My sister-in-law was CHEATING on her partner… I secretly helped him move out! | Reddit Stories | EP2115 - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Sam, this is John. We're the ancient
two Case Storytime podcast hosts, and.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
We have some ancient wisdom in the stories coming up.

Speaker 1 (00:07):
If you want to hear the wisdom from two old
heads that know more than they know what to do with,
you're gonna have to wait for a quick message from
our sponsors for the next two minutes or so.

Speaker 3 (00:17):
My sister in law was cheating on her partner. I
secretly helped him move out.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
All right, his stuff on the curb pooh.

Speaker 3 (00:25):
About five years ago, I moved about fifteen hours away
from my hometown for a job. Shortly after moving, I
met my now wife, Becca, yep, wife Becca. A few
years ago I had a buddy Jr. From back home
come stay with me.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Buddy Jr.

Speaker 3 (00:40):
And OPII are living together, and while here he met
my wife's sister, Maggie.

Speaker 2 (00:46):
There we go, so Jr. And Maggie hit it off.

Speaker 3 (00:50):
They pretty quickly started dating. Maggie has a daughter from
a previous relationship. Daughter's dad is very much in the picture.
By the way, this comes from vast Base twenty two
seventy three and if you want to submit your own stories,
go to the r slash okay, storytime subreddits. So almost
a year ago, Maggie and JR. Moved in together.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
Oh it's getting serious. Getten roll serious.

Speaker 3 (01:15):
And speaking of which, how's how's how's the chart looking,
FAMMI chart is looking good?

Speaker 2 (01:20):
There we go.

Speaker 1 (01:21):
We got JR and Maggie in a relationship. Maggie has
a daughter and the daughter has a.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
Dad that is JR. Bingo. So Maggie is like the
sister in law right, opis sister.

Speaker 1 (01:30):
Maggie is a Becca, Yes, sister law, Becca's sister. Yes,
there we go, which is the wife of Op.

Speaker 4 (01:36):
Yes.

Speaker 3 (01:37):
So at the time sister in law, Maggie was living
with her parents, but she could not afford rent on
her own. Things seemed to be going along well. It
is a long story. But almost two months ago JR.
Got pretty irrefutable proof that Maggie was cheating on him.

Speaker 1 (01:51):
Ooh oh no, oh no, what was the proof? What
was the proof? Did he hear? Uh moans the walls.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
Ooh, that would not be fun proof.

Speaker 1 (02:00):
He picks.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
Oh, that's probably worse, which.

Speaker 1 (02:04):
Is where I would I would rather see spicy picks
than here, moans to the wall.

Speaker 2 (02:08):
Yeah. I guess it's like if it's like feeling it
live and direction.

Speaker 1 (02:12):
Yeah. Yeah, like everyone knows. The live experience is more,
it's a lot, it's more. It's just more.

Speaker 3 (02:18):
You don't you don't want the live in concert of
your partner cheating on you. Let's do the pre recorded. Also,
the dude that that thing was spitting out more than
Maggie was.

Speaker 1 (02:27):
Oh, Maggie, sorry.

Speaker 3 (02:30):
Sorry, our printer was was spitting prints. I can't help it.
So of course he was angry, depressed, and overall distraught.
He could not deal with confronting her, but he could
also not deal with living her, living with her, the
classic dilemma. Yeah, he talked to me and wanted my
help to get away. So I reach out to my
network of people who are not mutual friends of Becca

(02:52):
and I to get him a place to stay. Becca
sister in law, Maggie, and Maggie's daughter, and my mother
in law were going out of town to visit mother
in law's mom a few weeks.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
After he found out.

Speaker 3 (03:03):
Dude, op just confuses people the most confusing way possible.
Mother in law's mom, dude, come on, uh so, randma,
grandmon law, come on, grandmon law.

Speaker 2 (03:14):
I had a work friend with a rent house. I
helped JR.

Speaker 3 (03:17):
Pack his stuff, which is like ninety percent of the apartment,
and he moved out. He sent an email to Maggie
about why he left and moved out. He left a
check for rent utilities through the end of March when
their lease is up. Wow, great timing, dang, and informed
the landlord that he was not renewing super quick.

Speaker 2 (03:35):
Pause here, Was this a good move? Yes? Or no?
To just like leave email?

Speaker 1 (03:42):
I mean he wants to get out of I mean
I feel like he did a good job of like
making sure all of his bases are covered. Yes, in
terms of not screwing her over completely, but saying hey,
I'm not going to be here anymore.

Speaker 2 (03:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (03:53):
I think I think having a conversation would be good. Yeah,
because we've had a situations where we've discovered irrefutable evidence
but then turns out it was refutable that is true.
So I think usually just having a conversation first saying hey,
this is what I found out. I'm gonna leave, and
just giving the person a chance to respond, especially if

(04:16):
it's not like an abusive relationship.

Speaker 3 (04:18):
Yeah, I think that would be okay. Op, he says.
Maggie got the email and called JR numerous times. While
on the trip, my wife called me and asked what
was going on and where JR was. I told her
that JR moved out and he was safe, but I
will not tell her where he is. They got back
and Maggie flipped out about all of the stuff that
JR took. My wife was quite angry and demanded to

(04:39):
know where JR was. I kept telling her that he
is safe, but I am not telling her where he
is at the last month has been tense and my
wife has begged me and made threats to know where
JR is.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
This is like, I wonder what the threats are. Yeah,
like like no head for a week.

Speaker 2 (04:58):
I'm moving out and I'm not telling you.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
That's a little bit more than mine. Yeah, I don't know, dude.

Speaker 3 (05:05):
So she has even tried using my phone to impersonate
me to call JR and get information out of it.

Speaker 1 (05:11):
Hey, that that feels like a violation of the trust
of the relationship.

Speaker 3 (05:15):
Yeah, dude, it's it's checking the phone. It's like basically
same getting into the phone. I don't know that maybe worse.
I have since changed my past code. She says, we
are married. This is affecting my family. I deserve to know.
Tell me why I need to know, but I refuse.
She has even talked about this being divorceable. So am

(05:35):
I the ahole. We have edits, we have irrelevant comments,
we have updates. I'm pretty sure we've got so much
more left in the sword to dissect, but we we
have to answer this question.

Speaker 1 (05:49):
Is OP the I don't think so. I think he's
protecting He's protecting his friend Jr's privacy. I do think
JR should have had one final conversation with Maggie just saying, hey,
this is what I know. But I don't think that's
Ope's problem to deal with. I think all he's doing

(06:09):
is protecting the privacy of his friend. Doesn't sound like
JR stole anything that isn't his.

Speaker 3 (06:16):
You know, maybe that's debatable because like he's they said
he took ninety percent of stuff and Maggie was freaking out.
So I imagine there could be some crossover or something
that could have been a conversation meaning.

Speaker 1 (06:27):
Yeah, yeah, which again, like that's why Jay, I feel
like JR not saying anything yes about like what he's doing,
what he's taking, Like, I mean, you can't just if you,
let's say you co own certain stuff yep, and you
just leave. I mean you're effectively stealing whatever percentage ownership
that Maggie may have had, like if they bought a

(06:47):
couch together or whatever. Yeah, but all that to say
is it Ope's issue? Like No, I think I think
him protecting the privacy of JR.

Speaker 2 (06:56):
Is okay.

Speaker 1 (06:58):
And I think the fact the white is being so
so snoopy on the phone and like threatening divorce that
feels really unhealthy.

Speaker 3 (07:08):
Yeah, yeah, I'm I'm definitely seeing some red flags. But guys,
we got an edit. We've got some more more info.

Speaker 2 (07:15):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (07:16):
So number one, my wife knows why JR. Left, so
she knows about the cheating, which is good. Maggie has
admitted to the cheating since since he left. Point number three,
my wife denies knowing about the cheating, and I do
believe her. Historically, Maggie and Becka are not that close.
Prior to Jara moving here, we would see Maggie once
every maybe three months ish. Since Jarah moved, we see

(07:39):
her a lot more because JR and I regularly organized
get togethers, which is why my wife's reaction is so
surprising to me. It's like, hey, you weren't even like
that close. Why are you unreasonably defending her?

Speaker 2 (07:50):
You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 (07:50):
Yeah, I guess it makes me wonder And this is
conspiracy theory, but there's something that op his wife is
hiding that she think will be exposed by you know, JR.

Speaker 2 (08:05):
Leaving. Did Maggie poison the well? You know, she's like, hey,
I cheated, but x y Z And that's kind of
painting a reason why she's more in her corner.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
Yeah, I don't know, Yeah, hey, your family or like
I'm even wondering, like, you know, Maggie and Becca went
on some girl's bachelor trip and they both did something
naughty and Maggie like, Becca's worried that JR Is going
to tell Op. I don't know that. I feel like

(08:38):
that it's like that's a conspiracy theory.

Speaker 2 (08:39):
But it could be that that would explain the logic, yeah, or.

Speaker 1 (08:43):
And it'd be like it just feels like Opie's what
I guess. All I'm thinking right now is Op's wife
seems to have something to lose, which is why she's
acting so sus and I'm wondering what that is.

Speaker 3 (08:56):
Point number four of the stuff JR took was only
his stuff. In fact, a lot of stuff he left
is also a stuff. So we left some of his
stuff behind, even other than gadgets. He left all the
kitchen things despite it being one hundred percent his. He
left all of the stuff in my niece's room, even
though he had paid for a lot of it. And
there was no consensus. OPI basically received majority, not the ale.

Speaker 1 (09:18):
Which I think, not the holes I think. I think
we're in greement here.

Speaker 3 (09:21):
I agree, I agree, we got some relevant comments here.
So how did JR find out about Maggie's cheating, Opie
says text messages with her affair partner. Maggie freely admits
she was cheating, even admitted it in voicemails and text
messages to JR.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
After he sent the email. I wonder what no dispute
about that? Why was she so?

Speaker 1 (09:40):
I mean, I guess that's one green flag. Like if
you get a cheat, freely admit it.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
Just like okay, yeah, which so often we see people
just like try and it's like the jig is up.

Speaker 2 (09:49):
You might as well at least be honest about it now.

Speaker 1 (09:51):
So yeah, so hey, you know, one gold star for
me maybe like a.

Speaker 2 (09:57):
Point star, I mean, like one of the little arms.

Speaker 3 (10:00):
Yeah, did Jr. Take some of Maggie's stuff when he
moved out? Opie says, none of what we moved out
was her stuff. I helped him move in. It was
all his. There were big ticket items like the bed,
living room, TV couches, dining room table, but it was
all stuff that he had before he moved here. Much
of it he had before they even started dating. And

(10:20):
I guess that does leave her. She comes home, she's like, Okay,
well now I have no bed, I have no so
again maybe another point in the conversation.

Speaker 1 (10:27):
Yeah, yeah, I mean I think it's it's like she
might have agreed, like, hey, yeah, this is all your stuff,
but the fact that it's just all gone, there's an
emotional real Yeah. Yeah, she can plan a little bit more. Also,
just I mean like thinking about the kid, like the
kid is is uh and the kid comes back, he's like, Mom,
where's all of our crabit?

Speaker 2 (10:48):
Why do we live in a box? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (10:49):
Yeah, I feel like just thinking of the kid too.
You know, you want to you want to create a
nice transition for the kid.

Speaker 3 (10:55):
Commentary Number one says, I get the feeling that there
is info being left out, but I can't really put
my finger on what it is. I think so too,
So I'm gonna ask a few questions. Who is Maggie
cheating with? How old is Maggie's daughter? What's the long
term plan here? This guy is your best friend and
you just plan to keep him secret forever? Why is
your wife so invested? Does she feel that she got

(11:17):
closer with her sister since gr was there to get
everyone together, and now that he is gone, she fears
that she'll lose this closeness with her So maybe one
reason why she's defending her so much. Please ask your wife,
what would she say or do if she did know
where Jar is she plans to bully him into coming back?
Or what if Maggie was so dependent on this relationship?

(11:37):
Why did she cheat? Did she have a history of cheating?
And Opie responds to that.

Speaker 1 (11:43):
Interrogation, let's go okay, So who was the person a coworker?

Speaker 3 (11:49):
The affair partner was a coworker? Well, Jr. Is trying
to figure that out. He's considering whether he's gonna stay
here or move back home. He's not able to remain
in hiding forever, but right now this is the situation.
I suspect that in the next threeish months for him
to figure out what his plan is going to be.
In the meantime, I am not saying where he is
to my wife. Maggie was always the kid who could

(12:11):
not get her crap together.

Speaker 2 (12:13):
It annoyed Beca to no end. With JayR. Moving in,
it felt like Becca was getting her crap together.

Speaker 1 (12:18):
So maybe she's worried that, like Maggie's gonna fault like
fault pieces.

Speaker 2 (12:23):
And maybe that's also going to be her problem too.

Speaker 1 (12:26):
Yeah, that is That feels plausible. And so finally someone
took control of this mess of a person. I had
some rest and now it's like, oh, I'm gonna have
to go back into it.

Speaker 2 (12:36):
Back to it. Yeah, especially with the breakup.

Speaker 3 (12:38):
Now she is afraid things are going to revert. My
in laws are frustrated by that possibility too. They like JR.
And want to talk to JR. To see what they
can do to salvage the situation.

Speaker 2 (12:48):
Everyone wants JR.

Speaker 1 (12:49):
Back. It was like, oh, my god, you help this
family so much. Please you fumbled the back, We'll pay you.
Just take care of her.

Speaker 2 (12:58):
And what's the price. Jr.

Speaker 3 (13:00):
Is one of the nicest guys in the world and
does not want to upset them. Ultimately, they feel like
they have seen Maggie actually be a functioning adult and
are deeply afraid if JR. Leaves that she will just
stop doing that. Maggie's daughter is four years old. OPI
on the possibility of his wife cheating and Maggie covering
up for her.

Speaker 1 (13:19):
That's what we said. I feel like that this is
more of a stretch, yeah, than but hey, hey.

Speaker 2 (13:27):
I love a good hail Mary because when it lands, and.

Speaker 1 (13:29):
When at lands and lands, it.

Speaker 2 (13:31):
Feels so good for a half second, and it's so bad.

Speaker 1 (13:34):
I'm like, oh man, why am I right?

Speaker 2 (13:36):
We don't want it to be true.

Speaker 3 (13:38):
So Opie response, My wife and I have a life
three sixty. We work in office buildings next to each other.
That is how we met, and when we're not working,
we spend most of our time together. Could she be cheating, absolutely,
but it would be pretty difficult for her to do that.

Speaker 1 (13:53):
I mean, as Jeff Goldbloom says, life finds away life,
so it is cheating, you know.

Speaker 3 (14:00):
If OPI responds to a downvoted comment regarding getting involved
with JayR situation. I'm guessing maybe like getting after him
for like hiding in and protecting him.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
Opie says.

Speaker 3 (14:09):
On top of that, I think you got too involved
in a situation that doesn't really concern you. Opie says,
the situation does concern me. First, this is outside of
my brother, the man closest to me in the whole world. Second,
he has asked for my help in the situation. Third,
he was with Maggie at least in part at my
prompting and suggestion after they met via me. I'm not

(14:31):
saying you can't refer him to open housing or to
help him pack up, but I think helping him facilitate
all of the pre planning makes you look a little
bit of an a hole. You can't throw your hands
up now and say it's none of my business and
not my place to tell when you quite literally made
it your business by executing this big butt secret plan
with him.

Speaker 2 (14:52):
Everyone sucks. Here A just quick gut take on that,
do you?

Speaker 1 (14:56):
I mean?

Speaker 3 (14:56):
Maybe it's tough because there's so much.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
Yeah, it's like it's like, do you if you tell
your wife then she tells Maggie exactly, you know.

Speaker 2 (15:07):
I think she definitely would have done knowing her response.

Speaker 1 (15:10):
Now, if a friend comes to you and asks, hey,
I need your help, but please don't tell your wife,
what do you think about that? Dude? It's it is tough.

Speaker 3 (15:18):
It is I've honestly been buying time because it is.
It is really really hard.

Speaker 1 (15:25):
I think you could say, like, hey, I won't tell
her right now, but I do have to tell, like
tell my wife eventually, and then you tell your wife
and your wife is probably mad that you didn't talk
about it earlier.

Speaker 3 (15:36):
Maybe also you could be like, hey, listen, Jr's going
through some stuff. He has asked me to, uh, you know,
respect his privacy, and because of the situation, that's exactly
what I'm gonna do. So I'm I'm I'm telling you,
but I'm telling you I'm not going to tell you.

Speaker 2 (15:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:53):
I like. I like that. I like to tell I'm
not going to tell you.

Speaker 2 (15:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:55):
Maybe that's what op could have done to not be
the a hole to.

Speaker 3 (15:59):
His so Opie responds to this critique, I have no
idea where you see me saying it is quote unquote
none of my business. I am saying that I have
been asked to keep Jay's location confidential and I am
just doing that. Another comment should know he be concerned
about his niece's relationship with JR. Opie said, he did
tell her goodbye. He did not tell her to lie.

(16:19):
Of all people here, she is not upset with him
being gone. Her dad poisoned the well and told her
to keep her distance from him, and she generally did.
She's not upset at all that he's gone. So maybe, yeah,
maybe they didn't even have a good relationship. She doesn't care,
but I guess it doesn't affect her too. Commenter says,
if Maggie and Becca were not close, then why is

(16:40):
Becca so angry? If she knows that Maggie cheated, why
she's threatened divorce over it? Does she condone Maggie's behavior.
If she doesn't, then she would side with you and
respect Jayr's right to his privacy. At the very least,
she would stay out of it. This is why hooking
people up is so hard, because at some point you
will be choosing sides.

Speaker 2 (16:57):
Maggie cheated and will have to live with the consequences
of her action.

Speaker 3 (17:00):
And I would have a long talk with Becca about
her behavior and the stance that she took against you
and Jr.

Speaker 2 (17:05):
She chose a side with the cheater, which says a
lot about her character.

Speaker 3 (17:09):
You might want to check out what's been going on
with Becca that she would choose the side of a cheater.
When you side with a cheater, you might be one yourself.
Don't hold that against me. I don't agree with that.

Speaker 1 (17:18):
She's siding with her sister, you know, And I feel
like that's different than like, yes, like not the best
move because she did cheat, and I don't think that's
the side sheat should take. But she sided with her sister.

Speaker 3 (17:29):
I think, And maybe this wasn't mentioned. She should have
at least been condemning her in this process, being like, listen,
I know she f she totally fumbled the bag, but yeah,
you know.

Speaker 2 (17:38):
So you're not the a hole. But Becca and Maggie are. JR.

Speaker 3 (17:42):
Ghosted Maggie and that needs to be respected. He doesn't
want a confrontation and he doesn't want to hear her lies.
As a friend, you don't have the right to portray
his confidence, not even to your wife.

Speaker 2 (17:51):
Hope you responds to this.

Speaker 3 (17:52):
If Maggie and Becca were not close, why was Beca
so angry If she knows that Maggie cheated while she's
starting divorced.

Speaker 2 (17:58):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (17:58):
Becca's tendency went it's the fan is for for anything,
is to go into fix it mode. She is an
engineer by training. She gets incredibly angry at anything she
perceives as in the way of fixing the problem, issue, bug,
et cetera. It's her default belief that anything can be fixed.
So she thinks what Maggie did is very crappy, but
there's no way to undo it, so why fix it

(18:20):
on it? She thinks the only productive thing to do
now is try and fix it. She thinks she can
fix it. I am telling her, no, you can't, and
in her mind, I am stopping her from fixing it,
so she's very pissed at me for that. We have
an update a month and a half later. Whoa, I
am guessing we might have some reveals on where jer Jr.

Speaker 2 (18:39):
Is at.

Speaker 3 (18:39):
Maybe some communication finally starts happening between JR and Maggie.

Speaker 1 (18:44):
Which would be great. I mean, I'm curious what Chat
thinks about OHP not telling his wife Jr's secrets.

Speaker 3 (18:54):
Maybe maybe a poll tell whife or n Yeah, yeah,
I'm very curious too, and also quick thoughts on You know,
Opie has the reasoning for like why the wife is
basically like, I guess frustrated with him, but I feel like, yes,
we have the logic and reasoning behind it, but it's
not a good behavior. It's not it's not it's not
worthy of threatening divorces. Like, oh, you're getting in the

(19:15):
way of me fixing the problem. That's that's how you
are perceiving.

Speaker 1 (19:18):
Yeah, I mean I think he is like trying to
give her the benefit of the doubt as much as possible. Yeah,
but I do think it's it's pretty toxic behavior on
the wife's part, and like, although OPI understands it, I
don't know if it should be excused.

Speaker 3 (19:35):
But we're gonna get into this update a month and
a half later. By the way, this happened just a
week ago. This is this is fresh a lot of
the pole. So weeks after the post, Becca let it
slip that I knew where JR.

Speaker 2 (19:49):
Is located.

Speaker 3 (19:50):
This caused a slew of intimidation from Maggie and my
mother in law. I refuse to tell him where he is.
Some choice words were exchanged between Maggie and.

Speaker 1 (19:57):
I don't think that Becca Opie's wife did it accidentally?
I think she leaked it on with.

Speaker 2 (20:02):
Us, yeah, let it slip.

Speaker 1 (20:04):
Yeah, yeah, I think it was intentional. That's pretty messed
up on the wife's part.

Speaker 2 (20:08):
Yeah. So I told Maggie she's not allowed in my
house until she apologizes to me.

Speaker 3 (20:13):
She refuses, So I have not seen her or my
in laws in about a month. Since the end of
March twenty twenty five, Maggie has been living again with
my in laws. Becca tried to get me to agree
to let Maggie and my niece move in.

Speaker 1 (20:28):
I really don't think that's a good idea, but.

Speaker 3 (20:31):
I refused based on the conflict that I have with
Maggie and Beca's behavior the last couple of months. Becca
explained to me why she has been behaving the way
she has the last couple of months. Okay, are we
going to see is there a reason that explains Maggie
is cheating and all that.

Speaker 2 (20:45):
Is it all going to be explained?

Speaker 3 (20:46):
Like?

Speaker 2 (20:46):
Oh yeah, of course.

Speaker 1 (20:48):
The thing though, is it's like it does it feel
like Becca is changing at a year of her behavior? No,
it's still I want to tell you why I have
been like being so terrible The last couple of months
and will continue to be. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (21:02):
Yeah, I feel like it's giving the same thing as before. Op.

Speaker 3 (21:05):
He's like, oh, my wife, just like anytime someone gets
in the way of her fixing the problem, she gets mad.

Speaker 2 (21:09):
It's like, yeah, that's not good.

Speaker 1 (21:11):
That shouldn't be excused.

Speaker 3 (21:12):
Yeah, Maggie's X has said that if Maggie moves back
in with my in laws, he's gonna go for full
custody of my niece h so that he's gonna take
the kid away from not just Maggie, but the whole
side of the family.

Speaker 2 (21:26):
Right has the potential.

Speaker 1 (21:28):
Yeah, I mean, like, ca can he do that? I mean,
is it? I feel like living with your parents isn't
necessarily hostile.

Speaker 2 (21:36):
I guess. I guess you could argue she doesn't have,
you know, a place to live like I have. I
have everything. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (21:43):
Now, the neighborhood where my in laws live in is rough,
and there's a fair bit of conflict between Maggie and
my father in law since moving back in. My niece's
dad's lawyer, so the dad has reached out and indicated
that they are going for full custody. Becca is blaming
me and Jr. For I mean, that's not fair at all,
is dude. I don't know Maggie created this situation. It

(22:06):
feels like this is not a stable environment for a kid. No,
it doesn't feel that Becca is that great of with
this story.

Speaker 1 (22:14):
I'm not getting a lot of confidence that she's a
grand mom.

Speaker 3 (22:16):
Opie says she is convinced that if they knew he
was leaving, they could work something out to keep them together,
or at least keep Maggie in the apartment.

Speaker 2 (22:25):
I do not think this is the case at all.

Speaker 3 (22:27):
By the way, you can listen to full episodes of
stories just like this, Ladies and gentlemen.

Speaker 2 (22:32):
More hot tea for you.

Speaker 1 (22:32):
Just going to.

Speaker 2 (22:33):
Spotify, Apple our iHeart podcast app and search.

Speaker 3 (22:36):
Okay, story time, we got two thousand episodes of juicy
stories to listen to.

Speaker 2 (22:40):
But we're going to dive right in to the ending here.
So JayR.

Speaker 3 (22:44):
Is still processing, but was willing to speak to Maggie now.
So we're finally getting some communication. So he reached out
a couple of weeks ago. This past weekend, Maggie Jr.
Spoke via FaceTime. Maggie wanted an in person meeting, but
Jay Are absolutely refused Maggie apologized and try to get Jr.
To reconsider for my daughter for the step daughter.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
Jr refused, which understandable. Yeah, Jay is trying to preserve
his peace. Yeah, yeah, you didn't make this mess. And
they're not even married, like his daughter doesn't like him,
like yeah, I mean there's nothing, there's nothing for him.

Speaker 3 (23:19):
It's all kind of like selfishly and Maggie's yes, I
feel like everything. Maggie had an emotional outburst. Jar hung
up on her. There's no plan for him to speak
to her again. We got some relevant comments. So was
Maggie on the least with Jr? Opie says she was
on the least. She did not qualify for the apartment
on her own and cannot meet the qualifications. The situation

(23:41):
between my in laws and Maggie was contentious before she
moved in with Jar. I don't know if my niece's
dad will win the custody battle, but what I do
know is that one my niece has expressed being scared
at my in law's house.

Speaker 2 (23:53):
Again. It was like, it's not unsafe neighborhood. They said,
oh that sucks.

Speaker 1 (23:56):
Yeah, dude, I mean, hey, that that I feel like
that's that's enough. That's a big indicator.

Speaker 2 (24:01):
Dude.

Speaker 3 (24:01):
Number two, Maggie cannot afford to fight him on custody.
And three, generally, the quote unquote best interest of the
child is the standard in our state, and the living
situation with her.

Speaker 1 (24:10):
Dad's a great standard.

Speaker 2 (24:12):
Yeah, it's a good standard. It's a good standard.

Speaker 3 (24:14):
And Opie says the living situation with her dad would
be significantly better. So I think what we're saying assuming
is right. He's kind of like economic much.

Speaker 1 (24:21):
Better this kid away from Maggie.

Speaker 2 (24:23):
I mean.

Speaker 3 (24:23):
Commenter says, your wife is delusional. Do not let Maggie
move in. She will never move out. Commentary number two says,
Maggie fed up. Maggie continues to f up, and Becca
is trying to make Maggie's f ups your problem or Jr's,
and it's neither. You don't need to take care of
Maggie and her kid because she has an active father
who likely has a valid reason to be upset about

(24:43):
the current situation. Maybe Maggie having no custody will wake
her up because all of this is through her own actions.

Speaker 2 (24:50):
She had a good guy and she cheated.

Speaker 3 (24:52):
She can't take care of herself and her kid and
her parents have issues with her. The common denominator is Maggie. Yeah,
you need to have a conversation with your wife that
this isn't your problem and you don't want to make
it your problem. Becca needs to recognize that Maggie has
been her own worst enemy. If and Becca needs to
figure out if she wants to keep that BS drama

(25:14):
in her life, you can easily walk away and that's
a conversation that should come up. And comment your number
three closes us out, not the ahole, And honestly, you've
been the only.

Speaker 2 (25:22):
Adult in the situation. Becca. Blaming you and JR.

Speaker 3 (25:25):
For Maggie's custody issues is wild, considering Maggie's own choices
blew up her life, JR. Owes her nothing, and the
fact that she tried to emotionally manipulate him for your
daughter quote unquote.

Speaker 2 (25:36):
Is so gross.

Speaker 3 (25:37):
Like your daughter deserves love, not guilt leverage relationships. You
set boundaries, stuck to him, and protected someone who needed
space to heal. That's not portrayal, that's loyalty with a spine.

Speaker 1 (25:49):
Yeah, I mean shadow pe for sticking to their guns
and sticking to their morals. Not easy when like it
seems like everyone is against you, making you feel crazy. Yes,
I'll be like wait, literally he's coming to Reddit because
he's like, wait, am I crazy? Am I doing something
wrong here?

Speaker 2 (26:05):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (26:06):
Because everyone in his life, like I mean, his wife, Becky, Maggie,
the parents are all being like, dude, what are you doing?

Speaker 3 (26:13):
It's a strong reality to force it when you have literally,
you know, three, four, five, six people in your life
all telling one thing.

Speaker 2 (26:20):
It is hard tord you know, staying and you're like.

Speaker 1 (26:24):
Wait, maybe I am wrong. But shout out Reddit for
for setting setting the record straight. Yeah, so we love
to see but that's where that story ends. That's right,
But not this episode. Not this episode. We got another
one for you're going to get it right into.

Speaker 2 (26:39):
Give it to me.

Speaker 1 (26:40):
My husband wants to have a baby with another woman.

Speaker 2 (26:43):
Uh, it's gonna be our baby, babe.

Speaker 1 (26:47):
Also trigger warning loss of pregnancy. But let's get into
the story. So I'm honestly in a bit of a
shock after everything that has transpired in the past twenty
four hours and need some unbiased opinions to get me
through a little back. My significant mother and I have
been married for four years and together for seven he's
a civil engineer who is more so ambivalent to his career.

(27:08):
His real passions lie and his hobbies, our relationship and
his friends.

Speaker 2 (27:12):
That's pretty cute, yea.

Speaker 1 (27:13):
I am an emergency medicine doctor and this is my passion.
By the way, this comes from doctor Mick Puffy And
if you want us to get your own stories, go
to our slash Okay storytime. So I write it. So
I love my husband, my friends, and I have hobbies,
but my work is my passion.

Speaker 2 (27:31):
Ooh.

Speaker 1 (27:31):
Becoming a doctor was my dream since I was twelve,
and I have made it a reality. Now my issue.
About fourteen months ago, my husband was pushing me to
get pregnants. He wanted a baby.

Speaker 2 (27:43):
Ooh. He was pushing and he was pumping.

Speaker 1 (27:46):
I honestly did not ope. He did not want the pump.

Speaker 2 (27:49):
Ooh.

Speaker 1 (27:50):
I was finally hitting my stride at work. We had
just bought our first condo together and we weren't living
a really kid friendly life. I did not tell him
this because I was a coward and we have never
really disagreed before. So I kept my mouth shut and
decided it wouldn't be a huge sacrifice to have a baby.
I could make it work.

Speaker 3 (28:08):
Op, Op, what do we always say, John, communicate early,
and often.

Speaker 1 (28:14):
Communicate early, and often especially about something as big as
a kid.

Speaker 2 (28:19):
Dude, and she's carrying it.

Speaker 3 (28:22):
Yeah, I mean that that is like it's it's already
like a big conversation about having a kid. But if
you have to carry this baby and you're like unsure
about that is so much pressure on you that you
don't that you deserve the right to be able.

Speaker 1 (28:35):
To And hey, maybe this is maybe this is a
hot take, but I think if you're not sure you
want a kid, you should not have a kid.

Speaker 2 (28:44):
I think I can get behind that.

Speaker 1 (28:45):
Obviously, accidents happen, Fia.

Speaker 2 (28:48):
Hey that's true. Accidents do happen.

Speaker 1 (28:51):
Yeah, accidents happen, and people change their minds all the time.
But like, like, I think in this case, it feels
like Op was actively unsure yeah, and then yeah, and
then decided to just go ahead and plan. And I
think all sorts of weird things can happen if you
just force yourself into having a kid. We got pregnant.
I was miserable. Oh, pregnancy did not suit me and

(29:14):
I wanted it to be over. I felt disconnected from everything,
especially my pregnancy and I sought out therapy. My therapist
told me that I was holding resentment against this baby,
and I was in a great spot in my career
and was more worried about that than my unborn child.
He was right. I worked on this and by month six,
I was really excited to have this baby. We turned that.

(29:36):
We turned that around, hopefully, hopefully.

Speaker 2 (29:39):
Yeah, man, I'm I'm nervous.

Speaker 1 (29:40):
Hey, all right, I mean we're I think we're in
a good, good place. We're in a good place. My
husband and I were in a better place. My resentment
and attitude really hurt our relationship during this time, and
everything was going well until it wasn't here. We go
around seven months and I had some horrible complications that
have caused my chances of ever getting pregnant being incredibly low.

(30:01):
I know that I am never getting pregnant. After the
initial shock, recovering from the physical trauma and the emotional trauma,
I won't lie. I felt relieved, massive relief. I didn't
want to be a mother then, but I will down
the road. I am a firm believer that this was
just not meant to be. But my husband took it
harder with some therapy. Though on both our ends, we
seem to be in a good spot until last night, and.

Speaker 3 (30:20):
So to clarify it, basically seems like there was a mischaracter.

Speaker 1 (30:24):
He lost the baby. He lost the baby. Last night
my husband approached me. He said that he really wants
us to have a kid, and Ford gives me, Oh,
no for losing hours.

Speaker 4 (30:36):
Oh son, forgive me for losing my temper right now?

Speaker 2 (30:43):
Oh that is so bad.

Speaker 1 (30:45):
How do you say something like that?

Speaker 2 (30:48):
That is so so bad? Oh?

Speaker 1 (30:54):
Maybe maybe he'll recover in the second. How let's see.
He knows that I cannot conceive, but reminded me that
he is more than capable that that. Babe, I know
you're inferle but this sperm, this freaking Michael Phelps of
the sperm over here.

Speaker 2 (31:11):
I see you. I know where we're heading.

Speaker 1 (31:12):
I also I see the up. If we want a baby,
then we need to look into adoption or getting donated
eggs and going the surrogacy route. Right now, we aren't
in a financial position for that either. Then he asks,
what if there was another way?

Speaker 3 (31:28):
Due this is like this is like an infomercial, like
where it's like you are you tired of trying to
get you know baby by IVF Surreyviuni adoption.

Speaker 1 (31:38):
Have you tried cheating on your wife? Just ask her,
but with less steps you don't need an ask for
your wife's permission.

Speaker 2 (31:46):
Surrogacy, that's Surga free.

Speaker 1 (31:49):
Yeah. Oh boy, naturally asked what he told me. I
literally was about to say, like, oh, yeah, this is
a girl from work. He told me that there was
a woman at work that he has known for several years.
Apparently she knows all about our marital problems and knows
all about my health issues over the past years. He

(32:09):
says that they recently went to drinks together. Bro. Again again,
I just want to position this. This is real. This
is like very recently after she lost her pregnancy. So first,
he says, hey, I forgive you for losing the pregnancy.

Speaker 2 (32:27):
Crazy.

Speaker 1 (32:27):
Second, I was as fertile as a as a as
a a bison in spring. And third, I just confessed
all of her marital problems to this haudio work that
I had drinks with and I want to hook up
with her for us.

Speaker 2 (32:43):
Bro, this is so bad.

Speaker 1 (32:47):
Wow, he said, they recently went to drinks together. I
was at an overnight shift and after a few drinks,
she offered to not only donate eggs, but to be
our surrogate. This seems too good to be true, right,
She's like, we can.

Speaker 4 (33:03):
Even skip the donating eggs part.

Speaker 2 (33:06):
Yeah, we can just go right to the source.

Speaker 1 (33:09):
Right to the sort. Hey, you know yeah, And in fact,
we we knew you would be okay with it. So
after drinks, we did a little surrogacy session, you know, say,
a little little prep.

Speaker 2 (33:19):
We why why would we make you wait?

Speaker 1 (33:22):
Yeah, you know what I mean? And you know it's
so expensive, it's so expensive.

Speaker 2 (33:25):
We wanted to get the process start now.

Speaker 3 (33:27):
And you know we might have to do it many
times for me, you know, you know, you know strike,
you know.

Speaker 1 (33:32):
Strike like the baby. But don't worry, I Am going
to put in.

Speaker 2 (33:35):
The work every single day.

Speaker 1 (33:37):
She will only do this if my husband impregnates her
the natural way, having spicy sleep with her during her
ovulation period until she gets pregnant. I was baffled by this.

Speaker 2 (33:53):
It's so obvious. This is just this is just cheating.
This is literally just cheating.

Speaker 1 (33:57):
He's trying to find a loophole and it and he's.

Speaker 3 (34:00):
Still like, like he hasn't checked in with her and
been like because think about it she just lost a kid,
she could probably have so many complicated emotions.

Speaker 1 (34:06):
Or literally not checking her once. First he was considering
it and seemed genuinely excited for this. Yeah, I'm sure
he was. Second, that this woman would offer such a
thing without ever having met me, and finally that he
had shared such intimate details with her. Yes, he said that.
He then followed up with her when they were both
sover via text, and she responded, Oh, I would love

(34:29):
to have your baby. It just keeps getting worse, okay,
really quick, keeps getting worse, is there? I mean, I
feel like this is just like a Lily Pat hoppin.
I feel like he's just trying to hop to the
next thing.

Speaker 3 (34:40):
That is a great point, and Irish Gigs in chat
just made an incredible point to what she's all already.

Speaker 4 (34:49):
Yeah, a lot of people are saying that in chat.

Speaker 3 (34:51):
Oh, and they're trying to slide through.

Speaker 2 (34:55):
And get away with it.

Speaker 1 (34:57):
Oh my god.

Speaker 3 (34:57):
The one thing I'll say against that, though, is I
am imagine she would just be like, unless she's just
an absolute just insane person, she would say, hey, we
can still do like you know, basically either the Turkey
base or you know, we don't have to do natural
you know, not natural or whatever.

Speaker 1 (35:11):
Yeah, yeah, this seems odd to me, and I questioned
the mental stability of this woman. But then my husband's
entire demeanor shocks me. I told him I wasn't sure
about this.

Speaker 2 (35:20):
Yes, you are sure about it. I'm sure that.

Speaker 1 (35:24):
Yeah, oh pie, you could say no.

Speaker 2 (35:28):
You can say no if.

Speaker 1 (35:30):
We go the surrogate route. I would prefer it to
be all anonymous in our surrogate, to be a stranger.
I don't want this getting messy or having to worry
about running into the egg donor instead of seeing the
validity of my opinions. He told me that having a
baby with him was non negotiable. Wait what he told
me that having a baby with him was non negotiable.
That this friend wants to help us. You wouldn't mind

(35:53):
doing it her way, and it would be the most
cost efficient since we just discussed how we cannot afford
it at this time. He told me that if I
love him and want a baby, then I will do
this for him.

Speaker 4 (36:03):
Dude, She's like, no, no, no, you know I think that
you're thinking about it in mins for my sake. I
don't mind, because you were worried that I would. I
don't mind.

Speaker 1 (36:11):
I really don't mind. In fact, you know, I want
you with a camquarder for we can live this out
for many moons to come. I try to explain to
him that I am not sure if I am ready
for this, and I don't know if I am comfortable
with all this, especially with him sleeping with someone else.
He brushed that off. I mean, no big deal if
you were to sleep with her, And then I'm overreacting

(36:31):
that he stood by while I got my dream and
he was left alone slash ignored. I never knew he
felt this way, and then I owed it to him
to let him do this. Today, I looked this woman
up on Facebook and she is, Hey, Sam, we're gonna
get back to the stories, but here's three minutes of
bads from our sponsors. Very attractive.

Speaker 2 (36:52):
Oh man.

Speaker 1 (36:53):
I would say that my husband and I are both
average looking, but she is definitely striking, which makes my
anxiety go even higher.

Speaker 2 (37:01):
Yeah yeah, WHOA, Why are we doing this?

Speaker 1 (37:05):
Why do this for us? I don't get what she
gets out of this. Am I overreacting? This seems completely
bizarre to me, and I'm questioning everything in our relationship.
What should I do? We got some cop we got
some updates, but John, yes, sir, what should OPI do?

Speaker 3 (37:23):
I know that OP struggles with confrontation, confrontation and being honest.
I think because of the severity of the scenario, I'm
getting worried that husband's just gonna kind of bold thoze
his way through this. Maybe she could do something like
get like a counselor or something and talk to them
and be like, hey, can you help me, like like

(37:46):
tell him how I really feel, and like get this,
get this all together. And I think too by proxy
of that, the counselor will be like, oh, like hey,
this sucks, this is terrible, and he said, you know,
oh this is non negotiable. Great, then the deal is off.
Our our deal of like us being committed to each
other is done. If you're not gonna be able.

Speaker 2 (38:08):
To even talk about any of these ridiculous things are
trying to make me.

Speaker 1 (38:10):
I mean, uh, I would you say the relationship is over?

Speaker 2 (38:14):
She? I think she has to leave?

Speaker 1 (38:16):
Yeah, I think, like to your point, like the counselor
is just a way for her to understand that.

Speaker 2 (38:24):
To realize that.

Speaker 3 (38:25):
Yeah, and hopefully you know, I think this will be
a good experience for her to learn the voice, the
voice she deserves to have.

Speaker 1 (38:32):
Yeah, exactly, stand.

Speaker 2 (38:33):
Up for herself.

Speaker 1 (38:34):
Yeah, yeah, and like this is like one of the
first ways she can train herself to like do that. Yes,
but we got some comments, we got some updates, so comments,
are you sure she's not already pregnant? And so we asked,
let's be asked, Well, I don't think she is. He
told me that they mapped out her cycles and insinuated
that I could help figure out when is best for her,
and that we could aim for a January insemination date

(38:57):
so that we could have a fall baby. There is
no way that she is already pregnant, assuming six plus weeks,
they could fool me with a fall baby. And reply,
this is so gross and appropriate, Opie says. It is
the fact that he has conversations with her about her
population cycles, which we didn't even talk about when we
were trying to conceive, is grossly inappropriate. That didn't even
hit me until I started reading some of the comments

(39:18):
and we have the update.

Speaker 3 (39:20):
I'm so afraid everything out of this man's mouth is pure,
utter hot steaming.

Speaker 2 (39:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (39:27):
I don't know why he just doesn't you know, go
to her, believe leave just leave.

Speaker 2 (39:33):
There there's the door, Yeah, you can walk out of
it and just just just just just go.

Speaker 1 (39:38):
I just see. It feels like there's such resentment from
him to OPI.

Speaker 3 (39:43):
It's it's almost like he wants to like hold this
over her and you have like give you you know.
He he he's just like relishing in the in the
the pain that it he's causing.

Speaker 2 (39:58):
Op.

Speaker 1 (39:58):
It feels like, yeah, dude, it feels like he wants
to punish her. Yeah, yeah, you're right. But we got
an update.

Speaker 2 (40:04):
Let's go. So.

Speaker 1 (40:05):
I spoke with my husband on Tuesday, after he got
home from work and before I had to leave for work.
I explained to him that even though I do want
kids down the road, I would not be comfortable with
this friend being our surrogate and that this would not
change for me ever. Yes, foot down, but do you
think we're gonna let's see if you'll we'll actually move

(40:27):
forward with them, maybe another foot down, or maybe a
retreat away from the relationship. All of it made me
uncomfortable and honestly made me question his fidelity. He was
shocked by this. The exact words were are you saying
that I cheated on you. I laid it out for him,
pointing out a lot of things that were pointed out
to me from my original post, and stated that even

(40:49):
if he hadn't yet physically cheated, he emotionally cheated. He
said that he did have an emotional connection with her,
but beyond that nothing else. I asked if they had
spicy sleeping, anything spicy related at all. He was baffled
that I would even think this and adamant he did
not have any spicy related contact with her. He reiterated
that he loves me and I am the only one

(41:11):
he wants. The whole idea of this was because he
wanted to give us a family and help repair the loss.
This was just a way to do that, and he
never saw it as cheating because it would be something
we both would agree to. I told him that isn't true,
because he emotionally manipulated me, or tried to and going
along with it. I told him I needed to know
what their relationship was like. He admitted that over the

(41:33):
past year, even while I was pregnant, he confided in
her about my obvious lack of interest in the pregnancy
and my disdain toward motherhood, So he did know and
kind of just forced Op to continue in this path.
Not surprised, And again it's like, I don't I think
it is terrible that he forced Ope to do that,

(41:54):
but also I know he already said this, Like I
think Ope needs to learn to stand up for herself
so she never gets in a situation like that.

Speaker 4 (42:01):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:02):
Yeah, and she's doing a.

Speaker 2 (42:02):
Much better job. Big progress. And how she's talking right now, it.

Speaker 1 (42:06):
Might disdain towards motherhood, his fear of me hating our
baby and the issues that persisted in our relationship. Apparently
she was shocked and I would feel this way towards
a baby. She told him that she has only ever
wanted to be a mother. Since then, they have only
gotten closer, but he denies it has ever gotten physical
or that he has felt any romantic inclinations towards her.

(42:26):
I don't know. He said that the surrogacy was completely
her idea and she has been hinting at it for weeks. Yeah,
tell him how she would carry our baby for us,
how he deserves to be a dad. But informed her
that we did not have any frozen eggs or options
or egg donation or adoption, which we couldn't afford. No problem,
she suggested using her eggs, which is how the plan

(42:48):
took shape of conspiracy theory. Conspiracy theory. She wants a
baby and wants a donor, sperm donor, and wants to
keep the baby, and this is her way of manipulating
Opie's husband into giving a sperm donation so she can
have her own baby, because she's only ever wanted to
be a mother.

Speaker 3 (43:09):
She's like, this is this is my way through, this
is my way to get it, and it's cheap, it's free,
and it's free, and he'll he'll do it.

Speaker 1 (43:16):
Cheryl Emerson says she will not give up the baby. Yeah.
I think she won't give up the baby. I don't
even know she's fully interested in op Maybe she just
sees a little sperm sperm yeah, baby opportunity.

Speaker 4 (43:26):
Well were you gonna say, Sophia, I doesn't really matter
whether or not he likes her, sees her in a
romantic light, which I think is a lie anyway. Yeah,
but she's clearly into him or like has some other
ulterior motives.

Speaker 3 (43:40):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's there's something, Yeah, some sort of
connection that is not not right here.

Speaker 1 (43:46):
Like they're not even I don't think they're close enough
enough friends, like for this to be a platonic friend thing. Yeah, yeah,
like agreing with Sophia. Either it's romantic or she wants
to kid herself.

Speaker 3 (43:59):
Yeah, just I don't know, man, just telling about like
her the medical things, and I don't know.

Speaker 2 (44:05):
It's just such a betrayal of trust on it.

Speaker 1 (44:08):
Oh, it is a huge betrayal of just for sure.
He said that they could do artificial incumination, but she
said she didn't want medical records of this, and natural
insummination would keep cost down.

Speaker 4 (44:18):
Yeah, she didn't want medical records. She didn't want any
kind of like documentation that would say that she had
to give up the child.

Speaker 2 (44:26):
Yeah mmm.

Speaker 1 (44:27):
I asked him what the f he was thinking talking
to her about stuff like this and thinking that this
was okay. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights.
I asked him how he would feel if I did this,
if he was the infertile one and I had an
attractive doctor friend knock me up with no strings attached
at his suggestion, how would he feel he had nothing

(44:48):
to say to this?

Speaker 3 (44:49):
There you go, There you go, John, Here og host.
We're gonna get back to these stories, but a quick
three minute break from hous from our sponsors.

Speaker 1 (44:55):
I told him that I felt absolutely betrayed by all
of this. Clearly she has some sort of mental health
problems and an unhealthy attachment to my husband, but beyond that,
his relationship with her is in appropriate. He said, Obviously
I shared too much. I told him that I am
upset that he forgave me his quote for the loss
for a baby, which I had no control over, and

(45:16):
that he used that to emotionally manipulate me. He apologize
for that, He never meant it to come out like
that and in no way blames me. After that, everything
calmed down, but I told him I needed some space
from him for a bit. He asked if our marriage
was over. I wonder if he wants that he.

Speaker 2 (45:34):
Wants her to do it.

Speaker 4 (45:35):
He's like, ah, it's your marriage over.

Speaker 1 (45:40):
You're telling me I have to go impregnate the super
hot worker.

Speaker 3 (45:43):
Oh shut dude, Yeah he's doing He's trying to do
everything he can to like push her to the edge.

Speaker 2 (45:50):
You're like, hey, I did always see.

Speaker 1 (45:52):
Because also you know, it's it is hard to break
up with your partner. It's much easier to like have
them do it the worst and just pushed them away.

Speaker 3 (46:01):
And him it's almost like, looking back on it now,
it's almost like, oh, all of these things he do
he's doing almost seems strategic to where it's like, yes,
it'll it will just push her to the brink of
wanting to her initiate the breakup.

Speaker 2 (46:15):
But I mean, he still looks like a bad guy.
But it's like, oh, I.

Speaker 1 (46:18):
Didn't cheat, or you know, I didn't do X y Z. Yeah,
I told him I didn't think so. But this has
been really emotionally turbulent a few days and I need
to process it. I think that's fair. I think her
processing and taking time is she shouldn't make any like
split second reactions. He told me that he doesn't want
our marriage to be over if this was something I

(46:39):
was considering. He loves me more than anything and cannot
bear to lose me over this. That losing our baby
was devastating and has made him depress, confused, and angry.
But he does not want to lose me at all,
which you know might be true. You know, like people
when they're depressed and confused and angry make terrible decisions.
Maybe this is is a short term lined ness.

Speaker 4 (47:01):
I don't think so, because even before they lost the baby,
he was acting like this.

Speaker 1 (47:06):
Well, I think I think he's just been so focused
on having a kid that he's like ignoring her feelings
and just trying to steamroll to this like goal.

Speaker 2 (47:15):
Of his Yeah. I think.

Speaker 3 (47:16):
I think the evidence stacked is so so damning that
it's like you just you just you can't trust that
he won't do things to hurt you at this point.

Speaker 2 (47:28):
It's so much evidence.

Speaker 1 (47:30):
A lot of his behavior has been really hurtful.

Speaker 4 (47:33):
Yeah, I don't think this relationship can like laugh, I
think he needs to get therapy, not to save this relationship,
but to fix MYSELFLF.

Speaker 2 (47:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (47:42):
Yeah, I told him he should not have thought about
that before planning to stick his wiener in crazy. I
told him that if he wants to keep open communication,
he needs to get ties with her. Obviously he works
with her, but nothing beyond whatever work contact they have
to have. He needs to go to individual counseling and
come to at least one counseling session with me per week.
Before he left, he changed his phone number, blocked her

(48:04):
on Facebook, and deactivated it He told me that he
would give me access to whatever I wanted to see
to prove that the relationship was severed and that it
was nothing more than what he told me. His parting
words were I just want to build a family with you,
which absolutely gutted me. Wednesday afternoon, I checked his email.
There was nothing, nothing deleted bin or recovered, deleted out items,

(48:25):
and outlook. Facebook was hard to look at. There were
a lot of chat messages between the two of them
spanning the last eight months when he added her on Facebook. Overall,
his messages were friendly. A few times he was flirty,
but never spicy, related or what I would consider too
much for what should be friends. But hers were pretty
clear in her meaning. The messages are clear she's making
some kind of play for him. I took screenshots of

(48:48):
all the conversations. Don't worry. I triple checked for any
deleted messages, hidden app or other messaging services, and re
deactivated his Facebook. I have his iPad ipadd They never
remember to delete the messages on the iPad.

Speaker 2 (49:03):
I've had to tell you.

Speaker 1 (49:06):
How many relationships have been destroyed for better Yeah, because
an I've had caught them red handed like so many.

Speaker 2 (49:18):
Oh, shout out Steve jobs Man.

Speaker 1 (49:20):
Well, I have his iPad and it was able to
look at the messages on there. They appeared to Elite
every thirty days, which left me with that to look at. Overall,
the text and chats line up with his story, but
the whole exchange about the logistics makes me sick. She
talks about making a baby as though it's a date,
that she doesn't want it to be sterile or feel
like she's being used. Her comments were inappropriate, but he

(49:41):
never stopped her or corrected her. She even insulted me
several times when he expressed concern about how I would feel,
saying things like she's cold hearted and maybe you should
just do this on your own so you don't have
to worry about her rejecting the baby. Do this on
your own with me?

Speaker 2 (49:58):
Yeah, yeah, just just yeah. She clearly, like Sophia said,
there is some ulterior motive.

Speaker 3 (50:03):
Is it she wants him? She's like roll mansally interested.
Does she just want him as a spur, as a
baby juice donor it's.

Speaker 1 (50:10):
Something she wants him? But man, what a crazy move
on her part. Oh in insane? How old are all
of them? Do we know? Do we get those ages.
Do you think, Sophia, I don't know.

Speaker 4 (50:21):
And then also male and thirty two females.

Speaker 3 (50:25):
Okay, And then and then also if if she is
just looking for like a baby daddy, for a donor, why.

Speaker 2 (50:34):
Go to this is such a complicated situation. Go to
a single dude.

Speaker 1 (50:39):
Yeah, that's like down that you like, can but she's
you know, it created the attachment with this guy from work,
you know, guess feels comfortable. Yeah, he didn't really stand
up for me, but said that he didn't think I
would do that. It was all very hard to read.
But I feel better about my decision overall. By the way,
you want to feel better about your decision to spend

(50:59):
more time with us? Oh god, you you should listen
to full episodes of stories just like this. Just go
to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast app and search. Okay, storytime,
there's another relevant update. But John, Yes, I feel like
we're not quite getting away from the relationship with the
speed that we may need.

Speaker 2 (51:19):
Yeah, he like he is.

Speaker 3 (51:21):
Just I feel like there's like a like a time
and place in a relationship where the the trust of
them kind of like caring for you, you know, is just
like completely obliterated and he has He's obliterated it, nuked it,
just absolutely nuked it. And yeah, Op just needs it.
And you know what, I think she's I think she's

(51:42):
getting there and she's realizing she's coming out of out
of like being non confrontational, not wanting to rock the boat.

Speaker 1 (51:48):
And I think, yeah, which is good, Which is good.
This is like character development at least one at least
like on one side.

Speaker 3 (51:54):
Yeah, think, thank god she caught it before they had
imagine they had a baby yet, Oh my god, So
thank god it was caught.

Speaker 1 (51:59):
Now, you know, we really speak on Wednesday. He checked
in a few times, but I let him know that
we would talk Thursday. Thursday morning, he let me know
that he turned into his letter of resignation Wednesday morning.

Speaker 3 (52:09):
Huh, so like like basically being like, hey, I'm gonna
cut her off so hard, I'm quitting.

Speaker 1 (52:15):
Yeah, I think he's trying. I think he knows how
massively he aft up. And now he's like like I'm
going to lose my my wife, hail Mary, which you know,
like I mean is better than not. I mean, I
think he is showing that he's choosing her. I just
don't necessarily, Like, I don't think we have enough information

(52:37):
to show that he's actually changed and is not manipulative.
But I do think he's trying to send a message
to her like, hey, I'm choosing you. I don't care
about this woman, Like I'm cutting her out of my life.

Speaker 3 (52:48):
Even that though, it's just like just the stupidity of
like that's gotta be damaging to his career. And that's
also you know, the funance disability both of them.

Speaker 1 (52:58):
I don't know, it's just yeah, that's actually a good pint.
Miss Chamber and says he's making a lot of big
decisions without talking to Op.

Speaker 3 (53:04):
True, why why didn't he go to her and say, like, hey,
to do this? Would this make you feel better?

Speaker 1 (53:11):
Yeah? Yeah.

Speaker 4 (53:13):
Also, I just think, like if I didn't hear the
beginning of this story him in the middle of it.
But I think if you guys, if like, if there's
ever a couple where one person doesn't want to have
a child and one person does, that just cannot work. Mm,
Like you guys have the like, if that's a deal
breaker for you, that cannot work.

Speaker 2 (53:30):
Yes, he said it was.

Speaker 4 (53:32):
Yeah, it was no negotiable for him and Op. He
was clearly like I don't want to do this. Yeah,
that's just a relationship that can't work. It would no
matter the therapy, because you guys have just want different things.

Speaker 1 (53:43):
Yeah, alsopia, you're glowing by the way, Ah, it might
be the light.

Speaker 2 (53:50):
Positive.

Speaker 1 (53:51):
He hasn't heard from her, but doesn't intend to seek
her out to say goodbye either. He apologized he just
thought he was doing the right thing and thought this
would make me happy. Don't feel extremely betrayed. He is
dealing with loss and other things. We both agree that
our communication has really deteriorated in the past year, and
then we need to fix this. So no lawyer, no Jim,
just therapy for us. You know, I do think we

(54:14):
went to some pretty crazy dark places. I will say
he does feel like he's at least improving a little bit,
and I do think going to therapy is really important.
And I do think she is taking back her power. Yes,
I think like he's made her feel very powerless in
this and but yeah, I'm just I think we need

(54:38):
a I think we need a lot of therapy and
a lot of space to make this relationship work, if
we even think it should.

Speaker 4 (54:47):
I think I think they have different values I don't
think it can work.

Speaker 2 (54:50):
Yeah, I don't think it can work.

Speaker 4 (54:51):
Like, maybe they could have gotten through all of this
stuff had she wanted a child, but they just want
different things.

Speaker 1 (54:58):
Well, I think that's where that story ends, and this
episode ends.

Speaker 2 (55:02):
I'm sorried.

Speaker 1 (55:04):
Well, you're about to get more sad, because if you
love us, make sure to subscribe Oh we love you,
and see it tomorrow

All Episodes

My sister-in-law was CHEATING on her partner… I secretly helped him move out! | Reddit Stories | EP2115

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Boysober

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Dateline NBC

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}My sister-in-law was CHEATING on her partner… I secretly helped him move out! | Reddit Stories | EP2115