearly.

Speaker 4 (16:21):
So I started talking to a guy. I thought he
was nice.

Speaker 3 (16:24):
That's a whole emotionally traumatic story in and of itself,
and we talked a lot and spent a good amount
of time together. We have a physical relationship, and I
know that makes me sort of an a hole. But again,
another story time. Please send that one in, then send
it in. So my now boyfriend finds out about this
guy I'm talking to and flips he thought we were
on a break and that we were always going to

(16:46):
come back to each other. Then you have to be
clear about that, you be like, in three months time,
let's rehash this, right, just see anyone else?

Speaker 4 (16:54):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (16:54):
Yeah, that's just that seems hard. Thus starts a few
month long entanglement where I was absolutely the a hole
and have taken full responsibility for my actions, and my
boyfriend has forgiven me as I him for that time,
and we came back together and have been officially dating
and exclusive for almost a year.

Speaker 4 (17:10):
Okay, so they said like technically two years. Yeah, so
a year.

Speaker 3 (17:14):
So yeah, now here we are sharing a home together,
happy as can be. I'm going to say, I know
snooping is bad, invasion of privacy.

Speaker 4 (17:21):
I am in the wrong for that part.

Speaker 3 (17:22):
And I do understand that I have snooped previously and
found a picture on his phone from his and his
ex wife's sleepover where she was finishing changing into one
of his shirts, no pants on.

Speaker 4 (17:34):
And kneeling on the bed we now share and have
been sharing.

Speaker 6 (17:38):
Okay, Okay, this is not just any picture, Okay, Okay,
So it seems like during the break, Yes, this is
what was happen because like during like what I'm assuming
it sounds like this was during the break Yeah.

Speaker 4 (17:51):
But so not necessarily like cheating, however, very hypocritical because
he was getting on heard about this when he was doing.

Speaker 3 (17:58):
The same thing, right, Like, it doesn't it's not necessarily
bad that they got together, but it's bad that he
lied about it this whole time.

Speaker 4 (18:05):
I was devastated.

Speaker 3 (18:07):
I knew she had slept over, but that how do
I not assume that they slept together? How do I
not try and fit those pieces together of did she
sleep in the bed with him?

Speaker 4 (18:16):
Did they have spicy sleep? No, wonder if she fell
let on.

Speaker 3 (18:20):
I eventually got so low with my own thoughts I
thought about hurting myself.

Speaker 4 (18:24):
No, oh, my gosh.

Speaker 3 (18:27):
As I was processing all of this, I had a thought,
is in the past, there's no changing what might or
might not have happened between them, or that I did
have a physical relationship with someone else, and he does
know about that part. So can I not forgive him
and move past this as well? I told him what
I had found at the time and exactly how it
made me feel. He immediately apologized, told me what happened,

(18:48):
and swore they did not sleep together.

Speaker 4 (18:50):
I don't know, man, I don't know. I don't know.

Speaker 6 (18:52):
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (18:53):
She's wearing no pants. You took a picture of her
wearing no pants.

Speaker 3 (18:56):
And she's putting on your shirt, put on your shirt,
changing in front of you. If you gun a separated
and you're like thinking of being with this other girl,
I don't think you'd.

Speaker 4 (19:04):
Be like naked with your X.

Speaker 3 (19:06):
Like.

Speaker 4 (19:06):
I don't know, man, I don't know about this. Just
be me, but may just.

Speaker 3 (19:09):
Be up call me traditional, But yeah, that's crazy. I
may never know the truth from that time, but it
is history and there is no going back. I've been
depressed again lately. A lot of stuff has happened to
me during this time of year, and things continue to
come up and remind me of those traumas. And I
had this moment. We can call it weakness, fear, and security,
self sabotage. All of the things are properly applicable. But

(19:32):
I went through his phone again last night. I went
to his saved passwords in the web browser. I found
a password for Spicy chat rooms, an only fans and Tinder.
I tried Tinder and the account was disabled. And I
truly don't think he's cheating. So I determine these must
have been from the time we were struggling to see
if we wanted to work things out.

Speaker 4 (19:51):
Okay, I think that is possible. I think so too.
I think so too.

Speaker 3 (19:54):
I can't fault my guy for being on dating sites
during that time. It was a very dark, depressing and
painful time for both of us. I know the part
I played in it. I heard him so deeply. The
reason I want to comfort him. I know you're asking
yourself now because he told me he was only on
Hinge during that time and told me about the girl
he had matched with and was talking to. He even
showed me the messages and they just talked about his

(20:15):
turmoil and me how much he loved me and wanted
to be with me. Our trust is still fragile and
being rebuilt, and this clearly means he was and is
lying to me about that time and what he was
truly doing.

Speaker 4 (20:27):
Wow, you guys need to have another car. I don't
think this is necessarily like end of relationship, but I
think you guys need to have another conversation where you're
just like, hey, yeah, we just put it all of
our cards on the table because I'm overthinking everything. I'm
not feeling depressed. We need to talk about it because
I'm just filling in the gaps that you ripen me
and that's not healthy. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (20:49):
Yeah, because it's really not like like it wouldn't be
an issue if they did anything together, if he like
was their women.

Speaker 4 (20:56):
Or something like that. Like it's truly just about him lying. Yeah.
That seems to be a common theme in all these
little stories.

Speaker 3 (21:03):
So yeah, but you can trust that we're never lying
to you when we say that. We're live on YouTube,
on Facebook, on everything every weekday three pm PST.

Speaker 4 (21:13):
Just top our profile and you can join us. It's
all you gotta do. We're lying. Well, there's more to this,
so let's get into it.

Speaker 3 (21:18):
I know I've said it in this post earlier, it's
in the past, but it just makes me feel so
completely terrible. I want to trust him. I want to
be the best Elsa I can be and let it go.
But I feel like I want to ask him about it.
I feel like I just want answers I may never
get and a truth that may never come to light. So, friends,
what should I do? So Sophia, what should we do?

Speaker 4 (21:40):
Should she have to go to him and be like,
let's have a frank discussion and if he's still lying,
still kind of hiding the truth and stuff, then you know,
maybe this relationship can't work. Yeah. Also, I think you
need to stop snooping. Yeah, I don't think that's all. Yeah,
and you didn't have a conversation with him about like, Hey,
I've been feeling the need to snoop because I feel
like you're hiding for me. True, and I know that's unhealthy,

(22:01):
and you need to work on that too. Yeahah, I
totally agree.

Speaker 3 (22:04):
I think snooping like, yeah, you might find some things
that seem suspicious, but also because you're snooping, Yeah, your
things might seem like they're suspicious already, you know what
I mean, Like it might not be, but it might
look at well, you guys are snooping and yeah, in
that mindset, in the process of finding out if your
partner has betrayed your trust, you are portraying third Yeah.

Speaker 4 (22:26):
So you can't really do that though. It's a lose lose. Yeah.
So I like what you said about, like, you know,
if you feel the need to snoop, tell them that
instead of actually doing it. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (22:34):
Yeah, Hey it's Sam, I'm your OG host. Here bring
it back to the stories. But here's three minutes bads
from our sponsored.

Speaker 4 (22:39):
My stepsister planned my eighteenth birthday party, and I laughed
in her face, just like that. A little background. My
mom and dad separated when I was six and each
went their separate ways. Of course, they had joint custody
of me, but they both started new families. When I
was nine, my mom married a man let's call I

(23:00):
am Robert Okay, who already had a daughter let's call
her Kira, who was two years older than me. My
dad got engaged when I was eight to a wonderful woman,
let's call her Leila, who he married when I was twelve.
By the way, this comes from Tasty Word twenty seven
to forty seven on the Okay Storytime Separated. My relationship
with Leila is beautiful. She has truly been a mother

(23:20):
to me. She basically helped my dad raise me. She
takes an interest in my life. She comforts me, she
advises me. We have common interests, and we do many
activities together. She and I recently talked about the possibility
of having her legally adopt me as soon as I
come of age. Doing so now would be a bit
messy legally because of my parents' joint custody. Because for me,

(23:41):
she is my real mother and I want it to
be official. That's lovely. My relationship with my bio mother,
on the other hand, is almost nonexistent. Even though I
was forced to spend specific days with her, we never
managed to bond because she spent all of her time
giving attention and affection to Kira, who already has her
own mind. Even when she tried to involve me in

(24:02):
some activity. She always included Kira, and we had to
do only what Kira liked. At a certain point, I
started to decline her invitations and often asked if I
could avoid going to her on the set days because
I was almost always ignored or left aside, and I
prefer to stay at home with my father and Leila.
My father always tried to understand me, but he also
had to honor the rules set by the judge, which is, yeah,

(24:25):
that's that's really hard by the judge. When I got
more mature, he admitted that he was afraid that my
mother might make some mean move in court if he
agreed to not let me go to her on the
appointed days. Yeah, this is something my mother would do.
After knowing this, I understood my father's reasons and I
absolutely don't want to put him in trouble. So I
didn't make such requests anymore, and I respected my schedule.

(24:47):
Now let's get to the point. In two weeks, I
will finally turn eighteen. I was lucky because my birthday
falls on the days I have to stay with my dad,
so he, Leila and I started planning my birthday a
month ago. It will be nothing too crazy, just a
party with family and friends. My favorite pizza place a
casual night where I just want to have fun with
the people I care about and do what I like.

(25:08):
The place also is karaoke, and I love singing. That
sounds great. I really want to do a piece of night.
She'd go pizza karaoke. Well, I don't know where a
pizza karaoke place is, but I do know a great
pizza place in the valley.

Speaker 1 (25:18):
I can make any karaoke place a pizza place by
ordering pizza to the karaoke place genius boom.

Speaker 4 (25:24):
Of course, after booking and setting everything up, we sent
out the invitations and this extended to my mother as well. Honestly,
I didn't really want her there, but then I thought
that this would actually be the last time I was
forced to be involved with her, because once I turn eighteen,
I won't be forced to follow the judge's rules anymore.
So we sent out the invitations two days ago, and

(25:44):
we already had most of the answers so we could
organize the precise number to send to the pizza place.
The only thing missing was my mother, who saw the
text and didn't respond. That's ridiculous, I told my father
that I would not insist and if she didn't respond,
then it meant that she didn't want to come, and
I was fine with that. I think my father was
also a little relieved by the idea, even if he

(26:05):
didn't say it openly, but I could see it on
his face anyway. The drama started this afternoon. It's all
was gonna be drama.

Speaker 1 (26:13):
No, not the drama.

Speaker 3 (26:16):
No.

Speaker 4 (26:16):
My mother called me very angry, accusing me of being
childish and that I shouldn't have planned anything without telling
her first girl she did, she did?

Speaker 1 (26:25):
Are we ignoring reality again?

Speaker 4 (26:27):
Did we look at her phone? This left me a
little confused, and I reminded her that I always planned
all my birthdays with Dad and Layla. Most of the
time she didn't even remember, so complaining now was quite hypocritical.
This makes her even angrier and started attacking me because
Kira has been crying ever since I sent the invitation
to my mother, because she had already planned a whole

(26:48):
birthday party for me. What you could say, okay, okay, One,
why is she so upset? And two you can still
plan that birthday party, just on a different day.

Speaker 1 (27:00):
This is just feeling like somebody who enjoys the process
of being upset.

Speaker 4 (27:06):
Yes, and it makes everything about her like always the victim.

Speaker 1 (27:10):
The feeling of being upset and spreading it to others.
There are some people who just can't get enough of that,
and I certainly wish they would and just stop it.

Speaker 4 (27:20):
Just freaking stop it. It's really embarrassing for you.

Speaker 1 (27:24):
It's cringe.

Speaker 4 (27:25):
And I was really speechless because the relationship between me
and Kira is zero. She is the classic spoiled princess,
oh spoiled brat who always wants to be the center
of attention, and my mother has always supported this behavior
of hers, making it worse, and clearly she and I
have never got along. I just didn't understand why the
heck Kia wanted to organize a birthday party for me.

(27:46):
It didn't make sense. It doesn't make sense. I asked
her why she did it, and especially why she did
it without telling me. I mean, she didn't really think
I wouldn't make any plans for my eighteenth birthday, right.
It was ridiculous my mother that it was supposed to
be a surprise, and since I didn't tell her about
my plans, she thought I didn't want to do anything.
For my birthday. And I mean she could have asked, no, no, yeah, no,

(28:10):
I don't she doesn't get she would ask the thing
is like, your mom's for your mom. Your birthday isn't
about you, It is about her showing that she's this
amazing mother.

Speaker 1 (28:20):
Well, it's actually your mom's birthing day.

Speaker 4 (28:22):
Yeah, you selfish. It's like it's when I had to
push you out.

Speaker 1 (28:25):
Don't you realize this was the day I gave birth
to you.

Speaker 4 (28:29):
But here comes the worst part, and I admit the
one that made me lose my cool. My mother started
listing all the things Kira had prepared for my party,
maybe to rub in my face what I would have missed,
and they were all Kira's favorite activities, things that I
didn't like. She had booked a fish restaurant for lunch.
I don't even eat fish, not because of some whim
but because it makes me feel sick. Just smelling fish

(28:51):
makes me feel nauseous. I'm not allergic. I had a checked.
My body simply rejects it. She also booked an afternoon
activity at a ranch near the city where my mother
now lives, where you can ride horses, and well, I
don't like it. I have nothing against horses in particular,
but the idea of riding one or getting really close
to an animal that big scares me. Then she thought
about going back to my mom's house for a backyard

(29:12):
barbecue for dinner, and I just don't want to do
that because I don't want to spend more time with
my mom than I have to. If this wasn't, you know,
a really awful idea for Opie's birthday, and I wouldn't
have to be with the mom or Kira, this would
be fun.

Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah, I mean if. But the thing is that it's
like so you're like, if this entire thing was not
at all how it was.

Speaker 4 (29:32):
Well, no, the fish and the horse and the barbecue,
that sounds like a great time for me, I mean,
and that's who really matters, right exactly. My mother also
said they already sent out invitations to everyone to who
and at that point I was really speechless, but I
asked her who she had sent them to, because my friends,
my dad and his family hadn't received anything. It turns

(29:53):
out the invites were mostly sent out to Robert's family,
my mom's family, and Kira's friends. Honestly, it just sounds
like here's birthday.

Speaker 1 (29:59):
Here's a party for herself, and it is like, oh,
oh that's on Oh that's on her birthday. Okay, okay,
let's call it. This is your birthday party.

Speaker 4 (30:07):
Now, it's your birthday party. It's oh, he's birthday party.
I mean it was basically a party organized by Kira
for herself, but under the pretext that it was for
my birthday. So I didn't hold back anymore. I laughed
in my mother's face and hung up the phone.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
There it is.

Speaker 4 (30:21):
It was all too ridiculous to be true. Come on.
My dad came to me a little while ago, saying
that my mom called him mad because I laughed in
her face when she told me about the party they
had organized for me, and he was very upset about it.
He was starting to say that despite all the feelings
I had for my mom, they were trying to do
a nice thing for once, but I stopped him right
away and explained in detail how the party had been organized,

(30:44):
a detail that my mom apparently left out with him.
His expression changed quickly. He just said, I've got to
make a phone call. And I've been hearing him yelling
at my mom for at least twenty minutes by. Now, Wow,
Layla came to me after learning about the situation and
said that, as much as she could relate to me,
I was a little rude to laugh in my mother's
face and hang up without explaining, Okay, why are we
why are we defending mom here? She sucks for her.

(31:06):
I should have spoken out like an adult despite my
feelings and sort things out in a civil and mature way.
Oh okay, so Leila is saying you could have tried
to do it a little bit more maturely. She wasn't angry,
just a bit disappointed about how I acted. As soon
as she left, I thought about my actions and maybe
I was a little hasty, But I don't think talking
to my mom about it would have helped, honestly, but
maybe I could have handled it better. I'm starting to

(31:28):
think I was a bit of an a hole in
that moment. And there is an update. Now. I don't
know your parents. I get like, Okay, your dad and
Layla are being your parents, and they're like, you have
to be nice to people regardless. But ah, I'm not
your parent, man. I think your mom's a bit of
an ale and I don't care if her feelings were
hurt because she's not thinking about your birthday at all. Exactly.

Speaker 1 (31:50):
Go off, queen, Yeah, go off, queen. Yeah, you had
your dirt today. I can tell I've had my dirt.
Ye's plenty of like a five heap it Wait, how
many spoonfuls of dirt have you had?

Speaker 4 (31:59):
There is a lot of in here. I gotta be honest.
You can see. It's like when I was choking earlier.
It just got a huge klump of macha. I don't
know how much watch is anything there is, but it's sad.
I'm wired.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
There's literally dirt in that cup. It's just green flavored
and full of caffeine.

Speaker 4 (32:17):
Uh shoot, you got anything?

Speaker 1 (32:19):
I mean literally? Uh uh no, you hit them all literally.
I was just letting you take I was letting it.
Did you take that one away? I appreciate it because
you were like, you know what, not your mama.

Speaker 4 (32:31):
I'm not show nanny. I don't like that lady. I
like her one bit. But there is an up to Okay,
I didn't think my post, but get all of this
attention well, but thank you all for the good wishes
and words of comfort. I read all your comments and
decided to follow some advice. First of all, I talked
to Layla about my reaction to my mother. Layla raised
me on the importance of communication and always pushing me

(32:53):
to talk about my problems so I could solve them.
So I see where her comment about my behavior came from,
and I understand it. But I also gave her my
point of view, telling her that the situation my mother
was explaining was too absurd and laughing is the only
natural instinct that came to me while my mother was talking.
At some point, I thought, is it a joke or
some sort of bad prank. Is she making this all up?

(33:13):
Because her bs was absolutely ridiculous. Leyla said she understood me,
and as many of you have told me, she just
wanted me to understand that there will be situations in
my life where I can't just laugh and hang up
the phone. And she was just worried about my reaction.

Speaker 1 (33:27):
Okay, but to be fair, that is one hundred percent
of situation where you can just left.

Speaker 4 (33:31):
Yeah, phe Yeah, the valid reaction.

Speaker 1 (33:34):
I mean, just because you do it in this one
context doesn't mean you're gonna do it like when your
boss calls you, yeah, don't like, don't like laugh in
your boss's face and hang up the phone.

Speaker 4 (33:43):
Yeah, I feel like it's a different way to out
of the conversation. Anyway, we managed to clear the matter
between us, and I'm happy. I had also talked to
my dad about the phone call he had with my mom.
Apparently my mom had an excuse for everything. She said
that Kira just wanted to do a nice sisterly gesture
on my big days, that on my big day, that
she wanted to share her hobby riding horses with me,
and that she never thought my fish problem was a

(34:04):
real problem but just a whim and the restaurant they
had booked at made the best fish around.

Speaker 1 (34:09):
Oh that's cool. That's like saying that the doodoo factory
makes the best doodoo around. I don't like it, as
doo doo. Don't like the Dad, you can't make me
like it. I don't like it. Yeah, I just wanted
her to enjoy my hobby. No, you silly little goose.
On someone's birthday, you enjoy.

Speaker 4 (34:26):
Their hobby anyway. And that last one is a lie,
because when I was little, I threw up a couple
times in front of my mom just because we went
somewhere that smelled strongly of fish, so she knows very
well it's a real issue for me. My dad retorted
that nothing they had prepared had been done for me,
that Kira had clearly planned the party for herself, and
what kind of party was it for me if none

(34:47):
of my important people were there. My mother didn't respond
to this. She just started ranting that I was ungrateful
and spoiled. So my father told her to go to
eck and hung up the phone. Oh yeah, sick, father,
w Dad, that's why.

Speaker 1 (35:00):
Wish they were still flip phones, because it's so satisfied.

Speaker 4 (35:03):
Yeah, you could just break your phone well yeah, yeah,
when you're trying to go off grid and then.

Speaker 1 (35:11):
Break your smartphone in half.

Speaker 4 (35:12):
Yeah, So I never want to talk to you again.
After hearing this, I decided to follow another piece of
advice you gave me and wrote a message to my mother.
This time, I decided to be mature and wrote the
message in the most polite way possible. I apologized for laughing,
but what she was saying was too ridiculous, so it
was the only possible reaction from my side. I reminded

(35:32):
her that she never put any effort into building a
relationship with me. That she doesn't know me at all
and has never cared about getting to know me, and
since the birthday party Kira organized only had things that
Kia liked, they could enjoy it together with their family
and friends. I also told her that her invitation to
my pizza party was withdrawn. You're no longer invited to
my birthday party.

Speaker 1 (35:52):
You are no longer invited to chuck e cheese, and.

Speaker 4 (35:55):
She shouldn't bother showing up since she had already made
it clear with the last phone call what priorities were
and now I was going to do it too, and
she was absolutely not on my priority list. I already
have Leila as a mother, and I can't be I
can't be more happy with her. I concluded by wishing
her well with her new family and asked her not
to contact me again. Don't call me, don't come by

(36:17):
my house. We're done. We're done. She read the message
but didn't respond, and I'm fine with that. If she
were to respond, I'm sure would just be more complaints
about me being ungrateful and spoiled, because I know that
talking to her is useless. She would not understand or
pretend not to understand. But clarifying things once and for
all has put an end to our situation. At least

(36:38):
on my side, I had a sort of closure, and
I thank you all for that. I probably would have
given up and ended contact with her after my eighteenth
without saying anything, but your comments helped me understand that
a firm end was necessary. For those who asked how
my mom could throw me a surprise party when I
wasn't with her, my dad asked her the same question,
along with asking her how she could think he wouldn't

(37:00):
throw me an eighteenth birthday party. My dad took it
a bit personally, lol, and she said they had planned
for Robert to come get me the morning of my birthday,
so they just assumed that.

Speaker 1 (37:08):
Oh.

Speaker 4 (37:09):
People's like, they're like, yeah, oh, he's a loser. She's
probably got nothing going on for her birthday.

Speaker 1 (37:15):
You just gotta love the uh ohdesha, the loving care
of family at all times. Yeah, they all they did.
All these people did. All these people are guilty of
are trying to throw opia party? Yeah no, just kid,
this isn't hard mode. These people suck.

Speaker 4 (37:31):
These people breaking.

Speaker 1 (37:34):
A party and you when you have it doesn't matter
what the nature of the relationship is. If you have
relationships in your life that don't serve you in are
actively a negative force, you can feel free to cut
them off. Yeah please, m m mm hmmm.

Speaker 4 (37:48):
So true. Explain the situation to Dad and Laila and
then take me to my mom's house under some pretense. Honestly,
I don't know how it would have worked. I would
have flat out refused to go to my mother's if
it wasn't our set days, no matter what excuse they
would have made up. And most of all, I would
never have left Leila and Dad to go to my
mom's on my eighteenth birthday. It would have been one
thing if my mother and I had a good relationship,

(38:10):
but that was definitely not the case in all of this.
The only person I don't feel like blaming is Robert.
We never had a close relationship, but he was always
polite to me when we lived under the same roof.
He even cleared out his study so I could have
a permanent room in his house when I went to
my mother's. That's nice, said Robert. We didn't develop any
stepdaughter's stepfather bond, but he always tried to be kind

(38:31):
to me, So I don't blame him for any of this.
It's likely that he really thinks the party is for me.
We don't know each other well enough for him to
know my tastes unless my mother told him, which I
highly doubt she did. Luckily, I didn't leave anything of
mine at my mother's house either. All of my things
are here at my father's house permanently. Usually I would
unpack my suitcase when I went to my mother's with
the things I needed for those days, and then bring

(38:53):
them back when I went back to my father's. I
never felt safe leaving anything to her because Robert's family
and Keir's friends came over often, and I didn't want
to leave anything of mine out in the open to strangers.
But I want to put it out in the open
that you can join us live every weekd at three
pm PSD on YouTube, Facebook, and TikTok.

Speaker 1 (39:13):
Just tap the and twitch. Don't forget there's it's over
there on Twitch.

Speaker 4 (39:20):
But there is a little bit left to the story.
But do you have any thoughts?

Speaker 1 (39:22):
I mean, you know, I kind of already said like
people can be really hesitant to cut off the relationships
when there it's like family or something. But it's like
these people are. I don't know, it just sounds like
you're your mom in particular, just like doesn't walks. It's
always a big red flag when people just like don't
let you have negative thoughts or opinions.

Speaker 4 (39:43):
Yeah, like every negative thought and the appearance the feeling
is like immature. Someone said that right.

Speaker 1 (39:47):
Here, Yeah, where It's like, yeah, it's it goes back
to you. It's like, actually, it's your fault for feeling
that way.

Speaker 4 (39:52):
It's like is it though, like why did you what
did you do to cause that?

Speaker 1 (39:57):
Yeah? But yeah, that's you know, I think we all
know who's in the right and who's in the wrong.

Speaker 4 (40:02):
Inness I think we all know there's a little bit left. Well,
that's it for now. I hope my mom respects my
wish to go no contact and doesn't bother me anymore
after that. I'd also like to bring up the adoption
conversation with Leila after the holidays. She seemed really happy
when we first talked about it. That's lovely and also
that's like really it's nice because I mean, oh, he's
almost about to turn eighteen with his birthday, and so

(40:25):
the adoption is really just kind of this symbolic thing.
But it's really beautiful. It's like, you know, I want
you to be my mom. Nice little cherry. Thanks again
everyone for your kind words and advice. Your insights have
helped me better manage the situation. I can understand that
I'm still a little immature, but I feel that this
experience has helped me grow a little more and see
the issue from other points of view. All the best

(40:46):
for you, guys, And that is the end of that story.

Speaker 1 (40:48):
Wow, no, gals at the end of that Oh no,
she's only wishing the best for guys. For the guys,
I refused to help my fiance with her daughter, and
now she spewing lies.

Speaker 4 (41:02):
I get your spew out of here.

Speaker 1 (41:06):
The earth is flat. I am a twenty seven year
old man and my fiance is thirty. We've been together
for nearly four years. I have a six year old
son and she has an eleven year old daughter. From
previous relationships up until now, we've never had any issues
regarding the children.

Speaker 4 (41:27):
Children.

Speaker 1 (41:28):
By the way, this comes from user embarrassed Basis one
one sixty on the a slash Okay Storytime subaddit. So,
yesterday her daughter was set to go on a camping
trip for a friend's birthday where they'd be doing activities
like kayaking. My fiance dressed her in the dress and
I mentioned to her that it didn't seem like the
right choice for the ecasion. She seemed offended and said

(41:51):
her daughter could wear whatever she liked and that it
wasn't a man's place to judge. I tried to clarify
what I meant, but she cut me off, saying she's
my daughter, not yours.

Speaker 4 (42:01):
That's really annoying.

Speaker 1 (42:02):
That is annoying, especially when you're like, yeah, did you
misread the kayaking No, it's like.

Speaker 4 (42:08):
It seems like, oh, he wasn't being like you need
to tell your daughter to change. That is totally not Probably.
It was just like, hey, like, I don't know if
a dress is gonna be the best fit for kayaking.

Speaker 1 (42:17):
I took my son to a pre planned match when
my fiance rang me. It turned out the birthday girl's
mom had told her daughter she couldn't go in a
dress and needed to wear a tracksuit or something similar,
so they didn't let her on the bus.

Speaker 4 (42:30):
And that's what he warned them about.

Speaker 1 (42:31):
Hey, look at that. The consequences of your action. It's like,
she wears flip flops to you know, flip flops to football.

Speaker 4 (42:39):
Lab or okay, yeah that works, to a place where
you can't wear flipops.

Speaker 1 (42:43):
My fiance then asked if I could leave the match
early to drive her daughter to the activity center. I replied,
why should I. She's not my daughter and I'm here
with my son. Neither of us are talking now. I
do pity for my stepdaughter, and I wasn't being spiteful
a little bit. My son was looking forward to it
and it would be about four hours of travel. Am

(43:05):
I the a whole?

Speaker 4 (43:06):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (43:07):
You both are, Yeah, a little bit. Both are a
little bit, but yeah, you know, at the same time, it's.

Speaker 4 (43:11):
Like it's anything that a conversation can fix.

Speaker 1 (43:13):
I think your response is what made you the a hole,
not necessarily that you weren't able to do it. No, no, yeah,
that was the way that you said it that made
you kind of a holy I agree, because you would
also be an a hole if you just ditched your
son at his own match.

Speaker 4 (43:27):
Yeah, like that that would Your action was not a
whole ish, but your response.

Speaker 1 (43:32):
So we do have an edit. From what I get
I was a bit of an a hole and she
was a bigger a hole, So I'm going to try
to talk it out and see what we both want.
Relevant comments Reasonable Ruin thirty seven and sixty says, who
sends a girl kayaking in a dress? Yeah?

Speaker 4 (43:44):
That was crazy? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (43:46):
Yeah, someone who's never been kayaking is who wears a
dress to go kayaking? Prize Crow thirteen ninety six says
I've never been kayaking either, but common sense still tells
me that a child in a dress is wildly inappropriate
for that activity.

Speaker 4 (43:58):
Yeah, and also they have like the things online presumably
of like this is what you should wear to the
kayaking thing.

Speaker 1 (44:05):
Frankie File says, you'd be amazed how scarce a resource
common sense is. Mango Saint Jude says, not the a hole.
You tried to help her and she told you to
butt out. Make sure you get your apology. Ohp says yeah,
i'd say I'll be waiting for an apology. Bella Zell says,
dollars to donuts, you'll be waiting for a while. I'm
gonna say this just in case while waiting to be
sure to spend time with your stepdaughter, don't let her

(44:27):
get caught in the middle between you and her mom.
Butting heads regardless of who's the a hole. I mean,
it's not you, but that's irrelevant. She doesn't need this crap. Well,
I mean it's kind of I mean we I don't
agree with that. I think it was both. But yeah
the same time, yeah, oh, he says, Yeah, I'm taking
her and my son to the camp next weekend instead.
We won't do the camping part, but we'll do the activities. That's,
of course, if I'm allowed to take her. A fiance

(44:48):
is obviously invited to, but only if she wears a dress.
I'm joking. Blooming As six oh seven says, it's clear
your fiance misinterpreted your intentions. You weren't attacking her or
her daughter. You just saw aical issue with the outfit.
If she had addressed her daughter appropriately, if she had
dressed her daughter appropriately in the first place, you wouldn't
have needed to comment at all. But instead of recognizing that,

(45:09):
she got defensive and made it about you, which just
made things worse. If she'd taken a second to hear
you out instead of taking offense, maybe the whole situation
could have been avoided. Not the a hole. She can't
be a snarky person. And still expect you to help.
She made her choice and choices of consequences. The relationship
isn't lasting much longer. Lol, and good.

Speaker 4 (45:28):
She sounds like a red flag, Opie says.

Speaker 1 (45:31):
Yeah, I didn't want to sound like a drama queen,
but I'm very surprised what she said and questioning some stuff.
I see my stepdaughter as my daughter and would have
expected the same with her and my son. I'm not
saying I don't have a favorite child, but I love
them both. Judgment fiance is the bigger a hole, but
oh Pie, still me there is an update. There is

(45:51):
a little bit of stink. Yeah, but we got to
update and let's see who gets the most stinking.

Speaker 4 (45:56):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (45:57):
I had a conversation with my fiance and she asked
why I would say something so hurtful. I replied, I
was just repeating what she had said to me earlier.
Come on, red flag. There there it is again. Where
are flags? There's grab those flags. Get the flags. We're
getting more visual humor, get them, get them, get them
waving the red flag, red flag. She then asked if

(46:21):
I love her daughter, and I said I did. She
asked if it was as much as I loved my son,
and I responded almost as much. She got cranky. I
asked her if she loved my son. She said no,
what what?

Speaker 4 (46:36):
Wait?

Speaker 3 (46:37):
What?

Speaker 1 (46:38):
I asked her if she loved me, and her answer
was sort of, I'm just going to keep this red
flag in behind tucked behind my ear because this that
is the biggest red fla flag. Crazy. Why don't care
how upset you are? If you say that, you better
be ready to never see that person.

Speaker 4 (46:59):
Sort of, Oh, I sort of want to break.

Speaker 1 (47:02):
Up with you.

Speaker 4 (47:02):
Come on.

Speaker 1 (47:03):
She started crying, woke up her daughter and told her
they had to leave, even though I hadn't told them
to go. Like, girly, you did that, dude.

Speaker 4 (47:12):
Why are you crying? She's like, no, I don't love you.
Get up, Get up, daughter, getting natty.

Speaker 1 (47:21):
I love this man and I don't love and I
don't love his child.

Speaker 4 (47:25):
Hey, his son. God.

Speaker 1 (47:27):
I said we could talk about it tomorrow, but she insisted,
saying he doesn't want us anymore. I told her that
I never said that. Her daughter began crying and didn't
want to leave, but her mother said, don't let me
leave on my own.

Speaker 4 (47:39):
Oh my god, where are they going?

Speaker 1 (47:41):
She's going through like a mental breakdown. She gotta be
where are they even going? How do you say that
to your own kid? First you tell you, tell him
I don't love your son. I also barely even love you,
and you're like daughter. If you don't come with me now,
I will literally leave you here. He doesn't want you.
I reassured them both that they were welcome to stay.
My fiance decided to leave without her daughter, and now

(48:03):
she's not answering. When I spoke to my daughter's father,
he just laughed and said she couldn't even hold off
on the crazy until after the wedding.

Speaker 4 (48:12):
Dang, oh, wow, dang, comment's crazy.

Speaker 1 (48:17):
Great crad, she do be fancy average fifty four to forty,
That poor eleven year old girl. This won't be the
last time she has her life uprooted by her unstable mother.
Brief Candidate thirty nineteen sounds like you have a good
relationship with her ex. Listen to him.

Speaker 4 (48:33):
Yeah, yes, op, yeah.

Speaker 1 (48:35):
Despite his lack of presence in his daughter's life, he's
not a bad guy. Although perhaps my judge of character
isn't the best. Wait before I get onto this next comment. Yeah,
I think your judge of great character isn't the best
because that didn't come off to me as he's actually
a pretty good guy. He called you and laughed and
was like, yeah, my ex wife's crazy. She couldn't even
hold it in until after she married you.

Speaker 4 (48:54):
Stupid, We're we're getting too much, We're giving too much
credit to the X.

Speaker 1 (48:59):
Yeah, no, that making fun of you. Yeah, he made
fun of you and is also a deadbeat dad. No,
he's not a good guy. Moving on, last Unicorn seventy
six says she flat out told you she doesn't love
your son and she sort of loves you. Wow, you
avoided even more drama than was starting to brew. You
and your boy deserve so much better than a no
and a sort of OHP says my son is very

(49:20):
upset by her going her daughter less. So apparently I
don't toast pop tarts as well as she did, according
to my son. Brew Dog Drinker, Bullet dodged. OHP says
Bullet dodged until she remembers her daughter still living with me.
One last visit of crazy, and when she decides to
collect her, she has left her daughter there. Yeah, a
better Fox says you aren't the daughter's legal guardian. You
should contact authorities. If she's this manipulative, she's likely willing

(49:41):
to build up a story of how you kept her daughter.
I'd contact CPS or an attorney asap Op says, CPS
has been contacted. He tried getting through to her and
did not succeed. Her father gave permission for her to
stay with me, as per CPS. Honestly not even thinking
beyond tomorrow. At this stage, she's with me for the
foresee future. I haven't really thought that far ahead. I'd

(50:02):
imagine her mother will have every right when she returns, sadly,
to take her back. Op On the dad, Yeah, despite
his lack of presence in his daughter's life, he's not
a bad guy, although perhaps my judge of character isn't
the best, which you've already up very established. I would
imagine the mother didn't help, but no, he runs from responsibility.
One of the first times I met him, he was
shocked I was a single dad. His wise words were

(50:24):
adoption exists. Relation. Mammoth One says, you said she's much
nicer in your og post, But it doesn't sound like
it sounds like you've been putting up with crap and
somehow making it work and maybe even being in denial.
I just feel bad for the daughter. OHP says, maybe
I was. I have a feeling she has a guy
lined up and that's just how it switched so quickly.

(50:46):
But who knows. They're having a PJ day today. She's
definitely sad, but I'm sure there's more crap to file.
Oh well, don't worry, PJ dal will turn it around.
I always pajama Day at school was always so much fun.
I liked PJ Day.

Speaker 4 (50:59):
I did.

Speaker 1 (50:59):
Yeah, anyway, Update number two I told my fiance my
stepdaughter isn't mine, and I'm not sure if you've forgotten
all about me, But I'll start with some good news.
We finally figured out how to toast pop tarts properly
for my son.

Speaker 4 (51:12):
Hey, it's just toasting them a little bit longer.

Speaker 1 (51:16):
I'm getting rid of the red flag because you know
how to toast pop tarts. We had about two weeks of calm.
During that time. I spoke to my stepdaughter a few
times about everything. I reassured her that no matter what happens,
she'll always be my girl. Get the green flag, Get
the green flag. That's a green flag. That's a green flag.

Speaker 4 (51:34):
How sweet? Oh, yes, this is not Opie's child, and
he is just like being so incredibly lovely and supportive
of her when she's literally been abandoned by her mom. Indeed,
and her dad also, her dad was like, yeah, you
can just kind of take her. Why don't you?

Speaker 1 (51:49):
Why would you even take that one? You can just
adopt somebody? Or was he was the dad trying to
say that he can adopt his daughter.

Speaker 4 (51:55):
I have no idea I missed that is that?

Speaker 1 (51:56):
Is that what he was trying to say, which, again,
what a deadbeat dad. He's like, yeah, I'm not doing
anything with her. You can adopt her if you want, Okay.
She told me she hoped her mom wouldn't come back.
She says her mom was controlling. Then a few days ago,
my ex fiance walked into my house carrying two grocery bags,
acting as if nothing happened.

Speaker 4 (52:19):
He goes, hmmm.

Speaker 1 (52:22):
She asked me what I wanted for dinner. I told
the kids to go to their rooms, and I confronted her.
I told her that we're over. She asked why, and
when I didn't respond, she said couples fight, as if
her actions were normal. This behavior was unsettling. I told
her she needed to leave or I'd call the police.
She asked why I was doing this to her. I
was at a loss for words, so I picked up

(52:44):
my phone. At that point, she backed down, saying, Okay,
let me get my daughter. I told her if that
if she wanted her daughter, she needed to call CPS
and explain why she had disappeared for two weeks. She
insisted she had only been gone for one night.

Speaker 4 (52:57):
She having a breakdown.

Speaker 1 (52:58):
Actually, like straight up an episode like what she just
There are certain like mental disorders where it's like you
can actually blackout on days. Yeah, she might also have
it could be a substance.

Speaker 4 (53:13):
Problem or like bipolar.

Speaker 1 (53:15):
Anyway, She refused to leave without her daughter and started
shouting her name. Her daughter came out of her room
and reluctantly said she would go with her. I told her,
you have a place here for as long as you want.
Her mother then said, he'll kick you out, just like
he's kicking me out.

Speaker 4 (53:29):
You kicked herself out.

Speaker 1 (53:30):
She she literally literally left, you said you and then left. Yeah,
I hate your son, I don't love you. And by
the way, you're kicking me out, I'm leaving well. And
the whole time he said no, you don't have to leave.
I stood my ground saying she could have her daughter
back after speaking to CPS. When I started dialing the police,
she ran out. But you know what, I don't want

(53:50):
you to ever run out on us. Every three pm
on the weekdays, you can tune in to our live
streams on YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, and Twitter, which all you
gotta do is tabl profile and you're in.

Speaker 4 (54:04):
You're literally in.

Speaker 1 (54:05):
But don't go anywhere yet. You could go ahead and
check if we're live right now, but but don't go
anywhere because we've got thoughts.

Speaker 4 (54:12):
Oh boy, do I have thoughts. Yeah. I think either
it's some sort of mental health thing or a substance
substance thing, but she's definitely having some sort of breakdown
or episode. And I think it's definitely a good idea
to be like, you know what, you can call CPS
to get your kid back, And it's such an angel
move for you to be like, you know what, this

(54:32):
is not my daughter, but this is like a child
that I care a lot about, and I'm not going
to just you know, not care about what happens to her.
I'm going to make sure that she's safe. Yeah, that's
really really stand up guy.

Speaker 1 (54:43):
Move. Yeah. And this proves also that that thing that
he said at the beginning of the story when he
was on the phone with his now ex fiance, when
he was like, it's not even my daughter, it's like
that was just he was just saying that to get
He didn't feel that at all.

Speaker 4 (54:56):
He was just saying that to get it the ex
wife dex fiance, which is lovely to see.

Speaker 1 (55:01):
Yeah, Opie's just sweetie, and he's maybe too sweet for
his own good because he's talking about how the ex
husband is also like a good guy, which he's.

Speaker 4 (55:09):
Clearly not not a good guy.

Speaker 1 (55:10):
So, op, I think you need to work on being
able to see people's negative traits for what they are
instead of sort of I guess, brushing them aside.

Speaker 4 (55:20):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (55:20):
Anyway, later I talked to my stepdaughter. She said she
was willing to leave because she didn't want to cause
trouble for me. I reminded her that she's the child
and I'm the adult, and it's my responsibility to look
after her, not the other way around. I asked her
where she wanted to stay for now, and she said
she'd rather stay here. My ex fiance ended up calling CPS.
They reached out to me and they were supposed to

(55:41):
have a meeting yesterday with my fiance, but she didn't
show up to it.

Speaker 4 (55:44):
Apparently she's not What is she doing? Yeah, she's got
I mean good for the little girl, because I wouldn't
want her to be with this person when she's clearly
having some sort of breakdown.

Speaker 1 (55:53):
But I don't know. You do have some comments. Maintenance
Short forty eight twenty one says, quite right, she wants
her her daughter so badly with her that she missed
a CPS meeting. Hope your stepdaughter can stay with you.
Dark Star nine says doesn't. This reflects badly on her
for further dealings like teeming her an unfit parent and
taking custody of her daughter. Yeah, OP is her fiance.

(56:16):
If custody has given, it would be to next of kin,
the step daughter's father, unless he feels like his daughter
is much safer with you and happier than with him
than OP can fight for the custody. I'm not sure
the legalities of custody matters. Yeah, it's like and the
the actual dad doesn't even care.

Speaker 4 (56:32):
Doesn't even care. It's not even trying.

Speaker 1 (56:33):
Comments kind of reaffirming that it doesn't always have to
be next of kin that story. Yeah, so, yes, that
is the end of that story. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (56:43):
No, I think it's really really great that you stepped up, Opie.

Speaker 1 (56:45):
No, I did the did the right move. I'm glad
that I'm glad that she's not there destabilizing her child anymore,
or or being a negative influence on your son, who
she said she literally doesn't even have any love for
in the first place. So, yeah, you don't want to
get married to somebody who doesn't love your child.

Speaker 4 (57:04):
No, you, that's a prerequisite.

Speaker 1 (57:07):
Hey, it's John here, og host of the show. We're
gonna get back to these juicy stories. But here's a
quick three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

Speaker 4 (57:13):
My adopted mother abandoned me after my adopted dad passed,
but she always hated me.

Speaker 1 (57:19):
Wow. Well, I mean, hey, it sounds like you might
be better off without the woman that hates you.

Speaker 4 (57:24):
I twenty six female, was adopted at an early age,
along with a handful of my other siblings. My parents
only had two biological sons and adopted the rest of us.
By the way, this comes from a Dame Violet on
the okay storytime separate it. So even early on, my
sisters and I could tell the huge difference between our
treatment from our mother and the treatment she gave her sons,

(57:44):
biological and non biological. Because of this treatment, I have
always been closer to my dad. He didn't yell and
tear us down. You showed us love and not bitterness.
Over the years, my dad grew ill and my mother
would always make these comments like God forbid something happens
to him getting remarried. I've never just had my life
to myself. I married too young. Pretty much. The source

(58:05):
of the bitterness would come out when she talked like that.
When my dad was diagnosed with congested heart failure ooh
in twenty eighteen, I knew I only had a number
of years with him, although I am one of the youngest,
and I stayed the furthest away between forty eight hours.
I made it a point to focus on positive memories
with him and my mother, coming home on the weekends,
taking time off work to plan trips for us to take,

(58:26):
getting us all tickets to ballgames, just as having fun.
There were times I would disagree with my dad because
he was an older male with boomer tendencies, but at
the end of the day, petty disagreements wouldn't matter to me.
When my husband and I would come home and take
my parents to Top Golfer to dinner, it was always
my mother saying I shouldn't be doing this, and would
say because I shouldn't strain myself or put ourselves in

(58:48):
a difficult financial position. My husband and I never did,
and to us, family is super important, and it was
always easy to take the family to the aquarium because
we knew they'd have fun. But she would always push
back on me spending money on them, and it would
seem she would have to force herself to enjoy it. However,
if one of her sons were possessed enough to come
home and do something for them, she'd have to brag

(59:09):
to the whole town how great her kids were. Double standard.
In October of twenty twenty three, I told Dad I
was going to get us, me and Hobby, Dad and
Mom tickets for the Georgia Florida game for his sixtieth birthday,
the largest cocktail party of the year. I think it's
called he got so excited major George fan, that is
is GA Georgia.

Speaker 1 (59:27):
Is that something else, no GA's joj I wasn't sure
if it was like a team name Gay's joud.

Speaker 4 (59:32):
He literally screamed with joy. It was a great sight
to see. It's it's weird, I think, to have like
a partner who's soves so differently around like the kids
and someone who you know, like you have Op who's
super close to her dad, who seems like a great person,
and then the mom who's just seems pretty not great.
It's like, how do you as a partner not like
check your yeah?

Speaker 1 (59:52):
How do you how do you not feel that vibe
being inay?

Speaker 4 (59:55):
What are you doing?

Speaker 1 (59:55):
You know?

Speaker 4 (59:56):
Then my mother sunk her teeth into him when we
weren't around, and somehow took all the fun out of it,
telling him it would be too much of a financial
burden on me and my husband's shut up, this was false.
And then my dad calls a day or two later,
and I could hear the sadness in his voice saying
we should not buy the tickets and please don't buy
the tickets and he would just prefer to watch on TV.

(01:00:16):
And I told him it was genuinely no problem. Then
he told me that my mother had talked to him,
and she was making sense that it's too much to
spend on tickets. I was devastated that she did that,
not speaking with me, and just took experiences. I wanted
my dad to have away. Two months later he passed
away up. Dude, that's so sad, dude. I went to

(01:00:37):
the house to help out my mother for the next
couple weeks. The treatment of the daughters were the same.
We could tell we were not wanted around, and because
she has always treated the boys with tender love and care,
they never understood why our relationship with mother is much
different from theirs. Just seems like a lot of like
internalized misogyny against these daughters. I think shortly after the funeral,
she stopped talking to me. Even told the other siblings

(01:00:59):
that I was angry with her and not talking to her. Lies.
Although our relationship was me always seeking validation from her
and only getting disappointment from her, I still valued family
and tried to keep it close. I had been messaging
her for over a month and a half to no
response from her. I had been planning a vow renewal
with my husband, and because she has not been responding
to me, I sent her a message, not expecting one back,

(01:01:22):
asking if she would like to be put on the
guest list. She replied back saying she didn't need to
be on the guest list. I replied saying, if she
changes her mind, she will have a spot on the list.
She goes to tell her sons that I didn't want
to invite her, and she also said no to me
for me, oh low to bs. She just keeps lying.

Speaker 1 (01:01:38):
Yeah, it just lies upon lies upon lies lies.

Speaker 4 (01:01:42):
The distress of that situation contributed to one of the
worst asthma attacks I've had in my life just a
couple of days later.

Speaker 1 (01:01:49):
Is that can asthma can just be caused by distress?

Speaker 4 (01:01:51):
I thought.

Speaker 1 (01:01:51):
I thought it was like if something like got in
there and like started irritating.

Speaker 4 (01:01:55):
I guess so, yes, I had no idea. My lungs collapsed.
Oh my god. Well, and I had to be put
on a ventilater for a week. I didn't receive a
single call or text from her. April ninth, twenty twenty
four was the day I was supposed to pass away
according to the doctor. Wow, and your mom's not even there.

Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
I was going to say, yeah, this, it's very clear
that this this woman has very little to know love
for you.

Speaker 4 (01:02:18):
Yeah, like yeah, which is so sad, Like I can't
imagine having a partner who's so in love with these
kids and yeah, and the other partner is just so not.

Speaker 1 (01:02:26):
I mean, I guess it's like ying and yang, right,
is that? How that that's don't do that, though, don't
don't do that.

Speaker 4 (01:02:32):
Don't The entire family extended included new of my situation,
and my husband got calls and texts from cousins, aunts,
et cetera. My eldest brother or mother didn't bother. I
couldn't believe, even on my deathbed, I did not matter
enough to her. But you guys matter to us, and
we want you to join us live every weekday three
pmpst on YouTube, Facebook and TikTok and Twitch. Just top

(01:02:53):
her profile and there is a little bit left just
to TEENCB left meats lived.

Speaker 1 (01:02:58):
So I'm not I'll just say, like, I don't know
what I would want to hear in this situation, Like
it's got to be hard being left on your leaving
this earthly plane bed and you make it. But it's
like somebody who you I guess part of you had
to assume like Okay, well, she's got to like me
at least a little bit, but it's like she didn't

(01:03:19):
even come. You can there's I feel like there's You
can either like that's either gonna tear you down or
you can allow it to be like fuel to build
you up into like, you know.

Speaker 4 (01:03:28):
Focus on the people in your life that do care
about you, like your partner exactly, and your other family members.

Speaker 1 (01:03:33):
Don't need on this woman in your life, and her
presence or a lack thereof, has no bearing on your
worth or value as a person or your you know, uh,
because people just get mixed up. Parental figures get so messy. Yeah,
in our in our brains and in our hearts. But

(01:03:54):
it's like this person doesn't sound like in her heart
she was ever really apparent to you. So best to
just leave that in the past and onwards.

Speaker 4 (01:04:03):
And upwards, onwards and upwards. But there is a little
bit left to the story. I usually keep to myself
and never voice my opinion to family to avoid friction,
but I had just survived something I wasn't supposed to.
My eldest brother, thirty one male, said, I hurt his
feelings for calling him out like that. Who cares?

Speaker 1 (01:04:19):
Yeah, who cares.

Speaker 4 (01:04:20):
And he was upset because it took my husband two
days to tell them about my condition, and he knew
I was going to be okay, and that is why
he didn't call her text ridiculous And I need to
get over myself and stop ignoring mom. Wow, hope, he
literally just almost passed away and you're still acting like this. Yeah,
so you can throw this person out as well. Yeah,
I was baffled. I really just want to say ef

(01:04:40):
it to the whole lot of them. I texted my
mom the day I was discharged, and it's been a month,
and it's it's been a month and still no response.
I suppose I should get out of denial and understand
she doesn't want me in her life and she doesn't
deserve to the thing is that she doesn't deserve to
be in your life.

Speaker 1 (01:04:55):
Ooh, she does not deserve you. This is not anything.
You are not the wrong piece of the puzzle here.
She is a giant, stinky garbage bag of a person
who honestly black hole. Yeah, black hole for this person.

Speaker 4 (01:05:11):
Literally, just don't ignore her.

Speaker 1 (01:05:14):
M Yeah, I mean she and if she comes crawling back,
which people like this probably will, as she'll need something
and she'll feel like she might be able to get
it from you. Don't even respond. There's no point. She
is not And you know what, You can go out
and find a family of your choice that's called our friends.

(01:05:34):
You know your husband, and you can find there's also mentors,
and yeah, your husband and your husband's family.

Speaker 4 (01:05:39):
You know lots of other people in your life who
care about you. Yeah, but that is the end of
that story.